#i almost started crying when i went Chipotle and i misheard the cashier

[moonjade]

I’m genuinely so fucking bad at reading social cues and it’s really hard for me to hear what people say to me (especially if there are other noises in the environment, idk how else to explain other than there being too many sounds), so I’ve been in so many awkward social situations recently and it makes me want to die 😃

#text #personal #i had a really awkward experience the past two times i went out and it’s eating me up inside #i also really hate when people try to joke with me or are sarcastic because half the time i don’t pick up on it and it makes me want to cry #i almost started crying when i went Chipotle and i misheard the cashier #i thought she asked me how i was doing so i said good hby? and she gave me literally the weirdest look #and she said ‘no i was asking if you wanted anything else’ #so i just apologized and said no i didn’t and she looked at me weird #and told me how to find the napkins and forks and i felt so fucking embarrassed lol #that’s why i usually order from the app even though they manage to fuck up my order every single time #anyways i’m ranting bc i feel like total shit and want to die 😃😃😃😃 #and i’m adding more bc i want to get tested for adhd but idk how to bc we don’t have insurance and i haven’t seen in a doctor in 2 years #plus I’ve gained 40+ pounds over quarantine and i just know that the doctor will tell me that all of my problems are because of my weight #so it’s like. why bother going to a doctor. the past few doctors I’ve been to have never listened to my concerns #just told me to lose weight/sleep better/drink more water #wow i can’t believe i paid $50 to hear you tell me to lose weight 😃 #ok end rant bc i’m annoying