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kulifefall2019 · 4 years

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This KU Housing Life

Prologue:

The MSU was flooded with unfamiliar faces left and right. Freshmen were checking in for student orientation. Leah was signing in when someone she recognized approached her. She was greeted by a girl she met at color guard auditions. They had a brief conversation and realized that they both made it and would be moving in soon to get ready for band camp. The girl looked at her and asked if she had found a roommate yet. Leah originally was going to room with someone from her high school, but all of the sudden, her friend bailed on their plans and decided to room with someone else. She explained the situation to the color guard girl and noticed a little bit of excitement from the response.

“Well, I don’t have any friends that go here. Would you want to room with me?” the girl laughed. She seemed nice and chipper. She would probably be a simple and easy living situation. Why not?

Not all living situations appear as magically and as simple as Leah’s freshman year experience, but finding people to live with and spend time with on campus is a big part of the college experience. Understanding the different aspects of KU housing will help incoming students navigate the different options and situations that come with living on campus. These different aspects have been broken down into three acts: Act I “And They Were Roommates,” breaking down a more in depth experience of having roommates and some of the situations that can arise living with new people; Act II “It’s a Wonderful Day in the Gayborhood,” discussing a different living option for those in the LGBTQ+ community who would prefer a more personal fit for them while they live on campus; and Act III “Visitation: Just Stopping By,” explaining the rules of visitation in certain dorm halls through personal anecdotes.

Act I And They Were Roommates:

Horror, success, and love stories can all emerge from discussions of roommates, be it in college or later in life. I talked to my friend, Anna, who’s had her fair share of roommate experiences and also works in Housing. She talks about residents making a huge scene about their roommate’s clothes on the wrong side of the room and even a mediation she had to partake in. “I tried really hard to make a good living situation with her, but we just didn’t get along well at all. She ended up switching rooms. Because it was really hard to work out our differences.”

After this unfortunate experience, Anna was able to move her best friend into her dorm room. “When we first moved in together, it took some adjusting but it works pretty well. We already had chemistry and knew each other so it was easy to set boundaries and feel comfortable around each other.”

I decided to live with three friends of mine this school year in a Dixon double. We were excited to decorate, buy wax melts, and figure out what bathroom spray to buy. Once the time came around to move in and start seeing each other every single day, the excitement faded. I remembered the constant frustrations I felt with one of the girls the year beforehand. The selfishness, constant belief that the world was after her, and unfortunate simplicity would soon be sleeping feet away from me. We’ve tried to make amends multiple times. The two other girls and I tried to change our ways of communication and attitudes, but our friendship dynamic has yet to change. My side of the room is now constantly empty. It’s peaceful and stress-free, but there’s times where that stress can revisit.

Roommate choices can be the biggest concern. It’s all about making or breaking a relationship with them. Settling for disrespect and discomfort isn’t an expectation, but being able to communicate with a roommate can make or break your residence life experience. Sometimes, simply talking things out won’t work out entirely; that’s the crappy part. However, it shouldn’t completely destroy college. Through unfortunate experiences can come a breath of fresh air. Anna was able to find success within rooming with a friend of hers after a past, rough experience. I on the other hand, haven’t had my success story yet, but I have time. It can be discovered that friends are better as just friends, not roommates, however, it can also be discovered that friends are the best roommates.

Santana Outlaw

Act II It’s a Wonderful Day in the Gayborhood

When I first came to campus, I had no idea that there was even an option for people to pick their roommates regardless of gender. I always thought of the more traditional all girls’ floors and all boys’ floors setup like how it is in Johnson Hall.

By the time my freshman year was wrapping up, a lot of my friends who were girls already had found other people to room with for the following year. Even my roommate was going to be in a full suite with some of the other people we knew from band. I was starting to panic. Was I going to have to live in a random living situation next year?

Luckily, a couple of girls from color guard were still trying to find extra people to live with. They told me we would be living with this one guy from the drumline too. They explained that because he was a member of the LGBTQ+ community, we could sign up for something that was considered a “safe place living option” where we can pick in certain halls where we want to live and who we live with, even if they are of the opposite sex/gender.

Now, I had decided to take a semester off from college, and those roommates didn’t end up being quite the right match for me in the end. This year, I went back to a traditional living option, but it’s nice to know that we have such an open and accepting campus that allows students the opportunity to make themselves as comfortable as possible in a living situation that they have more control over.

This living option is so unique that I wanted to learn more about the logistics of it outside of my personal experience in this option. I sat down with someone who works as a DR for one of the halls on campus to get more information.

She told me about how this option was originally just Stonewall Schuykill Hall, which looking at it now makes sense. It’s the one freshman hall that doesn’t have gender specific floors or bathrooms. It then expanded into other housing options like Dixon, Golden Bear Village South, and other non-freshman dorms. In these dorms, they’re room specific instead of the whole building, and people go to the housing office in the spring term before the expected year to pick out the room they’re going to be living in.

She stated that, “It’s initial purpose was to give trans, intersex, etc. individuals the chance to live with an individual that “matched” their gender identity, or someone they felt more safe with,” but was for use of all individuals, LGBTQ+ or not.

The only problem is that some people take advantage of this housing option. My friend went into more detail about the loophole, “You can’t just ask someone to ‘prove’ that they’re LGBTQ+. We aren’t given membership cards when we say our sexualities. There isn’t an office we go to to get ‘official gay’ paperwork. It’d be a ridiculous and discriminatory way to run the policy.” Therefore, anyone could sign up for this housing option, even if they didn’t exactly need it. If they just wanted to live with their significant other without having to deal with visitation, anyone could just sign up for LGBTQ+ housing.

This housing style is so great for those in our community who need it to feel safer and more at home living on campus. It’s something to keep an eye out for though, because rooms could be taken really fast.

Alyssa Heaton

Act III Visitation: Just Stopping By

As a community assistant, CA, in one of our campus’ dorm halls I frequently encounter my residents’ visitors. Whether it be greeting them when they come in, or kicking them out right before midnight so that they don’t get a violation. I see some of the visitors so often that they might as well just be a resident. They come and go, and I just have to hope that they don’t cause any problems. However, because of this if they do cause problems it becomes my problem. I have to help desk receptionists, DRs, and make sure that people aren’t just sneaking into our building. While most are just there to hang out and chill, you never really know who is going to come into the building. They could be sneaking in to drink, or who knows what else, and again it becomes my problem. Or, they could be sneaking in to try and harm another resident. I’m here to keep the residents safe, and while I can’t stop all the problems, I can at least try and make sure that those entering our building aren’t going to cause any problems for those that live there. At the end of the day, I am mostly greeting them and kicking out the guests, but I still have to make sure that they’re all safe.

One Saturday while on my midnight round, I was given a list of people who were in our building, who were never signed out, and thus had to be kicked out. Now when I went to these rooms, like usual, the guest had left and just wasn’t signed out. So this now more or less just telling people they had a violation, and to talk to our building director, BD, to now get it fixed. Now there was one girl this night, then when I informed her about the violation, she apologized to me. She felt so bad about not only not signing out her guest, and having me come tell her that she must have said sorry somewhere between 5 and 7 times.

