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letstalkaboutshtufff · 3 years

Text

A Bad Feeling Pt 1

Levi x Reader

Part 1

Paring: Levi Ackerman x Cadet reader

Warnings: 18+ attempted rape/assault, cursing, mention of injury, violence

Summary: Reader feels uncomfortable around a overly friendly captain. Are they just over reacting? Or is there something else going on. What will Levi do when he finds out?

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A.n. ok so I literally wrote this in one go, it's probably trash but I wanted to post it anyway. Please lemme know what you think in the comments! Thank you!

"Y/n! captain Oro is asking for you" you did your best to hide the discomfort Armins words made you feel.

You smiled what you hoped was a convincing one and nodded. With a deep breath you made your way to Captains Oro's office.

Ever since you had been introduced to him those few weeks ago, he had taken a special liking to you. At first you had been excited, having such a highly skilled and well known captain take notice of you was one of the best feelings. Especially since your squad leader, Levi wasn't exactly heavy on praise.

Everyone loved Captain Oro, he was known for his strength and stamina on the battle field. He was both charismatic, and charming. Your fellow cadets practically swooned over him. You couldn't help but also get caught up in his perfection. At first that is..

Over time you noticed things about your meetings that put you on edge. An unnecessary shoulder touch here, a too low pat on the back there. Something was off. And although you had done your best to distance yourself from him, it was hard when your squads often had to work together.

But it was hard to say anything against him because even your cold blooded captain seemed to enjoy his presence.

Once you brought it up to your friend Sasha, about how you felt he was being too friendly. But she waved her hand and basically said you were worrying for nothing, he was just a friendly guy. And you were being dramatic.

Maybe you were overreacting? If captain levi approved of him, surely that meant he was a decent person right? Maybe he was just being really really friendly.

You decided to give him a chance and knocked on his door when you finally arrived.

"Come in" a muffled voice came from the other side.

With a click you entered the candlelit room. It was nearing sundown after all.

"Ah cadet y/n! Perfect, I was wondering if I might ask your opinion on something?" He smiled angelically and gestured towards a parchment on his desk.

"Of course sir" you nodded and approached him, reminding yourself of what sasha said. Just relax.

From the way the parchment was positioned you had no choice but to come to his side of the desk.

"Do you see this area here?" He gestured to what you now saw was a map. "What do you think of leading a squad through here instead of what we originally planned?"

The next 30 minutes you spent completely and professionally discussing strategies. Being the member of your squad that was best at this, made him asking for you completely justified. You felt bad for ever doubting his intentions.

"Thank you y/n, I think I have a better idea of what course we should pursue on our next expedition" he smiled sincerely.

"I'm glad I could be of service" you nodded and allowed a relaxed smile to pass your features. Feeling stupid you had judged him so harshly.

" If you wouldnt mind just one more thing?" You nodded as he pulled out a stack of papers.

"If you could look over this report of the last mission before I send it out? See if theres anything else to add?"

"Sure, I'd be happy to Captain" you grabbed the stack.

"And please if you can, return them to me tonight, I'll need them for the meeting bright and early"

"Yes sir, I'll finish it asap, good evening" and with that you exused yourself.

Tonight? It was already sundown. Well whatever, hes so busy he probably doesn't know what time of day it is.

You found a quiet spot amonsgt the crowds in the common room and got to work.

************************************

"Oi brat, it's passed curfew, go to your room now, we have important work tommorow" the unmistakable voice of your captain rang through the now empty hall.

You looked up in surprise and meet his usual scowl, not even realizing how late it had gotten.

"Hai, s-sorry captain, I'll go now" you gathered the report and quickly left, not wanting to receive another scolding for taking too long.

Oh crap you still had to deliever the report. Changing routes you snuck quietly down the familiar hallways. Not particularly feeling like running into Levi again. Something about him always made you act just a little dumber and it was definitely not because of your non existent crush on him...definitely not.. he was just intimidating is all.

*knock knock*

You waited patiently but there was no answer. Crap did he already go to bed? But he knew I was coming? Ugh what should I do? He needs these reports..

With a sigh you change direction again and head for his personal chambers. There was no way you were getting in trouble for not delivering these reports on time.

You smiled when you saw dim light flood from beneath the door.

Lightly you knocked, "Captain Oro, its y/n, sorry it's so late but I have the rep-" you were cut off abruptly when the door swung open and there stood Oro.

Except he looked nothing like the Oro you were used too seeing. His hair was loose from it's normal slicked back do, and the edges were dripping slightly. His shirt was loosely thrown on revealing a decent amount of skin. He must've just bathed.. you could see why the girls were so obsessed with him. He was, platonically speaking, a very gorgeous man.

You were taken aback but reminded yourself that you did knock after hours so of course he wasnt going to be all soldiered up.

"U-um s-sorry Captain, I have the reports" you averted your eyes and shoved the reports in his direction.

"Ah y/n, thank you, would you please put them on my table? My hands are still slightly wet." He laughed holding them up innocently.

"S-sure" god why were you stuttering so much, you fight goddamn titans for a living?! But somehow you were more nervous now than when a 10meter was clawing at you.

You entered the room and tried to avoid looking around too much.

You always wondered what the inside of the higher ups rooms look-

*click*

You whipped around, alarm bells suddenly back in full force.

"Captain what are you-"

"You're such a good girl, you know that y/n?" Oros whole demeanor changed and you cursed yourself for not trusting your earlier instincts.

"U-um" you really did not know what to say or do as he took a couple steps closer.

"Always so obedient for me, I think you deserve a reward don't you?"

Shit

"That's not...that's not necessary captain, I really should be going" you tried to lunge for the door but he was quicker and much much stronger.

"I don't believe I dismissed you cadet..." he purred pinning your arms to the door in the blink of an eye.

You were by no means weak, but your struggles were useless against him.

"Let me go" it took all your strength not to stutter in fear.

"How adorable, you know I love it when you follow my orders so well, but I think..." you shivered in disgust as you felt his lips near your neck and press down.

"I'd like to see you fight me as well" you whimpered as he sucked and bit down on the soft flesh.

"S-stop it, p-please" he smirked and looked into your fearful eyes with his lustful ones. "Stop? But that's not what you really want is it? You see I know exactly how girls like you are" he chuckled darkly and moved one of his hands to grip both your arms, while the other slid lower. You gasped when he cupped your breast. "S-stop! I'll, ill scream If you don't!" You felt a tear slide down your shaking form.

"Scream?" He snickered like you had told the funniest joke.

"Go ahead and scream doll, itll be very interesting to see what happens"

"W-what?" You were utterly confused.

"Think about it, if someone walks in on us, what would they think? Seeing a cadet after hours in her superiors chambers?"

"B-but I! I was bringing the reports i wasn't-!"

"Do you honestly think theyll care what you have to say? Who do you think theyll believe y/n? You a nobody cadet who's been fighting titans for 3 seconds? Or me, a selfless hero whos saved countless of scouts lives? All I have to tell them is that you came into my room and tried to seduce me. When I tried to restrain you, you screamed. Who do you think theyll listen too? Why else would you be here so late at night?"

"Y-You're..you're insane, you're not a hero, y-you're a coward who-" he grasped your jaw harshly causing you to wince.

"I'd watch that mouth of yours y/n" he squeezed harder. I am your superior after all, and we wouldnt want any nasty rumors going around that would have you suspended from the survey corps now would we?" He bent down and to your horror pressed his lips against yours.

Fuck fuck what do I do?!? Hes blackmailing me now. I cant fight him, hes too strong, think think think.

But your mind was blank when his cold lips pressed against your lips again. "Open your mouth" he ordered in a voice laced with animilistac lust.

You abruptly turned your head away desperate to get away.

"Heh, always such a tease" he traced a finger up and down your cheek, flipping over your lips. "I'll enjoy this-"

"CAPTAIN ORO, COMMANDER ERWIN REQUESTS YOUR PRESENCE IN HIS OFFICE IMMEDIATELY" a voice shouts from the other side of the locked door.

With an annoyed sigh, Oro pulls away slightly, "Did he say why?" He lazily looks over in the direction of the door.

"NO SIR!"

"guess it can't be helped... Alright tell him I'll be there shortly" he yelled out.

"Hai" the footsteps recended and you stood deathly still.

He pulled away from you and you immediately pulled your wrists to you, they were an angry red, and it scared you how much strength he had so effortlessly displayed.

"Sorry doll, it looks like we'll have to continue this another night" he stepped away and began dressing normally as if he hadn't just been assaulting you 5 second ago. You quickly make for the door but his voice falters your step, "Oh and y/n?"

You dont look at him, but fear held you in place until he finished, "If you mention our little moment to anyone, you know what will happen" you nodded quickly, anything to appease him and get out.

When the door shut behind you, you felt the flood of tears break through.

D-did, d-did that really happen?!?

You held a hand to quiet your sobs and quickly dashed through the hallways.

You're heart thumped and you felt the need to vomit. You hadn't felt this way since the first time youd encounted a titan. All you wanted to do was get to the safety of your room, just through the hall.

It felt like a bucket of cold water had been thrown on you when a cold voice shouted out and halted your movements. Please not now, oh god any time but now.

"Oi cadet y/n are you deaf as well as dumb? I asked you a question.

"Why are you out past curfew?" he sounded definitely annoyed and you gathered all your strength to hold the sobs out of your voice.

Without turning around you answered, "I-I had to deliver some r-reports..I'll head to my room now.." you stepped forward hoping he would let you go but you were not so lucky.

"Oi brat, did you hit your head? I didn't dismiss you yet. Not to mention you haven't even addressed me properly, maybe some time cleaning up horse shit will remind you how to respect your superiors" fuck he was definitely angry now.

Still you didn't turn around, you couldn't..."S-sorry Captain Levi, I'll do better in the future.." you barely could even focus on the words coming out of your mouth, your heart was beating a mile a minute. Please just leave me alone!

"Hahh" Levi uttered in disbelief and severe annoyance, even the most novice of cadets turn around when being spoken to by a superior. "Are you trying to piss me off brat?!?"

"No sir..." still you didnt turn around, but gulped in fear when you heard sharp footsteps near you.

"Cadet y/n, you have three seconds to turn around and salute me properly before I throw you into the cells for insubordination" he ordered in his dangerously calm voice, that you never thought would be directed at you.

Having no other choice you slowly turn around, hoping to god the darkness of the room would be enough to hide your current state.

You kept your head down, letting your hair fall over your face, but gave a proper salute. Hiding the Wince that came when the tender flesh of your wrist had to bend.

Your eyes were trained on the floor. And you tried to remember how to breathe normally again.

"At least you remember how to-" abruptly his harsh scolding stopped.

Why did he stop?! Fuck did he notice something. No no calm down, he probably just is coming up with another punishment...right?

Wrong...

Levi was far from being done with dicisplining you but he caught sight of your bruised wrist and furrowed his brows immediately. He knew for a fact the last time you spoke in the hall those had not been there. He was quick to take in the rest of your demeanor and knew immediately that the reason you were acting disrespectful was because something was wrong.

"Cadet y/n.." he said suspiciously slow and not full of anger anymore.

"Y-yes?" Please dont ask me, please dont ask me, please dont-

"Look at me"

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Part 2 here

Okay so that's part 1! Please comment and lemme know what you think🥰also I'm super sensitive so please no hateful comments. Thanks for reading!

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angelicmichael · 3 years

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Imminient Annihilation sounds so dope - Chapter Ten

Michael Langdon X Reader

Summary: Reader and Michael continue to work through their issues and finally start to warm up to each other even further.

Words: 5.9k+ …oops

Warnings: just normal IA warnings (swear words, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, enemies to lovers, slowburn, etc) anddd maybeee a bit of fluff 👁

A/N: hey guys! Sorry I haven’t updated this in a few months but hopefully this is satisfactory hehe. This chapter is kinda a turning point in the fic so I hope u guys like it!! Also I watched Jennifer’s Body as I finished this so.. do what u must w that information 😌 djdjd

Previous Chapter

Rain was never something you were accustomed too. Spending so much time in Los Angeles had made you partially spoiled when it came to the weather - which is why you knew immediately your day was going to be shit when you woke up to rain.

You tried to convince yourself that the emotions you were feeling weren’t complete disdain but rather just a pessimistic version of indifference.. or that’s what you hoped anyway.

You knew realistically that your day wasn’t already doomed before it even started; and that the rain was nothing more than a mere inconvenience.. However; you still felt justified in complaining, considering today was the day you were ripping the band-aide off and moving in to the apartment Michael had oh so graciously chosen to give you.

Your pessimistic mood surrounding the entire situation was inevitable, and that was something you didn’t even bother to resist or fight. It didn’t take long for your thoughts to quickly go south as you quickly packed. Hatred that seemingly came out of nowhere (but that you realistically knew was only temporarily dormant) wasted no time in blinding your judgement - making you feel a nearly nauseating amount of jealousy and anger for people who actually seemed to be fucking happy in their relationships and werent forced into.. whatever shitty living situation you knew you were bound to find yourself in.

An apartment with no strings attached was way too fucking simple, and you knew it was too good to be true. You knew you were basically walking into a trap, and for what reason were you doing that so willingly? Just so that maybe Michael could start to tolerate you? You resented yourself for even agreeing to this but you also understood you really had no other option.

However; personal feelings aside.. you still had a mission to accomplish. You still had to attempt to seduce Michael, and even though you were doing a shit job at that so far - you still had to try. You knew realistically it was only a matter of time before Cordelia would ask about the progress you've made, and you would have to tell her something.

You had to do this.

That's why you were (semi) blindly choosing to move in to a building you knew you absoluetly couldnt afford; and why you were sucking up your pride and choosing to become semi reliant on Michael.

