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concussed-to-pieces · 3 years

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The Mettle Of A Man; Part Seventeen

Fandom: Fallout (4)

Pairing: Eventual Paladin Danse/Female Sole Survivor

Rating: Holy shit M.

AN: Tagging @anonymouscosmos, @culturalrebel, @mercy-and-malice, @deepkittycollecto and @nelba! Enjoy!

Part One: ArcJet

Part Two: The Prydwen

Part Three: Orders

Part Four: Finding Brandis

Part Five: Weston Water And Oberland

Part Six: Meeting Preston And Matthew

Part Seven: Radstag And Radstorm

Part Eight: The Return To Sanctuary Hills

Part Nine: Domestic Ruminations

Part Ten: Institutionalized

Part Eleven: Two Weeks, Three Days

Part Twelve: Haylen’s Warning And The Glowing Sea

Part Thirteen: Under Fire

Part Fourteen: Dichotomy

Part Fifteen: The Litany Trial

Part Sixteen: Nice Try

[!TRIGGER WARNING!: This installment contains intense recounts of previous abuse, intense depictions of self-loathing, self-deprecation and brief mentions of depression. Stay safe!]

Cade caught Danse before he could depart after the rest of their unofficial 'war council' had been dismissed, the medical officer inquiring, "How are you coping, Paladin? I hope that your adjustment to your newfound knowledge is going well." The arch of his eyebrow indicated plainly that Cade was looking for a clear answer, possibly to dissuade his own concerns.

"I am still uncertain, Knight-Captain Cade." Danse stated bluntly. "I know that Quinlan's reports are accurate. I know that I must be a synth. But it is...it's difficult to wrap my head around it."

"My door is always open, Danse. As it's been since the day you were assigned to the Prydwen." Cade reminded him. "I can't say I've ever had the pleasure of doing a mental evaluation on a synth, but…" he trailed off thoughtfully. "Hmm, that's not quite right. You and I have had sessions before. Maybe synths aren't so different in their cognition. Perhaps this is a nature versus nurture scenario."

"Perhaps." Danse allowed, but he knew that he sounded less than optimistic.

"Maybe in a day or two, once everything has calmed down and you've had time to think?" Cade suggested. "Collect your thoughts, then come see me and we can discuss your current state and the repercussions of Maxson's treatment."

The paladin nodded, relieved that Cade didn't wish to immediately evaluate him. It had been an incredibly stressful and arduous several weeks. More than anything, the paladin was longing to finally get some sleep.

After he spoke to Haylen and Rhys, of course. They deserved his gratitude, if only for their combined efforts in delivering the tip-off that had literally saved his life. To say nothing of their care for Elizabeth in his absence, even though they were unable to free her. They had kept her alive, and that was more than the paladin had dared to hope for.

Danse watched Cade depart, his mind miles away now. Backhand would be incredibly busy in the lead up to the assault. He felt almost irritated by that; it was unfair to ask so much of her so soon after what had transpired. But the luxury of time was no longer on their side. Danse understood, in a practical sense, that they needed to strike as fast as possible. It was entirely within reason that the Institute already knew of their plans and were preparing their own countermeasures.

It still didn't erase the hollow sensation in his gut, the fear that Backhand was all too willing to stretch herself paper-thin for her various factions. He promised himself then and there that he would do his best to absorb some of the burden.

As much as she would allow.

The memory of her ripping her knuckles apart on the manual release of his armor, talking to Matthew's parents, taking her helmet off and smiling at him. Thank you, Danse or I thought you were dead or please don't do that to me again --

Danse chewed anxiously on his lower lip. As much as she would allow. As much as he could feasibly handle. It should have felt odd that he was trading one leader for another, but Danse could only rationalize that it must be another portion of his programming.

"Paladin Danse, sir?"

Rhys . Danse started, turning around. He hadn't even heard the knight approach down the catwalk. Hell, he hadn't even realized he was spacing out in the hallway. "Yes, Knight?" He replied, nodding out of habit to acknowledge Haylen beside Rhys.

"Elder Brandis said you wanted to see us, sir." The knight stated, sounding a bit hesitant. "He said we needed to discuss...certain things."

Of course he did . Danse sighed heavily, bracing himself for some level of a disappointment-fueled tirade.

"Danse, I'm so sorry." Haylen blurted out, her voice shaking. Danse was startled, tilting his head while she carried on, "I wish there had been some other way for me to tell you. You must have been terrified ."

"I was certainly confused, if nothing else." The paladin admitted with a wry smile. "I am immensely grateful to both of you, regardless of my own trials. You followed your training and stuck to your guns, and I couldn't be more proud." He deflated slightly. "Even if the pride of a synth means precious little."

"The synth shit doesn't matter to either of us, sir." Rhys muttered. "We don't care. We're just glad you're back and that Maxson didn't manage to kill you. That's the important part, right?"

"In a way." Danse agreed, grimacing. "Our battle is far from over, however."

"Hey, we're doing something. That's more than a lot of people can say." Haylen reasoned, ever the optimist. "I've got faith in whatever plan you guys come up with."

"Thank you for believing in me." The paladin murmured, giving the only surviving members of Squad Gladius a stiff salute.

"We know you, sir. You protected us, trained us. Built us up from basically nothing." Rhys sounded angry, his typically-sullen expression gone even more sour. "You think we could ever turn our backs on you? You're not that stupid."

Haylen began to protest, "Rhys-"

"Haylen, you and I both know he'll just self-deprecate until he dissolves. I'm not letting that happen." Rhys grumbled at the scribe, who fell silent at his reasoning. Her eyes were narrowed to slits and the sight was immensely entertaining to Danse, who couldn't keep a nervous chuckle from bubbling up in his throat.

"I'm certain the two of you are aware of the devastating depression you dragged me out of all those years ago in the Capital Wasteland." Danse clapped Rhys on the shoulder and caught Haylen up in a rare one-armed hug. "How many times will you two save me? Should I start taking you for granted?"

"Paladin Danse, sir, w-we…" Haylen trailed off, her lower lip quivering. She buried her face in Danse's ribs and Rhys grunted.

"Haylen, c'mon . Pull it together." He huffed, his own eyes looking suspiciously wet. "Listen, sir, I think I've made our position pretty clear. We follow your orders. Learning about that shit with Maxson-"

"I'm so angry! " Haylen interrupted him, glaring upwards. "God Danse, I'm furious . What he did to you is unforgivable, inexcusable." She announced hotly. "Everyone assumed something was going on, but we also assumed it was consensual ."

" 'Everyone' ?" Danse echoed, a weird surge of retroactive embarrassment seizing his body. "I suppose I should be thankful you all were so willing to offer me the illusion of privacy." He mumbled.

"He's never coming anywhere near you again, sir." Rhys stated, his jaw set in an angry scowl. "I don't care if he's the last of the Maxson line. I'll break his fucking skull."

His words stirred Danse's guilt to life, the ugly feeling rearing its head once more. "It is a difficult situation to be in. I do not envy our elders, past or present." Danse tried to pose the sentence with a modicum of compassion, though he was unsure of the attempt's success. The paladin knew that despite Maxson's position of power, Danse bore a majority of the blame for not standing up to the elder until it was too late to prevent his spiral.

"Difficult, my ass ." Rhys growled under his breath.

…

"So we've got Preston, someone by the name of John D., the…" Ingram narrowed her eyes at the readout. " Atom Cats ?"

"Yep. Real into their power armor. And Zeke owes me a favor." Backhand explained, continuing to scroll through her Pip Boy notes. "If I can get them to walk across the pond and cover the Castle, that will free up more Minutemen to join us."

"Should I ask how you managed to ingratiate yourself with so many of these people?"

"I'm a sucker for a lost cause." Vega answered, her tone dry.

Ingram snorted, shaking her head. "Lucky for us, I imagine. Also lucky for us that you're the forgiving sort."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Proctor." Backhand retorted. "I'm just not yet in a position to combat your aerial superiority."

"Whew, gonna' file that one away for later consideration."

A soft knock on the comm doorway interrupted the two women, and Vega turned to see Danse peering cautiously into the room. "Paladin! You're just in time, we were about to start rallying the troops. Want to lend a hand?"

"What needs to be done, General Vega?" The paladin asked, his posture gone stiff and proper.

Backhand could feel her smile dim slightly, but she reined herself in. They had all been through so much, she reasoned, and old habits were usually a comfort. "Well, I've got a few calls to make on my own, but if you can get in touch with Lieutenant Garvey that would be a huge help."

"Understood."

Proctor Ingram (who had been watching their exchange with poorly-veiled interest) stepped out of the way so that Danse could settle down at the desk alongside one of their many radio switchboards. "Vega, I think the two of you can handle this." The older woman remarked, giving Elizabeth a sly wink behind Danse's back. "I'll start whipping the base camp into shape. Make myself useful, y'know. Ad Victoriam."

Vega went bright red as Ingram saluted, the proctor sporting an absolutely infuriating smirk. "B-But Proctor--"

"No buts! You guys handle the easy stuff. I'll manage the elbow grease." Ingram then mouthed talk to him! , before strolling out of the comm area. Backhand swore under her breath, thumping her fist into the desk in mute frustration.

"I can leave, General Vega." Danse offered, making her start and whirl to face him.

"No no! No, uh, you're fine. You're not the problem here." Vega assured him, waving her hands nervously. "I'm just...I'm a little uptight, that's all."

"Will your forces refuse to join us?" The paladin asked, his rigid posture easing slightly as he tipped his head back to look up at her. He continued in an undertone, "Would it be simpler to do it with your troops alone? Do you truly need the Brotherhood?"

"We do need the Brotherhood, yes. But I don't think we'll need them for the fighting. We'll need them for the mass casualty options and the refugee care after the fact." Backhand began to pace, mostly so she didn't have to maintain eye contact. The paladin looked fatigued yet determined, and it pained her to know that rest was still so far away for them. Rest and the possibility of actually speaking with him about the thing that had been on her mind in one form or another since…

Well, it had been a long time.

"We'll need help rebuilding more than anything. Not a lot of settlements will be keen to take on synths, so I'll need to figure out some kind of alternative. I really need to talk with Nick and Dea--er, John D ., and get their input on this whole engagement." Backhand rubbed her temples. "And here I thought getting in would be the hard part!" She tried to joke.

After a moment of silence, Vega heard Danse clear his throat. "General... Elizabeth , I know you already have many responsibilities, all of them miles more important than my own struggles."

Backhand looked over at him expectantly, a little confused.

"I have to give Cade a full report." The tall man said abruptly. "I...he wants to know everything that's transpired." He stared down at the floor, the heel of his boot scuffing the grating beneath them as he rushed to add, "I know it's selfish of me to ask you to--I mean, you've been through so much, b-but I was...rather, I am uncertain of this endeavor, and my ability to maintain my composure during it. You tend to have a mollifying effect on me for some reason."

"You want me to be present when you give your medical officer the full rundown?" Vega raised an eyebrow, further confused. Danse was a soldier , surely he had endured a full physical before?

"I am overly anxious. It means reliving some portions of my past that I find...traumatic."

"Oh." Oh . Backhand felt stupid as the truth dawned on her. Everything that's transpired . Of course Danse would want someone he trusted with him, this wasn't a physical exam at all. "What about Haylen or Rhys? Are they more appraised of the situation?"

Danse was shaking his head before she had even finished. "I did my best to keep everything that happened quiet, though it appears that I was unsuccessful. I was told that was my only option, and I did not wish to disobey Maxson's orders."

"That fuckin' asshole." Vega growled. "Alright, if you're sure it's me you want with you, I'm here."

"You don't have t--er, that is, I regret taking up more of your valuable time, General Vega. I promise after this meeting with Cade, I will be fully at your disposal." He assured her, seemingly pained by his current state.

"Danse, I don't care about that. I don't want you better just so you can get used up again, I want you better for you . I'm sorry that all of this robs you of the proper time to regroup, y'know?" Backhand apologized, her words deliberately quiet as she boldly laced her fingers through his own. "Once we're done here, though, you need to take some time off. General's orders."

"I would have to speak with Elder Brandis on the matter. As his most senior paladin, I am unsure if he would be able to permit me that luxury." Danse replied unhappily, giving her hand a gentle squeeze before he released it. "' A run ashore ', always just out of reach."

"I'm getting you time off, even if I have to kidnap you myself."

The paladin's chuckle in reply to her threat was subdued, but it still sent a frisson of happiness through her body. Backhand choked down the guilt of having those feelings in the first place for just a second, choosing to bask in the warm sensation.

"When you're ready, General, I'll need the proper frequencies to speak with the Castle." Danse's request brought her crashing back down to earth, and Vega rushed to oblige him.

There's always something else to do .

…

Two days later, on the cusp of their attack on the Institute, the both of them were seated in Knight-Captain Cade's main office aboard the Prydwen. The older officer sat across from them in the cramped space, a clipboard propped up on his knee.

