#i did a lot of stupid shit at school

[distantsprings]

when i was in kindergarten my mom would pack me a school lunch (too picky from the autism to want to try school lunch) and the main food of it would typically be frosted mini wheats.

of course being like 5 years old i got tired of them very quicky so instead of eating them, i would violently smash them to make it look like they were crumbs instead of the whole mini wheats. 

the cafeteria people pretended to not care that i wasnt eating my mini wheats which always made it very confusing when my mom could somehow tell i did not eat any of the huge bag of mini wheat strings.

#junieposting #story i think about a lot #i did a lot of stupid shit at school #my friends could tell you most of them #this one is just the silliest to me though #i was too busy thinking about paper mario the thousand year door and diary of a wimpy kid 24/7 to realize that it would be the same amount #of mini wheat in the bag #crushed or not #also before anyone asks my mom tried to give me sandwiches #but the way the meat made the bread wet after being in my lunch box all day #was overstimulating in the worst way possible #food ment

[rg11]

whats your fav aspect(s) of jadekat?

anon im sorry but i had like 40+ notes prepaired for my thoughts on jadekat but i lost all of them proof-reading it and this is all i got

they are the ultimate yuri to me

#jadekat #rgtxt #there was also tags that were like #karkat did not get the outcome he wanted with jade #he punished himself (slapping himself isnt that bad but i digress) #for well finding pity in such a “stupid” human #and it was obvious to him she hated him #(before the apology) #he wanted to troll her but got red feelings for her and did not like it #like i feel like if youre nice to jade she would be nice to you but with how karkat was being an ass he just got into more shit lol #like another thing is that they bicker a lot #like in the old couple way but also like... #a highschool couple shipped together by their school but they do not like eachother that much #like that probably isnt a real trope but its a trope in my head #but its like 3am sorry anon my thoughts are jumbled and i dont remember much right now soz #but in the sense of bickering it was more like opposite trolling #mainly with the passwords #but karkat was just trolling himself with that hugeass paragraph with just... i dont want to think about it hes just fucking weird #i am referring to page 3972 #i think the whole “you turned it into this overdramatic thing” is a good way to dumb down their relationship #most of her actions are just poking fun but then he will make a whole entire soap opera #she would do a puppet show he would do shakespear #and thats funny as shit

[goldkirk]

My five happy things for the day

• paper that has a good feeling texture

• things not feeling like an emergency EVERY second of the day, only part of the time

• the fact that these cheapo stamp ink pads from Walmart a few years ago somehow still have a bit of functioning ink not dried out?

• I’m able to track and retain conversations for longer periods of time again, I’m finally finally finally feeling some progress

• putting on a warm hoodie or coat when feeling chilled

#fivethingsaday #I still can’t believe people LIKE me!! ?! ?! ?! ?! #I’ve accidentally wound up dumbfounded with a delightful number of friends #like. wait. I thought you guys were playing a very long trap or were only liking me because of obligation or worth vs hassle ratio. #I thought I was just enjoying it before it vanished! but yowza!!! #apparently I DID get the chance for it to be real #and I am in the middle of living an adult life I didn’t think I’d see!!! #so anyway holy shit I apparently am not secretly a poison to people #these cool people I’ve been so admiring of and wished I could really have a life with someone like them as a friend #BITCH I DO IT IS ME #what the FUCK. #anyway I’ve got to go keep trying to wrangle my very uncooperative knee #and marvel at the slowly-dawning reality of being liked actually not just kept around #god grade school age social hierarchy lessons sure get roots down in deep #I’m so pleased as punch and totally in skeptical disbelief. I’m also delighted and horrifically embarrassed and feeling stupid and feeling #unbearably grateful and feeling quite particularly like I’m in the Truman show and also won the lottery #I’m going to do a lot of STICKING WITH IMPORTANT ROUTINES FOR MY WELL-BEING about it #add to journal

[shopcat]

this might sound a bit dumb and out of no where but hmmm. how do i say this... there are a lot of posts and a general consensus about quote unquote media literacy on tumblr and how we feel about it, as well as the things that go hand in hand with all that (discussion of mischaracterisation, symbolism, analysis, etc) and i think people (generally) need to be more open about their thoughts or findings and less i don't know... harsh isn't the word but like, just less assumptive that people are inherently out to be willfully ignorant when it comes to dissecting media thematically or discussing characterisation & the narrative, esp things where the outside factor of the consumer/creator changes things drastically if you do or do not know or experience something (and therefore would have no reason to be like, somehow maliciously interpreting something). i guess?

