#i can't do any work like this

[trans-cuchulainn]

wish abled people would understand fluctuating disabilities more. i told my boss my knee was better today than friday and she's like "I'm glad it's slowly getting better" but it's not Getting Better, it's just having a good day (and tbh it's worse now than it was when I said that) and tomorrow it'll probably be unable to bear my weight again. like. stop thinking of these things as a straight line progression because they're not and I'm tired to having to explain every bad day like it's some bigass new problem when it's just. the nature of these things

#i also wish adobe acrobat would stop freezing on me because it's like the whole reason i came in today #bc i dont have acrobat at home #and it's being so shit I can't actually do any work #painblogging #disability

[fleursdesmorts]

every year people get angry when ao3 requests donations but honestly in a world where almost all spaces online are slowly being eaten by corporations which censor the content on those sites, having a fan-run fan-sponsored place where people can create gay art without fear is great

#ao3 #i understand the frustration when donation posts are not getting funding #while ao3 does #but ultimately you can't control how people spend their money and having a space like this for #people to preserve writing even if its silly fanfiction is a good thing #archives are very useful and important and preserving a space of the internet for works created out of joy and passion #is not a bad thing #urging people do donate to any random donation post instead of ao3 is reckless when it's incredibly hard to verify #the source of the donation posts and whether its legit #unless of course you know the person in question

[hedgehog-moss]

One mistake I made a lot when I started learning English was writing both the auxiliary and the main verb in past tense—as in, "Did the rain stopped?" My English teacher had to really drill this grammar point into my head, she was like "the point of 'did' here is to indicate past tense, there's no need for another time marker." Me, genuinely baffled: "Why not?" Teacher: "Think of the 'ed' in 'stopped' as having migrated to the beginning of the sentence and become 'did'. So it's no longer in 'stopped'." Well I was sad to see it go. I pointed out that in French you'd say "The rain (itself) has it stopped?" and 'the rain' feels welcome to stay even though the whole point of the pronoun 'it' should be to replace it in a quicker way. But it would be sad if the noun & its pronoun never got to hang out together so we keep both <3

My teacher had a British look on her face that made my middle-school self wonder if maybe she thought my language wasn't optimally designed, and then she said that in English it would feel clunky to give the same piece of grammatical information twice, and "if you use 'did' then the -ed in 'stopped' doesn't add anything." That just sounded offensive, I mean since when do letters need to add something to a sentence? isn't it enough that they adorn the end of words & frolic with the others in friendship. If it bothers you so much just don't pronounce them. Idk, "did the rain stopped" felt so right to me. In the end my teacher said that "The rain has it stopped?" with the redundant pronoun is the more formal French phrasing anyway, and I was like yeah true we'd rather say "is it that it (itself) has stopped to rain?" and I felt like this really proved my point and I think she felt the same way

#i did the same thing with adjectives... eg my purples socks are warm #i know i know purple doesn't need an -s because socks already has one so it doesn't add any information :( #look i already managed to steel myself and not write ''are warms'' as would feel right #and it's already sad enough to have no way to indicate that socks are girls. give me something #spanish is even worse than english in terms of grammatical emphasis in some ways. it will give you nothing #spanish is like oh my god you don't need a noun NOR pronoun don't act like you can't remember who we were talking about just 1 sentence ago #in spanish the noun and its pronoun get to hang out together on the astral plane they just don't have a lot of work to do

[inkskinned]

it is hard to explain without sounding vain or stupid - but the more attractive others find you, the more you're allowed to do. the easier your life is.

i have been on both sides of this. i am queer and cuban. i grew up poor. for a long time i didn't know "how" to dress - and i still don't. i make my sister pick out any important outfits. i have adhd in spades: i was never "cool and quiet", i was the weird kid who didn't understand how "normal" people behave. i was bullied so hard that the "social outcasts" wouldn't even talk to me.

i got my teeth straightened. i cut my hair and learned how to style it. i got into makeup. it didn't matter, at first, if i actually liked what i was doing - it mattered how people responded to it. like a magic trick; the right dress and winged eyeliner and suddenly i was no longer too weird for all of it. i could wear the ugly pokemon shirt and it was just "ironic" or a "cute interest."

