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#i appreciate the faith you have in me!! though!!
merbear25 · 24 hours
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Can you please do 20 with sanji????
Hey, hey! Thank you for sending in your request! I took a little bit of a different route with this compared to some of the other ones I've written, so I hope you like it 💜💜
Finding hope
CW: SFW, gn!reader, fluff, spoilers for Whole Cake Island, reader is a servant for the Vinsmoke family.
Serving the Vinsmokes was anything but pleasant. Their cruelty knew no bounds and staying out of their line of fire wasn't always possible. Having been born into the lower class, there was no chance of ridding yourself of your title. When gossip of the son who escaped his fate caught your attention, you wondered if the same could be possible for you.
Years passed and thoughts of what happened to that boy came and went until mentions of an arranged marriage surfaced. You eavesdropped on them bad mouthing the other member of the family who'd been forgotten about, or rather shoved aside, for the better half of a decade.
Such distasteful language being used on their own flesh and blood sickened you. Although you never met him, you were sure that if his cruel brothers and father hated him so much that Sanji was the nicest of the bunch.
In preperation for his arrival, you were ordered to tidy the room Sanji would be assigned and help tend the kitchen for when the courses were ready to send out. Even though such orders were mundane, you had to take them seriously―even the most minor slipup would result in severe punishments.
When you caught word that Sanji had arrived, you were admittedly curious to find out who he was, even if that meant watching from the sidelines.
Unfortunately for him, such a reunion was treated like a court order―having no say in his own future and imposed with physical force. You stood by idly as he was berated, knowing damn well that you had no ground to interfere. When the tussle between the ill-fated brother and his attackers reached its peak, Sanji stormed off in hopes of distancing himself in any way he could manage.
Trying to salvage the remainder of his dignity, he took his resurfacing trauma to his room and mulled over his future that'd been signed away.
Having witnessed that night's events play out, Sanji easily earned your respect, despite not knowing of him for that long. Though you were strangers to each other, you couldn't help wanting to go after him just to check in on him. There was an undeniable tie you felt to him: the both of you yearned to escape the confines of this wretched castle.
Knocking on his door, you nervously informed him of your presence, "Apologies for intruding, but I wanted to know if you were alright."
Cracking the door open, he was pleasantly surprised to be met with such a tender face. "I appreciate you checking on me, but I'm fine."
Hesitantly calling attention to his wounds, you offered to treat them.
Taking a moment to soak in your kindness, he granted you entry into his bedroom.
Getting a better look at him, his charm still shined from under those bruises. Caring to them with such warmth made his heart melt. He'd been searching for such gentleness since being roped back into this family.
The fluttering in your heart spiked when your gaze met his, suddenly yanking you back to reality―he was of higher status and you were still a lowly servant.
Barley supressing the heat prickling at your cheeks, you were quick to pardon yourself.
Having the realization that you longed for something more just as he did all those years ago, he sympathized with your situation. Placing his hands on yours, his gaze held onto yours with a mutual understanding.
"You don't have to be so... formal," a subtle smile appeared on his swollen face as he returned the comfort you'd given him.
Being given the chance to get to know each other proved to be one of the moments you would forever be most grateful for. When he promised to take you away from there, you put your full faith in him, trusting that he was a man of his word―and thankfully, he was.
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uncanny-tranny · 9 months
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Over the years, I've gotten a lot of cis people messaging me about how they should go about dating or courting somebody who's trans, and I always felt like my responses would almost... disappoint them because there isn't this magic secret to dating us.
Cis people, if you want to date us, just date us. We're human beings, we're not wild animals to tame! I promise you can have a healthy relationship with a trans person without needing to feel like the world will end if you mess up.
Trans people who date cis people often want to feel secure in your acceptance of them. You don't have to talk about our transness for hours on end to prove that you accept your loved one. You don't have to put on a display and cabaret about how Much You Accept Us. Just be a person around us, and let us be people, too!
I almost want to disappoint cis people by reminding them of this. Some of the best relationships I've had with cis people have been ones where my transness is acknowledged, sure, but it's acknowledged in the same way that my left-handedness is. It's not a joke to them, it isn't something to be horrified about, but it's also something that they don't objectify me for.
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svsss-fanon-exposed · 3 months
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All the hate you’re getting must be annoying. Just wanted to let you know that I really enjoy your blog, and I am certain others do as well!
To be honest it hasn't been that bad. Less hate really (and hardly anything on those lines that hasn't been a misunderstanding quickly cleared up) and more just... misinterpretation of my intentions or what I say sometimes, which is honestly half on me because I'm not always able to find the best words to convey my meaning, but still half on people for not reading and considering the psas and statements I've made.
So far, most people have actually been pretty chill!
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the-gayest-sky-kid · 6 months
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it’s so funny when you say things that i def would do to my blorbos but i can’t exactly relate because you are talking about dazai. Like i won’t judge your taste since it’s usually good but i think it’s fascinating that this cockroach of a man has captured your heart. I hope you get to stab him and patch him up later
.
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princekirijo · 10 months
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Thoughts on SEES's 1st tier personas? You can keep this short if you want, and don't forget Psyche!
WOOHOO Prince rants about personas round 2 electric boogaloo!
OK this time I'll focus a little more on the actual designs themselves and my thoughts on how they relate to the character + their stories. Read more because well... You know me...
MC/FeMC: So for Orpheus I think its a pretty fitting choice for the protagonists. The protagonists are on a Journey just like Orpheus journey out of the underworld (kinda on the nose lmao) and both of them have strong connections with music! There's probably some connection between the underworld journey and the fact the plot of the game is to stop death but I'm not sure how to word it if you get me. I also like how they really resemble the protagonists face and hair wise! The mechanical detailing is also a neat touch, I've always seen it as the protagonists being very closed off with their emotions (that's kinda of a trend with a lot of the P3 cast I feel, the inital personas are very stiff but then the 2nd tier have more human feel to them).
Junpei: I think Hermes is a really good choice for Junpei. They're both kinda tricksters and Hermes is often portrayed as being carefree (in media at least) which suits Junpei a lot. In terms of design I think its pretty good, I really like the over exaggerated wings on his feet (the iconic winged sandals Hermes usually rocks) and I like his helmet design. My favorite thing about him as I mentioned before though is actually his animations. The way he slides into the enemies reminds me of a baseball player sliding to a base when they're running between bases (Idk baseball that well I hope that makes sense). Very fitting for Junpei considering his choice of career in Arena and also how he uses his sword like a baseball bat!
Yukari: Io is an interesting one for me. I really like her design, I think the girl in the cow head is a very fitting look for Io (who was a woman who got transformed into a cow by Zeus. Io's story is very sad imo (classic Greek woman gets screwed over by Zeus story) but I'll be honest I've never been totally sure why they went with her for Yukari. I think it works don't get me wrong and I like the choice I just don't see why (I, as I'm sure you can tell, am very passionate about Persona designs and I do my best to understand the choices behind the character and design of the persona and how it relates to the user). It just got pointed out to me (shout out to you Rui) that the way the woman is chained to the cow is kinda symbolic of how Yukari is chained to her past and I think that's a really really cool detail!
Akihiko & Shinjiro: I have to combine these two for obvious reasons. Polydueces ugly design aside for a moment, man. This choice for Akihiko is so good because of its connection to Castor. Regardless of how you view Akihiko and Shinjiro's connection, the way they are so connected to each other and how interwoven they are as characters to the point their personas are literally twins?!! Absolutely amazing I don't think we've had as powerful a persona connection since. I really love how their designs reflect each other two, Polydueces with its lighter and more alive design versus Castor and his dark look and the sword that's embedded in his chest? Symbolizing that he's the mortal twin that dies in the legends? And then connect that with his story in the game? Blows my MIND conceptually the best personas in the series actually. I love them.
Fuuka: OK I love Lucia and how she interacts with Fuuka. Having that glass orb as her body and have Fuuka in there navigating for the team is really really cool! I really like the pose of the persona (there is something about it... blanking on why that is relevant to its design). I also love the detail of her eyes being covered as she is the Patron saint of the blind! A cool choice for a navigational persona. Something about her being considered a martyr is fitting for Fuuka too. I also like how different it is to the others (a lot of the others having Greek connections whereas this is a Catholic saint).
Mitsuru: Oh Penthesilea my absolute beloved. I've discussed her in detail before (mind you probably two years ago at this point) but like one of my favorite things about her is the weapons she uses. The sword, particularly a rapier is seen as an honest weapon. A good knight has a sword, a skilled duelist has a rapier. Mitsuru is a very strong and experienced Persona user (and ofc is a fencer herself). She's convinced everyone she's on this noble quest to fix the Kirijo Group's mistakes, which is partially true to be fair. But her other weapon? A dagger. Associated with dishonesty and treachery. I feel like this alludes to her being dishonest with SEES. I adore Mitsuru but even I can admit she was sneaky and kept important details from SEES (she had her reasons but still). And ofc the treachery I feel is less her and more Ikutski betraying her trust and her father's trust. Also her being dishonest about her own motivations! And then ofc the big details: the absence of red in Penthesilia's design and her face being fully covered by the mask! Showing the walls Mitsuru has built up around herself!!! Sorry I just love Penthesilia and will over analyze her a lot.
Koromaru: Honestly I don't have much to say here but that's not a bad thing! Cereberus is really true to the original myths, a three headed dog with a hellish looking design and that's what they've given us. It's a solid design and I love him!
Ken: OK my own thoughts about Nemesis aside, I think its a really well executed design. It's a very unnerving and angry looking design, perfect for the goddess of revenge. And obvs her being a goddess of revenge is very very suitable for Ken given his motivations up until October 4th! The color scheme really helps with this too. Just a very edgy design perfect for Ken.
Aigis: Palladion is really cool because it's not actually a person but rather an object! Specifically an object associated with protection very similar to aegis. Which well, is perfect for Aigis. A robot dedicated to protecting the protagonist. I can't quite put it into words but its just a really really cool design. I like the big metal spike going through it, very robotic and always reminds me of the front of a pirate ship, not sure if that was intentional tbh.
Metis: OK Psyche is tricky for me. As a design its really cool. I enjoy the butterfly motif a lot. I really like its dress too and I think it resembles Athena which makes a lot of sense given who Metis is! Why Psyche though? The only connection I can make is that Psyche was originally a mortal who was considered so beautiful people mistook her for Aphrodite. Which I guess ties into how Metis was mistaken for Aigis..? Idk there's def a connection here somewhere but I am not sure of what that is. It's still a cool design though.
And I think that's everyone? Hope I didn't forget anyone man this was fun to do. Congrats if you read it all LMAO
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if you hate him we can’t be friends 💔
#this is how I cope with seeing people who are Inherently Wrong™️ in the main tags btw#he’s just a guy……..his heart is so full and he loves so thoroughly#he adopts an emo and a feral goth and helps them to appreciate life again what more do you WANT FROM HIM#obviously he has flaws but every dr character does??#and frankly aside from the translation issues I find that his flaws are handled in one of the most narratively satisfying ways#and I definitely feel as though a lot his actions and behaviors that people point to as reasons for disliking him are simply taken out of#context#he’s a character who was facing death before the killing game ever even started -#YES he’s intense but that’s because he has to be. he’s trying to do as much as he can within a limited timeframe#AS A TEENAGER NO LESS#Y’ALL SEEM TO LIKE TO FORGET THAT PART TOO…..GUY’S IN HIGH SCHOOL 😭#and anyway when push comes to shove he sets aside his grudges to try and do the right thing for the people he cares about#it’s. sigh. I think about the hangar scene SO MUCH.#like he really doesn’t let Shuichi apologize because he knows that Shuichi shouldn’t HAVE to#ALSO??? he’s not BEING AN ASSHOLE in chapter 4 HE’S JUST SEEING THE AFTERMATH OF SOMEONE HAVING BEEN HORRIBLY MANIPULATED INTO DOING#SOMETHING THEY WOULD NEVER OTHERWISE DO#he puts so much faith and trust in his friends because he KNOWS that fundamentally they are good people#he’s not even!!!!! directly an asshole to Kokichi until Kokichi starts treating the losses and trauma they’ve all suffered as trivial!!!#oh and don’t even come at me with the ‘’hypocrisy’’ shit#the dude’s body is fucking SHUTTING DOWN I can forgive him for not doing a couple pushups 😭#cries and sobs I love him so much. he tries so hard to be positive and make the most of things#y’all just jealous 🤧#danganronpa#kaito momota#ndrv3#new danganronpa v3#killing harmony#new danganronpa v3 killing harmony
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angelfrommontgomery · 9 months
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I actually for real like being single right now. I used to want what my sister has (met the love of her life at 15, no drama, great person), but the closer I get to moving and the more I start deciding what my life is going to look like in a new city it’s like. Thank god I get to build a life centered around my needs my desires and I’m surrounded by people who support that. Not that I’d get into a relationship where I had to stifle myself or my desires, but a partnership would be a different experience even if it was a great one. It’s fun to be 22 and have every possibility wide open. I wouldn’t want my life any other way than it is right now
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Finished the Pride and Prejudice book and 2005 movie and I gotta say I liked the movie way better
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kajiimotojiiro · 2 years
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Ugh
#im going to ramble in these tags for a bit so that the potentially triggering tags#are located way way way down and no one will look at them i just#so uh yeah hows the weather anyone else having insane sinus drainage#i actually had a patient call me today worried because her nose was running and her head hurt and im like#well if it isnt getting worse and its only been a few days and you have no other symptoms you probs have sinus issues like everyone else#in this state but if youre super worried and antihistamines dont help please contact your doctor i appreciate your faith in a pharmacist#being able to diagnose over the phone but i actually legally cannot do that#are these tags long enough yet#possibly but who knows anyway if youre here uhhh tw animal death ahead#im a petsitter and have been for like. 10 years now and i share sits with my mom sometimes bc i work full time and cant always get there#anyway at one of our shared sits today she went in and one of the little cats was just#suddenly dead. like she wasnt that old and yet she was just. stiff and gone and we're both just so fucked up over it#like i wish there had been some sign and we could have saved her even though it was likely an unfixable heart defect#and her people apparently had taken her to the vet LAST WEEK and didnt bother to tell us that she seemed to be feeling poorly last week#and theyre just like oh we'll get a new cat when we come back#meanwhile my ocd has been going insane since then bc i have really bad intrusive thoughts centering on keeping my cats alive#like half of my rituals are specifically for my cats#and i just keep think about poor sammie dying alone and scared bc we werent there with her and her people had been gone since friday#and it just makes me so fucking sad my heart is breaking but i cant stop thinking about it and no distractions are working#rip sammie you were such a sweet little cat and im so sorry you had to go alone and scared
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heich0e · 2 years
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Liv are you good at responding to text messages? You give me quick text back vibes
it really depends on the day (and the person lol) but no actually hahahhaah
i at any given moment have at least 3 unanswered texts (though i usually clear out the notifs as soon as they come in). I'm also bad at letting my phone go dead, and sometimes i drop off the face of the earth for a bit and don't reply to anything. one time my friend found my new apartment based only on very vague descriptions i'd given her in passing and she texted me "hey come to your living room window for a second" and i did and she was parked outside. she literally just drove by on her way to work to make sure i was still livin'. she waved n drove away LMAOOOOO.