No one from the coven knew, and for the time being you intended to keep it that way. After all, even though Mallory didnt exactly know that Michael gave you a whole ass fucking apartment - your sure she probably suspected that something important happened between you and Michael just from the short conversation you three harbored together. But for the time being, you didnt have to worry about that. You had bigger things that were on your mind.. like the actual apartment door itself that you currently stood in front of.

You held the keys limply in your hand, your bag slumped next to you as you procrastinated something as fucking simple as opening a door. How pathetic.

You continued to stall in the hallway regardless - thankful there was no one passing through to witness how ridiculous you looked. Your gaze fell south down to your keys which were cold in your hand. Dripping slowly with the subtle rainwater that managed to linger on them, along with the rest of your clothes.

Your skin stung from the cold that seemed stubborn to leave, and a nice change of clothes and a hot shower wouldnt be the absolute worst thing in the world..

Fuck.

You bit your lip in order to prevent letting the profanity from rolling off your tongue. Quickly getting a better grip on the keys (which only made you somehow colder) and numbly, hastily unlocking the door.

You pushed it open, letting the door hit the wall and taking a few steps inside before dropping your bag to the floor.. as well as your jaw.

No words could possibly convey how you felt as you noticed how the room was already illuminated with not only natural light from the already huge windows you could see.. but also with a warm, yellow artificial glow.

Was someone already here?

What the fuck?

The hatred and resentment you previously felt toward others earlier rapidly started to return - except this time it was targeted at one very specific person.

It didnt even register in your mind that the light could've been left on by accident or that people besides Michael actually existed that could be present in the room but.. you didnt care. Anger was the only emotion that was solely present in your body as you fully abandoned your bag by the door. Advancing forward; and only feeling more shock and disbelief with every step you took at the thought that he could very possibly be in (what was supposed to be) your space.

"Michael, I swear to God-"

"Y/n?” said a soft, feminine voice.

It was practically automatic how you froze. Just getting close enough to notice that it wasn’t Michael after all that was on your bed in your new studio apartment, but a woman sat on your bed instead.

For about two seconds, you were scared it was Madison but.. that was a stupid assumption within itself. The company you were with was from a far different nature than of which Madison was, even though at first glance the two woman might look or sound similar. There were so many qualities that distinguished Mallory from Madison. Brown, auburn hair.. dark eyeshadow.. and her classic black boots. It didn’t take long for your anger to fade away as you tried to not think about how logically this still didn’t make sense - walking closer to your bed anyway.

"How did you get in here? And since when did you ever break into peoples rooms?" You asked with a laugh.

Mallory echoed your laugh back, seemingly watching you and your behavior. As if she was expecting you to do something or to act a certain way.. like perhaps leave.

"I didnt break into your apartment but.. you should probably sit down." She spoke, before nodding off to her side. Nonverbally suggesting you to sit next to her.

You did as you were told. Noticing briefly before you sat down how nice the apartment actually was.. including the bed.

The walls, and most of everything in the apartment was a solid black. It looked sleek, and even though black paint made most rooms look small - the natural light helped keep things looking open which you appreciated. It was no surprise that the bed matched the dark theme too. The sheets were silky, black satin. You almost laughed at how comfortable the bed was once you sat next to Mallory, the entire situation was so ridiculous it nearly hurt for you to not laugh out loud. The two of you sat in the silence for a moment.. you were each incredibly anxious, that was more than apparent.

You looked up at Mallory, expecting her to speak first and explain herself since after all.. shes the one who broke into your apartment but she still remained quiet.. Stalling, you could only guess.

"So, why are you here? How did you even get in here? Is everything okay?" You asked, your words speedy and rushed.

Panic started to temporarily set in when you realized that something could be serisouly wrong with the coven, even though you knew how completly irrational it was to think that way with no evidence. What if witch hunters found them? What if someone preformed the seven wonders and it went wrong? What if the plan had suddenly changed with Michael?

Mallory seemed to pick on how anxious you suddenly were, putting a hand on your upper arm before making you meet her gaze. Her soft, hazel brown eyes immeadietly making your breathe slow. That was another reason you were so thankful for Mallory - the soothing, calming effect she seemed to have on everyone she met was something you never took for granted.. Espically now.

"Hey, nothing's wrong and nothing happened. I promise. I just wanted to see you and talk to you, and I figured we should catch up after Michael basically made me leave," Mallory explained.

You quickly nodded. Feeling guilt start to creep into your system once you remembered how Michael previously treated her.

"Yeah, youre right. I've been wanting to see you anyway and I'm sorry I didnt just call you last night or something.. and I know I cant control him but I'm still sorry for how Michael treated you. I shouldn't have brought you into that-"

"(Y/n), stop," Mallory said urgently. Shaking her head slightly in disagreement with your words. "Sure, Michael was acting like a dick but.. it's nothing I'm not exactly accustomed too. It was harmless," she ended her words with a smile. One that was meant to comfort you both at the epiphany her words brought.

You sat with her words for a moment. The realization suddenly hitting you like a truck-

"Wait.. what? Do you know Michael?"

Mallory fell completely silent. Looking at you almost in a.. guilty manner. Her gaze fell downwards before she looked up to meet yours once more, licking her lips anxiously before she uttered out a quiet reply.

"I wasnt going to tell you because I knew it would make you upset but.. Michael called me last night-"

"And you answered?" Your voice raised up a few octaves unwillingly. Threatening to break as you tried to process what you were hearing.

As much as you wanted to immeadietly jump to conclusions, you had to remind yourself that this was Mallory you were talking too. Your best friend, Mallory. You knew she would never do anything to intentionally hurt you.

You noticed Mallory was also starting to get tense. Her spine suddenly a bit too straight and her shoulders were rigid. It was nice to know you werent the only person in this situation who was feeling this way, although you would be lying if you were to say that you werent curious for why Mallory felt tense.

"At first, no but he kept calling so I figured it would cause no harm to see what he wanted so, I answered," Mallory said cautiously.

It was obvious she had more to say and as much as you wanted her to keep talking and fully explain herself - you were more than happy that you didnt have to cut her off again. It was too much. This was too much.

You pinched the bridge of your nose before loudly exhaling with a shallow growl. Not really caring that it probably was coming off like you were mad at Mallory when in reality, that wasn’t the case. Mallory wasn’t the problem; you were really just beyond fucking pissed at Michael.

But at this point.. that wasnt new news.

"I told him that we shouldnt be talking, but he insisted," Mallory continued with a shrug.

You tried to sit up straight again; trying to exhale some of the pure fucking anger that was currently coursing through your system. Your vision was spotted black when you opened your eyes - your gaze pointed upwards at the smooth, blank ceiling. Quickly wishing that you were anywhere else, or really anyone else at the moment.

What you wouldnt kill to swap bodies again.. but then again, who knows what the hell Michael was currently doing at the moment.. He couldnt be trusted.

That was more than obvious now.

You should've known that he would contact Mallory, but how he even got her number was beyond you.. Unless-

"How did he even get your number?" You asked. Your tone strikingly calm.

Mallory looked incredibly spooked when your head suddenly snapped over to look at her. As if she was worried you were angry at her still, and as much as you wanted to reassure her otherwise, you really didnt have the energy to do so anymore. Not at the moment anyway.

"You can't be mad when I tell you the answer, okay?" She said softly.

Your features immeadietly softened at her words. The rest of your body relaxed as well; your shoulders dropping and your jaw unclenching.

"Mallory, I could never be mad at you. You could never piss me off, i'm just.. frustrated at Michael. It's not at you, I swear," you said. Trying your best to make your words sound reassuring and genuine.

Mallorys reaction wasnt one that was verbal but immeadite nonetheless. Her arms suddenly shot out and wrapped themselves around you. Her body temporarily pressing into yours as your hands went to her back, before she quickly broke the hug.

"Promise?" Mallory prompted. Brown eyes looking diligently into yours.

"Yeah.. I promise. Just tell me what that idiot did,” you said halfheartedly.

"So.. I've had his number for a while. Not for too long but just since you two switched. But, we never really talked," Her voice stalled as she watched your reaction. Your mouth grew dry as you really tried to let it sink in that they've known eachother since- well for atleast a week. "But I knew immeadietly that it wasnt you.. that day. I'm sorry I lied, but Michael made me promise."

"Why didnt you just tell me?"

Mallory looked at you in a guilty manner. Her lips pursing shut as she looked solemnly at her shoes, avoiding eye contact. You knew exactly why she was being quiet - she didnt want to admit why she had lied but.. the answer was pretty obvious.

Even though Mallory was one of the strongest witches - almost stronger than Cordelia on some days, she still was scared of Michael and that was nothing worth holding a grudge over. After all he was still the antichrist, no matter how (mostly) harmless and idiotic he seemed to you now.

"Okay.. I guess that doesnt really matter," you admitted with a laugh. Figeting with your hands as you heard a shallow laugh omit also from Mallory, which made you smile. The shallow pit that resided in your stomach finally starting to let up. "But.. What did he call you about last night?"

Mallory hesitated again before giving you another subtle smile.

"It was mostly about you.. I know how you feel about him y/n, but its working. I promise you. Hes finally warming up to you. I just wish you could hear how he talks about you,” she spoke. Taking your hands into her soft, warm ones.

"I wish I believed that," You admitted.

"I wouldnt lie to you. Hes finally starting to warm up to you, plus it was obvious yesterday-"

"Yeah; It was obvious how strong he was coming onto you."

Mallory laughed again at your words. Shaking her head slightly in protest.

“Y/n you know that’s not true. The only reason why he was flirting with me was just to get to you.. I thought that was obvious.”

“It was obvious I just.. didn’t know that you knew that. I mean, Michael has Madison.. or he did so you think that would at least satisfy his flirting needs for a bit but.. Michael faking to be interested in you, that would mean he wanted a reaction out of me on purpose? Why would he-“

“You know why. You need to start cutting yourself slack and realize that maybee this rivalry is starting to be one sided.”

You pouted at her words at the realization that they actually held more truth in them than you were willing to admit. If Michael didn’t hate you anymore, if he was truly actually willing to be civil.. then why were you still so upset? Were you the one who was unintentionally causing problems now? Was it now you instead of Michael that was holding the relationship back?

How fucking stupid.

“I can’t trust him, Mallory. How can I when he and Madison literally tried to kill me. I can never forget that they did that to me.”

“I’m not asking you to forget what he did, y/n. I’m just saying that maybe it wouldn’t hurt to start having an open mind around him, and see where it gets you.”

You were struck silent, knowing that Mallory was completely right. If you wanted to have any hope at all of making things right with Michael (even though you really didn’t do anything wrong..) you would have to try a different approach because obviously; what you were doing now wasn’t working. Being snarky, and vaguely threatening him every chance you got was fun of course but- it wasn’t working. Even though Mallory was probably the sweetest person you knew, the fact your own best friend had to (very politely) make a intervention was.. not a good sign. Although, you knew Mallory was doing this for your best interest because if she didn’t say anything, then Cordelia certainly would.

And sadly, Mallory was actually right.

If you wanted things with Michael to advance any further; or to advance at all you needed to step things up but, you could always worry about that after Mallory left.

“So what, are you guys besties now or something?” You sneered.

“Shut up!” Mallory said with a laugh, playfully pushing you over a bit. “He’s barely even my acquaintance. The only reason he’s being nice to me is just to get to you, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I mean that’s the goal-“

“Do you think that’s the only reason?” You interrupted.

Your throat automatically tightened after you spoke, the threat of your words potentially being true coaxing you to silence. Your not sure why the thought of Michael using you made you upset.. it’s not as if you didn’t think he was doing it before but this time it was different. Perhaps it was because you finally thought Michael actually had some type of interest in you.. and to have that suddenly ripped away?

That would leave you beyond broken.. you knew that for certain.

Mallory looked at you solemnly, as if she was already resenting her words before she had to say them outloud.

“Look, I don’t exactly know Michaels intentions and I’m not going to pretend too.. I don’t really think anyone does at this point but I do know that regardless of your feelings, or even his feelings that.. you have to try.”

You let out a loud exhale.

“I mean you said it yourself.. Michaels so unpredictable, there’s no point in guessing how he feels so.. maybe I should just.. ask him?”

Realistically you didn’t know how good of a idea that was- but.. trying to remain realistic was something you gave up on days ago. Pretty much the same day you switched and that definitely wasn’t a coincidence by any means.

As soon as Mallorys mouth opened, you heard three loud knocks. Quick and rapid with no hesitation between them. The apartment nearly shook with the force of whoever happened to be at your door, and you certainly didn’t doubt that your neighbors heard the knocking as well.

Mallory looked at you in utter confusion, but stayed on the bed nonetheless with no sign of getting up. Naturally, you found yourself scooting closer to the end of the bed, knowing it was you who was going to have to get the door.. and that made you scared shitless. Not because you were necessarily scared to open the door but because you had a horribly bad feeling on who was on the other side.. There was only one person that you knew of that was aware of where you lived, and you knew it wasn’t matience or staff.

You knew standing up was the logical thing to do but you still stalled. Hands starting to painfully dig into the soft, expensive sheets that lie underneath you. You mouthed a silent, ‘what the fuck?’ to Mallory but your head snapped back at the door..

Three more knocks which were only louder and more persistent than the last.

“Coming!” You quickly called out.

It was pure anxiety that fueled your next actions. You quickly stood up from the bed, trying to walk hurriedly to the door as fast as you could and trying your damn best not to think.. Hoping Mallory also had a idea of who was at the door and also happened to get the fuck out of view.

You didn’t want a repeat of yesterday happening again today, and you knew you wouldn’t hesitate to slap Michael if he tried to flirt with her again. Even though, you knew you weren’t supposed to act like that anymore.. but why should you have manners if Michael refused them as well?

Opening the door swiftly and without a second thought; you stood breathless as you saw a familiar blonde standing in front of you.

You both stared at each other at first - each not daring to have the balls to say ‘hello’ or anything else for that matter.. You noticed how Michael first eyed you up, fully looking up and down your body (as well as peering behind you, hopefully not making eye contact with Mallory). You made a point to just look into Michaels eyes, refusing to do what he was doing.. whatever the fuck that truly was.

