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link-lonk · 15 days

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I think Madoka Magica should've let us see more of the trauma that Homura experienced after watching the only person she cared about die over and over. I want to watch as Homura's memories of every timeline and every Madoka start to blend together. Which Madoka was the real one? The original? Was it the one that saved the cat from getting hit by car or the one who saved the cat from getting hit by a bike? I want to watch as Homura struggles to remember which Madoka was HER Madoka.

#radiostatic.txt #I am genuinely fascinated by how Homura was able to stay sane throughout all of her timeloops #like we see her become cool homura and put up that facade to protect herself. to keep herself from getting too close to Madoka.#I love the moments in the series when we get to see that facade crack.#because the real Homura is a scared teenage girl who has given up her life to pursue a hopeless cause. but she can't stop trying #because she made a promise to her only friend in the entire world that she would save her. so she has to keep going #Homura Akemi has nothing wrong ever in her entire life #pmmm #puella magi madoka magica #homura akemi #I have more I could say about this but idk how coherent it would end up being

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petr1kov · 7 months

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My ideal Petrigrof endgame would be kind of like the Bubbline route taken in Obsidian: together again, just working through their shit together with to to grow

yeah tbh i did wish they were given room to work things out in their relationship in a relatively normal, non-catastrophic way. i mean, they obviously had their issues, mainly due to miscommunication, but i still stand by the fact that what truly ruined their lives were situations that were outside their control (simon getting cursed and the apocalypse happening). for all that they were/are obsessed with each other or whatever, we can't really ignore the fact that 'letting go' of one another means, on their case, moving on with their lives while knowing that their partner is suffering under a magical curse, like, right now, at this exact moment. i'd say it's a bit hard to just shrug that off, so it's no wonder that they were never able to 'get over' each other

#ask #fionna and cake #at #petrigrof #like we can't ignore the setting when we're discussing their relationship tbh and the setting completely fucked them over #simon's curse is entirely due to bad circumstances while betty had some agency on her downfall #still though betty's actions were more reactions to a bad situation than anything else #like i'm sorry but if the love of my life told me that he wanted to die instead of staying cursed forever #and the only reason they stayed alive and cursed was because i made him do it and promised i'd save him #and then everyone kept saying i should just give up and accept him the way he is now because that's better and healthier #well. i would've turned into the joker too

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adastra121 · 1 month

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The Ones That Got Away (Touchstarved OC Rewrite)

I changed the lyrics to “The One That Got Away” by Katy Perry (I listened to this cover by Brielle Von Hugel), based on my Hound!MC Alon's backstory and their childhood friend's betrayal.

Summer in the city where we grew up. Running from our troubles and tryin’ our luck, Searching for a world that’d be big enough for two. Used to steal Headmaster’s liquor and climb to the roof. Dreamed about the future like we had a clue. Never thought that one day, I'd be losing you.

In another life, I’d still be your friend. We'd keep all those promises, be us until the end. In another life, you would make me stay, So I don't have to say you were the one that got away, The one that got away.

One night on that rooftop, we’d made our pact To leave these walls together, have each other’s backs. Sometimes when I miss you, I climb towards the sky. Summer kept on passing, and we grew up, Found something in the city much bigger than us. It’s time to face the music, we had long run out of luck.

But in another life, you’d be by my side. We'd keep all those promises to take charge of our lives. In another life, I would fight to stay, So I don't have to say you were the one that got away, The one that got away.

The one that got away.

All that money won’t buy back our time for me. Can't replace you with a million dreams. I never thought you’d turn our dream on me. So I guess this is goodbye.

But in another life, I could still believe That friends would keep their promises… In another life, we’d make our escape, And everyone who stayed would say we were the ones that got away.