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snekdood · 10 months
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idc how u feel about me u should at least appreciate the fact that everything im doing in regards to comic is all from ME. i don’t have anyone here working on this with me. which is why it takes so, so long sddfsvghdfhgv
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weed-cat · 11 months
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hi! hello! hi! idk if i have told you before but you are literally just so os nice and considerate and i appreciate you so much! also based as fuck, i love reading through your posts, i usually refrain from adding ob things or whatver bc i am white and european so i don't want to stick my opiniond on your stuff but i always read through them!
anyway, i hope you're having a great day or night or morning or whatever time it is for you<33
emmi that is so so kind of you. secretly I'm actually a huge bitch but I'm only allowed to be bitchy sometimes as a treat. it's so easy to be nice to you actually you are so chill and funny and epic and friendly and you don't make kind interactions difficult at all.
also you are 300% still allowed to have thoughts and opinions near me I prommy. you may be white and european but you're a person with perspectives and experiences that are just as real as anyone else's. like just don't be combative with or try to talk over poc about poc topics and you're literally fine. you have a limited perspective on certain issues but so does literally everyone else on earth. tbh within any axis of privilege/oppression, the culture of Any Person With Privilege I Don't Have Is Inherently Actively Oppressing Me And Needs To Shut Up Forever can be cathartic for disadvantaged people but ultimately leads to a lot of social regression in the long run. unpacking and disassembling systems of oppression can only be effectively accomplished as a dialogue, not a TED Talk.
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apollos-olives · 3 months
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hey! if you don't mind me asking(feel free to ignore this ask) what do actual palestinians think of hamas? I'm not asking to sow any discord or to "catch" you out, I'm asking purely out of curiosity. from where I'm from, people generally view hamas and the houthis positively (and by people i mean the vast Muslim majority of pro-palestine supporters) but i have seen than some Palestinians don't hold them in such a high regard. similarly some people supported the IRA whereas other irish people strongly were against them - so I'm wondering if this is a similar situation? again if this ask is uncomfortable for you to answer , don't feel obligated to
this ask is uncomfortable but i'll still answer because i think it's important.
we as palestinians are sick of getting asked about this. it's asked as though every palestinian somehow has the same opinion on hamas and that each singular palestinian can speak for the rest of the population, which is obviously not true. i don't know every palestinians' opinion on hamas and i cannot list every opinion out there because not all of us agree on one single thing. each palestinian has their own opinion on hamas and honestly, it doesn't matter. we are tired of this question. we don't care about hamas anymore. this shit isn't about hamas at this point. 30000+ palestinians are dead and people are STILL talking about hamas as if that's actually important and rather than protesting for a ceasefire or fighting for a free palestine.
my opinion on hamas is different than my friends' opinions on hamas. my opinion on hamas is different than my parents' opinion on hamas. my opinion on hamas is different than my palestinian mutuals' opinion on hamas. my opinion on hamas is different than a lot of other palestinians who are involved. palestinians who keep getting asked this are tired. we are so tired. i appreciate that you are asking in good faith, but we don't want to talk about hamas anymore. we want to have a free palestine. we want our children to stop dying. we want to return to our land.
my personal opinion is that i don't really care about them. i don't care for their policies or their political goals. i only support them because they are one of the largest and efficient groups who are trying to liberate palestine. many palestinians share this same opinion. they do not support hamas as a whole, but they still appreciate that hamas is trying to fight for a liberated palestine. we support their efforts for the fight against the occupation, but past that we do not care or do not support them outside of that. what they do as a political group isn't something that i'm interested in, because i'd much rather be focused on freeing and rebuilding palestine.
some palestinians hate hamas. my parents dislike them, but they won't criticize them for trying to fight against the occupation, because they know that hamas is one of the most powerful groups of resistance in palestine, and will not go against their efforts to try to help palestine. some palestinians love hamas. some palestinians don't care about hamas. every palestinian is different, but in the end it doesn't matter. hamas is fighting for the same goal as the rest of us. a free palestine.
@el-shab-hussein has a post on his own opinion on hamas that i think is worth the read.
in the end, it doesn't matter about what our opinions on hamas are. because hamas only exists because of israel. if israel didn't exist, hamas wouldn't exist. hamas is a large group working for the resistance and hamas isn't the reason of palestinians' suffering. israel is.
@fairuzfan says: "I know this was sent in good faith but it doesn't really matter what Palestinians opinions on hamas are because even before hamas existed 750,000 Palestinians were exiled and killed."
we suffered before hamas existed and we will continue to suffer as long as israel is in power. so again, it doesn't matter what palestinians' - or really anyone's - opinion is on hamas. what we should be focusing on is fighting for a ceasefire, fighting for a free palestine, and fighting for a free world.
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valeskafics · 15 days
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"Unholy Matrimony" - Maegor Targaryen x Niece!Reader
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a/n: first time writing for big tiddy daddy, dedicated to my loves @fairysluna and @targaryen-dynasty the maegor queens hehe. and shout out to @rafeism for helping me come up with the title bc my brain is not working today 🤭🩷
Summary: Your mother gives you a task to carry out on your wedding night. One that you are unsure you can complete.
TW: canon typical incest, profanity, innuendo, she/her pronouns, afab reader, dubcon, maegor is a tw in and of himself, size kink, breeding kink, overstim, creampie, choking, fingering, tummy bulge, rough sex, slight degradation, loss of virginity, threats of violence
Word Count: 3,325 words
Rating: 18+, MDNI
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Fire and Blood/A Song of Ice and Fire characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them.
Comments, likes, and reblogs are never required but are immensely appreciated 🩷
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Perhaps it was wrong to gloat at her victory over Rhaenys after her sister perished, but Visenya cared not. Rhaenys’ son was a sickly little creature, who was once again reduced to crawling and wailing like a babe upon hearing of his mother’s death. Maegor had no such troubles. He was a strong, healthy boy, nearly twice as big as Aenys was when he was born. And just over ten years later, she had secured yet another victory over her sister. 
You. Aenys and Alyssa’s first child, Aegon’s first grandchild. A cherubic little creature with plump cheeks, bright eyes, and a cheerful smile, often accompanied by your melodic laughter, one who charmed everyone she met. 
At first, Visenya thought your birth represented a problem. After all, where would Maegor fall in the line of succession now? However, a solution soon presented itself. Though Aegon seemed in favor of the idea, Aenys and Alyssa refused to betroth their infant child to a boy who was quickly coming to be infamous in his own right. Furthermore, while the Faith had allowed for Aegon and his sisters to be wed, it was an exception and not the rule. The High Septon reprimanded the queen for even suggesting such a thing and sooner than late, Maegor’s betrothal to Lady Ceryse Hightower was secured. He was married to her a mere two years later, and you? You were nothing but a distant memory. A babe he and his mother had come to see when she was born.
It was not until his father’s death that he saw you again, when his brother was crowned king. You were a young woman of eight and ten now, with that same bright smile you had as a young girl. Maegor was not a man to be taken in easily by a woman, but he could not help comparing you to his lady wife, resenting the poor Hightower woman more and more every time he saw her. She had not yet given him an heir, something that had made his position vulnerable. After all, Aenys had several children while he had no progeny to speak of. Seeing this change in Maegor, Visenya conspired with some of Aenys’ advisors to have Maegor’s marriage to Lady Ceryse annulled. Though the High Septon was angry at this, there was precious little he could do, since as far as the world was concerned, his young niece was barren.
Chosen to serve as your father’s Hand, Maegor remained in King’s Landing, learning more about you with every passing day. Everywhere you went, you could feel his eyes on you, piercing, staring right through you. And his mother encouraged this. Visenya could sense trouble brewing should her and Rhaenys’ factions not be joined, her sister still haunting her from beyond the grave. So, despite the initial refusal, she began whispering in her nephew’s ear, planting the seeds of doubt about wedding you to your younger brother, Aegon. After all, an uncle and a niece would be far less blasphemous in the eyes of the Faith, would it not? Maegor’s kinship to you was far more removed than that of your little brother.
And so, her plan starts to come together. Subtly, your father pushes you to spend more time with Maegor, having implicit trust in him as his brother and hand. Your mother, however, remains resistant to the idea, thinking a match with your brother to be far more suitable. In the end, however, the king reminds her that it will be your decision whom you wed. And so, he allows you to continue meeting suitors, allowing you to entertain their fancies and amuse yourself.
Maegor, however? He has no intention of allowing this mummer’s farce to continue. He corners you after one such meeting, his hulking frame dwarfing yours as he glared down at you. Not one to cow down to intimidation, you merely raise your chin in defiance and meet his gaze.
“Yes, kepus?” (uncle)
His stare would be enough to chill the heart of even the bravest of men, but you steel yourself. It is not men’s blood that runs through you, but the blood of Old Valyria. The blood of the dragon. And dragons do not fear other dragons.
His voice is low, a threatening rumble as he speaks, “You’re to stop this foolishness and tell your father that you acquiesce to our betrothal.”
If you were anyone else, the way you blatantly laugh in his face would be enough to lop your head off, send it rolling to the ground, but he reigns in his temper as you respond, “Whatever would I do that for? I am quite enjoying having so many vying for my attention.”
He grits his teeth, his jaw clenching with annoyance, “You are mine, lēkianna. I want you to be perfectly clear on that. No man is to touch you save for me. By law, my right as a son of Aegon, I may lay claim to you, little one.” (niece)
You scoff slightly, “I am not some object for you to claim, kepus.”
Maegor grabs your wrist as you move to leave, tugging you back against his chest, holding it tightly, smirking to himself as you try to pull away, “No. You are no object. This much is true. But you are indeed mine. And it is high time you started acting as such.”
His stare is heated as he glares down at you, but you continue to stand your ground. He wonders if this is foolishness or bravery on your part. Perhaps a bit of both. He chuckles almost mockingly when your father calls out for you from the courtyard, pulling you even closer, whispering in your ear.
“Run now, little one. It would be unfortunate if we were to be caught in such a compromising position. One might think your virtue had been sullied with the way you’re looking at me.”
You scowl, rubbing your wrist and shooting him a dirty look before going on your way. You hate to admit it, but there is something about your uncle that intrigues you. It has ever since he returned to King’s Landing. His hungry, greedy gaze on your body makes you feel more desired than you have by any man. And gods… The idea of him just tossing you over his shoulder and dragging you away to claim you… You would never admit it, not even to your closest friends, but the thought has kept you up on many a night, your fingers working you to your climax as you imagine how incredible his would feel in their place.
Tonight is no different, as you lay in your bed. You know he isn’t the best of men, not even close. He is known for his cruelty, his lack of respect for life. And yet you cannot help but want him anyway. You curve your fingers, imagining his long, thick digits being able to reach the places that you cannot, your eyes rolling back as your other hand squeezes at your breasts, hips bucking up as you chase your peak.
And you are well aware that he’s watching you through the crack you’ve left open in the door. You always know when he is watching you. And you do not mind it. You can hear the low grunts he lets out as he tugs at his cock, your mouth watering at the idea of feeling him inside you. You know the man could very likely tear you to shreds if he wanted, but you doubt that. You are quite sure that he wants this as much as you do, if not more. Your teeth sink into your bottom lip as you moan out the one word that has him spilling himself into his palm.
Kepus.