"The only questions I'll ask will be strictly for clarity's sake." The knight-captain informed Danse quietly. "If you don't want to answer, that is entirely acceptable and within your right, but the more information we have, the better."

Danse nodded, the motion stilted. "I understand, Knight-Captain. I'll do my best to cooperate."

Vega squeezed his hand. God knew she didn't like this one damn bit, but she was going to stick it out for him. After all, he had gone to bat for her against the elder . Loyalty like that was in short supply. "I'm right here with you, Danse." She said softly. He had gone pasty white beneath his usual windblown complexion, and he gripped her hand wordlessly.

"If you could start at the beginning, Paladin. Or as close to it as possible." Cade prompted him.

"Yes, I...of course." Danse rasped. "The first time we engaged was shortly before the Brotherhood lost Knight Cutler."

Cade looked at him over his half-moon glasses, seeming perturbed. "That was...so this was a prolonged assault."

"Not an assault. I did as I was ordered." The dull tone of Danse's voice, the way his eyes had gone almost grey ...Vega wanted to know how the hell Maxson had ever justified this. "I could not bring myself to question Arthur. He came to me, at first simply asking for help even though it was an order. He said he couldn't sleep. I...I never told Cutler. I didn't think it was relevant. I thought I was helping the new elder." Danse looked up at Cade. "I know what it's like to not be able to sleep for all the thoughts in your head."

"Was there a specific point in time where his behavior shifted? Perhaps when it became more clear to you that there was something wrong?" Backhand was grateful for the delicate way Cade phrased the question.

"I…" Danse's brow furrowed. "...had just come back with...after what transpired with Cutler. Four days on base. I was furious with Maxson for stationing Cutler out there, furious with myself for not saving Cutler. I was grieving and hurt both physically and emotionally, as you recall." Cade inclined his head. "I assume you also recall the bite on my arm that appeared shortly thereafter. That was a...result of my inability to perform."

"Ah." Cade murmured, jotting something down.

Bite? Vega could feel Danse trembling. "I-I was...unable to function or perform for him in a satisfactory manner and that was his method of voicing his frustration with me." Danse swallowed hard. "I was mourning , Cade." He sounded like he was begging the other man to understand, begging him not to judge.

Perform for him. Backhand sucked in a deep breath through her nose, willing herself to stay silent.

"After that, I would just comply. It was never as bad as that time. I would perform for him to the best of my abilities." Danse paused, "but I never sought him out, and nothing occurred without me being ordered to do so." He then proceeded to rattle off a distressingly-long list of dates, every time that Maxson had coerced him. "I was not interested in...well, anyone , after Cutler." He muttered after a brief pause, "the term broken seems fitting."

"You weren't allowed proper space to heal yourself after what happened with Cutler. You were injured and then forced to deal with someone who kept prying open your wounds because they enjoyed lording their power over you." Cade theorized, his voice a little sharper. " Broken is not fitting in the slightest, Danse."

The paladin shrugged. "Whatever the terminology might be, then."

" Traumatized , Danse. Emotional wounds take time to heal, just like physical ones. Losing Cutler in the way that we did-"

"I deserved it!" Danse cut off the medical officer, leaning forward and clenching his free hand on his knee. "I failed Cutler, Cade! I should have gone after him sooner! The treatment from Maxson is what I deserved ." His eyes were wild, frantic. "He's an abuser, but I am a man deserving of every last instance of that abuse for my inaction when it came to Cutler!" The paladin reasoned intensely.

Cade sighed, rifling through his clipboard. "Danse, you did not deserve or garner punishment for the consequences of Maxson's orders." He informed the other man quietly. "You were simply a man who lost someone that he cared deeply about."

"And to find out that I'm not even that much!" Danse spat. "I'm still trying to cope with the reality that I am a living lie . My identity as Paladin Danse is nothing but a memory now. Everything I held dear, everything I ever believed in is completely gone. Can you imagine how that feels?" Danse was nearly shouting at this point, moving to stand. "I started out as nothing , and I've ended up as nothing . And I don't know what the hell to do about it!"

Backhand brought her hand up over his elbow, hauling him back down into his seat. " Listen to Cade, Danse." She growled. The paladin fought her grip briefly, but ultimately slumped in the chair. Good thing too, Vega wasn't exactly up to full strength just yet. The large man was shaking again, his breathing coming in harsh bursts. "It's okay, it's okay." Vega found herself repeating the phrase, rubbing circles on his back between his shoulder blades. Many members of military factions found repetition comforting and Danse appeared to be no exception, the large man heaving a massive sigh under the weight of her hand.

"Danse, I'll fully admit to being out of my element here. I never expected to have to treat a synth." Knight-Captain Cade said plainly. "However, I've known you for many years. We have an established rapport. Your body is indistinguishable from an ordinary human body, as proved by my records. Your mental processes and pain responses are normal for a human. I suppose what I'm trying to say is learning that you are a synth may not change all that much, despite what you may be feeling."

Danse choked out a forlorn noise that might have been a sob, burying his face in his hands. "I'm so confused." He confessed plaintively. "You're saying I did not deserve punishment for my failings, but...how else am I supposed to atone for Cutler?" He looked up, tears welling up in his eyes. "How am I supposed to reconcile with these human emotions, Cade? I barely kept myself under control when I believed I was human!"

"Your feelings have always run deep, Danse. Your empathy for your fellow man has landed you in hot water more than once." Cade gestured at Vega. "According to our infiltrator, even the most brutal of synths feel regret and remorse just like we do, though they have not been taught how to cope with it."

"I still feel like a human. Nothing feels different, yet now I constantly second-guess everything I do. I've had a plan from the beginning to shape my future, but I have to wonder about whether that's a lie as well." Danse remarked bitterly. "I had...I had hoped…" he trailed off, shaking his head. "It doesn't matter."

Backhand could feel her heart breaking the longer he spoke. His true identity was an immense blow to him, and on top of it he was still struggling under the burden of the guilt he carried due to Cutler's demise. He blamed himself for Arthur's demands.

"Listen to Cade, Danse." She urged. Her hand was essentially on autopilot as she traced small patterns on the center of his back, moving up and down his spine without rhyme or reason. "You're not to blame for what Maxson did. It's not yours to bear. Trust me, coming from someone who's more than willing to take on other folk's problems, that weight is not yours."

"But-"

"You trust me, right?" Vega interrupted him softly, cupping his face so that he had to look at her.

"With my life, General Vega."

The rapid sincerity of his reply startled her and Backhand needed to take a moment, steeling herself yet again. "I know you trust Cade too, and I know this won't be a quick or easy process. But you accepting that whatever happened was not your fault would be a huge first step."

"I...If I do…" Danse paused, hesitating. "Vega, if I forget about him..."

"Hey, nobody said anything about forgetting. You told me about Cutler, about how important he was to you. There's no way someone like you could forget about him. But you need to forgive yourself, you have to understand that losing him was not your fault." Once more she found herself in over her head, but she did her best to tell him all the things she wished someone had told her when Sergeant Cathan had died.

"He was...he was everything to me." Danse's voice cracked. "And I had to--I had to, he was...I had to."

"What happened to Cutler and his team was an immense tragedy, and a needless one at that." Cade spoke up from his seat, his brow furrowed. "Maxson outed himself quite thoroughly during the trial, I would say. It will be difficult for him to explain his actions away when so many witnesses heard exactly what he said."

Elizabeth felt Danse go still, the paladin hanging on to Cade's every word. "Am I even permitted to be happy that he may face consequences?" He asked uncertainly, wringing his hands. "Is that a breach of protocol, Knight-Captain?"

The medical officer shifted his weight, leaning forward to prop himself up with his elbows on his knees. "I can't promise you swift justice, you know how the Brotherhood operates. But Arthur invoked the right of a litany trial, then proceeded to break his own terms. To say nothing of the fact that he nearly killed someone uninvolved in the trial." Cade shook his head. "His abuse flourished in secrecy. Now that everything is out in the open, I do not believe even his status as the last Maxson will sway the other elders when they pass judgement."

"Thank you, Knight-Captain." Danse closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. "I...thank you, Vega." He continued, a little quieter. He caught her hand in his own, giving it a cautious squeeze. Almost as if he was imitating her gesture from earlier in the week. "I have so much to think about."

"Agreed. Shall I put in a request to Brandis for a leave of absence?"

Danse visibly recoiled at Cade's suggestion, his eyes going wide in dismay. "No! No, I am needed, Knight-Captain. After our assault has been carried out, and the Institute has been wiped from the map, I…" he hesitated, like the words were caught in his throat. "I will gladly take a leave. Until then, however, there is still work to do."

"There is always work to do, Paladin." Cade chided. "Remember what I told you? You will burn yourself out and the Brotherhood can ill afford to lose you."

"I'll see to it that he takes time off after our successful operation." Backhand stated firmly. Cade raised an eyebrow at that and Danse flushed across the bridge of his nose, stuttering a little. "Your health is important to me, Danse. You can be as stubborn as you want, but I'm not letting you weasel out of this."

"I suppose that will have to do." Cade sighed. "Do you have any questions for me, Paladin?"

Danse shot a sidelong glance at Vega that she was relatively certain she wasn't supposed to see, the large man worrying his lower lip. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on her part, though, as Danse shook his head after a moment. "No, I...I just have some reflection to do." He got to his feet abruptly, saluting both Cade and Elizabeth. "Ad Victoriam, Knight-Captain. Ad Victoriam, General Vega."

Cade returned the salute absently, already absorbed in writing something else down. Vega was a little slower, her query of, "do you need me, Danse?" coming out softer than she had intended.

She wanted to believe that the paladin hesitated before he replied, "No, General Vega. I can manage."

Part Eighteen

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authenticcadence18 · 3 years

Note

in the spirit of the other anon: what are some of your favorite pnf songs?? 👀

AHHH MADDY PLS YOU KNOW I LOVE MUSIC AND PHINEAS AND FERB THANK YOUUUU FOR THIS ASK.

ok so! favorite songs! I’ve got a ton so let’s just jump right to it (see what i did there? lol)

What Might Have Been

This is my FAVORITE Phineas and Ferb song, I remember when whispers about a “Phinbella duet” first started circulating mid-2012 and being SO HYPED (I was so hyped I wrote my own Phinbella duet, lollllll. maybe I’ll post it sometime). I waited literal YEARS for this song and it was VERY WORTH THE WAIT. I love the instrumentation (the strings? the guitar? the drums? the hint of Isabella’s theme at the beginning of the third verse? a A H), the lyrics are just so heartfelt and sweet and poignant (with just a hint of trademark PnF humor thrown in, lol), and the vOCALS GOOD LORD, ALYSON AND VINCENT KILLED IT. And the harmonies at the end. Bless. AYA isn’t perfect but I ADORE “What Might Have Been.” Like, they really gave us a 3 1/2 minute long song of Isabella and Phineas singing about being in love. They did that for us. Sometimes, I listen to it on a loop when I need to focus...or just because I want to listen to it. It’s truly just. The best. Ah. My heart. This song deserves more mainstream attention dANG IT.

Summer Belongs To You

This song is so uplifting and positive and the beginning is a Phinabella duet of COURSE I love it (i deeefinitely made a lil’ reference to it in a certain simile in chapter 9 of CHFIL, not sure if anyone caught that but writing it made me smile!). It always puts me in a good mood and makes me feel like I can accomplish anything. And it gets bonus points because it features Candace singing about loving her brothers!! SBTY is also one of the episodes that got me interested in the show, so this song holds a special place in my heart.

City of Love

This song ALSO holds a special place in my heart. Like, it’s so sad but it’s so good. I love Isabella, and I feel for her (and when I first heard this song I could 100% relate to her plight, LOL). This is also the first PnF song I ever downloaded! So it’s very nostalgic and special to me.

Us Against the Universe

I ADORE THIS SONGGG I ADORE IT SO MUCH OK IT’S JUST EVERYTHINGGG. It makes me feel ALL THE THINGS. It’s very similar to “Summer Belongs To You,” but rather than being rooted in nostalgia, it’s like a reminder that the characters are still as present and united as ever. A couple years ago, I never would’ve thought we’d get to hear the entire cast sing together ever again, so like....this song means the world to me. It’s a great song for 2020.

The Universe is Against Me

This is ALSO the perfect song for 2020, but in a venting way as opposed to an uplifting way like the previous song. I love the imagery in the lyrics (and like...they’re surprisingly real and raw for Phineas and Ferb) Singing along to it is so cathartic, I could listen to this one on a loop and not get tired of it.

Happy New Year

THIS SONG DESERVES TO BE ON AN ALBUM. I listen to it every new year; it really captures the feeling of New Year’s Eve and the celebration of starting over (and also. uh. I will forever associate it with Phinabella and lovely Phinabella vibes because of that scene of them dancing together).

Busted

Busted is iconic. Plain and simple. I adore it. Love the harmonies, love the vibe, I’m pretty sure this was the most listened to song on my old iPod, lol.

