#i am a lil rusty with graphic making so this is bad BUT i still wanted to post it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thejrock88-blog · 5 years

Text

8 DISCUSSION POST

Shrek discussion post

First off Shrek is one of my favorite movies of all times from DreamWorks. In class, I didn’t know that Shrek was a book and was later made into a movie in. What was interesting to me that I learned in class was that the meaning of” Shrek” (in Yiddish) meant “Fear/fright” was a post-modern parody (making fun of Disney). Anywho this movie is beyond funny I didn’t understand the jokes when I was a kid but best believe I did catch them in movie night. My all-time favorite movie parts of the movie, of course, are the intro to the movie it’s a classic it makes fun of the classic Disney “intro” with the storybook and the “once upon” theme but instead, he rips out a page in the book and starts laughing. The next scene that tickled me is when Lord Farquaad wants to find a wife and he has the talking mirror, that scene reminded me of the price is right and(copies snow white with the mirror) he has the chance to pick from three of the Disney princesses and what gets every time is when he asked the mirror “mirror mirror on the wall is this, not the most perfect kingdom of them all? “uhhhh Thelonious ““punches the mirror (lmfaooo I always die because of this scene I don’t know why it’s just super funny. Lastly, when Princess Fiona has her kick-ass scene (Disney would never OK!) that scene sticks out like a glove because never in a million years do you ever see a princess beat up men in the woods. (THANKS FOR LISTENING TO MY TED TALK ENJOY)

HARRY POTTER THE SORCERER’S STONE DISCUSSION POST

I just want to say that Harry had the “Hard knock life “(WIZARD EDITION”) the intro was mad dramatic (shows wizard tricks oweeee). SIDEBAR (I didn’t even know that a woman (J.K Rowling) made the Harry Potter’s series that’s super cool. Back to my discussion out of all places why would they put them with this sick ass family (which unfortunately relate to him) honestly I feel like they were so salty cause they were regular ass hell no powers no wizard cool stuff just a basic muggle family. Just imagine having no powers what so ever at the family functions (sad asf wouldn’t even attend). The whole “child slave was a big NO! Child abuse at its finest he couldn't even sleep with his fat spoiled cousin (he really sleeping in that small corner wowwwww of the house like a dog) who is annoying big ass baby. I was happy when Harry found his gang gang. Nobody is going to address this well I am Ron Weasley was THE BEYONCE OF THE GROUP I SAID WHAT I SAID. Let me elaborate on what I mean by Ron is funny asf he doesn’t try hard to be funny because he is naturally funny, Ron sticks out (looks wise he’s a redhead I think redheads are cool like hello you have red hair you’re not basic). He brings the flair to the group because Harry has a lot on his plate and on the other hand, you have Hermione the “goody to shoe” (save the good girl act for class sweetie loosen up) she can do no wrong all in all the trio balances out. What surprises me is the classic cliché that the hero gets the girl is a NO because Ron does and he’s the SIDEKICK (like I said he’s the Beyoncé hello we stan. (THANKS FOR LISTENING TO MY TED TALK ENJOY).