like i get it and i absolutely understand and also hate when people seem to go out of their way to say all the wrong things and stubbornly cling onto things that are WRONG, and confronting someone's opinion and it being SO wrong that you can comfortably think of a rebuttal is ultimately very satisfying and scratches a certain itch and can lead to a lot of thoughtful discussion despite being essentially a big "get a look at THIS guy". but i do think there is a vast difference between like, a) someone masquerading behind being knowing buzzwords and being able to say the right words in the right order, b) someone who isn't familiar with certain concepts and DOESN'T know the right words to say but is happily open to learning, and c) someone using the guise of talking about "media literacy" to be ignorant, bigoted or willfully misinterpreting something in a biased way who refuses to concede if confronted or goes out of their way to pick arguments. whilst the first two aren't malicious, both could turn out to be, just like the last category tends to be rejects of the first two who dug their heels in about it.

whilst there is a DIFFERENCE if someone was being say bigoted and prejudiced with hateful intent, not being "media literate" is not actually a moral failing as much as it is made out to be in moments of sweeping generalisation, and i think punishing people for not knowing how to hold thoughtful discussion is obviously cruel and dumb and unnecessarily othering. you don't want people to learn things out of a sense of shame or guilt. i know it's not the INTENT, and i don't like, interpret even 99% of discussion about this whole thing that way, but that doesn't change that discussing people very broadly who just Don't Know something is always going to leave the 1% of a LOT of harshness thrown against someone who doesn't deserve that. even if they're the stupidest twitterina known to man or something.

media literacy itself is not inherent and it is HARD, as much as people try to pretend it isn't. personally i am someone who has always and probably always WILL struggle to understand complex themes and often do need someone else to guide me towards thinking a certain way, thinking in these ways don't come naturally to me as much as i try my best to and i often think the "wrong" thing as my natural conclusion. and every Damn time that happens i see someone going "if you didn't realise this you're a fucking idiot" like woah man 😭 calm down. i dunno i feel like people just forget that this stuff is something you have to train like a muscle, esp things like vocabulary or a more complex academic way of speaking, and to some of us that is always going to be inherently inaccessible or it's going to take twice as long for us to grasp, for whatever reason. i just wish people were more fair is all.

#🐾 #esp and i think i'm qualified to say this when it's someone who comes from a very isolated niche of online fandom or whatever. any online #community. who is used to being in that space with likeminded people and then loses their absolute shit when they're confronted with how #the average person thinks. like ohhhh my god calm down it is not that dramatic ever #as much as i like going to war about characterisation or something like that you don't need to be calling people evil and braindead and #stupid bc they didn't Politically Analyse a children's cartoon in great depth #😭😭😭 #anyway ... #i think this is in a roundabout way connected to that one post going around i reblogged #abt media literacy being taught in highschool and people just not paying attention #and i still think that's like unfair as a position to hold bc Again i DIDNT go to high school as in i did Not Attend it #the breadth of my knowledge ends after year 7 #and that's just me. like yeah some people ARE idiots and ignorant and pretend Again like their brains welded shut #but people generally are always open to learning and a lot of people very much Like thoughtful discussion about the arts #and thematic analysis of their favourite shows so they can describe why they like them properly beyond ''i just like it'' #and just really really broadly cutting them all off declaring them hopeless and indirectly declaring yourself smarter than them forever #is ultimately unhelpful. and fucking rude. if they've done or said nothing wrong at least #and even if they did think something wrong like damn that's happened to everyone please.. it happens all the time #there is just this inherent condescending way some people talk that gets on my damn nerves

[megansplants]

.

#I feel a little like I’m losing my passion for plants #not that I don’t still LOVE my plants #but like I don’t need to spend hours on the weekends messing with them anymore #I have so many other things I’m doing that make me happy #I don’t have a hole in my life to fill with plants #there isn’t as much NEED there anymore #and I kind of….. don’t mind #Bridger and I are happy and I love my job #we love to hang out together and basically spend all day on the weekends and all evening every day talking #and playing games and snuggling and having fun and listening to records #I feel so much more fulfilled than I did when I was lonely in school #like I’m so much more ‘well then fuck you too!’ when people say stupid shit when I give advice on social media #I used to feel the need to explain everything and I spent a lot of time moderating the plant group #and i really wanted my book to become a huge thing #but now it’s kind of like….. I tinker around with stuff when I feel like it #I will get on the plant group once every few weeks instead of every few hours #I’m just living life man