I have also been at the desk as people try and sneak guests in, or just ignore the desk receptionist, DR, as they try and get them to stop and sign in. There was one night where a resident walked in with someone that we knew didn’t live there and when we tried to stop them to sign, they wouldn’t. Which is then a whole other issue for the CA on duty, who happened to be me that day, our BD, and possibly other residents.

When asked about the housing policies an assistant resident director, ARD, remembered an incident from her freshman year. It was right before winter break, and she was visiting friends in Dixon hall for the day. She had thought she was signed in, but it turned out she wasn't. She was not informed about not being signed in until after midnight, even after been seen by a few different DRs. ". . . had seen me throughout the day and around the building and had still waited and not said anything about it."

After she finished her story, I asked if there were any major changes to the housing policy that she has seen as either a student or in her position as an ARD. She said the biggest change was in the overnight policy. During her freshman year, it was so that ". . .you could have an overnight guest, but only if they were of the same sex. But if a guy was having over a girl or vice versa they would have to be out by 2 a.m." She saw a problem with this because of its effect on not only trans and nonbinary people, but also couples trying to spend the night together. She also said that one of the changes she would like to see not only as an ARD but as a student here at KU would be a change in the mandatory sign-in time. She says, " I understand why because then it runs the risk of intoxicated residents. But there are some visitors who can’t get here until after midnight, and maybe the host forgot to make the pass or whatever, and then it’s like what do you do? You know?"

However, she also understands that compared to other schools out policy isn't that bad, recalling a school she heard about where they don't allow overnight guests, period. So in the end, although she would like to see our policy be improved, we both agree it could be much worse.

Jessica Burton

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proxylynn · 7 years

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Dreemurr Academy #9 (FellSwap Sans)

