#i also used 2 be able to pop out those mfs in no time i made sims like crazy but now it takes me 4 tries 2 make 1 sim | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

katethevampire · 3 months

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All right so the new episodes just came out like 20 minutes ago for me (oh yeah me from the future here it ended up taking me about 3 hours to finish watching the episodes cuz I kept pausing to write stuff in between so uh yeah lol) so everything under the cut will be my live reaction to everything. I'll add time stamps so you know where I'm at in the episodes. I can guarantee you that I will be sticking to my promise about potentially eating paper if I'm wrong about Sir Pentious not dying. Which honestly now I'm not sure if anyone will die, it was pretty much confirmed in a live stream that angel dust isn't going to be the one to die so my money is on one of the Angels. Also I'm using voice to text and while I'll try and fix any misspellings or wrong words I might miss them.

LOTS OF SWEARING PROBABLY also I very much abuse capslock

EPISODE 7

00:51- I love Sir Pentious looking at Keke I just thought I should mention that

01:03- OH MY GOD NO KEKE MOVED TO HIS LAP AND HE'S PETTING HER I LOVE HIM SM

01:10 aw Alastor was sleepy you guys woke him up!

01:22- I CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE RAZZLE AND DAZZLE BEING CUTE CHARLIE IS CRYING

01:29- he did the gay little hand thing

01:50- okay so I've already seen this part because of the small leak but I cannot get over the fact that Alastor has his shoes on the bed!! Like man take those off you're getting it dirty!!!!

01:59- mfs kicking his feet on the bed acting like a high school girl about to ask out her crush on the phone at a sleepover like dude you're a serial killer you can't do this to me 😭 also I should probably slow down cuz I'm making an update literally every 2 seconds

02:18 BROS CHECKING HIS NAILS AND DOING THAT POSE WHILE MAKING FUN OF HER ABOUT THE FACT THAT SHE UNINTENTIONALLY MIGHT HAVE CAUSED THE DEATHS OF MILLIONS 💀💀💀 so fruity i love

2:33- Alasto be like "it's called masking deary. Ever heard of it?"

2:44- if he wasn't saying this in such an evil manner right now I'd be saying he's so me frfr

3:07- what do I even say to that line. He popped off but also like respectfully I think I've heard a third grader say the exact same thing

3:53- OKAY SO I WAS GOING TO SAY SOMETHING BUT I'VE COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN LOOK AT THIS FRAME, this could easily be the profile picture for someone's film review channel and I'm not 100% sure that people will understand what I mean by that unless you know a very specific person

04:38- Alastor is in his hat man era

4:33- okay so a few things, thank you subtitles for telling me that the music is edgy I feel like just the word tense would have worked on its own but I appreciate it nonetheless. Number two, I don't like seeing the girlies be mad at each other :(

05:34 I will support my boy Sir Pentious through and through he did nothing wrong!!

06:54- not the voice I was expecting for Rosie but pop up Queen she speaks the truth

07:24- ROSIE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE ALASTOR. Also his confusion, I love him so much

11:04- she's kind of like that one Pokemon

Ad time!- I DON'T CARE ABOUT VITAMIN PILLS THAT DOUBLE MY LIFESPAN

11:13- catabettes! Cannibals and catabettes!!! This is going into my vocabulary from now on. Also this frame that I paused at I love her face.

11:57- ugh, susan. All my homies hate Susan

12:54- I have a dream, I'm here to cause a scandal in the cannibal square

13:37- :( well it wasn't obvious to me I just thought the x over the eye was to look cool :(

14:35- SONG FUCK YEAH

15:26 If this song came out years ago I know for a fact there would have been an undertale parody version of it. Also I just got a cosmic brownie and some chocolate milk let's go guys we're eating good tonight

16:00 HOLY FUCKING SHIT SHE CAN JUST GROW BACK HER WINGS

16:30- therapist Rosie is not something I thought I'd be seeing today but honestly I love it. Also I don't think I'm going to be able to finish these episodes today because I'm only a little over 15 minutes through and I've been watching for like almost over half an hour and also I just realized that what if Lucifer is the one that dies?

18:12 ALASTOR GAVE HER HIS MICROPHONE I'M GOING TO EXPLODE INTO A BAJILLION CRYING PIECES RAHHHHHH

19:38 I'm going crazy I'm going insane right now bro literally what how I don't know what to say I love this act I don't know, it's just really good I don't know what to say like this is cool I don't I DON'T KNOW! IT'S I I LIKE IT everybody in cannibal town is cool and I like them and it's like 10 seconds later now and they're literally So based like free food like so me I don't know I'm just rambling at this point

20:56 ALASTOR AND ROSIE'S LITTLE DANCE THEIR LITTLE TIPPY TAPS OH MY GOD YES

21:06- alastor, you know it's not right to make someone your political puppet. Your little dances are cute though so I'll allow it for now.

I don't know why it thought I was speaking Spanish for a second but anyways that episode was really cute and good and I liked it but I'm also scared for the next episode cuz like now I'm wondering is someone actually going to die or were people just lying. I feel like either Adam is going to be the one to die or it's going to be Lucifer cuz they mentioned a lot in the previous episode about how Charlie needs to take up the throne and get ready to take her place on the throne like why does she need to take her place on the throne? Isn't that her dad's job??? Please don't kill Lucifer off please please please 🙏 also I'm still not on board and probably will never will be on the whole political puppet thing. Like I just know I just have a feeling in my bones that alastor's favor is going to be something like "Let me be the ruler of hell lololol" or something anyways

EPISODE 8

01:01-Why are you watching other men get fucked?🤨 (/j)

01:19 🥺 I love 🥺 I oove him so 🥺 so much 🥺🥺🥺 does he have a spatula like spongebob

02:02- wait so how is Vox watching them like does he have bug cameras in the air like those little guys in v3 (woah now I have to put a Danganronpa spoiler on this)

03:42 SOFT ALASTOR FANFICTION WRITERS QUICK WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN!!!

04:18- I'm not even the biggest huskerdust shipper but awwwww also I don't ship him with anyone but I just want to see Sir Pentious happy pleaseeee also the little Melody of loser baby in the background

04:48- ugh I am clutching my heart right now Sir Pentious is my SON and I LOVE HIM

04:58- what the fuck that ao3 tag was canon this WHOLE TIME???? WHEN DID YOU GUYS HEAR ABOUT THIS?????

05:05- I told you angel dust wasn't going to die

05:38- it's like the song but different! Reprise it's called a reprise also is Mimzy gonna come back

07:15- Vox, you know that you guys are going to die if they lose too right?

Okay I can't timestamp this cuz I'll just be pausing every 2 seconds but just know that everything I'm saying after this is from 07:52 to whatever number I put after later right here->09:47

Okay, so this might be a weird comparison but you know like My Little pony Battle scenes? This feels like that in the very best way possible where they have the scenes with all the different characters fighting with the different music.

Oh my God yes Cherry bomb and angel dust I love them also that was a fire transition also I JUST NOTICED THAT SIR PENTIOUS HAT ALSO HAS THE EYE DOES HE JUST HAVE I HATS FOR EVERY OCCASION

Uh oh Adams angry he's going to do a my hero academia

Oh shit it actually worked that's not good.

I TOLD YOU I CALLED IT VOX IS HORNY

Oh my God that is such a cool shot guys someone should make that frame of Alastor their computer background

OH MY GOD WHOEVER ANIMATED THAT SCENE I LOVE YOU I'M LITERALLY GIVING YOU A METAPHORICAL KISS ON THE MOUTH IN THE PLATONIC SENSE ALASTOR LOOKED SO COOL

Guys I think Adam's going to die

😨 okay so Alastor's microphone just broke and I paused it to add that emoji but as I did the people I live with got home so I'm going to have to pause it for there? I'll update if I get prime working on my phone. Also isn't alastor's microphone alive? Maybe that's the character that died.

Update: all right I got it set up on my phone about 30 minutes later now we're resuming

09:47- okay so I think it's interesting that Alastor pretty much lost all his powers as soon as his microphone broke, my guess is probably that whoever has his soul (lilith, eve, or anyone else) gave the mic to him.

09:53- I like the detail that Alastor is still smiling even though he literally just got slammed against the wall, also Vox has the biggest hate boner for Alastor like

10:02- Alastor: "Have to disagree with you there, radio's not dead." Hun you are bleeding out I'm sorry but I don't think you can gaslight girlboss your way out of this one, also I'm sorry to tell you but the only thing they play on my local radio station now besides music is like, a show that's only on at like 7 in the morning where people call to complain about how their husband wraps Christmas presents

10:38- haha silly also EGGS!!

10:43- NO WAIT MY BRAIN DIDN'T REGISTER THAT THAT EGG WAS CRACKED THEY KILLED THE FUCKING EGG!!!!!! Angel, kill them.

11:12- no no no Sir Pentious you better not I don't want to eat paper

11:21- good for him

11:44- NO GOD DAMN IT PLEASE HAVE A REVEAL THAT ALASTOR OR LUCIFER OR SOMEONE ELSE SAVED HIM PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏 I AM BEGGING ON MY HANDS AND KNEES

12:03- okay this is really cool but is he actually dead cuz I'll legitimately be really sad if so

12:50- *that one vine* "*gasp* Adam."

13:23- KILL HIS ASS CHARLIE

14:12 yes Vaggie, queen shit

SIR PENTIOUS ARE YOU DEAD /J OR /SRS?????

14:35 I KNEW IT I KNOW HE WAS GOING TO COME BACK I MEAN I GOT KIND OF SPOILED CUZ I I SAW THE COVER OF THE EPISODE BUT WOAH 10/10 ENTRANCE

14:44- gasp! His face!

15:00- he is, so stupid. I love him.

15:51-okay I went quiet for a minute cuz there were so much happening but oh my God what do I even say this is just so cool also I don't know if this is intentional or not but the blood stain on Charlie's hair is shaped like an apple

16:34- NIFFTY RAHHHHHHH

17:08- wait okay I had a brief thought that maybe lute was actually Eve but I think I'm wrong on that

17:13- Sir Pentious would've liked pancakes :((((((

Ad Time! I don't care about hard Rock Cafe I just want to know whether or not Sir Pentious is actually dead please I'm going through all the stages of grief right now and Brandan Rogers just came on my screen as Katie killjoy please

18:04- Keke :(

Oh my God they're going to find him in the rubble right? ... Right?? Right guys right???????

18:10- fat nuggets survived that's good I see a rock that looks suspiciously shaped like Sir Pentious military hat whoa guys I wonder if that means anything and it looks like it's up like someone is standing? Whoa I wonder if they'll check behind that rock please

18:16- wait is he actually dead I'm genuinely about to cry

19:16- I am not crying about his death until the episode ends I am not crying until it is 100% CONFIRMED that he died

20:50- omg alastor's alive, he's in his Jack's skeleton era that means that maybe Sir Pentious is also-

21:08- friends :) he said friends just saying

22:04- I TOLD YOU I FUCKING TOLD YOU I TOLD YOU THAT BY DYING IT WAS JUST A CHARACTER BEING REDEEMED I TOLD YOU I'M SO SMART I'M NOT EATING PAPER HAHAHAHAHA I'M THE GREATEST MAN ALIVE HE'S NOT DEAD MY SNAKE BOY ISN'T DEAD HOW DID I GET SO ATTACHED TO HIM I DON'T KNOW BUT I LOVE HIM YES I CAN'T EXPRESS MY EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW I'M GENUINELY SO HAPPY THIS IS WHY THIS IS WHY I WAITED UNTIL THE VERY END TO CRY ABOUT HIM I KNEW HE WASN'T GOING TO BE DEAD THEY WOULDN'T KILL HIM OFF THEY WOULDN'T KILL MY SNAKE BOY OFF JUST LIKE THAT

22:34- you're telling me Lilith was just doing hot girl shit on the beach for 7 years.

#alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #angel dust hazbin hotel #charlie hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel sir pentious #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel episode 7 spoilers #hazbin hotel episode 8 spoilers #hazbin hotel lucifer #liveblogging #danganronpa v3 spoilers #i guess #I started watching the episodes at around 8:20 and finished the last episode at around 11:18 so almost exactly 3 hours #anyways I'm so smart and got a bunch of stuff right #just realized I didn't mention husk a single time outside of the ship mention #sorry dude I think you're a cool guy I just didn't have anything to say

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ballorawan740 · 3 years

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SCP Scenarios: When they get scared by the reader (REQUESTED)

Requested by: @_Milla_7849_

SCP 073 (Cain)

I feel like Cain normally wouldn't be scared

Like if you made him watch a horror movie, he might flinch slightly but wouldn't be terrified of it

So when you try to scare him like a prank sort of way, he would flinch a little more than usual but would recover seconds later

Like that one time when he was alone walking down the hallway looking zoned out since he was thinking of something

And you just crept up to him like the sneaky little child you are and jumped onto his back

He did get a load yelp but realised it was you

Luckily for you, Cain didn't give you a lecture like before and actually laughed with you

However, if you were kidnapped or taken hostage or used for an experiment, it would obviously frighten him and he wouldn't forgive himself

So to prevent this, he would keep you within his line of sight at all times

Anyways, as I've mentioned before, Cain would probably also give you a tight hug after your little stunt and unbeknownst to him, the researchers recorded it for a laugh

Cain did give you a lecture but forgave you since you were so young and he couldn't resist those eyes

And the researchers did give you some sweets

SCP 076-2 (Abel)

Now, a warrior like Abel wouldn't be so easily frightened

Especially if it was a child, even more so if it's you since he knows you too well and has personally trained you from the age of 5

Basically, Abel would notice your movement and body language well since you're both stuck together

So you have devices a plan with your scientist friends to try and scare him

And yes, it's working

Because Abel got extremely distracted by Iris

Iris basically got yahooted into this mess and was told to wear a lingerie

Yes, you did scare him by shoving him into Iris

I wouldn't say he got a scare, but more like a surprise

Poor girl she just wanted to sleep

SCP 999 (Tickle Monster) 999 would most likely be scared the easiest out of everyone on this list

Aside from Glass

He's like a close second

Back to 999, you both were just chilling and wandering around the facility aimlessly

Because yall are boring (TBF you're both trapped in this giant mf blop of a building)

Anyways, let's just say that it was Bright and Clef who introduced you to the world of pranks and you guys thought it would be funny to scare our 999 here

Basically, yall decided to play dead and then pretend to turn into zombies with some makeup

Yes, it did work since you've managed to scare the living daylights out of 999

And he was about to have a cardiac arrest (if he even has a biological heart)

And yes, it almost ended in another breach

And 999 did give you a lecture on how to not scare people like that

He does sound like a grandpa though XD

SCP 682 (Hard to Destroy Reptile)

I would say that scaring 682 would be difficult, but I won't since he's already terrified of that rabbit

You, along with the other researchers, thought it'll be fun to pull a prank on 682 in form of a magic trick

It's a classic rabbit in the hat trick and yes, you did pull SCP 524 out of the hat

But, little did your tiny brain know, that rabbit basically eats everything, including itself

So you just watched 524 approaches the already terrified 682 and nibble on his feet

And yes, you and the other researchers laughed hard since he crawled up the wall to get away from the rabbit (I'm now officially adopting 524 as my other pet)

Sadly, 524 didn't stay for long since another doctor needed him for a test with Josie (yes, the cat)

682 basically shouted at you for doing such a thing on him, your dad

But you ignored him anyways since you knew he never meant what he said and he wouldn't be mad at you for long

SCP 049 (Plague Doctor)

Our bird boy here is pretty much neutral when it comes to being scared

Like, he can be quite unfazed by many things, so it's no surprise if you or any other SCPs tried to jump on him

So as part of an experiment, you and your friends had decided that you would try to play dead and see if 049 would be terrified

Well, 049 was somewhat concerned and when you carried on playing dead, he became scared since you weren't so conscious, or so he thought

Since you played dead extremely well for such a young child, he tried to see if he could fix you

And before he could do anything, you jumped up at him like Bonnie from FNAF

Yes, he looked like he jumped out of his skin and was so stunned that he just sat in the corner with his head down for an hour

You all had to check up on him and he said he was 'fine'

He wasn't

049 gave you a lecture about playing dead like that unless there's a dangerous SCP

SCP 035 (Possessive Mask)

Now, since 035 is a mask and is very much a master manipulator and an award-winning actor/actress, you would most likely be able to take on those traits from him

When you were younger, you were eager to learn from 035, who you see as not only your best friend but also an idol, so he taught you everything he could

As you got older, you've gotten better at manipulation and acting, so much so that even 035 couldn't tell if you were just being you from time to time

So one day, you've decided to prank your dad because you were hella bored (like you always are :((( cuz yall never be productive and just sit on your flat bum all day and watch YouTube, Netflix or play games then sleep)

You basically produced a fake body of yourself and wrapped it in a black bag and sent it to 035's cell

Then, you've got one of your researcher buddies to write a note of your passing and that you do love him very much

035 did receive the message and made sure that there was a dead body in the package

He was pretty much convinced that it was you since you were able to disguise the fake body like bone and flesh

Which of course scared him to death because he was about to attack everyone on site

Luckily you got there on time to stop him which freaked him out and yes, you've gotten a lecture about being such a prankster (You got grounded for life but that didn't stop a rebellious child like you)

At least everyone at the facility has gotten a laugh about it for the next 3 months

SCP 105 (Iris)

Pranking Iris wouldn't be hard, but that doesn't mean she's fazed, but not in a sense like 049 who wouldn't get a good scare from some SCPs which could do him harm

Iris is very much a self-aware and open-minded individual who has common sense (unlike you, who don't even move out of your bed or even use your non-existent brain cells)

She's very much like every other person you'll meet on the streets who wouldn't just believe the first thing that she hears since she is very much a rational person

So, if you want to devise a plan to scare her, it'll have to blend in with everything or be quiet out there with realistic effects

You'll have to use your head to think of a good prank to scare her, which you did since you've inherited her intelligence (that's a lie because you don't have any intelligence left in you)

As her child, you have decided to prank her by making her a fake copy of her camera but instead of her being able to control objects within the photo, she would end up destroying it

You gave it to her as a gift and she accepted it with suspicion since you don't normally get her anything and encouraged her to try it (you're such an ungrateful child)

Cain, Dr Glass, Dr Kondraki and a couple of others wanted to see as well, so they stayed and watch

Much to everyone's horror, the illusion camera did exactly how you designed it to and Iris was furious and saddened

Later on, you told her about the prank since you feel bad and she was extremely mad

So instead of grounding or lecturing you, she decided to have revenge

SCP 106 (Old Man)

Now, scaring this old man would be rather interesting because he doesn't seem too fazed by the other, more dangerous and unpredictable, SCPs

But, you can still scare him to a certain degree

I mean, he is an old man after all, so scaring him would be fun

As long as you don't give him a heart attack then it's fine I guess (cuz yall be evil for scaring such an old man)

So, you have decided to scare 106 by giving off little bits of harmless pranks at first so 106 would let his guard down for a moment

Like, giving him a box full of spiders (he's quite disgusted by them just like how he sees your face every time) and popping an air-filled bag (Don't lie, you've all done it and it's hella fun)

Later on, you would gradually move to play with the more dangerous things, such as getting him to look at a picture of 096's face (Probs ugly like yo-)

As time moved on, 106 seemed to be relaxed and expected you to bring him random things and soon realised that there was something off

You didn't show up to him for almost a week and he was ready to get his dad mode on

Luckily, some of the guards caught you with Abel and got 106 involved since they were afraid of causing a massive breach

106 panicked and picked you up, giving you a lecture on how you shouldn't be with other SCPs like Abel

You managed to tell him that you've befriended Abel and he was stunned and gave him the dad glare (you know the one where dads would give to warn others to not hurt their kids right?)

And because it's Abel, he would even make sure to be with you whenever you were with him which made it difficult for you to play with Abel because he might steal you away (Yes I'm looking at you right now kiddo, don't play with Abel)

So in conclusion, if the prank involves you being in a dangerous position, he wouldn't necessarily be scared but would start to panic about your safety

SCP 096 (Shy Guy)

I think 096 would be similar to 106 in a sense but less logical and unfazed

It's more like he would be pretty panicky every time you weren't there with him and his anxiety would act up (like you every time you're preparing for your exams where you didn't even revise)

Like if you were with Safe class SCPs, he would be more relaxed than you being with a Euclid class, but it kinda depends on who it is

If it was Cain then it would be fine, but if you were to be with 173, he would be quite wary at first and would tell you to try and avoid being with that peanut

So if you wanted to scare him, it wouldn't be too hard

All you had to do was to be with another Keter class SCPs and play with them

He would be extremely cautious and terrified if you were with one and knowing this, you've decided that playing with 682 instead of playing with Walter the rabbit (SCP 524 | He's my other pet), you've decided to go up and pet 682

When 096 got a hold on the commission on you being with that lizard, he ran out of his cell, causing a huge containment breach on the way like he's bulletproof, and went yeehaw with 682

All you did was sit there in confusion as they entertained you with some pole dancing

Basically, if you scare 096, he would go from anxious to paranoid to berserk then to we're all going down to hell and back again

Dr Jack bright

This mf right here is unpredictable af

Like in his own body, he would remain unfazed and would even go as far as pranking you back

I mean he still would act all fun and games but since he can possess multiple bodies, the outcome of him being scared would vary which would surprise him too since he wouldn't know

Unless he decided to possess someone he knows well, but he knows better than to do that

Dr Bright would most notably be scared, like everybody else on the list, if you were to put yourself in immediate danger, but since you were just as crazy as your dad, he would most likely go along with it until you deliver your prank

Like, you could be juggling knives while standing on top of 682's head while singing 'Painted Smile' by Madam Macabre (If you haven't heard it, you should, it's amazing)

Also, he would sometimes find you having your back faced towards peanut and still be fine after having your neck being snapped (Yall be like surprise mf)

Anyways, one time Jack had made a promise to you to meet you at a certain place and he was late

So you stormed into his office (like the entitled little nugget you are) and went 'tick-tock mf' to your dad

Well it worked and you showed him your trick with the Keter classes

By causing a containment breach and somehow you managed to bribe the Keter classes to perform with you

Let's just say that just because you've inherited his craziness doesn't mean that you could go as far as doing this prank

Bright was about to drop dead from a heart attack and he banned you from doing such things in the future

Dr Simon Glass

With Simon Glass, you could give him a fright relatively easily

Just because he's a psychologist and can read people rather well, he still would be terrified and paranoid about whatever you were planning on doing

Even if he told you not to

Like that time when you were told to not make toast because you can't cook and you almost burnt the whole facility and Glass stood there and said "I told you so" (he did ask for toast, as in toasted bread, not toasted humans)

Anyways, being the child of Simon Glass meant that you would learn a lot about the human mind and behaviour

He would teach you everything you were curious about and would sometimes ask Diogenes, Light, Kondraki, Cain and Iris to help teach you the things he wouldn't have much knowledge on

And sometimes Clef and Bright would appear and spoil you (not that Glass doesn't, he's just busy and trying to be the best dad he could by being anxious about you being alone in the facility with so many dangerous SCPs)

So this often meant that you, Bright and Clef would pull pranks on each other, usually on Kondraki and Iris

Except for this time, you've decided to pull a prank on your dad, Dr Glass

You've handed him over a realistic model of SCP 058 and he freaked out and called the MTFs

They've checked the model and realised that it was all fake and poor Simon had a heart attack from you

Simon was about to yeet that spider looking thing but it was able to move so he planned to carry you and yeet you both out

He did give you a lecture on doing that stunt and you did shed a few crocodile tears

And yes, Glass gave in and comforted you

He then went to grab Clef and Bright's ears and lectured them about helping you make the prank

Dr Alto Clef

I feel like Clef would be similar to Bright but without the whole process of changing bodies because of some curse

Like Clef wouldn't be all that scared since he's dealt with SCPsbefore and dies an extremely good job at it

So for Clef to be scarred for life, it'll either be an extremely dangerous SCP, he's drunk and/or high, he must care about you a lot and you must've been out of your mind to do something seriously stupid or you're evil enough to piss off a Simon Glass (Or all of the above if you're evil enough)

You would most likely want to take the easier and quicker route out of all the ones mentioned on the list which is to put yourself in an immediate danger

So you had asked Dr Bright for some help and so he did

Moments later, midway through preparing your prank, Clef came to Bright asking if he saw you and he did

However, they heard a familiar scream from down the hallway and they both rushed to your aid and soon realised that it's you

You were about to get eaten by 939 and they had to signal for the MTFs to help (Because you mfs didn't ask me for permission when you wanted to pet 939 D:<)

Clef gave you a big lecture and comforted you after he cooled down

Bright on the other hand wasn't so lucky as Clef wanted to murder him (But in his defence, you didn't tell Bright how dangerous the prank was cuz yall are as stubborn as a rock)

Dr Benjamin Kondraki

Kondraki would be pretty much average when it comes to being scared but with a little more logical since he works with the Foundation

He's that type of dad who would let you go to sleepovers every now and again as long as they weren't of the opposite gender (Unless yall are Bi, Gay, Lesbian, Pan, Alien, Basketball etc then he's screwed)

We support BLM and LGBTQ+ in this community and anyone who says otherwise must leave now

Heck, even our friends here, especially Kondraki, Glass, Bright, 999, Cain, Iris and Josie (SCP 529, my new pet) supports them

Anyways, back to the main plot

Depending on what age you're at and whether you were planning to prank him with the Foundation staff or SCPs will lead to a different outcome

Like if you told him you were dating someone he would've died right there and then

No dating until you're 50

Anyhow, you've decided that it'll be funny to scare your dad with Clef and Bright by getting his Bootyflies to shapeshift into various Keter class SCPs and acting like it

And yes, you somehow managed to persuade the Bootiflies to do just that

And no, Kondraki didn't know about this even though he found it odd that his bootiflies didn't obey him that day

You got Kondraki to sit down in a room with Clef while you and Bright was setting up everything

The bootyflies shifted into the Scarlet King and boy sis Kondraki called the MTFs and was boutta shoot him

Everyone in the room had to get him to stop and that it was just a prank (And by everyone I mean just you, Bright and Clef)

Kondraki did manage to stop and was boutta drag you out for a big girl/boy lecture

Well, he did but not before kicked Bright and Clef in their privates first

Needless to say, nobody wanted to prank Kondraki again (Shush, no you don't, yes I'm looking at you from behind the screen and I know that you'll do it again)

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0aurelion-sol0 · 3 years

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"There's no place like gnome."

