#i am here for the gay shit

[inkskinned]

it is hard to explain without sounding vain or stupid - but the more attractive others find you, the more you're allowed to do. the easier your life is.

i have been on both sides of this. i am queer and cuban. i grew up poor. for a long time i didn't know "how" to dress - and i still don't. i make my sister pick out any important outfits. i have adhd in spades: i was never "cool and quiet", i was the weird kid who didn't understand how "normal" people behave. i was bullied so hard that the "social outcasts" wouldn't even talk to me.

i got my teeth straightened. i cut my hair and learned how to style it. i got into makeup. it didn't matter, at first, if i actually liked what i was doing - it mattered how people responded to it. like a magic trick; the right dress and winged eyeliner and suddenly i was no longer too weird for all of it. i could wear the ugly pokemon shirt and it was just "ironic" or a "cute interest."

when i am seen as pretty, people listen. they laugh at my jokes. they allow me to be weird and a little spacey. i can trust that if i need something, people will generally help me. privilege suddenly rushes in: pretty does buy things. pretty people get treated more gently.

i am the same ugly little girl, is the thing. still odd. still not-quite-fitting-in. still scrambling. still angry and afraid and full of bad things. of course it became my obsession. of course i stopped eating. i had seen, in real time, the exact way it could change my life - simply always be perfect, and things can be easy. people will "overlook" all the other things. i used to have panic attacks at the idea others would see me without makeup - what would they think? even for a simple friend hangout, i'd spend a few hours getting ready. after all, it seemed so obvious to me: these people liked me because i was pretty.

i worry about how much i'm being a bad activist: i understand that "pretty" is determined by white, het, cis, able-bodied hegemonies. if i was really an ally, wouldn't i rally against all of this? recently there's been a "clean girl" trend which copies latinx aesthetics: dark slicked-back hair, hoop earrings. i almost never wear my hair like that; i can hear the middle school guidance counsellor advising me that i might fare better if i toned it down on the culture.

the problem is that i can take pretty on and off. that i have seen how different my life is on a day where i try and a day where i don't. i told my therapist i want to believe the difference is confidence, but it's not. and when you have seen it, you can't unsee it. it lives inside your brain. it rots there; taunting. i get rewarded for following the rules. i am punished for breaking them. end of story.

pretty people can get what they want. pretty people can feel confident without others asking where they got their nerve from. pretty people can be weird and different. pretty people get to have emotions; it's different when they get aggressive, it's pretty when they cry with frustration.

of course people care about this. of course it has crawled into you. of course you want to be seen as attractive. it's not vanity: it's self-preservation.

#pretty in this post is a stand in for . literally all forms of normativity #warm up #tbd maybe idk #ps! hi!! i'm queer!!!!!!!!! it is how i identify! if you tag this 'q slur' i will fight you!!! #i am using it here in the EXACT way it is NOT a slur !! i am identifying as a queer person! #this is EXACTLY how people reclaim it !!! #it's like practically ACADEMIC in this usage!! #please do any reading into what the fuck the history of the word ''queer'' is before telling me #as someone identifying as queer #that i'm a slur. that the place i find comfort in is a slur #''well it makes me uncomfortable if people use it for me'' #im sorry to hear that dude. that sucks. i hope things get easier for you soon #but you don't get to take it from ME #in case you can't tell by the REST of this piece #i DID hear queer used as slur against me. i DID get bullied with it. i DID hear a lot of shit said #i also heard it about lesbians #about ''being gay'' #about pretty much any fucking term that could describe me. #i like queer. i like how it feels. and it's mine. #you don't get to undo the work i've done personally because it makes u uncomfortable #it's ahistoric to pretend like there are ''safe'' ways to identitfy if ur queer. #none exist. it has never been safe to be like this.

[f4gwithf4ngs]

not to sound like a whore but if we’re making out and you bite my lip i’m going to moan

#SORRY sorry. sorry. #i’m not sorry. but i am #it’s just SO… <3 #anyways. is this considered nsft #mildly nsft #i guess idfk im just sayin shit!!! tagging is hard!!! #anyways here are the normal tags #fangedfagyearning #mlm #gay #mlm yearning #t4t mlm #nblm #gay yearning #mlm thoughts #mlnb #ftm mlm #gay mlm

[icarus-lestrange]

Barty: Hey Evan , let me treat you like my homework .

