#i Do Not Like the second panel mmmmmm

[frostynovaprime]

Mmmmmm post sleep Tennocon Rambles under the cut

Ofc because I just started vet school last week (yay) I couldn’t attend in person. Really sad I couldn’t attend because I’ve always loved it when I went to the 2017 and 2018 events. Had to watch the stream, but it look like from pictures everyone had tons of fun and I’m glad it was a success. Next year, please let it be closer to the middle of the summer akdjejak

Art panel, the highlight for me as always as an artist myself. Really cool to see all the concept works from way back in Dark Sector. I’m so sad the art book was so expensive and sold out so fast, but I hope this means they can be inspired to do a reprint in the future (maybe when food expenses arent draining my bank like a whirlpool….) The new upcoming concepts I can’t say I’m a fan of all too much. Grendel is my most hated frame but the boar is a cool inpiration for him. I personally think the game is very oversaturated with Liger concepts, so as per most Liger deluxes Sevagoth wasn’t my cup of tea. They designed the frame, why not have someone else take a shot as his deluxe? I didn’t catch who designed Yareli’s bu that one was interesting.

And….. the Heirloom skins collection. They’re pretty. I though Mag’s was for Nova and got too excited for a bit. And as a Frost main I’m always glad for more content containing him, hell I squint at his skin because it has a few elements that are strikingly similar to my Deluxe concept for him back in 2021. But. The price. I want to buy it, but this entire collection pitch is exactly what Digital Extremes has vow to not do in all 10 years with their fair free to play model, and this sets a very bad precedent if it were to continue. $90 USD is too high of a price for a pack of skins marketed as being in celebration of 10 years, inflated artificially with the Regal Aya. A pack of 6 (with an extra bonus, making 7 total and 400 platinum) is $40 which means everything in the second tier pack is only $30. The same price as the low tier. The only new thing the skins intoduce are the Signas, which are cool, but I gesture to Kaithe coronets. The skins have no new visual effects for abilities, no new animations, not even new idles like recent Deluxe skins have. Rebecca used the word “prestigious” for describing the pack. And I beg her to NEVER use that word again for cosmetics. Prestigious content is a very slippery slope. Take the Prestige skins from League. Because of those skins Riot is now thinking they can make a variant recolor of a very old Jhin legendary and mark the price up to $200. Warframe doesn’t need that. Not to mention the FOMO. The Heirloom pack is gone at the end of the year. Even past Prime Access comes back in Resurgence after a few years. Nightwave brings back old items from past story events. The only thing that has never returned was the Founders Packs, for a good reason. The Heirloom collection feels like a rehash of the Founders marketing in the present state of them game where it’s most likely not trying to stay afloat. FOMO has never existed in Warframe, and it shouldn’t be added now.

Don’t even get me started on that 10 year Accolade in the packs. Accolades have usually been for people who made a notable contribution to the game. Founders, Closed Beta testers, Creators. All of them have some sort of impact on the game be it keeping it afloat in the starting year or contributing to the Community. Now a shiny sticker can be added to any account for as low as $30. I’ve been playing the game for 8 years. I’m not a ‘10 year supporter’ yet. The wording itself insinuates that to supoort the game for a decade, you need to pay. That Accolade should have been something added automatically when your account turns 10 years old.

Overall I’m extremely disappointed bu the Heirloom marketing as it stands. Will I buy it down the road? Chances are high when I’m not bleeding for food with school going on, which is at the very end of the year right before it goes away cause I also give into FOMO. DE has adjusted their strategies before, and I hope they do so now. But this has already set a bad first impressions for any future Heirloom content.

Anyway, rant over on that. Sound panel was cool. Always cool to hear how specific sounds are made like Kullervo. The Heirloom debacle kinda soured my mood for a bit, so I focused more on studying my classes and then went shopping with my roommates.

Came back a little late to TennoLive, probably halfways thru the Soulframe demo. From what I saw I really like the whole concept and thematic. The little turtle guy is so cute. Excited to see more of its development and eventually play it.

The Warframe aspect I had more range of feelings. Whispers in the Wall looks really cool and I’m excited for exploring what the fuck Albrecht is doing. I love how its expanding Deimos more, instead of adding another island and button to navigation. It feels like it’ll require the New War to access, since its all based around the aesthetic of the Man in the Wall seen at the very end of the quest. I’m very interest in the human Loid (best design from Liger since Nezha Empyrean imo). I hope he gives more insight into the attitudes of the Orokin since he is 99% likely from before the Old War.

And… Warframe 1999. I got sucked into Warframe because of it’s unique spin on fantasy sci-fi. And throughout the 8 years I’ve played it’s stuck to its aethetic formula to a T. Seeing CRT monitors and Nokias along with Entrati designs, the modern sci-fi elements and callbacks to Dark Sector makes it feel out of place. Blasphemous almost. But, I’ve had this feeling before with Duviri. I had reservations as to whether Duviri would break the Warframe Universe as we knew it. But DE made the Paradox make sense, and the aethetic language of the world fits perfectly into the formula. I absolutely love Duviri. I need to see more and play 1999 in order to feel how it connects to the Origin System and Duviri as a whole, be it the very distant past (and being born in 99 myself makes me…. Haaaaa) or a parallel universe connected by Void Fuckery(tm). But seeing how Duviri played out I have no real doubts DE won’t pull it off again.

#i just needed to word vomit #warframe #tennocon 2023 #everything except for the heirloon packs was chefs kiss

[mori-mementoed]

my first shot at a comic (and posting art on tumblr in general)!

#grian #third life #hermitcraft #season 6 (demise) and season 7 shopping district #watcher grian #last life smp #i Do Not Like the second panel mmmmmm

[hwiyoungies]

“Don't you ever forget my worthless pride”

Jeonghan - Oikawa Tooru, Aobajohsai’s Captain

Seventeen x Haikyuu!! part 2/13

#svtcreations #svtgfx #lgbtqcaratsnet #seventeen #jeonghan #do i like the second panel? mmmmmm still don't know #but i guess i'm stuck with that format lmao #or not! maybe i'll just change everything i'm not forced to follow the same format but i'm duuuuuuuuuuumb #svt x haikyuu #b.edits

[thefact0rygirl]

Boba likes to watch you get dressed up for him because he knows he gets to take it off later, and it feels like such a tease

Mmmmmm with some lingerie that just so happens to match his green armor perfectly

18+ (fem!reader, reader dressed up in a skirt and lingerie)

Send me a NSFW headcanon and I’ll write a 5 sentence ficlet about it

The dark green material matches him perfectly. If you didn't know any better, it was like it was made for him. It was too good not to get it. And if you had any doubts about it before, the image of Boba speechless is worth every credit.

You don't need a sarcastic remark to shut him up, the second he sees you sweep into the room you know your credits were well spent. His eyes are wide, and he looks so much like a child ready to open presents on their birthday.

The long-line bra covers your breasts in dark green lace as silk straps crisscross around your waist and hips. The silk disappears under a matching skirt, a long, sheer panel in the back with a narrow sheer panel in the front.

The room is quiet, but you can still hear the cracking of Boba's composure as you give him a spin, the air catching under the skirt to give him a peak-a-book of your ass.

"What do you think, Boba?"

Each step you take towards him puts more of your legs on display. As you approach, he can see the faintness of your nipples through the lace. He's stammering, the sight of you wrapped up like a present making it difficult to think.

"I-I think we just had a change of plans."

#vee answers #anon #boba fett x reader #boba fett x you #boba fett fanfic #boba fett ficlet #ask game #5 sentence ficlet

[ayuki-ikuya]

I come bringing ideas and headcanons.

OK, so we all already know what The Three oldest archons abilities. So I’ve come up with my own ideas we could use for the younger archons! (And yes I’m grouping Ei, Venti and Zhongli as the older siblings since Ei Is 1000 years old Venti is 2,500 and Zhongli is 5,000-6,000 and the other archons are still in the hundreds I think)

Again these aren’t canon just stuff you can use for future Requests for Twisted wonderland x Teyvat God! Reader

For Dendro archon!Reader

Definitely a Bow User. And Is a Healer. But the their Ult can cause damage

I have a theory That during the Archon War The dendro Archin created the Regisvines to fight for them, and only two were left. I also Headcanon The dendro archon can bring plants to life and overwrite what each plant can do. (Maybe even bring mushrooms to life 👀).

Maybe They can create a giant plant from the ground that spreads Healing energies and since this is a god where talking about can Cure Curses (Ahem Vils Curses Ahem) and major Diseases and what not.

For Their Ult maybe a giant plant monster (kinda like how Gouba and Oz exists ) that will attack for them (could make for fun combos with different elements like if the dendro archon was wet Hydro Plant monster)

For Hydro archon!reader

Polearm or sword (theirs way too many Hydro Catalyst) Healer and Dps, Why? Cause I say so.

You’ve mentioned how Hydro archon summons a giant wave? I’ll do you one better and their E skill summons a giant sea creature of your choosing to soak the fighters (A cool visual is their polearm turning into a big dream catcher then going swoosh and Baam Maybe like A giant Water Koi fish finna drown your ass *ahem ace ahem*)

Now mihoyo likes to reference Their character form honkai impact into genshin impact (and since they took a characters look from Honkai and another characters abilities with the whole Dual ego thing for Raiden shogun and Ei) I’m gonna base this Ultimate Skill From a character from Honkai (for research search up Herrsercher of Sentience)

Since the Hydro archons whole thing is about Justice. Now here me out here. WATER WHIP. Just a giant whip of water that can go on for miles (maybe it’s salty maybe it’s like fresh water depends on our readers mood lolol). Like, It’s whip of water strong enough to cut diamond or whatever it would be very cool (Kalim would wanna see if he could do something like that with his UM Que jamil trying to stop him)

Maybe their hair turns into water too.

Pyro archon! Reader

Claymore. A Big strong war god needs a big strong weapon. Dps and Defense.

Now It’s not just one claymore, It’s DUAL-CLAYMORE, why? Cause it’s a war god that’s why!

I like to think the shield is like Xinyans and XiangLings combined and it’s constantly sending off tiny Fire Discs. Or just symbols shooting fire like what the Pyro Abyss mages can do

For Ultimate I like to think it’s like Childes Daggers but Bigger and on fire just a huge sword made of fire.

The pyro archon doesn’t think just BURNS. and STABE

Cryo archon! Reader

I can’t really come up with much for Cryo archon. But maybe a Catalyst that can summon a giant blizzard that drops down giant ice swords (kinda like Ganyus)

Definitely a sub DPS.

Maybe a healer too since The Tsaritsa is The archon of love?

What do you think about these abilities? Since you mentioned that the students and staff would assume their just strong mages I tried to be very creative with these abilities.

Also how I think the lore could go is maybe somewhere after leonas overblot and before azuls, Crowly has found a way to send Yuu home reluctantly. Yuu, grim and the aduece duo, and maybe some of heartslaybul or savana claw whoever you want come with them to the office to send them home. But Yuu is contemplating whether or not they WANT to go home now. But something goes wrong, maybe grim messes up the spell for the portal to work becuase (although he doesn’t want to admit it ) doesn’t want Yuu leaving, and their greeted with a surprise guest. Now this gives Yuu time to decide if they genuinely wanna go home and when teh archon finally has the materials they need to create a portal Yuu will tell them to leave the portal open (maybe put it into a tiny pocket mirror like the how we have the teapot) because they wanna stay for a little while or just until grim graduates (Que a happy fire cat ) and the archon whose grown attached to some people here was like ok “let our friends visit whenever they want, only if their headmaster allows it”

Now onto the headcanons

Anemo Archon! Reader and Mondstadt! Yuu

Everyone expected a lot of things not a person with Green eyes and (H/C) hair with green highlights. And an odd thing about them was the glowing stone on their person, Yuu didn’t have that?

Everyone’s freaking out because they’ve accidentaly taken another person from Yuus world.

And since Venti Is a well known famous bard In teyvat let’s say or Dear (y/N) is also a known bard and is not at all freaking out about what’s going on in fact let’s say our dear reader recognizes Yuu! And so now (Y/N) is now a new student (and a new headache for Crowley) in the ramshackle dorm! Yup! Just an ordinary human bard, Ehe~.

I’ll leave the rest of this up to you, Where Yuu has to explain what the world of teyvat is like (and why Yuu doesn’t have a phone (and a vision) because Twisted wonderland is far more advance in Technology and teyvat has JUST invented the Camera)

Also I head canon that people with Visions can summon their weapons and object with their visions, ok? Ok. To make things make more sense when reader pulls out a lyre from floating glitter.

Geo archon!reader and Liyue! Yuu

Same things happend here, but hey! We’ve summoned a Funeral Consultant! A very (ahemATTRACTIVEahem) Wise funeral consultant at best!

Our dear Friend (y/n) is very calm about the situation as well. After all everyone and liyue knows their god was killed and The Adepti are watching over them

So Our dear reader is seeing this as a free vacation 😊

Electro Archon!Reader and Inazuma!yuu

Since the god of Inazuma isn’t “Dead” or hasn’t left and the people know what their beloved archon looks like, Yuu will definitely Be Freaking the fuck out

“YOU DIDNT BRING ME HOME YOU JUST SUMMONED MY PEOPLES FUCKING GOD OH SHIT”

insert the meme of the womens face that gets zoomed in on the second panel “the. WHAT.” 😃

And y’know how Eis “Hello” voice line where she makes the traveler her guard she says the same thing to Yuu except “I recognize you are one of my people as your archon I shall be your guard and keep you safe from any danger in this Foreign world” and let’s say The puppet will not be used and Reader will be in control becuase they don’t have to worry about erosion right now so the puppet will be resting while (Y/N) is in control protecting their Precious Inazuma citizen is ok.

Well until They can get the materials they need to open a portal. I’ll let you figure out the rest, but congrats ramshackle you now have a god in your abode 😃✨

-Plot Anon 💗

PLOT ANON-SAMAAAAAAAAAA ILY!!!!!!!!! Thank you for your hard work sob

Anyways, for skills of the archons-

Dendro Archon

I think they'd use a sword or a catalyst tbh, if the skills you listed, it makes a little more sense to have them be more of a catalyst

For their elemental skill, I think they'd summon/throw something similar to Klee's and Aloy's elemental skill except they heal if someone in your party is nearby, their healing could scale by their EM or ER.

For their burst, I like your head canon for the Dendro Archon, so I might go off from that and your idea for their burst, just more tweaking. The dendro archon would be able to summon a large plant that heals AND deals Dendro damage by sapping mobs hp. The amount of life sapping it does and the healing would scale off their original HP (artifacts that give hp won't be of use)

Hydro Archon

I agree with hydro polearm or sword. Too many catalysts

Mmm... To be honest, I think you should have the burst be her skill... The whip idea is intriguing, but I think it would work more for a skill which can allow them to use it several times before waiting for the CD to go down. I think the whip skill would work better with Crit as well.