The ones that got away…

In another life, I would make you stay So I don't have to say you were the one that got away. The one that got away…

#touchstarved #touchstarved game #touchstarved oc #alon the hound #erick the wolf #song parody #lyrics rewrite #the word “dream” is used a bunch because it's not just the childhood friend they lost in the betrayal it's also their shared dream.#the word “luck” is also repeated because of the childhood friend oc erick. he likes card games and gambling.#“we had long run out of luck.” referring to the heist that was the catalyst for the betrayal.#I changed the bridge lyric to “I can't replace you with a million dreams” for one of the songs I had in their playlist. “a million dreams.”#the “turn our dream on me” refers to the promise to leave the city. so alon did actually end up fulfilling that dream thanks to erick.#via exile. we love irony.#I liked playing with the phrase “the one that got away” because it can mean a lost chance #but since the hound mc is a thief it could also mean the person that escaped. like oh no the criminal got away!#with alon and erick in particular it refers to their promise to leave the walled city together once they gathered enough coin #that was also tied to finding a cure for alon's curse but the most important part of that pact was to be together no matter what happened #for the bridge after the chorus I just took out the second part of “we would keep our promises” because I thought it was more fitting #the sentence just ends because it's too painful to repeat. I also think it makes that quieter more subdued part stand out from the others.#my favourite change was the switch to plural in “everyone who stayed would say we were the ones that got away.”#it's meant to convey: “we were supposed to be the ones that made it out. we were supposed to make it out of here together.”#again it's playing with that phrase: “the one that got away.” I imagine it sung in a very raw and agonized way.

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60inchyugiohheadcanons · 6 months

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On Jōnouchi's ADHD (1.39k words)

This headcanon is probably the longest on this blog; it's some compiled thoughts on how growing up with (undiagnosed) ADHD has affected Jōnouchi. It's halfway between headcanon and fanfiction piece, and was requested by @bloodyscott, whom I kept waiting for too long for a response. I apologise sincerely for the delay.

This headcanon begins below the cut, as it's obscenely long. You may find it more comfortable to read this from the blog page, or on Archive of Our Own (NOTE: tumblr is acting strange. To access the page, copy the link and manually remove the href.li portion and the second https), rather than on your dashboard/search, in terms of formatting and such.

From infancy, Jōnouchi wailed his way out of his crib, out of his room, out of his house—as a baby, he thrashed towards whatever freedom he could find. He loathed the four walls of the crib; he'd scarce room to move. A skin infection brought him, aged 4, to hospital, and the very sight of overrun grey plastic seats and skinny cubicles exhausted him more than his illness had ever threatened to.

In primary school, others’ desks would blend together in a whir. Here he was, stuck, dizzyingly sedentary—the longer he sat, the foggier the world seemed to grow. When he kicked and whined at other children throughout electric lunch breaks, and they shrank from his vitality, he learned to eat alone. As his peers trudged from class in packs, watching the pavement, he sat, sullen, as his father drove him home. Somehow, Katsuhiro had never trusted him not to lose himself in chasing his surrounds. The fabric of the car seat would bite into his shorts, and he’d squirm for the window, squealing towards the noise outside: Birds that cawed; scraps of paper that fluttered and choked on smog. That was a fragile era, when his mother still waited, with dry hands and chipped nails, at home. When his father already stank of beer, but still spoke loudly, deeply, boisterously. Again and again, Jōnouchi’s mother would sit her son down, and write his name, stroke by agonising stroke. She’d recite each mora in time with each character. Yet sound would cluster through his head, and his own name would dissolve amid his mother’s instructions, amid the blaze of sunlight trapped on the windowsill behind her. He would write, and the strokes would come out rushed, mis-ordered, lopsided.

Iro wa nioedo

chirinuru wo.

At 10, his father grew quiet, and his mother yet quieter. Silence took up like a plague in Jōnouchi’s head, and swarmed in shapeless formation throughout parched mathematics lessons. Times tables hurled themselves headlong into a skull full of fog, and burst on contact. Are you listening? a teacher asked. How could he listen with a head full of noise, of unspoken words billowing back and forth? He gripped his seat, and glared back. Why should I care, anyway?

