Me on the way to a crochet meet 6 hours ago, hyperventilating, crying in the middle of an anxiety attack because I knocked someone's taillight and I'm afraid of my family's reaction : "and they're gonna have stupid quips like 'oh you're back. aww, why didn't you crochet a new taillight for that car' and I'll start crying again and *hyperventilating sounds*"
The three people in the car with me : "literally no one is going to say anything like that. Okay you know what if anyone does say that, we each owe you 10 bucks. Does that help you feel better?"
--- 3 hours later, back at home ---
My sister, while my parents and uncles and cousins are there to witness me crying : "so while you were there why didn't you crochet them a new taillight one time?"
Me, holding back tears, but also 30 bucks richer : *shaky laugh*
So I'm reading for an art history class, and Baudrillard is talking about the trends in colour usage from generation to generation (mostly in interior design, but there's definite spillover into fashion, architecture, etc.), and how every new colour movement is a direct rebellion against the previous one, like how the bright colours of the 60s/70s were a direct response to the austerity and seriousness of the WWII/postwar era, and how a shift back to organized, moralistic neutrals were a direct rejection of 60s/70s gaudiness, etc., and that all makes sense, people find their parent's style tacky, sure
But he goes on to observe how we've now been stuck in a lull of pasty tones and naturalistic finishes for some time, and I'm thinking yes, he's so right, but that's weird, because its been hanging around for so long, like what is it rebelling against anymore? What is it answering to? Well all I had to do was be patient because lo and behold, Baudrillard provides the following sentence, which caused me to completely wig out:
"...except of course, for the spheres of advertising and commerce, where colour's power to corrupt enjoys full
rein"
And I'm like ooohhhhHHHHHH, so this colourless minimalist wasteland of a design principle:
Is maybe hanging on so stubbornly because this corporate hellscape:
is assaulting all of our eyes, inside and outside of our homes, every waking second, and is tainting the very concept of colour into something we can't relax around in our living spaces.
EDIT: The reading was The System of Objects by Jean Baudrillard, 1996 Ed., Part A, Section II, Subheading "Atmospheric Values: Colour" (p. 30-36 in my copy). Even if this was a passionate spur-of-the-moment post, omitting this was pretty silly; my bad.
EDIT 2: I was trying to be chill and leave this one alone, cuz I know most people in the notes are talking to themselves and their followers and not actually me, but 11,000 notes in it's starting to get to me - yes, I am aware that decreased homeownerhship/increased renting/landlord specials/hyperfocus on resale values, are all very direct causes of this too. I totally agree. For me, those were the obvious answers; I think we all get why the owning class is serving this to us. My epiphany moment was about understanding the flip side, the psychology of the consumers who keep accepting it, and even seem to enjoy it. That's what I couldn't understand before, but now I suddenly do. (And for those of you saying such people don't exist, no one actually wants to live without colour - check the notes, bb, they're everywhere. Not everyone has the same brain as you. We all deal with the horrors of capitalism differently.)
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a few things that will now cause Jason extreme fear:
exercise
fear
loud noises
bright lights
fear
high temperatures
threats
low temperatures
being excited
sex
anxiety
stress
F E A R
and here's a fun fact: adrenaline actually causes the memory-making bits of your brain to be stronger, which means you have a clearer memory of exactly what happened to make you afraid
daily reminder how much yours truly is going to violently shake and sob at 2am while watching this and hearing whatever bullshit score gustavos created this time to absolutely rip my heart strings out fiber by fiber while I watch Joel close his eyes while hugging her as she cries into his chest and wraps her arms around his neck
and how I will be completely inconsolable watching them make camp and try to help with each others pains while ignoring their own
And how I will shut my laptop and stare at my wall breathlessly while tears dry on my face because I won’t even have the strength to wipe them away after watching Ellie grab his hand while she thinks he’s dying and he grab hers when they’re approached by Jackson’s men but he thinks it’s danger and so he does it instinctively to protect her