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#i didn't even read the interview yet
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spending my whole life trying and trying and trying and trying to be good enough for people who don't give a fuck about me
#im so tired living seems pointless why am i doing this what is the reason#the firm i work at is going thru a merger so it's releasing all the interns except 2#i went into her office and said that id like to stay here bc my dad said so bc i got in cause he was friends with the head#and she said ill think about it based on performance ive not decided yet#and this other guy he went in to tell her that cool he'll leave and she told him that she was hoping that he'd stay#he literally does nothing but play games on his phone he doesn't work at all#i have no idea what he has that i don't#but just. im stuck like this forever right never ever good enough for people i like or care about#not for parents they have a diff fav child not for ex gf not for bestie who has a boyfriend much better at loving her than me#not for that one guy who rejected me in interview bc i don't read the newspaper and didn't know the date of the finance act#im so fucking sick of this i never even wanted to this fuckinh course and obviously even my best isn't enough and ofc im not good enough#for anyone in this field and ill just struggle and struggle and struggle all my life just to earn some fucking money so i can live away#from my sociopathic parents#and the worst part is that i can't stop feeling like maybe it IS me yk maybe i am the problem maybe im not trying hard enough#but how else am i supposed to handle this i prioritize my studies and lose all my friends i prioritise my friends and fail in d#exams#and the trauma keeps on coming every fucking day bc sociopathic parents but i jsut push it down and say not rn i will cry at night anx then#never cry#i wish someone would just tell me that idk you're wrong you're not made for this you really do have some mental illness and you're really#trying your best and do something that's easy and that you love doing#oh god this is now a ventpost#mes
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So I was literally just telling my friends about how excited I was for this newsletter that I assumed was going to drop tomorrow morning, and when I got home an hour later and refreshed my email I saw the newsletter and I got to hyped. OMG. the world is wonderful
#personal#utdr newsletter#I have so much to say about it.... i am sorry to my followers who do not care... I am so sorry#this is when I emerge and go crazy about everything. Like the royal guards comic#and the fact that gigi ships soriel and was the one that created the toriel slippers and now they are real. wear them on your feet. now#and the papyrus valentine letter gif with the dog.#Fangamer if you're reading this please send toby fox and gigi and chess and temmie free slippers#also the way toby said “I'm including chess in this one now. Chess come here” implying that they are all just in the same room was so funny#and somehow also heartwarming? like they're all just togetheri n person???/ I need more friends omg#yes I will be a bit unhinged about minor details. The year of the bunny and the year of the dragon....#I got so excited about it all that I didn't even finish reading it just yet. I got to ice skate and had to come here to scream into the voi#Thank you gigi. your game looks very cool! I'm going to listen to the soundtrack soon as well. It is super duper cool amazing actually that#they said they wanted to learn to make music in the interview and then right after it is the soundtrack that they made. Amazing#inspiring. showstopping. Also the thing that they yelled “YEAAAH” about. what are our theories. my instant guess was a ship related thing#like maybe noelle and susie confirmed? but idk#and gigi's concept art for chapter 3???? tv time#okay that's it for now and I will add more late when keep reading and going insane teehee. I still haven't even read all of the valentine'#cards yet.
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dilfl0v3rss · 4 months
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NEED more boxer!todo smut maybe one where reader is jealous of the fan girls ???
yes yes yes yes yes yes yessssss!!!!
you loved your boyfriend more than anything. he was caring, respectful, loyal, and most of all, he wasn't afraid to express his love for you. whether it be in an interview or literally in a middle of a match todo always made sure to let people know he belonged to you. though this was true, there always seemed to be those sex-crazed fans that saw your man as nothing but a piece of meat. eyeing him at every angle, just waiting to pounce on him when you're either not around or not looking. todo always told you not to worry about these women, but how could you when he'd do barely anything to keep them in check?
you were accompanying todo at yet another meet and greet, fixing up his locs into a much better bun than whatever he threw it in earlier as your beefy boyfriend sat uncomfortably in his seat. "wanna go the fuck home" he mumbled as he boredly watched the hundreds of girls scream their heads off at the entrance. your hand moved towards the back of his neck, plucking him lightly before lecturing him. "watch your mouth, these people are dying t'meet you and this how you repay them?" todo sucked his teeth in front of you, earning him another pluck on the other side of his neck as you moved in front of him, blocking his view of the entrance as you stood between him and the table. "ow! cmon mama, we both know that we rather be in the bed right now" the smirk on his lips already let you know what he was implying as he outstretched a wide hand on the plump of your ass, squeezing the fatty flesh as he peeked past you towards the door.
you quickly slapped his hand away, giving him a warning look as you began to move towards where the rest of his team and security were standing. "behave" you mouthed before both of your attention was brought to the swarm of screaming women moving towards the table. todo internally rolled his eyes at the sight in front of him. in his eyes he didn't understand why these women acted like this, never really paying attention to how he looked when he fought. you, on the other hand, understood completely. from his tight jawline to the sight of his sweaty, glistening body. you knew your man was fine, but that didn't mean you enjoyed when these women would act like this.
"oh my goshhhhh a.t please sign this!!!" the first girl yelled, practically shoving a picture of him in his face. he internally sighed at her behavior, his hand moving towards the picture before quickly signing his initials on it and giving it back to her. "there you go. loved that fight by the way, think i handled my business well. whatchu think about it?" the girl stood in embarrassment as she looked around the room, not having a clue in the world about what fight he was talking about since she probably got the picture from a random site online. todo turned towards you, a small smirk creeping on his lips as the girl quickly walked away. you couldn't help but laugh as you instantly thought back to the fight he was talking about. it happened to be the same fight you gave hime a little something in his dressing room before he went out.
the next group of woman to come up were much calmer, all wearing white t shirt with todo's face in the middle of a heart. of course they tied the backs of them, making their breasts nearly burst through the fabric as their one size too small miniskirts sat right over the bottom of their asses, they probably weren't even wearing underwear. "hi aoiii" the women said in unison, their high pitched voices making your eyes roll as the three of them leaned over the table. this time todo didn't seem as bored, his lip twitching into a smirk as he read the words on each of their shirts. the girl on his left wearing one that said "aoi", the middle one wearing one that said "is our", and the girl on the right wearing one that had a big pink "daddy" right under his picture. the sight of them made you cringe as you quietly scoffed in disgust.
"well this is new" he said with a chuckle, making the girls giggle as well. their breasts bouncing in their tight shirts as they basically eye fucked your boyfriend right in front of you. "we're such big fans todo, really!" the girl on the left said as she batted her long lashes at him. "yea we've been t'nearly every match!" "n'when we couldn't get tickets we'd watch you on tv!" the other two followed, leaning closer towards him on the table as he kept that dumb smirk on his face. "well i appreciate that ladies, i could tell y'all are big fans" you were getting irritated now. your nails digging into your palms as you watched the girl in the middle hand him a gift box with a bright pink bow on it, small smirks on their faces as they waited for him to open it. "want me t'open it now or later?" each of the girls quickly replied. "now!" a fit of giggles following as they watched the man slowly undo the bow.
as todo removed the lid he nearly choked on his tongue. inside the box sat three pairs of panties, each a different color which also happened to match the colors of the words on each of their shirts. the girl on the left's being baby blue, the girl in the middle's being black, and the girl on the right's being pink. his eyes widened before he slowly put the lid back on, picking up the sharpie and looking at the three woman. "w-what y'all want signed?" he said, clearing is throat after he spoke in which the girls replied almost immediately by pointing to the small line in the top right corner of the big heart in the middle of each of their shirts. of course this was also where their left breasts were located, making todo's heart nearly stop beating in his chest.
you were fuming now, feeling as if steam was being released from your ears as you watched this man, YOUR man, smile from ear to ear as he signed his name on each of their shirts. you couldn't watch the scene any longer, turning on your heals and walking towards the exit to wait for him in the car. todo didn't even notice until he heard the exit door slam onto the wall when you opened it, your back turned to him as you angrily walked away. "s'cuse me for a minute" he mumbled, getting up from his seat to follow you outside. the girls giggly attitudes were quickly replaced with sadness as they watched todo walk away as if all the things they just did meant nothing.
you were nearly at his car now, the keys already in your purse since he gave them to you when it was time for the event to start. "mama...baby where you goin?" you ignored him, continuing your search for his keys so you can just go. todo didn't give up though, walking up behind you before lightly pulling your arm around so you can face him. "what's the issue?" was he dumb? did he really not see the problem in what just went on? anger began to cloud your brain, making all your movements rougher and full of attitude as you snatched your arm from his hold and waved your hands in his face as you spoke.
"nigga are you dumb, stupid, or a complete fuckin idiot cause there's no way in hell you don't understand what the problem is" todo's face hardened at your disrespectful attitude, his jaw clenching as he stared down at you with serious eyes. "who the fuck you talkin to like that y/n? don't make me embarrass you out here." you scoffed, his words not putting a single drop of fear in your heart as you pushed your finger into his chest. "you already did that when you was in there signing tiddies and smiling all in bitches faces you hoe ass nigga. m'not finna go back n fourth wit you when i know i could have a new nigga in my bed by tonight so you can go back in there wit your little girlfriends and leave me the fuck alo-" before you knew it your view quickly changed from aoi's face to the upside down view of his lower back as he threw you over his shoulder.
"nigga put me down ion care if you a pro boxer i will fuck you up out here!"
"yeah yeah whatever you say, jus keep that same energy when we get in there."
'in where?' you thought. nevertheless, you continued slapping your hands on his back, trying to free yourself from his strong hands. before you knew it the two of you were back inside, the attention of almost every person in there on you and todo as he continued his journey to the bathroom, not paying them any mind. he became irritated with your small fists hitting his back, using his much larger hands to his advantage as he left a light tap on your ass, "cut it out ma, you only makin it worse for yourself." the three women still stood in their spots in front of his table, looks of jealousy on each of their faces as they watched you. your current state made you embarrassed as you looked at the group of girls the best you could as you hung over your boyfriend's shoulder. todo payed all of them no mind, silently walking into the bathroom and locking the door before putting you down.
as soon as he released you, you made quick work of giving him a piece of your mind as you fixed your dress in the mirror. "stupid ass nigga, now you standing there all mad at me cause i told you the truth. im not trippin over you aoi you can go be wit them bitches right now and i wouldn't bat an eye." you dug yourself into an even deeper hole as you continued to fix yourself up in the mirror, not paying the man any mind as he walked up behind you. he was close, leaving no room between your ass and his print as he dropped his lips towards your ear. "you done?" the sound of his voice made arousal rush to your core, but you feigned indifference. why was he so calm? on other days when you would get like this your boyfriend would usually entertain it, feeding into your attitudes by arguing with you, today felt different.
your gazed moved towards his in the mirror. you were going to speak, but the look in his eyes told you that maybe it was better if you didn't. the look he carried was one you've never seen up close like this before. this was the same look he had before getting in the ring with that one mouthy opponent. the same opponent that ended up getting sent flying to the other side of the ring in just the first round. so you settled for a slow nod instead, an apology already on the tip of your tongue as you felt his wide hand outstretch on your the middle of your back. "bend over f'me then" he left you no more room for arguments as he already had you bending over the sink with his hand, his eyes never leaving yours as he used his other hand to lift up your dress. "why you mad at me baby?" you opened your mouth to speak, but was cut off by the sound of his deep, menacing voice, "and before you answer that lemme remind you that ian flirt with those girls, didn't let em touch me, didn't even ask f'their names. just been polite and signed my name on their shirts so why you mad at daddy, baby?"
as you thought back to the events that happened you realized how wrong you were, you fucked up. you were so blinded by jealousy that you didn't notice how respectful your man was still being to you during the entire situation. tears began to well in your eyes, your bottom lip already trembling as an apology sat ready on your tongue. "sh sh sh, m'not hearin none of that right now. tell me why you upset" your tears escaped you as you spoke, your breathing already picking up speed as you tried to get through a single sentence without sobbing. "cause i was j-jealous" todo nodded his head at your truthfulness, freeing himself from his black jeans before lining himself up with your entrance. "and what did papa said t'do when you start feelin that way princess?"
your tears fell more frequently now, your voice quieting down almost to a whisper as you shyly told him the words he wanted to here. "said t-to talk t'you about it to avoid stuff l-like this" he nodded again, tightly gripping your hips as he slowly sunk into you. the moan you let out was sinful, the thin walls of the bathroom doing probably nothing to keep everyone outside from hearing the two of you. "auughh d-da-" "sh sh shh, you was able to remember everything you was supposed t'do, but still managed not t'do it. y'know what that means right?" you slowly nodded your head, earning you a hard slap on your ass. the stinging pain of his rough palm caused more tears to fall as your legs buckled under you. "y-yes, m-means i'm in tr-trouble"
todo hummed in delight at your compliance, one of his hands snaking up your back and into your hair as he gripped your hip firmly with his other. "m'glad you know, take what i give you and if i see you tryna run imma just go deeper, y'hear me?" you didn't even get the chance to reply before you felt every inch of his dick begin to move in and out of you at a slow pace. the sound of his hips and your ass already filling the room as you released whiney moans into the air. "m'so sorry p-papa, i didn't m-mean t'make you madddd" you whined, your hands clenching in a tight fist to keep you from pushing at his abdomen. todo ignored you, quickening his pace and strengthening his trhrusts to the point where the sink acquired a slight shake.
you knew that you wouldn't be able to last long if he kept fucking you like this, your back arched to perfection as he pulled you up slightly so you can watch him in the mirror. he quickly released your hip, moving his hand towards your chin as he made you look yourself in the eyes. "what's my name mama? say it real loud so all those girls could hear." his deep voice traveled right between your legs, your arousal only growing as he felt your essence begin to spread all over his thighs. your eyes lost their focus, nothing but your release on your mind as you began to fuck yourself back onto his dick. todo couldn't help a devilish smirk from growing on his features, your fucked out expression almost making him ease up on you, but almost wasn't enough...
the next thing you knew todo's thrusts doubled in power, his hand gripping your hair tighter as he left three hard slaps to your ass. "y'hear me pretty? say my name." he knew you could barely think right now let alone speak, but todo had a habit of pushing you past your limits. your pouty lips parted, smeared lipgloss making them shine as you forced out the name he's been dying to hear. "daddy, f-fuckkk s'daddy!" your words were followed by a plethora of moans and whines, your release on the tip of your tongue as you felt his dick kiss parts of you that could never be reached by someone else. todo just smiled, lust dancing in his eyes as he stared you down in the mirror. "s'right mama, it don't matter if a girl put it on a t shirt or on her fucking forehead. daddy only got one girl n it's you"
tears began to fall down your cheeks, your pleasure only growing as you listened to your boyfriend reassure you. at the sound of his voice your walls began to tighten, signaling to him you were about to cum. todo moved his hand towards your stomach, pushing your back to his chest as he kissed up and down your neck. "you gonna cum? gon make a mess on your dick?" you quickly nodded your head at his question, tear stained cheeks shining in the dim light of the bathroom as you moved yourself back harder onto him. "w-wan you t'fill me up daddy" todo felt himself twitch at sight of you, your low eyes and glossy lips making it hard for him to keep his orgasm at bay as he quickened the speed of his thrusts. "ill give you want you want princess don't worry, give you whatever you want as long as you listen. you gon listen to daddy now?"
you replied almost instantly with a drawn out "yessss!" making todo's heart skip a beat as he quickly connected the two of your lips. the two of you made out sloppily, not worrying at all about the noise as your release trickled out of you onto his dick. your vision began to whiten as your legs buckled from underneath you. of course aoi caught you, continuing his ministrations until he was filling you up with his thick load. as both of your breathing began to slow you slipped out of todo's arms and turned around to face him. "m'sorry for gettin jealous baby, i just don't like seein you around so many women." you shied away from his gaze, making him put a strong hand under your jaw so you can look at him as he spoke. "i know mama and i forgive you, now can we just forget this whole stupid meet n greet shit so i can go home and fuck you properly. i hate these things just as much as you do."
the two of you laughed, getting each other dressed before quietly exiting the bathroom. you were surprised to see that all of the women had left, their hopes of pulling the pro boxer being killed by the sound of the two of you fucking like animals in the bathroom.
"looks like they already forgot it"
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lightsoutletsgo · 19 days
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I’m such an angst girly omg how about lando’s phone not working and reader gets sad he’s not replying or answering her calls for a few days🤨
pairing: lando norris x reader
word count: 1.2k
warnings: angst, allusions to a panic attack, reader is v emotional, lando is an idiot ahhhh tysm for sending this in! It was fun to write but ofc I had to make it fluffy to end bc I didn't wanna make myself too sad happy reading! love mimi 🤍
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Long distance relationships were hard, you knew that before you’d even started dating Lando. You’d heard all of the stories before but like the many innocent others who had yet to experience their partner being on the other side of the world, you were determined that everything would be okay. 
Now, as you thought back to how naive you’d been, you scoffed, how could you have thought it would be so simple? If you weren’t battling with time zones, you were battling to find free time, and if you found free time, it was never quiet and peaceful and it never lasted more than a few minutes. You knew you should have been satisfied with those snatched moments you did get, but you missed your boyfriend. 
You missed him even more when he got another podium and you weren’t there to celebrate with him. You’d stayed up until stupid o’clock to watch the race live and you’d cheered and jumped as your boyfriend performed overtake after overtake to move up the grid to claim second place. You knew that once he had done his post-race interviews and meetings he would call you. You sighed as once more Lando’s contact picture flashed up with ‘facetime unavailable’. You’d scheduled this call the night before but he was only a few minutes late. You shook your head as you took a deep breath, he was probably just finishing up in meetings. Half an hour went by and your stomach twisted with worry as you still hadn’t heard from him. You checked your phone but there were no new notifications - not from him at least anyway. 
You curled up on the couch, noticing Lando’s hoodie still resting over the arm of the couch. Pulling it towards you, you nuzzled your face into it and inhaled, the smell of his cologne washing over you. You felt tears well up in your eyes. No matter how busy or tired he was, he had never once missed your call. You grew angry, not with Lando, never with Lando, but just at the situation. 