“How did you know I would be here?” You breathed.

“I knew it was just a matter of time before you’d come, but it also never hurt to charm the hotel staff a bit,” Michael responded swiftly without a second beat, almost as if he anticipated your words. His lips upturned slightly at the edges, in a way that nearly made your stomach sick.

“The hotel staff-?!”

“I have connections everywhere y/n, I thought you knew that,” he sneered.

He brushed past you as you continued to stand in shock. Your mouth slightly falling open as Michael took a few steps into your apartment - looking curiously around, almost as if he knew Mallory was here..

“I did.. I think that’s obvious,” you shot back hurriedly. “But thank you for the apartment again, Michael. I still feel weird taking it but it is nice I’ll admit,” you continued. Hoping to make him turn around to look back at you and hopefully not find Mallory.. Which worked. At least for a few seconds at least.

Michael made direct eye contact with you for a moment, almost as if he wanted to speak but was deliberately choosing not too. Instead he turned around, walking in deeper in the apartment.

Your mouth immediately dropped open - your feet carried yourself forward as you started to feel a bit numb with shock- not knowing even in the slightest how you were going to handle the situation if Mallory didn’t fucking move.

Sure enough..

“You always manage to linger.. don’t you?” Michael spoke.

It took only a couple steps for you to fully realize he wasn’t speaking to you. You only saw his backside as you approached them. Quickly meeting Mallorys gaze as you came into view.. Her brown eyes darker than ever as she peered up at you.

This time it is nearly impossible to distinguish whether she looked in agony from Michaels appearance or yours; since you apparently interrupted them. Her gaze quickly returned back to meet Michaels before you could think anything of it.

“I’m not here to see you, Michael.” Mallory announced. Her tone harsher than what you were expecting what apparent friends would use.. Were they even really friends?

Mallory suddenly stood up while Michael was still standing a few feet in front of her. Making eye contact with Michael for a split second before almost ducking around him before she stood in front of you.. leaving Michael speechless behind her. She quickly hugged you, her arms only embracing you for a split second before leaving. It was obvious she was in a hurry to leave now but.. you weren’t sure exactly why.

“I should get going, you and Michael have a lot to talk about,” she subtly smiled before turning to leave.. not letting you reply or have any sort of reaction to her words.

You stood solemnly as you heard Mallory’s footsteps gradually go farther away, before hearing the door open and close. You watched Michaels back as he refused to turn around.

“How was your nice chat with Mallory?”

“Why are you asking? Am I not allowed to see her or something?” You bit back. Your words possibly twice as venomous as his were.

Michael hastily turned around, looking at you with utter disbelief. His blue eyes looking into yours, as if he was suddenly surprised by your tone and how you were acting - as if his behavior didn’t proceeded yours.

“You need to relax,” he snapped. He approached you until he was right in front of you. “I wasn’t asking because I’m trying to control you, I know that’s what your thinking,” His words fell soft until they were nearly inaudible. “I just wanted to ask what she talked to you about.”

“About us?” You prompted.

“Well what else would she be talking to you about,” he snickered. His words spoken as more of a statement than a question. His laughter quickly dwindled off after he saw how rigid your frame suddenly looked. “Kidding. For the most part.. she said she was going to talk to you, and I figured I should actually speak to you this time rather than her.”

“Are you.. actually trying to trust me, Michael Langdon?” You teased. A smile, as well as laughter escaped from your lips at the mere thought.

Even though the thought was amusing on its own, you still didn’t completely trust him. Even now when he had Mallorys trust (for the most part), you still didn’t doubt that he had a ulterior motive.

Michael finally stepped back, hesitantly breaking eye contact before inaudibly beckoning you to follow him.

“I’m trying, just like how I told you I would,” He hauntingly reminded you.

You followed him silently to the long leather couch that sat by the overly expansive windows. Sitting down next to him in a way that felt almost too casual.. but being casual around Michael and not borderline fearing for your life was something you would have to adjust too.

You noticed how he instantly slipped his shoes off; drawing up his feet on the couch.. his arms and as well the rest of him contained. Away from you.

“So if your trying.. now,” you suggested uncertainly. “Then.. tell me why you came here to talk suddenly again? I mean why not just go through Mallory again like you’ve doing previously?”

“(Y/n), please. Take me seriously and just trust me for once,” His words came out quick and stern as he spoke them. “I was being serious yesterday, as well as all the other times when I told you I wanted to start.. putting effort in and trying.”

You stared at Michael utterly dumbfounded.. Feeling a bit hopeless that you actually felt almost.. touched by his words. That’s if he was actually being serious, anyway.

“What does trying mean to you?” You asked carefully. Your mind naturally went back to Madison.. were they even broken up yet? Was that even something that Michael was willing to do for you, and how was that something you could just ask? “What about-“

“Madison’s fine. She’s fine.. with everything,” he replied hesitantly.

You simply ignored the fact that he seemed to pick up what you were talking about almost immeadietly.. focusing on rather the latter part of the sentence.. that she was okay with everything?

“So she knows? That you’re here?”

“Yeah. She knows but that’s besides the point. Madison isn’t a part of the equation anymore, I don’t want to talk about her,” He spoke as if his words were final and not to be argued with, but his tone wasn’t angry. He was just done.. and you were too.

You wish that wasn’t the case though. Cutting Madison off didn’t sit right with you in the slightest, and it would definitely have to be something that would have to be mended later. That was a given.

Madison and Michaels relationship was far too close for them to suddenly split and remain like that forever - it was temporary, but so is everything really. That shouldn’t phase you but - it still managed too.

“Okay. I’m sorry, I didn’t-“ you started.

“It’s fine. I knew you would ask.. She’s the reason why I’m here actually,” His eyes broke contact and averted down to his hands. “I don’t mean that as in I’m not here to see you but, it was something she said that brought me here.” He continued, his voice almost growing soft now at just the mention of his ex girlfriend.. and now, you felt like you actually were starting to understand his point of view. Not fully but, it was clear that Michael was trying to be more open with you, and this time he wasn’t ‘fake’ drunk.

It took nearly everything in you to not immeadietly retort but just like the night where you were at the party; you tried to fully hear him out since this was apparently one of the few times he was being civil.

“So Madison gave you advice and you actually took it?” You said while laughing softly. Trying to lighten the mood since Michael seemed to be brooding.

Michael didn’t laugh back but instead his gaze flickered up to meet yours for a moment. The corners of his mouth upturning in a shallow smile that only lasted for a few seconds.

“I did because it made sense.” He said, his tone still remaining serious. You noticed how careful he was being with his words.. something that was typical for Michael to do but this time it seemed a bit too deliberate. You wanted to ask what exactly Madison even told him to do but.. that felt wrong. “It was also the right thing to do.. Being close to you is something I should’ve done a while ago, probably immeadietly-“

“But what’s in the past; stays in the past. And since your so adamant about being close to me.. we can always try now,” you cut in.

Michael continued to sit a good distance away from you; you thought it was ironic how he could talk about wanting to get close with you but wouldn’t dare to move any closer. That thought made your pride a little bit too happy.

Right before he could open his mouth to say something; his phone rang. The sound suddenly earsplitting and blaring but Michael didn’t bother to flinch. Instead he stood up and answered his phone.. making sure to nearly trek across the apartment before he said anything into the phone.

You stretched and casually examined him as he talked, you had a feeling who it was on the line..

After how tense things were with Mallory - you knew they probably weren’t going to be on friendly terms anytime soon.. especially in front of you. And judging by how.. oddly relaxed he seemed (yet timid when he caught your gaze and realized you were staring), it had to be one person.

You were about to sink back into the couch and try your best to not speculate what they were talking about, but before you could fully turn - you realized Michael was sauntering towards you.. clearly still on the phone.

Oh fuck.

Before you could ask what was wrong, the look he gave you alone ushered you to silence.

He quickly held the phone away from his ear. A quick glance at the screen confirmed that the call was still active.

“You said you forgive Madison.. right?” He spoke lowly. His words barely audible, more so mouthing the words than actually speaking them.

You looked at him with a expression you’re sure looked as if you were furious but you were really just completely confused. You wanted to ask but.. there was no time if she was on the phone, but knowing what you were about to get yourself into would also be nice to know.

His eyes had since lost the sharpness that had nearly cut you earlier, instead swarming with urgency and a bit of panic.. It had to be Madison. The only person that could ever have that effect on Michael was Madison.

You simply nodded in response. Not trusting yourself to speak quietly outloud but you also didn’t exactly trust your response because it wasn’t exactly truthful, but Michael seemed to be level headed.. for now.

Michael immeadietly turned and held the phone back up to his ear, this time staying in closer proximity and within ear shot. Putting on his shoes as he continued to hold the conversation he was having.

“Okay

...

So when are you coming?

...

Great, see you then. . . Bye.”

If you didn’t just hear the words that you thought you had heard.. you knew under normal circumstances your heart would’ve ached when you realized how Michael hesitated before he said goodbye, most likely catching himself before he said ‘I love you’. Instead though, you felt a gruesome wave of nausea suddenly rise through you.. urging you to shakily stand up and speak without thinking.

“She’s coming to see you?”

Michael barely gave you a second glance as he turned around and started to head for the front door of the apartment.

“Yes. You’ll be seeing her too, don’t worry.” He spoke before he quickly let the door shut behind him.

You continued to stand, utterly speechless.

Part of you wanted to run after him and the other part merely wanted to scream in anger that he had already made fucking plans but instead you felt numb. Numb and calm.

You returned to your bag and unpacked, trying your best to not let your emotions consume you like they previously had too many times.. until you finally broke down and called Mallory.

Taglist: @michaellangdonstanaccount @langdonsexual @jimmason @blakescoven @dark-mei-rose @9layerdevilfoodcake @prophecy-is-inevitable @matildaofoz @beautyiswithinchaos @frenchlangdon @king-with-no-crovvn @melodylangdon @littledemondani @langdons-pinkyring @celestialrequiem @sojournmichael @mindlesschicca

Let me know if u would like to be added or removed to the taglist!!

#michael x reader #Michael Langdon x reader #michael langdon fanfic #michael langdon fanfiction #Michael Langdon #my fic #Imminient Annihilation #hopefully y’all like this and it’s not all over the place djdjd #about to post to ao3 like always #ALSO thank u for the 2k hits on ao3!! 🥺💖#also side note - Jennifer’s body was amazing and now I wanna write something related 😭

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courtney-deserved-better · 3 years

Note

whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)

this is a great question!!

if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing

for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works

slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits

and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.

(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)

as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.

right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.

but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!

ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:

[SIERRA]

MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.

Chef: hey!

Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married

Sierra: …can we just turn it off please

[COURTNEY]

DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—

MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?

ZARINA: And kick ass!

DAD: Zarina!

Video cuts out.

Alejandro: courtney you good?

Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter

Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]

[ALEJANDRO]

MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.

DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.

JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]

Alejandro: callate!

MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.

DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.

[NOAH]

MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!

ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!

RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]

MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?

Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—

ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!

LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.

BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding

ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!

JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.

Noah: [frozen, ashamed]

Sierra: well that was a mess

Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]

Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…

Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv

Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane

Chef: oh fuck

Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom

Everyone: …

Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems

Everyone: yeah ok sounds good

***

Courtney: so that sucked

Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok

Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like

Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx

***

Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you

Noah: yep

Alejandro: why?

Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified

#slippery slopes #ask #anon #total drama #writing #fic #my fic

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transsexualhamlet · 3 years

Text

I feel like Louis doesn't get the attention and love he deserves sometimes

And not just in the When Louis Got Character Development And Stopped Wanting To Kill Sherlock Lol he's good, I mean just straight up murderous unapologetic stray cat louis. He's already so great and I am an enthusiastic louis apologist

Like no I wouldn't have wanted him to. Actually Kill Sherlock. yeah. but him wanting to do that was completely rational, tbh, liam was acting like a fucking lovestruck idiot and taking great and unnecessary risk, and doing that has always worked for him in the past.

And look at louis. He's got so much righteous anger and I'm totally with him on with no restraints just being completely fine with killing assholes and being a little shit just because

The man watched his older brother have to kill himself trying to get enough money to survive, all the while with him like Dying Of Some Serious Heart Issue and Being Orphans who get underestimated, ridiculed, and treated terribly by rich people, abled people, adults, just Men in general I dont even know he's totally justified in hating them unconditionally and only wanting to protect and care about his family

He's tired of being overlooked, treated like a servant, disrespected, disregarded, insulted, and he's tired of that happening to his family as well. And I think that it's great that he was able to take that energy and anger and put it to use in what he wanted to do and not wait for the priveleged people to let him. It sucked for him, because he enjoyed and wanted to do household kind of tasks like housework and cooking but he was basically just made to do it for ungrateful bitches throughout his childhood and will now be throwing tea at anyone who doesn't compliment it, as he should

He may look generally hostile, but he genuinely just wants to make a good life and world for his family, be happy and have all of the rest of them be happy, feeling satisfied by providing for them and helping them while being treated as equal.

Side note, I think both liam and louis are actually trans*, I don't know, if i look at a character hard enough they spontaneously turn transgender and Look At Him Why Does This Man Have So Much Hip- but most of it comes from the way he acts and reacts to things. And this could be perfectly explained away by him in like Child Labor plus being young, poor and physically ill gave him much the same Minority experience as a girl in that era, but being afab would only strengthen the reason he's........ Like That? He just really radiates the energy of someone who's experienced misogyny and would rate it -100/10 if anyone percieves me I will end their life

One more thing tho, I don't see why people have a problem with people headcanoning louis as aro/ace? Sorry that I have the sexiest opinions man his colors are literally the ace flag and his favorite dynamic is found family. He clearly does not want to be with anyone ever and yall need to be ok with people thinking that<3

All in all, Louis is completely justified in his actions and I support him stabbing people, not just after going "maturing is realizing MI6". He can be an aggressive, petty, immature gremlin if he wants to, ok?