Somebody Gimme a Grade

I was (and am...lol) 100% the kid who had to have the best grades they could, so this song speaks to me on an emotional level. I also love the clever wordplay--like, “you wasted all my time learning how to rhyme then left me hangin’ from a treble clef!” is sUCH A GOOD LINE LIKE WHO THOUGHT OF THAT IT’S BRILLIANT. I also love getting to see Baljeet come out of his shell a bit and express himself!

Happy Evil Love Song

This is one of my go-to songs to play on the ukulele! It’s just so funny and sweet (as long as you don’t think about what happens after it, lol).

I Really Don’t Hate Christmas

THIS SONG. I LOVE IT. I love that it pokes fun at the “villains hating Christmas” trope while also subverting it! It’s just, so soooooo so great. I have a great time trying to sing it each Christmas season, LOLLLL. (because those are some FAST lyrics. how did Dan do it????)

That Christmas Feelin’

This is one of my favorite Christmas songs ever!!! It really captures the vibe and joy of the season, and I always go out of my way to play it when hanging out with people who might not know it’s from Phineas and Ferb! lol

In The Empire

One of my biggest flexes is being able to sing the entire “It’s sO NOT FAIR....” section of this song, LOLLLL. It’s just such a fun one to sing!!! (or attempt to sing....hah. Ashley has SKILLS.)

Ferb Latin

Ok, this one might seem a little random, but as a musician, I am OBSESSED with how the three melodies intersect and blend together at the end of the song!!! It sounds SO GOOD. (Plus. Phinabella duet. Yes. Are y’all detecting a pattern?)

Aerial Area Rug

So I’ll just go ahead and say PHINABELLA first because this song has MASSIVE Phinabella vibes (I mean it begins with a homage to the “do you trust me?” scene with Phineas and Isabella, that’s like pure-seratonin right there). And this song is also genuinely just so beautiful. It’s sung so well and the instrumentation is gorgeous and the lyrics are so literal but like, they work very well. (and that key change baby, I love a good key change!)

Gitchee Gitchee Goo

Gitchee Gitchee Goo means that I love you! It’s a classic, and super catchy, and totally reminds me of Phinabella even though in the context of canon that isn’t what it’s about at all😅. Also! Candace and Phineas singing and having fun together will always make me smile. I crave wholesome sibling interactions.

Thank You For Coming Along

THIS SONG MAKES ME FEEL THINGS....I really can’t think of a better send off the show could’ve had. I love how genuine it is, like a love letter to the fans, with all the references and such (I’m a sucker for fourth wall breaks, lol)! And I mean, that Phinabella moment near the end is just MAGNIFIQUE, YES, FOURTH WALL BREAK, PHINABELLA KISS REFERENCES, AND PHINEAS FLIRTING WITH ISABELLA??? WE LOVE TO SEE IT.

We’re Back

and THIS SONG. THIS SONG RIGHT HERE. I can’t think of a better re-introduction to these characters after saying goodbye to them years ago. This song really feels like a warm hug, a welcome home. The music video Disney released for it is especially wonderful because it incorporates scenes from the show!!! I always rock out to this one whenever it comes on. It’s a gift, truly. I love it. I needed this song this year!!!

Ok I could go on and on and on but this post is getting really long so I think I’d better just post it, LOL. Maybe I can make a pt. 2 sometime, LOL. Because there are plenty of other songs I love!!!

THANKS FOR THE ASK MADDY I HAD SO MUCH FUN WITH THIS!!!!!!

#sorry this post is so long #typed it out on my computer😅#long post #phineas and ferb #phineas and ferb music #cadence rambles

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itspgyall · 4 years

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Lineup was not liked but it was expected. I knew Vlatko would wanna rest most of the key players for the semi and finals.

I hope I do not see McDonald for the rest of the competition. If she beat out Pugh for a spot with such mediocre play that means Pugh must have been terrible in camp. Yes she got two goals but I would be surprised if she didnt put those away. A deflection off a defender in the box for the first and a practically wide open net from a great pass from Mewis for the second. She is terrible as a winger. Her crosses are terrible and she keeps trying to have the ball roll pass her to run it down to the end line and she either looses it or pokes it out of bounds. Anyways moving on.

Press was a beast tonight. Passes were great. Crosses were great. Shots were fabulous. Goals were superb.

Naeher didn’t get much of a challenge as Costa Rica was mostly defending throughout the match.

Sonnett was good. I love that she is getting playing time. She did really well on the left. Linking up nicely with Pinoe when she was subbed on.

Krieger as CB. I AM HERE FOR IT. Her passes out of the back were on fleek especially that assist for Press. Broon and Krieger at CB, sign me up.

Dahlkemper was meh. She did her job I guess. Hard to tell as she didn’t really have much of a challenge.

Mewis a bit average initially.I was like girl what you doing. But she really came out firing in the later part of the game. Happy she got a brace. That second goal was jus 😱. Shock factor mostly coming from the fact that I did not think it went in. Like most everyone else.

The Great Horan. I mean she is called the Great Horan for a reason. I don’t think I have ever seen her have a bad game. That girl is a true Baller. Great work as usual. Passes were clean. Goal was clean. Aerial duels on fleek.

Ertz. I didn’t watch much of the first half so I can’t really give an honest assessment here.

Same for Dunn. Can’t give an honest assessment.

Subs

O’Hara I’m always glad to see O’Hara playing. She was doing great over the right side. I’m jus sorry she had to link up with McDonald. She was trying but it wasn’t working. No error on her part I might add. She had some great crosses into the back. Except for that one cross, all I can say is I laughed just as hard as she did)

Pinoe. Always a beast on the field. Linked up nicely with Sonnett and Heath. Great crosses in the box. She didn’t really have a great impact like the Haiti match but she was out there trying to make things happen. I expect to see way more out of her for the semis and finals. The matches that really couny.

Heath. What can I say I am a sucker for Tobito. Love to watch her play. I am glad she is building up her minutes. Hope she gets more time in the semis and final. You can see she wasn’t really putting a 110% like we are used to but I am attributing that to her recovery and the fact that this game didn’t require much. Her cheekiness was spotted a few times which we love. She linked up nicely with Pinoe, Horan and Press. I expect to see her minutes increase in the next two matches and her inner beast come out.

Oh yes Lloyd. 2 assists. That’s nice. We also need someone to wear that armband when Broom, Pinoe and Heath aren’t playing. Happy that Vlatko is giving her some minutes. Didn’t watch much of the first half to give a full assessment of her performance.

Overall good match. A bit slow in places and a lot choppy in the last half. But the girls got the job done. Press is my player of the match. She is shining now with Alex out of the way and I am here for it. 2020 is Press’ year.

#tobin heath #christen press #lindsey horan #emily sonnett #megan rapinoe #sam mewis #julie ertz #crystal dunn #ali krieger #abby dahlkemper #uswnt #carli lloyd #jessica mcdonald #kelly o’hara #alyssa naeher #mallory pugh

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evolutionsvoid · 4 years

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The Elmis Spires are a rather bizarre species that are found in equally bizarre places. The ecosystems they live in are rather rare and many people don't even know they exist! This may be in part because they share a name with another type of habitat. The place these strange critters live in are known as Volcanic Deserts, but they probably aren't the ones you think! Most volcanic deserts are barren places where vegetation struggles to grow. This is due to volcanic activity, which leads to large amounts of tephra and acidic rain. If you visited these regions, you wouldn't think too much of them. It would look like any other dry, rocky desert, save for the nearby volcano. The volcanic desert I am referring to is a much more imposing beast. These places are more like the sandy deserts made of great dunes and ergs. Except here, the sand is black. This is because the sand is made from the hardened lava that pours from the volcano. Wind and weather slowly breaks these rocks down to fine obsidian sand. Dunes made of darkness would already be interesting on their own, but that isn't all of it. The volcanoes that form these rare ecosystems must be active, and they are constantly oozing molten lava. So it is a desert that has rivers and streams, but not any you would want to drink from! These white hot flows travel throughout the desert, slowly cooling into the rock that will turn to sand. I feel that this habitat is what people think the Underworld is, a land of pitch black rock and rivers of burning lava. However, these are places you find right here on the surface, but they aren't easy to find and are even harder to survive in. It seems like every bit of these volcanic deserts (or obsidian deserts) is designed to create misery. The many dunes and ergs make travel difficult, as you sink and slip with practically every step. While the sand itself is very coarse and awful, it pales in comparison to the juts of volcanic rock you may find. These stones have the nasty habit of forming razor sharp edges that can slice through skin or bark with hardly any effort. Going near any of these rocky formations will guarantee a slicing, be it your clothing, equipment or your own body. And don't forget that these rocks can break into small pieces and get buried in the same colored sand! So you might just step somewhere and get a shard jabbed into your foot! How lovely! Then there is the issue about water. Since most of the landscape is sand, you won't be finding many pools or sources of groundwater. Your best bet is to get it from the storms that frequent these lands, but best of luck to you on that! Many of the storms that hit these deserts don't create rain, just crazy winds and an absurd amount of lightning. It currently isn't known why these ecosystems get so many of these powerful storms, but some think it may be a result of the landscape and mountains. Regardless, when one of these suckers hit, you want to be in shelter or literally anywhere else in the world. High winds churn up the sand and create dust storms of ludicrous proportions. A mixture of ash, obsidian and sand will fill the air, making it difficult and dangerous to breath. Even with proper breathing protection, the high speed of these aerial particles will make it feel like you are sliding down a mountain of sandpaper. Any exposed part of your body can have thin layers worn off, leaving some painful wounds. And if that doesn't sound bad enough, just wait til the lightning comes in! The storms that form in these areas seem to generate a crazy amount of lightning, which rain down on these deserts like explosive arrows. The whole sky will crackle and glow as webs of energy slither through the clouds. Bolts will plunge forth and strike the dunes with devastating force. Though these storms only last for minutes, it feels like hours when you are trapped in the middle of one! So if I haven't made it obvious enough yet, volcanic deserts are rough places. Some say they look like places where some villain would make their evil lair, but I assure you that even they would hate these habitats. I mention all of that to stress the point that these ecosystems are incredibly dangerous and harsh, which makes it astounding to realize that life is found there. Despite the storms, the razor stones and whipping sands, there are a number of species that call this place home. The Elmis Spire is one of those denizens, and they are perfectly built for such a rough place! Their body is coated in a thick exoskeleton to ward of the stinging sands and sharp rocks. Their many skittering legs allow them to move quickly across the dunes as well as scale any rocky formations they encounter. They are also capable of burrowing in the sand, using their legs and lower barb to dig themselves downward. The barb that protrudes from the bottom of their body is often mistaken for their mouth, as many see it as a toothy beak. Since their eyes are also down there, it make sense for that to be their mouth, right? In actuality, their mouth is located on their "abdomen." The vertical slit in their body is an orifice that they use for both respiration and feeding. It can open and close like any other mouth, but it is instead built for filtering rather than biting or chewing! Strainers and web-like membranes lie within this orifice, sifting through the air and sand for bits of food. Some may wonder what sustenance could be found in this dry air, it turns out that the answer is: spores! While green vegetation is almost nonexistent in this land, their role has been taken over by fungi! The most common fungus found here is the Fume Stalk, which is actually a keystone to the whole ecosystem! These large chimney-like growths are found lining the "banks" of these lava "rivers." These fungi seem to feed off the heat and gas that comes from these molten flows, turning it all into mass and extra growths. Other fungi species have taken up this role too, but none as plentiful as the Fume Stalk! They honestly look like some coral formation you would see in the ocean, not in some scorched desert! Though these towering stalks are many and fleshy looking, they themselves are awful food sources. Due to their diet and surroundings, their flesh is inedible to most creatures, perhaps even poisonous. I heard someone say that biting into one is like "trying to eat a crusty moldy apple that is filled with glass." Since I have no desire to test their description, I am going to say it is an accurate one! No idea how they know that, but I am going to guess that it isn't a happy story.