AND AS FOR THE MENTIONS OF WAVE AND A SEA CREATURE, I'LL DO YOU ONE BETTER BUT FOR THEIR BURST!!!! They summon a large tsunami which takes form of a monster/animal and lunges at the mobs (similar to Zhongli tossing down a dumbbell), however the amount of damage the burst can do is depending on if they are afflicted by the wet status the mobs are afflicted by. If already afflicted with hydro, the mobs would receive double damage while those with other elements afflicted on them would receive the element combination DMG and normal DMG while those that aren't affected by an element, they would receive normal damage. The amount of damage the burst does is scaled by EM.

Pyro Archon

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA CLAYMORE

Hmmm.... I think the skill would be they set an AoE with magma, mobs will receive damage from it and will continue to receive damage if they stay on it, but those who are in party, they will receive an ATK boost that scales from HP.

For the burst, I think I'll use a character from Honkai Impact with their special move which is Murata Himeko in Vermilion Knight: Eclipse battlesuit. Pyro Archon uses their claymore and another claymore but made of pyro and is far more larger and their cut scene has the Archon raise the pyro claymore above their head and slam it down to send pyro erupting from the ground (similar to the pyro axe wielding hilichurls)

Cryo Archon

I agree with catalyst

Mmmmmm.... I'd say her skill would beeeeee... Trapping several mobs or so in ice. They can either do 2-4 ice traps depending if you got their c1. (The ice traps are similar to Mirror Maidens traps BTW but it deals or affects the mobs with cryo)

For burst, I like the idea of summoning a blizzard/swords, but it's similar to Ganyu's. SO I'LL DO YOU ONE BETTER!!!! Cryo Archon will summon a blizzard which freezes mobs without having to use hydro, the freeze status lasts for a total of 15 seconds or higher if you got their c3

Hmmm... I like the idea, but imma tweak it a bit. The archon was in fact summoned through that portal because Grim decided to mess it up just for Yuu to stay a little longer, and so the Archon now resides in Twisted Wonderland as well in order to aide them until they can return back to their world. That way it makes more sense and makes it more fun.

Anemo archon

Yuu would be a bit jealous about them because they got a vision.

Crowley needs to hide his money

Sam has been strictly told to not give them wine that Sam stores in his shop...

Vargus is conflicted about them because they legit float without magic

Trein recurved a major headache

Divus is praying to whatever god existing to take them back

Ehe

EHE TE NANDAYO!?

Geo Archon

Yuu feels awkward meeting the consultant of the funeral parlor having to meet the Director...

Crowley is praying for dear god for them to go away.

"STOP TAKING MY MONEY YOU GORGEOUS FIEND" - Crowley

Train + Crewel + You = Besties

Sam was literally threatened to not joke around with you with business.

You legit did not fuck around with people when in contracts.

"Osmanthus wi-"

"SHUT THE HELL UP" - everyone

Electro Archon

Yuu is literally terrified in "your" presence.

Shogun malfunctioned due to being in an entirely new world so you had to disable Shogun's rules and create new ones regarding this world.

Yuu is still unaware of Shogun being a puppet

Crowley is no longer safe.

The staff (specifically Crewel) is supporting Shogun/You to beat Crowley's ass into shape.

Only the Diasomnia dorm knows your predicament with you and your puppet(s).

You are the definition of Queen/King/Royalty of the school. If you search up NRC, your picture literally plastered on it as the definition.

#twisted wonderland #genshin impact #twisted wonderland x genshin impact #archons #NRC

[mandos-sluts]

Ending 3: She’s Coming with Me

Wordcount: 1.7k

Warnings: Smut, rough sex, blow job, dirty talk

Summary:  Fed up with your creepy boss, Mando convinces you to be his permanent mechanic

Story beginning

Ending 1 and Ending 2

The next day, you’re working on some wires below the ship and hear footsteps approaching.

“I just have to rewire the calcinator and then I’ll be done.” You call out.

“Come with me.” You hear Mando’s modulated voice say.

“Huh?” You slide out from under the ship to see Mando standing directly above you.

“Come with me.” He repeats. “I could use a permanent mechanic.”

You stand up. “I’m content with my current job.” You state, looking back at the wires you were working on.

“I have the credits to pay you well.” He says in an assertive tone. He’s standing about a foot away from you.

Honestly, traveling around the galaxy with a Mandalorian bounty hunter sounds kind of exciting, and you could use a change of scenery. While this job does pay fairly well, it is the same thing every day. And your boss is the absolute worst; he’s a middle-aged creep who specializes in sexually harassing his female employees and taking more than his fair share of your payments.

Still, it’s a stable job and you have built a good reputation for yourself. You cross your arms. “It’ll take you more than that to convince me, I have many loyal customers that pay well.”

“I can offer you much more than they can, pretty girl.” Mando says inching closer to you. Pretty girl. These words go straight to your cunt.

“Is that so?” You say nervously.

Mando lightly pushes you against the outside of his ship. “Why don’t I show you.” He says moving his hand to the hem of your pants. You look down at his hands as he unbuttons your pants. “Tell me to stop and I will.” He says softly.

Your heart is pounding and you look back up at him. You feel his hand slip under your wet panties and he runs his gloved finger in your folds. He then abruptly shoves his digit into you and begins pumping it fast. Your mouth falls open at sudden penetration. “...ahhhhh.” You squeal in a high-pitched and breathy voice.

“Come on, baby girl, don’t make me beg.” Mando says, leaning his helmet against your forehead.

He continues to ram his finger in and out of you. Your back is flat against the ship and your hands down by your side. Mando’s other hand is next to your head with his palm against the metal wall.

“I– ”

“What the fuck is this!” You hear a voice yell. You peel your eyes away from Mando’s visor and see your boss walking angrily into your station.

“Mr. Calican!” You gasp as your heart drops. Mando casually turns his head behind him to look at your boss. He stops pumping his fingers but keeps his hands where they are, acting as if he couldn’t care less that someone has walked in on him fingering you.

You urgently pull Mando’s hands out of your pants and button them back up. Panic and shame are written all over your face.

“What the fuck is going on!!!? Is this how you’re accepting payment for your work!? You fuckin skank!” Your boss screams at you. “Get the fuck over here!” He yells pointing to the ground.

You instinctively take a step forward, headed to your boss when Mando grabs your arm. “She’s coming with me.” He states firmly.

“Who the fuck are you?” Your boss spits out. “You’re not taking that bitch anywhere!”

“Talk to her like that again and you’ll be sorry.” Mando says as he puts his hands on your waist and motions you to the open ramp of the ship.

“Hey! You need to pay for your repairs!” Your boss shouts as the two of you walk up the ramp.

“I already have. It's all going to her.” Mando says, looking back.

“What! No! Gimme my cut!!” He yells.

The Mandalorian stands in the doorway. “Congratulations on losing your most talented mechanic, asshole.” He says as the hatch closes, leaving your boss standing there fuming.

********************************

The first thing you do on the Crest is take a shower. You replay the situation that just transpired over and over again in your head: Mando fingering you against the ship, Mando telling your boss to fuck off. Fuck, you are so fucking horny. You step out of the shower, so turned on and desperate for the same kind of attention that Mando had given you earlier.

“Hey.” You say walking into the cockpit.

“Hello.” Mando says turning his head to the side, not looking all the way back at you.

“So I wanted to say thank you for this opportunity.” You say walking toward his chair. You lean on the control panel beside him and stare directly into his visor. You’re wearing a thin tank top that your nipples are poking through and short shorts. He looks you up and down. Your smooth skin is beautiful, and he can smell your enticing scent through his helmet.

“Of course.” He says, turning his head back to look out the ship’s front window.

“And I just wanted to show you how grateful I am that you saved me from that skug hole.” You say bringing your hand to his thigh. You slowly lower yourself to your knees.

“Sweetheart, you don’t have to do that.” Mando says, lightly grabbing your arm.

“I know.” You return as you run your hand up his thigh. “But the ship doesn’t need any maintenance right now, so what else am I supposed to do?” You say in a sultry manner.

You maneuver yourself between Mando’s legs; a tent has already formed in his pants. You unbutton his trousers and release his enormous cock. You exhale loudly at the sight of it.

You bring your lips to his groin and slowly lick his shaft up and down.

“Fuck.” Mando says under his breath. “What a good fuckin girl you are.” You take the tip in your mouth and swirl the head of his member with your tongue. Mando’s eyes are glued to you as you wrap your lips around his cock. He sets one of his hands on your head.

You lower yourself on his dick and put as much of his length in your mouth as you can. With one hand on his thigh and the other wrapped around the bottom of his cock, you begin moving your head up and down.

He lets out a deep modulated growl. He lies his head back so that it’s resting on his chair and closes his eyes. *see gif* “I wanted to shove my cock in that pretty little mouth of yours the second I saw you.” He says.

You moan out at his words and close your eyes. Your pussy is pulsing and you can feel that your panties are soaking wet. You move your hand from his thigh down to your cunt and begin circling your clit. The pleasure prompts you to bob your head even faster.

Mando grunts at this and looks back down at you. “Fuck!” He spits out. “Are you fingering yourself?!” Your eyes shoot open and look directly at his visor. “You’re gonna be such a good live-in cockslut for me, aren’t you?” He says, tightening his grip on your hair ever so slightly. “Pfftt. Sucking my cock while I’m piloting the ship... Finger yourself harder you needy little thing.” He commands. You start circling your clit faster and harder and your eyes fall closed again. You let out a series of high-pitched and muffled “mmmmmm!”

“Can’t wait to have your tight little pussy wrapped around my cock.” Mando says as his breathing picks up.

You remove your hand from the base of his length and take even more of his cock into your mouth, gagging as you try to open your throat.

“Look at me.” Mando orders in a deep stern voice. “I want you to look at me while you choke on my cock.” You open your eyes and tears start forming in the corners of them.

“Can’t believe you’re mine to fuck whenever I want. You’re so– uhhhhhh– so fuckin perfect, fuck.”

All of the sudden you hear something beep. A hologram of Greef Karga appears on the dashboard in front of Mando. He can only see the top half of Mando’s body through the hologram on his end.

“Mando.” Greef says.

“Greef. What– what is it?” Mando returns.

“There’s a bounty on Tatooine that needs to be collected as soon as possible. Can you take the job? The payout is high.”

You continue bobbing your head and start to suck a little bit harder. You can feel his cock getting stiffer. You move one your free hand to grab his balls. Mando flinches.

“Sh– sure.” He stutters.

“Great. I’ll send you their coordinates and information.” Greef says.

Mando glances down and thrusts his hips up while holding your head in place. You gag as your nose hits his stomach, trying your best to breathe through your nose. Spit is dripping from your chin onto the floor by your knees.

“Are you alright–”

“Yes.” He returns quickly and turns off the hologram. Greef’s projected figure disappears from the control panel as you feel hot juices fill your mouth and spew down your throat. “Fuuuccckkkkk.” Mando moans out as his breathing slows down.

You slide his cock out of your mouth and take a deep breath.

“Open your mouth.” He says as he lazily grabs your chin. “I wanna see your mouth coated in my cum.” You open your mouth and stick out your tongue while batting your eyes. Your tongue is covered in his sperm.

Mando traces your bottom lip with his finger, gathering the cum and spit that are dripping off of it. He sticks the digit in your mouth.

“You’d better get used to getting filled with my load, pretty girl.” Mando purrs.

#the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian smut #the mandalorian fanfiction #star wars smut #mando x reader #pedro pascal smut #mandalorian smut #star wars fanfiction #din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin smut #star wars x y/n #star wars x you #star wars x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #mando x you

[ladylynse]

Hello Le Fantôme here *waves*. You're welcome, although I'm not sure if that helps or not. Mmmmmm.... I mean, kinda? In the end it all will depends on how you feel it going for, if that made sense. Personally, I'd go with Cataclysm just for the funnies XD XD (I'm evil XD XD not... much, I just imaging Danny's face at that moment and his even more 'can't believe what I'm seeming' when the magic does bring the map back to normal as it nothing had happened. Maybe even make him wish he could do something like that back home, so no destruction). Oh and the fact that Adrien leaves was easy to know and understand that he is feeding Plagg, but of course that bit isn't easy to know for Danny. That was a good point there. Then keyboard talking, I believe that you could be right on the phones, specially if that phone has multi language feature. But on pc/laptop would depend if you have as well the international keyboard system active. I think that's how is call... I could be totally wrong, I did that very long but long time ago. I do speak Spanish too and I have my keyboard that allows me to type á,é,í,ó,ú... and ô? oh! it worked O.O O.O I really didn't know I could type that o just by shift 6^ plus o. And for those vowels I just type ' plus the vowel.... Of course, playing around with the alt plus numbers is something else. And fun, just you know the numbers don't need to be the ones from the number panel, if I not mistaken. I don't know if that helps, hopefully does. My laptop says in the language options: Spanish (Peru) United States-International keyboard. And have the "logo" on the bar as ESP INTIL. I think that's in the keyboard settings. I really hope any of that helps even a little and didn't end being so confusing. I apologise if it is confusing ^^; ^^;

(re: this ask)

Cataclysm has been my preference most recently; glad you think it's a good option! Because, yes, as you say, when this gets fixed? And the complete lack of dust materializes into a map in his hands after a swarm of ladybugs flies by in a swirl of magic? He'd have that moment of 'what.' and then the sort of mental shrug because this is weird, but it's not weirder than some of the other stuff he's seen. *grins*

Re: the keyboard: it makes sense!

I can turn the international keyboard thing back on; my computer came with French and just a general international one installed with English, and I had to turn off the ability to switch languages because I kept doing it by mistake (can't remember how now) and all of a sudden what I was trying to type wasn't what was showing up and how did I wreck that and how do I fixed it.

Sadly, your little trick doesn't work on the English keyboard--I tried--so switching languages remains an option if I can find one that's not too different. (I think the apostrophe or something common is in a different spot on the French keyboard. I'm not sure if I ever found where the apostrophe was moved to; I admittedly never looked that hard.)

I suppose, if I write in word, I can just do the 'insert symbol' option, but that's not faster than copying and pasting. I may just end up with a string of the symbol along the bottom of the document as I type, along with the é for whenever I type Chloé's name, and a few other common ones for the bit I use French words for things. Or I go back to copying and pasting.