Stranger Things 3: The Game.

Gnomes 1-10. 🧙‍♂️

IT'S FINALLY HERE!

It's no secret that the Duffers take a lot of inspirations from Pop Culture. From the most well known movies to the more obscure comics, they are always able to sneak a reference somewhere everytime. And they are also able to make it connected to the story.

I've bragged about how the Stranger Things expanded universe in media is one of the best out there compared to many others. I think that the Duffers, the writers or people in the highest places of the marketing are really paying attention to what comes out of the ST franchise because there is no way to have such content with so many details without someone looking into them.

And ST3: The Game is a very good example of that.

So let's start! The first 10 Gnomes out of 50 that you have to find in the game.

BE AWARE THAT THERE ARE SPOILERS BELOW!

"There's elements that could please those who makes metas/analyzes or theories. Especially things related to possible future plot points, easter eggs, references in previous seasons mainly season 3 like unsolved mysteries or unanswered questions and for future seasons such as season 4 like foreshadowing or teasers, trailers or as of lately the sneak peek."

If you have anything you'd like to add, might think I have missed or think it might be referencing something else don't hesitate to share it by commenting or reblogging.

(Say thanks to @hawkinsschoolcounselor for having helped me with some of them. )

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Gnome #1: Johnny

"He's here... with an axe."

Overall plot:

"The film's central character is Jack Torrance, an aspiring writer and recovering alcoholic who accepts a position as the off-season caretaker of the isolated historic Overlook Hotel in the Colorado Rockies. Wintering over with Jack are his wife, Wendy Torrance, and young son, Danny Torrance. Danny is gifted with "the shining", psychic abilities that enable him to see into the hotel's horrific past. The hotel cook, Dick Hallorann, also has this ability and is able to communicate with Danny telepathically. The hotel had a previous winter caretaker who went insane and killed his family and himself. After a winter storm leaves the Torrances snowbound, Jack's sanity deteriorates due to the influence of the supernatural forces that inhabit the hotel, placing his wife and son in danger."

So I assume a lot of you know The Shining by Stanley Kubrick. A movie which was adapted from the novel of the same name by Stephen King in 1977.

There's a lot of things that could have served as an inspiration for ST.

A boy/child who has psychic abilities = Eleven has psychic abilities such as telekinesis. Will has his True Sight which consist in seeing what the MF was seeing and feeling.

Now there's also the theme of family and parenthood that is also a big theme in Stranger Things. Especially abusive parenthood such as Brenner, Lonnie and even Hopper to a smaller degree.

In Shining, Jack tries to kill his family with an axe due to supernatural forces that are in the hotel but there's a difference between King and Kubrick. While King specifically said that Jack was heavily influenced by the Hotel, Kubrick shows that Jack always had that sinister violence in him even before they arrived at the hotel.

It's interesting to draw a parallel to Billy and Will, both characters called William who tried to kill their families and other people while being possessed. But Billy compared to Will was shown to have been abusive even before that. Dacre Montgomery also said that he was inspired by Jack Nicholson's performance in the Shining for his character Billy.

Joyce and Jonathan were shown to get ready to fight the monsters by taking an axe.

It's also interesting to note that Jack dies in the snow while a blizzard is happening outside the hotel. Much like the storm of the Mindflayer who is in the Upside Down, the same Mindflayer who "likes it cold". While in the book, the Overlook explodes and burn.

(Cold vs Fire much like everything Upside Down related not liking Fire.)

Also "Johnny" = "Jonathan", it's kind of similar and Jonathan did wield an axe before. Maybe this is teasing parts of Jonathan storyline next seasons ?

The gnome was also found in Mike's basement, Mike who wants to be a writer when he's older just like Jack.

Let's just hope that Jonathan and Mike don't get the same fate as Jack.

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Gnome #2: Christine

"Two bright, beaming lights for eyes."

Overall plot:

"Written by Bill Phillips and based on Stephen King's 1983 novel of the same title, the movie follows the changes in the lives of Arnie Cunningham, an awkward and unpopular teenager, his friends, his family, and his teenage enemies in Rockbridge, California after Arnie buys a classic red and white 1958 Plymouth Fury named Christine, licence number CQB 241, a car that seems to have a jealous, possessive personality – and a mind of its own, which has a bad influence on Arnie. After working on a car in a junkyard owned by Will Darnell, Arnie drops his glasses, starts dressing like a 1950's greaser and develops an arrogant and paranoid personality. He than decides to invite and date the most beautiful girl in highschool, Leigh, who will soon become the next victim of Christine."

I was actually quite surprised by how this story parallels Stranger Things a lot.

First off, Christine is very much like The Mindflayer, a dangerous supernatural being set out to destroy anyone who is in her way, the people who tries to take the things that she thinks belongs to her or threatens her. This is very much relevant to The Mindflayer who after being hurt by the Fire created by the Hawkins Lab was upset and attacked everyone he could. Or as Will putted "Not me, everyone else."

This is very much like Christine who tried to kill Leigh because she was taking her place in the life of Arnie. Christine also tried to kill the bullies of Arnie who after a conflit with him, tried to destroy the car which angered Christine heavily.

The Mindflayer has been described someone who views himself as superior to other species and wants to conquer them, even if it's not his real "goal", the description fits anyone who is possessive and paranoid.

Both the MF and Christine are associated with the color red. Red storm = red color of the car.

Arnie ressembles Will and Billy alot. Will is an awkward and unpopular teenager who after being possessed by the Mindflayer became very different and more violent. Billy was shown to be paranoid, jealous, violent and his look even ressembles the one Arnie takes after repairing Christine.

Both of these boys have the same name as Will Darnell, the owner of a junkyard. Just like the boys in Season 1 who takes shelter in a junkyard, or in season 2 where they fight the Demodogs.

Billy dies, killed by the Mindflayer just like Arnie who was completely possessed by Christine who tried to kill Leigh and Dennis, his best friend after they tried to destroy the car when they realised the supernatural nature of it.

Billy's car ressembles a lot Christine with those lights on. Especially with shots like in the Void or at Starcourt during the night.

Chrissy, a new character that will be in season 4, the most popular girl in Hawkins High like Leigh, has a name that is the diminutive of Christine. It is said that under the perfect surface lies a dark secret. Much like the car Christine, while a beauty is actually a dangerous supernatural being. We'll see if the both of them actually connects in the show.

Also it is set in California where Billy and Max come from and has been rumored by many people due to set leaks (The Surfer Boy Pizza Van.) that it is where the Byers went. I won't get into it in this post but this could be a tease or hint of that IF the set leaks ARE true and not fake to mess with people and the fandom.

Arnie also dies in a car crash having been completely possessed by the evil powers of Christine which is something we see in the sneak peek of ST4. It also reminds of Carrie who has a bully named Chris who she kills in a car crash with her boyfriend Billy aka William.

So will someone die from that car crash ? Who is it ? Chrissy, Joyce, Lonnie ? We can only speculate.

The gnome is also found outside the Wheeler's house where Karen lives near the community pool where Billy works and where the car of Billy is located during the first few chapters of the game. Again, a "bad boy" hitting on the beautiful girl in town. (with a lot of creepy subtext all over it.)

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Gnome #3: Doc

"Always mumbling something about being late."

Overall plot:

"Set in 1985, in the town of Hill Valley, California, the story follows Marty McFly, a teenager accidentally sent back to 1955 in a time-traveling DeLorean automobile built by his eccentric scientist friend Doctor Emmett "Doc" Brown. Trapped in the past, Marty inadvertently prevents his future parents' meeting—threatening his very existence—and is forced to reconcile the pair and somehow get back to the future."

So I don't think I need to explain why this is here given how much it has been shown and mentioned in season 3. But few things are interesting here, the fact that California is mentioned is a big deal for me again. I know you are aware of the set leaks just as I am aware, if we can trust them than this could be a hint of that location.

Next, we have the theme of Time. Now ever since ST4 was announced, clocks and times have been a key feature in the promotion. Who know what this might mean but again, we're not going to develop that in the post.

There is also the whole funny scenes of Robin realising that indeed Marty's mother had tried to "bang" her own son. Now given the nature of the shown, certain images in the show during certain events and certain stories, you know to what it connects and to which theories it connects. Won't develop further on it but it can be used as an element that can go into those theories.

The gnome is also found outside of Starcourt Mall where Robin and Steve talk about "Back to the Future". It is also where Billy has his "Back to te Future" moment with his car going extremely fast just like the DeLorean.

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Gnome #4: Indiana

"Master of Adventure."

Overall plot:

"After arriving in India, Indiana Jones is asked by desperate villagers to find a mystical stone and rescue their children from a Thuggee cult practicing child slavery, black magic, and ritualistic human sacrifice in honor of the goddess, Kali."

Fun fact, on Twitter for ST3 promo, a parody poster of this same movie has been posted here of the official ST account.

Jim is obviously Indiana Jones, the look speaks for itself and when he is in the Tunnels in season 2, there's a lot of Indiana Jones imagery.

And of course Kali as 008, a Hindu goddess but as we will see here, it parallels more the Mindflayer.

In 1935, Indiana Jones survives a murder attempt by Lao Che, a crime boss in Shanghai who has hired him to retrieve the remains of Emperor Nurhaci. With his young orphaned Chinese sidekick, Short Round, and the nightclub singer, Willie Scott, in tow, Indy flees Shanghai on a cargo aircraft. While the three of them are asleep, the pilots (employed by Lao Che) dump the fuel and escape via parachute, leaving the plane to crash over the Himalayas. The three narrowly manage to survive by jumping out of the plane on an inflatable raft.

(I wonder if this could be something we see in season 4 with Hopper where he tries to escape on a plane and ends up crashing somewhere or is betrayed by someone who he asked the help of. Now it's a trio and in season 3, Jim, Joyce, Alexei and Murray are the main group that fits this trio. Jim for all the fighting and crazy shit, Joyce and Alexei are kind of like Short Round, they are the sidekicks of Hopper. Murray the role of Willie Scott since she speaks Chinese and him Russian and that Jim just like Indy finds annoying sometimes. Alexei is also kind of like Willie since he kinda goes along with them.

But if we also look at season 2, El is alot like Short Round since she is kind of an orphan too and has a father figure later on. It could also be Will since Hopper is with him a lot of times through season 2. Also Willie did felt out of her element like Alexei because of course he is Russian. Willie in itself doesn't have a lot in common with Joyce but still it's another connection to Will since she has a name close to the one of her sons. Something that does fit a bit more is Jim and Hopper both escaping death, of course Hopper at the end of season 3 but also during season 3 at the farm where he's being shot at by Gregori and than the car doesn't work and explodes and they have to make their way through the forest.

Willie Scott could also be referenced when El disguise herself as this pretty blonde girl in season 1.

Now however, Scoop Troops does fit certain parts of these trio. All the fighting with Steve like Indiana Jones but Robin got his brain because she cracked the code. Dustin and Erica are kinda like short round (especially Dustin who has kind of the same hat as short round.) and are referenced with all the others as children by Robin. Steve doesn't feel in his element like Willie with the three of them who are nerds just like Erica who also doesn't want to accept it. And Robin just like Willie speaks some languages.)

They ride down the mountain slopes and fall into a raging river, eventually arriving at the village of Mayapore in northern India. The villagers plead for their aid in retrieving the sacred stone (shivalinga) stolen from their shrine, along with their missing children, by evil forces in the nearby Pankot Palace. Indy agrees to do so, hypothesizing that the stone is one of the five Sankara stones given by the gods to help humanity fight evil. (It's kinda like Alexei who turns his back on the Russians, for his life of course and agrees to help Hopper close the gate to save Hawkins and their kids before monsters start to appear or may attack one of their kids. Now the stone could be something similar to the promethium or the two keys who opens the gate and is a highly valuable ressource. It also may be the Flayed who are needed to create the monster for the Mindflayer.)

The trio receive a warm welcome at Pankot Palace and are allowed to stay for the night as guests, attending a lavish, but revolting, banquet hosted by the young Maharajah. The officials rebuff Indy's theory that the Thuggee cult is responsible for their troubles. Later that night, Indy is attacked by an assassin. After Indy kills him, he discovers a series of tunnels hidden behind a statue and sets out to explore them, overcoming a number of booby-traps.

(This could be like when Hopper, Joyce and Murray disguised themselves as Russian soldiers but was than discovered by Grigori who attacks them.

The tunnels could be both groups discovering that there is a secret russian base underground and a gate which explains why there are monsters again in Hawkins but it also be the Source, Brimborn Steel Works, where the Mindflayer is lurking underground where he has cult-like followers who makes sacrifices for him to grow bigger and bigger.

It's also like the Tunnels in season 2 who explains why the soil of Hawkins seemed to literally rot. )

The trio reach an underground temple where the Thuggees worship Kali with human sacrifice. They discover that the Thuggees now possess three of the Sankara stones and have enslaved the children to search for the last two, hidden in the palace catacombs. As Indy tries to retrieve the stones, he, Willie, and Shorty are captured. Thuggee high priest Mola Ram forces Indy to drink a potion that puts him into a trance-like state in which he mindlessly serves the cult. (It's very much like Robin and Steve who after discovering the gate are catched by the Russians and than drugged to answer their questions. But also like the Flayed who drinks the chemicals and serves the Mindflayer like a mindless cult.)

Willie is prepared for sacrifice, while Shorty is put to work in the mines with the other children. Shorty escapes and returns to the temple, where he first frees Indy and, later, the Maharajah from the effects of the potion. Indy saves Willie and retrieves the stones. After freeing the children, Indy fights a hulking overseer and leaves him to be killed by a rock crusher. (Basically Dustin saves Steve and Robin. Willie being prepared for sacrifice is kind of like El prepared for sacrifice by Billy in 3x08 but also frees Billy from the effects of the Mindflayer by making him remember his mother, a pretty blonde woman like Willie and sacrifices himself. And Hopper fights Gregori, a "hulking overseer" and kills him.)

The trio escape from the temple, pursued by Thuggees, and barely escape Mola Ram's attempt to flood them out. They are again ambushed by Mola Ram and his henchmen on a rope bridge above a crocodile-infested river. Indy cuts the bridge, causing several of the henchmen to fall to the crocodiles and leaving the survivors to hang on for their lives. As Mola Ram and Indy struggle, Indy invokes the name of Shiva, causing the stones to glow red-hot and burn through Indy's satchel. Two of them fall out; Mola Ram tries to catch the third, but burns his hand and falls from the bridge and into the river, where he, too, is eaten by the crocodiles. (This can be connected to all the kids fighting in Hawkins with the Spider Monster. But the bridge could also fit for the key in the secret base where Hopper and Gregori fights. The gruesome death of Mola Ram is similar to the gruesome death that Gregori has.)

Indy catches the stone safely and climbs up just as a company of British Indian Army riflemen, sent by the Maharajah, arrive and open fire against the Thuggees to drive them away; the surviving Thuggees are soon cornered and arrested by more soldiers. Indy, Willie, and Shorty return safely to Mayapore with the stone and the missing children. (While it may end well in the movie, we know Billy and multiple people die, the Thuggees unlike the Russians have been captured while the Russians where all able to flee before the US Army arrives and Hopper is presumed dead. Only the children in both stories are alive but are probably traumatized for life.)

All in all we can see that this movie might have had a big influence on the plot of season 3 through many characters and more. It may have some hints about possible events for Hopper in season 4 or even beyond but that's about it for. It's a nice package of comparaisons and references though.

The gnome is found in the Hawkins Community Pool where Billy is. The same Billy who obeys mindlessly the Mindflayer and sacrifices people to it. Just like the Thuggees with Kali.

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Gnome #5: Chunk

"Posed in some odd dance maneuver."

Overall plot:

"In the film, a band of kids who live in the "Goon Docks" neighborhood of Astoria, Oregon, attempt to save their homes from foreclosure and, in doing so, they discover an old treasure map that takes them on an adventure to unearth the long-lost fortune of One-Eyed Willy, a legendary 17th-century pirate. During the adventure, they are chased by a family of criminals who want the treasure for themselves."

So first, let's get this out of the way, Sean Astin who play Bob Newby, our beloved who plays a character named Mikey.

The Goonies is a 1985 American adventure comedy film co-produced and directed by Richard Donner from a screenplay by Chris Columbus, based on a story by executive producer Steven Spielberg. In the film, kids who live in the "Goon Docks" neighborhood of Astoria, Oregon, attempt to save their homes from foreclosure and, in doing so, they discover an old treasure map that takes them on an adventure to unearth the long-lost fortune of One-Eyed Willy, a legendary 17th-century pirate. During the adventure, they are chased by a family of criminals who want the treasure for themselves.

I wonder if this might hint at some Season 4 plot right here. The Hawkins gang faces the threat of Hawkins becoming a literal ghost down and might need to find something to save it. Also Willy like William, again Will is still there.

The Goonies include optimist lead Goonie Mikey Walsh, his older brother Brandon, the inventive Data, the talkative Mouth, and the overweight klutz Chunk.

Rummaging through the Walshes' attic, they come across a 1632 doubloon and an old treasure map purporting to lead to the treasure of legendary pirate "One-Eyed Willy", believed to be located somewhere nearby. Mikey considers One-Eyed Willy to be the original Goonie. (It kinda reminds me of Mike who got mad at Max in season 2 and told her they didn't need another party member. And he mentionned Will first right after him.)

The kids overpower and bind Brandon and make their way to an abandoned restaurant on the coast that coincides with the map; Brandon soon follows alongside Andy, a cheerleader with a crush on him ( there has been cheerleaders that have been reported in season 4 such as Chrissy.); and Stef, Andy's friend. The group quickly discovers the derelict restaurant is a hideout of the Fratelli crime family: Francis, Jake, and their mother. (Maybe it is both a reference to the Russians in season 3 who have a hideout under the mall who have many restaurants. Or the Lab who OBVIOUSLY does a lot of illegal activities. )

The Goonies find a tunnel in the basement and follow it (like the tunnels made by the Mindflayer in season 2), but when Chunk flags down a motorist to go to the sheriff’s station, he gets abducted by the assailants and imprisoned with their hulking, deformed, younger brother Sloth. (This is obviously like Dustin who befriends Dart in season 2, a literal Demogorgon in the making.)

The Fratellis interrogate Chunk until he reveals where the Goonies have gone, and begin pursuit. Chunk is left behind with Sloth, but befriends him. After Sloth frees both of them, Chunk calls the sheriff, and both follow the trail of the Fratellis. (This is very reminiscent of Hopper in season 1 who gets interrogated by Lab agents or Steve and Robin by the Russians.)

The Goonies evade several deadly booby traps along the tunnels, while staying ahead of the Fratellis. Finally, they reach the grotto where Willy's pirate ship, the Inferno, is anchored. (Will also has a ship, the rainbow ship he drew for Joyce, also Inferno literally means Hell just like what Hawkins has been called.)

The group discovers the ship is filled with treasure, and they start filling their pockets, but Mikey warns them not to take any on a set of scales in front of Willy, considering that to be their tribute to him. As they leave the ship, the assailants appear and strip them of their loot. They start to bind the Goonies and make them walk the plank, until Chunk arrives with Sloth and distracts the assailants long enough for the Goonies to jump overboard and swim to safety. (It's the opposite of the season 2 finale, where Dustin has to distract Dart so that the other could pass through the tunnels.)

The Fratellis proceed to grab all the treasure they can, including those on Willy's scales; this triggers another booby trap that causes the grotto to cave in. With Sloth's help, the Goonies and Fratellis barely escape.

The two groups emerge on Astoria's beach, where they reunite with the Goonies' families and the police. The Fratellis are arrested, but Chunk prevents Sloth from also being taken; he invites Sloth to live with him, which Sloth accepts. ("Unfortunately", Dart compared to Sloth probably died.)

As the kids describe their adventure to their parents, the Walshes' housekeeper, Rosalita, discovers that Mikey's marble bag is filled with gems he took from the ship and had not been seized by the Fratellis. Mikey's father triumphantly rips up the foreclosure papers, declaring they have enough money to negate the foreclosure. As the Goonies celebrate, they see the Inferno, having broken free of the grotto, sailing off on its own in the distance. (Could it be hinting at a possible happy ending for Stranger Things ?)

So Fratellis, is similar to fratello which means "brother, fellow, neighbor" which perhaps could be a reference to the Mindflayer who is kind of our neighbor since he is basically in the same places but in the Upside Down. The Mindflayer also has been paralleled to Billy and other abusive father figures. Billy who is the brother of Max. He has also been paralleled to Kali through his anger and him attacking people who hurted him or might hurt him. Could in itself The Mindflayer should be taken or seen as some sort of family figure ? Maybe him being always associated with Will The Wise especially in 2x04 or someone who has the name Will like Billy is a connection. The same Billy who also parallels Russians who just like the Fratellis have secret hideouts.

Though the Fratellis are more motivated by greed which fits Brenner, Lonnie (who tried to use his son's death to gain money.) or Russians most.

Now Willy, Willy is a captain. Maybe it could be hinting at the fact that Will has more importance to the story than we think. There's also Inferno, "Hell" which is Hawkins but also the name of the ship. And Will has a rainbow ship... Could Hawkins be the ship of Will where his adventures are taking place ?

As for the dance... well as you've seen upper in the post: it's the "Truffle Shuffle Dance". It's something that Chunk has to do before entering Mikey's house. It's similar to what Dustin do at the beginning of season 1 to the bullies when he makes his bones crack due to his medical condition, cleidocranial dysplasia.

As for where this gnome is located, it's in Weathertop where Cerebro is located which is fitting since Dustin has a lot of Goonies as inspiration for his character.

