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#hurt loki
loki-kingofdreams · 4 days
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((OOC - is anyone into hurt Loki comfort? Like Loki is hurting and needs comfort and care? I’ve had as much as I can take and I’ve finally broke down tonight))
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viviennes-tears · 2 months
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It's just an illusion (Loki, Thor and Odin drabble)
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A/N: Thank you to anonymous for sending in the prompt back in October 2023, apologies for the lateness, I am trying to get on track. Although I will admit this one was a challenge as there wasn't a lot given in the prompt for me to go off with, I had to do a few rewrites before landing on this version, but I hope it's good enough 😊 x
(Prompt requests are still closed just finishing the last from October 2023)
Prompt requested by Anonymous on Tumblr: Prompt - Loki has done a lot of bad things, but Thor and Odin weren't exactly the perfect brother and father. Thanx!
Summary: Loki, Thor and Odin are in therapy after the events of New York as they had promised Frigga to sort through their issues. Thor is his usual boastful self, while Loki and Odin loathe every second. However things get out of hand when Thor mentions Loki's jealousy and his chaotic behaviour.
Warnings: Family disputes, mentions of physical and mental torture, favouritism and illusions to hide the pain behind
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"I do all these things to impress my father...you know make him proud of me. I also can't deny the fact I enjoy all the attention too. The clap on the back from friends and fans. Or the innocent smile from the shy women is always a treat. That look, you know that look, the one that means they want to know what it's like to be with a real hero." Thor's boastful behaviour had completely gone off course, causing the female Therapist to clear her throat and shuffle in her seat. Loki rolls his eyes which triggers Odin to grumble at him for directing it at his brother.
"Let's bring it back to the relationships you have with odin and Loki." The Therapist says after recovering and trying her best to remain professional.
"Right...I feel that after my time on Earth and becoming an Avenger there's some mutual respect between myself and my Father. As for things with Loki and I...I feel as though he is jealous of my success." Loki scoffs as soon as the words leave Thor's mouth. "See, he's just proving my point!"
As Thor continues to complain about Loki's behaviour Loki gets up and starts to head out however he doesn't get very far. "Lo-"
"SIT BACK DOWN!" Odin barks over The Therapist, "you made a promise to your Mother that you would stay until the end." The mention of Frigga is what made Loki stop in his tracks, and he sighs heavily, then he returns to his seat as he doesn't want to let her down again.
After everyone settled down again The Therapist turned her attention to Loki. "Loki...a little while back Thor had been exiled and Odin was in Odinsleep, Asgard was then under your rule, given you were the next in line. Frigga had entrusted Gungnir to you and she believed in you. That was quite a lot of responsibility to suddenly have." She says gently and watches Loki's expression carefully, yet she notices that he is trying to seem unaffected by her words, however the way he nervously plays with his hands is more telling than his mask of indifference. "You went down to Earth during that time to inform Thor that he is to remain in exile and you mentioned that the burden is now yours to bear in his stead. However things started to escalate after that time. Thor and the Warriors Three had to put an end to it before things got out of hand, Odin had awoken by that point, but you had given up, falling off the Rainbow bridge in the end." She continues speaking gently, but he clearly knew how to keep his emotions masked well.
"We never imagined after grieving after the fall that he would come back and reap havoc over New York." Thor pipes up, his words are spoken with weight to them, yet it angers Loki due to his choice of words.
"I HAD NO CHOICE!" Loki yells, as he stands up abruptly and points his finger at Thor. The brothers continued to argue for several minutes, The Therapist trying her best to calm things down, but Odin was losing his patients and began to head out. "Where do you think you're going?! You promised Mother you'd also stay until the end." Loki throws Odin's words back at him and he knows he has him for that.
"Can we all just take a deep breath and sit down?" The Therapist says, as she stood up herself now and put her hands out to gesture for there to be calmness now. Odin grumbled to himself but remained standing near the door, Thor settled down as if he had been scolded like a child, whereas Loki took a little longer before sitting back down this time. "I understand that therapy isn't easy, but things won't change if you don't try...now Loki in your own words calmly explain as to why you didn't have a choice about the events in New York." She continues to say and hopes they will get somewhere as long as Loki cooperates. 
Loki's jaw tightens as he contemplates what he should say. He's never been the one to talk civilly about anything to do with emotions, the lack of anyone being in his corner, but also his struggles of dealing with the consequences of his actions. The room is silent for the most part, Odin clearly impatient in the back of the room, but all eyes are on Loki. The Therapist can see he is struggling internally about how to address this topic and therefore she gently reaches out her hand and places it on his arm for encouragement.
"I don't enjoy hurting people...I-I don't enjoy it. I do it because I have to...because I've had to. It's a part of the illusion...it's the cruel elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear...when you have nothing else left to lose and at your most vulnerable state anyone can bend your mind to do their bidding. Your own thoughts are murky and crossed with someone else's ideology while you're being both physically and mentally tortured...you lose yourself. You don't want to do it, but you have no choice." The pain in Loki's voice was evident to what he's been through and having to do it alone. The hefty weight he has been burdened with and the consequences from those actions have all come to a broken shell of man he once was. 
A shimmer of green covered around Loki for a few seconds, the walls of an illusion he had created came down, revealing a much more dishevelled Loki. His hair unkempt, his clothes baggy and torn, his face much paler than usual, his eyes bloodshot and dark circles beneath them. Thor's eyes widened in shock and his jaw lowered, he had no idea, seeing his younger brother in this state after what he said hurt him deeply. Odin showed very little in light of everything. Not that Loki expected anything from revealing the truth.
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Tags:
@jennyggggrrr @foxherder
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Loki Masterlist
Source: @viviennes-tears
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lailyn · 5 months
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Going Under
Summary: If there was one good thing about the TVA, it was Mobius.
Set in the middle of S2E3
"Hey, B-15's called us for a briefing." Mobius poked his head into the darkened room. "Thought you and I could grab something to eat before she chewed us out, you think you're up for it?"
"You go right ahead," a weak voice answered from somewhere underneath the blanket. "I'm feeling a bit unwell."
"What's wrong? You seemed fine an hour ago."
"Well, they don't call me the Amazing Loki for nothing," the lump on the bed mumbled. "I am, after all, the Master of Illusions."
Mobius took in the dimmed light, the curtains drawn, and made an educated guess. "Is it your head?"
A shock of unruly dark hair abutting the top half of a high forehead appeared. "To start with, yeah."
Mobius sighed. "I'm not surprised. You took quite the fall in front the whole of Chicago. I'd be too embarrassed to get out of bed too."
He sat down gently on the bed. "Can I get you anything? Tylenol, aspirin, something stronger?"
More of Loki's face emerged, and Mobius found himself wincing; the god was so pale Mobius could see the veins pulsating at his temples.
"I've taken the liberty of plundering your medicine cabinet. If I were any more medicated, I would be radioactive," Loki muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose.
Mobius clicked his tongue in sympathy, for he knew just how high Loki's pain threshold was.
"That bad, huh." After an awkward pause, "She looks tiny but I guess her blows packed quite a punch."
Loki groaned. "Enough rubbing my nose in it, Mobius."
"I wasn't making fun of you," Mobius said quietly.
"Feels like you were."
"You were trying not to hurt her. I get it now."
Loki gave a little scoff. "A lot of good that did all of us. Victor still got away."
"Hey, we found him once, we can find him again."
"And Renslayer." Loki peered at his friend blearily. "You seem to be handling it well, seeing her again."