[denizenhardwick]

the portrayal of social anxiety in dear evan hansen always bothered because like. okay. so the initial misunderstanding is actually 100% believable, just straight-up what 15- or 16-year-old me would have done in a situation where i keep getting shut down when i try to speak up. just go quiet and go along with whatever's going on. and from that point on, i would actively avoid everyone involved in the situation as much as i possibly can. just escape, get away, not deal with it again. and now i have a permanent debuff of anxiety and guilt forever. if i was forced to talk to the murphys again, i would quickly clarify what was actually going on, because at that point there's no easy escape, and trying to create a lie is infinitely more stressful than fessing up, apologizing, and freeing myself of the situation.

but evan isn't me, so let's say for him, crafting an elaborate lie is somehow less stressful than telling the truth. okay, i can buy that. what fucking baffles me, though, is how much he seemingly gets into it without feeling any anxiety at all about this horrible stressful situation he's got himself in? to the point that he goes off his meds because he says he doesn't need them anymore? you would think that hinging your entire social life on an elaborate lie that could be exposed at any moment would be the most stressful thing imaginable for someone with "getting a little bit embarrassed in front of other people makes me actually literally want to die" disorder. but no, he's just fine now lol

#i read the script for deh and it was almost impossible for me to get through because #even just thinking about the situation evan was in triggered so much anxiety in me #despite theoretically having social anxiety rep the plot is just uniquely evil to people who have it lol #like actual worst-case scenario shit all the way through #i was in high school when i read it and at that time my anxiety was so bad that not only could i barely talk to anyone just in general #i would also pretty regularly think about killing myself when i didn't complete my assignments #because literally not existing anymore seemed preferable to the embarassment of facing my teacher the next day #and admitting i didn't finish my homework. and then i realized that i had lots of stuff i actually wanted to do #and it would be fucking stupid to kill myself over homework but that's the level of anxiety we're talking about here #so i did not like the show but then all the criticism was like 'evan is an irredeemably awful person for all of this' #and i would feel terrible because i understood how he got into the situation and could see myself getting into it too #it was just unpleasant all around both the show and the reception hurt me

[scaredofmyocs]

I love it when i accidentally stay up on the night im supposed to be catching up on sleep it totallly doesnt make me feel horrible all week long

#talk post #i love this blog i want to live here #I cant!!! i just cant!!! go to bed at a normal fucking time istg #but noooooo the wild grinders wiki no some stupid bullshit no one has ever cared about before #WHEN I DONT GET ENOUGH SLEEP MY MENTAL HEALTH GETS WAY WORSE!!!!! IF I DONT FIX IT WE ARE GOING TO GET TOO SILLY #(yelling at a mirror) #seriously bothers me tho that Im always worried about how intense my negative feelings have been lately #and im like “oh ill just get more sleep” and then immediately fuck it up the next night making me tired all week #making me feel SO bad in the mornings and at night and increasing my paranoia and other such thoughts #and in trying to tune it all out just forget about it again leading to me fucking it up again #this is a bit dramatic its only happened 2 weeks in a row #but that feels like a lot because thats like 10 nights where i felt like i blinked and i had to wake up and go to school #and not only deal with my shitty social skills but the results of said thing #and also try to fight the thoughts that are like “this shits pointless im not doing this” LIKE PLEASE pretend to be normal for one year #and also that one teacher i have who demands every students attention while he teaches like i already finished the work sheet shut it #like i do well in that class just let me do what i want im not being distracting like girl i have at least an 87 dw about me #PLUS most of the time im not even on my phone he just really wants me to look at the board but girl as i said I ALREADY DID WHATS ON THERE #i feel like i never get to relax but i do all the time so i dont know what i mean #i keep saying “its ok as long as i can bury all my thoughts and just keep going while filling what free time i have with things i enjoy” #but things only work for so long #i hate the passage of time #anyawy erm wrong my guitar is in my mind (stupid ass guitar riff) #walks over to my bed and trips on the way falling asleep on the floor #ramble #hit post

[septimus-heap]

I think u ppl need to calm down on calling things "90s kids" stuff. Just saw that post abt how ur meant to put water in those dry markers from the shitty art kits and someone said smth abt "90s kids screaming in outrage" as if literally every child in the last 22 years who was under the age of 13 and ever displayed the urge to colour hasnt had one of those