When his mother left, his father stopped caring to chaperone him. It had taken Jōnouchi a decade to earn the right to shed his infancy. He resented that it had been this long, so tried to join the huddle of middle schoolers. He told odd stories, and took off, queasy, in front of them. They withdrew their smiles when he approached on the second day. He growled his plaint, and resentment drove him to take the opposite route. He explored back alleys, wallflower convenience stores and dilapidated cinemas; the faster he walked, the more clearly he could see each brick, and the brighter each fleck in the pavement glinted. At speed, he delayed the journey home, and set his eyes on a gorgeous early winter sunset. The colours bellowed, too bold for winter, ungainly and vain. They were glorious.

Jōnouchi came home late. His father glared; fog crashed back down on his shoulders.

Wa ga yo tare zo

tsune naran?

A week before she cleared out too few of Katsuhiro’s belongings and packed too few suitcases, Jōnouchi’s mother drove both children two miles to the optometrist. My son, she explained, reads slowly, yet resents reading; it seems he can’t see very well. My daughter’s sight seems clearer, yet she complains of pain. The optometrist forced Jōnouchi to read down a chart of letters; he fidgeted, and, consumed in memories of a lonely lunch break the day prior, passed with flying colours. When the optometrist flashed a light to photograph his eyes, whatever hideous miracle that was, Jōnouchi screamed.

Katsuya Jōnouchi, the optometrist surmised, had perfect acuity of sight. He sought attention, stimulation. Meanwhile, Shizuka Jōnouchi, who had sat entirely still throughout her examination, had more ragged, derelict peripheral vision than her family had anticipated. Untreated, both your children will get much worse.

And in the months after Shizuka Jōnouchi became Shizuka Kawai and Mrs. Jōnouchi became That Bitch Who Never Cared, Katsuya Jōnouchi became horribly aware of how little time he had to be lethargic. He had to survive this schism; yet as he was, he barely felt capable of thinking. He walked, fidgeted, paced to prove to himself that he was a moving, breathing organism. Yet his father’s frustration would brook no exuberance. Long before Katsuhiro fully committed to flinging glass and spurning his son’s misery, Jōnouchi began learning to move silently, slowly, around his father. He memorised which mats snapped and snagged, which bits of fabric hissed when stepped on. He noted which windows opened most quietly. And yet he never managed a perfect, quiet exit. He couldn’t help but be conspicuous; he could only hope to get out too quickly for his father to react. And, to lift the torpor that followed escape, he would run to school, and, after, run back. Never did the sun shine brighter than when he was moving.

Uwi no okuyama

kyou koete.

When he met Hirutani, did he become more violent? No; every punch he threw during his delinquency had waited, kinetic and desperate, for days, months, years. In classrooms, his sole responses to being ordered around had been sullen deference, with sullenness being his sole demonstration of rebellion. Now, threatened with the obsolescence of his ego, of his perceived freedom, he chained himself to violence, over and over. The first time he punched a man in the gut, he found himself shaking. And rather than sink into sallow, domestic remorse, he slathered himself in white rage. And he went back and he went back and he went back, helpless to his own instincts, trying to dredge the noise in his skull out through his fists. No matter how many punches he threw, and no matter how many he received, he could not stop his head from blazing anew the moment he walked away.

Did Duel Monsters afford him any peace? He would be no man’s losing dog; nor would he be confined to dull celebrity. To play as a strategist consigned him to sitting still, committing himself to gambits he could never entirely trust, to moves that demanded a clear head. To play too whimsically would doom him to inferiority. Thus, he gave half his heart to diligence, and half to sheer fortune. Nobody could idolise his kind of folly, nor devalue his kind of skill. This was Jōnouchi’s will—to eschew having to wait in the mire of expectation; to escape the fog of obligation to anyone’s morals but his own. Honour suited him, so long as it was on his meticulous terms. In games of Duel Monsters, he became a knight-errant of sorts: predictably unpredictable, unexpectedly canny, blindly faithful. With this relationship to his own fate laid out so, he could finally draw cards without fearing those next to come. And thus, hyperkinetic, he found a peace in the game. So he played and played until he forgot how long he’d been playing, and Duel Monsters became as second nature.

