#i am feeling some type of way about the 80s right now ok | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nanjokei · 8 months

Note

same anon here, incredibly interested in the history from someone who lived through it

ok!

here's my own rundown on why the vocaloid bubble burst in the mid 2010s!

almost irreversibly! (don't worry— this story has a happy ending)

if anyone is wondering, yes, you can reblog this! i only say this because this took a lot of work to write so if anyone feels compelled, yes, stroke my ego a bit, i allow such a thing. now, i might get snippy here and there, but i'm not serious at all. my sense of humor is pretty tsukkomi-ish and it shows up in how i describe things. <-disclaimer for if this post breaks containment because i know fandom types don't like my sense of humor if they're not given the context that i LOVE what i'm talking about and rib on it out of utmost adoration

as a disclaimer, i do lightly look things up to check on stuff timeline wise and its validity, but this is from my own point of view and memory and a personal retelling, so if you have a different take on it then i'm sure our viewpoints can co-exist. also, i speak about utaite from the point of view of someone who respects their existence but does not participate. so if a few facts are off... i am speaking only from the aspect of what relates to what i'm talking about. also if there are any typos i stopped being thorough with my checking and editing like 4k words in since i am not being paid to write this, it is just for fun. anyways~

so where we wanna start here is before the big bubble era. i think most people would agree that it was in full swing around mid 2012, but i'll set the date at september 23, 2011. the posting of the song kagerou daze (by the way, as a testament to how much of a boomer i am, despite being an kagepro fan from the start i find myself still using the "kagerou days" romanization by accident every time). by the way, senbonzakura, one of the biggest vocaloid songs ever for the longest time, was posted only a few days earlier. just to paint a picture. but that's not the only thing... i think what we want to look at especially is the end of the vocaloid2 era and what was going on during and before. the final vocaloid2 product, vy2, was released on april 25th, 2011. in this timeline, there are a few angles i wanna focus on. the state of the culture, its spread, utaite and producers. by the way, if i had to date when i met vocaloid, it was around 2008. right before gakupo came out, maybe.

around this time, the culture of vocaloid-ke (vocaloid family) type secondary works were falling out of fashion. 2010 and before, i feel that vocaloid had a strong image of nico nico douga especially— not that it didn't during the bubble era. but i mean the people participating. when miku came out, people viewed her as a novelty while still thinking to themselves they had stumbled across something special. there was no subculture like that before, and the closest counterpart to this was idolmaster. now, many know this is the origin of the -P suffix came from. it's a tossed around factoid now but people should know that it was certainly a phenomena back then. and a LOT of early miku adopters (like 80% were either already in the doujin music scene, the DTM (desktop music) scene, trained musicians or even some industry pros. and a lot of these people were nerdy and geeky and loved anime and games and manga so of course their first point of reference for building vocaloid's identity was idolmaster. touhou, idolmaster's next door neighbor, also had a lot of influence given many of the music people in its scene dabbled in vocaloid early on. so naturally the fans that were attracted to vocaloid were also nerds. at first there were only cryptonloids, but gakupo quickly followed (and continuing in the trend of heavy nnd association— kentaro miura (RIP), a big fan of nnd and especially idolmaster— designed and drew his art 100% pro bono out of love for the site and its culture). luka came out... i think gumi was the first shift. gumi just felt, different. i personally owe it to her being modeled after ranka lee, the iconic role of her voice provider, megumi nakajima— ranka lee was the underdog character in her source macross frontier's love triangle. so i feel like that image somewhat imprinted itself on gumi. gumi was not popular at first at all. her release came and went with not much fanfare. ironically the aspect of rivalry would come back under stuff like the miku vs gumi debate. this is probably the first real demonstration of "it doesn't matter how good the voice is, it matters who uses it and how that propagates the voice".

and so i arrive at the producers of the time, maybe late 2008 early to mid 2009, the newcomers. the ones that weren't necessarily otaku through and through, but more on the "teenagers who like vocaloid and/or don't have a singer to sing for them, and want to make music". i will be specific and say it is people like wowaka (RIP), deco*27 and hachi/kenshi yonezu specifically. wowaka for example had a very fresh take— his pvs deemphasized the vocaloid, but it also inspired many fan pvs because of it. i will not go into how it became ironic that he quit due to the attribution to the voice. but his moody lyrics captured a lot of hearts and his style carried a youth to it. hachi did a lot of his own artsy pvs. deco*27 was very unpolished and amateur but his music was VERY of the times. the synths, the guitar, very youthful. aside from wowaka, whose comeup immediately led to him getting signed quickly (and the guy himself just walked and i don't blame him) i think what made these guys (deco and hachi) stand out from the rest in the end is one thing: they picked up gumi. and this set them apart from the old and dusted otaku who didn't pick gumi up, or those who picked her up thinking of her only as ranka lee. mozaik role (still deco's most viewed song on nnd btw, with no sign of stopping. and he is clearly PISSED about it). matryoshka. all that kibs of noise. by the way, matryoshka's stint in the vocaloid rankings went unchallenged until it was finally killed by senbonzakura. that's a good two years of dominance!! a lot of the breakout stars or people who got more popular during 2010 used gumi, i'm talking your 40mPs, your sasakure.UKs, your buzzGs. incidentally, a lot of these people got signed... most for their vocaloid stuff. 40mP, sasakure, deco, kous and others were signed under label split-offs like U/M/A/A. wowaka and hachi... were signed for themselves. specifically, wowaka and his band hitorie, and hachi as himself kenshi yonezu.

but producers were not the only ones being signed. utaite, who had been a thing before even vocaloid was a thing, found themselves growing rapidly due to them increasingly participating in the culture as both fans and beneficiaries. personally, i split off utaites eras as "before piko and akiakane" and "after piko and akiakane". the before era included people who either started very early on when vocaloid became a thing on nnd, or started before it (participating in chorus medleys or posting utattemita videos of anison for example, like gero). it was all amateur and everyone was doing it for fun... but the record companies doth lurk around the vocaloid scene at this rate. akiakane and piko i pick specifically because they were the first utaite who were very publically signed. piko was signed under sony's ki/oon records! akiakane had two or three big albums under the subsidary of VAP, toy's factory (if you wanna have fun take a look at the list of talent they rep). piko is especially important— as he had a vocaloid made of him. this marked first big interest of corporations and large record companies to actually enter the vocaloid space— in the most direct way possible. btw, the reason piko the vocaloid is dead is because piko the person is no longer signed under sony. it's not outright confirmed, but piko the guy stopped tweeting about utatane piko the second he transferred labels. he is stuck in a weird catch 22 he probably will never be free of, though yamaha is doing some insane moves lately, i wonder if they'd ever try to buy the character out and revive him as a stunt. (they are doing many funny stunts lately. but a subject for another time.)

finally, my last point in this preamble is the interest in telling stories through vocaloid had only continued to grow. i think the two biggest early examples were the prisoner series by shujinP and the ever so infamous evillious chronicles by mothy. their explosive popularity is wholeheartedly owed to rin and len— ok this is a tangent but this is the genius of the rin and len package, that to this day was never replicated, they come together as you know and since they are male and female with no set setting, they are an easy buy and you can make a story because you can do two points of view across several songs... like literally. its paperplane vs prisoner. daughter of evil vs servant of evil. and their fans were and continue to be super passionate. it's great, we would be missing a huge chunk of what makes vocaloid subculture what it is without them. of course, shujinP's series (plural because they had several) is less known these days but it was probably the first series to get plays and novels and all that. quickly followed by EC. later came series like sasakure's doomsday series, stuck in a limbo between old and new era (most of the songs released in the old era but the novelization and such came out during the new), and a few "outsider" series like numtack05/putinP's series (the reasons this never got popular is because it was absurdist and shitpost-y and involved too much political imagery, not only that but also because putinP used a lot of copyright samples (most famously ronald mcdonald and sazae-san clips)— the freely distributed album vers omit these samples entirely and i can confirm the songs are worse for it)

so to give a summary of the above section

the tastes of fans were maturing

there was a shift in how vocaloid was perceived

the growing influence of utaite

the growing interest of big corpos in the scene

the growing interest in storytelling using vocaloid as a medium

anyway, here comes the real deal. and... it's gonna be a mess. just like the era itself was. i hope you're ready, at least.

even the very first echo of vocaloid3 felt kinda corpo-y. it wasn't, but.. looking back. it kind of felt like it. the first time we ever found out about v3 was through a leak of seeU's demo— but it was a work in progress leak, so it had the voice of her provider dahee kim singing along. people had no idea so they assumed this was the capability of the software. it was exciting! kpop was just starting to get popular, and we were getting a new vocaloid software, with korean capability!!!

anyway. we're not talking about the can of worms that was seeU.

not just because of dahee kim. but because it's not related beyond this. also the fact that korean fans were heavily and horribly mistreated by the majority japanese fandom for obvious reasons. i do not have the depths to speak on that stuff, but it says a lot that the software's first big swing ended up like that.

but i wanted to illustrate the mood of the fans going into this era. it was full of hopes and dreams. now, i don't want any wannabe know-it-alls wagging their fingers at me and checking the wikia going "b-but cullen, mew also came out!! at the same time!!" the seeU leak came out first. i remember there were fights over whether or not that demo was real. it was a cultural shift like no other. who the fuck cares about mew? literally her only legacy is one really amazing ezfg song. i will not debate anyone on this btw. i try to be objective but i'm allowed to inject a bit of my own opinion here too. you know who were also full of hopes and dreams? the companies. not your internetcos and your ahsofts, no, i'm talking publicly traded shits and record companies. look... i'm coming off harsh. i actually don't hold that much animosity, but you're gonna see why this was the first huge misstep of the era.

nice picture, right? this was the kind of optimism we started off this era on. but, i'll break down the picture for you in a way that helps illustrate a point somewhat:

your girlies from V2 like gumi (who was this era's it girl), lily, galaco (even if her shitty V2 version is contest only)

your earnest newcomers mew (look, even yamaha girlies count), cul, aoki lapis, seeU (one could argue.), IA (one could argue...)

tone rion of dear stage (who represented dempagumi inc., the group her voice provider came from, though this was a myth for years until it was proven... also it was clear they wanted to make the rest of dempagumi into vocaloids but rion flopped at the time. there was even a picture of her friends floating around. astoundingly embarrassing confidence. one billion dead vocaloids.)

akikoloid-chan of lawsons (yes, the convenience store! she is a vocaloidification of their mascot and i would argue the poster child of the modern brand private vocaloid. she was retired in uh.. 2019 i wanna say? though she was dormant for a long time anyway)

ring suzune, the aborted failure of minna no vocalo keikaku (everyone's vocalo-project)... this one involves a lot of otona no jijou AKA adult circumstances (japanese corpo's favorite excuse. you will now notice this phrase every time you hear it oooo). just unfortunate all around

yuzuki yukari of vocalomakets, i put her in a separate category because she really is a girlie of her own. a vocal born from producers being dissatisfied that their wants weren't being answered and no company was taking them up, they just went "fuck it" and produced yukari on their own. a huge outlier in this era of vanity projects and companies using the scene for their own crap.

not pictured, but i have to mention her due to her complicated position in this era, but mayu of exit tunes. exit tunes is a record label that heavily supported vocaloid and utaite during this era, signing both producers and utaite, and making compilation cds of popular vocaloid hits. and probably saw to it that due to their dominance in the area of compilation cds (and they still dominate, even if their releases are sparse these days their cds still top oricon without effort), them sneaking mayu into the tracklists would work... my thoughts on this? my position has softened a lot over the years. and i've always thought "they gave up right before she organically caught on, they should have kept pushing. so what a shame".

now you may notice i bolded a few of these and made special mention of the companies behind them. you probably already figured it out, but this era had heavy investment from parties who had only to gain from a rapidly growing niche subculture. see, unlike the other two of nnd's big three idolmaster and touhou, who are IPs where you need some kind of cooperation to officially get in on, vocaloid... is incredibly free, so laissez faire in comparison. you buy a 9,000 dollar dev kit and get to work making your mascot. it was... so easy. so free. so sweet. but real life is not so easy, or free, or sweet. you actually had to be accepted by the fans, and like i said before... the voice does not matter. what matters is who uses it, and how that propagate the voice. this is true time and time again. it is the ultimate "how many times do i have to teach you this lesson, old man?!" of the scene from a commercial standpoint. no matter how many years pass. ergo, one billion dead vocaloids. corpo vocaloids were releasing and they flopped immediately. earnest products from newcomers were dropping and struggling, though def doing better than the corpo ones (like lapis, lapis did ok). existing "in crowd" companies were vomiting out new vocals and not even promoting them. it was a disgusting era of excess and death and bile and plague and war and and and. it's astounding that it is hard carried by the art that came out of it. because if you only look at the commercial side of things, it is fucking disgusting.

now, onto the fan aspect. remember when i said this era truly kicked off when kagerou daze came out? yup. here it comes. so, anyone lived through this era remembers the cambrian explosion of original projects that did not make use of vocaloid mascots— arguably the final death knell of vocaloid-ke secondary works being the mainstream.

now, i'm planting my flag in the ground here very firmly— i do not ride the bandwagon of the people who erroneously attribute the near death of the scene to kagepro. it's just not true. personally i have a very complicated (bordering on near sort of but not quite negative, depending on how nostalgic i feel that day) relationship with the series, but to blame it is incredibly narrowminded and ignorant of the actual reasons the bubble burst, and not to mention unfair. if you find it annoying, fine. but just say you don't like the series and move on. and really, for better or for worse, mekakucity days and mekakucity records are unironically god tier vocaloid albums that will be remembered for years to come. i just have to say this because i see a lot of people blame jin for very flimsy reasons... SHUT UP!!! anyway.

i think one of the issues with the whole project culture that flourished during this era was simply the fact that since they were multimedia projects (whether by accident like kagepro or intentionally from the get), fans were coming from all angles, and even those who got into it through vocaloid eventually became super mega invested in them as separate IPs. which is... unfortunately an issue. so when these properties eventually spun off into manga, light novels, covers with real seiyuu, merch and ultimately some even netting anime projects... once those projects either abruptly ended (lol, lmao, this will come back later) or reached their natural conclusion, inevitably a lot of those fans either leave with it or found themselves burned out on vocaloid itself, or perhaps even think they've outgrown it.

next, utaite. now i mentioned a bit earlier about how the first batch of utaite were amateurs who didn't expect anything out of it and did it just cause, and how exit tunes signed a lot of them in this era. now, comes the time i speak about utaite "after piko and akiakane". i believe due to a generational gap and subconsciously perhaps due to the signing of a few utaite from the old guard at this point, the nu utaite of the 2010s had a sort of individuality to them... this isn't an insult, and a large part of their popularity actually came from them always collaborating and a lot of them ending up befriending each other. again, i'm an outsider, but i understand this much. but this era for utaite was the beginning of the idea that an utaite can become a superstar. in the end, very few of them did become superstars.