*on different levels, for louis it's 100 percent a headcanon we've legit seen his birth certificate but for Liam it's kind of a conspiracy theory you cant prove he isn't /hj

#rowan screams into the void #rowan's hyperfixation essays #moriarty the patriot #louis james moriarty #LMAO THIS CAME OFF SO AGGRESSIVE #the inner louis just came for tumblr huh #also yes i do in fact kin him as well. 2 out of 3 moriartys isnt bad huh

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booasaur · 3 years

Note

i always like to read your opinions so what you think about shelby x toni, we can see very clear that writers used every fucking romantic trope with them, and they are THE romantic couple, but when you think their feelings change or start? you think both were sexually attracted since minute 1? that despite allthat "hate" toni feel one of the reasons was because she cant handle to be attracted to a girl like shelby who is all the opposite of her? can not wait to see how their rel grows in s2.

Aw, thank you! Um, hmm. I’m actually so bad at these because, as I’ve said, after so many years of seeing subtext where it wasn’t written, I always underestimate when it canonically is there (and not wishful thinking) until it’s completely unavoidable. So normally I’d be like, oh, ep 7, but tbh, the way it was written...well, hmm.

First, it’s so different, right, from m/f crushes when your very approach to a dynamic is always knowing the possibility’s there (even when it turns out not to be, heh). So I think for Toni, an appreciation for Shelby’s objective hotness (because...come on) was completely drowned out by her dislike of what she saw Shelby as, as you said, a girl like that, and then that was just exacerbated by her jealousy over Martha. Anything more was never on the cards for her so she didn’t have to think deeper on it. And yeah, people can crush on their straight friends and popular kids and celebrities but that’s pretty different from a random stranger you’ve literally just met. I do think you’re not wrong, in that one of the things Toni resented Shelby for was that she found her so attractive, but at that point, that’d have been minor compared to her overall resentment.

For Shelby, despite her own conflicted feelings about sexuality and religion, the possibility was there from the start. She harbored no dislike of what Toni represented, and in fact, her resentment or jealousy would have been of Toni’s freedom and bravery, so she was freer to just...like her. She was of course irritated by Toni’s attitude once it manifested so aggressively against her but I think she was still curious and intrigued and the kind of person who, attraction or not, would have still wanted to win her over. A people-pleaser, compared to Toni’s very defensive hurt-people-before-they-hurt-you vibe.

And then as the days went on and Shelby kept on being so upbeat, I think Toni was impressed but it also made her angrier? As if it just confirmed everything she was thinking. But you know, it’s interesting, we all--me included--have talked and joked about the change in Toni’s attitude once the kiss happened, but rewatching, it was actually a little before, no? Like we were saying, Toni thought of Shelby more as an idea, the kind of person she seemed like, this privileged religious pretty Southern girl, who could afford to be positive about everything because why not, everything went her way. But when Leah publicly accused Shelby of being a mole, after days of Shelby silently sucking up not just Toni’s ire but everyone’s, because of the homophobia, Shelby pretty understandably snapped and then left with that parting remark directly at Toni, you could see the shock and shame and concern:

It’s like...you know how you could vent at parents or maybe other adults or people online because you thought it didn’t really affect them and then once they reacted, not in anger but in hurt, it was like, oh shit, they’re an actual person? I feel like this is that moment for Toni. Where she realizes that, fine, as justified as her reaction about the homophobia may have been, she’s been hating on Shelby for a while for a bunch of things that aren’t her fault.

And then you can see, when she goes off to collect wood, I’m not even entirely surely it’s a coincidence that she finds Shelby, but she’s a lot nicer then than at any point before, making her own overtures and small talk. Enough for Shelby to reach out about the homophobia which Toni of course still firmly shut down, but not nearly as angrily as she might have on any other day. Seeing Shelby like that probably made her easier for a person like Toni to actually like, it changed the perceived perfection, that she had it all put together and felt nothing negative about herself. Toni was just so angry at all the various injustices committed against her and people like her, that a bit childishly, she was like, if you’re not outwardly suffering, you must have none of your own and are thus are someone who perpetuates them. And that mindset started to fall apart, more so when Shelby kissed her and she realized even the homophobia issue was soooo much more complex than she’d been thinking.

And of course her relatively mellow mood made Shelby all that much more talkative, rush to explain and defend herself. I think the arcs they went through, the pacing and how much they individually grew, and their place in the the plot, it was pretty perfect, that it had to culminate in that argument and desperate kiss in ep 7. I really like how the show handled them for the whole season and for sure, if they can continue to write for the characters as they have, I’m pretty excited to see what they’ll do in s2.

#took me a while to answer but I was thinking!#haven't completely given up this fandom for the expanse yet #but man the half-life of my fandoms seems to just be shrinking and shrinking #it's not even been a week since the wilds came out #replies #femslash related stuff #sent on 20201213 #Anonymous #the wilds spoilers #the wilds 1x07 #the wilds #shoni #toni shalifoe #shelby goodkind

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startwithbrooklyn · 3 years

Text

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / OCTOBER 2, 2019 // making the call

saved the last 2 minutes of this ep for tomorrow to keep on track so heres this

-i just realized laura never asked about the drive before she left last ep. wonder if she'll come back in s3 after tiffanys info finally comes into play

-"do you want to tell me why you think he'd be going after ryan?" wonder if carson thinks is joshua suspected the truth or found out about lucy having a baby and now hes all panicked

-"girl what is on your head??" 😂

-"it might help my dad's case" soooo i love how she said this. like. shes framing it so she can relate what she has to do to others. like she has to justify or give some reason for inviting someone else. she could have just said "im going if u want to come" but instead has to draw focus to her problem first, which is the only reason shes extending an invitation, if it relates to her own problems

-i wonder what lucy dying in the water has influenced her in telling nancy to call the agleaca. wonder if the agleaca found her and helped channel her spirit to apparition form. maybe she saw how lucy died "for love" wonder if the agleaca thought she was a fool or not for it. wonder if lucy would be strong enough to fight something like the agleaca, judging by simon probably not. it would have been cool to see a showdown between them or to watch lucy try to protect nancy from the beyond 😌 maybe the agleaca trying to take owen was her trying to give a warning? she was actually trying to "help" a la lucy/george's prediction was correct. sadly, we'll never know

-LOVE bess sitting criss cross on the bartop 😂and love the bess/owen cousins' call 🙏🏻💙

-this convo nancy has w owen at the police station reminds me of the kidnapping ep. when nick tries to help nancy she shoots him down. he tries to reason w her but unsuccessfully. what exactly is owen doing/saying differently? or is this just a reflection of how much nancy actually likes him? im just interested in the contrast. nick and owen both have calm, logical approaches. theyre both honest about wanting to be there for her. maybe the subject matter? in response to gombers warehouse nick was talking about facing old fears, which nancy definitely did do. but since nancy is primordially uninterested in discussing feelings, that was a no go. i think nancy even telling owen she was tracking a biotech ceo was a hugeconcession for her. or was it just because nick was inaccessable sexually but owen had potential? ¿ questions.

-LOVE owen side-eyeing nancy at this hilarity if a convo (and fucking Chad?? lmaoooo he is sostupid enough to fall for this probe)

-"i have to admit, that was kind of fun" / "i cant remember the last time i had this much fun" / "almost as fun as a real fight"

-"i got a D in french" well george if u retake it now you'll get a P instead 🤪

-"theres one more thing" so am i stupid or?? whats the second thing nick and ace have to tell her at the police station? that karen signed the form? bc nancy already figured that out so im confused.

-so karen in the security video is wearing the sweet purple pantsuit from the garden party ep which i checked the dates and yeah its about a month ago from today

-"i know the system favors the privileged" just imagine karen working her way up to detective as a young woman haunted by pain. and then her meeting the drews and nancy and having her remind karen of lucy, her cleverness, her spirit, but not knowing why. it just sucks bc in a male dominated field karen was trying to get justice and do good and then this happens

-"you tore two families apart" nancy's and tiffany's but this quote also applies to lucy's death tearing apart lucy's family (with her mom and josh) and ryan's (d/t not knowing nancy is his)

-UNPOPULAR OPINION: karen/josh - hatefuck- reuniting somehow (how did they reconnect? who called who?) when he gets back in town, come up with a plan, start an affair d/t their shared pain over lucy? then she fucks around with carson? why go there?

-"i loved your mom like a sister" / "i'm just glad my mom's not around to see who you've become" x2 now that we know the truth all these statements from karen especially just get heavier. like what bad luck to bond with two strong women who have to leave you like this (karen is a unique foil to nancy where they both have a connection to kate and lucy each)

-when ace says "i know nancy" thom just has this look on his face like "....oh youre in deep. sigh"

-hannah's disappearances "maybe she has nancys work ethic" in s2 she was shown out and about doing stuff and we know her burns were supernaturally caused but i wonder if hannah herself dabbles in anything else thet keeps her busy 🤔

-"300 pages about men and women get 2 pages in the back" 🙃preach

-i hate how in s2 they all forget this convo of nance literally saying "i cant ask you guys to do this" when they all blame her for every ill that ever happened ever

-THIS BITCH JUST PUTS HER BARE ASS HANDS ON HIS FUCKING OPEN WOUNDS???

-and it's snowing? in october? but only where they are by this part of the ocean?

-wait how does owen know bess sleeps in a van and does nothing about that?

-kissy faces😘😘see owen willing to meet nancy where shes at is soooo important. like him having his secret apartment in the city 👌🏻even tho she rejects him taking her out like he always wants he doesnt mind that he cant. hes not like nick- he doesnt mind being kept quiet (until bess's accidental reveal) his acceptance of her boundary there actually keeps him closer to her

and lastly

-george liking nick is so cute

#brooklyn's ND primer #nancy drew cw #the Great Rewatch of 2021 #you best start believing in ghost stories miss drew - you're in one

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probably-haven · 3 years

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what if- instead of spamming random shit on this blog that has nothing to do with anything at random points through the day like i do currently- i just- kept it in a draft- so I could only send one unrelated post a day- for instance:

i took one of them ‘which 5 star characters are you?” quizzes, but it was pretty obvious which character was which(I ended up with jean but thats not the point) The point is: One of the questions was “which best describes your personailty” and it was like two different descriptive words. BUT ONE OF THEM- hjdfkgfs “Prideful/penniless” LIKE PRIDE AND PREJUDICE WASN’T ENOUGH, ZHONGLI OUT HERE MAKING BROKE HIS ENTIRE PERSONALITY I WAS WHEEZING- LITERALLY- LIKE NORMALLY WHEN I SAY THAT I JUST MEAN “Yeah it was really funny and made laugh internally and i kinda smiled and maybe ‘exhaled’ more forcefully than average’ BUT NO I LITERALLY FUQQING WHEEZED- WHY??? LIKE- NO OBJECTIONS BUT WHY??? - wtf how did my comfort song go from treehouse to breezeblocks- spotify you removed a perfectly good song - 2 things that suck: siblings and math- i thought finishing calc would be the end of it- but no, i have to tutor them apparently- its consuming all my time bc they just-- cant- math??? an explanation once more for the lack of well thought out posts recently - being aro is so trippy because basic human kindness makes you question your entire identity - on second thought, breezeblocks probably became a comfort song because of that one Kaeya cosplayer on Tiktok... if you know which one I’m referring to, don’t @ me, i said nothing and i dont know what you’re talking about - wtf is a Xiao, everyone calls him a catboy which yeah, but he’s literally a bird??? does he have like- note to self: brainstorm Xiao with bird traits - sometimes i wish i could reblog more stuff, but i dont want to spam yall who follow me- - okay but why do i feel like Kaeya is the kind of person to just.... like... vent and poor his heart out to some random treasure hoarder he caught. like just- Kaeya: so i told him everything and he attacked me [le sniff] and that was how it happened Tied up treasure hoarder: oh dang, that’s rough man I’m so sorry Kaeya: yeah.... anyway, i have to kill you now - what is a Zhongli- I- do Zhongli kinnies exist? because I tried analyzing him earlier and i just- cant get in his headspace at all- Like my head sees a composed uppity character- and they could be the most complex shit but my dumbass brain will just go “lmao bitch got no personality” which no??? he has personality- it’s just- subtle- but try as I might my ND brain just- can’t pick up on the subtleties- like at all- - you know i wonder if everything is feels/sounds/looks muted or muffled to Venti- because his story mentions that because he made his form with anemo energy is why his alcohol tolerance is the way it is- so like- is everything just duller to him? or at least duller compared to how it would be in sprite form- - WAIT PARTIALLY BLIND VENTI IS A VIBE THO- like his hearing could be justified as normal if its greater in sprite form cuz wind- but the idea of - why does it fit??? like Toph’s tremorsense or whatever it’s called but with air---- - “mi muhe ye” means *le squint* wait did i read that right??? but really if their archon was partially blind it would give Mond a real good almost undeniable reason to create braille in Teyvat and i just think that’s lovely. - imma have to make headcanons for that eventually - but yeah, spam is entertaining - peace!

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iwritesickfic · 4 years

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boy who cried flu

(yes I am aware of how stupid this title is leave me alone)

Peter rarely - if ever - got sick. Nobody who didn’t know him well would believe it though - he had a long track record of absences and missed assignments, despite being a 3.9 GPA student. He’s flaked from social events and parties countless times, always citing he’s not “feeling well.” It’s not technically a lie, though he does lie sometimes.

People understand physical illness - they know what it feels like to be stuck in bed with a bad cold - but mental illness? Not so much. So...he bends the truth. A professor won’t be very forgiving if you say you spent all weekend in bed because you couldn’t find the motivation to move, but say you had a bad cough? No one bats an eye.

