#i am having a fucking stroke wtf is going on

[myriadsystem]

I want him to see me in his sex dreams AND his nightmares.

#personal #guess whos goin thru it again? it me #come to my party with someone elses hickies on your neck? bitch at least have the courtesy to buy some fucking foundation wtf #i sleep til past midday just to make more of the day go by when im a wake up at 7am kind of person #but youre too busy threatening other people in videogames with your own life to notice or care. your boke up with me because #i threatened my life. and you can just koke about it in game? to strangers? #i knew this boy was as fucked in the head as i am but like. sometimes it just aligns the exact wrong way and this is one of those periods #i hope whoever gave you that hickey fucking dies of the most painful and prolonged stroke in medical history right before you see them next

[arminsumi]

I COULD DO THIS FOR HOURS

G. Satoru — さとる ⋅ fem reader

🔞 mdni / mdnr / smut / n.sfw / 18+ content

NOTE: i took a 3 am thirst draft and made it a fucking fic wtf 🥴 i'm so dizzy over this one idk why i usually don't drool for my own smut but god damn this one is special to me. ik i post a lot about gojo atm and it's because i love him no apologies 👍

SUMMARY — making a cheeky comment leads to a long, steamy session in the bedroom with your husband, who's got a point to prove.

WARNINGS — nasty smut 🤤, rough sex, namecalling/nicknames (b*tch, good girl, baby, dirty girl, sweetheart), he's kinda mean, hubby gojo, multiple rounds, unprotected sex, multiple creampies, messy/sweaty sex, daddy kink, p*ssy kiss (1), long session (3h), overstim, dirty talk (teasing, sweet, mean), incl. aftercare, lmk if i have missed smth thank u

WORDCOUNT ≈ 1.3k

PLAYME — daddy

🍒 — J ⋅ reblogs and comments help a lot ! enjoy reading :)

Your husband didn’t like that cheeky comment you made about his stamina and how fast he cums. He thought you were being pretty hypocritical, considering the fact that you cum sometimes solely because of lazy clit thumbing and shallow strokes.

“ Baby, careful what you say to me. “ he smiled at you in the kitchen, serenely washing the dishes after dinner. “ You know damn well that I could go for hours straight with no breaks. The only reason I don’t do that is because you’re too weak to handle it. ” he boasted confidently.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes at him. That scepticism pissed him off so much that he stopped cleaning the dishes and violently threw the towel down. Your giggles rung sweetly in his ear while he scooped you off your feet and tossed you over his broad shoulder, strong build carrying you to the bedroom like he was on a mission.

He threw you down on the bed with the same force that he threw the towel down with, his hands quickly finding his phone and setting a stopwatch.

You were already giggling apologies, but he wasn’t listening. He tossed his phone onto the bed and dented the mattress with his weight as he climbed on top of you, feverish kisses nearly knocking the wind out of you.

“ I’m sorryh – mmf – ‘toruh – didn’t meanh ih – I’m sorryyy. ”

“ Save your sorries and spread your legs. Gonna have to be a little rough with you, angel. But you like that, huh ? Yeah ? Like it when daddy’s rough ? Mhm, I know. Probably like it when I’m pissed off like this, too.

You smiled. “ Yeahhh, I love it. ”

He smirked. “ Dirty girl. ”

Folding you in half and sinking his cock inside you, it felt like he was your enemy for a second with how he beat up your gummy walls with his mean cock; you were giggling and squirming about his playful roughness in the beginning, but now? You’re screaming, going dumb and limp. It makes him chuckle.

“ Fuck, baby, just look at you. ” he cooed, “ . . . just cumming over and over on this dick like a dumb bitch. I told you that you wouldn’t be able to handle it, didn’t I ? Uh-huh. I fucking told you so. Keep it together, it’s only been twenty minutes. Haha . . . and you were the one talking shit about my stamina ? Come on, apologize to me. Good girl. Tell daddy how sorry you are – haha, you cummin’? Yeah, ‘can feel your pussy fuckin’ pulsing ‘round me – fuck that’s good. You like it when I’m mean, don’t you ? ”

“ Y-yesss ! Love it love it s'much Sa—to—ruuuh ! ” you panted frantically, body jiggling like jelly with each harsh thrust.

“ So cute and dumb. ” he cooed tenderly, as if he wasn’t rearranging your guts and breaking the bed.

“ Feel that, sweetheart ? Feel me sweating ? I know you like it when I’m this close, ‘like it when you can feel the sweat drip off my abs ‘n rub against your tummy ? Yeah, I know. Damn dirty bitch. Nah-uh, eyes on me. ‘S only been an hour don’t zone out on me. ”

Really, the concept of time flew out of your head when you were laying there taking him.

You’re shaking, gummy walls and sweet spots being beat up by your husband’s mean, yummy cock. The pressure inside you builds and builds until it snaps, and you scream his name in such a high pitch that it almost makes his ears ring. He laughs a little, watching as you writhe, trapped under his beefy body. He relishes in the feeling of your pussy pulsing as you cum, it brings him close, too. Before you know it, he’s pumping his cream deep inside, pounding into you like he’s trying to ruin your pussy and reshape it to fit only his cock.

“ Fuckin’ takin’ it so well, angel. Now ‘gimme another round. Get on your tummy – there we go, aw your legs are numb ? I don’t care. It’s only been an hour. You can hold on longer than that, can’t you ? ”

From the back, he fucks you so sensually and deeply that the two of you sweat sweat sweat it up. He insistently bundles up with you under the covers to make it extra toasty. The smell of sex is hot and pungent in your lungs, and inhaling yours and his arousal and scent of cum drives him crazy. Bodies wet and slippery, he’s made a sloppy mess of you before but not quite like this; his cheeks dampen, his hair sticks to his forehead; there’s little rivulets of sweat running down the center line of his abs, following along his v-line. There’s an ache in your thighs, you’re getting overstimulated but it’s so good. And listening to his ragged, heavy breathing behind you just brings on another orgasm.

“ Fuck, baby, ‘wish you could see yourself from this angle. ” he groans erotically, brows finally knitting together tightly as he loses composure and succumbs to his own sensitivity. “ Oh, angel, just cum. Don’t hold it in – cum cum cum yeahhh there we go – that’s my fucking girl. Cumming so pretty on this dick. You’re so fucking beautiful, ‘m gonna cum too. Sh-shit look at all that frothing up, feel that ? ‘so gooey and nasty. Hahhh-ahah I’m cumin’ – cumminggg ~ ”

You can practically hear the hearts in his voice when he cums, vocals straining and rasping against the nape of your neck. He lets out this one last primal sound before pumping you full of another load of thick creamy cum. You can feel him pulsing and twitching. He presses his weight onto your back a little too much, you can feel the tones of his sweaty torso and how wet and hot his body is.

“ Haha . . . fuck . . . ” he runs a hand through his hair, smiling down at the pretty mess on his dick. “ Baby, you did so good for me. You okay ? Did I go too hard ? ” he asks tenderly, nuzzling the back of your neck, just listening to your shaky breaths as you come down from your high.