Dreemurr Academy, a prestigious closed-off college for monsters and humans alike of all ages and worlds. This includes myself, though I'm sort of an in-between. I'm Lynsie, the human anomaly. I'm a human, but I can do magic like monsters. I'm an oddball. That's the thing about making a school that is open to multiple alternate dimensions. Weird things are bound to show up. Even a bunch of the same person. From what I saw on orientation day, the same faces are scattered around all around. To fix these type of issues, everyone that has a multiple or doppelganger is given a school name so there's no confusion. Other than that, it's fairly normal. The hierarchy is the simple. The Deans are made up of the same people, skeleton monsters that go by the name of Gaster. One is a teacher of the Sciences, goes by Wingding. He's a kind and understanding man but is known to pull a prank or two. They all speak in a typeface sign language but use telepathy magic so others understand. It's been said no one has ever heard their real voices and those that have are no longer at the academy. Another Gaster dean teaches Home Economics, he goes by Wingy. He's a bubbly sweet guy that loves his work. Nothing makes him smile more than seeing the joy on a student's face when they take pride in being able to do something they first thought they couldn't. Another Gaster dean teaches the studies of Magic, he is called Fall. At times, he can be cynical, malicious, and sarcastic. He has a commanding presence that exuded gravitas, authority, and control, able to keep a class quiet without effort. Yet there is a kindness to him, it's rarely seen, but not unheard of. Another Gaster dean teaches History, his nickname is Dings. A cold, bitter, and sometimes childish man. He tends to hold grudges against troublesome students and is extremely spiteful toward those whom he dislikes. Yet those that can take his punishments are rewarded with his respect. He is a teacher that commands respect and whose grades are earned with doom hanging over your head. The Professors are also skeleton monsters, but not all are the same person. The Psychology professor is a guy named Papyrus but goes by Stretch. He's the favorite among students because he's so laid back. He chews a toothpick in class to suppress his urge to smoke, but we all know he does so when on break. He's really good at reading students and helps out when able. All in all, he's the cool teacher. The Literature professor is a Papyrus that is called Fell. He is the one teacher everyone dreads. Very strict and old-fashioned. He does not tolerate interruptions and will humiliate those he feels need to be taken down a notch. Such things take their toll on him and often squeezes a stress ball that he keeps on his desk. But he is a very passionate man when it comes to his work and takes his subject seriously, even though this makes him into a bit of a grammar nazi which is why many students get low grades. The Biology professor is a skeleton called Sans that sometimes goes by Classic, whatever that means. He is very cheesy and comes off as lazy, making puns that have people cringe yet secretly love them. He is very protective of his students and will go out of his way to help them. He does not tolerate bullying of any kind and can be quite scary. He's the second favorite among the students. The Physical Education professor is also a Sans that goes by Pain. He is also a stern and old school type of teacher, only he tends to be crueler in the humiliation of students that are unprepared. While his scope is all around, he prefers the darker side of the study. Using borderline violence to weed out the weak that think taking his class is an easy A. There is mercy in his dojo, but it must be earned with blood, sweat, and tears. The Students are broken into four groups based on which part of the four years they are currently in. The first years are called freshmen. Second years are sophomores. Third years are juniors. And fourth years are seniors. There are some variations on this topic, but this hierarchy of college students is still readily recognizable by everyone. Me? This isn't my first rodeo but not my last. I'm a sophomore and have gotten the gist of who's who and what's what. I get along with students and teachers. I've always been a middle ground type of girl. I didn't come looking for friends, but they just seemed to find me. Funny enough, my buddies are the brothers of the professors. Stretch's brother is a freshman, his name is Sans but goes by Rascal. Fell's brother, also a Sans, is a sophomore like me and goes by Edgy. Classic's brother is a Papyrus, a freshman that goes by Papy. And Pain's brother is a sophomore Papyrus by the name of Slim. I've always been a tomboy. I prefer the company of guys. They're different and fun, even if they can be a bit odd sometimes. Rascal, as the nickname implies, is the school clown/prankster. He likes to test his limits and challenge authority, even dishevels his uniform to assert his individuality. He comes off as a slacker, but secretly very deep, clever, and loyal to a fault. He likes taking his brother's class so he can improve his skills with messing with people, mostly his brother as he disrupts his teachings when he sees a chance. Edgy is shy around new people and slow to open up, enjoying a laugh with friends when able. Though he appears weak or even nerdy because of his glasses, he is far tougher than he leads on. He doesn't take crap from anyone. When alone, he's angsty and borders on straight up angry. Getting a pissy attitude when annoyed. Like his brother, he is very passionate about literature and does his best to impress his brother, going so far as to become the teacher's pet. Papy is easily the most lovable guy in the whole school. Very cheerful and optimistic, he tries his best no matter what. He doesn't like conflict and tries to keep his brother out of trouble when the teacher pulls a prank. I find it sweet of him to take his brother's class even though he doesn't particularly enjoy it, just so he can stay close to him. Like I said, this guy is a lovable soul. Slim is easy going. He doesn't take things too seriously and never breaks a sweat over hard exams. The only thing that breaks his cool is his smoking, he really gets tense if he goes too long without his fix. He's incredibly smart and instinctual, good traits to have when dealing with his brother. While he does attend his brother's class, he merely does so as a request of his brother who likes to make sure he doesn't slack off due to not being challenged enough. All of them are oddly related to each other in some form. Gaster's, Papyrus's, and Sans's are brothers. Yet I see them all as different people. I value them. They're helping me even if they don't know it. I am not so confident in myself. I tend to isolate myself, go at things lone wolf style. It's how I've always been. Then I met them and slowly my world began to expand bit by bit. I'm still not comfortable with others. But with them, I can step out from behind my mask for a bit, and really be myself around them. Today is a typical day. Classes have been their typical medium level of difficulty, nothing special really. Yet the final bell has chimed and I'm still in school. No, I don't have detention, that's not a thing in college. Study hall then? Nope, I'm not there either, though I should later so as to be ready for next week's exams. No, I'm surprisingly in the gymnasium and working out. Years of shitty public school that don't care about your health or education have left my body in need of as much exercise as can get. At first, I didn't think I was in that bad of shape, then I tried doing a pull-up on day one and couldn't even get my head near that damn bar after ten minutes of hanging there like a poster cat. That's when I decided to fix that because frankly, it makes me feel pathetic. Now I do anything I can that I see as a better alternative. Need to go somewhere? I walk or bike. Got to get to a higher floor? Stair climb that bitch! You see where I'm going with this. Luckily, I also have help from a kind of personal trainer. When I first entered his class, Professor/Coach Pain was less than thrilled about me. If I recall correctly, after I got winded running a couple laps he said I was a 'redundant horse'. Meaning, the will is there to work but lacking the ability to do anything, much like if a racehorse had only three legs. While this did hurt, I used it as motivation. I was relentless in showing him that I was determined to not give up, no matter how many colorful insults he