So most people assume Peter has an awful immune system. That or he’s just a pussy who won’t leave the house with so much as a sore throat. Everyone except a select few - Simon, Ashlynn, and Alex.

Simon’d been his friend since undergrad, and they’d been roommates for a time, so he knows exactly what Peter means when he says he “doesn’t feel well.” Ashlynn is the type to show up unannounced with a quart of homemade soup. And Alex...Alex was there when things had gotten out of hand.

But just because they knew he was lying when he said he was sick didn’t mean he stopped using it as an excuse. Ashlynn, despite herself, would usually not question it. Simon wouldn’t think twice about the lie, almost taking it as a direct confession. Alex would usually get pissed off and demand some kind of proof.

They were supposed to go to the beach tomorrow - get up early and take the train together to rockaway. But somehow, for the first time in years, Peter has something more than some congestion. Something way more.

It started a few days ago, a runny nose and swollen sinuses. He slept like shit, and the next morning his throat was raw and he absolutely could not breathe through his nose. But he had class, so he took the train in and sat in his lecture and tried to keep his sniffling to a minimum. By the time he was headed home, he’d long since run out of clean tissues, so he tends to his nose with a damp scrap of napkin he found buried in his bag, his nostrils red and irritated from the abuse.

By the time he gets home, his congestion has gone from a clogged, static brick in his head to leaky, runny mess, but he’s well aware he can’t take a day off from work on his thesis, so he sits in bed working until 2 AM, one hand wiping the mess from his upper lip, the other scribbling notes in his worn out pad.

He wakes the next morning not sure when he fell asleep, his head pounding heavily behind his eyes, sinuses throbbing and inflamed. His throat feels swollen and hot, and the relentless sneezing that started the night before isn’t helping any. The two days prior, everything seemed to be concentrated in his head, but now it’s clear it’s migrating into his chest as well. Halfway through his day at work in the library, he starts to cough, wet and harsh.

It doesn’t help that his body aches like he ran a marathon, and chills are coursing through him like ice water in his veins. By the end of the day he can’t wait to finally sit down and rest. His body’s been screaming for it since the moment he got out of bed, and all day shelving books has really taken its toll.

Unfortunately, he’s got an hour long commute and lucky for him, it’s standing room only. He grips the subway pole like a lifeline, his head spins every time the train rocks. He catches a glimpse of his reflection in the darkened window - he looks awful. Bags like bruises under his eyes that are rimmed in pink and half lidded, his nose irritated and red. A coughing fit tears through him, and he tries his best to catch it in his sleeve. His knees start to tremble as he tries to take deep breaths, and he’s startled when someone taps him on the shoulder.

“You wanna sit?” the woman asks, and it takes him a minute to realize she’s offering her seat. Normally, he’d suck it up, but he’s too miserable to refuse. He mumbles a thanks, and sinks down.

It takes all his self control not to fall asleep then and there.

By the time he’s back at his building, he’s seriously doubting he can climb four flights to get to the apartment. Part of him would rather just lay down in the lobby but he knows this is the final stretch before he can climb into bed and sleep.

He’s interrupted by several fits of coughs, and by the time he’s reached the fourth floor he’s practically gasping for air, and soaked in sweat. The chills he had all day have swapped with an oppressive heat that makes him feel almost lightheaded.

Somehow, he’s quite sure, he manages to stumble to bed, stripping off his damp clothes, the cool air on his slick skin throwing him back into shaking chills. Just as he’s about to let himself be sucked into sleep, his eyes fly open. Tomorrow. 6 AM. He’s supposed to go to the beach. There is no fucking way he is going to the beach.

He texts their group chat with trembling fingers.

hey im real sick i cant go tomorrow

There’s an immediate reply from Alex.

don’t fuckin do this man. we’re going.

A text from Simon.

you’ll feel better if you leave the house, you always do.

He sighs, cursing himself for using this shitty excuse so much now no one will take him seriously.

im serious i feel like trash

Alex answers immediately.

PETER. youre not sick youre being a pussy. we’re going to the fucking beach and we’re having a good time.

Simon responds.

chill alex.

if youre depressed thats fine but maybe consider coming still it might help.

i mean i’d feel better if you came

Peter groans.

im sick. like sick sick. like flu sick.

Alex shoots back quickly.

ok then what are your symptoms?

Peter rubs his eyes, trying to relieve some of the throbbing.

fever, chills, aches, cough, runny nose, headache, tired.

There’s a moment of silence and he places his phone on his bedside table with a sigh. He’s about to go under when his phone starts to buzz. Once. Twice. Three times. He swears, grabbing it. Three texts from Alex. The first is a screenshot of the symptom list that appears when you google “flu” which just happens to be in identical order.

you need to be more creative

seriously man im not letting you miss this. we planned this months ago. dont be a dick.

Finally, Ashlynn chimes in.

you dont need to lie p, its ok if you dont wanna come.

While Peter would like to further argue that he’s not in fact lying, he just doesn’t have the energy. At this point, it doesn’t matter what they think. He’s not going - who gives a shit why? He’s able to fall asleep almost immediately, but unfortunately, he doesn’t really stay asleep.

He wakes up about every 45 minutes, coughing or shivering or burning or all three. After his fourth or fifth jolt awake he can’t for the life of him seem to get any rest. Every time he’s about to drift off, another coughing fit explodes from his chest and leaves him trembling. He’s hot, but he’s not sweating, which he realizes vaguely must mean he’s dehydrated. As the night wears on and his condition continues to worsen, he wonders if he should call an uber to take him to the ER. He can’t afford it, not in the slightest, but he’s not sure he’s ever felt this terrible before. Somehow, he remembers there’s an old thermometer in the kitchen. An old roommate had bought it thinking it would work for deep frying but didn’t realize the range only spanned from 95 to 107.

He needs to take his temperature. See how serious this actually is. He can’t remember the last time he actually ran a fever, so he’s not sure if this is just par for the course or whether this level of misery is cause for alarm.

He stumbles into the kitchen, and for once he’s glad to live in such a god-awfully tiny studio. He lands heavily against the counter, and rummages through the drawer to find the small device. After what feels like an eternity, he manages to grab it with shaking hands, fumbling with the buttons for a moment before flipping on the small kitchen light.

He sticks it under his tongue, it feels like ice. He tries to coach himself on what he’s going to do. If it’s over 100, he’ll go to the hospital. No, that’s too low. 102?Still maybe too ambitious of a goal. It’s then he realizes he’s really just trying to justify what he’s going to do anyway - save himself an ER bill and stay in bed. He’s jerked out of his thoughts when the small device beeps and he removes it carefully from under his tongue.

The display flashes 103.2. He doesn’t really know what that means but after a quick google search it’s not exactly any clearer. It’s bad, but not bad enough to cause brain damage, supposedly. Fuck it, that’s good enough for him. He climbs shakily back into bed, the small excursion has left him absolutely exhausted.

He needs medicine. He knows that. Some tylenol at the very least, but if he can barely walk to the kitchen he doesn’t know how in hell he’s getting out the door, down the stairs, to the pharmacy, and back again. So, he’ll just have to live with it.

He spends the rest of the night in and out of half-sleep, each coughing fit seeming to drive the illness deeper into his lungs. His nose has started to run again, and each rub with the already-used tissue makes his poor sensitive nostrils burn in protest.

The next morning he wakes to the harsh, deafening drone of his apartment’s buzzer system. He cracks his eyes and checks the time. 6:42 AM. Whoever the fuck it is can wait, he’d like to suffer in peace. Still, as he tries to slip back into the sleep the buzzer continues to go off and after about five minutes, he sits up in bed, fighting the wave of dizziness that washes over him. He stumbles to the keypad and presses the button that opens the lobby door, and the buzzing finally - mercifully - ceases.

He grabs a t shirt from a pile on the floor and pulls on a pair of boxers - he doesn’t know if he’d be able to stand anything more with the way his fever is raging. He sits on the edge of his bed, trying to catch his breath, quickly breaking down into another awful fit of coughs. Just as he’s finished, he hears a heavy knock on the door. Sighing, he forces himself up, padding slowly over to the door, trying not to aggravate the dizziness any further. He pulls open the door and is confused to see not an overzealous delivery person, but his three friends.

He stares dumbly for a moment before a breath catches in his throat and he breaks into thick, wet coughs. He sniffles, wiping his nose with his wrist, before looking back up at them.

“What?” he mumbles, and there’s an awkward silence.

“Shit,” Alex finally says and Peter sniffles.

“What do you want?” he repeats, surprised at the hoarse, broken quality of his voice. Does he really sound that bad? Ashlynn pushes forward, wrapping him in a tight hug. She’s short, so her face is pressed into his chest, and he stumbles back slightly.

“Oh Peter,” she whispers, and he swallows, closing his eyes. She pulls away, and he has to force them open again. She she presses a hand to his forehead. Her palm feels cool but uncomfortable against his oversensitive skin. “You’re burning up.”

“I know,” he murmurs, wishing the conversation could be over so he can go lie down and not have to explain himself to his friends. He sighs, and narrowly avoids another coughing fit. “Are you gonna come in or you just all gonna stand there?” They exchange looks. “Well?”

Ashlynn pushes past him, followed by Simon and finally Alex. Peter shuts the door and tries his best not to look as fucked up as he feels walking to sit in one of his kitchen chairs.

“What do ya’ll want?” he asks Simon and Alex, Ashlynn already digging through the medicine cabinet.

“We don’t want anything we were just concerned,” Simon says.

“Then why do you look so fucking shocked?” Peter snaps, even though he knows Simon is only telling the truth.

“Because I was 100% sure you were bullshitting,” Alex says. Peter is far too tired to get into a verbal sparring match with Alex, but he tries halfheartedly anyway.

“Still sure?” before Alex can reply Ashlynn is back with a damp washcloth and the thermometer he’d used the night before. She lays the cloth on the back of his neck, and he can’t help the small whine that escapes.

“Open,” she says, and he does. She places the thermometer under his tongue gingerly, and strokes some of his hair off his forehead. “You don’t have anything? For this?” Peter shakes his head. She presses her lips into a line. “Simon and me are gonna go out and grab some stuff, ok?”

“That’s not necessary.” His voice is almost slurred with the fever, and as if on cue the thermometer beeps. Ashlynn frowns at the reading. She shakes her head.

“Christ, Peter.” She touches his forehead again, this time with the back of her hand. “103.6 and it’s not necessary?”

“I don’wanna be lectured.”

“I’m not lecturing.” She spends another moment fussing with his hair before getting up, grabbing Simon. “We’re going to get some stuff, we’ll be back. Alex, make sure he doesn’t die, ok?” It’s clear Alex is about to protest, but Ashlynn levels him with a glare. They leave, and then it’s just Peter and Alex.

Alex stands by the door, hands in his pockets. It’s a while before either of them speaks.

“What was I supposed to think?” he finally says, and Peter tries to swallow his anger.

“I don’t know, man.” He runs a hand through his greasy, sweat damp hair. He starts to shiver again, wrapping his arms around his torso. Alex takes a careful step forward.

“You get why I wouldn’t believe you, right?”

“Yes, Alex.” The chills are now back in full force, he’s sure he must be shaking like a leaf. He wants nothing more than this conversation to be over, but Alex doesn’t seem to be getting to message.

“You never get sick. Ever. So what am I-”

“I get it. It’s fine. Just...stop talking. Please.” He’s shaking so bad he can feel his teeth chattering. He pulls his knees to his chest. He closes his eyes, praying something - anything - will warm him up. He hears footsteps and fumbling, then feels a dry, warm blanket being tucked around his shoulders. He looks up, and Alex is standing there, eyebrows furrowed.

“Do you wanna lay down or something?” The thought of climbing back into his sweat damp sheets makes him cringe, so he shakes his head. “Why not?”

“S’gross, I sweat a ton.”

Alex nods.

“Right. What about the couch? You can lay on the couch and I can do your laundry.”

Getting horizontal sounds heavenly, so he nods, and Alex touches his shoulder, quickly pulling his hand back.

“What the fuck - dude, you’re like...on fire. Shit.” He tests the side of his neck and winces. “Fuck.”

“Can you just help me?” Peter is embarrassed at how small and sick his voice sounds, and the fact he’s asking Alex of all people for help, but he knows if he tries to do it on his own he’s going to fall and crack his skull.

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” He wraps an arm around Peter’s waist, and supports him the few feet to the couch. It’s not very far but his knees go weak about halfway there and he’s glad Alex is holding him. As soon as he gets onto the couch, he curls on his side and closes his eyes. “You’re ok?” Peter nods, and Alex pats his shoulder awkwardly. “Ok. Cool. Just...stay there, I guess.” Peter can hear him starting to strip the bed.

“I was maybe gonna go for a run,” he mumbles, and Alex laughs softly.

“Definitely. Then I’ll enroll at NYU for my bachelor’s.”

“You’re just jealous you don’t have all my debt.”

“You’re right. I’ve been trying to rack up some credit card bills but so far no luck.”

Peter opens his eyes to see Alex with the bundle of sheets in his arms and the bottle of detergent. He pauses for a second, shifting from foot to foot.

“I’m sorry,” he says, and Peter swallows hard.

“I know man, it’s ok.” Alex smirks.

“Alright. Don’t die while I’m gone.”