“ I can’t feel my legs. ” you swallow, dazed smile on your face. “ So good . . . ”

“ Aw, sorry, angel. I’ve got you, come here. Ooh – where’s my – phone – let’s see how long you endured me for. ”

“ Felt like . . . forever . . . ”

He chuckled under his breath at that and leaned off the bed, reaching for his phone that had fallen right off the edge when he was making the bed violently shake earlier.

“ Ooh ! Baby, we’ve got a new record. Three hours. ”

“ Oh my god, no wonder I can barely fucking move . . . you’re a menace. ”

He smiles cheekily, “ Wanna make it four ? ”

“ Are you crazy ?! ”

“ Yes, of course. Don’t you love me for it ? ” he coos in a sultry voice, coming to press a loving kiss to your damp cheek.

You feel his weight lift off the bed, you tiredly peek at where he’s going and – of course, like the sweet husband he is, he’s getting you a towel. You can hear his exhausted huffs of breath. There’s cream running down your slit, some smeared across your pussy and frothed up.

He comes back into the room, smiling admiringly at your sleepy body. You’re sinking into the pillows, too tired to think.

“ ‘toru . . . ”

“ Angel ? ” he hums in response, slowly starting to clean you up from the thighs up. You feel his big hands massaging the numbness out of your legs.

“ I love you. ”

He smirks and presses a kiss to your pussy from the back, making you giggle. “ Love you too, my girl. No one makes me feel better than you do. Come here. Haha, are your legs still numb ? Should I massage them more ? M'kay, sweet girl. ”

The silence is sweet and long. He's massaging your body, feeling over you like you're his little masterpiece, his little angel.

Then he breaks the silence.

“ Told you so. ” he smiles victoriously.

You groan. “ Shut up. I was just teasing when I said you had shit stamina ! ”

“ I know, but I still hated that you said it and felt the need to prove a point. ”

You snuggle into his chest, making his heart flutter like he's a boy with a crush again.

“ Yeah yeah, point proven. ”

“ Aaand what's the point ? Tell me, I wanna hear it. ” he teases.

“ You can go on for hours. ”

He smiles to himself. “ Damn right I can. Glad my good girl learned her lesson. ”

© arminsumi

Do not plagiarize / repost / translate / copy layouts / etc.

Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.

#mdni #smut #gojo smut #gojo x fem reader smut #gojo satoru smut #jjk smut #jjk x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #gojo #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #satoru gojo smut #jjk #jujutsu kaisen gojo #gojou x reader #jjk gojo #gojo x reader #jujutsu gojo #gojo saturo #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen #satoru #gojo x fem reader #gojo satoru x fem reader

[cupids-chamber]

@. People I would cheat on my boyfriend with.. . ♡ Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Genshin version ## Low quality and low effort slides because finals sucks!

. ROOK HUNT ;

Odd smile or grin, I mean Rook always has this ridiculous oui oui bitch smirk grin on his motherfucking face, but today? It was different. It was more huter-y if that’s even a word. 

The moment you turn away, Rook’s glaring at your pc as you open the slides, as if it’s his mortal enemy.

Bro looks like a fucking hitman with the looks he’s putting out. His facial expression radiates wtf energy.

Aww so sweet, so cute mon cherie..—Now change the fucking slides.

"What's on the next slide my sweet?"

Run bitch run.

Why are you hiding your screen

what is there to hide

you have nothing to hide

what do you even need to hide.

Why hide.

Communication is key :)

. VIL SCHOENHEIT ;

Lowkey glaring at you while you explain the slides, like 'excuse you fuckass am I not good enough for you?'

Will start getting passive aggressive, calm? What is calm? Is there anything truly ‘calm’ in this world?... He’s patiently waiting.. For the slides to load… Standing, posing like your mom outside your door with a sandal core. 

Slowly becoming a nagging housewife as he insults your slow as fuck computer. 

Begins fucking scrolling immediately, legit scoots you over.

Truthfully you're more surprised he didn’t question the picture you choose for the cover but his pacing is lowkey scaring you? You did this on a dare.. And you put a 50 slide gap.. And Vil was going through each slide fast… Hell you even put a compliment on each slide. 

Stroking your little beauty queens ego always worked… except now.. He’s been remarkably quiet.. And that is surprisingly more unnerving and unsettling than anything else VIl could possibly do.. 

Well you’ve done it now.. He’s mumbling.. With gritted teeth, he’s not even glaring.. And frankly you don’t want to see his facial expression. 

And then he starts laughing.. But not laughing in like “LMFAOO LOL SO HILARIOUS”  but more of a lowkey “I’m going to kill you”

“Potato… care to explain a few things?” 

“I- ugh.. um.. have an appointment”

“Not anymore”

. LEONA KINGSCHOLAR ;

Kitty’s got claws, bro finna commit a crime.

Just looks at you and smiles. ‘I control my emotions, my emotions don’t control me’ core 

Was therapy working? Probably not his lazy ass avoids them like the common flu.

You saw his expression soften for a moment and you lean in and give him a hug. Effectively distracting him.. and then you scroll like God’s given you 20 fucking seconds to live and breath.

“WHAT THE FUCK HERBIVORE??” and then the screen fades to Malleus.. 

And then it automatically scrolls to Rook...

"..."

Oh you fucked up.

© cupids-chamber, do not repost, plagiarize, translate, or adapt my work without prior permission and or confirmation.

#rook hunt #rook hunt x reader #rook x reader #rook #leona x reader #leona kingscholar #leona kingscholar x reader #leeona #vil schoenheit x reader #vil schoenheit #vil x reader #vil #twst x reader #twst #twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst fluff #twst fanfic #twst x yuu #twst x y/n #twst x you #disney twst #twst headcanons #twst scenarios #twst imagines #twst rook #twst rook x reader #twst vil #twst vil x reader

[spacebarbarianweird]

Astarion x Tiefling!Tav NSFW

@tragedybunny @tallymonster

Tieflings are one of a kind and have an interesting anatomy, so imagine the opportunities.

Masterlist

Headcanons

Astarion grabs Tav's horns during sex, especially when he is making love to her from behind

Or when they kiss to prevent her from letting go first

Astarion pulling Tav's tail all the time - in private and in public

"No, you aren't going anywhere!" "Astarion, this is equivalent to putting your hand into someone's pants in broad daylight!"

Keeps pulling her tail at any given opportunity because this is the equivalent

Scratching and tickling her tail meanwhile Tav is experiencing a brain melt due to arousal

Especially touching the base of the tail - this is when she is sent off

First, he started to tickle her tail without any background thought (just because he genuinely likes her tail)

Then he noticed Tav whimper quietly, hiding the face in her palms and squeezing his thighs together

"So, it's sexual for you, isn't it?", he chuckles,

If Astarion is willing to continue, he can just carry her to bed and do whatever he wants since Tav's brain is already in orgasmic shutdown

She can use her tail for sexual pleasure as well

Imagine places it can go during sex

And tailjob is absolutely a thing

Tieflings have sharp nails, and Tav is no exception. She digs her nails so deep into Astarion's skin she makes him bleed

Receiving handjobs from her is an absolutely new type of pleasure

She also has fangs, and she can bite like a vampire

By the end of the day, the bed looks like a battlefield, and they both have bitemarks all over their bodies

"WTF happened to you two? Were you fighting?" "We were fucking. And it's not your business."