ACCOMPANIED BY WOLVES DISCUSSION POST

This by far is the most twisted and funny 80s scary thriller movie I ever saw never heard of it so I was a bit skeptical about this movie and I was interested. Listen WAS PURE COMEDY OK! I tried to take it seriously but me being me the movie was most definitely 80s MATERIAL. Let’s chat about the relationship with the wife and the husband (the wolf). My thing is my dude just walked out the house because his wolf homies were calling and he dead ass left his wife (for some year) didn’t even return in a week it was some YEARS. Boom sis had about 3 kids looking tired. Fast forward to that boy with the missing tooth. LMFAO I WANT TO HAVE THAT MUCH CONFIDENCE IN MY LIFE TO STUNT ON A GIRL WITH A MISSING FRONT TOOTH (takes some balls to do that). The grandma gave me creepy vibes when she said she deserves a kiss for telling her granddaughter a story (inserts a meme shocking confused face) uhhhhhhh ok (Jaquelin's voice). The way the wolf killed the granny was beyond dramatic (in a funny way). I’ll give granny props how she defended herself one good time. SIDEBAR the wolf was prissy he wasn't a rough wolf) anyways back to him killing her the fact that he knocks her head off CLEAN AND HER HEAD SHATTERED (IN SLOW-MO LMFAO) LIKE A PLATE took me off I couldn’t hold it in class. In conclusion, the best part of the movie was THE WOLF TRANSFORMATION very much 80s (thank god for growth in SPECIAL EFFECTS). The way he tore his face (taking 5 years later) was time-consuming and all the fake blood to make that scene scary SIDEBAR the wife could have run and defended herself I guess she was in shock lmfaoo lol ANYWAYS ( THANKS FOR LISTENING TO MY TED TALK) SIDEBAR 9THIS MOVIE MADE ME CRINGE A LOT.......

CRIMSON PEAK DISCUSSION POST

The crimson peak was by far the best adaption of Bluebeard (I SAID WHAT I SAID). Edith and her ruffles going to bed I know she was hot I don’t know if that was a trend back then but......KILL IT everybody who wore that ruffle drip needs to go to jail like you're literally going to bed in a whole outfit (I know y’ all was hot asf). Locke lol I mean Sir Thomas honestly his role in Marvel sticks to him I always see him as Locke in my head. Edith my good sis you were head over heels for this man. For what reason I have no clue but for you to get embarrassed at the party SIDEBAR (I was laughing at that scene she looked so hurt). OK let’s get to the elephants in the room 1. THE HOUSE before I get married or even go to a man’s house, I need to see how you are living PERIOD sis was oblivious and blind to the bullshit, BLOOD OOZING OUT THE WALLS RED FLAG the house was in the middle of Nowhere (reminds me of courage the cowardly dog) the house literally had a huge hole in the roof (like I said blind to the bullshit) everything was old, rusty, bloody tired, beat down, in disarray, (I guess the love was so strong she look past it LMFAO couldn’t be me). My thing was if the damn ghost wasn’t so ghostly and graphic, she would have caught on to the warning signs (but of course she didn’t). Next elephant INSIST like really your own brother I was SHOOK OK like Ewww sweetie lol your siblings are supposed to be UGLY to you in your eyes. Lastly, I love how (sarcastically speaking) she still loved him in the end when he literally made your life a living hell with the help of his nasty sister. I guess love wins in the end after all huh. (I would neverrrrr) Anyways (THANKS FOR LISTENING TO MY TED TALK)

Jane Eyre Discussion Post

Jane Eyre was the second-best adaption of Bluebeard even though it was a gothic romance it still had a hint of humor (which was funny asf) which I loved because men think they're so slick. Too bad Jane gets played in this movie (inserts tear emoji). Jane endures the same bs family abuse just like Harry Potter minus the wizard magic her situation was a bit more intense because she gets sent to a charter school and continues to get abused. SIDEBAR The opening scene where she gets knocked in her head was a bit hardcore for my eyeballs. SIDEBAR I’m tired of Mia Wasikowska playing these sad roles making her have the hard knock life but it fits her in a weird way I couldn’t imagine her playing a non “my life sucks type of movie or like a thriller mystery type” Anywhoooo SIDEBAR the fact that Jane was mad young and Rochester is old as dirt baffles me (they like them young back in the old days ) I guess age ant nothing but a number hummmm... uhhhh okay (Jaquelin's voice). Rochester refers to Janes as “fairy” “pale little elf “first off, I cringe (gag reflex sound ugghhh) I wouldn’t feel comfortable at all like CAN YOU NOT. The little French girl (Adele) that dance her heart out for Jane and the old lady looks unbothered from her performance took me out and singing at the same time in the movie I'm sorry but I died laughing watching that scene because The scene that puts he is icing on the cake is the wedding scene one her dress was ugly and she was too petite for that dress two the way Rochester wanted to marry her in a hurry took me out she’s literally out of breath with this vail on her face gasping for air THE WEDDING WAS RUSHED AND A DISASTER.