You huffed and grabbed your phone once more, deciding to doom scroll through instagram until Lando finally called. You noticed that a few people had posted new stories and so you pressed on the first one, absentmindedly tapping your screen until you paused, sitting up quickly as you realised the story you were looking at was Max Fewtrell’s. He’d posted a video in the club at a post-race party. You normally wouldn’t have batted an eyelid, but you could have sworn in the back corner of the dimly-lit club video was a figure that looked suspiciously like Lando. Going back to the start of his story and scrolling through again you realised it was Lando, wearing the black shirt you’d given him for his birthday the previous year. 
Turns out you could be mad at Lando. Something uncomfortable and hot flashed in your stomach as nausea hit you. Anger curled its way up your spine and through your chest, tightening around your lungs and making it hard to breathe. He was out at a club? And that’s why he hadn’t called you? You growled and glared at your screen, thumbs jabbing into the keyboard as you furiously typed a message to Max. He was online, you noted, as you hit ‘send’ and waited for him to read it. You barely had to wait five minutes before Max was apologising profusely and sending you a long paragraph about how he was sure Lando had texted you and would be letting him know straight away. You scoffed and rolled your eyes, throwing your phone down on the couch next to you with a ‘hmmph’. You sat in silence for a while, your emotions slowly welling up as tears gathered on your lash line. Was this how your relationship was going to end? Long nights alone while Lando partied it up on the other side of the world? Surrounded by scores of choices of pretty women and an endless supply of alcohol? You couldn’t help the way you sobbed as you grabbed his hoodie once more, desperately trying to catch your breath. You were crying so hard you almost didn’t hear the way your phone vibrated on the cushion. You gasped for air as you picked it up and turned it over, Max’s name flashing on the screen. You snatched your phone up and pressed the green button to accept, not even registering that it was a facetime call and he was going to see you crying.
You inhaled sharply as it was Lando’s worried face that appeared on the screen, he looked panicked and you could hear the music thumping in the background although slightly muffled. Despite the fluorescent lights he was standing under, he still looked good, “Baby? Oh my god…” He took in your tear stained cheeks and the way your eyes were red. He noted your sniffling noises and the way your bottom lip trembled, “Love I’m so so sorry!” You let out a laugh and rolled your eyes, trying to not let him see the next wave of tears that were threatening to fall, “Sure.” He sighed, “Honey, I promise you, I didn't mean it. I did text you! I didn’t realise it didn’t go through because I was in the post-race meeting!” “I wanted to celebrate your win with you!” Lando gently shushed you as he saw your chest heave, your breathing quickening once more, “Baby, baby, shh sh sh it’s okay, it’s okay, I’m right here.” He looked off screen for a moment to a person you assumed to be Max before the music got louder again and then quiet, as if Max had left Lando alone. You followed along with his breathing as he over exaggerated for you to copy.
“Love I promise you it was just an accident okay? I texted you to ask if you were ready to call but when there was no reply I assumed you’d fallen asleep so then I texted you to ask if you could be at the airport for 4am…” He winced, “I decided to fly home early and have a few days with you before the next race.” You melted back against the couch, hugging his hoodie to your chest as you tucked your knees up under your chin and rested your phone there, “4am?” You sniffled with a giggle, “Is that my hoodie?” He said, doing his best to distract you and you let out a proper giggle this time, “Lando! 4am is so early!” He laughed, relieved to see you feeling better, “I figured we could go for a super early breakfast and then go home and fall asleep together, in our bed, in our apartment which is my favourite place to be, with my love. Your bottom lip wobbled once more, “You promise?” He nodded to assure you, “I promise.” You inhaled deeply and let out an exhale with a sigh, “I can’t wait to see you,” your thumb gently rubbed across his cheek even through the screen. “I can’t wait to see you either love, can’t wait to be home”
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I Don't Want It Any Other Way (Mouse Series) - Max Verstappen
Summary: Y/n is the only one who manages to keep Max sane but he doesn't want it any other way
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The F1 community are divided about Max's brutal honesty. Y/n is one of the few who loves it, admires it even. The fact he's got the courage to be honest and doesn't have any intentions to apologise for it, she loves that about him.
Max steps out from the building with his trophy and champagne already handed to the team. He made sure to make a slight dig at Mercedes during his post-race interview before the podium. They had made some comments about his confidence and ability to win now the other cars had closed the gap. But he seemed to have proven himself, yet again, as unbeatable this year.
"Mouse." Max grins as he spots her waiting for him.
She'd been in the Red Bull hospitality unit during the race, watching from there instead of the garage since she had a bit of a headache earlier.
"Are you feeling ok?" Max asks in a moment of concern before he looks at her for a moment that makes her smile a little nodding at him. "The debrief shouldn't be long."
"It's ok." Y/n shrugs as he pulls off his cap and leans down to kiss her softly before beginning to lead them through the paddock. "You need to eat too."
The smirk on Max's face is not hidden int he slightest. Y/n is the most silent person he has, and probably ever will, met but the occasions she can't and won't keep herself quiet is when she feels the need to remind him to take care of himself. Not that he would forget to eat, and in fact usually it's him reminder her.
"Don't worry, mouse. We can eat on the flight home." Max states since he's already checked out the hotel and ready to fly home to Monaco. If only to get home and see his pets, especially his beloved cats.
It's not unusual for them to leave before anyone else. Beyond just being much more of a homebody who has no interest in the fame that comes with part-taking in the sport. Max likes having the domestic bliss with y/n. Plus she is still pretty quiet at home but she does talk more and she likes the freedom of not having their every action watched.
Y/n is Max’s reality. F1 is his dream. But Y/n is what he comes home with, she’ll be why he stops racing and focuses on wanting to be home with her. Hopefully they’ll have kids and he’s certain at least one of them will inherit the natural shy nature. He’ll want to be there to protect all of them, including and especially y/n.
Max goes through the debrief before heading off, saying his goodbyes to everyone before he finds y/n and smiles realising she's packed up everything in his backpack from his driver's room and is waiting for him.
Neither of them are fond of wasting time. Not that she doesn't enjoy being with him there, but she definitely loves the paddock atsmophere but sometimes the media makes things a bit too intense.
"Ready to go home?" Max asks making her nod before he takes his backpack from her to carry and then takes her tote bag which has her stuff in it.
"Ready." Y/n nods before they start to move through the building out into the paddock.
-
Unlike Max, y/n does see all the hate he gets online. She also sees that sometimes the booing and the hate at races weighs on him. He is having the best years of his career and yet people try to tear him down.
They did the same to Seb during his Red Bull dominance. Seb didn't seem to care then either.
The Red Bull golden boys are their own breed and there's no doubt that they share the same mentality of no apologising for being the winner.
"What are you reading that's getting that face?" Max asks as he finds y/n eating breakfast on the sofa with her nose scrunched as she looks at her phone.
"Nothing-Max!" Y/n gasps as he manages to snatch her phone, dropping down on the sofa and almost knocking the bowl of cereal off her lap when she rocks from his weight rocking her position.
"I told you not to read this stuff." Max sighs as he finds her looking through Twitter of all things.
"But the way they talk about you...It's not fair." Y/n murmurs while Max looks at her for a moment.
They both know it hurts her more than it hurts him, even in the small amount of upset that he might pretend he doesn't feel. He knows for y/n, she loves him and she sees him as one of the best people in the world. Even if he might disagree with that. He'll protect her from such negative criticisms of him because they upset her.
"Do you know, I love how much you care. But these people don't understand that the reason I don't care what they have to say is because I have you. You stop me from going crazy or wanting to punch them." Max states watching her look at him with those big eyes that never fail to show just how shocked she is over his words.
"Maxie..." Y/n smiles smiling almost giddy from his words before she sighs and looks at him for a moment, shifting to his lap. "I wish the world saw you the way I see you."
"I don't. It's a Mouse exclusive. Just for you." Max hums then pulling her closer. "I love you, no one else really matters, ok?"
"Ok." Y/n nods then resting her head on his shoulder. "I love you too...I still with the rest of the world loved you too."
"You're too generous. I don't want to be shared with others."
Some might be intimidated by that, in fact you'd almost expect that sort of thing from y/n, but she finds Max's honesty about his feelings with her endearingly sweet.
"I don't really want to share you either." Y/n murmurs before laughing when Max pushes her back onto the sofa and kisses her while she just sinks into the soft surface beneath her.
Being the first to leave might earn Max some hate, but he'll never care when he gets the privacy of being with the woman he loves. Just completely obsessed with her and her quiet nature that even just between them doesn't waver, but he does get to see her personality that he fell so hard for shine through brightly.
Max likes the ways things are in his relationship and in his racing career, he'd never have it any other way. But mainly he'd never want Mouse to leave because if she did, he's sure he'd go insane with the day to day life and what the media tries to throw at him. She keeps him going even if he doesn't know it.
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vashtijoy · 27 days
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have you seen the commentary from the p5r artbook going around? the shuake part of my dash is losing it a bit at the implication that their wishes were mutual!!! that seems to be what some people are getting from the commentary at least… amy insights?
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Hi! I have been through the artbook. It's great, isn't it? :D
The image above is called "One Ending", and the creator caption (by illustrator Akane Kabayashi) reads:
When I think about how Akechi's wish was to play chess after school with the protagonist, I almost want to call him out with "You liked him after all, didn't you!"
Look at that. We're told about Akechi's wish, and what it included. We're as good as told outright that he likes Joker—and this isn't the only time, there's also this:
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—There are a whole lot of things we can imagine, based on how the protagonist was depicted as someone special to Akechi. Those are more or less the exact emotions represented during Akechi's confidant. (Mumon Usuda, chief designer)
"someone special" here is 特別な存在 tokubetsuna sonzai—literally "a special presence". It means a special person, and more than that; it describes someone you find compelling, someone you can't look away from, someone who becomes one of your most important people, the centre of your world. It's another term that is often romantic, but isn't necessarily romantic.
(In the same way, I think Kabayashi's suki jan! is more tongue-in-cheek than it is a cast-iron confirmation that Akechi was canonly in love with Joker. The language there is teasing, it's ambiguous, it's baity; Kabayashi is joking. This is a rank 6—as they say, if you know, you know. But it is of course ultimately up to all of you.)
There's another mention of this image, down in the creator interview:
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Out of all the Maruki ending illustrations, it was Akechi's that stuck with me the most. It made such an impression to see them opening up as friends, having a fun, peaceful time together like high school students should. (Mumon Usuda, chief designer)
What really strikes me in all of this is the emphasis the creators put on the fact that this is Akechi's illustration, Akechi's wish. Because I've thought for a while that we know Akechi has a wish. You can see him struggling with his refusals to Maruki in the first week of January. And you can hear his wish spoken—when Maruki repeats it back to him, during the boss fight, on 2/3:
Maruki {F1 81}君たちとなら、君も過ちのない道を歩めるかも知れないじゃないか! {F1 81}-kun-tachi to nara, kimi mo ayamachi no nai michi o ayumeru kamoshirenai ja nai ka! If you're with {F1 81}―kun and his friends, you could begin to atone for what you've done! Think about it! With [Amamiya]-kun and his friends beside you, you could choose a path with no mistakes as well!
So this wish has several parts. First, there's that kimi mo, "you also"; it's tempting to read this as Maruki also wanting his new world to erase his past mistakes. Second, there's the first part, "if you're with [Amamiya]-kun and his friends". Where to even start here?
Being with Joker and the others is a prerequisite for the second half of Akechi's wish. It doesn't just coexist, it enables the rest of it. Just like his words in the engine room, "I wonder why we couldn't have met a few years earlier, [Ren]..."
Remember, Akechi's whole arc is about his rejection of trust and friendship, and his insistence on doing everything himself. This is precisely what Futaba calls him out on—"you trusted no one", or "you played life in single-player mode". This is what he unlearns at the climax of the engine room, when he realises he isn't prepared to let the others die—and follows through to save them.
Akechi is nothing without others, and he knows it. Without their support, which he believes he has no right to, he has no hope of living a better life, even were he to be given the chance—and he knows that, too. He has learned, and he has grown—and yet he knows the things he needs and wants so badly are forever inaccessible.
And his wish is about all the Phantom Thieves, not just Joker. There are many tiny references to this end—not least the original Japanese rank 10 line for his confidant, where he sacrifices himself for all of you. Joker is his compelling presence, his someone special, but he's formed small bonds with the others too, God help him.
and then there's the crime thing
The localisation frames Akechi's wish in terms of atonement, but that's not what's on offer. You cannot, after all, atone for things you never did. We see Akechi's wish put into practice, in the Maruki ending, where he appears with his friends beside him, wholly innocent and with unstained hands. And we see it in the first week of January, after he has finally met Maruki and spoken to him:
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Akechi: Ah, that reminds me—there was one more thing I wanted to tell you. Akechi: About the reality Maruki's put us in... Akechi: It seems that Okumura and Wakaba are both considered alive by all accounts. [Ren: They're not dead anymore? / What do you mean?] Akechi: They aren't mere illusions, or cognitive beings—they truly are alive and existing in this world. Akechi: In fact, their deaths seem to have never taken place at all in this reality. [Ren: What happened to Shido?] Akechi: Shido was the only one arrested on the crime of attempting to overthrow the government... Akechi: It seems the Phantom Thieves were causing a stir in this society as well, but there's no record of your arrest now. Akechi: Basically, in this reality, you and I haven't committed any crimes.
While Akechi still remembers his crimes, they never took place. They have been undone, and only his lingering memory—and Joker's, at this point—speaks to them. He objects to this on countless levels, he summons all the strength he has to refuse it, but don't make the mistake of thinking that means he doesn't want it. This is Akechi's wish in action.
People are often very certain that Akechi's resolve in the third semester is like iron—that he rejects Maruki's offers right away, is never tempted, never wavers. But that can't be true. We know he's afraid to die. We know about the bad end where you don't complete the Palace, where Akechi says nothing and stares at the floor, seemingly blaming himself internally while all the others blame themselves aloud, for being unable to say no to Maruki's temptations. We know how he responds to this assertion of Maruki's—Maruki, who has perfectly summed up what we know all the other PTs wanted, and who (even if Word of God hadn't just confirmed Akechi's wish) we have, honestly, no reason to doubt.
Because Akechi never refutes this wish that Maruki describes. He never says he doesn't want it. He just rejects it—like all the others, who so desperately want what Maruki could give them. Futaba's mother, Haru's father. Akechi's life, and his innocence. And the people who might have been his friends, if he could dare, one day, to ask.
Akechi is tested just like the others, and the price he pays for his defiance is perhaps the highest of all.
and finally
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[The Maruki ending illustrations are] of Maruki's world, where everyone's wishes are granted and they seem happy. The scene shows their actualised wishes, which were never granted in the real world. (Mumon Usuda, chief designer)
We shouldn't forget the price Akechi pays for his impossible wish. Sure, the vision of himself being altered like Sumire clearly haunts him, and I'm sure it made the choice easier—but I don't think it made it that easy. Instead of taking the dream Maruki offered him, Akechi chose to face up to what he'd done, and who he'd become; at the very end, in the third semester and in the engine room, he always makes the right choice.
And that choice was taken away from him. Agency over his life and death, his own acts, and who he would even be—Joker and Maruki take it all away from him and make him a puppet, just like Shido.
Maruki's ending isn't pretty.
revision history
Click here for the latest version.
v1.0 (2024/03/29)—first published.
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steddieas-shegoes · 2 months
Text
it's not ever what it looks like
for @steddielovemonth prompt 'love is saying you're sorry'
rated m | 3,299 words | cw: language, implied sexual content | tags: angst with a happy ending, arguing, established relationship, hurt/comfort, rock star eddie munson, teacher steve harrington, modern au, steve thinks eddie is cheating on him but HE ISN'T I PROMISE, marriage proposal
💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
It wasn't the first time Steve woke up to pictures and articles about Eddie being seen with some model or actor, but it was the first time he'd actually been worried.
Eddie had been distant lately. Usually, when he was on tour, he'd call Steve on his lunch break and text him when he got off of work, and he'd try to Facetime him after his show if it wasn't in a different time zone.
But for the past week or so, he had excuses. They sounded legitimate until one of the afternoons he said the band was caught up in an interview so he couldn't call and Jeff called him ten minutes later to ask where Eddie was. Even with that, Steve hadn't assumed he was cheating.
Steve figured maybe Eddie was just tired or his social battery had run out. Those kinds of things happened before occasionally.
But not daily for over a week.
He was barely even responding to texts, and the ones he did respond to were hours later and hardly adding to any conversation.
And now this article.
There was a picture of Eddie standing with his arm around some guy who was taller than him, both of them laughing, looking at each other like...well. Steve knew that look because it'd only ever been pointed at him, but now he was seeing it pointed at just some guy.
The headline read EDDIE MUNSON GIVING UP HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEART FOR SUPERMODEL SUPERSTAR?
Steve decided the only way through this was to read the entire article. At least then he could probably convince himself they were wrong.
Except the article went on to explain how Eddie hadn't brough Steve to any shows yet this tour, and how he'd been flirting more with the crowd after the show instead of just during it, how he was seen at two bars over the last week when he usually doesn't go out after shows.
It went on to say that these pictures were taken shortly after they'd been seen sneaking away from a group of people they'd been hanging out with and that they seemed very close for the entire night. The article said the guy was a male lingerie model who made it big posing for Gucci last year. He'd just landed his first film role as a supporting actor and was looking to land a lead role soon.
Steve hated him. And he was getting a terrible feeling in his gut about what was going on.
He had 26 unread texts, most of them from Robin, Dustin, and Gareth.
All of them had said mostly the same things:
I can't get ahold of Eddie.
He wouldn't do this.
Something else is going on.
Call me when you can.
The last one was Gareth, and it's not that he and Gareth weren't close, but they never talked on the phone.
He tried not to think about he didn't have a single message or missed call from Eddie.
Steve called Gareth.
"Steve. Shit, I'm glad you called."
"What's going on?"
Gareth sighed. "Ed's kinda losing it. But before you call him-"
"Why would I call him? Shouldn't he be the one to call me? If he wants to be with some supermodel, he should probably be the one to break up with me, right?" Steve could feel tears gathering in his eyes, stinging the back of his throat. "I'm not sure why I have to be the one to hurt and do the breaking up."