When Tav is scared or stressed, she wraps her tail around Astarion's leg

When Tav is aroused, her tail starts waggling uncontrollably, and Astarion teases her to the verge of tears

"Yes! Yes, I want you right now! And right here!" "Say please, little demon." "Oh, ffs! Please fuck me!"

Another sensitive spot? The base of the horns

After sex, when Tav falls asleep on her belly, Astarion likes studying her back - these tieflings have the weirdest marks

And wondering what if she had real wings

When Tav is angry, she can sit on her tail like a cat. That's her way of saying, "Don't touch me; I am brooding."

But it usually doesn't last long

Especially if Astarion starts stroking her horns

Then she is a melted goo again

#astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 astarion #bg3 #astarion bg3 #astarion romance #astarion headcanon #astarion headcanons #astarion x female tav #astarion x female reader #astarion x tiefling #tieflings #astarion smut #astarion smut headcanons #astarion x f!tav #spacebarbarian headcanon

[yoditopascal]

Dick Grayson x Reader. Something like they’ve been together for a while and share an apartment. Reader was supposed to be out with friends and didn’t tell Dick so he just casually swings into the apartment via the window and reader just kinda goes WTF cuz reader doesn’t know.

No cuz I absolutely LOVED writing this 😭

You were just settling into bed for the night, fresh out of the shower, you were nice and snug in your bed with your favorite book and the tv on low.

You were supposed to be out with your friends for the night but the promise of a good book and a night in to just relax after a stressful week of school and work was just too good to pass up, so you shot them a text to tell them you couldn’t make it and opted to stay in.

There was no telling where your boyfriend Dick was, he often kept odd hours and would disappear from time to time but that was just Dick. He liked to go with the flow and swing his own way, you didn’t mind at all as long as he always swung back to you.

Just as you were about to flip the page, a loud crash from the living room made you jump damn near out of your skin. You were home alone with no pets and you knew your boyfriend probably wouldn’t be home anytime soon. Getting to your feet, you grabbed a bat, it was right by your bed, something Dick had insisted on you keeping close by living here in Blüdhaven, and crept to the living room, your heart in your throat, racing.

“Shit.” A familiar voice swore, a figure had emerged from the window. They had knocked over a flowerpot you had set there so it could get some sunlight.

Bending down to pick in up a whooshing sound flew threw the air as you swung the bat, the figure catching it in their hands just inches away from their shadow-covered face.

“Holy shit!” The voice shouted, shoving the bat away.

“Get out!” You screamed back ready to swing again, the figure held up his hands stepping closer you you into the light of the moon

“W-wait babe it’s me!” Cried Dick as he snatched off his domino mask revealing his smooth features, thick black hair falling into his face.

“What the hell?!” You shouted back incredulously lowering the bat in your hands but not completely letting go.

“It’s me! Dick!” He said trying to approach you, you stepped back uneasily, this had to be some kind of prank.

“Dick what the fuck?!”

“Why are you swinging a bat at me?!” He cried pointing at the bat still in your hands

“Why are you coming in through the window?!” You asked, pointing at him with said bat gesturing to his outfit. He wore a skin tight back catsuit with a blue bird across his chest and shoulders. ”And why are you dressed like Nightwing?!!”

“I am Nightwing!” He said pointing at himself

“No you’re not!” You said shaking your head, this was definitely a prank.

“I am! I swear!” He cried again, not willing to get swung at again with the bat.

“What the fuck?!” You said dropping the bat and dropping, you walked over to the couch that was in the living room and dropped down on it just staring at Dick in disbelief before you put your head in your hands.

This would explain why he ‘worked’ all those late hours all the time and seemed to just disappear out of thin air, but Nightwing? Really?! You wouldn’t have guessed it was him at all!

“Babe please talk to me…” Dick said as he crept over. He slowly sat down next to you placing a gentle hand on your shoulder that he stroked with his gloved thumb

“Oh I’m gonna talk to you alright,” you said turning to look at him a fierce look in your eye that made him shiver, it was both hot and scary at the same time he thought

“We’re about to have a whole ass conversation about this!”

#answered asks #yodito speaks #dick grayson x reader #nightwing x reader #dc comics #dick grayson #nightwing #dick grayson imagine #nightwing imagine

[feast-upon-my-words]

"You are legally obligated to keep holding me"

Wriothesley x gn!reader

Written as part of @cy-inky 's 1WEEKCHL

Cw: none

"Wrio I have to go..." You sighed at the way your husband clung to your torso like a vice.

"No..." He smushed his face into your side, muffling his voice as he mumbled for you to stay. He sounded like a toddler, whining and clinging desperately to your waist. He looked adorable though, and your heart melted when he lifted his head to look up at you with those puppy eyes; the effect only catalysed by his ridiculously cute bedhead. It was actually quite impressive how messed up his hair was, sticking up at every angle and partly covering his eyes. But it was those eyes that really sealed the deal, such a soft and sleepy gaze that it was enough to set your heart alight ten times over. It was definitely safe to say wriothesley had perfected the 'wet dog' look.

Fuck he was adorable.

You knew exactly what he was doing, and so did he. "Wrio I really can't be late..." You say, stroking his head gently before attempting to release yourself again.

That was when he took his chance to finally pounce on you. With his strong arms he lifted you up and rolled you over so that he was spooning you like a giant Teddy bear. "Wrio!" You yelped. He nuzzled his neck into your shoulder, his arms wrapping firmer around your waist, pulling you into him. "No... I am the Duke of meroptide and that means you are legally obligated to keep holding me." He really was a toddler.

You sighed, finally giving in to him. Not that you had a choice, he'd only had you back in his arms for a moment and you could already hear the steady noise of his snores behind you. It was no use trying to escape anyway, even when he was asleep his grip was impossibly tight, though just loose enough not to be constricting. If you were honest, at that moment it felt more like the real unescapable prison was wriothesley's embrace.

______________________________________

My first actual fic on tumblr

heheheehheh Hope yall enjoyed (I mean if you didn't wtf are you doing reading this far? /j)

ALSO MY ASKS ARE OPEN, PLZ GIVE ME REQS

#wriothesley x reader #wriothesley #1WEEKCHL #genshin impact #genshin x reader #word-feasts

[whyse7vn]

BOOK CLUB -

[ ot7 x reader ]

MILLIONAIRE CLUB + tae

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

tae: my girl tell me to shut up and i do

hobi: do you have schizophrenia

jk: ong

my girl tell me to shut up i kill myself

yoongi: it’s 6 in the morning

tae: so…

i’ve been seeing someone…

jimin: as in dating??

namjoon: therapy?

hobi: hallucinations?????

y/n: gm 😚

jk: omg my girl online what do i do >.<

jin: send nudes

jk: u first

jin: ?

jk: ??

jin: send it to HER

jk: ohhhhh

yoongi: ur girl?

namjoon: our book is out btw

tae: we wrote a book?

jk: did my story about the aggressive zebra in my room make it in

jimin: what

tae: i don’t remember writing a book

namjoon: no

jk: wtf :/

hobi: he needs to leave those drugs ALONE i’m telling you

jin: awoman

tae: did you write it without me??

y/n: if exo and superjunior are at our doors with ak47’s and bombs in the next 48 hours don’t act surprised

jimin: i could take them all tbh 🥱

jk: in bed?

jimin: stop talking to me

tae: do i still get paid for the book?

namjoon: ur overreacting

jimin: ????