#sep talks #like idk #this one specifically was just someone being stupid but even stuff like the big clunky tvs and certain classroom toys #'only 90s kids will remember!!' I think perhaps u were just well off #my parents had been getting those old clunky tvs off freecycle up until I was like 8 #and then we finally got a flatscreen #and this one is. I don't think smth a lot of ppl my age share but I distinctly remember when in primary school #theyd wheel out the tv and we'd watch bbc cats eyes (educational program) on what I am 99% sure was vhs #my house is full of cds that my parents got years ago and I used to ask for them for christmas and shit so I could have more music on my #mp3 player. Like u all say 'only 90s kids will remember' abt stuff that literally everyone between the ages 13-30 has had #obviously some of this stuff doesn't rlly count but I see so many posts and I'm like. Is this an american thing that britain got late #or did this person just have money growing up #OR does this person spend so much time on tiktok that they think ur average tiktok teen is a good representation of what ppl #under the age of 20 r doing these days. (they r not)

[fleshdyke]

ahsgsjaugejwjg

#sh/sui warning for tags #been having a shit day and just not feeling great overall and usually drinking water and eating helps but it hasnt today :/ #which means its an Actual Problem this time. like i knew it was an actual problem when i fucking cut AGAIN but idk #idk man. im just so so so scared of my friends hating me #and i know i have to see my partner again bc she is the one and only person that never ever makes me feel safe and unjudged and everything #but idk. as of right now im just not havin a great time. #like its actually so stupid the things i get upset about. there was some motivational speaker at my school today and when we got called down #to go watch the presentation i had to take like five seconds to grab my bag and phone from my desk #and my two friends got up and left together without waiting for me #and i know it wasn’t their intention and they weren’t trying to be mean or anything but man. doesnt make it hurt less yk. #and i saw some post from a guy in my school of him and his friends in the cafeteria and idk why but it made me so sad. it made me think abt #one time my friends said they wanted to walk around at lunch so i was like ok i’ll eat alone that’s fine bc i’m too disabled to walk around #the school. and then someone sent me a pic of them all eating together in the cafeteria. and i know they probably just stopped there for a #second and weren’t purposely ignoring me or anything but man that did not help yk #i want to leave them alone bc they never seem to want to talk to me but im trying to tell myself its just my mind but its so hard to #and i do love my friends and im making them seem a lot worse here than they are but its just. god im so scared. #idk. i dont actually want to die but i wish i could kms like. temporarily. #i know this is bad and manipulative but i just cant shake the want to know what would happen if i did yk. and this is a terrible train of #thought but like i want my friends to realize how scared this makes me and if i have to kms to do that. idk. #ive brought it up to them before and they pretty much told me to eat with someone else and i said i didnt have any other friends and they #kind of just said not my problem. so i dont want to bring it up again bc im mature enough to deal with my own issues and shit #it’s just hard man. i dont know how im supposed to communicate w them bc everything feels like im traumadumping on them and i dont want to #bother them. im trying to convince myself its not an issue and it doesnt actually bother me but i know it does bc i just fucking relapsed #and i had a city council thing in class today and i was the only person that was denied any funding at all and i was trying not to take it #personally and i was doing pretty good but i told my mom about it and she started defending the ppl that refused me anything and then it was #suddenly personal to me for some reason. its stupid and i know that but god that doesnt make it any better #rambles #vent

[rainphee]

general life update

#rainbow speaks #i was at school on my day off to work on this stupid thing #for the record i didn't want a monster energy #but the only things the vending machine had were that #sparkling water (gross i hate it) #coke (not in the mood) #and DASANI #the worst kind of bottled water. bottled water equivalent of a red delicious apple #so i had the monster. #i took my meds with the monster also which is pretty high up there as far as bad life choices go #i did more after this picture was taken but it looks like shit so only my friends get to see #and now i am exhausted and grumpy and in a lot of pain #and i have to go back TOMORROW to work on this thing MORE #anyway if you read in the tags this far hi how are you #i hope you had a nice day #goot bye

[milo-is-rambling]

Day whatever it is recap!

