#i did this in a rush past midnight while trying to avoid an anxiety attack so pls excuse the mistakes jgfjhfjhf | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

missskzbiased · 3 years

Text

I Hate That I’m Afraid to Love You (8)

Genre: Romance, Friendship, Angst, Hurt /Confort , Suggestive, Fluff, College Au, Enemies to Friends to Lovers Au, REALLY Slow burn, Love Square (?)

Pairing: Hyunjin X Fem!Reader X Han X OC

WC: ~ 5K

[Previous] [Chap] [Next]

Masterlist

Warnings (general*): Language, Mentions of (Physical abuse, Death/ Loss of Loved One, Child Abandonment/Neglect, Divorce, Toxic Parents, Cancer, Mental disorder, Anxiety Attack, Alcohol, Food), Suggestiveness (?)

Notes: I’m posting earlier because I won’t be able to post it at midnight. Next week the update will be just like usual.

I want to say that we’re getting closer to the chap 11, the last one I have written, and if when I post it I don’t have the other ones written yet, the update won’t have a schedule anymore since I don’t want to rush writing [Also I’m blocked to this fic. But I think I might be getting new ideas to the chap 12, so let’s stay hopeful]

Updates: I’ll update it once a week [Tuesdays] because I still have to write the chapters to come and review the ones I already wrote

/////

He was absolutely everywhere this week.

Even though you studied on the same Campus for a few years now, you never ran into Hyunjin so many times as you did this past week. You knew it wasn’t like he was stalking you, so you assumed maybe you just didn’t pay attention to his presence, or maybe he avoided you before? It could be even related to the hot dog stand… Maybe it had changed his opinion about the other stands on the Campus?

Whichever was the reason for you to bump into him all the week, the fact that neither of these days you guys fought for real was impressive by itself. You even were getting along with each other. When would you imagine that you would hang out with Hyunjin peacefully one day? Never. You crossed your legs, waiting for him to knock on your door. Paris walked around the place, grabbing things she thought were important to go to Han’s match.

As you watched her going around, you recalled your strangely friendly week.

Monday

There was something about Mondays that just didn’t click.

You grunted, rolling your eyes as you spotted the queue, the only thing in your way to get the holy drink that allowed you to function on Monday mornings: Coffee. You checked your phone, sighing as you realized that there was no way in hell you would get your coffee and be on time for your classes. You clicked your tongue, annoyed, spinning on your heels to make your way to the closest vending machine.

The universe must be a man or it wouldn’t be a dick to you every morning.

The greatest way to begin your day could only be buying a cheap and utterly disgusting coffee just so you could arrive on time for your classes. Sometimes you wished your Professors would give you some more credit. You were sacrificing your own happiness for them, just so they could fill your desk ─to not say another word─ with assignments to do.

You strode, checking the time phone’s clock a few times, bumping in some people in the way while letting a bunch of ‘Sorry’ and ‘My bad’ slip through your lips. You skipped some steps, going up the stairs as quickly as you could and finally getting to your destination: The vending machines. You waited behind two girls who seemed to think about what they were going to get, deciding to check your messages for the time being.

“Did you hear about it?” the blond one whispered, not paying attention to you but looking to her sides, checking to see if anyone was hearing. Well, hello to you too. The brunette leaned her way, cupping her ear so she could listen to the gossip on first hand “They’re dating” She whispered not as discretely as she thought, making the brunette gasp.

Blondie nodded as if it was something really impressing and matter-of-factly, and apparently, it really was since Brunette seemed shocked, covering her mouth with her hand. She decided to add a “No way” that made Blondie hum, nodding once again as they exchanged a knowing look. You waited for them to finally choose something from the machine but, of course, they couldn’t do this, gushing about whatever they were saying in a way that you couldn’t really make sense of their words.

“Excuse me? Are you going to buy something?” You decided to ask, arching your brow and crossing your arms, kinda done with them. Why the hell take a line to gossip when they could just stand anywhere else as they talked about it? Blondie turned to you, an obnoxious expression on her face, ready to be an asshole.

As soon as she met your eyes, though, she paled; features blanking and eyes averting from yours immediately. Just as suspiciously, Brunette shrieked, looking at you with wide eyes and pursing her lips before averting her eyes from yours to meet her friend’s.

Okay, something was definitely weird here.

And you were smart enough to assume they were talking about you.

“So?” You pressed but they didn’t say anything, nudging each other with their elbows and snapping you some embarrassed looks before connecting their eyes. Blondie cleared her throat, opening her mouth to say something that never came. She gasped, looking past you, chirping at her friend, and you frowned, turning back to see what was the commotion about.

“Morning, girls” Hyunjin smirked, stopping right behind you and greeting them with a nod “Y/N” He added later, a hint of amusement under his tone. You nodded back at him, scanning his face. He gave the girls a dimpled smile, eyes scrunching and glinting friendly at them, not a note of dark circles or grumpiness in any corner… Okay, how the hell he did that on a Monday morning?

The girls turned around to the machine, finally choosing something and hurrying to pick it up, rushing to get away from you but throwing looks over their shoulders. You narrowed your eyes, furrowing your brows in deep thought as you approached the machine, selecting the only coffee you could take from there and inserting your money in the hole.

“Did you hear something weird today?” You asked casually, waiting for the machine to drop your coffee so you could pick it up. Hyunjin shrugged, thoughtfully sticking his lower lip out, seeming to think about your question. He shook his head, denying, and you sighed, turning back to pick up your coffee.

That wasn’t there.

You whined, spotting your drink stuck on the machine, throwing your head back and groaning, totally done with the day. Hyunjin chuckled, peeking over your shoulder to understand what was happening before breaking out in a fit of giggles, trying to muffle them with his hand, looking away. You grimaced at him, kicking the machine lightly to see if it could help somehow, and obviously hurting your foot in the process, which made him laugh more, twittering.

“Hey!” You grumbled, looking at him warily. You checked your phone again. Great, just five minutes to be officially late for your classes! You rested your forehead on the glass, bumping it softly twice before sighing, ready to forfeit. He seemed to take pity on you, tapping your shoulder so you would look at him.

“Here, let me help you” He offered, pushing you lightly so you would get out of his way, and giving two hard hits at the side of the machine, followed by three slaps and one kick. You looked at him impressed, waiting for the coffee to fall. He blocked your view with his back, and waited a bit, looking inside the machine before repeating his previous actions “Well, it helps on movies” He pointed out, still not looking at you, and you cackled up.

As soon as you heard the engine’s working, coiling inside the machine, and the soft thud made way to your ears, you gasped, laughing dying in your throat. He looked smugly at you, picking up the bottle and handing it to you, his smirk almost too cocky to handle. You rolled your eyes, taking it from his hands, preparing to thank him when you noticed it.

The same bottle stuck there, looking at you.

You looked at the bottle in your hands before giving the other bottle another look, trailing your eyes to Hyunjin slowly. He smiled mischievously now, and you soon realized what he had just done. You hurried to open your bag, searching for your wallet just to realize you forgot it at the dorm, letting another groan leave your lips, tired of this day already. You opened your mouth to protest but he raised his hand, waving it dismissively.

“That’s my surrender gift” He smiled at you, and you sighed before checking your phone once again.

“I’ll pay you back” You promised, turning around to rush to your classroom.

“Oh, can I know how you’ll do it?” He asked suggestively, raising his voice so you could hear him. You rolled your eyes, although he didn’t see it, before shooting him your middle finger.

“Fuck off” You shouted back, and you shook your head in amusement as you heard him chortle at your snap.

Tuesday

You pinched the bridge of your nose, letting a sigh fall from your lips.

It would be impossible not to be aware of all the looks people shot your way and the whispering following every step you took on the halls. You hoisted your bag over your shoulder, lowering your head and fixing your gaze on the floor as you strode quickly, sensing Paris following right behind you.

“What the hell is happening?” She mused, heading to your usual sit, as soon as you got to the classroom, throwing her bag on the desk as she sat down. You followed her, looking at her in clear defeat before resting your bag beside hers, sighing as you took your seat.

“I don’t have any idea” You admitted, looking around the room, noticing a few heads snapping away, pretending not to watch you both like a hawk “I heard some girls talking about someone dating yesterday… I guess they’re talking about me and Hyunjin?” You guessed, shrugging “They sure acted strange when he showed up” You added, pensive.

“You? Dating Hyunjin?” Paris asked surprised, brows shooting up and an amused smile spreading through her face “Why?” She chuckled, shaking her head in disbelief, eyes wandering to the door to meet an amused Hyunjin coming in. He walked as if he owned the place, looking to each classmate in the front and giving them a silent greeting before he got next to both of you.

“Have you heard the news?” He asked, chuckling, before pulling the chair to sit down, the scrapping sound making you cringe “We’re dating” He stated, eyes holding such amusement that they almost disappeared as he grinned.

“Oh? So that’s really it?” You hummed, nodding in understanding “Why does everybody think we’re dating?” You asked curiously and he shot you a surprised look, head tilting back slightly and brows arching up as he blinked once, totally dumbfounded.

“What?” His tone confused you, voice faltering as it mixed with giggles, eyes looking at you with awe.

“What?” You asked sternly, frowning at him, trying to find some hint on his amused features that explained why he found it so funny. You leaned forward on your desk to take a better look at him, and Paris leaned back, interested in what was unraveling in front of her, eyes darting to both of you expectantly.

“Well- No, I mean…” He leaned forward, mimicking you, his amused feature giving way to confused one “I heard about me and Paris” He stated, and this time you were the one who got dumbfounded “Are we disappointed here?” He teased, smirking at you suggestively, which you promptly ignored.

“Oh” You blurted, surprised, blinking a few times and nodding in understanding. You cleared your throat, fixing yourself on your seat, settling against the backrest “Paris, hm?” You nodded again, hand rising slowly to your chin, cupping it as your index finger rested on your lips “So why the hell are people talking behind my back?” You mused out loud, frowning, eyes focused on the empty whiteboard.

“You should be used to it by now” He mocked, and you glanced at him in contempt, rolling your eyes before quirking your lips down, shaking your head in disbelief. Paris chuckled, looking at both of you amused, crossing her arms while she watched your interaction as if it was her favorite movie, making you throw her a narrowed look.

“Ha-Ha, you’re so funny” You sneered, eyes wandering back to him. He chortled, his smirk growing to a grin.

“Was that why you fell for me?” You let your head fall back, groaning at his sickening tone. This time Paris burst out laughing, hiding her face behind her hands as she tried to control herself, pinching her nose right after and giving up, letting a satisfied sigh through her lips as she shook her head in amusement.

“Not at this level of friendship yet” You warned him jokingly, watching as Mr.Lee finally arrived, smiling at everyone and waving, greeting you all. He snorted, nodding in agreement as he fixed his attention to the Professor.

It was just like any other day.

Professor Lee resumed his previous classes, going on and on about human emotions and how each one of us can have an impact on one another. As usual, you noted everything down, occasionally looking at him, pencil tapping your lips as you thought about what he just said, and scribing down your own observations on the notebook. Paris and Hyunjin once in a while voiced their thoughts to Mr.Lee, and usually, you would follow them but this time something different happened.

You agreed with Hyunjin.

You raised your brows when you opened your mouth and he interrupted you, not noticing that you wanted to add something to the discussion, and said exactly the same thing you were going to say. You chuckled, which didn’t go unnoticed by either your friends or Mr.Lee, who promptly smiled at you, gesturing your way.

“Do you have something to say, Ms.Y/N?” He asked calmly, interested in your reaction “I must say I was kinda disappointed you didn’t try to discuss anything today” He smiled fondly, crossing his arms and leaning back on the board, waiting for a heated debate as usual.

“Actually, Professor…” You laughed, a soft bark that made him look at you in wonder “I’m with Hyunjin on this one” You admitted. Professor Lee looked at you in genuine surprise, mouth agape for a moment before he chortled, nodding in acknowledgment, eyes glinting in amusement. You got a glimpse of Hyunjin’s head snapping your way, utterly surprised by your statement while Paris hid her mouth, smiling knowingly.

“I never thought this day would come but I guess getting to know each other helps the relationship” He joked, waving dismissively before returning to his speech. You tried to keep your attention on your notes but Paris nudging you with her elbow and Hyunjin smirking smugly didn’t help much, so you eyed them impatiently, dropping your pencil to the paper.

“What?” You hissed, rolling your eyes, expecting their teasing.

“Are you trying to steal my man?” Paris asked in a feigned outraged tone, voice low to not be caught by the Professor, making Hyunjin snort, lowering his head to the desk, body trembling as he tried to muffle his laugh. You smirked, shaking your head in amusement as you picked up your pencil again, holding your laugh.

“Yeah, totally” You agreed, laughing through your nose, rolling your eyes playfully. Hyunjin lifted his torso, resting his elbow on the desk and cupping his cheek as he looked at you suggestively, a grin playing on his lips.

“I have to let you know that I’m faithful to my girlfriend” He joked, hand resting on Paris’ shoulder to claim her as his fake girlfriend. Paris grimaced, shaking her shoulder so he would drop his hand, which he did promptly. You darted your eyes between them, lacing her shoulders and bringing her closer to you so the situation could be less awkward, flashing him a mocking smile.

“Oh, you sure are” You taunted “You’re even buying me stuff behind her back” You joked, and he rolled his eyes.

“Please, it was just a coffee” He defended himself, and Paris giggled, turning her head to him but before she could say something he added “If it’s all it takes for you to fall for me I’ll fill you with coffees” He flirted jokingly, making you roll your eyes and scoff while Paris chuckled at you. Your chat was cut down by a warning glare from Mr.Lee, and the three of you pursed your lips, going back to pay attention to the classes.

Wednesday

You sat down, watching as Chan looked through the menu even though he always ordered the same stuff over and over again. You figured he just did it to tease you at this point, knowing you felt shy to blurt the order out since he was the one who was paying. You crossed your legs underneath the table, hands caressing the silky tablecloth, feeling its texture as you wondered if they really needed to make such high-quality stuff like that just so kids would spill all their sauce on it.

“If all Mr.Lee’s classes are teaching me anything, I’d say you need someone to hook up or something” Hyunjin teased you, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back on his chair, not giving a shit about behaving like a rich kid “Not even the poor table can escape now” He gesture to your hands and you stopped straightening the fabric for a moment, hands still on the table.

“Aren’t you too interested in my love life lately?” You arched your brow, looking at him smugly “I thought you only cared about your beloved girlfriend” You added, flashing Paris a smile, one that she promptly returned before giving him a teasing look.

“He has been too interested” She agreed, leaning forwards, eyes focused on him expectantly, “I think we’ll have to break up, sweetheart” She pouted, feigning disappointment as she gave him puppy eyes that made him scoff.

Chan frowned, raising his eyes from the menu.

“That’s right, I’ve been hearing this shit around” He joined, wavering his eyes between Hyunjin and Paris “Are you guys dating or something?” He asked curiously, making the three of you laugh. Who would have thought you would be laughing along with Hyunjin after all those years? Chan raised his brows, judging all of you, but he didn’t return his look at the menu, waiting for some explanation.

“I don’t know why the fuck people think we’re dating” Hyunjin answered him, shrugging as he looked at Paris in deep thought “I mean… I heard something about Friday’s party but I don’t know what made people think I’m into her” He mused.

“Oh, thank you!” She mocked, grinning at him in feigned pain, hand going to her chest “It’s nice to know I’m not worthy” She joked, and Hyunjin rolled his eyes at her.

“That’s not what I meant, okay?” He sighed “I mean that we didn’t even talk! I just drove you guys there and took you home… I mean, Y/N was together and nobody is saying that we’re doing a threesome” He reasoned.

“People know we don’t get along” You reminded him.

“Oh, so you’re not against threesomes?” He smiled knowingly, blinking at you a few times in mock innocence. You rolled your eyes, looking at Chan before pointing at his friend.

“Please, control your friend” Chan chuckled at you but didn’t say anything, resuming his studies at the menu “Can’t you interact like a normal human being, dude? You’re such a flirt!” You complained.

“I’m not flirting” He scoffed, resting his face in his hand as he put his elbow on the table “You would know if was flirting with you” He added, giving you an obnoxious smile.

“Well, I can’t remember a thing about Friday’s party” Paris mimicked Hyunjin’s position, twisting her head at you as she did, ignoring him completely “Are you guys sure that nothing happened?” She asked, eyes fixing on you for a few moments before fixing her gaze on Hyunjin.

You snapped your eyes at him, worry painting down your face as you expected him to not speak a thing about her slip up about Han. You held your breath in, eyes glued to Hyunjin’s mouth, attentive for any trying to mention Paris’ crush or anything similar to this. Hyunjin opened his mouth, unaware of your concerns.

“Well, I carried you?” He shrugged, and you sighed relieved, feeling your body relaxing slowly “Then you said some interesting things…” He teased, and you didn’t even think twice before your leg uncrossed itself and jerked his way, kicking him under the table “Ouch!” He snapped his head up, startled, hands going to cupping his knee as his face twisted in pain.

“Sorry, It was for Chan” You smiled apologetically, glancing at your friend that suddenly raised his head from the menu again, frowning at you in confusion “Let’s choose something quickly, I’m hungry” You changed the subject, fixing your gaze now on Chan, not missing the way Hyunjin rubbed his legs, pouting at you.

“Wait… What interesting things?” Paris asked, not buying your attempt to distract her. You darted your eyes to Hyunjin, and this time he seemed to notice your worries, snorting before sending you a look to calm you down.

“You said you loved me” He explained, sustaining your gaze for few seconds before looking at Paris, letting you know that it was all he was going to say. You sighed again, moving your eyes to Chan, who studied you silently.

“I was thinking of getting something different today” He explained himself, lowering the menu to the table, showing his whole face to you “To celebrate your new… Friendship or something?” He eyed Hyunjin in doubt, wondering if he could call both of you friends, and you chuckled at him.

“Celebrate our new something sounds nice” You admitted, “So that’s why you’re looking at the options like your life depends on it?” He smiled sheepishly and you let a wholeheartedly laugh out, getting Hyunjin and Paris’ attention.

“You’re so cute together” Paris voiced her thoughts, smiling fondly at you two, which made both of you roll your eyes and sigh.

“Will you ever get tired of this?” Chan asked displeased, looking at Paris as if she had one brain cell struggling to survive “We’re just friends” He added, handing the menu to you, giving up on choosing something new “Just pick up whatever you want, I can’t decide on anything” You took the menu, furrowing your brows as you looked at the options.

“I’m not saying you guys should date! I’m saying you’re cute friends” Paris defended herself, leaning to your side, to look at the menu with you, grimacing just like you when you saw the prices “Holy shit, is that how much you pay every time we come here?” She raised her eyes, surprised.

“They will try to choose the cheapest” Hyunjin rolled his eyes, taking the menu from your hands “It doesn’t even matter what we choose because they’ll like it… They can eat anything, I swear to you” He took a glance at the menu, humming when he found something that seemed to please him, raising his hand so he could order.

“You’re not so picky yourself’ You taunted “Weren’t you the one who loved the hot dog stand?” You smiled victoriously but he scoffed, crossing his arms when he saw the waiter coming in your way.

“When did I ever say that?” He acted dumb, raising his brows in feigned confusion. You rolled your eyes, waiting for him to order the food, speaking those strange French words that you would never try to pronounce. The waiter noted everything down, smiling politely and going away, as Hyunjin returned his gaze at you.

“You called it good” You reminded him “Actually! You called it really good” You emphasized, crossing your arms to copy him, both of you looking at each other mockingly.

“I’m sure I called it fine” He retorted.

“I call you a liar” You scoffed in disbelief “You ate it like a child!” You accused, and this time he laughed at you, a teasing grin spreading on his face.

“I call you delusional” He mocked “I’d never eat a stand hot dog like a child nor say it’s good” You rolled your eyes at him.

“Really good” You corrected.

“Really good” He agreed, smirking.

“Chan, you ate those! Wouldn’t you call it really good? Isn’t he being an ass?” You whined, nudging Chan under the table. He just rested his hand on his other one, watching both of you silently.

“You just called me an ass?” Hyunjin asked amused “She called me an ass! Won’t you do something?” He nudged Chan, joining you in disturbing him.

“Yes, I will call it not my problem” He grimaced, a half-heart grin on his face. You laughed, nudging Hyunjin this time, getting a knowing smirk from him. He leaned on Chan, resting his elbow on his shoulder and tilting his head.

“Weren’t you the one who was so concerned about all our arguments?” He teased “I thought you wanted to be our dad or something” He added, making Chan roll his eyes again, sighing.

“Now you’ll mock me for making you being friends” He whined, turning his head to Hyunjin and looking him in the eyes “You totally liked that hot dog, that shit is amazing” He finally stated, and you high-fived Paris, proud of your favorite stand being recognized.

“Well, I’m glad you like my choices, Daddy” You laughed, and this time Chan snorted, shaking Hyunjin’s arm off of him and leaning back on his chair.

“I’d be even happier if you choose not to argue about useless things and bringing me in” He gave you a fake smile, although you could see his eyes glinting in amusement.

“I guess you’ll have to love me with all my flaws” You joked, making him chortle, nodding fondly at you.

“Yeah, I guess I will” He gave in, smiling.

Thursday

Your week seemed to have at least 30 days inside it.

That was how much work you had to do since Monday. You felt relieved as you finally finished your part of Mr.Lee’s project while you were working at the Library today, writing all the discussions you had with Paris through the week and all the points you and Hyunjin had gathered until now. Today, you just needed to take a break now that you finished everything you had to do for the day.

As you approached the Hot Dog Stand, happy to see that this time it was way less crowded ─ Just a few people hanging around there─, you frowned at a tall figure looking around the options displayed, seeming really lost even though you only saw his back. You scoffed, shaking your head in amusement as you finally got to the stand, not even sparing him a glance.

“Make it two, Mister” You asked, delighted as you felt him flinch beside you. You glanced at him, a knowing smirk on your lips, as you silently showed off to him, leaning against the stand and tilting your head to the side “Look who is here” You taunted, getting off on how he shrunk, clearly embarrassed.

“Will I hear the end of it?” He whined, and you laughed at him, shrugging.

“Who knows?” You grinned, turning your back to the stand and crossing your arms, leaning on the stool there “I thought it wasn’t fancy enough for your rich ass” You teased him, and this time he snorted, shrugging back to you.

“You got me, I really loved it” He admitted “I was just teasing you yesterday… That’s what friends do, right?” He risked, and you smiled at him, this time no teasing on your face.

“Maybe a little bit too soon?” You said playfully, getting a light kick on your foot as an answer “You can just order a ten when you come here by yourself” You instructed him, and his eyes lit up immediately, a bright smile making way to his lips.

“Oh, thanks! I was going to ask for a usual but then I was like” He chortled before continuing, making you laugh “I just came here once the man won’t even remember me” He laughed at himself, leaning on the stool next to yours.

You fell into silence.

It wasn’t really an awkward silence but it wasn’t completely comfortable either. You glanced at each other once in a while, wondering if you should try to make some conversation up but letting it go, waiting for your order to be ready. As soon as the employee called you, giving the orders, you gave him enough money to pay for the both of you, and Hyunjin frowned at you.

“I will pay mine” He said but you nudged him with your foot as you fixed your food to take a bite.

“It’s a payback for the coffee” You stated, chewing your hot dog. He looked at you uncertainly, taking a bite of his own, and you rolled your eyes at him “I can pay for two hot dogs, Hyunjin” You chuckled. He waved his hands effusively, widening his eyes, and shaking his head eagerly; clearly nervous with how you took his hesitance.

“No! That’s not it!” He reassured, swallowing down his food, almost choking on it ”I just… I don’t know, it’s strange to be treated like this” He shrugged “I’m not used to it” He admitted, and you nodded, imagining that being rich had made him pay for a lot of things for his dates.

Not that it was a date.

“Oh! Are you really going to Han’s match tomorrow?” You asked curiously, suddenly remembering their bickering from the last week. He nodded while taking another bite at his food, stocking it on his cheeks and cupping his mouth to answer you.

“Yes, Paris is really excited I’m going with you guys… I guess she’s happy seeing us getting closer” He declared, shrugging “Or maybe she’s really into me and just blurted out his name for no reason” He joked, and you laughed along with him.

“No way” You shook your head, disagreeing with him “She didn’t even let you touch her shoulder and she let Han throw his arm around her… She totally likes him” You stated, and he hummed, pondering.

“Or maybe she’s just shy and doesn’t know how to take my touches” He suggested, and you rolled your eyes.

“Anyway, so you’re coming with us” You brought back the subject not so subtly, making him grin, wiggling his brows.

“Are we jealous?” He teased, making you scoff.

“Yeah, I’m even turning green” You extended your arm for him to see it, and he burst out laughing “It may also be because you make me sick” You said playfully, and he pushed you lightly, still laughing.

“Hey! You’re mean” He whined, and this time you smiled at him, amused.

Indeed a strange amicable week with your ex-nemesis.

////

Tagging: @thatrandomoneinthecorner

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minniepetals · 4 years

Text

butterscotch.04

— summary: as the snow continues falling, your love for one another only grows more and more

— pairing: bts x reader

— genre: fluff, slight angst, poly!au, ceo!au

— word count: 8.7k

— warnings: brief mention of an unhealthy past relationship

╰ part 1: buttercream / part 2: buttercup / part 3: buttermilk / part 4: butterscotch / part 5: butterfly

"Jimin! Jimin!"

Upon hearing the loud call of his name, Jimin was quick to look up from his papers where you rushed for the windows with eyes that glowed like a little kid.

"It's snowing!" You gasped in awe as you stared at the little white flakes that came flying down from above. "It's so beautiful. First day of snow on the first day of December and-"

You stopped in mid-sentence the second you turned around, trying to get Jimin's attention, only to come face to face with the said man whose arms stretched out to trap you between his body and the window. "W-what are you doing?" You stuttered, head turned away to avoid his intimidating stare in hopes of him not catching your blush. But you knew Jimin would always know even with his eyes closed.