When you give your consent for being betrothed to Maegor the following day, Visenya and your father are both pleased, while your mother grants her blessing with much trepidation. Maegor, however, simply stares you down, that look in his eyes making your stomach twist with anticipation of what awaits you on your wedding night. Your eyes travel downward, toward where you can just see the bulge of his cock against his trousers. When you catch yourself, you avert your gaze, knowing that if your mother or your septa realize what it is that you were staring at, you’ll surely be caned. However, when you meet Maegor’s gaze again, you know he saw.
Maegor liked the fact that you were looking.
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Your mother takes you aside on the eve of your wedding, pulling you away from your great aunt who is busy telling you all sorts of things on what it means to be a wife and a queen. At first, you’re confused as to why your mother wishes to speak to you in private, but when she places your grandfather’s dagger in your hand, stolen from your father, you understand. Your eyes go wide as she tells you a man like Maegor will make a most frightful husband. That you must stop this, request him to forego a bedding ceremony and strike while he is asleep your first night together. You look at her, shocked and confused, wondering why she would have you do this.
And she tells you of a dream your grandfather once had. A dream which spoke of a fate almost too terrible to repeat. That Maegor would be the one to bring this about with his cruelty, his bloodlust, his thirst for power. Your grandfather had brushed it off, stating it was not one of his dragon dreams, but your mother was not as easily convinced. Your mother is determined to have you end Maegor’s reign before it begins, her eyes pleading as she places the blade in your hands.
As you stand in the sept, saying the words that are meant to bind you to your uncle forever, you glance at the faces of your family rather than focusing on him. Your father beams proudly, having stated that you are the most beautiful bride the Seven Kingdoms have ever seen. Aegon looks saddened, though you do your best to ignore it, your heart twisting painfully in your chest. Visenya looks rather smug, satisfied at her plan finally having come to fruition. And your mother… She looks weary. Fearful. You finally meet Maegor’s gaze, finding it already locked on you as he wraps his cloak around your shoulders. And then? He pulls you into a hungry kiss, one far too intense for the septon’s taste, who covers his mouth in shock. One of Maegor’s large hands grips your waist, the other twisting in your hair as his mouth devours yours.
He ignores the protests of all those present when he heaves you over his shoulder, landing a firm slap on your rear with his hand making you let out a yelp as he stalks off toward your marriage bed. Reception be damned, it would appear your newlywed husband wishes to have you right now. You probably would not have been surprised if he went so far as to claim you in front of the septon himself, blasphemer that he is. You glance up from your vantage point, dangling over his shoulder, your mother’s worried gaze being the last thing you see before you exit the sept, heading toward the manse you two will live in until such time you take the throne.
The walk feels longer than normal though it is not particularly arduous. The silence is deafening as Maegor weaves his way through the streets, the cheers of the smallfolk ringing in your ears even from so far away, celebrating the royal wedding, the union of the two factions of House Targaryen.
Maegor tosses you onto the bed, rather unceremoniously, chuckling darkly to himself at the annoyed noise you let out when you fall. You glower up at him for a moment, though soon, your look of anger fades into one of surprise, watching as he disrobes in front of you. His body is all muscle, a broad chest and equally broad shoulders, gods even his thighs are muscular. And when he removes the last of his clothing, your eyes flit to his cock. It’s so long and thick that part of you wonders how he will even fit. His length sways slightly as he moves toward you, hard and heavy as he strokes it slowly, evidence of his arousal weeping from the tip.
He moves to the bed, crawling over you, his hands ripping your bodice in half, tossing it aside and leaving you in only your shift. His muscles flex with the action and your breath catches in your throat as he yanks the shift off of you as well. Without even thinking, though you are not ashamed of your body, you move to press your thighs together, feeling exposed and vulnerable, your arm covering your chest. But Maegor grabs both your wrists, pinning them over your head easily with one hand, nudging your thighs apart with his knee.
“Why so shy, little one?” He murmurs, his voice a low rumble in his chest as he stares at you hungrily, gaze fixed on the apex between your thighs, “You were so wanton making those noises as you fucked yourself with my fingers, the other night, crying my name. We both know this is exactly what you want. There is no point in thinking otherwise.”
You watch as he moves to cup your mound with his free hand, his fingers ghosting against your cunny. Your back arches off the bed as he slowly pushes one finger inside you, so long and thick that you can hardly imagine what his cock will feel like. Maegor’s smile is as dark as his gaze as he works his finger inside of you, feeling you squeezing around him, your body squirming but unable to escape his grasp. He adds a second, making you whine as he begins moving the digits faster and faster, the heel of his palm pressed against your pearl as he fucks you with his fingers. And finally, he adds a third, making the stretch almost uncomfortable. You reach your peak, your toes curling as you cry out his name, but Maegor is nowhere near finished. Rather than grant you any reprieve, he moves his fingers even faster, chuckling to himself at the way you moan unintelligibly, the wet squelching sounds coming from you spurring him on.
“Such a tight little cunt you have,” he says, almost mockingly, his thumb pressing against your pearl as he brings you to your peak once more, “But don’t worry, little one. I’ll make it fit.”
His words are equal parts threat and promise as he moves his fingers, curling them inside of you as they brush against that sweet spot that you are never quite able to reach. You feel your third climax approaching, panicking slightly at the way your body heats, the way you feel like you have lost complete control of yourself as he fucks you with his fingers. Maegor towers over you, his form menacing yet so very arousing as you scream his name, reaching your peak yet again, your arousal coming out in spurts against his fingers, leaving the sheets beneath you soaked with the evidence of your climax. You look at him, surprised. You have heard of such an intense peak happening from your ladies in waiting but have never experienced such a thing yourself. And Maegor? He just gives you a smug smirk, grabbing the base of his cock, slapping the tip against your pearl.
He watches as you jerk away slightly, your breasts bouncing as you move, legs trying to close yet again. Maegor lets go of your wrists to shove your knees apart, dragging you closer to him, manhandling you so that your body beneath him, legs spread. He enters you, every inch of his thick, veiny length making you whimper pathetically as he fills you. Maegor lets out a low hiss at how tight you feel around him, how tiny you are as he fills you. He watches as your eyes roll back, your jaw slackening as he buries himself inside you. He hooks your legs around his hips, splitting you open on his cock as he begins to rut against you at a breakneck, almost violent pace.
Your lips twist in a silent scream of pleasure, one of Maegor’s hands holding you in place by your hips while the other squeezes at one of your breasts, so harshly that it has even him moaning as he snarls, “You are going to give me the heir my last wife never could. You were born to be mine, you know that? Born to be my queen, to bear my heirs.” His words barely even register, the feeling of him moving in and out of you, filling you so perfectly, the fat head of his cock hitting your sweet spot with every thrust rendering you speechless. But he lets go of your breast to grab your throat, squeezing hard enough that your vision begins to blur, “Answer me, lēkianna. Say you were made for me.”
“Yes, kepus,” you manage to rasp as he continues pounding into you, “I was made for you.”
Maegor glances downward and sees the way his cock pushes against your stomach, the bulge visible against your skin every time he thrusts. He presses down on it, the sensation making you let out a squeal as he fucks into you even harder, deeper.
“I won’t let you leave this bed until I am certain you’re with child,” he snarls, “So you had best prepare for me to fuck you until this sweet little cunny is sore and you are unable to walk, my seed running down your thighs, because your cunt can’t take anymore, little one.”
With a few more thrusts, you reach your peak, one, two more later, and he spills himself inside you, thick hot white ropes of his spend filling you, the sensation being oddly pleasurable in a way you did not realize was possible. You lay there, doing your best to catch your breath, feeling him crush you against his chest, arms wrapped around you in an embrace that feels almost suffocating.
“Rest for now. When I wake, I will have you once more.”
You wait for him to fall asleep, squirming out of his arms, and reaching for your discarded clothes, or more specifically, the knife that lies in your cloak. Your footsteps are silent, moving to grab the blade, feeling its balance in your hand. It is almost like you were meant to hold it. Your husband lays on his back, the steady rise and fall of his chest lulling you into a sense of security, that he is asleep and does not know what it is that you are plotting.
Still bare as the day you came into this world, you walk toward your husband, moving to straddle his hips, raising your blade above your head, poising to strike. For a moment, a brief, fleeting moment…
You hesitate.
Maegor looks so different asleep. Less like the monster people claim him to be and more like a man. And you find yourself unable to do it. Unable to complete the task your mother gave you. The blade falls from your grip, clattering to the ground. You panic for a moment, but your husband remains asleep, pulling you back into his bear-like grip, holding you close to him.
As slumber slowly begins to claim you, you let out a quiet sigh, and close your eyes.
It is only then that Maegor opens his own, admiring you for a brief moment. His pretty little wife. His queen.
He is quite glad that you chose not to go forward with your mother’s plan. It would have been a shame to have to kill you. He quite likes you, after all.
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buckymorelikefuckme · 13 days
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and baby makes three
(the reboot)
bucky barnes x fem reader
words: 11.3k
warnings: **18+ ONLY** friends to lovers, pining, smut, oral (f receiving), breeding kink, pregnancy kink, cockwarming (kind of??), trigger warning for having troubles with getting pregnant. it's still super fuckin soft despite all of that though, i swear.
a/n: okay so it's currently 6am as i'm typing this and i haven't been to sleep yet bc i decided to just heavily edit this instead of rewrite it bc i'm lazy i guess idk. this was posted originally back in 2021 i believe and it's still on ao3 it's just orphaned rip. i promise i'll be writing and posting new stuff soon ok pls have faith in me and cheer me on bc it's hard and scary and i don't wanna disappoint anybody :( ANYWAY, as usual, any and all mistakes are my own. if i've missed anything important pls let me know so i can correct it. feedback is encouraged (pls) and appreciated (i am begging...)
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The idea of you having a child one day always seemed foreign and very unlikely. Sure, you liked kids well enough, but having one of your own…
It’s a thought that’s sat in a corner deep in your mind, buried beneath a million other impossible concepts; a thought that you’ve only ever glanced over and never gave your full attention, having ruled it out ages ago as something you just couldn’t—or wouldn’t—do.
And then, on a day like any other, it pushes its way to the forefront of your mind, making itself known and unwilling to leave.
You’re going into the clothing store to find a new cardigan after your most favorite one got eaten by the dryer. Usually you’re a single-minded shopper, walking into a store with tunnel vision and on a mission to get what you need and that’s it.
Today, however, you make the mistake of letting your eyes wander on your way to the sweater section. Your gaze just so happens to land on the baby clothes… and your steps falter. It’s there that you see it, a tiny, pink onesie with a sleeping teddy bear printed on the front, displayed on an even tinier hanger. There’s matching pants with teddy bears all over them and ruffles on the butt and all your brain can muster up is cutecutecutecutecute.
Your feet carry you closer and before you realize what you’re doing you pick up the outfit, letting out a coo when you realize the teddy bear is fuzzy, softly rubbing your thumb across it. Somehow, you walk out of the store, not with a new cardigan, but with the cute baby outfit and a bow you thought looked adorable with it.
It’s not until you get home that it hits you, that you bought baby clothes for a baby you don’t even have.
The feeling that rushes through you is hard to describe. Shame? Embarrassment?
...Yearning?
No. Definitely not. Nope.
There’s absolutely no yearning going on here, not for a baby. You’ve never even had that desire before and you certainly don’t see yourself having it now. You shake your head to clear it, telling yourself you’ll take it back tomorrow.
Except you don’t take it back. You conveniently “forget” and it stays shoved on the top shelf in your hall closet. You pretend you don’t pause in front of said closet throughout the following days—weeks—chewing on the inside of your cheek and staring at the door like you can see through the wood at the evidence of your impulsive purchase.
It gets harder to ignore, though, when you start getting ads for baby clothing brands. And baby toys, bottles, handy little gadgets for new parents, nursery decor… It’s endless.
Then, as if it wasn’t already bad enough, all of your childhood friends start popping out babies like it’s a brand new trend. You don't think you've seen your social media this flooded with pregnancy announcements and baby arrivals, ever. Your emotions are mixed; happy for them, and for their excitement, but there’s also a weird discomfort settled in your stomach.
You hesitate to be that person who thinks the universe is trying to tell you something, but you do wonder. Why else would you suddenly have these feelings? Why else would there be baby stuff everywhere you look now?
It brings on other thoughts, as well. In this day and age, it’s not too unusual for women to have babies without being married, or without a significant other at all. There is the pressure, still, to at least be in a relationship, but considering you’ve been practically in love with one of your closest friends for the last two years, it’s safe to say that you’re tragically single, so having a baby with someone is out of the question.
And god, do you even want a baby?
As soon as the thought crosses your mind, with a sudden clarity that hits you like a ton of bricks, you realize you do. It feels like a freight train has slammed into you. Your mind’s eye supplies you with images of a swollen belly and wide smile, a precious baby wrapped in a soft blanket, cradled in your arms, a gummy grin and happy giggle.
Emotion consumes you then, longing like you’ve never felt in your life, chest aching with how badly you want that.
It’s not as if you’re too young. You’re plenty old enough and you’ve got a secure job. You don’t subscribe to that whole biological clock nonsense, but you do feel that if you are going to potentially have a baby, it might be better to do it now while you’re still in relatively good health.
You groan, dropping your face into your open palms, the movie you'd been watching to try and distract yourself long forgotten as it continues to play on the television.