Evan : huh?

Barty: Slam you on the table and do you all night .

Evan: Barty , you moronic twit , you don't do your homework .

#Regulus: why am i still here #dead gay wizards #gay shit #rosekiller #marauders era #incorrect marauders quotes #barty thinks he is cassanova but hes not . #barty crouch jr #evan rosier

[dogin8]

just in case I haven't made it extra super clear, man haters please unfollow, I am in the men fandom, men are my special interest, I will post about men a lot, I do not plan to stop

#i am also a man but i feel like the wording of this ^ is funnier so #no but fr pls if you're gonna keep commenting some man hating shit on my posts. block me or smth #I'm literally a gay man i am a man who likes men there is nothing here for you

[sakebytheriver]

This was done specifically for me, because since day one(1) I have been headcanoning Gus as gay and now I have canon confirmation, can't wait for the Gustholomule kiss to solidify it 😁

#ignore me #toh #the owl house #gus porter #gustholomule #maybe im a little bitter that every bitch and their mom was climbing over each other to hc hunter as gay #and then got mad about him having acrush on willow and started being like 'god forbid a main male character is gay' #and i was like mf gus has been here since day fucking 1 and you have not given two fucking shits about him #none of you were out here hc gus as gay or pushing dana to make him gay or anything of the sort #gee i sure do wonder what the biggest difference between gus and hunter is 🤔🤔🤔 #and gee i sure do wonder whats the difference between gustholumule and huntric 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 #could it be that both parties in gustholomule is two brown boys and huntric is two pretty twinky white boys??? #whos to say #i am #i am to say #that is the reason #that is 100% the reason

[twinstarburst]

it still occasionally guts me that katsuki said “i dont expect things to change between us” while apologizing to izuku because. sir he already cares so much about you and is so nice to you and you two even seem to be on good terms now so what more could you want??

#the implied options here are #1. katsuki still has such a warped idea of what izuku thinks of him that he believes he is hated/feared #2. gay #both of these are great tbh #bakudeku #bkdk #ALSO yes im fully aware other shit is going on in the manga rn i am not caught up dont mock me for not being up to date

[the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see]

finally caved and started reading all for the game. two chapters into the foxhole court and what kind of gay fucking shit is this! also did not know there were sports in here

#idk whats going on i thought it was like the raven cycle with magic and shit its called the foxhole court??? no fae???? what the fuck!!! #and i cant understand whats happening with the sports. i didnt get it. i hope i dont need to i just know kevin is top dog of the bad dogs #neil is mid mid except hes got a death wish so they want him carnally??? #ill be reading it super slowly bc im busy but i can feel it slowly turning up the heat on my brain cells as i read. they are burning. #ive got naught but ten #and neil's not neil but he is and he has a bag of secrets he's hiding in someone else's closet like okayyyy go off author fuck whats the #authors name.... nora sakavic FUCK I SHOULDVE KNOWN NEVER TO TRUST A WOMAN NAMED NORA #i dont know...i dont know.... but also the only gay neil i know is the one from dead poets society and its hard to separate the two rn #is the rest of the book going to be like this what did i get myself into. am i mentally prepared #bc i wasnt for trc and it FUCKED! ME! UP! im STILL insane #ugh. ugh. anyway. way gayer than expected. also at one point someone asks ''how safe is safe'' and MY DISAPPOINTMENT #when the answer wasnt safe as life? immeasurable. in fact i had to close the book. went to study accounting. #ACCOUNTING. HELLO?? CAN ANYONE HEAR ME IN HERE??? #the tree speaks #all for the game #aftg #what are yalls tags? #neil josten #the raven cycle #trc

[sneezemonster15]

I usually write long shit overexplaining things but imma be brief for once.

I am so tired of the 'Sasuke and Naruto are brothers or friends' debate.