"Don't scare your boss like that," he said, warm breath hitting your face.

"Hm?"

"It's okay to get excited, Miss Y/N, but don't you think yelling 'Jimin, Jimin' would cause me to think something was wrong?"

"O-oh." Still, it shouldn't have given him the excuse to try and attack your heart at any moment he could. "I'm sorry."

"It's quite rude apologizing without looking at the person's eyes. Quite rude not making eye contact with your boss when you are speaking in general."

Why was he like that? Always in the mood to make you flustered and for some reason, your heart would always skip a beat or two no matter how long it had been since you've begun dating. Jimin smirked at the sight of you who was trying to compose herself as you turned back to face him again, eyes looking into his like a cute little puppy but was soon to disappear and look a blushing mess because you couldn't take his piercing gaze.

"I-I'm sorry for..for scaring you, Mr. Park," you stuttered to which Jimin responded with a swipe of his tongue on his upper lip.

"Hm..." Deep honey dropped voice that had your knees weak. "Should I forgive you? Or not?"

You pouted. "Jim-"

"Hey, do you—"

You gasped at the new voice that walked into the room and was quick to push Jimin away out of panic and he grunted as he landed on the floor.

"Maknae, learn to knock, will you? Otherwise baby girl will get scared and accidentally hurt me." He frowned with displeasure as he took the hand you offered him because you hadn't meant to push him away that hard.

"I wouldn't have to knock if the two of you weren't up to no good," Jungkook remarked sassily while plopping himself on a sofa. "See, this is why having Y/N as your assistant isn't good. She's a distraction," he paused, giving you a smile, "in the best way possible," before looking back at Jimin. "You should fire her so that I can make her mine instead. After all, I'd be able to keep the flirting down to a two."

"Fire her my butt," Jimin retorted. "She's the last I'll be firing until the day I'm old enough to retire."

Your heart skipped a beat.

"Not fair," the maknae pouted.

It was subtle, the way he worded it, but you couldn't help but smile at just those simple words. Until the day he was old enough to retire, meaning he meant to keep you as theirs forever. A sweet silent promise of everlasting love.

You went about your day repeating those words over and over in your head. Sometimes you'd miss a certain command Jimin would order you to do but either way, you felt too happy. Some part of you felt like a schoolgirl who was having her first boyfriend, first love, give her the promise of true love. Yet perhaps the only difference between that and yourself was the fact that maybe they'd indeed be yours until the end.

Your last loves.

It had been about four beautiful years since you've accidentally confessed one late night and nothing had ever left you to reconsider your life choices. You were happy, truly happy. Even through the bad days and rough moments, they made you happy.

A rare love that everyone had always wished to have.

"You're quite happy today," Yoongi noted with a light chuckle as you continued staring at the snow outside from the passenger seat. "Did something good happen?" He asked as he took a left turn. "I heard Jimin scolded you a lot today and you aren't one to usually forget things. What's got you distracted, hm?"

"I just," you sighed dreamily, "I just love you guys so much."

The car fell silent and for that reason, you turned around to look at Yoongi, worried for his lack of response. "Yoon?" You called, suddenly becoming self-conscious as his face turned static and serious as he abruptly pulled the car aside to park just off the road and you looked away and down your lap, fingers fiddling with each other. "What's wrong?" Had you gotten the message wrong? Maybe they didn't really have any thought of the future yet and you had gotten too caught up in your daydreams?

Before you knew it, however, his cold fingers held your face, causing you to shiver, and the second you turned to face him, Yoongi's lips came crashing onto your lips.

He kissed you with passion, with the same need you could tell that he was in fact just as in love with you as you were and your heart began drumming rapidly. No matter how long it had been since your first kisses, they never ceased to make your heart flutter with excitement.

"You can't expect me not to kiss you when you say such a thing like that," he whispered the moment he leaned away just enough for him to rest his forehead against you.

"We've said those words a thousand times to each other," you said, laughing a little.

"It just makes me happy someone like you who's always so serious about her work and never likes getting off task would ever get distracted because we've been occupying your thoughts." He leaned in again to place a softer kiss upon your lips before giving you a soft peck on your forehead. Then he backed away to sit on his seat again, laying his head on the cushion of the seat. "I have a secret to tell you," he whispered.

You laid your hand into his, fingers intertwining into each other. "What is it?"

"I fell in love with you from the first moment we met eyes," Yoongi confessed. You chuckled lightly, smiling softly as you gave him a squeeze and the man looked at you, frowning. "Why aren't you surprised?"

"Seokjin told me once, about four years ago."

"Screw him," he grunted disappointedly. "He ruined my damn plans since four years ago."

"Hey, it's okay," you giggled as you placed a light kiss on his pale hand.

"Point is," Yoongi looked away and you could see a small hint of blush on his cheek, "I was happy and content, you know, being with the guys. It was a life I never thought I'd ever have, everything felt complete. But then I saw you and my mind was all over the place thinking about how damn great life would be, even better than it already was, if you were in it."

"Really?" You blinked, a little taken back someone like you who hadn't even spoken to the man had made him go all crazy with just a glance of your face.

Yoongi nodded. "And then when we were finally able to speak? I fell even more in love."

You grinned and quickly cooed as you reached out to pinch his soft cheeks. "You loved me from the beginning, Yoon? You're so adorable!"

"Stop it," he huffed, the blush growing rosier.

You laughed. "Well, look at us now. Happy and in love."

He nodded, smiling sweetly while leaning in again to place little eskimo kisses on you. "Happy and in love."

Suddenly the ring of one of your phones went off and Yoongi groaned at the sweet moment being taken away from the two of you.

"What?" You snickered at how grumpy his voice turned out.

"It's past midnight and you guys aren't home," you could hear Jungkook whining. "Are you alright? Is Y/N alright? Did Y/N get kidnapped and you had to go to her rescue or something?"

"Yeah, something like that."

"Yoongi," you laughed aloud, something that didn't go past Jungkook's hearing.

"Stop stalling, the two of you," he grunted.

"I heard a snowstorm's coming our way soon so hurry back," Namjoon came onto the line and Yoongi rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be careful driving. We'll be back soon."

"You'd better or I'm locking you guys out!" Seokjin shouted from the background.

"Love you too hyung."

"Hey, baby?"

"Yeah?" Jungkook answered from the other line of the phone.

"Promise not to get mad?"

A small moment of silence passed before he let out a sigh. "What did you do?"

You whined. "You have to promise me you won't get mad at me first."

Another moment of silence and you cringed at the way the blizzard was blowing against your face, making you shiver some more as you hugged yourself. "Okay, I promise."

A little sigh of relief left you but you knew you couldn't let your guard down just yet. "Go into a room alone without any of the guys there to hear you."

"I'm already alone, babe, just spill."

"Okay, okay." You shivered again at the harsh coldness. "You know how the guys don't like it when I drive during wintertime? Yeah well, I woke up early this morning and decided to go on a drive 'cause why not and may have forgotten to watch the forecast that stated there'd be a big blizzard today and the car may have broken down and I may be waiting in the freezing cold for a tow truck to come."

You waited for his reply, lips pressed against each other with the anxiety eating you down because you felt disappointed in yourself and was sure Jungkook would be too.

"And, you're calling me because?"

You pouted. "I'm cold and I figured if I had to tell one of you guys, it'd be you because I know you wouldn't scold me as harshly as the rest."

"Says who?" He asked almost as if he was offended.

"Says you who's great at disobeying rules."

"Hey, I..-" He paused, "Yeah you're right." You giggled and he mirrored your amusement. "So where are you? I'll make an excuse to come pick you up."

You gasped, face suddenly lighting up due to the relief. "Thank you a billion times!"

"You owe me."

"Right, of course."

It wasn't long before Jungkook showed up and you found yourselves sitting in his car waiting for the tow truck to arrive, which you were sure would be quite a while.

"You know," Jungkook began with his feet raised upon the steering wheel as his seat was set back and lowered, "they're going to find out sooner or later."

"I know," you pouted. "But I'd rather enjoy this moment of no scoldings for now."

"Won't they get even madder since you're stalling telling them the truth and," he gasped, suddenly aware, "Crap, what if I get in trouble because I'm helping you out?"

"I promise I won't throw you under the bus like that," you quickly said. "But then they'll get madder 'cause I dragged you into this mess."

"Hey.." Jungkook reached out to ruffle your hair as a way of comforting you. "Just give them your puppy eyes and they'll forget all about it," he feigned a big smile.

"Forget it," you frowned, looking back out the window where everything was white. "It's been four years, they're not gonna fall for the same charms all over again."

Sadly.

"Why not?" The maknae shrugged. "I still fall for it every time you do it."

Suddenly, you were back to smiling. "Aww, little bun still has a soft spot for me?"

He mirrored your grin. "It's never gone away, baby, and it never will. But seriously," he held out his hand for you to take and squeezed it the moment you gave it to him, "four years is just a number and love will never falter if it's true so stop worrying so much. The only reason why they'd be upset is because they're concerned for your wellbeing. I would have probably scolded you too but I also do crazy things so I can't really be a brat to you about it." Cheekily, you nodded in agreement and he rolled his eyes before growing serious again. "Just because time has passed doesn't mean the love has lessen. We still love you just as much as when we began dating, maybe even more. And you're still the baby girl whom we love and cherish until the end of time."

Until the end of time.

The familiar sound of your ringtone began to go off and chills ran down your spine. But Jungkook just gave you a nudge with a sweet assuring smile.

"Go on," he urged, beckoning to the sweet nickname of Seokjin's that read on your phone. You picked your phone up hesitantly. "And remember, no lying or they'll be even more upset. I learned that the hard way."

"Yes, yes, I know." You laughed before taking a deep inhale and exhale then sliding the answer button. "H-hello?"

You held your breath as Seokjin replied, the worry already clear in his tone and you felt even more afraid. But with Jungkook by your side holding your other hand and giving you sweet encouraging looks, you went through the hard process of getting scolded by not just Seokjin but everyone else who heard his shouting from wherever he was.

The call ended twenty minutes later and your face was sullen by the time you placed your phone down.

"Good job, you did well," Jungkook praised from where he sat but your brows could only stay furrowed.

"I'm so dumb," you mumbled regretfully.

"Hey, no you're not," he consoled, soft and gentle as he laid a hand on your shoulder. "It's just one little mistake, they should be happy you aren't hurt or anything. You're owning up to your mistake and telling them the truth, not everyone can do such a thing, Y/N."

"But still," you sniffed and his heart fell at a slip of tear falling from your eyes. You hated getting scolded, always wanting to be the best in everyone's eyes. He knew you were a perfectionist who didn't take failure as something too lightly. You'd think about your mistakes for days and even years later and you'd find yourself cringing and regretting a mistake you've done long beforehand.

"Hey, it's okay." He held his warm hands upon your face, cupping it while gently brushing away the tears. You were so sensitive, too pure and precious for the world. "We don't love you any less, you know."

"But I'm upset at myself for even-"

Jungkook cut you off with a sweet kiss, one that left you almost breathless once he pulled away. "Forget about it," he said, "let's make snow angels."

You chuckled while rolling your eyes. "What are you, five?"

He narrowed his eyes at you accusingly. "I seem to remember you love every activity one can do with snow so I guess that makes us both five."

You grinned. "I guess that does."

He was always so great at making you feel better and forgetting about life for a moment to have fun and be happy despite the chaos. The wind was freezing cold but Jungkook held onto you tightly, giving you his pair of warm gloves because you lacked them and zipping you all the way up so you'd be a little warmer than you were before.

The day was fun and wonderful with you and Jungkook playing like little kids meeting snow for the very first time. He'd kiss you at any moment he could steal and run after you whenever you tried escaping from him.

But then the tow truck arrived too soon for your liking and the two of you drove home. Jungkook had to go through a mild scolding because he let you play around in the snow when you were sensitive to the cold, cheeks and the tip of your nose blush pink with hands that trembled, wet and freezing from grabbing too much snow. So, of course, you were also scolded not just for taking the car out (again) but also for forgetting about your wellbeing and having too much fun in the snow.

Hoseok made you a warm bubble bath in which you sat in while he washed your hair because you were still too frozen to try and do it yourself.

The whole time it was silent as he continued running his fingers through your hair before he took your hand and a loofah.

"I-I can do it myself," you try to say as you took your hand back, hoping he'd just let you reflect on your own without him or anyone being in the room with you.

Yet Hoseok stayed silent as he took your hand again and you allowed him. You had to when he was like that, face as serious as could be with a silent gaze. Yet his hands were gentle, a contrast to his static expression and you could only look at anywhere else but his eyes because Hoseok was too intimidating when he was silent.

He made you feel so small. Normally you'd like it — when he'd smile and giggle and pull you into his overprotective arms — but sitting there in the large bathtub with him silently helping you out, made your lips quiver because you couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"Don't look like that."

You looked up with a soft hum, gulping at his quiet but stern demand.

Yet Hoseok paid no mind to your gaze as he continued running the loofah through your arms. "Jungkook said you cried," he stated just as his hands moved onto your neck and you shivered nervously at the sensation. "You're always so sensitive when we scold you." Down your collarbones. "What are you thinking, hm? You're not thinking that we'd leave you just because of a small fight, right?"

"N-no." You paused, fixing your sentence. "I hope not." He remained silent but secretly hated those words coming out of you. "I just...I hate letting you down."

"Mmn," Hoseok hummed as his hands went around your neck and back, allowing you to shift closer to him. "And do you know why we're upset?" He asked and you shivered at how close his lips were to your ear, how close you were to his exposed collarbones.

"Because you don't want me to get hurt."

"That's right," he nodded. "What do we have to say to ourselves, hm?"

You bit your quivering lip, wanting to tear up at just his tone alone but kept it in. "I'm sorry."

Hoseok could hear it, the tremble in your voice but decided to ignore it for the moment like a sadistic boss. "You've always been a good girl, haven't you?"

"I-I think so," you stuttered, voice small, "I hope so."

He frowned, dissatisfied. "Haven't we taught you to be good to yourself?"

"Y-yes."

"Then do it, baby girl."

Damn.

If only he wasn't actually upset at you but either way, you couldn't deny the fact that Hoseok was a sexy man.

"I've always been a good girl," you said.

Hoseok finally let a smirk tug at his lips. "Good girl." His praise made you go weak and you were so thankful you were sitting rather than standing up. He leaned back, placing both hands on your shoulders and you shivered once more as he came face to face with you again, eyes of a hard demeanor. "But just because you're usually a good girl doesn't mean we'll let you go that easily."

He smiled slightly at the blush on your cheeks. "R-right."

"Are you scared of me, Y/N?"

"I am not."

"Good." Hoseok took your chin to hold your head up and leaned in, his lips capturing yours in a tempting and alluring kiss, one that you couldn't help but to kiss him back with the same passion. He held you close, captivating your heart and had it drumming a thousand times more than normal speed. You wanted to hold him too, to wrap your arms around his neck or just hold his shirt in general but you were too afraid to get him wet.

Once the two of you let go, you were left breathless with rapid breathing that was harsh and hard.

"The rules are only there because we worry."

You nodded at his words. "I know and I'm sorry."

"I love you," he said, capturing your lips again.

"I love you too."

"Joon?" You woke up from your dreams only to frown with worry as you watched Namjoon getting up from the bed looking all frantic. "What's wrong?" You asked while gently taking Taehyung's arms and Seokjin's foot off of you so that you could get up. "Isn't today our first day of the holiday weekend? Are we going back to work already?"

"No, you guys aren't, I am," he stated and rushed out the doors after grabbing his set of suit.

You frowned, concern filling your face and just as you were about to leave the bed, Taehyung had your hand.

"Baby?" He called, half asleep but still concerned with his deep croaky voice.

"Go back to sleep baby, it's five in the morning," you said, pressing a kiss upon his cheek. Once his eyes drooped again, you stepped away from the large bed to rush after Namjoon.

You walked into his office where you found the man already in his dress pants and putting on his white dress shirt with a bit of difficulty because he was in such a rush. Sighing at the sight, you walked up to the man, stopping his clumsy fingers to lay them at his side so that you could button the shirt up for him.

"You should go back to sleep," Namjoon sighed.

You shook your head. "There's an emergency, isn't there?"

"Not too concerning but I still have to be there since I'm the big boss."

"I'll come with you."

"No," he stated, clasping his large hands around you to stop your fingers from trying to button him up. "Stay here, it's too cold out there and I don't want to have to worry about you."

"You won't have to," you assured, "I'll be by your side the whole time."

"But-"

"You can't even dress your own self up, you really expect to do an even bigger thing on your own?" You asked him while giving him the pointed look. For a moment Namjoon felt conflicted until eventually he gave into your stern gaze and let his hands fall back to his sides, allowing you to continue helping him.

"You like your sleep," he pointed out as he slipped into his suit jacket and you went on to button that up.

You chuckled and he mirrored your action. "Yeah well, I like you more."

A little sigh left him as he placed a quick peck on your lips. "How did we ever get so lucky?"

You smiled. "I ask myself every day."

"I guess we were fated from the beginning, huh?"

"I guess we are."

Fate. What a wonderful word to describe the relationship as you kept by Namjoon's side the whole day while the two of you ran around to fix the damages caused by some employees who got some instructions wrong and therefore almost causing a catastrophe. Luckily through your quick thinking and Namjoon's intelligence, you were able to fix things a lot quicker than he would have if he were alone in the process.

"You deserve a reward."

You blinked, taken back by Namjoon's words. "But I didn't do anything."

"Are you kidding me?" He scoffed in disbelief as he leaned back against the elevator, arms crossed against his chest to check you out. "If it wasn't for you, I would have never figured out where the source of the problem began." You were about to protest when he took your hand, taking a few steps towards you before letting his head rest on your shoulder. "I'm serious, babe. You're a lifesaver. I'd make you my assistant but that brat would never let you go." The two of you chuckled knowingly at who he was referring to. "Have they called?"

"Yeah, Yoongi called to check in and I've updated him on the situation."

"Too bad our first supposed day off was wasted," he mumbled regretfully.

"We still have a week left," you assured him with a light squeeze of his hand, "Christmas will be here and we'll get to sleep in as much as we'd like."

"You'd like that, won't you?" Namjoon smirked as he leaned back to ruffle your head and you chuckled in response.

A ding was heard and the elevator doors split open.

"Joon, what do I get for people who has everything?" You asked the man as the two of you began walking out.

He chuckled knowingly. "You ask that every year, don't you?"

"Because it's always impossible to buy gifts for people who aren't in need of anything. Every year I have to think of the perfect gift and it gets harder and harder."

"Well then, just don't buy them anything this year."

"What?" You scoffed with a bit of a surprise. "But Christmas is a time for giving."

He stopped walking and held you back just as you were about to walk out the entrance door where the snowflakes were still falling down from the sky. "I don't want anything and neither do the guys," he told you.

But you could only narrow your eyes. "That's a lie. I know Jungkook and Taehyung are always secretly looking forward to gift unwrapping."

"Not this year, I promise you."

"But then what will we do for Christmas if there are no gifts to open?"

"Just spend time with each other like we always do every Christmas minus the gift unwrapping."

"Okay." You smiled, meeting his lips with your own. "As long as we're together."

"That's right," Namjoon nodded with his arms wrapped around you, "We've got everything we want, starting with you," you giggled as he bopped your nose, "and there isn't anywhere else I'd rather be."

"Can I try something?"

"Um..." Seokjin's eyes narrowed suspiciously at you but shrugged. "Sure?"

"Let me kiss you."

Huh.

You weren't one to initiate kisses that often since being in a group of seven boyfriends who had experience with relationships unlike you meant they were less shy about it, and you did do it from time to time but not through asking.

"Okay," Seokjin said, ready to pucker up his lips.

"Close your eyes," you ordered and he eyed you with suspicion again.

"What is this? Your first time trying to kiss someone? It's been four years, Y/N."

"Just close them!" You whined through a cute pout and the man chuckled.

"Fine."

He let his eyes flutter close and you took a moment to take in his features, handsome as ever, before you pressed your hands on top of his shoulders and lifted yourself from the bed to give him a quick peck. A second passed with his eyes still closed and lips smiling and you leaned in again for another one. Then another. By the time the fourth one came, your legs were wrapped around his waist and Seokjin held you close as the kiss lasted longer than the past ones, sweeter and slower, a kiss he allowed you to take a bit of control in with the two of you still in bed and in your pajamas.

"Is that what it was?" Seokjin chuckled the moment the kiss ended. "You wanted to see how it was to be in control of a kiss?"

Though your cheeks blushed, you nodded and your boyfriend praised you for getting the courage up to do so, something that made your cheeks even rosier and had him lean in to place a kiss on your cheek.

"I thought you said we weren't the first relationship you had."

"You aren't but my first one wasn't very good," you told him with a sad sigh that had him watch you with concern. "He was kind of a jerk and I was tempted to date him, I guess. I had no experience in love and he told me he'd take care of me very well but then things didn't go too well. I wanted to take things slow and he got a little impatient and tried to steal my first kiss so that was when I broke it off with him. And my second one, he was better than the first." Seokjin's heart fell for a moment staring at your soft smile as you reminisced on the memory but silently sighed a breath of relief when he realized it was rather a sad smile you had on instead of a happy one.

"But the thing about that one is that he was my childhood friend," you went on then added in a light chuckle. "He went to beat up my first boyfriend the second he found out how we ended. He was a good guy, a good friend, took care of me well as a boyfriend so I guess it was my fault we broke up."

Seokjin's brows furrowed. "Why would it be your fault?"

"Because he fell out of love with me," you said with eyes that grew somber and Seokjin's heart almost broke at just the look alone. "We didn't break up in a peaceful way. He said some cruel things and I was left broken for a long time."

"None of that is your fault," Seokjin told you as he sent a light squeeze against your hips. He held your chin up so that you could meet his sincere gaze as he spoke, needing you to see your worth. "He fell out of love with you, that's his fault for not seeing you as the perfect most beautiful woman. And if I knew you back then, maybe I would have punched him in the face."

You chuckled. "Jin-"

"Or maybe I would have bought him a cup of coffee and thanked him for letting you go so that you could meet better people, like me and the guys."

You smiled as your heart swelled. "I love you, thank you for coming into my life."

Seokjin swooned. "Oh baby girl, it's us that should be thankful." He leaned in to kiss you, almost letting your lips dance for longer but he leaned back too quick for your liking. "So, why'd you ask me out of all the guys anyway?"

And suddenly you were back to blushing again. "W-well, you're the eldest so I just thought, you know, just thought you'd be the least likely to tease me."

"Ah," he chuckled. "You're a little more comfortable doing it with me, huh?"

"Y-yeah," you admitted shyly before looking back at him with timid eyes. "Can I try it again? I think I like it."

A smirk played on his lips while his heart fluttered because you were just too cute. "Go on, baby."

You leaned down while he leaned up and you captured his lips again, going a little further as he allowed you the dominance, something you were still shy about but fought through the timid state to continue on. Seokjin tasted so sweet below you and he almost grabbed your face to take back the control, an instinct of his, but held himself back for your sake.

You were flushed red by the time your lips disconnected. "How was it?" The man asked with a light pat on your bottom.

"You're sweet, Jin, so sweet."

He chuckled while leaning up to place light eskimo kisses on you. "You're so cute."

You made him promise you he wouldn't tell any of the guys about it because you were still shy, something he was totally understanding about. But you should have known Seokjin wasn't one to keep secrets from the guys unless absolutely necessary so by the time he was alone with the guys, you being away with a chauffeur to go for dress shopping for that annual Christmas Eve party you'd all attend, he ended up blurting it out before he could stop himself.

"Y/N did what?" Jimin's mouth gaped while the rest just stared with bewilderment.

"Crap, I wasn't supposed to tell you," the eldest realized just a second too late.

"I bet she was cute about it. Was she cute, hyung?" Jungkook asked, already imagining a picture in his head at the thought of you on top of Seokjin, fighting through your natural shy self for some dominance.

"So cute her cheeks were blushing but damn did she do it so well," Seokjin recalled only to cringe afterward, "But you can't mention it to her that I told you otherwise she'll get upset at me and I do not want our girlfriend getting mad at me."

"But I want in, hyung," Taehyung whined through his pout.

"Why'd she go to you and not me?"

"Why'd she go to you and not any of us?" Namjoon corrected to which Yoongi rolled his eyes.

Seeing them so desperate in wanting to know how it felt to have you in control of a kiss, just because of the experience, Seokjin could only smirk as he leaned against his fist with his elbow propped up against the arm of the sofa. "Hmm, I wonder."

They all groaned in unison.

"How was she, hyung?" Hoseok asked.

"Hmm...I wonder."

It was then that they knew Seokjin was never going to tell them how the experience actually went and all whined about how unfair it was for Seokjin keeping you to himself.

"Jin hyung said that you—"

In the middle of the ballroom where Taehyung and you stood dancing during the Christmas Eve party, he stopped himself in mid-sentence before he could say anything further and you looked up at him, pretty eyes looking confused and if you weren't so shy about PDAs, he would have stolen a kiss from you right then and there. You were too pretty. Every time they'd bring you to some sort of event, you'd get all dolled up with pretty makeup that wasn't too cakey because you had a natural beauty, and your dress would be the most perfect in the room, outshining everyone else who had hoped to shine that evening.

Your dressed hugged you tightly, red and sparkly with soft red lipstick and Taehyung could only groan because he was upset you went to his hyung rather than him for an experiment on having control in a kiss.

Why couldn't it be him? Why did it have to be Seokjin? And why hadn't the others said anything to you about it? He was sure one of them would spill the beans that Seokjin in fact broke your promise so he wouldn't have to face an upset Seokjin in case he was the one who told you the truth. But then again, maybe that was why; because the others were also afraid of the consequences of disobeying their eldest hyung.