This is a lot to think about, you ponder to yourself. Taking a deep breath in and releasing it slowly, you decide the mature thing to do is give yourself more time to ruminate on it. Having a baby is no small decision. You need to be absolutely certain it’s what you want. It’s going to change your entire life, everything, and you’d be responsible for a new life. So, you’ll have to give yourself a few months to decide and then you can go from there.
***
You’re scrolling through yet another article on your laptop, engrossed in every detail of the process of artificial insemination and the symptoms and side effects that come with it. So engrossed, in fact, that you don’t hear the key turning in the lock, the door opening and closing, and the heavy footfalls that follow.
It’s only when Bucky asks, “Whatcha reading?” that you are even aware of his presence.
You startle so hard that your knee slams into the underside of your table. Ignoring the throbbing pain in your knee and your wildly beating heart, you close your laptop with a snap and turn to Bucky.
“You could knock,” you grouse.
“Why give me a key, then?” he retorts, unapologetic.
You roll your eyes and grumble under your breath, “Clearly, it was a mistake.”
“You didn’t answer me.”
Brows furrowed, you ask, “What?”
He gestures to your laptop. “What were you reading? Your nose was nearly smushed against the screen.”
You blink, trying to think of a reasonable excuse and coming up empty.
“Nothing,” is all your brilliant mind can supply.
Bucky’s eyes narrow for a few seconds, and you pray to every higher power and all that is holy and good that he won’t press further. You remain frozen under Bucky’s suspicious stare, hearing that Old West shootout music playing in your mind.
Thankfully, it seems the deities are feeling indulgent, as Bucky chooses let it go.
He holds up the bags he carried in. “I brought lunch.”
You perk up instantly. “Did you go to that one place—?”
“With the fried rice you like so much, yes,” he finishes for you, smiling.
“You’re the best,” you sigh, stomach rumbling eagerly.
“I know,” he replies, solemn and dramatic like the idiot he is.
He begins taking out the styrofoam boxes and chattering on about something dumb Steve did the other day, and you mean to listen, you really do. It’s just. That article is still lingering in your brain. There’s so many steps and hassles. Plus, it’s not cheap. It would be a hefty investment.
You’d only researched it because, after months of contemplating the pros and cons of having a baby, you determined the pros far outweigh the cons. But then the problem was: how to even make it happen.
Your first thought was that you didn’t think you’d let just any man come inside you, for many obvious reasons. You’d shuddered to think of it. Then there was surrogacy, which is admirable and wonderful, but you’d quickly dismissed that idea as you realized you wanted to actually carry the baby yourself. So that led you to artificial insemination. You weren’t sure how you felt about it yet. There was something a little too clinical about choosing a random man’s sperm to have injected into your uterus.
Bucky’s still speaking as he grabs plates and forks, unaware of your inner monologue. “And then he got Sam involved,” he’s saying, scooping out food onto the plates, “which, as you know, I always think is a dumb thing to do.”
“I want to have a baby,” you blurt, eyes widening at your outburst.
Bucky fumbles with the spoon, sending fried rice flying, muttering curses as he tries to catch it with no luck as it lands with a dull clunk on the table. The silence that follows is loud. It feels like your heart is in your throat as you wait for him to just say something, anything.
“This is… quite a mess I’ve made,” Bucky finally observes. His voice is a bit higher than usual. “Where’s your vacuum? Actually, do you have one of those mini ones? Or would Clorox wipes be better? You know what, I’ll do both.”
He nods decisively then turns an expectant look towards you. His eyes look a bit wild, but you wisely keep that to yourself.
Wordlessly, you direct him to your hall closet. You realize your error a second too late when he opens the closet and reaches for the vacuum on the top shelf, where the purchase you’d made months ago also rests. His fingers get caught in the plastic bag when he grabs the handheld vacuum and its contents spill out. He goes to catch them right away, but once it registers what they are, he lets go of them like they’re on fire and nearly drops the vacuum on his foot.
Heat has been steadily creeping up your neck, but now your whole body feels aflame with embarrassment. The two of you stare at the baby clothes lying unassumingly on the floor for a long moment, until Bucky quietly walks back to the table with the vacuum clutched tightly in his fist. He flicks the switch on and it whirs to life, sucking up the bits of rice scattered around the table.
There’s another lengthy silence after he turns the vacuum off and you're unable to find the right thing to say to break it. Bucky does it for you.
“So… You’re serious.”
You meet his eyes and sigh heavily. “Yeah.”
He blinks a few times before clearing his throat, schooling his expression carefully. “I didn’t realize you were seeing someone.”
You cough lightly and start picking the peas out of your fried rice. “Well, that would be because I’m not.”
“I don’t think I follow,” he admits slowly.
You sigh again, lowering your gaze to your lap. “Look, I’ve thought about this a lot, okay? I’ve given myself months to really make sure it’s what I want. I’m in a good place in my life to have one, Bucky, and I don’t want to feel pressured to wait until I might get married.” You lift your gaze to his. “I want to have a baby,” you repeat firmly. “And I don’t need a partner to have one.”
You’re not sure why you feel the need to defend yourself. It’s not up to Bucky what you decide to do. You don’t need his approval, or anyone else’s. Maybe it’s because, even though you know it's not true, it feels like you're making too hasty of a decision.
After a beat, Bucky amends, “Well, I mean… You do…”
“Oh my god, shut up, you know what I mean,” you groan as you smack his arm, glad that he's not calling you crazy or trying to talk you out of it.
He doesn’t even flinch, the jerk.
“Wait, so what were you reading when I got here?” he suddenly questions, brows furrowed.
“Nothing,” you say too quickly, guiltily.
“Let me see your laptop then,” he counters as he crosses his arms over his chest.
You flounder for a second, scoffing. “What? No!”
“It can’t be that embarrassing, just show me,” he wheedles.
“Absolutely not.”
“Let me see!”
“It’s private!”
“Don’t be a chicken.”
Your eye twitches. “I’m not a chicken.” Bucky smirks and before he can even open his mouth you interject with a finger pointed accusingly at his face, “Do not start clucking at me, Bucky. I’ll kick your ass,” you threaten, though it's weak and you're not the only one who knows it.
You glare when his smirk only widens. Slowly, he moves his arms like he’s gonna flap them like chicken wings.
“Ugh! God, fine! You wanna know what I was reading?” You open your laptop and slide it over to him, turning it to where he can read it. “There.”
Bucky scans the page, then scans it again, eyes flicking all over like it’s in a different language. His cheeks grow redder and redder as he reads and you get a small sense of satisfaction at the sight.
“Wow,” he mutters finally. “You’re turkey baster serious.”
“James Buchanan Barnes,” you say, pinching the bridge of your nose.
“What?” he asks innocently.
When you make eye contact with him, you purse your lips to keep the laughter threatening to bubble out at bay, but the ever growing smile on Bucky’s face is hard to resist and you find yourself snorting a laugh that leads to uncontrollable giggles. Bucky’s laughing with you, his eyes crinkling on the sides. The tension you hadn’t realized you held in your shoulders loosens and you nudge his knee with yours in silent thanks.
“So,” he says after you've both calmed down.
“So,” you repeat, dragging it out, drumming your fingers on the tabletop. “I’ve been doing research, checking out all of my options, and while artificial insemination seems like the best choice… I don’t know, there’s just something too clinical about it,” you reply, voicing your concerns, “It doesn’t feel right. I know I said I don’t need a partner, and I don’t, but… Having absolutely no connection is weird.”
You shrug, waving a hand as if to say oh well, putting an end to the conversation, and pick up your plate to carry it over to the microwave. You reheat Bucky’s food while you’re up, and then you both start eating in comfortable silence. He gets halfway through his meal before speaking up.
“Have you… I mean, did you think about… I’ve heard that, uh. Some people ask another person…”
He trails off, clearly frustrated that he can’t just spit out what he’s trying to say. You think you understand what he means, though.
“I read up on surrogacy,” you say, biting your lip. “But I don’t think I’d want someone else to carry my baby.”
“Oh, no, I didn’t mean—I wasn’t suggesting, uh, that. Not that there’s anything wrong with it!” he rushes to say.
You tilt your head. “What did you mean then?”
“Well,” Bucky starts, stilted, licking his lips. “For the artificial insemination, have you considered… you know. Asking someone you’re close with?”
You frown, not following.
“For—for the sperm,” he clarifies, shifting in his seat.
“Oh,” you breathe, blinking rapidly, surprised as you think of how to reply. “Um. No? I wouldn’t even know who I could ask, to be honest. That’s quite the request, you know? Who would—“
“Me,” he interrupts, determined and cheeks flushed, “I would.”
Your own face heats. “Oh,” you say again, quieter.
You can say, with full confidence, that not once did it cross your mind to ask anyone to help you, but you especially would have never given thought to asking Bucky.
For a list of reasons, really, with “it’s Bucky” being right at the very top. Like—sure, yes, you’re in love with him, but after two years of no signs of reciprocation you’ve learned to stop dreaming, to stop hoping. If the attraction was mutual he would have shown it by now, right? And on top of that, his friendship means the world to you and you wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize it. You'd never forgive yourself if you ever managed to fuck up the one good, constant thing going for you.
“Bucky,” you start, slow and careful, “this… This isn't something you can just jump into. It’s something you should think about for a while.”
He contemplates that for a second. “You’re right,” he concedes with a nod. “But…” He purses his lips, glancing away for a minute before turning back to you, leaning forward. “Okay listen, this is important for you. It’s going to change your whole life. You said it yourself, not having a connection to the sperm donor feels wrong. You’re my best friend, alright? I—care about you. You should pick someone you can trust.”
He clenches his jaw after he finishes speaking. You sort of hate the way your heart both flutters and plummets at his words. It’s nice to know you matter to him, just not in the way you’ve wanted for too long.
And if you’re really honest with yourself, Bucky would be a great choice as a donor. He’s in great health, has strong features that would look wonderful on any gender. But would you be able to handle the repercussions of having his child? Would you be able to look at your baby and see those features without it sending a pang through your chest every single time? You can’t say for certain.
Yet, the chance to have that type of connection with him, selfishly, sounds too good to pass up.
“At least think about it for a few days,” you murmur reluctantly.
It’s the most acceptance he’ll get and he knows it. A smile blooms across his face and you have to swallow down the warring emotions rising within you.
***
With the amount of research you do on the subject now, it doesn’t take long for you to find out that there are at-home kits for artificial insemination that are much easier (and cheaper). It’s easy to settle on that, clicking on the info to order your kit with butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
You read through the instructions online and it all sounds simple enough, until you get to the part where it says that having an orgasm after injection helps increase your chances of conception.
Blinking, heat crawling up your neck, you read that step several times, hoping you read it wrong, but it doesn’t change.
You… You can’t masturbate with Bucky’s sperm inside you. That’s a line you refuse to cross.
And besides, he’s a healthy man in his thirties who exercises regularly and eats fairly healthy food! You probably—definitely—won’t need to take that step. It’ll be fine. Probably.
Once the kit arrives, you call Bucky and ask him to come over so you can explain the process to him. Since he’s only across the hall of your apartment building, he’s there a moment later, letting himself in with his key.
“Let’s make a baby,” is how he greets you.
“Hold your horses,” you reply, fighting back a laugh. “I gotta walk you through everything first.”
He plops himself down next to you on your couch. “Fine, fine. Go ahead.”
Squaring your shoulders, you begin telling him how it all works, and what parts he is key for. You speak through your awkwardness, avoiding eye contact, when you explain that he’ll need to masturbate into a clean, sterile cup. You leave out how it’s suggested for you to also masturbate, deciding it’s not pertinent information for him to know.
“When do we start?” he asks once you’re done.
“I have to take an ovulation test first to find out the best days for me to conceive, but once I do that we’ll be able to, um.” You gesture vaguely. “I’ll be able to do the injections.”
He nods. “Alright.” He looks at you then, taking your hand in his and giving it a squeeze. “I’ll be here every step of the way, okay?”
“I know,” you say, smiling. “Thank you, Bucky.”
“You’re welcome,” he returns softly.
“No, really, thank you,” you assert. “This is a lot to take on and I can never fully repay you.”
Bucky shakes his head. “I want you to be happy, and I can see that having this baby is going to do that. I’ll do whatever I need to do to ensure it happens.”
You pull him into a hug, willing yourself to not cry. You’re not sure he’ll ever understand what this means for you, personally, or that you’d ever find a way to express it. He’s giving you so much more than just a baby.
***
The first injection time comes and you find yourself fidgeting where you sit as you wait for Bucky to bring over the, uh… sample. You do your best to not think about what he’s doing in his apartment, to not think about exactly how he’s collecting his sperm.
Now is not the time, you mentally scold yourself. Get it together.
A timid knock at your door alerts you to his presence. The fact he’s knocking says a lot about his own level of embarrassment about the situation.
His cheeks are pink when you open the door. “Uh, hi.”
“Hi,” you return.
He clears his throat and lifts the small cup in his hand. “Here’s… well, you know.”
You gingerly take it from him, not knowing what else to say, but when he smiles somewhat crookedly and turns to leave, you find yourself asking, “Will you stay?”
Bucky’s steps pause. “Huh?”
“Will you—I mean… Would you mind staying?” You shift on your feet. “This is a big moment for me. I-I don’t want to do it alone.”