#📸 #I think it’s day five maybe #also I’m at my brothers school for the last time ever :/ #probs the last time I’ll ever step into a college dorm again tbh #and I got one last shower in the dorm bathroom which is always good bc if I’m seeing my brother chances are I’ve at very least spent three #hours in a car to get to him #so a shower is nice especially bc I was like panic attack sweaty. tmi? maybe. #I didn’t really do a lot today #at least not postable stuff #a lot of hanging out with family and Millie and being tired and kind of miserable but also daydreaming about any other shit in my life #idk. it all feels weird rn. all of it. and my brain is nagging me saying you’re being/doing x y z for attention even when I’m not telling #anyone shit im doing or thinking or anything and my brain is still like nah. you’re jealous of your brother graduating and not being home #at the end of dads life and at the same time you feel stressed and guilty and feel bad about him not getting closure #but at the same time you just wish you didn’t see his fucking body on the ventilator and all the IVs and the bloat and the popped blood #vessels and the nurses and doctors and knowing they did cpr so much if he even survived he would be miserable and have broken ribs #fuck. I want to be home and alone and crying about this all by myself alone. I hate this I hate this I hate this I want to go smoke a cig #but this is a no smoking campus ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh I am miserable and this is supposed to be this big fun #thing for my brother and I feel selfish and stupid for having feelings and letting myself get upset about my dad but my fucking mother #made some sign to put in an empty chair for my dad and she brought his jacket he wore all the time and I started crying when I saw and then #immediately after we had to go see his parents and my grandfather is falling apart and reminds me of my dad in the hospital and I’m just so #miserable and between horrible thoughts and self harm and everything I’m keeping to myself I am just thinking about how this is so bitter #sweet for my brother like he’s graduating with his friends and then moving away from them all to a place where it’s just all about dad being #dead and he doesn’t like Florida really and he’s gotta start his grown up life (technically he has two more classes online and he’s getting #a blank diploma tomorrow but yeah. things are rough and my body hurts and stress is so bad for me and my chronic pain and I feel like I went #from the most relaxed and comfortable and happy I’ve been in a year to feeling like hell on earth and I feel like I’m bringing down every #one else’s mood but like hello why are we pretending any of this normal thid can’t be real this can’t be real this can’t be real I don’t #want this to be reak I want it to be fake it has to be fake please please please wake up tomorrow and have it be a year ago please #I miss my father and I hate myself and violent thoughts are taking over my mind and I hate it all but things were so good literally up until #I saw my mom and grandparents #my brother was so nice when it was just us too (and later I just mean before mom got here specifically he was still nice to me)

[running-in-the-dark]

it's a little frustrating when friends or family members tell me that I'm smart/know a lot of things/I can do this (whatever 'this' is, like writing my bachelor thesis for example)

I know they mean well but my brain does not work. it just doesn't. I can't remember anything, ever. I can barely understand academic writing anymore, sometimes even other things that really aren't complicated at all, I don't know if it's because I can't focus enough or what, but I just really *can't* do it

#this post is brought to you by: I just tried to remember something that I care about and there's just Nothing #idk it sucks when you're trying to explain a problem that you have and everyone just goes 'no you're not stupid! you can do it!' when I was #just trying to explain #idk I'm not making sense #it happens a lot and I'm just tired of it #let me be annoyed by this stupid useless brain that I have to live with 24/7 please 😭 #I remember the two years I did well in school (again) and like... who was that. how am I that person. how am I like this now #it's really fucking frustrating #idk I should shut up and sleep or some shit #I want to get drunk but nooo stupid meds + alcohol = bad ugggghhhh #personal

[motheyes]

alright so that was fine

#i think it’ll be just fine. besides the building being weird and creepy and the stupid alarms i have to set #very scary i hate alarms. hate HATE alarms #and there’s these silent alarms under the teller desks and if u touch them like 500 cops show up #LIKE GIRL WWHAT THATS MY FUCKING WORST NIGHTMARE #i’m gunna have nightmares about accidentally touching them i know it #anyways it’s not so bad lol #i was there real late tonight cuz i was figuring everything out #i hate doing new stuff and learning new floors and shit it’s stressful #anyways. i did have a very good like. talk with my dad a few days ago about my future #one of my new year goals is too at least kinda figure out a career path #like start school again or something cuz i need job security that isn’t ass #and i have been doing a lot of research on social work and it’s like #perfect for me. i’m rlly excited about it #it’s literally directly helping your community and i get paid like HELLO #and i can specialize in lgbtq like get youth off the streets and stuff #literally my dream. isnane #MAN MY CAT PEEING ON THE FLOOR JESUS CHRIST

[iamjessemccartney]