"You know me. Diplomacy first and foremost. Failing that, guilt-tripping."
"There isn't a shred of guilt to be found in that woman. You had every authority to take her in by force."
Mobius shrugged. "Sometimes holding back is a sign of strength. I learned that from you."
Loki rolled his eyes and immediately regretted it as pain exploded behind his temples. "Yeah, tell that to Sylvie. I tried your cerebral approach, and all I got to show for it is a concussion."
Mobius' eyes were deep wells of sympathy. "You'll live."
"I'll live," Loki agreed wearily. "I always do."
"Attaboy." Mobius slapped Loki's blanket-clad thigh lightly. "Rest up. When you feel like eating, let me know. I brought us back a little treat from the fair."
Loki made a face. "Not Cracker Jack again."
"Are you kidding? Who goes to the same concession stand twice?" Mobius asked incredulously. "Wait till you try it. No one does beef like Chicago. No one did better beef than Chicago 1893."
"You sure it's fit for consumption?" Loki eyed his partner warily. "It's nineteenth century meat."
"You had no problem eating Kablooie," Mobius pointed out. "That was sixteenth century, at least."
"That was candy. Candy's different."
Mobius snorted lightly. "Of course it is."
They shared a chuckle before it was abruptly cut short by Loki's little gasp of pain. He reached for his head, only to find that Mobius had beat him to it.
"You don't have to - " he started, but Mobius shushed him.
"Shh." Gentle fingers massaged his temples in slow, circular motion. "Just close your eyes, and try to relax."
"I need to get through to her, Mobius," Loki mumbled. "I just don't know how."
"We'll work it out," Mobius said soothingly. "Together."
"I'm so tired," Loki whispered. "But I can't afford to be, can I?"
Mobius did not answer for a long time. "This is not on you, Loki."
This is on you, Sylvie had said, when Victor Timely made his escape, and fools of them all.
Who should I believe, then? Loki asked silently. You or Sylvie?
"Stop it," Mobius admonished. "Stop thinking."
"I'd sooner stop breathing. My mind is all I have."
"You Lokis are so damn stubborn," Mobius muttered under his breath. "Not to mention reckless. How y'all managed to live this long I'll never know."
"The Norns have a twisted sense of humour," Loki said bitterly. "Just read my file. It's not for the lack of trying that I'm still living."
"Stop." Mobius' voice was harder now. "Enough with this, Loki. Have some goddamn sense of self-preservation. You're alive for a reason. Find it."
Loki opened his eyes slowly. "Sorry."
"Don't apologise to me," Mobius grumbled. "I'm not the one doubting myself."
Loki drew in a deep, shuddery breath. "I'll try harder. I promise."
"Yeah, that can wait," Mobius said kindly. "When you're feeling better."
He stood to leave, but when Loki tried to do the same, his eyes narrowed. "What do you think you're doing?"
"The briefing - "
"I said," Mobius articulated each word so there was no mistaking his meaning, "- the briefing can wait."
"But we have to - hey!" Loki's protests fell on deaf ears; despite being the smaller of the two, Mobius somehow managed to manhandle Loki back into bed.
"I've got it, Loki," Mobius said firmly. "I work here. You don't."
Loki swallowed hard to quell his nausea and frustration both. "Mobius…"
"I've got you."
Be it from the weight of Mobius' hand on his chest or the sudden cold compress on his head, Loki felt instantly comforted. Despite his disequilibrium, a calmness befell him, and with it, a stark realisation that throughout his long life, there had not been many he could trust, but this man right here, with his sad eyes and kind smile?
Loki trusted this man with his life.
"Okay, Mobius," he conceded with a sigh. "Okay."
"Attaboy."
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elvenfforestydd · 1 year
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Alright, folks, what is your favorite H/C Loki Trope? A few of mine are:
Traumatised Loki at Avengers Tower
Loki Tortured by Odin.
Loki Tortured by Thanos.
Slave Loki: Specifically somewhere in space and then "bought" (rescued) by an Avenger.
Loki hiding using illusions to hide how bad it really is.
Loki with trust issues.
Thor busting Loki outta somewhere bad and being super protective.
Drop me an Ask with your favorite tropes :)
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tired-truffle · 2 years
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Rivers and Roads
A Lokixfem!reader Fic
Word Count: 2.3k
Part 11/16
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Masterlist
Loki sniffed the air, looking at you like you were a disease-infested rat, “Are you ill?” 
“I’m fine,” You crossed your arms over your chest, “And stop smelling me, it’s weird.”
He paid no mind to your comment and waved his hand distractedly, the sound of bath water sloshing in the basin reaching your ears. 
“Enjoy it while the air is still warm enough for you to stand it.” He said, no sympathy for your weak mortal body. 
You sighed, you didn’t want to deal with him right now. You may not still feel like throwing up, but you did feel like you’d just run a marathon and you didn’t have the energy for his constant rejection. 
You grabbed a pair of clean clothes from the drawer beneath the bed, you had no idea how it always stayed full, or how they always fit you no matter which ones you picked, but you would just chalk it up yet again to magic. 
You shuffled into the bathroom, your shoulders hunched and avoiding looking at Loki. You weren’t sure how much more of his disdain you could take today. You shucked off your dirty clothes, leaving them in a basket that had appeared off to one side of the washroom. You were getting really tired of having to write everything strange off as ‘magic’. You wanted to understand, to know why he was able to manipulate energy into obeying his will, to summon warm water for the bathtub, but not be able to heal himself. Yet when you’d tried to ask in the past few days you’d been met with ‘You’re puny mortal mind could never understand’ and that had been that. 
What had happened that made you deserve to be treated like this? The complete disregard for your feelings and wellbeing besides basic survival - or making sure you smelled nice apparently - was getting to you. If you’d asked something you shouldn’t have or pushed him too far, all he would have had to do was say so and you would have dropped it. He didn’t need to be a complete ass. There was only so much you could take, even if you knew he was likely doing it to push you away instead of risking you hurting him, your sympathy and patience only went so far. 
You splashed loudly out of the tub, shivering as the air had turned colder since you’d entered.
Damn him and his imperviousness to the cold. He wouldn’t mind it, but it would certainly affect you.
You threw on your clothes and glowered at your reflection. You looked exhausted, likely due to not sleeping through the night, too worried that the God at your side would snap at you for invading his space while you slept, or fearing what would happen should you allow your dreams to take hold. You didn’t think he’d be as kind to you as he was the last time you woke up from a nightmare. You groaned and rubbed your face, something needed to change, and you would have to be the one to initiate it. 
You stepped cautiously out of the bathroom to find Loki lounging on the couch, buried in yet another book in an attempt to ignore you. You shivered where you stood, arms crossed over your chest. 
“Are you sure it’s the fire that’s attracting it?” You asked, clenching your jaw to keep your teeth from clattering. 
“Yes, you may take a blanket from the bed if you need it.” He said without looking up. You weren’t going to argue with that, you may be trying to get him to talk to you, but you weren’t going to be able to do much talking if you were too busy trying not to turn into a popsicle. 
The blanket offered some warmth, but you could still feel the chill seep through. You weren’t built for this kind of weather. 
“It’s still cold,” You complained, tucking your feet under you as you burrowed into the bed.
“Would you rather be eaten or deal with a bit of a chill?” Loki asked dryly, still totally fine in his light cotton clothes despite the cold. You paused, wondering if you should say what you wanted, something to throw a wrench in his indifferent demeanour.