"Steve-"
"Is there something you needed Gareth? Or were you just trying to defend your friend?"
"There's nothing to defend! I swear-"
"Yeah. Well. Tell him to call me if he wants to explain anything, I guess."
Steve hung up just before a sob ripped from his throat.
He never had to worry about Eddie being a famous rock star, spending 6-7 months of the year gone, meeting all kinds of flashy celebrities. Eddie loved him so much, he never had any doubt that he'd always be his first choice.
Until now.
It was a shitty feeling and he had to be at work in less than an hour.
No time to wallow.
He sent a quick text to Robin to let her know he was okay, but needed to focus on getting through work, then shut off his phone.
"Is everything okay?" the art teacher, Mrs. Phineas, asked him on their lunch break. "You seem out of it today."
"Just a migraine," Steve gave a half-smile, hoped it was enough to convince her to leave him alone. He still hadn't turned on his phone, and at this point, he didn't really want to.
She tilted her head to the side. "When are you off to see your man?"
"Don't know," he shrugged, ignoring the tug in his stomach, the sudden weight in his chest.
"Ah," she said, turning back to her soup. "Something happened."
"Nothing happened!"
"You look two seconds away from crying," she gave him a deadpan look. "Did he hurt you?"
Mrs. Phineas was a little older than Wayne, close to retirement, and had been his closest friend from the moment he started teaching at this school nearly six years ago. He'd told her everything about Eddie, their relationship, his hopes of Eddie taking a longer break after this tour so they could have some time just the two of them, maybe make a real plan for their future.
Steve nodded once.
Her hand covered his and she squeezed his fingers in her own. "I may not know him half as well as I know you, but I know that boy loves you. You two will get through this, whatever it is."
"I dunno if we will," Steve whispered, scared to speak louder and risk the tears falling. He'd been doing so well today.
She patted his hand and went back to eating, saying nothing else about it.
His students had caught on early that he wasn't quite his usual self, and the group of second graders had been on their best behavior because of it. As the dismissal bell rang and he started calling for bus riders to line up, someone walked through his door.
Eddie walked through his door.
He bit back the anger, knowing his students loved Eddie and wouldn't know he was here for any reason other than to say hello.
"Mr. Munson!" A few of them yelled as most of them ran up to him instead of getting in the line Steve asked them to.
"Hi kiddos!" Eddie was faking it, but luckily the students couldn't tell. "Sorry, but you guys have to listen to Mr. H right now. I promise I will come say hi again tomorrow."
The students grumbled about it and Steve took in his appearance.
He had dark circles under his eyes like he hadn't slept the night before, his hair was in a messy bun instead of perfectly arranged to fall on his shoulders, and he was wearing Steve's hoodie that had suspiciously gone missing the last time he'd been home.
The fact that Steve's first thought was how badly he wanted to pull him into a hug was not a good sign.
He checked names off the list as they filtered out the door and then called the car riders to line up. He went through the list and made sure everyone made it into the hall where they'd be called when their parent pulled up before turning back to Eddie.
He closed his door and made his way to his desk, ignoring the way Eddie awkwardly stood by one of the student desks in the front.
"What are you doing here?" Steve asked, signing off of his work email and organizing tomorrow's lesson plan.
"I needed to explain-"
"Right."
"That article wasn't supposed to come out yet."
Steve's jaw dropped. So he wasn't going to deny it, he was just gonna act like it was the media's fault for releasing it before he could talk to Steve.
"Yeah. So you decided to come break up with me in person because you got caught cheating instead of doing it over the phone right before the article hit online. Got it."
Steve was not going to cry about this. Not in front of Eddie.
He was going to go home, shower, try to eat something, and then he was going to cry for the next 10 hours.
"No, Steve, you don't understand."
"You're right, I don't. I don't understand how you could throw away a 10 year relationship for a model who doesn't even know your middle name. I don't understand how you can fly all the way here and interrupt my day at my job to try to explain to me why you were so cozy with a guy who doesn't even know that you like your hot chocolate with Bailey's instead of regular milk. I really don't understand how you couldn't even bother to text or call me one single time since the article to even try to explain anything." Steve wiped his eyes furiously, angry that his tears were betraying him. "I don't understand why you would expect me to care for reasons."
Eddie wordlessly picked Steve's phone up off the desk and powered it on. He set it down in front of Steve and waited.
Texts and calls and emails came through all at once, hundreds of notifications lighting up his screen.
Many of them from Eddie himself.
"Go ahead. Open them," Eddie didn't sound mad, he just sounded resigned.
So Steve read through the texts, many of them different renditions of 'please Steve, call me' and 'I love you sweetheart I'm sorry.' Not promising.
But then he started playing the voicemails.
"Stevie, it's really not what it looks like. It's never what it looks like. You know that. Please call me as soon as you can. I love you."
"I can explain everything if you call me back. I promise you it isn't anything more than a business thing. Everyone in the band can tell you. I swear. Just. Please."
"I'm getting on a flight to you now. I'm gonna keep trying to call you even when I land. I need you to know what's going on."
"Just landed. I'm on my way to you. The guys are a little pissed, but you're more important than the show tonight. I'm not doing my own thing until I know you understand."
Steve looked up at him, tears still falling down his face.
"Well?" He asked, broken.
"His name is Wyatt. He's trying to make it in the acting world and he was pretty much told he was the top choice for playing lead in a movie that's in early stages of development," Eddie spoke quickly.
"Great for him."
"It's actually great for all of us. The movie is a biopic of Corroded Coffin. He's expected to play me."
At any other time, Steve would be proud, he'd be jumping up and down at this chance for them, and he'd be kissing Eddie without a care in the world.
But he still saw that picture and that article, and no matter how much "business" was going on, it was pretty clear that wasn't all that was going on.
"So you thought sleeping with him would help him get into the role? Or did you just wanna get into him?" Steve bit back.
"The article was wrong! The picture was just really conveniently timed! You know the media are vultures, Stevie. How many times have they written about us breaking up? How many times have they said Gareth and I have secretly been married for the last two years? How many times have they tried to post shitty things about your relationship before me to prove that you can't possibly be queer?" Eddie pulled Steve to his feet and cupped his face in his hands. "I've been spending the last two weeks talking with him and the producer and the guys to see what might work best for production. They want us involved in as much of the writing and filming part as possible. And he had time in his schedule to come to a show last night, so we all took him out after so he could get a taste of what it's like for us. He's really excited for the role and all of us are really excited for the movie."
Steve felt stupid. Well, maybe not stupid. His feelings were valid and he wasn't dramatic about what he'd seen.
But he did feel a little shitty about doubting Eddie.
Eddie, who had literally flown across the country to explain in person so that there was no way Steve could misunderstand him. Eddie, who once Doordashed him soup from his favorite restaurant when he was sick even though he was in Europe. Eddie, who sent letters to the kids in his class once a month to talk about how important music is and following your dreams. Eddie, who loved him for ten years and wouldn't have let anyone get in the way of what they'd built.
Steve fell against Eddie, buried his face in his neck and his hands in his shirt. Eddie's arms wrapped around him, his voice saying something against his shoulder. Steve couldn’t hear him, but he didn’t think he needed to.
He just needed to feel him.
“I’m sorry,” Steve said against his neck. Tears soaked the hoodie under him, and Steve could feel tears against his own button down. “I shouldn’t have- I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” Eddie shook his head. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone until the article hit, but I was still gonna call you and warn you but I didn’t and I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. This is part of the whole lifestyle. I should be used to it,” Steve shuddered as Eddie’s hand scratched at his scalp. “I should’ve reacted better.”
“We both didn’t treat this the way we should’ve.”
Steve snorted, nodded as he found the spot Eddie had tattooed on his neck a couple years earlier. He pressed his lips over the tattoo of his lip print.
“You flew across the country over this,” Steve pulled away and looked at Eddie, vision blurred from crying. “Just to make things okay.”
“I needed you to know. I needed to hold you. I needed to have you in front of me. And I wanted to celebrate the fact that we’re getting a movie about our lives,” Eddie smirked. “I wonder who will play you. Someone with a nice ass is a must. Their hair will have to defy gravity. Don’t know if they’ll find anyone with that smile, though.”
“Me? Why would they need anyone to play me?” Steve played with the string of the hoodie. “That might be kinda boring.”
“How would they make a movie about me and not include you? You’re the reason I ever made it past Hawkins, sweet thing,” Eddie leaned in to kiss his bottom lip. “Maybe they’ll just cast you. No one else could pull it off.”
“Eds-“ Steve blushed. “Wait. Okay, I trust you, but what were you doing in the picture?”
Eddie laughed. “He had just finished telling me about his boyfriend who lives in Italy. He’s apparently just a regular guy in finance who has no interest in the whole fame thing. Sound familiar?”
“Sounds like you two have a lot in common.”
“The picture was me asking if we could crash at their home in Italy next summer on our honeymoon,” Eddie said casually.
Steve froze. “Honeymoon?”
“I’m open to other places, but you still haven’t been to Italy and I know how much you wanted to see Rome and Florence,” Eddie was smirking.
That bastard.
“You are ridiculous, you know that? I’m over here planning how I’ll survive a breakup with you and you fly across the country to propose with a honeymoon planned before I’ve even said yes! You know how crazy that sounds, right?” Steve shook his head. “You’re lucky I love you. You’re lucky I’m not interested in big romantic gestures.”
“Damn. Hold on, let me make a call,” Eddie reached into his pocket for his phone.
“What?”
“I gotta cancel the big romantic gesture,” Eddie explained as he typed furiously on his phone.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“It was a whole thing. Robin was involved. There may have been 500 flowers ordered. I think it’s too late to cancel the singing telegram though.”
“I genuinely can’t tell if you’re being serious,” Steve wouldn’t be surprised if at least some of that was true.
“Oh, I’m serious. The ring was being set on the bed in the middle of a heart made of rose petals. I didn’t half-ass a fucking thing, angel.”
Steve pulled his phone out of his hands and set it on his desk. “Don’t cancel anything. I changed my mind. I am very much into big romantic gestures when it’s you doing them.”
“It was a team effort. I mean, I had to move it all up unexpectedly, but this was all gonna happen next month when I came home." Eddie pulled Steve into a long kiss, tongue tracing his lips. He pulled away to rest their foreheads together. "I'm not doing this just because of what happened, but I need you to know you're it for me. You've stuck by me through failing senior year, through being broke trying to book gigs all over the midwest, through the stress of our first album being released and the unexpected overnight fame, every album and tour since then, every time I've had to miss things that matter to you because of the band, all of it. You love me anyway. I don't always deserve it, but I'm grateful."
Steve's lips pressed against Eddie's again. "I love the life we have. I love you."
"I'm not asking you without the ring. I made so many plans. Robin will murder me in my sleep if I don't go through with them," Eddie laughed. "So can we get out of your classroom before I do something inappropriate and get you fired?"
"I mean," Steve glanced at the clock. "Technically all the students should be gone. We could lock the door..."
"Steven Harrington! How dare you suggest I fuck you over your desk in a school! I can't believe you would tell me to unbutton your jeans," he said as he unbuttoned his jeans. "And get on my knees." He got on his knees. "And suck you until you can't stand anymore."
"Eddie!" Steve chuckled, shoving his hand in Eddie's hair. "We should at least lock the door."
"So you're not saying no?"
"Why would I say no?"
"That's what I'm saying!" Eddie got back up and ran to the door, flipping the lock and turning back to Steve with flushed cheeks. "This is like, maybe three of my biggest fantasies in one, so I may actually come in my pants."
"You're ridiculous."
"Baby boy, my hand is my only friend on tour, you know that. How can I possibly hold myself back when I've got your dick in my mouth?" Eddie dropped to his knees again, looking up at Steve with something close to reverence.
"It's not in your mouth yet," Steve smirked as he tugged his waistband down enough to free his cock.
"Oh, I missed you," Eddie said directly to Steve's hard cock. "Steve, I want you to fuck my mouth until I pass out."
"I'm not doing that."
"Okay, well I'll settle for until I have to tap out."
"Fine. But it's not gonna be long for me," Steve shook his head. "Missed you, too."
"The sooner the better, sweetheart."
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clonerightsagenda · 18 days
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May I ask what the 'no sex in space' rant is? Zero G sounds like fun :<
The space sex rant is my passion. Possibly because I have no emotional investment in the act so when it gets broken down into weird biology and mechanics by the cruel forces of physics, I find it kind of fascinating.
Sticking this below the cut because it will get long. My primary source is Packing for Mars by Mary Roach, but A City on Mars gets into the same issues. Yes, at least two books have entire chapters devoted to the space sex problem.
Note that this is all assuming microgravity. Many of the problems go away if you have artificial gravity, which we haven't cracked yet beyond building centrifuges. Your Star Trek fanfics are safe. So without further ado, and in no particular order, reasons why you probably shouldn't have sex in zero gravity and it probably wouldn't be that fun if you did:
The infamous 'no boners in space'. Since we're evolved to live in gravity, our bodies compensate for it by putting more effort into getting fluids above our heart. In microgravity, that's unnecessary, so you end up with fluid shift - more fluids, including blood, in the upper body. Your total blood volume also goes down. This would make an erection more difficult, and in fact most astronauts interviewed for whom this would be relevant claimed they didn't get any. The outlier here is Mike Mullane, but having read his memoir, he is the kind of guy who would lie about that. Now, as I touched on while despairingly liveblogging Barrayar, that does not prevent you from having a good time. However less blood flow would presumably mean less sensation in general for anyone below the belt. Or if you stimulated too much blood flow, with the lower total blood volume, perhaps that 'got dizzy because I got horny' joke will actually come true.
In microgravity, body heat and CO2 don't disperse the same way they do in regular atmosphere. Astronauts have to make sure they sleep in well-ventilated areas and are also trained on symptoms of CO2 poisoning. If multiple people are in an area exerting themselves, that buildup will happen faster and would need to be taken into account. It would be super embarrassing to suffocate crammed into a closet for some hanky panky.
The laws of motion are not your friend here. I've seen videos of astronauts pushing themselves across the room with a strand of hair. If you're trying to hold onto someone, you'd either want a relatively small space (maybe not a great idea, see point 2) or hold on really well. One astronaut Mary Roach interviewed suggested duct tape. Perhaps fuzzy handcuffs are critical here. Still you're going to need to put a lot of thought into every move you make.
Space is gross. :( Right now astronauts just wipe themselves down with clothes and dry shampoo. "Skin flakes" is a serious problem. Also we're still not entirely sure why, but astronauts develop awful body odor. According to Mary Roach again, while armpits are famous as a BO source, apparently the crotch is as well, it's just that those regions are typically further from our nose. So idk if anyone's going to want to get that close and personal with anyone else while they're up there. Then again I'm sure people have hooked up in grosser situations.
I'm probably forgetting some tidbits since I just woke up, but in summary, zero gravity sex would need to be carefully choreographed, require some equipment (fan, fasteners), and probably wouldn't even be as enjoyable as its Earthnorm counterpart. It's a good thing that's not what anyone's up there for.
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wosoamazing · 2 months
Text
There is no 'I' in Team
Summary: Based on this request.
Warnings: Panic Attack, Mentions of Abuse Father (reading also asking not to be hit etc)
A/N: I hope you like it.
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The media was relishing your appearance, every reporter had thrown your name out in whatever interview they were doing, you were in stories on the front cover of the news.
“The 14 year old power house” “Some of football's greatest legends have honoured this youngster” “Beckham: That kid is insane, a star”
______
“And she missed, straight over the crossbar. What a rare sight to see,”
“Yes, yes, yes, ohh, missed opportunity again, it went wide”
“Fantastic save by Mary Earps”
"Wide yet again. She has had 40 attempts this game and only 2 on target, both of which Earps has saved,"
Australia lost the world cup to England, you felt like it was your fault, the media decided it was your fault, you were still plastered all over the media, however in a different light this time.
"Has the wonder kid lost her Wonder?" "A gold medal gone, was Y/F/N Y/L/N the right choice?" "Wonder if Beckham still thinks she is a star"
After the game you were incredibly disappointed in yourself and upset, and angry with yourself, you really questioned whether you were the best player of the team, the night you recieved a silver medal at the world cup was not celebrated by you. You were upset and so was the rest of the team, however they all still celebrated, but how could you when you were the reason the heavy disc that hung round their necks was silver and not gold. You were the only one that night who still had tears of sadness falling from your eyes as you went up to collect your medal, you still had sad tears in your eyes as you arrived back to your hotel room. Most of your teammates had left the celebrations to talk to you and comfort you at some point during the night. starting with the obvious ones, Caitlin, then Steph, then Sam, and ending with the not so obvious pick, Kyra, you and Kyra were very close friends it was just that the girls didn't think she would be able to help you in the way you needed. You didn't say a single word to any of them, you just continued to cry, as you remained in your tight coil on the bed.
You didn't talk to anyone about football for months, or even just in general, you tried your best to avoid everyone, you couldn't kick the feeling of knowing you had disappointed them. After training you would just go straight up to your room and lock yourself in, only appearing for dinner. Katie and Caitlin your newly adoptive parents were growing concerned, and were trying to figure out how they could discuss what was going on with you.
______
The opening match for the season hadn't gone that well for you, your shots weren't going in, which made you frustrated and with every off target shot your frustration grew. You couldn't wait for the final whistle to be blown, you just wanted to get off the pitch.
You were near the commentators as the whistle was blown, you could hear their debrief and opinions on the game, the players, more specifically you “As a coach you would be starting to think about changing your go to line up, off days happen, but this, this is different, from being up there with the best of the best, to missing the most basic shots, the shots that should 100% go in. Shots that caused your country to come second.”
You felt your breath hitch at that moment, the reminder you were the reason you came second, the reminder of how you let down your team, your whole country. Suddenly you could feel every single beat of your heart, you could hear blood rushing past your ears, you ran down the tunnel through the locker room and into one of the bathroom stalls, quickly locking the door before sliding down the wall. Curling yourself in a tight ball, hiding yourself away from the world. 