used to break me. This earned me his respect and with that, we were able to make a little deal. He'd agree to train me after hours as long as I clean up the gym. Needless to say, we've been doing this for about two years now and he sees me as a proud pet project. "KEEP IT UP! YOU'RE DOING GREAT." "Yes, sir." "DON'T SLOW DOWN!" "I'm not trying." "COME ON, YOU WEAK PILE OF SHIT! I SAID TWO HUNDRED PUSHUPS, NOT ONE FIFTY!" "I'm doing it! *sharp gasp* Get off my back!" "DON'T BACK SASS ME! IF I WANT EXCUSES, I'LL GO TELL PAPYRUS TO PICK UP HIS FUCKING SOCKS!" "Argh! No, I mean literally, get off my back! *wincing* I think something snapped!" Normally I meet his demands, even when he adds himself to my weight set, but not today. He gets off me and I drop with a sharp groan. "OKAY, WIMP. WHERE'S THE DAMAGE AT?" "The lower back. Just above the dip of the coccyx." He feels under my tank top along my back and I jolt at the sudden pain that hits when he applies some pressure. "*sigh* YEAH, YOU PULLED SOMETHING. FEELS LIKE A LIGAMENT TO ME. HAVE YOU BEEN LIFTING ANYTHING HEAVY LATELY?" "I helped a new student move into my building. They didn't have much, but the few things they had were crammed with stuff that didn't seem heavy." "YOU IDIOT. WHO SAID YOU WERE ALLOWED TO PUSH YOURSELF LIKE THAT? BECAUSE I KNOW I DIDN'T." "You know me. I don't back down just because something's hard." He just shakes his head in disappointment. "YOU CAN BE SUCH A DUMBASS, YOU KNOW THAT?" "I've been called worse." "SEEMS THIS PART OF TRAINING IS DONE FOR NOW. CAN YOU MOVE AT ALL?" "I should be okay in a bit..." I roll myself over so I'm flat on my back. "Just let that part relax before we go hardcore again." "*scoff* YOU HUMANS HAVE SUCH PITIFUL BODIES. IT AMAZES ME THAT YOU DON'T ALL BREAK LIKE FINE CHINA." "No argument there, sir. *weak sigh* I envy you." To that, he looks at me funny. "HOW SO?" "You're a magic skeleton. You don't need muscles to move. Tendons to hold you together. Fat to make energy. Skin to shield your form. You are pure, bare bones. You boggle my mind with how you work from an evolutionary standpoint, but then again, that doesn't really matter. You're perfect." That floors him and at the same time strokes his ego. "WELL, THAT IS TRUE. A BODY AS PERFECT AS MINE IS A BLESSING TO BEGIN WITH. BUT WHY STOP THERE? *flexing* TRAINING HAS ONLY INCREASED MY VALUE. *pose* THESE BONES HOLD MORE POWER THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLY IMAGINE." I smirk. "I don't know. My imagination is mighty limitless." I slowly try sitting up, inching ever so gently into a normal 90° angle with a few weak winces. "ANY BETTER?" "Still sore. But still good enough to keep going." "DON'T PUSH IT. PUT ENOUGH STRESS ON THAT THING AND YOU'LL BE IN A SLING FOR AGES." "I meant swimming. It's how we always end things and it's easier on the body. Less gravity in water with added mobility." "KILLER IDEA. NOW, DO YOU NEED ANY HELP?" "Nah, I can make it to the pool. And if I can't, I can always crawl or roll." "...GOOD TO KNOW." Normally I'd swim in my swimsuit, but with my current back issue, moving around like that to change would be a stupid thing to do. So in light of not wanting to fuck my back up and go to the hospital, I'm swimming in my gym clothes. Rolling is not a preferred option, just a last resort, but I am able to crawl my way over to the pool. Though I do feel a bit weird because I can sense Pain watching me as I do so. I'm used to him watching me, but this...This feels different as I slide into the lukewarm water. Ah, the water. It's my home away from home. As weak as I was on land, once in the water there was no match. Sure, I'm not the top swimmer. These monster girls named Undyne and monster boys named Aaron, most of them make up the swim team, but I like to think I'm okay by comparison. I can move like melted butter in a hot skillet. And he knows it too. Once I'm in the pool that 'redundant horse' turns into a 'seamless otter'. I know, he's not the most creative in metaphorical animal comparisons, but they make sense anyway. Pool training consists of his more intense training. The endurance workouts are based on time instead of distance. The speed workouts include 50-yard swims for sprint and Olympic, and 100-yard swims for longer distance training. And the technique workouts help improve my swim mechanics and include both kicking and stroke drills. The one-arm drill is always a fun starter. Swim 25 yards with the left arm only, followed by 25 yards with the right arm only, then swim 50 yards with both arms. This teaches you to develop a more even stroke. When performing the kicking drills, I try to drive the kick from my hips with knees slightly bent. Think of dancing the twist but with a slower motion so you are incorporating more of your thigh muscles. This will help develop a more powerful kick. Of course, we don't do this kind of stuff every day. It's important to take a day or two off between each workout to rest and recover. I swim continuously for 30 to 35 minutes; starting slow and building speed. The last five minutes being a hard effort but not all out and with no more than 90 percent max heart rate effort. Warm-ups are usually by swimming 400 yards easy then 50-yard sprints with a 30-second recovery between each sprint with 10 to 12 sprints before trying to add an additional 50-yard sprint each week, up to but not exceeding 18 sprints total. Swim 100 yards becomes super easy after all that but that's not all. Then there's doing 6 x 25 yards at 45-second intervals; swimming at 85 percent max heart rate. Cooling down with 300 slow laps and then warming up with 300. Then 200 yards pull with buoy, kick 200 yards as we enter the main set with eight 100-yard sprints with 1-minute rest between intervals, adding an extra 100-yard sprint each consecutive week up to, but not exceeding, 16 total sprints. Cool down with 200 yards easy then warm up 300 yards easy. 200 yards drill, 200 yards kick, 500 yards pull with a buoy. Trying to breathe every three strokes for 100 yards, while for the next 100 yards trying to breathe every 5 strokes, and then repeat. Also trying to alternate sides when taking a breath with the goal to increase lung oxygen intake and learn how to breathe on both sides. Cool down with 300 easy. That's when we dial it back at the end of the week to maximize taper. Warm up 300 to 400 yards with the main set of eight 50-yard sprints with 30 seconds recovery. Cool down 300 yards. 800 yards easy swim. And that's my month in just the pool, not counting all the normal gym workouts he puts me through. In short, this is Olympic level training. For example, to qualify for the 2016 Summer Olympics, a swimmer had to be able to swim the length of a pool in about 23 to 26 seconds. That's 50 meters or a few feet longer than the length of a football field in LESS THAN 30 SECONDS! The typical training schedule is working out in the pool twice a day, six days a week. But since this isn't anything more than him helping me to not be a lump of blob goo, we don't hit this as much. But that doesn't mean that the pool workouts aren't intense as fuck. The sprinting workouts focus on developing power and speed in the water. So sometimes I might sprint while hooked up to a power rack, a device that adds resistance as I move through the water so that I have to work even harder to keep going. I also do kick sets to work the legs and pull sets to isolate the arms. We work controlling my breathing with hypoxic workouts, which require me to limit breathing or hold my breath altogether. This also clocks in some serious distance, to the tune of 6 to 12 miles of swimming in a single workout. Sprinters have to train to develop their aerobic capacity, which means doing a lot of yardage. What's yardage? Are you sitting down? Something in the neighborhood of 10,000 to 20,000 meters (6 to 12 miles), or 100 to 200 laps in a single workout. Training outside the pool is no joke, either. We lift weights, run, do yoga, Pilates, you name it. Literally, everything we do on land is meant to complement some aspect of swimming, so typically training outside the pool is coordinated by Pain. But this doesn't mean he aims me to get all buff. The key to lifting as a swimmer is to get stronger so you have more power in the pool but to stay as lean as possible and not put on too much muscle mass, which makes you heavier in the water. Shoulder stabilization exercises, which are essential to building the strong, durable shoulders swimmers need to swing their arms over their heads over and over. Beyond that, most