They are gay and in love. This media is gay. Full stop. Period. Just get with it or get lost.

#i am sorry i can't give two shits anymore about fans' deliberate dismissal and ignorance of Sasuke and Natuto's unique relationship #like if this story doesnt even make you question your preconceived notions about gay narratives and its portrayal in media #and you still deny everything in the story simply because of your limited view of the world #and you can't even be curious about it or doubt your understanding of the story in the face of such clear nuance #then i am sorry but you have failed the litmus test #you will pass away one day but SNS is here to stay #it will keep inspiring tons if fans such as me #and you will become more outdated than ever and SNS will stay on still being relevant #nothing you can do about it #but you can learn about it #i hope you do #sns #sasunaru #narusasu #sasuke #naruto #uzumaki naruto #uchiha sasuke

[splorpo]

What are you hating on lately? Not judging I want to join you

can we kiss on the mouth

#I JEST I JEST my actual answer rn is people who are into our flag means death and good omens are driving me up the wall #i am willing to entertain that either show might be good but the way people talk about them is so goddamn annoying that it has guaranteed #i won’t be watching them anytime soon #all i hear is ‘uwu my gay babies’ this and ‘uwu my gay babies’ that #can we PLEASE start liking things for reasons other than there are gay characters. PLEASE. #some of u genuinely don’t give a fuck about whether or not there’s anything of interest or merit within a work just as long as it’s gay #stop recommending me shit just bc it’s gay #is it also GOOD? did u think of that?? #these types of people appear to be the primary fanbase of these two shows #and were also annoying as fuck during the writer’s strike #genuinely makes me ask what year it is #it’s like superwholock in here #splorpo answers

[moregraceful]

situations need to stop happening to me

if you're like, kasper is posting a lot of cringe tonight i bet he went to a psychologically damaging meeting today. you are correct. someone invited me to a two day "seminar" to learn about congregational care and i was like yeah that sounds like a good tool to have in my toolkit ig. could always use more education about how to listen to people. went to the thingy and they were like. sike this is actually an entire ministry certification. no this is not clinical pastoral education but you will probably be functioning like you have that training so don't fuck up. btw this means your church can and will funnel all their congregational care through you and your team so i hope you are prepared to hear people going through the worst grief of their lives. yes you do have to create this ministry at your church because we trained you for free. do you have questions <3 MORE OF A COMMENT THAN A QUESTION BUT IS IT ETHICAL FOR ME TO BE IN THIS POSITION OF POWER WITHOUT CLINICAL TRAINING? have you prayed today <3 NO!!!!!!!! it's always so amazing how many situations i get into just by being stupid.

#today k called someone ''the therapy by proxy friend'' and in that moment. i knew. i knew what had happened #being in therapy almost continuously since i was 16...i am the therapy by proxy friend... #people at church were like oh kasper is very patient and often has gentle advice. i bet he'd be good. NO ITS THE THERAPY #the worst part is someone was like i hope you talked to the senior pastor abt this certification and i was like girl. he is not even in the #damn country. you said this was a seminar. i thought i was just going to learn how to be a good listener. not fuckin alskdjhakadsal;khjdal #NO i did not talk to him before coming here. did YOU talk to him about me coming here. #because by tomorrow i'll be certified in this shit and unfortunately. NOTHING EITHER OF US CAN DO ABT THAT #like what am i even DOING here. i should be in the club. i should be at gay brunch. i should have gotten a stem degree #i should be receiving gentle kisses from someone who loves me in a city far away from here where i have no troubles #i am. 9am. chugging coffee. listening to horrific testimony. wondering when someone will teach me how to be a good listener #fresno oilers.txt

[blazingblorbos]

oh god. oh god. oh.. oh gosh. I didn't expect this so soon. I didn't expect this today, I've been busy with life related things so the HYV calendar is really unbeknownst to me, is this update really next week already?? where can I rant about this- whERe can I rant about this-

oh. I made a blog for that exact purpose ! OKAY—!

fuck. fuck me, dude holy-

FUCK.

the slightly worried look on Arle's face as Snezhevna is reaching out her hand, only for her face to seemingly revert back to cold and neutral once the camera actually focuses in on her. Her tone is cold but her words are reassuring,,,,,,,,

ALSO GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. HOW GENTLY SHE HOLDS HER HAND.

the d o o r. the DOOR. THE FUCKING DOOR, CHAT. the slow opening at first, and once you can make out that it's certainly Arle's silhouette she shoves it fully open - both doors, both hands. incredibly attractive—. the FEAR in that man's eyes.