Asaki yume miji

ei mo suzu.

Two weeks before Jōnouchi’s graduation, Shizuka invited him to her place to dine. Their father was not to join them. Jōnouchi protested, and his desperation died in a pinprick throat. Wisteria spilled itself over the footpath. Each step threatened to plunge, vertiginous, to the ground.

When Jōnouchi saw his mother, his throat turned to sandpaper. She looked so old.

You cried so much as a baby, she told him. Kicked and screamed to see the world. You weren’t comfortable waiting in your crib—I’d end up coming to you at 4AM, walking you around the perimeter of the house till my heels burned. And you seemed so afraid of all the noises of the night—groaning engines, singing birds. Now, look at you—you’ve grown up so terribly fast.

Could he afford to tell her how even now, he bit down the urge to kick and scream, to launch himself, all fists and sparks, onto his tormentors? No; so, all night, he gripped his glass as tight as he could. The cold lingered and itched on his palms for days. Holding onto things, it seemed, was not so difficult as he’d once believed.

#couple of notes: i tried to write jōnouchi as also possibly having some form of conduct disorder that did not progress to aspd.#as i have neither conduct disorder nor aspd – i can't promise it's entirely accurate #and i apologise sincerely for any serious mistakes. i've tried to avoid stigma but i know i've a hell of a lot more learning to do #jōnouchi is meant to have combined-type adhd here. i have adhd but no diagnosed subtype #however i'd generally say i have an extremely different experience to jōnouchi here. (i'm either hyperactive or combined)#i've tried to stay away from stereotype while also focussing on how a young child might be both overtly and internally hyperactive #and how the display of symptoms might change with circumstance.#moreover; shizuka's eye condition in the anime is left vague and (probably unrealistically) curable #i went with some kind of glaucoma (probably open-angle but i really don't know enough to say).#she probably stopped losing vision after surgery but i doubt she actually got her peripheral vision back #the japanese poem interspersed throughout is the iroha. it was more significant to early drafts and i'm too sentimental to take it out.#i named jōnouchi's father katsuhiro (克弘) because calling him 'jōnouchi's father' got too cumbersome #i didn't really show jonouchi hyperfocussing much or write about his experience of time.#but since he's an esfp i probably need more time to work out how Se dominance could interact with time blindness #anyway. i'll shut up now.#yugioh #yu-gi-oh!#YGO #Yu-Gi-Oh #yu gi oh #katsuya jonouchi #katsuya jounouchi #jounouchi katsuya #jonouchi katsuya #shizuka jonouchi #shizuka jounouchi #jonouchi #城之内克也 #tw domestic violence #cw domestic violence

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patrice-bergerons · 2 years

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Want to write a fic in which Q has a breakdown of a sort and shows up at Bond's door in Jamaica. In years of their acquaintance, he has never asked Bond for anything and Bond owes him this much, he thinks. A break. A break from his life and responsibilities and a chance to collect himself before he becomes a real person again. (That's a decent ex post justification at either rate never mind that in his anguish all he could think to do was to go find Bond.)

And he regrets it immediately the second Bond shows up, tries to leave. But Bond stops him, because he may be too much of a headstrong ass to do anything about it but he has been living in a purgatory of his own making, drifting, and seeing Q here after all these years- it's a reprieve for him as well. Bond knows better than to ask questions too once he ascertains that Q is not there in business.

And the fic is just them spending a week together. A week of sailing and long walks on the beach, lots of sex (naturally), dinners they make followed by drinks in the town. Late night conversations. Do you remember when's. But those carefully steer clear of the old hurts that linger, of the Aston Martin and Madeleine and the zero postcards Bond sent. A question, unvoiced, of what they could have had in a different life. Of regrets that are too late to remedy now.