swimmers' lifting programs will be designed around the stroke they specialize in, I specialize in the Breaststroke. Doing lots of heavy squats and lunges and core exercises work for the breaststroke, and shoulder and arms workouts to help upper body for the freestyle stroke. All that training means lots of eating, which is usually a girl's worst nightmare. If you're going to be swimming twice a day, lifting weights three times per week, and also doing sprints, yoga, and Pilates, you're going to need a lot of fuel. It's estimated that female swimmers eat 3,000 to 5,000 calories per day and male swimmers about 5,000 to 8,000 per day during training. To put that in perspective, a 25-year-old guy who is 6'0'' that weighs about 165 pounds and exercises a few times per week would need about 2,400 calories per day to maintain his weight, and a 25-year-old woman who's 5'5'' and weighs about 140 pounds and works out a few times per week would need about 1,900 calories per day to maintain her weight. After about a month of this, Pain starts to taper me or adjust my activity level so that I'm fresh and ready to go all out on personal reward day. During the taper, we stop all training except the pool workouts, and the pool workouts are tweaked to be less demanding. But outside of the pool workouts, I will sometimes give up all activity, no matter how low intensity it is. Maybe just veg out in bed for a day and watch anime, or hang out with friends till into the late hours. You know, fun stuff. It all helps in recovery, but what really relaxes me are massages and a good cracking at the chiropractor to stay healthy and strong. However, because of the pain in my back, I don't end up lasting very long. Maybe close to an hour at most before something gives. "*gasps* Timeout! Fuck! *blurbles*" I barely have enough time to paddle back into the shallows as my limbs give out and I end up grasping on the pool edge rim to keep from going under. "WHAT HAPPENED? WHAT'S WRONG?" "I can't...I can't feel my legs." He jumps in and grabs my right leg. Lifting it, feeling it, and bending it. "CAN YOU FEEL ANY OF THIS?" "Just barely. It's numb with a pins and needles tingle. Like when you lay on a body part and it falls asleep from lack of circulation, then when you get off it and blood flows again giving a little boost to the misfiring nerves and making the tingling seem worse, but eventually, the nerve signals begin to flow properly again. Yet, as far as I know, nothing is cutting off circulation." "SO YOU DON'T FEEL THIS?" He pinches the skin. "Feel what?" "HMMM...HOW ABOUT THIS?" He stabs into the flesh with the points of his finger bones, drawing slight blood. "A little bit. Not a lot, but a little." "INTERESTING. IS IT JUST THE LEGS? CAN YOU MOVE THEM?" "I don't know. The top half feels fine. This could be a temporary paralysis. Right?" "HMMM...IT COULD BE STRESS RELATED. TOO MUCH MENTAL CRAP CAN EFFECT THE BODY PHYSICALLY." "Damn it...*sigh* Human bodies are so lame!" "NOW I WOULDN'T SAY THAT..." Carefully, he removes his fingertips from my skin and rubs tenderly into it. Seeing if he can "JUST LOOK AT YOURSELF. WHEN WE FIRST MET, YOU WERE FAR FROM THIS STRONG BUCK THAT YOU ARE NOW." "You do know that bucks are male deer, right?" "DON'T CARE, MY POINT STILL STANDS. YOU WERE A GLOB OF FRESH CLAY, READY TO BE MOLDED INTO ANYTHING. AND WITH MY GUIDANCE, YOU HAVE BECOME SOMETHING MORE THAN JUST NORMAL RUN ON YOUR BRAIN KIND OF GIRL. YOU'VE GOTTEN A BODY THAT ONLY THE STRONG CAN GET AND IT SHOWS. MMMM DOES IT SHOW..." "Uh, what?" "YOU'VE BECOME SO TONED. SO WELL DEFINED. EACH STRONG MUSCLE CAREFULLY HONED TO BE POWERFUL AND YET DESCRET. NO ONE CAN TELL BY LOOKING AT YOU JUST HOW STRONG YOU REALLY ARE. THAT IS OF COURSE, TILL THEY FUCK UP AND YOU HAVE TO KICK SOME ASS." "But you're wrong." "HUH?" "I've always been strong. Muscles mean nothing compared to inner strength. Sure, you can't pick up heavy shit with inner strength, but you can carry the weight of the world and all its troubles with it. And that's the strength I've ever needed." There is silence for a time. "ARE YOU OKAY? NOT BULLSHITTING OR ANYTHING, I'M LEGITIMATELY ASKING IF YOU'RE ALRIGHT." "Regardless of my answer, you won't believe me. Besides, any issues I have I'll discuss with Professor Stretch. After all, he is the psychology professor." "SO, WHAT? YOU DON'T THINK YOU CAN CONFIDE IN ME?" "Why? What's it to you?" "BECAUSE I CARE, DAMN IT!" I'm rendered stunned as he drops my leg and pulls me to his chest from behind. "S-sir?" "YOU STUPID GIRL. WE'VE SPENT THE BETTER PART OF TWO YEARS TOGETHER. ARE YOU REALLY TRYING TO TELL ME THAT YOU DON'T SEE ME AS ANYTHING MORE THAN JUST YOUR TEACHER?" "Pain...That's not it." "THEN TELL ME. TALK TO ME. I AM MORE THAN JUST A COACH. I'VE HELPED TO MAKE YOU INTO WHAT YOU ARE NOW. SO SPEAK TO ME." "I can't." "WHY NOT?!" "Because I like you!" Oh, the awkwardness. "Y-YOU...LIKE ME?" "*sigh*...Yeah." "WOW. YOU SOUND REAL HAPPY ABOUT IT." "I'm sorry. I don't mean it like that. As bad as it makes me sound like a cheesy high school sitcom cliché, but I suck when it comes to feelings and junk. I've never really been able to express myself without worrying about the consequences, so I end up bottling my feelings and tossing that bottle far into bottomless abyss that is my subconscious. Yet lately that's getting harder to do." "OH? DO TELL." If I could move I'd so be trying to flee right now. "I tend to dream of things." "REALLY? WHAT KIND OF...THINGS~?" There's a teasing air to his voice and it makes me want to cringe at how vulnerable I am. "DO YOU DREAM OF ME? ARE THESE DREAMS NAUGHTY~?" "Don't be so cocky." "THAT DOESN'T ANSWER THE QUESTION." "I don't have to answer if I don't want to." "FINE. BUT THAT JUST TELLS ME THAT YOU, NO PUN INTENDED, HAVE WET DREAMS OF ME." I'm used to his brother and some of my other friends making puns, so of course, this makes me snicker. "Well, I will say some of them really made a splash." That makes him blush with a cringe. "DID YOU REALLY NEED TO MAKE A PUN?" "Oh no, am I in hot water?" "STOP IT." "No need to boil over sir." "STOP." "Wow, you look steamed." "I SAID STOP!" "Or what?" "OR THIS!" Tilting my head towards him, he slams his mouth to mine and shuts me up. It takes a moment for my brain to register what is happening and another moment to realize I'm kissing him back, not that he seems to mind by the sound of him softly moaning in content. Slowly he pulls back, letting the feeling linger on my lips and to take in the satisfaction of having me blush so hard. "HAD I KNOWN IT WAS THIS EASY TO RENDER YOU SPEECHLESS, I WOULD'VE DONE SO MUCH SOONER." "Not sure if you're flirting or just being honest there." "A BIT OF BOTH. BUT IF I WERE TO TRUELY FLIRT, YOU WOULDN'T STAND A CHANCE IN BEING ABLE TO CONTROL YOURSELF." "*scoff* You're ego is so massive it's truly what is filling this pool." "HEH HEH...CUTE." "Don't call me cute." I scoop up some water and swing it at his face. Pain gasps and stumbles backward, letting me go as I keep splashing him as I move back to the pool wall for support. My legs still won't respond but I can at least somewhat stand on them. Suddenly, he retaliates with a splash of his own across the surface to push a large wave over me, a daring look in his glowing indigo eyes. I know that look, that's the look of someone about to do something stupid. So before he can make another move, I retaliate with more splashes of my own. Thus a war begins. He laughs with a grin as we keep splashing each other over and over again. It's getting harder to shield myself with one arm, but I do my best to splash back in defiance, even if it's sloppy. Part of me feels like a child at a playground, completely letting loose by playing this up more and more as you give in to the way this feels. I can't remember the last time I simply went with the flow and enjoyed the moment. Eventually, he stops mercilessly splashing me as he's managed to bring himself closer to me and the room for splashing is now too limited. My back now firmly pressed to the wall, water dripping off my flushed face, and an ethereal luminescent glow from the light of his eyes colors the rippling surface of the water. It's only after making eye contact does he brings his hands down on either side of me, caging me with no escape and I feel his breath on me as he leans in closer, keeping his eyes locked on mine. "YOU CAN BE A REAL PAIN IN THE ASS WHEN YOU WANT TO BE, YOU KNOW THAT?" I blink a few times before snickering. "And you're a literal Pain. But for real, if that's an example of you flirting