Honestly, at this point, it's future-Lynse's problem, one of those bridges I cross when I come to them. It's something I've run into for almost every ML fic I've written because I've been through so many different computers over the years. (Like...5? When a normal person would be limping pretty severely along with one or caved and been on their second in the same time period? To be fair I'm counting the one I bought that didn't work straight out of the box and then I had to send the replacement away because it completely broke down while under warranty...and then again about a year after it had ended. I swear there's something about me that just makes laptops die or stop something convenient from working. Like those people who can't wear watches because they will stop. My brother in law experienced this firsthand when I gave him an old laptop of mine that just flat out refused to connect to wifi, even with an external internet dongle thing, (second one of mine that did that, neither of which I ever got functioning reliably) and he took it home and it worked fine for him, but the next time I was in the same room as that computer, it stopped working. Wouldn't acknowledge that wifi was even an option, which is what it was doing to me from months before randomly working for an hour or two days or a week and then just. Not.)

#ladylynse #asks

[taesbetch]

01 | Creatures Of The Night

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut: Vampire!AU

Summary: Creatures of the night, Soul mates, a war between species. You had thought all these things were nothing but folktales. But as the world hidden in plain sight crashes into your day to day life you struggle to keep up. Going from being hunted to the leader of a vampire groups mate, your world is turned upside down and the fight to survive is on. 

Word Count: 3.8k

Next

The sun shone directly in your eyes as you watched you family drive off into the distance. Though the heat lay a blanket of warmth around your skin your heartfelt cold as you relived your mothers final words.

"Try not to call us"

Wow. How absolutely fantastic. Standing outside of your home you sighed. You had 10 days to find a new place and figure out how to survive on your own. Your so-called parental protector had found a new boyfriend, one who had flipped your world upside down. Letting out a noise of frustration you dragged your feet back into your now-empty home. Deciding on a nap.

---

The same feeling as the one prior seeped in as you sat in your classroom, the sun blaring through the glass window. You looked towards the clock, trying to think of an idea but nothing particular came to mind. Watching it tick by slowly you remembered that your mum's boyfriend buried around 20,000 dollars in the forest for the so-called apocalypse. Smiling softly you felt a weight lift off your shoulders, there's no way they remembered to dig it up. It had to still be there. Zoning back into reality your ears adjusted to the girl in front of you, her eyes fixed on you.

"Hey did you hear me!" the girl said snapping in front of your face. 

"Sorry, i missed it” you stated, pushing your current issue to the back of your mind.

"They said to stay clear of the forest, 4 girls dead, they say by a mountain lion due to the bite marks but I find that incredibly weird considering we don't get mountain lions, Reya what do you think?" the girl asked Reya who was staring out the window obviously not paying attention as well. 

You’ve known Reya since before you could even remember. Though the two of you were best friends, Reyes mind was always a hard one too read and it often felt like the gurl held multiple secrets. 

"I think that it's the mountain lions," she said turning towards us. Your heart skipped a beat as her eyes bored into your soul almost as if your thoughts had been spoken out loud.  "So don't go into the forest," she said sternly as the bell rang.

As the class got up packing up with the rest of the class, you continued to look at Reya in shock as her eyes kept burning into yours. Can she read minds?

"Maybe" she said getting up with a shrug. You almost gasped as your eyes followed her movements. 

"Sorry what??" you asked getting up too. You pushed past people in order to catch up with Reya. Just as you both exited the classroom she answered. 

 "I said maybe, as in maybe its mountain lions, no one can be sure though," she said smiling widely before leaving the classroom.

Quickly making your way home you looked up to the sky noticing how quickly the sun was setting. It is winter...You picked up your pace knowing you wouldn't have a lot of time to find the money.  lion smion, there's nothing out there...but still you wanted to be cautious. 

After gathering your things and changing your clothes you quickly walked towards the entrance of the forest. The travel seemed like a lifetime even though it was only located 15 minutes from your house. 

As you got there you looked up at the trees and back towards the city.  You always found it strange how there was just the city and then bam a forest but You’ve never questioned it, and to be honest, no one has needed to. Taking a deep breath you looked at the shovel you stole from your next-door neighbour and began your search. 

remembering that he has said be buried it near a large tree with a knifed X into it. 

As you kept walking the sky started getting darker and the air was getting cooler. The trees seemed to glimmer underneath the moon but there was something spooky about this forest. Before you could take another step you heard rustling in the distance. Crap. You probably should’ve left a lot earlier. 

Your head snapped into the direction of the noise. Was that the mountain lion? Your eyes scanned the empty area as your heartbeat sped up."Hello," you called but it came out more like a terrified wheeze.

 "Well, what do we have here?" 

Once again your head snapped into the direction of the noise. shocked that it was a voice and not a growl.  Your hand came up to your heart, almost like an instinct. As your eyes adjusted your body almost feinted from the amount of work it was doing. With your heartbeat finally leaving your ears your eyes managed to make out a figure in the dark. You could see it was a man and you could make out some of his features but not all of them.

"Oh. Hi you scared me" you said sighing in relief, 

"Oh sweetie he hasn't scared you just yet," another male said gasping once again you turned. this man was a little closer than the other one and you perfectly make out his outfit but as he stood in front of the moon his face was a little hidden. 

"Mmmmmm type O jungkook's favourite. Maybe we should bring her back to him?" another said popping out from the right. Three males. in the middle of the forest. in the middle of the night. You froze as your heart dropped the feeling of unsettlement kicking in. 

"Guys....can you smell that? What rank is it? An ultimate?" another one said as his head turned in different directions. "fuck. We should go" the first one said angrily as they all sighed in frustration.

"I thought they were extinct what the hell," another one said before turning around and disappearing in the shadows. You watched in relief as they all disappeared except one. 

"we'll see you again human" he winked at me before disappearing with the rest of his group.

You blinked a couple of times, your body frozen in place as the wind began blowing harsher against your skin.  What just happened?

"Oi you idiot"

You turned around, this time without fear as the familiar voice interrupted you.  Reya. standing there with her arms crossed angrily she walked forward as your eyes connected. Were people just out in the forest constantly? Is there an event you didn't know about?

"I said not to go into the forest," she said grabbing my arm angrily. “Is this for your mum's boyfriends money? Gosh. is it really worth it ?” she said as she started dragging you back in the direction you came.

I pulled my arm away from hers and stood my ground as she looked at me confused "...They left" you blurted. 

“what do you mean they left?” She asked, her eyes softening. You sighed, a cloud exiting your mouth as the cool air had suddenly become colder.

“Mum. She left with that bitch of a boyfriend. I said i wanted to finish high school here so left. And gave me nothing. I’m losing the house in 10 days Reya. I didn't know what else to do...” You explained. 

Reya stood quietly. she looked at the ground before placing her hands on her hips. 

“so instead of coming to me, you decide the best idea is too rummage through the forest at night?” She asked, her tone soft yet intense. 

“well...I know...We’ve been friends for the longest time, but I’ve never been to your house. I haven't met your mum i jus...I didn't want to intrude. You clearly have stuff going on in your private home life Reya.” You said. 

Reya bite her lip before hugging you tightly. 

“You idiot. I know i have a lot going on. and honestly, I'm sorry that i haven't invited you into this part of my life before its just that its-...well a lot. But my home is ALWAYS open to you y/n. Your my best friend for god's sake” She exclaimed. as she released you from her grip she grabs your hand. 

“You're coming to live with me. You can’t say no” She smiled. 

“Only if your sure...because I’m going to feel hella bad if I’m an inconvenience to you...Do you have room for me?” You asked, your free hand coming to the back of your neck nervously. 

Renya let out a small laugh as she looked at you excitedly. 

“Trust me. We have room.” 

------

Standing in front of a beautiful mansion, your jaw hit the ground. the driveway was lined with small trees guiding the way to the beautiful house. The wood coloured panels and sleek black colour scheme had you drooling a little bit. 

“Yeah, You definitely have room” You whispered, still in shock. 

Walking in the house you gawked at the interior the living room area that connected to the kitchen was gorgeous, to the left a glass wall let you see out to the city. You didn't even realise the house sat above the city until now. 

 "Remee are you rich?" You asked her, still in awe at her big ass place. 

"I guess you could say that. Follow me ill show you to your room!" she said running up these beautiful gold plated stairs. 

"Is this why no one has ever come to your house? Cause you're worried they'll steal something?" you asked following her through the second floor.

She laughed as she opened up a door to a room. 

 "no, I'm not that paranoid. Here's your room. We’ll grab your stuff tomorrow but it's currently 11pm and we’ve got school tomorrow” She said the pain in her eyes when the word school came up very evident. 

“Yikes did you say 11pm?” You asked in shock. The time had really slipped by. 

“I know, kinda crazy. I'll give you a tour of the place tomorrow! The bathroom is through that door there and don't worry ill come get you in the morning. Just rest up and don't worry about your living situation any more. I've got you.” Reya smiled. 

“Thank you...really” You stated. 

as Reya left your new room with a goodbye you took a deep breath. Looking around at your beige and white schemed room you smiled softly. 

You could get used to this. 

However, as you let yourself drift to sleep. Red eyes stared from a tree in the distance and a target had been unknowingly placed on your back. 

-----------------------

Sis, Wake up!”

 You fluttered your eyes open slowly, bright light started invading them causing me to squint. “10 more minutes” you groan as you rolled back under the silky sheets.

“I've been trying to wake you up forever. It's like you were dead!”  Renya said hitting me with pillows.

 “Remee please don’t make me get up, this has been the best sleep of my life” You whined as you tried to fall back into my peaceful slumber. Reya chucked a uniform on the bed hitting you one last time. 

“Well, you can have another great nights sleep when we come back after school. Sis, please don't make me try and convince you to go. I already wanna ditch,” she said happily. 

“ugh, We have to go...” You replied as you attempted to move your body. Keyword...attempting. 

“Now get up you lazy bum! We have to go to school!” she said before exiting my room. You groaned before throwing the sheets off your body, staring at the ceiling. Hearing birds chirp you let yourself have another minute before you threw yourself out of bed. 

---

The class was rioting as the day had just begun. The teacher hadn't arrived to class yet so as the paper was being tossed around and gossip was being spread you took the opportunity too  Finally, the doors handle starts to riggle, The classic old door playing up again. But just by the wiggle, the class knew who it was. 

Everything seemed to stop before everyone rushed towards their seats picking up any rubbish that was in the way and throwing it in the bin, Reya, who was on the other side of the class started jumping over desks just to get to her seat in time. Just as everyone was seated and was acting ‘normal’ the door slide open.

“Class A year 12. You have new students.” She said before entering in, as she walked in the faces coming in behind her looked so familiar it was scary, the seven boys standing in front of the class were so good looking some girls were actually drooling. One of the boys caught my eye, his dark hair and emo aura intrigued you, he caught me staring and smirked before looking next to me to Renya. blushing hardcore you ignored the tense state of your friend. 

As they introduced themselves you watched as Reya nervously played with her fingers, you creased my brows in confusion as she looked at you. Something was clearly bothering her. She tried to smile at you in reassurance but it didn’t work out very well.

“Class would someone please show the boys around before chapel starts,” miss asked, as soon as she said that all the girls in the class shot their hands up except you and Reya. You tried your best to read her but it wasn't working very well. 

“We want her to,” 

Jin, the boy who looked like the oldest one pointed at you. Shouldn't they be in different year levels?

Everyone’s eyes clicked to me, some girls glared at the back of your head as you slowly got up. “Follow me,” You said softly ignoring how all seven boys stared at you as if you were prey. 

walking through the hallways you could hear the boys whispering behind you. The hair stood up on the back of your neck as you pointed to different rooms. explaining what the are. 

 “and this is the spare classroom, we mostly use in for dance class as there aren’t any desks here, and the walls are soundproof,” You explained opening the door and letting them look in.

 “Can you take us inside?” jimin asked as the started to block your exit. “Yer I guess I can,” you said as your heart started beating faster. 

Leading them, you walked them in. 

“so yer it’s a pretty decent roo-“ You started but as soon as you heard the slam of the door closing and the click of the lock, you whipped around faster than you could say ‘what the fuck’. 

The boys all started spreading around the room except Jin who stood at the door with a big as the smirk on his face.

 “Erm…is something wrong?” you asked gulping the saliva that was gathering in your mouth out of nervousness.

“Mmmmmm yes something is a very wrong young one,” Namjoon said as he rested his body against the wall sighing “see, you saw some of us in the forest last night, remember that?” Yoongi asked as he gave a faint smirk.

“Oh…that was you guys? Why were you in the forest? And why is it a problem that I saw you?” you asked in confusion, why are they making such a big deal out of it.

“mmmmmm, maybe she didn’t…’see’ us” taehyung said putting focus on the word see as he scratched his head and looked off into the distance

 “doesn’t matter…I’m hungry,” jungkook said as he stepped closer and closer towards you.

your heart skipped a beat as his piercing gaze looked straight into my soul. A smirk came onto his face before he closed his eyes and took a whiff. 

“My favourite,” he said before opening his eyes, the red of his eyes matched the colour of deep blood. As he smiled at you two fangs diverted your eyes to them causing you to freeze momentarily. 

Gasping you backed up against a wall, He laughed at my obvious fear as the rest of them smirked waiting for the scene to unfold. 

“Do you know what we are?” he asked the word right on the tip of my tongue.

“Y-y-you’re a-a vampire” you whimpered as you clutched the edge of my shirt. 

“See guys! now she knows about us! do you know what happens to humans that find out about us?” he smirked coming closer to you. 

 “I don’t really wanna know to be honest” you whimpered again, looking around for some sort of exit but there was no point, his ‘posse’ had the place surrounded. 

“It doesn’t matter anyway, you’re about to find out” he smirked, opening his mouth wider as his hand held my neck tightly. breathing in you were ready to let out a scream but the front door was pulled open.

Everyone stopped, jungkook’s fangs and eyes disappeared as Reya stood at the doorway. you had never been more grateful to see her in your life than at this moment right now.

 “There you are, why are you guys in here? Shouldn’t your tour be done?” Reya asked, the door still wide open, wasn’t that locked?

You shuffled your feet to move out but jungkook who was in front of you, growled softly under his breath. 

“Y/N, let’s go,” Reya said motioning out the door quickly.

 “What about us? You can’t just leave us alone” taehyung pouted as he swiftly grabbed her hand. Your heart skipped a beat for a second, we need to both get the fuck out of here.

“You’re old enough, I’m sure you can find your way,” she said coldly as she snatched her hand back from his grip. 

“If you want your friend you’re going to have to come in and get her” jungkook said as he gripped my arm tightly pulling me into his rock hard body.

Trying to communicate with her through your eyes you watched in fear as she rolled her eyes her temper clearly boiling.