Though the Fume Stalk itself is rather inedible to most, it does provide an alternative food source. As they feed and grow, they release plumes of spores from their chimneys, filling the air with their young. These spores are meant to land near the molten rivers and grow into new stalks, but many don't get the chance. Wind and weather can spread these clouds in many directions, sending them to all corners of the desert. Though many may land in the cold black sands, their loss is insignificant. Fume Stalks pump out thousands if not millions of these spores a day, fueled by the constant heat of the lava. Any spores that land away from the rivers are trivial to the Fume Stalks, but they are blessings to the local wildlife. These clouds are what many of the lower members of the food web feed on, and the Elmis Spire is one of them. Their gaping mouths suck in these spores and then filter them out from the non-edible particles. The air and waste is released through the pores on its backside, allowing the Elmis Spire to have a constant flow of food and air through its body. Surrounding this area is a cluster of tendrils that its uses to taste and smell the air. These help it detect areas that are dense with spores, as well as smell danger before it can attack. After learning more about these creatures, I really wonder why something would even dare do such a thing! Though small and thin, Elmis Spires are not easy prey. Their spiky armor is not pleasant to bite, and they can scurry away quite quick! If escape is not possible, they will burrow into the sand and hide their body down below, leaving only the large yellow spike exposed. This at first seems like a simple defense, but that is until you realize the power they hide within themselves. When one of these storms sweeps through the desert, the Elmis Spires will seal their mouths and scramble to the nearest rock formation. They will climb to the top and anchor themselves with their clawed feet. There they will raise their tall spike up high and wait. While others run and hide from the winds and lightning, these little guys welcome it. By doing something strange with their internal anatomy, they are able to boost their chances of being struck by a bolt, which somehow doesn't kill them. Instead, their bodies have a way of taking this energy and storing it. These guys essentially use lightning to charge themselves up! You will see their bright spikes gain a faint glow when they have filled up, as it stands out quite obviously against the black sands. When they are charged, they are capable of releasing this energy when need to be, and that perfect time is when something is trying to bite them. Touching the rear spike of a charged Elmis Spire is a good way to get blasted off your feet. They release a powerful shock from their stored energy to fry their attackers and it is a potent weapon! However, this defense can only be used when they have energy stored up. After multiple shocks, they will be depleted and will have to wait until the next storm to recharge. Predators of theirs have learned how to trick them into attacking and draining their buildup, finally going in for the kill once they are dry. It is a risky maneuver though, as one slip up can wind up giving you jolt straight to the face! There is a current theory that the Elmis Spire may be distantly related to barnacles. With that in mind, many have wondered if they are also related to the Selsillik that live in the temperate rainforests. It is hard to say, as these two live in wildly different environments, but they do have some similar features. I would say that future research is needed to truly know, but that would make it sound like I was volunteering for such a thing. It is not because I dislike barnacles, I quite like them! Then again, researching them for years and years would be quite maddening. Some of the greatest minds have endured such tortures, but that isn't my point! The reason I wouldn't want to be a part of this project is because working in the volcanic deserts is quite miserable. Each ecosystem I have ever visited have their own negatives, but volcanic deserts are some of the worst for me. Pretty to look at, but absolutely wretched to experience. The grating sands, the knife-edged rocks and those awful storms that turn the whole land into a nightmare. I spent four weeks in one of those deserts, and it was four weeks of weary research and pondering my life choices. Just wondering how I wound up in such an awful place and why I was still there. It was curiosity's fault as usual, as I just couldn't pass up an opportunity like this! Its strangeness and uniqueness hypnotized me, and I fell face first into that siren's call! As I hunkered down in pitch black spiky caves, hoping the lightening wouldn't blast me to pieces, I just wondered: why here? Why couldn't I be a researcher that studied only nice places with good weather and wonderful locales? Like when I spent two months in a rainforest with the Furceros as I looked into local insect populations. Seeing rare colorful creatures, collecting new specimens for my bug collection, then ending it off with fig wine and festivities! Or when I buried myself in the archives for three weeks delving into the historical records of Bone Dragons! Losing myself in decades of knowledge, enjoying herring pie and falling asleep on a mound of books! Or when I went to literal Hel in the Underworld and found out that it had wonderful restaurants! The local cuisine is to die for and the Isodon Gumbo is a taste of perfection. Any of those places besides this storm ravaged wasteland! I have been in some pretty rough spots before, but being in a volcanic desert really made me wonder about retirement. But in the end, I do it all because I love research and discovery. Volcanic deserts are a rare and unique ecosystem filled with utterly bizarre creatures. As a lover of nature and natural history, I cannot resist the wonders that emerge in such a place. Though I curse its existence now, I bet you anything I will be back there again. Chlora Myron Dryad Natural Historian ------------------------------------------------------------ If I didn't have enough on my plate already, I just had to make another ecosystem. This one is a bit implausible, but this is a world that has magic in it already, so it is probably fine. This land was made from the mental image I got when I first heard of "volcanic deserts." It sounded so cool and crazy, but then I found that they are just rocky arid places around a volcano. Not so crazy. So I decided to have fun with it!

#monster #creature #art #drawing #lightning rod #volcanic desert

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animewithairplanewings · 5 years

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青空少女隊

801 T.T.S Airbats (Blue Sky Woman’s Squadron in Japanese) is a military-comedy manga created by Toshimitsu Shimizu, which was published by Tokuman Shoten between July 1991 and October 1992. The OVA adaptation was directed by Yuji Moriyama and was produced by Studio Fantasia between May 1994 and March 1996.

The anime follows aviation mechanic Takuya Isurugi after he is transferred to the 801st Tactical Training Squadron, an all-woman aerobatics team in the Japan Air Self-Defense Force (JASDF). Isurugi is caught up in the drama and hijinks of a squad that is always one mistake away from being disbanded.

Airbats is something of a refreshing comedy in the airplane genre, which (naturally) tends to be more focused on the drama of aerial warfare; it has its serious moments, but it always falls back onto that over-the-top, screamy, sometimes raunchy humor that typified early 90’s comedy anime. And Isurugi is something of an audience-insert character, being himself a shy otaku.

Airplanes, then, and more importantly the aerobatics, become another vehicle to play out the drama and the comedy of the show. How the characters fly is directly correlated to their mental states and their relationships with each other, the grounded world and the aerial flowing together. It is fitting that Isurugi is the mechanic and not another pilot, because his ultimate role is to repair broken relationship of Haneda and Mitaka, rather than coming in and “putting them in their places.”

The attention to detail in the animation of the planes themselves was also very nice, and a lot of work was obviously put into the designs as there are several members of the JASDF credited as advisors. And as always, I will praise this show for its hand drawn animation of the machines, which I am an absolute sucker for. I was, however, looking for more. In a show about an airforce squadron an unfortunate amount of the seven episode run being a bit lacking, with several episodes having only a few shots of planes.

In the end 801 T.T.S. Airbats earns itself 4 airplanes out if 5, with good use while they are there, cut with the fact that they could have easily had more.

Hey folks! If you liked what you read, consider liking and sharing this post, and following me to see more. And if you really liked it, consider visiting my Patreon page, where you can get exclusive content like early updates and my notes!

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ourmanifestoisfun · 5 years

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4x16 episode thoughts

I have thoughts! And also possibly a rather unpopular opinion at the conclusion.

Rebecca...no creeping on Dr Akopian!

“I’m retired from stalking but you never lose the skills”

Loving “The Bachelor” shade and that Dr Akopian’s advice is just, no catfights

Also really amused by the “big chairs” thing because, well, yeah. Coffee shops be like that sometimes.

I will forever be confused about how much money Nathaniel is meant to have access to

Shirts stay on LOL - but Skylar is so ripped though! Maybe just the arms.

Mm yeah, taking one dollar off breakfast specials does tend to make people bonkers

Paula’s new job is actually, gasp, A JOB! Must be an adjustment from Whitefeather

Also her and Scott have a four times-a-week marital sex quota? DAMN they’ve come far.

While the gurlgroup’s opinions are definitely just meant to reflect the fandom rather than what they probably would think, I’m still amused

Paula is probably a good example of ‘even when you try to give it up, those damn OTP feels come back’. Also, I can buy that she would be suspicious of Nathaniel re: infidelity

Heather flipping from Team Greg to Team Nathaniel just amuses me. Then again, she did also date Greg.

Calling him Armie Hammer hot definitely made me laugh though. And I really hope there is a video of Nathaniel singing Etta Mae’s Lament just floating around out there, because that would be great.

Greg being a different actor in a “moral, political sense”, hah, that’s good

And now they’ve actually kicked off a betting pool. Whoops!

WHIJO SONG AND HE’S KILLING IT

God love those outfits. Valencia’s especially, damn

Damn Father Brah, also “priest school” callback!

They finally got Donna Lynn tapdancing! And Valencia’s pirouettes!

...oh they called back to the Group Mind!

God that was some awesome choreography.

Okay, they are lampshading Greg being the underdog already.

That is quite a cut of the number of times that Paula has said she doesn’t like Greg...but on the flip side, she has described him as sexy multiple times as well.

I like that they are trying to make a point that Josh isn’t trying to live in the past with this date, because I could see that as an easy write-off, but the fact that this is the well he returns to is still a little concerning for me.

Oh, they did bang in summer camp! Well, did stuff. I’ve always gone back and forth on that point.

God I am a sucker for stars, that was lovely

Valencia I hope your finances are okay after all of this

Noted: Paula works at Eastbriar Law Group

“So you don’t disappoint your son again” GREG NO BAD you still have not improved on your words.

Also yeah, being in Paula’s good graces is probably still a good thing, but she’s still not Rebecca. Still, that was a lovely gesture, Gregory.

“I’ve been hoping that the San Andreas fault will open up and swallow Nathaniel” aldkfjskdfjdk this was cute

But this is so awkward, with Josh living at the house. I hope that whatever next week’s decision is, that he chooses to move out on his own.

Nathaniel’s date location is gorgeous. Isn’t that the spot where Rachel and her husband got married? I can totally see why.

That is very clever about listening to the concert, Nathaniel, though I do love that his date went a little bit wrong. Going with the flow is part of your new mantra, dude.

GOD THAT WAS CUTE

...Though the fact that the aerial shots came from a drone is prettyyy creepy. Y’all are being kind of scary here.

I do love that Darryl bet on Nathaniel. “Papa’s got a winner!”/“Mama’s got a winner!”

WEIRD AL OMG!

WHERE’S THE BATHROOM REPRISE OH MY GODDDDD

poor Weird Al balloon guy. Do not shit in his balloon.

Rebecca, stop stalking Dr Akopian!

The Love’s a Game reprise is very bittersweet, because it’s too true: everyone is going to be hurt in some way, whether she chooses one or none of them. And THAT’S why people hate love polygons!

The thought of Nathaniel betting on himself really amused me

I like how the theme of games keeps coming up - they are supposed to be fun, they are not supposed to matter, even if you lose you're meant to just shake it off and go back to your everyday life...but those things aren’t always true. They can matter and they can hurt. None of these guys are treating these dates like a game, even if they use the lingo and the people around them are placing their bets, because at the end of the day, they all care.

“Death by lightning bolt. It’s quick, it’s painless. I do like the guy, after all.” - idk I just found this line really, really funny.

I hope Valencia didn’t lose too much money, poor baby.

Greg and Rebecca’s end banter is really sweet.

So...this may be an unpopular and even wrong opinion, but I think that Greg’s date puts him even with the other guys, rather than necessarily ahead of them. Greg being able to tell Rebecca that she is the love of his life is absolutely character development: he’s come full circle from his fuck-up at Jayma’s wedding back in season 1: even back then, Rebecca didn’t need trappings of true romance (at least not by the end of the night) to stay with him, she just needed him to tell her how he felt about her. Given her mental health at that point, there is a very good question as to how long that would have been enough before she tripped back into obsession with Josh, but it would have meant something.

However, I think I will be very annoyed if it is played as the “truest” romance. Neither Josh nor Nathaniel said anything like that admission on their dates because it isn’t something they are afraid of because they have already told Rebecca that they love her - Nathaniel by his own admission has done this several times. Instead, their dates highlighted the qualities about them where they have fun with Rebecca. And it isn’t that Rebecca doesn’t enjoy the dates - it’s the ticking clock at the end that is freaking her out, because love is not a game.

That doesn’t mean that there isn’t the set up for it: they have paralleled Josh and Nathaniel a lot this season in regards to Rebecca, which does make Greg the odd one out and they would be able to have him be the endgame with that justification that he’s different...but given that and the way this episode is structured, as well as the consistent lampshading of Greg as the underdog, that really feels like the straightforward solution and this show...doesn’t do that.

And look at the wording of how the guys tell Rebecca that they care:

Josh: “It’s always felt like someone is writing a story about us” Nathaniel: “I think we’re meant to be together.” Greg: “You know you’re the love of my life, right?”

All of these lines, even Greg’s, with his lowkey, domestic date, are about the incredible narrative importance of Rebecca in their lives, in the past, present, and future. For Josh, it’s how she’s kept returning to his life. For Nathaniel, she made him imagine a new life going forward. For Greg, it’s how just being with her has such an effect on him. And, frankly, those sentiments aren’t exclusive to each guy - you can apply each one to all of them. But that’s also why I felt the dates turned out more even keeled, despite the structure. And at this point, I really doubt they’ll try to pull the ‘oh it isn’t genuine love’ for any of them.

In addition, People have been making the point for some time that having her pick one of the guys might end up feeling weird, because it would turn the show into the “Rebecca & _____” story, instead of it being Rebecca’s story. The most likely scenario to me is still that Rebecca ends up alone/possibly with Jason, while the other guys are shown to have moved on with their lives. Everyone who has followed this blog will know that I very much have my bias, and I always will. This episode did not change that one whit. But beyond that, given the spoilers for next week, I think everyone will get a little fanservice with their favored guys, but that ultimately, she will not be choosing any of them. But I think they will all be happy, and that means a lot.

I love this show, guys, and I’m going to miss it.

