#i cant afford to live alone

[tittyinfinity]

"But if we dismantle our government, disabled people will suffer!"

Me, a disabled person: I and many other disabled people are actually currently suffering & dying under our current government

"Shut up and vote blue no matter who"

#.bdo #i know I'm just posting the same shit over and over again but i am ANGRY #i'm already fucked over so hard by the fucking government #you know how many disabled people are forced to live w their abusers bc they cant afford to live alone? #shut the fuck up

[craycraybluejay]

Btw if u steal from the poor, ur going to superhell no matter what 😇 hope that helps

#super hell #next time someone tries to steal from me i am going to fucking smack them with the nearest hard and heavy object #idc if u want it or u think ur just being prankster either. leave MY STUFF ALONE #literally go get a concussion so at least ur too sick to put ur dirty hands on other ppls stuff. #i fucking hate people sometimes #what gives you the right #the audacity #to take what isnt yours and not only that to take it when u likely dont need it from someone who does #ill bash yer fuckin head in if i catch you trying to steal from me DO YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND????? #jfc i wish i lived in a place where i could defend my shit with a gun. none of these bitches trustworthy. fucking thieves #im so angry im so fucking mad im fucking livid #someone let me hit them pretty pls before i decide to break my wall or my hand whichever goes first #and this wall isnt even my fucking wall cuz i cant afford that either #but oh noooo u dont feel like doing ur job #die die die die die

[silenthillbunni]

🚬🧸🧃🎀

#anyway so yeah im so sick of hating myself. of missing out on things and being too scared to go after things i want when i have the chance #so sick of almost being 25 and having spent almost 6 years alone in my room missing out on life #and my mom and sister might be moving in the not too distant future #so i have to try to get my life together for real now!!! or homelessness will be awaiting me :D #what i will try to do.. is start going to the gym (w my mom so i dont have to deal w the anxiety of an unknown place by myself sksk) #i'll workout 3-5 times a week. every week. i like going to the gym so if i just get started i dont have a doubt i'll not be able to do it #i'll focus on finishing my english class. hopefully in december even if i have the possibility to get it extended a few months #then i'll start my other 4 classes in january #i'll be patient and wait for my ultrasound and get the gallstone situation fixed (latest in january if i need surgery) #(and i have to try to make sure i eat properly so i dont wind up with b12 deficiency... i cant eat anything without pain but i have to..) #also i have an appt at the psychiatric in mid october. and im still waiting on what my healthcare center says. hopefully i can get cbt #if possible i will really really try to apply for jobs as a personal assistant sometime between january-may #if i have a job instead of being on wellfare i will 1) have way more money 2) not feel constabtly anxious abt being rejected and homeless #i'll stop caring abt me being 'old' and a late bloomer. the planet is dying. who cares if im 28 and start university???? #i'll take my time to finish high school. and the thing is i really should get a job before starting higher vocational education #bc the program i want to start i HAVE to have a laptop. and theres no way i can afford that now. cant even save up to it #also need to find and put myself up on waiting lists for student housing/apartments so i can actually move #i hate this city and i need to get the fuck out of here!!!! #but the world is crazy rn and it's super hard to find places to live and find jobs but it's not impossible so i need to try #i cant live like this & i have no idea how tf i'll manage to be a normal person and have a life but i need to try bc what else am i gnna do?

[androcola]

if you could see that you’re making excuses for yourself instead of opportunities we wouldn’t be having this conversation whatsoever. you post shit online and then when people try to help you avoid it. grow the fuck up and get a spine.

give me $9000

#asks #anon #bitch im not fucking making excuses did you Just Read My Post you dumbass???? #i just GAVE YOU REAL REASON. why i DONT DUCKING HAVE THE MONEY OR RESOURCES!!!!!! #im glad youre so fucking privileged!!!!!!!! #also im fucking VENTING!! im not asking anyone to fix my problems!! im just blowing hot air!!!! #god DAMN i cant stand people #i DONT have thw money. i DONT have the resources. i DONT have the support system. i DONT FUCKING HAVE ANYTHING!!!!!! #WORST OF ALL. I SUFFER FROM FUCKING DEBILITATING ANXIETY AMD AGORAPHOBIA!!!!!!!! #ALSO every god damn apartment complex in my town will just put me on likw a 5 fucking year waiting list!!!! #you dont understand not SHIT about my fucking situation!!!!!!! stop acting like you fucking know #wanna donate to me? i can make a fucking cashapp. put your money whwre your mouth is #no??? no????? pipe the fuck down then #there is NO available housing in my area. i DONT have the money for a car. i CANT afford to move out of town. I CANT DO SHIT #want me to work a fucking miracle or something???? leave me the fuck alone i didjt ask for your input in the first fucking place #literally the only real way to make any money thats actually enoigh to live off of is fucking sex work atp #and foe my own mental health im not doing that shit #whatever guess ill get on my andrew tate sigma chad grind or whatever. grindset. i dont fucking know