 “Well?” taehyung asked as everyone looked on. ,s if what was happening was a game. Reya took a breath before walking in straight towards where you were.

Taehyung smiled and slammed the door shut as some of the boys started laughing.

 “not a smart move” jungkook chuckled before his fangs reappeared.

Waiting for an ear-piercing screech you watch on worriedly but your eyes narrowed at the relaxed girl. 

 I started struggling against his grip as Reya walked closer.

“I only like saying things once, so listen closely. You WILL leave her alone, I’ll let you roam around, but if I see one bite mark on her unscarred skin, or one student in this god damn school dead, I will kill you, now let her go” Reya stated, authority laced in her voice.

Jungkook and his companions laughed as he brought you in front of him, holding you still with one arm and removing your hair in front of your neck with the other.

“And what are you, a low power witch, going to do to stop me” he smirked as he brought his fangs closer to my neck.

Tears strolled down my face as you prepared yourself for the pain...

“Remember what I told you,” she said staring him down.

Before his teeth could puncture your neck, his hands dropped from your body and went straight to his head, he screamed loudly, dropping towards the floor. Jin and Suga ran straight too him. Looking at him confused.

“I wouldn’t exactly call me, low rated,” she said grabbing your arm and pulling you towards her. Confused, you continued to stare at the group of vampires. 

“Remee, stop please” you whispered tugging on her sleeve, looking down at the pained boy. She glanced at you confused before stopping whatever she was doing.

As jungkook regained himself he glared up at the two of you. scooting a little closer to Remee you tried not to be as scared as they all circled us shooting daggers into our backs.

“so what are you, middle rate? You don’t smell like an ultimate witch” rap monster asked as he examined her. 

“I don’t know, are you willing to find out,” she said glaring at all of them. the tension could be cut with a knife. Your friend was so confident and so unfazed by the blood-sucking boys. 

“Now let us go,” she said turning to jimin who was blocking up from the door. When jimin didn’t move she sighed and with a flick of her hand jimin was flung across the room. As he groaned you watched as some of the boys moved away from Reya. 

“One time everybody, one time,” she said as she led you out of the room.

As Remee dragged you down the corridors you head was spun. The situation not settling well with you. 

 “Remee, what the fuck just happened, their…and you’re…and what the hell!?” I exclaimed clutching my head with my free hand. 

“I’ll explain once we get back to my house,” she said as we exiting school “were ditching?” you asked, Your brain lowkey breaking down at the knowledge that these mythical creatures were real. 

“Yer well I think this situation calls for ditching ya know?” she said as the two of you left school. You tightened your grip on your friend's hand as you knew without her guidance your body wouldn't know how to act. The memory of those red eyes and white fangs burned in your brain as you walked...

What now? Are they going to be after you? 

You looked at Reya who still looked calm and composed and something about it calmed you down. 

You would be okay...hopefully. 

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[ununniliad]

Burst Beetle Tweseveny #7: “2007: The Translation of Desire and the Satisfaction of the Fire!”

 Content warning: Unreality, second-person narration.

<<<*>>>

     Tweseveny reaches out to one of the narrative threads, the one that

     tastes like Time-Waster Lad, and starts reading...

"...so yeah," says Mother Time. "We usually freeze time in some restaurant and steal the plates right off of people's tables. Man do they kick up a fuss! But by then we're gone."

Time-Waster Lad smiles and nods, pulling a pan out of the oven and setting it on the rack. He's dabbled in cooking before, usually making some monstrosity out of whatever could be pulled out of the back of the freezer, tossed together and heated until done. But this time, he's keeping it simple - flatbread, barbecue sauce, cheese, pizza. No matter how strong the itch to dive deep into the cupboards and try all the spices one at a time is. "I've never tried that. I guess I should some time, mwahaha." His 'net.villain' persona isn't very good, but that doesn't really seem to matter - Mother Time is mostly paying attention to herself.

"Yeah, don't worry about being original, we've basically done all the cool stuff first." She swings the Hourglass thru the air and turns a stack of protein bars into a mountain of nuts, dates, and chocolate chips. She picks out a chip and nibbles on it daintily.

Right. Waste her time! Keep her talking! It's his strength! "So, Mother Time--"

"Hey, hey." She holds up a finger. "Call me Tamela. But not Tammy, capiche?"

"Ri-- capiche." Time-Waster lad slides the pan into the oven to reset his conversational momentum. "But uh, the Time Crapper. I don't really know the guy! What do you like about him?"

"Hmmmmmm..." Mother, uh, Tamela leans back against the kitchen counter, setting the hourglass on it and the scythe against it-- whew, that's a little less nerve-wracking. "Well, for one thing, he's real powerful. I find guys who can destroy the Looniverse in a fit of rage, then repair it when they get hungry, incredibly sexy."

Time-Waster Lad took a moment to think about Kid Kirby. "Yeah, that's hot."

"Right?" Tamela grinned lewdly, then rolled her head back and sighed. "Even tho he's so powerful, tho, I've always got to be the one telling him what to do. It's like he doesn't want anything. Except me, of course, which is nice I do admit~"

Time-Waster Lad nods thoughtfully. "You know, that reminds me of someone I used to work with. Miss Translation. Or, well... you remind me of her, and the Time Crapper reminds me of me, there." He giggles awkwardly, oh dear.

"Reeeeeally." Tamela goes back to grinning. "Was she hot?"

"Er, well, it, we didn't really have that kind of relationship!" Time-Waster Lad flushes. "...but yeah, she was. And she was super dynamic - going for what she wanted, leaping without looking."

"Fuck yeah. That's what I'm talking about." Tamela snaps her fingers and spins around in place. "You gotta have things you want and you gotta go for them."

Time-Waster Lad smiles. "Yeah. Really, I've never been great at wanting things... or, like, I'll want something really hard for a week and then forget why I wanted it in the first place. But she had these big heroic goals... um, you know, back when I was a net.hero was when this all was," he clarifies.

Tamela shrugs. "Hero goals, villain goals, whatever. We all want something, right? Hey, is that pizza done?"

"Oh, just a sec..." Time-Waster Lad grabs the oven mitts (patterned with little cheesecakes and hearts) and pulls the pizzas out, sliding them onto the plates, grabbing the pizza cutter, and making four precise slices. "Ta-da~"

Tamela grabs a slice and takes a big messy bite. "Mmmm! You're good at this shit."

Time-Waster Lad smiles, a little bit of pride rising in his breast despite the multilayered stress of the situation. "Yeah, well, I mess around in the kitchen a lot."

"Noice. You know, I bet you'd make a great henchman," says Tamela, and Time-Waster Lad notices her eyeing him very speculatively...

"Ahaha, well!" Time-Waster Lad blushingly steps behind the counter and engages Distracting Ramble Mode. "That's kind of how I feel I was for Miss Translation. She had the big goals and the loud voice and I was happy translating for her and keeping the violence pointed in the right direction."

"But it wasn't that kinda relationship, huh." Tamela wiggles her eyebrows.

"Heh, well..." Time-Waster Lad bites his lip. "I mighta had a bit of a crush... But also, like... it felt like I was really helping. Like I was making a difference in the lives of people I cared about." He shakes his head. "Haven't felt like that in a while, t'be honest."

"Mmmmmm..." Tamela crosses her arms. "Me either... but like, you're a net.villain now! You can just make whatever you want happen, by force!"

"Er, yeah." Time-Waster Lad licks his lips. Let's be honestish... "But, well, so far that hasn't been all that satisfying either."

"...yeah, for me either." Tamela is looking into Time-Waster Lad's face. She seems to be taking him seriously. Should he... I mean, they're friendshipping the villains, right? What would he tell a friend in this situation?

He'd... okay, he wouldn't put down what a friend was doing. "Like... don't get me wrong, I bet Acton Lord wouldn't be Acton Lord if he didn't like being a net.villain. And Manga Man always seemed like he was having fun."

Mother Time looks off into the distance. Her face, lines smoothed, calm, thoughtful, is... nice. "...actually, didn't both of them retire or something?"

"...oh, well, fair." Time-Waster Lad rubs the back of his head sheepishly. "I hear Manga Man's back, tho... er, well, anyway. The point is..." His chest fills with breath, and confidence suddenly flows back into his secret places. "I wouldn't be Time-Waster Lad if I didn't like to kick back and hang out, watch some TV, play a board game, heck, just shoot the breeze. Y'know? That's all me."

"...damn, y'know, I didn't think someone could be passionate about doing jack shit~" She reaches out, and the hairs on the back of Time-Waster Lad's neck stand up, but she just ruffles his hair affectionately. It seems like it should feel weird, condescending, but instead it's just kinda nice.

So he gives her a nice smile. "So yeah... but uh, if this hasn't been satisfying for you, maybe you need to..." He pushes that confidence back in. "Maybe you need to look at your net.villain name and go, hey, should I pick out another one?" He shrugs~ "I mean, no offense, but you don't seem like you'd really wanna have kids?"

"...hah! Yeah, that's true. I picked it to fit with loverboy in there, but..." She frowns. "Maybe I should've just picked out one for myself..."

Yes! Good! "Like what?" Time-Waster Lad says, encouragingly. There's a sound behind him - someone's pushing the doors of the cafeteria open - is Tweseveny back? But he tries to concentrate on Tamela's words.

"...mmmm... Maybe--"

"Excuse me." Time-waster Lad turns his head in shock - that's not Tweseveny's voice!

The doors swing closed behind a new figure. She wears a suit of armor, with panels of what looks like lacquered mahogany in curves reminiscent of the shells of insects. There's gold trim at the wrists, ankles, and neck, and along each joint, with ivory inlays running the length of each panel. She wears a helmet with a faceted yellow visor, shaped to resemble a pair of eyes squinting with supercilious superiority, and a pair of ornate clock hands in a V on her forehead. At her waist, she wears a golden belt, with a buckle that looks like an analog clock face, hands at 7:20.

Oh shoot. Time-Waster Lad doesn't recognize the outfit - is she a newbie LNHer, another net.villain, something else? "Uhhhhh, hello, fellow net.villain, I was just chatting with my fellow net.villain Mother Time here--"

"Right." The figure pushes past him and stands in front of Mother Time, arms crossed. "Why haven't you gone to get the Rung?"

"The LNHQ was undefended like you said," oh shoot thinks Time-Waster Lad that's who this is "but there's a Cosmic Bear blocking the way, so Time-Waster Lad and his henchlady offered to help us until it's taken care of."

The unfamiliar person who's definitely a net.villain of some sort just stares at Mother Time for a moment. She raises two fingers and rubs the little circle on her forehead, between the clock hands. "I said it would be almost undefended. As in very few net.heroes there. As in two."

"..." Mother Time stares off into space. Time-Waster Lad can see her face tightening, and his stomach drops out as he understands what she understands, as the peppy energy and the gentle words he sent to her erode away like a sandcastle in the tide. He takes a step backwards, then another, his chest tensing.

Without looking, Mother Time reaches out and picks up her scythe. The moment her hand closes around the handle, the blade blazes with the unearthly blue of Cherenkov radiation. "You know what. I'm picking a new name. I'll be..." She turns and brandishes the scythe! "KILLER OF STUPID JERK TIME-WASTER LAD... WOMAN!"

"eeeeeeeengh FRICK!" Time-Waster Lad throws himself backwards, heaviness in his belly spinning sickeningly, and bolts out the swinging doors. Mother Time grabs the Hourglass and gives chase!

The unfamiliar person watches them go, leaning on the counter, shaking her head and muttering to herself. "'There's a bear'? Come on! That's the oldest excuse in the book, next to the old cat-ate-the-ocarina gag!"

She straightens and turns, towards the reader, lenses looking through the words that you're reading to meet your gaze. "And as for you..."

     Tweseveny, lulled into the reverie of being a reader, startles out!

     The shape of the narrative is changing, turning, someone pushing her

     way out! Tweseveny pulls her perspective back, pulls herself back to being a character experiencing the story from within - but suddenly she's staggering back from an unfamiliar figure - no, she's very familiar - she's staggering back from Burst Beetle M-Plot!

"What--" says Tweseveny, back hitting the wall, hand going to her belt buckle. "How!?"

"A little messing with narrative framing shouldn't be that complicated for a writer." M-Plot spits the word like it's made of phenylthiocarbamide. "Time Crapper." She that focused gaze on  him. "She's lying, distracting you from getting the Rung. She's hoping for the LNH to return and stop you."

The Time Crapper stills. His faceless gaze turns to Tweseveny, and in a voice that's consciously held steady, but has a certain husky sadness to it nevertheless, he says, "Is this true?"

"...I..." Tweseveny bites her lip. She feels like dirt. She's failed to make a new friend, failed to support someone in trouble... now all she can do is fight another iteration of the same old battle.

Enough - she owes him an answer. She presses the pink gem on her belt buckle, and long sheets of old-style printer paper appear from nowhere to wrap her in a cocoon. The cocoon bursts to reveal black armor with amber trim, a helmet with a visor shaped like wide green eyes, shoulderpads shaped like a stylized 2 and 7, and a crest on her forehead in the shape of a V. She faces him, and slides into a defensive pose, fists up.

"...I see. Well." The Time Crapper smooths out his robe, stands up, and nods, solemnly, to Tweseveny. "Thank you, anyway, for listening to me. But net.villains do betray each other, and..." He spreads his hands. The plants on either side of the couch begin to wilt, and the lights seem to dim around them. "I think this is the part where I kill you and take what I want."

<<<*>>>

Drew "wanted to do even more reader-Tweseveny stuff but couldn't fit it in" Nilium

#Original Fiction #Superheroes #Adventure #Drama #Legion of Net.Heroes #Classic LNH #Burst Beetle Tweseveny

[ansgar-martinsson]

The Best Intentions - Part 14

“And I think you know I am most definitely at yours,” he said. “Have been from the get-go, since you first barged into my office. I must… I… I must confess,” he bowed his head and brushed his lips over the flushed skin at the peak of her breast, “that the thought of you, when I was reading your emails to me that first evening… I….” He paused, keeping his head low, but peering up at her beneath his long lashes.

“You what?” she gasped at the wanton grin that crossed his features, at the hunger that burned behind the blue of his eyes, at the clutch of his fingers on her thigh, on her back. “What did you do? Tell me.”

“I… I touched myself,” he growled. “I touched myself and imagined it was you. Just from reading your words on the computer screen, I wanted you.”

The air coursed from her lungs on a rough, shaky breath as her eyes blew wide, caught in his gaze, as her mouth went dry as a desert. She swallowed as he skin went pale and bright pink at the same time. “I think,” she rasped, “I think we should go. Now.”