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Gnome #6: Elvis

"He's not dead!"

"Elvis Aaron Presley (January 8, 1935 – August 16, 1977), also known simply as Elvis, was an American singer and actor. Dubbed the "King of Rock and Roll", he is regarded as one of the most significant cultural icons of the 20th century. His energized interpretations of songs and sexually provocative performance style, combined with a singularly potent mix of influences across color lines during a transformative era in race relations, led him to both great success and initial controversy." - Wikipedia.

It is a lot known that people in the 80's thought that Elvis Presley was still alive due to his status and the aura he had as a celebrity. However, no matter how appealing this myth may be, he died of an excessive usage of prescription drugs which reminds me of Nancy who said she thought Tom was on drugs when he fired her and Jonathan while he an the Flayed were drinking chemicals. He also died in 1977, the same year "Heroes" by David Bowie came out which is a song that was used two times when we thought a character died when he was actually alive which are Will and Hopper. Will and Hopper both have a lot of rock in their Spotify playlist.

Also, I personally think that Steve has kind of an Elvis Presley aura to him especially in season 1. After all, Steve has a nickname "King Steve" and Elvis Presley is often nicknamed "The King" and both were popular with girls.

Fun fact: Dacre Montgomery who plays Billy who literally becomes the new "King" of Hawkins will play in the biographical music drama "Elvis" about Elvis Presley where he will play a character called "Steve Binder".

Also actor David Harbour also got married with singer Lily Allen by Elvis in Las Vegas.

It's also found hidden behind bushes near the Public Library. Maybe indicating that Elvis is still out there in the world and hiding.

Which also may be a reference to Brenner who has a similar haircut but also about the novel "Suspicious Minds", a prequel of ST taking place in the Lab when Brenner was doing his sinister experiments which is the same title as one of the songs of Elvis. Like Elvis, Brenner is still out there, hiding in Hawkins.

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Gnome #7: Jack

"All work and no play makes Jack a dull gnome."

Again another reference to Shining. So what you are seeing here is a proverb, it means: "It means that without time off from work, a person becomes both bored and boring."

In Shining, it represents Jack's slow descent into madness. But it could be a reference to Joyce, Jonathan and Nancy who all work their asses off and don't take a lot of time for themselves and so don't have the time to explore anything else than work which also cause for them not to be there when Will got kidnapped. It may also represent Jonathan's words to Nancy in season 1 where he "called out" the boring life she will have and that she will live like her parents so in this case the proverb becomes about societal norms.

Mike just like Jack is an aspiring writer, Mike just like other members of his family falls into these societal norms that are expected like work and overworking in this instance which makes them boring in the eyes of people like Jonathan. "No play" may also reference D&D which Mike started to ignore in season 3 and worried more pointless and superficial things.

Again, hope it doesn't foreshadow anything for these two characters.

This gnome is found in the Library which is fitting considering Jack wants to be a writer.

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Gnome #8: Flynn (Flynn Rider from "Tangled" (2010))

"Looks like he rides well."

Overall plot of Tangled (2010):

"The film tells the story of Rapunzel, a lost, young princess with magical long blonde hair who yearns to leave her secluded tower. Against her abusive foster mother's wishes who kidnappee her when she was young, she accepts the aid of an intruder to take her out into the world which she has never seen."

This story is literally what the boys was arguing about at the end of season 1.

1)The lost knight...

Flynn Rider is actually the son of a king and queen that were from a kingdom that got destroyed by a powerful opal. He was evacuated and placed in an orphanage. He made his reputation as thief.

So Mike and El both parallels this guy, well Mike is a palladin in D&D and he is the son of a wealthy family so he is basically a night. El however also lost her parents like him and has more attributes of a knight in season 1 than Mike.

Flynn is arrogant, which Mike can be a bit sometimes but the both of them can be extremely courageous and care a lot about the people they care about though they are not very strong, nor athletic. Maybe Flynn a bit more.

Also fun coincidence Flynn = Finn, the name of the actor who plays Mike. (almost the same name).

Both him and El run into each other in the woods. Just like Flynn who discover Rapunzel while trying to enter Rapunzel's tower but is knocked out by her who is none other than the...

2)The proud princess...

Well first Rapunzel = Eleven. Both of these girls have magical powers and are used by an abusive and evil parental figure who needs them for their own interest, Mother Gothel used the powers of Rapunzel to stay young forever (like an addiction, a drug) and Martin Brenner aka "Papa". They are both locked away somewhere. El in the lab and Rapunzel in the tower which they both seeked to escape out of. Both believed that these parental figures loved them while it was not true. El also has long blond hair in season 1 like Rapunzel. And both quickly form a relationship with a boy they just met. Both don't know who their real parents are and wants to find them. While Rapunzel has long blonde hair, El had a shaved head.

Also in season 2, El is locked in a cabin in the woods because of Hopper because he believe it is not safe out there which is exactly what Mother Gothel tells Rapunzel. Just like her El disobeys and seeks to discover who her true parents are.

Rapunzel seeks to know what are those floating lights that always appear on her birthday, it is actually her parents who are the king and queen of a kingdom not so far away that do that every year hoping one day she will come back to her. She is a "lost princess". It is very similar to Terry Ives who was communicating through the lights to El.

Rapunzel's power comes out of something that is also connected to something famous in ST.

3) Weird flowers in the cave...

Rapunzel's power come from a flower called "Sundrop flower". = Sunflower which is said by Terry Ives.

This flower can pretty much heal anything including mortal wounds. The Queen got pregnant with Rapunzel but was also terribly sick so she took this flower to heal herself and while doing so, Rapunzel got this ability.

This is very reminiscent of Terry Ives who was pregnant with El and took part in the MKUltra experiences that gave her these powers including certain drugs. She is also "ill" in a way as she is now stuck in a loop. At least from what we saw.

But Rapunzel also parallels another character.

Will Byers. Will could communicate through lights to his mother, just like the parents of Rapunzel and Terry Ives.

The weird flowers could be referencing the sort of vines that entered inside of him in the Upside Down which gave him his "now-memories".

Both had abusive parental figure that would lock them somewhere for whatever reason. (Lonnie with Will in his trunk.)

(Also Hopper may have tried to separate Mike and El but he wasn't like what a Lonnie or Brenner would have been. This is why yes, the situation in season 2 parallels but Hopper truly wished good for El while Brenner and Mother Gothel didn't care for any of these two.)

Same is for Lonnie, he doesn't care about Will.

Since Will is a cleric, both him and Rapunzel have the same time of power. Powers that El doesn't have:

To heal the sick and injured

To revive the dead

To work as a shield

Given this story, it may hint at the fact that Brenner and Lonnie may try to take El and Will for their own greed and purposes.

Since Rapunzel parallels both Will and El, you know what that means for Flynn who parallels Mike.

Flynn in the movie is stabbed by Mother Gothel and dies before cutting the hair of Rapunzel killing Mother Gothel in the process. Rapunzel mourns him and one of his tears heal him.

If Flynn parallels Mike, than something bad could happen to him. If Will does have powers and has feelings for Mike, a supposed death may reveal his powers.

And if he has the same powers as his cleric role, than he could heal those who get hurt or even bring the dead back to life.

If Lonnie sees Mike around Will, given he is homophobic. He may try to hurt him so that he doesn't go near Will again which could lead to him being in grave danger.

Of course all of that is just speculation.

This gnome was found on the parking lot of Starcourt where El decided to break up with Mike and we saw Will smiling in the background.

Also I don't know but... "Looks like he rides well", I mean there's certain undertones to that which are... I don't know how to process that but from what you've just read, Mike apparently rides well. I mean I have nothing against gay sex jokes but still...

Even if it's unintentional, it's how it'll sound on the internet.

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Gnome #9: David

"At 399, he's the oldest gnome around."

So this gnome was already in the first ST official mobile game. And this reminds me a lot of The Lord Of The Rings and The Hobbit but also and of course; Dungeons & Dragons.

The World of David the Gnome, originally titled David, el Gnomo (also known as David, the Gnome), is a Spanish animated television series based on the children's book The Secret Book of Gnomes, by the Dutch author Wil Huygen and illustrator Rien Poortvliet. The series was originally created in Spain by BRB Internacional (who were also responsible for the Dogtanian and the Three Muskehounds franchise (Like Dart in season 2 and Mike, Lucas and Dustin where very much like the Three Musketeers in season 1.) and other cartoons such as Bobobobs and Around the World with Willy Fog)

The series presents the gnomes as a kind species, of 15 centimetres (6 inches) of height, and between 250 and 300 grams (8 and 10 ounces) of weight depending on gnome body mass. According to their habitat, different types of gnomes are distinguished: the ones of the forest, the ones of the garden, the ones of the farm, the ones of the house, the ones of the dunes, those of Siberia (David = David Harbour = Hopper = Hopper is in Russia), and nomadic "gypsy" gnomes (commonly looked down upon by other gnomes). A gnome's lifespan is usually 400 years, though there is one example of a couple in the Balkans living 550 years.

Gnomes such as the main characters live in pairs in comfortable caves or holes under trees [kinda like Hobbits] (in their case in the company of a pair of mice and a cricket). Their diet is mostly vegetarian. They are helped by the animals of the forest (kinda like Radagast who is the password to Castle Byers who is located in the woods) when travelling long distances or when they need to arrive quickly at a specific location. Gnomes work in various ways to repair the damage inevitably caused by humans. They also have the power of telepathy and mind control. (kinda like El or the Mindflayer, or even Galadriel in The Lord Of The Rings.)

Their main enemies are the trolls, malevolent and clumsy creatures who always make trouble for the other inhabitants of the forest, as well as gnome poachers. They have supernatural powers that are really strong but they have a weakness, if the sunlight gets on them, they turn to stone.(could be referencing all the Upside Down creatures who don't like sunlight and everything hot.) [Also very much like the Hobbit.] Also one of the trolls was voiced by someone who had the name Henderson, like Dustin Henderson. I also think it references a comic where some bullies attack Will and Mike calls them trolls.

Here are the most important characters:

David is a gnome of the forest. David is 399 years old, making him the oldest gnome around (since gnomes live no more than 400 years exactly, except Franklin, the gnome from the west, who lived 550 years), although he possesses exceptional constitution. David is a doctor, and he uses his knowledge of many fields, such as hypnosis and acupuncture, to heal his patients, usually animals, such as his faithful friend Swift the fox, or other gnomes. David also befriends a bird that, when he whistles, immediately arrives to quickly transport him to wherever necessary. For longer trips, he sometimes travels in a basket attached to the neck of the bird. (It may be a reference to clerics who are known to heal their allies and travelling with birds reminds me of Gandald who sometimes has the help of Eagles in some stories.)

Paul is David's twin brother. Not only does Paul have a normal moustache in contrast to David's handlebar moustache but his jumper is a darker shade of blue, he has a bigger nose, his gnome hat is dark blue whereas David's is red, and his trousers and boots are an inverse of David's: David's trousers are brown and his boots are beige, while Paul wears beige trousers and dark boots. (Of course this is a reference to Will and El who have been compared a lot of times throughout the show and who a lot of people in the fandom consider them siblings and twins, Will has a lot of Red in his wardrobe while El has a lot of blue.)

This gnome was found in a secret Russian base underground in Weathertop where Dustin discovers the Russian transmission coming from their main base located under the mall like a cave (like where gnome lives.). There are also gnomes in Siberia and having the name David, the name of Hopper's actor creates a connection since right now Hopper is in Russia. It may also be a nod to the group of kids who are all little gnomes running around the forest with their magical powers.

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Gnome #10: Baskin

"Robin's favorite gnome."

Now this is a funny one.

This is a reference to the famous Baskin-Robbins which is a chain of ice cream restaurants that did special ice creams for Season 3 because of Scoops Ahoy. It is Robin's favorite gnome because they literally share the same name.

Baskin could also be a reference to the film of the same name where Five police officers, Remzi, Arda, Yavuz, Apo, and Seyfi, are dining at a restaurant, during which they have a discussion. Their meal is interrupted when they receive a distress call from Inceagac, a town known for being the focus of strange rumors. During the trip Seyfi has a terrifying vision of a bloody figure and accidentally drives their van into the water. Stranded, the officers eventually make their way to Inceagac, where they find themselves in an abandoned building (back in the Ottoman days, this used to be a police station), captured by cult members and are subjected to a number of increasingly bizarre and surreal scenarios. In the end, they realize they have all inadvertently wandered into Hell.

It has alot of similiraties with stories like Silent Hills or Hellraiser, two stories that inspired Stranger Things especially Hellraiser for Stranger Things 4. And it fully embraces the satanic imagery and themes which is something we are going to see with the satanic panic and also has the theme of time, dreams and visions.

We'll see how much season 4 decides to use those sort of elements in the show.

Well this gnome is easy to find. It's in the Scoops Ahoy parlor next to Robin. USS Butterscotch seems to be very popular there

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Gnomes 11 - 20 coming soon.

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chris-spacehere · 3 years

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WAKE UP GIRL, QUACKITY FINALLY DROPPED LORE

AND IT WAS A W E S O M E.

So as your local quackity fan i’ll spill all the tea of why i loved this. (btw this all /rp)

- THE INTRO:

First, the countdown instead of the club pinguin ‘starting soon’ image was obviously for thrill emotions, but it stroke fear, the countdown felt like you were watching the final countdown till the end of the world, the music in the background? CHEF KISS, it felt so calm yet so alarming and it gave the hype to what was bound to happen.

- LAS NEVADAS.

We still don’t have a look at the nevadas but here, look at bbh and quackity conversation. It lets us know while quackity ain’t doin business, he has been messing with the eggpire, he did get in their ways, and it’s awesome to be able to infer it just by words, I JUST LOVE IT when we don’t see an action but we see someone mention it and that let’s us infer stuff or sometimes discover something at the same time than the characters.

Bbh actuation was so good, you could see he was doing a voice, an accent, he was doing it with passion too, and all this makes me more excited for the red banquet (aka: manberg festival 3: stranger things kinnies)

- G L A T T

The bit with schlatt was awesome and i think this is the first time quackity sees glatt, i also saw a big ass character growth in quackity. in first season, he responded to ‘flatty patty’ by sending a bad edited meme on twitter, season 3 and he just responds with a threatening face, yelling and standing up for himself. CHARACTER GROWTH BABY.

- businnes with sam

This part man, THIS PART

The actuation was sooo good, Sam popped off here, big q popped off the whole stream, and like, when he kept bringing up how sam let tommy die, bringing up the security issue, and MAN, when sam said ‘i did my job, my job is keep dream in there, not keep the visitors alive’ IT WAS AWESOME BECAUSE YOU COULD SEE HE WAS SAYING THAT IN A WAY HE IS STILL GULTY ABOUT TOMMY’S DEATH BUT HE WANTS TO DENY IT.

- Did he win the bet?

He probably lost the bet, as soon as they make the bet, we cut to big q asking for the book, which was the prize is schlatt won and again THEY LEAVE US TO INFERENCE WHAT HAPPENED AND I LOVE IT. He seems too dedicated to getting the knowledge of the book but on the other hand, he wants dream to suffer (which is valid as fuck, dream deserves P A I N) for all he has done, he was actually the first one to realize dream was the roots of all problems! he knew this since before season 2 finale, he is a smart-ass and you will all respect him.

Plus imagine the aftermath of he getting the book, he would become one of the most powerful people actually, (next to foolish who could just grab his children and revive people but he is too busy finding the hole on the roof) the bets dude THE BETS. ‘if you win, i bring him back, if you loose, you give me all your stuff, deal?’ IMAGINE THAT, PHIL WOULD JUST FUCKING GO BROKE TRYING TO REVIVE WIL.

- Final act.

He is shown coming back, out of prision and looking at the el rapids sign, plus i love the way he edited all those flashbacks to happier days and then cut to showing us his skin, filled with blood AND AGAIN, THE INFERENCING GAME FUCK YEAAAAAH I LOVE WHEN HE DOES THAT. and the way he cuts off his friends faces first and then the fiances, only leaving him, as he destroys el rapids? CHILLS, LITERAL CHILLS, the old quackity is gone, he has finally been blinded by power and rage, he has finally gone mad and then he goes back and RIPS OFF HIMSELF to proof the old quackity is finally gone and holly shiit the next part, WHEN HE GRABS IT LIKE A PAPER AND RIPS IT OFF, then the calendar, THAT SHIT SCARED ME ‘visit dream, visit dream, visit dream’ it was just visit dream and torture him AND HE BETTER DO THAT BECAUSE THAT GREEN BITCH DESERVES FATE WORSE THAN DEATH. and then he puts the tiny shit of billars or however they are named, THIS FEELS LIKE A MARVEL MOVIE POST-CREDIT SCENE, IT WAS SO GREATLY DONE AND I LOVED IT TO THE FUCKING TOP.

- Aftermath

There will obviously be an aftermath to his actions as with events like the red banquet, and the inevitable return of wilbur and escape from dream, like that mf gonna snap quackity as soon as he sees him, plus i’ve seen awesome theories relating quackity with the in-between, there will obviously be a connection with the fiances and karl and all the time travel stuff sometime, the casino, glatt etc. this man will get fucked sometime.

Also quick note: techno and dream are the most powerful people of the server and the only times they have been in genuine fer was because of this man, so yall better take him seriously because he has made gods plead for mercy. (not foolish tho, again, my man is busy finding the hole on the roof, he has got no time to do godly stuff)

uHHhH thx for reading, reblogs r apreciated, just sayiiin.

#dream smp #dsmp #dreamsmp #quackity #mcyt #big q #dream smp quackity #dsmp quackity #pog trough the pain #just killed an old man with heart problems

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bumblebzz-911 · 3 years

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[Warning: Very Long. Really Long.] Purely self-indulgent Blitz/Jäger thoughts and excessive HCs that I have kept hidden and now gained the courage to post here (I also didn’t want to do homework and wanted to do this instead, but that’s besides the point).

>> First Meeting:

- Mm. I think Jäger would lowkey be intimidated by Blitz, since that man seems to be a social butterfly who radiates warmth and everyone just naturally gravitates towards his energy. Jäger, on the other hand, is very eager to connect with everyone and honestly seems like the person who always starts the conversation. And maybe he’s used to that. (I wanted to add more but it’s the first paragraph and it’s oh, so lengthy.)

So with this in mind, when they first meet, Blitz is actually the one who greets him first and it surprises Jäger. Since it’s very unexpected!

- Blitz is very intrigued (and taken aback) by Jäger’s spontaneous bursts of interests and anything he’s knowledgeable about. During this time (+ more convos later), Blitz learns that if you turn his dials right, Jäger actually becomes a talking radio. (Note: He also learns that for the best results, he should tune into the topic of prototypes, airplane models, and maybe Minecraft mods.)

-To tack more onto that ^^^, I also think that this is kind of Jäger’s way of trying to impress Blitz? I’m laughing so hard— I can see him talking about a documentary to Blitz, who is trying his best to understand but nods like everything is fine. And it is, because if it’s a topic that Jäger goes off about for days he’ll definitely do his research about it. Simply because he wants to impress Jäger as well by being able to add his 2 cents in and maybe see Jäger literally light up whenever he does. <3

TL;DR they talk a lot and fall in love

>> Dating/Romantic Stuff:

- Elias is the first to figure out that he’s caught feelings for the engineer. But he’s afraid of rejection, so he keeps it to himself. Jäger is actually the one who confesses by accident, it happens during one of their convos when he says “I love you” out of excitement. A little bit of panic ensues when he realizes what he’s said, but they come clean and admit their feelings for one another.

- They don’t announce it out loud because they kind of don’t want to be bombarded by questions. But they don’t hide the fact that they’re dating either.

- Even though they’re my OTP, I perceive them as a side-pairing in a fic— They kind of just emit those vibes.

- No one notices that they’re dating. No one. Kind of like they’re part of the background and it feels natural. They’re holding hands? Cool. They’re making out on the couch? Also very cool.

- During a celebration, they’re found out by Twitch when she finds them holding hands and teases them if they’re dating. Jäger nonchalantly says that they have been for 3 months now.

(Extra: Blitz and Jäger make a run for the fire exit when everyone starts asking them the 5 Ws)

---

- Blitz can be a complete goofball when the occasion arises. He cracks (cringey) dad jokes that’ll earn him a slight elbowing from Jäger. He’s also exceptionally witty when it comes to making puns, but he mostly makes them in German because Jäger(though he tries to fight it) literally gets weak from them since they’re that good. Plus, when it’s just the both of them, these things become one of their inside jokes. (My 2 cents: I like this HC a lot because I feel like Jäger would not only laugh at the joke, but takes it apart in understanding and explains it back to Blitz. Like Jager just enjoys a good joke and repeats it back out of sheer appreciation. Blitz probably finds this part of him precious.)

-^^^ Blitz is also cheesy as heck. He’s a connoisseur of rom-coms, so when it’s his turn to take over and pops Two Weeks Notice into the DVD player, Jäger knows Blitz is going to recite some lines to him from memory.

- They kiss a lot (like a lot a lot) when they have the chance to. Blitz gets forehead kisses when waking up in the morning, Jäger gets those too before Blitz leaves for training. I think they both shower each other in kisses and Jäger peppers his more against Blitz’s jawline. Just ‘cause. 💫

And Blitz, being the cheesiest mf he is, loves to lower and dip Jäger when kissing him. Jäger tells him he hates it, but his smile betrays him. 💕

TL;DR They exude side-pair vibes and they are fluff in its purest form.

Note: I’m this 👌 close to falling asleep so this is probably.. pt. 1

#blitz/jäger #headcanons #passing out bc im so sleepy #but I just want to say that they’re cute for the millionth time #and im going to go sit in my corner and cry and then sleep

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caffiine · 3 years

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A BRIEF PAUSE

From my regularly scheduled content. I’ve got some shit to say, y’all (forewarning for spicy language and spoilers)

I thought about making this post on my fandom subblog but this show and this relationship have been TOO important to me for the past 8 years to not give it its proper place in my life. strap in bc im not sure how long this mf is about to be.

When i started this DUMB show at age 19 tortured soul “empath” dark academia me thought sam winchester was going to be my favourite character. and don’t @ me, i love sam now in his own right (and we deserve some SAILEEN PEOPLE). but after literally less than 5 episodes i KNEW dean’s character and his arc were going to be amazing and beautiful and he immediately became my favourite brother. The nuances of his character i.e. his shell vs his true self were so evident to me even in the first couple seasons. in my humble opinion, he had the most growth of the two brothers.

They all deserve to be happy, but for whatever FUCKING reason dean has the HARDEST TIME OF ANYONE being happy in this show. I know it’s his character. I know it was written that way. But FFS. I kept wondering when they were going to wrap up his emotional arc and stop torturing the poor dude.

then in season 4 they introduced castiel and 1) I thought the new concept of angels as assholes was super cool and 2) I hardcore SIMPED over misha collins (still do). I watched benignly as cas and dean began to form this relationship that seemed pretty special. I started watching the show when it was in its eighth season and I binged the shit out of it for two weeks until I was caught up. By the time I was caught up I was CERTAIN there were some feelings between them and I LOVED it. I am bisexual and I was ECSTATIC for a potential queer relationship between two masculine-portrayed dudes. I went on tumblr to express my newfound theory, only to find out that this was a real THING. “Destiel” was already an idea that had absolutely and intensely BLOSSOMED in the fandom for several seasons already. So many others saw what I saw and saw the potential of emotionally tortured/constipated “daddy’s blunt instrument” dean and the unfeeling daddy’s boy cas “crack in his chassis” Winchester being allowed to be happy together. I felt validated and hopeful. For a while.

Then it was season after season of hopefulness for them to be finally happy with each other while still fighting the ills of their world with sam and the other new members of their family that were added along the way, only to constantly have that hope seemingly teased away at the end every single time. By season 11 and the introduction of amara (not bashing, eventually loved her character and her development too) I gave up. I lost hope. I stopped watching the show. I didn’t want to keep watching my two favourite characters continuously abused by the story they were thrown into.