“Of course you see it as only a bit of a chill, you're a Frost Giant, you’re built for the cold.” You said, barely above a whisper. It was the first time you’d purposefully said anything that would give away that you knew more than he was aware you did.
Loki looked up sharply, exactly what you’d been hoping for. You had to keep the self-satisfied smile at bay that tugged at the corner of your lips.
“How do you know that.” He demanded, no room for questioning in his voice. 
“Maybe if you’re nice to me I’ll tell you.” You glared at him, you weren’t about to give him everything he wanted for free. 
Loki closed his book and placed it on the couch, standing up and closing the distance between you in a few strides. He loomed over you, a dark look in his eyes that reminded you of how he’d looked when he kept you in the white cell. You tried not to shrink back, but you were sure you already looked sad and small wrapped up like a cocooned caterpillar in your blanket.
He gripped your chin in his long fingers, not hard enough to hurt, but enough to remind you he wasn’t playing around.
“Tell me.” 
You frowned, “I don’t think you understand what being nice to me entails.”
He leaned closer, the pine scent of his soap filling your nose, “This is me being nice, you have no idea what I am capable of, Princess.”
You wrenched your chin out of his grasp, standing up off the bed and glaring up at him. You still weren’t tall enough to beat him at this game, but you felt better on your own two feet than vulnerable on the bed. You would have liked some shoes to keep your feet from the freezing metal ground, but your thick socks would have to do.
“What did I do to you?” You demanded, “We were getting along perfectly well, and then all of a sudden you cut me off and started belittling me. What happened to all your noble prince crap?”
Loki snarled, “Maybe I tired of your increasingly asinine questions, maybe I realized that I enjoyed my time alone more than I enjoyed being bombarded by you. Be grateful I have not kicked you out to fend for yourself.”
“You wouldn’t do that.”
“Would you like to put it to the test?”
You hesitated, you wanted to call his bluff, but the way his face twisted with rage made you pause, maybe you had underestimated how much he cared for your life. 
Loki chuckled humourlessly, leaning back so he was at his full height, “You understand nothing, mortal, stay in your place.”
You balled your hands into fists at your side, “We’ve done this dance before, Loki, and whether you liked it or not, you eventually let me in. I’ve succeeded once already, why won’t I win again?”
Emotions warred on his face, “I do not make the same mistakes twice.” 
You smirked in triumph, “So you admit it, you knew me before I arrived here.”
Loki stiffened, realizing his mistake, “I admit nothing, you simply do not have the wits to outmatch me.” 
You rolled your eyes, “Deflecting back onto me in hopes that I get upset enough to forget what I was arguing about. I know your tricks, Loki, you can’t fool me.”
“Stop this none sense,” He growled, “You don’t know anything about me.”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” You tilted your head to the side, your gaze softening as you thought of your visions, “I know that when I first met you you acted similarly, threats and taunts meant to get my guard up and answer your questions. It didn’t work, of course, somehow I already knew you then too. I was the one to get your guard down. I don’t remember much of how we got to Earth, you promised to take me with you when you left. Though because of a mistake I made, we remained on Earth after Thanos won. It seems like we even shared a cottage together. When I try to think of that time I only get pieces, but I know in my heart that we were happy. What I don’t know is what ruined it. What happened that led to your imprisonment and my appearance here decades later?”
Grief, so profound that it startled you, crossed Loki’s face before he quickly hid it under his mask of anger. You were getting somewhere, you knew it.
“I don’t know what you're talking about.” He clenched his jaw.
“You kept pictures of us, I found them. You can stop lying, I know the truth.” 
“I have no idea what pictures you’re referring to.” The corners of his mouth turned up in a smirk that made your heart jolt. You reached behind you under your pillow, patting around to find those small pieces of plastic you’d been holding onto for days. There was nothing there. You lifted up the pillow, frustration building in your chest when you found the space empty. 
“What did you do with them?” 
“You were warned against snooping in my belongings,” Loki said, “You should be more careful to listen to what I say.” 
“What aren’t you telling me, why are you keeping this from me?” You pleaded, desperation coating your voice, “Why do I have memories of you, of us, if they aren’t real?” 
Loki remained silent, staring down at you impassively. You thought you’d been breaking through, but you were so tired, he’d just managed to wear you out. 
Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes and you tried to hold them back. Your shoulders slumped and an ache filled your heart. It took you a moment to identify the feeling. You’d felt it before when you’d been in your visions when you tried to think of what had happened. It was grief, “What did I do to you, Loki? I hurt you, didn’t I?”
His jaw went slack with surprise, “You can’t hurt a God.” He didn’t sound as convinced as he would have liked. 
“But I did,” You insisted, “I can feel it, the guilt. Please just tell me why.”
“I can’t.” He looked away from you and towards his feet, the anger seemed to dissipate from him like a deflated balloon.
“You can’t or you won’t?”
“I can’t.” He lifted his gaze to meet yours, that horrible grief back on his face, his eyes wide and his lips parted. 
“Why not?” The tears that you had held back sprang forth against your will, you wanted answers so badly, and you were so close, but Loki stood like an unmovable boulder in your way. 
“You have to figure it out on your own,” Loki sat down on the bed, a few feet away from you. It may as well have been on the other side of the world for how far away from him you felt. You itched to close the cavernous distance, but you held yourself back.
“But you know what happened.” You knew the answer, it wasn’t a question. Loki looked down at his hands.
“I can’t lose you,” He whispered so quietly you almost thought you’d imagined it. 
You remembered that vision where you’d been stuck in that orange realm, water layered over the ground. You’d seen Loki on his knees, his face painted with tears. He’d accused you of leaving him. The pain you’d seen in his eyes was so similar to what you saw in Loki now, it broke your heart once more, though you were never sure if it had ever fully healed.
“Again.” You completed his sentence, “You can’t lose me, again.”
The tortured look he gave you said more than words ever could. Whatever you’d done, you’d hurt him so deeply that the only thing he could think to do was to shut you out before you did it again. That was where all this guilt came from, you’d been able to squeeze past his defences, only to shatter him from the inside.
You scooted closer to him, tentatively taking his hands in yours, they were warm and soft, and you never wanted to let go, “What did I do, Loki?”
His lips parted as he let go of one of your hands, reaching up to wipe the tears from your cheeks. He looked like he wanted to tell you, even if he was struggling to get the words out. You felt victory surge through your chest, though it was short-lived.
Blinding pain raced across your skull and you cried out, pressing your palms against your eyes to try to lessen it. 
“Princess, what happened?” Loki asked in alarm, but you were unable to answer, your tongue felt like a block of lead and your throat felt raw like you’d been screaming for hours. 
Your chest rattled with a deep, wet cough and you covered your mouth with your elbow. When you pulled back, you saw bright red, thick liquid had stained your shirt. You felt something wet seep onto your upper lip and touched it with shaky fingers. It was more red liquid that in your panic you barely registered as blood. Lots of blood. 
You swayed, your head feeling light and your eyelids drooping. You felt sick to your stomach, but you had nothing left to empty out. 
“I shouldn’t have said anything,” Loki gritted out, guiding you gently onto your side, your head propped up on his pillow. You tried to argue, you wanted him to tell you more, but your mind was so foggy you couldn’t even begin to think of an intelligible sentence.
“Rest. I will fix this.” He promised, his voice laced with dread. You tried to protest, but you could do nothing but give into your body's wishes, and you were pulled into a deep and fitful sleep. 
A/N: Would love to hear what anyone thinks of this so far!!