a lot of them naturally returned to a normal level of popularity after the bubble. there aren't a lot of your AtRs or your amatsukis and such. the smart ones became vtubers before being a vtuber was cool. to give an example: un:c and hashiyan who are arguably oldheads more than nu era became anjo and kosaka of monsterz mate. this isn't a doxx btw, this is publically available information, and un:c often credits himself as a mixer under projects he does as anjo. also, a certain duo of female utaite whose names i will not mention went on to form the super popular vtuber duo himehima. there are other early adopters like kano and god knows who else that i don't feel like mentioning. anyway, if your utaite did it after 2018 and under their own identity it is a desperate plea for attention. sorry but it's just the objective truth. tangent over... did you think i wasn't gonna shoehorn vtubers into this somehow?! anyway.

even sutopuri who got mega popular, only really formed after the vocaloid bubble burst, perhaps even as a result of it. utaite had a positive effect on the vocaloid scene and still do. but at the time, i think it was at its strongest. utaite NEEDED vocaloid, and vocaloid benefitted greatly from their continued patronage and love for it. i for one will not be caught slandering utaite and their relationship with vocaloid even if i will always prefer the vocaloid versions. the issue here comes from the fact that way too many were signed without much star factor (i'm not disparaging them, i'm just saying they did not hold their audience across the mediums), and even at that their fans splintered off into many tribes and many weren't really into vocaloid in the first place and were more into the livestreams and twitter banter. that's just how things shook out. you even have your reols and such, as reol was the face but in a sense her, gigaP and okiku were a set and gigaP left the scene to focus on commercial work with those two. too many of them got signed and splintered off into their own little fandoms before THOSE fandoms kind of died out. so this is another part where fans disappear and lose interest. you're starting to see the pattern here, right?

there's so much stuff i thought i would touch on, like how gumi was the undisputed it girl of the scene at this time, and how kagepro rose IA to prominence (all because jin wanted to buy gumi but didn't find her in the store) and how IA's people 1st place locked certain producers in their basement (like jin, yasuhiro, ishifuro etc) and... now this is a conspiracy on my part but prevented them from working on anything else, so that drew more talent away from the scene... but i realized it's tangential and belongs to other parts in this conversation. i want to reiterate here though before we go on to the biggest elephant in the room of all which would be the point of no return... there is more to the vocaloid bubble era of 2012-2015 than projects, than corpo and record company bullshit, than utaite fans. and there is more to the era before that than the top brass producers i mentioned earlier. i really... really lament how so much of early vocaloid reuploads are gone from youtube. there's a whole world just gone. so, anyway, are you ready?

the final block in this weird jenga of a story.

the producer, suzumu, and his unfortunate associates.

i will cut to the chase because it's easier to explain who was involved once i say what happened. to put it shortly... suzumu "stole" his songs. this is weird and vague and i always hated the way people used polite euphemisms to explain it because it made the situation way more confusing than it had to be— he used his producer friends as ghostwriters to compose songs for him, basically. and was very not nice about it according to one of the people involved. now i will probably adopt a somewhat sympathetic angle that people who have previously heard of this case may have not encountered before. not because i feel bad for that fuck, but because it seems like at least one of the people impacted has forgiven him, and others have moved on in less obvious ways. he's also professionally making music in the industry now. as much as i want to keep up the act of disliking him, i don't care anymore. i still dislike what he did immensely because it impacts producers i love to this day. but the man came forth about it himself and those involved forgave him. it's been almost a decade now... man!

suzumu, before getting into posting songs (who knows how many were actually his and which were ghostwritten), was a prolific lyric writer who worked with some of the trendiest vocaloid producers around. i'll cross gigaP out, since he was not involved in the incident, but almost every single person involved in this had worked with him in a lyric or story writing capacity (for 150P and komine specifically). here are the involved parties as i recall, bolded are people who he "stole" from

mafumafu, the person who spoke the most about it post suzumu's confession and the most vocal, and likely the person who was used as a ghostwriter the most (i don't recall if he actually alludes to this or not but people commonly think this). mafumafu had a series of vocaloid songs that told a story, but stopped using vocaloid after the incident for a while and songs that were going to get pvs from his first vocaloid album were not posted. he contributed a song called machigai sagashi for the vocaloid flavored moba #compass in 2015, but it seems like that song was probably in the works since before the incident for reasons i will highlight in a moment. suzumu wrote the lyrics for only one of the songs. iirc, mafumafu's song berserk is about suzumu. don't remember if this is confirmed or not. btw, the album of those songs, meikyou shisui, is really underrated and you should check it out. im not a mafu guy but that album is great

kemu, the person who is arguably closest to suzumu and the one who most publicly supported suzumu (albeit wordlessly) in later years by working with him professionally. when i mention someone forgiving suzumu, i mean him. suzumu wrote the lyrics for most of his kemu voxx songs, a famous multimedia project kemu was on the helm of along with hatsuko as the main illustrator. since kemu no longer had a lyricist, the project stalled for years until he posted a song suddenly in 2017 (with self written lyrics). it seems like the series is continuing still, but with a different direction

150P, who worked with suzumu heavily for his shuuen no shiori (bookmark of demise) project, a project that was conceived from the start to be a story. this part makes me really mad, guys!! i'll try to keep calm about it. 150P wrote over 50 songs (idk if this is an actual number but he wrote a lot. at least 40.) for the series, with suzumu writing the story and lyrics. the character designs were done by saine (who dodged a bullet all things considered.) and the art was done by komine. 150P was already doing crazy things before shuuenpro, his most popular song is still his insane 12-len classical metal chorus song lost destination. now shuuenpro caught on slower than its peers and was an underdog. i LOVE shuuenpro to this day. you know what? right when it was finally getting its first W, when the album that had seiyuu covers at come out on oricon in third place, suzumu dropped his confession. what a slap to the fucking face!! the manga of the series hastily wrapped up after that. 150P and komine disappeared and no longer did stuff ever. 150P recently appeared for a mafumafu anniversary thing so i'm glad he's still alive. but, komine...

komine, the only non-producer, an artist with the worst luck. she was slowly rising to prominence doing pv art for a lot of popular producers, and was the main artist of shuuenpro most prominently. during the initial release of the first few shuuenpro songs, she was accused of tracing, and the art of the pv of sarumane isutori game had to be done by someone else. komine stopped using social media at that point, but continued to make art for the project quietly and quite prolifically. so she was already on some kind of fraught standing even though the tracing allegations were disproven. fast forward to the suzumu blowup, komine packed up her bags and disappeared forever. if she had become disillusioned, i do not blame her. her final public contribution was the design of jeanne d'arc from #compass, the character who was paired with the mafumafu song. all subsequent artworks of jeanne were done by different artists. i suspect the reason the vocaloid version of machigai sagashi did not have a proper pv was due to komine quitting. i can only imagine what that pv looked like! if you're wondering why i mention a pv, it's cuz compass fans got mad at mafu for having a fancy pv for his self cover but not for the original. but otona no jijou, you know? and where is that energy for eve who still hasn't released a pv for mistletoe publicly and only put it on his kuso app and with 0 compass association? who let that wishy washy fuck do an anniversary song? ...im not gonna go on a compass tangent. anyway.

so... why does this matter?

it matters because people became disillusioned due to this drama. it matters because suzumu took out some very popular and prolific people from the scene during what one could argue was a transitional phase. the fans of all those people, including suzumu's... gone. if you weren't there, you may not understand the cult of personality suzumu had. he had his name on everything and was friends with all the right people. when i heard about this incident... i just closed my eyes and sighed lol. it hurt and it hit when the scene was at its weakest. and was the final blow, almost. and it impacted the way people saw and talked about vocaloid for years. miku became "owakon" for a time. people thought kizuna ai was gonna replace her as a cultural touchstone (lol, lmao, it is proven time and time again that the big three cannot die). kenshi yonezu, in all his detached glory, came down from his jeweled encrusted throne to compose a song for miku's 10th birthday that he smugly thought was the death knell of nico nico douga.... which even at the time of its release was contested by even people who were on the same miku anniversary project and, whether you wanna acknowledge it or not, is still mocked to this day by several producers. magical mirai's theme this year even does it. there is no respect for sand planet or anything kenshi yonezu stood for in that song. what an asshole move no matter how you see it. argue with the wall if you don't agree, i don't want to hear it. the scene survived because there were producers and artists and fans who still loved it. not because of some sardonic fuckoff song by a guy so detached he'd write a funeral march for a birthday.

these days, i feel like the community is incredibly conscious of what happened. there are wanton community led events that encourage not only the creation of songs, covers, art and secondary creations but also the discovery of new producers— the biggest of which being vocaloid collection, which happens three times a year and has many categories, but most importantly the top ranking (producers active for 3+ years) and the rookie ranking. i once read a japanese article that said proseka brought new fans hungry for something beyond the music presented in the game, and vocacolle and other community led events and song posting festivals supplied the works. the average age of the new vocaloid producer is— and this is my own estimate based on how many heart attacks i've been given the past 3 or 4 years— 17~19 years old. they say things like "i know of kagepro but i wasn't there"!! should i get my cane out!! who's driving me to the retirement home?!

even companies involved in the product end are more savvy these days.... (holding my tongue about a certain company of a popular synth software and its ceo because i have nothing nice to say). i think they realized that you can't clap with one hand and that appealing to the end user and fans is a necessity. honestly, i can only be excited for what comes next. we're never going back to that dark age, i can say this with utmost confidence. do i miss the past of the times before the bubble, back when vocaloid was a smidge more geeky? sure. but we can only really move forward, so why not enjoy it

#ask #anonymous #it came up to over 5k after all #idk how i clocked that.#im so scared to post this but i cant even read words anymore so if it still has typos then so be it

52 notes · View notes

hasellia · 10 months

Text

Happy non-binary awareness week everyone! Last night I revealed to my mother that I don't fully identify with being a man, and before I go into how that went, I wanted to type up how I got here.

I knew I was different to most kids growing up. When I wanted to play, they would go away, and when they wanted to play, I would go away. I was diagnosed with autism at a very young age, so any differences I saw between me and them were always blamed on that. “Oh, I like long hair and they don’t, must be because I’m autistic” “Oh they like athletics and I like drawing, must be because I’m autistic”. Any such difference. I’d come to learn such stereotypes of even cis neurotypicals aren’t true though. Eventually I found happiness by isolating myself, and my parents knowing that the usual parenting techniques wont work on me decided to lean into that. I had a very isolating childhood. My only friends being one other kid forced into the relationship and those constructed either in my head or by parasocial tactics by C list internet celebrities. Eventually though, I realised that I couldn’t spend my life solely living on someone else’s labour and decided to integrate into the community.

Then the pandemic happened. Then restrictions lifted. As I slowly teetered into the community, I noticed an uncommon reaction I was getting. People started confusing me for a woman. Not even necessarily mean spiritedly but genuinely caught off-guard when people close to me correct them “Actually, he’s a man.”. This was odd to me, after these interactions I noticed something else. “I’m not a fan of men, but you’re different.” “You’re not like the other men.” And such things were said constantly by my family. Even my 80 year old wannabe-nun grandmother said “Young men a such troublemakers, but you’re not like most men Hasselia. You’re something else.” Going into the community I could somewhat see what they were saying. I didn’t have the same attitude or likes as most of the ‘regular’ men I saw. But at those times, I just thought they were neurotypical. But then I realised even the neurodivergent men I’ve met were different. They didn’t feel the same need to be quiet or thoughtful as I did and just generally went about things a bit differently… But one person with autism is just one person with autism, right? Nonetheless I decided to ask someone about what they mean when they say, “you’re not like the other men.” “I dunno, you’re just different. You just move and speak and carry yourself differently. When women are around you, they seem to feel safer with you then the other men. You’re like a boy sometimes but you’re not immature. And sometimes you’re just… You. There’s no other way to describe it.” That was essentially what I was able to get out of them. I’m still perplexed by the movement and speech thing, but I realised I still hadn’t quite got enough of a reference to understand what they were saying. Eventually I met more nice men, bad men and those in-between and I realised even more how I’m just not like them. So, I started some soft research and a lot of internal searching. At first, I thought, “maybe I am a woman after all”. However, I found that those incidents of being believed to be one to be more distressing then I had hoped, so I stopped trying to see myself as one. Then I started being more strictly non-binary and… Ok not really. At the time I thought I’d be carrying the attitudes and beliefs instilled in me by my surrounding culture even if I transitioned. But now I realise I can’t quite fully separated my self from my assigned identity. I was confused on who exactly I was. A gender non-conforming man? A non-binary? Something in between? Maybe I really was a woman and I’m just had some unseen hidden internalised self-hate? What changed though was I saw a post on Tumblr about Therians / Otherkins.

The post went along the lines of “How cool is it that some people look inside themselves and see a black hole or wolf or something?” The way it was phrased just made somethings click in my head. I needed to look inside myself. And when I did, I didn’t quite see a man. I saw something resembling one, made from glass, housing diatomic white sand that hid a secret beauty until closely inspected. In an odd way, that was what I needed to really understand myself. I could call myself a man, as what was needed by society, the situation or just how I felt at the time. But I know that isn’t just what I am, both as a person, in society as well as in myself. And I’m not JUST gender-nonconforming, there’s more to it than that, something I still can’t quite explain. Some people look inside themselves and just see something else or a man, or a woman irrespective of their biology or assigned gender. I’m still not sure what exactly to call my degree of gender, all of this is still rather new to me and I don’t really have someone to hold my hand. Part of me feels like an uncertain fraud, because of my social isolation I never really had to deal with any dysphoria or confrontations about my presentation until recently. Some people go their whole lives struggling to define themselves, but I at least had a convenient excuse with autism. Even my birth name, although it's though it's masculine I've never met anyone else with the same name so it feels like it was almost made just for me. As an AMAB my identity may not be the most flashy or hyper-radical but they’re mine. I’m fully happy to call myself a man, non-binary and a non-binary man. My name is Hasselia, my pronouns are he/they and I'm a non binary man.

#non binary awareness week #non binary #nonbinary #he/they #long post #about me #This stuff's so new to me I don't even know if I'm supposed to have a seat at the trans table or not #Also I got some important documents due in like 2 days so sorry if I forget to follow this up soon

3 notes · View notes

notallwonder · 1 year

Text

Okeydoke. CM 16x09 "Memento Mori". What delights and disappointments do you have in store for me...

Spoilers etc etc etc under the cut.

I've been rewatching season 3. It feels like such a different show. I think the impact of the shake up of producers and cast that happened in season 5/6 cannot be overestimated. And of course with this new season they've actively tried to make it a different iteration. But yeah...the creative vision or whatever shifted a lot over its original run.

Anyway.....back to the matter at hand...

oh no...Rossi flashback. :/ oh buddy. ngl hearing Rossi break up like that makes me very sad.

(Emily you look fabulous in your funeral dress)

I do appreciate the time they've given to Rossi & Emily's relationship

also it just makes me uncomfy that Rossi's doing his canvassing all alone. Even the Mormons don't do that.

OH SHIT is going down!