Your Dad’s words racing through your mind “You’re a let down, a failure. A complete waste of space.” You never believed him but maybe he was right, maybe the abusive bastard was actually correct, what if you were wrong, what if you didn’t deserve a new life. What if Katie and Caitlin didn’t actually want you, what if they weren’t actually proud of you, what if they were ashamed of you, what if you were a waste of their time, what if they hated you.
Out of the corner of your eye you saw someone standing near you. How did they get through the locked door? Were you so incredibly hopeless that you couldn't even lock a door? They took a step forward, and you felt your body start shaking slightly, coiling yourself into a tighter ball.
“Please don’t hit me, I’m sorry, I know I'm a waste of space.” you felt a hand on you, however it wasn’t a painful touch, it was a soft comforting hand, but you couldn't risk it, trying to move out of the grip of the persons hand, however soon they had both hands on you, slightly gripping onto you so you couldn’t move away.
“I’m sorry, I’ll do better, I’ll leave, I know you’re ashamed of me”
“Baby girl it's okay, it's just me, I’m safe, I’m not going to hit you, I love you, it’s okay, everything is alright,” They said in a very soft, calm voice as they moved you into their lap. A familiar scent met your nose it was Katie, you slightly relaxed at her presence, but quickly tensed again, what if she thought you were a burden, you felt like you were swaying, your head felt foggy, you felt sick, your body was shaking, your face was wet from your streaming tears.
You felt the hands wrap around you tighten, “I’ve got you, you’re okay, can you take some deep breaths for me? Like we practise.” You took some deep breaths. “Good Job,” you sat there with Katie for a few minutes.
“How about you have a shower and then we can talk. Okay?” you nod, “But just know that Caitlin and I love you so much, and we are very proud of you and we are so happy you came into our lives, and I promise that is not a lie” you stand up with her and give her a big hug before going to shower, you almost hated the way she knew what you were thinking, almost always. While you were showering no one came into the shower, which you thought was weird, until you walked out of the showers and saw everyone standing there huddled around Katie.
Katie noticed you were standing there. “You ready to talk?” you nodded slinkishly, “come here” she sat down and gestured for you to sit down on her lap, you willingly went over, and sat on her lap. Caitlin sat next to the both of you.
“What’s wrong?” Katie asked you “I’m not good enough”
“Why do you think that?” Caitlin queried.
“We lost the final because of me. And now we lost because I couldn't shoot,” you took a deep breath and paused for a moment “Maybe i shouldn't have become a footballer” you sad before a small sob left your body.
“Hey, we came second because of you, we wouldn’t have been in that match if it wasn’t for you. It doesn’t matter what they say, if you weren’t on our team we wouldn’t have been in that match.” Steph told you.
“You know, you are amazing kid, it’s okay to have off days, off weeks and off months, its okay, and it’s not fair for anyone but especially yourself to blame losses on yourself, its a team sport, we win as a team and we lose as a team” Leah told you and you just nodded your head, the whole team reassured you that you were still good and an excellent player even though you were having some off days, you had calmed down but the team stayed where they were for a little longer, to show you that they were there for you.
The team went off to shower eventually, but Katie did not, you just stayed sitting in her lap, soaking up her warm embrace. “What if we invited some of the girls over for a movie night tonight, would you like that? They could even sleep over.” You nodded your head.
That evening you found yourself surrounded by your teams as you watched a movie, they all really cared about you and supported you, so you made yourself a promise that you would start to try and open up to them more.
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bad268 · 6 months
Note
Hey. I love your blog. It's amazing. Is it possible for you to write about actress reader x colby brock. Like they are each others favorite and Sam and colby invite her to one of their investigations. Like in one of her interviews found out that their her favorite YouTubers and colby might ask her on a date?
Thank you so much 💗
Tweets (Colby Brock X Actor! Reader)
Fandom: RPF/Sam and Colby & Co.
Requested: Clearly (I had a little too much fun with this one lol)
Warnings: none.
Pronouns: First person (I/me)
W.C. 1087
Summary: An unearthed tweet leads to shocking revelations (with a best friend's intervention).
As always, my requests are OPEN
MASTERLIST // HITLIST
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~~(^@/Colby's insta from November 16, 2023)
It all started with a resurfaced tweet from 2015…
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I can’t say it was a lie, but it was before my big break, and I didn't have a manager running my social media accounts 24/7. I was just a normal teenager on Vine with time to kill. And now, I thought it was coming back to haunt me, pun intended.
That was until I received a DM from Colby himself asking me to be a part of their yearly tradition, Hell Week. At first, I was starstruck, but I would have been crazy to decline.
So that’s where we are now: preparing for the Conjuring House. A place of extremes. A place I told myself I would never go to because of how insane it is, yet here I am. And, of course, it’s going to be for a week. 
I was invited to Sam and Colby’s place to go over the specifics of the trip. I had just finished filming my latest movie, which was coincidentally being filmed in Las Vegas, so as soon as my scenes were wrapped up, I set off for their house.
By the time I got there, everyone else who was invited was already there. At least, I assumed with the number of cars in the driveway. I was still in stage make-up, but thankfully, I had changed into something more comfortable before I left the set. I grabbed my backpack before jumping out of my car, locking it, and walking up to the door, ringing the doorbell.
Almost immediately, the door is being opened, and I am face to face with Colby. After a beat of us just staring, speechless, at each other, I cleared my throat. I chuckled nervously before saying, “Hi, apologies for being late. Filming ran a little longer than I originally planned. I hope I didn’t hold you all up too long.”
“Nah, don’t even worry about it,” he dismissed quickly as he stepped aside and ushered me inside. “Come in, and I’ll show you where you can put your stuff. You’re staying and going with Sam, Seth, and me to Rhode Island, right?”
“If that’s still alright with you guys,” I replied, walking in step with Colby up the stairs. “I don’t want to impose on your personal spaces. I can go home, just say the word.”
“I would never kick you out,” he laughed, leading me down the hall and stopping just before the end. “Here is your room. There is a bathroom attached. It’s right next to the closet, and if you need anything, my room is right there.” He paused as he pointed to the room at the very end of the hall. “I don’t care if it’s the middle of the night. If you need anything, let me know.”
“I’ll feel bad if it’s the middle of the night, but I will keep that in mind. Thank you,” I replied as I walked in to set my bag down on the vanity. “I’m just going to take my make-up off and meet you guys downstairs if that’s alright.”
“No problem,” he said, “We’ll be in the living room and we’ll either order food later or go out. We’ll see how everyone feels.”
“Ok, cool, thank you!” I said enthusiastically as he left down the hall. I closed the door over as I walked deeper into the room. I grabbed out my micellar water, cotton pads, and hydrater before walking into the ensuite to clean my face. As I set them on the counter, I noticed a piece of paper.
It was a printed screenshot of Twitter. A specific tweet from Colby in 2016 read, “Give me a chance y/n.” The back of the paper had its own handwritten note.
“You have been Colby’s celebrity crush for years. I know you posted a tweet in 2015 asking if he was single, and I don’t know if it was a joke or not. I didn’t show him the tweet, but I can say he’s single now if that tweet is still true. Please just get him to shut up. -Sam”
I chuckled at the note before quickly cleaning my face to head downstairs. Everyone was sitting on the couch or on the floor facing the TV. Everyone except Colby. I glanced around the room, trying to find him, only to see him standing in the kitchen. He was looking through the fridge, so I walked up behind him.
“Can you hand me a water?” I asked, startling him in the process. He jumped up straight, sucking in a quick breath as he snapped around to look at me. “Did I scare you or is that residual energy from the Conjuring House?”
“No, I just…” he trailed off for a second. “Yeah. I wasn’t expecting you down here just yet.”
“Kinda like how you didn’t expect me to see this?” I teased as I pulled the paper out from behind my back. Colby’s eyes grew wide as his jaw dropped. He stammered, trying to come up with a reason behind it, but he could not get a cohesive thought out. “Don’t worry. I’d give you a chance.”
Colby stopped entirely. I could see the gears turning in his mind before he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He opened his eyes, immediately meeting mine as he reached out to take the paper from my hands, setting it on the counter. He held my hands in his as he closed the distance between us. 
“Y/n, will you go out with me?” Colby whispered as he bit his lip in nervousness.
“Of course, I will,” I whispered back as a smile spread across both of our faces. 
“How about after this meeting we get out of here and do mini golf and dinner?” He offered, leaning his head down to rest our foreheads together.
“I will take you down,” I laughed as I leaned more into his body. “Truth be told, I’m great at mini golf.”
“Okay, lovebirds, we get it,” Sam interrupted from the living room. “We get it.”
“Shush, Sam,” I quipped back as I snapped my head to look at the group on the couch, still holding Colby’s hands. “You’re the one that left the note in my bathroom.”
“Wait, there’s a note?!” Colby shouted as he immediately let go of one of my hands to flip the paper over, reading through the note. “Sam, I told you this in confidence!”
~~~~~
© BAD268 2023. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.
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Text
D-RIDING?! PART ONE
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‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE
GENDER: FTM READER
SUMMARY: You are quite a popular YouTuber who makes random content for your fans to enjoy until one day you got drunk and "accidentally" posted a tweet in your official account making it go viral for not only the world to see, but even a certain idol you had a crush since 2019.
GENRE(S): Comedy, Fluff, A bit explicit (in part one), hurt/comfort a bit
WARNING(S): Didn't really proof read it or use a Grammer site to fix anything. If I got anything wrong well..ill fix it when I'm not tired (or not). If you haven't seen any BuzzFeed's thirst tweets, you have been warned. The reader is going through every stage of grief. Mentions of drinking, you being drunk, mentions of "Dick Riding", a few of thirsty comments. You're getting called "Pretty Boy." Explicit comments but nothing action, yet. You are a bottom (sorry y'all!) Kinda cringe. You fanboying non-stop.
CAREER: Idol-Bang Chan (26) + Youtuber-Y/N (25)
OTHER(S): all edited by me. Chan has a private channel but he did reveal his YouTube account in this story. Ethan, Antione and SanaVana are your best friends.
Some mistakes on the edits as well but wtv
Please reblog, like or/and comment!
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(We are going to pretend this is around SKZ LALALA Era, thank you very much! Not restarting the edits!)
You couldn't believe your eyes when you opened Twitter (Or X...) As you see thousands of notifications of a certain post you made when you were drunk with your friends at a birthday party.
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You felt yourself wanting to scream but all you could do is stare in shock, having your mouth hanging a bit while reading the comments stating that your idol, Bang Chan from StrayKids, read your tweet.
Not in private, but apparently he finally accepted an interview with BuzzFeed to read Thirst Tweets.
Since when did he have the balls to do that?
You groaned as you even saw the hashtags that were trending: #YnnityD-RIDE #BangChanThirstTweets #BuzzFeedBangChan #YnnityMoment
You honestly wanted to cry because you didn't know how to face your fans when you make a live stream later. You promised the fans that you were going to play that one horror game that your fans have been requesting.
At this point, you thought about just cancelling it while disappearing. Dramatic but you couldn't help it.
The Bang Chan read your tweet.
Well, you never saw the video and honestly you didn't want to. You found out that your tweet was not only read but even edited into the thumbnail with Bang Chan fine ass self beside it from a friend's screenshot.
You were mentally regretting this while weeping but you didn't want to disappoint your fans from a promise you made so you calmed yourself as you got ready to Go Live.
You place your mouse pad down and then connect a few wires into your computer. You went to your channel as you Go Live, with a title going by "Gaming and reacting to a certain video."
Just by that title, everyone immediately clicked the live.
You sat there, nervously biting your lip out of habit while fixing yourself in front of the camera.
You even waved to everyone while trying not to seem like you about to trust fall on top of a building.
"As you may see from this title, you probably know what certain video I'm going to watch, yes?"
Everyone commented "yes" while a few sent question marks but other than that they are curious of what the video is and my reaction.
"I didn't see the video yet but I immediately clicked on the app, saw my notifications, saw what's trending and even a screenshot from my friend. I am crazy embarrassed. I was drunk and the fact that she saw me tweeted this is the most crazy part. I knew she was my enemy since DAY ONE!" You shouted a bit at the end, joking but honestly not really as you make a dramatic 'number one' finger in front of the camera.
"Anyways, I already got it set up, just let me know if you guys can hear it or not..."
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You mentally screamed as you tried to click on the video but you were so hesitant that the fans called you out on it.
"Y'all, we got it! Hold up, I'm just scared of how he is going to react! Ahhh!" You grabbed your forehead as you finally clicked on it.
You watched as Chan nervously laughed at the camera while introducing himself with his hot Australian accent. You felt yourself smiling as you tried not to fanboy just by his introduction.
"Ah, Hello everyone and my lovely stays! My name is Bang Chan, the leader of StrayKids, you can even call me Chris, and today...I'm finally reading your crazy thirst tweets. I don't know how I mentally agreed to this but I am curious so let's get started shall we, BuzzFeed?"
Chan chuckles nervously as he holds a plastic container full of thirst tweets.
You commented how cute he was while admiring him, ignoring slightly at your fans chat box, even not noticing a certain someone has joined your live stream and even commenting as well making the chat go crazy as they try to grab for your attention.
You continue on watching, make a few comments on the thirst tweets, stating that you agreed with half of the tweets he was reading while cooed on his blushing face:
"I want to ride his big nose"
"I wonder what else is big besides his nose, feet and butt if you know what I'm saying"
"I want that man to manhandle me so bad, it's not funny anymore."
"I want him to fuck me so bad! Uhhh PLEASE DADDY!"
You couldn't help help but laugh at a few, almost forgetting that your tweet was in this video until finally, almost at the end of the video, he pulls the last strip of paper and reads:
"Dick Riding? Yes I am. I'm jumping, hopping, creaming, screaming and latching...onto this man dick until we can't anymore. And in parentheses. We not stopping."
Chan covers his face while laughing as he re-reads the tweet again.
"Jeez, this person really must have that much energy to be going in several rounds. Not only that, this person is verified...how confident you are to send this in your official account. Not gonna lie, I feel like I know who this is..."
He squints as he tries to remember.
"I'll probably figure it out later but thank you! I don't think I have enough energy for that but we can try, yeah? Haha!"
Your eyes wide as you literally scream, jumping around and running around the room then stop running as you walk back, rewatching that clip again.
"Wait, he knows me? HE RECOGNIZES MY ACCOUNT- WAIT WHOA!" That's when you sat down on your gaming chair, literally looking like you were about to sink into the floor as you make your eyes focus on the chat that seems to be spamming non-stop.
You lean in, reading the chat as you questioned them what's wrong until you notice a channel you recognized. Of course who wouldn't recognize it, you literally have a crush on him.
The one and only Bang Chan was watching your live.
At this point, you just accepted your fate as you face palmed yourself as more comments started laughing at you.
"Om my goodness, this cannot be real. Ain't no way you are watching this stream..." You nervously said as you see him commented how cute you were.
You smiled as you started to fanboy again.
"This is so embarrassing you guys!"
Time went by as you ended your live stream. You immediately grabbed your phone and laid down on your bed as you opened Twitter (X) to see Bangchan following you.
You followed him back immediately which I guess it got his attention as he immediately texted you.
CB97: Hey, Y/N! It's nice to finally meet you, well through text that is, haha!
Ynnity: I can't believe you not only read my tweet and joined my live, you even FOLLOWED ME IN HERE!? You must be crazy!
CB97: Of course, I even have you subscribed and followed your Instagram on a private account!
CB97: And crazy? Aren't you the crazy one who sent a tweet on your official account stating you wanted to, and I quote, "Jump, hop, cream, scream, and latch onto my dick non-stop" pretty boy?
Ynnity: HELLO?
CB97: Haha, I'm just saying. Plus, you're funny so why not become friends. I'm quite a big fan of you!
You stared at his text, mostly the part when he called you a "Pretty boy" made you roll around the bed, giggling like a damn school girl. Even surprised that he was a big fan, making even more embarrassed since you always mentioned him in certain videos.
Ynnity: Sure!
Ynnity: hope you don't mind how awkward I'm going to be for a bit..I'm still embarrassed.
CB97: That's fine! I don't mind and there isn't anything to be embarrassed about baby, it's cute how you reacted
CB97: You really do love me, huh? Hahaha
You rolled your eyes as you typed your response.
Ynnity: yeah yeah whatever
CB97: Acting like that even though I literally watched your live stream and saw you admiring and commenting my every move
CB97: Anyways, I read a few of your tweets and one caught my eye
CB97: well, besides that thirst tweet, that's my fav-
CB97: That you are going to see our concert, yeah?
All you did was send a 'thumbs up' emoji, indicating that it was true that you saved up money to be in front row seats to see SKZ performance on the 3rd day.
CB97: Cool! Can't wait to see you in person! However, I need to get back to work, I'll talk to you...well you text me when you are up! Bye bye, pretty boy!
YNNITY: don't overwork yourself old man and yes bye bye to you as well!
You laughed when Chan sent a 'thumbs down' emoji as you turned off your phone, smiling again at the ceiling. You couldn't believe it, you can't wait to go to their concert in three days.
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Two days have already passed as you already got dressed up for this concert.
Today is the 3rd and last day of their performance.
You are wearing a black waist coat where your belly and other skin is showing along with a leather black jacket, baggy black pants with a nice star belt around It, a spikey silver necklace and black shoes.
You brought a coat just in case it gets cold as you took pics and uploaded it onto Twitter (X), feeling cute.
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You rolled your eyes at your friend's immediate response to your tweet as you walked out of your house, stepped into your car as you get ready to pick up the three dorks.
While driving to their destination, you couldn't help but think about what Chan texted you yesterday.
He is excited to see YOU.
You were biting your lip as you tried to not show a smile when you picked up Antione and apparently Ethan who were standing outside of Antione house, waiting.
They both ran inside, Antione taking the front row while Ethan sit in the back.
You then drove off again to pick up Savannah while the two teased you non-stop about getting noticed by your so called 'Future Husband' which they did stop after you threatened them that you will crash this car if they don't shut up.
You finally picked up Savannah who was excited to see StrayKids, mostly seeing all the pretty lady fans as she comments about wanting to see this one girl that she has been texting the last 5 months.
You laughed with your friends, easing your anxiety down. You all couldn't wait to go while singing, well trying to sing, the songs on the radio.