DID YOU NOT SEE WHAT THAT NASTY MANCHILD SAID??????

namjoon: not you

y/n: I AM NOT

they’re gonna come get us i’m not joking

hobi: what if they bring all of nct with them

yk for back up

y/n: the end of bts for realzies

yoongi: dramatic

jk: let’s bomb the sm building

tae: is it like a colouring book?

namjoon: tae stop talking

tae: ur not my girl i don’t answer to you

hobi: where do we get a bomb?

jimin: bet namjoon knows

namjoon: ??

why would i know

jin: but i like shinee

y/n: REAL

we have to think about this

yoongi: still 6 in the morning btw

jimin: okay big ben like???

jin: yoongi can you not be a hater rn

yoongi: get a job

jin: i just wrote a book actually

namjoon: technically

jin: shut the FUCK up

tae: SO YOU DID DO IT WITHOUT ME

hobi: what if we bombed it while shinee wasn’t there

jk: what about nct??

i think they’re cool

jimin: idc what you think tbh

y/n: i agree

jimin: great minds think alike

y/n: make sure shinee and nct are out

ALL of nct

jimin: nvm

jin: isn’t there like 400 of them

lowkey impossible

namjoon: 400 is a major exaggeration

there like 20 of them??

something like that

y/n: gotta make sure marks safe >.<

yoongi: ?

jk: what

tae: is the book only in korean?

jin: someone put a muzzle on him omg

hobi: isn’t he into that?

jin: ur right the only option is to kill myself

jimin: this bomb plan is getting long i’m out

hobi: yikes

same

y/n: hobi :C

hobi: sorry :c

jk: i’m also out i have a new mission

jimin: to shower??

sorry couldn’t help myself

i’m actually not sorry

i could help myself

i like to lie sometimes

jin: kim seokjin is also out

y/n: fine me it’s gonna be me yoongi and joon to save us all then

namjoon: i never said i was in?

y/n: you never said you were out?

namjoon: out

yoongi: i’m not involved

y/n: FINE

you all SUCK

poor lonely y/n will save the day then

assholes

we have to get them first

like are you guys suicidal??

hobi: a bit

y/n: i’m just gonna save myself then

hobi: saving you saving me

i really love nct

y/n: hope they get you first

hobi: i’ll literally become an nct member

i’ll be in wayV

jk: ur not chinese

unless…

jin: wayV isnt nct that’s two different groups??

namjoon: isn’t the group just called nct 127?

jin: like they are all under 127?

yoongi: so what’s nct dream then?

jimin: isn’t there an nct u??

jk: me?

jin: so the people that sung the perfume song are 127 not wayv???

y/n: no dojaejung are a separate unit

but they are also in nct 127

namjoon: what

yoongi: superm is also 127?

jimin: i’m having a stroke

this is so jin core

jin: excuse me??

jimin: ??

hobi: fake fans

you would never understand this nct life i live

namjoon: ur right

yoongi: what is going on

jk: have fun with nct i’ll miss you

jin: i’m back on the plan of bombing sm cuz wtf was that

unnecessary as HELL

down with sm

and all their fucking units

tae: can i get my money from the book now or…

yoongi: why are you still talking about the book

jimin: the broke era is really getting bad

y/n: begging for money is insane

tae: i’m NOT begging

y/n: so what are you doing?

tae: humbly asking for my cut?

i’m a businessman

i’m a millionaire for a reason

namjoon: act like it

tae: um?

rude but i’ll let it slide

pay up

now

someone

anyone

preferably now would be nice

JIMIN DID YOU JUST REQUEST 4K FROM ME WHAT THE HELL??

jimin: don’t have it millionaire?

tae: ofc i do!!!!!

but why in my right mind would i give YOU out off all people any of MY money

y/n: if you are in ur right mind i must be fucking insane oh my god

jin: about to cut some watermelon

hobi: yummy

jk: what if nct are all robots made by russia to spy on all of us

tae: what

jk: i’ll kill mark first

to test the theory

tae: ur not talking about my money and it’s making me itch stfu pls

yoongi: itch?

hobi: are you a crack addict?

jimin: namjoon would know a lot about that

namjoon: no i wouldn’t

stop saying that

jin: this watermelon just squirted on me

feeling violated

y/n: wtf?

hobi: i don’t think that’s normal

jimin: how tf a watermelon squirt

jk: pics

yoongi: what is wrong with you

namjoon: let’s do a phone detox

let’s all turn our phones off

for a month

tae: IM ITCHINGGGGG

jimin: namjoon 1 hour off the drugs

hobi: highkey gross get some cream or something??

jin: right i’m trying to eat here

namjoon: i don’t do drugs

jin: what if i sent a watermelon with a bomb in it to sm

namjoon: leave sm alone

jin: never

i’ll send a bomb for every unit they confused the poor world with

jk: 82

jimin: something about that number seems wrong

jk: 127

yoongi: didn’t laugh

y/n: think you did

tae: itched so hard i’m bleeding

hobi: we’re gonna let them kill tae before the bombs are sent right?

tae: ??

jin: that’s stupid

tae: right like 😭😭

jin: ofc lmao

tae: what

y/n: now we have a book out can we start a book club

namjoon: that would be cute

yoongi: idk if tae knows how to read like that

jk: i love boobs

*books

i SWEAR I MEANT TO SAY BOOKS

PLS BELIEVE ME

jimin: i don’t believe you

jk: PLS

tae: i love the sound of “book club”

hobi: ???

y/n: “book club”??

tae: what?

jin: he’s gonna say something dumb

tae: book club is code for sex?

jin: told you

y/n: what

hobi: bro

jk: it is?

yoongi: no

tae: guys i think ur getting old

all the kids know that

jk: i would like to try book club

did i say it right?

like the kids would

tae: no it’s gotta be more like

wanna join my book club 😉

jk: wanna join my book club 😉

tae: perfect

jk: i don’t have a book club tho

tae: that doesn’t matter

jk: i don’t like lying

i don’t think i can do this

yoongi: same

yoongi left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

tae: he’s mad he’s old

doesn’t know the slang of todays children

jin left left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

tae: lame

@y/n wanna join my book club 😉

y/n left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

jk: DON’T TALK TO HER LIKE THAT YOU NASTY LITTLE LIAR

jk left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

tae: lol wtf he mad as hell

hobi left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

jimin left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

namjoon: i really hope the person that you’re seeing is actually a therapist

namjoon left “MILLIONAIRES CLUB + tae”

#bts crack #bts fanfic #bts fic #bts fluff #bts text #bts x reader #bts imagines #bts x y/n #bts x you #namjoon x reader #jin x reader #suga x reader #jhope x reader #jimin x reader #v x reader #jungkook x reader #hobi x reader #taehyung x reader #bts fake chats #bts incorrect texts #ot7 x reader

[sareenademon]

Bi Han and The Dog He Said He Never Wanted

Sareena: Beloved! Look at what I found! He was all alone at the market.Isn’t he adorable?!

*Sareena shows him a Maltese puppy. The puppy starts yapping excitedly and Bi Han looks disgusted.*

Bi Han: Take it back Sareena.