Emily is your blazer sparkly? no no it's like some kinda tufted wool pattern. (Cute)

JJ your hair looks great

Tara you must be right, "it's hard to be a new dad and a psychopath at the same time" (also you look great bb)

OH SNAP he walked right in??!! with a lil smirk??!!

Okay okay okay TARA / REBECCA FLASHBACK. Aw, Tara that look on your gorgeous face. 🥰 I am not intimately familiar with Al-Anon but I can see how Rebecca's history might influence her tendency to go scorched earth/go to extremes in her reactions.

I wish the flashbacks were in color though. The black & white photography is pretty I suppose, but I wanna see their beautiful faces in full color.

Urgency!! Rebecca coming thru!! (in her fire burgundy suit btw)

this Sacramento offer is all she's got?? I know she's under review, whatever that entails, and presumably thus no longer in line for an associate atty general job (is that actually a thing??) but she's... still actively working in the DOJ in Washington DC hence why she's even plausibly (lol) in this room. Why would this Sacramento job be the only option left to her? This does not make sense.

Tara looks so beautiful, GOD. but also too sad.

Ugh back to this bitch (Elias)

This little tete-a-tete w/ Rossi is...intruiging. Ooh twist that knife sir.

LOL the very subtle sound cue/background music they put on Rossi's grin after he says "Almost." God that was perfect. Like the cartoon sparkle on a smile. Like the Schitt's Creek chime.

Wow this guy has plans on plans on cojones. I like him. He's bad news.

Side note: it annoys me that they keep calling Sicarius the "most prolific" killer they've ever seen. Didn't they estimate Frank's body count in the 80s or 90s?

Oh....our favorite asshole Tyler Green. Oh and our other favorite ah Will - here in an official non-husband capacity. Neato.

The question remains....is Tyler Green a bad guy? He's clearly taking PG for a ride, but what that fully means I don't know.

OOooooh big drama betw Tyler & Luke. That stare down!

Does PG see it now? She might.

F U C K. Suspicions (Apparently!) confirmed ! !

Rossi you in danger girl.

this could still be a vigilante type situation...but they're leaning hard on making Green seem sus and at the very least he's an uncontrolled quantity. He's gonna get in the way.

ok another flashback. this one im categorizing as dumb bc it's about Tyler. Honestly I'd rather have an Emily flashback. Even if it's just her like...loading her dishwasher. God, what I wouldn't give.

cute baby tho. Tyler has baby-related ptsd

This angst filled grocery shopping RULES!!!!! Rolling Stones babey!!!

Rossi, stalking people while they are grocery shopping is not nice. I get it, you have a job to do blah blah. But coming up on ladies in the cereal aisle is just annoying as hell.

OH MY GAWD. Rossi talking serial killer with the wife in the CEREAL AISLE?!?!?!!!!! only god above and people I'll never speak to know if this was by design but I am LOSING it over this stupid visual pun.

Sydney! You left your toilet paper! Don't you remember how hard it was to get toilet paper just a few short years ago?!

LMAO Rossi you got played buddy.

It does feel odd given recent episodes that Bailey isn't in the middle of this fray, but I'm so not mad he's not there.

Emily's "yes ma'am" reminds me of her very flat "ma'am" to Strauss in "100". Very different (this one contains no venom), but I just have not been able to get Strauss out of my head while watching Prentiss this season.

ZOMG LUKE & PENELOPE. Pen, why are you oversharing with him???!!!! Oh honey. You really think he's just your friend. Can't talk to Prentiss bc you already fucked that up, can't talk to JJ bc JJ will call you out on your shit, can't talk to Tara bc she's in her own world of hurt... you friend zoned Luke and are about to find Out!

Oh GOd PG! Like... I know you sometimes lack a filter but c'mon. 😬

FUCK Rossi WHAT are you DOING. This man who has been marinating in grief for years is about to lose it all

The only one who we know knows where he is is Tyler Green (awful sentence so sorry)

I'm getting tense

The Two Devolvers

AAAGH I just LOVE when an intense moment goes straight to psoriasis drug commercials!!! Fuck!

Is the Dan & Sheila thing a reference to a real podcast of some sort? Who are Dan and Sheila.

I do like when the show seems to acknowledge the shortcomings of profiling as an endeavor

Rossi rounding out the Brown Jacket Brigade

Oh. Emily.

Oh. GARCIA. Chickens....roosting....etc

i am just dying, Dying for Emily to completely Lose Her Shit. i doubt she will get the opportunity. But I want it.

JJ getting the lay of the land watching Emily's reaction. Tara getting the lay of the land watching Penelope.

I want Rossi to pee in the car, and then say "it's just a rental".

A favor from DC Metro? For when they are in the field in SEATTLE? I know this is just to get Will into the mix but it's annoying.

Garcia! Um, the implication that you think avoidant-attachment style folks are like...better at or predisposed to lying? Fucked up. I think you have not been getting an A+ in therapy (thing that's normal to want, etc...). All this "Penelope has thrived during the pando / been getting so great at self care etc" seems to be revealing itself as a front of sorts. Kinda feels like a third, smaller, devolution.

The Will stans of the world will rejoice - he's on the jet

For the record, I think Emily made a calculated risk/decision to send PG into the field with the rest. Perhaps thinking she would be uniquely situated to convince/keep Tyler out of the way. Meta-wise, it was necessary to then place JJ/Will and Luke/Garcia in the same frame on the jet. I'm sure that was no accident.

Ugh. Do we think Rossi's out? Is he gonna be dead when this is all said and done? I hope not. He's still got lots of grandparenting to do. But he really should fucken retire.

OOOOHHHHH. THE GARVEZ DATE. Again...I wish they gave us these flashbacks in color.

Oh, handholding!!!!!!!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 it's not the specific handholding I wished for, but it's the handholding I absolutely needed!!!!!!

Luke, my man. I love ya. I feel for ya. God. I'm sorry things went this way. Honestly, PG, if you have trouble conversing in a non-dunking way with someone you consider a friend...like maybe I'm being judgmental here but that sounds like a you problem that you might want to figure out babe.

Thinking about Luke compared with Derek. Derek would have pushed back on a statement like that from PG. Luke, bless him, does not push back because he's got more at stake emotionally / is wounded by it. But a statement like that from PG needs pushback, especially if you're trying to redefine the relationship.

I feel so bad for Emily. She has to keep it together but you know she's furious and deeply worried about her kidnapped work wife

Now we've come back around to Rossi's flashback pain. He didn't want to watch his wife be closed up underground. I see.

Zomg. I wonder if they are gonna cliffhanger the season with Rossi still trapped underground.

AAAAAAAAAAAH

I quite enjoyed this episode. I liked the directing, though I would have preferred the flashbacks in color. There were some really nice shots in there. A lot of backstory snippets. I wanna know more about Tara. What prompted her to go to Al-Anon, years after her marriage broke up? Does that have anything to do with the toning down/disappearance of her swagger? As for Garvez - I don't feel the same level of upset over how this has played out, but I think we're headed toward a reveal of Luke's deeper feelings and some kind of reckoning. And while it's not necessarily *fun* to watch Garcia make these choices, I am not convinced this was a completely bad decision storytelling-wise. I know, I'm in the minority there. Let her fuck up! Let her be unlikable, selfish, blind. I guess what would disappoint me the most is if there's no turn in this story, no real consequences or accountability. We'll see.

Favorite scene hands down was the angsty grocery shopping. What can I say, it gave me life.

#cm spoilers #cme spoilers #criminal minds spoilers #criminal minds evolution spoilers #criminal minds #criminal minds evolution

6 notes · View notes

freedfromthegalactichivemind · 1 year

Note

As someone who used to different takes on a 80's toy property like Transformers I've wondered what other versions of She-Ra could do. Considering how I feel SPOP is now sorta the definitive take for a entire generation of kids moving forward and will remain so for a while.

That being said.

Hot Take but I think it be kinda interesting if the next re-imagining of She-Ra was more full on Space War fantasy opera. Make the Horde the evil empire led by your Sauron leaders and what not? If your gonna re-imagine then I say do a complete one eighty to differentiate from what came before.

Does that mean Hordak is a Sauron...maybe and while that's not my cup of tea, hey I'm ok, I still have 2018 Hordak in his own pocket world.

I mean it worked for Transformers Prime (My favorite of the Transformers incarnation and my own definitive take)

But that's my take if they decided She-Ra gets another reboot.

It is a pretty diverse idea. The original She-Ra seems to have taken a lot of inspiration from Star Wars in the concept of a rebellion against a galaxy-spanning evil-empire. Certain versions of the spop-characters will always remain their own thing for me. I honestly don't think any other reimaging is going to create as perfect (perfectly imperfect!) version of Entrapta as this one did. And Hordak is just... I don't think we're ever going to get the unique, vulnerable villain like we got with him this time. I don't think we'll ever get a Double Trouble that's quite so extra, or a Light Hope that gives me "Fi from Skyward Sword" vibes quite as much. Adora was fun in the original, but not quite as delightfully goofy as in the reboot, while also wrestling with the crushing weight of a supposed destiny. Or Prime being such a worms-the-way-under-the-skin cult leader as he was. The characters in the Spop-imagining are unique. You spoke before about Hordak being a particularly malleable character though the franchise. I love the original, goofy-somewhat-incompetent-I-am-evil-har-har villain of the '80s (seriously has some of the BEST lines), but my heart was fully-captured by our brooding conflicted clone-boy. None are going to be quite like either of them and if a future adaptation were to go with something like 2002 He-Man and make a scary Sauron-type of guy, that could be a very cool interpretation in its own right. They'll be "someone named the same as my blorbo" in the end, rather than my blorbo, but it could be interesting to see what is done with the basic concept of cyborg-bat-monster-from-beyond-the-stars-sub-manager-of-an-evil-empire. You're right - they all kind of exist in their own mini-dimensions, only loosely connected.

#spop #classic she-ra #she-ra and motu adaptations

2 notes · View notes

glitchbirds · 2 years

Text

i really truly do think that rant video essays and stuff like rifftrax have done some irreparable damage to people’s abilities to critically analyze media thats objectively not “good” and i say this with like the disclaimers that Of Course You Can Watch Stuff Like Mystery Science Theater And Still Be Capable Of Genuine Critical Analysis and Of Course Watching Video Essays Is Not A Bad Thing and Of Course You Dont Have To Justify Not Liking Something,

but like i feel like for the average person watching a “bad” movie is now just an excuse to spend 90 minutes complaining and refusing to engage with a text whatsoever beyond the most basic surface level takeaways and this has become more and more the “norm” over the years and thats Fine but its also very disappointing. im not asking for everyone in the world to try to find the merit in bottom of the barrel SOV trash 80s slasher movies with a budget of 10,000 dollars and a cast made up entirely of the directors friends and people who owed him a favor, but i Am asking you, gently, to not immediately dismiss a movie as terrible and unsalvageable just because its very easy to tell its not a major studio production

like sometimes i watch a movie and despite the low budget/mediocre acting/weird dialogue/ugly cgi/whatever else i genuinely love and adore the storyline or the character arcs or the visuals or whatever else and then i find out that most people only know about it because they watched a video essay with “is this the WORST movie EVER MADE???” stamped on the thumbnail or spent the whole runtime listening to someone tear into every single small flaw and they will never in a million years understand how someone could actually enjoy it

and like again. that is not a bad thing. that is not a character flaw. ive seen movies with friends where we spend the whole runtime joking about it, ive seen films with live joke commentary (jerma’s public domain movie night w/ chat comes to mind), ive seen these same types of video essays! and sometimes there ARE films that really and truly are soulless and/or deserving of eternal mockery and i will happily join in on mocking them. im not telling you that this is a wrong way to watch movies or interact with media. just that maybe its not the right way to interact with media All the time and its ok to shut it off sometimes. sometimes in the trash you find something precious that will live with you for the rest of your life. but only if you go sifting through it first instead of throwing it out

#txt

7 notes · View notes

cinnamonest · 3 years

Text

Diluc Ragnvindr - Yandere Profile

Yall are so kind and I am so undeserving hhhhh

If you stand idly by that flower girl in Mondstadt her idle line is something like "All I can think about is Diluc" And honestly same

This man exudes bde I'm sorry I just... It is a known FACT that Diluc is packing and I refuse to believe otherwise, lord have mercy I'm bout to SIMP

tws: yandere, mentions of violence

tws (below cut): noncon, kinda misogynistic in 1 part

------

What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

Acutely aware, and in the beginning, frustrated with his own self. He's very much a loner type of guy, and he likes it that way -- in his mind, people are distractions.

He doesn't talk to you too much, but you'll slowly and subtly notice his presence with increasing frequency. He hovers. Silent, but intimidating. He's always there, in the background. Somehow, everywhere you go, you can spot him somewhere if you try, and even if you don't see him, you know someone is watching you, from the skin crawling feeling of eyes on you. It will never go away, and it's easily enough to drive you to paranoia.

In reality, he'd like to talk, really, but he doesn't know how. For the first time in his life, he actually has the urge to speak with someone, not for his own desire to speak so much as speak with you- to learn about you, to hear your voice. But the poor thing has no idea what to say. He's used to just going about his day and only speaking to others when they need something from him.

When he does talk to you, he finds himself even enjoying the silliest and most trivial of things you say. Normally he hates small talk, and he's normally annoyed by anything outside of very serious matters, but even if you're raving about something he has no interest in, he's happy to listen just because it's you.

He's fairly aware, too. Not a delusional for the most part, and he's honestly a bit afraid of rejection - he knows he's not the most pleasant or charming person to be around, and certainly not the best conversationalist. He tries to make up for it in thinking that his money, status, and protective ability can be something he can use to draw you in, so he makes sure to subtly and frequently remind you of those things.

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

Eventually, it's inevitable. It will happen, it's just a matter of time. His reasoning is less about your fragility and safety, even if he pretends it is, and more of a selfish thing. He doesn't want to be, and he'll certainly feel guilty for it, but he's a silently jealous person. Hearing you talk to others, seeing you smile at others, it drives him up the wall. Even during the day, he can't focus, thinking of what you're doing, who you're with, what you're doing with that person, and so on. He can't get anything accomplished, and people notice something is wrong with him. Really, it won't be a very long time at all.

He's not a very good manipulator, and he can't really think of a good reason to get you to walk into the winery backrooms on your own, so as barbaric as it may feel, he'll settle for the old fashioned way, just taking you, probably when you're walking all by yourself late at night. He is very intelligent, and will most likely formulate a way of making you seen responsible for some crime upon your disappearance, to discourage you from leaving, and to make it seem less mysterious when you disappear. People will assume that the darknight hero got to you. And, well, they’re not wrong.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape?

Initially, he's watchful, staying at the winery so that you can't get far without him noticing. He'll cancel his plans elsewhere and make sure he's never more than sight distance away from the building. With time, he'll have to leave, and when he does, he'll probably invest in some very high quality locks to keep you in. Should that prove to not be enough, he'll have to use chains to keep you attached to the wall, instead. Needless to say, it's difficult.