#ceg spoilers #season 4 #crazy ex girlfriend #episode thoughts

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icicledream-archive · 5 years

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i wanna talk about marx kirby because i love him so here we go. please don’t shove me into a locker again this is mostly gonna be about my marx gijinka but basically all of these can apply to his canon form too, of course (if u are like me and think that his wings can be used like arms

first off he’s nonbinary and also a lesbian. don’t fight me on this, if you do YOU’RE the one going into the locker, buddy! (he’s a soft butch). anyways. despite being nonbinary and prefering he/him pronouns he kind of prefers being called things like sister, queen, princess, girlfriend, etc. he also binds most of the time! surprisingly enough he’s a very big advocate on healthy binding. he is 23 years old! for simplicity’s sake i like to think that pop star has the same rotation and revolution speed as earth, so!

marx is very good at some circus things. balancing on a ball is one of them, of course, but a few others are: rola bola, juggling, some aerial acrobatics (trapeze is not one of them). he’s also good at dancing. and playin violin. and riding unicycles. and playing violin while on unicycles he’s also real good at pantomiming but he will totally suddenly yell or speak to startle n catch people off guard

he has autism and ADHD, however i am not educated on ADHD to a point where i’m comfortable talking about it so i will be quiet about it. some of his fav stims, however, are playing with slime, humming, swaying back and forth/shuffling, and flapping his wings/arms when he is happy/excited. he’s also almost always doing some sort of dance to add on to the dancing bit, he’s pretty good at it. especially ballet dancing, and he incorporates that into other styles. while marx isn’t troubled by things like depression, dancing is one of the things that never fails to make him genuinely happy!

he is a noddy! but he’s has insomnia. while he sleeps as much as the average person (bout 8 hours plus an afternoon nap sometimes), for a noddy that is bad considering i like to think they sleep for 14-18 hours a day because of this though he had more than enough time to learn how to do all the things he can do! he also learned how to cook very well, however he is extremely lazy and only cooks for himself when he absolutely has to, so no one really knows he’s a great cook. except his sister circe, my kirby oc

marx is a sucker for physical interaction and will cuddle with anyone that allows it. gryll, being his best friend, is always the cuddle victim. however they enjoy cuddles too so it’s ok

i theorise that marx got all of his powers + his wings from nova! he is able to use his powers nowadays but it hurts him. except for his wings! he can fly and stretch n flap them whenever he wants.

ok this is pretty long now so bye

#hoo hoo!#fun hcs #long post #u guys have no idea how happy marx makes me #maybe like 3 or 4 of you know

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thatdragonsdrabbles · 5 years

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[I'll make the assumption that it's not a result of Lucina dying, and simply an AU sort of thing where for some reason using (Parallel) Falchion is not necessarily hereditary. You're more of the tragic adventure fan than I am. *That dragon blows a rapsberry.]

Other future kids wielding Falchion

Owain of course would be a likely candidate, and a good fit, for using Falchion. He has a hyperfocus on swords, especially the “legendary blades,” and he could be flashy with such a cool heccin' blade. But he doesn't shy away from the serious bits. Sure, he might get carried away with his heroic storytelling, but when stuff goes down you know he's stepping up to the plate to do what needs to be done. He would be more likely to take it if the situation arose, or if Lucina wanted to spar using a different weapon. He would take it in his epilogue given permission, though he might rename it for “the start of a new fantastic tale.”

Kjelle is obviously powerful, so her strikes would really pack a punch, if perhaps slower. She has more of an interest in lances, but doesn't avoid other weapons in her quest to be the best defender Ylisse has. She would need tips from Lucina and other more experienced sword-wielders to truly be comfortable using it. Honestly though, she would be more hesitant to take it, even with Lucina's blessing. There's a slight feeling of not being the one the blade is meant for, regardless of her ability to use it. She would see no need to keep it in the epilogue, because fated blade or not, it's served its purpose and would be better suited in other hands.

Cynthia would make an interesting sword-using pegasus knight! She seems more inclined to learn a new weapon-type, especially for cool heroics. Now, whether she'd be particularly talented or not, is dependant on her nailing things in training and not getting too distracted by stunt ideas. She would definitely need lots of pointers from Lucina. But with the right guidance, she'll be able to go toe-to-toe with other aerial units, and maybe even pull off those awesome entrances! She could keep Falchion in the epilogue, or she could give it up, but either way she's being dramatic about it. Heroes gotta have stories told about them!

Laurent is not at all interested in wielding Falchion. Why would he be? Unless he could manage a spell that utilizes Falchion's interesting powers, or suspend it in arcane matrixes to launch like a projectile. Which now that he thinks about it, would be a very intriguing spell. He might want to do experiments on it. He'll attempt wielding it if he has to, but even with his surety and steady hand he wouldn't benefit more from it than he would from magic. He could easily observe others' forms and incorporate them for his own, though. He leaves Falchion for sure for the epilogue, except perhaps to study its divine properties.

Brady would be really reluctant to pick up this blade. He's not cut out for that kind of crap, yunno? That's meant for the heroes and the guys that look good, not... well, a guy like him. It would take a lot out of him to try learning how to use it, too. He would need a lot of talking—and I mean a lot—to be convinced to use the thing, and in the end he wouldn't be that talented at it. The finesse escapes him. Training him to use Falchion would be a long project. There's no love lost between him and the sword in the epilogue, he'll leave that sucker with someone better for it.

Severa would utterly destroy with Falchion. She's stubborn enough to learn how to use it properly, after maybe a few tantrums when the stress really gets to her. And she'll definitely be hard on herself, partially from her mother's reputation and partially from Falchion's. Can't have just any loser using the sword, right? But she would force herself to become the best, and flaunt it well. A bit of a sore winner sometimes, but a good heart all the same. She would rather leave it with Lucina, but if not she'll take it for sentiment.

Nah wielding Naga's fang would be an interesting sight. It might also be a comedic one, with how tiny she is—just don't say that aloud, or she might threaten to eat you. It would be a bit out of her comfort zone, size notwithstanding. Becoming a dragon comes so naturally to her, so this new territory would frustrate her. But if it's truly important, she'll work hard at learning it, like an adult would. But she's not going to be taking it with her in her epilogue, not even as a trophy. It feels strange to carry around someone's tooth, godly or not.

Noire doesn't seem a likely candidate to wielding Falchion. But you have to remember the muscles required to use a bow properly, and the terrifying quality she has in the heat of combat. There'll definitely be some hurdles as far as technique goes, but with a supportive mentor she'll be capable enough. No one wants to mess with the woman cackling as she swings a sword. She doesn't have a great interest in it otherwise, so it wouldn't come with her in her epilogue. Not unless it has sentimental value, like memories with Lucina or another friend (or a crush).

Yarne would not be happy to learn how to use this blade. Asking him to get in the fray without the protection his transformation gives him is just plain crazy. It would take a lot of convincing from Lucina... and several others...maybe even his parents, or Robin, or both. But once he focuses on his need to protect others as well as himself, he'll put his absolute all into training. It's different from the knee-jerk reactions as a giant bunny, but he can work it into muscle memory. He might take the sword with him in his epilogue as a reminder to be brave.

Inigo is more than happy to take the Falchion off of Lucina's hands. Well, he'll hesitate a little. But do you realize how cool he'll look to the ladies with this legendary blade at his hip? Yes, of course he'll be serious, war isn't a game. He wants to defend everyone's rights to smile. He'll just use it to get attention from the ladies during his downtime. Is that so wrong? Maybe. He has less ground to cover for training, considering he's already familiar with swords. But it is a bit different from his usual. He'll probably take Falchion in his epilogue, if Lucina is all right with that.

Gerome would much rather use his own weapons, thank you. All right, if he needs to, he'll take it. Only Lucina could convince him. But it's far different from swinging an axe, and he doesn't want to endanger Minerva's life. He's more than a bit stubborn, so it'll take him longer to learn than some. But, he knows his duty, and he won't back down from the harsh reality that, one day, Lucina might not be able to use Falchion. It still feels wrong, but necessity overrides personal feelings. He doesn't want to take it for himself, so it would be returned to Lucina or the royal family in his epilogue.

Morgan (any gender) would be honored with the opportunity to wield Falchion. Robin never used it, right? What a way to surpass their parent! They can seem pretty airheaded and easygoing, but their training is a different story. Have to push themselves to become an even more legendary tactician, and to stop the world from spiraling into darkness. They'd observe and pick up pointers from everyone they can, especially Lucina, and prepare to utilize it in a worst-case scenario. They'd want to return it in their epilogue, but if Lucina didn't want to keep it for whatever reason, they'd want to put it on display, as a beacon of hope for future generations to keep fighting against the darkness.

#headcanons #fire emblem awakening #fire emblem cynthia #fire emblem owain #fire emblem laurent #fire emblem inigo #fire emblem gerome #fire emblem nah #fire emblem noire #fire emblem severa #fire emblem yarne #fire emblem morgan #fire emblem kjelle #fire emblem brady

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runmilder · 6 years

Text

Henchman

AO3 link here

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: DCU, DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types Rating: Teen Relationships: Dick Grayson/reader Tags: coffee dates, Mind Control, And Romance, oh my!, POV Second Person

Summary:

Sometimes you’re the hero. Sometimes you’re the victim. And sometimes… sometimes you’re just the overpaid lackey.

Living in Gotham is a bit like living in the eye of an infinite hurricane. Sure, it’s calm for now, but you can see the wall of the storm on all sides, and you’re left to wonder if you have enough time to make it to the 7-Eleven and back before the next wave hits. Except instead of rain and wind, it’s going to be clowns or cultists or whatever the villain flavor of the week happens to be.

This week, it’s… eldritch creatures?

“Oh, for the love of—” You dodge a whip-like tentacle and stumble into the brick siding of the convenience store. There’s nothing particularly convenient about it when its barred windows shatter and shower you in a fine hail of glass. You cover your head, eyes shut, and wish you’d just eaten what was in your fridge.

Somewhere nearby, sirens wail.

Today, it seems, you’ve been caught out in the storm. And unlucky you, you forgot to bring your umbrella and Lovecraft survival guide.

Another dark, writhing shape launches itself at you, suckers flaring, and you lunge into an alley at a run. You’ve seen this anime. Doesn’t end well for hapless schoolgirls.

Ordinarily, dark alleys are a huge no-go in Gotham city, but “ordinary” doesn’t really cover this situation. Besides, if there’s a gun-toting thug behind a dumpster, you hope the many-limbed creature—creatures?—go for them first.

Something flies over your head, close enough that you can feel the downdraft. You duck belatedly, knees hitting the pavement. There’s a sound like someone hitting a wet sack with a bat, then a crackle, a shriek, and a smell of charred meat. And over it all, the pervasive scent of garbage.

Eau-de-Gotham.

You turn to see the broad back of one of the city’s many costumed crusaders, and if you had the breath to spare, you’d sigh in relief. Nightwing wails on one thick tentacle, batons lit up and buzzing.

“Keep going!” he shouts back at you, hurtling into the heart of the mess. From the mouth of the alley, you see someone in red joining the fray.

Calvary present, you waste no time in booking it the rest of the way down the alley, resolving to take the long way back to your apartment.

Back home, the news blathers on about a science experiment gone wrong or some shit—what else is new—and switches to an aerial view of shadowed figures just going to town on equally dark, inhuman shapes. You can see your local junk food stop to their right, its windows shattered. You bet if you open your own window, you’ll be able to hear some of the commotion.

Your microwave shrills, and you flick off the television with a long-suffering sigh.

Just another Tuesday in Gotham.

Wednesday brings with it a fair number of actual storms, and a date with your sort-of boyfriend.

“You look rough,” he says, taking in your rain-ravaged form.

“Dick,” you say as both address and acknowledgment of his entirely uncalled-for observation.

He grins. “I bought you a coffee.”

“You’re on thin ice, buddy.” You take the proffered cup anyway.

Dick is sitting by the window of the coffee shop, legs stretched out under the small table. You sit across from him and try to figure out how to arrange your own limbs without disturbing him. He takes a sip of his drink, clearly amused, before trapping your legs between both of his own and settling back with a smug look. You consider struggling for a moment, but you can feel his muscles flexing beneath the denim, and hoo boy, that’s not a battle you’d win. You lean back, adopting what you hope is an impassive look, but from the way Dick continues to radiate smug satisfaction, you think it’s a loss.

“So,” you say, hoping to guide this interaction back to neutral ground. “How’s work?”

“Work’s good.” He shrugs, and you try not to stare at the way his shirt tightens around his shoulders. “Routine stuff. Uneventful.” He never wants to talk about work. “How’s class?”

You groan. That question has hounded you for the past four years.

“I just signed up for my last semester. Can’t come soon enough, honestly.”

Dick nods. “You continuing with that internship in the spring?”

“Mhm.” You jiggle your cup, feeling the liquid slosh. “Dr. Irving wants to keep me on. Says I’m “good with the kids.””

“The “kids” being…”

“Her plants,” you say.