I know not everyone likes destiel, not everyone thought it was real. That’s chill, idc. Stories are so often meant to be (and sometimes inadvertently) left up to interpretation by the person experiencing and consuming them. It’s what’s so amazing about books and shows and movies that are able to make us feel so intensely about them and their characters. And I felt SO strongly about dean and cas. It was honestly really upsetting to me, the way the show was going with their relationship.

A while later season 13 had been going on and I started seeing some things pop up on my dash. Hopeful things. I did a bit of research and accidentally saw THE SCENE from season 12 and I couldn’t help myself. I restarted it. I watched the whole thing from the beginning again AND introduced it to my boyfriend I think partially as a way to ensure I wasn’t imagining shit (it took him awhile and a lot of me internally screaming during many scenes but by season 9 he was like “uh are they in gay love”). Fast forward to me finally catching up as season 14 was starting. I was still hopeful, somehow. And it happened AGAIN. Season 14 and the beginnings of 15 made me so sad. I HATED what they did with their relationship. I HATED the way it ended. I HATED the way dean treated cas and everyone around him. It felt like the show was taking his whole character arc back to day 1. I didn’t understand. I kept watching for a couple episodes after the big argument and cas left but the luster was gone and eventually I just stopped.

I love this show. It has meant so much to me as a story. So many of the characters are/were very dear to me. I know it’s a running joke with this show about character deaths and homophobia but the strength of the bond I felt was between cas and dean gave me a lot of hope. But it wasn’t enough. I felt betrayed one too many times. And for those of you who kept watching, for whatever reason, I don’t hold it against you. It’s still a beautiful and interesting story without cas and dean’s relationship. But I just personally couldn’t do it anymore.

I hadn’t planned on watching the rest of season 15 when it came back after pandemic hiatus, at least not for awhile. So imagine my FUCKING surprise when I was doom scrolling through twitter during election week on Thursday and I see supernatural trending right along with election shit.

What.

I couldn’t stop myself, I looked and literally SCREAMED and made my boyfriend spill his wine all over our couch. I didn’t know exactly what happened as I hadn’t seen the episode but APPARENTLY all my emotions and feelings had been at least partially vindicated. So I BOUGHT season 15 so I could finish watching where I had left off. I watched 8 episodes in less than 24hrs (don’t judge me there’s a quarantine) and I LIKED them. And it might’ve been bc I knew what was about to happen in 15 x18 but I really felt like the show was getting STRONGER as it neared its finish.

I was so excited for 15x19. I read so many posts from fellow fans, destiel and antis alike. There really weren’t a lot of bad emotions running around. Everyone seemed hopeful and excited like me.

I probably don’t need to go over 15x19 emotions but im going to anyway. I was disappointed. I was confused. I was angry. we are in season 15. The last season ever for this show that has had a HUGE following of fans who have loved it, sometimes unconditionally, sometimes even though it wasn’t the best (and sometimes less than good). A season and show that had just announced YES. CAS LOVES DEAN. ITS REAL. And I shouldn’t have to go over the nuances of why we would expect more after this, with two episodes to go before the show is done forever.

But I will bc im mad af.

Like I said in the beginning. Dean’s character arc has been incredible. His emotional growth – as subtle as it might’ve seemed – has been amazing. And dean has always been an emotional, loving person. he just felt like he wasn’t because the world made him feel that way. And that’s sad, y’all. Dean deserves to realize he DESERVES happiness. And in 15x18, we were finally heading basically directly there. With destiel, yes, but even if you’re anti, what cas said to dean about who he is and why he loves him obviously struck a fucking chord with dean. It obviously changed the way he viewed himself (RE: “that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are”).

But for WHATEVER reason that’s ALL we got in 15x19. One fucking SENTENCE about dean realizing maybe he’s not just built to kill people. And then jack leaves without a single mention of Eileen or cas or Charlie or literally anyone they ever cared about and dean rode off into the sunset alone with his brother while we watched a fucking FIVE MINUTE MONTAGE that made me want to hurl my own body into the sun they were driving toward. And cas is STILL DEAD.

BUT THERE’S STILL ONE EPISODE LEFT AND FUCK ME IF I HAVENT BEEN PAINTING ON MY CLOWN MAKEUP ALL WEEK. SO WHAT DO I WANT????

ONE: DEAN DESERVES HAPPINESS. REAL HAPPINESS. What the FUCK supernatural??? Wasn’t this the whole point of his arc??? And don’t get me wrong I REALLY want that happiness to come from Cas and a real spoken relationship of some sort between them bc it also ties in with my second point but tbh just PLEASE let dean be happy. Dean is a loving person and does everything for love as we JUST FOUND OUT. Dean would NOT be happy with everyone he’s ever loved gone for the rest of his life. I just don’t believe that’s fucking true. h elp him pls.

TWO: CAS DESERVES HAPPINESS. I know we got this whole speech about “happiness isn’t in the having it’s simply in being” but like. Really. Castiel was supposed to be a throwaway character no one was supposed to care about. But we all cared SO MUCH that he lasted 11 SEASONS longer than intended and became a main character and an integral part of the story. Cas has arguably sacrificed more than anyone on this show. His last act was to sacrifice his life to save the man he loved. He knew where he was going. He knew he was finally going to be able to tell dean he loved him and then immediately be taken by the empty where we know now thanks to season 15 that everyone in there just gets to dream forever about their regrets and sadness. HOW IS THAT FAIR. HOW IS THAT A GOOD ENDING FOR CAS. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE – CHARACTERS AND FANS ALIKE –TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Its messed up, supernatural. Y’all KNOW it is and I hope to HIGH HEAVENS this is going to be corrected in 15x20.

THREE: give sam Eileen back.

Well that’s all I’ve got in me, folks. I’m absolutely and intensely dreading Thursday. Im scared and nervous and obviously still angry that this is absolutely going to be the opposite of what they promised – another “game of thrones” ending. Some of y’all are giving me hope with your posts about maybe they’re trying to keep the ending a surprise and maybe cas is coming back and how can they not and why else would they have done the second to last episode like that and I hope yall are right.

Either way, im glad I am not alone with my feelings. Thanks yall for the experience of this fandom and show. Let’s stick together on Thursday, no matter our differences.

PS stop calling jensen ackles a homophobe or ill hex you.

#supernatural #destiel #deancas #oh and #saileen #just to make sure theyre not forgotten #dean winchester #castiel #Misha Collins #jensen ackles #15x18 #15x20 #15x19 #i fucking guess #dean x castiel #casdean #castiel x dean #supernatural season 15

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lununnunna · 4 years

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Waterworks || Dabi x Reader

angst in which you dont realize dabi physically cannot cry bc his mf tearducts out here like *burnt*

(again idk how 2 shorten my posts :( so apologies in advance) ((also couldnt stop thinking abt how dabi fr out here like ugly crying wo the tears i had an itch to write the angst))

part two

most times it made you lovingly roll your eyes. other times it made you laugh. but lately, dabis nonchalant and rather apathetic demeanor was weighing on you.

youve yet to see him cry, even when you two have your arguments and little bicker-fests, as any normal couple has. hes never cried, only yelled, or flashed bitter smiles and dark laughs. it unsettled you. hes never once shed a single tear, not even for your sake.

you began to question if he really loved you as much as you did, him.

surely if he loved you, he would cry in relief for your safety, or in sympathy for something that upset you, right?

you ultimately supposed he wouldnt really be one to cry to begin with, but what of that time you were followed home and nearly kidnapped? assaulted? he had merely burned them to ash for you, and carried you inside as you sobbed into his shoulder. he hadnt even done so much as comment; no whispers of relief, no ‘i love you’s, nothing to show you he was glad you were okay save for the kisses to your head and rubs on your back until you fell asleep. at the time, you felt he was focused on consoling you, and assumed he just didnt want you to know he was worried.

but now, you wondered if he even really cared.

a part of you told you you were being ridiculous, that he had to care if he was still with you, to bother saving you to begin with— but the hurt in your heart and concern in your head spoke louder, and drowned out any reason.

and so, here you found yourself, anxiety bubbling in the pit of your stomach and rising like bile into your throat. you had confronted him on the matter, only to be brushed off, irritating you until it had led to another petty argument.

you swallowed.

you wanted the truth, and you wanted it bad. you desperately needed to know what you truly meant to him. surely, if he cared, this would stir him, right? this would have to invoke some sort of feeling in him, right?

tears stinging your eyes, throat tightening and suddenly feeling dryer than the sahara desert, you spoke, voice trembling.

“i.. im leaving.”

he fixed you with his sharp, icy gaze.

“what?” he gritted out through clenched teeth.

“i said im leaving. we’re— we’re over. we should break up.”

you watched his reaction carefully, watching the way the muscles in his jaw flexed and tightened, before relaxing and a low chuckle escaped from the back of his throat. he ran a hand through his hair, scoffing.

he glanced over to you once more.

“you dont mean that, doll. look, lets just put this behind us. you know i love you, so give it a rest, yeah? lets just watch a movie.”

you could hear the irritation threatening to leak into his voice. your brows furrowed into a frown.

“do i? do i know you love me? because from where im standing, im not feeling it. i meant what i said. i think itd be for the best if we at least took a break.”

he was silent after that. you could see the anger brewing behind those oceanic eyes you fell in love with, staring at you, trying to read you, as if he thought if he stared long enough, hed be able to see and understand what you were thinking; feeling, and why.

you trembled. you wouldnt be able to hold back the tears much longer.

you took a deep, shaky breath.

“goodbye, dabi.”

he didnt say anything. he didnt say anything as you walked away, slipping on your shoes at the door. he only watched, frozen in place, mind racing with a million thoughts at once. dont forget your coat, he wanted to say. its cold out. its dark. stay safe, baby. call me the moment you feel scared or threatened.

but his body wouldnt respond. he felt numb, watching your retreating figure slip behind the door, the soft click of the doorknob suddenly sounding so much louder in his head.

he was trembling violently, anger and despair crashing over him in suffocating waves.

everything felt so fucking surreal. he felt like it was a dream, it wasnt real, you were only kidding, you were only testing him, you didnt mean it, youd be back tomorrow, kissing him and hugging him and gracing him with your sweet voice talking about anything and everything and nothing in particular.

but he knew.

he knew it wasnt a joke. it was real. you were gone, and he didnt stop you.

and that pissed him off to all fucking hell.

he snapped, letting out a scream of rage, bellowing into the empty apartment, knees buckling under the weight of his broken heart. fists and fire met anything he could come into contact to, wrecking the living room as his screams and shouts tore through his throat, desperate to be heard.

he wanted to cry. he wanted to cry, to chase after you, to wrap you in his arms and kiss you like there would be no tomorrow. he hated himself.

he fucking hated himself.

he wanted to burn the entire building down in his rage and sorrow, to burn the entire world so youd have no choice but to run to him. but he knew that was wrong. he couldnt control you— if you didnt want to be with him anymore, who was he to stop you? he doesnt want to be with him either.

yet here he is, all alone, caving, curling into himself as he dropped to the ground, the apartment thoroughly wrecked. stuck with nobody but himself and his overwhelming devastation. his face twisted in what could only be described as pain, scrunching and folding in on itself. he was bleeding. he must have popped a staple when he was screaming, but he didnt care, not even as they pulled and tugged ever so painfully as he choked on another shout of anguish.

there he sat, a pathetic being in the middle of the life he made for himself.

there he sat, sobbing tearlessly as the boy who couldnt cry.

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rebelwith0utacause · 3 years

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It’s 2 am, but it’s a music tag, so I’m doing it. Thanks @5sosofficial, sleep can wait ✌😌✌

Edit: it’s 4 am, and I’m a long-winded bitch, so everything goes under the line.

Right, so, first order of business, 20 songs on shuffle:

5SOS - Talk Fast

The Band CAMINO - Berenstein

Phillip Phillips - Miles

Nao - Bad Blood

You Me @ Six - Liquid Confidence (Nothing To Lose)

Yves Tumor - Noid

Patric Fiori - Que Tu Reviennes

Bigflo & Oli - Dommage

Dido - Hunter

Anarbor - Tasty

5SOS - Empty Wallets

TOOL - Vicarious

Roseburg, Kellin Quinn - RIP

Jack’s Mannequin - Dark Blue

While She Sleeps - I’VE SEEN IT ALL

OK Go - Another Set Of Issues

Galantis - Runaway (U & I)

Zayn - BoRdErSz

While She Sleeps - GATES OF PARADISE

Julie Zenatti - Si Je M’en Sors

10 songs I’ve been listening to in no particular order:

Architects - Gone With The Wind

X Ambasadors - Unconsolable

Onlychild - Teeth

Bring Me The Horizon - Teardrops

While She Sleeps - FAKERS PLAGUE

5SOS - Thin White Lies

Architects - Animals

ASL - Voodoo

Ina Wroldsen - Sea

Normandie - Holy Water

10 albums that influenced my taste and made me a music snob (with commentary):

1. Linkin Park - Meteora

I think I’ve already talked about this, but I was in my early teens when this album came out, and I had a classmate that liked rock(ish music) so I went to the local CD shop that sold burned CDs (we won’t talk about it, 90s and 00s Macedonia was in a different century than the rest of the world) and asked for something cool and rock, and they gave me this CD. Now, like the nosy music nerd I was, I decided to play it once before I gave him the CD. Long story short, loved it so much, ended up buying him a picture frame and keeping the CD for myself. The angst in Chester’s voice and the tiny electronic twists together with the dark tunes made my teenage years (and still do) bearable.

2. Kyo - Le Chemin

I was maybe 9 when I first heard these guys on TV and fell in love with the guy in the red shirt. This was around the time I started understanding a bit of French and it certainly helped when a few years later I found a copy of this baby in our local French Institute. I’ve been listening to a lot of French music throughout the years, but nothing compares to this album. It made me understand emotions in French if that makes sense. There’s always a dark undertone to every song and I love how Ben’s able to infuse his voice with enough desperation/anguish/urgency while still talking about love.

3. Maroon 5 - Songs About Jane

Early teens again, on a vacation in Montenegro, bought it from a shop right off the beach lmao. The cover looked dope, and it was 2 euros. Mainly bought it because I loved that there was Jane in the title, a male name in Macedonian, also the name of the guy I had a crush on. When I went back to camp, he played it for me and he liked it as well (he was an employee there and a biiiiiiiit older than me). Little did I know that the syncopation, the embellishments and the raw energy Adam sang with in (only) this album was gonna make me compare every pop album to this one for years to come. This is like IT for me when it comes to pop music, even if it’s not entirely pop.

4. Six Pack - Minut Cutanja

I was 13, my brother wasn’t at home, so I decided to raid his computer for music. “Borrowed” a lot of punk music and this album which was titled just Six Pack. I didn’t really listen to Serbian music (tbh, I turned my nose at it bcs I thought it was something older people did, or ppl with no taste), let’s just say that living in a post-Yugoslavia world as a kid was fkn weird (@httpsgfg might agree). But there’s this song called 2 Minuta Straha (2 Minutes of Fear) which served as a soft transition to punk (punk-rock) for me, and consequently heavier rock and metal. Like, it’s such a great album, and made me open to finding other ex-Yu bands that sounded modern before their time.

5. Opeth - Blackwater Park

It was late 2007 and I made my first friend in high school (other than the ppl I already knew). She was this goth type that had a brother in a band and she listened to a lot of the music he listened to. Long story short, she showed me Bleak and that was IT for me. Loved the oriental vibes, the distorted guitars and the growls so fkn much. To this day I’m a growl > scream girl, and Mikael Akerfeldt’s to blame. Like... his growl is so smooth and homogenous, I love it, and wait until you hear his clean vocals. Top that all off with the jazzy solos and acoustic-sounding guitars, just makes it all so perfect damn it!

6. Avenged Sevenfold - Avenged Sevenfold

2007-2009 was definitely my a7x moment. I started my journey with Waking The Fallen, but The White Album (self-titled) was the pivotal one for me. There’s just something about the complexity of the composition, like the drums are fkn vicious, the guitars are more technical but also more melodic and the lyrics are liakfjndjflsdkjn! It’s also the album The Rev wrote some of my all-time faves like Brompton Cocktail, Afterlife and Almost Easy, and in hindsight... no, don’t want to think about it. But yeah, it set the bar for modern metal music for me.

7. Queensryche - Operation Mindcrime

Now, where do I fkn start with this one. Found it in 2009 or 2010, the peak of my prog metal days and I was just blown away that someone thought to create banger sonics with a banger backstory. Queensryche (at least those bandmembers back then) were absolutely genius in their craft, and I’m just sad they never got to make another album similar in quality.

8. Alice In Chains - Dirt

Back in the day, I really hated grunge, and if I’m being honest, I still hate Nirvana with a passion, hated the fact that musically they weren’t the best but got so famous post-mortem. I mean it’s not their fault, it’s their fans’ fault for being such dicks lbr. But in 2010 I bit the bullet and played me some AIC. I was trying to broaden my horizons so to speak, and grunge was next in line. Layne’s vocals had me hook, line and sinker. I’ve been a fan ever since and I even gave Soundgarden and Pearl Jam a chance.

9. The Police - Synchronicity

My mom’s to blame for this, she’s always liked them, and I used to listen to a lot of ska-influenced music as a kid (I still love it today). I think Synchronicity was the peak of their musicianship as a band and it’s just such an evergreen album. Like... It doesn’t sound like something produced in 1983, yknow? Sting is a mf genius.

10. Ludovico Einaudi - Divenire

The beginning of the last decade was a weird time for me music-wise. I think I wanted to make myself appear more grown-up in the eyes of ppl, and I got a lot of shit for listening to metal. So I went in all sorts of directions, from grunge, to pop-rock (ATL, Paramore that kinda thing), post-rock radio hits and even a bit of minimalist classical music and instrumentals. I used to play classical guitar, so this wasn’t really anything new, but the minimalist subgenre definitely was. I think I could classify my taste as sounding modern/timeless, I really don’t like music that’s stuck in a certain decade, and this album, or more like the song Divenire because that’s the one I’ve played the most, is exactly it. I could be 80 and still listening to this, thinking it just got released. This man is a genius.

Alright, almost 2 hrs after I first started writing this, I’m tagging: @tigerteeff @pxrxmoore @karajaynetoday @wheniminouterspace @httpsgfg or anyone who wants to do it. I guess I missed a few albums, but it is what it is.

#music tag #misc

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japanessie · 4 years

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MY FIRST STORY & Saitama Super Arena capacity

I received this question on Twitter regarding the attendance at MFS TamaAri Tour Final. I think it would be interesting to share with my readers especially for those who might aspire to enter the showbiz.

Disclaimer: Answers were based on my personal observations as a longtime music fan. Also, I used ONE OK ROCK as a comparison because that's what my readers are familiar with. Peace everyone 😊

Question:

So I just read that MFS TamaAri was 18000 tickets? Normally I know the venue has a much larger capacity, so why is that? Are they taking it safely? And do you know what’s more important to secure bigger venues? Is it to sold out or the number of tickets you had there? Just trying to understand if this was necessary to get to Tokyo Dome. It just kinda makes me sad because they deserve so much!

I always just assumed that it’s 37000, didn’t know there was two modes, any idea on what’s the difference and why they went with arena mode instead of stadium.

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MFS held an “arena" tour NOT “stadium" tour

First of all, from the start, MFS had declared their Kobe World Hall & Saitama Super Arena dates as “ARENA Tour". They never said “stadium". So, it only made sense that they booked Saitama Super Arena in its arena mode.

Based on MFS' proposed seating plan, they were honest from the start that they were NOT aiming for >30000 capacity. Just look at how small the space they allocated for standing spectators. The rest were all seated. They were pretty realistic about their crowd attracting capability & current limitations. They knew they were not OOR who could easily dedicate the entire floor area for standing spectators.

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Saitama Super Arena was designed to be mechanically multi-sized to suit multiple purposes

Look at the “Stadium vs Arena” diagrams from the venue's official website.

Saitama Super Arena does have TWO modes i.e "stadium" and "arena". It is a multi-purpose venue which means it can be used for concerts, sports events, exhibitions, death memorials (if you want) etc. Thus, to serve the different functions, it was designed in such a manner.

What is meant with max capacity of 37000 pax is the entire fixed seats taken up PLUS the maximum additional seating that the floor area can take, which is more suited for sports events where a smaller space for the athletes/performers is needed e.g. boxing, wrestling etc. For sports such as soccer or baseball, the floor area obviously will not be used for seatings.

Stadium vs Arena configuration

Stadium = the full length space with seats all around facing the centre.

Arena = the space is partially blocked off reducing the seats & floor area.

Stadium Mode

Let's look at a typical concert stage end side configuration.

1. A chunk of the space is already taken up by the stage. Meaning the seated area behind the stage is already unusable for the spectators. Then, some artists have a runway or even multiple runways extending into the floor area. To my eyes, at least 1/4 or even 1/3 of the space is already reduced. Then, when you put designated seats on the arena floor, the number of people will be reduced even more because chairs take up more floor space per person than a free-standing area.

Arena Mode

How about centre stage configuration to maximize the viewing?

Here is an example of a centre stage from KOBUKURO LIVE TOUR 2015 at Saitama Super Arena. Even with this configuration and a more packed crowd than MY FIRST STORY, this only packed in 21000 spectators.

http://music.emtg.jp/liveReport/20150806213e27519

For safety reason, you can’t pack in more people than the officially declared maximum capacity

I'm not sure how the Law is in Japan or what legal obligations that the management of Saitama Super Arena needs to comply. However, generally, it concerns evacuating people safely and quickly in the case of fire or any disaster.

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However, it looked like MFS didn't quite reach the number they were originally aiming for.

Got to be honest, there was a big block of unused seats at the end of the arena. The staff covered it with a huge piece of cloth. There was also some rather generous spaces around the floor seating area. They are not yet at OOR level who can easily attract >30000 crowd. But overall, it was good enough and not disastrous like the Shanghai show (unwise choice of venue that one... sorry my boys).

Photo by Taka Tallman

The difference of the Final outcome compared to the Original plan based on the official photo.

Why was it announced as "Sold Out"?

1. Logistics reason.

They needed to finalize the layout of the seatings and the number of chairs they actually needed. If they kept the ticket sales open to the performance day, it would be difficult for the staff to arrange the overall seated / standing areas. Notice how they often announced on-the-day tickets (toujitsuken) for their free standing Livehouse shows but not for Halls and Arenas. It's easy to squeeze in free standing audience as long as it is safe enough.

2. They very likely had already reached the sales target to cover the cost of the concert.

If you already sold out the quantity you needed to make profits, then it's not a lie to declare it that way. "Yeah, we sold out!". MFS is blessed to be an indie band because the money they earn mainly goes to them. Well, looking at the luxuries MFS members pampered themselves with (a huge rehearsal studio, holidays abroad, head-to-toe designer fashion etc), these guys made A LOT.

Despite playing to smaller crowds and playing less shows per year, MFS members are able to live comfortably at a more leisurely pace. Compare that to the major-label-and-talent-agency-tied OOR who certainly sell more in quantity but is being worked to death by their management with every Tour to make $$$!

3. In showbiz, image is everything.

Notice how once an actor won an Oscar, his publicity promo will always attach the term “Oscar winner (insert name)" with almost every appearance? Because it gives “value" to his name! Even if you only got nominated, being known as “Oscar-nominated actor" elevates your status.

It's the same with music artists. Saying “the band held a Sold-Out show at (insert a place)" gives “value" to your resume. The general public rarely ask the numbers or even question it.

Not only MFS, even OOR plays the same publicity game. For example, their Nagisaen show has always been hailed as attracting >100000 people. What is being downplayed is it was >100000 people over TWO days. Meaning >50000 pax per day and many of them actually went to BOTH days. But still, saying >100000 sounds better and it's not like they're lying. It's technically correct. So MFS saying, “Thank you. We sold out!" is technically true if they had passed their profit threshold. Anything extra is a bonus 😊.