“Are you asking me to…?” He trails off awkwardly.
“Oh! God, no, I wouldn’t—no,” you assure, huffing a laugh, “I’m doing the injection, I just need a little moral support. That’s all.”
Bucky smiles. “Sure, I’ll stay.”
Relief floods through you. You step aside to let him in, closing the door behind him. He follows you to your bedroom and just before entering you stop in your tracks, nearly causing Bucky to bump into you.
“Um,” you mutter, turning to him. “You’ll have to, ah, sit out here,” you explain. “I have to be lying down…”
Understanding dawns on him. “Oh! Right, right, of course. Sorry.”
“I’ll let you know when I’m done,” you promise.
He nods and watches you close the door. You walk over to your bed and sit down, glancing at the syringe you’ll be using and biting the inside of your cheek.
This is it. There’s really no going back after this. Sure, you may not get pregnant the first time, but Bucky’s already said he’d help you for as long as it takes. It’s just… very real now. You don’t feel any doubts, though. You want this.
Inhaling a large breath and slowly letting it out, hands shaking, you take the lid off the cup and pick up the syringe. You remember the instructions, making sure there’s as little air sucked in as possible when you draw out the semen, and getting rid of the few air bubbles that you see. You grab your pillows and lie down, propping them beneath you to lift your hips.
“Here I go,” you mumble to yourself, taking another deep breath and releasing it.
A couple minutes later, the syringe is empty and you’ve got your legs pulled up to your chest. You cover yourself with your blanket and call out Bucky’s name.
“You okay?” you hear through the door.
“Will you come here, please?” you ask.
He walks in cautiously, making sure you’re decently covered before entering fully, wisely not commenting on your position. “Well?”
“I did it,” you whisper.
He stays quiet, letting you parse through your thoughts. You blink when you feel tears threatening to gather in your eyes. He’s beside you in an instant, crawling in the bed and lying down, taking your hand in his.
“Congratulations,” he says softly.
“Don’t congratulate me yet,” you reply, sniffing and wiping at your eyes.
“Still,” he presses. “You’re one step closer now.”
He pulls your hand up and kisses the back of it. You give him a watery smile. The two of you lay there in silence for a moment before Bucky breaks it.
“This isn’t how I pictured myself making a baby.”
It startles a laugh out of you and Bucky grins, pleased to have helped ease the tense atmosphere. He distracts you with idle conversation after that, talking about his plans for the upcoming weekend, asking about yours, tells you about the newest stupid thing Sam did; he talks and talks and talks, until your anxiety is gone, and then he stays to cook dinner for you.
Your hug when he gets ready to head back to his apartment lasts a couple minutes longer than usual. Bucky quietly allows it, dropping a kiss on your forehead when you pull away.
“Same time next week?” he jokes, making you crack a smile.
“Goodbye, Bucky,” you reply exasperatedly as you close your door.
“Bye, sweetheart,” he returns over his shoulder.
***
Weeks pass. More injections. Pregnancy tests taken.
But nothing happens.
All of your tests come back negative.
When reading up on artificial insemination, and pregnancy in general, you’d understood that there was a chance it wouldn’t happen right away. You thought you were fine with that, that you’d be alright with the waiting and all. Looking at your growing collection of negative tests, however, has a sense of dread building within you. You do your best to quell it, telling yourself there’s no need to stress over it. Yet.
Besides, your mind supplies in an overly cheerful manner, there’s still one more method to try!
***
The next time Bucky brings over his sample, he lets himself in, like always, and passes along the cup with an encouraging smile. You try to smile back, but it feels more like a grimace. He either doesn’t notice or he at least pretends not to, thankfully.
But when he goes to make himself comfortable to wait, you’re reminded that you haven’t told him about the, uh… change in procedure, so to speak.
You clear your throat delicately. “I don’t think you’ll need to stick around this time.”
Bucky frowns. “Why not?”
“Because…” You trail off, cheeks pinking, yet not finishing the sentence, because how do you explain this?
“I promised you I’d be here every step of the way,” he recalls. “I intend to keep that promise.”
You wince. “I really appreciate where your heart is, Bucky, I really do, but I literally cannot let you be here for this injection.”
“Why not?”
You look heavenward for mercy. “I have to…”
When you don’t finish your sentence again, Bucky raises a single brow, gesturing for you to go on. “You have to… what?”
You huff, throwing your arms out. “I have to orgasm, okay?”
His eyes go a little bit wide, but you can tell he tries to control his reaction. He swallows, shifting where he sits on the couch.
“Oh,” he mumbles. “Have… have you had to do that before?”
“No. Well, I mean, it was suggested, but I never…”
His eyebrows furrow. “Does it help or something?”
You absently scratch your neck. “They say it increases the chances of conception.”
“But you haven’t been doing… that.”
“I didn’t think I’d need to.”
Bucky inhales like he’s going to say something, but then doesn’t.
“Yeah, so, I don’t think you should be here,” you utter, quickly adding, “No offense.”
“No, yeah, that’s fair, um. I’ll just—I’ll head back to my apartment,” he states as he stands. “You can—I mean, if you still want me to—I can come back over? After you… uh…”
“I’ll let you know,” you reply, voice tight and high.
He nods, looking lost and like he wants to say more but thinks better of it. Finally, he mutters a soft bye and is out the door.
Alone now, your stomach feels like it’s tying itself in knots and your heart is doing its damnedest to beat out of your chest. You try to tell yourself that it’s just another injection, that this is the same as any other time you've done this, but you know it’s not. It's really, really not.
Laying down on your bed, syringe in hand, is much more nerve wracking than before. On your left lies a new addition to your routine. You don’t know why you’re acting like such a prude all the sudden. It’s not like you’ve never masturbated before. Though, you suppose the major difference is that you didn’t have Bucky’s sperm hangin’ out in your vagina all those other times while you did it.
“Quit being such a goober about this,” you tell yourself.
This has to be done for a reason. If you want to have a baby—and you do, very badly—then you’re gonna have to deal with the process.
Once you’ve injected the sperm, you reach for your bullet vibrator next to your left hand. The instructions say not to insert anything, only to stimulate your clit. You try to clear your head, think of it as a chore or something, yet it’s hard not to think of a certain someone.
The vibrator buzzes with the press of a button. You adjust your hips, making sure they’re tilted, then bring the vibrator to your clit. The first touch makes your stomach tense and thighs spasm.
You close your eyes, running the toy along your slit. You really don’t want to drag this out, would prefer to get it over with as quickly as possible, but your mind begins running away with images.
Bucky, settled between your spread thighs, one hand resting on one of them, the other controlling the vibrator. You imagine he’d tease you, slowly trail it along the crease of your thighs, over your hips; everywhere but where you wanted it.
Bucky would probably give in once you whine and beg enough, once your desperation bled into your voice, and hold the vibrator directly to your clit, drink in your cries of pleasure like they’re the finest whisky.
He’d mutter soft but firm encouragement, tell you how good you’re doing, how good you sound. He’d start circling the vibrator, going from quick to lazy swirls, then he’d change the setting to a higher one just to hear you whimper. His free hand would run up your torso to pinch at your nipples for added stimulation.
When you imagine him leaning down to add his tongue into the mix, your mind blanks as your climax hits you, a ragged moan forcing its way out of your throat. You’re quick to turn the vibrator off and toss it to the floor, deciding you’ll worry about cleaning it later, chest heaving as you pant for breath after an intense orgasm.
Shame and embarrassment consume you, mock you for using Bucky to rub one out. You’d given in to the fantasy so easily.
Truthfully, it’s not the first time you’ve thought of him while pleasuring yourself, but the context this time is completely different, and you feel immediately guilty. Admittedly, it’s probably irrational.
That doesn’t stop you from cringing at your actions.
***
You’re sure you’ve bought out the entire pregnancy test section from the convenience store down the block. Currently, there are six different brands in front of you, all promising the most accurate results.
Bucky is sitting in your bedroom, quietly waiting for you to pee on all of them so you can both find out what they say. You chug the last bit of your third bottle of water even though your bladder is fit to burst at any moment. Turning the faucet on for modesty, you make quick work of the tests, then wash your hands.
And wait.
You call Bucky into the bathroom with you. The two of you quietly sit on the edge of your bathtub, counting down the minutes. Part of you wishes Bucky would say something dumb to break the tension, like he usually does, but you're also kind of glad he's just here, next to you, a silent comfort.
It seems like hours have passed when you’re finally sure you can check them.
The first one is negative, and so is the second. The third, however, reads positive. Your heart begins racing, clutching at the counter, but before your hopes get too carried away you read the rest. To your dismay, they are all negative. You stare down at them all, eyes falling on the loan positive test multiple times, knowing that it’s likely a false positive, yet stupidly hoping otherwise.
Your chin wobbles. Bucky hugs you from behind, resting his cheek on your shoulder.
“What do I do, Bucky?”
At your broken whisper, he sighs. “I don’t know, sweetheart.”
Neither of you know what to say or do after that. Bucky continues offering quiet support, his solid presence at your back, and you’re grateful. Eventually, he leads you out of the bathroom and into the kitchen, sitting you down at the table as he starts preparing dinner.
When you’re both eating the spaghetti he made, he breaks the silence.
“Do you think…” he starts, pausing to think of how to phrase his question before carefully carrying on. “Are you going to stop?”
“I don’t want to,” you answer, the implied but hanging heavy in the air.
Bucky sits his fork down. “I know you want this, very much.” He pushes his hair out of his face as he leans forward, elbows settling on the table. “But I hate seeing how sad you get when the tests come out negative. I feel so… powerless. Like I could be doing more or something.”
“You’re doing all you can, Bucky,” you assure.
“That’s the thing, though. I don’t think I am.”
You frown. “What do you mean?”
He licks his lips, locking his fingers together. “I think we should have sex.”
Your fork drops to your plate with a clang, eyes going wide.
“I apologize for how blunt that came out,” he states with a wince. “But, I mean, think about it. You’ve only been using my sperm from a syringe, and up until the last time, you hadn’t been, um, orgasming with it.” You look away, bashful. “I just wonder if maybe trying the old-fashioned way would give you better results.”
“Bucky,” you start, opening and closing your mouth a couple times before shaking your head. “It’s one thing for you to offer your sperm, which I’m thankful for, truly, but… Having sex?”
“I’ve already told you I’m willing to do whatever I need to do,” he retorts earnestly. “Your happiness means a lot to me, okay? I hate sitting around and watching your heart break every week. You’ve tried it your way, now I think we should try mine.”
“I-I don’t know,” you hesitate, chewing on the inside of your cheek, knee beginning to bounce under the table.
His hand slides onto your knee, stilling the movement as he ducks his head to meet your gaze. His eyes are impossibly sincere and your resolve crumbles in an instant.
“It won’t… It’s not going to change anything,” he assures. “I won’t allow it.”
You swallow roughly. He may not, but your heart is going to take its toughest beating yet. It’s going to be hopeless trying to overcome the inevitable emotions that come with sex.
Even so, somehow, your longing for a baby eclipses all of this. Now that you’ve imagined holding your child in your arms, raising them and loving them, you can’t go back. Not anymore.
“Okay,” you allow, softly.
Bucky’s shoulders relax, lips tipping up into a devastating smile.
You’re so fucked. (Pun intended.)
***
Two nights later, you’re pacing in your bedroom, impatiently waiting for Bucky to arrive. You’d been unsure whether or not you should dress up. You didn’t see the point, honestly. Still, a small part of you wondered what his reaction would be if he saw you all done up in lingerie. At the moment, you’re in an oversized t-shirt and pajama shorts.
It’s Bucky, you think, and this isn’t a normal situation, it doesn’t matter what I’m wearing.
You hear his key turning in the lock then and your heart begins hammering away. He calls your name as he enters.
“In here,” you reply, twisting your fingers nervously.
He walks into your room looking just as on edge as you are. He also seems to have had the same idea about his attire, comfortable in his white tee and sweatpants. His feet are bare and for whatever reason that feels way more intimate than it has any right to.
“Hey,” he greets.
“Hi.”
You bite your lip, eyes flitting around your room and coming back to settle on Bucky. He huffs.
“This is ridiculous,” he declares, “It’s just us.”
“Right,” you nod, biting the inside of your cheek.
“It’s not gonna be weird.”
“Nope.”
His jaw ticks. You stare back at him. It only takes a moment for you to realize that somebody has to make the first move, so you steel yourself and turn on your heel, walking towards your bed.
“I’m keeping my shirt on,” you announce as you unceremoniously drop onto the mattress, grabbing your pillows to stuff them under you.
Bucky follows at a sedate pace, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. He pauses next to you, taking a second to roll his shoulders, then he climbs in and settles in front of your bent legs. He gingerly places his hands on your knees.
“May I?” he asks.
Mouth suddenly dry, you nod. He moves his hands to the waistband of your shorts and tugs. You lift your hips to help him slide them down and off, along with your underwear. Gently, he spreads your legs.
Your breathing has picked up considerably, eyes firmly trained on the ceiling. You know you’re already wet and are blessedly thankful he doesn’t mention it.
The first slide of his fingers has you inhaling sharply. He slowly gathers your slick and trails it up to your clit, lightly circling it. Your mind recalls your fantasy, but you quickly shove it back to the depths of your thoughts, lest you do something idiotic like tell him about it.