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fuyu-no-akuma · 2 years
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Hi, I need help finding a fanfic on ao3.
Basically, it's about Loki getting burned during Ragnarok and trying to deal with it by himself while on the Statesman. It addresses how he has a high pain tolerance due to Thanos's torture. Eventually, he's injuries get infected and Thor find out about it, leading to him and Bruce to try and heal him.
I can't remember much more than that, but I truly need to find it, so I'd appreciate if someone could help me.
Thank you in advance.
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acasualcrossfade · 1 year
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Whumpril Day 3- Rope Burns
Written for @whumpril 2023 challenge
Marvel, Loki and Mobius
881 words
Mobius’s team finds the Loki Variant they’ve been hunting. Turns out, Loki’s in worse shape than Mobius could have imagined.
TW: physical abuse, scars, burns
Mobius squinted in the bright fluorescent lights, rubbing exhaustion out of his eyes. He’d been doing back-to-back hunts for this Loki until Ravonna had sternly requested he’d get at least a night’s rest. So, B-15 had taken point on the hunt and managed to bring in the Loki Variant that Mobius was looking for. 
But once Mobius took a quick look through the interrogation room window, he bit back an annoyed groan. “That’s not L1130. That is some other Loki variant in his Jotunn form, half-asleep.” He fought the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose. 
Why did there have to be so many of these Variants?
B-15 tapped the window with the corner of her folder. “Nope, it’s him. He matches the description. But he was on Sakaar and that place wasn’t a threat when we looked into it.”
Mobius met her eye. 
“We couldn’t cuff him because he’s got some pretty bad burns on his wrists,” she continued. “And he hasn’t shifted back to his usual human glamor. We aren’t sure why.”
Mobius took a closer look at the Variant. 
It took a minute to put it together. The Loki he’d studied looked human, and even in photos had this air of…arrogance.
The Loki that sat in that room wasn’t half-asleep, but was half-slumped in the metal chair with his head hanging over the table. Loki’s skin was an awful shade of pale blue; his entire body was sharp angles, and all that could be heard from the room was Loki’s laborious breathing.
His long, black hair hung in knotted, uneven strands, as if someone had tried to cut it after an unsuccessful attempt at brushing it. It was riddled with lint and shone slightly in the light.
His arms sat in front of him, but the shirt he’d been wearing was worn and filled with holes, remnants of what once had been a long sleeve. The shirt was charred in some places and torn in others.
The skin around Loki’s wrists and neck were an angry red against blistered blue.
“What did Medical say?” Mobius asked as his head thumped slightly, trying to fit the pieces together. This was far from what he studied.
B-15 shook her head and frowned. “They're dealing with a breach emergency and are at least twenty minutes out.”
He took in Loki’s form, worry and confusion gnawing at his ribcage. “What’d they do?” Mobius breathed.
B-15 pressed the file towards Mobius. “He was alone there. The entire building was empty.” She paused, looking back at Loki before meeting Mobius’s eyes. “We aren’t sure why they left him there.”
Mobius took the file from her, not taking his eyes off the Loki variant. He sat so still, it was as if he was made from stone. And the way his face didn’t move or twitch, he might as well have been. 
Mobius ran a tired hand down his face. The other thing about studying Loki was the knowledge of how to treat one’s wounds. “Alright, round up our team.” He paced back and forth before nodding. “I’ll need honey, cold aloe vera, and some of 6788’s antibiotic treatment.”
Ten minutes later, Mobius stepped quietly into the interrogation room with a tray of his requested items. He’d interrogated too many Loki’s to count, but this was the first time one looked so…battered. Sure enough, the Loki Variant sat uncuffed at the table. Various burns, scars, and cuts were etched up and down its body but the worst were definitely around his neck and wrists.
What had done that to him?
Who had done that to him?
“Loki?” Mobius began, deciding to start with the Variant’s name.
No response. 
Mobius held out the tray and then placed it carefully on the corner of the table. “Your mother used to make a salve for burns and minor injuries. It won’t be the same exact one, but it’ll be close.”
The Variant’s eyes shifted to Mobius, the dull red looking blankly at him. “M-mother?” Loki rasped. His voice was low and gravelly, and sounded as if he was trying to remember. “Th-Thor?”
“We’re looking for him, too,” Mobius assured. 
Loki only gave a more wheezy breath in response.
Slowly, Mobius took a seat in the empty metal chair opposite the Variant. “Those look pretty bad,” he commented, pointing to the blistered skin. “Can I help?”
For what seemed like minutes, Loki didn’t move. But then, he slowly moved his wrists a fraction of an inch toward Mobius.
Mobius felt something in him break, but he nodded quickly. “The salve’ll be a bit cold, bet me know if it’s too cold.”
Loki responded with the slightest of nods.
Mobius hovered over Loki’s wrist for a second before gently applying the salve to the inflamed skin. Loki seemed to loosen instantly, the hard lines of pain around his eyes seeming to soften. 
Mobius couldn’t remember the last time he worked with such gentleness and care. He worked slowly and by the time he’d finished one wrist, Loki’s labored breathing had also softened into a wheezy, but more even, breath.
When he’d finished with the one, Loki held his other wrist with a bit more assurance. 
“Good to know it works,” Mobius said softly, giving Loki a quick smile before continuing.
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The Loki!mpreg bang posting week has started and I was so lucky to have the wonderful and talented @lailyn claim my whump bomb! XD
Very special occasion because I will post more than one chapter per day for this fic, so to finish it within the posting week XD.
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villainboygirl · 4 months
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This scene breaks my heart.
Loki is cleary on the verge of a panic attack, traumatized, struggling to breathe... and Mobius reassures him, gently telling him that everything is okay🥺🥺
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kortsitron · 5 months
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Comfort
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✮ PARING Loki Laufeyson × Gender Neutral! Reader
✮ WARNINGS/TAGS hurt/comfort, drabble, avenger! Loki, unsure!(?) Loki
✮ SUMMARY You came to Loki for comfort
✮ A/N I won't lie, I have been feeling like shit and honestly I would die to go to sleep in Loki's arms while he tells me I'll be alright. I also made it neutral enough that the comfort can be read no matter what your situation is [ao3]
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He couldn't quite recall it really happened. He wasn't exactly the nicest nor the cuddliest one, or at least that's how Loki saw himself.
But somehow you ended up at his door in the middle of the night. You were a sobbing mess, not being able to catch your breath, and as much as Loki thought he wasn't the right person to comfort you, he couldn't just let you suffer.
You came specifically to him, so he took you in, even though he believed there were other people who would be able to take better care of you during that situation.
And that's how he invited you to his bed, where the two of you cuddled, as he played with your hair as his chilly fingers of his other hand traced your spine. It seemed like his unusual body temperature calmed you down, even though your breath was still shaky at times and you were catching deep breaths uncontrollably.
He found the sound of your heartbeat quite soothing. At first it was almost furious, making him worry that your heart was going to jump out of your chest. But then started to slow down, until it became nice and steady.
He kept murmuring sweet nothings into your ear. His voice was a little raspy from sleep, but it gave it a nice, soothing effect. He kept giving you little, but meaningful kisses, over your forehead, on the crown of your head, on your cheeks, nose. All over your pretty, tear stained face.
When you finally fell asleep, Loki held you tighter. As much as he wasn't sure for long he wanted to be a part of Avengers, he knew he couldn't just leave you alone with your troubles, especially when you were hurting so much.