Why still went for such a huge venue even though their fanbase still has not reached that level?

Just a basic management strategy no matter what field you’re in. Once you set a big target, you need to measure your achievement from time to time. They want to do Tokyo Dome. So, they need to see how far they can reach and what to plan to achieve it. With the Nippon Budokan, they knew that they could do 12000 pax. With Makuhari Messe and Yokohama Arena, they knew that 18000 figure was in their hands. With Saitama Super Arena, they very likely wanted to see if they could reach more than 20000. Now that MFS knew 20000 is a figure they need to still work on, they can plan from now what to do next. My prediction, there is a HUGE chance that the Tokyo Dome show would be fully or mostly seated.

What’s more important to secure bigger venues? Is it to be sold out or the number of tickets?

Strictly from the economic point of view, the number of tickets you can sell is more important. You'd want to earn enough to recoup your investment first & foremost. The venues don't care if your event is sold out or not. They just want their money. Being “sold out" is more for the artist's image.

Every artist has their own sales threshold of what they can call “sold out". MFS put limited standing tickets from the start which means they have a lower “sold out" threshold compared to a bigger band like OOR who allocates a lot more standing tickets.

The bigger your name, the higher the stake. I still remember when the late King of Pop Michael Jackson was deemed a failure for selling “only" around 45000 tickets for a stadium concert in the UK back in the late 90s.

So, was MFS playing it safe with Saitama Super Arena?

Nope.

On the contrary, they were daring themselves to take the risk in order to know where they are at. But hey, ANY indie artist in the world would KILL to have 18000 people per night. It’s awesome that MFS could reach that number as an independent band.

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My 2 cents

Why did MFS struggle a bit to fill up Saitama Super Arena?

To me it still boils down to one thing. Their archrival ONE OK ROCK.

This had been the first time ever that MFS was doing a major Tour head to head against OOR. They even had a few clashing dates!

* (Remember that Summer Sonic Tokyo (MFS) vs Osaka (OOR) incident? A small crowd in Tokyo vs a packed crowd in Osaka?）

OOR by Julen Photo

For the most part, getting the majority of their fans from OOR fandom has been a huge blessing for MFS. But we must take note that many of them still keep OOR as their main band and thus, are more likely to spend their money on the OOR Tour instead. Not to mention that OOR ticket & merch prices are higher.

MFS hardcore fans are still way smaller and probably will never top OOR, which is fine to me (seriously, I don’t want MFS to compromise their music like OOR did 😑 ). However, I do believe that the day will come when MFS can attract 30000 crowd in one show but it will take more time for that to happen.

But comparing it to OOR, it wasn’t too bad even though it is still a long way to go :-)

Someday MFS will be able to pack in fully standing crowds on the floor 😃 !

What MFS needs to do?

1. Keep on with their current strategy of reaching out and expanding to fans outside of the OOR crowd. Keep on collaborating, guys!

2. I personally hope that the little darling Hiroki can continue being careful with anything that comes out of his mouth so as not to make another faux pas e.g that misunderstood MC at Summer Sonic (OOR fans accused him of jealousy towards Taka again because of it... oops 🙈), that "kiddy tantrum" at Storyteller Tour Osaka (your warped sense of humour may not necessarily work outside of your band & crew, Hiro 😑). Watching him in the later part of 2019, I do feel Hiro had learned a bit from it all though.

3. Continue strengthening the bond with the existing fans. It’s important to cherish their loyalty. I had talked before about the benefit of keeping your core fans. Thankfully, MFS is doing it right in this area. Bringing awareness to ALS, dedicating their songs to special selected fans and helping in realizing their dreams. After all, support is a two-way street.

4. Connecting with the younger crowd like they did during the ALONE era with the “university tour” might be a good idea too 🤔. I still remember photos of the members walking through the crowd among the stalls at students’ fairs 😃. That was an exciting time 😊

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So, what do you all think 😃?

#reply #my first story #maifasu #マイファス #one ok rock #oor

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zrbillings · 4 years

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Pokemon Sword & Shield - Review

So it’s been a long time since I’ve reviewed anything (years in fact) and since video reviews take such an exorbitant amount of time and COPPA has made Youtube this very scary place right now; I figured why not do what I know and write a review.

So with that out of the way, let's talk about Pokemon Sword & Shield. These games appear to be super devicieve you’re either in #gamefreaklied #bringbackthenationaldex camp or you’re a ‘defender’. I find that I have a bit of a unique perspective on the game so I wanted to share my thoughts. I’ve just completed Pokemon Sword, and just so you out there in internet land know my qualifications because to Pokemon fans that seems they only real way to justify having a different opinion.

I was born in ‘91

Pokemon Blue was my literal first GB game.

If point 2 wasn’t enough I collected everything Pokemon and grew up watching the show, often playing the games while I did.

I’ve completed the National Dex

I’ve completed the Kanto Dex like 3x over.

And I’ve played various other spin-off games i.e. Colosseum, Stadium, Gale of Darkness, Trozie? Trozae?

And if you couldn’t put it together I’ve played through nearly every mainline game the only exceptions being. Alpha Sapphire, Diamond, Fire Red, Let’s Go Pikachu, Sun, Ultra Moon. Basically at some point if I owned one version that’s all I needed.

Okay! So with all that out of the way, let’s talk about these games. Plain and simple if you just want to know if it is actually bad, no it’s not, it’s good, one could argue great, I wouldn’t, but you could. If you like Pokemon, get over the National Dex and “It ShOuLD LoOk BEtTeR” and play it, it’s fun it’s Pokemon with some new gimmicks. 3 out of 5 I guess if you want to be critical. Okay so for the rest of you, the ones who are more critical and want to know what SUCKS, and what ROCKS. Keep in mind going forward I’m not addressing the whole stupid delemma of cut Pokemon or graphics, at least not in depth, you want to talk that crap just @ me I’ve got the time. So graphically it is undoubtedly the best looking in the series you literally cannot argue that, should it look better? Well, I don’t know, I think to expect it to makes you look stupid no matter what reasoning you want to bring to the table. Pokemon has literally NEVER shown interest in pushing graphics, they’ve almost never made massive leaps forward, the amount of times they have can be counted on one had, so to have expected more that’s on you, not them. I find them to be gorgeous, yeah there’s things here and there that could be better, but if you go looking for a problem in anything you’ll find it, you could find ugly stuff in Skyrim too, or even Final Fantasy 15. Characters are definitely more expressive than they’ve ever been, the towns are stunning and I feel unlike some of the more recent games definitely come off as more memorable even if you can’t name them, you can instantly picture them. Animations, while I totally agree should be better, shouldn’t have been expected to be more than they are, again this is Gamefreak they literally improve at a snail’s pace justified or not. That being said, while Pokemon aren’t particularly animated in battle, the game overall is the most animated in the series, and here’s why. Again characters are far more expressive, and are constantly moving even in battles when a Pokemon attacks the trainer makes an action, you have overworld Pokemon, you have each and every Pokemon able to do a handful of different animations in Pokemon Camp. You have the world itself that is filled with movement i.e. NPCs, scenery here and there, a good example being the town Ballonlea the Fairy-Type gym location in case the name doesn’t sound familiar. So yes while the animations aren’t particularly impressive, I would say they’re still the best in the series AS A WHOLE (can’t believe I need to specify that). The big draw of this game is the open are called The Wild, this is sort of what people who hate these games wanted an entire game to be like, but better. And I think while they could be bigger, they feel the right size in correlation to the size of the rest of the map, there’s plenty to explore and it is genuinely fun to roam around in especially online. That being said, the game definitely (at least for me) chugs a bit while online, but I wouldn’t say it ruined the experience at all for me. It was so cool to see other players setting up camps and running around, I will say however that while these things are cool, they could have been developed further. You can’t interact with these players if you engage with one they just give you a stock response and then hand you some sort of cooking item, which okay getting cooking items this way fantastic! But why not let trainers customize their greetings? A little especially while in camps? There’s just more they could have done here, I can understand not wanting to create a system where interacting with someone dead stops them in place in order to trade or whatever, that could get really annoying. But I find, there’s not enough here that really push this feeling of a shared space, like why not have brought back Secret Bases again? And had your friend’s bases show up that way if you did want to hang out and chat (through the terrible Nintendo App, or whatever superior option) you could! Like can you imagine? Instead of just having to camp outside and hang out with friends having like your own space to hang out, battle, trade. You could have made this space like an area where if you interact with a trainer a menu for those sort of things could be triggered. The Wilds overall are fun and they’re cool to explore for new Pokemon, I just feel they could have been experimented a little more with. I won’t prattle on any further, but just saying I’d love to see Gamefreak take this and push it harder next game. As an ending note I do fine the placement of The Wilds fine, at first it looks odd, but once you start playing given it’s function it makes sense, I think if the whole game were The Wilds like some people desperately want, you’d run into a lot more problems, with things like trainer placement, and how to limit progression, not saying it can’t be done, just that we’re a ways off from anything like that happening yet. I will say this though (sorry last thing I swear) I DO NOT like how the progression system of The Wilds works, the moment you enter it you can explore 90% of it, which fine, EXCEPT! The problem becomes that while you can explore nearly every nook and cranny of it you can only catch Pokemon in designated areas because if a Pokemon is over a certain level and you don’t have enough badges you just straight up can’t catch it. Which okay I can understand, but then I SHOULDN’T EVEN BE ALLOWED THERE! For example (and why I’m bringing this up) there is an area where you must cross a bridge to get into the next section of the lands, cool I think this is great it visually queues us, “hey this is a different section so logically the Pokemon will be stronger here.” The problem! Is while we in theory can piece this together literally nothing stops us from crossing, the reason this bothers me is because on the literal otherside of the bridge is I SHIT YOU NOT a MF Snorlax! Just chillin, doesn’t wander just stands there, while okay this is a great reference to other games. WHY WOULD YOU NOT! Just put him sleeping on the bridge like in every other game in this scenario, it bars the pass and players don’t waste their time exploring an area before they can get the most out of it. Plus! This game rewards you special Acorn Balls at each Gym, if you don’t know what these are they were in Gold and Silver they’re special Pokeballs that in this game are one of a kind that have awesome effects, the one I want to reference specifically here is the Heavy Ball which works better the heavier a Pokemon is i.e. “this ball was invented for catching Snorlax.” So it baffles me how Gamefreak didn’t do something like the last Gym before you’re able to wake up Snorlax and pass the bridge allows you to get a Heavy Ball thusly not only letting you finally progress into this new area, but also gives you an item as a sort of reward. Wow, sorry moving on. I find where this game really misses the mark is the story and the characters, outside Hop (who is insufferable early on) are really bland and sort of lackluster. I feel like this is a bigger thing to be upset about than animations and Pokemon count. Hop is one of the only rivals to truly go through a character arch which is amazing! He goes from this arrogant, insufferable, condescending, ass, to someone who just wants to be the best, but doesn’t act like he already is, he knows where he’s at and strives to be more. This huge development really, really shows how poor the rest of the cast is, the professor this time is boring, not even a professor really at least not like were used to. The champion is fine, but lacks any real charisma like the game wants you to believe he has. The other rival Bede is...under utilized? Like he comes around and it’s like, “finally! Gary Oak 2.0!” and he just sort of disappears about half way through the game and then pops up at the end. I’m not going to go through the whole cast, but everyone is more or less this same sort of doesn’t bring much to the table. As dumb as Team Yell are I actually like that they’re not the evil baddies of the game, they’re not even Team Skull level, they’re just kind of a bit of inconsiderate fanboys, they work well as a level progression block? System? Their use for impeding your progress until you’ve done the right thing works well is what I’m saying. The big thing with this game is it really lacks an evil team, it’s like The Aether Foundation all over again, except infinitely worse, while The Aether Foundation sort of slowly unravels at some point, the ‘evil team’ or in this case just two baddies, kind of feels like it comes completely out of left field and only happens because Gamefreak wanted a cool way to introduce the legendaries. It just felt super random and unsatisfying and that the motivations really didn’t make sense and happens right in the middle of the Pokemon League so it kills all momentum, and any tension the league did have. Which is another thing the league is shit, it’s bad, the idea is really good, it’s inspired by the show it feels like a proper tournament, but since you can heal and swap out Pokemon between each match there is 0 tension, and since the story just decides to interrupt it, it just doesn’t feel satisfying. Beating the champion doesn’t feel like an accomplishment because you’ve already beaten the big baddie just before him, and all the other trainers before him in two different sessions, it doesn’t feel like you went through this gauntlet of really tough trainers to reach him and prove yourself, it feels like no matter what you were always going to beat him, the game did literally everything it could to make sure you beat him! I felt fucking bad beating him, because it was so easy, I literally gave him a handicap, I used 0 healing items and beat him with two Pokemon to spare and that was also because I gave him another handicap where I didn’t switch out once I threw out a Pokemon! Gyms are back, but they kind of feel like they belong in Sun and Moon because you have to do ‘missions’ before each one before you face the leader which is fine, but I personally could have done without them, for the most part they're just glorified obstacle courses. I guess they feel like the same old stuff, but I think it’s the nature in which they’re handled that actually bother me and less of having to do them myself. I think in a way given how this Pokemon League is set up it would have made more sense to just completely do away with them, maybe put something else there in its place. The gym leaders are all really colorful and actually really well designed, they all have their own very defined personalities which is cool, It would have been cool to have actually seen more of them somehow. The last thing I’ll talk about as this review is already overly long is Dynamaxing. It’s fine, I will say that if it were up to me I would have changed how it’s handled, I think the raid battles are great, they’re really fun they make grinding for levels a fucking joke and I love it, it helps you find really cool Pokemon and strong Pokemon for your team it makes Online feel like there are actually other trainers out there in the world taking on this gym challenge besides just you, it’s cool, but I feel outside of the raids there really pointless. Each Gym Leader uses it always with their last Pokemon, and it never feels like it matters so long as you Dynamax yours at the same time and have type advantage it’ll feel like KO-ing any other old Pokemon except it’s big af.If it were me I would have changed it to Mega Evolutions, because they actually feel like they matter and then they could have introduced new megas and I’ll do you one even better! What about when after you beat the Gym leader they gave you the same kind of mega stone that they used! Maybe in place of TMs, or in conjunction with them rather than them giving you Gym uniforms you’re never going to wear. That’s more short and sweet two cents on the Dynamax system, it’s great for raids pointless for everything else. Kind of like the clothing in this game, and that’s all I’ll say about the clothing that and I think the uniform thing was dumb and should have only been used for the Pokemon League rather than every single Gym battle. And that’s it! That’s my very thorough review of Pokemon Sword & Shield. Like I said at the beginning, these games are fun no doubt, but they definitely aren’t even in the top 5. I think there’s a lot of wasted potential or cooler directions they could have taken these. There are definitely cool things like the different gyms for the two versions, The Wilds are fun to hang out in and run around, the new Pokemon are actually really cool, I love that they added more regional variants and not just for Kanto Pokemon, the towns are very visually memorable. But outside that, I’m kind of hard-pressed to think of much else, I can’t speak on the post-game either, but it doesn’t seem like there’s any if at all. This game simultaneously feels like the largest Pokemon game to date as well as one of the smallest.

#pokemon #bring back the national dex #gamefreaklied #pokemon sword and shield #review

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johnlockficclub · 5 years

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Discussion Recap - Author Q&A!

Well, JFC crew, we’ve reached the end of another fabulous fic! Thank you so much to everyone who read along and participated in the weekly discussions - you all are the best.

And of course, a huge thank you to @swissmissing for writing The Baker Street Nativity in the first place and for coming along to our Author Q&A to share some insight into her writing process and background to this fic. Questions and answers are below the cut as this got quite long!

And finally, thanks once again to @frodosweetstuff for allowing us to use her artwork for these update posts!

Happy holidays everyone - may you and your loved ones be safe and happy this festive season! xx

1: Why this AU? What got you started on it? @ewebie

I saw the movie and with MF in it, of course I immediately started thinking of how it could be a Johnlock AU. I do that frequently anyway: imagine Johnlock versions of stuff. I just watched a few Netflix Xmas movies recently and I am still thinking of how to turn them into Johnlock AU's. I see the world through Johnlock-coloured glasses. Is that healthy or normal? IDK.

2. Would you ever consider publishing your fanfic? @norburylibrary

No. First off, the story is obviously cadged from a copyrighted screenplay. To publish it for real, as an original work, I'd have to scrub the names and characters so that they don't interfere with BBC copyright. That part should be feasible, but the story itself is too close to the Nativity screenplay. As for any of my other fics, the non-fusion ones, I don't think I've written anything that could stand on its own without the Sherlock association. One of the huge assets of fan fiction is there is a built-in character background and setting. I'm not up to rewriting to the extent of creating something that could be published as an original work.

3. What do you enjoy writing most, humor or angst and why? @elwinglyre

I can do both, but I guess I'm more drawn to angst. I think humor is harder to pull off, for me at least. I'm not a naturally funny person. I have to think hard to come up with funny situations and lines. Confession: In some of my fics, there are certain punch lines that were actually written by my beta readers. I think Sherlock and John - in fact all of the Sherlock BBc universe - lends itself more naturally to angst anyway. although there are humorour parts in the eps, I find them more geared towards angst.

4. Was it confusing at all having seen the movie to then switch the roles? When writing it. @sherlock-nanowrimo

Yes, totally confusing at first! I started out with the "natural" roles, with John as the teacher and Sherlock as the assistant, but it wasn't working for me so somehow I just got the idea to try it the other way round. Once I started down that path though, it wasn't confusing for me. I was worried throughout that it would be confusing for readers. But everyone who commented and said they had seen the movie, also said the switch wasn't hard for them to deal with.

5. When you write is it because you get a fic idea or for some other reason? Like stress reliever or for doing something fun? @tildathings

Good question. I always want to write. I get a great feeling of satisfaction when I write something. Especially when I finish a piece. It's a big shot of dopamine for me. It carries me for a long time, sometimes days. BUT I can't force myself to write. I tried that one year with nanowrimo and it was not a good thing. So I can really only write when "the muse" grabs me. When I get an idea that sticks with me for days and weeks. And with this fic, it really came alive and almost wrote itself, once I was on the right track.

6. How much do you base your writing on the show and how much on your headcanon? @travelingwithoutthedoctor

This is a problem too, as I haven't gone back and watched the episodes in a really long time. Many of the eps I only saw once in the first place. I have the feeling that the fandom circles you travel in tend to create a fancanon that pretty much replaces the actual canon. So that's something I struggle with. I actually try when I write to imagine and hear the TV characters speaking and acting things out, in the hopes that it makes it closer to how they might actually be in those situations. I suppose that's unavoidable. I'm sure I do have an image of the characters in my mind, and I write from that. I just hope they are pretty aligned with the original characters from the show.

7. I thought you did an incredible job making Sherlock a teacher for young children credible. That wasn't something we'd think of Sherlock doing, and you made it work. What did you take into consideration when doing this? @elwinglyre

Woo boy, that's a thing! He is so completely unsuited for this position. I had to justify him being in that position, however, so I kind of hand-waved something. Honestly, it wasn't my priority. I was just trying to create Johnlock moments. I mean, I think he's actually quite good with children. We've seen that on the show with Archie. I think it would depend on the kids.

8. I’m curious about the speed of writing. How quickly do you get a chapter done? @vitruvianwatson

Once I get going, I can usually do about a chapter a week. My chapters tend to be 2-5K.

9. The UST, miscommunication and angst of this fic was deliciously frustrating, and a lot of us were yelling at them to just sort themselves out. If that was the hardest part about reading it, I'm wondering about what was difficult to write in this fic? Were there certain sections or characters that you found challenging? @lediona25

I was honestly following the pacing of the movie, pretty much. I did need to add some scenes. I tried to pace it so that there was a romantic bit about at the halfway point, and another one for the big payoff at the end. One challenging bit was the dog. I wasn't sure whether to include him, but once I did, I kept forgetting about him. I kept having to go back and remember where the dog was and who was taking care of him. I don't have a dog so I was just doing what I've seen other people doing with their dogs. They leave them tied up outside of shops and restaurants all the time so I figured it was okay. Again, it wasn't really a priority. A lot of people commented that they liked the dog in there though, so I'm glad I left him in.

10. It was perfect casting! We were talking about it during the movie - like with Greg as the headmistress. @sherlock-nanowrimo

That's one of the best parts of doing a fusion, for me anyway, is the casting. I love discovering how characters map onto each other. Sometimes it's astonishing. I HAD SO MUCH FUN WITH JIM!! I didn't want to make him actually evil or a real threat. It always gives me massive anxiety when Moriarty shows up in a fic because often truly awful things happen then. But I wanted to keep this in line with it being a kids' movie. And to be fair, I didn't really need to change all that much from the movie bad guy anyway. That nativity play he put on was insane! And I actually was just teaching one of my classes last year about universal story plots such as the hero's journey. (Yes, I'm an English teacher.) 11. One of your ficlets suggests some pretty unpleasant stuff re: Jim's backstory. @bluebellofbakerstreet

Jim's backstory. I kind of imagined he and Sherlock had been rivals at the conservatory and Jim had tried to derail Sherlock with drugs. Perhaps somewhat successfully.

12. What the hell is the story with Sherlock and whatever he did to Seb Wilkes?! @ewebie

I don't know either! LOL that is actually something I like doing in fics because, again, I like it when fics do that: hint at something but not elaborate and leave it up to you to decide what was actually going on. I guess maybe that's frustrating to some people but for me, it gives fics depth and realism. It's like in some fics where you just hear about a case in passing but the details are never fleshed out. I was using it to show that Sherlock had made poor decisions with kids in the past, so this thing he did with taking the kids to the studio wasn't out of character.

13. John... as a classroom assistant. How did you see him ending up there? Our conclusion was that... lost people just sometimes end up places @ewebie

I don't recall if it's explained in the fic or not, but I actually had something in mind for that. He was invalided out of the army and bumming around with nothing to do, feeling useless. His good friend Mike, who was also a teacher, recommended him to Greg as a classroom assistant. No idea if that would be allowed in the UK but here in Switzerland it's frequently done. Usually a retired person will be brought in as a classroom assistant. This keeps them active and engaged, and is a big help to the teachers.

14. We loved the whole scene with Moriarty at the end when Mycroft pops out and saves the day. You did a bang-up job with that. When you're finishing a story, are you one those "I've planned it all out" writers or stream of consciousness writers. Let's go with the flow? @elwinglyre

In this case, the ending was written for me. I just followed the plot of the movie. Usually, though, I do have the ending in mind from the start. It's usually pretty much a sex scene, lol. The whole point of the fic is usually, how do I get these two together?

15. Oh! The sex! Is that easy for you to write. I have the hardest time with that. Is something your really get into? @elwinglyre

True story (which I also told on one of my guest slots on the TPP): I didn't use to be able to write sex scenes. But I wanted to. So I literally would copy sex scenes from fics I liked. Just like, typing them out word for word. This got me used to writing those words and those acts on my screen. Then I tried writing my own. I think I sort of have a reputation for writing awkward-realistic sex scenes. I'm not aiming for that, it's just how they come out. It's a mix of, again, imagining how the characters would appear and act and speak in those situations, and also I guess how I would feel and want things to be.

16. We have a lot of people in this group who are just starting out writing fic or are thinking about writing something, do you have any advice to new writers? @lediona25

I'll just say what we started out talking about: Write for yourself. Write what you want to read. You will always have an appreciative audience. I see so many writers get discouraged because they don't have massive hits and kudos, and they just give up. I think most of the popular writers in fandom have been around for years. This may be their third or fourth fandom. They've been writing in real life. Experience takes a long time to build up.So write for yourself. The rest will come. And... at the moment, it feels a bit like there's less readers than 2 years ago, so really really don't be discouraged.

Thanks to all those who asked questions and to @swissmissing for her thoughtful answers! :)

#johnlock fic club #the baker street nativity

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inconstantsearchofperfection · 6 years

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A letter

For everyone who voted for donald t rump in the last presidential election, especially those that used the excuse that they were voting for the lesser of two evils.