He spreads your legs more, adjusting his position between them. His fingers move down until he can sink one into you. You gasp, hands shooting out to grasp your sheets. He wastes no time and begins thrusting his finger inside you.
It becomes quickly apparent to you that it’s going to be very difficult to hold back any noise or reactions. Goddamnit, you will try, though!
When he decides it’s time to add another finger, you feel yourself clench around them, and his soft fuck does not go unnoticed, evident in the way your pussy traitorously clenches again.
“Can I…?” he asks, voice cracking, but doesn’t finish his thought, making you have to break your staring contest with the ceiling and look at him.
He’s not even looking back at you, he’s staring at his fingers, watching them pump in and out of you, half bent over with a slack jaw, like he wants to…
He meets your eyes then, licking his lips.
Oh.
Swallowing around the sudden lump in your throat, knowing you’re probably going to regret it, you nod.
He’s leaning over and sucking on your clit before you can even blink. You cry out, thighs trying to clamp around his head, but his free hand shoots out to hold you open. It makes you squirm, fisting the sheets even tighter. His fingers curl inside you as his tongue licks around them and you whine, high and needy, and then mouth is back on your clit, tongue swiping over it, sucking on it with loud, obscene noises.
His hand comes up to grab the hem of your shirt, shoves it upward until it’s bunched underneath your breasts. Those fingers ghost back down your torso, goosebumps erupting in their wake.
He speeds up his thrusts and your hand flies down to grip his hair. You don’t think you’re meant to hear the quiet grunt he lets out, but you do, and it has you panting even harder. Your orgasm is building, fast, and you pull on his hair in warning.
“Bucky,” you say on a gasp.
Using his arm to hold you down, his free hand joins, thumb swiping over your clit now as he dips his head to slide his tongue in alongside his fingers. It draws a yell out of you, the ever expanding pleasure within you bursting into the hardest orgasm you’ve experienced thus far in your adult life. You know you’re moaning, bucking into the sensations coursing through you, and you’d feel abashed if you didn’t feel so fucking good.
Before you can become too sensitive, Bucky withdraws his fingers and sits up. You can’t even really catch your breath, though, because in the next second he’s whipping his t-shirt off and shoving his sweatpants down far enough to free his cock.
Your thighs do clamp closed then, at the sight of how thick he is, and he tries and fails to keep his smirk hidden.
“Oh, shut up,” you wheeze.
“Didn’t say anything,” he counters.
He doesn’t let you argue, choosing that moment to shuffle closer and line up with your opening. Cautiously, he eases himself inside, inch by inch. Your mouth drops open, brows furrowing as he fills you, stretching you so perfectly. When he’s in as far as he can go, the breath wooshes out of him, his head falling back. You know he’s trying to be polite and let you adjust, but—
“Oh my god, move,” you demand, impatient.
He huffs a laugh, dropping his heavy lidded gaze to yours. “Bossy.”
“Did you really expect anything else—oh!”
The grin he aims your way after grinding into you is downright sinful. You mentally tell yourself to kick him for that later.
He grabs your hips and the pillows and settles you closer to his lap, changing the angle, then pulls out and glides back in, creating a painstakingly slow rhythm.
You have to close your eyes. You can’t look at him anymore. You knew he was probably a god in bed, but to now have firsthand experience? There was no way you’d be able to fuck anyone else without comparing them.
His grip on your hips tightens, the only warning you get before his thrusts turn sharp.
“Fuck,” you cry out, your hands reaching up to grip the pillow beneath your head.
The sound of your skin meeting his is harsh in the otherwise quiet room. Well, okay, you’re not exactly being quiet, but you can’t be blamed for that.
Bucky, however, is nearly silent. The only thing you hear from him is heavy breathing. You wonder if he’s holding back, the thought crossing your mind for a split second, and then you’re clenching around his cock, trying to see if you can gain a reaction. And boy, do you get one.
He grunts and sucks in a breath, lips parting as his eyes squeeze shut. His hips pick up their pace and hair falls into his face. You find yourself wishing he was closer so you could brush it out of the way.
Stop it, you scold yourself.
He pauses to grind into you again, your walls fluttering around his throbbing cock, and you both sigh. Bucky leans forward, hooking your legs into the crooks of his elbows, and resumes his brutal pace.
“O-Oh,” you whimper.
The new angle is heavenly, his cock dragging along a spot inside you that you thought nobody else could find. Unable to help yourself, you clutch at his arms, nails digging in.
“Shit,” he groans, thrusts faltering.
He lets go of one of your legs to slip his hand between you, rubbing at your clit and sending you that much closer to your second orgasm. He can tell you’re close, but you’re gonna need something to push you over the edge. He leans down even closer, breath fanning out against your cheek.
“C’mon,” he pants. “Let go.”
You shiver when his tongue flicks your earlobe and sucks it into his mouth, keening as the pressure builds. He thrusts harder, faster, and when you grasp his hair and pull, he growls and latches on to your shoulder, biting down. You gasp from the added pain and then you’re coming, shuddering and whining through your release. Bucky isn’t far behind, raising up and fucking into you savagely before pausing abruptly, groaning as he finally comes. He lazily thrusts a few more times to draw it out, then stops, stilling with his cock inside you.
Your hair is sticking to your forehead, as well as your shirt to your clammy back, breathing in lungfuls of air. Bucky is softly caressing your thighs, letting out shaky breaths as your pussy continues to flutter around him.
It takes several moments for you to gather your wits, for the rest of the world to come filtering back in. You are truly and completely fucked now, in every sense of the word.
“Well…” You trail off, voice scratchy.
“That was…”
“Mhm,” you mumble.
Bucky sighs heavily. “Let’s hope it worked this time.”
You hum. “Thank you for your service,” you reply with a lazy salute.
You yelp when he pinches your hip, kicking at him in retaliation. The jostling reminds you, with a gasping groan, that he’s still buried balls deep inside you.
“Um.” You cough lightly. “You wanna, you know… pull out?”
He looks down where you’re connected like it hadn’t even dawned on him. “Oh, uh. Well, I thought maybe it could, like. Help.”
His gaze stays locked, fingers flexing on your hips, and you feel like squirming again.
“I think it’s good,” you say quietly.
Bucky finally glances back up at your shy tone, cheeks pinking. He clears his throat.
“Right.”
Carefully, he eases his softening cock out of you, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from making a noise.
You can’t hold back yours, though, gasping once he’s gone. You feel unbearably empty, but refrain from voicing that incessant thought.
Bucky’s intense eyes stare at your pussy until you reach for the throw blanket next to you. He watches you throw it over your lap, drawing your legs up to your chest, and takes that as his cue, jolting into action.
“Okay, so.” He starts, then stops, climbs off your bed and pulls his sweatpants back up. “This was—I mean, if it doesn’t take this time, we can… try again.”
“Yeah,” you mutter. “Sounds good.”
He nods, bending to pick up his discarded t-shirt. “Great. I’ll just, um, see myself out, I guess.”
You nod, sending a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes in his direction. He seems to contemplate something for a second, then leans down to kiss your forehead before saying a quick goodbye and leaving.
As soon as you hear your apartment door shut, you let your tears fall.
***
It’s not really like you mean to avoid him after that.
Honest.
You simply become busy, that’s all. You definitely don’t go out of your way by taking the stairs in your apartment building to avoid possibly bumping into him in the elevator. No, you take the stairs because you could use the cardio. It’s important you stay healthy right now. And when he texts you to ask if you want to have dinner, you can’t help that you’ve got boatloads of work to catch up on—all five times he asks.
Okay, so, that’s a lie. You’re totally avoiding him. But what on earth are you supposed to say to him now? You don’t think you’d even be able to look him in the eye anymore, not after the fuck of your goddamn life.
That night confirmed what you already knew for the last two years: Bucky absolutely ruined you for anyone else.
More than anything, though, you were angry with yourself. He’d only offered because you weren’t getting your desired results the other way. You should have been able to separate your feelings and emotions from all of it. After all, none of this was about whatever you feel towards Bucky. This was about trying to conceive a baby.
You try telling yourself to get over it. He’s your best friend, you can’t just cut him off because you’re a spineless pansy.
I just need some time, you reason. You can give yourself a few days to wallow over what could have been and then you can reach out to him and pretend like everything is fine. Because it is.
***
Flash forward two weeks to you attempting to sneak into your apartment, only to jump out of your skin when you turn around and find Bucky sitting on your couch, an unreadable expression on his face.
“Oh, good, you’re still alive,” he drawls.
His tone suggests annoyance. You suppose you deserve that.
“Hey,” you say after a pause.
He stares at you for a moment longer before speaking again. “I thought we agreed we wouldn’t let it get weird.”
You agreed, you almost say, thankfully biting it back. You drop your purse on the entryway table, sliding your shoes off and making your way over to sit next to him.
“I’m sorry,” you mumble. You tug your sweater sleeves down and tuck your feet beneath you. “I haven’t ever… I’ve never been intimate with a friend before. It was just… a lot.”
It’s a half truth, at least. You haven’t had sex with a friend before. Or, well, not one you had feelings for.
“You could’ve just told me,” he replies, reaching for your hand.
You nod. “I know, and I should have, I just. Things are all out of whack lately with the whole… trying to get pregnant thing.”
“If I overstepped in any way—” Bucky starts, but you’re quick to interrupt.
“You didn’t,” you promise. “You’ve been nothing but fantastic throughout this whole ordeal. Honestly, Bucky, you’ve done way more than anyone else would have in this situation. I just had a lot going on in my head and let it get the best of me. I’m fine, I swear.”
He searches your eyes and must find what he’s looking for.
“Don’t shut me out again,” he pleads.
Heart cracking in your chest, you can only nod, shuffling closer to pull him into a hug. He buries his face in your neck and holds on tight.
***
Another week passes.
Bucky is with you as you wait for the results of the latest pregnancy test. He’s reassured you that you’ll keep trying until it happens if it didn’t work this time.
When the timer on your phone goes off, you release the breath you’ve been holding. You take tentative steps over to the sink and gingerly pick up the test.
Positive.
Your stomach swoops. It’s positive. You check again, reading the digitized screen, but it stays the same. Positive. Holy shit.
“Okay, wait, no, I need to do more. I can’t get my hopes up again,” you mutter, rushing to open the cabinet under your sink to dig out several more varieties of tests.
You don’t even wait for Bucky to leave before you’re peeing on the other sticks. He’s seen it all at this point anyway, and he doesn’t seem to care, sitting on the edge of your tub with an anxious expression. The downside is that you have to wait another few minutes for these tests to finish and you can’t sit still, pacing back and forth in the small space of your bathroom.
The timer goes off again. You feel like you’re going to throw up when you finally work up the courage to look down.
Every single one of them… Positive.
A shocked, happy laugh escapes you. You cover your mouth, turning to Bucky with wide eyes.
He rises to his full height, coming closer and peering down at the tests, then back to your teary eyed expression.
“Did we…?”
Words failing you, you nod, giggling in astonishment. Bucky’s face breaks into the biggest, handsomest, most gut-wrenching smile. His happiness is palpable and you’re suddenly so overcome with emotion. Your hands are gripping his face and angling it to align your lips to his before you register what you’re doing. He freezes and you hurriedly pull away, taking a few steps back.
“I’m so sorry, I-I don’t know why—”
“Shut up,” he cuts you off, closing the gap between you in a single stride.
He kisses you like his life depends on it, pressing your bodies as close as possible, his hands cupping your cheeks. You clutch his shirt desperately, never wanting to let go. He steals the breath straight from your lungs when he swipes at the seam of your lips with his tongue, moaning happily when you allow him access. A feeble whine from you after he flicks his tongue against yours makes him break the kiss.
“I have a confession,” he breathes into the miniscule space between your mouths.
“What?” you question distractedly.
“I’m in love with you.”
Your gaze shoots up to his, astounded. He brushes stray hairs off your forehead, runs his thumbs softly under your eyes.
“I’ve been selfish this whole time,” he reveals. “I couldn’t let you choose some random stranger to be your sperm donor, to father your child, couldn’t bear the thought of you carrying their baby, because I’ve been in love with you since the moment I met you. I wanted to be the one. And I’m sorry for not telling you sooner, but I’m not sorry I did it.”
You’re hearing the words, yet your brain can’t seem to make sense of them. Surely you’re hearing him wrong. You can’t possibly have this too, right? You can't have Bucky and have his baby…
But he’s here, very real and solid beneath your hands, looking at you like you’re his entire world.
“Bucky…” You trail off, struggling to find the right words, at a complete loss. “I-I’ve loved you for so long now, I didn’t think you…” You shake your head, a giggle escaping you as you stare at him in wonder. “I couldn’t let myself hope.”
He grins, relieved, planting a few chaste kisses to your mouth. “I know this entire circumstance is totally backwards, but I want you, and I want this baby. I meant it when I said I’m not going anywhere.”
Fresh tears gather in the corners of your eyes. “Are you sure?” you still ask.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything.”
You have to kiss him then, uncaring of the tears that trickle down your face. The only thing you are focused on is the way his hands trail down your back, pausing to squeeze your ass, then grip underneath to lift you. Your legs wrap around his waist, arms locked around his neck, as he heads for your bed. He makes a point of throwing your extra pillows on the floor before settling between your thighs and kissing the hell out of you.