If you manage an attempt, he'll be angry, sure, but he understands why. The first time, at least. Don't push it. If you manage to keep trying, his sympathy for you will slowly erode with each successive attempt, and soon he'll run out of mercy, and decide maybe just forgiving you isn't enough, and you actually need to learn a lesson to prevent this from happening again.

"Again? You really... Really don't give up, do you. This is the fourth time now... You've really pushed it, you know, I've tried to be nice. If you're not gonna get that, I'll make you understand."

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

Canonically speaking, he's fairly good at predicting the actions of others. He's clever like that. However, he's not the best at reading faces. As far as lies go, he will detect it maybe 80% of the time, but you can probably get away with a bit - once he catches you doing it once, though, he'll suspect you from there on out, and be much less likely to buy your lies.

When it comes to manipulation, he's one of the ones where it's like, he kinda knows, and lets it happen anyway, if it's for the sake of you being happy with him. That, and he's just flat out weak to your smiles and begging for little things. He's got his limits, though, so you'd be wise to only use this sparingly and not push it.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

Protective to the maximum degree. Probably the worst of genshin boys.

Absolutely zero contact with the outside. No family, no friends, he might even go to the extent of faking your death to ensure there's not even anyone who will look for you.

Unlike Childe, Zhongli, or Albedo that I've mentioned as allowing you for walks or outside visits... That's not happening with Diluc. No, he's insanely protective, to the point that you very well might not see sunlight again, except through a window.

And he gets that it can get depressing, he really does, it's just the one thing he can't do. He'll try to substitute it, get you nice large windows to let the sun in that you can sit in front of - provided he's there - and maybe after a while build a little screened-in porch for the winery that you can walk around on - again, provided he's right there. You really can't expect him to let you out there when you're alone. What if someone saw you and tried to hurt you?

You get the feeling it's less about keeping anything else out, and more about keeping you in, though.

He's actually good about letting you do things for yourself, though. He won't restrain you from cooking or kitchen utensils or anything like that, unless you do something stupid like try to hurt him or yourself, in which case it'll be a revoked privilege.

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

Initially, he tries to go easy on rules, as part of his attempt to make you more accepting. He'll keep you more restrained for the first little while, and later on you'll be allowed to walk, but certain sections of the building will be off limits. He's fairly simple - be obedient, stay inside, don't try to fight. He'll invent new ones based on your behaviors as time goes on, but for the most part, he doesn't want to control you too much.

He fears getting too mad and making you scared of him, so, he struggles to punish you initially. He's probably willing to let quite a bit slide, but once he senses you're taking advantage of that, he'll put an end to it. Once again, he can thank the fact that he's naturally intimidating - he'll grab your jaw and force you to look at him, and honestly, just the look on his face is enough to send chills down your spine. If you're persistent, he's not able to leave you all alone and isolate you, no, he can't handle being away from you for that long. He'll appeal to the punishment of boredom, tying you to one spot and giving you nothing to entertain yourself with will get you to crack in a fairly short amount of time.

Humiliation works well, too. You're all alone except for him, you don't need clothes. So if you want them, you'll have to behave.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

This man only has to look at people to send them running. He's very grateful for his scowl once he realizes the power it holds. You'll be none the wiser as to why everyone you meet seems to end up avoiding you, why people get nervous when you approach, why you can walk into a public place and it will clear out within minutes of you walking through the door. It's ok, though, since you have him to go to for your problems. He'll shrug and tell you he doesn't know why it happens to you, but it's no big deal, you don't have to worry about it, because you don't need them anyway, right?

He's not above having chats with people either. If they're not driven off by the glares, he'll give them another chance by spelling out very clearly that they should back off.

With persistent offenders, though, he has to come up with other means. He's not a delusional, and he knows deep down that this is selfish, that they're not really doing anything wrong per se, but his anger is violent and ultimately overrides any guilt. He'll find a way to make them out to be criminals, spies, or some other form of bad person, and they'll meet their fate at the hands of Mondstadt's mysterious nighttime vigilante.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

His default personality is... Irritated. He scowls a lot, he gets exasperated easy - even if he tries to be a bit more pleasant for you. His irritation is so common that seeing genuine anger is a bit rarer.

When he does, though, it's one of the worst. To really, really make him mad, you'd have to be exceptionally, intentionally bratty to the point of antagonism - he's understanding and lucid enough to understand why you fight him, why you try to run, but do it over and over relentlessly, or just be a childish brat and ignore his warnings, and he'll snap. His voice bellows when he's mad, it's deep and terrifying and echoes off the walls, his eyes narrow and he stomps heavily with every step. He'll grab you by the arm hard enough to bruise, and if you refuse to follow and dig your heels in, he'll just roughly swing you onto his shoulder and carry you.

He has to exert the anger in some way, though. He's not like some yanderes that can be talked down or calmed, or are going to go easy on you if you apologize and beg. Once the anger is there, it's there until he physically takes it out in some way.

So they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

It depends, really, because he's highly lucid, so he has very little delusions about you. Unlike many of the others, he's willing to acknowledge your mental competence, and if you're intelligent and have life experience he'll acknowledge it. He won't recognize physical capability, though, since you're nothing compared to his strength. If you are a capable, independent person, he won't delude himself into thinking otherwise. It will, however, have a negative effect, probably the opposite of what you hope for - he's going to feel a bit intimidated by it, really, because if you're capable and independent, you don't need him as much. He's more likely to find ways to force your dependency on him, if so, but deep down he knows you're an equal on a mental level, and it's frustrating.

Now, otherwise - if you're a little more on the ditzy, airheaded side - it will be below. He's realistic, again, and if you genuinely do fall into the category of being naive and a bit dumb, he'll recognize it. He feels more secure in your dependency, and he's more likely to baby you this way, and will absolutely be more protective.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

He really wants you to. He's not sure if he deserves it, though. He's acutely, painfully aware of how awful the things he's done are, and to top it all off, he knows that he should wish he was a better man that had self control, yet... He doesn't. He can't lie to himself and pretend to even have a shred of regret, even if he feels guilt. If he hadn't done all those things, you wouldn't be here with him like this, and even though he knows it's selfish, so very, very selfish, knowing that the horrible things he did got him the result he wanted makes it worth it. And given the opportunity to go back, he'd do it again.

He wants you to genuinely love him, and even though he struggles with human affection and communication, he'll try his best to be sweet to you, say nice things, try to be less irritable, try to talk more.

But if dependency, isolation-induced attachment love is the best he can get, well, that's still love.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

He likes to just... Spend time in your presence. He's still ultimately not much for talking, he runs out of things to say very quickly and even if you're not talking, he's very very happy to be around you. If you're being cold towards him even, he wants to just sit there and be beside you, if you get up and sit on the other side of the room, or walk to another room (provided you have the privilege to do so), he'll follow you wherever like a little lost puppy and just silently sit right back down next to you again. He soaks in your presence like sunlight, it makes him happy.

If you show him affection, especially after an abduction or when stockholm syndrome starts to set in, it's one of the few times you'll see him smile. His smile is soft and faint, and it's less his mouth so much as his eyes that seem to light up. If you show him affection, you can eventually reach a very vulnerable, very soft side of him. He keeps up walls for everyone else, and he kind of desperately wants someone he doesn't have to do that with, so he'll crumble to your affection fairly quickly, once he's assured of your love.

Also, he's one of the ones who fully understands why you're mad. He gets it, he's lucid, and he honestly knows how awful what he's doing is. He still hopes you'll get over it, though, and if confinement and isolation except for him is what it takes to achieve that... So be it. Rather than justifying his actions, he acknowledges what he's done, but he's aware that psychologically, he's already long past the point of no return, and he can't bring himself to stop.

“I know this wasn’t... what you wanted, and, I know it’s, I know this was really, really bad, but I only did it for your sake. If you just... try to get used to it... maybe you can be happy, if you try.”

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

High, but embarrassed as all hell. He likes to maintain a very respectable and serious image, and people knowing that behind that neutral poker face is a brain running through nasty, nasty fantasies would not be very conductive to that image.

And that's what he does - working the bar gets very, very slow sometimes, and there's not much to do but sit around and let his mind wander. The more bored he gets, the more involved in these fantasies he becomes, and sometimes you might have to tap him on the shoulder to snap him out of it.

He feels guilty, really, for how he feels about you, and he knows that it's wrong and violating... But. But if you don't know, it won't hurt you, now will it? Nothing about the fact that he just thinks about bending you over the bar tables and fucking you raw is going to actually do anything bad. It's harmless.

He won't be touchy or perverse towards you by any means, and while that's nice, it causes something of a... Buildup. A lot of urges and needs have gone unmet, a lot of desperation to just feel you skin that has never been filled, and the thing about buildups is that when you reach a certain point they'll eventually burst, which is going to be what happens once you're in your new home.

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

He's moderate. He'd like you to want it, he's not highly sadistic and doesn't get off to your struggling/crying the way Childe or Kaeya would. But, in the end he's very set on what he wants, and if you're not open to it, he's not going to wait long. As aforementioned, he's got a lot of pent-up need that has gone unchecked, and while he normally strives for self control, at the point of kidnapping you, he's built up enough sexual frustration that he's not going to be very patient. Again, he's not going to be mean about it, he's more the type to just kiss your forehead and mutter a few reassuring things, even as you hiss at the pain of being impaled. That's another issue - he's convinced you might just be intimidated by the size, so he'll keep reassuring you that it's not going to last long, your body just needs time to adjust, even though you feel like you're being split in two.

He's content with knowing that, even if you mentally aren't wanting it, your bodily reactions show that you're clearly not repulsed or anything.

He's also another one to use that very thing against you, much like Albedo. He can feel you twitch and clamp down when you're close and he'll tell you that if you love him you'll cum, and if you don't love him, you won't. But no amount of trying to bring yourself down is enough to override the overwhelming stimulation.

He's also one to get rougher/more intense with time. At first, he's a bit afraid of hurting you, and he's not entirely familiar with how this all goes, and even can be a bit prudish and reserved. But the more he fucks you, the more and more he realizes he really likes having a sense of control and dominance over you, and just how nice it feels to come home when he's frustrated from a bad day and just fuck that energy out. Once he realizes you're not going to break or anything, you'll notice him gradually getting rougher and harder with time, until it becomes a norm.

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

Stomach bulging/size kink

He's not normally an outwardly prideful person. His pride is more of a silent aloof type of pride, rather than a smug showoff type. He's not one to emphasize his positive traits just to look good. But, fuck, if there isn't something very, very pleasing about being able to physically see his dick making a bulge on your stomach every time he fucks into you. He'll make sure you don't close your eyes, grab your hair and pull your head down so you're forced to watch it fill you more than you can take, over and over.

He doesn't want to hurt you, really, but of all the things to whimper about, you just had to squeal that it's too big, that it hits your cervix, that it's splitting you apart, and as much as he really wants to be a good guy, you're really making it difficult. Hearing that just breaks something primal in him and makes him want to fuck you harder.

It's one of the few things he can actually get smug about, watching you clutch your gut and whimper from bruising and soreness even long after, and as time goes on he might lose enough shame about it all to make a smug comment. He knows he should feel bad. But again, you make it hard to.

Breeding

It's a possession thing, really. There's something so utterly satisfying about just watching cum drip out of you, listening to you whimper whenever you feel it filling you up. It's kind of cute, when he tells you he'll cum inside you and you panic, you squeal and wriggle and unintentionally clench down hard enough to make that happen, you practically just milk the cum out of him when you do.

Forced feminization?/housewife kink/I dont know what to call it but hear me out dammit

He has in his brain this idea of a perfect little housewife and you're going to fit that model whether you want to or not. When he breaks into goes back to your old apartment to bring clothes for your new home he'll only pick the most frilly, feminine of all the things you owned, and if you don't have too many, he'll buy ones for you.

He just likes the idea of having a nice, sweet little wife to come back to, especially after being so stressed with whatever bullshit he's had to put up with that day. Really, any darling in captivity is kinda sorta filling that role, but he's got a very specific image in his mind of you being very... Domestic. Submissive. Frilly little clothes and aprons and cleaning things and making food, it's very cute and gives him a weird sense of dominance that will inevitably turn to arousal - something about the whole ownership and submission aspect of seeing you walk around in those clothes, doing your little chores makes him really want to grab you and bend you over the nearest surface and just - well, you get the idea.

And he's not gonna listen to your whining, either, even if you're a naturally tomboyish person. You could have been the roughest adventurer there was out there, all ragged and getting covered in scrapes and climbing mountains and fighting monsters, but that's in the past, now. Now, is time for you to give that lifestyle up, in favor of a better one, one that will make you happier... if you just let it.

How do they feel about pregnancy or babies? Do they want them?

He's yes and no, but mostly yes in theory. It fits into his little housewife fantasy and he feels it would be a good way to keep you attached to him. It would make you less likely to leave, it would give you something to do all day, you'd be happy. He's a bit worried about his own capabilities, though. He's not super empathetic and he's not very talkative. Ultimately, it would probably end up an accident that results from the aforementioned breeding kink.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

Another one kind of like Razor, he's not gonna think it out too much, but holy fuck, if he's mad, just fucking feels like a punishment in and of itself. You'll realize just how much he's holding back on the regular when you see what it's like when he hold nothing back. It's bruising, it's brutal, and it's a little frightening to witness that kind of raw strength. He'd be one to pick you up into the air completely, holding your whole body up with his arms, forcing you to cling to him so as to not fall while he bounces you up and down on him. And really, once you account for the affect of gravity, so it's slamming into you at unprecedented force, and fuck, it's likely horribly painful, even if that pleasure is still there.

If he's exceptionally mad, he's another one willing to belt you, and while he'll certainly get off to it, it's something he'll only do when he genuinely has a reason to punish you.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

Thighs. He likes hooking them over his shoulders, grabbing the fleshy soft parts with his hands, running his hands up and down the sides. One day, one you're comfortable enough, he'd really like to just lay his head down on them like a pillow, they look so soft. And he loves looking at them too, loves things that show just enough of the curve of your hips to your legs and the soft skin underneath.

#fellow diluc simps rejoice #for i am here to feed thy needs #yandere x reader #yandere genshin impact #yandere diluc #tw: noncon #tw: dark content #tw: misogyny #sorta?#chr: diluc

910 notes · View notes

quarthly · 3 years

Text

Twilight characters as random animals that I think are oddly fitting

(Also yes, I am roasting the animals as well)

Edward: He would be a Cheetah. Now I know, seems like a cop out just because of his speed but hear me out. Cheetahs are, at face value, pretty cool. They used to be my favorite animal as a child, but then I grew up.

Cheetahs, through no fault of their own, are severely inbred. Now thats mainly because of poaching, but the cheetas anxiety also comes into play. In captivity, cheetahs are usually given emotional support dogs. I will admit it is cute but it negatively affects the population. Excluding one in the wild, cheetas can be to anxious to breed and thats not good for conservation efforts.

Cheetahs can hit up to 80 miles per hour in a couple of seconds. They are designed for fast running and agility. Their claws are similar to that of a dogs for better traction and they have elongated spines for longer strides. They have a thin build, long legs and a long tail for balance.