Sareena: Bi Han! Don’t be mean!

Bi Han: We are not keeping that little beast.

They did end up keeping him much to Bi Han’s dismay. He was not an animal lover and he told Sareena that the puppy was entirely her responsibility. He would not care for it.

Sareena tried to name the puppy Snowball. Bi Han couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

Bi Han: We’re not calling him that.

Sareena: Why not? It’s cute.

Bi Han: No.

Sareena: What about Fluffy?

Bi Han: Are you serious? Absolutely fucking not.

Sareena: Then what ideas do you have?

Bi Han: How about, Runt?

Sareena: *slaps his arm* …What about…Fang? After my demon fang swords.

Bi Han: Fang…Fine, whatever.

For a couple of nights the puppy irritated him to no end. It wouldn’t stop yapping. Day and night. It was so god damn needy too. It shit everywhere. Bi Han also became jealous of the little beast because it took up most of Sareena’s attention.

One night, he had enough. He was already sleep deprived, and now this puppy was barking at 3 am in the morning. He grabbed the puppy out of his crate and screamed at him to shut up. When little Fang started whining from fear Bi Han immediately felt like shit.

Wtf was he doing? Screaming at little animals. He quickly tried to quiet Fang so that Sareena wouldn’t wake up and bitch him out for upsetting him. He instinctively cradled the fluffy puppy in his arms, trying to get him to stop trembling. He gently stroked Fang’s head.

Fang was so tiny, so fragile. As Bi Han looked into the puppy’s big eyes, he felt his cold heart begin to melt.

Bi Han: Shhh…Don’t fear little Fang…I won’t harm you…

When Fang licked his fingers, that was it. That was his baby. That was his son. His precious Fang, Fang.

Sareena found him the next morning passed out on the couch with Fang sleeping on his chest.

The first thing Bi Han did the next day was buy him a expensive new blue collar, he had the Lin Kuei symbol put on it.

Sareena: I thought you didn’t like him.

Bi Han: If we’re going to keep this little beast then he must be properly trained.

Sareena: And the fancy collar?…

Bi Han: Don’t question my decisions, woman!

Bi Han is a pretty intense guy by nature and that transfers into his dog parenting.

Bi Han took it upon himself to train Fang. He put him on a strict food and training schedule. He also researched all about puppies and how to train them.

Also put Fang on a cook food diet.

Sareena: Why can’t we just feed him dog food?

Bi Han: You want to feed him that dehydrated crap?! I thought you cared about this dog!

He teaches Fang how to sit, roll over, fetch, shake, and play dead. He’s such a proud father.

Fang becomes like his emotional support dog. Whenever he has a hard day or he’s just pissed off, he calls over his puppy for comfort.

When he’s stuck doing paperwork, he likes to have Fang on his lap to keep him company.

He gets him groomed regularly and cleans his eyes daily. No crusty eyes for his puppy.

It gets really cold in Artika so Bi Han makes sure to bundle Fang up. Fang has a collection of little jackets and sweaters. He also has booties. Sareena finds it a bit silly and can’t help but laugh whenever she sees Bi Han putting booties on Fang.

Bi Han: Don’t laugh at him, it’s to protect his paws from the snow!

He doesn’t take Fang to the dog park anymore because he thinks the other dogs play too rough with him.

He started shouting at the other dog owner and Sareena has had to drag him out of there before he started throwing hands.

Aggressively overprotective over Fang. Once Tomas accidentally stepped on his paw and Bi Han was on poor Tomas like white on rice.

#sareena #bi han #sub zero #bireena #mortal komat 1 #tomas vrbada #kuai liang

[sgntr]

Adventure 2 - OL MILF

During one of my internships in university, I always noticed this OL who dress like a slut in office. She was small in size but her tits were huge. She regularly wears a tight top with her boobs bulging out. When she runs for her meeting, it would be bouncing all over the place. And she was always running past me for meetings.

Naturally, I was looking every time she walks pass. Her magnificent tits bouncing around. Imagining how I could use my hands to cup it up and squeeze them.

One Friday, we had an office event that allowed for interns to network with other people in the company. Luckily for me, the Milf was sitting next to me. I could not help but kept giving her tits the occasional glance.

We had a few drinks together and chatted a little with everyone at the table. But she did not seem very interested in being there as she was always on her phone. However, she kept moving across me to get the beer and her tits would occasionally brush against my arm getting me aroused.

After she got a little tipsy, she started to be more open and talked more. She was constantly slapping my arm and laughing out loud at things we were talking about.

As she was reaching over for another drink, her elbow accidentally hit my cup of red wine and spilled it all over my crotch. She was super apologetic and quickly get tissue papers to dry it up. Knowing my dick was hard and not wanting her to know, I quickly turned away and told her I will handle it.

I walked off to the bathroom where she insisted to follow and help me. She then pulled me into our office handicap toilet and tried to help me clean up.

"Nothing to be ashamed about. We are all adults here. Now let me help you so I won't feel as bad!"

I gave up trying to reject her.

"We need to quickly wash it. If not your pants is ruined. Take it off and I will do it for you"

I was stunned and gave her the wtf face. She reiterated that we are all adults and asked me to just do it. But I could tell that she was already a little drunk and not really in control of herself. I "reluctantly" obliged and took off my pants for her to wash.

"Okay the stain is coming off. Now just need to wait for it to dry under the hand dryer."

I told her i can just dry it with the hand dryer myself and she can go back and enjoy but she insisted on staying on.

At this point my dick was rock hard as the water splashes from washing my pants made her top slightly translucent. I could see her cleavage the whole time as we were just sitting there awkwardly with occasional ice breaker conversations.

"So how long have you worked here?" I asked

"About 4 years? I lost count hahah. I am probably not thinking straight right now. But wanna fuck? hehehe"

I was stunned.

"I noticed you looking at my boobs the whole night. And I can see your dick throbbing the whole time" She continued.

"Errr"

"No one will know." She gave me that envious smile and walked over. "I probably won't even remember all this" she whispered in my ear as she put her hands down my underwear and pulled out my dick. She started stroking.

I instinctively did what I always dreamt of doing and used my hands to squeeze her tits. I am glad that those were not just paddings but actual real boobs. She started moaning in sync with my sqeezes.

"Oh yes daddy. I love feeling a real mans squeeze. My husband never used me like that before"

"Oh has your husband used you like that?"

Before she could even reply, I pushed her to the floor and forced my dick into her mouth thrusting it in and out of her mouth giving her a good face fuck.

"Fuckkkkk, never had such a good blowjob before. Can't wait to be in your pussy"

My dick got sloppy real quick. And when I gave her time to breathe, she said "Use my like your personal fuck toy daddy." And that was all the motivation I need.

I turned her around and bent her over only to notice her panties were already off and her pussy was dripping wet. Turns out she was already touching herself while I was face fucking her.

I aimed my dick at her pussy and thrusted it in. I did not expect it to be so tight and warm inside. The milf moaned out loud in pleasure. "My husbands dick could not stretch me out like that."

I continued fucking her hard using her boobs as handles to hold her up. This went on for a while till I noticed that the people outside might hear us. So I stuffed her panties into her mouth to gag her and continued fucking her.