when i am seen as pretty, people listen. they laugh at my jokes. they allow me to be weird and a little spacey. i can trust that if i need something, people will generally help me. privilege suddenly rushes in: pretty does buy things. pretty people get treated more gently.

i am the same ugly little girl, is the thing. still odd. still not-quite-fitting-in. still scrambling. still angry and afraid and full of bad things. of course it became my obsession. of course i stopped eating. i had seen, in real time, the exact way it could change my life - simply always be perfect, and things can be easy. people will "overlook" all the other things. i used to have panic attacks at the idea others would see me without makeup - what would they think? even for a simple friend hangout, i'd spend a few hours getting ready. after all, it seemed so obvious to me: these people liked me because i was pretty.

i worry about how much i'm being a bad activist: i understand that "pretty" is determined by white, het, cis, able-bodied hegemonies. if i was really an ally, wouldn't i rally against all of this? recently there's been a "clean girl" trend which copies latinx aesthetics: dark slicked-back hair, hoop earrings. i almost never wear my hair like that; i can hear the middle school guidance counsellor advising me that i might fare better if i toned it down on the culture.

the problem is that i can take pretty on and off. that i have seen how different my life is on a day where i try and a day where i don't. i told my therapist i want to believe the difference is confidence, but it's not. and when you have seen it, you can't unsee it. it lives inside your brain. it rots there; taunting. i get rewarded for following the rules. i am punished for breaking them. end of story.

pretty people can get what they want. pretty people can feel confident without others asking where they got their nerve from. pretty people can be weird and different. pretty people get to have emotions; it's different when they get aggressive, it's pretty when they cry with frustration.

of course people care about this. of course it has crawled into you. of course you want to be seen as attractive. it's not vanity: it's self-preservation.

#pretty in this post is a stand in for . literally all forms of normativity #warm up #tbd maybe idk #ps! hi!! i'm queer!!!!!!!!! it is how i identify! if you tag this 'q slur' i will fight you!!! #i am using it here in the EXACT way it is NOT a slur !! i am identifying as a queer person! #this is EXACTLY how people reclaim it !!! #it's like practically ACADEMIC in this usage!! #please do any reading into what the fuck the history of the word ''queer'' is before telling me #as someone identifying as queer #that i'm a slur. that the place i find comfort in is a slur #''well it makes me uncomfortable if people use it for me'' #im sorry to hear that dude. that sucks. i hope things get easier for you soon #but you don't get to take it from ME #in case you can't tell by the REST of this piece #i DID hear queer used as slur against me. i DID get bullied with it. i DID hear a lot of shit said #i also heard it about lesbians #about ''being gay'' #about pretty much any fucking term that could describe me. #i like queer. i like how it feels. and it's mine. #you don't get to undo the work i've done personally because it makes u uncomfortable #it's ahistoric to pretend like there are ''safe'' ways to identitfy if ur queer. #none exist. it has never been safe to be like this.

[moraggian]

putting your cold boys into that damned gachapon machine // x

#there are some notes on what i think their hypothetical ability sets would be in the twitter thread linked here #i keep forgetting to post the stuff from my twitter that i actually do like. sorry about that #i do feel distinctly as if i can't post the half of it here because the quality is far too low #but some of the neater pieces work. maybe ill do the da au stuff too #the terror #silna #francis crozier #cornelius hickey #james fitzjames #the only gacha i ever played with any regularity/intent is g enshin so that may be clockable in these splash art thingies. Sorry

[front-facing-pokemon]

#noivern #one of my all-dragon team's staples! thus i have a soft spot for this pokémon. not really for any other reason than that #just a cool badass design. big bat dragon. objectively badass #though i think it should be a dragon/dark type instead of dragon/flying. hydreigon typing #also hi it's me from the future. a few hours before this posts. i just want to complain a little bit #about how fucking difficult this is getting now that i'm getting into alolan forms in the queue #i don't. fucking. know how to use blender. this is kicking my ass. i spent like two hours this morning just trying to get those alolan form #working. and i didn't even successfully do that for two of them #so if you like alolan forms i am Really sorry but they are not gonna be up to par for the production value i have set for myself on this #blog. i've fuckin doomed myself by getting this much of a following and i know i can't get away with the same shit i used to #be able to so like. just fuckin bear with me please it's turning into a whole wreck here in the future in gen 7

[bitchthefuck1]

Tom's line about Shiv being selfish and "find[ing] it very hard to think about me" is actually so telling because while it's absolutely true that she rarely takes his position into consideration, Tom never once thinks about what he can do to help Shiv unless it also benefits him.