Wordless, Ansgar stood. He stood and brought her to stand with him. “Yes,” he hissed. “Now.” He grabbed her roughly by the hand and strode toward the back  of the small room. A shove of his palm against the wall, and the paneling gave way with a click and a quiet schuss. A thick, heavy door, hidden from prior view, swiveled to reveal the starry midnight Stockholm sky above and the city beneath.

“What the?” Joline ogled. “How did you do that?”

Ansgar smiled down at her, his teeth bright and white in the glow of the streetlight. “I designed this place,” he said. “And I always include an escape route.”

She frowned. “Escape? But what about –”

“Our desserts will be delivered in the morning, just in time for breakfast,” he winked at her as they turned the corner from the alley on to the sidewalk. “And don’t worry about the bill. I’ve already paid. Now, come on,” he tugged at her, “I want to get you home.”

They strode quickly, hand-in-hand, his loafers slapping the concrete, her heels stabbing. The sound - in sync, echoing along with their heavy breaths off the glass of the buildings, absorbed in the wind and the hiss of traffic on the streets.

Only to be cut by a voice. A voice, accompanied by a quiet, sinister click. “Your wallet, her purse, and your watch, fuckface.”

Joline gasped. “Sgar!”

Ansgar froze, his breath caught in his chest, trapped there by the sharp poke of a gun barrel in his back. He lifted his hands, slowly, slowly…. “Okay,” he said. “Just, put that thing down, get it off me, and we’ll talk. Okay? I’m… I’m just going to turn around now, and we’ll have a little chat.”

The man took a step back.

Ansgar turned slowly in place, his hands still in the air. He shifted his eyes quickly toward Joline, signaling her to move, praying that she understood. She did. She stepped toward the shadow of the building, and stayed there.

But to no use. The man, his own fetid breaths coming heavy and full of fear, re-aimed his weapon toward her, one-handed, arm extended.

She gasped. “Ansgar!”

“Ssh,” Ansgar brought his finger to his lips, his hand still spread open. “Quiet, now. Stay still.”

The man lifted his stubbled chin at Ansgar. “Put your wallet and all your shit on the ground. Tell the bitch to gimme all her jewelry, and them shoes too.”

“Take it easy,” Ansgar cooed. “Take it easy.” One hand still held aloft, he reached toward his trouser pocket. “My wallet’s in here,” he pointed. “Right here.”

“Ansgar –”

“Ssh, I said.” he clipped. “It’s fine. It’s all fine. It’s all good. I’m simply going to give the man what he needs, and he is going to go away, isn’t that right, my good friend?”

“Gimme your money!” the man barked, waving the gun. His hand started to shake, his bony arm trembled. His eyes blew wide in his increasing agitation, his head swiveling left and right as fear, as impatience washed over him. “Do it fucking now or I blow your brains out!”

And there it was. Just like downtown. The moment Ansgar was waiting for. It was as if in slow motion, the movement of the gun in a shaky arc away from Joline, toward him; and in that limbo, in that sweep through the aimless no-mans land, Ansgar struck.

And he struck with precision, his movements sharp, purposeful and, above all, swift.

Turn the body. Grab the wrist. Twist up. Up. Up. Down. Down. Christ, he reeks! Struggle. Rrrrip. Damn it. My suit’s torn. Fucker. Roar. Wrist lock. Yes. Break the fingers. Like that. Just like this. Snap!

Gasp. Ah! Ah!

More. More. More! A vicious kick – heel to the knee. Watch him bend. Feel the give. Feel the pop! Mmmmmm. Yes. Relish in the screams. Like music, oh, so beautiful.

Elbow to the face. The cartilage crack! The blood flows warm oh so warm. Oh oh, that’s good! Backfist to the ribs. Left hook to the jaw. Now, take him down. A two-knuckled rabbit punch to the throat. Steal the breath.

Choke. Gasp. Gag. Wheeze.

And it was done. The man collapsed in a heap on the ground. He wailed, balled up, knees to chest like a wounded animal. Ansgar stood above him, panting, snarling, growling - the gun, the weight of it warm and happy and welcome in his hand – the safety off, the barrel cocked, and his finger clutched expertly upon the trigger.

“Ansgar –” Joline’s voice was distant in his ear. Far away. In his mind, maybe. Joline… Joline…. he could have hurt Joline, he could have….

“Bastard!” Ansgar roared at the quivering hunk at his feet. He bent at the waist and bellowed. “Don’t you know who I am? Who the fuck do you think you are!?”

The man rolled onto his back, and looked up, pleadingly at Ansgar. “Wait!” Blood poured from his nose, painting his filthy, pained and fear-laden, snot and tear streaked face with red smears. He held his hands aloft, shaking violently, two fingers bent at an unnatural angle. “Don’t… don’t shoot. I’m… please don’t shoot me, man. Don’t do it.”

Ansgar took a step closer and bent down, the gun held casually across his knee. “You fucked with the wrong man,” he gnarled, but before he spoke again, before he could issue another threat or make another move, he felt gentle hands on his shoulders.

“Ansgar, please.”  

He tensed. Her voice. He heard her voice, close, so close, and his mind shook, checking his body before he turned on her, before the lion threatened to rise again and unleash hell upon the wrong person.

“Leave him be,” she said, patting Ansgar’s arm. She came around to his side and lowered herself, holding out her hand. “Give the gun to me,” she said. “Give it to me. Leave him here. Take me home.”

Ansgar huffed and swallowed, coming back to himself. The fight, the instinct to rip and tear and hit and break washed off of him with her words. The adrenaline dialed back, dissipating, evaporating. He looked at her, and his face fell, anguished. “Jesus, Joline,” he dropped the gun into her hand and lurched forward, gathering her into his arms, taking her with him as he stood. He brushed his hands over her hair, her face, down her body. “Are you okay? You’re not hurt, are you?” He pressed his lips to her forehead. “Tell me you’re okay.”

Joline watched in horror, fearing for her own life, then for Ansgar’s, and finally for the life of their assailant looking for a quick payday. The roles quickly reversed and Joline learned firsthand how the man she’d just met claimed a lion as a self-portrait. He was ferocious and powerful and agile, his movements so quick and well-landed that she felt her reactions were four beats behind him.

She hated violence, never saw the sense in it or the logic behind it. The bleeding coward huddled on the cement only used it as a scare tactic; that was clear enough. But he folded like a gingerbread house under the threat of an expertly equipped opponent in Ansgar.

She heard the sickening crush of the asshole’s fingers, then felt it in the sinking nausea all the way to her feet, finally then saw the evidence in the way he favored that hand. Joline couldn’t ignore the growing instinct within her to help the man in need, despite his adversarial position. The diplomat that she inhabited at the opera house wanted to diffuse and neutralize the situation before catastrophe struck.

She took a step forward on her right foot a split second before the crumble of nasal cartilage against face jolted and jostled her. She jerked awkwardly on her ankle, stepped at a weird and unnatural angle, effectively cracking the heel of her borrowed Louboutin. She stumbled to the ground, but recovered herself quickly with an inconsequential scrape on the heel of her hand.

Ansgar bested the coward, no contest. He gained control of the gun then, and threatened the nobody with it. The barely contained and incredulous arrogant rage she saw in her date scared her. For a split second she wondered if he even knew she was there anymore. Manager mode kicked in before she could dwell on it for any amount of time. As she handled the hotheaded Lionel in the set department when he screamed his voice raw about a director changing his vision, Joline pitched her voice low, pleadingly, “Ansgar, please.”

The force of his vehement fury became the magnitude for his concern for her. His hands on her hair were confident tenderness, fierce loyalty and the change in him threw her. She couldn’t look away, as if the switch in his demeanor would write an explanation on his face in plain black and white print.

“I-I’m fine, Sgar. Come away with me.” She spoke evenly not to upset the balance of his temper.

He grasped her hands in his and squeezed. The pressure caused her to wince when her scraped palm tinged in discomfort. “You are hurt,” the irritated beast growled, unrolling her palm to inspect the damage. He snarled at the wounded animal, left but not forgotten where he dropped.

Joline raised her abused hand to the straightedge of Ansgar’s cheekbone, encouraging him away from the blubbering mess of a man on the ground. “Ansgar, look at me. You’ve a scratch, a scratch on your face… just here.” She traced underneath the small slash of raised skin, raw from the scuffle. It didn’t bleed, just hollered to make itself known.

“That doesn’t matter,” his face still turned toward the unexpected victim. “He hurt you.”

She tried again to get him to focus on her instead of the fight, “Sgar, please… I fell. He didn’t hurt me. I caught myself up trying to break my fall.” She softened to mimic her voice in the restaurant, “Now come away with me. Take me to yours.”

The first few steps away were hesitant and tense, Ansgar intent on teaching the mugger a lesson. Joline attempted to temper his bad mood. The broken heel underlined the silence between them, as she didn’t want to draw attention to the scene.

“FUCK!!!!!” No sooner than the elevator dinged to a close behind them, Ansgar threw a lamp from the foyer across the vast width of his open concept flat. The thing shattered against the oblong white quartz kitchen island. It sailed from his hand in a straight shot, an aggravated growl accompanied it. The act of aggression only made him wince and crumble in pain from over-exerting his bruised ribs.

Joline dropped her clutch on a low end table with a matching lamp on it, toed off the borrowed shoes and went to him. “Hey, hey, hey… let it go, Sgar.” She touched his arm to recall him back to their night. “Very little damage, very little harm…” She clutched the air as he stalked away from her. “An annoyance is all it was.”

She reached for him to situate him onto one of the sectionals in the room overlooking a wall of windows showing a panoramic view of the city of Stockholm. The lights glittered and sparkled and moved to become its own living, breathing and beating epicenter. Her tiny hands on his broad, broad and stressed shoulders didn’t stop him. “The little cretin is nothing to be angry about, Sgar.” She recognized her own manager voice modulating and appealing in its even and soothing resonance.

The savage part of Ansgar, his baser, more animal slice of him couldn’t let go of the fight, needing to maul the threat and protect what was his. “I’m not stupid or unobservant, Joline,” he spat, pacing along the wall of windows.

“I never—“

“You didn’t tell me about the fucking shoes, Joline!!” He pointed to the Louboutins that she’d taken off as subtly as possible.

She’d worked with egos, arrogant and assertive people for most of her career, but maybe not one as ferocious as Ansgar, and never in a personal capacity. She was almost sure that he wouldn’t hurt her on purpose, but he was capable of it. Calmly, she approached him, “Tonight wasn’t about the shoes, the gun, or a common criminal. Don’t let the last twenty minutes ruin all that happened before that.”

He continued to stomp from one end of the room to the other through the largest lounge she’d ever seen, maybe the size of the O2 arena in London. He stalked from the pristine kitchen island to the cover of the fireplace that dominated the whole of the opposite wall, the nightlife of Stockholm herself as his backdrop. The lines and the angles of the room were stark, precise and showed no imperfection, order, uniform and clean. Ansgar didn’t have time for disruption, in his home or out of the street.

Joline tiptoed over to him, blocking another pass of the couch, and took his hands. “Don’t let this upset you, Sgar. The little brat isn’t worth a second thought, the shoes even less.”

“He could’ve hurt you, Joline!! Fuck! The brat motherfucker turned a gun on you!” His voice boomed through the massive room to the grand piano in the opposite corner, close to the front door.

“A misguided youth, Sgar… seeking money he didn’t earn,” her voice low and calm, to sooth. “Truly. Nothing happened.” She smoothed her hands from his shoulders down his chest after placing his hands on her waist. As her fingers ascended again, she insinuated them under the lapels to push the ruined fabric off his oh so deliciously wide shoulders. “He didn’t win.”

Ansgar held fast to his anger. “Why didn’t you tell me about the damn shoes?”

Joline shimmied the arms of his suit down the length of his arms and chucked the useless garment aside. “They’re not important, only this.” She pressed her body against his, working to swing his focus. Her fingers started at the top button of his white dress shirt, unlooping them one by one.

“You, you should have told me.”

Joline fluttered her lashes up at him as her fingers continued their task. “Okay, Ansgar, why? What would’ve you gained from knowing that?”

He suddenly couldn’t answer, he’d forgotten why her non-disclosure angered him so much when her hands touched his chest. Up and over his shoulders, she slowly undressed him, tossing aside any reminder of the events after the restaurant.

Joline took a step back from him long enough to unzip her dress and let it fall to the floor at her feet. She stood before him, naked and stealing the last of the fight in him. “You don’t want to argue with me.” She took up his hands and placed each on one of her breasts, one and then the other. “These hands don’t want to fight. I’ve seen that. Show me that your hands know… how not to fight.”

#the best intentions

[weirdfetishes123]

The buttercream balloon - deviantart

"What a stupid place."

Little prick. Keep it up.

"The hell are we anyway?" Derek grunted, smacking his gum.

"Language, son."