I sat on the toilet bowl and she started riding my dick facing me. She was like a machine. Her pussy moving up and down and a constant frequency. I would give her the occasional spank and she would jolt. She went on to pull off her top and revealed her glorious tits.

I immediately took my chance and slapped them followed by a good squeeze. Grabbing on to them, I used it to control the pace of her riding.

"Im gonna cum. fkk i want to cum all over your tits"

She took out the panties from her mouth and went "Yes daddy!"

The milf got on her knees, put my dick between her tits. She then spat on it before stroking my dick with her tits. It was my first time ever getting a tit job and it felt amazing. Before long, my cum shot out and onto her face.

Seeing my thick white cum on her face kept me hard and it was something I can never unsee. Now every time I see her walking pass, I would see the image of her face covered in my cum.

We cleaned up and just nice my pants were dry already. We got dressed and it was already quite late. Just nice her husband was already at the lobby waiting for her. I sent her down to the lobby as she seemed a little tipsy and could not walk properly. As I handed her over to her husband, he still said "Wow you are such a nice colleague. Thank you for taking care of her!" hahaha I sure took care of her :)

Some pics of her body that she posted online :)

Do drop me a follow and lmk if y’all would like to hear more stories :)

#sgntr #sgntr sarah

[ohbo-ohno]

I'm sorry if it was asked before but take your original Ghoap idea and...reversing it a bit? It's Ghost who notices you first and he doesn't have enough willpower or common courtesy to be nice, so he just fucking snatches us from the street right into the apartment. And we're scared and afraid and panicking but he just overpowers us!! He spent a good few days breaking us in, like a really disobedient kitten who keeps munching on the furniture and hiding in various places, but we eventually got tired( And we're almost used to him in those few days, he is basically normal. Yes, it's the whole non-con thing and he keeps us in the bed, like a teddy bear, but he is predictable. Then his partner comes home and we're like ??? wtf??? you have a husband? And Soap is just SO excited to see the new addition! He is terrifying because he is unpredictable and energetic and we almost miss the time it was just Ghost and us. ghost is the bad guy here, obviously, but he is a known evil. Soap is an enigma and it scares far more

AH!!!

i think it would be so much SCARIER to be kidnapped by ghost and meet soap later. like, soap is deranged but at least he tries to be comforting yk? even if (in this fic at least) he's literally deranged and the one keeping you captive, he's trying to help you calm down by saying nice things and all that

i think simon would just like. wait you out. he'll stroke your arms/back/thighs, try and relax with you, but he's not saying anything to help you calm down. figures it's better to show he won't hurt you, doesn't see the point of reminding you after he says it the first time, it's better for you to figure it out on your own

"like a really disobedient kitten who keeps munching on the furniture and hiding in various places" is making me go !!!!!! i am sitting up straight and at attention.

hiding underneath the bed when simon goes to the bathroom or steps out of the room for a minute :( watching him walk around the room, shaking where you're huddled from fear. listening to him sigh and seeing him drop to his knees, and he just looks at you all unimpressed. really? and you refuse to come out. makes him roll his eyes and reach under the bed, grabs you by your ankle and drags you out. gives you a few sharp slaps on the ass to calm you down when you scratch at him

destroying things to act out :( simon just standing all stoically as you smash his plates and glasses on the ground, crosses his arms over his chest and grunts you done? when you look to him for a reaction. takes you over his lap and turns your ass red as punishment, ignores the way you kick and scream for your punishment. makes you put on shoes and sweep up your mess under his supervision.

ghost introduces you to soap like someone introduces a puppy to a kitten. has you meet in your territory (the bedroom, where you've spent the most time), keeps a hand on the back of johnny's neck to keep him from getting overexcited with you.

leaves you two alone eventually, tells you be good, and johnny mauls you damn near the second the front door is closed. fucks you all day, doesn't notice your bruised knees and tear stained face

#gremlingottoosilly #asks and answers #ghoap x reader #dlmliyh #kinda #an au of an au lol

[phantommaws]

🔞 Chapter Preview - Insurrection

!!WIP LeviHan Smut!!

AKA idk wtf I am doing because I’ve never written anything like this before.

NO MINORS

It is what it said on the tin, my first EVER piece of smut. Never written anything this descriptive before, but without further ado, I present whatever this is. Constructive criticism and feedback is incredibly appreciated.

Hange looked up as Levi walked into the room, wearing nothing but his sleeping shorts as he carried two cups over to the bed. She carefully placed the book down on the bedside table before taking the cup offered to her, catching the soothing smells of chamomile and valerian root as she gave a sigh of contentment.

“Is it really a good idea to be reading, Four-Eyes? You yourself complained about how bad that headache had felt earlier.” Levi said as he slipped under the sheets beside them as they looked at him over the rims of their glasses.

“You know me, shorty. I like to read before I go to sleep – helps settle my mind.” Hange took a sip of the tea, their eye closing in bliss at the soothing flavours. She loved the new routine that she had devised for herself, revelling in the fact that she no longer had to stay awake all night the way she had in the past.

“Although, we do have the house to ourselves tonight – Onyankopon is out visiting family. I think you know what that means…”

Levi’s eyes widened in shock as he almost choked on his mouthful of tea. His heart pounded in his chest as he turned to face Hange, seeing the look of pure lust in her deep brown eye as they looked at him over the rims of their glasses. He felt his cheeks flushing, mind running wild as he imagined all of the different things that would possibly happen.

“Quit looking at me like that, Four-Eyes.” He said quietly, trying to ignore the sly smirk that Hange was throwing his way. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t ignore their presence beside him, nor the growing heat and tightness between his legs.

“Like what?”

“Like a wild animal stalking its prey.”

Hange chuckled at his statement, and Levi felt his heart leap. Fuck, he thought as he grasped Hange by the waist, pulling them so that they were sat straddling his hips as she squealed in shock, it’s been far too long since the last time.

“Damn, shorty,” Hange teased in a sultry tone as their hands wandered down his torso and ever closer to the hem of his shorts, “I didn’t realise that you would be so eager…”

Levi merely grunted in response, pulling his lover close and planting a kiss on their throat, and all Hange could do was bite back a breathy moan at the gentle touch. His tender kisses felt like they left trails of fire on her skin as he moved to her collarbones.

“Oh…Levi…”

Hange’s eye closed in bliss, breath hitching in their throat as she felt the palms of his hands wandering across her back under the oversized shirt that she was wearing. Levi always had such incredible ways of making them feel so beautiful and sensual, and now was no different.

“You’re so beautiful, Hange,” Levi breathed as he worked the shirt off, revealing the curves of Hange’s body as she sat above him and chuckled; he shivered in anticipation, and Hange smiled warmly as they reached back and released their hair from the ponytail – strands of their rich brown locks cascaded down, covering their shoulders slightly as they stretched their body out with a smile. Levi didn’t know if it was possible, but it felt like his face was growing even redder as he took in the sight before him - their soft, supple skin; the slight, elegant curve of their back.

Levi reached up and began to gently stroke the skin of Hange’s stomach, and they practically melted under the gentle attention. Both his hands and his eye wandered further down, reaching between her legs as she leaned in for a gentle kiss. Hange’s breath hissed in as they felt his fingers toying with them through the shorts, fighting the urge to grind themselves against his hand.