Every single time he makes a move or sacrifice that might help her, it's always something that he thinks will give him a leg up. He volunteers to take the fall for cruises, not for Shiv, who is in no way implicated, or even for Waystar, but because he thinks it'll ingratiate him to Logan, and the second it seems like he might have to actually follow through on that, he immediately tries to get out of it and even throws Shiv under the bus. Meanwhile, for all that Shiv disregards his interests, there are a number of things she does that only help him, and she's the one who actually sacrifices something and undermines her position with Logan to beg him not to let Tom go to jail.

It just makes it so clear that no matter how much he might love her (and I think he does, in his own compromised way), for him their relationship was always built on the underlying assumption that it's her job to prop him up, but it's not his job to help her.

#i rewatched that ep a few days ago and this was just cooking in my brain for a bit #their relationship is so messy and interesting i want to watch them get a divorce on a loop forever #and like. the wildest thing is that Tom does occasionally do things that don't serve him to help someone else. but its always greg #which you might say is ultimately down to the power dynamics (shiv can do more for tom than he can for her and tom can do more for greg) #but there are still plenty of points where tom actually does have the power to help shiv and chooses not to #and I love how succession never really has a clear 'what this character is telling you is 100% the truth of the story' moments #anytime a character is making a statement like 'this is who you are/who i am' or 'this is what i really want/what you really want' there's #always some kernel of truth to it but the narrative they're spinning is almost never fully honest #you can't take any of it at face value and it's such a good way of showing how they're always on some level 'playing the game' #and like. at a time when so many stories are basically spoon-feeding their audiences it's so nice to have a story that trusts you to #sort through it all and see what's real and what's not and rewards you for putting that work in #succession #4x07 tailgate #succession season 4 #failmarriage #shiv roy #tomshiv #tom wambsgans #siobhan roy

[obstinaterixatrix]

here are all the recs I posted for femslash february 2024...! each individual rec post can be found in my femslash feb recs tag. I actually thought I wasn't going to be able to do this because work got super chaotic, but in the end I couldn't bear to skip out on a leap year. that's a whole extra day for yuri.

last year I focused on official releases, so this year I wanted to focus on series that aren't technically officially available (plus a french-japanese film). fan translations are always a dicey for artists/translators/publishers/etc because obviously they need to get paid... but yuri's already such an overlooked genre that—in an official capacity—we end up with a couple drops from what's already a pretty small pool. I read hana to hoshi about a decade ago, and I keep submitting it to the seven seas survey for licensure! and yet!! no dice. and even when there are official releases, sometimes they just... disappear!? wish you were gone was licensed and then taken down, so for a while the only way to read it (if you missed out on buying it) was the fan translation. I think it's important to support artists and official releases, and also, to appreciate the thankless endeavor(/crime) of scanlation.

hope yall find something you like!

#femslash february #femslash feb recs #ff recs #recs #rambled a lot for this one lol #but like. yeah. honey & honey is imo a pretty culturally significant work #but I can't see any publishers picking it up for licensure #maybe for a recent autobio manga but certainly not one from 20 years ago #and from a marketing standpoint. it's 'hard' to push yuri as a genre. #bl has an obvious and profitable demographic (women) #m/f has an obvious and profitable demographic (women) #but--if you make a distinction between yuri and H (I do)--yuri doesn't really have an obvious and profitable demographic #so it's a lot harder to pitch yuri... which means it's a lot harder to even introduce yuri to a broader audience... #and thus the cycle continues... #plus there's the whole systemic misogyny embeded into a patriarchal society which devalues stories centered around women etc #anyway the POINT is. commit to yuri duty. be a yuri warrior. write femslash. hype femslash.