Derek's father looked at him sternly, but the hierarchy was clear: the simpering businessman had no real authority over his boy. The Italian hunk was his daddy's pride and joy, spoiled rotten from birth. Now muscular, hairy and handsome... Derek could do no wrong. Indeed, Mr. Calhoun idolized his pushy little track star. Pampered him. Supported every fancy and whim. Mr. Calhoun saw every reason to. He's gifted. A scholar. An athlete. All the girls love him. And most of the boys, too. And it was Derek's gamely spirit that landed them a chance at a lifetime supply of chocolate. They would turn a record profit. All they needed to do was outlast the competition.. "I agree, Wonka," Calhoun asserted, "where the hell are we going?"Rooms whizzed past, throwing flashes of colorful light across the cohort of fathers and sons as they careened down a current of chocolate. Fudge Farm. Watermelon Mountain. The Rat Room. What a bunch of storybook nonsense. All Derek wanted was the prize. He didn't want to eat it. Fuck no. Lose his perfect physique? More like, make millions off this little twat of a candy buffoon. But they had been at it all day, one stupid room after the next. No one was folding. That fat little fuck almost fell in the chocolate river, but his daddy saved him at the last minute. It was like they all knew it was a game. Who would be the first to get disqualified? Wonka had them sign such a comprehensive contract, the merest burp might be rude enough.Wonka's eyes twinkled with excitement as a room flashed before him. These little twerps weren't falling off the vine as ripely as he expected, so he'd bring the vines to them. They've thwarted every downfall, he grimaced. But I can get that smelly swine in the track suit to break the rules.The Oompah Loompahs were placing bets, as always, and Wonka knew the control rooms were giddy (and sploogy) with erotic excitement and frustration. His heart sighed. It worked out so well, letting his horny little satyrs run wild with imaginative ways to null contracts. "Quite right! Stop the boat!" With expert skill, the Oompah Loompahs ejected the ferry from the current and steered it in flamboyant circles to rest beside a shadowy dock. Derek rolled his eyes. Just dock the fucking boat. "You're going to love this one," Wonka breathed, winking at Derek. "My boy is first," Mr. Calhoun demanded, shoving Derek to the front of the group and guiding him onto the dock. Wonka watched the boy move under his father's command, cocky and masculine. Such supple and tight muscles under that track suit. Looks like good stitching, too, for a spandex mix. Yellow is a bit gosh, but then... his buttocks do look ever so plump. "Gather round gentlemen," Wonka grinned. "Come in closer, everyone. Good, good..." As the men jostled about him, Derek studied the bright sign over the giant factory doors. His lazy chewing slowed, his mind attempting to unravel the mystery. What the fuck... BUTTERCREAM BALLOONS "My dear friends... this is one of my favorite new rooms. It's simply packed full of flavors--" "Isn't buttercream only one flavor," Derek snapped. "That's quite right," Mr. Calhoun followed with pride. "Good catch, son." "Buttercream is but a base of butter, my boy," Wonka replied, "a delicious, gooey base. But this isn't any old buttercream. This is special. It comes from a wonderful place--" "Oh get on with it!" "Patience kiddo," the candy man soothed. "Let's not lose our heads. I can't have that happen, not again... I will admit you boys on two conditions: absolutely no touching and definitely no tasting. Our recipe isn't quite right. There could be disastrous consequences... Eyes only..." With a slight bow, Wonka stepped aside. Derek pushed his way into the room. He gasped and shivered, squinting in the light. A cold and sterile processing room... Refrigerated. Brightly lit. High ceiling. Nothing like the ridiculous candy entrance Wonka made with the chocolate waterfall and all that idiocy. Nothing here but white walls and shiny metal machines.

But the smell... Butter. Caramel. Sugar. Cream. It lured Derek in. Sent a bolt of electric pleasure coursing through his prick. The group filed around the edge of a guardrail that allowed them a birds-eye view of whole operation. Down in the center of the circular room stood a wide, slightly elevated platform, wet with a few puddles of yellow goop. Around the edge of the room, large cylindrical vats boiled and bubbled while Oompah Loompahs in white suits moved busily between them, carting ingredients and consulting over control panels. Wonka smiled down at his little dairy men in their darling dairy hats and sighed. "Imagine!" he cried out. "Imagine a world in which you could harvest buttercream straight from a tap so divine, so perfectly designed that it never stopped blessing you with more..." "You'd be rich," one man snorted, "but there's no such tap." "Ingredients have to come from somewhere," another chimed. "That's what I thought, too," Wonka nodded. "Until just last week when one of my very own brave little men returned from his terrifying homeland bearing a strange gift..." Wonka motioned to the center of the room as two Oompah Loompahs rolled a large, white, perfectly spherical ball onto the platform. Their gloved hands pressed with expert care at the glossy globe. Rubbery and mesmerizing. Derek gasped softly at the sight, ogling with every other boy the cue ball of fat like it was a fantastic diamond... "You making soccer balls for giants in here Wonka?" "All I need to provide is a vessel. Something elastic. This extraordinarily rubbery ball of cream, for example. Each of these expandable pearls," Wonka elated with a proud gesture, "is worth more than twice my chocolate fountain for its utility. You'll never guess where I get them." Wonka winked at a plump businessman and raised his eyebrows. "Nobody?" he chuckled. "Well, I suppose the Egg Room is a bit wild for today. But it's a wonderful show. And as you can see, the eggs those boys--geese--produce is beautiful." "What is that thing?" Derek chewed. "Why, it's the most amazingly larded fatty buttercream you've never tasted, my boy!" Wonka exclaimed. "Its taut exterior masks a rich, creamy blend of white and gold buttercreams. Well, they're not quite buttercreams yet, you see, we still have to introduce the magic of..." As Wonka marveled about the properties of this strange white ball, Mr. Calhoun discreetly cupped his boy's luscious rump and stepped him to the side of the group. "It's now or never," Calhoun whispered. "Take it." "But Daddy--" "If we wait," the man snapped in agitation, "we'll never see that prize. You're smarter than they are. See those double doors? They lead to the central corridor." "It's too risky--" "It's all we've got, son. Everything is riding on this score. You know that. Now be a big boy and steal that priceless ball of blubber. I showed you where the corridors converge; you'll be back in that ridiculous candy entrance with the chocolate waterfall in five minutes flat. It's a breeze from there to the front gates." "It looks awful dense!" "Denser than you," the man seethed, his middle finger exploring the valley between Derek's firm cheeks. "No video games for a month. No TV for a year. You'll be cleaning toilets at the rec center this summer." He pushed his finger up between and whispered. "Son..." "Fine! I'll do it!" "Good sport," Mr. Calhoun said with a playful peck on his boy's cheek. "...and once they've blown it up to tremendous proportions, and I mean staggering, we roll it through those doors to the Prep Room." "What happens in there?" "Why, our fabulously fatty cream balloon is positively pampered. Weighed and measured, polished, topped off, decorated, packaged. Signed, sealed and delivered! Quite the involved operation, but my little men are quite fond of their work. They do love to make things grow..." "Bank accounts?" Mr. Calhoun suggested with playful, patronizing animation.

"Oh but my process is priceless. Who could duplicate any one of my remarkable efficiencies? But to your point, sir, many balloons will ripen in the Prep Room for months. Even years. We pride ourselves on quality, gents. I have a buttercream balloon so rich that it's reached 4,000 percent fattiness!" "Dad, look!" one of the boys exclaimed. "He's going to take it!" Mr. Calhoun gasped with the rest of the tour and then sighed rather proudly, slapping the candy man on the shoulder. "Alpha boys, right?" Derek was shaking with adrenaline. Fuck this stupidity. No touching? No tasting? This was a tour of a candy factory, for fuck sake. Derek toppled little orange dairy men left and right, upsetting tubs of cream and knocking over tables to reach the buttercream ball. And it smelled incredible. He pressed his hands against it, but before he could roll it, it gave slightly, like a ripe melon, breaking gently at the pressure of his fingertips and yielding a thick, rich cream. Derek looked up at the exit doors--strangely so much larger from this perspective. Five times his size easy. How did they get so big? Why... "I wouldn't touch that if I were you." Wonka's warning brought Derek back to the ball. He knew he was supposed to grab it and run. He knew, yet the rich cream oozing down its tight surface... The aroma... Sweet and ripe, like a rich sugary cheese... Yes. Just one taste. One and then I'm going for the exit... "Daddy he's touching and tasting!" "I'd say that's a breach of contract," a man growled. "How's that buttercream, my boy!" Mr. Calhoun nervously deflected, shouting down to his son, who brought a second handful of goop to his mouth with extra flair for his audience. "Mmmmmm! Worth every calorie!" Derek shouted back. The muscular boy whipped around, licking his fingers theatrically for all to see. "It's okay Wonka," he shrugged. "But it's missing something. Like I said: one flavor. I mean it's good, don't get me wrong, but if I were you, I'd tell your little freak this present sucks." Wonka smirked. Right where I want you, handsome little prick. "Stupid boy. You haven't listened to a word I've said since we entered this room." "Since we entered this factory, dumbass. Everything you say is nonsense!" The group gasped; Mr. Calhoun blushed. But Derek's blatant nastiness delighted the candy man. It gave him a tingle. Finally! Some contempt for the rules. Selfishness. It was finally happening. He felt the heated arousal of the Oompah Loompahs, giddy as always with lust. "Don't take my word for it," the arrogant boy continued, flexing a little. "I don't eat sweets. Today's a holiday from the usual regimen. Gotta keep this body hard and tight to compete." "Hard and tight, you say?" Wonka repeated, his eyes glancing up to the ceiling, which was quietly drawing open. "Kids a shoo-in for state champ," beamed Calhoun, quietly shaking from the turn of fate the scene had taken. "He's smart as a whip, too. H-he could be running your factory someday." "Dad what's that!" someone gasped. A large tentacle descended toward Derek, weaving through the air like a snake: green and slick, alive and pulsing, yet dappled with beautiful purple and yellow flowers, and a head like the most luscious erection Mr. Calhoun or any of the men around him had ever seen. The Oompah Loompahs hovered at the edges of the room in hushed anticipation, sneers rippling through the lot. A mess of lesser vines followed the larger vine down, dancing mischievously around it as they moved closer and closer to the naive boy on the platform... "Whatever, Wonka," Derek gibed. "This shit is lame, but we're taking it now and there's nothing you can do to stop us--" Before the stud could finish his retort, the clever vines ensnared him: they wrapped his wrists and ankles, wrestling his legs and arms away from his body. "Huh!?"

"It needs a vessel to unload its buttercream," Wonka sighed, patting Derek's shocked father on the belly. "My rubbery cheese balls work very well. Their incredible elasticity makes them perfect for collecting hundreds of pounds of buttercream daily. But it appears the vines of the Fattius Maximus Embarricus have an altogether different balloon to blow up this time." "B-balloon!" Mr. Calhoun stuttered, eyes widening. "Mr. Wonka, I am a teacher of biology," announced a professorial type. "There's simply no such plant!" "Embarricus is a rare find, to be sure," Wonka engaged, turning away from the scene on the platform with a snobbish lack of interest. "But as you can see, he does exist. He was quite small when he first arrived, but as I fed him, he grew amazingly large. He has his own room above this one and can supply multiple rooms below with a variety of confectionery delights. It's magical, the bond we developed as I nurtured him. He gives so much back to me now..." "Get away from me! Get off of me! Dad! Mr. Wonka!" the spoiled brat yelled, swatting at the curious vines as they secured his squirming body, holding his limbs in a taut X. "They're searching him, as they always do," Wonka continued. He watched the vines feel the boy up, carelessly violating his dignity. "Palpating. For a hole." "A hole!?" Calhoun gasped. "Wonka you gotta do something! Close your mouth, son!" "And if they can't find a hole," Wonka added, checking his fingernails nonchalantly, "they'll make one. I've learned that the hard way. But at the rate your son blabbers, Derek will have his mouth full in no time." "Daddy helpppmmpphh!" Derek cried as the large vine's cock head pushed between his lips, pacifying him. His eyes grew huge and wet with tears as sweet cream immediately released from the phallic gag. His powerful muscles flexed in frustrated attempts to pull himself free as the thick cream filled his mouth and expanded his cheeks. The plant had its vessel. Derek felt the flow increasing, pumping globs of butter down his throat and filling his stomach. It was delicious... he moaned... gulping... the strain against his abs was nearly painful. "Daddy, there's another one!" Derek twisted uselessly in his trap as a second flowery vine descended. It was even larger than the first, its engorged cock head dripping with blorts of cream. Derek tried to scream, but his mouth was packed with the most delicious buttercream he'd ever tasted. It stretched his stomach and his track suit bulged. He was getting impossibly full! Please... no..."A second vine, why how marvelous!" Wonka clapped. "A real treat!" The smaller vines explored Derek's firm, muscular ass, seeming to admire the expansive curves. They rotated him forcefully to bring his growing butt into full view of the audience. Plump and juicy. Fathers cleared their throats with embarrassed modesty; boys gasped in fascination. Derek wiggled his fists and feet at the indignity of being handled like this, in front of all these handsome gentlemen. He whined and whimpered. "They're sensing something," Wonka whispered, eyes glued to the helpless boy. The smaller vines palpating Derek's plump ass seemed to communicate with the largest vine, drawing its attention to the ripe rump. The boy blushed as he recognized their intentions. "They've found another hole!" a man gasped. Derek screamed as the second large vine pushed between his cheeks, ripping right through the seams of his track suit and burrowing slimy and warm into his moist crack. "No TV for a year," Wonka sighed wistfully, gently teasing Mr. Calhoun's erection. The candy man loved the confusion on the man's face as he watched his precious boy being handled by the plant. "I hear all in this factory. I would say this is a breach of contract, wouldn't you? Conspiring to larceny? I confess, I had high hopes for you two. I really did. But you're just as much a sham as the rest of these pretenders. You put on airs, but the stitching isn't quality." "Hold on, son!" Mr. Calhoun shouted, but two limber Oompah Loompahs held him back.

"You don't want to go down there," Wonka warned. "Unless you want to join him..." The businessman turned apple red. Tears filled his eyes. "We gotta let the air outa him quick!" "There's no air in there..." Wonka corrected. "Look at his pants!" a kid laughed. Mr. Calhoun's face heated with humiliation. "He likes it!" another father shouted. Derek screamed uselessly at the man's insinuation, but his erection was now obvious. He had tented huge and wet through his track suit, dribbling uncontrollably with precum. Why was he boned? He looked from face to face through fathers and sons, gulping like a maniac. Why was no one helping him? They were shocked. And amused. Aroused... Frustration gripped him at the thought and he writhed against his juicy captor. But the huge vine up his inflating bum was too engorged with cream, pumping and pulsing it into him, massaging his prostate and sending waves of pleasure and anger through his body as it literally fucked him fatter. Derek cursed the candy maker as cream plopped down all over him, decadent and excessive in its oozy abundance. Yet even as the boy gulped and chewed, a secret part of him, a part deep down between his legs, deeper still in his hole--the only part his Daddy knew how to control--was a barnyard hog desperate to be let out to wallow. The vines knew it. They're doing this on purpose, he whined, flapping helplessly and struggling in his trap. "He's blowing up!" "It's his arrogance that's done it!" Blowing up?! The insane pressure in his stomach had strangely relaxed... Derek panicked, struggling to look down at himself. He was inflating like a balloon! His belly was the size of a large pumpkin, pressing against his suit as his pecs swelled into melons of cream. His hips widened and his ass blimped... everything was expanding at an alarmingly cartoonish rate. And all he could do was wiggle his fingers and toes helplessly. Mmmmppphhh! "Poor kid, how much will he grow?" "There's no science to it yet," Wonka replied. "He'll get as much as the vines give him." "How much can he handle?" "I find muscular young men like Derek to be quite elastic. He's in such fine shape, I'm sure he'll come out on top. And look at that little dinkie! You can't say he doesn't like it..." Derek whimpered as the Oompah Loompahs moved toward the platform, quietly circling to watch the rude brat get his just deserts. The blubbering boy winced and wiggled as his suit ripped and patches of creamy skin appeared through the frays. Every pound, every swallow was heaven. He was bubbling up, blimping out, gurgling, the rhythm of the lustful vine between his huge hairy buttcheeks loudly and humiliatingly fucking him like a stuck pig. The smaller vines made gentle circles on the head of his fat, creamy cock as it pulsed under his straining spandex pants. Dribbling wet. Oozing cream. Desperate and flooded with hormones. His package seemed to be growing, too, but at a slower rate than his thighs, which were now globular balloons of fat, swallowing his dick and melting into the expansive shape of his thighs and ass. His calves swelled like ripening cherries; his shoulders and arms blimped into giant balls of lard, impossibly huge, rubbery and cheesy... His belly inflated the fastest, pushing outward in all directions... anger strained his face... SNAP! POP! Mmmmppphhh! Derek screamed in relief as his pants ripped away and his shirt shredded into bits. The hoggish boy was now fully exposed. Ballooning under the bright lights for all to see! Creamy tears filled his eyes and ran down his massive cheeks. How big was he going to get? His legs pushed apart as fat swallowed his thighs. Wider, farther... until he balanced on tip toes, buttercream filling the space between his legs and locking them apart from the inside. The head of his cock, now the size of basketball, finally became overwhelmed with blubber and sank into his gut pad as it ballooned with rich fattiness. His shoulders and arms were Michelin tires of fat, globular blimps swallowing his grasping little hands... "He's ripening like a fruit..."