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You all made it into the concert, immediately at the front seat, waiting for the concert to start. Antione had his banner ready, holding a sign that says "Changbin, date me!"
Ethan holds up a LeeBit Plushie, shaking it around while holding a picture of Lee Know next to it.
Savannah holds a sign that just says "The Lesbians (Me) loves you!"
You did think about bringing a sign but all you brought was yourself and friends along with a small Wolfchan keychain hanging around your belt area.
A bunch of fans have showed up—some recognized you as they asked to take pictures, which of course you said yes, taking a few while waving them goodbye. Even Savannah gets to meet the woman that she was talking about, laughing and flirting a bit.
As all of you continue on chattering while the whole stadium gets filled with a bunch of fans, the screens turn on showing a special StrayKids clip, showing all the members walking and posing.
Everyone screams along with you and your friends as well as you see them rising up from below the stage, into positions, ready to perform Megaverse.
You smiled, jumping a bit as the loud music started playing along with fans chanting.
You took out your phone as you started to record while singing some of the lines.
Throughout the whole concert, you and Chan were flirting around when he found you while performing Blind Spot.
He couldn't help but smile in your direction while giving you small hearts. He even goes up to you sometimes, singing a few lines—teasing you—as he walks off.
Even your friends teased you about it, again.
The concert was about to end, your whole body was practically tired from all the screaming and standing up for too long but it was worth it.
All the members lined up as they all said their thankful speech, waving all of them goodbye and couldn't wait to see their fans again next time.
You and your friends left as you forced Ethan to drive since you were so tired.
You were sitting in the front row while Antione and Savannah talked amongst themselves, sometimes Ethan joining in. While that was happening, you open Twitter to see a bunch of notifications again.
Some @ you, showing pictures with your fans along with pictures or videos of you having a moment with Chan.
You smiled as you liked all of them until you got a text from Chan, you clicked the message notification and read what he has sent you.
CB97: Hey, did you enjoy the concert?
CB97: Also you look very handsome with that outfit, very alluring.
You giggled quietly as you quickly replied to him.
Ynnity: of course I enjoyed the concert and thank you! I did say I was trying to attract people in my tweets~
CB97: You did.
CB97: You even got me as well, that one comment from your friend made me laugh that you wanted to be in my Dingie Doom Dum haha!
Ynnity: Well, what if I do? What you going to do about it hm?
Not sure where all that bravery came from but you did it. You waited for him to respond as you did see him trying to type something.
CB97: Well aren't you a brave one.
CB97: why don't you find out. I'll come to you unless you are just trying to flirt. I don't mind as long as you don't mind, love
CB97: I can make that thirst tweet into reality~
You froze as Ethan made it to his house. Seems like you were the only one left as you both stepped out, hugged each other and left.
You stepped back into your car, turning it on and drove off. You wanted to respond, but you didn't want to drive while text so you kinda drove home as fast as you can, feeling yourself getting too excited.
When you made it home, you quickly parked as you stepped out of the car and ran to the front door of your house, unlocking it.
You took out your phone again and responded to him.
Ynnity: Sorry, I was driving
You hesitated for a bit even though you were the one who started it until you finally typed out what you wanted to say.
Ynnity: I don't mind, but how are you supposed to get here? You rented a car?
You took off your shoes, placing them on a shoe rack as you take off your clothes while walking to your bedroom.
You dumped your clothes in a laundry bag, opening the closet to grab your pajamas then walked to the bathroom to take a shower.
Your phone buzzed. You grab and see what he has said.
CB97: I did actually.
CB97: Send me your location, I will be there after I take a shower
You bit your lip as you sent your location, turning your phone off after that.
You step inside the shower, feeling the nice warmth of water hitting your skin as you fantasize about Chan kissing you and touching you.
You wanted this and the fact it's with your idol crush turns you on. You couldn't wait as you continued on taking a shower.
TO BE CONTINUED...
PART ONE -> PART TWO (COMING SOON)
I never wrote smut before 🐺 this sht gonna be crazy. I'm about to fight for my life.
458 notes · View notes
ssahotchnerr · 10 months
Note
Hii!! Can you do hotch x reader where hotch is all grumpy and reader is the complete opposite but he is all soft and cute towards the reader
perspectives
wc; 1.2k cw; bau!reader, angst, hurt to comfort, no established relationship but <3
aaron had never been a fan of car rides.
long car rides, to be exact. heading to the bau was never an issue, same with running around town, errands, taking jack to soccer. but a journey more than an hour? nearly unacceptable.
the luxury of traveling via the jet throughout the years definitely didn't help. and while numerous rides exceeded well over that hour time frame, at least that didn't compare to a car ride's length to the destination. that ideology was more manageable, easier to accept. and besides, he wasn't the one who was flying the plane.
so whenever it was necessary to make the trek to the state prison for interviews, about two hours away from quantico, it was displeasing. it was irritating. but it had to be done and complaining wasn't in his vocabulary.
the changing point, however, was you.
the first time you accompanied him, you had newly been added to the unit- still wide-eyed with innocence, not subjected to the horrors just yet, nervous yet excited jitters making you squirm in your seat.
he envied you in that aspect- being able to see the world in a lighter view. so maybe when you asked if you could turn on the radio, he didn't hesitate to comply.
and upon your second ride together, he flicked the radio on as soon as the engine started.
perhaps that gave you the confidence you were waiting for - finding an open, more inviting atmosphere to speak your mind.
"you know, you frown more in the car."
your words surprised him, "what?"
"it's true." you were relaxed in your seat, looking out the window and admiring the scenery passing by. "sometimes i wonder if you can even see past the windshield with how much your eyebrows are drawn over your eyes."
his lips fell into a line, but amusement bubbled within his chest. "i can see perfectly fine."
you laughed, and in that moment, aaron realized just how badly he needed that to grace his ears. "i would hope so. we haven't crashed yet."
aaron chuckled softly, his eyes returning to the road ahead.
"so, car rides huh?" not only was your wit quick, but so was your ability to read him like a book.
he huffed out a breath through his nose. "hate 'em."
"haven't you heard, it's not about the destination, but the journey?"
"our journey leads us to a high security establishment containing the worst of the worst." aaron deadpanned.
"sure." you shrugged, turning back towards the window. "but maybe it's all about perspective."
and maybe you were right.
as time moved forward, you became his frequent passenger. when the opportunity arose to take a drive, anywhere in that matter, you were always the first to volunteer.
it became routine- aaron tuning the radio to your favorite station upon the engine's ignition. his once silent rides were now accompanied by music, small talk followed and ultimately turned into full blown conversations. work related or not.
and suddenly aaron preferred the car to the jet, enjoying your presence and lightness you suddenly indulged him in. you were rather talented in elaborating, your intuition seemingly limitless. the conversations you fabricated were both amusing and constructive, and the two of you could partake in such for hours. you were easy to talk to, kind and open, not the one to be judgmental. and throughout, you looked at him in a way that made him feel so vulnerable it was frightening, but extremely safe. he could open up about the depths of his mind and you would still look at him the same way. in addition, he couldn't remember the last time he actually had the urge to open up. willingly.
sure, he could sit with you on the jet (and notably, he did) and get the same exchange, but he preferred the peace and stillness of just the two of you. you, him, and the open road.
and maybe more importantly, you made him feel like himself again.
-
while it was bound to happen, aaron dreaded when the job would take it's toll on you.
aaron often admired your level-headedness, your ability to remain objective and to not dwell on the darkness as many agents do; the all consuming abyss. your bubbly personality coincided with seeing the good in all things, despite all circumstances.
no wonder you got along so well with garcia.
you maintained your sense of strength, for so long, aaron feared how hard it would hit you; the realization darkness would never cease it's attempts to triumph light. and that same darkness would attempt to overcome you, no matter how much light you offered.
manageable. if he couldn't protect you from the inevitable (although, he would if he could - in less than a heartbeat), he could at least make it manageable.
slowly and surely, your inner sparkle was dimming. and he wouldn't dare allow your light to diminish.
an interview at the virginia reformatory arose, and something about this unsub had riled you up to the extreme- aaron's never seen so much fiery behind your eyes. but despite your hatred, you had insisted on going- your vigor all too similar to one he knew well.
"his guy," you seethed, buckling your seatbelt rather forcefully. "is sick. what he's done-"
"i know."
"they didn't deserve it hotch." aaron nearly flinched at the use of his name, he's gotten used to hearing aaron from you. "why do we have to drive all this way, to get stupid answers from a stupid, vile ass clown who doesn't want to speak to us to begin with? we're going to get nothing out of it. nothing."
"i see you've been hanging around dave too much." aaron commented, hoping to lighten the mood.
but your attitude didn't falter, not like it would've previously. "why do we have to go? driving all the way out there is pointless."
aaron shrugged, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. "i don't mind the drive."
you snorted a laugh, your comment flying out of your mouth. "since when?"
"since someone," aaron's eyes found yours. "changed my perspective."
"yeah, well," you slouched in your seat, mumbling under your breath. "what do i know."
"a lot more than you give yourself credit for." his answer was simple, true.
"c'mon."
"i'm serious. yeah, this sucks. it's going to be an unpleasant afternoon. but..." he paused for emphasis, bringing a sense of playfulness. "the journey."
another scoff came from you. "and what could possibly come from that."
"you never know." before aaron could overthink himself out of it, his hand reached over the center console, finding yours naturally- as if it were it's rightful place to be. where it belonged.
your hand was just as soft as he expected, somehow more, even. he gave it a squeeze, and it immediately brought a bit of light back into you. your shoulders dropped, warmth returned to your face, looking at him in a sense of awe, almost.
unknowingly to each other, both of you felt it. where aaron's touch met yours, every part of him was aflame.
"the journey." he repeated. "that's the whole point, isn't it? you never know what, or who, will be the outcome."
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poetessinthepit · 3 months
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It's amazing how many people are incredibly uncharitable towards Palestinians and Arabs in general. I can recall this one video on YouTube where an Israeli guy is asking a handful of Palestinians what they think of Hitler; it's hardly scientific. The majority of Palestinians interviewed in the video have an unfavorable view of Hitler. One guy specifically says Hitler was evil because he burned jews. There are a few of them who say positive things, but then the translator makes it clear that they are joking or being sarcastic. Only 1 or 2 people in this video say good things about Hitler in seriousness.
While that is alarming and no one should be praising Hitler, I think you'd sadly find similar answers in any area of the world where people do not get a decent education on WW2, the holocaust, Hitler, etc. For example, when I was in India, I saw a pack of cigarettes at a truck stop called Hitler cigarettes. My assumption was not India is full of nazis but that there is ignorance about who Hitler was in India ( hindu nationalists/modi supporters are actually comparable to nazis, but that's another convo).
Even with this minute sample size, the video hardly confirms the popular Israeli narrative that Palestinians are nazified people. Yet, if you only read the comments in the video and you didn't watch it, you'd think the opposite was true.
Many of the comments say the video is terrifying and chilling and proof that Palestinians don't want peace/hate jews/are nazis. Some say that even the Palestinians who called Hitler "bad" or "evil" or a "tyrant" are just lying for the camera, and you can tell by their body language. Commenters who don't speak a lick of Arabic insist that in the cases where the translator says the interviewee is not being serious, the translator is whitewashing the answers. Apparently, arabs incapable of joking. If somebody randomly came up to me on the street and asked me, "Do you think Hitler was good?",I can imagine easily laughing and sarcastically saying,"No, he was a good guy. " Maybe not if someone shoved a camera in my face, but I have an awareness of how things could be misconstrued that these people most likely do not.
And I'm not saying there is no antisemitism in Palestine,that would be ridiculous, but it's interesting to me that Israelis can say the most explicitly anti-arab racist shit and people will go out of their way to not see it for what it is, but a Palestinian can clearly state say Hitler was evil man because he burned jews and people will insist that their body language reveals they are a secret nazi.
I might remember some of the details wrong, but I'm just spitballing about something I vaguely remember.
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neptuneiris · 3 months
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Behind the Scenes (05/05)
Behind the Success
pairing: actor!aemond × fem!reader
summary: you and Aenar finally meet Aemond's family, closing one chapter of your life and starting a new one with Aemond in it.
word counter: 8.7k
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it's here!🥳
I've finally finished the chapter and I'm so excited for you guys to read this!
and how is it possible that another story is going to end soon? because if you didn't read my previous message, there will be an epilogue, so it's not yet the definitive goodbye for this little family we have created🤭
also before reading I want to thank you for your support and please leave me your opinion, lately the comments have gone down and I wish to read you🙏🏻
oh I also want to make a small clarification before you reed:
in the second chapter it is mentioned how aemond at the end confessed everything to his family in a desperate attempt to find Y/N. but let's forget that hehe🤭 let's pretend that aemond never told them so you can enjoy this chapter and the light drama you are about to read.
now read and enjoy, ily all!
warnings: slight angst, aemond's family melting our hearts when they meet aenar.
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Aemond immerses himself in the world of acting with the same fierce dedication with which he confronts his characters on screen. Every move, every word, everything is carefully rehearsed and executed.
Each project is a challenge, an opportunity to explore new roles and demonstrate his versatility as an actor.
The hustle and bustle of the film set fills the air as he immerses himself in his role. The bright lights illuminate his face, conveying the intensity of his character as he delivers his lines with palpable emotion.
But when the bell rings, as well as the director's shout of "cut!" is heard, Aemond is Aemond again.
Behind all those shots, scenes, interviews and awards, no one knows that Aemond is a father, at least no one outside his close circle. He only confided the news to a few close co-workers, some production people and his older sister, Rhaenyra.
He managed to persuade some rumors after some people at first saw him entertaining Aenar in the nursery on the set, because even though there is nothing wrong with it and Aenar is his most precious treasure and a pride of his life, he knows it is better to protect him from the public eye.
And now that Aenar has his own nanny at home, sometimes even then the whispers would start to get too much and he would make sure that some member of the production crew, known for their ability to spread harmless gossip, would plant the idea that it was simply a close family friend of the child they had seen him with.
And in the midst of all his work and everything he has to do, Aemond finds the precious time to be with his son.
Aenar, a whirlwind of laughter and childlike energy, fills every space where the two are together with light. Games, stories and hugs become routine and Aemond cherishes every moment he can spend with him on his days off.
He even reduces his own working hours and focuses entirely on filming his scenes, also attending one or two interviews per month, in order to have more quality time with Aenar, who is more important than having to please the press at every moment.
And as he balances the intensity of the job with his responsibility as a father, Aemond fights for to rebuild the trust you once placed in him.
Every gesture, every conversation, was an effort to demonstrate that he is fully committed to getting things right this time. Every encounter with you, he demonstrates a quiet determination to making amends for past mistakes.
With carefully chosen words and acts of genuine support, he tries to show you that he understands the pain he had caused and is willing to go out of his way to regain your trust.
And you accept this, because you see how he makes an effort to open up more, to share his thoughts, his fears and his hopes. But above all, you see how he is making an effort with Aenar, which is the most important thing.
And you also see how parental responsibility has changed his perspective and maturity. But still, Aemond knows that rebuilding trust takes time and forgiveness is not something that can or should be rushed.
Even if you decide never to forgive him, he's okay with that and is getting the idea from now on that you only allow him to be close to you because of Aenar and only because of Aenar.
So in the meantime, you immerse yourself in your own workday.
The makeup and wardrobe trailer is a world of constant motion and productivity in any given area, though your mind is always on Aenar and also on Aemond.
And even though you both carry separate jobs at the same place during the day, you both manage to create a balance between your jobs and raising Aenar.
Evenings were for you and Aenar if Aemond didn't finish recording at the same time as your shift ends. And almost at dusk is when Aemond comes from work and devotes every minute of his free afternoon to Aenar.
Instead if you both finished your shifts at the same time, you both spent time together with Aenar.
However, the nights brought calm.
Once Aenar fell asleep and before Aemond retired, you and he find your own space to talk, share thoughts, talk about work or more importantly about Aenar. And today just happens to be one of those nights.
You finish cleaning the kitchen, while Aemond is sitting on one of the stools, with a cup of coffee in his hands, looking out the large windows to the back garden, thoughtful.
While he has in front of him the IPad with the image of the camera in Aenar's crib that records him sleeping, attentive and making sure he is well.
"I've been thinking a lot lately," he says, breaking the silence in a soft voice, catching your attention.
You watch him from the sink, setting a clean, dry dish in the drainer, then drying your hands with a clean cloth.
"About what?" you ask him softly, attentively.
And he takes a moment before answering, thinking very carefully about his words and what he means, not wanting you to misunderstand him in any way.
"On Aenar and... us."
He confesses and you lean on the other side of the island that separates you both in front of him, giving him your full attention.
"At first..." he starts to say, slightly flustered, "You didn't want me to hide him from the world and I-I... well, I obviously disagreed with you."
He says and bites the inside of his cheek, lowering his gaze, feeling embarrassed.
"But now... I think it's not fair to him that no one has any idea that I have a son. It's also not fair for anyone to know that you're the mother of my child."
His gaze again meets yours and a sense of understanding envelops both him and you.
"Now things have changed," Aemond continues, his tone laden with sincerity, "And I know that you and I are n-not together but... maybe... I can announce the news, only if you want me to."
Silence fills the kitchen in its entirety for a moment, as Aemond holds his breath at your possible response, honestly feeling terrified to expect a bad reaction from you.
But none of that crosses your mind, on the contrary, you just digest his words. But your silence is what causes a mixture of expectation and anxiety in Aemond, who holds his gaze with yours, nervous.
And finally, with a serene sigh, you go around the island that separates the two of you and approach him, placing one of your hands on his shoulder gently and in an attempt to comfort and reassure him, instantly feeling his whole figure tense, while he watches you with his big healthy wide eye and his prosthetic eye remains the same as always.
"Aemond," you begin to say in a soft voice as he watches you completely attentively, "I always wanted you to recognize Aenar publicly, that was what I wanted most at first. But now...
You pause for a moment, thinking about your meditated words, as you sink for a second into your own thoughts and what you really want to say, as Aemond watches you intently, waiting for you to continue.