(OR ARE THEY???)

#00q #fic ideas #i haven't given yall any trademark alex existential longing and loss fics #that should be remedied #also then one night bond wakes up to find q finishing packing #and q says there was no need to drag out the goodbye #this was always meant to be a brief interlude. thank you for being such a generous host.#bc you know bond will never come back to london and q can hardly leave his life behind #and he leaves with a promise he doesn't think they will keep for a second to stay in touch #and it seems as if all hope is lost #until a couple of days later bond shows up at HIS door this time #god- looking actually scared but a bit hopeful too #and says i can't change the past and you have every right to tell me to fuck off #and i will never bother you again #but #I'd love to be a part of your life if you will have me #in everythint that entails #i don't want to waste any more time q #and then q throws his arms around him hehehe

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uselessnbee · 2 years

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"i want a soft byler confession" this and "i want a high stakes byler confession when they think they won't see each other again" that

well what if it's both? what if Mike gets cursed like Max did? what if Will finds out and confesses because why is Mike taking it so calmly? why is he so calm knowing he's about to die? so in a desperate moment they have the softest most heart wrenching confession and you know what? fuck this. fuck what everyone thinks. fuck that the society makes everyone think it's wrong. we only have few last days together so let's make the most of it. if these are my last days alive then i'm going to spend them being the happiest man alive because i'm loved by Will fucking Byers.

#byler #mike wheeler #will byers #imagine #you find out the love of your life is about to die and he's just so calm and you know what you don't care anymore #you've been holding in those feelings for too long and maybe you will lose him now but you're losing him anyways so what does it matter?#if there's any chance if there's anything you can say to make it better to make him fight it #if there's anything you can say or do so he won't just give up and accept death so he will let you save him you will do it and #please i can't lose you i can't #please don't leave me please stay please don't give up please no i won't just move on i won't be able to move on how could i be without you #please i need you alive so please don't push me away please let me help please let me save you #and if i can't then well we promised to go crazy together so let's go crazy together #you are not alone i'm here let me be here for you like you've always been there for me we're doing this together

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quaranmine · 3 months

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Book Reviews with Quara

Since I keep talking about audiobooks, now I want to do a sort of mini book review of the books I've read since starting to "seriously" pick up reading again last year. Also I just like typing about things. I'm skipping Fire Season by Philip Connors and Last Chance to See by Douglas Adams because I've spoken about them already. Keep in mind I am not super-super critical of reading material; generally if I enjoyed it I'm giving 5 stars. If I disliked it though I get a lot more critical because then I want to start analyzing what didn't work for me. Now go forth and learn about what my reading taste is when I'm not reading/writing angsty mcyt fanfic!

Books I loved, aka 5 stars:

Cold Storage by David Koepp

This was the first book I checked out from Libby and it was a banger. I am still trying to replicate that high tbh. When I gave my mom access to my library card in Libby (her rural library has nothing and my city library has everything) I made her check it out too. The narration on the audiobook is fantastic. My mom raved about the narration and basically says she doesn't want to check anything out that wasn't as good--regularly her reviews to me are "good narrator, not as good as that Cold Storage book" lmao. You may know David Koepp as the guy who wrote the Jurassic Park screenplay. This is his first novel.

It's about a mutated fungus that is a sci-fi version of the very real Ophiocordyceps unilateralis, which is more commonly known as the zombie-ant fungus. In this book, a version of Cordyceps can infect all lifeforms, including humans, and has been locked away deep in a former US military vault that has since been sold and converted into an underground storage facility. The plot follows two unlikely protags who work in the storage facility, as well as the two retired military people who are the only ones to have seen the fungi in action, as they try to prevent it from being released into the world. It's funny, horrifying, and gory.