[markscherz]

I salivate at the thought of skinning you alive

oh good, I thought I'd been left out. [for context to the reader, this is a reference to this post (I hope)]

On the spectrum from crocodile to passerine, I can only hope that human would be closer to crocodile, but not so close to be quite as tiring.

#I skinned a crocodile recently #actually just part of a crocodile #and it was exhausting #fascinating and extremely cool #but really a lot of work #the osteoderm make the back REALLY inflexible #so pulling it back takes a lot of strength #huge respect to the people who do that for a living #on the other hand #trying to skin a passerine is like trying to hammer in a nail with tissue paper #you just look at the damn thing and the skin rips #I have no idea how people make titmouse taxidermies #I have pretty good fine motor control #but I am not cut out to be a taxidermist #cw skinning #I guess? #let me know if this needs other warnings #I can't think of any right now #tag ramble #answers by Mark #Anon #Anonymous

[quintenrosenburgwrites]

their name is mirren! they're a.... detective maybe?? i mean they say they're a detective but there's no way that's true. they'd probably take at least three hours to realize there's something off about gingi. also they would likely be found in the cinema, after you've wandered around a bunch and some time has passed. there'd be an option to talk to the weirdo standing awkwardly by the popcorn butter station, and they would immediately say something so strange and stupid that the narrator needs a minute to process it

uhhhhhh i doubt many ppl will wanna but if u wanna ask questions (about or to them) feel free to, just make sure to specify that it's for them in the ask. i might do a quick doodle :)

#dialtown #dialtown fanart #dialtown oc #oc #original character #phone head #fanart #i'm surprised that (as far as i can tell) nobody's used one of those cool keyboard phones for an nb dialtown oc yet #like. #how has nobody done that yet #lmk if someone has btw lol #i can't find any #i used to have a keyboard phone that didn't work #id use it as a mini laptop and pretend i was doing business things #id call it tax time #i killed a man in the game one time and i ended up writing a fake confession on my fake laptop to frame my at the time 5 year old brother #i was a very normal child

[fictionadventurer]

What was the point of Scrooge's trip with the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come? On a structural level, it makes sense--three is the fairy tale number, and you can't visit the past and present without also including the future--but on a character level, it doesn't quite seem necessary. Showing a man that he'll die alone, unloved, and unmourned seems like the strategy you take as the last-ditch effort to convince a guy that he needs to change his ways. But that situation doesn't apply to Scrooge. He started softening immediately after he first arrived in his past. By the time he finished with the Ghost of Christmas Present, he was fully onboard with the need to reform, so the Ghost's vision of his future seems like unnecessary cruelty. Why show him all this when he was already planning to change his ways?

A few things come to mind. One is that this vision of the future wouldn't have affected Scrooge unless he had already changed his ways. A cold, hard businessman could have seen his lonely death as just the way of the world, might have viewed the people who stole the clothes from his corpse as just people doing what's practical in this world. He needed to relearn the value of the intangibles--human connection, respect for others--to see the true horror of the lonely death and the vultures who defiled the dead man.

But why the horror? Can't he reform without being threatened with doom? It's possible--but it's also possible such a reform would be temporary. After all, Scrooge started as a friendly, loving young man, but retreated into himself and his business out of fear of poverty and fear of the way the world looks down upon poor people. Even if a reformed Scrooge started on a course of Christmas charity, there was always a chance that the enthusiasm would fade, and the worldly fears would start creeping back in. The only way to beat those fears is to give him something to fear that's even worse than poverty. He needs to see the horrible end that his selfish ways would lead to, so he won't be tempted to slide back into them.

There's also the fact that seeing his death makes him ecstatically happy to find that he's alive after the Ghost is gone. Had Scrooge been spared the vision of his future, he might have been happy to find himself on Christmas Day, but his joy would have been nowhere near the manic glee he experiences after coming back from the future. Now, he doesn't just get a new start--he gets a second chance. Coming back from his own grave makes him mindful of his death, but it also makes him hyperaware of the fact that he's still alive. He isn't in the ground yet. He still has time to do good and make connections with others so he doesn't die alone.

Seeing the past reminded him of the innocence he'd lost. Seeing the present reminded him of the people whose lives he was missing out on. Seeing the future reminded him that death is waiting, so it's important to live virtuously while we can. All three are important because all three brought him outside of himself and taught him to value the wider world, just in time to live through another Christmas Day.