"I understand your world more now," you continue, "And, honestly, I can't blame you for not agreeing with me back then, only in this," you make clear, "Recognize him legally would have been the right thing to do and... enough," you say holding back the sadness in your tone of voice.
But Aemond catches that break in your voice, a moment of your vulnerability that makes him feel a sharp, simmering ache in his chest, as if every word you utter drops a weight on his shoulders, with shame again invading him, but this time with a mixture of deep remorse and regret.
A barely audible sigh escapes his lips, lowering his gaze, ashamed, feeling the burden of his past choices and he wonders amidst the brief silence if he will ever be able to fully redeem with himself.
But he doesn't have much time to think about it, as you gently squeeze his shoulder to bring his attention back to you.
"And now I understand that the press and people's opinions can be very dangerous and destructive," you say softly, "And I don't want that for Aenar, at least I don't want to deal with that yet," you confess, "I want him to grow up a little more and we can both enjoy his early years without having to worry about it."
An expression of surprise and also longing crosses Aemond's face, still watching you intently, processing your words.
"Are you sure?"
You place a soft smile on your lips.
"Very," you assure, "I just want him to grow up in a calm and safe place, without falling fame on him nor all this attention being so young," you explain, "I have no problem with it, but also your opinion counts."
"No, I-I... I want the same for him too," he agrees with you, nodding, with all the pressure and anxiety he felt being replaced by a mixture of gratitude and relief.
And you nod back at him, smiling softly in his direction.
"But..." he says with a slight urgency in his gaze and concern in his tone, "I just want you to know that when the time comes, I won't do it for attention or to be relevant."
He says seriously, softly and honestly.
""I'll do it because I know it's something I have to do, for him and for you, as in the beginning maybe it should have been. But for now I just want us to enjoy these moments and, when the time is right, make that decision together."
The room fills with the honesty of his words and you can feel the sincerity in each of them, as a sense of calm envelops you both and you share a soft, complicit smile.
"Sure," you nod to him, feeling a warmth wrap itself all over your chest.
Your gaze moves away from his for a moment, focusing on the iPad screen where Aenar is shown sleeping, while Aemond can't help but focus on the features of your face with an intensity that can't go unnoticed by you.
Deep longing is reflected in his gaze, with a palpable mix of regret and sadness that is projected beyond mere facial expression. And he feel that weight on his body and chest again, a burden he can't help but feel.
His healthy eye glides over your face as if searching for answers in every line of expression and in his gaze, you can perceive the longing to repair the irremediable, the need to know how much he regrets the decisions of the past.
"Y/N-
He starts to want to say, his voice laden with regret, but you turn your gaze to him and stop him.
"Aemond, we have already talked about this."
"But I'm sorry... I really am," he insists, with pain in his gaze, "And I know an apology isn't going to fix it, I know that, neither is anything else but... I am really sorry and you don't know how much I hate myself for everything I put you through."
"No," you shake your head, "There's no need for you to keep apologizing," you tell him softly, "It won't do either of us any good to keep bringing up the mistakes of the past. Nor will it serve you to keep punishing yourself for what has already happened," you say as tactfully as you can.
His expression reflects a mixture of gratitude and frustration with yourself.
"Yes, I know, I understand," he murmurs, lowering his gaze, "It's just... I feel like I have to say it."
"Aemond, what matters now is this, how we move forward from here now that we've both learned and grown. Aenar too," you add, "And that's all that matters."
He nods slowly in your direction, his gaze showing a mixture of appreciation and relief, even with the remorse within him, as you both then sink into a moment of silence, letting the unspoken words echo in the air, but you both know those words, they just don't need to be said.
The relationship dynamic between you and Aemond since then takes a new path, a less tense, more bearable path of total trust. And this is not lost when the two of you are together in Aenar's presence.
Until one day, on your day off precisely, Aemond after work, comes to you telling you some unexpected news.
"I told them."
You turn fully towards him, giving him your full attention, understanding but at the same time not what he really means.
The living room starts to feel tense, while Aenar completely oblivious to it continues to play on the floor with his toys, but you focus on his gaze, where there is a charge of confession in his eye and you notice his whole body in a position of determination but also nervousness.
"Come, sit down," you tell him in a soft voice, pointing to the couch, while at the same time getting up from the floor to take a seat next to him.
And he almost with a defeated expression and posture, does as you say, letting out a sigh.
"What happened?" you ask, watching him intently.
He inhales deeply, looking at Aenar on the floor, who is the only one who can make him feel a little calmer, as well as your presence next to him.
"I told them about everything that happened," he confesses to you, "Our relationship, your pregnancy, my team, the decision I made in the beginning, everything I caused and how much I hurt you," he says as he feels his heart knot, "Everything. Everything that happened from then until now... and Aenar."
His words leave a weight in the air, as you anticipate how bad and difficult that conversation must have gone with his family to see him this way, so serious and tense.
"And how did they react?"
Aemond closes his eye, lowering his gaze, his posture reflecting the emotional baggage he carries with him and how bad it definitely went with it.
"Just as I expected. Obviously they were disappointed in me."
He says without much emotion, but with slight pain in his tone
"My grandfather couldn't believe it and was shouting how come I kept all that from them. Hel was very shocked, Aegon and Daeron too. And mother said a few hurtful things, started crying and telling me how I could keep these things from her," he exhales deeply, "Rhaenyra and Daemon were the ones who helped me calm things down a bit, but still my grandfather and mother were upset with her for knowing and not saying anything."
The tension of what happened feels palpable, as if he is reliving his family's every reaction, with the heaviness of disappointment and pain reflected in his expression, as you beside hom, share the weight of that difficult moment.
You are both silent for a moment, only hearing the sounds of Aenar playing with his toys.
"I'm sorry," you whisper in his direction, placing your hand on top of his, as if trying to somehow ease the pain he feels, "It must have been very difficult for you."
"No, Y/N," he observes you instantly, speaking to you in a soft tone, "You don't have to apologize. I deserved this and I'm not saying it to cause pity or play the victim," he adds with earnest sincerity, "I'm saying it because it's true. This is the least I deserve after everything you had to go through because of me."
You decide not to say anything at this, just offer him your silent support, while he again seems lost in his own thoughts for a few long seconds, where neither of you say anything.
When suddenly, Aenar emits an infectious giggle, instantly attracting both of your attention.
His small hands hold a toy with enthusiasm, his smile and the tenderness he conveys bringing brightness to the living room and the state Aemond is in, who smiles softly at the scene, watching him with complete adoration.
He sighs and rises from the couch, moving towards him, holding him gently, needing the sensation at that moment of holding him in his arms.
Aenar squeals with excitement and joy, placing his small arms on his chest, moving energetically in his arms, smiling big at him with his blue eyes completely filled with a glow.
The scene makes you smile softly, especially when Aemond also takes one of his toys and begins to play with it in his arms as he starts to walk slowly around the living room, talking to it in a honeyed tone and causing Aenar to babble incomprehensible words but full of happiness in his tone.
And when Aenar entertains himself with his father's silver hair, Aemond speaks again, turning to you to observe you.
"Despite everything, they want to meet him," he says, watching Aenar in his arms, "And they also want to meet you, my mother more than anyone else."
And this also completely grabs your attention.
"Really?"
"Hmm," he nods, "But I didn't tell them yes or no," he lets you know, "I wanted to consult it with you first."
"But is this good or not?" you ask, looking to find positivity in the situation, "Or do you think they shouldn't know him yet?"
"Of course they should," he tells you softly, "I owe this to them, also to you. But as I tell you, I didn't know how you would react if I told you they would meet him soon, I wanted to check with you first."
You place a reassuring smile in his direction.
"Aemond, for me it's perfect for Aenar to meet his grandmother, his uncles and aunts. It's a great opportunity and will definitely be good for him," you assure him.
"Yes, it is," he nods, unconsciously beginning to imagine the moment, "They can come or we can go to them, whichever you decide."
"Either way is fine with me," you shrug, "When might that be?"
Aemond thinks for a moment before answering.
"We could arrange it next weekend. Sounds good?"
You nod with a reassuring little smile.
"Sounds good."
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The Targaryen—Hightower family decides to come to you.
When Aemond gives you the news, even though at first you were totally fine and had no problem with it, inevitably knowing it instantly makes you nervous.
You've never met his family before, not even when you and Aemond were a couple for obvious reasons. And even though his family isn't involved within the entertainment and film industry, you've still heard enough about them to feel slightly intimidated.
About Alicent Hightower, Rhaenyra and Daemon Targaryen more than anyone.
The uncertainty of how they will perceive you, especially after disappearing from Aemond's life without warning and also how they will treat you, that's what worries you the most.
But the fact that they will be coming to your house relieves you a little. Fortunately you won't be interacting with them in unfamiliar terrain and you're sure that the presence of Aenar, his toys and Aemond will go a long way to reassuring you.
"Do you need help?"
Aemond appears behind you, while you find yourself cleaning everything you can from your living room and Aenar, as usual, is sitting on the carpet with all his toys around him.
"I'm just cleaning up in here, then I'll go clean the kitchen."
"Don't worry, me and this little handsome will clean the kitchen."
He walks over to Aenar and takes him in his arms, who is already dressed in an outfit too cute for the occasion and smells like baby soap from the previous bath you gave him, ready to meet his family.
Aemond goes with him to the kitchen, sitting him in his perch, keeping an eye on him while at the same time starting to clean up.
You start moving some of Aenar's toys, organizing his play area a bit, to create a more orderly and cozy space in the living. You also mop the floor and arrange cushions.
Aemond washes a few dirty dishes and cleans all the shelves, also mops and spreads your favorite Lavender scent, which besides smelling amazing, calms your nerves.
You also ask him to help you tidy up the dining room while you clean the bathroom, wanting everything to look clean and spotless, while Aemond takes Aenar in his arms again to let him play in his play area and he watches him closely from that new distance.
"Maybe I should have cooked something?"
You walk over to him, slightly concerned.
"What? No," he turns to you, instantly, "Y/N, they're coming to meet Aenar, not to eat."
"I know, but..." you explain, nervously, "I thought maybe it would be a good idea to have something prepared, out of courtesy and.... I don't know. Won't it be rude of me if I don't have anything to offer them?"
"Of course not, you don't have to," he clarifies, more serious but with a soft tone, "If you want to have something prepared, let it be some drinks, nothing more."
Still you watch him hesitantly and worriedly.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, very sure," he assures you, "In fact I'll prepare them. You rest and take care of Aenar. I'll finish cleaning up everything else."
"No, I-I-
"Rest," he repeats, interrupting you, placing a hand on your cheek gently, "I know this may be overwhelming, but they will come to meet Aenar and you too. And you don't have to put too much pressure on yourself. Everything will be fine."
Her warmth and understanding manage to comfort you a little, making you stop feeling so tense little by little.
"Now rest, okay?" he says softly to then walk past you and head towards the kitchen, not taking any argument back.
It's clear that he wants to lighten your load and make sure you feel comfortable about all this that's about to happen, with his actions conveying reassurance.
And finally after a while, you are ready and waiting in the living room with Aenar, playing with him, while Aemond is sitting on the single sofa and who a few minutes ago let you know that his family is on their way.
And after a few more long minutes, Aemond now lets you know that his family has already passed through the security gate that leads into the private neighborhood.
Knowing that fills you with nerves again, but Aenar's babbling as he hands you his currently favorite toys distracts you a bit.
"Are you okay?"
Aemond asks you from where he sits, watching you intently and noticing the tension all over your face and body, while you try to look completely calm and relaxed.
"Yeah, yeah, just... a little nervous," you say trying to place a genuine smile on your face as you distract yourself by touching Aenar's toys, "Who exactly is coming? Other than your mother and siblings," you can't help but ask.
"My grandfather."
You watch him expectantly, waiting for him to tell you more, but he doesn't.
"And that's everyone?"
"Well, Rhaenyra said my nephews wanted to come too, my uncle Daemon with his daughters too but I asked them to wait a little longer," he explains to you slightly concerned, "I didn't want you to feel nervous and overwhelmed if my whole family invaded your house. And Aenar sure would have felt scared too."
You bite the inside of your cheek and he rises from the couch to walk over to you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.
"Hey, don't worry, okay? It's going to be fine. They're excited to meet you and Aenar."
You release a long breath through your nose, placing one of your hands on top of his, feeling your shoulders especially start to feel less tense.
"Yes... thank you," you tell him with gratitude in your gaze, appreciating his support.
And then the doorbell rings.
Aemond gives you one last reassuring glance, assuring you that everything will be fine, then turns and heads for the door to greet them, as you rise from the couch and take Aenar in your arms.
The tension in your shoulders gradually dissolves as you hold your baby in your arms, replaced by a sense of calm, as you watch the front door intently and finish mentally preparing yourself.
Aemond opens the door gently with a warm smile on his lips and the first to enter is his mother, Alicent Hightower, in a beautiful, elegant green dress, followed by who you assume is Otto Hightower, his grandfather.
His mother wraps her arms around him and leaves a loving kiss on his cheek which Aemond reciprocates, as he also greets his grandfather, who watches the entire interior of the house with an inspecting gaze.
Behind Otto enters Rhaenyra, who embraces Aemond.
"Thank you for coming," Aemond says to her, leaving a kiss on her cheek.
"Of course," she smiles at him, leaving a soft kiss on his cheek as well before pulling away from him.
"You guys too, thank you," she says to Aegon and the rest of her brothers, "Come on in."
Both brothers, Aegon and Daeron, embrace him, speaking words of assurance, leaving Helaena at last, who throws herself into his arms with obvious emotion, smiling with joy and longing, as Aemond leaves a kiss in her hair.
Then Aemond closes the door and before heading towards you, who are still standing very still near the couch with Aenar in his arms, his whole family finally notices you and especially the child in your arms.
"Thank you for coming, all of you," Aemond repeats as he turns to you, "Let me introduce you to Y/N," he points to you, "She works on the same recording set I am currently working on as well."
You put on the best friendly and kind smile possible, as Aemond takes Aenar in his arms so that you can meet his family. And the first to address you is Alicent, with her stunning elegance and a soft smile on a warm face.
"Nice to finally meet you, my dear. My son has spoken so much about you."
The tension almost completely leaves your body, feeling grateful and relieved by the welcoming tone of her voice, evaporating your fear about how everyone, especially her, would treat you.
"The pleasure is mine. I'm happy you're here."
You reach out your hand to her and, pleased, she takes it. But she takes you by surprise when she pulls you closer to her and wraps you in a gentle embrace, definitely not expecting that.
You freeze for a moment, then, a little hesitantly, return her embrace, grateful for the affectionate welcome. And when you both part, she has a smile that denotes sincerity and cordiality, then points you to Aemond's grandfather behind her.
"This is my father, Otto," Alicent introduces you as he watches you with an appraising expression, "He has also heard much about you and was very pleased to come here."
And though his look is somewhat... intimidating, you don't let that invade your nerves.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Hightower," you tell him in a soft, polite voice, extending your hand to shake with his as well.
"The pleasure is mine, Y/N," he replies in a low, polite voice, shaking your hand briefly.
"And this is Rhaenyra," Alicent points you to the woman who is just as refined as she is and shares Aemond's same characteristic of silver hair, as do the rest of his siblings.
She smiles towards you and gracefully approaches, then embraces you in greeting mode, as does Alicent.
"It's nice to finally meet you," she tells you cheerfully, "Aemond told me so much about you and of course your little one," she tells you as she gives Aenar a loving look.
"The pleasure is all mine. Aemond also spoke a lot about you and was very excited to meet you," you tell her, as she holds your hands in a gentle grip.
"Well here we are," she tells you without wiping away her smile, then looks behind her, turning her attention to the rest of Aemond's siblings, "Oh and they are my siblings," she gestures you towards Aegon, Daeron and Helaena, who have friendly glances in your direction.
Aegon steps forward first, extending his hand.
"I am Aegon. I hope you're not feeling overwhelmed with so many silverheads invading your home."
"No, no, not at all," you laugh softly, taking his hand, "It is a pleasure to meet you, Aegon."
Daeron is next, greeting you with a friendly smile.
"Hello, nice to meet you, Y/N. I'm Daeron. Aemond told us a lot about you and Aenar."
"Pleasure to meet you, Daeron," you say, noting the sincere camaraderie emanating from both brothers.
And finally, Helaena gives a few towards you, with an expression of pure excitement on her face and hugs you effusively.
"At last we meet!" she exclaims happily, "I was so excited to see you."
"Oh," you respond to her hug also a little surprised and with gratitude, "It's nice to meet you. Aemond has also told me a lot about you.".
"Good things, I hope," she says with a smile, pulling away from you.
And gosh, you can just see how much her sisters and brothers resemble Aemond. Their beauties are otherworldly and even Alicent is truly beautiful, as much as Rhaenyra is.
"And this..." begins to announce Aemond with Aenar in his arms and a radiant smile lighting up his face as he approaches the center of the living room, where his entire family watches him intently, "This is our son, Aenar," he says with pride in his voice, finally introducing his son.
Everyone's gaze focuses on the baby in Aemond's arms, who oblivious to the situation, watches them back with his huge bright blue eyes curious and expectant, while you place a small smile, anticipating the magical meeting of your little one with the rest of his family.
Helaena, visibly moved, can't hold back tears and tries to calm herself, with happiness, longing and nostalgia in her eyes. Aegon smiles with pride and Rhaenyra with adoration.
And meanwhile, Daeron, Otto and Alicent barely finish processing the reality of having Aenar in front of them.
Until Alicent steps forward gently, his eyes and gaze shining with curiosity, slight surprise, longing and adoration as he watches the little one, his newly presented grandson.
"Is that my grandson?" she murmurs in disbelief with tears beginning to form in her eyes and a hand on her chest.
Aemond, with a warm smile, nods at the question.
"Yes, Mom," he gently observes her and seeing her condition, looks at her with complete understanding, "Do you want to hold him?" he offers, carefully extending Aenar to her, sharing in the joy of her holding her grandson.
Alicent, tears streaming down her cheeks and visibly moved, nods in a touched nod with her gaze reflecting all her emotions, joy and awe.
She takes another step forward and reaches out her arms, where Aemond carefully places Aenar in her arms, who now watches him adoringly and with a mixture of happiness and emotion reflected in her gaze.