"Like cheese," Wonka replied flatly. "If we aren't careful, the boy's liable to ripen irreversibly. It's quite a delicious conundrum!" "There goes the championship!" "I'm sure Guinness has a place for him, if there's any of him left..." Derek gurgled expletives at the laughing men through his gag, cream blobbing down over his cheeks and chest. The vines teased his swelling tits, arousing them to hard, huge points; they dribbled and spurted yellow goop as they ripened so large that they pushed the boy's triple chins into a depression; Derek's head was now sinking in his circular frame, along with his feet and hands. He was getting tighter and growing yellower by the second. He wobbled in the grip of the vines, gelatinous and horrible... "The pressure looks tremendous!" "Is that music?" Wonka suggested. Lights dimmed and the buttercream balloon was suddenly center-stage, spotlighted in his embarrassing predicament. A rhythm had indeed started. Oompah Loompahs pounded against tables and drummed utensils on the vats, louder as the minutes melted away. Tubas bwomped in time with the beat, their deep farts sending waves of lustful pleasure through Derek's trapped, gloopy dick. Babydick! Derek strained to see the dairy man who whispered the humiliating word. Others chimed in, but Derek could merely flap and fuck the vine harder in response. Fat fuck! Loser! Diapers forever, stud! With a violent POP! the large vine pulled away from Derek's mouth, revealing the reddened face of the little brat, cheeks enormous with cream. Stuffed beyond recognition. The vine ascended, the force of its removal leaving the blimp unstable. He wobbled precariously for a moment like a terrific bowl of jelly, but the large vine pumping his heinie expanded suddenly, steadying him. He tried to move, but he could barely waddle left or right. He stood naked in the center of the room, flapping his wrists and looking from one little dairy man to the next in desperate abandon. It was his time to listen. And listen he did, as the vine pumped away... Now that we've got your attention, dear boy . It is time to explain your demise! You were rude, you were loud, You were selfish and proud, Now you're swelling with cream from the vines! Silly daddy did pamper and spoil you rotten, Never stopping to spank you; all manners forgotten! But we'll teach you to see, And we think you'll agree, It's his fault for this fattening lesson you're caught in! Mr. Calhoun blushed at the accusation. Wonka smirked as the two men stood nearly nose-to-nose, Derek screaming in the background. "Like what you see?" Wonka whispered. The two men looked down at Calhoun's erection, now visibly soaking his fine pants. Tsk tsk, Wonka chided patronizingly as an Oompah Loompah unzipped Calhoun's pants and pulled his throbbing boner into the light. "Did you want him to get caught, Daddy?" With tears in his eyes, the businessman nodded. "Yes, Mr. Wonka." "Do you like watching him get fat?" Calhoun gasped in rapture. "Yes... so very fat Mr. Wonka..." "Compliments of the house," Wonka announced. Calhoun felt a rushed of sensation as the Oompah Loompah blorted out a thick, cheesy cream over his cock and began pumping it with both white-gloved hands. He looked over at the other men, worried his lust was exposed, but they were equally attended. Little dairy men had the entire party by their swollen members. "I hate to spoil the fun, gents, but you might as well all lose your heads." Businessmen gasped and grunted, handsome and lustful, as little hands pampered their penises to the sight of the sobbing, blubbering balloon on the platform. Derek moaned pitifully as Oompah Loompahs thumped against his marvelously round belly and ass, the rhythm of their beat complimenting the thrusts of the pump squirting cream mindlessly between his legs. His feet were disappearing into fat, rising off the platform. He was filling out in all directions. Sinking. Ballooning. Becoming a sphere of fatty cream. Please... help me...

Trumpets drowned his moans and jazzy tubas farted a beat as a silly light show began to flash around him, Oompah Loompahs dancing on catwalks above. They jeered at the wet-eyed boy peering up at them, losing the battle to total inflation snuff. Oompah Loompah! Doopity doo! We've got a wet, sticky puzzle for you Oompah Loompah! Doopity dee! If you're a butter blob, listen to me! They made piggy faces in mocking delight. In response, the boy burped out a massive blob of cream that blubbered apart over his enormous tits and glazed the expanse of his gloriously gigantic belly: he was the spitting image of the very cream ball he hoped to steal. What do you get when your kid is a prick? Blimp him so fat that cream cums out his dick! Derek--if we can still call the swelling globe of fat a boy at all--moaned uselessly in the noise, his arms and legs impossibly far apart. Now he knew why those doors had to be so large. He was beyond fat. He was pure fat. A sphere of golden fat. His body was a thick rubbery texture and he was filling fast to the brim with the fattiest cream imaginable. Feet horizontal, a world of fat between his legs. Little fists sinking in tightening cheese. Please... help me... What happens now that he's swollen and tight? Force him to cum for us day and night! "He's sinking!" Mr. Calhoun shouted, edged to utter madness. "He'll explode!" "Nonsense," Wonka replied, lowering himself to the little dairy man wrenching Calhoun's cock. "Help this sorry, spoiled man get his little boy to the Prep Room at once." "What for?" gasped the fat businessman in the grip of near-orgasm, unable to tear his eyes from the spectacle. "My! That boy's getting quite FAT! He's so marvelously FAT Wonka, I daresay he's FAT FAT FAT!" And he nodded stupidly to the Oompah Loompa pumping his crank. "But just HOW fat Wonka?" another man added with an air of business-like interest, gasping on edge. "Can you measure him? Weigh him? How FAT will he get?""Can you measure his richness?" another man boomed with pleasure. "Ripeness?" "He's tight as a drum!" a boy breathed, fascinated by the yellowing cream blimp. "No, I won't hold you responsible if it's too late," Wonka whispered to the Oompah Loompah working over Calhoun. "Well please try. We can't have him bursting in here like the last one, it will take weeks to clean up." With another loud POP! the vine pulled itself from Derek's butthole and retracted. The men and boys gasped in surprise. The whimpering balloon was still tightening. Rounding into a perfect sphere. Wiggling. It knew it deserved every word. Every pound. But it didn't want to go like this. Not like this... The platform began to rotate, displaying the balloon's perfection for the groaning tour. Pulled by his penis, a sniffling red-faced father descended the nearby stairwell and moved through the dancing crowd of dairy men toward what was left of his boy: a giant, gurgling, tightening, towering ball of dairy cream. Mr. Calhoun glanced from face to singing face in humiliation as they pulled him along, lecturing the whole way... What happens to blubberboys? Where do they go? Are they measured and weighed? Are they polished for show? Are they babied and diapered, Or lathered in cream? Are they sold at an auction? Do they burst at the seams? Calhoun looked up. The balloon was enormous! Two stories of glistening fat. Toes and fingers were no longer visible. Just a few desperate whimpers and deep farts reverberating through the music proved a boy once existed in there. "My precious son..." They get no more choices, No freedom, no fun-- Except cumming, of course, And that job's never done! The cream balloon felt his fathers hands pressing. Palpating. Feeling what had become of the mouthy brat. Mr. Calhoun nervously ran his hands over the balloon's expanse. "D-Derek, are you i-in there son? A-are you alive?"

But... how hot this balloon felt! Like a giant rubbery fucktoy... Mr Calhoun moaned and rubbed in huge circles. Lustfully. He slapped both hands against what was left of his boy's huge ass. Cream oozed gently down all sides of the balloon. A rich, decadent end... Now come, Daddy, please, Give this cheese ball a push! Help us roll it away To milk cream from its tush! We must package it quick, While there's still time to pump! Buttercream from its dick, Provolone from its rump! The huge factory doors opened and Calhoun strained, shoving the massive balloon forward. Its muffled screams drowned in the silly tubas, whistles and clapping, the celebration of FAT going on around them. It picked up momentum and rolled like a perfect product down the platform ramp and out of sight, screaming all the way, cream splurting from its wet little peepee hole and deliciously huge butthole. Oompah Loompah, doopity dah! If you're not spoiled then you will go far! You will live in fattiness too, "Farewell, Mr. Calhoun," Wonka waved smugly. "You get the prize after all. Cream for life." The businessman whined in frustration, pulled yet again by his juicy erection, this time through the doors to the Prep Room. Oompah Loompah's sang to him and he nodded back, understanding now. This was the right thing to do. Give up. Give in... Likely, Oompah Loompah, bloompah doopity DOO! *tuba bwomp*

*factory doors sealing shut*

[aristarshower]

Star Catcher

Masterpost

Adventure Twenty-The Many Uses Of a Harvester

 “So quick recap we are somehow back in time and our ship is disintegrating very very slowly.”

Yup.

“The new dust is some kind of super dust that can drive us fast but the shark can catch up anyway and eat us all.”

Yah.

“Even if we find a way to get rid of the shark, we might not have a way to get back after Jai’s link broke.”

Mmmhmm.

“And if we get out the shark will probably follow us and eat us anyway.”

Mmmmmm.

“Harpie.” V sighed. “Why the fuck are you taking a break now?”

Harpie shrugged with their mouth full of glass shards.

***

“Amani, how much firepower do we need to get this thing off our backs.” Alina demanded as Star Catcher zoomed around the shark. Both Dex and Nisha were concentrating on navigating the ship away from the huge mass of space shark chasing them.

“More than what we have, cap.”

“Shit.”

“Unless…”

“I’m willing to listen to anything, Amani, we can’t let this thing follow us to the other side.”

And we need to leave before we all die. Dig added helpfully.

“Right.” Amani licked her lips. “This is fucking crazy but do you know that The Element is super explosive. I’m talking horrible enough to fuck up entire star systems.”

“Woah.”

“It is a big secret for obvious reasons but I had a chance to activate some once and it was…” Amani mimed her head being blown off.

Alina considered her options. “Well it’s this or die so let’s do it.”

“That’s the problem, cap.”

“What?”

“One of us will have to go with it.”

***

I stress eat, okay? Harpie hissed.

“Hey, it will be alright.” V tried his best soothing voice. It came out a bit strangled when the ship turned suddenly.

I really doubt that, V. Harpie crunched for a few seconds , dusted their hands and got up. But let’s take that fucking shark with us if we are going.

***

“Look this discussion is pointless, I’m the only one who knows how to do this.” Amani shouted into the control room.

I do too. Dig said softly in the following silence. Four pairs of eyes swiveled to them.

What? You are not the only one with a “past”.

“Alright, that’s two of us but I am the older one. I’ve lived a whole life…”

I’m in no hurry to die. Why are you? Dig cocked their head at Amani.

“I am not.” Amani hung her head. The gesture shocked Alina out of the panic Amani’s declaration out her in. Amani never looked weak. “I brought us into this. Yoen was going to give this job to someone else. He thought it was too dangerous.” She held up a hand at Alina’s half formed protest. “He loves you and he is scared. For good reason, it seems.” She gazed around the room miserably not meeting anyone’s eyes.

“Did you convince him?”

“No, I did something worse. I went over his head. Talked to the client.” Nisha gasped.

“Yeah, I don’t know who they are but I contacted them when I went back to get Dex.” Dex’s face shut down completely and he turned away.

“It was easy after that. But I never thought it would come to this. I’m so sorry.”

What did we miss? Harpie asked.

“Amani might be the reason we are in this mess and one of us is going to be shark dinner and then we can blow it up.” Dex said in a mechanical voice like he was counting things off a grocery list.

Woah.

***

“Are you okay?” V curled his fingers around Dex’s shoulders. Behind them, Alina and Nisha were having a whispered argument with Amani and Dig.

“Not really.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Everything.” V hugged Dex still in his chair. Dex could also feel the tip of V’s head brushing against his neck.

“Amani didn’t come back for me.”

“What?”

“She came back for the project. She just needed an excuse.” V spun the chair around and the whole ship lurched.

“Harpie, can you handle this for a bit?”

Sure. Harpie had abandoned their own control room in favor of staying with the rest of them.

V dragged Dex to the privacy of the kitchens. Mel was the only one there and she was whistling softly at a containment chamber.

“Aww you poor thing, didn’t Dig feed you today?” Dex cooed and tried to push some food towards Mel but she whistled louder and put herself in front of the container.

“What is in there?” Mel’s whistling got louder. “Alright alright you demon we’ll leave you alone.”

“Do you think she’s okay? Should we call someone?” Dex sounded so worried V wanted to hug him harder.

“If we get out of this alive, I’ll take her to …a doctor?”

“Sure.”

“Hey.” V pulled Dex closer. “I want you here. We all want you here. You are a part of this team. We love you. I…I love you.” V whispered.

“V…”

***

“So who’s gonna die?” V and Dex burst into the main control room, flushed and rumpled.

“V!”

“Okay, that was insensitive but Dex noticed that we are disintegrating faster and we don’t have unlimited dust so what are we gonna do?” Alina bit her lip.

“What?”

“We are going to toss a coin?” Amani seemed confused by the suggestion. Dig was the only happy one present.

“Right.”

***

Amani’s hands shook. They  did not have a coin on board. No one in the crew was sentimental enough to carry one. So they were flipping a plate.

“This is stupid.” But her hands kept shaking.

She threw the plate into the air and it landed face down and shattered.

“Maybe someone should call it next time?” Nisha suggested gently.

Call what?

“Heads?”

Heads? Dig said uncertainly.

Another plate shattered on the floor and Amani won.

“Wait, is the winner going out or the loser?” Dex asked and Alina groaned.

***

Dig shrugged on the bio suit and then the space suit. Harpie tapped a few buttons on the panel in their control room. Dig had specifically requested to dress there.

We don’t have much time. I don’t want to tell others in case this fails but we have to try it.