The crossed hands. We can't see her face but you know what expression she's making (it's not really an expression. it's neutral but you can feel it). THE FUCKING F E A R ON THAT MAN'S FACE.

Oh- she literally just grabbed him by the throat. Just like that- ! There's the expression. Oh, you feel it, alright. If you go frame by frame, you'll notice her eyes narrow in the slightest right before ->

POV: you're getting chocked out by Arlecchino, and that's actually the least of your worries. (my god she is beautiful).

I did not expect him to simply be thrown down to the ground and I ... d i d not expect her to step on his FACE. [insert gay masochistic joke here. you know the one]. Did not expect her to smile (this is the ONLY scene wherein we see her smile even slightly... huh...) *And the reason I say "I did not expect her to smile", is because with the momentum we were getting I thought she was straight up going to crush his throat, or stab him (hand, weapon or otherwise). It looked like she was digging the forefoot of her shoe into the guys head and not the... .. y'know deadly fucking heel, so that.. confused me. (and the sound when she supposedly stomped his head in did NOT sound all that impactful) but ANYWAYS I digress-

I'm of course assuming more happened after the cut to black because . madam where did you get that bloodstain on you—

BLOODSTAIN ON HER FACE!?!?!? (more on this in a second)

Freminet??? Freminet feature ! (not Lyney or Lynette.. interesting). :(((( the poor boy sounds so,, desensitized. His father

holy shit quick intermission. After the mental chronological fuckfest that was "The Song Burning in the Embers" I don't think I can look at Arle and the HotH the same anymore because she's.. she's like not even 10 years older than them (?) it's insane this doesn't make any sense- ANYWAYS.

HIS FATHER comes back with what we later see to be real blood on her face. Tells him "I've acquired new funds". We know what that means... HE knows what that means!!, and the way WE - THE AUDIENCE - know that Freminet knows what it means is because the boy replies "Oh.. Okay.."

LIKE-! chat omg this is truly just routine for them,,,, Like out of the 3 siblings, Freminet always gave off the biggest child assassin vibe, but wow. To see that routine and desensitized nature of the HotH's line of work just,, splayed out in a Character Trailer is . wow. and the look in his eyes as he says it is- wow.

YEAH UHH BLOODSTAIN ON HER FACE??/ The lighting in this scene now is evidently less saturated. And it's just- oh my FUCKING GOD it does so many things:

the blood on Arle's face looks... dry. it doesn't look as fresh as you may expect which could mean many things. It could mean she spent,,, hella long in there with that guy doing what needed to be done. It could mean she took care to something else immediately after dealing with the guy (perhaps smth related to the children Snezhevna wanted to save). But regardless it means she didn't put in the effort to clean her face and hide what happened. OBVIOUSLY !!! that is so . obviously her style but to S E E IT IN MY GENSHIN IMPACT CHARACTER TRAILER it's- oh my god

it serves to highlight the really, truly, bleak nature of the scene now that we know plain and simple Arlecchino just killed a man. There's no subtext, there's no reading between the lines. The only thing that didn't happen is that we didn't see contact nor see a body. But, no sugarcoating, Arlecchino killed a man. No one is hiding it. You are not surprised. No one should be but damn.

and ofc it acts as a representation of Snezhevna dying...

because it seems like the saturation is back once the camera switches to looking at Snezhevna laying in bed.

And is it me, or does it look like Arle's allowing herself to actually display a tinge of worry in her expression this time? And also, EVER so slightly in her tone as well. You can feel it, it's gentler.