"What did Seokjin say?" You asked the man.

"U-Uh," Taehyung stuttered, suddenly nervous. Why did you have to be afraid of kissing them? He wasn't at all intimidating, at least not towards you. But why Seokjin? Maybe because the others were more likely to tease you? Oh — yeah, that was it.

"Tae?" You called, concerned.

"He said that the desserts are to die for so let's go check it out," your boyfriend quickly made the excuse, abruptly stopping in the middle of the dance to drag you away, something you couldn't help but be confused about but still followed him either way.

"You're being weird," you eyed the man as he handed you a plate with a slice of cake.

"Me?" He scoffed. "I'm just hungry," he said, plopping a piece of cake into his mouth. "Oh, and I need to pee so let's go."

"Wait but I haven't-" Suddenly he was grabbing you by the arm again after putting both of your plates back onto the table and dragged you away. "If you need the bathroom, go by yourself, Taehyung," you grunted as you struggled to keep up with how fast he was going especially with the heels you were wearing.

By the time the two of you were out of sight from everyone else, Taehyung had you trapped between him and the wall with a small smirk on his face.

"You didn't need to pee, did you?" You rolled your eyes, realization hitting you with the sly grin he had on.

"No, but I do want something."

"What?"

"A Christmas present."

You pouted, shoulders slumped. "But Namjoon said we weren't doing any of that this year and Christmas is in a few minutes, I can't go out to buy something for-"

"I'm not talking about gifts like that," Taehyung cut you off. "I want something else."

You tilted your head to the side. "Something else? What's that?"

He smirked. "A kiss."

You blinked. "A kiss?"

"A kiss."

Confused, you scratched your head. "But I can give you a kiss any other time, why would you so desperately want a kiss for your Christmas present?"

"Because it'll be different."

"Different how?"

"I want you to take the initiative. I want you to try and take control." Smart, smart Taehyung, he thought, praising himself. What a great way to try and get what he wanted the most without exposing anyone.

The cheeky grin curled at his lips as he watched a blush quick and easy to form on your cheeks. "C-control?"

"Yeah, why not?" Taehyung shrugged nonchalantly as if he hadn't known of your little moment with his hyung a few days prior. "It isn't that difficult."

"Yes, it is!"

"Oh come on, you—" he stopped himself again from almost blurting out the fact that he had taken the initiative for Seokjin and almost grew mad because you had been willing to give it to his hyung. "Please?" He pled instead, puppy eyes and all.

You groaned, looking away from him. "But it's almost midnight, the guys will be expecting us to be with them."

"And what better time to kiss me than when the clock strikes twelve?"

"They'll get mad."

"It's just one night."

"But Tae-"

"Come on, the new years haven't come yet and that's even more of a special night for the eight of us. Christmas is one step down."

You frowned. "But won't you be able to convince them easier when the New Year comes? It'll be your birthday anyways."

Like a little child, he whined. "I can't wait that long."

"It isn't-"

"I'm not letting you go," Taehyung declared as he leaned in a little closer so that you would know he wasn't going to give up until you gave in to his wishes. "Kiss me before the clock strikes twelve and we'll be back by their sides in no time," he offered and you groaned again.

He was such a brat, sometimes even worse than Jimin but you knew you'd never be able to deny him anything, not when it came to any of them. So you heaved a sigh and looked into his gaze, a slight pout resting on your face. "Fine."

Taehyung cheered and allowed you to slide your hands from his chest to his shoulders, ready to fall even more in love with you. The closer you inched forward with feet that reached to its tippy-toes because he was tall, the quicker his smile faded into a serious expression.

And then, your lips met his and the world fell away as you fought against the hesitation to take some control. He swooned the moment your lips danced for dominance and groaned into your mouth. You were just too sweet he wanted to take you home right at that moment.

But he knew he couldn't be selfish and keep you to himself for long, not when both of your phones chimed at once, indicating to the fact that someone had texted the group chat, probably wondering where the two of you were.

Taehyung whined when you pulled away, leaning in to chase after your lips but you pushed his chest back teasingly.

"Come on, let's get back to the boys."

"More," he pouted.

"Maybe later. We wouldn't want them to get upset, now do we?"

He groaned as you dragged him away and back towards the ballroom where you were quick to find the rest and join them.

"Your lips are swollen," Jimin gave you both pointed looks and while you blushed, Taehyung only smirked as he leaned in to whisper into Jimin's ears, words you couldn't hear but was sure Taehyung had been up to no good when Jimin was left gaping his mouth as he looked back at you.

But right as you were about to question the 95 liners, Hoseok cleared in throat, catching your attentions in a silent demand of focusing on the clock.

Everyone had gathered around the Christmas tree, familiar faces around the room, people you'd meet at other parties and some you'd meet only at that specific Christmas event every year. Either way, everything was warm and loving and as you stood between Hoseok and Namjoon, they took your hands into theirs, holding it tightly and you smiled at the tradition of your small group holding each other's hands.

By the time the clock struck twelve, words of 'Merry Christmas' were shouted into the large room and then everyone scattered away once again.

Some would stay for a moment longer, others, like you and the boys that night, left just as soon as time allowed them.

"I'm sleepy," you yawned with arms stretched out as soon as you got into the limousine.

"Stay awake for a little longer, baby," Yoongi chuckled and you pouted.

"But why?"

"Because," they all shared a knowing look which had you frowning, "we've got a special present for you."

You were wide awake again, quick to point the finger at Namjoon. "You liar."

"Liar?" Namjoon raised a brow.

"You told me not to get you guys anything since we weren't going to do the traditional present exchange like everyone else does on Christmas and now you're pulling this one me?"

"Did I?" He feigned innocence.

"That's not fair, I didn't get you guys anything," you pouted. "It was a test, wasn't it? To see how spoiled I really was and you hadn't meant we'd actually not do gift exchange? And I failed, didn't I?"

You wanted to cry with the disappointment in yourself hitting you hard in the chest. You had always been spoiled by them and they've always claimed they loved spoiling you but maybe they've gotten tired of it and wanted to test your true love for them, not the love of them spoiling you — which was totally untrue but you've already messed up and—

"Baby, it isn't like that," Jungkook said with warm hands that cupped your face to make sure you knew he was sincere. "I promise."

Still, you couldn't get the crease between your brows to disappear. "I'm still being spoiled either way."

"Because we want to, baby," he avowed.

"We love spoiling you," Taehyung nodded in agreement.

"We came up with this gift together," said Jimin, "one gift from the seven of us, for you."

"Trust us, hm?" Seokjin asked of you.

For some reason, being in that vehicle as Jungkook let go of you and you stared at each one of them whose eyes were solely on you, it was probably the most serious you had ever seen them outside of business hours. They liked fooling around, liked teasing you and each other, so to see them like that had only told you that they really wanted to give you that gift.

Whatever it was.

"Okay," you said and the smiles returned on their faces.

"You'll like it," Hoseok said with a pause, "hopefully."

You took his hand and squeezed it. "You know I'll love any present you give me."

Surprisingly the limo drove you right back home where you all got out. Only, they didn't let you retire to your shared bedroom, nor staying in the large living room.

They led you up two flight of stairs, past everything you knew that was in the house and into a specific room you hadn't ever seen before since living there. You gasped at the sight in front of you, glass windows above and around you that allowed you to see the beautiful stars and the pretty view of the city on the horizon, with beautiful pillars that were painted of the pretty galaxy and your heart began beating rapidly. It was like walking into the room of the gods of the stars, of the galaxy, and you couldn't help but gasp in awe at everything.

You've told them before that their eyes always glowed of a thousand starlight and perhaps that was the theme to the Christmas present.

"Why did you keep this room a secret from me?" You asked as you ran forward to press your hand against the glass, looking at the beautiful stars from above. "How did you keep this a secret? I thought I knew every room in this mansion."

"We kept it hidden with hopes of special moments like this," Seokjin told you.

Your attention still on the view, you chuckled lightly. "But Christmas happens every year, why reveal it now?"

Someone took your hand so that you could take your eyes off the view and back at them. You watched them in confusion under the dim purple lights that illuminated the room, heart beating even more for some reason at just the sight of the seven of them in front of you, handsome in suits, face more serious than you'd ever seen.

"We're lucky, you know," Yoongi began, "to have someone like you love us with all her heart. It still amazes me 'til this day that I'm actually dating the person whom I fell in love with at first sight. At first I thought it was just a silly crush, thought that I'd get over it because I had six other wonderful people I was in love with. But then when I first spoke to you and you stuttered cutely, cheeks blushing rosy pink, gosh my heart began beating faster than ever. You were just too pretty."

"I've always had this overwhelming urge to protect you," Namjoon chuckled after Yoongi. "You were small and cute, but held your head high and worked the hardest out of the new employees we received that week, and possibly even harding than the older employees. You'd voice in your thoughts about certain things when you had to, which saved us a lot of time that'd be wasted if you hadn't said your opinions. People are jealous of you because you try the hardest, because you grabbed our attention quicker than anyone else."

"They're jealous of your beauty," Taehyung added in. "They're jealous of the fact that you can still be a sweetheart and look so pretty. Which is stupid because they should be looking up to you instead but it's fine, you're the one we love anyways so it doesn't matter. But then your beauty also gets us overprotective because you steal the attention of other guys who wants you for themselves. I still have this urge to punch every man that looks at you in a certain way, that's why PDA is the best way to show them you belong to us."

"But we couldn't do that when you weren't ours before," Jungkook pouted. "It was painful, you know, seeing other guys flirt with you but not being able to do much because we didn't know whether you liked us or not and was afraid you wouldn't like us acting as if we were intruding in on your life. The night you confessed was something totally out of the blue, I had always imagined it'd be us having to get the courage to do the confessing but nope, you made the job so much easier."

Hoseok laughed as he recalled the moment. "It was cute, you climbing into my arms and nuzzling against me, whining about how I only treated you as a friend rather than a lady. Truth is, I've always dreamt of you doing something like that, being a clingy little kitty because you loved me and wanted me for yourself. But you've always been a shy little thing so I'm glad we managed to pull you out of your shell after all these years. I love every clingy moment from you, I adore it."

"It's a little sad when you don't see yourself with much worth though," Seokjin chimed in with lips pressed into a thin line. "I'd observe you and watch the way your eyes would scan your outfits because your bullies had said something cruel and untrue. You doubt yourself a lot, thinking you're not good enough but darling, you are so much more than who you see. Whatever kinds of people you've met in your past, their harsh words are irrelevant. You're special and pretty, you have a kind heart, you aren't a brat, you're the most selfless person we've ever met."

"And the most hardworking," Jimin added. "When I first hired you as my assistant, it wasn't because you were my girlfriend, it was because I was observing everyone in the building and watching their skills and you were the one that struck out to me. You're smart and quick and you keep up with me no matter how many tasks I'd give you, even going as far as refusing my kisses because you don't like slacking off." He pouted and you giggled. "All in all, none of those girls me and Jin hyung used to flirt with are as great as you. You're the prettiest, the cutest, most beautiful both inside and out."

"What is all this?" You asked, a bit overwhelmed by the sweet gestures and words you had already begun to tear up. "How can your Christmas presents keep getting better each year? Now I really regret not getting you guys anything."

"I told you, we need nothing from you," Namjoon assured. "All we want is your love and maybe, just maybe," he shuffled nervously while the rest began to avoid eye contact, teeth biting their lips, hands running on the back of their necks, fiddling with their fingers. You almost wanted to laugh at how cute they were, being so nervous. The first you've ever seen them in such a way.

"Maybe..what?" You asked, suddenly nervous yourself because of the way they were acting.

Namjoon cleared his throat and the fiddling and fidgetings stopped. They were back to looking at you with eyes that were still clearly nervous.

"Y/N Y/L, will you make us the happiest men on Earth?"

You blinked.

Wait, what?

Your heart pounded hard against your chest, tears blurring your vision as Namjoon took out a beautiful velvet box from his pocket. You blinked a few times more to rid of the tears in order to see them but nothing in that moment could ever stop the tears as Namjoon held open the box in front of you, revealing a beautiful diamond ring.

"Will you marry us?" He asked and your cry choked out a small squeaked as you nodded your head a dozen times.

"Yes, yes, yes," you cried and fell into their warm embraces.

The ring slipped onto your finger perfectly and the eight of you cried a little more with small laughs here and there as you shared kisses because you still couldn't believe it was real.

That night, you couldn't ever let go of one another, the happiness drowning in your kisses and embraces.

A fateful love that would last into eternity. Until the end of time.

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translations-by-aiimee · 3 years

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Dig a Grave to Dig Out a Ghost - Chapter 7

Original Title: 挖坟挖出鬼

Genres: Drama, Horror, Mystery, Supernatural, Yaoi

This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.

Chapter Index

Chapter 7 - Police Station

His early morning class was basically just background noise. After trying to listen to the professor, all the sentences blurred together until there was only a buzzing sound.

Lin Yan propped himself up with his elbow on the table, his head nodding off again and again.

"These Ming Dynasty shirts were made of jade-coloured cloth and silk. They had wide-sleeves and circular collars, with black ribbons and seams hanging down.

Even prisoners wore this style of clothing."

The city was immersed in sleep at midnight, and there was no activity insight. Lin Yan drove his car from the residential area to the main road, and the night breeze came in, blowing the hair on his forehead.

A person appeared silently in the middle of the road.

Lin Yan gasped. Too close to swerve out of the way, he subconsciously slammed on the brakes, "Squeak--"

The huge inertia made him rush forward. He prayed that he didn't get into an accident. When he looked up again, he saw the front of the car stopped less than two metres away from the person, but the person stood perfectly still as though he hadn't seen the car. There is no intention of moving out of the way at all. Did this guy want to die? Lin Yan's hand grabbed his chest. He flashed the car lights twice to signal to the person to move aside. After seeing the person clearly, Lin Yan's mind turned to static.

The man’s feet were reversed, with heels facing forward and toes facing backward.

He slowly raised his head towards Lin Yan. His head was a skull covered with chunks of flesh with bone peeking through. His lips were more than half-rotten, two rows of slanted white teeth exposed. There was a stiff, crooked grin that pulled at the corners of his mouth, and dark laughter sounded in Lin Yan's ears. . .

Lin Yan's body trembled and he was thrown back awake.

"Skirts were slightly lighter in colour in the early Ming Dynasty; white skirts were promoted during the Chongzhen period. There were one or two inches of embroidery around the hem of the skirts. . .

"At the end of the Ming Dynasty, it developed into eight or ten inches. Pleated skirts were very popular, with fine and large folds..."

It was the middle of the day, these were human voices.

. . . Was that a nightmare?

Lin Yan recovered from his mini heart attack and tried to slow his breathing, but his heart couldn't stop beating.

Hesitantly, a cold hand touched his hair lightly. It stopped on the back of his neck as if it were soothing, but it disappeared in an instant. Lin Yan froze. The anger and constant anxiety of being violated at any time would make anyone paranoid. His anger came to a breaking point; ghost encounters at night, dreaming of ghosts during the day, would it ever stop? With a wave of his hand, he threw the textbook to the side, slapped the table, stood up, and shouted, "Fucking try it again! Come at me, I'm not afraid!"

The book fluttered across the table and chairs in the front row, and the papers in the book scattered like snow. Lin Yan stood in a daze, and it took a moment for him to snap out of it. Looking around, his confusion melted into overwhelming embarrassment. He saw the hundreds of students in the classroom turned back and stared at him. The teacher that taught his Ming Dynasty costume research class stood on the podium at the front of the room and looked at Lin Yan with disgust.

"Sit down. If you have any questions, you can talk to me after class. This teacher is old and can't keep up with your young people's games."

The rustling whisper in the class turned into a roar of laughter. Lin Yan blushed and shuffled all the way to the front to retrieve the textbook. He bowed to his teacher and returned back to his seat.

He was terrified that the ghost would try something else for most of the night. It had gotten harder to keep his eyes open just as dawn broke. It was hard staying awake during his morning class but he didn't expect his half-asleep daze to cause him this kind of embarrassment.

His face was still burning.

Just as he was thinking about it, his phone screen suddenly turned on, and a text message popped up. Yin Zhou sent: "Was everything alright last night?"

Lin Yan settled down and quickly sent a reply: "I'm still alive. I should be fine before July 15th." Fingers snapped and moved across the keyboard: "I found something new on a supernatural forum. Meet me at the entrance of the cafeteria at noon so we can talk."

On the first day of the month of Wushen, the fifteenth day of the seventh month, was the day of the Ghost Festival, and the gate of ghosts is wide open.

Lin Yan shrugged his shoulders and lay on the table, scribbling on the notebook while thinking. Unconsciously, he had covered a whole piece of paper with the rebirth curse. He hadn't done anything, so why is this ghost doing all of this? Lin Yan poked the paper bitterly with his pen, making small holes.

At the end of his two classes, when it was time for lunch, Lin Yan rushed to the cafeteria after packing up his things haphazardly. He went out and, when he turned to the left, he roughly bumped into another person. His nose slammed into their forehead and he almost cried out loud.

He should have checked his horoscope before going outside today.

Lin Yan held his nose and hissed and sucked in cold air. The other man stood silently. When Lin Yan opened his eyes and looked at the person he hit, he was surprised to see that he had run into a Daoist priest.

He was short and thin, his skin pale and he appeared weak. He was wearing some weird Tibetan blue homemade clothes. His shoulders were hunched under the weight of his backpack. This person seemed so dull that people couldn't help but yawn just glancing at him.

"Sorry, I was rushing to the cafeteria and didn't see you," Lin Yan apologized embarrassedly. The man didn't seem to be listening to him at all. His gaze was focused on something over Lin Yan's shoulder. He stared at it and suddenly grinned.

"Such powerful Yin energy. You need to be careful."

After speaking, he let out a soft "ah" as if he had just woken up from sleepwalking, and lightly floated past Lin Yan.

"Is that guy rambling delusions again?" The boy following Lin Yan poked his arm and said in disbelief.

Lin Yan shook his head and rushed down the stairs with his bag.

It was raining lightly, and the whole campus was wet. The students who were going to eat held umbrellas over their heads, looking like large colourful mushrooms from a distance. Lin Yan stepped onto a small paved road to avoid stepping in a puddle. Looking around, he saw Yin Zhou, who was looking around like a stupid bird at the entrance of the cafeteria. He looked terrible. He was holding a large red umbrella, four characters seemingly hanging on his forehead that was advertising his current mood: Stay away from me.

People who passed by couldn't help but glance over at him.

Lin Yan strode over the accumulating water under the steps in two quick strides, and patted Yin Zhou on the shoulder: "Why do you look as bad as I do?"

Yin Zhou was a little out of it, and took a long time to look at Lin Yan: "Second Immortal Gu is dead."

"My mother just called and asked us to the police station."

Lin Yan's face dropped.

When the police offer on duty led Lin Yan and Yin Zhou into the morgue and removed the white cloth that covered Second Immortal Gu’s face, Lin Yan took two steps backwards in shock. Yin Zhou couldn’t stop gagging. The face was extremely distorted. Her eyes were cracked open, the eyeballs almost bursting out of the eye sockets. Her mouth was wide open like a black hole, and her face looked like it was covered with nail scratches. It seemed that she had witnessed something extremely terrifying before she died. The most disgusting thing was that the skin all the way from her face to her neck was covered with deep holes. She had been eaten at by insects and ants. It is only by the contours of her face that they could barely recognize her as the grandmother who pretended to be a ghost in front of them yesterday.

Lin Yan covered his mouth and tried his best to suppress the urge to vomit. He waved his hand vigorously to let the police know to put down the white sheet.

"This is the person?"

Lin Yan nodded and took a few steps back unconsciously.

"She died last night. The bug bites are still under investigation." The policeman said casually, and glanced at Lin Yan's expressions disdainfully: "Are you two okay? We are all used to seeing dead people. It's better to think about where they're going."

Lin Yan and Yin Zhou, as the last two customers of Second Immortal Gu, were asked to stay at the police station to assist in the investigation. The interrogators took them to record their statements and fill out some forms. The police officer shuttled back and forth between the two interrogation rooms with the folders. As he walked, he muttered: "College students still believe this. I've heard so many crazy things over the years."

At 3 pm, the autopsy report from the hospital was sent to the police station. Second Immortal Gu died of a heart attack, which was a normal death. The blood contains a lot of catecholamines, the myocardial cells are damaged, mixed with erythema; it was a common way to die for patients with cardiovascular diseases. There were many insects in the countryside, and they gnawed away at the corpse overnight.

Lin Yan and Yin Zhou were taken out of the interrogation room, and each concluded the case by leaving their fingerprints for the file. The policeman on duty sent the two out. Seeing that the superior was not there, they shook their heads and muttered to Lin Yan: "The report said that they were strongly affected. To put it bluntly, they were scared to death. When I was a child, I heard the villagers say that these sorts of people never died a peaceful death, and dealing with ghosts and gods would damage their morality and sucks away at their life to the point that it kills them."

When they left the police station, the pattering rain was still falling, and there were few people on the street. Lin Yan's face turned blue and he couldn't stop shaking from head to toe. When he passed by the convenience store, he bought a pack of cigarettes and sat side by side with Yin Zhou on the road. The body of Second Immortal Gu lingered in front of his eyes. Lin Yan wiped the rain off his face, his lips shaking as he asked, "Do you think. . . that thing did it?"

Yin Zhou was silent. "He came again last night, he seemed very angry." Lin Yan buried his face in his hands. "We shouldn't have gone to see her yesterday."

"You saw how she looked just now. That thing isn't human."

As he raised his head and looked around, his voice suddenly rose: "just because no one can see it, it thinks it can just kill anyone it wants to? That's a human being; a living, breathing person. No matter what I do, you always fucking leave regardless of what I say. You're coming after me and yet you take revenge on others?!"

Insane, perverted, totally unreasonable. Lin Yan said mutely, "Ghosts were human once too. Did you even have a conscience when you were alive?! Why don't you come out? Brother, I’m waiting to die, it would be very kind of you to come here now. Why wait for July 15th? Let's end this!"

On all the roads of all the towns and villages, the faces behind every window have remained unknown to the general population. No one knew that in a village in the northwest corner of the city, a grandmother had been robbed of her life. She died inexplicably. To many, it was as unnoticeable as stepping on an ant. A ghost did it! Who would believe that? Lin Yan recalled his experience last night. He thought that that gentle kiss would at least show that the monster still had some trace of his conscience from when he was a human being. It even sympathized with his paranoia, but now? Second Immortal Gu couldn't see his existence at all, what did she do wrong? Lin Yan shouted desperately in his heart, what did I do wrong!

"The next one could be me, my parents, or you. . ." Lin Yan squeezed the cigarette out, a vicious expression in his eyes: "I wanted to make peace with it, but now I changed my mind."

"He can come and try to take my life. I'll kill him first; a life for a life!"

#dig a grave to dig out a ghost #dig a grave to dig out a ghost translation #chinese bl #chinese novel #english translation #yaoi novel

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duchessfics · 4 years

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Midnight Disclosure

(https://friendly-deatheater.tumblr.com/post/152731371953)

(https://alainashuffman.tumblr.com/post/66522632737/sarah-paulson-in-piggy-piggy)

Billie x Fem!Reader x Audrey

Requested by Anon: hi! i was wondering if you could you write some fluff for billie x reader x audrey? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 i’ve gotta a lot of tough stuff going on and on top of that the world is going crazy, so my mental health isn’t doing very well. maybe r feels like a burden and doesn’t really talk about her mental health or problems because she doesn’t want to bother anyone so she avoids billie and audrey. you are one of my absolute favorite blogs!! take as long as ya need writing this!! ☺️💕

Warning(s): Mentions of anxiety and depression, description of a panic attack, Mentions of Covid-19

Summary: On the eve of current world events, the reader is overwhelmed but doesn’t want to bother her girlfriends with personal struggles. However the truth eventually emerges and they offer support in a way that she hasn’t experienced.

Word Count: 4347

A/n: Tbh, I’m a little nervous to publish this just because I know Covid-19 is everywhere at the moment and it’s frightening. But I thought this could help with those of us who may feel overwhelmed or are struggling to fight inner demons. I am fortunate enough that even though I’m currently laid off from work I am in a relatively stable environment. And my heart goes out to everyone who is struggling right now.

With the time I have now I’m trying to write more and publish some content where if nothing else you can get an escape for a couple minutes. I’ll also be reposting others’ works too. If you are struggling know that I care about you and am willing to listen even if you just want to be anonymous. Wherever you are in the world I’m sending positive thoughts/vibes/prayers your way. 💖

“Y/n, darling!” Billie calls out from the kitchen.

In response you get up from your spot on the couch and walk over to where she is. When you enter the luxurious kitchen, the medium gives you her million dollar smile and curls her finger in a beckoning motion, showing off her fresh set of acrylic nails—cherry red of course.

You smile back, cheeks warming as you come within close proximity. Then she leans in and pecks your lips before asking you, “Were you busy, sweetheart?” You shake your head and ask, “Why?” Billie takes a step back and picks up a slip of paper off of the countertop while replying, “I wanted to ask if you could run out and buy a couple things we need?”

You take the list from her and scan over the items before returning your gaze to her chocolate brown eyes and asking, “Is Audrey around to come with me?” The blonde gives you a sympathetic smile and lifts one of her hands to cup your face before she answers, “She’s rehearsing her lines for the next couple days of work. And I have a conference call with a couple of producers in ten minutes.”

You look down and nod in understanding, but feel bummed that you’ll be going alone. However Billie uses her hand to guide you to look at her before soothing, “When you get home, Audrey and I will give you something special. Ok?”