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darrensomft · 3 months
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Master post for The untimely demise of Mobius M Mobius comic that I’ll be updating as we go💫
Thank you guys for every comment and every lil screech in the tags💚 you’re the highlight of my day🤲💚✨
(pages 1-29)
tag list💚
@shiskabubble @natendo-art @revenge-of-the-assbutt
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That's the end of Side A 🤲💚✨
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Cassete player button clicks and our journey begins (That's the start of side B)✨💫✨
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lokisswiftie · 4 months
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Loki headcanons (smut) involving body worship
Loki body worship Headcanons
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Warnings: Smut (ofc),
• alright, let’s get into it. If you were the one worshipping him it’d drive him wild. Like if you’re kissing over his body he’s probably fighting to try and keep a level head.
• if it’s the other way around, I can imagine him being very gentle with you. He’s trying to rile you up (it’s working) while occasionally giving you what you want.
• I just think he’s a huge tease ok
• I think he would want to take this opportunity to show you how much he adores you. And if you’re insecure about your body, he’s deliberately showing extra care to the places you most worry about.
• he wants to see you satisfied and content by the time he’s done.
• He wants for you to know how much you mean to him
• also he’s constantly praising you
“Darling You Look breath taking like this..”
“Don’t hide your beautiful sounds from me.”
And more. He’s spending most of the time complimenting you… that’s when is mouth isn’t busy with other tasks ;)
• he’ll do anything to draw those noises out of you.
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nygmobblepot-trash · 6 months
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Mobius dealing with Loki's feelings: "Tell me everything slowly and we'll figure it out together. You're amazing. I'll do anything for you. I just want you to be okay. I'm with you no matter what happens."
Mobius with his own feelings: "I'm going to bury this until I die or it bursts out randomly. If it does I'll act like nothing happened. If I dissociate enough maybe it'll go away."
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lailyn · 2 years
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Fear Not Love
Relationship: Loki/Stephen Strange
Summary: A date night took a tragic turn
TW: Major Character Injury
Written for Sicktember 2022, prompt no 11: Emergency Room/Ambulance
"This is nice."
"It is nice, isn't it?"
"It's very nice of Wong to let you have one night off."
"Wong's not my boss," Stephen grumbled. "But yeah, remind me to buy some bao on the way home."
"So how does it feel?" Loki asked curiously. "Not being Sorcerer Supreme anymore?"
Stephen had learned by now not to think too hard when confronted with difficult questions; deflection almost always worked. "How does it feel losing your magic?"
"I didn't lose my magic, Strange. It's only suppressed whenever I'm away from New Asgard."
Stephen harrumphed in discontent. "I can't believe you agreed to that."
"That's what Thor said. He thinks I've mellowed."
His pace slowed. It was not his cue to speak; something was coming.
"Thor knows nothing."
At Loki’s words, Stephen froze entirely. "Please don't say you did it for me."
"Why?" Loki queried. "Does it frighten you?"
"That depends," Stephen said tightly. 
"Fear not, Strange,” Loki said, boldly hooking an elbow through his. "Did you listen to Bruce's latest podcast? 'Carpe diem. Try a new food. Go ziplining. Do all the things that scare you'."
The sudden warmth of their linked arms evoked an emotion Stephen had not felt in a long time. "Does this scare you?"
"What?"
"Us."
"I'll let you in on a secret," Loki’s conspiratorial whisper bristled Stephen’s ear, "Everything scares me."
Stephen raised a sceptical eyebrow. “Really?” 
“It’s true.” Loki shrugged, before murmuring, "If you say this to anyone, I'll kill you."
Stephen chuckled, but his amusement faded as the meaning behind Loki's seemingly innocent confession emerged. "When it no longer scares you is when it stops being exciting for you." 
A silence fell upon them as each wallowed in his own thoughts: Stephen in the realisation that boredom would one day drive Loki away…Loki in his new-found discovery that Stephen might just be the one person in the world who could read him so effortlessly, so accurately.
"So what are you in the mood for tonight?" Stephen asked. He could stand the silence no longer. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you were coming or I would have booked us a table at your favourite place."
"Don't be sorry," Loki said mildly. "I was the one who imposed."
"Stop," Stephen chided. "We're past that." 
He gave Loki's forearm a gentle squeeze. "It really is great to see you."
Loki returned Stephen’s smile with a shy one of his own, eyes gleaming with excitement he could barely conceal. "Likewise, Doctor. To answer your question, I think I'm in the mood for something…adventurous. How about some street food?"
Stephen winced. "I'm not sure that's such a good idea."
"Why not? Bruce said - "
"To try new foods, yeah, I heard," Stephen laughed. "I mean absolutely no offence, but we haven't totally figured out all your food intolerances. I just don't want you to end up in the emergency room like the last time."
"Excuse me, I was merely unprepared," Loki said indignantly. 
"And - " Stephen raised a reminding finger, "You are magicless tonight. You are essentially a Muggle."
Loki chortled. "I’m a what?"
"A human." Stephen could not stress his point enough. "A human baby."
"Alright, alright! I get the picture," Loki said in exasperation. "But you can fix whatever happens after, can't you?"
"Brains, sure." Stephen made a face. "Not baby stuff."
With a roll of his eyes, Loki pulled on Stephen's arm and led him down the alleyway deeper into the bowels of Koreatown. "And you call yourself a doctor."
 ******************************
"I don't know what this is but it tastes really good," Loki mumbled through a mouthful of something chewy the food vendor had called tteokbokki. Balancing the paper plate in one hand so Stephen could poke his toothpick through one of the spongy, little sausage-shaped things, he licked his lips with gusto. "Make sure you get some of the hot sauce too."
"I think you had the rice cake," Stephen abandoned the slippery mission and chose a piece of fried fish cake instead. It tasted surprisingly good. "Ooh, that's spicy."
"You alright there, Doctor Strange?" Loki laughed as Stephen's face reddened from the heat.
"Oh, yeah," Stephen coughed, thumping his chest a few times. He could usually handle spicy, but Korean red peppers just hit different. 
Amazingly, Loki polished off the entire plate with nary a sip of water. Truth be told, Stephen could see himself spending the night watching his boyfriend eat; it was a rare sight, Loki indulging in the simple delights of Midgardian food. 
Thank you, Doctor Banner. Stephen made a mental note to thank the physicist should their paths cross sometime in the future.
"So what should we try next?" Loki asked. "Something to counter the heat, perhaps?" 
Stephen spotted a traditional dessert stall that was selling what looked like ice cream. "Fancy some red bean and matcha bingsu?"
"Do I?" Loki's eyes lit up.
But before they could make their way across the busy street, a figure bumped into them hard, knocking Stephen first onto the ground, Loki into the wall.
"Hey, watch it!" 
"That's for New York, you asshole!" 
"Stephen."
"I'm fine," Stephen grunted, picking himself up. "What the hell's his problem?"
"Stephen," Loki called again, his voice tremulous and shaky. 
"What's the matter?" Stephen asked, frowning. "You okay?"
Loki’s throat bobbed up and down as he swallowed, his pale face sallow in the neon lights of the streets. “I think…he… - ”
Loki’s knees buckled, and Stephen lunged, catching him on the way down. “Loki, what is it?”
Loki’s hand fell away from his stomach, and Stephen’s heart lurched at the sight of blood pumping in steady spurts from an abdominal stab wound.
“Shit, shit, shit - ” Stephen shrugged his jacket off and frantically bunched it up into a ball. “Somebody call an ambulance!”
A woman screamed. A crowd began to gather.