They are making a movie of this book. The release date is tentatively 2024, but I worry about it because I have heard so little news on it. They did do filming though. I have high hopes because they cast Joe Keery as a main character, which I think is perfect casting for the guy in question. I have low hopes because they cast Liam Neeson, a white man, as a character who was originally Hispanic and (as I just noticed while writing this) changed the character's name to be more white. Ugh. Who is Robert Quinn and what did you do with Roberto Diaz???????

Dark Matter by Blake Crouch

What if you got kidnapped and woke up in a parallel world where everybody knew who you were, but they think you're someone else? What if you're just a quantum physics professor, but this other version of you is a successful theoretical researcher? What if your wife never married you in this universe, and your son was never born? How do you get back home? This book is constantly pulling out interesting new questions, twists, and places to explore. Also I liked that while it does feature romance pretty prominently, it's about a guy who just really loves his wife of 15 years and wants to see her again. I just like it when men love their wives.

Also, a fair amount of Goodreads reviews poke fun at this author for having way too much fun hitting the enter key on his keyboard, but since I listened to the audiobook I never had to deal with any annoying formatting choices lol

I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy

I feel like we all know about this one already, tbh. If you don't, heavy tw for child abuse and eating disorders. Tread carefully. It's worth it though if you are confident you won't get triggered. If you haven't read it I recommend the audiobook specifically because Jennette narrates it herself and that gives the book so much extra. It was a 6 hour audiobook and I was gripped by it all day.

Wrong Place Wrong Time by Gillian McAllister

BACKWARDS TIMELOOP BABEYY!!! This one was great. It's about a Mom who witnesses her teenage son kill a man. Every day she wakes up in the past again until she can solve why this happened, the mystery leading up to it that entangles her family, and try to prevent it. First she ways up the day before, then two days, then three, then a two weeks, then a few months, then a few years--until her son hasn't even been born yet. I enjoyed it. Also a plus for British accent narrator (can you tell I'm American....)

A Rip Through Time by Kelley Armstrong

This one was fun. I checked it out because it was longish and I had to drive like 8 hrs roundtrip for a work trip, so I listened to this the entire way. It's about a (Canadian) woman named Mallory who was a police detective in the modern day, who gets attacked while out for a jog in Edinburgh, Scotland. The attacker strangles her and she goes unconscious. When she wakes up, however, she finds herself in someone else's body--in the Victorian era. She's now a 19 year old housemaid, and has to adapt as quickly as possible to avoid suspicion. She quickly finds out that she works for a man named Dr. Duncan Gray, who is a medical examiner. And there's a person who's been murdered in a very similar way to how Mallory herself was attacked. And she's quickly finding out that the person who's body she's in was not well-liked.

My favorite part about this one is the emphasis it has on early forensics in Victorian Scotland. Dr. Gray is a fantastic character and it is so interesting to see him doing his lil cutting-edge forensics research (which Mallory, being educated in modern times, wants desperately to help him with.) Also the narrator, while being Canadian, does Scottish accents for all the Scottish characters. I'm not the best person to ask as someone who isn't Scottish but I thought the accents sounded pretty good lol

Everyone in My Family Has Killed Someone by Benjamin Stevenson

My mom recommended this one to me. It's also a lot of fun. The title is, mostly, accurate. Ernest Cunningham (protag) is a writer, who mostly creates how-to books for mystery novelists he sells on Amazon. No, he doesn't write mysteries, he just writes the how-to books. But he's very well-versed in the "rules" of how to write a classic mystery! He promises that, as the narrator of this story, he will always be an entirely reliable narrator. The book itself is obviously fiction but within the narrative of the book, it is being told like a nonfiction account of something that the main character is writing down. This book is sort of a bottle mystery--strange murders while everyone is snowed in at a ski resort during a family reunion, anyone? The main character is funny and breaks the fourth wall often. I am convinced that there is a separate audiobook specific version since the narration within the book references it being an audiobook. The main character will be like "so, you probably realize this isn't the real killer, since we still have 4 hours of the book left to listen to" lol. I almost want to check out a print copy of this to see if the text is different.