The way she smirks at you makes your ears burn and a small giggle slips out of you before you reply, “Ok.” Her hand falls away from you and she gives you another brief kiss, letting her plump lips press against yours a little longer than before. Then Billie says with a wink, “I’ll see you later, babygirl.”

You tell her goodbye and gather your purse and keys before walking out to the multiple car garage. Then you climb into Billie’s “old” sports car. In reality, the car isn’t that old, but she bought a new one and has basically given you this one. You climb in, turning the car on with a low growl and speed off to one of the local grocery stores…

You assumed this would be an easy in and out task, however as you pull into the parking lot it is jammed packed and you struggle to find an available parking spot.

Maybe...there’s a really good sale? But you have never seen the supermarket this busy.

Finally you find a space to pull into and step out of the car, list in hand. While walking towards the entrance, people pass by and have their shopping carts filled to the brim with cleaning items, toilet paper, canned goods, and water. Beyond the stuffed shopping carts, you also notice that each person’s facial expression is tainted with worry.

In the midst of looking around, you nearly get run over by someone pushing their cart towards you. Luckily you back up out of the way with a gasp as they say on the phone, “They’re running out of everything. I’ve never seen so many empty shelves. You better come here soon or it will all be gone.”

Without you consciously realizing it, your heart rate has increased and you take shallow breaths. But you look to the ground, trying not to notice the numerous other people around you.

You can do this. You only need three things: eggs, milk, and a bottle of Audrey’s favorite brand of fruit juice. No big deal.

But when you enter the bustling building, a small whimper escapes your throat when you see the massive line of people checking out. Each cart is packed with items and the employees rush around trying to appease the masses.

You don’t realize you’re frozen in place until someone brushes past you, letting out an annoyed huff.

Maybe you should get more? You could call Billie—except she’s in a conference call. Should you call Audrey? She’s working too. You can just grab a couple extra things. Deep breaths. You can do this.

You grab a shopping cart and wipe the handle with a sanitizing wipe before beginning to navigate through the packed aisles to pick up the items…

By the time you return to the car, your breath is stuck in your throat and your eyes smart with tears. You manage to unload the grocery bags of items into the car’s trunk before you get into the car and break down into tears.

Yes you bought the three items. But in your panicked state you also filled your cart like everyone else. And you weren’t fast enough to even get any toilet paper or sanitizer. Why do you always fail when it’s most important to perform well?

Your hands shake in fear and you know you just spent much more than you intended, but you’re so scared. Everyone is rushing around and things are flying off of the shelves so you panicked. As you cry and gasp for air, the thought crosses your mind to call your girlfriends.

But they’ve never seen you like this. And you don’t want to bring them down. They’re so busy right now. You don’t want to burden them with your irrational thoughts. So you do your best to pull yourself together on the drive home.

When you pull into the garage and turn the car off, you make yourself take a couple deep breaths, collecting your emotions enough to get past them. For now you only pick up the three items you were sent out for and leave the rest to bring in when they’re gone. You were out for at least an hour, but hopefully they won’t notice.

You walk in to see Audrey pacing the length of the kitchen while listening to someone on her phone. She huffs and crosses her one arm over her chest, not giving you more than a stiff smile and honestly, you’re grateful.

You slip off your shoes while she scoffs before arguing, “I don’t see why we are considering not filming at this point. I have been thoroughly rehearsing this role and have plenty of auditions and other projects after this.”

Meanwhile you hear the news playing in the background from the living room.

As she keeps pacing, you quickly put the items in the fridge, listening to her continue, “We’re already behind on production. If we don’t keep going now this will be a complete loss for everyone involved. Yes, I’m sure that I would take that risk to finish filming.” You silently leave the room and peek your head into the living room where Billie stands with her back to you smoking a cigarette while watching the news.

Before you can get any more anxious, you clear your throat and softly murmur, “I-I got everything on the list. I’m just going to lie down and rest for a bit.” She lets out a puff of smoke before partially turning towards you, but her eyes remain on the TV as she mindlessly replies, “Alright, thank you, sweetheart.” By the time you finish mumbling, “You’re welcome.” she’s back to watching the news. So you back into the hallway, your shoulders sagging as you hear Audrey’s frustrated words and the news.

Once you make it to the bedroom, you shut the door behind you and make a beeline for the bed. Then you flop back on it, letting out a sigh.

However, you shoot back up and mutter, “Shit.”

How could you be so stupid?

You rush over to the bathroom and turn on the sink tap, wetting your hands before scrubbing them with soap. After humming happy birthday to yourself two times you rinse your hands and dry them off, just finishing when your phone rings.

As you walk back to the bedroom, you pull your phone out of your pocket to see it’s your sister. So you press the answer button, sitting on the edge of the bed as you say, “Hello?”

She greets you before asking, “Have you been watching the news? They’re saying the coronavirus is spreading especially quick in LA.” You let out a sigh, trying not to panic again as you answer, “Yeah. Things are pretty chaotic, but I just went grocery shopping so we should be good.”

In response she warns, “Just be extra careful. This whole thing is getting worse and worse. Try not to go out.” You assure her you won’t and tell her you love her before saying goodbye. Then you fall back against the bed and snuggle under the covers.

Maybe a nap will help you.

But just as you get into the foggy daze of sleep, your phone dings. So with a groan of annoyance you pull out your phone to see your mom texted you,

Did your sister call?

You quickly reply, Yeah. Then you toss your phone out of arm’s reach before burrowing back under the covers.

However, your phone dings again, interrupting your quiet time. Maybe if you ignore her you can just text later. But after hearing 5 more dings, you toss the covers back with a groan and pick up your phone. That’s when you see your mom has texted you five times.

She’s really concerned about you in LA.

I don’t know if you’ve been watching the news, but this is all they’ve been talking about. Everyone’s saying they’ve never seen a global pandemic like this.

And LA is one of the hot spots. Did you go out and get essentials? Think through what you’ll need for the next couple weeks and go fast. It may all be gone soon and who knows how long it will be sold out.

Also try to do some things even when self-isolating. We all know how you get in situations like this.

Are you reading any of this?

Your eyes well up at that last text. Maybe you are just a burden to the people around you.

Before she decides to call, you sniff and swipe away the tears that threaten to fall before texting back,

Yeah. I got stuff today.

As soon as you send it, the message says read and three dots show up on the screen. Your stomach clenches with nerves as they continue to bounce. You are positive that she’s going to send you a long message and sure enough a wall of text appears:

Don’t let yourself sleep these days away. Spend time cleaning the house. Exercise. Read that book I sent you. Don’t spend all day on your phone. That’s a complete waste of time. Don’t stay up late at night. Eat healthy, keep a regular schedule. Do some knitting. Spend time cooking. Go outside. This is not a time to stay in your pajamas and watch TV all day. Don’t fall into bad habits because of a lack of self awareness and self discipline. If you do this time will be incredibly disappointing and wasted. These are just a couple small things. I love you and only want what’s best for you.

By now you feel that earlier heaviness resettling on your chest and the pressure of her words just feel like too much right now. So you turn your phone off and set it aside before sliding under the covers and succumbing to the darkness…

At some point you must fall asleep, because you’re awakened by a soft, British voice saying, “Y/n, darling. Are you awake?” You shift under the blankets and they get slowly drawn back to reveal Audrey smiling down at you as she comments, “I don’t know how you fall asleep with all of those covers pulled over you. You’re like a little mole.”

Your eyes squint as they adjust to the light and you shrug your shoulders, still feeling quite drowsy. But her face gets serious and her eyes narrow before she asks, “Is something wrong? You look upset.”

Your heart clenches as you realize how your eyes probably look puffy and irritated. Luckily, you come up with a quick excuse, saying, “It’s just my allergies. They flared up for some reason.”

Her disposition goes back to normal and she nods in understanding, making you inwardly let out a sigh of relief. Then she says, “Well, I came in here to tell you that dinner is almost ready.” So you assure her you’ll be out in a few minutes and freshen up before joining your girlfriends at the dinner table.

As the three of you eat, Billie says, “I was talking to my producers and it looks like we’ll have to delay filming after this trip.” You feel guilty for being relieved, but can’t contain the small smile that forms on your face when the medium looks at you. She smirks back and purrs, “I wonder whatever I will do with all of the free time after that?” Your cheeks heat up at her insinuation and she gives you a wink, leading you to look down to hide your grin.

However, the moment is broken by Audrey stating, “Well I still plan to travel and film. This whole thing is ridiculous.”

Your smile fades at her words and Billie looks to the actress before teasing, “Awe come on, Audrey. Don’t you want to spend time with y/n and I?” But Audrey scoffs and sternly replies, “I have worked my ass off for this role. So unless everything shuts down, I will be traveling to finish filming.”

Your eyes widen at her determination, but you keep quiet, looking down to your food. On the other hand, Billie doesn’t seem fazed, assuring her, “I’m sure it will all be fine, darling.” before she picks up her glass and finishes off her wine.

You try to finish your plate of food, but the anxiety you feel makes your stomach unsettled. All of this turmoil makes you feel like your anxious thoughts are eating you from the inside out. But you don’t say anything. Why trouble them when they have enough on their plate?

The rest of the evening goes by in a blur of watching TV and even though you sit next to your girlfriends, your mind is miles away stuck in a loop of anxiety about your girlfriends, your family, your friends, and even the world. These fears continue to run through your head and get bigger to the point that even though you lie in bed you can’t fall asleep.

The faint sound of Billie and Audrey’s even breaths is soothing and you’re happy to see them both fast asleep with peaceful expressions. Normally you don’t catch them sleeping, but whenever you do they both always look so beautiful.

Just being able to watch both women makes your heart feel like it’s going to burst. You love them so much.

The way Billie flirts and compliments you all of the time especially when you’re down on yourself. Or how she showers you with gifts and will always hold you close.

And Audrey. Sweet Audrey is always there to cheer you up and notices anytime you don’t seem to be doing well. She even did today. And if you ever question how essential you are to this relationship; she’ll immediately share how essential you are to them. If something happened to either of them in all of this—

That’s when you come back to reality and feel the tears streaming down your cheeks. Before you can get loud enough to wake them you slip out of bed and leave the bedroom. The first place you walk to is the kitchen where you get a glass of water, sniffling through your tears.

Then you step over to the living room and take a seat on the couch, quickly finishing off the water before setting down the glass. While you feel anxious enough to stay awake, your body is also worn down from the panicked state you have been in all day. So you play a game on your phone. The minimal strategy is enough to distract you and as you begin to feel your stress and anxiety fading you hear from behind you, “What are you doing out here little mouse?”

Even though you recognize Billie’s voice, you still gasp and whip your head around to see her standing in the doorway with slightly mussed hair. But she still looks breathtaking.

You look down and shake your head while muttering, “Nothing.”

That makes her brows furrow and she comes closer as she replies, “It doesn’t seem like nothing, babygirl.” Then walks around the back of the couch to sit beside you. At first you turn to look away, but Billie softly says, “Hey,” then she brings her hands up to cup your face before guiding you to look directly at her. However, her brows are slightly furrowed when she asks, “Have you been crying?”

While she keeps your head from turning away, you can’t keep eye contact as you reply, “I-It’s stupid. I’m just being dumb.” The medium gently shushes you, skimming the pads of her thumbs along your cheek while murmuring, “Whatever is bothering you isn’t stupid, y/n. And you aren’t dumb. Please tell me what’s bothering you, darling. You can tell me anything.”

While your mind scolds you for being weak right now and screams that she doesn’t really care, your exterior cracks and, after swallowing enough to feel like you can speak, you barely whisper, “I’m scared.”

Billie scoots closer, still keeping your face cradled in her smooth hands as she asks in a voice still husky with sleepiness, “Oh, honey. Did Audrey or I do something to upset you?”

Right away you shake your head and reply, “No, never. It’s just…when I went to the grocery store today it was packed with people rushing around and grabbing things.”

Then you take a deep breath before shakily continuing, “All anyone could talk about was the coronavirus. A-And I saw store employees being yelled at by multiple people. And when I was in the cleaning section there was this elderly woman looking for toilet paper—”

Your voice catches and you get teary-eyed as you whimper, “A-And the shelf was completely empty. P-People were pushing and shoving and she was just trying to pass. She looked so defeated and it—it broke my heart. That’s someone’s grandma and if someone did that to my grandma I would be so upset.”

You begin to shed tears as you continue, “Then when I got home, my sister and mother both contacted me about the coronavirus saying what I should do. Even though they were trying to be helpful I-I got overwhelmed. And just watching the news while knowing you and Audrey are traveling—”

You let out a choked sob before rasping, “I’m just so scared, Billie.”

While you can’t see her face due to your blurred tears, the medium brings her hands away from your face to gather you close to her while murmuring, “Oh, sweetheart.” In response to her warm hug, you wrap your arms around her and cry into her shoulder. Then you say between gasps, “I-I told you I’m being dumb.”

Billie strokes one hand up and down your back in a slow motion, softly shushing you while soothing, “You’re not being dumb, y/n. These are scary times. And I’m sorry we never asked about the grocery store or how you were feeling.”

After a while, you feel yourself begin to settle and merely let out soft hiccups whilst nuzzling into the bend of her neck. Her smooth, soft hair gently caresses your forehead and cheeks and she keeps quiet besides softly shushing you, holding you close to her.

You feel spent as you mumble, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for all of that to come out.”

Billie guides you to look at her and wipes away the stray tears on your sensitive, puffy cheeks as she murmurs, “You have no reason to be sorry, y/n. I sometimes forget what a kind, tender heart you have. You care about others around you so much it’s no wonder everything feels overwhelming right now. But that’s nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about.”

Normally people would call you a “worry wart” or just tell you to stop being anxious, but you’ve never been told that it’s due to caring about others. You do care. And being anxious doesn’t have to be bad or make you a bad person. It just took someone rephrasing what you have been feeling in a way your own brain wouldn’t allow.

You’re not the problem.

You give Billie a wobbly smile and whisper, “Thank you, Billie.” She smiles back and leans towards you, running her nose against yours as she replies, “You’re welcome, babygirl.”

You keep quiet for a moment, feeling better. However, you straighten up and while you wish this wasn’t nagging at you, you need to know. So, you ask, “Will Audrey really still travel? Or you? It seems so dangerous to travel at the moment and I don’t really want to be left alone—”

Your girlfriend silences your worries with a soft kiss before soothing, “It’s ok, y/n. All of my travel ended up getting postponed. So, I’ll be home with you the whole time.”

That confirmation leads you to let out a breath of relief and you nod. Then Billie loosens her hold on you and suggests, “You should tell Audrey how you feel.”

Her idea makes you stiffen up and you look down to the lacy hem of Billie’s baby doll nightgown as you reply, “I don’t know…she talked about working so hard for this role and I don’t want to be the selfish girlfriend and take that away from her.”

The medium chuckles, making you look to her face and she says with a smile,

“Now y/n, you know how dramatic Audrey can be at times. I know without a doubt if you told her how you feel she would reconsider. And, if nothing else, she wants to hear from you, honey.”

She has a point. You bite your lip, pondering her words for a moment before slowly relenting, “I guess I could say something to her…”

Billie’s grin grows and she gives your cheek a small pinch before assuring, “I know you can do it. And I’ll be with you the whole time.” So, you return to your bedroom, holding Billie’s hand the whole time, and when you step into the darkened room, you see Audrey nestled under the covers breathing deeply.

Billie leads you over to the side of the bed the actress is closest to. Then, with one encouraging nod, she releases your hand and you slowly climb up onto the bed. Once you’re on, you place a hand on the her shoulder, gently nudging her while whispering, “Audrey?”

She shifts in her sleep and turns to face you, opening her bleary eyes while she drowsily slurs, “Yes, darling?”

As soon as she shows any semblance of being awake you wrap your arms around her middle and pull her close to you, making her squeak in shock as you begin to plead,

“Please don’t leave LA, Audrey! Please! I know you worked hard to get this role, but I don’t want you to get sick or be separated from me and Billie. Just please stay home. I know I’m being selfish, but I love you both so much and don’t want anything to happen to you. I’ll do anything you want to get you to stay home. Anything—”

While her senses are still fogged over from sleep, she lets out a low chuckle, hugging you back before she croakily soothes, “Hey, hey it’s ok, sweetheart.” making you stop your pleas.

Then she pulls back to see your face when she asks, “You love us?” That’s when you register that you said those words.

While you haven’t said those words out loud before, you don’t regret saying them.

You nod, your cheeks warming as you look to her and shyly answer, “Yes. I-I love you, Audrey.” Then you look to Billie who still stands beside you both and say, “I love you too, Billie.”

Both women smile and Billie murmurs, “We love you too, y/n.” Then Audrey presses a kiss to the corner of your lips before huskily purring, “We both love you so much, darling girl.” You sheepishly smile and turn to face her again, sharing a brief kiss on the lips.

Then she looks to you and apologizes, “I didn’t mean to frighten you earlier. While we’ll be tying up a couple loose ends the next couple days, it looks like any further production has been delayed. So I’ll be here. Ok?” While you feel bad, knowing how much Audrey loves acting, you can’t help but feel relieved. You nod and reply, “Ok.”

Billie starts to join you both on the bed, so you shift to let her have room. However, she takes your wrist and teases, “And just where do you think you’re going, babygirl?”

You look to her smoldering gaze and slowly answer, “My side?” The medium chuckles and murmurs, “Oh no, that just won’t do. You can stay in the middle so both of us can love on you.” Her sultry tone makes you blush, and you nod at her instructions, staying put while both women move to keep you in between them.

Once you’re settled, Audrey spoons you from behind and Billie snuggles into your front. For the first time today, you feel the weight completely lift off of your chest and within minutes your eyes begin to get droopy.

Billie tucks your hair out of the way while soothing, “If you start to feel anxious again, you can always come to either of us.” Then Audrey kisses just behind your ear and murmurs, “Whatever happens we’ll get through this together, love.” You relax into their arms and nod, sleepily saying, “Thank you.” And even though you still have feelings of being worried and depressed, you begin to sense a pinprick of hope in the midst of the tumultuous unknown.

Tagged @marilynroselleprentiss @saviorinsilk @chokemepaulson @versonstar @find-me-a-constellation @cordwliagoode @psychobitchtess @midnight-lestrange @mysweetdelia @venablesbitch @peachesandlesbians

Let me know if you would like to be tagged in later works!

Please remember: you matter, you’re important, and you add beauty to the world. Sending love. 💖

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useless-slytherclaw · 4 years

Link

Relationships: Cobra | Erik/Midnight (implied)

"Those guys aren’t going to leave your friend over there alone forever. He’s too pretty.”

_________________

It’s been almost a week since the Oracion Seis were tossed into the Magic Council’s high-security prison. Cobra was sitting alone in the mess hall, eyes darting around. Racer was sitting against the wall by the door. Hoteye was having lunch with a group of other prisoners. Midnight was sitting alone at a table and staring blankly at the space above his food. Cobra’s eyes moved to the groups of men watching Midnight with predatory grazes. They’ve been getting bolder by the day.

“Hello, Cobra.” A voice came from his left and he snapped his head around to look. A slender man with long blonde hair and glasses was standing there. Entirely uninvited, he took a seat next to Cobra. He spoke in a confidential tone, “I know you guys are the Oracion Seis. Not many people know, but it’ll get out eventually.”

Cobra waited for a long moment, trying to decide how to handle this. There was no point in denying who he was, he’d already responded to his name. “Why are you talking to me?”

The man smiled and pushed his glasses up his nose. “People were pretty scared when you guys showed up. It was quite a show. A whole unit of Rune Knights to sign you in. Guards are clearly scared of you. All four of you shackled with double anti-magic lacrima. There are only two or three other guys in here with those double shackles. But that fear won’t last forever.”

“You’re telling me things I already know,” Cobra gritted out. He kept glancing around the room. It was horrible not being able to hear what was going on around him.

“Those guys aren’t going to leave your friend over there alone forever. He’s too pretty.”

“Disgusting,” Cobra said. The guy sitting across from him shrugged.

“You guys aren’t allowed to talk to each other, right? It’s a pretty standard punishment for dark guild members. I could pass messages for you.”

“What do you get out of this?” Cobra asked. He didn’t feel like playing word games with this guy, whoever he was.

“Protection.” The man said simply. “I get by avoiding fights. But, if one of the big guys change their mind, I’m in trouble.”

“Why don’t you suck up to them,” Cobra asked, gritting his teeth. Across the room, a pair of big, tattooed men were moving closer to Midnight.

“Those two,” the man looked at the same place Cobra did. “Don’t have two brain cells between them. Most of the others either. Hard to make a bargain with people like that.”

Cobra snorted; he’d already figured that out. His eyes were locked on the two men walking closer to Midnight. He knew M could defend himself, but he still felt anxiety twisting his stomach.

“They’re making their move today.” The blond man said. He propped his head on his hand. “I heard them talking about it. You have plenty of time to get over there.”

“Tch, M can take care of himself,” Cobra said. He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms: a picture of disinterest.

“He doesn’t have any magic.”

“I hadn’t noticed,” Cobra said dryly clacking his shackles together. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that Racer had moved to a table closer to Midnight. Hoteye had quieted his conversation as well. The two men approaching Midnight didn’t seem to realize that they had an audience. Or maybe they didn’t care; foolish of them, really.

“What’s a pretty thing like you doing in here,” the bigger man said leaning over the table opposite where Midnight sat.

“The same thing as you, I expect.” Midnight said, but he didn’t look up from the table.

“Oh, and what’s that?”

Midnight crossed his arms, specialized shackles clanking. He looked up, red eyes dancing and a signature smirk on his face. “Being in a dark guild, thievery, murder, mass murder, attempting to incite a war.”

The man laughed and leaned further forward. “I bet you’re not so hot without your magic,” the man nodded his head towards Midnight’s hand.

“You look pretty worried,” Cobra’s unwanted table companion added. “You could go help him”

“I said,” Cobra gritted his teeth, “that M can take care of himself.” He wanted to snap that he wasn’t worried about Midnight because he wasn’t supposed to be worried, but he’d only give himself away.

The whole mess hall had gone silent. The guards were relaxing against the wall, though, clearly not interested in intervening. The man lifted one hand and moved to grab Midnight by the chin, but his hand never made its mark. Midnight’s lazy body posture didn’t change, but his arm moved with blurring speed; He blocked and then slammed the man's arm into the table hard enough that Cobra was surprised he didn’t hear bones crack.

“Don’t touch me,” Midnight said, getting lazily to his feet. Cobra was grinning now, shoving down his anxiety.

“Little brat,” the man spat. His friend, who had been standing behind Midnight lunged forward and missed as Midnight slid his left foot and turned away from the blow. The man caught himself and turned to square up to Midnight, who looked bored with the entire situation even though the man loomed over him. Midnight reacted as the man threw a heavy punch. Lightning fast, he shifted and leaned so the fist flew right past his unimpressed face. The man overbalanced as his punch went wild. Stepping forward, Midnight used his elbow on the man’s spine to help him fall forward. Before the man could try to stand up, Midnight put his boot on the man’s neck and then his face.

With his boot on the downed man’s face, Midnight turned towards the man who’d done the talking. He gave one of his sadistic grins as he leaned his weight on the man’s face. “You’re hardly worth my time.”

The man who’d done most of the talking was looking from his companion on the ground to Midnight with something between confusion and fear on his face. Midnight walked towards him, and the man raised his hands in surrender. Midnight tossed his braid over his shoulder with one hand. But as he strolled past the man, he attacked. Despite the speed of his motion, it somehow still looked lazy. The man screamed and raised his hand to his face, blood dripping between his fingers.

“I like the taste of your pain,” Midnight said with a small laugh, his tongue sticking out of the edge of his mouth in an entirely mad expression. “Remember that.”

He walked calmly to the door as several of the man’s companions rushed to help him. Midnight gave a small smile to Racer as he passed him. Racer gave him a nod.

“I’d like to go back to my cell now,” Midnight said to the guard looking entirely calm and sane again. He raised his hands up so they could close the shackles tighter while they transferred him. Midnight looked over at Cobra and winked before the guards lead him out of the rooms.

“I told you that he could take care of himself,” Cobra said to his table companion.

Cobra and Racer looked at each other, at Hoteye, then at the pair of men who’d harassed Midnight. Hoteye shook his head, but Racer and Cobra smiled.

The two prisoners were found dead in the bathrooms two nights later.

#ftguildevents #midco #midnight #midnight fairy tail #cobra #erik #racer #hoteye #the oracion seis #fanfic #ao3 #Oracion Seis sticking together #Midnight can fuck you up without magic yo #rarepair

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fontasticcrablettes · 4 years

Text

Merry Christmas @whitnium! Here’s a Secret Santa gift for you, full of flystelle for your soul :)

Flynn felt like a wind-up toy worn down when he collapsed into a chair in the Aurnion inn. Just standing long enough to pry his armour off had been exhausting. It now lay in a heap at his feet as he slumped into the chair.

“You look beat.” Yuri lay on one of the beds, which he had fallen onto without even taking his boots off.

“You’re one to talk.”

Yuri folded his arms and closed his eyes. “Guess it’s been a busy day, huh?”

“A busy day….” The busy part was indisputable, but he had trouble believing it had only been one day since they set out for Tarqaron. In that one day, the world had changed so much. They’d faced Duke and the Adephagos only a few hours ago, and had arrived victorious at the gates of Aurnion less than twenty minutes ago. Tomorrow, Flynn would have a meeting with Ioder and Harry to discuss all that had happened and still needed to be done, but for now, he had blessed peace.

The door to the inn opened and Raven stepped in. Flynn instinctively straightened up in the presence of Captain Schwann.

“Hey, do either of ya know where Estelle wandered off ta? Rita was wonderin’.”

Flynn straightened up even more. “Lady Estellise is missing?”

“She went for a walk,” Yuri said without opening his eyes. “She told me just after we got back that she wanted to clear her head.”