[palentonga]

im just fucked completely theres no hope at all

#i deserve no clemency i dont deserve to move past my failings #the only times ive been close to happy are when ive been naive and ignorant #and the times ive been miserable are when im much more insightful and incisive of myself #theres nothing to love about myself #maybe if i had the means to move forward with my life but i dont #i have to live here in the middle of nowhere and help take care of my mom #shes told me multiple times shed be dead if i wasnt with her #and shes right #i cant leave #cant explore life #my youth is over #my college years are spent #what would have been my college years anyway #nothing left to do but get gender nullification surgery when i can afford it sometime after my mom passes #and just live life alone #never gonna feel a girl run her fingers through my hair #never gonna hear a woman say that im her girl #no point #no life #none of this means anything #the mao sugiyama to budd dwyer pipeline #and i dont deserve it. i dont understand being a woman #and i never will #misogyny is so cooked into the fiber of my being that to undo it would be to undo myself #ig that means that since i have an obligation to undo misogyny #i also have an obligation to commit suicide down the line #not for a while. not while my moms alive #and maybe i dont deserve to get off that easy #and should just rot in dickless misery for the rest of my life

[nerdie-faerie]

Having a big family is too expensive. Where am I supposed to find the money for my brother's 20th, my cousin's 21st and graduation, my twin cousins turning 23, my other cousin turning 26 and having a baby all this month!! 😭

#Demon Spawn #+Extra #theres too much going on! and my mum doesnt tell me everything at once so i think i only have one purchase to worry about #and then she hits me with another one!! did you remember this? did you remember that? no i was still dealing with the last one #im sorry but siblings are prioritised then i gotta sort out my own sht if i can then afford all these other peoples things #when i dont even speak to them! then sure maybe ill get around to it but theyve all got more extravagant preferences which i cant afford 😅 #most of them still live at home and dont pay rent let alone tuition i cant afford their expectations and having 4 cousin birthdays #in a month is ridiculous have you seen the price of postage? and you wanna add in graduations and a baby into it??? #i probably sound like im btching about nothing to people who have a good relationship with their cousins but i never see them and even #when i do we dont talk its super awkward and we have nothing in common yet i gotta go spend money i dont have all at once on them #and i cant even say sht cus my mum arranged a 21st for me that i didnt want so they did end up getting me stuff #god i sound like such btch i just dont know these people and its stressful trying to get presents as is but so many occasions at once when #i have no clue is stressing me out right now its not that i dont want to celebrate its the sudden expenditure and the fact its not spread #out and that theres so many cus i already got 8 siblings and my mum is one of 5 and my cousins are getting older so theyre going through #milestones that require gifts too at the same time as their birthday

[ispybluesky]

i need a job SO bad just so i can commission my fav artists to draw my ocs. this is hell to me

#elise lives a life of excitement and intrigue #two artists whose work i love have opened comms lately and i cant even afford the $80 one let alone the $250 one😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[dilfpassing]

one day im gonna live in my own house with my own yard and my own decorations and my own furniture and my own kitchen and surround myself with only the people i want to be with and i’ll be able to sit on my porch and watch the sunrise and the sunset and the seasons come and go and things will be better

#i feel so stuck right now #i cant afford to move out and my future feels so uncertain #i dont want to be rich i just want to be able to afford my own things and live a life where i can just enjoy the small things #i want a house with a guest room to house my friends who want to come stay #and a yard where i can plant vegetables and herbs and flowers #and put up bird feeders and plant zinnias so goldfinches and purple finches and cardinals and blue jays and grackles will come visit #and a living room made up of furniture that ive pieced together over the years #and decorations on the walls that i put there #and a fridge and pantry full of the foods that i want to stock #and the ability to keep things as clean as i want them to be #to deep clean every monday like i used to do when i lived alone #to display the things i enjoy outside of just my room #to host dinner parties #to be able to just sit and be #i feel like a caged bird here i just want to have my own nest #things feel so overwhelming and upsetting right now but i know one day ill have moved on from this #ill have my own place where i can be myself and surround myself with safety instead of this hostile house

[rappin-drakken]

tired and broke and my housemate still hasn't managed to get the kitchen sink fixed since I've moved in so I guess it's random snacks for another meal

#not too broke but gotta pay tuition and have backup money yknow #also im going to go crazy if this sink isnt fixed in a month and the molder underneath continues to grow and grow #i havent paid anything living here since june 1 so im just keeping my head down at this point cause i cant afford to live anywhere alone

[problemnyatic]

..

#i feel so terrified and alone looking at the state of the world and everyone in it #i know we all know how bad it is and we're all up to our eyeballs in stressors #but we don't have time to wait for a bettee opportunity or a better time. they won't give us one #usa folks need to be organizing with their communities. we need to be galvanizing each other and our friends to do the same #We need to force our country to get its shit together ourselves. It won't happen overnight or on its own #We need to empower each other to depend less on the system by co-operating and breaking down the barrier between neighbors #something. anything #I at least need someone to tell me theyre gonna try. fuck #seeing people just living their lives and trying to go back to normal when our environment is collapsing is making me lose it #we cant afford to wait. we cant.