#a christmas carol #charles dickens #once again i've ponderously worked my way to the explicitly stated moral of the story #but i had to work my way there because stave 4 left me unsettled #had i been scrooge that trip probably would have squashed any desire i had to reform #the ghost *doesn't say* whether or not the future can be changed #what if this is just proof he's doomed no matter what so why bother changing? #fortunately scrooge was much better than i was about logic #namely: no reason to show him this future if it *can't* be changed #the point of these ghosts is to save him from marley's fate #plus we did have the ghost of christmas present's implications that future shadows can be changed #it's kind of interesting when you step back from familiar stories that just go this way because it's how they're supposed to go #and really dig into 'wait a minute. why did it go like this?' #it usually winds up with me figuring out that the writer knew what they were doing #but it's also nice to see the scaffolding that got us to the story

[captain-astors]

Creature. (The rendered ones are referenced from manga panels)

#mediocre art #tokyo ghoul #On some level I think I should like Kaneki more than I do but there's this weird sense of detachment #I have not only from him but being able to perceive him as a character? #I don't even dislike him it's just that I can't feel any which way about him at all. He's a catalyst for events #feels more like the conch from Lord of the Flies or something rather than a fictional person. #He doesn't suffer and learn from the consequences #he just suffers and does what got him there again. It's arguable that the lack of punishment denies him the satisfaction #but if that's the case why does he end the story with everything working out perfectly for him? #Why do his friends oblige his flaws and accept his lack of change? #Is the problem my lack of understanding or his lack of good writing? #Is he well written? #Why do I like a certain character from a different anime who's a very similar person with very similar dynamics #but with a goal and acceptance by himself and those around him that his actions really are reprehensible and cannot truly be atoned for #not only more but to the point that he's actually one of my favorites? #Am I just sitting upon a throne of entitlement #because his thought process and experiences are not catered to be applicable to and understood by myself? #GOD IF I KNOW ANYMORE #I'm not pressuring myself to like him or anything I just don't understand anything about kaneki these days and I don't know why

[kirby-the-gorb]

#kirby #daily kirby #my art #digital #hal laboratory #nintendo #so like aliexpress used to have a terrible reputation in terms of like quality and truth in advertising and such right #but like. amazon and etsy are swamped with bootleggers and dropshippers now too #so I figured like. can't be any worse right? #besides I know how to double check descriptions and measurements and examine images critically #I've shopped shady sites before like back when banggood was the only place to get those cute diy miniature kits #(now you can get them at regular craft store chains which is Wild to me) #but I have never opened aliexpress because everyone was always just like 'Never Go There' #(but then again these days folks are doing massive temu hauls left and right) #(so clearly norms have changed even if common perception of aliexpress has not) #I open it up and I immediately find the rug I spent an entire day hunting for unsuccessfully earlier in the month. #and a ton of incredible bootleg kirbs. #and a style of hair clip I've been hunting for for *years*. #soooo I spent the entire day in a pastel fugue lol #(I have not spent any money yet but I'm probably gonna) #(so like I can't confirm that you're not gonna get scammed or whatever just like. use common sense.) #(don't trust sale prices read descriptions/reviews when available and try to avoid work stolen from independent artists) #(that's usually gonna be on printed stuff like phone cases and posters) #(and tbh I have no qualms with stolen official art as long as the quality is as advertised) #(but there's a big difference between stealing from Multinational Corporation and stealing from Some Guy) #anyway done rambling now <3

[africanamermaid]

Not me as somebody who crochets on the reg getting criticisms/unwanted comments about everything I make:

"You always use the same colors" :/

Me: can't help it I'm a thalassophile and therefore I must always use beige, khaki, turquoise, teal, aqua blues, whites of all shades. Let the coastal creations commence!

"Nice bag. You know, that looks perfect to use only for holidays like Easter"

Me: ...my coastal bag is to be used every time I feel like it. What are you talking about.

"Those oceanic colors don't match with your current outfit so don't use it."

Me: it's not about what looks nice TO YOU but what feels right and fun to use FOR ME.