“I think I could use a clear head myself,” Raven said. “I’ll let Rita know.”

When he was gone, Flynn said, “Do you know what direction she wandered off in?”

“Away from the gate. Toward the river, I think.” Yuri opened his eyes and turned his head. “Why? You worried about her?”

“No.” He tried to make himself comfortable again, but couldn’t relax. “I’m sure she’s fine. It’s just… well, she was worn out from how much healing she’d been doing. We’re all exhausted, and I know she’s been troubled about the Adephagos and her unfortunate role in it….”

Yuri closed his eyes again. “If you’re that worried, go find her. And maybe kiss her while you’re at it so I don’t have to deal with your emotional constipation anymore.”

The last traces of energy he hadn’t known he had flared to life in a spike of anxiety. “I – my what? I don’t – why would you – I don’t have a crush on Lady Estellise!”

“Uh-huh, that sounds exactly like what someone who doesn’t have a crush would say. Just go see her and let me sleep, will you?”

Flynn dragged himself out of the chair. “I’m going to go make sure she is alright. It has nothing to do with… with anything else you said.”

Flynn huffed out of the inn. It was almost midnight, and the clothes that had been under armour all day were sweaty, making him more cold than the light breeze ought to. At least, he liked to think it was the breeze giving him goosebumps and making him anxious.

Yuri was stupid. He was just pulling stuff out of his ass. There was absolutely no way that… that… that Yuri could know how Flynn felt when he’d pointedly never brought it up. Maybe Yuri had just noticed how amazing Estelle was and assumed that it was only natural that Flynn had feelings for her, because Flynn found it hard to believe that everyone else who had ever met Estelle didn’t also fall in love with her. In fact, Flynn had spent the past few months terrified of the prospect that Yuri had also developed feelings for her, and the way Yuri had carelessly sent him off reassured a lengthy fear.

Then Flynn reached the main gate of Aurnion, and his anxiety came crashing back. Estelle was not down by the river or even walking along the inside of the wall. She had decided to leave Aurnion all together, and was standing in the grass beyond the town with her gaze fixed on the sky.

Then she startled and drew her sword. A monster, low to the ground and covered in plated armour, crept through the grass toward her.

“Estellise!” Flynn found hidden reserved of energy accessible only by panic to sprint across the field toward her. He was too tired to think clearly. Any thoughts about her having fought hundreds of monsters before flew out of his mind and the fact that she had held her own in a fight against Duke only hours ago didn’t seem to matter. He just had the sudden terror of watching her get mauled to death just when he thought all was well, and it drove him to charge forward.

He slammed his sword into the Erdas’ side, taking it by surprise. It hissed and jerked around, slashing at him with a clawed arm. Flynn was so used to wearing armour that he didn’t even try to evade the slash in the half a second he had to react, and pain ripped through his left arm.

The monster was on its last legs though. Estelle had already injured it and his surprise attack had struck deep into his chest. It only took one more thrust of his sword to make it collapse to the ground.

Panting, Flynn held his hand over his bloody forearm and tried to summon the aer to cast First Aid. When nothing came, he felt like he’d missed the top step in a dark staircase. Of course – they’d gotten rid of blastia only hours ago.

“Flynn!” Estelle grabbed his arm and held her own hand over it. Light flashed and the familiar tingle of magical healing rushed through his arm. The wound closed, though he pulled it away from her to clutch the still-aching arm to his torso.

“Are you alright, Lady Estellise?”

She stared at him and then began to laugh. “Me? Of course I am! You’re ok though, right? I healed your arm ok? Did you get hurt anywhere else?”

“I’m perfectly fine. Please don’t worry about me; I came to help you. What are you doing out here, anyway? It’s dangerous to be outside the walls at night.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. I just… wanted to look at the sky.” She turned to resume gazing up at the black expanse and its thousands of twinkling stars. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

Flynn watched the moonlight gleam in her dreamy eyes and couldn’t help smiling. “Yes. It is.”

“For a while, I’ve avoided looking at the sky. Every time I glanced up, the Adephagos was there, waiting. It’s finally gone now, though.”

Flynn finally stopped staring at her face to look up as well. She was right; the night sky really was beautiful. He realized that he’d been avoiding looking up, too, and was relieved to see the moon uninhibited again. “It’s such a relief that everything is over.”

She lowered her gaze. “That’s right… it’s over, isn’t it?”

“You sound sad.” He looked to her. “Aren’t you glad we don’t have to worry about the Adephagos anymore?”

“Of course I am! I am so thankful that we’ve taken care of it. It’s just... it’s… well, everything else is over too, isn’t? Travelling with everyone, I mean.”

“Do you plan to return to the castle?” Flynn struggled to keep his voice level.

“Well… I’m not sure. I feel like I have to, because I have a duty to help Ioder. It’s going to be so difficult for him with all the blastia gone. But, I also want to keep travelling with everyone. Going on adventures with Brave Vesperia has been the happiest time of my life, even with all the horrible things that have happened. What do you think, Flynn?” She looked to him expectantly.

Flynn fiddled with his sore arm to give himself more time to think. He desperately wanted Estelle to return to the castle so he could see her everyday, but that was selfish. More than anything else, he wanted her to be happy. If being happy meant leaving Zaphias, he would just have to deal with that. “I think you should do what you feel is best. I used to think that the best place for a princess was the castle, but you’ve become so much more than the flighty girl I knew back then.”

“Hm…. Do you want me to stay?”

More than anything. The thought of going back to live in the castle and not be able to look forward to her running down a hall to greet him with a smile and a laugh crushed him. But, this was her life and it shouldn’t be about him. “You’re an intelligent, brave, and resourceful woman, and I wouldn’t presume to tell you how you ought to live your life.”

“O-oh…. Thank you, Flynn. I’m so resourceful and brave that I couldn’t handle a single Erdas, though, hm?”

Flynn froze. No, damn, he hadn’t meant to offend her! He felt like crap and only the slight smile to indicate she was more amused than upset kept him from grovelling at her feet. As it was, he still gushed words with little forethought. “Please forgive me. I didn’t mean to insult you capability. Of course you’re able to defend yourself, Lady Estellise, I just… when I saw a monster going toward you I panicked. I couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to you, not again, I couldn’t live with myself if I failed to save you again-”

Estelle’s slight smile had turned to surprise and upset at his last sentence, and then she cut him off with a finger pressed to his lips. “Flynn….” With her other hand, she took his gently. “I told you I don’t blame you for what happened with Alexei, didn’t I? It isn’t your fault. You didn’t know what Alexei was planning.”

When she lowered her finger, Flynn struggled not to visibly cringe. “But I should have.”

She squeezed his hand tighter. “There are things I regret not seeing sooner, too.”

“Like what?”

“Things like… like how much I care about certain people. How important some people are to my life. Maybe if I’d realized how I felt sooner, we’d both be in a different place by now.”

Flynn’s anxiety made him feel like he was breathing through a straw. “W-which people…?”

She took his other hand. “Flynn… if you have to save me today to make up for not saving me before, there’s one thing you can do that I would really appreciate.”

“What might that be?”

“Be the deciding factor in me staying in Zaphias or not. My choice is between being with my loved ones or staying to do my duty. But, maybe if Zaphias also had a loved one… if it had, um… a person I care deeply for who wanted me to stay… then I could make my decision. So, I’ll ask you again. Do you want me to stay in Zaphias?”

She met his eyes. Her hands were trembling. Her face was flushed with nerves. The question was so much more than where she should live and the thought of answering it truthfully terrified him. However, the thought of not answering truthfully, and the life-sans-Estelle he would have – physically and emotionally – the moment he told her to leave was even more dreadful. Faced with those two prospects, there was really only one choice.

“Yes,” he whispered. “Yes, I want you to stay… with me.”

Estelle’s nervous expression spread into a broad smile. “Really?”

Flynn hadn’t expected needing to confirm it twice and fumbled through a, “Um, yes?”

She pushed herself to her tip-toes and kissed his cheek. Warmth spread from her lips to his face, and then rushed down his spine in a wave of giddiness that threatened to take out his knees. His legs felt like collapsing, so he used that as an excuse to grab Estelle and pull her against him. From there, it was easy to reach her upturned face and kiss her lips.

Flynn had daydreamed about this for longer than he cared to admit. He’d always brushed those daydreams aside as silly, because there was no way it would ever be possible for him to kiss the princess. Even once he was appointed acting commandant, he still assumed it was a distant dream because it still relied on her wanting to kiss him back. Today, though, they had destroyed the Adephagos and rewritten the structure of the world. It was already such an impossibly weird day; this might as well happen.

So, he ran his fingers through her hair and clutched her to his chest until she finally backed away. Her arms still circled his neck, and she smiled at his expression. He could only imagine it was some combination of baffled, overjoyed, and exhausted.

“Ok,” Estelle said. “I’ll stay in Zaphias. Thank you for saving me from having to make that decision.”

“Of course.” He traced his fingers along her cheek. “I’ll save you however many times it takes, no matter how big or how small.”

“How many times it takes for what?”

“For me to forgive myself for failing to save you the one time it really mattered.”

Estelle smiled sadly and then leaned forward to rest her head on his shoulder. “Oh, Flynn. Now I’ll have to go throwing myself into danger over and over again to try to help you find that forgiveness.”

Flynn stroked the back of her head. “Please don’t, Estellise. I don’t think my heart could take the stress. And for now, I don’t think I can stay awake much longer. Will you accompany me back to town?”

“Yes. A bed sounds wonderful.” She slipped her hand into his to walk back to Aurnion.

Despite his exhaustion, Flynn had a spring in his step as he joined her on the walk to the inn.

#tales of vesperia #flystelle #flynn scifo #Estellise Sidos Heurassein #nightfoot writes things #talessecretsanta2019

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peaceisadirtyword · 5 years

Text

Secrets XIII (Modern!Ivar/Reader)

A/N: Late, as always, but finally! I will post more this week, I promise♥️ I hope this is not too boring, sorry💔

Warnings: an attempt of fluff, angst (?), plot twist at the end (very bad written)

Words: 3751

Inspiration: Griffenholm Confessionals by @akamaiden @laketaj24@ivarsshieldmadien @ivarswickedqueen

gif isn’t mine... I can’t remember the author, please if you know it tell me💞

You weren't really sure of what the hell was happening.

Someone had called Hvitserk, and he left after telling you to stay there, not giving any explanation or anything, he just left, taking the keys with him and locking the door.

And you were waiting since then.

You couldn't really do anything, you tried reading some books Ivar had in his room, watching television and even playing some video games on their Play Station 4. But you couldn't focus, the anxiety and the uncertainty didn't let you. You were exhausted, but even laying on Ivar's bed, surrounded by darkness and in complete silence, you couldn't sleep.

You tried calling Hvitserk, Ivar, Ubbe, even Sigurd, but none of them picked up their phones. Not even a message.

What worried you the most was that Ivar's phone didn't have a signal, it was like he had lost it... But if he had lost his phone, he would have found another way to contact you, right? Or Hvitserk would have told you.

Sighing, you reached for your phone, unlocking it and turning around to lie upside down.

Nothing.

You groaned, how much time did they think they could have you locked in there?

Maybe they're in danger.

Maybe Ivar is in danger.

You gulped, trying to calm down. Nothing wrong has happened with Ivar, they would have called you...

Just when you were about to leave the hundredth voice message on Hvitserk's voicemail, your phone screen lightened up.

You picked it up quickly, not even looking at the caller id.

"Hello?" You panted, laying down on your back and biting your lip.

"Y/N" Aslaug's gentle voice surprised you "How are you, my dear?"

"I'm... Fine" you furrowed your brows "Is everything alright?"

"Yes" you could hear a smile on her voice "I was just calling to make sure you were okay, Hvitserk asked me to"

"Where is he? And Ivar? No one would answer me and Hvitserk didn't say anything when he left..."

"Don't worry" Aslaug interrupted you, and you could hear she was nervous "Please, go to sleep, Y/N, the boys will be fine"

"Okay..." You sighed.

"Get some rest, my dear, Hvitserk will call you in the morning"

"Alright, thank you" you frowned "Good night"

"Good night, honey"

She hung up, and you stood there looking at your phone.

Something was wrong.

You didn't remember falling asleep, but somehow you did. A loud noise woke you up, startled and confused.

The first thing you did was look at your phone. It was four in the morning, and the noises didn't stop. You could hear voices, and you tensed up, grabbing your phone and getting out of bed, shaking as you walked down the hall to the kitchen.

You grabbed a knife, gripping it tightly, but relaxed a bit when you heard Hvitserk's voice at the other side of the door.

He entered the apartment alone, though you could hear Ubbe's voice.

"You scared me to death, Hvitserk" you sighed, throwing the knife to the door and rubbing your eyes.

But he wasn't smiling. You had never seen Hvitserk look so serious, and you frowned as he looked at you and sighed in relief.

"Are you okay, Y/N?" His eyes scanned you up and down, looking for any possible injuries you may have.

"Yes, well now I'm on the edge of a fucking heart attack, but I'm fine... What happened? Is everything alright? Where is Ivar?"

"He's coming now, with Sigurd and Ubbe" he answered, moving around the apartment and looking everywhere "Y/N, when did you go to sleep?"

You frowned, looking at him as he kneeled next to the bed and looking under it.

"It was past midnight, but... Hvitserk, how do you know I was asleep?" you were more and more confused. Why was he acting so weird?

"Did you hear anything?"

"No" you bit your lip, following him as he entered the bathroom and looked inside the shower "What is happening? What are you looking for?"

He stopped looking then, and turned around to look at you, opening his mouth to speak.

But another loud noise interrupted him, and Ubbe's deep voice echoed down the hall.

"Hey! We could use some help!"

Hvitserk ran to the door, with you behind him. But what you saw made you freeze.

Ivar was there, yes, supported by Ubbe and Sigurd. His forehead was covered in sweat and he was almost unconscious, his blue eyes were narrowed and he was panting, grunting whenever he had to move his body.

In that moment you understood he definitely had been in danger, and you had to lean on the wall to stop yourself from falling down.

They carried Ivar to his room, laying him down onto the bed. Ivar cursed in danish a few times, but only when Ubbe turned on the lamp on the bedside table, you could see his face.

He was covered in blood, his lower lip was broken, and one of his eyes was bleeding. You winced and gasped, not daring to approach him.

"Call Helga" Ubbe raised his head to look at Sigurd, who nodded and left the room, his phone in hand.

Immediately, Ubbe's eyes focused on you.

"He's okay, Y/N, he will be fine"

"The other guy ended up worse" Hvitserk smiled a bit for the first time.

Your heart raced as you approached the bed, kneeling next to him.

"Ivar" you muttered, caressing his hair.

To say you were scared was an understatement. Hvitserk and Ivar told you it wasn't dangerous, that they had everything under control and that Ragnar would be able to protect Ivar.

They obviously lied to you.

Ivar reacted to your touch, but he groaned and winced in pain again when he tried to move.

"What happened to him?" your voice was shaking, and you had to clear your throat to avoid a sob.

"They broke his right leg" Ubbe sighed "So he wouldn't be able to stand up and they could beat him as they wanted... They underestimated him enough to leave just one guy to hit him... Half of the blood isn't his, but they hit his head"

You felt like throwing up, and Hvitserk had to hold your shoulders so you wouldn't fall off the bed.

"Who... Who did this? I don't understand, Ubbe..." you shook your head.

"Ecbert" Hvitserk scoffed.

"It wasn't him" Ubbe shook his head "Ecbert kept father, but released Ivar... This must be Aelle's doing"

"I... I thought they were only going to negotiate..."

"Yeah, that was the plan" Ubbe sighed, frowning when Ivar moved his head, his eyes closed tightly "He was unconscious when we found him, but he woke up when we moved him... Now he's in the middle"

Sigurd entered the room, sitting next to you on the bed.

"Helga and Floki are coming... There's no news from Ragnar"

"What happened to Ragnar?" You gulped again, looking at Sigurd confused.

Hvitserk took your hand softly, pushing you out of the bed and guiding you to the door, ignoring your protests.

"Hvitserk! What are you doing? We need to take care of him! He's injured!"

"Helga is coming, she's a nurse and she'll know what to do, Y/N, come on" he pushed you slightly to the door.

"Will you please explain to me what the hell is happening, Hvitserk?"

After your almost-kiss with him, you had promised yourself you would talk to him seriously, explain to him that you were now with Ivar, you didn't want to hurt any of them and you definitely didn't want them fighting because of you. Hvitserk was amazing, and if he hadn't fucked Margrethe while still seeing you, you'd probably have fell in love with him.

But of course, everything related to the almost-kiss and Hvitserk's possible feelings for you was erased from your mind.

He guided you into the living room, closing the door and sighing before turning around to look at you.

"Did Ivar tell you something about where he was going?"

"He just told me he had to go and talk to... Ecbert? With your dad"

"He didn't say why?"

"No" you shrugged, crossing your arms and hugging yourself. You were trembling.

Hvitserk took a blanket from the couch and put it over your shoulders before making you sit down.

"Ecbert and Aelle" he started "Are the biggest competitors to my father's business, and as he wanted to expand to England and settle some offices there, he made a deal with Ecbert, who he considered his friend" Hvitserk frowned. You just nodded, not really wanting to ask about his father's kind of business "The night of the Christmas dinner, five of my father's guys were killed by one of Ecbert's, and Ragnar decided to go and have a peaceful negotiation with him, at his house, Ivar went with him... But things didn't go as planned, and Ecbert has my father now, he let Ivar go because he promised, but Aelle wanted him out of the equation too, so I suppose he sent some guys to kill him, but my underestimating my little brother never goes well" he chuckled, trying to hide a proud little smile "But now Ragnar is missing"

You were panting, your head was spinning and you felt like throwing up. The fact that you had been there, watching TV and reading while Ivar was in serious danger made you feel sick.

"You okay, Y/N?" Hvitserk frowned "Ivar is okay, he will be cursing everyone and screaming at me for leaving you alone in a few hours, don't worry, Helga works magic"

In that moment, someone knocked at the door, you saw Sigurd running to the door and opening it. You recognized Floki and Helga's voices as they rushed down the hall, to Ivar's room.

Hvitserk took your arm to keep you in place as you were standing up to go to Ivar's side.

"Trust me, you don't want to see that"

"But I want to be with him!" you glared at him. How could he be so relaxed, when his brother was so badly hurt?

He must be used to it by now.

The thought of it made you shiver.

"He'll be okay, Y/N, besides, didn't you want to hear what was happening?"

You looked to the closed door of the living room once again, but stayed still, with Hvitserk's hand still on your arm.

"Ubbe called me" he sighed "I was supposed to stay here with you, just in case, but they needed help to locate Ivar, Ecbert just said they took his crutches and left him on the streets, but Aelle found him before us, and when we finally did he was pretty wounded, though he killed the guy that beat him easily" you flinched. You knew Ivar wasn't exactly a saint, but to hear that he killed a man with his own hands, those same hands that had caressed your skin so softly just some hours ago... "I had locked the door, when I left the apartment, and I thought you were safe, but he cursed me for like half an hour when he understood you were here by yourself... I'm sorry for not picking up the phone or replying to your messages, by the way, I told my mother to call you and calm you down" he smiled softly to you "And everything was okay until I received one more message, just after we found Ivar" he ran his hand through his hair, shaking his head "I swear, my heart stopped, and Sigurd was stupid enough to say your name out loud, which made Ivar open his eyes immediately"

"My name?" You cleared your throat "I didn't send any other message after Aslaug called me, I fell asleep" you muttered, biting your lip and trying to remember if you had sent anything before closing your eyes.

"Yeah, it wasn't you" he moved in his seat, nervous "Do you remember the first night of the holidays? When we came to Copenhagen with you, Ivar and you reconciled that night" he raised an eyebrow "I heard you, so you have to remember it"

You blushed, but nodded.

"When we were on that cafeteria" he sighed "Two guys entered, and they immediately spotted you two. They were surprised to say the least, I think they didn't imagine Ivar kissing a girl on a coffee date, to be honest I was a bit surprised too... But they approached you"

"I remember" you nodded "Ivar was really angry while talking to them"

"Well" he cleared his throat "It's normal, they were saying... Some nasty things about you"

"About me?"

"Yeah, one of them mentioned how pretty you looked, that's not that bad, but you know Ivar" he rolled your eyes "He reacted the way they wanted him to, and as he got more and more aggressive, they started to say worse things until one of them said he had a very good taste when choosing his whores"

Maybe if ha had told you in another situation, you would have been offended, but in that moment you couldn't care less.

"The other laughed and said Ivar should recommend the place where he got you, and then I had to intervene to avoid the start of the third world war, and when they said goodbye, one said he was glad Ivar had got a girlfriend, and that Aelle would be glad to hear about it"

"So they were..."

"They work for him, yes... And I received a message from one of them" he took his phone out, unlocking it nervously "Don't panic, okay?"

The message was short, accompanied by a photo. Your eyes widened when you recognized yourself, dressed with Ivar's hoodie and sleeping on the bed.

You looked at the hour. It was just one hour before they came into the house. Your heart sank and you felt sick again.

You left something behind, didn't you?

"What is this?" You muttered, your hands shaking and your eyes glued to the screen.

"A threat, a way to tell us that they could do whatever they want to you"

"But I didn't do anything" you frowned "I don't have anything to do with Ecbert, or Aelle or any of those guys, why...?"

"I told you, they tormented Ivar in the cafeteria to get a reaction from him" he explained patiently "They wanted to know if Ivar cared about you, because if he cares about you, they only need to hurt you to hurt him" he rolled his eyes "It's a bit of a cliche, isn't it? But it would be effective, Ivar would lose his shit if they touched you"

"Oh" you blushed, not knowing if you should feel good because Ivar cared about you or scared because you could die because of that "I didn't... I didn't hear anything"

"It's better this way" Hvitserk took his phone again, locking it "If you were awake, you'd probably be dead by now"

You shuddered again. How did your life go from having to worry only for your grades to fear for your life because your new boyfriend's enemies wanted to kill you in just a few months?

It was like a movie, though movies were more fun.

When Ivar woke up, he felt an intense pain on his leg. He was used to feel pain almost every morning, but that day was even worse. His head was spinning and his knuckles hurt.

He groaned, trying to move on the bed, but another shot of pain left him panting and touching his thigh. Something moved next to him.

He looked at his side, frowning when he saw you curled up by his side, with your head on his shoulder and sleeping. He stopped his movements immediately, not wanting to wake you up.

Carefully, he lifted the duvet, growling when he noticed his right leg was splinted, secured with straps to keep it still. He sighed, looking at the wheelchair next to the door. He remembered Ecbert's men taking away his crutches and silently cursed them for confining him to that stupid chair again.

You opened your eyes softly, yawning and rubbing your eyes before noticing Ivar was awake.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up" he sighed shaking his head.

"You didn't" you smiled widely at him "How are you? Are you in pain? Helga left some medicines in the kitchen, if you want I can bring them to you.. She will come to see if everything's okay later, with Aslaug, she’s worried about you... Are you sure you don’t need anything?"

"Y/N" he sighed "Stop that, you sound like my mother"

He didn't mean to sound harsh or snap at you. After all, you weren't guilty of anything. And the way your smile faded at his tone made him angrier.

"Where are my brothers?" He asked, looking away from you.

"Ubbe is in the couch, resting a bit" you answered, clearing your throat "Hvitserk and Sigurd are out with Floki, looking for Ragnar"

"They haven't found him yet" it wasn't a question. Ivar pressed his lips together, frowning.

"No... But I'm sure he's okay" you tried to smile to him again.

He didn't answer, just shrugged and fixed his eyes on the wall in front of him.

He was feeling guilty, useless and stupid. If it hadn't been for him, those guys wouldn't even know your name, and you'd be safe even outside the apartment, all alone. That photo was the last thing he remembered before waking up in pain and surrounded of people, calling you desperately. He hadn't calmed down until Ubbe assured him you were okay, resting on another room. And then, darkness again.

And he should be looking for his father, like his brothers, not there in a comfortable bed... If only he could walk like a normal person...

Ivar looked at you again, you had stopped looking at him and were now examining your own nails with a small pout on your lips that made him smile a bit. You always pouted like that when you thought someone was upset with you, and you didn't even realize it.

"Y/N" he muttered your name, making you look at him, wary "Are you okay?"

"You sound like my mother" you said, raising an eyebrow. Ivar smiled a bit, sighing "Yes, I'm okay, I don't have a broken leg, so I should be asking you"

"I'm fine" he shook his head "We shouldn't have left that suite"

You bit you lip to contain a smile and leaned in to kiss his lips softly. The kiss didn't last long though, as he groaned and turned his head.

"Fuck! Sorry!" You widened your eyes. You had completely forgotten about his bruised lip "Sorry, I didn't mean to... Did I hurt you?"

He shook his head, touching his lip with a frown.

A knock on the door startled you. Ubbe was standing there with a smile on his lips.

"I see you're feeling better"

"Any news?"

Ubbe shook his head and Ivar clenched his jaw, looking away.

"I... Am going to the bathroom" you got up, leaving the room and entering the bathroom, closing the door after you.

Ubbe looked at the closed door and sighed, turning his head to look at his brother.

"It's not her fault Ivar"

"I know that" he scoffed, rubbing his eyes.

"Then?" Ubbe raised his eyebrow

"I made a mistake, Ubbe, a huge mistake" Ivar pressed his lips together "I shouldn't have invited her home, I shouldn't have taken her to the Christmas dinner, and I definitely shouldn't have let all of this go public"

"All of this?"

"This, she and I, us"

"And why is that?" His older brother cleared his throat.

"Because I fucking knew this would happen, Ubbe, I knew someone would try and hurt her... For fuck's sake, Ubbe, did you see her? She's scared as fuck! And that's my fault"

"Hvitserk was the one that explained everything to her, he told me she handled it very well, she didn't cry or anything like that"

"Of course, Hvitserk was so worried about her that he had to be the one telling her" he scoffed again, clenching his jaw.