than you really need to bone up on your studies." He sighs and headbutts me, earning him a yelp from me and surprise from how loud the clacking sound was. "What the fuck was that for?!" "FIRST OFF, THAT WAS FOR BEING STUPID AND FOR MAKING PUN OF ME. AND SECOND, I HAVE YET BEGUN TO FLIRT." "Oh, then, by all means, coach casanova, woo me. I'd like to see something more romantic than a skull bashing." "YOU MOCK ME NOW, BUT LET IT BE KNOWN I DID WARN YOU AHEAD OF TIME." "Yeah-yeah. Whatever you say, sir." Bringing his hands up, he cups my face in his palms. The callous structure of his fingers slowly grazing over my cheekbones as his eyes follow this movement, enjoying the softness of skin on his fingertips. I try not to show any emotion from his actions, having seen this as a contest of wills, if he really wishes to court me then he has to earn it...But what's a contest without a little competition? My hands pierce through the water and gently hold his face, copying his movements. I see in his eyes that look I know all too well from training with him, that never back down and never surrender look. Oh, it is so on! "I thought you were going to flirt with me?" "ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS." He pulls us together like magnets and I close my eyes as my lips press over his mouth. Even though we have kissed but a short time ago, nothing has made an impact more than the deep kiss we share now. It's as if the world has fallen away from beneath me, the water has dissipated in the air, and the only thing that matters is this simple action, locking us together in silent agreement that everything has changed. Nothing feels as heavy and as powerful as this. As I hold him gently between my palms, pressing him closer and deeper to me as I part my lips, I sigh with content as I slowly move over his mouth with my own, completely drinking him in much to his enjoyment. "MMMM...MY CHARM HAS GOTTEN TO YOU ALREADY I SEE~" "Heheh...Not quite. You're not the only one that knows how to make someone swoon~." "IS THAT A CHALLENGE~?" "You bet your bony ass it is~." "WELL THEN...CHALLENGE ACCEPTED~!" He pushes against me in response. I find myself leaning back against the wall as he suddenly leads the way in our little battle's dance, almost as if he's quickly able to let loose everything he's held back for who knows how long. Now with the lines of student and teacher have been forgotten, he's finally able to show me exactly what he's been thinking of when he watches me workout. And it takes all the strength within me to stop my eyes from flying open in surprise as his kiss paces from kindly gradual to passionate and teasingly demanding. Suddenly, I realize I'm sinking further into the water as my legs are beginning to bend, but that's when he grabs a firm hold of my shoulders and pulls me closer to him. And by the way his hands are clawing at my skin, I can tell that he has no intention of letting me go anytime soon...Which I don't mind one bit. "Thank you." "IT'S LIKE I TELL YOU EVERY TIME WE TRAIN...I'VE GOT YOU." "Awww...Then allow me to return the favor~." I wrap my arms around his neck and heatedly kiss him with passion. His hand snakes away from my shoulder to bury itself deep in my hair and pushes me against his mouth as he guides my lips apart, filling it completely with his tongue. My mind is starting to haze and dip into the unknown. I feel heart begin to pound as my hands start to wander, trembling fingers find their way to caress the back of his skull while others lace themselves in the vertebrae of his neck and tickle each bone with careful interest. He kisses like he's waited for this from the very beginning and vaguely I wonder if this is true. But no coherent thought is found as he seizes me completely to his control. "SUCH A GOOD GIRL...MMMMMM...I'LL MAKE YOU MINE~." "I'd enjoy it if you try...Sans~." Dropping his teaching name to speak his true name in such a sultry tone sets him off. He urgently tugs my hair back, throwing my head back as my lips break away from his. I gasp a breathless plead for more but am quickly stifled into silence as he grazes his mouth over the skin of my neck until he bites a responsive area that forces a moan out of me. My fingers dig into his bones as he moves his mouth over the skin, biting and sucking at that one sensitive spot that is driving me insane! Just barely I can feel my toes curl and my eyes flutter at the feelings he is giving me. Damn it, he's gotten to me so easily with this neck action and I hate that I'm giving into it! But after a good amount of time, he gradually pulls back to glance at the mark he's made and stares at the physical proof that he's scathed my skin. He sharply sucks air in through his teeth with a shaky shudder. "YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW CLOSE I CAME TO CLAIMING YOU. TO FUSE SOME OF MY MAGIC INTO YOUR FLESH FOR ALL TO SEE THAT YOU BELONG SOLELY TO ME." "What stopped you?" "TO QUOTE YOU, MY INNER STRENGHT. TO MARK SOMEONE AS A MATE IS NOT A THING TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY. THINK OF IT AS THE MONSTER EQUIVALENT OF A HUMAN MARITAL CONTRACT." I just stare at him. "Yeah...No do that, please. That's too big a leap." "NO SHIT. IT'S WHY I HELD BACK. WHO DO YOU TAKE ME FOR? MY BROTHER PAPYRUS?" "Hey, Slim is a great guy. And he does a lot to make you happy, lay off him." "LAY OFF HIM? ...FINE." "Really? Wow, I didn't think it was that easy." "THAT'S NOT IT." "Then...What's up?" He leans forward to press his mouth against my ear, catching the edge of the lobe away from the earrings between his sharp teeth as his wandering fingers gradually wade through the water and slide down the curves of my body. "I'D MUCH RATHER LAY ON YOU INSTEAD~." I pout at his remark but close my eyes anyway and try to relax to his attention. "YOU WORK SO HARD. IT'S MADE YOU SO TENSE. LET ME TAKE THAT AWAY. LET ME MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD. LET ME HEAL YOU~." He lets loose a throaty groan against in my ear as he slips his digits past the hem of my gym shorts and slowly pushes his hands along my thighs, making me shiver. Maybe he has a point. Not about the sex stuff, but other thing. If my current pain and paralysis are stress related from being wound up so tight, then perhaps a little physical release wouldn't hurt. It's worth a shot at the very least. "Okay. But be gentle with me. I'm, um...Inexperienced in this kind of stuff." I feel so embarrassed, and the look he has only makes it worse. "YOU'RE A VIRGIN?" I just nod. "OH...WELL THEN...I SHALL DO MY BEST. BUT ONLY IF YOU GIVE ME THE OKAY." I'm taken by surprise by his kind yet roguish eyes and it fills me with warm trust. "I give you consent." "VERY WELL THEN. YOU JUST RELAX AND I'LL TAKE CAKE OF YOU. BUT JUST A HEADS UP, THIS MIGHT GET...INTENSE." I can tell in the raw tone of his voice that he's not lying and I mentally brace myself for things to come. His hand dives deeper, going into my panties and I hold him tighter in shock which makes him snicker. For a second, I wonder what's wrong with my body as this weird feeling is stirring inside me, and right now I'm not if I should say anything about it. But before I can find the words I want to speak, a sudden unrelenting force is pushed between the folds of my sex, moving expertly over my clit and almost instantly a sharp intensive bout of pleasure pierces through every inch of my body as I tremble beneath his fingers. "Oh...oohh...oooohh...!" The pool water makes his fingers slippery and fast, penetrating me without difficulty to massage my insides, all while I uncontrollably arch further into him. My entire body tingles like lightning, the incredible strength in my core is pulsating harder and harder, threatening to take me to all new ethereal levels the likes of which I've never known before. He watches intently, eating up my building pleasure and taking pride in that it's all because of him. He licks his teeth hungrily as his voice rips through his throat in a low growl. "CAN YOU FEEL IT YET? THAT BURING NEED DEEP INSIDE. A FEELING THAT SOMETHING IS MISSING AND YOU HAVE TO GET IT TO BE COMPLETE. YOU FEEL IT, YES?" "Yes! Please...I need it!" "HEH HEH HEH...GOOD GIRL. MMMMMM...YOUR VOICE IS SO ATTRACTIVE WHEN YOU'RE NEEDY. BUT I BET IT SOUNDS EVEN BETTER WHEN YOU MOAN~." His movements become less teasing and gradually get faster into the perfect rhythm. I feel my heart pumping with fiery blood as I quietly plead for mercy in silent whispers. "OH NO, THAT WON'T DO. I WANT TO HEAR YOU. YOUR PLEASURE. YOUR NEED. GIVE ME WHAT I