He pulls away only to undress you and himself, but he’s always back as quickly as possible, lips pressing kisses wherever he can reach. You impatiently tug at him until his lips are attached to yours again. The way he fucks his tongue into your mouth is nothing short of indecent and it sends a rush of pure want all the way to your core.
When you bury your fingers in his hair, gripping it tight, he grunts, biting your lip. You whimper and he grins as he pulls away.
“You make the most beautiful sounds,” he praises, his hands beginning to sweep down and up, tickling under your breasts.
His thumb and forefinger pinch one of your nipples and you gasp, back arching off your mattress. He repeats it on the other side, just to hear the same noise.
“Bucky, please,” you beg.
“Please what?” he prods. His hands drift further to the creases of your thighs, spreading them open. “What do you need?”
You whine, canting your hips up. “You, I need you, please.”
“You have me, sweetheart.” He tilts his head and you make a noise of frustration. “Use your words, darlin’.”
“Fuck me, please,” you burst out, feeling your pussy clench around nothing.
Bucky smiles, slow and torturous. “Yeah? Want me to fuck you? Fuck this perfect pussy until you’re so full of my come that it drips down your beautiful thighs?”
“Oh god,” you mumble.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” he teases.
His fingers slide down your slit, gathering your slick then thrusts two fingers in at once. You groan brokenly, shifting your hips to try and get more friction, but he holds them down with his metal arm. Agonizingly slow, he begins fucking you with his fingers. It’s good, it’s amazing, but it’s not enough. Not when you know what his cock feels like. He takes his precious time fingering you and you’re sure you’re going to lose your mind before the day is done.
“You have no idea how incredible you felt around my cock,” he tells you in a ridiculously conversational tone. “I was trying to think of any excuse I could come up with to have you at least one more time.”
He shifts until his mouth is directly above where you’re dripping for him, and he waits until you make eye contact with him.
“But now I’m gonna spend the rest of my life making you come apart on my cock any chance I get.”
You hardly have any functioning brain cells at the moment, but even if you could form a coherent sentence you wouldn’t have been able to say it aloud, because then he’s descending and all you can feel is the wet warmth of his mouth.
He definitely doesn’t hold back this time, that much is apparent in the way he devours you, lips and tongue drawing out noises you’ve never heard yourself make, pressing his face so far into your pussy that he has to come up for air. His mouth and chin shine when you chance a look down, and when you clench on his fingers his smile goes smug at the corners.
He plants kisses along your hips, the insides of your thighs, around where his fingers are buried within you. He curls them, in search of the spot he found last time. He knows he found it when you try to close your thighs around his head and cry out. Now that he's found it, he angles to brush it on every thrust of his fingers and attaches his mouth back on your clit.
You chant his name, nearly sobbing as you approach your climax, until finally you fly over the edge. Your vision blurs and you’re not sure if you’re making any noise now, unable to hear past the blood rushing in your ears. Bucky helps you ride it out until you’re shuddering from sensitivity.
He kisses your thighs again, trailing them up your stomach and between the valley of your breasts.
“So good, did so well,” he mutters.
Weakly, you lift your hands to trace them down his toned stomach and around his back, down further so you can cop a feel of your own, smiling at his grunt of surprise.
“That was great and all,” you say, arching your back so your chest presses against his, “but I do believe I asked you to fuck me.”
He arches an eyebrow. “Who said I was done with you?” It’s apparently a rhetorical question, as he continues before you get a chance to reply. “I’m gonna fuck you until you come, and then I’m gonna keep fucking you until you come again, and only then will I come so deep inside you there’ll be zero doubt I’ve put a baby there.”
Your legs are lifted and thrown over his shoulders in a blink, his cock pushing into your pussy, dragging out a high-pitched moan from you. There’s barely a pause and then he’s fucking you, just like you asked. The pace is brutal right from the start, a steady rhythm that has you mewling and writhing in pleasure. Bucky is watching his cock as he thrusts in and out of you, his mouth hanging open slightly as he pants. He hikes your hips up a little higher and you jolt through your startled moan. This angle is divine and the telltale signs of your second orgasm start tingling at the base of your spine.
“Can feel you,” Bucky says through panting breaths, “so close. C’mon, let me feel you.”
He pulls you down on his cock, grinding into you, his thumb reaching to rub tight circles over your clit. You sob through your release, shuddering against Bucky as you clench around him. He groans, still barely moving as you come down from your high.
“Fuck,” he grunts. “Come here.”
He helps you sit up, still seated on his cock, making you both hiss from your movement. Your arms automatically wrap around his shoulders and his around your waist. He kisses you so sweetly, a stark contradiction to the way he just fucked you. When you pull away, resting your foreheads together, he grins.
“Hi.”
You crack a smile. “Hi.”
“Ready for more?” he asks, wiggling his eyebrows.
“You think you got it in you?” you tease as you play with the hair at the nape of his neck.
The light smack to your ass startles you and you let out a soft sound of surprise, hands tugging his hair harshly. Bucky’s eyes light up.
“Interesting,” he muses.
Another slap, a little harder than the first, and you’re whimpering, your walls clenching around his still hard cock.
“I’ll play with that later,” he promises, voice breathy.
You bury your face in his neck and start shifting your hips. He takes the hint, gathering you as close as he can and thrusts up into you. He can’t pull out as far this way, but the snap of his hips more than makes up for it. You mouth at his collarbone messily, kissing and licking your way up to his jaw, biting marks wherever you see fit. You make it up to his mouth and he kisses you, wet and filthy. You suck on his tongue and a ragged moan claws its way out of his throat. The need for air eventually has you pulling away.
“It’s a good thing you love me back,” you whisper in his ear. “Nobody else could ever compare to you.”
He growls, fisting your hair and yanking your head back to look him in the eye.
“Nobody will ever compare,” he corrects.
You moan. “Yes,” you agree, whining, “No one else could’ve given me a baby.”
Bucky thrusts harder and faster at your words. You’re picking up on a few hints and you can’t say it’s not doing it for you either.
“Filled me up so good, fucked me so well. Gonna be round with your baby soon.”
“Fuck, fuck,” he keens, hurrying to lay you flat on your back so he can fuck into you easier.
The sound of skin meeting skin fills the room, your cries of pleasure mixing in with Bucky’s grunts and curses. His grip on you tightens almost painfully as he chases both your and his orgasm. You’re sure to have bruises tomorrow and you already know you'll be poking at them to remember this moment.
“C’mon, baby, wanna feel you too,” you beg.
His thumb finds your swollen clit once more. It’s beyond sensitive now, feels like a shockwave coursing through you, and without any warning, you come. You spasm around Bucky and he swears under his breath, thrusts going sloppy. With a final groan, he comes inside you, his hips moving seemingly on their own as he draws out both your pleasures. Slowly, he comes to a stop, but he leaves his cock buried in you like he did last time.
You know you’re gonna feel too empty when he does pull out, so you don’t mind sitting like this for a while. Bucky softly runs his hands across every inch of your skin he can touch and you bask in the affection. You card your fingers through his sweaty hair, smiling when he hums happily. It takes only a minute for you to notice the way his hands migrate to your stomach, and when you do you kiss his shoulder.
“Maybe we should go again later,” you suggest faintly.
Bucky grins. “We can do it a hundred more times if you want.”
“Guess I better enjoy it while I can.”
His smile goes soft at the edges.
It’s not lost on you how incredibly crazy all of this is. There will undoubtedly be a conversation, a much needed one that isn’t going to be simple or easy, but it’s necessary.
For now, though, you bask in Bucky’s warmth and loving embrace.
***
Keys jingle as they unlock the door and you perk up where you’re sprawled on the couch. Bucky enters, arms laden with bags from the convenience store.
“They didn’t have the banana ice cream you asked for,” he announces, continuing before your pout fully forms, “but they did have the double chocolate brownie kind you love so much, so I got that, as well as the sour gummy worms, beef jerky, and fried pickles from the deli on your list of demands.”
“What about—”
“And your strawberry Fanta,” he adds with a fond, slightly exasperated smile.
You’re unable to stop your expression from going soft and dreamy.
Ever since you and Bucky figured out where to go with your relationship, he’s been even more attentive and accommodating (and that’s saying something).
You expressed your worry about the possibility of something going wrong, that one or both of you would get bored and leave, or there’d be a big fight that neither of you could forgive. He was quick to reassure you of his commitment, told you there was no way he would ever get bored of you, and that as long as you both promise to talk things out in a calm, mature way, then you’d be alright.
It all sounded so easy when it was put like that. The more you thought about it, though, the more you realized he was right. It wasn’t fair to either of you to already give up before you’d even started. So you’d taken a deep breath and leaped.
Now, you’re five and a half months in, your belly steadily growing and making everyday life increasingly uncomfortable. The changes to your body were physically and emotionally draining, to say the least. Moreso the emotional side. You’d hoped you wouldn’t be one of those pregnant women with strange cravings, and for the most part they were pretty tame, but you do like to dip your sour gummy worms in banana ice cream. Bucky didn’t attempt to hide his disgust over that.
“What did I do to deserve you?” you ask on a pleased sigh.
He places your small cornucopia of goods on the coffee table. You sit up, huffing for breath during the struggle. You go to reach for the ice cream first, but Bucky catches your hand, lacing his fingers with yours and kissing your knuckles as he kneels in front of you.
“You were yourself. Smart, kind, selfless, unbelievably sexy.” You snort at that, but he’s undeterred. “And you’re giving me the best gift I could ever dream of. A family.”
Instantly, you’re crying. He’s grown accustomed to the mood swings by now, taking it in stride as he wipes away the tears with gentle hands.
“Stop being so disgusting,” you blubber through your hiccuping cries. “You’re such an asshole.”
Bucky laughs. “I love you too, sweetheart.”
You sniffle, kissing him. “Love you,” you grumble.
He leans down and plants the softest of kisses to your belly. “And I love you, little lady.”
The idea of you having a child one day always seemed foreign and unlikely, but life has a way of turning out exactly how it’s supposed to… And you wouldn’t change a thing.
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moonchild1 · 4 months
Text
 kim taehyung fic rec list (Ⅴ)
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hello everyone i know it's been a while since i posted, work has been hectic, but i got some time and managed to finish a list so please enjoy i have a few lists ready to post so i'll que them up... here's my all time favourite taehyung fics, please show lots of love and support to these wonderful authors and their blogs, leave a heart, reblog or even leave a message or feedback under their posts i know they would appreciate hearing from you, some of these fics contain smut so no minors allowed you will be blocked ♡ feel free to recommend me some fics or just share what your reading right now i'd love hearing from you 🖤✨
a- angst s- smut f- fluff
series
only here to sin by @gimmethatagustd s a ft. namjoon
When your genius of a boyfriend returns to Harvard for his sophomore year of college, you never would have expected to have his worst enemy keeping you entertained in his absence.
our gray winter by @vyduan s a ft. jjk
“Were you looking for this?” Taehyung asked as he handed you the box of tampons you always bought. He remembered. You wanted to sink into the floor and die. Instead, you recalled your manners and said, “Thanks.” You put the box in your basket. “I can’t believe you remembered.” He beamed at you. It was patently unfair how he could look all glowy and soft while you looked… not like that. “Of course, Y/N.” If possible, Taehyung’s voice dropped even lower. “I remember everything about you.”
schemes and tricks to win her heart by @crystaljins ft. ksj
Rich company heir Kim Seokjin has a plan to win the heart of the girl of his dreams, and you, his little brother’s best friend, are dragged along for the ride. His younger brother objects, of course.
camboy!tae by @hisunshiine f s a
Give me all of your love, gimme something to dream about. KTH is your favorite camboy, and as a loyal subscriber, you are chosen to test out some new features on the platform he uses to go live. He’s really good at selling his viewers a dream, and as a thanks to a new milemark he’s hit on the platform, he’s choosing one winner to get their fantasy scene. 
tolerate it by @archivedkookie s a
Taehyung is your husband, and you love him. If only he loved you back; if only he cherished your love and not tolerated it.
what was hidden by @daechwitatamic s a ft. myg
This is how it all starts: Taehyung is flunking Western Lit. You're assigned to tutor him. His paper on Strindberg's The Ghost Sonata could pass or fail him for the semester. As you and Taehyung slowly become friends, then more, you learn that there's a lot more to him than you originally assumed. Together, you navigate your own experiences with the play’s themes: one's "true self" versus one's "shown self", darkness behind the facade, and how people can be quite literally haunted - and it has nothing to do with ghosts.
complete faith by @daechwitatamic
It’s Taehyung himself who admits that it’s usually around the one-month mark that he starts to lose interest in his relationships. So even though you’re so drawn to him you can barely stand it, even though he’s attentive and funny, even though you’re helplessly crazy about him… when you start dating, you feel like you’ve got an expiration date from day one. But will it be Taehyung’s issues that get in the way, or your own?
and they were roommates by @hoseok666 f s a ft. jjk
it all started with a rejection from your longtime crush, jeon jungkook. you decided to confess to him on your last day of high school. after a harsh rejection and a rough summer dealing with the heartbreak, you were starting anew once your freshman year of college came. you were going to be sharing an apartment with two other roommates that you don’t even know. what a surprise you’re going to be in for once you find out it’s the one and only: jeon jungkook and kim taehyung. 