You both share a smirk.

Dick sobers. “Listen,” he says. “I was thinking—”

“Dangerous.”

“Seriously.” His legs tighten around yours. “What if you had another offer?”

“Paying what she does? In this economy?” Your laugh is only half mocking. “Honestly, I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop there, but until then…” You raise your cup in a salute.

Dick leans forward. “What about double?”

“I’m sorry?”

“What if you were offered double what you’re making with the good doctor to… what? Water her plants and stay out of her way?”

Your mind blanks. “Uhh…”

Sounds shady as hell. You already feel like you’re getting away with highway robbery with what Dr. Irving is paying you. Or, at least, what her research lab is paying you. And also, rude, you do more than water plants and make yourself scarce.

You also make ungodly amounts of herbal tea.

“I… like all of my organs?” you finally say.

“I said a job, babe, not a back-alley procedure.”

“Actually, you said “offer,” which sounds infinitely more ominous.”

His eye-roll is more of a full-head-roll, and when his neck stretches, you catch sight of a discolored spot on the skin beneath his jaw.

“Is that a… hickey?” you say slowly. It doesn’t really look like a hickey. It actually looks like he was shot in the neck with a giant suction cup dart.

He claps a hand over the spot. “Um. N-yeah.”

“Nyeah?” You narrow your eyes.

This isn’t even about the possibility of Dick necking another person—a person with a lamprey mouth, apparently—as you’re not exactly clear on the parameters of your relationship. Such as it is. It’s just that the spot on his neck is niggling at something in your brain. His reaction is equally suspicious, although he locks it up pretty fast.

“Sorry, I—” He looks pained. “Stuff… happened last night. It was… electric.” The flat tone of his voice belies his words.

You open your mouth. Close it.

Is this where you ask for clarification about the two of you? Broach the topic of exclusivity?

…Why does this feel like one of those situations where a guy claims to have been watching porn when he’s really been watching something weirdly hard to explain, like Teletubby conspiracy theories?

“Dick, what’s really goi—” you start, but a low-tone buzz interrupts you, and Dick already has his discrete work phone in hand, eyes flicking over the screen.

He mutters something under his breath. “Look, I have to—” He looks at you, grimacing. “I am so, so sorry. I don’t mean to ditch you after—” He waves a hand to encompass the tense air between you.

You frown, confused and frustrated. You definitely feel like you’re missing something.

Dick slides his chair back, his legs detangling themselves from yours in one deft movement.

“Can I call you later?” he asks. The expression on his face speaks volumes for what answer he expects.

You surprise him by nodding. You’re still staring at the angry mark.

He lets out a short breath through his nose. “I—okay. Good.” He bends over you for a second, hesitating, before pecking you on the head. “Stay dry.”

And then he’s gone.

You’re left with half a cup of cooling coffee and a head full of questions.

Dr. Paula Irving is a little prickly, but also mostly absent, so she’s pretty much the best boss ever. When you were flipping through internship applications, S.T.A.R. Lab’s jumped out because—hello, “paid.” Right there in print. You weren’t sure what pittance could be expected for a botanist’s undergrad assistant, so when you interviewed—first with the lab, and then with the scientist herself—and she told you the sum, your jaw nearly hit the floor.

“It’s an incentive,” she said, eyes looking through you. “Treat them well.”

You didn’t care at that point whether her plants required only the blood of virgins—you were getting this internship, dammit.

Thankfully, the lab’s greenhouse inhabitants need only the usual upkeep: sunlight, water, and occasional pruning. You spend the first week learning the ins and outs of plant care under your employer’s watchful eye, and after that, you are left to your duties in silence. It’s calm, methodical work, and the green space is always nap-weather warm. It’s nice.

Sometimes, when you’ve finished tending the plants, you’re to help Dr. Irving with… whatever it is that she’s doing. It mostly involves you wearing protective gear in the little white tent she’s erected and keeping the temperature steady on the vials of plant extracts that she’s examining. Occasionally, she even trusts you with a small knife, and you dice what looks like diseased plant pieces and put them on microscope slides. She never bothers to explain what she’s working towards, and you’re not getting paid to ask questions.

It’s kind of a soap-bubble existence.

That being said, you don’t expect it to pop as it does.

“Hey, Doc, sorry I’m late. There was a guy with sonic weapons on my normal route, and my taxi had to—” You stutter to a halt, taking in the scene.

Normally, your employer is dressed to kill—business skirts, heels, the whole nine yards—but today she seems to be taking the saying a little more seriously.

“I’ll just...” You make a grab for the door handle, looking to make a speedy exit.

A vine darts out to cinch your arms to your waist. You suck in a shallow breath and wonder what it is about you and tentacle-like things lately. At least the vine doesn’t have suckers on it.

Wait—

“Now this is unfortunate,” Poison Ivy née Paula Irving says, shattering your thoughts. She glides closer, plants blooming in her wake. You feel like you’re looking at some carnal painting of Eve, all leaves and bare skin. “I had hoped to avoid complications like this. Keep my work and home life separate, if you will.”

You knew this job was too good to be true. Science credits and competitive pay? You should have just taken out a loan.

“Look, I won’t tell anyone—” you say, the words tumbling out before you can catch them. You really don’t want to find out what it feels like to have vines grow up your sinus cavities and into your brain.

“Of course not, sweet thing.” The woman has a smile as poisonous as her name. She strokes a hand down your face. “We’re going to make sure of it.”

The puff of pollen isn’t what you’re expecting. You sneeze, once.

Then things get a little… hazy.

“Now we have a lot to do today, and I’m going to need you to be a very good helper.”

You find yourself nodding. You can be a good helper. You can be a great helper.

Something soft pats your cheek. “That’s what I like to hear.”

There’s something wrong.

Dr. Irv—Pam—seems unfazed, and she would know—she knows everything—but there’s still… something. You pause in your fiddling with a line of heating concoctions, head spinning. It’s like a ringing in your ears. Like a ringing in your whole head.

“Don’t let that extract burn,” Pam says sharply, and the moment is lost.

You adjust the temperature, happy to be of help.

You’re not sure how long you’ve been here, but it’s not important. Pam says you’re close—so close—to completion, and it would be a shame to stop now.

You agree. Why leave when you could be here, helping?

Some distant message in your brain pings, but you send it straight to voicemail. You have the brief thought that maybe you should sit down, but there are no chairs here, and you can’t just leave. Pam says you should stay in this room, and that seems reasonable. There’s too much to do.

Something pings again, and this time it’s not in your head.

“Be a dear and turn off your phone, would you? It’s bad lab manners,” Pam says. She doesn’t look up from her slides.

You float over to your shoulder bag, feeling mortified. You didn’t turn off your phone! Pam must think you’re so rude. Maybe you should throw your phone in the garbage.

Yeah, that seems like the best course of action.

You reach for the power button, but the screen lights up again, another message coming in. You blink. There are… a lot of missed messages. That seems important, somehow.

“Something wrong?” Pam asks, suddenly beside you.

You start, and the screen goes black. You stare at the dark shape for a handful of seconds, unseeing, before giving a shrug and tossing it into the waste bin.

“It’s not important,” you say, smiling up at the woman.

“Hm.” She peers into your eyes for a moment, and you smell something cloying, like roses and overripe fruit, before she turns away. You waver in place, the ground bucking beneath you.

It’s not importa—

You’re happy to hel—

You pitch forward, losing the battle with your own equilibrium.

Something warm catches you around your waste.

“Easy there,” a vaguely familiar voice says in your ear.

The room around you shifts again. You feel like you should tell someone that you’re feeling a little under the weather, but your tongue grew wings and flew away, and you’re not sure about the state of your vocal cords. There’s suddenly a lot more green in your field of vision, and that seems cheerful.

“I can’t say I’m glad to see you, little bird.”

Oh, but Pam doesn’t seem to be cheerful at all. Your fingers twitch in sympathy. You can’t seem to manage much more than that.

“”Little” from whose perspective, Doctor Irving?”

No one seems very happy, actually. Such a shame, because other than your general inability to do anything, you feel great.

“I’m surprised it took you so long, honestly,” Pam says. “I thought one of your kind would come flying in here half-cocked weeks ago.”

There’s some maneuvering, and you’re lifted so that Pam is no longer in your line of sight—you’d frown if you still had lips, but you think they hitched a ride with your tongue—and you are instead looking up at a man in a mask.

Or, more specifically, you’re looking up at a masked man’s jaw and mouth.

“’ey,” you slur.

Blue eyes blink down at you, momentarily distracted. “What did you do?”

You’re not sure what he means. You’ve only been helping; he doesn’t have to sound so harsh—

“Just a little plant coercion,” Pam says airily. “Nothing permanent, if you’re so concerned.”

Oh. No one��s angry at you. That’s good.

The lips continue to frown. The shape of them is familiar, and you feel like you’ve thought about them before. At length.

“Dick,” you say muzzily.

The look now aimed at you is one of alarm.

“Are you kidding me?” your sort-of boyfriend hisses through his teeth.

You wonder why he’s wearing the mask. You like his face. It’s a good face.

Some of that thought must find its way out of your mouth, because there's a shushing noise—rude—and suddenly you’re in motion.

“Don’t think you’re getting away with this, Ivy,” Dick throws over his shoulder.

There’s a feminine scoff behind him. “You think you can just come and go as you please, don’t you? Men.”

Your free ride gets a lot rougher when vines start snapping toward Dick’s feet. He dashes out of the lab, dodging encroaching flora, and you resolve to close your eyes and hope for the best. You’re sad that Pam’s upset, but Dick is here now, and you really like Dick.

“I r’ly li’e you,” you say, because it’s important that he knows.

“Your timing,” Dick pants, tucking you in closer, “leaves something to be desired.”

“Mm.” You’d say more—something about his mouth, maybe—but something is tugging you down, down, down into darkness, and you see no reason to resist.

Dick will keep you safe.

“—orked for Poison Ivy for months without suspecting her, and I show up and get pegged in minutes. Even after the drugs!”

You’re not sure what death feels like, but you think you might be experiencing it.

“Eugh,” you can’t help but groan when you go to scrape your eyelids open. Too bright.

There’s the sound of footsteps and a hand on your forehead.

“Hey, take it easy, you’ve been out for a while.”

“Dick?” you ask, eyes still firmly winched shut. Your mind’s all jumbled, and your sinuses feel like they’ve been hit with spring allergies.

There’s a pregnant pause.

“…Yeah. About that.”

You crack an eye open.

“Oh,” you say, mouth dry for a whole host of reasons. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Nightwing says with a wry grin. “We have a lot to talk about.”

The coffee shop is sunny today, and you have a disposition to match.

“Well someone looks chipper,” Dick says when you come strolling in, grin wide enough to split your face. “The interview went well, I assume?”

You bend and smack a kiss against his cheek, but when you go to take your seat, he snags an arm around you and reels you back in for a proper greeting.

“Mm,” you breathe against his mouth. “So good.”

“I know I am.” He winks and lets you go.

You roll your eyes. “I meant the interview, you doof. I swear, if your ego gets any bigger, we’ll have to roll it behind you in a wheelbarrow.”

His ankles stretch out to link around one of your own. His smile is entirely unapologetic.

“So, you got the job?”

“Dick, your dad runs the company. Of course I got the job.”

“Nah, he didn’t have to pull any strings for this. You did it all on your own.”

You have to look down to avoid the warm look in his eyes. You might be blushing.

“Wanna celebrate tonight? My treat.” He waggles his eyebrows invitingly, as if you need coercing to accept the offer.

“Sure you don’t have any other dates tonight? Any eldtritch creatures you wanna get real personal with?”

Dick groans. “You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“I could be convinced to drop that particular instance. That I was so callously and impersonally seduced to out a super villain?” You give a haughty sniff and flip your hand in a so-so gesture. “Jury’s still out.”

Dick grabs your wavering hand and rubs his thumb over your knuckles. “I’m sorry it’s such an imposition for you.”

“Every day I suffer.”

He laughs, then. “Free up your schedule tonight,” he says, leaning in. “I’ll make it up to you.

The way his voice drops at the last has you shivering.

“I’ll… make some adjustments,” you say.

Gotham may be a hurricane, but you’re feeling weatherproof today.