#sickfic #oc fic #sick fic #sickfics #illness kink #snz #snz kink #fever #my writing #oc peter #oc alex #oc ashlynn #oc simon #this is probably part one lets be honest

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kazbrekkerrs-remade · 4 years

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ekrjhak i lov eu and to further enable you: ur thoughts on blue, gansey, ronan and adam and henry? and their group dynamic????? 👀👀👀

Wow this took me ages sorry dfjfhd. Claire... u enable me too much these are my onions <3. Under a cut because I went. overboard :3. I’m probably going to have to shorten this I don’t know if tumblr will even let me post something this long dkshjfhg. (Also I wrote half of this in word so if there’s proper capitalization in places that’s why, don’t let it cloud my image as a cool, laid-back bitch that doesn’t care for grammar.)

i’m starting individually then moving onto group dynamics heh

blue i like blue but it did take a bit of growing on me djjdjhjss. i like her a lot bc i relate to her a lot, but i do think there was a lot of room for improvement. she said she wanted to see the world and make it better but how exactly.. is that a roadtrip? i mean i guess it’s a start in a way, but i think it would’ve been much better if we saw her join an activist organization.. volunteer for a non-profit or something. Also her misguided feminism ah! But I can be a bit more lenient with that bc she was still very young when the series ended so. Also she was revealed to be part tree and then like. Nothing substantial came of it? idk

Ganseyboy! I have to be honest my.. fave uwu. There is a Lot of room for improvement but I just. Optimist!! insecurities :( also he KNEW he was gonna d*e I’m. sad. Anyway like I said a lot of room for improvement as in like.. not everything is about you king <3 also he needs more… idk I don’t wanna say empathy bc i think that’s something different but like. He needs to realise that what he thinks is best isn’t gonna be the way everyone deals with something, if that makes sense? Like basically the “how do you know what’s good for me?” “THAT’S MY OPINIOOONNNNN!!” vine. THAT SAID I love him so much.. he held up the mouse to his face! And smiled!! mon dieu.. when he made bird jokes to make adam laugh… “am I in your dreams?” AH! In a way, blue and gansey are sons of the same gun: I love them both but there could be more done with them tbh. But I have a lot of fun with Fansey, a.k.a: fatima gansey. Kind of like fanon gansey except no one’s opinion matters besides mine <3 (basically it’s the *aggressively kicks off shoes* “yee haw”, parts of gansey, and then me giving him the arc he deserves) maybe we could sum it up to “ma’am that’s my emotional support projection character” but like. That’s my business.

ADAM! Previous endorsements include: “might fuck around and become an adam parrish stan account.” “I’ve only had adam for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.” “I go :D whenever I see it’s an adam chapter” (these are more or less verbatim from my previous posts.) that said, I don’t have many fully formed thoughts because I uhhh don’t remember the books that well and also I repress the adam chapters bc they hit too close oops :). tbh I don’t have many complaints at all heh. That’s not to say he doesn’t have flaws but a) I will excuse them because he’s justified, adam does anything problematique and I’m like he can have a little murder. As a treat. and b) I genuinely loved his arc so. No complaints for real!! Also.. adam realising he is capable of loving and being loved…. *kermit meme* I have nearly teared up while writing this. :( one more half baked thought: trc having being “known” as a mark of being loved but then adam being like “i am unknowable” and then there was a moment of him with ronan like “how foolish of him to think he was unknowable”.... *kermit hearts meme intensifies*

RONAN O CLOCK to be honest. I. don’t have any meta or complaints I just love him. I love him a LOT okay.. very much. Big love. Sharp edges tough guy but he names his dream animals chainsaw and gasoline and has a pooping blanket for chainsaw… I can’t remember the quote but that but in cdth where he was like the point is dreamer or not if people are going to get hurt I’m going to stop it… Much to think about. HIS GROWTH. IN THE DREAM THIEVES wow can you believe I read him in TRB and was like ‘I don’t care for him’ ddhfjdhf and then in the dream thieves I’m like.. I have rescinded all previous callouts of ronan lynch. Oops. HE LOVES HIS FRIENDS SO MUCH oh my gosh. Ronan just… he has so much range for feeling!! he feels so much!!! I love that about him so much omg

Henry. Ah. This is where we get kind of controversial jdhjdfh I’m sorry but. I’m going to be honest I like him well enough as a character but I don’t care for him much I’m sorry I just. It’s because he was introduced so late. And only became an important character towards like.. the last half of TRK? I mean, I’d have loved him if he was introduced earlier, hell at least have him come into play in BLLB. The issues I have with him isn’t because of anything about him as a character though, I think it’s all about the way he was handled. I think because he came in so late, there just wasn’t enough time to do justice to the depth that he had, or give him an arc or anything, or enough time to connect with him. Also a part of me feels like he was in there just to kind of tie up Blue and Gansey’s stories and give them something to do after the end of TRK (which sucks because like… making your only canon POC being primarily to develop/give your white characters storylines… (blue isn’t white in my mind but like she was written “colorblind” and when that happens it usually means the author viewed them as white at least in the beginning jhfhgfj. but i don’t remember it too well so if i’m wrong lmk please!)). But probably my biggest problem is: I couldn’t help get the vibe that MS was facing criticism for the lack of diversity and so decided to bring in an asian character. Like, I feel that way bc he came in so late, and because of that he was so half-baked I’m.. gah. GAH. That’s unfair maybe henry is a cool dude hdhfg but I just can’t warm up to him because of this :/

Group dynamics!! With the gangsey I have to *sobs* I love them so much I’m.. what a strange constellation they all were <3

blue and ronan!! BROnan amirite… omg. That moment when blue nearly slips and ronan immediately catches n holds on to her… she would have to remember that :( sons of the same gun. Best friends!

Blue and adam.. gah. As friends it really goes hard. Get you someone who will stab you if you fall too deep into the nether-realm <3 but uhh. As dates. YIKES. Blue really just. Kissed noah while dating him. And didn’t even think for a second “I have a bf” :( not very cool of her to tell gansey about the kiss curse but not telling adam which I mean, I know that happened to show that they weren’t a good match but. Still yikes. Blue was lowkey cheating on adam the whole time during tdt huh :( also bro I am number one stan of the “I wish you could be kissed jane” scene but it happened literally RIGHT AFTER she broke up with adam I’m. relax <3. I wish that was kind of addressed but meh, overall it doesn’t bother me too much. I think they’re great friends :)

Ronan and adam… I can’t talk about it too much. I really can’t!! I really really can’t! the fact that adam goes to gansey like what is love and gansey is like she makes me quiet… and then adam is like “he was so still inside”.. :( omg the bit during trb when ronan is going on a swearing tirade and adam is like “they didn’t start making the civic until ‘73 <3” what a JACKASS I love him. Second secret!! --okay! Wait I have to say: while this one is not really a big deal compared to all their other moments, my favourite quote is “ and he realised that while he’d been looking at ronan, ronan had been looking at him” :uwu face:

Blue and gansey: :3 :33333 maybe it’s the muslim but I really like the tragedy of not being able to kiss :( I would beg just one off you! Under all this! Maybe I’m crying because of the inherent romantic-ness of the night sky with all its stars and late night drives :( wow I love them. Also i know most people find it annoying but I personally love the “I’m never gonna fall for this person” *fast forward to getting to know each other* “ahahah. :) I have rescinded all callouts of ____. she is now my girlfriend (long story)” (not to be confused with enemies to lovers <3 (not to be confused with enemies to friends to lovers <3)) also they can kiss now thank you very much.

Okay I will just preface this with: gansey’s relationships with both ronan and adam have the “how do you know what’s good for me” element to them so I don’t have to address it later hdfgjlfj but bro they love each other so much I’m… “dream me the world… something new for ever night” you’re leaving for TWO DAYS.. gansey gave up monmouth omg what became of that I really forgot khffhk did he get it back. I don’t even need to elaborate on ronan, “ronan would do anything for gansey” :(

ADAM AND GANSEY I been WAITNG for this one! Turn it up! Bro if you saw the whole face I made when I realised it was time for this kdhfhfkhu this is so loaded despite the fact that I cant articulate it <3 the.. idk what to call them. Parallels? Foils? I didn’t take lit sorry but he RANGE we could have had there… remember when gansey was shocked in trk bc :0 you guys came with me and also “they had run for him”. bro their whole relationship had so much. Tension because of their different backgrounds and fundamentally different outlooks because of their backgrounds, and I think if we had seen them properly connect then both of them could have grown from that. I know we see adam understanding gansey a bit better I don’t remember when that happened but I know it did at some point hhdsf but gansey.. never does! Huff and puff. It’s really so FRUSTRATING to me bc that could have key development for gansey but also for adam and gansey’s relationship. And also I feel like we didn’t.. see them try either? Which is so frustrating like idk if it’s a fault on stiefvater’s part or just with YA lit in general that platonic relationships are kind of ignored. Or maybe it’s because idk I remember ms saying she had a lot of issues while writing trk.. but still. We could have really had it all but instead I have to live with “don’t break him adam” I’m (: ok but now I must lighten the mood hjsdhf so might I add: when one of them sees the principal in his crazy funky junky hat and goes “yee haw”… when gansey is like :DDD hey ADAM guess WHAT and adam is like ? and gansey is like oh it was a fully casual problem with the ALTERNATOR of my car of COURSE it was the alternator, it was really simple and I fixed it with much ease :D and adam is like :’D felt like the had hatched a baby bird.. my uwus. ADAM! give me an idea! ALSO if anyone will allow me to venture into adansey territory…. the fact that adam is cabeswater’s magician and gansey now.. is cabeswater in a way. MUCH to think about. I still spend a lot of time thinking about the dryad au the problem is I have never been to progress past the “vague concept” stage of stories and this is why I don’t write dhfjhfdhf. But yes. I think about it often :3

i also like the henry with the gang, i think it could work really well but once again it wasn’t given the time for me to really see it :( also. ronan being racist. and adam laughing along with that. why was that included, ms turn on your location i just wanna talk

okay once again thank you for enabling me claire and i’m so sorry for this monster dsjkhfjkdhg

#aha. am i more than you bargained for yet <3 #claire tag #asks #mutuals #anyway if for some reason you ever wanted a comprehensive guide on my thoughts on the trc characters here it is <3 #though it's not really comprehensive kjhdsjkhfg #when i reread trc. and remember it this time. then you will know #anyway this took me three weeks sdhfkjdfh sorry

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dorminchu · 4 years

Text

ereani 30 day otp wip - timeskip au, nsfw

a tentative successor to 07, old soul on young shoulders. ponytail eren and his brooding attitude make a return, as does the raging sexual tension between him and the Scouting Legion's newest pawn. Possibly a fugitive fic. Roleplay also comes back, except it's a bit more deliberate? Working title is 13. given no quarter. Sauciness under the cut.

01.

He can't find it in himself to regret his decision entirely. Annie was and still is an enemy soldier — and he's not a boy blinded by loyalty. If they end up going their separate ways he will not fault her. If they cross paths after that, he'd invariably end up cutting her down, no room for doubts.

He supposes that he could've been nicer, but what would that prove besides his own uncertainty? There's no sense in getting too attached, after all; she's made a name for herself with the Legion. He could have surely been a Captain, if not for his war crimes in Marley.

She's deigned to hear him out when no one else would try — and he has repaid her hesitation with a quick fuck and a ploy. He doesn't feel much point in justifying it, now that it's done — expressing whatever sentiments he'd retained that couldn't be put into words, laid now (he tells himself) to rest.

Why else would she accept his offer to go AWOL (check term), if not to let his guard down?

He isn't sure he would have felt the same way about mercy, in her position. That said, he isn't about to make the same mistake twice.

When he puts it in these terms, he really doesn't have much of an advantage. She's the one in a position of authority, despite her prior reputation. He is the deserter, the boy who once showed promise as a martyr and a fairly accomplished soldier turned rogue. If it weren't for the fact he's got some of the guards under his thumb, they'd in a hell of a lot more trouble.

At the same time, he'd forgotten the simple intimacy of just… being close to another person, with no intent to harm.

Life resumes, almost as though the whole fiasco had never happened in the first place. The cell is quiet. He doesn't have much evidence to prove himself it happened, save the more obvious minutia; more prominently, a scuff on the stone floor where he'd shunted the bed.

02.

Annie raises her hips. There's no need to waste his breath. It's a temporary escape from the hell they live in, nothing more.

He might've been kinder when he was a boy. He isn't as brusque upfront as last time, but he is efficient, getting her close, unable to come. He lays her back down on the bed — his bed, he thinks — grappling her hips and arse, drawing his tongue out to kiss her instead.

When she does come, and it doesn't take too much after that build-up, he does not stop, only slows; Annie's caught off guard on her back, makes these long dragging gasps that give way to moaning, clenching on nothing.

She's trying to get her legs up over him, but he'd thought of that too, handling the small of her back, tipping her waist up to get a better go of it. She can only do so much from this point.

"You — idiot," she rasps, "c-come up here'n — u-ungh."

Eren grunts indistinctly, pausing to slant his mouth over her clit. Annie's hips jerk, she gasps, "Shit!" and pretty soon she's panting harder, saying, Eren, Eren.

"Once more," he tells her, "you can handle that, can't you."

"Yes," she shudders.

"Yes, what?"

She collects herself, still breathy. "Sir."

He shifts his weight, tries to catch his breath himself.

"You enjoy this, sir."

He looks up. "What, this?"

She tries to scowl but she's flushed, glassy eyed. "Don't play dumb."

"No, go on. What else do you want me to do to you?"

Annie takes a little breath. "Lie on your back. I'll ride you first. Then you can fuck me."

He gives her a smile, a real one. "Oh yeah?"

"Eren," she hisses, squeezing her legs around his shoulders.

He swats at her thigh. "That won't help you."

"Fuck, sir," she grits, "let me ride you."

He licks his lips. "How can I be sure you'll behave?"

Annie reclines herself, hands splayed at his pelvis, feigning disillusionment. "I—I've been good, haven't I."

"Yeah." He sits up. "I want to be sure."

Her eyes narrow. "You talk too much."

"Yeah," he says again. "But I promised you this much. Go on. Ride me."

Annie stares at him. She shifts over to his chest, on her knees. He grasps the meat of her thighs and doesn't wait for her to settle, licks in like he's been waiting for this moment since the very start. Annie sucks in a breath and starts grinding in earnest. Pretty soon she's all he can smell or taste. He's lucky he has a firm grip on her legs. She starts to tremble when she's close, legs clamp down like he's going to slip away somehow.