Agreed. Harpie tapped a few more times. It might work.

Alright. No harm in trying.

Give me a second then.

***

Dex couldn’t watch. He clung to V and missed Dig’s cheeky salute as they floated away. The panel beeped to indicate that the escape pod was off. Dex rubbed at his face and sat down in his seat. He slowly shut down all but essential functions in his mind. The mechanical additions in his brain did not deal well with distress. They assumed that something was wrong with their host and tried to fix him in the worst ways possible.  He felt his limbs get heavier as the systems shut down one after the other. V’s arms were still around him, warm and soothing.

Dex flipped a few switches at Nisha’s command. The plan was simple. They would distract the shark when Dig got in place and once they started extracting the dust, the shark would turn to them and Star Catcher could turn tail and run. Dig would set off The Element once the shark was close enough so they didn’t have to worry about it following them. A very simple, foolproof plan. Dex’s gut clenched.

***

Dig enjoyed the flight out as much as they could. It was a nice place to be. It was a good enough place to die. They had a sliver of hope but the odds were stacked against. They did a few loops around the tip of the ship right around Amani’s station and heard a strangled sob from her. They opened a direct line of communication to her.

Amani, I need you to tell me how to activate The Element.

“DIG!”

Sorry, Ams. I couldn’t let you die but I need this information now before you leave.

In the group channel, Harpie announced that they had ten seconds before they went opposite ways.

“I hate you.”

No you don’t.

“No, I don’t.” Ams whispered and rattled off instructions.

***

Nisha angled the ship away from the star and towards the wormhole. It would take one quick blast of dust and they would be out but the timing had to be right. The shark was right on their tail. Dig fired up the harvester and the shark bellowed in rage. This time they felt the vibrations through the ship even if they couldn’t hear it.

“Ready, Dig?”

Yes.

Nisha choked on her next words but managed to get them out. “Last words?”

Nope.

“Fine.”

And they were off.

***

Dig watched the shark get torn up between following the ship or following the escape pod trailing the dust. They decided to make it worse. They had very little dust in the pod but the harvester was right there. It was already set up the best it could be. Dig attached a few canisters, turned it on and threw it as hard as they could away from the pod and sped up chasing it. The harvester sputtered at the lack of dust first but caught on the star and the canisters were filling up. The Element was heating up inside, everything blinking red.

Dig saw the shark move from the corner of their eyes.

Not yet. Not yet. Not yet.

The shark was close. They could see the array of teeth bigger than entire Star Catcher. It roared again making Dig shake.

Not yet. Not yet. Not yet.

The canisters on the harvester dinged. Dig dove after them abandoning the pod. They were close enough to land on top of the harvester easily. The shark opened its mouth wide and swallowed them all whole.

***

Alina slumped in her chair. The wormhole was right in front of them. An explosion sounded behind.

“Dig?” Dex whispered. The comms were all dead.

The ship moved forward before the shockwave could hit them.

The other side looked too normal, too simple, too nothing compared to what they left behind. The shockwave reached the wormhole and the beacons on this side sputtered at the ferocity of the blast.

The entire crew had collapsed. They had to leave. To get away before the shockwave raised an alarm but no one moved.

The smaller links worked alright, captain. Harpie said gently.

Bless them. Alina pulled herself up and assessed their situation.

One of the comms let out a strangled whine and something shot out of the wormhole.

***

Dex blinked through the haze of half functioning brain. They were out and safe. He just wanted to curl up and cry for a few days. But the comms were screaming and there was something out of the wormhole. It looked suspiciously like the tooth of a space shark.

Previous/ First / Next

#star catcher #chapter twenty #scifi #scifi series #wlw #mlmlm #polya #lgbtqa #my writing #nb #trans #nice shitty cliffhanger there for a nice shitty chapter #but my long long block is over and im celebrating #fuck yaaaaaaaaaah

[smilingformoney]

Endless Summer Diamond Scene: V.I.P. Lounge with Zahra and Craig

Zahra: Hell yeah. Craig +2 Craig: Let’s. Break. Down. This. Door! Craig rams the door with his shoulder. It doesn’t budge. Zahra sighs and pries open the keypad panel, examining the wires. Zahra: Do me a favour, Taylor. Keep Craig occupied for a few minutes, would you? I gotta work my skills on these wires. You: Are you sure you ought to be doing that drunk? Zahra: What’s the worst thing that could happen? I trip the wrong wire and 10,000 volts of electricity surge through my body, leaving you idiots screaming at the charred husk that is my corpse? You: Craig… is she kidding? I can’t tell if she’s kidding. Craig: I can never tell with her. Zahra squints, intensely focusing on the wires. A single sweatdrop streaks down her forehead. Zahra: Okay… red to green… need to watch the breaker… and… She clips two wires together with a spark! The doors slide open! Zahra: Slap my ass and call me Snape, because I just worked some magic! You and Craig stare at her. Zahra: …Tell anyone I said hat, and I’ll kill you both.

The three of you stroll into the gorgeous V.I.P. lounge. Dazzling lights sparkle in the ceiling, while a beautiful water feature bubbles in the center. And behind the bar, in a glass display case, sits an incredible selection of high-end alcohol. You: Okay, yeah, good call, Zahra. This was totally worth it. Zahra: Uh, duh? It’s called the V.I.P. Lounge. Of course it’s worth it. Now let me see what I can make us… Zahra takes two steps towards the bar, trips over a chair, and flops onto a couch. Zahra: On second thought, I’m just gonna lie here for a while. If someone could sorta just pour a drink into my mouth, that’d be great. Craig: Lessee what they’ve got here… some nice-ass vodka… like a crystal ball full of gin… and down in the fridge… Craig: A cheese tray! Oh hells yeah, they’ve got a cheese tray! You: Wait, Craig, you have no idea how old that is, maybe you should wait and… oh, never mind, I guess you already ate half of it. Craig: Mmmmmm, cheese… Zahra: Don’t bother, Taylor. Craig’s a human garbage disposal. One time freshman year, he ate a candy bar he’d dropped in a public hot tub. Craig: The water’s hot! That means it’s sterile! Zahra: Who. Taught. You. Science? You: So… you guys knew each other freshman year? The mood in the room instantly changes. Zahra and Craig glance at each other, uneasily… Zahra: We, uh… well, you know… Craig: I mean… we… there was… see…

You: Were you guys… -Friends? Craig +1, Zahra +1

Craig: Yeah… uh… friends… friendly friends… good ol’ friends… Zahra: Oh for god’s sake, Craig… we hooked up, Taylor. There. I said it. Are you happy now?

-A couple? Craig +1, Zahra +1

Craig: What? No! No no no! Definitely not! What a totally crazy, nuts, ridiculous thing to say! Zahra: Oh my god, Craig, don’t have a hernia. Yeah, we hooked up a few times. What’s the big deal?

Craig: I thought you didn’t want to tell people about that… Zahra: Yeah, well, maybe sometimes I just don’t have the energy to lie about it. You: Huh. I gotta admit, I have a hard time picturing you two together… Zahra: Yeah, well, we were different people back then. Just two dorky freshmen with no idea what to do, stuck in the same hall… Craig walks over and sits down next to Zahra. He hands her a glass of scotch on the rocks, and clinks his with hers. Craig: You had that blonde hair, remember? You’d always wear it in a ponytail, over that nerdy pony sweater… Zahra: Yeah, well, you were a total dork. You had glasses and a bowlcut and all you ever wanted to talk about was World of Warcraft… Craig: Please! Like you didn’t totally make a character just so we could raid Scholomance together. Zahra: Oh, I forgot all about… We wasted so many hours together… Zahra: …then your stupid football team started winning, and you and Sean became kinds of the school. And all you wanted to do was go to frat parties with perky little cheerleaders. Craig: You coulda come with me, you know. But no. You just wanted to hang out with those creepy hackers in the CS department. Zahra: At least they listened to me. They got what I had to say. She lets out a long sigh. Zahra: You think our Warcraft characters still exist? Just waiting around on some dusty server, remembering the good times? Craig: They’re probably pretty lonely. The two of them sit in a long, emotional silence. Finally, Zahra gets up and rubs at her eyes with the back of her hand. Zahra: Sun’s setting. We should probably get back to Raj. Craig: Yeah. Time to go. You: Hang on a sec. Let’s at least see if we can find that whiskey Raj wanted. You walk over to the shelf and browse it… You: Here it is! McLellyn’s! You start to put it into your bag, when you notice something strange on the bar. You: Huh… that’s weird. Craig: What’s up?

-Examine

You: Everything else in this room is all neatly put away… but there’s this one glass of half-drunk whiskey still on the bar. You: It’s like someone was here after it closed… just having a d rink by themselves. Furball growls at it, teeth bared… Furball: Grrrlllll… Zahra: Spooky! Maybe it was a ghoooooooooost… You: There’s a little piece of paper next to it… You: Project Hermes activation codes. Utilises satellite uplink at the L.H.O.’ You: And then there’s a bunch of random numbers and letters. CLUE FOUND You: Any idea what that means? Zahra: No idea. Now come on. Let’s get out of here before it gets all sentimental in here again.

#playchoices #choices stories you play #choices endless summer #choices es #endless summer

[nofomoartworld]

Hyperallergic: Just Say No: Politics and Refusal in ’80s-Inspired Literature

I’m listening to The Smiths as I read through Lauren Levin’s debut poetry collection, The Braid. The poems brim with pop cultural references, much of them retro because the author’s motherhood led her to relive her own childhood in the 1980s:

Alejandra sits on my lap and eats my cereal with me, dipping her spoon in and out

I quickly try to eat the blueberries before she gets them all I am more of a time-traveler. In that my emotions of parenting

Are like the forgotten emotions of my childhood piercing, loud, constant, stirring dissolute and selfish, self- and world-dissolving

For the most part, The Braid is composed of long-lined, whole-sentence tercets, although some sentences fray at the end, without a full-stop. The book is a patchwork of nine poems, with lines that run from one thought into the next. In “The Lens,” Levin mentions Dream Boys and Bastards from Hell, which leads me to think about British post-punk, which springboards into a mental list of all the things I refused to pay attention to growing up. I’m stubborn, y’all, and as a kid the best way to get me to do something was to tell me not to do it. This stubborn streak is how I came very late to the party where the Smiths are playing — which is to say that, for anyone who lived through the ’80s, these poems will take you back with them.

As it turns out, dogged stubbornness is a fitting characteristic for readers of this book, which weaves a complex tapestry of refusals. Take, for example, its Melissa-Febos-like refusal to choose between the body and intellectualism. On a recent panel about confessional writing, Febos, whose book Whip Smart chronicled her time as a professional dominatrix, declared, “If I’m writing something about my period, it doesn’t mean that I’m not an intellectual. I can be totally intellectual about my period. I can write an intellectual essay about my navel or a whole book about my period.” Levin’s book is living proof of Febos’s conviction, replete with the reality of that body, which holds onto its period for nine months. It contains an anxious body that lusts after its husband while growing another body within it — “my body fundraising somewhere down there.” It contains an adult body falling asleep next to a baby’s body; a breastfeeding body; the body symbolizing a storefront; and “the pain I feel continuing in these registers… a cash register of emotion.” It is stocked with the experience of a woman’s embodiment and it’s intellectual as hell. Take, for example, this short braided strand from the title poem, “The Braid,” which includes Reaganomics, a philosophical and Marxist configuration of time, an epistle, and a list of things one teaches a child:

A love that comes close to the world seems hard to imagine or a late style while the baby is still young When I was having uterine bleeding I wouldn’t write in red or wear pink underwear

I’m writing as fast as I can because I’ll never have much time left to write I’m writing in and out because I don’t know how else to weave Alli said if I don’t know what to do then write a letter —

Dear Sean Bonney, I came in late You were celebrating Thatcher’s death day I thought of Killer Mike (my favorite) I’m glad Reagan’s dead I felt secretive and inert

But also full of something beautiful and hectic I want to pour into her cup Money accumulates as time it pours out buys other time and the things I teach: Washing, cleaning, not going there, fish (wave hand), a cow says “Mmmmmm,”

Make a Y, put your hand on your head for the cow’s horn To build time, it goes on for a while, and with a settling in on fear Reagan’s welfare axe on the cover of Time Magazine

Time has too much intake, there’s no way to hold up structure long enough to build into it, too much outflow. I curse at people while I’m pregnant […]

The free association here is thick, a style that conjures a chain, as though the author is hopping from link to link. A single poem, “The Diamond Skull,” references Terminator 2, ACT-UP and David Wojnarowicz, Jeff Koons, and Marie Antoinette. Over the course of The Braid it becomes clear that her associations are less linear than circular. The strands of thought keep doubling back with so much density to their shape that the braid is discernible to the reader only with some distance.

Lauren Levin (courtesy the author)

The braid — whose form is predicated on a return — is a reminder that the past is woven into the present. This leads to the second thread of refusal in Levin’s book: refusing the artifice of the pastoral, Levin continually picks apart pastoral representations as staged, in order to refute their enticements — as fake news. While our longing may be real, we’re misdirecting it: there is no going back to a better time. The narrator watches her own yearning for Gondor, which, she points out, is really New Zealand. She notices that her repeated use of “California” signals a romantic ideal more than a specific location, like “Richmond” or “El Cerrito,” would. Levin punctures the veil of idyllic nostalgia in the same way that the Language Poets attacked the artifice of the “I” in poems with a meditative structure.

Longing for the good ole days shows up in our present lives in pernicious ways. In the wake of the 2016 presidential campaign, it feels eerily prescient to read Levin’s critique of Reagan-era politics. She calls Reagan a “forgetful […] Blissed-out shepherd” while recounting his presidential visit to the Bitburg Cemetery in Germany where a large number of SS members were interred. Readers may recognize our present era in these pages, which make visible white supremacist dog whistles and strains of neoliberalist thinking. “I started writing these poems to think about that phrase / ‘a Reagan childhood,’” the poem “Return of the King” declares.

And what does the author conclude? That while the “old days” may not have been so good, they also aren’t gone. Like the graves of SS soldiers in the background of a ceremonial tribute to heroism and sacrifice in WWII, specters of the past and repercussions from it continue to thread themselves into the present. In a sense, Levin’s weaving of Reaganomics, childhood, parenthood, and an undead, pastoral return seems a close cousin to Joyelle McSweeney’s formulation of the necropastoral. The Braid reminds us that the pastoral gaze is a living grave inside every one of us.

The Braid (2016) by Lauren Levin is published by Krupskaya and is available from Amazon and other online booksellers.

The post Just Say No: Politics and Refusal in ’80s-Inspired Literature appeared first on Hyperallergic.

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