“Take the shorts off.” Levi practically growled into Hange’s ear with a smirk as he pulled his hand away, making them groan in annoyance at the sudden disappearance of stimulation. The brunette eagerly wriggled out of the garment, tossing it to the side before leaning back down again, crushing their lips to Levi’s in a passionate embrace. Once again, Levi’s fingers began to trace teasing circles around their clit, and Hange could barely contain their moans.

“Oh…Levi! That feels so good!”

Hange’s eye remained closed, and before she could register anything else other than the intense sensations, they felt Levi push them down so that their back was pressed against the softness of the sheets. She moved to look up, but the sudden presence of a tongue against her most sensitive spot accompanied by Levi’s fingers rubbing against her entrance swiftly stole away whatever words she was trying to form in that moment, replaced only by a cry of pure pleasure.

“Hnnngh…fuck…Fuck! Aaah…aaaaaahh…”

Hange’s face was flushed, feeling the warmth building in their lower abdomen as she grabbed fistfuls of Levi’s jet-black hair, her cries and desperate whimpers growing in pitch and volume. He was eagerly lapping at them with the flat of his tongue, fingers threatening to make her come undone at the very seams.

“Levi…I…”

Levi couldn’t help but smirk slightly as he continued his work on his lover. Their gasps and desperate cries were music to his ears, and from how much her body was clamping down on his fingers, he knew she was close. Hange was covered in a thin sheen of sweat, and their entire body was trembling as his attentions brought them ever closer to climax as her back arched off the bed.

“Fuck! Levi, I’m…I’m gonna…!”

The fire pooling up in their lower abdomen exploded into an inferno, and Hange could no longer hold back her screams as the pure, unbridled pleasure overwhelmed her entire being. It felt like there was electricity coursing through her entire body as Levi continued his motions, helping her ride out the waves until she was left gulping for breath, collapsing against the sheets.

That’s all I have for now as I’m still working on it. Will be uploading the whole thing once it’s finished.

#hanji zoe #aot #attack on titan #hange zoe #hange zöe #levi ackerman #levihan #hangezoe #levihan brainrot #levihan smut #aot smut #levihan fanfiction #aot fanfiction

[safetycar-restart]

we all know pierre has a fondness of a certain position (wink wink 🐶). but i only see people write about pierre being the one fucking (which don’t get me wrong him fucking bunny brainless with bunny not being able to support his own head and shoulders anymore is so insanely brain numbingly hot). but what about him wanting to try it. or, him being so cocky about his skills in fucking you decide thats a bit much.

like he’s just finished fucking bunny into the mattress. charles is literally just melted on the bed, his own cum smeared on his abs from where he collapsed stomach first into his mess and he has no way of moving because his limbs are jelly. don’t get me wrong pierre is good at fucking bunny in this position, like insanely good. but he was being way too cocky whilst fucking charles, smirking the whole time. just before he came inside charles, still smirking fyi, you tell him straight up not to come. the smirk on his face stops instantly and charles whines and whines wanting pierre’s cum to fill him. you stroke charles’s hair and shoulders and shush him and give him kisses, whilst giving pierre a slight glare. and poor pierre is just like ‘wtf i gave her precious baby boy like two orgasms just from my amazing skills and she won’t let me come r u joking?’

so after charles get’s his aftercare and he’s just still a singular braincell and so happy and warm, he’s in pierre’s joggers that fall off his little waist and one of the purposefully oversized jumpers of yours that fits him just big enough to look baggy, and he’s happily snuggled into the couch with fluffy blankets and water next to him and he’s set up to watch cars 2, yet we all know he’s just trying to stay awake for you but he’ll be asleep within a minute. one little kiss on his forehead before walking back to the bedroom where pierre is still nude and so so hard. like he’s kind of annoyed he wasn’t allowed to cum. and its so quick how it comes on.

strap, on. pierre, hands-and-knees, his tight little ass, opened up and drenched with lube. and he’s so confused but also slightly happy that he’s getting fucked. ‘you were a bit too cocky there, acting like a little slut who could fuck better than anyone.’ ‘never had this before have you? excited to see what bunny loves?’ ‘be good for me and take me and he’ll curl up to you whilst i take care of you’

and he’s a mess when you push in. the dildo stretches him perfectly, and hits his prostate instantly. and its a quick ride from there. hes gripping the sheets desperately and his brain is entirely just focused on being good for once. and one slap to his pretty ass and he’s done. cumming and collapsing the same way charles did. ‘i can do it as well as you, do not get too cocky’

and then u clean him, make sure he’s okay and u guys go into the living room and surprise surprise charles is asleep. u cuddle up with him and a small smile comes on his face when he can smell u too. and u watch pierre start to dose off and just as he reaches the brink of sleep ‘you did so well baby, fucked our bunny well and then took me perfectly’

and then theres two asleep with smiles on there faces. its only 10:30.

my god i ramble a lot. but i couldnt sleep thinking abt this.

- 🍁

I... oh my god?? 🍁 anon you are becoming too powerful because I read this and then just stared at the wall for a while because this is so fucking good. I'm gonna try to add more thoughts but this is fucking perfect as it is already so I doubt I can make it any better.

Firstly, I am fully obsessed with how fucking pierre is almost a punishment for being too cocky when fucking Charles? Cause yes, of course pierre fucks bunny well and you're very happy with that, but pierre is your sub too.

Sometimes you want him to be knocked down a few pegs and remember that he is your sub as much as he is Charles's Dom, and that he only gets to fuck bunny like that because you left him.

You decide to do this because you know that pierre absolutely loves when you take control and remind him of his place.

The moment you tell pierre not to cum, he pulls out. Of course he's upset because he wants to cum and poor bunny is not at all happy about not getting Pierre's cum, but neither of them complain or even think about disobeying? Because they're both your good boys. They always listen to you.

You leave pierre there while you clean Charles and get him situated on the couch. You know that Pierre loves when you make him wait, so you can focus on Charles.

I adore the idea of Charles choosing Cars 2? I think he has a wide selection of animated movies to watch and he only watches them for aftercare and loves them so much. Sometimes he'll make you and pierre watch with him? He tends to fall asleep within the first ten minutes, but you and Pierre always watch the whole movie through because that's what Charles wanted and wake him up with kisses when the credits start rolling.

You double check with charles that he's okay with being on his own for a little while, and he really is? He's so comfy and safe and well taken care of and he knows you're going to go into the bedroom to treat Pierre how Pierre loves to be treated. He's more than happy to cuddle on the couch with his soft clothes and blankie and water and Cars 2.

When you get back to the bedroom, the smirk has been wiped off of Pierre's face because he knows he's going to get punished a little for being too cocky.

You make quick work of stretching and positioning pierre, because you know that he's already very desperate and wants it rough. He relaxes so well against your hand, opening up perfectly for you and shaking as you finally get him stretched enough.

You choose his favourite dildo, the one you like to make him bounce on in the corner while you treat Charles softly and attach it to your strap on.

Pierre thinks he's going to ride you or be fucked in missionary, but then you grab him and push his head down onto the bed, making him get into doggy style and pierre is instantly obsessed.

He only realises you're fucking him the same way he fucked bunny earlier when you say, "You're not the only who can fuck like this, remember that". And then... fuck he's absolutely gone.