When she does come, with a shout and her body turned rigid, he holds her in place, laps at her until he can hear the frantic noises she's making. He doesn't give her a minute, or half that much; if he doesn't make good on his word he's going to come in his pants and ruin the point of this entirely. He kicks off his trousers and pulls her into his lap, buries himself in one clean thrust. Her breath sticks in her throat and she moans his name again.

"That won't help you," he says harshly.

Annie's eyes flutter, wide. "Fuck me, sir," she pants.

Eren gauges this, cupping under her arse. Annie cants herself back and takes him in inches.

"Gonna fuck yourself, instead?" he pants.

The familiar light returns to her eyes. "Whatever you like, sir."

He grunts. "Go ahead. You've earned that much."

Annie looks confused again. "E—sir."

"I can't last forever, you know. You don't start movin', and I'll have to do this all by myself."

"Hm?"

"'Yeah, I might just pull out right now," he squeezes her hips, "an' come in your mouth."

It had sounded a lot better in his head. Annie seems to take this in stride, grinds herself back against him until he's deeper. "Ah. That so?"

He thrusts up, hits something that makes her hiss. "I'll put you over the cabinet and eat you all over again if you don't hurry up. You want that?"

Now Annie looks a little struck. She cants her hips and says, with deliberate discipline: "Next time."

Eren groans. "Shit, Annie."

"I don't want it nearly as much as you." She's smirking, though. He's so relieved to see a recognisable response from her.

"O.K., Leonhardt."

She huffs. "Goddam it. You're not even — hah."

"Hm? What — should I do?" She's gnawing her lip, working herself over. Eren tries to keep up with her but it's almost too much after all that waiting, and all the noises he's pulled out of her. He can hear how wet she is every time she pulls back and he's about five seconds away from rolling them over and giving her what she wants.

#attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #eren jaeger #annie leonhardt #ereani #ereannie #aot #snk #fanfic #fanfiction #wip #not sfw

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17caratfics · 5 years

Note

69+57 jeonghan: where you were having a really really really bad day and cant wait to come home to home to him and be smothered with his love and also some sexy rough sex uwu thank you hehe so i guess its a mix of everything? angstu fluffy smutt??? - requested by wngjr

69. “We need to talk.”57. “Just get home as soon as possible, okay?”

Warning: Explicit Content

The article you saw on your phone was the absolute last straw and it took nearly all of your willpower to smile through the last set of photos and not break down. You knew that it was inevitable. Models were always scrutinized and there were constantly so-called fashion critics who seemed to know better and had the sharp tongues to pass along their belief.

The latest article was one of doubt, doubt that you could be the new leading face for a global brand because you had just started in the industry and wasn’t considered a universal beauty. You had unique features that worked well with clothing and a bright smile that seemed out of place on the runway but had still had the fashion designers fawning all over you, desperate to have someone different represent them.

And yet, despite all this, being a newbie and being different meant that you often got the cold shoulder from your colleagues and disbelieving smirks from photographers whenever you made a minor mistake. Normally, you used your optimism and self-confidence to make it through the difficulties but today has been particularly awful.

You spent the whole day going from shoot to shoot, almost running late because the photographers decided to change their schedules and conveniently “forgot” to tell your manager. By the time you arrived, you had been subjected to berating comments and justified anger. To make matters worse, you couldn’t find the right size clothing and had to resort to shoots that required artistic covering.

The busy day passed in a blur and you forgot to have lunch, only eating when your assistant shoved an apple in your hand. The article came out right in the middle of a particularly difficult shoot and immediately, on set, someone had passed it out, subjecting you to obvious ridicule.

There was a ping and a notification lit up your screen. “Baby, we need to talk.” You didn’t know why but the text from your boyfriend had your stomach sinking and you tossed your phone in your bag, fearing the worst.

When finally, the cameras were off and you were changed into your normal wear, you had the courage to pick up your phone only to see three missed calls. What could be so urgent that Jeonghan had to call you this many times?

“Hello?”

“Oh thank goodness,” and all was better when you heard the relief evidence in his voice. It mustn’t be anything too terrible if he was worried about you. “I was on the computer, all excited to read the new article, and I’m so angry at what they said about you. But I’m just worried that you’re going to take it too hard.”

“So you read it too,” you responded thickly. The unshed tears clogged your nose and made your voice hoarse. It was too painful to say more.

“Love, you know that you were chosen by the stockholders of the brand, and who else wants to make more money than them? If they didn’t think you would be making them money, would they choose you? Besides, I love you, and even if you don’t have the high cheekbones and the thin lips, or whatever, I still love you. You’re still the most beautiful woman in the world to me and I can’t wait for the whole damn world to see.”

Shortly into his soliloquy, you were already crying. There really was nobody else better in this world than Jeonghan. Suddenly, all you wanted was to be in his arms again and have him shield you from the world’s ugly gaze with his strong arms and soft kisses.

“Just get home as soon as possible, okay?” You sniffed an assent and blew him a kiss. It took a few deep breaths to calm down and you patted at the tears on your cheeks, willing them to dry before he saw you.

Jeonghan had candles and your favorite cinnamon buns on the counter when you walked in. You inhaled deeply and he picked one up and brought it to you. “I figured you haven’t eaten yet so take this for now. I ordered take out.”

You bit into the sweet treat gratefully and he watched you devour it before taking your hips in his hands and placing a chaste kiss on your lips. “Mmm, so sweet. Come, lets take a shower and get you all de-stressed.”

He had set up a warm bath and you slid into the water only to have him kneel behind you and bring his hands to your shoulders. “Join me?”

Jeonghan chuckled and placed a kiss on the nape of your neck. “I still have to get the food.”

You let out a slight pout but closed your eyes and allowed him to pamper you. His fingers kneaded at the knots on your shoulders and traveled down your back and towards your breasts. You twisted your head to kiss him and he chuckled, letting you brush your lips across his jaw and his cheeks as he continued to touch you gently.

A deep heat was building up in you and you shifted in the water, desperate for more. The rude vibration from his phone on the sill of the bathtub interrupted you and you sighed as he pulled away. “Food’s here. Do you want to rinse off and join me?”

He gave you a lingering smile as you pouted up at him but nodded anyway. Jeonghan chuckled and blew you a kiss. “I’ll see you downstairs, babe.”

Moments later, you slid on a robe and joined him in the dining room. He had an array of pasta and soups spread and you looked for the salad but he tsked. “Definitely no healthy food today. It’s all about self-care tonight.”

You let out a bright smile as you dug into the carbonara, enjoying for the first time that day, the warmth of food. “Thank you, Jeonghan.”

He clinked his glass of white wine at you and winked. “Of course, sweetheart. Anything for you.”

After the food has been cleared, you stretched your arms out towards him and he chuckled as you made your way over. You engulfed him in a hug and placed your head against his shoulders. The steady beating of his heart calmed you and you stifled a yawn.

“Tired already?” You looked up at him to see him with a slightly raised eyebrow and an amused grin dancing across his lips.

“Not particularly, just happy.”

“Good, that’s the point.”

Memories of what was supposed to happen earlier lingered in your mind and you placed a kiss against his chest, kissing until you found his nipple through his thin shirt. Your hand reached down to palm him and you smiled happily at the groans leaving his mouth.

Taking greater liberty to reach down his pants and stroke him, you pressed closer and felt his grip tighten around you. “Alright, let’s get you to bed, you little vixen.” He picked you up and you jumped into his ready arms, allowing him to carry you down the hallway to your bedroom.

The moment your back hit the bed, he was on top of you, removing his shirt and tugging at his sweatpants. You undid the belt of your robes and he moaned at the sight of you. “You’re so pretty,” he whispered.

You closed your eyes and enjoyed his soft kisses and gentle touches on your skin. Just as he pressed a kiss to your pulse point, you opened your eyes and looked at him. “Jeonghan, fuck me please. Hard.”

At first he seemed surprised, probably wanting to pamper you to end off the day. But at your request, he smirked and sucked harshly on your neck, hard enough to hurt but not quite enough to leave a telling mark. His hands parted your thighs easily and he settled himself between you.

He ran the tip of his cock up and down your folds, pressing into your clit and watching you arch your back. Your lips opened and he pulled you up onto your knees and he grabbed onto your hair. “Suck.”

You whimpered around his cock, desperate for more. You ran your tongue over his head and licked a line down his shaft, taking more of him in as you went. When he finally hit the back of your throat, you let out a moan and his grip on your head became tighter. Jeonghan gave you a few minutes to adjust before thrusting his hips into your mouth, allowing his cock to hit the back of your mouth each time.

You swallowed a little, gagging and choking, but desperate for more. Your legs spread and the hand that wasn’t steadying you against his hips went between them to touch yourself. You were so wet that sliding in two fingers at once wasn’t difficult.

He watched as you touched yourself and sucked him off, the tears running down your cheeks and the shivers of pleasure and kept whispering praises. The compliments boosted your confidence, long trod on in the industry you were in, and you brought your fingers to his mouth, wanting him to clean you off.

He laid you down gently and complied. You watched his tongue swirl around your fingers and desperately wanted his tongue on you. “Baby,” you whimpered. Jeonghan knew exactly what you wanted but wanted to hear you. “Can you eat me out?”

He let out a hum of satisfaction and inched down to suck on your clit. He lapped at your juices and brought two fingers into you, widening them to spread you out. You gasped from the pleasure and was soon cumming on his tongue and fingers, your hands buried deep into his hair and back arching off the sheets.

After you shook and tried to pull away, he chuckled and wrapped your legs around his waist. He slid inside you easily and, remembering your request, started thrusting into you hard. You let out tiny screams as the sensitivity from your previous orgasm and the beautiful pleasure of every thrust had the desire burning in the pit of your stomach again.

Jeonghan was merciless, taking you from behind and grabbing your hips to steady you as he plowed into you. You buried your head into the pillows, needing the release. He bit a mark into your shoulders and you clenched around him, desperate for one more orgasm.

When he had you on your back again, his thumb found your clit and you cupped his face. “Cum inside me,” you told him, wanting to feel him fill you and to be filled with every part of him.

“Fuck,” he let out a tiny groan and rubbed at your clit, eager to have you come undone first. When you began to shake and whine, he gave a few more rapid thrusts before stilling and moaning. He placed a hand on your stomach and rubbed you as he filled you and your eyes fluttered closed.

He gently laid on top of you and you wrapped your arms around him, holding him to you as he stayed inside you. “I love you,” you whispered, blessed to have him.

“I love you too, my super model,” he chuckled as he pressed a kiss to your cheek.

#jeonghan #Seventeen #kpop smut #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #seventeen smut #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #jeonghan scenarios #Smut #drabble game

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anxietysroomsupport · 4 years

Note

Tonight me and my friend said bye bc it's summer and she wont be able to talk to me anymore since school ended and the only way we were able to contact each other were through emails when school was in session bc her parents are very abusive. Fuck. I know I'm gonna talk to her after summer but that's a really long time. I know she doesnt depend on me to keep her confidence up but I left for 5 days and she started believing the terrible shit they say about her 1/2

2/2 and I jsut cant imagine all that they're gonna do and say to her over two months. I feel so powerless sand I dont mean to make this about me bc it's her who is in such a shitty situation but I cant do anything to stop them from making her feel that way she does. I want to consentually kidnap her and hide her in my room forever. I fuckign hate her parents so much. She believes all of the bullshit they tell her and she cant see how much of an amazing person she is 2/3

3/3 how can a person treat another person so amazing and outstanding like her the way they do? I cant believe its gonna be over 2 months until I get to talk to her again. So many things can happen. Again I dont mean to make this all about me and I'm sorry that that's what I'm doing but I really need to rant. And all the shit they put her through she tries to justify it because they love her. But they dont. They're doing what they're doing for their own selfish reason 3/4

4/4 and I wish I could make her see that. She knows what her parents are doing is wrong but i dont think she has a full grasp on that yknow. If i ever see her parents i swear I'm gonna fuckign deck them both when she's safe. And i dont blame her btw. Her parents are manipulative shits and it isnt her fault that she gives in to what they're saying but it's not right. And all of this bc shes bi. They were abusive before but now it's so much worse 4/5

5/5 and people try and justify abuse by saying homosexuality is wrong as if this isnt happening to an actual fuckign person (I knwo abuse isnt just happening to queers but it is in this situation). Shes liek a literal prisoner there. She has to be with someone at all times of the day and she isnt allowed in her room. The only she allowed to be alone is the bathroom and changing. I honestly dont know how shes gonna survive (sorry I'm writing a lot) 5/6

6/6 she said she wont commit suicide and I trust her but I cant entirely rule it out so if she makes it through these two months without human contact except for her abusive parents and her passive siblings who just dont care then I think she's going to be so broken the next time I get to talk to her. I mean jsut hearing the things they say to her over and over again for months and not having anybody you can talk to who shares the opposite opinion then she's gonna believe it.

7/7 (last one sorry) and it seems like nobody on this piece of shit earth cares at all. Nobody seems to realize that this is happening to fuckign kids?? Who are supposed to be happy and do stupid stuff without fearing for your safety (not that her dating a girl or being bi is stupid but if they spot even the tiniest imperfect they make her seem like shes a worthless misbehaving shit even tho shes the complete opposite). Nobody cares that this is an actual human person and it fucking sucks

Hi Anon,

No apologies necessary, it’s clear you really care about your friend. And you’re absolutely correct, it’s not right what they’re doing to her no matter what her orientation is.

If computers are out, it might be time to go analogue. See if you can write her letters, and send them to her house, or if her parents wouldn’t like that either, send them to a friendly neighbor’s house for her to pick up when she can. If you’ve been to her house before, you might be able to look up the address by recalling the route and finding the house on google maps.

If you get the address, you can have anything sent over there. You might not know if letters or packages ever reached her until school starts back up, so if you end up sending anything, understand that you’re basically sending it into the ether.