Beauty and the Beast Discussion Post

Beauty by far had the brains and the beauty out of all the classic Disney princesses. Beauty and the beast skip the intro with the cliché book once upon a time theme (THANK GOD). The only thing that sucks with Disney IS THE SINGING I skip through them (FAITHFULLY) I can live without the musicals. I love how beauty had her own mind in the movie in her town they thought she was “ODD” because she loved to read SIDEBAR lol, I never thought it was weird to have a brain and be smart (YIKESSS) Men valued no brains Beauty was beyond the standard girl back in those days anywhoooo also, I love how she wasn’t chasing after a man the men were chasing her but she was very much uninterested. I don’t know if anybody catch it or not but I did when the dad was on horseback and he had to decide which way to go left or right and one side was dark gloomy and spooky while the other one was a normal path SIDEBAR lmao the horse shook his head down like I know he going to pick the wrong way if only animals could talk, and of course he chooses the dark gloomy path people just want the hard life (insert shrug shoulders emoji). I don’t anybody else caught this, but Belle and the beast were coming through with the looks FOR DINNER in the castle (lmfaoo she had a whole outfit just for dinner and it was only them to eating) same for the beast he looks fresh.

Moulin Rouge Discussion Post

The show must go on! I was a bit confused about this movie because it was a mess a lot was going on at first, the first thing that pops into my head “Lady Marmalade” with Christina Aguilera, Lil Kim, Mya, and Pink. What stands out to me was the vivid colors the costumes and the famous soundtrack that was used in this film (which was bomb asf) what was so random to me was the “Green fairy part” she reminded me of a raunchy tinker bell (cringe) SIDEBAR fun fact Ozzy Osbourne is credited as the voice of the green fairy I thought that was cool I honestly don’t know what was the reason for that part to display how drunk they were from the absynthe SIDEBAR I was completely lost with this movie bare with me. It was never a dull moment in this movie LITERALLY, my favorite performance was “Diamonds are a Girl’s Best friend all eyes were on her (AS IT SHOULD BE WHEN YOU’RE THE STAR). SIDEBAR I don’t know why but Satine always remind me of Christina Aguilera. She had the crowd on their knees with the MONEY. During this performance I can see where the trouble starts to brew the MISCOMMUNICATION, Harold tried to “SECURE THE BAG” WITH THE DUKE while John whispering into Christian ear about meeting his dream girl Satine. The saddest part in the story was when we saw she was coughing up blood, passing out and she still chose to perform (THE SHOW MUST GO ON.)

HERCULES DISCUSSION POST

Truth be told I never really watch Hercules (yeah, I know I'm weird) I really didn’t care for Hercules I'm not a Disney fan, But I got the opportunity to see it in class and it was a decent movie all in all. Is it just me or Hercules FEET WAS HUGE like his body proportion didn’t equal out at all? The Hades in this movie is funny, sarcastic and NOT mean he was just a PG type of hades (LOL THAT WAS CUTE DISNEY TO WATER HIM DOWN TO DISNEY STANDARDS FOR THE KIDS). Hade was amusing to watch in the show when we get to see him. Another thing I noticed was the advertisement endorsement scene I instantly think of the crazy Shrek phase when Shrek was on everything at the grocery store. Dreamworks is really on Disney's necks the opening scene to Hercules had A GOSPEL SONG SUNG BY BLACK WOMEN (DISNEY WOULD NEVER). I’m pretty sure Disney was shook and most likely PUNCHING THE AIR (lol). When that scene came, of course, I had goosebumps the soul in their voice lifted the storyline to a thousand. The Mount Olympus scene tickled me when baby Hercules took Zeus lightning bolt and put it in his mouth and shock himself was funny to me as well. SIDEBAR when Hade's losses his shit is so funny to me it’s like I can relate to him more than any character on the movie he was my favorite. Honestly, his do boys need to quit they legit had one job and THEY FAILED.

1 note · View note