Let me begin right off of the bat by saying :

Congrats, you have not only fucked yourself but me as well.

Now, let me address the different versions that I have heard why they considered donnie ( the lesser ) the lesser of those 2 evils.

No.1 they didn't like her voice.

So. You thought listening to don and the way he talks was better. Really.

You find his dull, sorta Bronx like - ish accent usage more soothing to your ears than an older more polished grandmother's. Mmmm

Interesting.

Well I don't.

I find his pedantic , near lobotomised orangutan impression fucking annoying as fuck.

Well then , her pants suits were annoying.

All those colors.

Yeah, his one or two fat covering dull styleless suits, with that long red licorice dogpenis tie are real exciting. I Love seeing him in what looks like the same fucking red tie every day.

This guy is supposed to be rich and he dresses like a cheap hooker every day.

Style and him have never once met.

Well , he talks better than her.

He talks on a fifth grade level.

He uses one syllable words most of the time and brings out the multisyllable words to describe things ... usually in the format of this: this thing I don't like is bad ...this thing I do like is good. Real simple shit... my four year old talks better.

Well. He s gonna clean that swamp.

It's swamped . That swamp is swampier than ever.

He'll bring American jobs back to America.

Nope.

He's costing Americans jobs.

We were doing pretty well in our recovery and he is currently taking steps to detour us and send us back into a recession or maybe head us back into a depression.

Well , he knows business , He's a business man.

He is a con artist. A huxter. A flimflam man.

A charlatan. The only person donnie makes any money for is donnie.

Well he s not hawkish like Hill.

Under the current administration in the first year they've done more drone strikes than the previous two administrations combined.

No.2

He'll put anti roe v wade judges on courts and he's pro life.

Yeah.

That is maybe the main reason some of you mf voted for him . The only reason.

You thought that this president who is crass, and dull, and at least he tells jokes better than that geeky old lady who doesn't seem to understand pop culture at all , you thought that this guy would help you get your anti abortion, anti womans' choice agenda passed.

But what you all didn't realize , what you don't seem to get is that that agenda is not " pro life " but pro pregnancy or pro birth or pro male dominant over women.

That pro life should mean life for everyone , a good life. Which should include not getting murdered, mothers being able to support themselves and their babies. Being safe on the streets. Being able to get a decent job. Being financially safe. Being physically safe. Having a chance in this country.

When you mf voted for tea rump.

When you muthafuckers voted for t rump.

When you motherfuckers voted for trump.

What In thee fuck went through your Goddamn minds.

Seriously.

You knew he was gonna be a little brat.

The man ( for lack of a better word) is 70 fucking years old. A ship doesn't just change course after 70 years. He wasn't gonna listen to the better of his angels .

Look at who and what He s surrounded by.

Incompetence and the corrupt.

You mf actually thought that djt was less evil than anyone else. Let alone a grandmother who tried to give you and everyone else healthcare. You thought that donnie was less evil than a woman who served the public good /hood for 30 plus years.

But let me get down to it.

You mean to tell me after just listening to that

Overblown, narcissistic, womanizing , pussygrabbing, cheating, painted orange, birdnest for hair , shit-for-style, lieing motherfucker for two minutes you couldn't tell who the lesser of two evils was?

You couldn't tell just by looking at him and listening to him that He was a giant piece of shit.

Seriously.

Have your eyes, ears, and head examined.

Something is fundamentally wrong with you.

Your sense of style.

Your morals, your ability to tell right from wrong.

Your i.q.

In closing , let me just offer a fond fuck you once more to everyone who voted for djt.

You haven't just fucked yourself you 've fucked everyone else as well.

You haven't just fucked yourself over.

You have also fucked over everyone else as well.

Next time ...use your fucking head.

#fuckyou #people who voted for #the lesser of two evils #use your fucking head

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sembell · 6 years

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Moving Forward - Chapter 54

It’s been some time, but the longer the wait the longer the chapter, I guess?! Thank you guys so much for your patience, your encouraging words and your constructive feedback! I still love writing this story as a way to escape into an alternate reality that, as of now, makes me feel so much better than the actual reality (whatever that is :P) The title of this chapter is based on my very first encounter with Gillian at the Toulouse Game Show in 2015, when I was standing in front of her, ready to get my poster signed. Her phone buzzed, she looked at it and went “Oh shit! Just a second, sorry!” and then typed something. Who knows what happened there, but this is what I made out of it for the MF-universe :)

NC-17 warning!

“Oh shit! Just a second, sorry!” Gillian Anderson

September, and with it the end of filming, came around much faster than expected.

Parting ways had always been difficult, but incredibly hard after spending three and a half months together - as a family.

A few days after wrapping, David and Gillian found themselves, once again, on completely different continents, thousands of miles apart from each other. When he’d started to film the second season of Aquarius in Los Angeles, Gillian had flown out to Nepal with Piper and her sister to shed Aaron’s ashes. Right after their short and highly emotional trip, she traveled to India to shoot her new movie Viceroy’s House.

The weeks went by excruciatingly slow, even though their days were always busy and packed with an enormous workload.

By the middle of October, she was still shooting the movie in Jodhpur while David found himself at the New York Comic Con with Mitch and Chris, starting the promotion of their six-episode-event-series.

Although she couldn’t be with them, she had sent a video of her sitting by the pool, sounding somewhat like Lady Mountbatten and making a teasing comment about one of the pool boys. David grinned to himself as the audience cheered, remembering all those hours they’d watched documentaries and recorded her voice during breaks, and how much they’d laughed over her weird accent.

They’d started the panel with screening the first episode, and the rest of it went smooth and enjoyable, mostly due to Kumail, whose love and excitement for the show was basically endless.

At some point, right in the middle of an audience’s question, David’s phone buzzed on his upper thigh. With a quick glance down, he saw that Gillian had tweeted something.

Lying in bed in Jodhpur watching live NYCC panel. Miss you guys. Especially one of you.

He pursed his lips and read it again.

Especially one of you.

And then again.

Suddenly, Chris had started to talk again, and David raised his head abruptly, his eyes wandering over the audience. He had no idea what the question was, but it was answered quickly, and Mitch was talking again. And that was basically the rest of the panel for David. He just wasn’t able to concentrate anymore, especially since his phone kept on buzzing with new messages coming from his little tease over in India.

“She just texted me about my flow,” David said bashfully as he followed Mitch off the stage. The panel had just ended, and they were already on their way back to the media area where they were supposed to give a couple of interviews.

Mitch chuckled, turned around and gave David a pat on the back. “Did she watch us live?”

“Yeah, she did.”

“What does she think about your flow?”

“She says it’s flowing just fine, she’s still turned on by the way I handle my chunky monologues,” David answered, and they both fell into hearty laughter.

There was another message that he’d received during the panel, which he didn’t show Mitch, that said:

> Is that handsome dude on my screen really my boyfriend? I miss him terribly <

She knew exactly how to sweeten him up.

> I thought he’s right there with you, providing cold drinks and fresh fruit? <

A couple of seconds later, she started to type, and it didn’t take long for another text to pop up:

> :P - I wish! Y’all looked fantastic though. I’m so sad I couldn’t be there and watch the episode! Is it any good? <

> It’s good, the audience liked it. <, he replied and began to chew on the inside of his cheek as a new wave of longing came over him.

Right then, he couldn’t have cared less about the episode. All he could think of was kissing her in that pool by her hotel, running his nose over her cute little freckles and smelling her delicious, sunkissed skin.

Yes, he was desperate. And who could really blame him after all those weeks without her? Though admittedly, it had started to become fun to play with all the possibilities they had nowadays to stay in contact and feel somewhat close. David especially had become a big fan of those little sexting games she would constantly come up with. He certainly couldn’t imagine his life without being able to play “Queen of the day” with her anymore.

Unfortunately, nothing was even remotely close to what it felt like to have her in his arms, kiss her beautiful lips and tell her he loved her while looking into her deep blue eyes.

A couple of weeks later, David landed at London Heathrow Airport on a gloomy Friday afternoon, tired to the bones and aching from a long week on set.

He had been looking forward to their first weekend together in what felt like forever, at least up until last Tuesday, when he received a call from a very angry, but also abashed Gillian, telling him that the convention she would attend this weekend wasn’t actually taking place in Paris, as she assumed it would, but in a little French town called Toulouse, which was basically in the middle of nowhere.

All their plans for a nice, long weekend together with the kids, visiting the Eiffel Tower, climbing the stairs of the Basilica du Sacre-Coeur de Montmartre up to the top, or eating years worth of crêpes and baguettes had died in a matter of seconds.

Instead, David decided to spend the weekend at home with the kids, not really keen to drag them out to a cold, snowy Toulouse, no matter how nice and interesting it might’ve been. With so many geeks in one small city, chances were they wouldn’t be able to have a very good time after all.

It was already dark when he arrived at Gillian’s house, and Erin, the kids’ nanny, was all set to leave for a romantic weekend with her boyfriend in a nice little cabin somewhere on the coast. David couldn’t possibly envy her more, even though he was starting to look forward to having some fun with the kids alone.

Over the last couple of months, it had become somewhat of a tradition that whenever he had Gillian’s kids for himself, he’d take them to places that served American food. The good, greasy and overly sweet stuff that the boys didn’t get too often, but of course loved tremendously. He’d lie if he said that he didn’t enjoy spoiling them - they were awesome boys, and they had a good relationship even without buffalo wings, chicken with waffles or s’mores, but he loved having a good time with them and seeing them happy and relaxed around him. And whenever he’d been away for a longer period of time, it was an easy way to skip the awkward first couple of hours to warm up to each other again.

They took the tube to a nice little place near St. Paul’s Cathedral and had a wonderful dinner before driving back home and taking Nelson for a long walk around the neighborhood.

The dog had become everything David had hoped he would when he gave him to Gillian - a wonderful, beloved buddy for her active young boys. Both Oscar and Felix were very dedicated to Nelson, and it was a delight to watch how much fun they were having together, but also seeing how much responsibility the boys had taken for the little guy.

When David had settled Eaden for the night, the boys showed him their new sports game on the Nintendo Wii, and they ended up playing tennis and golf way past midnight, having so much fun that David even forgot to call Gillian before she fell asleep in her hotel in Toulouse.

On Saturday, the four of them went to an indoor playground right after breakfast, and David spent the better part of his day counting heads, carrying Eaden back to the toddler area, which she was constantly sneaking away from to jump around with the big kids, and handing out snacks and drinks.

Around midday, he started to receive some hilarious text messages from an incredulous Gillian, asking him how anyone in their right mind could possibly confuse Toulouse with Paris and complain that she was freezing her ass off in the hall she was sitting in before she eventually sent him a picture of a squat toilet, labeling it “Welcome in Europe 2015”.

While David had a good laugh over it, he also felt for her. She deserved a weekend to relax, yet she was out there making other people’s dreams come true. He couldn’t admire her more right now.

Gillian was back at her signing table after the first round of photo op’s around 2 pm, frozen to the bone and overwhelmed by the number of people still waiting in line to see her.

It was fun though, really. She’d grown to like these conventions despite her fear of crowds and her aversion to public speaking.

Her fans were crazy, but most of them were very nice, lovely people, and knowing she could make them very happy by just being there and taking a moment to talk to them was bringing her an immense amount of joy as well.

Her phone buzzed beside her, and she only meant to take a quick glance at it, but the first three words immediately caught her full attention and set her on alert. It was a message from David, one that didn’t start very good.

“Oh shit,” Gillian exclaimed, taking her phone and looking at the young woman standing in front of her. “Just a second, sorry!” Gillian said with an apologetic smile and unlocked the screen before reading the entire text:

> Rufus is missing. I can’t find him anywhere. Erin said Eadie didn’t have him for her nap either. Do you remember seeing him around somewhere? <

And that was when the nightmare started.

Gillian hopped into the waiting limousine to leave the convention center by 7:30 pm, much later than she’d anticipated since she spent another hour at her table, meeting even the last person who hadn't gotten the chance to see her earlier today.

The rest of the day had been so busy that she didn’t get the chance to write David anymore, and his messages had piled up by now.

His immediate reply to her suggestions where the bunny might’ve been was:

> No, he’s not in the car and not under our bed, or any bed for that matter. Please come up with something a little bit more helpful. I’m running out of options here. <

There were four more rather desperate ones before she reached the last one:

> I can’t find it. I looked absolutely EVERYWHERE! <

Gillian inhaled sharply and turned her head to look out of the window as they were passing the crowds on their way home, or to the next bar.

It was raining again, or snowing, she couldn’t really tell. The cold and cloudy weather in the past couple of weeks was starting to get to her mood and overall well-being. As if only the sun could recharge her batteries. Maybe a nice long bubble bath back at the hotel and a decent sized burger with fries and a milkshake on the side would do the trick, too, Gillian thought, smiling to herself. Boy, she really wasn’t looking forward to making a call home and face the reality that her one-year-old’s heart was probably broken into a million pieces.

With an exasperated sigh, Gillian dialed David’s number and raised her phone to her ear. Better get it over with right away, she thought.

He picked up on the fourth ring.

“Hey, stranger. You're done with your day?”

Gillian smiled. “Hello, yourself. Yep, I'm completely done. Done, done, done in every possible way. My brain is just… mush.”

“I bet it is,” David said with a chuckle. “Lots of people, huh?”

“You have no idea. But now tell me what’s going on! How is she?”

“A-s-l-e-e-p,” he spelled, especially emphasizing the ‘p’ at the end, sounding both relieved and tired.

“Oh, wow,” Gillian said in surprise. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

“Yeah, me neither. But she basically cried herself to sleep on the couch while I was trying to make dinner. I guess it was an exhausting day for all of us, and now she’s lying half on top of Nelson - who’s also on the couch, I’m very sorry - clutching one of your hoodies to her face.”

“Oh no, poor girl,” Gillian said ruefully. The bunny had been on top of her mind since David’s first message, and she couldn’t really remember when she’d seen him the last time. On Friday morning when she’d gotten the baby ready for the day? Did Eaden have him in the car during their school run? Or… did they bring him to get a couple of groceries and actually lost him while strolling through Brick Lane Market? Which was, undoubtedly, the worst case scenario.

“Yeah, it’s sad,” David said, pulling her out of her thoughts. “She just doesn’t understand it.”

“Fuck, David. I feel so guilty. It’s all my fault.”

“No, Gillian. Things like that just happen.”

“Have you ever lost the favorite stuffed animal?”

“Well, no. But we’ve lost a bunch over the years…”

“Yeah, the ones that are forgotten the next day. But you usually don’t lose the favorite one because you never bring it with you when you leave the house. That’s the number one rule every parent knows… and usually follows.”

“Maybe we’ll find him again. I will keep looking, okay? Don’t lose any sleep over it, babe.”

“Maybe I should go out for a drink with David and Nicholas after all,” Gillian mused, referring to the American actors that had also attended the convention with her.

“Yeah, at least one of us should have fun,” he said with a light chuckle.

“I’m so sorry, David. I know this wasn’t what you were expecting from this weekend. Are the boys good for you at least?”

“They’re awesome. One of them was always with Eaden or looking for the bunny. They took off to play upstairs an hour ago when the crying got really bad, which I can’t blame them for, to be honest. I think they’re hungry and waiting for dinner now, so…”

“Oh, okay. What are you making?”

“Baked mashed potatoes.”

“Um, okay. Sounds… interesting.”

“Easy and… basically ready to serve. I gotta go, babe. I love you, you know?”

Gillian smiled as heat rose to her cheeks. “I love you, too. Very much.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Finally.”

“Yes, finally. Good night, Gillian.’

“Good night, David. Please give the kids a kiss from me, okay?”

Rufus hadn't miraculously resurfaced by the next day, which pretty much sealed the deal for David that Eaden’s favorite stuffed bunny had in fact gotten lost in the streets.

After lunch, which the baby had refused to eat even though it had been pizza, David found her in the library rummaging through one of the bookshelves.

She didn’t even look up when he kneeled down beside her. “What are you doing, slugger? Are you redecorating Mommy’s books?” he asked, running his hand over her back.

It was only when she turned her head that he saw the tears running down her cheeks again.

“Ufus!” Eaden sobbed, her bottom lip stuck out so far that a bird could have perched on it.

“Oh honey,” David sighed. How often could his heart actually break for this little girl? She was looking at him as though he was the only one who’d be able to make everything okay again. There were so much hope and expectation in those piercing blue eyes. How he wished he could take away her pain. Or at least be able to explain what was going on.

Thankfully, she fell asleep in his arms after he’d picked her up and laid down on the couch with her.

But it was barely an hour later that Eaden couldn’t be soothed anymore.

David was leaning against the kitchen island with a screaming, wiggling Eaden in his arms when he heard the front door being closed and someone in heels walking through the hallway.

He had a tight hold on Eaden’s little feet as Oscar was standing right in front of him, looking up at his sister with worried eyes while he was gently stroking her arm.

Felix was sitting on the couch, holding his ears while staring at David’s iPad.

Oh boy, Gillian thought as she caught the first sight of them. It was worse than she’d expected.

Putting her bags down, she gave David a weary look as she approached them, but could see a hint of relief crossing his own features.

“Hey, you guys. What’s the matter here?”

“Mum!” Oscar exclaimed and ran into her arms, embracing her waist. “We weren’t able to find the bunny.”

“Mummy, she won’t stop screaming and we looked everywhere!” Felix complained from his position on the couch, not even attempting to get up and give her a hug.

“Yeah, we did! We thought Nelson might have taken it, but it’s nowhere in the house! She must’ve lost it somewhere outside.”

“Oh dear,” Gillian sighed and ran her fingers through Oscars hair before leaning over to give him a kiss. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“Nope,” Felix stated, cringing as Eaden let out another loud wail and plugging his fingers back into his ears.

“Hey, baby girl,” Gillian cooed and walked towards David and Eaden with Oscar following her closely. With four fingers of her right hand stuck in her mouth, she was clutching David’s neck with the other, and her head was resting against his shoulder as though she’d literally no energy left in her to hold it up herself.

“Look! Mommy’s home, baby. Everything’s alright now,” David whispered, gently bouncing her up and down.

Gillian snorted and started to rub Eaden’s back to get her attention. She seemed to be completely out of things, and her whole body heaved with convulsive sobs, each one wracking her harder than the last. It sounded pretty much like she was choking.

Her normally bright, sparkling blue eyes looked glassy, and the white in them had turned into a bright pink. Only her cheeks were redder than her eyes.

Gillian felt her daughter’s forehead with the back of her hand, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“She’s hot.”

“Yeah, she’s been crying and screaming on and off for hours now. She didn’t eat anything at all and only managed to take a couple of sips of tea here and there,” David said, worry and remorse evident in his voice.

“M-hm, it’s hard to make her drink anything when she’s so upset,” Gillian squeezed his arm reassuringly.

He managed a weak smile before asking, “You want to hold her for a bit?”

“Yes. Just let me change into something clean and comfy, okay?”

“Yeah,” he nodded and put his hand on her upper arm as she was attempting to walk away, pulling gently. “Hey,” he whispered, his smile soft but tired.

She raised her arm and stroked his stubbled cheek before putting her fingers around his neck and pulling him down for a chaste kiss. “Hey,” she whispered as she pulled back. She’d pictured their first kiss after weeks a little bit differently. “Hang in there, I’ll be right back.”

The crying got worse again once she’d left the room to head upstairs, and it resonated even up to her bedroom. Gillian could count on ten fingers the times she’d heard one of her kids crying like this, and it had mostly been Eaden with her newborn colics. The memories of spending hours walking around and bouncing her to ease the physical pain were still very vivid. But how on earth was she supposed to help her one-year-old with her emotional struggles?

Gillian sighed as she quickly undressed and walked into the bathroom to wash her face. No matter how many kids one had, parenthood would always be a challenge, and it would never be simple.

She came back to David pouring what she guessed was fennel tea, Eaden’s favorite, into a sippy cup while their daughter was now sobbing directly into his shoulder. They always made a whole can in the mornings and let it cool down. Gillian hated it, couldn’t even stand the smell anymore, but Eaden was chugging it down like crazy. On a normal day, at least. She really hoped Eaden would take it.

She went over to Felix first, who had been joined on the couch by Oscar, to make a point and give him a kiss hello. He smiled at her bashfully when she ruffled his hair before finally pulling her down for a bear hug. No matter if she was gone for a weekend or a couple of weeks, they always seemed happy and grateful when they had her back, and in need of a lot of cuddles. She hoped she’d get the chance to spend some quality time with both of them before she had to fly out to Belfast on Tuesday.

“Hey sweetheart, look what Daddy made you! Your favorite tea!” Gillian tried to sound as excited as possible when she stepped beside David, who let out a frustrated sigh while trying to screw the lid with one hand.

She gently put her hand over his, gave it a reassuring squeeze and took the cup to close it.

“Eaden, Mommy is here now. Have you seen her?” David murmured, gently trying to loosen her tight grip on him so she would at least take a look. He still couldn’t believe how hard it actually was to peel a tiny, clinging toddler off of you. “Eaden, please,” he begged, and Gillian could tell that he was giving everything not to sound annoyed or harsh. It must’ve been a horrible weekend for him, especially after not seeing them for such a long time.

“Okay,” Gillian nodded, put the cup on the counter and started to take the baby away from him.

She was holding on for dear life, pulling at his shirt and stretching it as far as possible before he finally got to open her fingers around the fabric, and she let go.

Gillian had just turned her around and settled her on her hip to take a look at her when Eaden broke into full-blown bawl, arched her back and suddenly threw herself backward so forcefully that if David hadn’t been there to catch her, Gillian would’ve dropped her.

“Jesus Christ,” Gillian breathed in utter shock, her heart now beating rapidly in her chest. Eaden’s cries once again intensifying.

David nodded, running his large hand over Eaden’s small back while Gillian was holding her tightly, even though she was squirming in her mother’s arms.

“It’s alright baby,” Gillian tearfully choked out. She felt horrible. Eaden had never resented her like that before, and it stung.

If she only had been there for her over the last two days.

She looked up to meet David’s eyes. “Do you think it might help if I retreat into the library and lay down with her?” Gillian asked, cradling her daughter’s head in her palm and bouncing her gently.

“Yeah, you do that,” David said softly and leaned forward to kiss her forehead before handing her the sippy cup. “I’ll be out here if you need me, okay?”

“Yeah. Thank you,” she whispered, hoping he knew how grateful she was for everything he was doing for her. Flying over for the weekend to watch her two boys, their daughter and the dog all by himself was more than she was expecting from him, especially since she didn’t even have to ask.

He found them peacefully lying in the raffia glider a while later. The library was one of his favorite rooms in her house. It was peaceful and comfortable, and he loved to come in here, browse her bookshelves and lay down with a book that caught his interest. David even had a shelf for his own books in here, and sometimes, he’d find a book in it that she’d bought him, one she thought he would like, or one she just really wanted him to read.

Eaden was slumped against Gillian with her head resting on her mother's chest, her little body still shaking with an occasional sob. With one hand, she was fingering a few tendrils of her mother’s hair that had escaped out of her ponytail. The other one was holding onto Gillian’s shirt.

“Hey, it’s so quiet in here,” he said with a soft smile and let himself slump down onto the blue sofa beside them.

“Yeah, finally,” Gillian said, her voice just above a whisper, and looked at her little girl.

Eaden had stopped drinking, but Gillian was pleased that she’d managed to drink at least half of the cup. Her eyes were still open, but she was staring at nothing in particular, her little fingers absently playing with the collar of her black shirt before disappearing underneath it again.

Gillian sighed. It was so tempting to give in, to go 10 steps back, ruin everything they’d worked for over the last eight weeks and just let her nurse, even if it was just for comfort’s sake.

“Babe, don’t,” David said quietly as if he’d read her mind, his eyes warm and full of affection. “I know what you’re thinking, but it won’t help her, or you, in any way.”

Gillian nodded and buried her nose in her daughter’s soft blonde hair. He was right, of course; the whole process was a nightmare she didn’t want to start over again. She couldn’t do that to Eaden, or to herself.