"Why don't you add (whatever) to your creation. It'd look great if you add (whatever). And, how about next time, you actually use a leather bag bottom instead?"

Me: I don't want to.

"You sure can't take a comment or a slight criticism. Why are you like this?" :/

Me: you sure can't mind your business.

"Why are you doing 2 projects at once. Finish one and start the other I don't get it."

Me: oh you sweet summer child ohohoho...you just don't understand the mind of a crocheter do ya?

"You know, if you make something for somebody it sure won't be coastal themed or whatever. You have to try something different."

Me: who said I'm making anyone ANYTHING? They don't want to pay the correct price for a hand-made creation so that won't be happening. Anyway, ONTO THE COASTAL THEMED SCARF!

#crochet #crocheting #knitting #knit #fiber art #fiber arts #yarn #yarn crafts #yarnlove #crochet art #usually those criticisms and comments come from my mother #lol #other people in public while I'm working are shocked that people still crochet #they're all OMG THAT'S A LOST ART EVERYBODY LOOK #mom on the other hand is all wow can't you try to idk do something else like use more pinks and purples #or my favorite: when are you gonna finish your last project #my mom even got mad at me once at one of my projects and said I didn't raise a daughter to look like a clown so #don't make things that won't match with your wardrobe #🤪🤪🤪🤪 #family members get weird when they notice your hobbies #btw my mom doesn't have hobbies #she says she doesn't need any #she says Jesus is her hobby #that's fine but Jesus was a carpenter you know #Our Lord and Savior DID stuff on the side y'know 😂

[ink-asunder]

"You're being entitled!" These bitches are asking us to fund their Hollywood-quality content dreams like Walt Disney pleading a bank he was in debt to to give him another loan to finish Bambi, a movie that did not see any monetary success until it rereleased seven years later. I have to pay so much big money in medical expenses every month that I don't have any "treats" (a starbucks coffee, a different subscription, etc) I can go without. I'm not the entitled one here.

#also i'm not 'acting entitled to their free content' if i don't even want the content to begin with 🤭 #watcher #my last post blew up. rip. take me dogs. #also in terms of content creation in general: i do not believe i am entitled to free work of any kind from any artist #however if you post it online for free then the transactional contract has been fulfilled. #if you want comments go back to the 'i'm not gonna post another chapter until i get 5 comments' business model #and like the most frustrating thing is!! I can't subscribe to Anything with money!! #I use my grandparents' passwords. I beg them to add a new channel on the roku if i want it. #i can't tip most online creators because i couldn't make a money mover account before i filed for disability. #i cannot support So Many independent artists and just people selling things to get by even though i want to so badly. #but people are getting divisive over funding an already established and successful entertainment project. #i'm just sick with it tonight.

[thelaurenshippen]

HI HELLO DO YOU LIKE AUDIO DRAMAS, WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE YOUR OWN AUDIO DRAMA well do I have news for you

for quite some time, I have been working on putting every bit of practical information I have about making a podcast into some kind of readable resource and I'm very happy to say that, by george, I think I've done it.

that link will take you to our resource page which has links to a 35-page handbook that takes you through every step of podcast production (on our merch page, but you can download for zero dollars! do it!) and a direct download of a 15-page pdf about how I take an idea from development through scripting.

this is by no means the be-all-end-all definitive correct guide on how to make an audio drama. as I emphasize many times throughout, this is just how I do things, but it's a pretty thorough rundown of how I do things. if you've been too overwhelmed to start your own show, I sincerely hope this helps you!

#audio drama #podcasting #indie podcasts #lauren shippen #atypical artists #free resources #writing #I'm gonna be honest you guys #I'm...pretty fucking proud of this thing #it's 50 pages of - what I think is - pretty practical advice and genuinely helpful tips #I really believe in keeping AD a place where indie shows can thrive and anyone can try their hand at production #which is why I've spent so much of my own money through the years making other ppl's indie shows #and I can't really do that anymore financially #but I still believe in the spirit of that #and I think this is a nice way to keep that alive #anyway! I hope you like it and find is useful! #and obviously if you are so inclined #you can also pay any amount of money to download the pdf #it was a BONKERS amount of work #so that's always appreciated!