" 's fine…" Loki mumbled, "I'm fine…"
Sensing him fading, Stephen applied more pressure on the wound. "Loki, stay awake."
But the bleeding proved to be too profuse to staunch; soon the makeshift compress was squelching under his hand. The bastard must have hit an artery, Stephen thought in horror. 
A bloodied hand reached and grabbed the front of his shirt, but the fingers began to loosen with every gasp, every hitch of breath desperate with pain. "Stephen…"
"Loki," Stephen pleaded. "No."
But Loki was no longer listening.
****************************
A portal appeared mid-air, and a familiar figure walked out, wobbling when the ambulance suddenly made a sharp turn. "Whoa!"
"Wong!" Stephen shouted. "I can use some help here!"
The paramedic who was furiously bagging away looked up from where he was hovered over Loki's head. "You a wizard too?"
"Something like that," Wong muttered, squeezing into the tight space between the wall and the patient. "Not looking so pretty now, is he?"
"Wong," Stephen squeezed his eyes shut in frustration. "Please."
"Fix him, yes, yes." 
Wong's hands began to glow. His mandala soon merged with Stephen's, forming an iridescent latticework of healing magic that domed over Loki's frighteningly still figure.
As the ambulance careened through the impossible New York traffic, Stephen prayed, and prayed, and prayed. 
Not yet.
Not yet.
**************************
A harrowing hour later, Stephen found himself sitting in a waiting room, deserted save for a very perturbed-looking Sorcerer Supreme.  
"That was a close call, Stephen. A very close call."
Stephen propped his elbows on his knees and peered up through hooded eyes. "Will you stop pacing and sit down? You're giving me a headache."
"What is it with you two?" Wong scolded. "Can't you stay out of trouble for one night?"
Stephen's gaze remained fixated on the floor. "Guess we can't."
Wong studied his friend's dejected form. All attempts to raise Stephen's spirits had fallen flat since they got to the hospital, and Wong began to question if there was much else he could do. 
"Loki's out of danger, Stephen."
"Yeah," Stephen drew in a ragged breath. "Yeah, I know."
"The limiters have been lifted. Loki has full use of his magic now."
"He could have died, Wong."
Foreseeing a difficult conversation ahead of him, Wong inhaled deeply. "Did they find the guy who did it?" 
"No one knew who he was. Or if they did, no one's saying anything," Stephen mumbled. "The police are checking the CCTVs right now."
The double doors opened and a woman dressed in scrubs appeared. "Is anybody here for Loki Odinson?" 
Wong drew himself up. "Welp. Guess that's my cue to leave. I'll see you back at the Sanctum."
Stephen nodded gratefully. "Thanks, Wong."
"Tell Loki I wish him well." Wong patted Stephen on the shoulder awkwardly, before disappearing into his portal.
"Recovery's this way." The nurse led Stephen down the hall and into a room. She pulled the curtains back from one of the cubicles. "The doctors are just starting their rounds but you're free to wait here with the patient."
"Thank you, Nurse."
Stephen spent the next few seconds after the nurse left the room simply standing at the foot of the bed. 
With his magic no longer suppressed, some colour had returned to Loki's face. If not for the fingers fiddling idly with the tubes criss-crossing his body, one would think Loki was simply asleep.
Loki's eyes opened slowly. "Hey.” 
Stephen could hardly speak, the lump in his throat was too great. “Hey.”
"You were right. We ended up in the emergency room after all." 
The hollow pit in Stephen's stomach grew. “I am so sorry, Loki.”
“You don’t honestly believe this was your fault, do you?" Loki asked quietly.
Stephen pinched the bridge of his nose, and heaved a shaky sigh.
"You heard what he said,” Loki whispered, grief stricken. Trauma had carved a hundred new lines into his haggard face. “For my own crime I was near slain, and that was mine own fault."
“We restricted your magic thinking you were a threat,” Stephen said tightly. “You are not the threat. We are.”
"One could say that we are a threat to each other," Loki said softly. "But that will not stop me."
Stephen's heart began to race. "Stop you from what?" 
Loki gathered his breath and his courage. "Seeing you."
He had nearly died tonight, and what needed to be said must therefore be said - 
"Loving you."
Stephen's vision blurred. He dropped into the chair at Loki's bedside and grabbed the cold, white hand. "I love you too."
"I'm alright, Stephen," Loki soothed, sensing the anguish in the trembling of his lover’s fingers. "I had you. And Master Wong too, I heard."
A warm feeling flooded through Stephen, before guilt gnawed at him again at Loki's next words. "Though Thor could have warned me that courting on Midgard was such a dangerous affair."
Stephen stifled a groan. "Thor is going to kill me when he hears about this."
"He doesn't need to," Loki objected. "It's none of his business, is it? But to be on the safe side, just avoid him over the next year or so."
Stephen hesitated visibly. "I don't think I can avoid him for that long."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I'm going to have to see you, don't I?" Stephen said, a determined gleam in his eyes. "You don't ever have to leave New Asgard. I will come to you."
"Stephen…"
I’ll speak to the Sorcerer Supreme about this,” Stephen vowed. “I’ll petition the entire Order if I have to. I will not have you exposed like that again. I can’t.”
Loki smiled a sad, sad smile. "I appreciate the sentiment, Doctor, but I know what I am."
"You are a prisoner," Stephen said numbly.
"No." Loki shook his head. "Being with you has liberated me in ways you can't imagine and I can't begin to describe."
Stephen pressed his lips to Loki's knuckles. He could still smell the blood on their hands. "You scared me, Loki."
“Can’t promise I’ll stop.” A tear dewed on Loki’s lashes. “But I can promise to try.”
“That’s good enough for me,” Stephen said breathlessly, before leaning in for a kiss - he could not believe he had not kissed Loki yet - and it was incredibly, unbelievably, impossibly sweet.
He knew not which God or Goddess had answered his prayers tonight, but they had returned Loki to him, and for that, Stephen was eternally grateful. 
Thank you.
FIN
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lousysharkbutt · 2 years
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pls forgive my absence i was moving
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tired-truffle · 2 years
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Rivers and Roads
A Lokixfem!reader Fic
Word Count: 3.7k
Part 14/16
Trigger Warnings at the end of the fic
Tagged readers (let me know if you want to be tagged in future updates!): @scarlet2007 @lovelysizzlingbluebird
Song Recommendation for this chapter:
I made a playlist on my spotify of other songs I think go well with this chapter :)
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Masterlist
“To ensure that whoever possesses it, understands its power; The Stone demands a sacrifice.”
The words you had been dreading to hear since you realized what you would have to do were finally said. You had been suppressing your terror and anxiety since the idea first came to you. Yet, as you stood at the edge of the cliff on Voromir, overlooking its barren yet strangely beautiful landscape, you found that you also felt relief. It was almost over, everything you’d done had led up to this moment and you would make sure you saw it through. You didn’t have any other options.
“In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. A soul for a soul.” 
It took all your willpower to turn around, you knew as soon as you saw Loki, that brief sense of relief would vanish. 
“I accept the stone’s demand.” Your voice wavered as you saw the realization dawn on Loki’s face, quickly replaced by a spark of rage, of betrayal. 
“You knew.” He hissed, taking a few steps forward, “You knew you lied to everyone, you lied to me. Did you really think I would let you sacrifice one of us? And for what? They’ve all been dead for five years, let them stay that way!”
You took a careful step back towards the cliff and he halted his advance, panic fleeting across his face, “I never planned on sacrificing you, they still need you, Thor still needs you. You’ve seen the shape that he’s in, it would tear the last part of his heart away if he lost you too.”