This has downsides though. Many times after making a kill, it will get stolen for them by larger predators. Thats right, they get absolutely bodied by the other animals. I should probably make these shorter but I'm on a rant now, so I guess this will be semi educational.

Throughout the series, we see Edward over estimated his abilities and value, constantly getting bodied by others. He's essentially a perfect mormon, though thats on S'meyers. He constantly judges others, dehumanizing them to their baser flaws, without doing any self reflecting. Him viewing himself as a monster doesn't really count to me. While he definitely hates himself, the only thing he is truly demonizing is being a vampire.

Bella: Picking up from Edwards, Bella is a Chocolate Labrador. Yes, she is his therapy dog. I feel like this is really fitting for her. I know Golden retriever would make more sense, as thats the most common breed for service animals. However, I kind of focused on her appearance. Only at first though! I just know that Edward raved about her human qualities and that would pass over as animals as well. Her chocolate eyes and brown fur, very average and boring. Thats essentially Bella. Even Edward wasn't into her until he got a wiff. Labradors a very loyal dogs and while they have more personality than Bella, I just couldn't shake it. Their also very stupid. Ok that's kind of mean, they're not stupid but when it comes to love, then yeah they are stupid.

I used to have a lab, loved him to death, but god he was something else. Very much danger prone, from their own stupidity or their lack of survival instincts. I know that labs are almost aquatic. They love water, swimming, all that jazz. We can just say that bella has a few screws loose in her dna and is just "not like other labs."

Rosalie: Now she was hard. There are quite a few animals that I think would fit for her. I'll list the other ones, but that one I went with is the Swan. Like Edward, seems a little on the nose, but I have my reasoning.

I was going to pick a predator for her, as she is shown to be very vengeful and viscous. I would have pick some type of cat, most likely a purebred, from a rich family. It could still work, but the swan just speaks to me on this one.

Swan's are known for being beautiful, graceful, and are pictured as the symbol of love. They are also very vain. Edward constantly brings up Rosalies vanity. She was constantly valued for her beauty as a human, so of course that crossed over in the transformation. She was raised to be married into wealth, she was used as a bargaining chip to increase the family's standing.

Rose has a very strong character and makes her opinions known. She's assertive and aggressive at times. She's not afraid to get dirty.

Swans mate for life and like geese, are known for being great parents. I was also going to choose geese as an option for the maternal instincts. I was wary at first because swans can be really aggressive. Like actually, you think geece are bad? Yikes bestie...

I was conflicted because swans are known for drowning dogs and sometimes people. However, I can actually see Rose drowning Bella. It's not that unbelievable lmao.

Emmett: Now this one is just ironic. I only associate him with bears. Its inevitable, but picking a Grizzly or Black bear is too obvious. So I went a slightly different route...

So I was going to pick the Sun bear just because of looks alone. Like, I'm not exaggerating, it looks like someone wearing a bear costume. I don't think it fits him but I know for a fact that he would dress up as a sun bear and sneak into a zoo to see if anyone would notice. I'll put a pic of it here

Like look at this thing. I have no words...

Anyway, what I picked was a Sloth Bear. Now Sloth bears are mostly nocturnal, which either way works consider vamps don't sleep. Their diet is also odd but honestly so is the cullens. They're native to the Indian subcontinent, and are known for being aggressive towards humans. Its said that for the most part they're pretty calm, so I think its just fear of humans that make them act aggressively. Honestly, that's a good thing because they are listed as vulnerable on the IUCN Red list.

They have some similarities with sloths, which is where they get the name. They have long claws and unusual teeth. They are known to hang upside down from tree branches, and is described as having a messy appearance. Honestly, Emmitt has a messy personality. Sorry bestie but you're a lot of work.

Now heres the biggest reason for choosing this bear. Aside from Baloo from the jungle book being a sloth bear, they are known to run fades with Tigers. Honestly, how fucking badass is that!? Now I don't think there are recorded instances of a Sloth bear killing a Tiger, but when push comes to shove, they can hold their own and I find that incredibly impressive.

Carlisle: This one was somehow the easiest as well as the toughest. I know Owl seems like the obvious choice, and I can see it. However, I believe Carlisle values emotional intelligence as much or if not more than academic intelligence. He is so charismatic and values other's above himself. He might not be as Saint like as Edward thinks, but he does try and I think he genuinely cares about others. For that reason alone, I choose a Elephant.

Elephant's are very social animals and are extremely intelligent. I could rave about them for ages, I love them so much.

Now elephants live in a familial unit and are usually matriarchal. Bulls usually are on the outer edges of the herd or form little groups with other males. Honestly, they're not that bad aside from when their in musk.

In the group of males, the elder ones will teach the younger where to get the best food, water, how to use things as tools, and every other thing that will increase their odds of survival. This is really cute to me tbh, they do this because the females usually choose the older males because they've proved that they are intelligent and strong, that they have survived and will continue to for awhile. Teaching the younger males these things are to make the odds of them getting chosen to mate more likely. The whole unit just reminds me of a father that has to deal with rowdy teens.

Carlisle likes to take in strays, he might not have a herd but he will make one and teach them to thrive. That's how he envisions it anyway. He just has a found family and is trying his best.

Esme: Now this might seem like an insult, but I promise it's not! This is in no way misogynistic. I love cattle and ever since I took animal science in highschool, I have appreciated these grass puppies like they deserve. Call me Castro because I love cows.

Yup! I chose a Cow for her. Specifically a beef cow. That might sound weird but its because beef cows have higher maternal instinct than dairy cows. I'm thinking Scottish Highland based on vibes alone.

They are nicknamed the Gentle Giants of Scotland. Super maternal and sweet and ugh look how cute they are!

Esme came from a abusive marriage and had just lost her child, she was depressed and desperate. Her changing was, in a way, salvation. She just fits in. She adopts all these strays along with him and will protect them to the death. She might be gentle by nature, but don't fuck with her family. She lost her first one and she isn't going to lose this one.

Alice: She's an odd one. There are so many possibilities and maybe I'm biased, but I feel like she would be a Crow.

Ok listen, I'm definitely biased but it just feels right. Crows get a bad rap, they are so cool! They are so intelligent and have the ability to actually sit and think about the past, prest, and future. I forget what its called, but this was only seem in humans! Maybe other apes, I can't remember exactly, but either way its awesome. They do live in groups, or murders, and remember people and faces. They remember locations and are able to pass down information through generations. They essentially have their own language! They are able to use tools too!

Alice's story is really sad. When we first meets her, it revolves around the death of her mother and her institutionalized. She was essentially tortured and forgot everything from her past. All she had was the future and even that wasn't constant. Crows a often viewed as omens, they are associated with death. I personally believe that instead of being the cause, they just know something is going to happen. They are very inquisitive and can be creative.

If you befriend a murder of crows, sometimes, depends or the group, they will bring gifts. Its can range from food to shiny metals and colorful plastic. Hell, I think I've seen a post of one stealing things from people just to gift it to their human.

Alice's love language is gifts. Even if they are focused around fashion, she still goes out of her way to get something that will look good and at least be a little comfortable. By that I mean she tends to forget peoples comfort zones, but she means well.

Jasper: Honestly not to sure what to put for him. I know a predator would be more fitting, but for some reason I can see a donkey working. I know, seems like I'm clowning on the confederate. Fair, but I'm serious about the donkey thing. Honestly, it would be perfect if it wasn't a herbivore. Porcupine would also work.

Being a predator would make more sense. Given his backstory and his characterization, it wouldn't make sense for him to be a prey animal. Usually I wouldn't count this, but given his gore filled past and trouble with the diet, it seemed fitting.

I see him as a Big Cat. Honestly, vamps in general just give cat vibes. Jasper though especially have some cat like qualities, which originates from hunting and being a soldier.

I specifically see him as a Mountain Lion. Aside from him being blonde, he just has the predatory stealth to him. In midnight sun, we see him use his gift to make the nomads overlook him. He's honestly really powerful.

Mountain lions are known for being stealthy with an air of grace and power to them. They are stong animals. And I mean strong. They can jump 40-45 feet.

They're very elusive and quite. They stalk their prey and tend to attack from behind but don't think they won't hold their ground if need be.

Jasper was changed during the Civil War and forced to fight in the Newborn wars. He was a soldier as a human and as a vampire. He's able to feel and manipulate others emotions. He's covered in scars and is very intimidating.

He still struggles with the diet and honestly I hate how the others handle it. Like they have no room to talk. I don't want to defend the confederate but it just pisses me off. He has to deal with his hunger on top of everyone else's. Like damn, besties always on edge! Everyone doubts him which I don't think helps any.

Also, Mountain lions and Cheetahs can purr!

@aquanova99 I'll do a Volturi one too. That one will be fun lmao

#twilight saga #the twilight saga #twilight au #bella swan #edward cullen #carlisle cullen #esme cullen #jasper hale #jasper cullen #alice cullen #rosalie hale #rosalie cullen #emmett cullen #the cullens #the volturi #honestly look at the muscle definition on that thing #jesus chriiiist

71 notes · View notes

andnofcksweregiven · 3 years

Text

ASL

Pairings: Jeff Wittek x reader

Warnings: none that I can think of- weak ending though

~btw I don’t know what it’s like to be deaf or lose your hearing, this is purely based off what I’ve heard from people I know who are going through this. I’m sorry if it isn’t 100% right.~

Synopsis: Losing your hearing at a rapid pace is scary, almost as scary as finally telling someone.

You felt petrified. You get taught to handle all types of situations whilst growing up- for instance, how should you react when there’s a stranger who won’t leave you alone. However, this, this is something no one has ever prepared you for.

80% of your hearing lost, slowly over the course of 2 years and progressively getting worse- hiding your hearing aids under your hair, a beanie or hood. Luckily it was easy to hide from your friends, especially with the hearing aids getting the percentage to 50.

At the back of your head you knew there was no point of hiding it, your friends would still love you and have your back but there was something keeping you from saying anything. Maybe it’s the fact you hadn’t processed the idea yourself- at some point you’ll be completely deaf. No music, no morning chirps from the birds, not hearing anyone's voices.

Currently, you was situated on the floor cross legged and flipping through different flyers for sign language lessons. Suddenly, a vibration on your thigh snapped you out of the stress induced coma. A notification was lit up on your phone screen, Jeff. A name that caused a smile to tug at your lips but fill your heart with guilt and sadness.

Jeff and you have always been honest to each other- no rock unturned, no secrets unsaid (well almost all secrets) everything laid out flat in front so there was no surprises.

Jeff

~ i’m coming over in 10

y/n

~ and who said you could

Jeff

~ i did.

~don’t you know i’m a v.i.p ;)

This was it. An opportunity to share this with someone. Where you actually going to take it? Hell no, it’ll make it too real. Quickly, you started to gather all the flyers and rushing to a nearby draw to hide them, to busy to notice your door unlocking, to busy to realize that you had put your hair up into a messy bun, to busy to notice your bestfriend standing at the door until a loud forced cough cut through the air.

You turned and slowly looked up into his brown eyes, soft and light like the personality he tries to hide. A wide pearly smile adorning his face however slowly going down as his eyes left yours and darted left and right.

“y/n? umm” he lightly licked his bottom lip still staring at your ears “y/n why do you have hearing aids?”

“Oh you know, trying to set a new trend. Like how people wear fake glasses to look cool even though their eye sight is great” the laugh that left your mouth felt as bitter as the words you spoke.

“y/n/n...” finally his eyes were set back on yours, cautiously making his way over to you until you felt his large frame engulf you into an embrace, one you desperately needed. Clutching onto the front of his shirt, tears escaping and staining his shirt. “Come on y/n/n, you really think I don’t know when you bullshit me?”

“Well, kind of, I did bullshit for 2 years”

Pulling back, his arms keeping you far enough to stare deeply into your eyes “What? y/n what the hell? I thought we was the type to share everything, no rocks unturned and all that?”

Guilt flooded you, hearing an almost broken voice coming from his mouth until you got hit with the realization- this isn’t about him, this was a big secret, a scary one, and yet he’s trying to act like the worst thing is that you didn’t tell him.

You shoved Jeff harshly away from you, furious at him for even trying to make you feel like shit for not mentioning it. “Hey Jeff, news flash, maybe I didn’t say anything because I’m scared. Maybe I didn’t say anything because I’ve still not processed the idea that I won’t be able to hear your annoying voice or Nerfs heavy breathing. But hey, lets just talk about how it must suck that I didn’t say anything for 2 years, and how difficult and hard it must be for you” Sarcasm laced your voice.

“y/n I didn’t mean it like that I just-”

Before he could finish speaking, you spun on your heel and headed to your room “just leave me alone Jeff”

“y/n”

“No! Go away Jeff!”

“Fine! I’ll go, I’ll leave you alone, obviously that’s what you want!”

“Yeah it is, that is what I’ve been saying isn’t it?” The slam of the door closing behind Jeff reverberated off the walls of your now suffocating apartment. This wasn’t what you expected, this wasn’t how you imagined things going once someone found out.

Over the course of a month, you were still avoiding Jeff and his futile attempts to contact you. It wasn’t that you was mad or hurt by what had transpired in the apartment, it was more embarrassment if anything. Your reaction wasn’t completely fair on him, he was your bestfriend who thought you would tell him everything- big or small- so of course he’d be taken a back to find out something had been happening for 2 years.

When you weren’t avoiding Jeff, you was busy with day to day tasks and additionally you’ve finally chosen a sign language lesson to attend. They’ve managed to teach you the basics and given you booklets with pictures to be able to practice at home. Usually, you’d practice most of the time early in the morning when you couldn’t sleep properly, almost like clockwork at this point.

You were currently sitting on your soft duvet at 4 in the morning, mimicking the picture in your booklet whilst occasionally looking up at the long mirror opposite the foot of your bed. Caught off guard, you heard a faint rapid knock on your apartment door.

You trudged out of bed, slightly exhausted from staying up so many hours, and cautiously opened the door only to find Jeff standing, disheveled and almost as exhausted as you- maybe more.

“Jeff, what are you-”

“Just listen ok?” he said with a graveled voice which was like comforting music to your ears, after weeks of not hearing it. ”Ok?” he asked again, you nodded.

“I know you’re scared and, fuck, I’ve been thinking about it and I’d be scared too, so I’m sorry for acting like me not knowing was the worst part- because it wasn’t. The worst part was you going through it alone for so long, the worst part is you thinking you have to go through it alone so I want you to know that-” his signature hand movements changed, as he focused solely on his hand placements.

“Jeff, are you trying to sign to me?”

“I, umm, yea I am” Still focused on how he’s moving them around.

“What are you trying to say?” a slight humor in your voice as you stared at his hands and back at his face, were his tongue slightly stuck out whilst he concentrated.

“I am signing that I love you right?” his voice carried a worried tone as his head shot up to gaze into your eyes but cut short when you burst out laughing. “What’s so funny?”

“Jeff I- You just-” Tears brimmed at the corner of your eyes as you struggled to breathe. Finally, you were able to compose a proper response. “Jeff, you just signed I fuck cats!”