#baby's first dc fic #dick grayson/reader #fanfiction #dick grayson #poison ivy #vaguely based on gotham city sirens stuff #batman fanfic #dcu #my writing #runmild writes #reader fic #dick grayson x reader

29 notes · View notes

zofias · 7 years

Text

tod spoliers

ever since i finished tower of dawn i’ve been wanting to write down my thoughts about it so here goes nothing lmao feel free to ignore this

ok so tod started off pretty nicely sjm laid out the southern continent very descriptively and i was thoroughly invested bc well i was totally excited to read tod from the start and when i finally got my hands on it i was ready but not ready lol my emotions about it are just all over the place basically

anyways i really enjoyed the aspects of the southern continent and the history of it the story of the khagans and how they are chosen was interesting the whole khagan gets to choose which child he/she wants as his/her heir was smth i got truly interested in bc its always the first born child who gets to take the crown or w/e so that was a nice change and the siblings that were introduced in tod were all dissimilar they all had such strengths to be heirs since they all specialized/lead different things like hasar had armadas and lead them sartaq had his aerial army kashin was a solider and controlled the armies on land arghun had his network of spies like i enjoyed that they all were individually so powerful i guess like thru each chapter you’d think the khagan would choose a different sibling but i was really happy that sartaq was chosen tho i did kinda feel like he would end up being heir like it became a bit obvious bc he seemed to be the one who took a stand and was like imma leave if you dont help aelin and co.

ok lets move onto yrene towers at first i didnt know how to feel about her only bc we didnt get into her character as much yet but when she went to see chaol and nesryn for the first time i was literally laughing also idk why but the dynamic between her chaol in that first meeting made just go yup they gonna fall in love im a sucker for haters to lovers trope ok she literally despised him for a good few chapters lol yrene is freaking amazing and so badass her story was smth i really enjoyed i was really interested in her powers and all about the healers she wanted to make a difference and help her ppl and she got her wish in the end what was really cool about her was that she taught young ppl self defense even tho she knew not so much she wanted to give those girls a change to fight back and when the torre was attacked she knew how frightened that made them and made chaol come teach bc he’d be a good distraction from all the horrors i just really loved the way her mind works she was invested in the art of healing so thoroughly and yrene never backed down she was so determined to find answers like i loved her so much she was amazing slm may have faults but the way she writes female characters is really empowering LISTEN I NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW YRENE PUSHED HASAR INTO THE WATER i legit started laughing so hard like i needed that it was so good yrene is everything if you dont want to read this book bc of chaol read for yrene ok that’s all im going to say yrene was wonderful

chaol westfall my first thought about him was ‘my baby i hope you heal and get to fight again’ like reading about how much he didnt like it in his chair was really sad i mean i get it chaol was always really determined and he like being ready to fight and then he lost movement in his legs and his world turned upside down like when yrene was healing him and he was feeling all the darkness and remembering what his father did to him when i read that his father literally pushed/threw him out of the house made me tear up chaol hit his head hard and the son of a bitch father didnt even let chaol’s mother come to him and terrin saw and chaol felt guilty for leaving him i just was so hurt reading that and also few guards helped him leave anielle and his damn father banished them to the mountains like i hated chaol’s father and now i just cant the darkness chaol had in him was so much did he hate himself? i think so but he was so angry and things were haunting him it just made my heart hurt i loved tower of dawn bc we got to see everything about chaol what he felt what he realized it was really good throughout he kept thinking about dorian and always was so loyal to him i love it when they reunite i need sjm to have them hug for a good hour or more tbh like its needed what also made my heart shatter was what he felt for aelin in his darkness you can see how he loved her and his hate for her too like i dont know how to explain it it made me feel idk his darkness was terrible and at some parts i had to put the book down to stop feeling too much idk chaol has gone through so much and it was nice to see what he felt he conquered his darkness and realized and accepted himself his journey was rough but he found himself i was so excited to read this book only bc of him he has always been one of my fav book characters and this made me love him so much more

CHAROENE???? i dont know chaol and yrene’s shipname but imma tell you i love them together their dynamic was wonderful they slowly became friends and trusted one another they had to somewhat quickly open up to one another bc it was the only way chaol was going to heal physically and emotionally i enjoyed seeing how they developed their relationship it was nice chaol deserved to love someone who cared for him so much my favorite part was when they got into a fight and yrene was walking away and chaol wanted to go after so he willed himself to walk ever so slightly and as he was somewhat getting closer to yrene she began teasing him and moving away to make him walk more it was so cute i liked their relationship a lot they both felt equally comfortable to talk to one another and it was like a balance you know what actually my fav part was their day out in the city when they just rode horses and yrene was healing ppl it was sweet and calm and when they went out to eat just the two of them with no agenda they both deserved smth like that i loved it ik most ppl are going to say sjm wanted to just pair everyone off with a love interest but i love these two it was unexpected esp the fact that they are linked to each other and they’re married!! but i love it im a sucker for that bond stuff ok this relationship made me love tod so much

nesryn faliq when she was first introduced in queen of shadows i was 50/50 on how i felt about her like i liked her but also somewhat didnt but let me tell you tod made me love her chaol was an idiot for using her as he did and she realized it and it seemed she was ok with it but i loved that she got to have her adventure i loved that she got to return to home and see her family she got to explore the lands of antica with sartaq and kadara what made me like her more was that she was didnt let opportunities pass her by she decided to go with sartaq and find her adventure on her own tho i did sort of predict that her and sartaq were going to become a thing after their little flight on kadara in the beginning idk it just seemed like they would be a thing which they did but i liked it she deserved someone like sartaq there was a lot of mutual respect in their relationship which i admired i loved that thru nesryn we got to learn more about antica and the history and everything like its her home and we got to see what she felt and loved about it that was my favorite thing i also loved that she got her own ruk!! AND NESRYN CAN SING that was so amazing like it adds so much more to her i love her

a few other things one FUCKING MAEVE IS A VALG QUEEN I HATE HER like that made me so mad and now i want to know how everyone will react to this and what they will do i hope aelin NO ROWAN RIPS HER TO SHREDS another thing lysandra and falkan being her uncle was amazing i loved that we got to learn somewhat as to how lysandra got her powers butterfly the horse made this book a million times better again yrene pushing hasar into the water was hilarious hasar deserved it lmao i really wished someone did smth like to arghun kadara deserves appreciation for being an awesome ruk when she got trapped in the spiderweb i was a wreck also again MAEVE IS A VALG QUEEN what on earth and duva being possessed by valg and throwing her younger sister off a balcony i cried and duva was pregnant that was just so sad im so happy that yrene saved her life im happy that one else died i mean chaol came close obviously again and yrene and him are now linked which is cool but also like terribly dangerous i want to see what sjm is going to do with that the healers were so cool i loved reading about the torre and the origins and everything i hope we get to see more about them yrene is bringing hundreds of them with her so it could be a possibility there was just so much going on in this book lmao

i know i just hit the surface with a lot of this but i really wanted to get my view on the three mains out chaol yrene and nesryn are amazing and you know what i loved that this book was about them finding out where they fit into this war thats booming chaol was uncertain and felt he had nothing to offer bc he was injured but realized that the chair wasnt limiting him but he himself was nesryn found that she can be her own adventure she found that her home country was her place yrene discovered that her powers could save people who are possessed by the valg and that was epic i loved that this book was more about all these characters discovering who they are rather than anything else i loved it so much i was so excited for it and it didnt disappoint me

if you read my stupid rambling i am so grateful for you haha thank you if you want to leave your opinion go right ahead whether it agrees with mine or not im up for anything lmao also there are probably so many spelling errors im so sorry lol

~EDIT~ UM I FORGOT TO ADD ABOUT THE FIREHEART CHAPTER I COULDNT HANDLE IT IT RUINED ME OK IM JUST NOT OK AND THE FACT THAT MAEVE HAS AND MAEVE IS VALG MAKES EVERYTHING WORSE I JUST THIS IS TERRIFYING AELIN BETTER BE OKAY I NEED HER TO BE OKAY!!!

#text #this has heavy spoilers in it #heads up before u dive in lol or not thats cool #tod spoilers #tower of dawn #chaol westfall #nesryn faliq #yrene towers #THIS IS SO LONG IDK HOW THAT HAPPENED #AGAIN HEAVY SPOILERS

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zeldahijinks · 7 years

Text

Flock Together

Part 5

[Previous Chapter] [Next Chapter] Revali/Reader Summary: Revali and Reader do a bit of sparring that causes a new step in their relationship. Word count: 2495 [A03] to reader full story

“So? How do you like it?”

Revali looked himself over, analyzing the fit of his new warrior’s outfit. You stood off to the side of the clothing shop, inwardly feeling pretty proud and slightly giddy seeing how well it fit him. The pauldrons fanned out giving him a rather dramatic silhouette and the crimson top popped against his dark navy blue feathers. He looked handsome, but you felt like keeping that to yourself. Least you inflate his ego even more.

He hummed thoughtfully as he gazed at himself in the mirror. “The pteruges is a tad short if you ask me..” He began to mumbled, his eyes peering off to the side to stare at you. He saw the tilt of your head and the crease in your forehead causing his throat clamp slightly. He cleared his throat, “But perhaps this will allow me to have more mobility. Afterall, I cannot be restricted.”

You had to force yourself not to roll your eyes at his obvious recovery, but you humored him nonetheless. The designer of the outfit was at Revali’s knees, checking that every seams and welding was at its perfected state before looking at Revali with a gleam, “I have to say this is my finest work yet!”

The Rito Champion gave a side glance towards the designer while he fixed his champion’s cloak around his neck. Absentmindedly, Revali mutters, “Looking nice and actually holding up are two different things, but yes, it is a grand gesture you did your best.”

You could only smack your forehead at his rude reply and you slid over to jab your elbow in his side. He glared before rubbing his sore spot and you only gave him a stern look in return. You turned to the designer and held out your hand for him to shake. “You did a marvelous job, and I am sure that the durability matches its strong design.”

The designer absolutely glowed and held opened his doorway for you. “It was a pleasure! Especially with such a generous amount you pro-”

You shushed him as quickly as you could, still feeling self conscious that the diamonds you took from the mines were a sensitive subject between you and Revali. You didn’t dare look back at Revali’s face, and honestly, you did feel silly. Revali is wearing the armor you had custom made for him, so he is not ignorant enough to think you could just randomly afford it. The incident in the mines, however, had caused you to walk on eggshells, afraid that you two will have another spiral in your...relationship? You supposed you could call it that, but it didn’t feel like a legitimate relationship.

Well, warriors and possibly friend relationship, yes, but anything more than that? You really had to wonder.

Revali and you made your way out of the shop and gave one last thank you before heading out to the fields. The only way to know if the armor could hold up was testing it out and so you were more than willing to spar with him, but the only problem was getting him to agree where to spar.

“Vah Medoh is a fine place for training!” Revali countered the heated argument that had conspired between you two while walking.

“Have you ever thought that it’s because you can fly if you fall off? And getting there is no easy task for me.”

He could only roll his eyes, his voice on the verge of irritation, “What are you blabbering on about? Having me take you is the safest transport you can get in all of land of Hyrule.”

“My heart bursting through my chest and winds knocking me around is not what I consider ‘safe’.”

“There are sacrifices you have to make for such travels.”

“Yeah, well, there are other ways to travels. It’s called feet.”

“‘Walking’ would have been more effective rebuttal.”

“Breaking my foot off in your ass is also an effective rebuttal.”

Revali scoffed, shaking his head as you two walked over a narrow wooden bridge. He leered at you in a smug fashion, and tilted his head to the side as he leaned closer to you. “You are wonderful at making empty threats, but can you prov- OMPH! [Name]! That was uncalled for!”

You gave him a cheeky grin as you brought your foot back from his tail feathers. “You callin’ me out, I have to bring the thunder.”

Revali spoke in a dry tone with an equally dead face, “Hilarious.” He leaned in closer and you became all too aware of the smell of his new leather, “ And this coming from the person who is terrified of thunder.”

You cringed, feeling your cheeks warm as you took a step back, “I am not!” Your voice squeaked, ruining any threatening air you had, “ Them fighting words, Revali.”

He took a step closer to you and peered deep within your eyes. His voice was low and rumbled in your eardrums, “Yes, they are. Care to take on the challenge?”

Normally, you would have shivered, but he was provoking you. So, you gave a smirk and pulled your sword from its scabbard, and held the point to his chest. Revali looked you over with a calm expression as he sized up your sword and how quickly your drew it.

“You wish to fight here?” He asked smoothly, feeling his adrenaline gear up as you shifted your weight and changed your defensive stance.

“No more words, chatty!” Exhilaration was flowing through your veins. It had been quite a while since you had a good fight and you were more than willing to give Revali a run for his rupees. You leapt towards him and you could see an air of confidence radiating from him.

“Attacking from the front is an amateur mo-” You cut him off by leaping over his head and right behind him. As he turned around you rolled to the side, kicking his feet out from under him. Revali lost his balance but quickly used his gale to shoot himself in to the sky. When he gained level air, he fell backwards until he nose dived for you. Excitement tingled throughout your arms and turned your stomach in ways you often relished in. You were prepared for him and ready to jump out of his aerial attack when he turned at the last moment and your sword swipe completely missed him.

The gust of wind that trailed behind him blew against you harshly causing you to cover your eyes from the flying dirt. You could hear him chuckle a distance away and honed in on the sound of his flapping to figure out where he was coming from while you regained your sight.

However, it seemed that Revali was quite aware of what you were waiting for and the sound of flapping came to a halt. You forced an eye open, struggling to see through the blurry world and the pain. You blinked a couple of times and when your vision finally cleared somewhat Revali was lunging right for you with his bow drawn. A surprised yelp fell from your throat and you dodge to the side roughly, narrowing missing an arrow.