You were right, that moment on the hill at New Asgard had been the first time you’d seen him hopeful in five years, you couldn’t go back and tell him that his last family member had died. You couldn’t snuff out his spark like that.
“I don’t give a damn what my brother needs,” He growled, his fists clenching at his sides. 
You chuckled humourlessly, “We both know that’s a lie.” 
He clenched his jaw, “You know I can stop you, you aren’t strong enough to overpower me. I’ve proven that on many occasions.”
“I know,” You said, palms turned up in an effort to display trust and openness, “but before you try, will you at least hear me out?” 
“Nothing you could say would make me let you fall to your death for some stupid rock.” He spat, his face contorting with disgust, “Do you really think so little of me that you believe I would allow this lunacy?”
“Please, Loki, let me explain.” 
His jaw clenched as though it took all his effort not to spit back a retort. You took that as a go-ahead or as much of one as you were going to get. 
“You brought me here six years ago. You wanted answers on what your future held, but instead, you got me and my faulty memory of a movie series I’d watched.” You smiled sadly at him, “I couldn’t change anything, no matter what I did. I tried so hard but nothing got better. Ragnarok still happened, Thanos still snapped, and here we are, years later and I haven’t made a dent. I have nothing left to offer but this. I have to do this, I couldn’t let anyone else take the risk. Romanoff would have done it, but she’s sacrificed enough. She could have her family back, she deserves to live, to be happy, for once. You all do.”
“And you don’t?” He demanded. You didn’t say it, but the look in your eyes was enough for him to understand that you didn’t think you deserved that, not after all your failures, “And you did change something, you saved me.”
You blew out a shaky breath as you tried to hold back your tears, “I’m not meant to be here, this isn’t my world, you’ll all be fine without me, just like you were before. I chose this as my destiny.” You chuckled under your breath, “It’s my glorious purpose if you will.”
Anger flashed in his eyes, “That’s not funny.”
“Oh come on, Loki, I’m about to die,” Your voice broke and you choked back the ever-building sob in your throat, “Let me have this.”
He ground his teeth, “No.”
Whether that meant he wouldn’t let you have this or he wouldn’t let you die didn’t matter, you had to keep going. You took a step back towards the cliff’s edge, Loki moving with you.
“You have to let me go, you’ll be okay.” You promised, though you weren’t sure who you were trying to convince of this more; Loki or yourself. 
“Princess,” He said so softly, so full of a deep and powerful emotion you won’t let yourself name for fear that you’d back out of your plan. The sound of your name as a plea on his lips shattered your heart into a million pieces and you stifled the sob that tried to pull itself from your throat. You had to do this, you couldn’t give up now, as much as you might want to. 
“I won’t let you go. I need you…” He trailed off, opening his mouth as though he wanted to say more, before shutting it with a look of pain on his face. You saw it then, that subtle ripple in the air as he projected an image of himself while he went invisible. You knew he would do this, you knew him better than you’d like to admit, but you’d come prepared. He underestimated you and you had counted on that.
“Loki, please don’t do this.” Your eyes filled with tears as you felt his arms loop around your waist and up your back, hauling you securely against him as he pulled you away from the edge, spinning so it was his back to the cliff.
“I brought you to this world, I allowed you to come on this trip because you said it would be an easy puzzle that we could both solve, that you wanted to take the chance to see an alien planet with me. You didn’t think you could lie to the God of Lies and get away with it, did you?” His voice sounded so full of rage, but from the way his hands shook as they pressed flat against your back you knew it was to cover up the hurt and the terror he was too afraid to show.
You held back a shuddering sob, leaving your arms hanging limply at your sides. You knew he wouldn’t make it easy for you, but you had had no idea how much the thought of leaving him forever so that the lives of billions could go on would tear at your heart and soul. It was simple enough, in theory, one soul for so many, but it was your soul, and you had tied it so fiercely to the man holding you against him like a lifeline that it became difficult to see past his sad, sea-green eyes. 
“I knew you’d figure it out sooner or later,” You laughed lightly in an attempt to cover your sobs but you ended up with hot tears streaming down your face as you subtly reached into the pocket of your pants and gripped the cold metal inside, “I also knew you’d try to stop me, but I can’t let you, the fate of billions of people depends on it.” You gripped the back of his leather outfit in one hand, the other bringing up the syringe you had hidden. 
“Pray tell what a puny mortal like you could do against a God like me? Must we go back to keeping you in a cage?” His voice dripped with the venom he always used to cover up his true feelings, the ones he didn’t want anyone to know he had, but that had been painfully obvious to you from the moment you first saw him. 
“You’re angry, and that’s okay, you can be angry with me.” You pulled back so you could look at his face creased with worry, you moved your hand that had been clenching his clothes to his cheek, brushing your finger of his smooth skin and released a shuddering breath as he leaned into your touch, his eyes desperately searching yours, “But I need you to know I’m not trying to abandon you, Loki, I wouldn’t be doing this if I had any other choice. You know me, you know I couldn’t condemn someone else to death.” 
“Then you should have let me carry that burden. I would push them over the cliff myself if it meant you would be safe. They already see me as the villain, it wouldn’t make a difference to me.” He leaned forward so your foreheads touched, his skin was warm against yours, a reminder of the life you were giving up for yourself and yet giving to so many others. 
“No.” You shook your head, “You are meant for so much more than that, more than this, more than me,” Your voice cracked and you had to stop before you let your terror break through the wall of emotions you were holding back.
“That’s not your choice to make.” 
You smiled, a true, genuine smile, as you thought of how much he had changed since you first met him, how he’d gone from surviving to living. Those little moments together in your cottage in New Asgard were the reasons you were able to be in this moment, prepared to sacrifice your life, to undo what you hadn’t been able to see. You’d gotten so much more time with Loki than you could ever have imagined, and you were thankful for that gift.
“It’s your choice what you do with your future, just as my sacrifice will be my choice and mine alone.” Before he could react you brought the syringe down as fast as you could and jammed it into his backside, emptying the contents in one quick motion. 
The flash of betrayal in his eyes broke your heart anew, you hated that you had done this to him. 
His eyes widened, “What did you do.” 
It wasn’t a question, it was an accusation.
“Like I said,” Your lips trembled as his grip on you slackened, “I knew you’d try to stop me, and I couldn’t let you. I came prepared.” 
As his body went limp, you tried your best to catch him and ease him onto the floor. You may not have been the strongest person, and he was heavier than you’d anticipated, but you were able to clumsily bang up your knees on the hard rock surface to keep him from getting hurt.
His eyes fluttered as he tried to stay conscious, his breathing slowing as the drugs took effect. 
“Princess,” He whispered, a last, desperate plea, and as much as it killed you to leave him like this, you knew what you had to do. 
“I’m so sorry, Loki,” Your chest spasmed as the sobs you were trying so hard to hold back finally broke free. The tears streamed down your face in rivers as you gritted your teeth against the onslaught of anguish. “I wanted nothing more than to spend my life with you by my side,” You pursed your lips, your salty tears leaking into your mouth. “But I’m afraid that’s not in the cards for us.”
“Don’t leave me.” He begged, his eyes filling with tears as his body remained unresponsive to his wishes. 
“I left you a note, it’s under my pillow.” You ignored his request, if you tried to answer you didn’t know if you’d have the strength to deny him. “I’m not good at saying how I feel, and maybe that makes me a coward for not telling you to your face, but for what it’s worth, I wouldn’t change a thing about the past six years, every moment with you was perfect.” 