🙃

#im gonna lose my mind and unfortunately not in a fun way #teacher im interning with texted me earlier telling me not to go in to school today bc she has covid #because ive been with her all week and she hasnt been wearing a mask at all i've been hella exposed #i had to drive to target to get tests because i took the One we'd had left in the pantry. and THEN found out it was expired #soon as i get in my car. turn it on. light that tells me i need air in my tires is on and i mean Immediately #i LITERALLY put air in my tires just under a month ago. i remember this because it was the first day of metro con. #and i did it on the way to the con. dressed as a fucking anime girl. #i decide i dont give enough of a shit about my tires because of that and bc i need to go fucking covid test myself so i drive to target #i park. as i pull into a space i FEEL my car do some fucking stupid shit. i go into the store. i come out. #i get to the first stop sign on my way out of the parking lot and i can tell my car is Sinking down on the front left tire #quarter of the way home my tire is completely flat #i get less than 2 minutes from the house. my car sounds like it's going to explode because im practically driving on my fuckin rims #and i have to call my mom to tail me the rest of the way in case my fucking car blows up or some shit #there was a HUGE fucking tear in my tire. #i take one of my new covid tests. comes back negative. go to sams club (masked) with my parents to get a new tire #i fucking get home and i get reminded of the fact that covid may not be detectable within the first few days :) #which means the plans i'd made for saturday had to be cancelled :) and while they have since been resolved i am Still #Upset #because today has just been BULLSHIT #by FAR i have had worse. but im having this day Right Now. and right now. i am upset.

[eggsnatcheskneecaps]

Hmmm I should really work on my self image issues me thinks

TW for mentions of physical and general (ig?) abuse for anyone brave enough to venture in the tag wormhole rant that I'm about to create down there

#ANYWAY #for as much as i beat myself up for being a failure compared to my family (a group of intellectuals ig. medics; engineers; teachers) #i really overlook the fact that i had to deal with a LOT of shit growing up and that i did the best out of my unfortunate situation? #......and I'm not as stupid as my mind makes me out to be. i think. #YEAH i could do better. i could have not fallen behind on sciences and make myself into an idiot #but also. that happened because of terrible mental health and really messed up abuse going on at home. WHAT else am i expecting from my ~13 #y/o self? i really need to give myself a break. #this is all my brain repeating what's been beaten into me by my parents for not being a perfect student #i don't need to be perfect #i just need to be and help myself #I'm not so bad #on the other hand I'm pretty goddamn sure i have an undiagnosed neorudivergent something something #so that's kinda out there for why the school system doesn't work as it should for me #it's a shame that my country's medical system is such trash that it's practically impossible to get diagnosed as an older AFAB child. sigh #or as AFAB overall #egg.txt #vent #rant

[iintervallum]

I hate the dismisal of online lgbt spaces as not as important as in real life or what goes on within the spaces as not that bad, because for me at least, I don't have anyone I know in my area that I can talk to about being lgbt, and I'm relatively scared of selectiviely outing myself to find more people, because i really wouldnt want it to get back to my parents somehow.

My point is, online spaces are very important as a point of connection for the many of us that have no one irl, and I hate how any serious method of discussion gets turned into discourse. like people saying there is a severe amount of lesbophobia, biophobia, transmisogyny and racism in the community are not picking fights. we're trying to make this space better because for some of us its all we have! so please, do better.

#aster.txt #kind of a vent more than anything because its frustrating and i'm getting both nostalgia for the past and derision for it #there were two people i did know in my HS that are lgbt but they both moved to canada for uni #one of them is a total sweetheart and I miss talking to her so much #like they were such a wonderful person to complain about our schools stupid rules #and how shitty gender roles are and how conservative indian parents suck #and last i saw shes transfem since they made a secret priv account with she/they pronouns and them wearing a dress as the first post #i hope she found people that they could connect to where ever she is now #the other is not so positive a story lol #she is the main reason why my self esteem issues went from not that good to very bad #like her mind games and the fact that she called me clingy as an attempt to get another friend to stop being around them was shitty #i isolated myself from other people for a long time becasue i thought i would just ruin things if i got too close and showed my personality #despite her doing that i didnt actually hate her until i found out what she did to a friend of mine #my friend was having family issues because her father had tyroid cancer and her “friends” including that person forced her to tell them #and that person had the gall to say that what she was going through wasn't that bad and she should stop making stuff about herself #after they forced her to open up #god i hated high school uni isnt any better but i'm glad its not high school #so many petty people because we're all teenagers going through our own shit and we're still figuring things out #i'm half thinking of just unfollowing a lot of them on instagram becasue they sucked but no i wont do that..yet