“The hell, do I look like Shane Dawson!?” That broke you both as your laughter's filled the hallway, obviously waking up your neighbors.

That night, everything went back to normal. Jeff and you staying over at each others to watch films (now followed by learning sign language), the texting/ facetimes, the long drives with music- except Jeff started to blast them at full volume and teaching you to feel/ recognize the rhythm with your feet on the dash of his truck. You weren’t alone, and all the rocks were finally unturned and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

#jeff wittek #jeff wittek x reader #jeff wittek imagine #jeff wittek fanfiction #jeff wittek imagines #jeff wittek x y/n

238 notes · View notes

in-tua-deep · 3 years

Note

Ok I totally want to hear more about this survivors au/Delores is real! How do the siblings handle having this different version of Five? Five may be better adjusted but he still has to heard his family around like a bunch of stray cats. What happens when Hazel and Cha Cha show up? How do they find out that Vanya causes the apocalypse and how does Five handle that revelation?!

here is the thing, i think the survivors au has the potential to be HILARIOUS

no one knows how to handle a well-adjusted five, and this absolutely includes the commission

So you mentioned Hazel and Cha-Cha?? Five in this au was not nearly as absolutely feral as he is in the show bc he knows how to interact with people - he was raised by a competent adult and a weird best friend and they occasionally saw other survivors as well

please picture old Five hanging around the water cooler and chatting with Hazel

the other funny thing is that Five is competent passing - he is well adjusted emotionally but functionally?? Hazel is out there complaining about dental being cut and office parties and budgets and Five is there sipping his drink having never filed taxes in his life. Five doesn't know what the fuck a dental plan is, he was a child soldier and then lived in an apocalypse.

So please picture for me Hazel being like "okay I know corporate wants us to keep what we're being paid to ourselves but fuck that, workers unite, what do you get paid as a legend old timer?"

and five is like "you're getting paid? i get to not get tossed back into the apocalypse, I think"

"but what about expense forms? what about medical care?"

"I'm like 80% sure i'm being experimented on, actually." Five says nonchalantly, "Don't get me wrong, my idea of medical care is fucked by being a child soldier but I'm pretty sure regular people don't have electrodes attached to their heads every time they get a checkup. Could be wrong though! My ex-dad used to monitor my brainwaves while I slept so like, my idea of appropriate shit is fucked, you know?"

This is a Five who was raised by Rick, he is polite to his coworkers. If Dot asked him if he wanted to grab lunch, Five would have gone and grabbed lunch with her or politely said that he couldn't.

Cha Cha only ever talks to Five when she wants to talk shop, so they've had a couple of conversations about weapons but not much else tbh, Hazel just tends to be more personable

So when they're sent after Five, Hazel is much more hesitant to kill who he perceives as a "work friend" and also is definitely thinking about all the times Five casually revealed a way the commission was being highkey shady about him, such as the potential experimentation, no pay, working under duress etc. He's much more easily turned against the commission because he's even more primed to say "fuck the commission" than he is in canon

Hazel out here like "how did Five break his contract when Five wasn't even being paid? I kind of want to read it."

Hazel out here like "I would unionize if I didn't think the commission was anti-union enough to send literal assassins after me if I suggested it :/"

meanwhile with the siblings

Five just. talks over them a lot and makes so much sense that it's actually really hard to argue with him, and he's weirdly considerate of his family's obligations

Like Diego is like "i have to go see Patch" then Five is like "that's great I'm proud of you buddy, it would actually be really handy to have some law enforcement read into the situation if you think she's up to the task. that goes for everyone by the way! If y'all have people you trust, more bodies would be super helpful I think"

the entire family, collectively, who have like zero trusted social links: uhhhhhhhh

Diego, with this weird permission, probably?? Does? Awkwardly attempt to read Patch into the situation? Patch is, obviously, like "what the fuck, Diego" but probably goes with him to the mansion (????????) because she's concerned and then meets his fucking whacko family with their superpowers and suddenly everything is 100% more realistic

Five is just like "yes hello I'm aware I look like a child, i'm actually in my late 50s or early 60s (apocalypse time amiright) because of time travel stuff. Yes I am Five Hargreeves who went missing in like 2002 or whatever. anyway it's lovely to meet you, i'm so glad diego has someone he trusts, and considering my sibling's shifty looks when i told them to invite anyone they trusted this genuinely makes me concerned that Diego is the most socially well-adjusted of them."

"That cannot be possible." Patch says, like someone who has met Diego Hargreeves.

"You haven't met the rest." Five says sympathetically, "In our defense we were raised in isolation as child soldiers."

"That... explains so much." Is all Patch can say to that, "But you seem..."

"I'm adopted." Five waves away.

"We're ALL adopted." Diego grits out, very aggrieved by this and also not sure if he likes the fact that Patch seems friendly with Five, or at least is listening to him?

"I'm double adopted."

However! With the recruitment of Patch, herding Diego becomes like 90% easier.

Honestly the worst to herd are probably Luther and Allison? Luther because he's Number One and resents Five taking charge and also resents Five's casual dismissal of Reginald and also suspects that Five (or at least the commission) has something to do with Reginald's death?

Allison because she is torn between following Luther and helping him and helping Five but also calling Patrick and Claire at every possible moment while ALSO trying to repair her relationship with Vanya. She's flighty - she'd bail on a Five-apocalypse-assignment if Vanya mentioned being hungry or if Luther called or anything like that

Vanya likes to be included and, if asked, would probably drop as many current obligations as she can. Like she would probably cancel her teaching if Five genuinely and sincerely asked her for her help, which he does because he's 100% sure Dolores would manifest in front of him and smack him if he dared even imply someone without powers wouldn't be helpful

Vanya is like "I'm not sure if i'll be helpful - I don't have powers ):" and Patch is like "wtf are you talking about - my superpowers are Gun, Backup, and Reading Comprehension and i am like the most useful member of this team right now"

Vanya gets a confidence boost just from hanging out with Patch honestly, I think they should be friends

Klaus is thrilled to be included are you kidding?? He says he does it for money but he's just happy to be there and also as one of the most emotionally intelligent siblings he is mildly concerned about the fact that Five looks like he's about to cry and also emotes

Five also gives Klaus positive reinforcement, hugs, and Five absolutely weaponizes the I'm not mad, but I believe that you can do better and I'm going to give you more chances because I love you and fully believe that next time you'll be amazing way that Rick used on him.

I feel like Five ends up saying something along the lines of "I understand that x is really important, and we're definitely going to look into it. Is it something that needs to be addressed right now, or is it something that can wait until after April 1st? If it can wait, I can write it down here on this list so we don't forget. If it can't wait then we can figure out a time to address it and help you" a lot

Like Grace malfunctioning and potentially killing Reginald?

"We don't have to make this decision right now." Five says patiently, "Because Grace is a robot, we have some options. Living with a robot who is potentially malfunctioning and homicidal is dangerous, but Luther saying that means admitting that Reginald might have made a mistake or error with Grace's programming or upkeep. I haven't been here for a long time, but I remember Reginald being very precise. Regardless, this isn't a choice between permanently shutting her off or not. We can shut her down temporarily until we can fully address the issue. We can ask and see if there is a 'system reboot' option or some sort of system check that Grace can undergo. We can try find and hire an expert to take a look at her programming to find the issue."

Five gives this speech while like, organizing the weaponry in the house on a table very nonchalantly

Five out here making buzzer noises at his siblings arguments like "yeah no that's a false dichotomy and a strawman's argument, want to try again?"

(Look apocalypse nights were long and they had games that were literally about arguing pointless shit like ranking types of chairs or the best way to break out of a prison without powers and things could get heated)

"Who died and made you boss?" Luther demands.

"Uh, the world? Were you not listening?" Five asks, looking very purposefully confused.

It gets even MORE delightful when Five reads Rick into the situation because a) he promised and b) his siblings really have like, no connections jeeze

Rick fully believes that this is his son from the future, like Five introduced himself, but Five skipped out on a few key details. Such as being adopted.

So Rick spends a solid chunk of time just staring at Five, who looks basically nothing like him, trying to think like, who is his mother ???? if we save the world will Five stop existing? why would I name my child 'Five'? Does everyone have powers in the future? was there like... a radioactive apocalypse? would radiation give future humans superpowers? when did my life turn into a comic book? am i even allowed to ask these questions? will knowledge of the future fuck things up?

and then when Five comes back and is like "what is up everyone this is my dad Rick who will be joining us, he doesn't have any memories of me thanks to time travel but if anyone is mean to him i WILL kneecap them"

"Your DAD?"

Five does kidney punch Klaus for saying that Rick is a DILF but otherwise everyone just is like, warily looking at this Normal Dad Man in confusion because?? This is the dude who raised Five, who they watched take out like an entire commission team by himself yesterday? He looks so. Normal.

Rick is very confused and like, wonders if he's supposed to be the team mascot? But Five keeps involving him and asking his opinion and in return Rick enforces snack breaks and makes everyone sandwiches and has gentle talks with everyone

Every time Five notices someone about to blow he just lovingly makes sure that that person is alone in a room with Rick

Luther ends up crying on the sofa with Rick gently patting his back as Rick calmly states that Luther seems like he's put a lot of time and effort into his family and making his father proud and that since Reginald isn't here to say it, Rick will have to be the one to say that he's proud and that they've been dropped into a difficult and stressful situation - so soon after Reginald's death when they're still grieving! - and he's doing so well

Luther, experiencing unconditional positive paternal regard for the first time in his life: i don't know why i'm crying so much

honestly this is just a comedy of juggling the gang, having impromptu therapy sessions and discussions, investigating the apocalypse and the eye, leonard trying to meet vanya continuously and failing because she's constantly surrounding by family or rick/patch, the commission trying their best to bust up the dream team/isolate Vanya/kill or remove Five, while Hazel lives out his romcom dreams with Agnes and also says "fuck the commission"

#HUH?#survivors au #well adjusted five au #long post #far tua long #five recruits rick to be team dad #rick is DEEPLY confused #but he's the kind of person that rolls with it #dolores probably ends up tagging along as well on at least one occasion #dolores and patch bond #five pretends that dolores is a new sibling and not his dolores #five calls rick 'dad' and it messes with everyone else #patch is on team fuck-the-apocalypse(-and-reginald)#vanya is never alone so fuck leonard #five finds out that vanya causes the apocalypse and is like #vanya: HUH?#luther: maybe we should lock vanya up -#rick: are there are any other possible actions that might be more appropriate in this situation?#vanya: i could try get more meds to take and we could address the powers thing after april 1st #vanya immediately gets validated that reginald sucks #even luther who has had multiple conversations with rick is like 'dad... didn't always make the best choices...'#everyone: :0 #hazel doesn't kill patch so he probably joins team anti-apocalypse at some point #hazel: why are you a child #five: oh you know i'm young at heart and all that #OH forgot to mention one of the main differences in this au is that five like properly grew up this time #so while he is inconvenienced by his body he's not so deeply uncomfortable or angry about it #just resigned #'this might as well happen' - five #five probably makes jokes about it as well

125 notes · View notes

emma-d-klutz · 3 years

Text

IF I were to write a Maribat fic

It would be mostly a played for comedy and drama take on “Marinette picked up this whole Bat thing way too quickly.”

Like, post Miracle Queen, Marinette is just overtaken with so much guilt about Master Fu and is also desperate for a new mentor to be a replacement and a distraction from the blame she puts on herself and the burden of being the new Guardian. She is absolutely sure she is not ready to be in charge.

She calls Damian and asks for an audience with Batman. Damian is like, “Oh, isn’t this the girl who kicked me out of Paris? What was it you said? ‘No Gothamites in my city.’ Isn’t that what you said? Didn’t you say you can’t have our “type” of vigilante in Paris, because we’re too, what was it, overemotional? Is this that girl who is on my com right now? The one who rejected joining the Teen Titans? That’s you? You want me to TALK to my FATHER? I would barely ask him a favor for someone I actually LIKE.” Except then she kind of blows up at him and tells him the situation, and Damian gets real quiet and listens, and he feels a little sick because he’s remembering the Ric Grayson situation and also Alfred’s most recent death, which he ALSO blames himself for, so like... they got shit in common. He says he’ll talk to Batman about a video call.

Cut to three months later, Marinette has just THROWN HERSELF into being Batman’s disciple. She calls him Master. She practices fighting day and night out of the suit, and IN the suit she uses her powers for training and is often seen sprinting for miles or scaling the Eiffel Tower with only her upper body strength. She comes to school covered in bruises and with the darkest circles under her eyes, and her friends are WORRIED, they really are, but she’s like 80% less bubbly then usual, so no one is really confronting her and are just silently wondering what the heck happened. Most people assume that this has something to do with her taking Adrien and Kagami being an official couple really hard.

For fashion design, well. Marinette has gotten really into armor lately.... huh. (It’s because the Batfam encourages her to not rely on a magic suit that can turn off at the worse time, and she is convinced she must be prepared to be Ladybug at any and all times. If anything, she’s lamenting that she doesn’t know how to make weapons.) (She got a grappling hook styled like a yo yo as a present from Master Bat.)

She texts Kagami out of the blue one day like, >>Hey. Come over. I am in the process of making my masterwork >>Oh and bring a sword >>A sharpened one, not a training sword And Kagami comes over to see a twitchy (”ok that’s pretty normal”) super serious (”well that’s not. she’s usually so flighty and indecisive”) Marinette. And in the place where there was once an Adrian shrine and stalking schedule is now what seems to be a Hawkmoth shrine and stalking schedule. Marinette brings out what looks sort of like shiny silk with jewels woven in, and Kagami’s assumption is corrected. No. It’s a polymerized titanium she synthesized herself with light elemental defense crystals woven in by hand. Marinette is very proud. It’s a prototype. She plans on making a material that can be beautiful formalwear and as stab-proof as any kevlar. But it’s still a prototype so Kagami can you pretty please do some slashing and stabbing on it pretty please? See she wants it to be really good before giving it to her other Sword Friend, because Dami is a really harsh judge, and her motivation just won’t be able to take it if she gets notes from him this early on in the process. Kagami is actually really on board and helpful in this venture.

She does like indirectly ask Marinette if she’s heartbroken of if she’s with Luka or what have you, and Marinette just gets really harsh and says she has other priorities. She also makes some grandiose proclamation that neither of them are good enough for Adrien, because Adrien is pure goodness, he’s kindness and forgiveness personified, and it’s just... it’s just... it would be really clear to anyone who has ever heard Batman wax poetic about Superman where she is getting this highkey cringe behavior.

She’s on video calls with Batman all the time. They definitely have a conversation that goes something like this:

“I am certain the mean girl from my school is working for my main supervillain.” “Good. You can find him through her.” “Yess! I have been looking forward to the chance. I am going to interrogate her.” “Ladybug, no.” “I am going to tie her up with my yoyo and dangle her over the highest skyscraper in Paris and tell her I’ll drop her if she doesn’t tell me the identity and location of Hawkmoth.” “Befriend her at school and track her movements.” “Ok but wouldn’t it be quicker to dangle her off a building?” “You’re letting your emotions about someone from your civilian life interfere with your judgement and letting yourself act hastily and with negligence, which is exactly how you lost your first mentor.” “Ah....... you’re right. I’m sorry, Master. I won’t be reckless.” “Good. Tap her cell phone.”