[wellthatschaotic]

sometimes i get a Wave Of Sadness from the realization that i cannot see myself in a position to have a Creechur in the forseeable future

#currently our family is. Busy With Many Things. so thats out #planning on moving in with our (good)mom at some point #but shes very disabled so idk if a creechur would be able to happen with her #and between us not being able to work full time (the Mental Illness) and the cost of. existing. chances are we'll never live alone #and no way can we afford to live alone and pay for a ouppy #:( #it would be easier if i could like. see it happening. like. ever. but i cant

[dirt-str1der]

Btw shinada is by far one of my favorite yakuza character, i think he is one of the very few characters that got an actual decent closure

Yeah ...... it didnt un-ruin his life but like it was satisfying at least .... but his whole story arc was crazy (in a good way) like god ...

#Thanks for the ask ! #Yakuza liveplay #this isnt about shinada because i want to talk about kiryu but he seems like a walking horror story to me. a man with his strings cut will #just keep falling ... like theres nobody to catch kiryu and he made sure of that himself #i think kiryu wont die. people will just keep throwing themselves in front of bullets meant for him until the group of people he can trust #and talk to slowly dwindle to nothing. he knows its because of him. i think kiryu will eventually stop trying to force his story in another #direction. he will keep walking until theres nobody behind him to follow. there is literally no end in sight for him no valiant death or #sacrifice he can close his book with. someone will keep bringing him back he will keep walking into pitfalls he cant afford the #gravitational pull of a big problem itll just keep drawinf him in until hes right in the heart of it and then he can pull it all apart and #he starts all over again with the next city the next family the next villain. kiryu will never rest and its in part his fault. just a little #he said it before. men like him dont get to choose what to do with their lives. they dont belong to themselves. like kiryu has stayed alive #in the scariest possible way. hes dead on record hes basically a ghost among the living. he cant live as himself his name doesnt belong to #him anymore (unless hes inputing his high score for karaoke) he drifts along until the next guy hooks him out #of the flow and puts him to work. and hes always happy to work because theres literally nothing else for him to do #i know people want him to retire but the lack of closure for him is so compelling to me .... #kiryu will die alone. he’ll see to that himself

[phoenixcavalier]

Pink sunset last night :)

#venting in the tags of my generic but pretty photo: holy fuck i need to quit my job #like i genuinely feel unsafe and its been hinted Several Times that my position may be terminated soon #so im just being like. dangled on a string and it SUCKS #but i am the only source of stability in my household and so i literally cannot #im just fuxking trspped like a rat #and im constantly having thoughts of like.. giving 30 days notice on my apartment breaking up and driving to like wyoming.. living in my car #but i have to be the responsoble one!! like always!!! #and no one else is looking out for me or able to catch me if i fall!!! #grrrrrrrrrr #its making me like angry at everyone in my life #i just wany to be left alone to do what i like and not have to worry about taking care of everybody else #and like. i cant even afford mental therapy or physical therapy or my meds rn and i dont think people realize how much i #am fucking sacrificing all the god damn time #jesus christ #i sound like the male lead in any mid century play #brechtian ass #anyways #im normal now #back to work 🙃

[ifeltfree]

its been one of those weeks pass the anthony green popsicle images

#im so tired of living in an emotionally abusive and manipulative household #im tired of my unhealthy toxic relationship with my mother #and im tired of watching her doing the same thing to my sisters that she did to me #and theres absolutely nothing to do about it #because i cant afford to take care of myself on my own let alone anyone else

[sandersinabox]

Not to be a downer on main buuuuuut

#my life sucks so much constantly and i really can never catch a break #and its been recently so bad after i got laid off and got my new job a few months ago #im just trying to catch one break but honestly it doesnt fucking matter #im just gonna live in my parents house forever because ill never be able to afford to leave #and also ill be forever alone which idk i kinda reconciled recently that im never going to have another partner ever again #so yeah idk i just really hate it here i wish everything was different but im just kinda stuck in this shithole #and there's a bunch of other things going on too but ya know #cant complain about them all

[sleepychaika]

mhh im gonna get hospitalised and. and its very inconvenient for my studying process and . kind of scary tee bee eich :(

#i'm like. sick. but in multiple ways. and they're hospitalising me for one thing #and not for my kidneys which are still v much hurting #and i also have an inflammation in my gums which may or may not be a big deal considering its placement #and i cant visit the dentist right away... and i am probably having a fever again from all inflamed things combined #(that's THREE of them)... #and i still can't measure my temperature and i dont eat enough and oughghh. how is my body still holding up #or. well. i guess badly considering that the inflammations keep happening #and i cant afford to eat enough and it's so dumb and scary and i can't stop thinking about it and ough. #living alone is tough but living alone in times like this is 100% tougher #well i should go to the hospital in like... friday. i hope i'll be ok till then :'( #Everything Happens.... So Muche . #(and hurts too. scary. very very scary) #.txt