"She has the right to know what happened to you and what nearly happened to her, Ivar, Hvitserk cares about her and as you were unconscious, he was the one who talked to her"

"Sure" he rolled his eyes.

Inside the bathroom, you splashed some water on your face. It was like the holidays had never happened and you were still in the school. You tried your best not to look scared or too nervous, though you had been throwing up all night. You didn't want him to feel bad or worry about you, but he was acting... Weird.

He wasn't like the Ivar that kissed you lovingly before leaving the hotel, who told you he loved you looking into your eyes.

You looked at your reflection on the mirror. Maybe you shouldn't have stayed in his bed to sleep, maybe you overwhelmed him by sleeping next to him... Ivar was now worried about his father and his wounds... He has enough without you acting so clingy.

Your phone vibrated inside Ivar's hoodie pocket. You took it out and unlocked it.

How are you?😘

Hvitserk. You smiled softly. He had been a sweetheart to you, worried about how you felt after hearing the whole story.

I'm okay, thanks Hvitty😊 Ivar just woke up, anything new?

You sighed, leaning onto the wall and biting your nail while waiting for his reply.

Nothing yet, we're still searching... Take care, okay? See you soon😘

Be careful💞

You locked your phone, breathing deeply before going out of the bathroom.

Ubbe was leaving Ivar's room, and immediately smiled warmly at you.

"I cooked something, come and eat, you need it" he winked at you.

"But..." You looked at Ivar's door

"It's fine, Y/N" Ubbe shook his head "Come, it's better if you give him some time"

You sighed but nodded and followed him to the kitchen.

It happened when you were eating, talking with Ubbe about school. And it happened so quickly...

Ubbe's phone started ringing. He frowned before picking up, and you knew something was wrong when he gasped and cleared his throat.

His eyes were teary, and he shook his head before hanging up and rubbing his eyes.

"Ubbe?" you asked warily "Is everything okay?"

He looked at you, and took a deep breath before answering.

"It was Hvitserk... Ragnar is dead"

Tags: @mblaqgi @alicedopey @cbouvier23 @lol-haha-joke @hallowed-heathen @ivarslittlebadgirl @naaladareia @tephi101 @captstefanbrandt @love-hate-love @titty-teetee @readsalot73 @moondustmemories @memememememe1-blog @dreamtherapy @rravenss @thevikingsheaux @therealcalicali @thehanneloner @fuckthatfeeling @drowninginyoureyes95 @chimera4plums @mrstheorossix3 @blushingskywalker @succatababe @imcreepininyourheartbabe @austenkingmylady @timber3 @unacceptabletatertots @awkwardfangirl02 @athroatfullofglass @shipping-not-sailing @miserablecunt @two-unbeatable-beaters @gruffle1 @bucketfairies @tatidark @justacripple @love-dria @heartbeats-wildly

#ivar imagine #ivar the boneless #vikings #vikings imagine #modern ivar #secrets #modern vikings

266 notes · View notes

strxberry-milk · 5 years

Text

WIRES

1|2

genre:fluff, mafia au, angst, neighbour au

pairing:reader x gang member!changbin

warnings:n/a

word count:2.3k

four months passed after i witnessed a murder. changbin was very much my only support network at the that time, i couldn’t talk to my uni friends of work colleagues since they would go to the police. changbin tried his best not talk about his gang but i had questions i wanted answers too. so a tuesday night we sat down and he explained everything - he told me what his gang done, who the members were etc.

at first i was nervous, they had made a lot of enemies that were constantly out to get them but changbin made it very clear that he would make sure i was out of it at all times. we had spent many nights together sitting in each other’s apartments, binging tv shows together and stuffing our faces of fast food. when i worked the late shift at the restaurant changbin would always wait outside for me and we’d walk home together, it made me feel safer and changbin felt the same. he didn’t say anything but i knew he was worried about the yakuza finding out i seen the murder.

we had grown closer over the months, i had told him things that nobody knew other than me. i told him about my parents death and how i had to fend on my own for a year, it was still hard to talk about them even though it happened three years ago. changbin also shared things, he felt guilty for not talking to his parents after joining SKZ but he had his reasons. he didn’t want to put them in danger that’s why he was always so distant towards me when we seen each other in the hall of our floor.

—

i was half way through my saturday night shift. the restaurant was buzzing with loud chat and laughter while people tucked into their meals. i had three hours until i could leave to meet changbin which i made me excited but anxious at the same time. i walked round the restaurant, picking up empty plates and glasses, taking orders and giving customers the bill of their meal. we had booths in our restaurant that usually large numbers of people sat in but it was nearer the back.

“y/n table thirty are ready to order,” my manager said pointing to the second booth, “okay,” i sighed grabbing my notepad and pen before walking over, “hi my name is y/n and i’ll be your waitress for this evening,” i flashed a fake smile while spitting out my scripted line that i had lost count of saying. i didn’t notice at first due the dim lighting of the booth but as i worked my way round the table i suddenly had a sense of danger hit me. the last man to give me his order was familiar.

it was odd i couldn’t put my finger on it until he said one sentence. “i’ll go for my favourite. i liked that the last time,” as soon as the word like left his mouth the realisation clicked. he was the member of the yakuza. he killed the man in the alley. a sudden sick feeling came over me like a strong wave of the sea, quickly writing down what he wanted i left in a dash. anxiety filling my stomach. if he noticed that i was there that night he would have noticed that it was me who served him. “i’m taking my break,” i muttered to my colleague before rushing off to the locker room.

scrambling through my bag to find my phone which happened to be at the very bottom, i immediately called changbin. “please pick up,” i whispered desperately, panic rising in my chest. “who is this?” a unrecognisable voice spoke from the other side of the line, “uhm is changbin there?” i muttered and soon enough his voice came through after noises of shuffling and muffled voices in the background. “y/n what’s wrong?” he asked as if he already knew i was panicking.

“the man from the alley is here,” i breathed out heavily, sitting down from the overwhelming dizziness and my heart beating loud in my ears. “does he know it’s you?” he asked calmly but the discomfort was there. “i...i don’t know,” stuttering i let out a few deep breaths trying to calm myself. “y/n, avoid the table okay? i don’t want you getting in danger,” he stated strongly, i nodded to what he was saying forgetting that he couldn’t see me, “i’ll come get you at the usual time just be careful please,” changbin pleaded, i let out a little okay and hung up knowing i’d have to get back to the table.

the tables food was ready and i had to take it over not matter how hard i tried to get someone else to do it, we were all busy. sighing inwardly i picked up the plates of food and plastered a fake smile on my face. after placing the plates infront of the men i asked the usual question “anything else i can get you,” a choruses of no’s were heard and everyone apart of the yakuza member started to tuck into their meals. “do i know you?” he asked puzzled, anxiety filled my chest and my smile faltered slightly. “i don’t think so, enjoy your meal,” i smiled and walked away breathing heavily.

—

my shift was finally over but the table i dreaded serving was still in the booth. grabbing my bag and jacket, i waved a few goodbyes to my coworkers and left the now quiet restaurant. changbin texted me a few minutes ago saying he was going to be ten minutes and just to wait at the door like usual so i did. it was chiller at night, so i ended up pulling my jacket closer to my body trying to keep the small amount of heat i had.

changbin soon arrived a small smile on his face, “hey you ready?” he asked signalling for me to follow. when walking home i didn’t notice that the older yakuza member watching us leave together.

“do you want to get pizza?” i faced him finally acknowledging the hunger growing, “definitely,” he laughed and we started to walk faster so we could get our fast food. changbin and i entered my apartment and he went straight to phone to order our midnight snack while i went to change out of my jeans into something more comfortable. “i got cheese and pepperoni,” he announced when i walked back in with pillows and blankets in my arms.

the couch soon turned into a makeshift bed for us, i stuck on a movie for us to watch while we ate. this was what usually happened on a saturday night and i looked forward to it everytime. twenty minutes passed and finally the doorbell rang, i jumped out of the multiple duvets and raced to the door. “that’ll be twelve seventy three,” the young pizza delivery man said and handed over the pizza after i gave the money over, a small thanks and i was racing back to the living room.

we ate in almost complete silence, the only noises were from the tv and the occasional car driving past but it wasn’t many. the two boxes were soon empty and that remained was the grease stains and bits of crusts i didn’t eat. “i needed that,” i sighed in content laying back onto the pillows. “me too,” changbin hummed in agreement and slided the pizza boxes near the small dining table. “y/n did he talk to you tonight?” he suddenly questioned about the gang member.

i nodded and explained to him that he recognised me and that he must of seen me hiding in the alleyway that night. “if he comes back, please be careful,” changbin took my hand gently looking me straight in the eyes which was a little bit intimidating. i just nodded unable to form words, his face was so close to mine. my eyes wavered and ended up dropping to look at his lips. without realising what was happening we both leaned in. our lips brushed against eachothers and were soon attached.

he brought his hand up to my cheek cupping it lightly. my hands found their way to his hair, entangling my fingers in his locks, when we broke away our foreheads pressed against eachothers and my eyes shut. “i think you should stay,” i whispered smirking lightly, “i agree,” and he attacked my lips with more kisses.

the following morning i woke wrapped up in changbin’s strong grip. smiling softly i buried my head further into his chest, “morning,” his gruff voice spoke, vibrating in his chest. “morning,” i sighed happily, changbin’s fingers drew soft patterns on my bare shoulder lulling me back to sleep. “what time is it?” i groaned as the morning sun hit my eyes, “just after ten,” he answered and his grip tightened.

we lay in eachothers arms for the next two hours - chatting nosense and drifting in and out of sleep. “we need to get up now,” i giggled trying to finally sit up but changbin’s grip kept me down. “changbin, come on!” i cried out attempting to sit up another few times, “five more minutes,” he smirked closing his eyes. “five more minutes turns into two hours with you,” i sighed and his grip loosened so i could bow sit up. my bare shoulders were exposed to the chilly air making me chitter slightly, “five more minutes actually,” i wrapped myself in the duvets and cuddled into changbin trying to heat myself back up. he then erupted in giggles at my reaction to the cold air.

when we actually got up it was one o’clock in the afternoon which meant i had four hours before i had to go back to work at five. “i’ll make us some lunch,” changbin announced and made his way to my kitchen before i could protest. while he was in the kitchen, i started to tidy up from the night before; folding the extra blankets and putting them back in the hall cupboard, binning the empty pizza boxes and riding up my messy bed.

changbin came out with two plates of kimchi fried rice with a fried egg on top of each moutain of rice. “wow this looks great,” my stomach grumbled after looking at the plate of food, my hunger only setting in now. smiling widely i tucked into the food as soon as the plate hit the table, “thank you,” i hummed in content. “glad you like it,” he chuckled.

—

changbin let out a groan full of annoyance as we sat in his apartment, “what?” i asked looking up from the book in my hands. “i’m bored,” he moaned, poking my cheek with his finger. “how about we go out for dinner?” i offered and it was an immediate yes, chuckling i got up abandoning my book to go get changed into something more smart than sport leggings and a baggy jumper.

i had a few clothes items in changbin’s wardrobe after spending nearly three months here. after the night in my apartment, our relationship went from friends to lovers quite quickly. SKZ hadn’t been busy for the past few weeks, and the yakuza was staying low which was strange but i was happy that changbin was safe from danger.

changing into a denim skirt and t-shirt i looked a bit more put together than before. “where should we go?” i asked walking through the hall, mascara in one hand and concealer in the other. “what about the pizza place oro?” he called out from the living room. “sure,”. once i was ready i changbin emerged with our jackets in his arms, “it’ll be cold outside here,” he smiled and handed over my thicker jacket over. “thanks,” i gave him a quick peck on the lips and made my way to the front door remembering to pick the house keys up from the cabinet.

changbin took my hand as we walked down the stairs away from the comfort of the apartment. “at least it’s only ten minutes away,” i pointed out as the cold air hit my exposed face. november’s weather was coming in hard this year and i was not a fan - i hated the cold weather which usually came with rain and winds. i stuck closer to changbin’s side as we walked down the street hand in hand.

we were seated after a few minutes of waiting since it was a busy friday night. “y/n, i need to tell you something,” changbin sighed, putting down the paper menu. “what is it?” i asked confusion written across my face nerves suddenly filled my stomach, “the.... the yakuza sent us a warning yesterday,” he explained - “they said that they know you were there that night,” he grabbed my hand as i started to panic. “changbin... what do i do?” i whispered gripping his hand tighter. “nothing, you going to live your life normally, and i’m going to protect you,” he brought my hand to his mouth and placed a chaste kiss on my knuckles.

our dinner conversation was filled with our worried thoughts about the situation we were now faced with. i knew they had been too quiet, changbin sometimes came home with bruises and cuts littering his skin but recently nothing. “the guys are going to help obviously,” he assured, pasta wrapping around his fork. my appetite was gone and stress came in it’s place.

i cleared half of my plate before i started to feel sick from nerves, anxiety was slowly creeping up but changbin was there to keep me calm. “how about we go get ice cream and a movie?” he asked smiling sweetly. we payed the small bill and left the restaurant. “we’ll be fine,” he assured hugging my side tighter.

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enbiart · 5 years

Text

Paranoia

Words: 1.7k

Summary:

The traitor could be anyone. Anyone.

( @radiantmyde it’s the best boy...Gula...)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Your role is to find the traitor.”

Gula shivered, and pulled his hood further over his face. He crossed his arms, trying to rub some warmth into them. The robes he and his fellow Leaders wore were more traditional than practical, it seemed. Then again, bitterly cold nights like this weren’t exactly the norm in Daybreak Town. A part of him wondered if the ever-growing darkness could cause chill like this.

It certainly didn’t help that Gula was out on the streets still, not even close to the warmth of his room in the clocktower. He had stayed out later than normal to let the evening pass into night and avoid the other Leaders for a day, taking his time watching the inhabitants of Daybreak Town go about their day.

Watching for signs of the traitor.

But now, he walked briskly, trying to get home as soon as possible and warm up. He breathed out and watched the mist puff out. It was freezing, before soon it wouldn’t surprise Gula if he woke up to a thick layer of snow. The thought of it snowing in Daybreak Town was a bit exciting, actually. He’d only seen snow a handful of times, and even then it was thin and muddy. Aced slipped and broke his mask, once, trying to race him across a road that had frozen over. When Gula’d tried to help him up, albeit laughing, he had wrestled him down and they both got their robes ruined in the mud.

The memory made him chuckle. He and Aced had always been competitive with each other, whether it be in sparring matches or races and whatnot; Laughing at each other’s complaining after they lose.They wouldn’t do that now without real venom, unfortunately.

Best not to think fondly of potential traitors.

He gulped. The clocktower rang to signal midnight and Gula picked up his pace. Street lamps lit his way and casted long shadows across the road. He sighed and closed his eyes briefly, trying to will away the creepings of anxiety. His movement moved the shadowy figures on the walls and ground, and he tried in vain to ignore the dark alleyways hiding light knows what. He was the only one still out as far as he knew - the only one with even a reason to be out this late.

Unless someone followed you.

But, no one would be dumb enough to try and follow a Union Leader this late, much less attack one. Still, though, he tossed a nervous eye over his shoulder. He didn’t think even the traitor would be that stupid. Especially with Gula so watchful, now.

Nowadays, he’s always looking, always watching. Glancing over his back, scouting the crowd, picking out conversations and body language of the wielders of Daybreak Town. Ever observant, ever suspicious. If the traitor had wanted to attack him, they had missed their chance. Gula was no longer as carefree and relaxed as he was, despite the act he puts on. He has to act normal as to not attract suspicion of his own.

He can’t let the traitor get away.

He paused for a moment in the street. Shivering up and down, he took in slow, deep breaths. In, and out. In, and out. He was getting himself worked up too much right now over nothing. What kind of keyblade master is scared of shadows?

Right now, the only thing he wants to worry about is getting home to his warm bed and cozy little fire basin. Preferably sooner, rather than later.

A few more breaths and he was on the move again. Finally, he seemed to be getting close to the clocktower. But, really, why did he have to go so far out into Daybreak Town in the first place? Couldn’t he had loitered closer to home? Why did he have to move around town so much?

To get the traitor off his trail, just in case.

He shook his head. No, Gula, we are not thinking about this again. Not tonight, not until he’s in bed with comfortable pajamas, and a nice fire stoked beside him. He focused on that thought, and kept going, just a little bit faster.

The moon in the sky was bright tonight, with an array of stars spreading across. Gula stared out of the corner of his eye.

Pretty.

Invi and Ira would enjoy it, he thinks. He remembers when he was younger, back when he was just able to start summoning his keyblade, Ira would take him and Invi out on starry nights like this. He would point out constellations and teach them which stars were which. Invi would even give a fun fact from a book about this or that. Gula can’t really remember what they had said back then, though.

A shame. Maybe they could all get together like that again sometime?

Maybe I could get some information out of them.

Gula blinked. Lost in thought, he was this close to walking slam into the clocktower door. When had he got here?

Doesn’t matter, he thinks, he’s just glad that he’s here. He quickly fumbled the door opened, ignoring how numb his hands felt, and tossed one last glance behind his back. A dark, empty pathway leading back into town. Flowerbeds decorated the stone path in an array of brilliant colors. Or, used-to-be-brilliant colors. Was it just him, or were they all wilting a bit?

Ava probably doesn’t tend to it as much anymore.

The garden was mostly her idea in the first place, in fact. Before, she would drag him outside with her to help pull out weeds or carry water and fertilizer to the different plants. All the while talking about this flower or this bush while he quietly voiced his complaints. The meaning of this flower, of that one; Which fertilizer goes with which plant, and which one to not bring within fifty feet of this one. Ava used to spend a lot of time out there. The town’s not as bright without her flowers, he thinks.

Could the darkness in her heart be driving her to let them die on purpose?

Gula damn near slammed the door shut behind him as he rushed up the many stairs up to his room. His hands shook as he went, but he didn’t really care. Chalking it up to the cold, and definitely not anything else, he walked as fast up the stairs as he could without injuring himself. Really, why did they have so many chairs in the first place? Gula ventured to get to his room as soon as possible. . .Until he actually got to said hall, that is.

He stopped at the entryway, and looked solemnly down the corridor. Each room a ways apart from each other. And his all the way in the back.

He cursed at his misfortune, seeing as Ira’s bedroom still had light seeping underneath it. Gula did not stay out until midnight and almost freeze to death to be bothered now.

He took a deep, almost calming breath. Slowly, he made his way across the corridor, treading lightly as to not alert the other night owl to his presence. If he was lucky, then Ira would be too caught up in pouring over the Book of Prophecies to notice his footsteps. If not, then Ira would’ve been waiting for him to hound him with question after question of where he had been and why he was so late.

And he definitely wasn’t in the mood for a lecture.

Slowly, steadily, quietly, Gula made his way across. Past Ira’s door, thank light, without a hitch. Past Aced’s door, and wincing at the snoring he could hear even from outside. Invi’s door, which he could smell the faint smell of her unbelievably strong perfume. Ava’s door, with faded out stickers of cute animals still half scratched off her door from when she was little. And finally, his door, right next to. . .

Right next to Luxu’s.

Gula shuddered and try to ignore the sadness at seeing the door so barren. Luxu’s absence was troubling to everyone, to say the least.

Always a jokester, just like their beloved Master (who’s disappearance also left a mark), Luxu was one of their strongest. While he was seemingly careless most of the time, every now and then putting on an impishly innocent act in front of their Master, he was studious enough to put Ira to shame. He was quick and always took training seriously, enough if he seemed aloof about it.

Gula can remember countless nights where, when Ira was too busy, he and Luxu would sit in the library and go over material. Whereas Ira tried to teach as much as he could in a single sentence, often overwhelmingly, Luxu knew how to simplify the complex concepts in ways that got the idea across.

In short, Gula missed him. He wonders what made Luxu leave, anway?

Maybe he’s the traitor, and he’s waiting for the perfect chance.

Gula froze before clamming himself back inside his room, taking care not to slam his door this time. He turned back to the array of locks he had fastened to his door frame, and took his time twisting and turning them all into place. Locks really wouldn’t door much good against a traitor; If they really wanted to get in, then of course they had a keyblade. Still, though, it provided some semblance of comfort as he shivered and shook from what he didn’t think he could pass off as cold anymore.

Not after he lit the basin, and changed into his warmest night clothes, and wrapped himself in a thick comforter that did anything but comfort him. His hands shook and hurt as he held them in front of the small fire and tried to control his breathing. In, out. In, out. In, out.

Those locks really won’t stop anyone from getting in, only you getting out.

Gula shook a bit less, now, after heating up. His breathing hasn’t slowed, though. This is stupid, he thinks. There’s no way anyone would break in, traitor or not. He’s one of the Union Leaders. The other Leaders are roomed right next to him; Hell, one of them’s still awake, even. No traitor could possibly get in.

But the traitor could be anyone. Even-

Gula gulped hard and closed his eyes. Tried to focus on the warmth of the fire, the softness of his clothes, the chill of the air even. He didn’t want to think right now. Not about dangers, or darkness, or prophecies, or traitors, or ruined relationships and hated loved ones. . .

And definitely not the fact that the traitor could be right down the hall from him.

#1.7k words...yall proud #in this house we stan leopardus #my writing #kingdom hearts #kh union x #kh gula #gula kh

18 notes · View notes

kainks · 6 years

Text

midnight suck. 2

pairing: vamp!jungkook x reader

genre: vampire au, destined lovers au

warnings: scary vampy jungkook, badass min yoongi, intimidation, and a little bit of angst because reader is going through some shit

words: 4,457

summary: you had seen him drain the life out of someone, there was no way he could leave you alone now.

“Come on little human, come out and play.”

–> 1 | 3 | 4

Series updates every Saturday at 8PM PST!

The sound of a casserole dish cracking into a million pieces is what silenced your sudden screams. Taehyung and Jimin’s voices fell silent, their footsteps becoming louder as they rushed from the kitchen back into the main area of the house, confusion overcoming their features.

You on the other hand, were stone cold, petrified.

Rich, coffee eyes lit up at your quivering, enjoyment lacing his face as you stared up at him, tiny beads of sweat sliding down your temples, and fingers clutching the brass knob of the door a little too tightly.

Is this where you die? Where he sinks his pearly whites into your neck?

“I have to admit, that was not the reaction I was expecting.”

Yoongi’s voice broke out from behind you, and though you couldn’t see for yourself, you sensed a hint of a smirk on his face. What the fuck.

Without thinking, you quickly attempted to slam the front door closed, pushing your right shoulder into the heavy wood in attempts to make it close quicker, but your efforts were halted with a single black combat boot. Stuck right between the door and the wall, halting you instantly.

Your stopped breathing.

“___, what the heck are you doing!” Taehyung yelled, rushing over to your side to help pry open the door. You wanted to yell at him, plead that he was letting a monster into his own home. That you were all most likely going to die tonight.

Truthfully, your brain felt too foggy, too frozen to really grasp onto the reality you were currently in. The thing that had been haunting your consciousness for the past twenty four hours was now standing in front of you, the same thing you had seen kill a man right before your eyes.

“Yeah, what are you doing?” Yoongi questioned, chuckling from behind you.

Jimin was at his side, staring at you as if you had suddenly grown two heads, not paying attention to the satisfied face of his boyfriend. Your eyes narrowed at the older male, because he definitely knew something you didn’t.

“Come on in Jungkook, I’m sorry about that..” Taehyung pushed you behind him gently, removing you from blocking the door any further, and once it was fully opened again, you found yourself taking a few steps back.

Fuck, it really was him. You had been hoping your eyes had just been playing tricks on you, but he was really standing in Taehyung’s doorway and staring right at you. The same grin gracing his lips as the night you’d first seen him, only this time there wasn’t any blood and death surrounding him.

“It’s fine hyung,” He waved it off, stepping through the doorway with an easy stride. “I always tend to have that effect on women.”

You would have scoffed if your heart wasn’t threatening to beat right out of your chest. Adrenaline was running high through your veins, and you found yourself feeling suffocated within the small apartment.

Right as you were about to make an excuse to escape, to go hide away in the bathroom or something, Jimin was grabbing onto your shoulder from behind and turning you towards him, a look of concern on his face.

“You okay? Why did you scream like that?”

Suddenly, all eyes were on you. Panic was weighing heavy on your body, and you could tell you were seconds away from having an attack right in front of everyone.

Shaking your head, you sent him an easy smile, one that you hoped was reassuring enough. “I uh- I saw a moth. It was.. really big.”

You really were a fucking terrible liar. You avoided making any eye contact with Taehyung, or the killer beside him, and instead sighed with relief as Jimin lightly laughed at your half ass excuse.

“You hear that Jungkook, it wasn’t you after all. She saw a bug.”

Then everyone was laughing, Yoongi pulling Jimin into his side to give him a quick peck on the cheek, and you would have rolled your eyes at the sight, if it wasn’t for Jimin’s blushing cheeks and fond smile. You had a sickening feeling that there was something up with Yoongi, the guy was just too mysterious.

You would’ve slipped away in that moment, if Taehyung’s hand hadn’t grabbed your wrist, turning you to face him. You really didn’t want to, because Jungkook was standing right next to him, close enough to touch, and you wanted nothing more than to run away and hide.

When Taehyung looked at your face, his smile instantly dropped. That was an advantage of knowing someone so closely for a long period of time, you were able to catch on instantly when something wasn’t quite right. And Taehyung sensed that almost immediately.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

He leaned in closer, voice lowering to a whisper as to not alert anyone else. You could hear Jimin and Yoongi talking, all the while he was leaned up against the front door, which was now closed, arms crossed and seemingly listening in on both conversations. Yet his eyes never once left you and Taehyung.

Oh god.