WANT." "P-pain...P-please..." "TUT TUT, NAUGHTY GIRL. THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID." He pinches my clit and I scream. "Sans!" "*deep chuckle* MUCH BETTER. NOW...LISTEN AND DO AS I SAY. CUM FOR ME." I'm so used to obeying him, be it from school or personal training, that when he gave that command my muscles tighten and the heaviness in my core suddenly burst into an intense explosion of bliss. Sweat blends into the water as it drips off my quivering body. I claw my fingertips over the back of his shoulders while trembling against him, riding the waves of my first climax amongst the small waves of the water bump us. "Fuuuuck...Is this real life?" I sound messed up, words come out in garbled low moans that are just barely coherent. This just makes him laugh. "THAT, MY DEAR, IS WHAT IS CALLED AN ORGASM." "*mumbles* You have magic fingers. *drunken giggles*" "TELL ME...WOULD YOU LIKE TO FEEL THAT AGAIN?" "Oooh, pretty please?" "EAGER THING YOU ARE. I LIKE THAT~. SO DON'T WORRY, MY LOVE DRUNK PET, I INTEND TO GIVE YOU THAT AND SO MUCH MORE~." His fingers slip out of me and he pulls my shorts down along with the underwear before doing the same to himself, revealing his magic indigo member which lights up the pool even more. I'm so sensitive still, the movement of the water alone as he helps to get this ready has me mewling and it spurns him on to do this even more. "HOW ARE YOUR LEGS? ANY BETTER?" "I can move my feet, but my knees are still weak." "YOU'RE WELCOME." I laugh at his cockiness as he skims his hands over my thighs then lifts me up just a little higher against the pool wall for better bracing. I keep his lustful gaze as I clutch onto his shoulders and he moves my legs apart. Now in position, his hands float beneath me as I'm held at an agonizingly close distance from him and now there's only one thing left to do. He eyes me with desire, I nod once more in case he needed to know again that this was alright with me, and with that acknowledged...It happens. He enters me. "O-Oh fuck..." "THAT SEEMS TO BE YOUR FAVORITE WORD." "Don't mock, just bone." "FINE. BUT YOU HAVE TO STOP MAKING PUNS." "Deal." He buries his face against the base of my neck, catching shoulder skin between his teeth as he groans and slowly grinds into me at a slow pace. Every small thrust, every tiny jab he makes within me is met with a powerful response deep in my abdomen. My fingers draw lines over the back of his skull, his hands grab a tight hold of my thighs, and I stifle the urge to scream as the head of his erection suddenly hits a bundle of nerves deep inside. "Oooh shit...Sans...Why are you so big?" "ALL THE BETTER TO FUCK YOU WITH, MY DEAR~." I'd smart off about that if I wasn't chocking on moans. My sex is as sensitive as I've ever felt it before, and it's driving me crazy! And I wouldn't mind it if it weren't for his smug expression. "YEAH...THAT'S MY GIRL...MMMMMM...YOU LIKE BEING FULL...OOOOOH...I LIKE FILLING YOU TOO...GOD, YOU FEEL SO GOOD ON ME..." "All the better to please you, sir~." "SO NAUGHTY. YOU CAN KEEP IT UP SO LONG AS YOU OBEY." "I can try, but I make no promises~." "GOOD. *shudders* SO GOOD...GOING TO PICK UP THE PACE..." His thrusts gradually speed up, faster then faster, filling me more and more, sending my mind into space at the feel his length grazing the sensitive nerves in my core. Never have I experienced something as powerful and as intense as when he thrusts into me, faster, harder...Losing all sense of himself in me, his tongue hanging carelessly out his mouth and the sight of his contorted expression, burning bright with an indigo flush setting his face aglow, sends me careening over the edge. "Sans...I'm...Ooooh...I'm close. Sans...Aaah!" "SAY IT AGAIN. *groan* SAY MY NAME. TELL ME WHO YOU BELONG TO. WHO IS GIVING YOU SO MUCH PLEASURE!" He orders, pushing himself mercilessly into me until the feelings stirring deep within me start to spiral deliciously between my legs and he can barely take looking at my submissive expression. Gasping out whimpers as drool trails indiscreetly out my can't seem to shut mouth and my eyes rolling back in pleasure, yeah, I'm a mess. His raw voice is laced with uncontrollable lust as he grips a hold of my waist in his impossibly strong skeletal arms. I grasp a tight hold of him, nails digging into his bones as I leave lines over his skeleton. A sharp gasp synchronizes with his harsh thrusts and in between the delicious rhythm of his movements, I try my best to make sense of my spiraling thoughts to answer him. "Sans! Saaahns...S-sans..." This is it. I can feel climax coming, reaching to its absolute limits, and Pain feels it too. His member pulsating with the urge to release. It's impossible now. He can't hold himself back any longer if he even was to begin with, not when he can feel my body tightening around him in all the right ways. Suddenly he cups my face in his hand as he forces me to look directly at him. In his sockets that at any other time are filled with annoyance and anger, there is unfathomable desire. In his eyes which normally can burn an everlasting hole in your soul, there's a passion to love me as tenderly as possible. I can feel it in his hands, holding me like I were fine marble. And the feeling of being wanted by him finally tips me off the fucking cliff. "CUM WITH ME. I WANT TO FEEL YOU MERGE WITH ME." If he spoke more, I know not. His words to me blur out with all other sound, everything goes silent and the world flashes out in blinding light before slowly coming back. My short visit to Heaven has me return to a sight that sets me off more. He releases everything he's held back from me all this time. He relentlessly fills my body with his magic sex juice as I feel my climax quivering tortuously over his member. The waves of the water crashing against the both of us as his fast-paced thrusts push them back and forth against our forms until we both stiffen, giving in to the intensive release of our orgasms. The sheer power of dual climax is like nothing I've ever experienced before. I'm careening through euphoric plains of being, as if I've shed away this human skin and fractured into millions of pieces against him, blending in with the water to melt into liquid. And as my mind spins alongside his, I wonder what has to be going on in that skull of his at this moment. A soft indigo light burns from within his chest, just as a weak pink light glows from within me. Through the misty haze of orgasm, I can see it clearly now. As our bodies connect, so do our souls. It's as if both of our forms have collided together, experiencing the ethereal feeling of sharing one existence. And I breathe deeply as if it's my last breath...I could get used to this. Thankfully Pain doesn't let go when I collapse on him. All the training and sex have me completely drained. My arms fall limply over his shoulders and his hands catch me in his embrace. He's so warm, in a wet and comforting sort of way. But deep down I know he's still a ball busting tight ass that likes to make me mad so I can try to prove him wrong. Funny how now I see that as incredibly sweet. It will probably still piss me off, but it's still sweet of him. It shows he cares. And if he's willing to do so, then so should I. I press my lips against his neck vertebrae and smirk when his bones heat up in response. I delight in the synchronized pace of our heavy breathing. We're both spent but most likely yearning for more. It's too little and too much all at once. But we do need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised. Best save the fun for later for now. I affectionately hold him close to my trembling body, eventually feeling his length fade away from deep inside me as he makes his way over to the ladder and with one swift motion he lifts me out of the water onto the side of the pool so I don't drown from muscular exhaustion. He wasn't kidding about having a strong body for a skeleton. "I TAKE IT YOU CAN AND CAN'T MOVE NOW." "*yawn* Pretty much." "WE SHOULD ADD THIS TO OUR TRAINING REGIMENT." "Totally." He moves some hair from my face and rubs my cheek, making me smile. "BE RIGHT BACK, TOUGH GIRL. I CAN'T TAKE YOU HOME WITHOUT YOUR PANTS, NOW CAN I?" I giggle with a weak nod and push myself further away from the pool before I pass out, but in my last moments of consciousness, I see him dive into the water and pop back up to proudly hold up my panties. Oh my god...He's fucking adorable! That's it, I've made up my mind indefinitely now. I'm in love with you, Pain. Nothing will ever be able to change this fact, even if you tried.