He always knew it would feel good, but it feels even better than he thought possible. You keep a bruising pace, fucking pierre hard and fast until he can't remember his own name, until he's moaning and whimpering so much that Charles can probably hear him from the living room.

The pain from spanking his ass makes him lose it. He was so close to cumming when you made him stop fucking Charles, and then you stretched him and fucked him so hard so of course the pain from the singular spank was the tipping point.

He completely collapses, in exactly the same way Charles did. In fact, he actually collapses into bunny's puddle of cum? Which Pierre realises and then very nearly gets hard again.

Of course he gets his aftercare with Charles.

Bunny is so happy when pierre comes shuffling into the living room, immediately opening his arms for pierre to come cuddle and to hear about what happened.

Also, it should be noted that bunny insists on seeing you do it next time? The idea of you fucking pierre doggy style makes his single braincell implode because it's simply too good.

He simply must see it for himself.

#poly!piarles #sub!charles #sub!pierre #pg #cl #nsfw. #f!reader #poly!dom/sub/sub #🍁

[piratefishmama]

personal below cut

lmao i am highkey stressed.

everything has happened all at once over the past couple of days.

two days ago: my dad suffered several mini strokes because someone he was doing work for refused to be patient, continued to play the pain olympics, and kept making threats despite him being obviously very ill to the point of being blind and on a walking stick (yes, i still think he's the most annoying person in the world, but y'know... that lady is going to hell)

the day after, my dog decides to be the biggest idiot known to man, and get into a fight with the other dog. who is bigger and older than her.

she now has two holes in her leg. superficial, but hey, holes. not good. i dont think he meant to bite her hence it being shallow and not at all worrying to the vets.

then, to make matters worse, because i had to work, i had to leave her in the kitchen separate from him because y'know. holes.

this actual idiot somehow in her attempt to get out of the kitchen while i was at work, ripped her whole goddamn dew claw off. like it is completely gone.

two vet trips in two days ladies and gents!!

i am poor and stressed.

not to mention, because of the strokes my dad has suffered, the hospital are saying they'll need to do a home visit before they can release him, to make sure the house is safe for him. it's not. it's absolutely not. it's not even remotely fit to house someone in need of that kind of support and i'm not even remotely suitable to PROVIDE the support he needs. First of all: it's a HOUSE. it has two storeys, it has stairs and not enough room on those stairs to install a stairlift.

second: yeah i cant provide that care, i have a job.

so if they try and put him into somewhere else: i wont be able to afford this house. and i cant afford any other house either. or any other flat, or a studio appartment, i was looking last night

how the fuck can you charge someone £800 per month for a SINGLE room and actually sleep at night, like what kind of person do you have to be to charge that much for so little?

An i wouldnt be able to take the dogs with me. idk wtf im gonna do! guess i might wind up homeless.

awesome.

#personal #high key stressed lmao

[luci-z-wont-shut-up]

Episode 2

Bro snow in the desert is not actually that wierd

Bro. Bro u srsly need to rethink ur tourism program like what the fuck. FREE RADON FOR EVERYONE

I'm sorry but as soon as he said "it changes colors" I immediately envisioned a fuckin. Caramelldansen cloud XD

OH SO IT KILLS PPL. O K A Y .

Bro if literally Existing in Nightvale is so dangerous, how does the population stay afloat. At all.

Sounds like just a normal day in the post office tbh. Also Racist Magic Guy is starting to grow on me. His oblivious stupidity and self-sure incompetence have captivated me.

Honestly a floating cat in the men's bathroom sounds like the least abnormal thing so far. Cats are just Like That™️.

"This message was brought to you by Coca-Cola" yeah that tracks X'D

"Because all of us are normal" bombastic side eye. Criminal offensive side eye

Ah so the secret Boy Scout cult has finally achieved immorality. Good to know. Just another Tuesday ig. Also d a r k s c o u t XD

WAIT "Sign-up is automatic and random" um wat. Hi what. Does. Does this perchance have anything to do with the Ominous Helicopters

This man has *clearly* never been a father. Or had siblings. Or cousins. Ever. Maybe *don't* bring children near the Caramelldansen Cloud of Carrion?

...oh so they just have straight up dragons. Ok. Dragons who commit insurance fraud? *throws hands up* why not

"McDaniels was pulled over for speeding last night" UM SIR how big was that car?!? Actually ykw nvm it prolly just had a pocket dimension or amthn this is fuckin Nightvale why am I trying to use logic

Okay #1. Secret Dragon Society that's actually Not That Secret is kinda cool, #2. WTF DO YOU MEAN STOP SIGN IMMUNITY. like don't get me wrong I *understand the temptation* but also why would you allow dom3thing so profoundly stupid and unsafe as a r e w a r d for

... for being an Alert Citizen. Ok. Ok I guess I can kinda see where they're coming from. Maybe. [Didn't sleep well last night and I'm tired so sorry if my commentary's getting lackluster]

Also stamp system for being compliant with the secret police. Yeah that's not sus at allllll

Bro I wish I could schedule my workplace to be Unknowable some days. Dot Day sounds... ominous, for a number of reasons but more so their implications than anything actually ominous, yk?

[I need sleep]

Bro I would NOT pay $5 for a music lesson like that, let alone $50

"Bake sale proceeds go to blood space war" okay invader zim

"Wednesday has been cancelled due to a scheduling error" XD honestly w my terrible sense of time that just sounds like a normal thing to me

Tfw a your perfectly good ice cream outing is inturupted by a dead lion dropping from the sky

[Continuing this like 3 weeks l8r so sorry for the Commentary Continuity Disruption Leik Woah]

Uhhhhhhhhhh so in the weeks I've been gone I threw myself back asswards into TMA content [so yes v much Spoilers First Bc I Had No Patience] and? I am. Very much getting a Smirke's Fourteen vibe from the Carrion Cloud. Also is Mr radio man. Like. Okayyy??!?!?

AND NOW THE WEATHER

🎶Waitin for the bus in the rain in the rain in the waitin for the bus in the raiiiin 😎 🎶

Damn this is actually a legit bop I would make this new ringtone no question

(Don't get me wrong I fully expect this to have Lore implications later on but for now I'm just Vibin)

NOT SURE WHAT HAPOENED MY ASS

oh. Oh, Tapes, you say??? Well. *strokes imaginary beard*

What. The fuck? Genuine Life Advice? In my horror/weirdcore podcast? It's More Likely Than You'd Think. What. qhat even is this.

Ok so vanilla smell is Important.

This List is probably important but my brain refuses to hold onto any item in detail for longer than 3 seconds. Also "clear plastic binder sheets" made me laugh SO hard for some reason

Genuine question to anyone reading this, how much should I be paying attention? Like is this a Pepe Sylvia red-stringing sort of podcast where every detail is crucial later on, or is it more sort of a go-with-the-flow, Embrace the Absurdity sort of thing?

Why was that "Goodnight, listeners" so threatening?!?!?

*deep, deep inhale* ohhhkay

Next FUCKING EPISUDE I GUESS

#welcome to nightvale #welcome to night vale #is it one word or two? #wtnv #wtnv spoilers #LucizbulliesCecil #lucifanbabbles #zizistuff