He groaned, a small sound of distress as his brain could no longer resist the drugs and he was swept away into unconsciousness. You stroked his cheeks with the back of your fingers, wiping away the few tears he had shed. Your body was wracked with sobs as you leaned forward, placing a light kiss soaked with tears on his forehead, “I’m sorry I never said it when you could hear it,” You whispered, “But I always loved you.”
It took everything you had to pull yourself away from him, you’d already taken enough time. You didn’t know how fast the drugs would wear off on a God, Stark hadn’t given you specifics, and you couldn’t risk him waking back up and stopping you, you only had one dose and even if you had more, you doubt he’d underestimate you again. 
You stepped to the edge of the cliff, staring down at the rocky platform below. Your heart was hammering in your throat, your palms getting slick with sweat, your survival instinct screaming at you to step back. 
“Will this work?” You asked the Red Skull without turning to look at him.
“The soul stone will accept your sacrifice.” The Red Skull confirmed, his voice carrying along the wind towards you. 
You nodded, taking a deep and shaky breath, “Will he hate me for this?” You didn’t know why you asked. Comfort, maybe, or confirmation that you are doing the right thing. Whatever it was, even before the Red Skull answered, you know it wouldn’t be what you wanted to hear. 
“I cannot see the future, it is up to you to decide if a negative outcome to Loki Laufeyson’s life is something you are willing to risk.” 
You hastily wiped the tears off your cheeks as they rolled down and fell towards the open cliff face. He wouldn’t be alone, you may be gone, but he would always have Thor. You had to trust in his brother to look after him, and for Loki to make his own decisions. You hoped that your letter would help, though you knew your betrayal was not something he would get over quickly. 
It was out of your hands, and it was time you stopped stalling. 
You looked once more at Loki, your hands trembling as you took in as much of him as you could while you still had time. You wanted to say goodbye, but it didn’t feel right, you weren’t sure you could stomach the thought of never seeing him again, even though you knew that was what fate had in store for you. You settled on something less permanent, “Goodnight, Loki.”
You turned back towards the cliff edge, closing your eyes, and imagined a better time, a time when you and Loki could have made it through this, maybe spent some more time in New Asgard or explored other cities that Earth had to offer. You could have shown him the place you grew up, maybe you could have found some variant of your family there that would have jogged your memory. Wherever you would have gone, you would have wanted to be with him. 
You leaned forward, terror building in your chest as your feet slipped off the edge of the cliff. The wind whipped through your hair and flipped you around as you fell. Your heart hammered in your throat but you refused to open your eyes, you didn’t want to see what was coming. 
You didn’t feel the impact, you were simply falling, and then you weren’t. Then there was nothing. 
* * *
When you opened your eyes you found yourself at a small metal desk in a dark room, illuminated only by a lamp. In front of you was a letter, the syringe you’d used on Voromir laying beside it. You felt tears run down your cheeks as you read over what you’d written. 
My Prince,
I can’t count the number of drafts I’ve written of this letter since I realized that this was the only way I could fix my mistake. You always tell me that it wasn’t my fault, but I know that if I’d been more careful I could have stopped Thanos. I looked over too many important details, and I could never seem to remember enough. I wish I could let go of that guilt, but trillions of people died and I owe it to them to bring everyone back. I’ve had more years with you than I deserve but I am grateful to have been given the chance to be your friend. You mean more to me than you know.
I’m sure you’ll be upset and angry with my decision, but please, don’t take it out on yourself or anyone else. I can’t tell you how to feel, but I want you to understand that this is my choice and only I am to blame for this, just like how you react is your choice too. You can be mad at me all you want. I’m dead, I can take it. 
At least I’d better be, you only get to read this letter over my dead body… Too soon?
Don’t beat yourself up for not stopping me, I’ve had a whole year since I remembered what the Avengers would have done to un-snap everyone and I’ve spent countless hours thinking of this plan. You’ll only have minutes at best. Though when you get back you won’t have to deal with Thanos again since Nebula didn’t go on the mission, I hope it gives you time to sort through your feelings. Tell Stark he’s welcome that he doesn’t have to die to kill that Thanos. 
I’m not too stubborn to admit that I’m afraid. I have no idea what will happen to me, but I have to fix my mistake. I didn’t stop Thanos from snapping, but I will undo it. It’s strange but I feel relieved that I won’t have to worry about it much longer.
I’m sorry if I make some shitty jokes in this letter or when we get to Voromir, but you aren’t the only one who deflects their feelings through humour. But I’m terrified, I don’t find any of this funny. I’m grieving for things that I will never get to see or have. I don’t know if I have the strength to throw myself over that cliff. That’s why you must be the one there with me. I can be sure I will do everything in my power to keep safe, even if it means I won’t be. I can only do that with you. No one else is as important to me as you. 
We got off to a rocky start, you were still in a bad place, and I had just been launched into a world where no one knew me, but I knew everyone. I like to think somewhere along the way you begrudgingly started to tolerate me (that was your first mistake). After that, I wormed my way into your friendship and somehow you’ve continued to tolerate me for almost six years. I’m not sure if you know how I feel about you, but I plan to make it very clear here in case I chicken out on Voromir. 
It’s so difficult to put my feelings for you into words. I feel like I could never truly capture what my heart tells me every time I see your stupid smirk, but I’m going to try. 
Loki, I love you so much I can barely breathe when I’m around you, but like, in a good way. I love the way your eyes light up when you're teasing me, the way the corners of your mouth tilt up when you are holding back a smirk, and how, without trying, you make me feel like I have a home as long as I’m with you. I feel like the word love isn’t strong enough to describe how I feel about you but I don’t know any other word that would fit. You are more caring than you would ever admit, even if you try to project this image of having a massive ego, which on some level you definitely do (no offence) but I also know you have that stubborn self-sabotaging streak you can’t quite shake. You deserve to be happy, and I wish it could be with me, but I have to do this. I think I’m right in guessing you feel similarly for me to how I feel for you, but boy will this letter be super embarrassing if I got it wrong. 
Please don’t blame yourself for my choice.
You have people who care about you, lean on them when you need. I am so sorry I can’t be there with you, I don’t want to leave you, and I will always love you. No matter where I am I will always carry a piece of you with me, Soul Stone or no. I don’t know what will happen to me, if I’ll just cease to exist or if my consciousness will go elsewhere, but my soul will always remember you. 
You’ll wake up with a soul stone and without me. Maybe build me a statue or a make a play or something cool, but honestly, I think those are more your type of thing. The only thing I want for you when I’m gone is for you to be happy. I don’t expect it to happen right away, maybe you’ll always wonder what could have been like how I’m doing now. But if you take anything from this letter please let it be that I love you more than anything, and your happiness is what I want most of all. I’m sorry that I can’t have what I want be the same as what I need to do. 
I don’t know how to end this letter. I don’t think I want to end it, it feels so final. It feels like a goodbye I’m not ready to make, that I’m going to make sure you aren’t conscious for.
You were okay before me, I believe you can be okay without me. 
I'm sorry for making you endure another death, but I hope that years down the line you can forgive me, I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for doing this to you. 
With love,
Your Princess
Trigger Warnings: Talk of dying, completed self-sacrifice.
A/N: This chapter has a special place in my heart and I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did ❤️❤️
Thank you for all your lovely comments and notes, they mean so much to me!! Only two more chapters and an epilogue to go 🥲
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