For Gillian, it was an emotional rollercoaster of unknown dimensions. Some days, she thought she was experiencing something similar to postpartum depression. She had to excuse herself from meetings or during filming to cry in private multiple times in the last couple of weeks. Had found herself on the verge of a panic attack every Monday morning when she was about to leave for Belfast, or felt completely unable to get up in the mornings and go to set.

On other days, she was incredibly relieved that she didn’t have to offer her body to a little person every waking hour of the day, or night, anymore. While she loved being close to the kids and loved providing the physical comfort each child needed, there was definitely a certain point when she started to feel very anxious, claustrophobic and protective of her own body.

One night back in the beginning of September, she’d broken down into tears after another day of tugging, fumbling, holding, carrying and rocking a cranky toddler, just to be used as a human pacifier at bedtime, and hours beyond.

Just the thought of having to hug or kiss David, or give herself out to anyone else on top of that made her heart race and her stomach clench. She was feeling incredibly overwhelmed and irritable pretty much all the time. Touched out, as some were calling it. And she found that this description was pretty fitting to what she had been feeling over weeks.

When Gillian had finally come to the conclusion that she couldn’t carry on like this, David met her with an immense amount of sympathy and appreciation. He’d been the one encouraging her to make whatever changes she had to in order for her to be able to take and do whatever she needed to remain happy and healthy. In the end, Gillian was quite surprised to find out just how invaluable her intimacy with David and the sheer feeling of being a desirable human being was to her sanity after all. And that by regaining some of her emotional and personal space, she quickly became much more relaxed and approachable again.

For Eaden, it seemed to have similar effects. She appeared to be much more independent and mature all of a sudden, boldly exploring her surroundings without looking back in search for Gillian quite that often anymore. But she was struggling to accept all the other ways to be close to her mother as the new and sole sources for comfort and security, and that nursing wasn’t one of them anymore.

She simply didn’t understand what was going on, and her coping strategies varied from crying for Gillian at night, throwing tantrums and downright begging to very creative attempts to change her mother’s mind, like pulling coy and funny faces, or even offering Rufus Gillian’s ‘na-na’s’. “Omise na-na Ufus, Mommy,” she would say, probably thinking that her mother was too polite to say no to Rufus when he’d already been promised something.

The look of rejection on her child’s face was unbearable though, as was having to say “No” over and over again, no matter how sweetly Eaden was looking at her. Or how heartbroken she was over the loss of her favorite stuffed animal.

“She probably thinks we keep punishing her, David. And of course, she has no idea why we’d do that.”

Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t argue with that. It did indeed feel like they were pulling the safe ground they’d tried to build over the last two years right from underneath their child's’ little feet.

Nothing had ever been really easy with Eaden. Maybe it was because of their own, rather advanced age for being the parents of a baby, or the fact that she was definitely their last child, but both him and Gillian were incredibly attached to this kid.

David only knew that guilt was playing a big part for himself. Not only that they weren’t living together and working all over the world, therefore dragging the little one from one place to another, but because their daughter had two parents who would probably not be able to be by her side for the bigger part of her life. He could be extremely grateful if he’d make it to her thirties. And that… didn’t feel really good.

Being aware of that, they were working hard on providing her with a secure, nurturing environment and making sure she always felt safe and loved.

Right now though, it seemed like they were failing miserably. Or maybe, he thought as he was looking at them, it was just him who was failing his daughter, and Gillian, by constantly being away from them.

“You’re a terrific mother, Gillian. I know I don’t say it enough, but I’m constantly amazed how you handle all of this; four kids with completely different needs and expectations. Mostly by yourself.”

Gillian gave him a warm, lopsided smile and shook her head slowly. “I’m not by myself.”

“I-, I know you don’t see it that way… with Erin being around and the boys spending half the time with Mark. But when it comes down to it, it’s your opinion and your decision that counts. You are the mother and you know all of them better than anyone else.”

“David,” she said and held out her hand. He reached up immediately and took it in his. “I couldn’t be the mother I am, or trying to be, without you. I’m thankful every day that the three of you are the best father’s I could’ve possibly chosen. But this,” she made a circle like motion with her head, “is only possible because of you and me together. We haven’t seen each other in what, six weeks? And you come here, all the way from LA, knowing I won’t be here most of the time, just to watch the kids. Not just our kid, but mine as well.”

“That’s the least I could do after you’ve watched them for six weeks,” he stated.

“It’s only about being able to rely on each other. I have your back and you have mine, right?”

Right, he thought. Just sometimes, he felt like it wasn’t enough.

Eaden let out a soft whimper and turned her head, searching for David. “Daddy,” she murmured, extending her left arm towards him.

“Yeah, baby,” he said and let her wrap her tiny hand around his thumb before he closed his fingers completely around it. “Daddy’s here.”

The tiniest hint of a smile played on her lips as she borrowed her face deep between Gillian’s breasts and let out a content sigh.

“Come here,” David said softly, holding Gillian’s hand while she was climbing into the tub to join him, hissing when her heel met the water. “Careful.”

“It’s hot,” she said, squeezing his hand tighter.

He raised his right eyebrow and gave her an amused smile. “Hot? I’m sitting in here, it can’t be that hot for you.”

“I told you, I’m frozen to the bones. It probably feels hotter than it actually is.”

“Alright, take your time,” David nodded, putting his hands on her hips as she slowly climbed in.

When she was finally standing between his legs, he let his hands fall down to her upper thighs and leaned forward, placing soft a kiss against the mole on her right butt cheek before gently biting into her flesh, just where her ass met her thigh.

Gillian giggled and braced her arms on the edges of the tub to ease her body into the warm water. Once the bubbles had covered her breasts and his arms had come around her middle, she let out a satisfied moan and leaned back against his chest.

It was almost 8 pm now and all three kids were asleep. After getting Eaden to eat a couple of bites of the leftover mashed potatoes for dinner, Gillian gave her daughter a quick bath and rocked her to sleep before tucking her into her crib, not leaving until she was sure the little one wouldn’t wake the second she left the room.

The boys had been patiently waiting for her on Oscar’s bunk bed to tell her everything about their weekend with David. There was a brand new Star Wars Lego-set they’d started to build in the middle of the room, and they proudly showed her the letters they’d received from their teachers to inform their parents about their impeccable behavior in class in the last couple of weeks. The Lego-set, so they explained, was David’s reward for them. Gillian could barely contain the amused grin the entire time they were talking. David really was… something else. The relationship he had built with Oscar and Felix was a fascinating one. There was a great deal of respect, curiosity, friendship and lately, probably since Vancouver, she really thought she could see love between them, too. Something very similar to the love between a parent and a child, still developing its roots, but very beautiful to witness. Something Gillian had never dared to hope for it to happen.

She laid with the boys for a while, listening and cuddling before giving them both kisses and hugs good night, turning off the lights and leaving their room to search for David.

She found him in the master bathroom, already sitting in a bubble bath between a sea of lit candles. She felt like crying of gratitude for this sweet man.

“Feels good?” David asked softly.

“Hmm, feels like heaven. I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Yes, me too.”

“By the way, I stumbled upon that… huuuge Lego walker-thingy in the boys’ room.”

“Oh?” David chuckled almost nervously. “Am I in trouble?”

Gillian laughed. “No, of course not. It looks extremely expensive, though.”

David shrugged, cupped a handful of water in his palm and let it run down her upper arm. She smiled and leaned further back, resting her head beside his.

“Boy, I need a vacation. A very long one.”

“Hmm,” he nuzzled her cheek with his nose. “What are you thinking of?”

“I think of multiple things.”

“Of course you do,” David chuckled and brought his index finger up to her nose, placing a tiny bubble of soap on its tip.

“Hey!" she giggled girlishly and wiped her nose before giving him a chaste kiss.

"What are you thinking of?" he eventually asked, absently caressing her forearms with his thumbs.

"Hmm, a private rooftop or balcony pool from where you can see a beautiful, white beach.”

“Oh,” he nodded approvingly. “That sounds promising indeed.”

“A big bed.”

“One with enough space for all our children?”

“No!” she nudged him playfully in the side. “No kids.”

“No kids?”

“No. At least not the entire time. The big bed would be ours alone. Enough space to eat a big breakfast and read the papers in the mornings. Or for all the food I’d order from room service in the middle of the night while we’re all sprawled out, watching Trash TV. Or-”

“Or?”

“I don’t know… what else can you do in such a big bed with no kids around?”

David shrugged his shoulders. “I have no idea. It’s not like I’m used to having a big bed just for the two of us anymore.” God, he wasn’t even used to the way she felt in his arms anymore. Had she ever been this tiny?

“Yeah, true. Hmm, maybe we’ll think of something once we’re there.”

“So this is the beach vacation somewhere nice and warm?”

“It is, yes.”

“Maldives, maybe? One week with the kids and then another… for us? Just you and me, a private little house on the ocean with a balcony pool. You completely naked the majority of the time…” he said dreamily, and she started to giggle.

“Sounds so heavenly, can’t we go now?”

“That would be something, wouldn’t it?” he nodded.

“Seriously, David,” Gillian said and turned her head so that she could look into his eyes. “I can’t go that long without seeing you anymore. It’s… getting harder and harder every time. And it’s just that… sometimes, I feel like…” she paused, pondering her next words while stroking his forearm with her thumb absently, “...not that we’re neglecting our relationship per se, but that it… gets lost in the shuffle, sometimes. Often. You know, with work, and the kids, which is completely normal, but… I wish we’d have more time for ourselves. To do adult things…”

“Oh,” he said appreciatively and waggled his eyebrows, making her snort before she went serious again.

“Yes, those things, and just… explore places without pushing a stroller or without having to stop at every other ice cream stand. Go to museums, meditate together, spend a night in town, just,” she sighed, “we don’t necessarily have to do all those things, but it would be nice to at least have the time that we could if we wanted.”

“I know what you mean,” he nodded.

“But it’s mostly just the... mundane things that I miss the most. Like sharing a meal in the evenings, or going to bed together. Not having to sleep alone…”

“Yeah. I miss that, too,” he said with a sigh and rested his chin on her shoulder.

At least they were happy, that was what he was thinking when he was lying in bed alone on one of those many lonely nights these days. He felt whole knowing he was hers, and she was his, no matter where they were.

“So,” David said, “about the vacation…”

“Mh-hm,” Gillian hummed.

“Is it a good thing that I… booked us a weekend in Budapest in March? Just for the two of us?”

Gillian opened her eyes and blinked before looking back at him, surprise written all over her face. “What? Are you serious?”

David chuckled. “I am, yes. Being the only one who has full access to your schedule certainly has its perks when it comes to making a surprise perfect.”

“Oh my god, I love Budapest! I will show you all the beautiful sights! And I will give my friend Zoltan a call, who has a nice little restaurant there, and ask him if he cooks us the best Hungarian food you’ll find on this planet before we’ll head to the coolest bars you’ve ever been to! And because we also need some time to relax, we will go to one of their famous baths!”

“I love when you’re so excited. It’s adorable.”

“That’s really nice of you, David. I always wanted to do a city trip with you. And I would love to go on a nice shopping tour again. Budapest is great for shopping,” she nodded with enthusiasm, but then seemed to reconsider.”Although I can’t do that with you.”

“Why not? Didn’t you say that I’m a very patient shopping companion the last time we went together?”

“I did. But I can’t blink twice and the cashier already has your credit card in their hand,” she smirked at him.

“And? Correct me if I’m wrong, but you would’ve made it clear if you didn’t like a little bit of spoiling every now and then,” David winked and leaned in for a kiss.

“Hmm,” Gillian hummed approvingly.

“Am I right?” he prompted, his breath brushing against her neck.

“Mhh, yeah, you are. The apples don’t fall far from the tree, you know?” Gillian tilted her head to the side to give him better access to her skin.

“So I’ve heard,” he murmured, teasing her with delicate kisses so faint she didn’t dare to breathe, too afraid to miss a single one of them.His hands had started to roam over the flatness of her belly, fingertips tickling the sensitive skin between her breasts up her neck, and eventually drawing little circles right under her ear.

The simplest touches of his hands had the power to make her squirm like a cat in heat, unable to ignore her bodies basic needs. To be touched. To be loved.

They were lying there silently beside the occasional giggles while washing each other until the water started to turn too cold for her liking.

David knew that she could lie there for hours, refilling the tub with hot water every now and then, but he had something different in mind. It didn’t take a lot of convincing to make her get up and let him rinse both of them off before wrapping her in a big, fluffy towel.

He’d barely gotten a chance to dry himself off and she was impatiently pulling him back into the bedroom by his hand, her own towel left behind on the bathroom floor.

She fell back onto the mattress and pulled him on top of her, both giggling like two young people who’d just fallen in love with each other. Yet they were doing this for almost 25 years.

Languid kisses quickly turned into something more serious. Hands were roaming and hips grinding against each other for a little bit of relief. Their bodies were still warm and soft from their bath, and the sensation of skin to skin was unbelievably arousing.

Their breaths were coming in shorts pants when David broke away from Gillian and gently moved her into the middle of the bed, making sure that her head was comfortably propped up on a bunch of pillows before kissing his way down, caressing very scar and stretch mark on her perfect little body. There really wasn’t anything not beautiful about her.

He had just placed a couple of kisses on her pubis and outer lips when Gillian moaned out loud, and he quickly looked up from between her legs, surprised by her strong reaction. He hadn’t even come close her clit yet her back was arched and he already needed to shush her.

“Shh, not so loud,” he whispered, caressing her tummy with his flat palm, his smile giddy and reaching up to his eyes.

“David,” she said in a half warning, half desperate voice, glaring down at him. “It’s been six weeks with only my own fingers down there. I will scream this place down if you don’t continue, and nobody wants that to happen, right?”

“What about screaming it down because I’m continuing?” he teased, but earned nothing but a blank stare, telling him that she wasn’t in the mood for his jokes anymore.

He continued easy on her, his thumbs caressing her inner thighs, nuzzling her slit with his nose while kissing and licking the soft space between her pussy and her ass. She was dripping wet already, her hips softly rotating.

Her face was still relaxed, though. Eyes closed, cheeks flushed, bottom lip lightly tucked between her teeth. It was rare that she was so content and comfortable, only concentrating on the sensation of his touch, and he loved seeing her like that.

When she put her left foot flat on the mattress beside his shoulder, basically opening up for him, he knew the teasing was over, and she needed more.

The second loud moan didn’t come as unexpected as the first, but David had to retain himself from looking back and check if she’d closed the door earlier. She probably had. At least he hoped so.

As if she could read his mind, or maybe it was his slackened tongue that had given him away, she reached down and tangled her fingers in his hair.

“Relax. The door is locked,” she murmured, licking her lips in anticipation of what was coming next.

David rested his cheek against her inner thigh and glanced at her beautiful, open pussy right before him. It was sensory overload - the pink, glistening flesh with the perfect little nub poking out of the middle and that divine, feminine smell of hers.

She had never been shy about this particular part of her body, while there were others, much less private ones, that she didn’t feel entirely comfortable with, and wouldn’t let him look at for too long. It was a miracle that she’d let him get away with kissing her ass.

Her hand suddenly came in his vision, the index finger stroking his cheek a few times before she ran it through her folds.

“Whenever I did this, when I touched myself, and made myself come, I was thinking about you, and those long, skilled fingers of yours,” Gillian said, her voice low and sultry.

David swallowed, pressing his hips into the mattress. His cock was hard as a rock. Almost painfully so.

“About your lips on my clit. Or just about you… fucking me.”

“How?” David coaxed out, watching two of her fingers disappearing into her wetness. “How did I fuck you?”

“Hard. You fucked me hard, David. Like you did in that tent on the last day of shooting. You remember that, right?” she asked, pressing herself against her palm.

How could he possibly forget that? It had been a tent with no solid walls in the middle of the set. Everyone could’ve walked in at any given time.

“I remember,” David nodded thoughtfully. What a great memory it was. “You weren’t able to keep your voice down back then either.”

“Hmm. What can I say,” Gillian said, pulling her fingers out and resting them on his bottom lip. With a growl, he opened his mouth and welcomed them in. “You do this to me.”

“Hmm,” he hummed around her fingers, swirling his tongue around them.

“Were you planning on fucking me tonight?”

David huffed, pushed her hand aside and leaned down and sucked her clit between his lips.

“You bet I was,” he murmured against her hot flesh. “Fuck babe, when I’m done with you, you won’t be able to walk for the rest of the week,” David added and dove in for good, sucking as much of her tender flesh into his mouth as possible, rubbing her clit with the flat of his tongue.

She’d braced herself on her elbows, watching him with a smug expression on her flushed face, and it was the hottest thing on earth. She was a demanding lover with very high expectations; a woman who knew exactly what she needed, and how to get it. When you got her looking at you like that…

“Oh fuu-huck,” Gillian moaned and threw her head back, nails digging into the mattress, bunching the sheet between her fingers.

… or moaning for you like that, you could consider yourself the luckiest guy on earth. Because this was… mind altering. Unbelievably fucking sexy.

His erection felt hot and gigantic between his pelvis and the mattress, pulsating with each heartbeat. He couldn’t help himself but grind it against the soft sheet, again and again, probably leaving one hell of a wet spot there.

Her hips bucked up against him, and he felt a new rush of her hot wetness on his lips that he greedily lapped up.

“Hmm,” David hummed, watching her in wonder.

A single strand of hair was now sticking on one side of her face, and he could see a soft layer of sweat glistening on her forehead. She was licking her lips, biting them, pouting, opening her mouth only to press her lips together a couple of seconds later, then opening it again for a low moan. There was so much happening on her face at once, he just couldn’t look away. With every lick and every suck, her expression changed.

Eventually, she opened her eyes again and met his gaze.

“So close,” he whispered. It wasn’t a question. “So beautiful.”

At the same time as she reached down, David reached up and took her hand in his, giving it a light squeeze and put both of their hands down beside her hip.

His other hand snuck under her thigh and lifted her leg over his shoulder and onto his back, surrounding himself with her almost completely before putting his mouth back on her pussy, gently nibbling and licking, building the tension once again.

Her chest heaved as she struggled to control her breathing. She squeezed her thighs around his head and lifted her hips, hoping he would get the cue.

He didn’t disappoint. Of course not.

His free hand snuck between her legs, and she could feel his thumb entering her as the rest of his hand came to a rest between her butt cheeks.

“Oh god,” Gillian whimpered as he started to draw his middle finger around her anus with gentle pressure, spreading her wetness all over it. “David… fuck.”

“Yeah, you like that, huh?” he said softly, his eyes not leaving her face anymore. This was going to be so, so good.

“Ye-hes,” she whimpered and bucked into his face, inner muscles clenching around his digit.

His tongue sliced back and forth, up and down and in circles over her pulsing clit, lips sucking rough and relentless.

“Ahh,” Gillian cried out, and he knew her release was lingering so, so close now.

He pressed his finger a little firmly against her anus, and suddenly, she was grabbing a handful of his hair, twisting it between her fingers while she squeezed his other hand, her whole body jerking.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, Dave- fuuuck,” she screamed, and he couldn’t do anything about it but enjoy and watch in awe as she came... so fucking hard.

It lasted longer than ever before, and when she finally slumped back onto the mattress with an exhausted groan, he slowly removed his hand and kissed her inner thighs, staying with her while she was calming down.

“Oh my god, oh god,” she breathed after a while and put both of her hands over her face, letting her leg slide off his shoulder.

Gillian completely zoned out for a couple of moments, and when she finally opened her eyes again, he was lying beside her again, a lopsided grin on his beautiful, slick lips.

“David,” Gillian whispered and turned towards him. His arm came around her waist and pulled her close to his chest.

“That was incredible,” he said and stroked the small of her back, feeling goosebumps rising underneath his fingertips. She was still incredibly warm, and so soft.

“That was loud,” she corrected and looked at him sheepishly, her forehead bumping against his'.

“Yeah,” he nodded, gently thrusting his erection against the soft skin of her belly. “We better save that for our vacation next time, huh?” David whispered and captured her lips in a passionate kiss.

#relationship goals #gillovny #gillovny rpf #rpf #txf rpf #alternate universe #gillovny trash #moving forward #my writing

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cbspams · 3 years

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Kingdom: Legendary war - 100 second performances

TBH I dont wanna write full essays on these little intro performances even though I have a lot of thoughts, so they're all gonna be on this one post.

ATEEZ: I loved the introduction!! Dude the acting?? Seonghwa's full staggering?? Dope as fuck. The strings instrumental as well as the rough waves sound were a great introduction to the theme. A good performance overall, I think it genuinely highlighted and set up the kind of group ATEEZ is. I struggled a bit with the song choice because Wave (original) is so upbeat and free spirited while the kingdom version felt very aggressive. But I figured maybe they chose it because it's (1) their first music show win (important mentally and emotionally) and (2) it fits the pirate theme they're going to carry on in the show. Speaking of theme, I really liked that ATEEZ stuck to their guns and kept to the pirate theme. It's clearly a sort of icon for them, in Pirate King and Wave, and also in Wonderland (large pirate ship at the end) and THANXX (ships and sharks in the air, skull on the float). I do worry this will somehow limit their performances from now on but a continuous theme can be very powerful as well.

BTOB: Y'all I did not know anything about BTOB tbh. I've heard their songs here and there but I didn't know them at all and listening to this version of Beautiful Pain, I am stunned. Like I've always respected kpop idols as the ones who can do it all, especially in comparison to American celebrities who tend to be very one tracked in many ways, but BTOB really brings up a new level of skill in their singing. Eunkwang in particular really impressed me! He has really strong, stable vocals and is able to achieve those impactful long notes that I know for a fact is difficult to anyone who doesn't train with singing in mind in particular. He kind of reminds me of Hui from Pentagon and RTK? Technically it should be that Hui reminds me of him but like I got to know Hui first so yknow. I think the drawback for BTOB will be how they incorporate themes and action in their performances, as ballad songs tend to be very mellow in comparison to the kind of aggressive EDM/hip hop the other groups are known for.

SF9: I stan now. Just like, fact. I already really liked Summer Breeze and Good Guy from SF9 but I feel like their time on Kingdom has really suckered me into learning about them. But just from this introduction performance, I think it's really interesting what kind of strengths they were playing into. I know SF9 is pretty well known for their physique and appearances, as well as their individual acting ability. Like the mentioned during the episode, they do a lot of individual activities which I think would make a show like Kingdom really difficult for them because they don't have a lot of time to practice together as the other groups do. Still, I believe they can put on excellent performances if they play to their strengths and manage to show good team synergy. The intro performance is interesting because it was really intense, which was sort of off-set in some ways by their costuming and set design. I actually would have loved if they had taken more of a boss stance, like they're CEOs of the company or something with the matching lighting and LED screen displays. I feel like that would have really enhanced their suits and gelled hair. Still though!! Great job!! And please, huge shoutout to Taeyang who struggled with the body pack, I'm really impressed by his laser focus during the performance. I know it must be disappointing but he did well.

Stray Kids: My boys!! My babies!! I love how they carried the theme from the performance film that Minho stared in. Wolves is a wonderful concept for Kingdom for a variety of reasons. Wolves are a common standard in medieval representations (GOT as an example) so that's really symbolic of them participating in Kingdom. Additionally, I really like how it gives that kind of wild energy to SKZ, similar to how in Back Door they gave off really party-esque vibes. I also think of the aggression of wolves in defending their territory which is a cool intimidation tactic kinda? It's likely unintentional but it's still very cool. Choosing MIROH was kind of obvious, given it's importance as their very first win (like ATEEZ) and also the theme of the song being about freedom and being the king of the concrete jungle. The arrangement was so cool, seriously seriously Chan how do you do it?? Chan and Hui become friends please. I liked how they, like TBZ, used more of the stage than some of the other groups. Like Minho on the bleacher seats. Props wise, Changbin's firework was awesome although I don't necessarily know what kind of role it plays in the theme of the performance? But yeah, it was incredible and they totally deserved first place for that.