As for Chat Noir, he is FREAKED OUT by her change and all the secrets she’s keeping now. And her behavior towards him has REALLY changed. Well not too much, but it’s noticeable in a way that unnerves him sometimes. Like she’s become a super serious workaholic, but she’s also insanely protective of him, to the point where he feels a bit resentful that he’s not being treated as a competent partner. He’s really trying to get Ladybug to talk out what she’s going through, and he’s anxious all the time that she’s on the cusp of becoming akumatized. Honestly, he’s not wrong on that part. He knows that this is all because she blames herself for Master Fu, and he is also aware that she is spending much more time in contact with that Robin from Gotham who they met once or twice, and he knows she’s keeping some secrets, but NO he is not aware for at least half of the story that she is being remotely trained by Batman. She’s telling him to shut up a lot more and bossing him around more and seems to know way more about Hawkmoth’s movements than him and it feels like he’s out of the loop, but she’s also, like, often spewing out how important he is to her as her partner and keeps giving him handmade pastries and saying, “An army crawls on its stomache,” so like honestly wtf mixed signals much

Batman agreed to mentor her temporarily and has been trying to find someone else from JL to take over, preferably Wonder Woman or Flash, because he agrees with Ladybug’s assessment that to be a hero in Paris it is necessary to have weaponized optimism, or Zatanna or Shazaam, because they could train Ladybug in her magic hopefully. He is told several times that it would be easier to get her mentorship if she agreed to join Teen Titans or Young Justice, which of course they all know, so thanks, but Ladybug would def refuse to leave Paris and her partner, so her joining YJ isn’t really up for discussion.

Flash said that she’s great but that, “She’s SUCH a Bat,” and that clearly she’s so attached to him that she should just stay one of his. Batman asserts that she is only being like this because she is desperate for a mentor, and if someone else took her on, she’d probably/hopefully change again just as fast. Flash says he isn’t so sure, and that at this delicate point in time, being handed off to someone else might, like, retraumatize her or smth.

Ladybug literally started breaking fingers interrogating someone.

It is on camera.

The LadyBlog is in SHOCK.

No one knows what to do.

Even Hawkmoth sees the video footage and is like, “Jeez, am I... Mayura, are we in over our heads here? Did we break the teen hero? Is this our fault?”

Anyway, those are all my favorite ideas of the ones I’ve daydreamed so far. There is also stuff about how she interacts with the other members of the Batfam and that she uses the Horse Miraculous to travel to Gotham to be trained in hand-to-hand and also to just sob for hours and scream at things because she CAN’T let her emotions out like that in Paris and the bafflement of the Batkids like “you... came to GOTHAM... to NOT repress your emotions. um, k.” And Cass loves her and thinks she is Baby Sister and if someone is mean to baby sister in front of her she will stare into your soul until you are quiet ect ect many ideas.

The reason this is an IF and not a WHEN:

dudes I have no plot

176 notes · View notes

studyvibes · 3 years

Text

Hello guys so I thought it would be nice to translate an interview with Maneskin which is originally in Russian.

Thank you @teatrodellavita for sending me the link for the interview ❤️

So to warn you all before you read the translated interview, this is translation everything from Russian to English so all the maneskin answers were basically translated x2 (Italian -> Russian -> English) so there might be some Chinese whisper/telephone effect. Also I struggle with Russian idioms/metaphors so I’ll note them if they are during the interview.

I’ll leave the link here so you can follow the time stamps all of the questions. Also I tried my best making a nice structure which was hard because this whole post was written on tumblr mobile app

https://youtu.be/16NIbGDcycI

youtube

(I’ll be writing in personal notes to explain some parts in italic and bold)

So the video starts with the host making a parody of 80s Italy video promoting a vinyl. I am not sure, correct me if I am wrong, but I think that’s a reference to their New Years special episode. I skipped parts of the host talking because I don’t see it relevant to the Maneskin interview. Also I’d like to note that if you want to compare the host he is similar in hosting style like Jimmy Kimmel, he trying to ask questions with a bit of humour

[2:02] Host: Our guest, the winners of Eurovision: Maneskin!!!

[2:08] Maneskin performing I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE

[4:59] Host: Maneskin!!! *clapping*

Damiano: Thank you

Host: Thank you! Grazie! (Says other random Italian phrases, which I don’t know how to spell)

[5:21] Host: I was informed that on Yandex Music in our country (YandexMusic is a streaming service) you became more popular than Billie Eilish. You are the most popular band/group in the country based on streaming your music.

Host: Tell me how do you feel about Billie Eilish? Are you happy that you surpassed quiet singing woman from America (he didn’t mean it in harsh way more like a joke way)

Victoria: Poor Billie

Damiano: We really like her. There isn’t any competition with her, it’s not that important. But we are happy that our audience is here.

*audience clapping*

[5:55] Host: (said something that I couldn’t hear because of the clapping)

Host: You know, thanks to you we noticed how much in TV and Russia we see rarer and rarer people come/visit in leather and lace

*audience laugh in the background*

Host: And honestly speaking, looking at you we realize how much we miss it, we lack it, you have very very beautiful costumes/outfits

Damiano: thank you very much

Host: it just lacking blue and then a bit we’ll have a russian flag

*audience laugh*

[6:31] Host: what are your thoughts/feelings of Russia? What are your thoughts/feelings of meeting your fans? Where did you go? You are already a couple of days here, what did you like?

Damiano: Very pretty. It is very rare when we could go for walk, we saw the Red Square. The public is very warm so we appreciate/it’s very nice.

Victoria/Damiano (Not sure if this translated part was from Victoria or Damiano): We received a lot of Vodka as gifts

Ethan: and chocolate

Host: In this country you are the first people to receive vodka as a gift. (I think it’s sarcasm because I know a lot of people who received vodka as a visitor/ gifted vodka for visitors)

*audience laughs*

Host: but it’s ok, maybe it’ll become a tradition.

[7:04] Host: Tell me, a bit, for all of us who know you after the Eurovision. How was the band created? Who first joined the band. Am I right that Thomas, Victoria, you *pointing Thomas and Victoria* you first then Damiano joined? Tell us

Thomas: We went to the same school, and during that time we met each other. Then Damiano joined our band and then we made the band. A lot of different people came to us - we were looking for a soloist and drummer

Victoria: and during that time Damiano joined us.

Victoria:We choose Damiano because he was the only who could actually sing

Thomas: and then later Ethan joined the band. We found him *pointing at Ethan* on Facebook

Host: So you wrote something that you are looking for a drummer right? How did it happen? What did you write, what to write so I can join you as the 5th member with accordion

*audience laughing*

Ethan: Accordion is a bit difficult instrument *audience laughing* to use in rock music, but you can send us your resume, we will look at it.

[8:35] Host: We have a question from our band called ‘фрукты (Fruits)’ which is performing already 10 years. So the question is: you, just like the band Fruits, started from street performing, right? Like outside nearly at the streets of Via de Corso in Rome?

Damiano: Yes

Host: When you performed outside did you already wear the same costumes/outfits? How much as an estimate did you earn a day? It’s very interesting, a lot of bands will travel to that street, to repeat your journey.

Victoria: We dressed worse

Damiano: We dressed the style of hippie, but we earned a bit of money. One time, one boy came up and dropped for us 20 euros. It didn’t matter on the day, and one time a guy/young man came up and dropped 50 euros in to our box.

*Host pointing at himself proudly, audience laughing*

Victoria: So it was you!

Host: Oofcourse

Victoria: We thought we saw your face somewhere before.

*audience laughing*

Host: Of course guys, I left the boutique and thought hmmm what do I do with useless money, ofcourse.

[9:50] Host: Also about the band Fruits I just can’t not say it, Damiano, when you turn to your profile, *asking camera men to move the camera close up to the soloist of the band Fruits* *we see her side profile* I think during your childhood you both were separated, you look so alike. Damiano, maybe you have relatives in this country.

Damiano: *Damiano laughs*

Damiano: Maybe

*continues laughing*

Host: maybe, maybe

Damiano: It is possible, my dad was in Russia. *Damiano starts to laugh more, audience and laughing and clapping, camera goes on the soloist of the band Fruits smiling looking shy/embarrassed*

Host: She has the exact same story, her mother was visiting Italy

[10:23] Host: I can’t stop talking about your costumes/outfits (positively). And that you returned us faith/hope in Italian music in our country, which we really really love here, but also faith/hope in rock music. You are a group which uses more than one guitar and doesn’t used a drum machine and suddenly became very popular that we grateful for you because the word rock appeared and returned thanks to you.

Host:It is clear that you love rock music which is now considered the past rock and know the history of rock music. If you were offered to be able to go to a concert from the past, from any band, where would you want to go? Each one of you

Damiano: maybe the performance of Queen, would’ve been fun to see

Host: Victoria, which band and which performance?

Victoria: hmmm...possibly David Bowie, his tour.

Host: Ethan?

Ethan: If it was possible to return in the past, I would’ve traveled to the Woodstock

Victoria: he has has there contacts/ connections

*Damiano imitates smoking and laughs*

Host: oh I can’t repeat that after you

Host: and Thomas?

Thomas: I would go to the 70s for Jimi Hendrix

[12:00] Host: Where do you buy your clothes? Like from the basics, so I arrive to Rome and I have more than 50 euros, thank god, and I want to buy clothes. Where do I buy the clothes?

Maneskin (I wasn’t sure who’s comment the translator translated): just in the stores

*audience laughing*

Damiano: There is nothing funny *Damiano smiling* It’s true *He starts laughing*

Host: I’ll be honest I haven’t been in Rome for a very long time. But it’s in vintage stores right?

*Maneskin agreeing*

[12:30] Host: I have a very important moment, it is that you for the first time..mm.. finally brought back what we all missed and exactly that is bright and beautiful, outlined dignity male makeup on stage. Speaking of this..... talking veryyy slow so they can translate them quickly... speaking of this, I have a small favour/request ... *he kinda goes of track for a second* who does the make up, do you do it yourself?

Maneskin: no no

Damiano: no we have makeup artists, actually one makeup artist, very talented, well done. Between all of us, Victoria is best as makeup.

Host: Yeah, but with Victoria it’s understandable, it’s clear that she start trying makeup sooner than you did.

Host: I have an offer, imagine you don’t have your makeup artist and you have a person who urgently needs makeup applied. I would like to ask if you, Damiano, and the member could apply the makeup on my face? I honestly don’t know what you need to apply to makeup *he is opening palettes of makeup*

*Damiano stands up walking towards the host

Host: (in English) Thomas if you wanna, you know help, please.

*Thomas joins Damiano*

Host:(back in Russian) Victoria you can hint them

Translator: She (Victoria) said that you (Host) choose the wrong helpers

*audience laughs*

Host: Yeah? Then come join

*Victoria and Ethan join*

(Ok here it goes messy cause they are all talking and the translator instantly translates so I might have mixed up)

*Victoria points at some makeup product (can’t see which one)*

Host: This one?! Victoria...

Damiano: wait, I’ll go first, first add a bit of eyeliner

*Damiano applies eyeliner under the eye of the host*

Victoria: you started under the eye, you should’ve started from the top

Host: *joking* I’ll also always start with this line

*Victoria smiling shakes her head, audience laughing*

Damiano: Its the type of makeup you wear when you go grocery shopping

*Audience is laughing, host tries not to laugh while Damiano is applying eyeliner on him*

Host: I was actually planning to go grocery shopping

*Thomas and Victoria start applying eyeshadow on different parts of hosts face*

Host: Sto-wha- already other parts being applied?

*Audience laughing*

Host: Ok guys... but..

Host: Ethan is it ok? Your the only one I can trust in this group

Support host in the background: he’ll need to be returning home (as a joke implying he needs to look decent when he leaves the studio)

*Victoria applies makeup on the host lips*

Host: Also lips?! Hmmm

Ethan: you look good

Damiano: close your eyes *applies upper eyeliner*

Damiano: (in English) I don’t know what I am doing

Host: (in Russian) you don’t know what you are doing? No, that’s too late to tell me.

Damiano: (in English) that’s why we have a makeup artist

Host: (in Russian) no, wait, now your make up artist will say why am I even needed by this band.

Ethan: just a final touch *applies eyeshadow on the tip of the hosts nose, and walks away with two thumbs up*

*host laughs and then picks up mirror to look at the work*

Host: not bad guys, to be honest, not bad.

Damiano: (in Italian) No it’s true, look how pretty he is, very pretty

Host: guys I want to tell you one thing: never fire your make up artist

*audience laughing*

Host: Thank you for your visit and we are very grateful for your performance

Host: And what can I say, we are waiting here and with the whole company will to you concert. Grazie mille

————————————

Ooooooff that took wayyyy longer I planned, it was hard because I had to relisten some parts to know who actually said, like it is easier when it’s only one person cause I get to translate quicker.

Anyways, hope you all enjoyed this translation, if you have any maneskin interviews in Russian or German (warning: my German is a bit ruff from lack of practicing) which you would like me to translate, message me :)

#maneskin #måneskin #maneskin interview #thomas raggi #damiano david #victoria de angelis #ethan torchio #maneskin damiano #maneskin thomas #maneskin victoria #maneskin ethan #Youtube #my translations #my post

37 notes · View notes

heich0e · 2 years

Note

liv… any advice for writing a fanfic? See I have so many ideas but when they’re actually typed out, there’s a voice saying “what the actual fuck are you saying.” 😭

oh wow bold of you to come to me for advice!! of all possible people!!

here are 3 things that help me personally, but idk if they're actually sound advice (so user discretion is advised!)

1. Outline

If you have a plot idea, it helps to just get all of your thoughts out in one place. As you shape it out, you can elaborate on the details you're sure about, and highlight the places you know you still need to work on/develop.

This also helps to get a rough idea of pacing/plot structure that you can work from. Outlines are great for me because if I'm struggling with a particular scene, but know what I want to come next, I can just move ahead and come back to the part I was struggling with after the fact!

Having the outline as your guide (but not your bible! nothing is set in stone and you can always go back and make changes to it later!) makes the entire process easier, especially with long, multi-chaptered writing.

2. Don't get bogged down by it!

Listen, not enough people say this, but life is too short to let fiction that you're posting on the internet for free ruin your life (or at the very least make it worse.) I see this happen to content creators all the time and it kind of boggles my mind.

This can look like a lot of different things but some big ones that stick out to me are to try not to pay too much attention to engagement. Don't get me wrong, it is amazing to feel that your work (that you have put a part of yourself into) is being seen and APPRECIATED by people. But if you start measuring the success of your writing (and this goes for EVERYTHING else too - Art! Playlists! Other things I can't think of right now!) by the number of clicks/likes/whatever it receives after you post it, then you will ultimately stop finding enjoyment from the process of creating it. I have seen people get so wrapped up in their engagement that it's like they hate the actual process of creating, and see no value in it beyond the way it's received. I just think that's so sad.