Alicent can't help but let out a couple more tears as Aenar babbles and watches her with great wonder, moving his small hands to her brown hair, starting to play with her curls, making her laugh softly in the midst of her tears and all the emotions she feels.
Aemond watches his mother tenderly as she enjoys her first encounter with her grandson, while you can't help but feel moved as well and wipe away a few tears that have escaped your eyes, watching the moment with emotion and nostalgia.
"My little Aenar," Alicent whispers, tenderly kissing his forehead, cradling him in her arms.
Aemond, still smiling and holding back his tears, diverts his gaze to you and you watch him back, where you both share a small smile and a silent complicity, both feeling the same way and recognizing the happiness this moment has brought to your lives.
And then Helaena approaches together with Daeron towards her mother, to watch Aenar and share the joy of the moment.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" comments Helaena, smiling, as Daeron watches him with a small smile of adoration and strokes his silver hair tenderly.
"Absolutely beautiful," whispers Alicent, her eyes shining with tenderness, not taking her eyes off him for a second.
"He's lovely," Rhaenyra comments with her soft little smile.
And then Alicent lifts his gaze to Aemond.
"And he looks exactly like you, darling," she tells him tenderly, recognizing the familiar features on Aenar's face and creating a moment full of emotion and family connection.
Aemond, touched and grateful, smiles at his mother's words.
"I think he has a little bit of both," Aemond replies, sharing a proud look with you.
Aenar physically by hair and eyes resembles Aemond, but some features of his face he definitely inherited from you and you can't help but smile in his direction.
And then, within the next few minutes, the whole family continues to make affectionate moments with Aenar. Helaena being the most excited is the one who now holds Aenar tenderly in her arms, leaving a couple of loving kisses on her cheek, while Rhaenyra approaches her to observe Aenar with a motherly gaze.
The imposing figure of Otto Hightower stands watching with satisfaction the scene unfolding in front of him, especially as he sees the happiness and excitement of Alicent and his grandchildren.
He doesn't say much, but his presence exudes a sense of quiet approval and though he doesn't show it, he honestly feels proud of Aemond, this reunion of his family and the arrival of a new member to it.
As Aegon approaches towards Aemond with a friendly, warm smile, placing a hand on his shoulder where he shares his gesture of brotherhood and pride.
"Congratulations, brother," he tells him sincerely, "He is beautiful and a mini version of you."
Aemond nods gratefully, the smile on his lips and places one of his hands on top of his.
"Thank you, brother. I appreciate it."
Now it is Daeron who takes Aenar in his arms and carries him to his play area, followed by Helaena, Rhaenyra, Alicent and you.
Helaena also takes a seat on the carpet with Alicent and the three of them start playing with him, who shows his enthusiasm and fills the living room with his giggles, melting the hearts of everyone present.
The atmosphere definitely becomes livelier and warmer, transforming into a special moment for everyone, where both you and Aenar feel completely comfortable and happy.
And as a few long minutes pass, Aemond watches all the interaction, happy and completely pleased, seeing how you converse with Rhaenyra and the rest of his family is totally entertained by Aenar.
Even his mother asks to have her picture taken with him and slowly begins to fill a new photo album of her grandson on her phone reel, completely enchanted with him.
Such a sight and such a moment couldn't make him happier, being a moment he needed so much and couldn't be more proud of. And how could he not?
His watching his son integrate into his family. And you are definitely getting along great with all of them.
Aegon stands by his side, sharing the gesture of complicity as they watch Helaena and Daeron make sounds with Aenar's toys that make him laugh and squeal with happiness.
Absolutely beautiful.
"So..." Aegon begins to say beside him, catching his attention, "You're going to show him to the world?"
He watches him intently, as Aemond holds his gaze for a second to look back at Aenar with an affectionate gaze, smiling softly.
"That's what Y/N would have wanted at first, when she got pregnant," he says softly, remembering those painful moments, "But no, at least not yet," he replies, turning his gaze back to his brother, "We talk and want to give him a normal childhood as much as possible."
Aegon nods with understanding, listening to him with full attention, then lets out a sigh, watching Aenar.
"The world is going to go mad when they find out, little brother," he says with an amused smile.
"I don't care," he says with a shrug, "All I care about is him."
Aegon smiles warmly again, acknowledging Aemond's priority as a father and he couldn't be prouder of him. He may be the older brother but Aemond...he's the one who matured first, always cleaning up his shit and making sure everyone was okay.
And even though when Aemond told them about this, about you and Aenar, it turned out to be a complete disaster, Aegon is glad that right now his family is responding in this way, loving you and Aenar.
"And what happened to Criston?"
He decides to ask you, curious and attentive, as Aemond takes a moment and exhales deeply, he too being a person who brings back horrible memories of the past.
"I fired him," he replies with a disinterested wave of his hand, "And his entire team too," he adds, "That's what I should have done in the beginning with him."
"And he threatened you?"
Aemond lets out an amused smile, remembering those days as well.
"Yes but I hired a lawyer and they made him sign a confidentiality sheet," he explains, "He couldn't do anything against that."
Aegon nods, pleased to hear those words, as you both turn your gaze back to the family, where Aenar's laughter still echoes throughout the living room, Aemond smiling lovingly as he watches his mother assail him with soft kisses.
Your soft laughter catches your attention as well, watching you with almost the same adoration and love as he watches Aenar, watching you converse with Rhaenyra where you both let out soft giggles at whatever it is you are talking about.
And he can't help but watch you extra longingly, wistfully, happily and longingly, loving to see the smile on your lips and the look of joy you have, his perfect and beautiful Y/N.
He honestly doesn't know what would have become of him if he had never seen you again. He'll probably still be sunk in his misery, regretful and trapped. But with each passing day he thanks the Gods for this, again and again, this second chance.
And Aegon doesn't take this unnoticed, the way his brother is looking at you.
"You really fucked things up with her, didn't you?"
His words break the spell he was under and he bites his lips, averting his gaze from you, beginning to feel ashamed and also with that guilt simmering in his chest.
"Yeah," he replies in a low murmur.
"You still love her."
Aegon tells him watching him intently with a complicity and understanding, not asking any questions, as he is making a statement, affirming it.
And Aemond again speaks the truth, neither denying it nor hiding it.
"Never stop doing so."
Aegon lets out a long breath, honestly feeling bad for him, to place his hand on his shoulder again.
"Brother, we all make mistakes," he tells him softly, "People fuck up and fuck up badly. I'm sure you get that from a person like me," he points to himself, still speaking in a serious tone, "And the important thing is to learn from them and move on. And I'm sure she's seen that in you."
"No, Aegon," he says softly, shaking his head, "What happened between us was different and... unforgivable," he says with the slight pain in his tone, "This is all happening only for Aenar and his well-being."
"So you don't plan to do anything about it?"
"I don't know," he says regretfully, letting out a sigh, "Things are complicated. And with everything that happened surely Y/N doesn't feel that way about me anymore. Besides what really matters is Aenar and I want to be a good father to him."
"I understand that, brother. But maybe all is not lost and all you need to do is try," he tells him in an encouraging tone, "Life is unpredictable, you know? And who knows... maybe Y/N still has feelings for you."
Aemond grimaces.
"I don't know, bro. I don't think so."
Aegon decides to say no more, just nods, for after all, he understands the complexity of his situation. And inevitably, though he shouldn't, with the words he has spoken to him, Aemond feels a small glimmer of hope.
Meanwhile the inside of your house continues to fill with laughter and conversation as everyone enjoys family time. And in the middle of it all, Alicent notices you going to the kitchen for a moment, this catching her attention and being the opportunity to talk to you.
So, giving her attention away from her grandson since she arrived, without saying anything to anyone, she discreetly follows you into the kitchen.
As she passes through the frame, she sees you arranging the drinks that Aemond prepared for them on a tray, wanting to offer them. But when Alicent's figure entering the kitchen catches your attention, you immediately turn to her.
"I don't intend to take up too much of your time, my dear," Alicent hastens to speak with a small smile on her lips.
"Oh, yeah, yeah," you nod immediately, "Do you need something?"
"I just want to talk to you," she answers you softly, "And it's nothing bad, I just... want to thank you for welcoming us into your home," she says, showing the sincerity in her look and tone, "I honestly haven't felt this happy in my life in a long time. And meeting Aenar has definitely made me very happy," she pauses a little, "Thank you."
"No, no, you don't have to thank me," you reply, with a soft look, "It's a pleasure to have all of you here. And you have made Aenar very happy too."
"No, I really do thank you," she insists with a soft tone, "Your home is beautiful and definitely an excellent place for Aenar to grow up."
"Oh, thank you," you smile kindly at her, "Actually this house was bought by Aemond. He must have told them or at least you, I suppose."
"Yes, he did," she nods, "He also told us how much you refused at first but I understand you. It must have been a very meaningful but very overwhelming gesture for you."
You nod with understanding, biting your lips.
"Yes," you murmur, "Yes it was. But I only accepted for Aenar," you hasten to clarify, "I didn't do it for my own convenience, whether for money or fame. I accepted for Aenar, so that he could have his father in his life and together give him the best."
"Yes, sweetheart," she advances towards you and takes your hands between her gently, "I know," she assures you, "You don't have to explain anything, everything is more than understandable."
You let out a long breath.
"Thank you," you tell her sincerely.
"It's okay," she smiles softly at you, "And listen, I-I... I really don't want to make you uncomfortable nor do I want to make you feel bad, in fact Aemond asked me not to talk to you about this but..." she looks at you with some tenderness and longing, "I just want to tell you how very brave you are, Y/N."
You shudder at the sweetness of her unexpected words, feeling a warmth run through your chest as a mixture of gratitude and longing flashes across your face, suddenly feeling completely vulnerable.
"I didn't blame you for deciding to run away, no one judges you for it."
She lets you know by telling you in a soft voice and as tactfully as possible.
"As much as I would have loved to have met you sooner, Aemond's decisions were terrible and I can't imagine everything you had to go through on your own," she says with slight shock and sadness, holding your hand tighter, "Your pregnancy, living in a new unfamiliar place and trying to make it on your own."
You bite your lips, feeling a sharp pain in your chest and tears begin to form in your eyes, but you gather your strength and try not to let them fall despite the memories of painful moments.
Her words resonate with genuine understanding and her warm touch brings you a comfort you didn't expect but definitely needed.
"Yes," you whisper, feeling the lump in your throat, "It was very scary and very difficult," you confess, "But Aenar made every sacrifice worth it."
"Of course," she murmurs, with a sympathetic look.
"Oh and... it must have been hard for you too," you say, remembering, "In those days seeing Aemond so sad and desperate must have worried you a lot. It even almost put in danger his career and you had no idea about me and what had happened."
"Yes, that was very scary too," she nods with a sad smile, "We didn't know what had happened, he pushed everyone away, even Helaena and... I couldn't stand to see him like that, but he wouldn't accept our help either," she explains, "But now, just like me, I've never seen Aemond so happy in his life."
Her tone is genuine and you hold her gaze with appreciation and understanding, feeling completely grateful for this pleasant acceptance and welcome by Aemond's family.
And in that moment you can feel, as Alicent does, how your connection grows stronger in your shared understanding of past challenges and new hope.
"You are a strong woman, Y/N. And I also want you to know that regardless of the circumstances between you and Aemond, I want you to know that you are part of our family now and we are here to support you."
You feel a happiness and relief course through your body, grateful for her words and her total understanding, as you nod in her direction.
"Thank you, Alicent."
And Alicent unable to contain herself, wraps you in a hug full of tenderness that you reciprocate, with the atmosphere filling with a sense of mutual acceptance and support.
And from there, the rest of the afternoon is spent sharing laughter and creating special memories.
Aegon plays with Aenar while Daeron and Helaena join in the fun, making your little one laugh with every quip and funny face that Aegon especially makes.
Alicent and Rhaenyra also join in, creating a connection with Aenar and showing him affection, while Aemond and you watch it all sitting together on the couch, each with a smile on your lips.
Until the visit comes to an end and the family says goodbye with expressions of gratitude and affection. Helaena is the one who insists on exchanging numbers to stay in touch, while she along with Alicent and Aegon promise to visit again soon.
It's a bit hard for Alicent to want to let go of Aenar, but eventually she does and then Aemond and you finish picking up and sorting all of Aenar's scattered toys.
Until it's also time for Aemond to leave.
"Thank you for this day. It was amazing and better than I could have hoped for. Even mom loves you more than she ever loved me."
You smile in his direction sincerely, laughing softly.
"It was nothing, Aemond. It was all very nice. Your family was very kind and Aenar had a great time."
"Yes," he murmurs as he watches his little boy adoringly and then turns his gaze back to you, "Still, thank you... for everything."
You see the intent in his gaze, also in his body, the way he fights it, catching your attention and being a bit amused at it, then moving towards him and wrapping your arms around his neck, hugging him.
Surprised and definitely not expecting that, Aemond doesn't take long to reciprocate your embrace, a little hesitantly at first but he does, slipping his arms around your waist and pulling you close against him.
A sigh escapes his lips as he closes his eye, feeling that warmth in his body and that almost happiness at the sensation of having you close again.
He had missed it.
The embrace conveys a mutual support and understanding, also a kind of affection that Aemond can't quite decipher.
But honestly at that moment he doesn't mind and allows himself to enjoy and seize every moment of this feeling, knowing that he may not be able to have you again soon in this way, before you both part and he drives to his apartment.
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Regular visits from the Aemond family to your home become a pleasant daily moment. Each encounter brings laughter, love and a sense of family unity.
Aenar, with his contagious laughter, becomes the center of attention, further strengthening family bonds.
The bond between Aenar and his relatives grows stronger over time, so his extended family becomes fully involved in his growth and development. Laughter and play fill the halls of your home, creating precious memories.
Eventually you also meet the rest of Aemond's family as well as Aenar, like Daemon Targaryen, who is definitely a bit more intimidating than Otto Hightower. But once Daemon feels confident, he's the coolest guy.
You also meet Aemond's cousins, the twins Baela and Rhaena, Daemon's daughters, who are extremely kind and sweet to you.
And you also meet Rhaenyra's sons, Jace, Luke and Joffrey, where eventually she also introduces you to her youngest children, Aegon and Viserys.
Your relationship with each member of the Targaryen-Hightower family develop into genuine friendships. Helaena, Rhaenyra and Alicent become confidants and allies to Aenar's shared upbringing.
The complicity between the women in the family is supportive and builds a safe and loving environment for Aenar and the rest of the children.
Until, on occasion, you decide to take Aenar to the majestic Targaryen-Hightower mansion. The incredible residence becomes a second home for him, who explores every corner with curiosity and becomes familiar with the new walls.
Aegon, as the older brother he is, becomes his second protective figure. Together they share adventures through the mansion's extensive gardens and enjoy playing with Legos blocks or his plastic carts.
With Helaena, she connects with Aenar through her charm and utterly beautiful aura, always playing with him, carrying him in her arms and telling him fantasy stories with gestures and figures.
And with Daeron, Aenar loves it when he watches his favorite cartoons with him. Also eventually Aenar becomes his weakness, as he always fills him with more toys and always thinks of him to give him everything that makes him happy, even food.
And when Aenar cries, Daeron is the first of the siblings to come to him, slightly concerned and immediately wanting to make him feel good.
Meanwhile, your relationship with Aemond, while not resuming the romance of the past, transforms into a serene, enjoyable and respectful one. Aenar's upbringing becomes the main point of building his future and lacking nothing.
Although memories of the painful past persist, both have learned to cope and accept it, in order to move forward.
And eventually, in a significant moment and one that lasted hours of conversation between Aemond and you, also one that was an arduous process of documentation and much waiting, a culmination of a stage of your life is realized that further solidifies the unique connection between Aenar, Aemond and you.
A recognition that brings with it a clear message of commitment and love for the future of your family. The significant moment when Aemond asks for your permission to legally recognize his child and you allow him to do so.
It was not something you had to think about too much, as Aemond has shown you so much and the emotion in his eyes through his tears when you said yes, only further confirmed the fact that you were not making a wrong decision.
And everyone in the family celebrates when Aemond's last name is added to your son's name and he is finally named Aenar Targaryen.
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general taglist:
@imaegonstargaryenswife0 @bellstwd @gibbsgirl7 @toodlesxcuddles @imsoshygirl @croatianprincess @gemini-mama @a-little-roony-mara @mysteris-things @zenka69 @at-a-rax-ia @fan-goddess @duds31 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @eternally-passionate @bellaisasleep @ttkttt @aemshaircare @mellowdreamlandpost-blog @noodle81937 @mooncalvin @queenofshinigamis @n4tforlife @vexladin @dixie-elocin @wotcherpeak @watercolorskyy @shiny-trashs-blog @strangersunghoon @elysian0612 @skzenhalove @iloveallmyboys @cakescupcakesminicookies
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Note
Heyyy I just read that kimi fiction, it was sooooooo good!!! EXACTLY what I was hoping for!
I was hoping u could do another one with him? In this one they have dating rumors surrounding them but they don't know that and then when they get asked about it one day in an interview, reader is like "what!?! No never" but kimi already liked her for a while and a few months after the interview he asked her out. It took him a while to convince hey but she says yes eventually and then after a looooong while of dating after they go public. When reader is asked abt it in an interview she's like "oh you know ppl change" or smth like that?
Its OK if u don't want to but if u do that would be amazing especially since ur last kimi fiction was superb!!
Thanks!!!
Two Sides of Honesty - Kimi Räikkönen
Driver!reader x McLaren!Kimi
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Despite his fairly quiet persona, people might mistake Kimi as not being confident or a happy man. He is very happy, very confident and actually the man is undervalued for his ability to out deliver everyone with his fashion. Whether it be his natural style or McLaren know how to dress their drivers, the world isn't sure but the man is gorgeous and easily out dresses the other drivers with seemingly minimal effort.
He's also got very close to the young Sauber driver who has joined the grid.
They bloomed a friendship. But...
"Kimi and I? Dating? You're talking about Kimi Räikkönen. Absolutely not. He is...a very nice man and we are good friends but that slap we are." Y/n stresses as she stands in the interview, laughing lightly at the mere suggestion.