TBZ: Yooooo what was that start?? That posing?? Y'all please, my heart isn't strong enough for this. Eric's mf core strength to be able to sit up from that position-- hhhhh. I'm genuinely curious as to what theme they were thinking about when they made this because there's such a unique genre to the performance. It's daring, challenging, elegant and impactful. The whispering opening lines from Eric 100% made goosebumps creep up my arm. I also think it's interesting that they had a sort of rising from the ashes moment when all the members collapse and then come back up. This performance was an incredible showing of the full scope of TBZ's skills, as a group with incredible formations and dancing ability. I mean the hands in the camera? Really shows how their time on RTK has helped familiarize them to the stage available on Kingdom. That ballet bit with the classical piano?? (COOL LEDS AND TRANSITIONS TOO YO) Bro, how many other groups could do that so smoothly. It reminds me of the differences they had in RTK, like how Quasi una fantasia was a very modern dance-esque piece. I'm really hoping they continue to show their variety and creativity on Kingdom as they did in RTK and in this performance. Side note: GOT themed?? I'm gonna have to monitor that carefully because I'm not a GOT nut but my roommate is and I feel like if that's the theme then there should be some level of commitment to the concept, on a theatrical execution sense.

iKON: I've mentioned this before but this is possibly my favorite performance out of all of these for this intro round. I didn't really appreciate it at first but I keep going back to it because the arrangement is so interesting! The combination of their hip-hop original beat and the the aggression of the instrumentals (like the drumming beat and the flute) is so fun to listen to. I also like that they start off really strong and then really show off how fun they can be, like how Donghyuck (DK) and Jinhwan (Jay)'s duoing was really powerful and then post transition (which was also really clean!), Bobby had the time of his life just popping off the way he does. Bobby seems so carefree and that's amazing, I think that's so fun. I really like that iKON used their arms at the beginning too. Based on the other performance clips I've seen for rounds 1 and 2, that kind of movement seems to be their thing and that's awesome!! I gotta mention, Jinhwan is an incredible dancer. Even though iKON doesn't seem to have the same synchronization that TBZ, SKZ and ATEEZ have, it kind of really works in their favor because of the hip hop vibes they devote themselves too. Hip hop is all about individual expression so it's really fun to see their little quirks! That said, I do hope they're able to polish up a little bit so that it doesn't seem too out of sync, like when Donghyuck was a beat off in bit where they raise their arms together.

All in all, the intro performances really did stick to the charms each team has! That's really incredible and I really like that. Onto round 1!

lol i'm really out here always saying i dont wanna write full essays and then blowing up. anyways, if you haven't gotten the chance to check out the performances, I highly recommend watching them below!

ATEEZ - BTOB - SF9 - SKZ - TBZ - iKON

#admin talk #kingdom commentary #kingdom performance comments

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ohhhhmyblog · 7 years

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#StoryTimeWithMy - Me & #HurtBae handle things differently...clearly.

Ok... So I was with him over 3 years at this point. But in recent times, we had had multiple convos about not being together for various reasons...but there was still that lingering love. You know? Where you still speak everyday, still hang out, are still intimate, etc... Still...to the point where one week prior to this "incident" we did a little day trip where we took Teagan out to eat and to Liberty Science Center. You know, regular shit...

So on this day, I spoke with him a couple times throughout the day. I let him know I had made plans in his area later and we agreed to just hang out until my girl got off work. Soooo.... I go.

I get to his house and everything's regular... drinks, music, his friends, their girlfriends...typical weekend night at his place.

Then the bell rings, he goes to open it, and a woman comes in. I don't think anything of it at all...at first. Then I notice all of his friends get weirdly silent (completely out of character for this bunch). The woman is totally comfortable. She goes into the fridge for something, takes a charger out of the wall and heads toward his bedroom. She's out of sight for about a minute and I decide to go follow her.

And there she is...sitting on his bed, phone plugged in the wall, just scrolling through her phone...super comfortable. I do the only thing there is to do... "Oh hi...I'm MyAsia. Who are you? I'm *insert name i dont remember because it didn't matter*. Oh. You're here for *him*? How do you know him...because you clearly KNOW him? I've known him for years." She starts to look worried. She's catching on... (lol, funny now...wasn't funny then)

I go back into the living room. I approach him. I just stare at him. He gives me this look like "Fuck!" but tries to play like he's confused. "What?" he says., I just stare at him...

In that moment, I am trying soooooo hard not to burst into tears because...y'all...she was comfortable there. She wasn't new. She knew where the outlets were in his bedroom. She didn't require an introduction to his friends. She was comfortable enough to go in the fridge.

"Who is she? Why is she here?" He just stares at me with the goofiest "I have fucked up" face. She walks into the living room. It's now awkward af. I. LOSE. IT. I have so many questions and I'm asking them all...in front of everyone...at max volume...without one single fuck to give. Not. One.

His friends start to head to the door. The gf of one his boys stays behind and attempts to get me to relax. Nope. I'm on one. Then something in my head is like "MyAsia, you are making a fool of yourself. You are flipping your shit and he isn't even reacting." He is still in the same spot...looking dumb.

The woman gets her things to leave. I start to leave too. He follows. (I think he thought we would get into something...but no, my issue was never with her.) But in that moment, I interpreted that as him wanting to save her from me. I started swinging. You know when you swing as you talk? Why👊would👊you👊do👊this👊to👊me? Why👊have👊her👊come👊here👊when👊you👊knew👊I'd👊be👊here? He gives me this "I didnt know she was coming" bs...which only pissed me off even more. Now I know she's comfortable just popping up here? Ok.

I start bawling. I am sooo hurt. I felt betrayed. I felt stupid. I had placed him on this pedestal...because in my mind, he would never be "this guy". I attempt to storm out. He stops me. Now he has answers. Now he wants to explain. He wants to tell me that "we broke up already". He wants to tell me "we already decided not to be together". He wants me to believe she just came around in the last couple weeks...this woman who goes in his fridge, knows his friends, comes over unannounced and knows where the outlets are in his bedroom... I. Can. Not. Stop. Crying. I want to...because I feel weak and stupid...but I can't.

I snatch away from him and leave. I can't leave. I have an excruciating headache suddenly. I can't see thru the tears. I was a wreck...smh. I get in the car, drive one block up and park. I call the friend I was suppose to link up with after she got off. I am hysterical. She can't understand me. My phone beeps. There's another call coming in. It's his friend's gf from back at the house. She wants to know where I am. I tell her and click back over. I give a short, prob super inaccurate version of what just happened. At this point, he is Satan to me...so I can only imagine what I said.

Anyway, I tell her where I am and hang up. I am legit hysterical. My head is hurting. I am angry. I am hurt. This woman wasn't new. This woman was comfortable y'all. When he reacted to this whole "incident", he considered her. I saw it. It was too much. I sat in my car just shaking...trying to talk myself out of setting his house on fire. Seriously... The ONLY thing that stopped me was knowing that children lived in the unit above him...the children who stomp around and make so much more on those weekend mornings when he and I just wanted to sleep in. Those loud ass children kept me from making a super irrational decision that night.

I'm startled by a knock on my window. It's his friend's gf. She tells me to unlock the door. She gets in the passenger seat and just sits there, silently. I'm still crying. I can't make it stop. My head is racing. Then the other friend shows up. She gets in the car. We just sit there for a minute. Then my friend who missed the whole thing says "what the hell happened?"... I tell her...and finish with "My head hurts. My stomach hurts. I need a drink."

We all get in her car andride around North Newark looking for a bar. It's dark. It's late. Everything is closed. Then we see this little corner bar that seems to be open. We get out. We go in. There are all Hispanic men over 50 in this bar, y'all. I didn't care. They had liquor...lol I had shots and cocktails with these 2 til the bar was closed. I spilled my little heart out in there...to 2 women who weren't even THAT close to me...but in that moment I appreciated them. They let me vent and talked me down...well kinda... ...Because now, I'm angry AND upset AND still feeling stupid...and I've spent the last hour drinking continuously...

I decide I am going back to his house. They try to talk me out of it...but nah, I'm going back. I call his phone. He answers immediately. I tell him I'm coming back and he needs to be there and alone. I promise you in my head I was going back to that house to hurt him. I considered killing him...in real life. I thought of how I'd do it, how I could get away with it, how it'd make his mom and sister feel, how I'd explain it to Teagan...all that. SMH

We leave the bar and head back to his house. They wont let me go in alone. I ring the bell. He comes to the door. In that moment...something happened to me that I cant and wont ever be able to explain. In that moment, I needed him. So many times before I he had been the ONLY person to see me through bs and tough times. This time was no different. In that moment, I was searching for and anticipating comfort and consolation...from the very person who had just hurt me. SMH Why was I like that?!

I start yelling, crying and carrying on...and he tries to hold me. I'm fighting him...I want him not to touch me and I want him to hold me tighter...at the same... damn...time. Y'all... I was all messed up.

We go inside and he's giving me the same story and I'm so over hearing it. I zone out and I'm just wondering why I'm back at his house...seeking solace in the same man who had upset me in the first place. I got angry. I was back and forth between literally throwing blows and falling into his chest crying asking him why. The whole time my head is KILLING me.

Suddenly it's silent. For a while there's just me doing that "I just finished crying", sniffling thing lol Then he takes my jacket off of me, lays me down in his bed, takes my shoes off and just cuddles up next to me. He says he's sorry and that he never meant to hurt me like this and this isn't how he ever thought this would go. I fell asleep...in the arms of the same mf who I had just thrown jabs at...the same mf I seriously considered killing just hours before. I woke up the next morning and left silently.

I was violently ill for days. I learned then just how real "mind over matter" is. I had literally gotten physically SICK...because of mental and emotional pain. I also learned that you can not ever view someone the same after heartbreak. I learned that anyone is capable of anything and pedestals are for trophies, not people. I learned that everyone is just moments of hurt & anger away from a Snapped episode so I don't judge.

Fast forward to present time...fast forward pass months of personal growth and experience...fast forward pass a bunch of laughs and tough convos between us over the years... This guy is still one of the closest ppl to me. I still love him to death. I currently consider him a friend of mine. I just know I can't ever look at him THAT way again...and that's ok.

That #HurtBae video struck a nerve with me. No one is above being hurt. But when you're in a situation that is emotionally and mentally draining, get the hell out of it!

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ecotone99 · 4 years

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Bipolar Disorder Wears Many Faces, and So Do I [MF]

I have Bipolar 1. There, I said it. It’s not something I usually talk about very much. I’m private about it because it’s something I really struggle with, and sometimes, I’m even embarrassed about it. Especially the times that I’m manic. But I’m not always manic- in fact, Bipolar has many different faces. For those of you who don’t know, there are three basic states you can be in when you have Bipolar 1: depressed, stable, or manic. Technically you can be hypomanic, too, which is a state of near-mania that is usually characterized by Bipolar 2, but the condition wears the same face as mania. Two of the states- mania and depression- are bad for different reasons. With mania comes irresponsible, life-changing decisions and high impulsivity. Mania is toxic to the brain and can cause someone to ruin their own life, but while you’re manic, you feel like you’re on top of the world. Depression brings with it suicidal ideations, feelings of hopelessness, and a deep despair that eats into the soul.

It was the end of April. I had had a rough go of it recently due to my manic episode in September and my subsequent depression in the following months. I had been absolutely crippled by this depression largely because of my mania. I had done so many things I was ashamed of, made so many decisions I regretted, but at the time I had been so happy and carefree. The months after that were spent picking up the pieces of the destruction I had left in my wake.

Now, though, it was almost summer. My summer classes would begin soon and I had work at the funeral home to keep me busy. I had more structure in my life, and things finally started to feel…better. I had recently moved, partly to get away from the ruin I’d left behind, partly for mortuary school. But mostly to get away. I was in a new place, on my own (except for my faithful pug), with a new career path and no friends or family in the area. I felt conflicted because part of me was lonely and nervous- this was the most “adult” I’d ever had to be- but the rest of me was so excited to begin a new life. This, coupled with a new therapist who finally got me on the right medication, helped me level out. I was actually able to experience joy again, this time without being destructive. I could finally put on my Stable Face.

I probably should have mentioned this, but when I said that Bipolar has many faces, I meant that literally. At least, in my case. I have three faces I can wear, but they will only look natural if my mood matches the face. For example, if I’m depressed and I try to wear my Stable Face, the flesh will be askew and the skin won’t line up like an ordinary human face. Think of the cockroach alien flesh suit from ‘Men in Black.’ Yeah, not so pretty. But you know what? Bipolar isn’t pretty either.

When I’m not using them, I keep my faces in a jar by the door. The little window lets in the perfect amount of sunlight for my faces to get their proper amount of vitamin D without having to actually set them outside. I’m sure the neighbors wouldn’t be pleased about that anyway. My Depressive and Manic Faces floated flaccidly in a mixture of formaldehyde and other preservatives that I managed to sneak home from work. Every year, I would change out the mixture and clean the jar.

Tongs in hand, I dangled my Stable Face over the kitchen sink and began to rinse off the chemicals. I made sure to scrub inside and out, especially around the holes for my eyes and inside the nose, because formaldehyde always makes my eyes and nostrils burn. Then, I gently patted it dry with a clean towel and ran my fingers across the loose skin. The brow was not furrowed like the Depressive Face I’d been wearing for so long, and the eye holes weren’t wide and wild like my Manic Face. No, this face was relaxed and at peace. It also wore the slightest hint of a smile, its lips turned up at the edges.

I brushed my hair back up into a bun and began to apply my Stable Face. For the first time in forever, it fit perfectly. I gently pasted down the edges to cover the exposed flesh and muscle tissue beneath the skin, then I looked in the mirror and flashed myself a smile. It actually looked genuine, and I could practically feel the endorphins rushing through my body. I added a little makeup, and voila! The perfect face. I looked at my reflection and felt confident and beautiful.

I was still admiring myself when I heard a noise. I was in the bathroom, so I didn’t hear the initial click of the jimmied lock, but I did hear the slight creak of the un-oiled hinge on my front door. My ears pricked up, and I heard my pug begin to growl from the entryway. Suddenly, she yelped and bolted into the bathroom with me. I scooped her up and closed the bathroom door with my back against it, heart beginning to race. Someone was in my apartment. I held my breath and tried to keep my dog as quiet as possible. The intruder was rifling through my things, looking for valuables. I cursed myself as I remembered that I’d left my purse right out in the open.

After a few minutes passed that seemed more like hours, I finally heard the door shut. I expelled my breath in a heaving sigh and placed my dog back on the ground. She had stopped whining, so that probably meant she couldn’t smell the intruder in the apartment anymore. I peeked around the edge of the bathroom door and into the front room. There was no one. I relaxed a little, stepping out of the bathroom and into the front room to check my purse.

Oddly enough, nothing had been stolen out of my wallet. The whole purse was untouched. I furrowed my brow and then had to reposition my forehead to undo it. I went to the front door and, sure enough, the lock had been picked. Shaking my head, I looked down at the small table to my right. On top of it sat my bowl of keys, and on the shelf beneath sat my jar of faces.

I mean…face. There was only one. Panicking, I picked up the glass jar and examined it from all sides. Still, there remained only one. My Depressive Face. Someone-the intruder- had stolen my Manic Face, the most dangerous of all my faces. With that face, some serious, serious damage can be done. Now, I’d never had anyone steal my faces before, so I wasn’t sure how this would all play out. Would my face fit on someone else? What would happen if they weren’t manic? How the hell was I going to get it back?

I thought hard about who could have possibly wanted to do this to me? The only people in the world that knew about my faces were me and my parents. I racked my brain for any enemies I might have made recently, thinking that maybe someone had come for revenge and instead found something so bizarre they had to take it. But they didn’t take both- just the one. Why? And how did they find out? I was on the verge of frustrated tears.

I’d had no visitors for weeks, maybe even months because of the depression I had just gotten out of. And I worried that with the extra fear I was now carrying I might need to slip my Depressive Face back on. I went to the mirror and adjusted my skin. It looked okay. Not perfect, but good enough to pass as a normal woman. I thought about calling the police about the break-in, but what would I tell them about what the intruder stole? I imagined a cop showing up at my house, leaning back with his hands in his pockets and examining my door.

“Yup, that lock’s been picked alright. Ain’t much we can do about it since they didn’t steal anything, just get your locks changed,” said the imaginary policeman. I huffed and called a locksmith, then I took my pug and left the apartment to go to the park. I just needed to get out of there for a bit, every second I was in there I felt like I was being watched. I made sure I hid my extra face. Once we were at the park, I read and my dog played, and for a moment, everything was forgotten.

That changed when I got back home. It was late in the evening by that time, and I was exhausted from the sun exposure and emotional trauma of the day. I’d just bid the locksmith goodbye as he finished up. I didn’t feel like cooking, so I ordered a pie from Papa’s Pizza for takeout rather than delivery. I’d gotten delivery from there the whole time I was depressed, and I was ready to get off my ass and out of the house, even if I wasn’t fully up to cooking my own food yet. What better way to relax than eating comfort food?

I kissed my dog on her forehead the way I always do before I leave the house, even if it’s just for a short while. I triple-checked that the new lock was secured before leaving to pick up my food. Then, I hopped in my car and put on some Zeppelin. I lost myself in the music and drove to the restaurant under a cloudy, darkening sky. When I arrived, I sat in the parking lot so that the song I was listening to could finish, then I got out and slammed the door behind me. My feet crunched on the gravel as I swung open the glass door and entered the establishment. I strolled up to the bored-looking middle-aged man at the register and gave him my name. He looked up at me.

“So you’re the special customer Katy was talking about. She loved your tips, man. Shame she was fired,” he said, and reached around to grab my pizza. Gears turned in my head.

“Fifteen, even.” Katy. Katy…that was the name that always popped up on my delivery app. She was the girl who had been consistently delivering me pizzas for months now- the only person that could have peeked inside my apartment and seen my faces. It had to be her.

“Wait, why was she fired?” I asked slowly, reaching into my purse to fish for my wallet. He shrugged.

“Started acting fuckin’ crazy. Kept saying her face was falling off, or something.” I bit my lip and nodded, trying to keep a straight face, no pun intended. I handed him the cash.

“Right, right. Did she say where she was going, by any chance?” He shrugged again.

“Just home, I guess. Said she didn’t need a job anymore anyway because she just became a millionaire.” I sighed. Classic mania. It all hit too close to home.

“Alright,” I said as he gave me change for the twenty, “Where is ‘home,’ then?” The man snorted.

“How should I know? I don’t look at employee records.”

“Well, could you show them to me?” He rolled his eyes.

“Ma’am…” he started.

“I’m gonna stop you right there. First of all, I am way too young to be a ‘ma’am.’ Second, you’re gonna show me that record,” I said, acting more confident than I actually felt. This time, he actually laughed. It was more like a hee-haw.

“Or what?” I hesitated for a second, then I had an idea. Tearing at the delicate glue that I’d used to paste my face to my head, I ripped off my Stable Face and showed him the raw, pulsating, muscular, exposed, gruesome tissues beneath. Immediately, a wet spot started to form in his jeans.

“Rah!” I screamed at him, lunging forward menacingly. Then, he passed out. I admit I had to stifle a giggle as I rearranged my face to the best of my ability. I’d never shown that to anyone except my parents.

Focus, I told myself. I walked behind the counter and wandered into the back of the store. The office was the first door on my right down the hallway that led from the kitchen. I approached the file cabinet and opened the top drawer. ‘Financial Statements,’ it read. I closed it. In the second drawer, I found what I was looking for. ‘Employee Records.’ I found Katy’s resume in the ‘Shred’ folder. Her address was listed right at the top. Perfect, now I knew where I needed to go.

I left the pizza parlor after repositioning the unconscious man so that he wouldn’t wake up with a kink in his neck. Then, I took my pizza and headed straight to Katy’s, eating in the car along the way. When I got there, there was only one car in the driveway. I hoped she lived alone.

I knocked on the door, softly at first, but then louder after there was no answer to the first knock. A light flicked on in the doorway and I heard footsteps approach. Slowly, the door opened, but only just a crack.

“What is it? What do you want?” said a gruff female voice.

“Katy? It’s me, Isabelle, your best customer. I think you have something of mine?” I heard her gasp on the other side of the door. She paused to consider her next move, then sighed and opened the door fully. It was me. I mean, she was me. It was like looking in a mirror, except the body was different. She had my face, and it was a face I was oh, so familiar with. Wild-eyed and not quite lucid, but damn, it fit her perfectly.

“You can come in. Sit over there on that old couch, I’m tossing it tomorrow and buying all new furniture for this place.” I didn’t sit.

“Katy, I know you must have a lot going on, but I need my face back,” I said patiently.

“Well yeah, this is the busiest I’ve ever been in my life, so I’ll make this quick. Look, it’s not like I wanted to steal your face. I actually never even noticed the jar on your shelf until my own face started to peel off one day. And then I robbed you, and everything changed! Oh, my life is just perfect now! I’m gonna sell the house and buy a big van, you know? Like, the old-fashioned Volkswagen buses? And I’m gonna travel across the country and live off of the land. I’ll be blogging and taking photos the whole time if you want to follow my adventures- after all, it will be your face that makes me famous. Tell you what, we can even split the profits!” She spoke with such genuine zeal and excitement, I couldn’t bear to be the one to tell her that she was just delusional, that it didn’t make sense to buy new furniture for a house she that was planning to sell, that her life didn’t change at all- she did. And now she was about to destroy herself without help.

“Katy, listen to me,” I said, formulating a plan in my mind, “I’m gonna make you a promise, okay? If you give me back my face, your life is going to get so much better. And I can take you to a place full of people who will recognize all of your faces, and just how beautiful each of them are. But they have to be your own.” She blinked at me, skeptical. I continued.

“Look, bring me your face, the one that fell off.” She shrugged and went to fetch it. When she brought it out and I looked at it, I felt a pang of sympathy. She was so beautiful, yet she couldn’t accept herself. Her flesh had rejected itself. I gently took the face in my hands. It had only been a day, so the fact that she hadn’t preserved it in formaldehyde wasn’t that big of a deal. I would have to tell her about that trick, though.

“Now, can you do something for me? It’s not going to be easy, but I need you to trust me, because I’ve stood in your shoes before. I need you to give me back my face, and then you need to face yourself. We’re going to patch you up as best as we can, and then we’re going to go on the most important adventure of your life.” Katy nodded and bit her- my- lip. We went into the bathroom together and I helped her by getting my long fingernails under the edge of the skin to peel off the rest of the face. Once it was off, I sighed with relief, then I folded it up and slipped it into my purse.

“Okay. This isn’t going to be perfect, but we’re gonna do our best,” I said. After a half hour of glue and two hours of makeup, she looked reasonable enough to pass as a slightly-deformed woman. By the time I got her to the hospital, I knew that she would be in capable hands and that her face would readjust alongside with her medications over time. The medical staff would probably be baffled. I think she realized what was happening on the car ride over, but she didn’t try to fight me. Deep down, she knew that something was wrong and that she needed all the help she could get. I let her eat the rest of my cold pizza.

Once they were ready to take her back, we exchanged a hug and waved goodbye. I slipped her a small piece of paper with my phone number on it.

“Sometimes it gets lonely in there, so… Just call anytime.” She smiled genuinely at me as a tear rolled down her own cheek.

“Thanks, Isabelle. Things are going to change again, aren’t they?” Her voice cracked.

“Yeah, they’re gonna change. But remember when I said that this is the most important adventure of your life. It might be grueling, and sometimes you might even hate it. But it’s a path you’ve gotta take.” Katy nodded.

“The most important adventure of my life,” she echoed thoughtfully. I gave her hand one last squeeze before they took her away. I knew we would keep in touch.

It’s been a year since Katy stole my face, but in that time, she’s managed to build faces of her own, and I’m proud to say that she’s been wearing her Stable Face consistently for 9 months now. I’ve still got mine on, too. We’ve still got a long way to go, but now, we get to be our best selves, and we’re doing it together. I can’t wait to see what face she’ll be wearing when I pull out the engagement ring tonight.

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