Don't feel that you owe your work to anyone but yourself!

Get halfway through writing a fic and find your inspiration/enthusiasm for it gone? That's sad, but it's ok! It happens! Put it on the backburner and work on something that you're feeling passionate about until you feel ready to come back to it. It's not a crime.

which brings me to 3. Write what you want, when you want to, primarily for yourself

If you've read anything I've written/follow me, you know I constantly have like 80 wips on the go - and there's nothing wrong with that. Some of them may never even see the light of day! But I write them because I enjoy the process of taking a little seed of an idea and tending and caring for it and turning it into something bigger, even if it never gets to its fullest form.

If you have a fic idea, and you enjoy writing, then write it!!!! There is absolutely nothing to lose, and writing, like anything else, is a skill that you develop with practice. If you're not confident in your writing abilities, the only way to improve them is to do it. You can always go back and edit later - editing is a seriously undervalued part of the writing process imo.

I don't know if any of this was useful or if I was just waxing poetic. I hope I didn't come across as self-righteous at any points, I just really and truly think that writing is something that everyone who is interested in should try. I am by no means a great writer, I just write a lot. Hope this helped even a little bit, and I hope you write something soon!!

#liv got mail

12 notes · View notes

omg-im-such-a-masochist · 3 years

Text

🎲 🍀 WHAT’S YOUR BET? 🍀 🎲

Prompt: Y/N is lucky enough to have her man Roman at home for a few days, but she sees her luck start to change once she has a video game to overshadow and only a pair of dice as her allies.

Word count: Girl, grab a snack..Longer than it should

Pairing: Roman Reigns x Reader

Warnings: +18, adult content, smut, cursing, masturbation(male receiving), oral sex (female receiving), thigh riding, sex dice.

My Roman’s lovers: @ziasaph, @mindofasagittaruis

Notes: It’s Roman y’all, that’s all I’m gonna say on my defense! Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

“Ro, how long more are you gonna stay playing that damn thing?”

“Just give me 10 more minutes babe, if I drop it now, my team is gonna loose” He said with his eyes glued on the TV.

“You’ve said that 10 minutes ago!Every damn time is this bullshit. I swear to you that some day I’m gonna toss that thing on fire!”

“I love you too babygirl” He blowed me a kiss without taking his eyes off of the TV.

“Argh” I let out a frustrated groan and went up the stairs to our bedroom.

Roman was home, on one of his very rare days off, and instead of being together making up for the time he was on the road, he’s been glued on that fucking video game of his with his cousins!

Generally I don’t mind him playing that boring thing, sometimes I even encourage him to play because I know how much he likes it and it’s sort of relaxing activity for him. But damn! He’s been home for two days now and I didn’t get not even one bit of love since he got here! I’m frustrated, upset and horny which is a quite deadly combination for anyone, really.

Is it too much to ask for a day with the man that you love, who’s been on the road for 3 weeks straight, for some quality couple time ALONE? I miss my man! I miss being in his arms, I miss kissing him, I miss the make out sessions, I miss the sex (heavily), I just want some dick damn it! His dick, buried deep inside of me! Ok I over shared, but I’m an adult woman with needs and I want my boyfriend to fulfill those needs! Am I the only one who thinks I’m not asking for too much?! Usually I don’t mind taking care of business with my own hands, but he’s home now, and I don’t want the battery operated fake one if I have the real one right there, on the living room, playing video games!

As soon as I entered the bedroom, I saw a little pastel pink bag with a huge bright pink bow on the floor near the wardrobe.

*Oh Amber’s bachelorette party gift. I never got to look at what she gave us...I remember she said some of those things were old but gold..*

I sat on the bed and placed the little bag on it, I opened and started to dig into it, removing item by item.

There was penis shaped pasta “Maybe I should cook that for dinner” I laughed to myself.

Some edible panties “Damn it Amber, that’s so 80’s girl!” I chuckled.

A beautiful purple lingerie set

“Uh, those are nice! And looks expensive too” I looked at the tag and was shocked by not only the price (salty as fuck) but also to see that it’s the correct size “How on earth did she knew that?!”

Lumberjack porn, in DVD! “Yep, definitely stuck in the 80’s! Oh well, old but gold she said, she didn’t lied tho” I cackled

Strawberry and chocolate edible lube. I opened the cap, squirted some out and gave it a lick. I was actually surprised how good that actually tasted!

And last but not least the most old but gold items of all time: A Pair Of Sex Dice!

I took it out of the package and red the words. On one dice there were actions “Lick, Bite, Kiss..” and on the other one were body parts “Lips, Thigh, Neck..” on both dice however, there was a question mark, which indicated that the person could choose the action or body part.

As I hold the dice in my hand an idea roamed my head.. *Oh baby, since you like to play so much, let’s see what you will think of my little game...* I thought to myself as I made my way downstairs to the living room.

I could see that he, obviously, continued with his eyes glued on the damn TV. So I made my way towards the couch and stopped a few inches away from him.

“Roman?”

“Son of a bitch! You killed OUR guy Jay! He was on our team, you fucker!”

*Of course he didn’t listen to me* I thought

“Roman?” I almost yelled

“I’m sorry baby girl, I’m gonna wrap it up in 15 minutes, I promi- What the fuck? Pay attention man! He almost killed you!” He yelled on the headset’s microfone.

“Would you like to play a game with me?” I asked

“Sure thing baby, just let me finish this level ok?”

“But I wanted to play now..”

“Huh...Why don’t you go on and I’ll be right behind you in a second” He ferociously tapped the buttons of that cursed thing, without even once looking at me.

“Oh well since you don’t wanna play with me...I’ll find someone else to play with, I guess..” With that I threw the pair of dice at him and it landed on his face before hitting the coffee table.

“Fuck babe! Why did you do that for?” He looked down to see what I had thrown at him. “Dice? What is-“ he stopped once he saw the sayings on it and looked up with a smirk on his face.

“Oh, so I finally get you to look at me for the first time in those two days huh?” I said with a bitter tone. He chose to ignore me and asked.

“Was is this?”

“The game I wanted to play with you, but since you’re so focused on your own little game, I’ll go find someone else...who actually wants to play with me.”

I turned around and was walking towards the stairs when he said.

“Oh, I’ll be damned if you play this with someone other than me!”

I turned around just in time to see him desperately take off the headset, turn off the TV, the PlayStation and walk towards me with the dice in hand.

“So baby girl, where do you wanna play?”

“Here” I turned and made my way back to the large couch. He followed and sit down beside me.

“How you wanna do this babe?” He asked with a mischievous smirk

“We’ll take turns, each one will have 60 seconds to do the action, the first one to call for mercy loses”

“Ok, and what does the winner gets?”

“Whatever she”

“Or he” he smiled

“I wouldn’t bet that sweetheart! Whatever SHE wants”

“Are you really that certain you’re going to win kitten?”

“Absolutely!” I proudly smiled

“We’ll see about that baby girl..”

“Who should start?”

“Please baby, ladies first!”

“What a gentleman huh?!” I scoffed

Before I could throw the dice, he leaned forward and said with a deep, low voice.

“Just remember baby girl, all’s fair in love and war” he then proceeded to maliciously wink at me. And he knew the effect that had on me, the fucker was going to play dirty! Well, bring it on then!

“Oh you’re so gonna regret that Reigns!” He just lightly chuckled at me as a response.

I threw the dice on the coffee table and looked at the results.

“Kiss, Lips. Ok that’s a soft start” I said as I made my way closer to him. I kneeled on the couch, in front of him, set the timer for 60 seconds and pressed play to start the countdown. I threw my arms around his neck and gave light pecks on his lips to tease him, when his arms locked around my waist and pulled me closer to his chest I deepened the kiss, he opened his mouth so my tongue could pass through, which it happily did. He groaned into the kiss and tried to move me closer so I could straddle his hips...buzz buzz.

The timer went off and I reluctantly pulled away, returning to my previous place on the couch. When I looked at Roman he had a famished look on his face.

“Your turn Reigns”

He took the dice and toss it on the table without breaking our gaze. Once the dice fell into the table he took a peek at it and smiled amused with what he got.

“Bite, Neck. Oh baby girl, this is going to be interesting..”

*Fuck! You have got to be kidding me! As if I wasn’t sexually frustrated enough!* I thought. If there was one thing that could turn me on in mere seconds was anything neck related. Specially if Roman was the one doing it!

“Come here baby” He patted his lap

I straddle his hips, sitting on his hardening bulge. He pulled my hair to the opposite side of my neck and hold it there to keep it in place.

“Start the countdown kitten”

I pressed start and he leaned forward towards my neck. He started by lightly biting at the base of my neck and made his way torturously slow up. Once I felt his beard scratch my neck I couldn’t help but moan softly. I could feel him smile against my skin, then his biting became slightly rougher, his beard scratching harder, and successfully wetting my panties. When I thought I couldn’t take it anymore of that teasing the timer went off and he lightly pushed me out of his (now very hard) bulge.

“Are you ok baby girl? You look a little flushed over there” He chuckled

“Shut up Reigns! Two can play that game, you know that right?” I said slightly annoyed

“Oh feisty” He mocked me “Give me your best shot kitten!”

I rolled the dice.

“Uh! It looks like I’m in luck.” The dice stopped at ‘Thigh’ and a ‘question mark’.

“Let’s see what you’ve got baby” He lazily smiled

I made my way to his thigh and thought of how I could give myself some temporary relief, when an idea crossed my mind.

I sat down on his thigh, in a riding position, and pressed start on the timer. I begin to ride his thigh first at a slow pace that firmly started to increase it. The friction between his thick jean clad thigh and the thin material of my shorts and lace panties created was perfect.

I looked into his eyes and could see how he was trying to hold himself from griping my hips. I could see his jaw was clenched and he was harder than ever as his erection pressed agonizingly against the zipper of his pants. My breathing became shallowed and I managed to get at least some relief before the timer went off.

I returned to my original place on the couch looked into his eyes and asked

“Want some mercy Reigns?” I cackled

He just stared at me before saying in a frustrated voice

“You know that was a low play you just did, right?”

“What? You were the one who started this with the neck teasing. I just went with the flow, you said yourself all’s fair in love and war, I’m just following your lead.”

He tossed the dice quite furiously at the table, once he saw the outcome he couldn’t help but evilly grin at me.

“Lick, question mark. What word do you think I should put on that question mark, huh baby girl?”

“Roman, don’t you dare!”

He crawled towards me like a predator to it’s prey.

“Pull your shorts down baby” He whispered

“Roman, you’re playing dirty right now”

He reached me and whispered in a low voice.

“Take off your shorts now or I’ll have no problem in ripping them off ya.”

I lowered my shorts to my ankles, Roman then took it on his hand and toss it behind his shoulder. He grabbed my thighs and opened them so he could place himself between it, once he did, he pulled my soaked panties to the side looked up to meet my gaze before saying

“Start the countdown kitten”

I pressed start on the timer at the same time he buried his face between my thighs.

He licked non stop from my entrance to my clit, once he was satisfied with that he begin a sweet torture of licking, sucking and biting my clit, until he had me a moaning mess.

Just when I was close to my release, the timer went off.

Roman groans in frustration and reluctantly get up. He goes back to his place looks at me and say

“Mercy?”

“You wish Reigns” I rolled the dice, and saw a quite fun combination

“Touch, question mark... Oh isn’t revenge a bitch, Reigns?” I laughed

“You know that if you touch my dick I’m gonna cum in less than 60 seconds, right?”

“Well, you can hold it”

“Oh no baby I cannot! I’m so rock hard ever since you rode my thigh, and as if I wasn’t turned on already, eating you out made it even worst! I’m about to explode at any minute now! So just know that, if you touch my dick, the way you always do, I’m 100% gonna cum.”

I reached him and once again straddle his thigh, I leaned to his ear and whispered

“Start the timer big dog”

“You really gonna do this, huh?” He asked breathless

“I’ll take a lucky shot babe”

He pressed start on the timer. I pulled his zipper down and opened the button of his jeans, I reached my hand inside his boxers grabbed his delicious hard on and pulled free.

The head of his cock had a thick bead of precum and I used as lube to slowly stroke his dick. I needed him to be more slippery to stroke as I wanted to, so without thinking twice I let go of his boner and with that hand I touched my pussy to collect some of my own wetness, so I could stoke him the way he like it. Once he saw what I just did Roman groaned loud.

I removed my hand from my panties, and grabbed his cock again stroking at a slow pace but with a tight grip. The mixture of both of our wetness made it perfectly lubed up to give him a pleasurable handjob.

The timer went off and I was about to remove my hand when he barked at me

“Don’t you fucking dare to remove your hand!”

“But the time is up” I batted my lashes innocently

“I don’t give a fuck about the timer or this stupid game! I call for mercy”

My eyes widened in shock, Roman was always so incredibly competitive, he hated to lose, even at the most stupid things. So him just giving up was a sign that the man was crazily turned on.

“Really?”

“Really kitten! I don’t give a fuck if this means that you’re wining, the only thing that I want right now, is to feel your sweet pussy wrapped around my cock”

I was already so turned on from those 3 weeks build up, that I just got up from the couch to remove my panties, straddle his hips and positioned his cock at my entrance.

Roman pushed himself in quite forcefully and gave me no time to adjust to him.

He pounded merciless against me and we both filled the living room with loud raw moans.

I placed my arms around his neck and he locked my waist with his arms in a ferocious grip as we roughly kissed.

Our pleasure was so strong that I came with an almost scream and him with an inhuman growl.

As we tried to catch our breaths, he stroked from my ass cheeks to my thighs and I nuzzled against his neck, before looking up and say

“Isn’t my game way more fun than yours?”

“No doubt baby girl! I could never disagree on that!” He chuckled

“Does that mean that I can stop to dispute you with your cousins and that damn video game every time you come home?” I made a poorly job at hiding how hurt I was, so of course he noticed

“Oh kitten, I’m sorry! It was never my intention to make you feel like you have to dispute me with anything or anyone. I was so caught up on the simple pleasure of having some time off that I didn’t realize I was neglecting you baby. I love you, and you’re the most important thing in my life! I’m sorry to make you feel that way baby girl, I promise you that from now one you’ll never see me playing games when I’m home ok?”

“I don’t want you to stop playing your video games, I know how much you like it, it’s just...I don’t wanna feel like you’re eagerly coming home just to play video games all day long.. I wanted you to eagerly come home so we could be together, than after that to play your video game.”

“And that’s exactly how I feel baby! I just did a very poor job at showing to you, but”

He got up from the couch, with me still attached to his hip.

“Don’t you worry kitten, I’m about to show you just how much you mean to me”

He then made his way upstairs to our bedroom, tossed me onto the bed and said.

“Spread your legs baby girl” As he leaned his head down...

Oh boy, I could’ve never been happier to bet all my cards on those dice.

#roman reigns one shot #roman reigns x reader #roman reigns #roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns smut #roman reigns imagine #wwe imagine #wwe fanfiction #wwe one shot #masochist writes

234 notes · View notes