#undertale #underfell #underswap #fellswap #dreemurr academy #underversity #sans #papyrus #gaster #buttercupsticksnlicks

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howtomusicmajor · 7 years

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How to Make Friends in College

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One of the scariest things many people go through when they first get to college is the process of Meeting New People. If you’re really lucky, you may have one or even TWO friends from high school who attend the same college as you. However, an unfortunate fact of life is that even the best of high school friends will drift a little once they hit college, and trying to cling to someone is the best way to make them uncomfortable. Plus it’s important to have more than one friend. So even if you’re SURE that your best friend from high school is both, A) going to the same school as you, and B) will NEVER EVER drift away from you, you should be prepared for the process that is getting to know folks.

The first thing you should know is that freshman tend to clump together their first week. You’re going to meet a bunch of people during your orientation, and you will cling to them like they are life rafts in a vast ocean. Do not expect more than a few of these people to be your long-term friends, however. Most of the people you meet in the first week and Cling to are just as desperate for familiar people as you are, and in the long run, once you’re less frantic for human interaction, you’ll probably drift apart. I lucked out, and three of the people I met during orientation I still talk to, and that is at least in part because we all lived within a hundred feet of each other for two years. Your long-term friends will likely come from shared activities, majors, or living spaces, so don’t stress if you don’t feel like you ‘fit in’ in the first week.

With the above in mind, it follows that you should start to get involved in stuff on campus, to meet people who are interested in the same stuff as you. The thing to keep in mind is that college is different than high school when it comes to extracurriculars! In high school, a lot of people could be in six extracurriculars and sports at once, have a social life, and get good grades. That is not actually physically possible in college. Just because you’re ‘only’ taking 15 credits does NOT mean you’re going to have the loads of free time it looks like in your schedule. During your orientation, you’ll probably have the opportunity to go to a club fair or something similar, to see the opportunities for involvement on your campus. Sign up for anything that’s interesting, but I would recommend only actually attending meetings for two, or maybe three, at the most. You’ll find going to more meeting than that is going to burn you out quick, and then you’ll attend NO meetings, and then what’s the point.

If you’re even a little sporty, I would really recommend signing up for an intramural sport. Exercising in college is totally possible (it must be, the gym is always full at my school!), but I personally do not understand or possess the fortitude to convince myself to go use an elliptical for 45 minutes three times a week, much less have a daily workout routine. Joining an intramural is a good way to have a scheduled time to do exercise things with other people interested in the same exercise things, and disguise it with having fun.

Also, when you are at your dorm, leave the door open! That is how dorm friends are made. When you hear people talking in the hall, you can stick your head out and comment. Early in the semester, people will often just try to grab as many people as they can to go to an activity together, and they’ll ask anyone with an open door. Go with those people. Do NOT just sit in your room playing video games all the time, though - that is a good way to signal that you aren’t interested in talking. Instead, watch a good show on Netflix (I met my now-boyfriend after my best friend invaded his room because he was watching Archer with the door open). Or go be the person who wanders around to talk to people (I met most of my current best friends because they went door to door and introduced themselves).

Essentially, making friends involves two major things: being chill, and talking to people. If that sounds like a tall order, it’s okay! “Chill” is less of a mythical state of being and more of an awareness that people are Different from You and should not be stalked.

(Disclaimer: I mention the things here below because I have witnessed or been told personally about someone doing all of these things and they were extremely off-putting for everyone involved.)

Don’t blast music: I have very rarely felt as instant an enmity for someone like that which I feel for someone playing music at TOP VOLUME at 1 AM on a TUESDAY. If you’re living in an apartment or dorm, this is probably the number one most common way to annoy everyone on your floor and the floor above AND below you. You’re not showing that you’re cool and chill, you’re showing that you have an active disregard for anyone that has a job or an 8 am class the next day.

Don’t follow people! For what probably seems like a good reason to the kind of person to do this, sometimes a person will decide that someone else is their Best Friend, independently of that other person’s feelings or knowledge. The first person will then apparently decide that following the second person, or simply “randomly” showing up wherever they are, is the best way to make the second person realize that they are Best Friends. That is stalking, don’t do it. If you ever feel this urge, STOP, and consider either A: talking to the other person, or if you can’t do that for some reason then B: let the other person live their life without stalking them!

Again, I only included things that I have watched or been told about.

Don’t schedule your life around someone else’s: Don’t take classes just to have your free time line up with a friend or SO. Take classes because you want to take them, or because they are required for your major. If you and your friend can work together to schedule your free time to overlap, that’s great! But in this scenario, both you and your friend are aware that this is the point and both of you want to do the thing. It shouldn’t be a one-sided thing - that is either kinda creepy on your part, or a sign that your relationship is suuuuper one-sided.

Okay, now that potentially stalkery activities are out of the way, we can move into social skills!

Listen to what others have to say: People really, really like to talk about themselves. If you can be genuinely interested in people, you’ll have more friend than you know what to do with. Be an engaged listener - ask questions based off of something the other person said, interject your own observations to fuel their own point, stuff like that.

On the other hand, sometimes listening to what others have to say also includes stuff like acknowledging the other person’s boundaries, and following through with them. That can include not being touchy with someone, respecting their study time by leaving them alone during it, not talking to them about certain topics they find uncomfortable, et cetera.

Find a hobby that you can talk about: One of the easiest ways to make friends is by talking to them about a hobby you mutually enjoy. This can be video games, art, sports, politics (though that one can also make you enemies), and basically any other activity you enjoy. Having a hobby that others also care about is an automatic conversation starter, and a good way to bond with others.

Learn how to STOP talking about your hobbies: The thing is that a lot of people REALLY REALLY like their hobbies, to the point of those hobbies being their only conversational topic. While League of Legends or the care and keeping of aquatic snails is super interesting to you, there’s a good chance it is not as interesting to other people. A good rule of thumb is that if someone checks their phone, or starts staring off into the distance during the conversation, you should change the subject to something they might find more interesting.

Accept that sometimes people are busy, or just don’t want more friends: Not every person that you try to befriend is going to be friendly back. Sometimes personalities just don’t mesh. Other times the person may be an introvert who doesn’t feel the need to go through the process of friendship with a new person. Sometimes people are just mean. None of this is necessarily a reflection on you as a person. If you feel like there’s something about yourself that is making it difficult to make new friends, then I recommend asking a trusted friend or family member for an honest appraisal. However, 9 out of 10 times, you’re either just trying to befriend people who don’t have the time, or you aren’t letting friendship evolve naturally. Both of those can be fixed by just Chilling Out.

There are a ton of resource online for improving your interpersonal skills! Body-language videos, conversation scripts, and online forums for your hobbies are all ways to improve your interactions with others. Take some time, and it will come.

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