“Y-yeah, I’m.. fine.” You swallowed back the nauseous feeling in your stomach. “I think I need to go lay down more..”

It seemed as if Taehyung wasn’t as convinced as Jimin, opening his mouth to say something, but ultimately deciding against it. Instead, he nodded his head, the hand on your wrist coming up to grab your shoulder in a comforting squeeze.

“Sure, that’s fine.” His eyes did a quick glance over to the three guests, before landing back on you. “I’ll bring you some dinner when it’s done, just in case you’re hungry later okay?”

Your heart felt heavy from Taehyung’s gentle nature towards you, and you quickly nodded in reply, sending him a grateful smile. “Thanks Tae…” You choked out in a whisper, right before turning around and bolting from the room.

It was rude, and bold, just leaving so suddenly, but you were sure your knees were going to give out any second. Your body felt light, like you were floating, as you rushed down the hallway and towards the guest bedroom.

You couldn’t believe you were currently in the same vicinity as a murderer. Not only did you fear for your own life, but Taehyung and Jimin’s as well. And maybe Yoongi, just a little bit.

You slammed the door to the bedroom harshly, securing the lock into place and therefore your own safety. Or so you hoped. You had a hard time believing that a cheap bedroom lock could keep a.. him out.

You slid down the door in a silent relief, yet your veins still ran cold as you shut your eyes, seeing nothing but your own blood staining cherry red lips.

/~/

Time seemed to stop altogether, the longer you sat against the door. Your erratic heart had long but slowed down to a steady, yet worrisome pulse. You were bathed in a sea of black, not having found the energy to reach up for the light switch. It was an eerie isolation, yet it allowed your mind the chance to break through the confusion.

Like how Taehyung and Jimin seemed to know Jungkook surprisingly well. Like how Yoongi was definitely keeping a secret, one that you were sure was no good.

Oh, and there was also the fact that Jungkook was a killer.

A fucking vampire.

Honestly, if you weren’t so scared, you would have been consumed with rage instead. How dare he mess up your stupid little life, that you had been living just fine before he showed up and drained the blood out of a man right in front of you.

It was all too much.

What was even worse, was that he knew you were staying at Taehyung’s now. Your chance at hiding away was all but useless. You had nowhere else to go, and no money to stay anywhere.

If he was planning on killing you, you hoped he got it over with quick. The anxiety of sitting around, waiting, was consuming you into a blinding sickness.

“I’ve lost my mind, oh my go-”

Two knocks on the door halted any remaining thoughts.

Your body tensed against the wood, breaths stilling in your lungs in attempt to be as quiet as possible. You had no idea who was on the other side, but you really didn’t feel like dealing with anyone at the moment.

It was probably Taehyung, bringing you dinner.

You knew you couldn’t ignore him, not when he’d been so concerned over the way you’d acted earlier. Plus, you really didn’t want him asking any unnecessary questions. Especially when you didn’t have easy answers to give.

It’s better to put on a good face.

Standing up, your joints ached from the prolonged position they’d been in for who knows how long. You winced slightly, quickly flicking on the bedroom light and squinting as the harsh artificial glow from the lamp stung your eyes.

Twisting the lock out of place, you opened the door, other hand rubbing your eyes gently, trying to work your vision back into place.

“You’re not going to slam the door in my face again, are you?”

Your hand froze, falling from your eyes almost instantly.

He stood there, holding a dinner plate in both hands, and a heart attack inducing grin on his face. Not the good kind of heart attack either. But one that would surely leave you dead if you stared for too long.

Your body stilled from the shock, of once again having him so close, so close to being able to kill you if he truly wanted.

Yet all he did was stand there, smirk on his lips and brows raised in an arrogant gesture. As if he expected another crazy fit from you, perhaps you screaming ‘killer’ until you passed out from lack of oxygen.

Which didn’t sound so bad, now that you thought of it.

“I-I..” Your words stuttered out of a dry mouth, throat seemingly closing up from the pure anxiety that coursed through your body, at that very moment.

It was sort of bizarre, watching the torment of your very nightmares hold a dish of chicken casserole between his hands.

He probably doesn’t even eat chicken..

“What? Have nothing to say?” He tutted condescendingly, and when you proved to further say nothing to your defense, his boots were stepping heavily towards your quivering form in response. The sound was akin to heavy thunder, closing in on you unwantedly.

You walked backwards, until your back met the flush of the wall on the other side of the room. Swiftly, with ease, he used the heel of his boot to shut the door with a soft ‘click’, setting the plate of food down on the nearby dresser.

The odds were definitely not in your favor, as you were at the very opposite end of the apartment from everyone else, while simultaneously stuck in a small bedroom with a known killer, who happened to be blocking your exit.

Not like you could outrun him anyways.

“S-stay the hell away from me!” Your right hand came out in front of you, in some weak attempt at keeping him at arm's length. A look of amusement crossed his face, lips turning up into a blinding grin at your pathetic attempt at looking strong.

“Why should I?” He teased, tongue running a path over his bottom lip enticingly.

You didn’t answer, couldn’t, not when he now stood only inches before you, height overshadowing your own in a way that made you feel so small and weak under his gaze.

“I know it was you that night.” He drawled. You gasped, oxygen stinging your lungs as your eyes widened in shock at his bold statement, how he wasn’t even attempting to deny what had happened.

“Did you really think you could run from me?” He chuckled, shaking his head at his own words, bringing his thumb to the apple of your cheek as he pressed the pad into your skin, caressing right below your left eye.

You tensed, muscles burning in protest.

His touch felt like fire, consuming you in steady flames.

“Pathetic little human, thinking she escaped and outsmarted me.” He hummed darkly, eyes flashing with the barest hints of anger. “Sorry to tell you, but I let you go willingly.”

His words only further confirmed what you had already expected. It hadn’t just been luck on your side that night. Your escape hadn’t been an escape at all, but a chase.

He’d been toying with you the entire time.

“Why.. why didn’t you-” You couldn’t find the words to finish the sentence, not with the heavy wave of nausea creeping up on you.

He didn’t seem to care about your pained expression as he let his hand fall from your face. “Why didn’t I kill you?” He questioned with a smirk. You noticed how he seemed to question it himself, eyes flicking to your neck for the smallest second before finding your gaze once again.

“Because,” You watched in horror, pure fear, as his pupils shifted from dark onyx, to a vibrant shade of deathly red. “It’s more satisfying to play with your food.”

“That’s enough kid.”

A voice that didn’t belong to either one of you spoke out, without much emotion but full of demand. It was a gravelly, rich voice, and you knew instantly to whom it belonged to.

Yoongi.

Shifting your gaze over Jungkook’s shoulder, you spotted the older male leaning against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest in a bored manner. Yet his eyes weren’t on you, but on the other male in the room.

Jungkook’s face seemed to break out of whatever mindset he’d been in, because his eyes flashed back to their regular hue of coffee brown, with hints of gold flecks that seemed to beckon you in subconsciously.

“What do you want hyung?” His eyes remained on you even as he spoke, and you were a little shocked at the lack of respect he gave towards Yoongi, something that the older man seemed to demand from everyone that crossed paths with him.

“Step away from her Jungkook, now.”

You were so fucking confused. Why was Yoongi there? Why did he seem so calm, considering the situation? You were practically pinned to the wall by a stranger, in his eyes, and clearly freaking out.

And most importantly, where the hell were Taehyung and Jimin?

“Fine.” The younger practically spat out, taking three long steps away from you before turning around to eye the shorter man. You had to admit, you were slightly afraid for Yoongi, since Jungkook seemed to have the upper hand. Yet something told you that Yoongi could most definitely handle himself.

Your heart was still beating erratically in your chest, and you wondered silently if Jungkook could hear it. If he knew exactly how scared you were of him.

Of course he did.

“Get out of here.” Yoongi ordered in a brash tone, eyeing the younger with a steel gaze. It even made you waver a bit, sweaty palms rubbing against the front of your jeans nervously.

“Hyung..” Jungkook started, clearly not happy with being bossed around, and his time with you being cut short.

Too fucking bad, because you were ecstatic.

“Now, before I kick your ass.”

With that, the younger let out a growl that seemed to echo throughout the entire room, lips curling up into a silent snarl before shoving past the older male and leaving the room in a hurry.

He hadn’t even spared another glance at you, and even with his presence gone, you were still frozen to the same spot against the wall. You didn’t think your muscles would work even if you tried to move them.

“Are you stupid?”

To say you were shocked would be an understatement. Had Yoongi really just asked you that? You gave him a look of bewilderment, to which he ignored as he stepped into the room, yet the door remained open.

“Are you looking for trouble?” He shook his head, a breathy exhale of annoyance leaving his mouth.

“W-what? What the hell did I do?!”

His footsteps rushed towards you, until he stood in the exact same spot that Jungkook had been in moments prior. Except he looked considerably angry and irritated that you’d decided to open your mouth.

“Keep your voice down,” He demanded instantly. “And listen to me, got it? You don’t speak, I do.”

You had no other choice but to nod your head in agreement, his aura too dominant, like you’d be committing the biggest sin if you didn’t do what he asked.

“Good.” He nodded, pleased with your silent acknowledgement. “I’m not sure what you know, or saw, but I have a feeling that you know quite a lot by now.”

You nodded. What was he implying exactly though?

“Jungkook is the type to torment, and for some reason, he has his eyes set on you.”

You bit back a scoff at the clear insult, but said nothing in return. Yoongi shook his head, and you could faintly hear the loud laughs of Jimin ringing through the apartment. The small reminder of his boyfriend seemed to calm down the irritated look on his face, because it almost instantaneously softened.

Yet his words brought you back to your current situation. Type to torment? What did he mean by that exactly? Your gut was leading you to believe that the usually reserved Yoongi knew a lot more than he let on. Or maybe… knew just as much as you.

“Do you know-” You gulped. “Do you know Yoongi, that Jungkook is.. Is..”

He was silent for exactly ten seconds, staring at the wall behind your head, before he shut his eyes in a pained expression of defeat.

“Yeah.. I know.”

It was like the world instantly shrunk in on you, suffocating your lungs and chest into a breathless emotion of relief and dread all at once. Because in that moment, judging by the tone of his voice and the pitiful expression on his face, you knew nothing good would come from his next words.

“I’m the same, as Jungkook.”

You hated being right.

Words no longer existed, your brain completely shutting off from any logical thinking because now you were in a confined space with not one, but two, killing machines, and at any moment you and Taehyung, and oh god, Jimin, could all be slaughtered for a late night snack.

“Oh fuck.”

You were quick to sidestep him, rushing to the end of the bed where your bag still sat full, untouched. “I need to get the hell out of here, oh my god.”

A firm grip on your upper arm stopped you from bending down to grab the strap and book it out of the apartment. Spinning you around rather harshly, Yoongi glared at you with narrowed eyes. His grip on you was bordering on painful, yet you knew he wasn’t exuding as much strength as he could be.

“Don’t be stupid.” He spat angrily. “If you run now, he’ll just follow you. Is that what you want?”

You quickly shook your head, yet felt your own anger rising in return. “Well I’m not sticking around to let you both fucking kill me! I saw him murder someone Yoongi, and he knew I was there. He’s going to fucking kill me anyways.”

At that, his own eyes widened, as he let his grip from you fall hesitantly. “What did you just say?”

“I said, I saw him kill someone. Last night.” It was the first time you’d dared to speak the words, and it only further dawned on you just how real and terrifying the situation was.

“In the city?” You shook your head. “No, just on the outskirts. Near where I work. I live close to where it happened, and he let me get away. Why didn’t he just kill me then?”

You couldn’t believe you were having the current conversation. Your mind was still floaty and confused, as if nothing made sense anymore. Yoongi was a fucking vampire. What the hell were you supposed to make of that?

Now you had double the chance of dying, which was just great.

“Dammit.” He growled, more to himself than you. You noticed how he didn’t answer your question, and you weren’t sure if that was intentional or not.

“Are you better?” You asked pathetically small, voice quiet as you stared at him with something akin to hope.

“What are you talking about?” He asked quickly, seemingly annoyed with you for the hundredth time that night.

“Are you better… than him?”

It was surreal, watching various emotions flicker across his eyes as he took in your words. Regret turned into sorrow, which brought about a cold gaze of anger that you were used to seeing permanently etched onto his face by now.

“No.” He spoke harshly, taking a step away from you. “No, I’m not.”

/~/

The next morning brought summer rain and cloudy skies. You longed for the sun, when was the last time you’d last felt its warmth on your skin?

How long had it been, since you’d truly felt okay?

The feather comforter was molded to your body, covering every inch except for your head. In your temporary cocoon, you felt the slightest bit safe. Daylight was there once more, you could hear the faint murmurs of people talking and cars speeding by from outside the window.

Taehyung was bustling around in the kitchen, pots and pans clattering loudly as the television played softly from the living room, most likely some random show that he’d never watch. It was just useless noise.

Everything seemed useless to you.

Your inability to keep yourself and friends safe. The world you thought you once knew, was gone, completely destroyed within two days. You felt cheated and broken all at once.

Closing your eyes tiredly, your mind rushed back to last night, recalling on events that still made your pulse run rapidly with fear.

….. “No, I’m not.”

You didn’t say anything. What could you say?

“Does Jimin know?”

He shook his head. “No, never. He will never find out from anyone.” At the last word, his cold gaze zeroed in on you. You felt yourself shrink back in response.

“You won’t breathe a fucking word to him about any of this, do you understand?” He spat out. “Or I will kill you myself.”

You felt tears pool in your eyes, spirit being crushed within moments. It was only rational, for you to cry at such a threat. You wanted to sob, really. Just scream and yell until your throat ran dry and you could no longer speak. Instead, you let silent tears fall down your cheeks as you stared at him wordlessly. Numbly.

“I- I wish I’d never fucking met you. Any of you.” You brought your hands up to wipe at your face, and Yoongi seemed to cool down the venom pooling on his tongue, as he let out a sigh.

“Fuck, I- I didn’t really mean it, I’m just angry.” You scoffed, to which he ignored. “I’m just scared okay? I fucking love Jimin. I wouldn’t hurt him… or you. Alright? So stop crying.”

“You don’t think I’m scared?! I just found out monsters exist, and that one wants to kill me!”

Yoongi stood silent, until he was placing his hands on your shoulders, making you face him. His grip was gentle this time, you noticed.

“We’re not all monsters.” He spoke quietly between the two of you. “I know you think you’re crazy but you aren’t, okay? Jungkook was reckless that night, you should have never seen him.”

He sighed in disappointment.

“I know you won’t believe me when I say this, but he’s not going to kill you. So stop worrying.”

You looked at him as if he’d gone insane. Out of all the things you’d experienced over the past two days, that had to be the craziest thing you’d heard.

“Then why were you so eager to make him leave earlier?” He’d practically thrown the younger male out of the room.

“Jungkook is… complex. He doesn’t kill for sport, he has a method. He won’t kill you, so just trust me on that okay?”

Your face scrunched in confusion.

“How do you know he won’t? He was pretty clear that he didn’t like me, and I was just a game to him…”

Yoongi just shook his head, hands falling from your shoulders.

“Just trust me, Jungkook would never kill you. There’s a lot you don’t know.”

It was then that Jimin’s loud cry of laughter broke through the silence, his calls for Yoongi echoing out from the living room as he laughed along with Taehyung.

“You should go.” You whispered, stepping towards your bed.

“You shouldn’t.” He responded. “Stay with Taehyung as long as you can, I’ll talk to Jungkook.”

You nodded, because it was really all you could do.

You heard his footsteps walk towards the door, before he turned around and eyed you, an expression of desperation crossing his face.

“Please… don’t tell Jimin.”

Your heart throbbed at the pure agony shining in his eyes. It was the rawest and most open you’d ever seen him.

“I won’t, I promise.”

As if you’d ever willingly make someone suffer like that. As if you’d ever make someone feel how you currently felt.

Lost.

......

You still felt confused, and afraid. What had Yoongi meant when he’d said there was a lot you didn’t know? He had seemed so sure that Jungkook wasn’t waiting to sink his teeth into your neck at the next chance he got.

What really got you, was the fact that sweet Jimin was dating a fucking vampire.

Honestly, what type of world did you truly live in?

Yoongi had said that he would talk to Jungkook, yet about what you weren’t exactly sure. What was there to talk about anyways? Was he going to ask Jungkook not to kill you? Was Jungkook going to kill you?

A stead headache soon turned into a pounding migraine, and you groaned into your pillow in defeat. You were sick of being looked over, being left with nothing except more questions the longer time went on. There was still so much to figure out, so much to do. And you knew you weren’t going to sit around like an easy target for that stupid bloodsucker. Hell no.

If there was one thing you knew in the mess of craziness in your life, was that you wanted answers and you wanted them now.

Luckily, you knew just where to find them.

#bts scenario #bts au #jungkook scenario #jungkook au #bangtan scenarios #bts vampire au #jungkook vampire au #bts #bangtan #jeon jungkook #angst #only a little #smut will come later #jk is not bad i promise lmao #give it time

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artificialzeezee · 7 years

Text

Sorry to my unknown lover.

Summary: Based on Halsey’s song ‘Sorry’. Roy reflecting on what he won’t let himself have. Roy reflecting on his insecurities and his mistakes, and the love he let slip away before it ever began. A drabble about Roy and Shane, and what never was.

“All you are is a bastard! You could never be someone’s boyfriend because your tongue is already so far up your own asshole!”

“Real classy, Shane. Keep ‘em coming, you think I haven’t heard this song and dance before?”

“Of course you have, I just never thought we’d play it! I never thought you’d be like this to me!”

Roy didn’t enjoy arguing. No sane minded individual did, unless they had some sort of God complex- and contrary to popular belief, Roy didn’t have one of those. Roy didn’t take pleasure watching people he loved in pain, he didn’t get a kick out of tears and screaming, and he wouldn’t choose to repeat any of the dark nights where his voice went hoarse shouting, while his partner curls up in ball of self pity on the floor. For Roy, arguments had become a regular visiter, but not a friend he greeted warmly. Just an acquaintance he begrudgingly accepted. All his previous relationships ended not with a whistle, but with a bang.

How did he end up here? A Friday night, laying on the grass of his garden, staring up at the stars and letting the summer breeze whistle past his anxieties. The over grown grass blades tickling the exposed parts of his skin, the midnight blanket attempting to coo him into a blissful state of relaxation, and the hammering of his heart drumming louder and louder every second he represses the aching of his chest. He should be out on the town, breaking hearts and living the extravagant life of an L.A bachelor.

This was a normal thing he did however in times of great difficulty. He use to retreat to a field a few blocks down from where he lived as a kid when he got stressed. When his mother flipped out after finding the red dress under his bed, when his father told him about his grandfathers heart attack, and when he’d gotten into a huge fight at school after a jock called him a faggot one too many times. He coped with fresh air, and silence, letting his conflicting emotions battle it out civilly. Roy would briskly trudge up the hill, counting every breath he took on his trek, and then lay under the twinkling night sky above him. Thoughts would begin to untangle from the web like a lucky fly, and the spider that spun the dread and anger from corner to corner of his mind would eventually rest. Then he was left fragile, but tranquil. He could breath again without the pang of rage boiling at the centre of his soul. Roy watched the silver balls of fire sit still and calm in the void, and he’d imagine himself to be them.

Against all odds, the stars weren’t sucked up by the mind numbing darkness. They carried on triumphant and bright, beautiful no matter what surrounded them, and he took inspiration from them.

He came out to his family. He started performing on bigger and better stages. He got a job as a costume designer.

He won Drag Race.

Somehow he always ended up the same way, as if he was still the twig-like, trifling kid from way back yonder. Laying on grass, trying to relax his rigid, uneven breathing, and over thinking to a point he may explode like a volcano. Why did it all have to be so familiar? Why couldn’t he move on, and stop relating to the 11 year old that would scream angrily through the burning tears streaming down his cheeks, crying into the empty space of an uninhabited park.

Roy rested his hands against his chest, focusing on the way they lifted and fell in time to his breathing. He began untangling the irksome knots of his worries, but he finds himself stuck on the most infuriating, intangible thought that he wanted to avoid at all costs. How foolish was he to pretend it would simply go away with some air and concentration.

Shane. The one and only reason he was currently laying in his garden at 12:42AM, with goosebumps and a sour expression on his face.

They’d gotten into a huge fight, and it had felt like an eternity of shouting until eventually Roy stormed off, driving into the night with Shane screaming bloody murder after him. His voice became nothing but a ghostly echo, and Roy was left with an eerie silence he didn’t feel any better about. Now he was all alone, he missed Shane, even at the worst. To miss the sound of someone’s screeching, even the sound of their heart ripping apart...did that make Roy satanic, or just human?

A few weeks after he was crowned on Drag Race, he was in a club with Shane; as regular as any other night on the tear with his friend. Arms slung over one another as they merrily sang along to whatever the DJ was playing, cheeks pressed together and words tossed around with little concern for the shattering effect they may have in the light of a sober morning.

Maybe it was the smell of apples in Shane’s hair, or the sparkling in Roy’s eyes, or maybe it was the bass pounding their blood through their bodies, but something was different that night. Shane laid his eyes on Roy in a way no one ever had, and as fast as the thought even crossed his mind, Roy threw himself at Shane for a sloppy yet passionate embrace.

Blurred delights and burning loins, Shane led Roy back to his hotel. Hands nervously tugging at damn material blocking their desires, hair caught in the tight fist of a lovers rushed need; the two barely had a second to take a breath before they were under the sheets, hot and sweaty. That was their first time.

It went on for months. Shane and Roy would meet, exchange pleasantries, have a couple bottles of wine, and find themselves in a mess of the others limbs, under a shameful blanket or duvet.

Eventually, they stopped drinking wine.

Eventually, they would sleepover after having sex.

Eventually, it was a dream come true...

So eventually, Roy felt claustrophobic.

He wasn’t good at relationships. He was good at casual sex, and he was good at being a shoulder to cry on, but the idea of someone depending on him, or his darkest, most vile secrets being shared with another person, scared him. Whole heartedly petrified him - spine tingling, hair standing up on his arms, sweat dripping down his forehead terrifying. Then there was the worst point of all, that this wasn’t just some yank he’d picked up at a bar, but it was one of his best friends.

And deep down, Roy knew he was falling in love with Shane, despite all the guards and walls he built up around him.

It was the most disgusting, despicable sensation to realise he was falling in love with Shane. It wasn’t the first time he’d been in love, but it was by far the worst, because the repercussions this time would mean tearing himself open, wounded and vulnerable. He knew so much about Shane - facts engrained onto the flesh of his brain, like his birthday or his best memory growing up, or even his mothers favourite song. So much about Shane had become who Roy was, and he despised the codependency they had fallen into.

Watching his “boyfriend” in one of his work shirts as a nighty, cooking breakfast, shinning in the toils of the sun’s rays that leaked through the window. Listening to the angelic, carefree notes of Shane singing in the shower. Watching him beam with pride when he made Roy laugh. Shane had, unfortunately, become Roy’s favourite pass time, but he wasn’t overjoyed by the soft glow of new love.

Commitment-phobe. That’s what Danny had jokingly tossed at Roy when he told him about his hatred for relationships. Who was Danny to talk anywho? The boy who wrote songs about fake falling in love with a stranger on holiday, and ending every relationship he had before they got too intense. Danny was a commitment-phobe just as much as Roy probably was.

But, he was young. Roy couldn’t afford to keep jumping out of bed every time things got serious.

He didn’t want to be alone, not in a long shot! It was just, love was never a sure thing. Love wasn’t an unbreakable bond, and relationships could crumble and end in tragedy when placed upon the wrong person. Roy felt that he was the wrong person, and Shane was not. Shane was kind, and bright. Shane was warm, and loving, and had a whole world to offer a person. How could grumpy, workaholic, narcissistic, pessimistic Roy even think about taking that world away from someone who truly deserved Shane?

So he started missing phone calls. He stopped sleeping over the now infrequent times they hooked up for sex. He stopped putting in the effort in an attempt to distance himself and save the friendship he cherished.

*Tap, tap, tap.*

Roy sat bolt upright as the sound abruptly shook him from his thoughts, looking toward the source. There sat his precious dog Dede, whimpering as she gave him wide, pleading puppy eyes, scratching at the glass every couple of seconds. He snickered, hiking himself off the ground to let her out.

She pounced at his legs, letting out soft yippie barks of excitement as he fussed over her, and then they were both sat back in the middle of the garden, quiet and calm. Dede snuggled up in his lap as he stroked her, recalling where his thoughts last were.

Lost. He was now thinking about how much Shane use to pamper his dogs, spoil them like they were his own, and how the two adored Shane as much as they did Roy. He recalls the time they spent all morning in bed together, the two small dogs snoring at the foot of the bed. Shane resting on Roy’s chest, their fingers linked and held against his chest. Roy can still feel the gentle pitter patter of his love struck heart against his palm, trying to break it’s way out of Shane’s rib cage.

I should never have kissed him. The most frequent thought that crosses Roy’s mind these days. Especially since the argument.

Shane had come round fuming, not even allowing Roy the chance to shut the door in his face since he had shoved his way through to the living room. His face was fresh with makeup, beautiful and soft, but nothing else he wore indicated drag. Obviously he’d rushed from a gig to get changed before bursting onto the scene.

It started with an unnerving quiet, just the intensity of Shane’s burning glare. Roy felt his blood boil just having the usually calm boy’s eyes glued to him. Then came the shouting - the horrible sound of distress coming from the most important person to Roy. He never had the strength to stop it however. Rather, a demonic part of him deep, deep down wants Shane to keep shouting; till his lungs burst; till all the days end and there’s no longer a life to fight against. It’s the flight part of his fight, that would rather Shane tier himself out of this “relationship” as apposed to Roy putting in the effort to be with someone he fits with imperfectly.