You rolled until you were able to safely get up without his barrage of arrows, and you flung your sword towards him. He went to fly upwards, but the hilt of the sword jabbed right at his knee causing his nerve to fray and fell to the ground for split moment, losing his bow in the process. You took the opportunity and leapt for him once more but Revali darted to the side as your heel swung down. Pain shot through your leg as you fell to the side clutching your nerved wrecked foot.

“Good grief, aiming to take my head?”

A soft chortle escaped you as your pain ridden leg lessened. Taking a moment to compose yourselves, you got to your feet, turning around and wiped the sweat off your forehead. “Oh, I’m sorry, next time I won’t miss.” You teased causing a smirk to adorn his face.

He stood up and patted himself free of dirt, “Riveting, surely. You compose yourself well, especially after you were groveling on the ground just a moment ago.”

You clicked your tongue and shook your head. “Tsk, flattering me isn’t going to help you win!”

You took an offensive stance, kicking your sword up into your hand. With sword raised above your head and pointing towards him, Revali took a defensive stance trying to keep his eyes on you, but also where his bow went. Given that he was defenseless you sped off to the side and used the momentum to jump off a boulder to strike him from the air. But he had plenty of time to take in your attack plan and stepped to the side in a nonchalant manner. Your sword penetrated the ground and you struggled lifting it from its prison. You felt his presence come up behind you and your flipped around to jab him in the face with your elbow.

He caught it with ease just mere inches from his beak. Revali peered down at you with a smug mirth and blocked your on coming sucker punch with ease. It caused your arms to twist to which he took the advantage of, and spun your body around until your back hit his front. He locked your arms in front of you, holding onto your wrists. You struggled, flinging your body left to right all the while ignoring his chuckles.

“I dare say, [Name], you’ve been ensnared.” His voice vibrated in your ear and you could not shake the wave of tickling pleasure coursing through your body. However, your pride was burning being caught so easily and his own ego was frustrating you. With a sudden burst of adrenaline you flung upper half forward causing Revali’s body to fly over you.

It did not go smoothly as you hope as your head clunked against the ground. Revali skidded just a few inches before he pulled himself up from the ground and looked over his shoulder. You were clutching the top of your head while seething in agony and disoriented. You attempted to sit up, but immediately regretted the action as your world spun and felt yourself fall back.

Expecting to hit the ground, you felt something catch you in the midst of your descent, and although you wanted to look the throbbing pain prevented you.

You felt feather like touches wisping across your temple and finally peeking an eye open, your vision melded the split image of Revali together. He looked terribly concerned and brushed dirt off your face. He clicked his tongue once he realized that you were able to focus on him and for some reason the action caused you to chuckle. Revali had to prevent a chuckle escaping him as well, but before either of you knew it, the two of you were laughing hysterically. You felt so foolish, but it was the most fun you had, and Revali had a hard time believing your sparring session came to end like that. The laughter waned after a few moments, but the reminisce of your soft chuckles remained.

Revali felt himself relaxed, “Have to have the last action in anything and look where it got you.” He sighed dramatically, “Well, I hope that welt on your head taught you that was a poor move.”

You could only give him pout and a tiny glare, “Well, it worked, didn’t it? Next time I’ll execute it better.”

He couldn’t stop the short laugh that burst from his beak, “If that is your final move, I fear for us all.” Revali patted the last remains of dirt on your shoulders before he used his legs to lift himself up. You were about to make your way on your own feet when his wing came into your view. You paused, taking a moment to stare him in the eyes before taking his wing in your hand. He pulled you up with ease, but your vertigo had been thrown off making you fall forward. A tad embarrassed, you pulled yourself from Revali’s chest, and looked back at him. The look in his eye was filled with intense emotions you couldn’t decipher and felt locked in his gaze for what felt like heavenly eternity.

It was only when you heard birds chirping, did either of your pulled from the hypnotic stare off. The two of you moved an arm's distance away and took the time to dust yourselves off. You coughed, feeling your cheeks a bit warm and peered over to Revali. The feathers on his neck and collarbone fluffed up a little. It made you feel slightly better knowing he was just as flustered as you.

You turned towards him and gave him a once over before you hummed in thought. “What a shame, I don’t think I landed a single scratch on you.”

The sudden praised caused Revali to straighten his back and raise his beak to the air. “Let that comfort you at night, my dear [Name]. Rest at ease, I will be sure to vanquish Ganon.”

“Oh, I’ll be sure to think of it like counting sheep.” You replied dully and crossed your arms. The top of your head slightly throbbed and as you looked around, you realized you two sparred just at the entrance of the Rito village. You rubbed your upper arm and began to make your way back. “Uhh, well, if we’re done here maybe we should go freshen up..”

Revali looked himself over and sighed reluctantly, “That would be for the best. We look like a couple of wrung out rats.”

You laughed lightly in response and went to make your way back to the Inn when Revali called out for you. Curious, you turned around and saw him looking anywhere but you.

“P-perhaps, if it’s not too much of a inconvenience...You would want to have dinner with me tonight?” He made eye contact and although his voice had an underlying tone of nervousness, he held confidence in his stance.

It felt ridiculous how long it took your brain to process that Revali was inviting you out for dinner. However, once you realized you felt a jolt of anxiety burst through you body. Wait, what does this mean, you questioned to yourself and felt yourself fidgeting. Revali began to feel uneasy as he waited for your response and began to feel that perhaps he made his move too soon. He was about to open his beak to tell you ‘nevermind’, when your voice, uncharacteristically meek, spoke,

“W-where’d you like to go?”

Revali had never felt a wave of relief and serenity like he did in this moment. He took a few steps to be at your side and gave a soft smile. “Anywhere that sounds good to you. My treat.”

#Revali #revali x reader #flock together #flock together part 5 #hijink's wriiting #long post #YEAHHHHHHHHH #SO HAPPY #hope you like~!

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junker-town · 6 years

Text

I tried to eat every hot dog at the NBA All-Star Game and lived to tell the tale

Why would you eat all the hot dogs at Staples Center? ...Why not?

Attending the NBA All-Star Game for the first time, I thought to myself: “Is there anything at the actual event that I can be the All-Star of?” Being a bigger dude, the easy answer was eating a bunch of foods at sporting events. Specifically, hot dogs.

Luckily for me, Staples Center offers a variety of dogs. Some are simple — just a plain ol’ dog with relish and mustard — and others are the equivalent of a small Thanksgiving dinner packed into a bun. So I decided to eat them. All of them.

Let’s get started, shall we?

1. Duck and Bacon Jalapeńo Sausage — Wurstküche

Sweet peppers, grilled onions, and whole grain mustard

Any hip 20-something Angeleno has taken a trip to Wurstküche. It’s a restaurant located downtown and it has a great selection of beers and exotic sausages. You can order a rattlesnake, rabbit, and jalapeńo hot dog to go along with your pint of Schneider Edel Weisse.

This pop-up located in Staples Center didn’t have the range of exotic sausages. In fact, their entire food menu is two hot dogs. One of which is the duck, bacon, and jalapeńo.

This looks fake healthy. I can do this, though there is a lot of bread which I fear is what will eventually do me in during this marathon. The peppers and onions look delicious, but the sausage itself looks gray, like it’s telling me not to eat it. But I’m not a sucker.

I liked the peppers more than the sausage, to be honest. Like, I could eat a hot dog of just those peppers. (Are spicy peppers inside a bun technically a hot dog? You know what, never mind). This also might be because at the end of the hot dog, I was left with just bun and peppers.

2. Mac N’Cheese Dog — Dave’s Doghouse

Three cheese mac, bacon bits, old fashioned yellow mustard

This hot dog is way smaller than the first, but I’m already hesitant to take a first bite. Mac and cheese is heavy as a side dish. Bacon is also heavy as hell. Combining all of them into one dog is just a testament to mankind’s desire to test the limits of how sluggish someone can feel after a meal.

There’s a dense amount of mac and cheese on the hot dog itself, so much that I could barely see the actual dog. From an aerial view it’s just bacon chunks and mac and cheese. I’m not complaining though.

One bite in and I can already envision a lot of heavy breathing. I feel like i just ate a really hearty dinner. The sausage itself is more traditional than duck and bacon, which I appreciate. Everything else is doing the heavy lifting. And I am just heavy at this point.

3. California Dog — Dave’s Doghouse

Josiah’s signature all beef chili, onions, old fashioned yellow mustard

hahahaha I thought the mac and cheese hot dog was going to be the challenge. This hot dog is straight up insulting me now. I can see why they call it a California Dog. The smell of it reminds me of a Original Tommy’s chili cheeseburger which doesn’t get any more Californian unless you’re hanging out in traffic on a freeway near a beach.

I’ve been staring at this hot dog for way too long and haven’t taken a bit out of it.

The chili in this is really good and the onions don’t overshadow anything. After I finished it, I felt both proud and ashamed of myself. This must be what it feels like to be the world’s most crafty thief.

Intermission: Churros

I took a break from devouring another hot dog to eat two churros. I was expecting a lot of crunch but this wonderful desert just dissolved in my mouth like a cloud. It’s the lightest thing i’ve eaten (not sure if that’s a good thing or not), and it’s a well-needed break.

The second churro tasted as though someone removed my taste buds, placed them inside a transparent box, and then proceeded fill the box with a ton of glitter for an Instagram boomerang. It was a lot of sugar. Time to keep eating hot dogs.

4. Dave’s Dog — Dave’s Doghouse

Sweet relish, onions, old fashioned yellow mustard

Just when I thought I hit a wall, this hot dog enters my life. As opposed to the other ridiculously gluttonous Dave’s doghouse items, this one seems like just any ol’ hot dog, which I appreciate. I actually took the time to enjoy this one. This was a lot like the regular hot dogs that the Staples Center concessions offer, just smaller.

5. Poblano Chorizo Mac & Cheese Dog — Dave’s Doghouse

I had to take a few trips to order all these hot dogs, and for some reason I didn’t see this particular hot dog until the penultimate trip. I had already eaten one hot dog with mac and cheese and now I have to eat another? And this dog is chorizo?!

Thankfully, this one was actually really good. So good, that I didn’t care about anything other than the contrast of creaminess from the mac and spice from the chorizo.

6. Classic Dog — Dave’s Doghouse

Onion, sauerkraut, old fashioned yellow mustard

This one was fine.

7. Skyscraper Dog — EATS

Yellow mustard, relish, onions

For what it’s worth, EATS offers two hot dogs. One is a called a downtown dog. It’s a plain hot dog. The skyscraper dog, the one I bought, is also a plain hot dog, just in a bigger size. I was looking forward to this hot dog from the very beginning because it’s a quintessential sporting event meal. It doesn't look as appetizing as all the others but it’s the most recognizable — in looks and in taste — of the bunch.

I enjoyed it, thought not as much as I had hoped since I was full at this point in the evening.

8. Artisan Bratwurst — Wurstküche

Bratwurst: fine cuts of pork, coriander & nutmeg. Topped off with sweet peppers, grilled onions, and whole grain mustard

It’s the fourth quarter and I can’t feel my face.

The employees of Dave’s Doghouse wear shirts with an anthropomorphic hot dog named The Dogfather. I think The Dogfather put a hit out on me.

I stared at this hot dog for a good portion of the fourth quarter. There’s a lot of flavor in this brat and the combination of the sausage, peppers, onions, and all that bread made it really difficult to eat. But just when Team LeBron and Team Stephen got serious late in the game, so did I. I was going to eat this hot dog and walk out of Staples Center a concessions champion.

I finished it! And the ending to the All-Star Game got me so pumped that I could barely remember that I had just eaten eight hot dogs. Or maybe it was the fact that I had just devoured eight dogs that made me forgetful. Regardless, I still had one final mission: to go outside and find a hot dog vendor right outside Staples Center.

I didn’t expect it, but there was one problem as I stepped out: it was raining.

It wasn’t raining hard, but the slight drizzle made it hard to find anyone outside, and this was just after the game had ended. Everyone already found their cars and were headed home. I walked a few blocks and found nothing.

But just as I was about to give up, I found one stand preparing to close up shop.

9. Hot dog — parking lot across the street from Staples Center

Bacon-wrapped hot dog, mustard, mayonnaise, ketchup, pico del gallo, guacamole, sliced pickled jalapeños, and a roasted whole jalapeño on the side

Even before I ate the eight other hot dogs, I knew this one would be crowned the best. There’s no better hot dog in Los Angeles than one sold in a cart outside your favorite arena or club. If you’ve had a few drinks earlier in the evening, this dog will be your saving grace.

It’s the perfect mess of a meal.

Also, the person who made the hot dog was so nice, he saw how happy I was eating the hot dog by his cart that he took a photo of me and then showed it to me on his phone. I’d like to think he knew that I was on the tail end of an excruciatingly delicious trek. The hot dog gods brought him along to say, “good job, Hector, and good night.”

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