"Once I'm better I'll start my next mission.."

THIS. THIS!! IN SO MANY WAYS THIS!

OKAY. so bear with me. I haven't actually read any of the sibling's character stories yet, so there could be a LOT of info I'm missing but:

There's still a pretty thought-provoking conversation going on (in MY mind, at least) about just how intensely these children are being trailed to be soldiers for the Fatui. They're obviously in an environment that indoctrinates them into being soldiers of SOME kind, but I still don't know what kind of soldier that's supposed to be. Are they all ALWAYS extensions of the Fatui? Or are they more-so extensions of Arlecchino specifically..? Snezhevna was obviously trying to help those children she came across, and I'm assuming that happened on her latest mission, so was the mission for a charitable cause?? What was her next mission supposed to be?? Same line of work? Saving people? Or would it switch up and was she going to be sent to "take care of" (kill .) someone???

So I don't know whether to interpret that line as a hint of them being overworked and 1) feeling like they need to continue their work out of pure fear that they'll be deemed ineffective and useless... or 2) feeling like they need to continue their work out of a sense of loyalty and duty to the place that took them in and raised them. Or both..

and ofc the funeral scene. I can't say much more than what's already shown right on the screen.

and am I bugging? Or is the location of the grave....

#LONG post #first of all. I am kissing Genshin Impact's (HoYovere's entire) artstyle on the mouth. #second of all #Erin Yvette #oh my god Erin Yvette. #the 'My child...' line.. what if I literally blow up the world I'm going to explode #Arlecchino is drop dead gorgeous in this. That's a given but what kind of gay person would I be if I didn't say it anyway #it's always a given with their trailers. A l w a y s. #she's so drop dead handsome oh my god I fucking hate gender #blazingramble #holy shit new tag wtf #I try not to do these on here often but... #meh. my blog #I needed a place to write it down and I'm honestly getting self-conscious abt using my discord server #I say the kids at the HotH are desensitized 'cause like.. it's FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE that they DON'T know!!!! #they can ACT like they don't !!! sure! repression is very real and these kids are exposed to a LOT of trauma. Yes #but they are NOT FUCKING IGNORANT about it #the older ones at least; of course the younger they are the more likely they're sheltered from the Fatui's violent practices #like Lyney Lynette Freminet and other kids their age are child assassins. Now I'm PRETTY FUCKIN CONFIDENT they've killed people #like it wasn't hard to believe before but (and remember I haven't read their character stories) before it was mostly believable conjecture #I can't get over the scene where she returns to the bed #Arlecchino #genshin impact #genshin #genshin arlecchino #the knave #Genshin the knave #blazingshitpost genshin edition #blazingshitpost #Youtube

[dognightmare4]

look at vex from sackboy a big adventure (available on ps4 ps5 and pc (epic games and steam))

#playstation #ps4 #ps5 #sony playstation #video game #steam game #gamers of tumblr #pc game #sackboy #sackboy a big adventure #my twitter bot died and i need to do SOMETHING with these 500+ images of him #theres a new sackboy game its 3 years old and they did a shit job advertising it so here i am #he looks like oogie boogies gay cousin #post this cat everywhere #hes literally the embodiment of nightmares but he so cute tho #ive done everything i can think of to advertise him help #i post about him constantly everywhere #i even submitted him to a tiktok show once. they didnt like him but any publicity is good publicity? #i just want more people to like my clown husband #i have seen every fanwork with him online please i need more

[ryn-loves-cheese]

here me out- being bisexual is having a very particular taste in women that are out of your league AND HAVING A LONG LIST OF FICTIONAL MEN-

#digital artist #anime #demon slayer #biseuxal #bisexual #queer #lgbt #gay #shitpost #just #well #uhm #but #wait #holy shit #wtf #why am i here #why am i still awake #im bored

[seilon]

please don’t by k.will did more for the gays back in 2012 than any boy group can possibly do with fan service and crop tops in 2024

