#i am a true simp | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tommydarlings · 2 years

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Okay guys I just came to the realization that I fell way to hard for this blonde good looking dude who looks like the king of basically everything with black hair and those horny making hip movements...

#lisa talks 🗣️#help me pls lol #austin butler #elvis presley #i am a true simp #simping rn

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applebottomclaudiajeans · 2 months

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Fiona Shaw: *grey hair, no makeup, wearing a men’s flannel shirt, smoking a joint and talking about ghosts*

Me:

#I am a simple woman with simple needs #emphasis on the ‘simp’#Fiona Shaw #true detective #night country

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bl0rbohandbag · 10 months

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MANIPULATE MANWHORE MANSPREAD

#one true dilf #not a Lilia simp but I am looking 👀 respectfully #he went from edgy militarist goth stud to a family friendly goth father figure #oh to be absolutely smothered by lilia’s war criminal thighs #twst spoilers #lilia vanrouge #twst #twst lilia #twisted wonderland #twst book 7 spoilers #twst chapter 7 spoilers #my posts

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deus-ex-mona · 11 days

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youtube

bae love 2: jurikou boogaloo

#they’re so whipped for each other m y g o s h good for you koudai #happy jurikou mv to the owners of the yujiro bar and the owners of the yujiro bar alone #their [redacted] anime twting is funny btw akechi and juri simping so true #hiding in the bathroom for this that was cute congrats jurikou #ok now back to work idw to work till 5am again lol #update: help i did end up working till 5 am. sads

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turnwashingtonsbaddies · 1 year

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john andre when he was being interrogated and held prisoner by ben tallmadge and alexander hamilton:

#turn amc #turn washington's spies #john andre #alexander hamilton #ben tallmadge #i am so funny #and this is so true #both of these men were literally andre simps #but like me too tho #amrev #turn: washington's spies

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merakiui · 1 year

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Your tags talking about being alone in the woods with jade made me think of this one thought I had bouncing around in my brain for a while. The thought of being alone with jade at night at the campsite you both put together, sitting by the campfire while drinking something he "borrowed" from the lounge stocks and getting buzzed from it. The innocent touches (which were really just him using the opportunity to getting ever so closer to you) slowly turn into him fucking you into the dirt while you're on your hands and knees.

Sorry if my utter depravity for the eel man bothered you. Your tags made me think of it and I had to let it out.

Omg yes... this is the dream. OTL getting drunk in the forest with Jade and then getting railed into the ground. <3

Imagine if the two of you aren't even that close to begin with. You're only staying in the forest to gather materials because you're partners for a project in Professor Crewel's class. But when Jade reveals a bottle of some pretty-looking liquid and tells you it's come right from the lounge's secret stocks, you have trouble denying him. Jade's good at making the worst ideas sound so pleasant, which is exactly how the two of you end up buzzed and whisper-giggling about the silliest of things around a crackling bonfire.

Alcohol always makes strangers seem so much more attractive, and the amber glow from the dancing flames highlights Jade's handsome features so nicely. You realize he's much closer than he was before, his shoulder practically touching yours as he leans in. Under normal circumstances, Jade would never be this intimate with someone he hardly knows, let alone the human Azul's tasked him with gathering information on (it's strictly business, or so he'll lie). But he can blame the alcohol for that come morning when the sun's risen and the fire is but mere ash and still-warm embers.

It's only natural that teasing, experimental touches will snowball into something more deliberate when inebriation guides you closer to lustful attraction. Wandering hands, fleeting smooches, the shedding of pesky clothes... You'll be on your knees before you know it, with your face pressed into your arms to muffle your moans, while Jade's pounding sloppily into you from behind, his hands gripping your hips so roughly his fingertips leave crescent-shaped indents in your skin. You'll spend a good portion of the night fucking in all sorts of positions, and come morning you'll wake in the tent, curled into each other like two perfect puzzle pieces.

There's a heavy silence that thickens in the air when both of you realize your proximity and slowly detach yourselves. You gather your clothes in awkward silence, dressing as quickly as possible alongside Jade. He tells you he's content with never speaking of what occurred if you are, and you agree immediately. What happens in the forest stays in the forest. You make this truce with a mouth full of granola and a mounting sense of embarrassment.