It’s a good thing, not to be perfect. Roy’s a little crooked and Shane’s a little bent out of shape and they fall together like two different puzzle pieces, miraculously working, despite the picture.

“What did I do to you, Roy? We were so good for so long, and then you stopped-”

“We? What are you even talking about, Shane! We were never a thing, and you know it!”

“How can you stand there and lie to me? Lie to yourself?!”

“You were nothing but a good fuck, okay? Why do you have to kid yourself and pretend this was more than it was? We’re two adult, single, men, who were lonely, and wanted sex. That’s it! That’s all this ever was, Shane.”

He’s lying. They both know it, like the markings on the back of their hands. Shane can see the desperate attempt at escape that Roy leaves exposed within the twinkle in the iris of his eyes.

“Stop playing the gobby, no feelings cunt you put on for everyone else. I know you, Roy. I know the real you, deep down-”

“Ah, what a load of bullshit. What you see with me is what you get. Sorry to disappoint you, Shane.”

“No, I’m not just a pretty face. I’m smart and I see exactly what is going on here. I’m not some sex toy you can discard when you’re done with me, especially with you, of all people! My best fucking friend, that’s who you are. So don’t you dare tell me I don’t know you, and don’t you dare pretend what we had was nothing!”

It went on for more than an hour. Roy threw his fist at the wall, Shane pounded his palm onto the coffee table, both ended up exhausted and no where nearer to an ending. Shane knew all their late night conversations meant more to Roy than he was letting on, but he also knew how unbearable the pain of unrequited love felt, and how at his age it just wasn’t worth fighting for. If it was anyone else, Shane would have given up. If it wasn’t his best friend - his rock to confine in - he would be home asleep, a little broken, but relieved.

Roy remembers cocking his jaw, slick with a sleazy smirk that would infuriate anyone who saw it. He remembers laughing mockingly, in time to the music of Shane’s shattering affections. He remembers when things got violent and both began hurtling insults back and forth, for no particular reason other than to hurt the opponent.

When would it end? It didn’t seem like either was going to get their way. Shane wasn’t going to walk away in a relationship and Roy wasn’t going to leave with a best friend. They would both end up angry and alone.

“All you are is a bastard! You could never be someone’s boyfriend because your tongue is already so far up your own asshole!”

“Real classy, Shane. Keep ‘em coming, you think I haven’t heard this song and dance before?”

“Of course you have, I just never thought we’d play it! I never thought you’d be like this to me!” Shane screamed, the foundation of his makeup unable to cover the burning red of his cheeks. “Why are you incapable of real human compassion? Huh?! You couldn’t just let us develop like we were, you had to be a prick! God, do you even realise how mean you can be? I mean for God sake, you kissed me all those months ago, not the other way round! You’re the one who started this...” Shane stopped, his chest struggling to keep up with his breath as he tried to settle the racing of his heart. “You’re the one who kissed me.”

I should never have kissed him. Roy cursed under his breath, a hand pushing through the tufts of his hair. “I know.” he whispered, to himself and to Shane. “I know. I never should have-”

“No, don’t take that moment away from me. I’m glad you kissed me.”

They’re on opposite ends of the living room, staring at each other, with less rage and more pity. Roy was broken. Shane was broken. Everything about them and between them was breaking. Roy wants nothing more than to hold Shane, rest a hand on his cheek and apologise till he’s used up all the words within him, and he’s contently mute. He wants to be able to love Shane without the fear burning away inside him, but the anxiety is too much. He’s convinced Shane could do so much better, and he’s convinced it’s written that he must spend his days alone. Shane believes in love, Roy believes in realism.

Roy grabbed Shane by the wrist. He dragged him out of the house, locked the door and got in his car, alone. Shane shouted for him to stop, pounding on the car window, begging him to resolve whatever it was he was missing. Roy just looked at Shane through the glass and sighed.

“Someone will love you,” he said, too quiet for Shane to actually hear against his persistent shouting, “But that someone isn’t me.”

He drove away, from his own home and from his dying love. He drove toward the unknown and the lonesome future.

Dede began to stir in her slumber, and before Roy could pick her up she jumped off his lap, scuttling back to the house. He watched her, smiling warmly despite the agonising twisting off his stomach. So many self destructive thoughts to match self destructive actions.

The stars glimmered high above, singing against the silent audience of darkness. Roy fell on his back again and just stared at them, in awe, hoping they would tell him what to do next. Such grace and beauty, dancing above for all the see but never to touch. He’d burn up the very second he lay the tip of his finger on them, and right now when he felt so conflicted and nauseous, it was exactly what he wanted. To become the shimmering star dust within the cosmos, with no problems and no feelings. Just a stunning chain of lights, free and admired.

It had been a day since the argument. It felt like a battle that had extended for years, the way his throat was tightening; reflecting on Shane’s depressed pleads and his distressed screams, pulling Roy down under and filling his lungs till he drowned in the same feelings. Why couldn’t he just accept love? Why did he have to run for the hills?

He could spend all his life analysing and still never come up with a clear answer. Childhood trauma, fear of abandonment, some other bullshit answer- Roy didn’t want to find answers as to why he wouldn’t, he just wanted to know how to unapologetically love Shane. To love him without the compulsion to back peddle, and to give him the undying, obsessive, proud love Shane truly deserved.

“I’m making it harder than it fucking has to be.” He spoke quietly to himself. “This is...fuck, why can’t I believe that anybody ever really starts to fall in love with me?! Why am I...” He grunts, slamming his head down against the grass and squeezing his eyes shut as he settles the rising anger. “fuck.”

The longer he lay watching the stars, the longer he’s depriving himself of a blissful future in the arms of his very real love. The longer he lets his hot headed nature be the dominant feeling, the longer he is without carefree, tender intimacy.

“What was I to you then, Roy? Tell me- tell me right now, because I know I wasn’t just sex and you won’t convince me otherwise.”

“Then what the fuck is the point in me saying anything, you’ve already decided on the answer!”

“Are you telling me all the mornings we spent talking about our lives, stark naked, unable to take our hands of each other, was nothing? Because it didn’t feel like nothing. It felt like everything!”

“You can’t just enjoy the bullshit. You have to ruin a good thing by putting thought into it-”

“Me ruin it?! You’re the one who started screening my calls, ignoring my texts! You’re the one who tried me on like a piece of cheap jewellery and threw me away! If you thought I’d just shrug and move on without a second glance back, you’re not as intelligent as I figured you were.”

“You’re use to being an over sized flesh light anyway, why are you-”

Shane threw himself at Roy, slamming him against the wall and screamed every crude insult he could think off. Roy shouted back, practically spitting, clenching his fists at his side.

It was ugly.

It was heart wrenching.

Why? Why did Roy ruin such a good thing, why did he destroy the one person who meant more to him than anything ever had?

When he was a kid, watching the stars use to do him a world of wonder and clear up the web of worries cluttering his thoughts. Now, in his 40s, it did nothing but leave him cold and star struck.

Should he call Shane? Or, was it simply too little too late? It seemed their fait was sealed; his ignorance had broken Shane’s heart, and he failed to see it at the beginning till he tore Shane up at the end.

#bitney #rpdr fanfiction #fic #(A drabble that ended up being almost 8 pages...)#first of my one shots done (i feel nervous to post...not sure why........)

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wastedwishesandhope · 7 years

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Denouement

The words slipping on his lips bounced between the walls inside the bedroom. As if his words are breathing and trying to escape from the possible reality he was revealing. The resonance crawl into his skin, the wavelength of his voice breathes through his ears. He was not shouting but when Kim Taehyung’s words registered to his head, it seems like he was talking with a megaphone. It was so loud and deafening.

A bubble finally broke and Jimin sees light after the decades of darkness. Without any word, he stormed out of his loft and he’s gone into the thin air, not even CCTV camera’s caught his movement. Park Jimin was gone just like the ashes in the air.

He didn’t make a motion or sound but he’s already driving his car out of the building parking lot. His mind was too preoccupied with all the questions. Tons of profound emotion was one by one coming out from his senses. His grip on the steering wheel tightened and the blood on his veins rushing through his entire body like an uncontrollable current of a flooding river.

He knew it, there’s still a possibility for an explanation of this ruined destiny. The whole universe conspiring against them and he can feel the jealousy which trying to beat the bonded force between of an angel and his princess.

His jaw clenched with the thought of his past love. The unforgettable blithesome memory. The wrecked lover who contains the curses they were suffering till now. The owner of the nightmares who had ruined the written love story that was meant for them. Park Jimin feels like his anger would explode anytime soon. The fear, anxiety and jittery were trying to build up on him to take him down. It was very disturbing and it’s getting on his nerves.

The possibility of what Kim Taehyung said has given him a percent of light and hope that maybe, there’s still a chance to change their storyline and proceed with the happy ending he was praying for decades. The happiness he was hoping for a hundred of years.

Tonight, he sped up till he gets back to Daegu. He needs answer and clarity. He needs to patch up the stamped on holes of history from the past.

What really happened?

How did Anna get the ring?

How is she connected to Wangbi?

Who she really is?

Who is the Anna he’s been loving and wanting all this time?

Is it still possible to be with her?

Would the universe let him love this princess? The kind of unforbidden love?

— — —

It was almost midnight when he pulled over to a deafening silence of a cemetery. The wind blows gently, the moonlighted the dark ground and the grass was patiently waiting to be stepped on.

Park Jimin gets off from his car and took a deep breath, trying to soothe his throbbing chest with the chilly breeze of the night.

He knows what he will do will cost much of his strength and ability, and he’s not sure if his weak human body could take in the pressure and intense energy he will be using this night. Nevertheless, he’s hoping for the best, secretly hoping the nosy universe would let him know the truth. This is the only way, and he don’t care even if it would take his own life.

He started walking through the grassy field. With heavy steps and heavy breaths, as soon as he got closer to the grave, he feels a huge rock was being put down between his taut shoulders. He most likely dragging his feet, pushing those legs to move, to keep on walking towards the truth. Towards his death.

He stopped in front of the grave. His whole body is trembling uncontrollably. His hands feel cold, his knees feel weak. He bit his lips. He’s just one step away from the truth. Finally, he got the courage to face the truth. The truth he was escaping from the very beginning. The pain he was avoiding. Even now, he’s hesitant with his self, if he’s really ready to know what happened back in the days he left Wangbi.

The battle inside his mind has started. He feels being hit with a stone. He’s enduring the pain, but what more when he slowly digs in within the truth? The wind blew again, and it's like whispering to go forward. To have a brave heart. To finally accept that he’s no coward, he’s just a poor soul abused with the mischievous destiny.

Jimin closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. Feeling the nature around him. His senses spark up.

He can hear the grasses dancing through each blow of the night.

He can smell the burning ashes of the broken bones died with fright.

He can see with his closed eyes the darkness of the realm world of the dead,

and he can feel the warm light of the moon on top of his head.

His eyes shot opened.

The white rings occurred on his pupils like the moonlight, and he breathes as if in a fight.

Park Jimin opened his mouth and lifted his right hand, he then let his fangs nailed on his skin, biting it till the thick blood flow on his ivory skin. He kneeled down on the ground, in front of the grave and stretched his arms to let his blood drop on the grass and waited till the soil swallows it.

He tightly closed his eyes again, pushing his self to the edge till his strength overflowed and he can accomplish his goal for this night. When the force was too heavy, he felt his sweating cold and he felt his limb froze. His hands dropped on the grass and insides of him were starting to throb. His running out of breath but still focus on what he wants to know.

After a few seconds, like an old tape being played in the movie theatre, a series of events has flashed in his eyes. His eyelids shutter open and he can no longer see his surroundings. He looked around. There he realized his mind was back to that night he’s most scared of.

His heart pounded abnormally when his eyes landed on the crying woman lying on the cold floor of somebody’s room. She was screaming in pain. Shouting for help. The bump in her stomach was telling him she was pregnant and was about to give birth anytime soon.

“Wangbi…”

The sweet memories of her were thrown against him. Her smiles. Her voice. The sound of her laugh. The way how his name formed on her lips.

Park Jimin bit his lips watching the helpless woman he loved. She was holding onto something to get rid of the pain. After a few seconds, an old woman entered the room with a basin in her hands. She was the old woman he killed before. She was the body buried in the grave. She’s the one who has most memories of her before Wangbi died.

The old woman knelt down and massages the bare belly of Wangbi. She kept telling her to push through before she spread her legs more and went under the cover. Wangbi once again screamed on top of her lungs. Tears stream down her cheeks. She was soaking in her sweat. She looks pale and her heartbeat started to beat slowly.

“Wangbi please… once again. Push!” The old woman yells again.

Wangbi cried helplessly as she bit her lips and put all her energy to push through. Jimin couldn’t bear the sight. Tears came out of his eyes. He felt regretful that he wasn’t there when she needed him the most. Watching her in pain feels like a suicide. He can’t imagine how much pain she endures alone. He couldn’t do anything but to watch the past. To shamelessly just watch her dying while giving birth to her child.

“One last. Just one last push Wangbi and it will be done. You can do it.” The old woman pleads again.

Wangbi choked in her tears. She looked up still crying. “I— I don’t think I can make it. I— I’m t— tired,” she weakly said.

Jimin just remained standing at the corner of the room. Watching in pain.

“For your child. Please Wangbi. If you won’t push one more, the baby might die.” The old woman said, shaking.

Wangbi holds onto the bed sheets. She closed her eyes and screamed all her energy. After a few seconds, the sound of a crying baby has rung inside the room. The old woman immediately wrapped it in a blanket. She then looked at Wangbi, letting the mother see her newborn baby.

“Your baby is a girl. You have an adorable daughter, Wangbi.”

Park Jimin felt his body became weak by just looking at the baby. He knew it.

That baby is Anna.

Wangbi cried again when the old woman put the baby on her chest. She looked so exhausted but her smile was enough to tell that it’s all worth it. She held her baby dearly on her weak hands. She was crying in pain and happiness while staring at her beautiful face.

“I’ll name her Hana… because she’s my number one and will be my only one. And Hana also means flower. She'll grow and will bloom like a beautiful flower, everybody will love her.” Wangbi said crying.

The old woman smiled and said, “It was a beautiful name.”

Wangbi’s body suddenly shakes intensively, her head thrown back at her pillow and the baby almost fell from her chest that the old woman had to be so quick to catch it. Her body was in shock and her heartbeat was dropping.

“Wangbi! Wangbi! What’s going on?!” the old woman panic and she immediately put down the baby on the side to help the trembling body of Wangbi. She was choking and her lips were shaking. Wangbi can’t breathe and she was getting attacks. She was crying but she couldn’t feel her limb.

The old woman quickly checks her pulse rate. “Oh dear Lord, this can’t be happening. Wangbi!”

The young mother tried opening her mouth to compose a word, fighting her convulsing body. Her eyes opened widely. Her both arms and legs stretch as if she was being tied down. Her body won’t stop from intensive shakiness and the oxygen was blocked through the airway. Tears rolling down her cheeks. Albeit her trembling lips, she still forced herself to speak.

She choked and breathing heavily. “P— P— Park J— Jimin…”

The old woman tried holding her head up, terrified of what will happen to her. “What?” she asked.

“I— I n— need him…”

Jimin froze on his feet. He clearly heard how her heart stopped beating. How she stopped breathing. And how the last thing she had in thoughts was him.

Her body stopped from shaking. Her eyes closed, and one last tear fell from her eyes.

Park Jimin watched the light fade out of her eyes. Her body growing cold and stone.

The old woman couldn’t help but to just cry, along with the innocent whimper of the child lying next to her dead mother.

He couldn’t stop the pain. Watching her dying. Hearing her last words. Wanting to see him for the one last time. He couldn’t bear the sight of the child who wasn’t even able to see her mother. To experience the warm love of a mom. Just the thought she was orphan right after she was born was killing him.

Like a black hole sucking anything that’s near to it, Jimin was sucked back in front of the grave. Alone and weeping. This was only the start of unraveling the truth, but he feels like he couldn’t take all of it anymore.

He grips into the grass, letting his emotions poured down between his fingers. It looks like he has been shot numerously, to torture him, to take in the pain, to let him feel all the grievous suffering she endures all by herself.

Every single second he shared with her passed across his mind. He couldn’t make the tears stop, and all his regrets about when he didn’t see her when he could have kept jumping out at her making him feel guilty. He could not comprehend that she was really gone. Never again would he see her all happy and giggly. Never again would she call his name out whenever she feel like it just to get a rise out of him. She’d never smile. He couldn’t comprehend that she wasn’t still in there, and this wasn’t just a sick joke. In his mind, he kept seeing her open her eyes.

He remember what the old woman told him before he killed her.

"I've seen her cry. I've witnessed how she died. I heard her last breaths calling your name, but you’ve never came."

He shed tears with the thought of her. “I— I’m sorry… I— I’m so sorry, Wangbi.” She died wanting to see him but that simple wish wasn’t even granted. She was robbed to get happiness in her last breathes.

It took him minutes before he calmed his self. He leisurely took his time staring at the starry night soothing his burned inner self. He reminisces those days he was still with his first love. That genuine happiness he felt from the very first human being who showed him nothing but a pure love.

Park Jimin composed his self again, ready to seek for the questions left. He concentrated again and right after he closed his eyes, he was back to that night when Anna was born. He saw Wangbi's cold body lying on the covered floor like she was just sleeping. The old woman was carrying the baby in her arms, still both weeping. Just the difference was their reason of crying. One from her innocence, the other one was from grief.

The door abruptly opened. A strange man suddenly went inside. He stopped midway and looked at the body of Wangbi. He seems shocked from what he witnessed but was taken aback with the noise of the crying baby.

“Who are you?” the old woman asked and shifted her body like he was hiding the baby. The man didn’t answer, but the look on his face was telling them that he was scared of something. Without a word, he suddenly grabbed the baby from the old woman.

“What are you doing?! Give back the baby! Who are you?!” she screamed but the strange man remained terrified and nervous.

Park Jimin looked closely on his face. His jaw tightened and his fist clenched when he realized it was the father that Anna grew up with. It was the face he saw on her phone screen wallpaper.

The man took off with the baby and the old woman left in panic not knowing what to do.

Jimin fell back sitting on the grass. He read the name of the old woman written on the tombstone.

“Yoon Jeong-hee. . .”

Jimin leaned back and looked up at the sky. “Thank you for being there when she’s alone. . . and I’m sorry that you had to die in my hands. I am truly shameless.”

He stood up and bowed to pay respect before he left.

— — —

Park Jimin pulled in front of an apartment building. The whole street is silent, only light posts remain awake, and the machine of his car was left ramping the silence. He gets off from his car and looked up to see her apartment unit. Anna was obviously sleeping already since the room is dark and there’s no light left on. In just a matter of milliseconds, Jimin was already standing inside her bedroom.

She was sleeping soundlessly and she looks calm. He walked across the room and stood beside her bed. It feels century since the last time he gets to see her, this closely. He missed her, and every bit of him was aching for her.

He watched her and studied the science of her innocent face. The lines of care and toil had smoothed and virtually disappeared, the crows feet round her eyes now but a memory. Eyelids closed against the dim light of moon and her breathing deep and relaxed, all muscles in her face and body were totally at peace, like a baby in its first throes of slumber and before REM kicked in. not a twitch, not a spasm, barely any movement of her breast rising and falling with each intake of air such was the depth of her oblivion. This was a body totally at peace, at rest, at one with itself, rejuvenating the mind and muscles before the onset of yet another day. The innocence of her face remains ever since she was a baby till now she was the bloomed flower that her mother promised her to be.

He smells the strong scent of her blood, and once again he craves for it. Like a coffee aroma, it’s alluring him. The white ring returned back in his eyes. Park Jimin holds his self tightly with his hands in his arms. He’s controlling his self. He’s too weak and he knows her blood would be a great help, but his conscience has been telling him that it’s not the right thing to do. He can never kill the woman she loves. He turned his back to her. He looked around the room and his eyes landed on the phone and the ring sat on top of her side table. He walked silently close to the table. He picked up them both. The phone on his left hand, whilst the egg-shaped ring holder on his right hand.

He turned on the phone and there he sees the image of the man who abducted the baby ‘Hana’. Park Jimin closed his eyes again and focused his self on getting what he wants. Trying to get back to the past that this image contains. It was his first time doing this and he’s not sure if he can make it. It’ll be more hard and dangerous, getting the memory of someone without any possessions that belong to them.

When he opened his eyes, his pupils dilated. He looked around and he was standing in front of Wangbi’s house gate. He saw this man again, waiting outside. He knocked four times till the door opened. It revealed the all ethereal beauty of his first love, yet the look on her face shows how she was so anxious with this man. Park Jimin examined the overall clothing of this strange man and there he realized it was a Korean soldier.

“What are you doing here again? I told you, you won’t get anything out for me!” Wangbi said sounds so tense. She looked around to make sure that no one’s watching them. The Korean soldier seems so relaxed.

He smirked which make her rapid heartbeat. “Continue denying it. I guess you will stop concealing the existence of this monster once he’s shot dead, miss.”

She gulped. Her hands were trembling.

“We got evidence and he’s not even under of any jurisdiction since he’s not one of us. He’s no human but a monster. If ever we will kill him, no laws would fight for him. He’ll be like a virus that will be gone and no one will remember he ever existed. So if I were you Wangbi, stop hiding that monster and turn him in.”

Wangbi bravely blocks the door and looked at him with stern expression yet it’s obvious how scared she was.

“Don’t do this please… he don’t intend to harm anyone in this town. Let him live like he’s a normal person! Please don’t do this. What do you want? Name your price and I’ll give it to you. Just let him alive,” she pleads with crack voice.

The man showed a smug smile as he checked her out from head to toe which sends shiver down her spine. Park Jimin wanted to smack and kill this person but it was too late for that.

“You know what I want from you, Wangbi. You know what I want even before. . . right?” then he grins.

His grip on the phone tightened and it cracked a glass. He has to keep his self calm but he wants to kill somebody just to let out his anger.

The next thing he knew, he was inside of an isolated cabin with wooden walls and hanging light bulb. He can hear someone’s whimper as if it was being tortured or in pain. The voice was crying but it obviously doesn't want to make any sounds. Park Jimin turned around to follow where the voice was coming from. Anger radiated from him like fire. He cracked his knuckles, menacingly.

He saw Wangbi crying under a naked man who pleasurable thrusting in and out of her. Her wrists pinned down and she can’t scream for help. She looks tired and the crack on her sobs telling him how many cries she did. Her voice inside her mind keeps shouting Park Jimin’s name. Just like before she died, she was needing him. Hoping he would come out and let this entire stop. But no, he never shows up and he let this man raped her mercilessly.

Park Jimin could imagine murdering thousand of humans. He can imagine blood flowing on his hands. He wanted to kill someone. He wanted to avenge her. But everything was too late. He no longer could kill someone’s who’s dead already. He realized after she was raped, that’s when Wangbi stopped showing up to him. He knows it’s because he will find out what happened to her. The reason why she don’t want to see him ever again was because it might be dangerous for him. A lot of people wanting to kill him, and this Korean soldier were one of them. Wangbi let herself be the payment in exchange for his freedom and life.

She protected him, instead of him protecting her. He’s no longer entitled being called as her ‘angel’.

He immediately put back the phone on top of her night table. He no longer could take seeing those gruesome memories of the true monster after what he did to Wangbi.

He stared at the ring he’s holding in his right hand but he suddenly felt weak that he almost fell on the floor. He used too much of his strength, but he just can’t stop here. He needs to find out everything. He tried composing his self and focuses all his attention on the memories he could get out of the ring, but a pain sheeted through him with a terrible intensity. The flesh wound on his hand oozed blood and his entire right hand wore a purple- yellow smear of bruise from his fangs. It hurt so bad that he could hardly negotiate the raw bedroom that strobed in and out of focus all around him.

He took a deep breath once again and remained his self focused.

He closed his eyes and when he opened it again he’s in different setting again. He once again saw this man but he’s inside of a familiar bedroom. Jimin tried to remember where he had seen this and when his eyes caught an old portrait, he realized it was Wangbi’s bedroom. He had been here once before. The Korean soldier who’s holding the baby in his arms looked around before walking closely to one of the cabinets near the bed. Jimin saw how he stole the ring and quickly leave as soon as he got it.

The setting was changed again to somebody’s home. There he knew that this Korean soldier is married and has two children, yet he still has the audacity to rape Wangbi and cheat on his wife.

Park Jimin witnessed how he changed the baby’s name from ‘Hana’ to Anna since they have decided to migrate to America and it will be the best to change the baby’s name to something sound foreign.

He also sees how this monstrous man asked that the ring should be inherited to Anna, and that’s when she got it.

The pain once eating him from the inside. He fell on his knees as he tried to put pressure on his chest, and his stomach. He crawled to put back the ring on the side table and tried to stand up on his feet. He made a low growl again, straining to stand up to the pain. He tried dragging his feet to walk across the room but every movement sent ripples of pain through his stomach, chest, and hand. His body was too weak from what he did and the smell of Anna’s blood wasn’t helping him either.

He was alarmed when he felt Anna shifted, he quickly moved till he’s already outside the glass door and standing on the terrace. He felt the bubbling blood in his stomach. He coughed and his hands were bathed in his blood. He quickly covered his mouth when he felt that he’ll throw up in any seconds of blood.

He looked back for one last time to see her sleeping then in just a blink he’s already inside his car. He grunted in pain again, and grabbed the door handle. When he adjusted his position in the seat, he felt fresh pain sear across his stomach. A harsh half- stifled yell came out.

He was panting already and he felt dizzy. He rests his head against the window and looked up to see her apartment unit. He saw the curtain draw close, that’s where he knew he woke her up.

I hide my tears when I say your name,

but the pain in my heart is still the same.

Although I smile and seem care- free,

there is no one who misses you. . .

more than me.

#JiAnna Jimin Anna

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