Do her parents have a house phone? Even if they monitor her calls, you would at least be able to hear how she’s doing in general. Phone books like the Yellow Pages keep lists of everyone with a landline, unless they select to be private.

Depending on what level of abuse you know for sure has happened, you might be able to call Child Protective Services on her parents (or your country’s equivalent if you’re outside the U.S.). Use this tool with caution: if the situation isn’t bad enough for her to be immediately taken out of the house, then she would have to stay with parents who knew someone had called CPS. CPS investigates every report they get and often send a social worker to the house to verify if any reports are true. If they found evidence of abuse, they could potentially remove her from the home, although that is typically only in very extreme cases.

If none of those routes are possible, all you can be is wait and be ready for when she comes back. You can look up things that help abuse survivors so you’re ready but, ultimately, her health and safety is not your responsibility. You are not responsible if something happens to her. It won’t be your job to help her recover if she does come back in a bad mindset. Only give what you feel comfortable giving of yourself, and remember to take care of yourself, too. Your friend is very lucky to have someone like you looking out for her.

Good luck.

-Miss Fay

#abuse mention #mental abuse #mental health #family #parents #relationships #bisexual #siblings #cursing tw #homophobia #biphobia #child protective services

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newbornwhumperfly · 4 years

Text

some of them want to use you.

another chapter of my OCs.

be warned, explicit sex lies beyond this border & its dub-con (only in the most technical sense of the word).

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

If someone had told Brax a few weeks ago that they’d be ushering Morja to their quarters for a fuck, they would have smiled thinly and given them latrine duty for a week. They could not have known, when they recruited an enemy assassin into their ranks, that they’d fall for him.

Well, not...fall.

Respect him.

Care about him.

Really want to fuck him.

Enough so that Brax fumbled with their key as they led Morja into the austere but comfortable quarters, dimly lit by the washroom lamp. As Morja slipped in, Brax pressed Morja against the still-ajar door, hearing it slam as his back collided. Brax ducked into Morja’s space, hands lifting to cup his face.

His mouth was pliant and opened wide against Brax’s lips, faintly echoing Brax’s moan as their hands roamed the hard planes of Morja’s chest, stomach, explored the lower curve of his back, brushing against the swell of his ass. The man’s own hands had settled, featherlight, on Brax’s hips, now roving ever-so-slowly over Brax’s ribs.

Needing air, Brax reeled back from kissing, brushing their nose against Morja’s, watching him. That broad, handsome face was no longer blank, focused with all his usual intensity upon Brax, as though they were the center of the world.

That look went straight to their cock.

It didn’t help in the slightest when Morja murmured, low, sonorous, his voice that was always so quiet and restrained now snagged with a breathy desire:

“Would you...like to fuck my mouth?”

Oh.

Brax’s fingers curl, a flex of their fists as their belly clenched with the thrill of desire rolling through them. It’s been a while since anyone had gone down on them. It’s been a while in general.

“I’d like that.”

Morja nodded, eyes twin coals, dark and burning as they raked over Brax. They felt swell of desire that Morja’s offer was so focused on Brax’s pleasure warmed them, as did the desperation of the man’s lust. God, but they craved a good fuck.

They were so used carrying burdens, their own and others’, denying themself, again and again, of adequate care. Let alone indulgences. These days, their sexual pleasure came last. And now, this man, breathless and beautiful, was openly offering to suck them off? Brax thought they could afford to indulge.

They felt like a teenager again, horny and shaky, almost on the edge of nerves.

Not trusting themselves to speak, they let the backs of their legs hit the bed and sank down, spreading their knees. Morja had practically collapsed at Brax’s feet, between their thighs in a moment. His broad torso was a tight fit between Brax’s stout thighs, but Morja made his fall seem gracefully intentional.

God, Morja looked so stunning like this. So composed, so purposeful, even in his plain eagerness. Rough and knobby as his hands were with their myriad breaks and scars, they ghosted gently over Brax’s inner seam, making quick, careful work of the fastenings.

It was sweet and strange to see such diffidence in a passionate setting, Morja’s familiar behavior sharpening the heat of the moment until Brax needed Morja’s mouth on them now, right now.

As Brax’s leaking cock sprang free of its trappings, Morja brushed his knuckles along Brax’s thighs and paused, hesitance creasing his broad brow as he hovered.

What was he waiting for? Permission?

They ventured a firm, “Don’t wait up”, the steely, heated urgency of his voice sending a clear shiver through Morja.

They knew plenty of people enjoyed sexual submission - nothing wrong with that at all, obviously. Brax maintained strict control in all aspects of their life - the bedroom was not much different. They thrived as a guide, a firm and steady hand, and they certainly appreciate deference at the moment, as their commanding tone seemed to set Morja upon Brax’s cock with shocking eagerness.

Fuck.

Fucking Christ.

Morja was…very good.

Brax shivered from toe to scalp as Morja’s mouth engulfed them all at once, their length sliding down that warm throat so swiftly that Brax seized up, grabbing onto Morja’s head to steady themself. They almost apologized for the clumsy gesture but the man seemed to be invigorated by the touch.

Brax’s hips canted up into Morja’s face, the man now almost gagging himself on Brax’s cock as though he didn’t need oxygen like other mortals - like all he needed was Brax’s cock thrusting down his open, eager throat.

It was astonishing that Morja had this effect on him. They didn’t tend to talk a lot during sex (wasn’t one of those vocal types) but right now they felt speechless, staring down at Morja’s dark eyes, lit up with a clear eagerness that defied their usual suppression.

Brax could hardly believe that they made Morja lose control like this, made him so excited, feverish with desire? They’re harder than they’ve been in years from merely getting blown and they don’t trust themselves to speak without betraying their desperate state of arousal.

Brax wanted to hold back, to make this first time linger, but at this rate they were going to climax like a virgin.

They were at that age where they knew what they liked and they’d long since stopped justifying their sexual tastes. They knew they’d be classed as boring and somewhat un-fancy, but that was what they liked. They like their pleasures quick and simple and efficient. They hadn’t had many complaints for certain.

They fisted Morja’s hair at a trick of the quick wet tongue and the pace Morja was setting yanked those black curls at the contact. It did not seem to deter Morja.

If anything, it invigorated him further.

Huh.

Well, Brax mused listlessly, he wasn’t really one for rough stuff but, again, not his place to judge. People like what they like. They have a brief flash of Morja at the card game, spaced out and breathless after Jorah’s aggressive kiss, blood glinting berry-red on his lip, eyes as bright at they are now.

There was something to Morja’s fervor to please, his unrelenting drive, his hyper focus and dedication to whatever he did (including, at this moment, trying to suck Brax’s soul out through his cock) which provoked an unusual urge to tenderness within Brax.

They did not relinquish their grip on Morja’s hair, so soft, so damp with sweat, sweat rolling down Morja’s neck and jaw, beads glinting even in the pale dark of the unlit room. But they did place a loose hand on the back of Morja’s head, no pressure, no force, just a solid presence and rubbed their thumb appreciatively over the shaven expanse at the base of his skull.

God, but what Morja was doing with his mouth should be fucking illegal. It was perfect, perfect, perfect.

They were going to cum soon, especially with how nearly frantic Morja’s ministrations has become. And the low, barely perceptible noise he made as Brax’s cock hit the back of his throat? It would steal the very breath of a stronger person than Brax. That little gargle, that little whimper of need, a keen of clear desperate arousal made Brax hum louder than he intended, rough and rasped like a primitive growl. They’d usually be embarrassed and annoyed to have revealed that loss of control in the bedroom but Brax supposed it was fair.

If they could clearly cause Morja to become this drunk on arousal, heedless and hot, it was fitting that Morja should see them a little unhinged.

They gave Morja’s hair a gentle tug to signal him to slide off their cock but it did nothing.

“S-stop, I’m gonna-“

No sooner had they bitten out that first word then Morja sat back on his heels with shocking alacrity, freeing Brax’s cock from that glorious silky wet heat. It warmed Brax’s heart to see someone who was clearly so drunk on desire still be so receptive to consent.

Morja was a good man. So good. So good with his mouth.

But Brax has no fondness for spilling down someone’s throat and won’t spend on anyone’s face unless they explicitly ask.

Sunk onto his heels, panting soft yet ragged and barely quivering, Morja fixed his gaze to the carpet, obviously trying to gain control over himself. He watched Brax take their cock in hand and licked his lips, tilting forward urgently.

“Please, please, I can--“

He was so sweet but Brax liked what they liked and shushed the eager man by sliding their thumb over his lips as they untangled their fingers from his hair.

“Gonna...finish myself - ok?”

If Morja was offended or annoyed, it didn’t show. He seemed too dazed to properly hear it.

Brax canted to one side to quietly and closed their eyes as they stroked themself to completion. This method took longer than when fucking (God, they were getting old already) but the immediate sense memory of Morja’s throat had them spilling sooner than usual, coaxing a low shuddering groan from their lips while stars spun behind their lids.

God, what was Morja doing to them?

What had he done to them already?

Brax breathed evenly as possible, trying to regain some control over their heaving chest and trembling hands. Heaving onto their side, every inch of skin softened from the release, they swiveled back towards Morja, still kneeling and now more rigid than before, having risen off his heels.

Brax was no pillow princess and had a reputation as a more than equal giver in the bedroom.

And after a fuck like...that?

They wanted to make Morja fucking cry with pleasure.

They wanted see those thick arms quiver with anticipation as they gripped the headboard and that delectable sweat trickle down his whole broad body, bright focused dark eyes haze and roll with delight, his perfect mouth open and that glorious self-control slip as he moaned and writhed.

Their shifting knee brushed against Morja’s crotch, feeling it’s softness.

Did...did he cum just from sucking Brax off? A warmth, lower and more primal than before, rolled through Brax’s gut. They had to take another steadying breath. If they were a younger, less particular person, the flattery of that fact alone would have them hardening again.

Quirking an eyebrow, Brax was unable to suppress their slight twinge of disappointment that they were not able to make Morja cum by their own ministrations tonight.

The man was now watching their face, upturned eyes bright and keen, throat clicking.

Yet the hour was already late.

As much as they might aim for an uncharacteristic repeat performance, it was clear that Morja was tired. He’d been tired even before he had thrown himself at Brax, his body’s square angles struggling to hold themselves in alignment. Grey smudges, stark even against the golden hue of the man’s flesh, conveyed that he likely didn't sleep enough as it was.

Brax themself was pleasantly yet undeniably exhausted, the shock of their orgasm having leeched all the cricks and cramps from their coiled muscles.

So, as Morja fingered the hem of their undershirt, Brax stopped him with a hand on his elbow.

“I’m very tired,” Brax confessed softly, warmed at the little quiver which rolled through Morja’s arm at their words. Wearing out the tireless Brax with a simple sex act? Indeed. They were also surprised. “Another time? When I’ve got some energy in me that is.”

A lesser man would be peeved or even pouty, not that Brax much expected that sort of childishness from the gracious Morja and was not proven wrong when all the man did was nod slowly in agreement, eyes heavy and watchful and warm.

He really was so sweet.

Smiling, wide and soft, they ducked forward to rob a kiss from Morja’s pliant, wet, swollen (God) mouth, pressing as much lingering lust as they could into his lips. Morja shivered, nearly imperceptible, beneath their touch, stirring embers in Brax’s blood as they gently stroked his moist cheek with their thumb.

Brax placed so little weight on “first times” yet here they were getting sappy from a fucking blowjob, he really must be tired. Or it had just been a really good blowjob.

Fuck, they wish they were younger and less tired.

Gliding their fingers a final time through that damp, dark, lovely hair, Brax heaved to their feet as Morja scooted back and out of the way - stayed kneeling, probably knowing it wasn’t wise to stand too quickly.

“Well…I’m taking a shower, so, thank you, Morja.”

Why were they being weird about this? They were a goddamn, professional adult and this was just sex. Not with just anybody, of course, Morja was…important, but it was still just sex.

Nothing to fuss over.

Brax bid a hushed good night as they stepped over Morja’s knees on their way to the washroom.

“H-How…”

Brax paused to glance back at Morja, who had risen to his feet in his typical, at-attention, pose.

Guess the mood was officially gone.

He seemed trying to ask, to inquire, but failing to form the words. Maybe he was trying to thank Brax back? Maybe the deep-throating had left him a little voiceless.

Suppressing a shudder at the thought, Brax took pity on him and answered the most likely unspoken question.

“We can do this again, if that’s what you were wondering. If...that’s what you want?”

Brax found themself suddenly uncertain, but their twinge of nerves was quickly dispelled by Morja’s quick nod, naked gratitude washing over his face like light over rock. Brax’s sympathy sharpened. They shouldn’t be so easily fooled by that stony exterior - Morja was likely feeling a bit off-balance about this...whole thing, just as uncertain as Brax was.

No - far more so.

It was so hard for him to ask for even the most basic shit, seeming to expect less than nothing from anyone. It was awful and tragic and made Brax ache to spoil him.

They smiled at Morja, allowing themself to soften more than they otherwise might.

“Get some sleep. Next time, I promise I’ll pay better attention to you, ok?”

Even if they were reassuring, they could still leave a partner wanting more next time. They weren’t that far gone. With that encouraging tease lingering in the air, Brax smiled again and slipped into their private shower, oddly, unusually, content.

As they sagged against the steel wall as hot water pleasantly thundered over them, Brax smiled fully to themself at their promise to Morja, not a little thrilled by the way it (and the clear anticipation of desire) had made the man stop breathing.

Next time, Brax swore to themself, they would try and mirror Morja’s focus in order to repay him.

He certainly deserved it.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

i am gonna hide under a rock forever now, bye.

#oh gosh. it's Spicy Times.#my oc story #morja #brax #morja x brax #dub-con #technically? one of the parties doesn't think that the sex is anything other than enthusiastic consent #morja and company #my writing

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