After taking the tent down, packing your supplies, and cleaning your area, you set off for NRC. Jade spies the bruising bite mark on your neck, just slightly higher than the collar of your shirt and completely visible to anyone who might be looking. He can't help the amused smirk that crawls onto his face. That'll be there for the rest of the week.

And so will your image in his mind, apparently.

#meraki thirsts #n/sfw #hi hello i am once again simping for jade leech #i think he would be a cute drunk hehe #maybe he's more expressive when he's drunk #the type to freely admit all of his deep innermost thoughts that he usually keeps sealed behind a polite smile #you get jade drunk and you will hear unfiltered honesty #and probably some breeding kink #he has the filthiest thoughts bouncing around in that brain of his #he sees you tipsy and thinks you look so breedable #it's the eel instincts <3 #conversely i think floyd would become sleepy and maybe even a little reserved or more easily irritated #he gets really energetic but is just as quick to crash and become so tired #azul is far more emotional very clingy cries when you tell him that's enough alcohol #probably shameless as well #the type to give you the dreamiest look while admitting all sorts of truths #no veiled sentiments or backhanded compliments #just real true genuine tako #also breeding kink LOL jade and floyd are dragging him back to his room #and he's throwing a tantrum over how he'll never get to give you any babies #because he's being 'taken away from you forever' (dramatic tako)#azul wants to experience the eager anticipation that is waiting for his babies to come swimming home #to you and him after they hatch T_T he wants a sugary happily ever after under the sea #also the type to ask the next morning 'did i do or say anything strange?'#jade and floyd are like 'lol do you *really* want the receipts from that night?'#knowing the twins they likely have all of it on video #azul is mortified </3 his babygirl-ness really shows through when he's drunk

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yelenapines · 4 months

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watched tbosas today. needless to say i am obsessed with the red uniform skirt and they should have been wearing those the whole movie. thank you.

#tbosas #much more to say about this movie but thats it for now #actually no lets TALK #they literally changed how the games end which is fine but like how is no one noticing #also um clemensia dropped in got bit and thats it?? bye bye? have fun?#also this annoying bitch in my grade said she hates sejanus in the movie but loves him in the book um please get his name out of your mouth #if you're gonna be speaking filth about my son #ugh #anyways um rachel ate #love how the movie can tell the whole story tho i *am* conflicted about my feelings on how fast paced it was #and then again not seeing his inner monologue is a problem but like it's a movie so idk #also ofc the vibe is different between parts 1 and 2 and part 3 idk why people dont like it i think its cool and like thats the point to se #his evolution #sejanus' death was horrible like i'm sorry the mockingjays reproducing his last cries for help are just.#anyhoo #i will not shut up ok let's keep going #ik that like ppl are simping for tom blyth and as u should tbh same but you COULD NOT CHANGE HIM OR FIX HIM IK ITS A JOKE BUT IT BOTHERS ME #SO MUCH #like ik it's being silly and goofy but it just rubs me the wrong way cause like its not true #also Tigris and Snow's story is so fucking sad kms #also TF WAS THAT MOMENT IN THE ARENA WHERE SEJANUS ALMOST KISSED CORYO WE ALL SAW IT OK #sejanus is not straight at all lmao he spent the whole movie batting eyelashes at coryo but ALSO i love the angst of the marcus x sejanus i #idea i made up #also coriolanus is so fucking goofy like bitch pls “mY oLd SeLf. I kIlLeD hIm To Be WiTh YoU” bestie sit down #ok rant over #yelenaposts #sejanus plinth

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scheppke · 7 months

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you know i would probably be absolutely stoked for a hypothetical dishonoured 3 if death of the outsider didnt exist. and also if it wasnt microsoft just trying to recoup losses from redfall. microsoft stop ruining game dev studios challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

#susie speaks #i am and forever will be a dishonoured simp its true but if dh3 is announced i dont think i will have much hope for it

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chiquitafresa · 2 months

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