#do young kpoppies know about please don’t by k.will. im serious do they know #I think about it a lot #it’s impossible to replicate the feeling of being gay and watching that mv in the 2010s and just getting bodyslammed by the ending. #like he really just dropped that shit in TWENTY TWELVE #kibumblabs #to this day I think that’s the most explicitly gay mv ive seen in kpop by an established artist #(ie not holland. no shade to him but he kinda built his platform on being an openly gay artist and he’s not a big industry name or anything #which makes the impact significantly different. if that makes sense. anyway.) #like think about any other example. almost all of them can be brushed off as fan service or are at least vague enough to be #up for interpretation #please don’t’s ending is nearly fucking impossible to write off as anything but explicitly gay #no fanservice involved. no vague staring in each other’s eyes. just straight up Oh He’s Not Jealous Of His Friend He’s Jealous Of His #Friend’s Fiancé. oh #like that’s the whole point. interpreting it any other way doesn’t make sense with the impact it’s purposefully supposed to make #like seriously try to say ‘he’s just sad he’s losing his friend to marriage :(‘ or something. you have to be REAL fucking stupid or #deeply in denial to make that argument let alone believe it #anyway. I appreciate this mv a lot #k.will the OG of doomed yaoi in kpop #kill me #closest contender off the top of my head is one more day by sistar #also note I am talking about mvs here not songs in general #cause if I were talking about songs in general. key’s out there pretty much writing about gay sex at this point so I mean #k.will #kpop #only adding actual tags because I want you to watch this mv if you haven’t already

[bucksboobs]

I’m the anon from the post before and I understand what you mean! I guess I just took differently when I watched the show. I don’t think Charlie or Nick was upset about Ben being closeted I think they (especially Charlie) we’re just upset how Ben treated Charlie the entire. Also I’m not saying this to be rude or start anything this is just how I saw it:) I think Charlie was angry (as he should) about how Ben treated him through out the relationship they had and not about him being closeted. Because I do believe if Ben just communicated better and treated him better and didn’t treat Charlie the way he did it could’ve worked out. I’m just saying that I didn’t see them bashing Ben for being closeted only bashing him for treating Charlie the way he did without acknowledging how it felt for him.

Yeah I don't think Charlie or Nick is mad about Ben being closeted but weirdly I think the narrative is and that's what irks me. All his issues and bad behaviors are because he's closeted (you said yourself that it's because he's closeted that he treats Charlie the way he does) but the story doesn't seem interested in exploring that so much as punishing him for it by having both Imogen and Charlie yell at him and then throwing him out of the series before he can improve at all.

And when this show is so renowned for it's love and celebration of queer experiences and identity it will always feel out of place that Ben was left out in the dust seemingly because he and his experiences were too complex.

#ben hope #heartstopper #sorry if you really like the show but I am absolutely not the only one that found the handling of Ben uncomfortable #especially when the character is so so young literally the same age as Nick #to deny him the chance to grow feels wrong to me and a lot of other gay men who didn't have our shit together by 16 #like this kid hasn't even taken his GSCE's which I assume are similar to the SATs or the Baccalauréat! #he needs to be given the opportunity to grow and he essentially gets the door shut in his face when he's trying to apologize #and to add to it Charlie gets that 'ambush me into accepting your apology' line that once again frames his own growth as a manipulation #which is FUCKED UP! #and from a writing perspective portrays the hand of the author pointing and screaming Hate This Boy Hate Him Hate Him #and the hand of the author should not be that obvious #it makes it feel disingenuous and as if Ben is just a stand in for someone who treated the author poorly #again this is all from a narrative perspective not a character perspective I want to make that clear because I see gay mutuals being lit up #by people who think Charlie should have been forced to forgive Ben or something #but thats not at all the argument any of us are making here

[fatuous-frog]

When The Moon Leaves

You are the moon that I will never reach for I am just the tide I can only yearn for you, pulled by your gravity But the cloud veiled you and the dark embraces me instead, cooing me, soothing me away from thoughts of you

#gay mlm #mlm yearning #achillean #poetry #sae's silly poems #original poem #I'm so lonely yall #I keep writing angsty shit idk why #i have an exam tomorrow #but here I am