Starter Villain by John Scalzi

First one on the list that I didn't listen to as an audiobook. Honestly, I probably read this book in 4 hours flat. Three of those hours just dead-focused while on a plane (with the book's hold expiring as soon as I landed and took my phone off airplane mode.)

I don't really know how to explain this one. I don't think I understood what it was about until I actually got like 4 chapters in and then I couldn't stop. It's just off-the wall ridiculous. There are talking cats. There are dolphins that want to unionize. There is a volcano lair. There are explosions and assasination attempts. There is a reasonably bleakly accurate capitalist picture of what "villainy" means in our world. There is a poor main character in over his head as he learns he's inherited all this from an uncle he never saw. This book is like...satire comedy. Comedy and outlandish but you're also depressed about billionaires a little while reading it.

Books I thought were Okay (3-4 stars but actually I gave both these 4 stars I think)

The Poisoner's Ring by Kelley Armstrong

The second book to the book I mentioned above. Honestly, I remember very well what the first book was about (i typed the summary by memory) but I have trouble remembering specifics about this one. It's a bit too long as well, at 14 hours. I don't have anything bad to say about it, I just didn't enjoy it quite as much as the first one.

But honestly I do remember it was still a good time. I just really like Dr Gray as a character and the setting, early forensic science focus, etc. These books are also setting up to be an EXTREME slow burn romance between Gray and Mallory, which I don't mind. (Literally by book 2 the most we have is that she thinks he's attractive, so at this rate it will take us 3 more books to get anywhere lol.) I will be checking out the 3rd book when it is released this spring.

Someone Else's Shoes by Jojo Moines

Also a book that suffered from being too long. It's a 12 hour audiobook but I think that it could have been 8 or 9 hours and gotten the same point across. My mom recommended this to me. It's narrated by Daisy Ridley, who does a good job. I enjoyed it, but I also started to feel like I really wanted it to be done?

Also unsure how to describe this one. Slightly-contrived-but-cute plot about how a bag switch up in a gym connects two women's stories. One is a, frankly quite annoying, American woman who married rich but has now been completely cut off from her money (and even passport) by her ex-husband who's cheating on her with a younger woman. One is a British woman with low self-esteem and a bad job who is struggling to keep her family afloat while her husband suffers from severe depression. I think my favorite was a side character named Jasmine who brought light to every scene imo.

Books I disliked (2 stars but after writing this review I almost want to make it 1 star)

Aurora by David Koepp

David I really believed in you after Cold Storage. But imo, this book isn't it. It throws away every interesting part of its apocalypse-level plot to focus on the characters. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love a good character-focused plot, except I never connected with anyone in the book. I just kind of didn't enjoy any of them. This is a story that is supposed to be about a solar flare taking out all electricity and communications for most of the world. And it only covers like a few days after the disaster AND THEN TIME SKIPS LIKE 8 MONTHS UNTIL EVERYTHING IS HAPPILY SOLVED NEIGHBORHOOD UTOPIA STYLE. I'm sorry????? Assuming I can believe that this little suburban Illinois cul-de-sac has managed to set up subsistence farming in a few months and is living perfectly happily, why would you....not show me how that happened.....

Also the "everything fits together" character moment at the end felt unearned. I was like yeah, okay, I guess this slots together. But the author didn't earn that moment for me. Instead of connecting with the characters and the plot and getting invested I felt like I was just being....told that everything worked out?? Or told that this was an important moment instead of actually Feeling the moment? It's hard to explain but I was like ok great thanks let's all go home now.

Sigh. I just can't get over the whole "throwing away the most interesting part of your setting" part. Again. Why would you spend a significant time setting up the science and how much of a disaster the solar flare is and then not show any of the characters figuring out how to survive it long-term....?

Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt

This book has such a high rating. It's very popular right now. It took me like 12 weeks of waiting for my hold to come up, and that's with the library having 7 copies.

It is, supposedly, about a smart octopus named Marcellus who helps an elderly lady solve the mystery of her son's disappearance at sea when he was a teenager.

In practice, it is about one minute at a time of Marcellus (the best part of the book) and extended sections of characters that I don't care about at all. I assume all the pieces of the story were supposed to come together later, but I was just highly bored. I was so bored that I DNF'd at 25% when my hold was up. I do not care enough to wait weeks to check it out again. Based on the one star reviews I read, the characters I didn't like did not develop into better people later and remained similarly annoying. Now, I don't need characters to be good people of course. But I do expect to be interested in them. I still don't know how the son's disappearance factors in because I felt like I heard barely anything about the supposed main character woman.

I feel vindicated because my coworker also checked out the book and told me a few weeks ago that she was at 50% and there still wasn't anything happening in the plot. I will ask her tomorrow if she finished it or not and if it ever got better.

Write an entire book for Marcellus the octopus and I'll check it out...

Killers of a Certain Age by Deanna Raybourn

This book had so much potential. It's about a group of four women who were formerly assasins but are now retiring at 60. To celebrate retirement, they go on a cruise and then realize that they're the new targets for assasination, presumably because they know too much about the organization that used to employ them.

In execution....very meh. I actually had a Libby glitch on this one, where I think I missed about 1.5 hrs of narration total because the book skipped twice. I have no concept of which parts I missed. What I do know is that, the book was already so cobbled together before the first skip that I didn't realize I had missed anything until the end. Like sure, parts didn't make sense, but I was ready to accept that it was just Like That since the rest of the book was like that. After reading a bunch of reviews of this book I am convinced that there is NO way that all of its flaws can be explained by me missing a small part. After all, I did listen to 8.5 hours of it still.

The characters never felt their age to me. I felt like they either acted like they were 80 or 90, or like they were 20. It just seemed odd to me. The characters also felt very 2D, like the author wrote down three traits per person and called it good. There's a younger woman who appears to know the main character and conveniently helps the group, but I literally never figured out where their relationship originated or how they knew each other. Maybe I missed that too. By the end of the book I still didn't know who anyone was and couldn't remember which person was the main character. The plot jumped around to new locations constantly and often with little transition--this happened even on the parts where I definitely didn't get a skipping glitch. The main villain was a guy I literally had barely heard anything of til that point, although perhaps he came up in the 1.5 hrs I missed. They described the same painting in excruciating detail THREE separate times. It was...too feminist? Feminist in a contrived way where I have to be reminded every 5 minutes the characters are women? Like, I know, I am reading a story about women. Please don't mention it several times a chapter. There are ethical and moral considerations about their profession and chosen organization that never really get given the weight required. There was a love interest for the main character that I hadn't heard of once until he was introduced like an hour from the end--maybe I missed more about him in the parts I skipped? Unknown.

ANNND THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!

#quara talks books #my current book is mr penumbra's 24 hr bookstore by robin sloan and i'm not getting promising vibes from it 30% in #i'm gonna try to finish it but....the mc kind of annoys me #but i could live with that!#what i can't live with is the author's incessant need to talk about google constantly. there's a character who works for google.#does the author have a thing for google....?? why do they wanna **** google's ***** in this random presumably unaffiliated book????#also more product placement vibes like macbooks and kindles coming up a lot #like dude. please. stop. you promised me mysterious bookstore not megacorp tech worship #also the tech talk hasn't aged super well in this book imo #a bit amusing to read about people being very wowed by someone attending a party 'virtually' via webcam #in the post pandemic work from home era of zoom meeetings and teams meetings etc #also getting manic pixie dreamgirl vibes from main love interest #ANYWAY. stay tuned to see if I have to put this book in the middle or bottom tier (it's already missed its chance at 5 stars)

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