with a brush of fate by @yoongiofmine f s a
Your roommate was sure she found you the perfect man. Her boyfriend believed he found Taehyung’s soulmate. The only problem was that you never wanted to date an idol and he never wanted to drag you into this life. Taehyung didn’t even know what he wanted anymore and was tired of being criticized for simply growing up. You just wanted to finish university and do something for yourself. What started out with the meddling of your friends became something neither of you expected. Could the two of you be what the other is missing? Or would things just fall apart?
groovy by @kinktae f s a
Even in the 70s, it goes without saying that you shouldn’t have feelings for your best friend’s little sister. 
tempting by @/kinktae s a
Y/N is an angel. She steers clear of the seven deadly sins, especially lust. She runs into a demon but, luckily for her, that demon doesn’t seem to buy into that whole “Angels and Demons are sworn enemies” idea. But unluckily for her, he just so happens to be the very embodiment of sin. Especially lust.
talk by @gukslut f s a
Finals week is kicking your ass, thank goodness you have a friend to help you relieve some stress. It’s a great arrangement, as long as no one finds out... as long as you don’t catch feelings. What could go wrong?
somebody to love by @cutechim
kim taehyung wins the heart of everyone he meets, and you—his self-proclaimed work “nemesis”—are not an exception.
tear you apart by @bratkook s
I want to hold you close, soft breasts, beating heart, as I whisper in your ear, ‘I wanna fucking tear you apart.’ demon au
clairevont by @/bratkook f s a ft. jjk
The second year of college starts off with a bang until you find yourself tangled in between your fuck buddy Kim Taehyung and his innocent room mate Jeon Jungkook.
free use by @littlemisskookie f s a
You tell your crush you want him to have full control of you in every way always. He obliges.
lost myth of truelove by @sugalaritae f s a
for six months you wait for him, a weekend spent together, finally able to reach the man your soul is tethered to.
because of you, blue by @ugh-yoongi f s a
nearly a year out from your breakup with taehyung, jin begs you for help saving his failing restaurant. the two of you aren’t exactly friends, but you feel some stupid sense of obligation and, really, what’s the worst that could happen?
true love by @jjkeverlast f s a
in which you're face to face with your ex again after 5 years, because both of your friends start dating each other.
obsidian by @kpopfanfictrash s a
The world of magic is divided into dark and light, witches and warlocks, choice and fate. You’re a prodigy of light, a witch who works within the police force. You’ve heard of Taehyung in passing, spoken in whispers as the warlock of dark who has the world holding it’s breath.  All this changes on the night you’re assigned as security for a mysterious singer named V and you come face to face with Taehyung himself. What happens after that might be fate.
baby, baby by @hobiwonder ft. pjm f s a
When you’ve run out of savings to continue on to the last semester of your Bachelors - you take an unorthodox route. Helping a desperate couple have a child and getting paid for it? Heck yeah. But what do you know - it wasn’t as easy as it sounds.
entangled by @caelesjjk ft. jjk s a
He saved your life twice. But he’s also been your sweet lab partner in college for the past two years and now someone who is more than just a friend. You care about him…maybe even love him. But something tells you that you aren’t quite sure what love even is. How could you when you have feelings for someone else as well. Kim Taehyung is the handsome stranger you’ve seen around campus and somehow ended up dancing with at Club Onyx. You were upset that Jungkook had stood you up once again and Taehyung made you feel like you were on top of the world. What you didn’t know that night, is the dark secret Taehyung is trying desperately to hide, but the closer the two of you get the more difficult that becomes.
buzzed by @junqkook f s a
maybe ordering a vibrator and letting your best friend open your mail wasn’t such a great idea.
queen cobra by @fantasybangtan f s a
when your boss offers the chance to take down the nation’s most lucrative gang from the inside out, you know you’ll do it no matter what the cost… even if that means entering an arranged marriage with the kingpin himself.
pulse by @rohobi f s a
You fell in love with Kim Taehyung during Medical School. Now living totally different lives in completely different hospitals, you're pulled together again as if by fate during a code black when someone plants a bomb in your hospital. 
things we don't say by @wintaerbaer f s a
Three years after graduating college, everything seems to be falling into place for you: stable job, cozy apartment, and a long-term boyfriend with a ring box hidden in his desk drawer. But when a mutual friend makes a remark that your best friend of nearly two decades is clearly in love with you, you realize that life may not be as simple as it seems.
mars by @to-star-lake s a
ahistorical au, military au, yandere!taehyung
satisy by @suga-kookiemonster f s a
 “listen,” taehyung says, eyes wide and eager as he smiles at you. “i figure we can just help each other out. i scratch your back, you scratch mine.” but when you find yourself suddenly in need of a massive favor, exactly how much scratching are you willing to do?
no kisses by @icedmatchatae f s a
It's championship week! The most anticipated week of the school year; however, leading up to the events, you and your council must collaborate with the football team to promote school spirit and pride. Unfortunately, you're forced to work with your number one enemy, Football team captain and fuck boy, Kim Taehyung, known for having a mysterious "no kisses" rule.
beyond desire by @strwberrytae s a
it’s never easy falling for your best friend when you have so much history. it’s especially difficult when you both share the same sexual desires and lifestyle. taehyung is a dominant CEO of a well known company in Seoul and you are an up and coming editor. while both of you come from a troubled and dark past, you lean on each other for support and comfort. what happens as your feelings blossom and grow over the years? what happens when you fear taehyung may be falling in love with someone else? will you confess your feelings or remain in the shadows?
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one-shot
crazy for you by @oddinary4bts f s a
 you’ve known Kim Taehyung your whole life. When you meet again at a party hosted by your best friend, alcohol looses your lips and you spill your secrets to your childhood crush. Will Taehyung give in to your desire, or will you be struck by remorse?
seventeen times 17 by @cutaepatootie f s a
You loved him Seventeen Times 17.
ten out of ten by @shadowkoo f s a
For the past three years, Kim Taehyung has made it his mission to annoy you relentlessly on campus, finding every possible way to drive you up the wall during your shared classes. However, as you both enter your senior year, something strange happens. Taehyung begins to sense a shift in his energy, realizing he might just have some secret feelings for you. What unfolds when you make this earth-shattering discovery too?
under wraps by @jungkxook f s
there’s nothing you and taehyung seem to hate more than each other - except for christmas. having recently been dumped by your (now ex) boyfriend only seems to make this holiday even worse. but when taehyung suggests that you should pretend to be dating each other to save you both the embarrassment, pity, and bothersome questions from family and friends alike for a fun carefree month of celebrations, you can’t possibly say no.
always the bridesmaid by @kookingtae f s a
When you first meet Kim Taehyung, you’re determined to find every reason you can to hate him—or maybe he’s just looking for ways to get on your last nerve. But when a turn of events has the two of you working the wedding of the man you’re hopelessly in love with, you’re too late to realize the real reason to hate Kim Taehyung is because of the latest column he’s secretly writing: “Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride”, and it’s all about you.
any way you want it by @noteguk s
in which your best friend, Taehyung, finds out about your unsatisfying sexual experiences and decides to put an end to that track record himself. 
sharing is caring by @jjkpls f s ft. pjm
Taehyung is taken aback when his soulmate, Jimin, introduces his new girlfriend to him. Jimin tries to help them break the ice.
the end of all things (and the beginning of us) by @/kidguk f s a
the end of the world has come and passed, but there is still much to live for. there’s hope, there’s tomorrow, and there’s that guy you met while scavenging for supplies in an abandoned cinema. turns out he hates being alone, and the feeling is mutual.
aberrant by @kth1 f s
Meeting a handsome and rare fox hybrid was the last thing you had expected in a world of coexisting hybrids. What you also hadn’t expected was how this fox found a liking to you, showed up randomly at places where you were and next thing you knew - you were falling, hard, for the man.
lost in you by @/jjkeverlast f s a
the infamous kim taehyung, campus fuckboy and heartthrob is much more than you thought after an unexpected night.
the dinner date by @diortae f (ao3)
pretending to be on a date with your best friend to get a free meal at the fancy restaurant jeongguk works weekends at doesn’t sound so terrible, all things considered. there’s just one small problem: you’re pretty sure you’re in love with the aforementioned best friend.
until yesterday by @jimlingss f s a
You and Taehyung are hopeless as you are hopeless romantics. But five months after tying the knot and saying "I do", you're hospitalized after a car accident with him. But upon waking up, the doctors tell you that you don't have a husband.
the forsaken by @yoonia s a ft. knj
In order to save your people from the danger of drought and hunger, your father had sent you out on a mission across the ocean to find the heart of nature that could bring back the prosperity which your land had long lost. As the Chief’s daughter, you took the mission as your responsibility, even if you had to let the man that vexes you the most join you in your journey, even if you had to ignore the Elders’ warnings about the dangers and all the vicious monsters lying in wait.
blacklist by @httpjeon f s a ft. jjk
after departing from your dom, you’re assigned to two incredibly powerful men.
1-800-music-street by @/httpjeon f s
↬you’re enchanted by a street performer and then he saves you, resulting in multiple meetings one can only describe as fate.
farner boy i love you by @strawberrynamjoon f s a
↬Needing change in your life you decided it would be a brilliant idea to move to your uncle’s small farm, helping him and your cousin Jimin with the daily work. What you didn’t plan was to fall in love with your beautiful yet very annoying neighbour Taehyung, who seemed to make it his personal mission to tease you every chance he got. And what you expected even less was that he seemed to like you too.
waterloo by @/kinktae f s a
↬Taehyung is a famous but pessimistic art prodigy who doesn't believe in love. You are an art student studying in Paris, who sees the world through rose-colored lens and is a certified cheesy romance film enthusiast. And this is your love story. Or, “Well, it is the city of love. Maybe you just need to fall in love."
get you the moon by @bymoonchild f s a
↬Life has its ways of fucking with you, but you know you’ve hit 50 feet below rock bottom after being tasked to do a profile feature on Kim Taehyung, the varsity football captain, for your school newspaper. Pure torment awaits you, but this is alongside glassy eyes, pink cheeks and conflicted feelings that you’ve never dared to imagine with the likes of the devil incarnate.
fate of the fast & furious by @prolixitae f s
↬you’re a first-generation college student and taehyung is the hot guy with a love for motorbikes who lands the job babysitting for your family while you’re away.
fast & fearless: what comes first by @/prolixitae
↬taehyung is used to earning his keep through illegal street races, and he’s got every reason to win that upcoming promise of prize money for an old friend. but when the odds don’t fall in his favor, he turns to babysitting. enter, you: a first-generation college student with too much to lose to be spending all your time with a troublemaking biker. who also happens to babysit for your kid brother.
cobalt blue by @hobivore s ft. jjk
↬you ask Jungkook to draw you like one of his French girls. 
let it snow by @/suga-kookiemonster f s
↬it all started by accident, but it continues by choice—even before you began sleeping together, things with your friend taehyung have always been comfortable and easy. simple, and this new arrangement between you is certainly no exception to that rule. well...that's definitely what you thought before a major snowstorm traps the two of you in his apartment over the holidays. now? now, it is quickly becoming apparent that things are a bit more complicated than you realized.
muse by @/suga-kookiemonster f s
↬this could finally be tae’s big break, but he’s nervous and struggling to find inspiration. luckily, you’re willing to support him in all ways necessary.
falling, falling gone by @johobi f
↬Taehyung. Captain of the soccer team. Master of your heart. You'll never tell him for fear of rejection. So why the fuck are you about to do it in front of dozens of his peers?
new tricks by @geniuslab f s
↬When your newly adopted puppy turns out to be a lot more work than you expected, a cute dog trainer comes to the rescue. You soon become friends, but you begin to realize friendship might not be all you want.
guns & roses by @chateautae f s
↬he was cold-blooded, stone-faced and ruthless; a formidable force anyone in the criminal underworld sought to destroy. and he didn’t care, so long as it was never you.. anything but you.
saudade by @chateautae f s a
↬a demanding idol lifestyle was something taehyung and yourself were all too familiar with. it wasn’t so hard when considering your unconditional love for one another, but lately, taehyung wasn’t the same anymore; and you decide it's time to find out why.
strands by @xjoonchildx s a
↬taehyung can't figure out how he got separated from his men, or how he ended up stranded in these woods -- hurt. the only thing he knows is that he has no choice but to rely on the beautiful, secretive stranger who's found him.
cheap skate by @/gukslut f s
↬Who doesn’t know Taehyung and his lady? Cutest couple in town, I’d say, and have been since they started dating in their college days. Oh, that was a while ago, though. And still, they’re happy as can be in that place they have together. Almost hate seeing one without the other, y’know, it’s like seeing just one testi- oh, right, I’m not supposed to talk like that. Anyhoo, I only say that because I saw Taehyung at a jewelry store the other day while I was buying my sweet Jiminie his presents. Maybe that boy’s finally gonna pop the question, but I do hope he’s got a good plan for it. Something sweet and romantic. Maybe I’ll find out after Jiminie gets back from that cabin he’s visiting. 
definition of love by @taegularities f s a
↬When the gorgeous student from your literature class starts showing interest in you, you discover that there's much more to him than his know-it-all facade. But is this realization enough to get through your insecurities and secrets?
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↬looking for other kth fics or the other members check out my library for more
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