Most might assume she'd take offence to the idea. Since she's the only woman on the grid, the only woman deemed of high enough skill to compete with men, a lot people would think she'd be angered that someone would assume she'd just start dating another driver.
But actually she sees nothing wrong with that idea. However, Kimi is a friend. Not a boyfriend.
"That's a shame, the two of you would be the best looking couple in F1."
"Well, thank you. I think we'll have to settle for best looking friends in F1." Y/n laughs before finally being allowed to withdraw from the media pen away from the microphones and large cameras capturing her words.
Her presence in F1 has been nothing short of being in the harshest spot light, as if she's an ant under a microscope of a child who has just learned the power of sunlight with a magnifying glass can be quite destructive. They're waiting to burn her under the harsh light.
-
The next day y/n finds herself in a press conference with none other than the McLaren driver himself.
They largely ignore the questions when not aimed at them, and even when they are, the would actively dodge trying to answer them.
Kimi had heard of her amusement over the suggestion of them dating and while it didn't necessarily provoke feelings of anger. He had to admit to himself, he'd hoped they might date at some point. Specifically some point soon.
Eventually they leave and Kimi finds y/n has linked their arms, her way of silently telling him that she wants to keep talking. He's not even sure she does it consciously or if it's a quirk of hers that he's picked up on during the growth of their friendship.
"I saw that you got asked about if we were dating." Kimi comments once he knows they've drifted off from the ears of others and eyes of people pushing for knowledge of exactly what they are.
"You saw that?"
"Yes."
Y/n looks at him for a moment not really sure where this is going.
"We should go on a date." Kimi declares making her look at him.
"Kimi Räikkönen. I am not feeding into a narrative just to please the masses. We are friends, very good friends. We shouldn't risk ruining that because someone else said we'd look good together." Y/n smiles sadly then sighing. "I don't think it would be smart."
"Don't think then." Kimi tries knowing he's just been rejected but he's not quite willing to fall short on expectations of himself yet.
"You are a wonderful friend, Kimi. I have things to do, important things. And so do you. I will see you later." Y/n smiles kissing either cheek and then moving back.
She knows Kimi is more strong-willed to allow himself to be rejected like this. But she doesn't want to be asked out on the motivation that she'd said she wouldn't date him. If he really genuinely wants this then she wants to see if he's willing to ask more than once, although he hardly asked. More suggested.
"I will see you later, y/n." Kimi states, never one to get his voice too loud even when she's growing ever more distant.
-
Y/n founds herself having gone from a friend who Kimi may have been withholding feelings towards to being the centre of his attention and finding herself given endless gestures, gifts, notes and almost always in his company while she has the free time.
"You know...you are causing the rumours to set a light." Y/n teases as they sit up in the grandstand, hiding from their trainers and teams in favour of enjoying the sun that is baking the track and overheating everyone in attendance. No fans here because it's only Thursday.
"Would you accept us going on a date?"
Y/n sighs looking up at the sun almost as if blinding herself will allow her the refuge of not answering that question.
"Kimi, I don't want to go on dates." Y/n states closing her eyes and hearing a sigh of defeat. "I don't want to go on dates, because I like how we do things now...but..."
"But?"
Y/n isn't sure she's ever heard the Iceman sound so hopeful as if he's never wanted something so badly. He's an F1 driver, she knows the thing they all want the most is a championship title under their name. Preferably multiple titles.
But it almost sounds like he wants her more.
"But I think being in a relationship with you...maybe kissing and sleeping together and just being happy together like this but with more. I don't think I can keep lying and saying I don't want that." Y/n admits, the bright spot burned into her cornea slowly fading as she looks at Kimi who is almost blank. "I think we've been on dates without calling them dates, Kimi. You don't need to ask for us to keep doing what we've been doing for months now."
Y/n sighs doing what only feels right to seal the deal. To give them both the reassurance that this is the right thing to do.
She shifts herself shamelessly into his lap, knowing there's a chance of cameras hidden somewhere capturing this. Most of the drivers are able to be in relationships without it being a big deal.
But two drivers-two rivals dating, that will be in the headlines.
Luckily the kiss gives them both what she was looking for. Because it's no sparks flying like in some book or movie, it's a settling warmth, like he just flicked a switch of something that feels right.
-
Y/n stopped caring so much to hide, Kimi has taken pride in silently showing her off. He smiles more, he steals kisses and he has melted in the eyes of the media and fans from his icy persona.
Though y/n constantly wonders about what they might really think if they knew exactly how soft he is without an audience. Not that he talks much more than he does in public, but that's how Kimi is and she'd not change anything about him.
"Y/n...I thought that you'd said you and Kimi were just friends and it'd be remaining that way." The interviewer states making her smile looking back over at Kimi who is further away from her but in the media pen doing his own interviews.
"Well I guess I was wrong. That happens sometimes." Y/n shrugs softly earning grins from everyone behind the camera.
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rmsrkive · 8 months
Text
unconditionally (03) — jung hoseok
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summary: for the past three, almost four years, it has only been you and your twins after having been abandoned by your ex-boyfriend. you expected it to remain that way for the rest of your lives until one day you accidentally run into one of his bandmates at the park
pairings: ex-boyfriend/baby daddy!hoseok x f. reader (exes to lovers)
warnings: none
rating: pg-13
word count: 5025
taglist [closed]: @darkphoenix5037 @mushroom-main @partyparty-yah @persnyako @violetpenguinkris @loveforred @thedarkeside @coffeewanderer @inlovewithallmusic @deejay08 @cryinginmyroomsposts @ilikekpop-c @aloverga @as-hs-blog @bangtanlovesk @mintchocoss @hopeonysus @smoltika @jjkluver7 @earth2joon @oricephany @ayoo-bangtan @honsoolgloss @shadowyjellyfishfest @nochuel @addictedtohobi @renoirgoh @btsfluffsworld @scuzmunkie @bellamuerte1987 @strawbi-reads @secfir @missmischief1408 @savage-aespa @bts-dream @mixedfandxms
masterlist
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The Bangtan members had never sat in such an uncomfortable atmosphere in their lives. They powered through countless interviews, fan meets, dinners, and meetings, yet not a single one of them could hold a candle to the tension that filled the room as Jung Hoseok glared at his brothers. Seokjin and Namjoon managed to convince Hoseok to not ask any questions about what he overheard and kept his anger at bay during the car ride back to the dorms.
They should have been more careful about their surroundings after you and Joshua left them behind in the parking garage. After a recording session, Hoseok stayed back at HYBE for a meeting with the managers but it had been canceled due to one of them being sick. He expected the other members to have left but was pleasantly surprised to see them still in the parking garage. His excitement, however, disappeared when he heard Seokjin mentioning your name, something he hadn't heard in four years.
"Before you get mad, let us explain," Taehyung began.
"Explain what? That you guys believe that Y/N's kids are actually mine? You know she cheated on me so I don't understand why you guys are suddenly believing that she didn't." Hoseok snapped.
"How do you know she cheated?"
Hoseok's head snapped towards Jin, rage building up at the question and his tone. "What?"
"How do you know she cheated?" Seokjin continued, crossing his arms over his chest. "Do you have any proof, Hoseok? Because as far as I know, you made these baseless accusations about Y/N and never actually showed anybody evidence that she really did cheat."
"Because we never fucked without a condom. I would never be that careless especially when our career was in the middle of taking off. The last thing I needed was a baby tying me down and Y/N was well aware of how well we were doing. Our relationship was already rocky from my busy schedule so she probably went and fucked another guy but told me it was my baby when she found out she was pregnant."
Hearing Hoseok's explanation the second time around was much more different than the first time. When they first heard it, Taehyung and Jungkook immediately clung to his words as if they were gospel. That's why it was so easy for them to cut you off. Jimin, on the other hand, believed Hoseok but struggled to end your friendship because he loved you so dearly. Now that they were hearing the explanation once again, it sounded ridiculous to their ears. They didn't understand how or why they believed him because his reasoning was baseless.
"Condoms aren't effective one hundred percent of the time, you know that right? Any form of contraception doesn't guarantee the prevention of a pregnancy. Even birth control prevents pregnancies only ninety-nine percent of the time so there is still the slightest bit of chance that birth control wouldn't be able to stop a pregnancy. The only way to be sure that Y/N wasn't going to get pregnant was abstaining from sex." Seokjin raised his eyebrows.
"Why are you telling me this?" Hoseok snapped. "I know how all of this works."
"If you know how all of this works then why are you trying to use condoms as an excuse that the kids are not yours? You're not proving anything by saying that. You're just making yourself look like a damn fool because you're scrambling around for excuses as to why Y/N was pregnant."
Hoseok was astonished at how Seokjin was defending you. He was coming to the realization that he had never been on his side the entire time and that he was just pretending to be angry all these years. "Why the fuck are you defending her? There's a higher chance that Y/N cheated on me than a condom not working so I don't know why you're adamant on siding with her. You didn't say any of this when we broke up three years ago so why are you bringing it up now?"
"Because you're a fucking idiot, Hoseok." Seokjin spat. "I haven't been on your side from the start because the lack of evidence and refusal to listen to what Y/N had to say is ridiculous. I only cut ties with her out of respect for our friendship. I wasn't going to choose an ex-girlfriend over somebody I consider my brother and I guarantee you I'm not the only one who thinks this way. You're in the wrong, Hoseok, and deep down inside you know that too. Open your eyes and grow up. It's about time you take responsibility for your actions and apologize to Y/N for the way you treated her."
The room fell silent with the exception of Seokjin's heavy breathing. He rarely got mad at the members and tried his best not to let his anger speak for him as it would be detrimental to the group but three years of pent-up emotions was bound to come out.
"If I were her, I wouldn't forgive you even if you spent the next three years groveling to make up for the time that you weren't there to support her with your kids. Get over yourself, Hoseok."
Without giving Hoseok the chance to say a word, Seokjin stormed out of the dorm, slamming the door shut behind him. The other members stared at the door, the room rattling from the force of it closing. The tension in room the grew tenfold, leaving everybody shifting in their seats uncomfortably while Hoseok cursed Seokjin out.
The breakup between you and Hoseok ran much deeper than they thought.
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“Noona!”
You let out a shriek and dropped the stack plastic cups you were hugging to your chest on the ground, whipping your head to see who was calling you.
Mingyu, Seokmin, and Minghao skidded to a stop in front of the counter, seemingly panicked and out of breath. Their panicked expressions worried you, causing you to ignore the dropped cups.
"What's wrong? Did something happen?"
They frantically nodded, shooting each other worried glances before looking back at you. An uneasy feeling settled in your stomach as you waited for them to explain, knowing there was only one reason for their panic.
“The three of us hung out with Jungkook last night and he told me some pretty startling things about Hoseok and the rest of the group." Mingyu began grimly. "Hoseok overheard their conversation about you after Shua hyung walked you to your car in the HYBE parking garage a few days ago. It caused a big fight between him and Seokjin hyung so they haven't been on speaking terms since."
You furrowed your eyebrows together. Seokjin and Hoseok had gotten into a fight about the other members bumping into you? What could they have possibly fought about if the pair had been on the same page since the breakup? "They're in a fight right now? What happened?" You asked.
"Apparently Seokjin hyung never wanted to cut ties with you nor did he believe that you cheated on Hoseok hyung. Seokjin hyung was upfront with him about the fact that he had no excuse to accuse you of cheating when he had no evidence about his claims. Obviously Hoseok hyung got mad because he was defending you so now it's a mess between the group right now. Yoongi hyung sided with Seokjin but the rest are neutral." Seokmin further explained.
"But that's not the concern right now, noona." Minghao frowned, glancing behind him as if he was waiting for somebody to peek through the windows. "Hoseok hyung has been trying to find you since the fight."
"What?!"
Your mouth hung open at the new bit of information received, unable to believe you were hearing. You glanced between Seokmin and Mingyu, who nodded grimly. You sighed deeply before dropping your head into your hands, your elbows falling against the countertop before you let out a loud groan. Mingyu immediately reached out to rub your back gently, a frown etched across his face.
"Is there any way we can help you, noona?" Seokmin asked. "We can hire security if you feel unsafe. The last thing we want is for you to feel unsafe in your own home and cafe knowing that Hoseok hyung is trying to find you."
You shook your head as you stood upright again. "No, it's fine. If Hoseok ends up showing up here or at my house, I have no issue dealing with him. He's not the type to lash out or anything so I'm not worried. I just don't want him seeing the twins or anything like that."
One thing about Hoseok was that he was not a violent person. He wasn't the type of boyfriend to lash out and make you scared whenever the two of you got into small fights and even when you two broke up, you didn't worry about being in harm's way. The only concern you had was that he would show up at the cafe and get a glimpse of the twins while they were hanging out with you and your employees while you were walking.
"We're sorry, noona." Minghao said quietly. "These past few weeks have been an absolute shit storm and we can't imagine how overwhelmed you're feeling."
You gave them a tired smile, grateful for all that the three of them had been doing since you ran into Jungkook at the park. They had been nothing but patient and kind with you, doing their best to provide updates about Hoseok based on what Jungkook was telling them. And it seemed like the maknae was contacting his friends more often than not, particularly Mingyu. "It's okay, I appreciate everything you guys are doing and have been doing. It means a lot that you guys care about me and the twins."
"Of course, noona. We're family. We would do anything for you." Seokmin smiled.
That was the issue with the Seventeen members sometimes; they would quite literally do anything for you that it made you wonder, what exactly would they do for you and how far would they go?
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"I come bearing gifts."
You looked up from the countertop you were wiping down to see Joshua walking in with a bag in his hand. In the other hand, you saw the keys to your cafe dangling from his hands, causing you to roll your eyes at how he let himself inside despite the cafe being closed.
"Gifts?" You echoed, gesturing for him to take a seat on one the stools.
"For the twins." He replied, digging through the bag to show you what he purchased. "I went shopping with Myungho today and got carried away when we passed the kid's section. I bought a new outfit for each of the twins and a stuffed animal."
"Jisoo."
You frowned as you looked at the matching outfits he purchased for Jaehee and Jaeyoung, the frown only growing bigger as you stared at the matching Jellycat stuffies as well. You stared at the bok choy and cauliflower that were smiling at you, unsure if the twins even knew what either vegetable was. "What did I say about buying gifts for the twins?"
"You didn't say anything," Joshua argued. "Besides, the twins are like my babies too. Can't I buy something for them every once in a while?"
You scoffed, "By every once in a while, do you mean every other day?"
He pouted, yes pouted, and stared at the cauliflower sadly. "Is it bad that I want to spoil them?"
"Yes, Joshua. I don't have room for new stuff anymore because you, Eunae, and the rest of the Seventeen members go on a shopping spree every time you step foot in a mall. Not that I'm not appreciative of everything you get for the twins but I feel bad."
"Well, you shouldn't feel bad because we love the twins just as much as you do. Maybe even more."
Joshua laughed, putting his hands up in surrender as you smacked him with the rag you cleaned the counters with, smiling as you went on an angry rant about how it wasn't possible for anybody to love their kid more than their mother. A father, perhaps, but none of them were the father of your twins, now were they?
"Why are you bothering me after hours, Joshua?" You asked. "You should've gone to Eunae's apartment because she and Seungcheol are with the twins."
"Because I wanted to see you, silly. It's lonely closing up so I decided to keep you company." He smiled.
You smiled back at him. "How about you be of good use and taste test some drinks I have prepared for the summer menu?"
"You just released the spring menu."
"It doesn't hurt to prepare in advance."
Joshua sat patiently as you made several drinks for him to try, ranging from different flavor ades, to fruit teas, to even smoothies. He rated everything on a scale of 1-10, though it didn't help much because he rated every single drink a ten. He insisted that all of the drinks were made perfectly but you were still skeptical because they were random drink recipes that you had thrown together.
"Owning a cafe is really your calling, Y/Nie. I don't think there's a single bad thing on your menu." Joshua praised as he took another sip of the peach ade you just handed him.
You rolled your eyes with a fond smile on your face. "You're just saying that because we're friends."
"No, I really mean it. I don't think there's a cafe I love more than yours. Every single drink and food is good with a reasonable price, the entire place is clean and cozy, the customer service is excellent, what more can people ask for?"
Sometimes you wished you were in love with Joshua instead.
As you watched him gush about your cafe, you couldn't help but smile at him endearingly while nodding along to his words. He was such a kind and gentle soul and you were always going to be grateful that you met him through Seungcheol. He had been nothing short of an angel since you met him and you found yourself wishing more often than not that he had been the one you fell in love with. He was wonderful with the twins, treating them as if they were his own kids, and genuinely loved spending time with the three of you. If he had been the one you fell in love with, you were sure that you be happier than you had ever been. You were sure your life would be much easier if he was the person you woke up to every morning and the person you fell asleep beside every night.
Not to say that you weren't happy with Hoseok, but you could have avoided a lot of heartbreak and pain if you never met him in the first place. But it was inevitable considering that you two met in high school and began dating even before he debuted in BTS. A seven-year friendship and a five-year relationship were hard to forget, no matter how much Hoseok hurt you when he broke up with you all those years ago.
You were selfish, yes, for thinking such a thing about Joshua but you had hope when the two of you dated for a month and a half before ending things because you both figured it would be for the best. You truly believed during the month and a half that Joshua was the one for you before you came to the nasty realization that part of you were still in love with Hoseok and that you always would be in love with Hoseok.
It also didn't help that Joshua was also stuck in a messy situation, where had been on and off with one of his childhood best friends. During the brief moment the two of them weren't friends, Joshua asked you out because he was sure that you were the one he truly wanted. As lovely as you were, he was still hung up on the girl he grew up with, much like how you were still hung up on Hoseok. Both of you let the other down gently, breaking up on mutual terms yet remaining good friends. Nobody apart from the two of you knew that you had dated for a month and a half and you intended to keep it that way. The last thing you needed was for Seungcheol and Soonyoung to get on your ass for not telling them and for the rest of the group to be upset that they had never known. It would cause far too many problems and quite frankly, the last thing you wanted to deal with was a sulky Seventeen.
Sometimes you wished you were in love with Joshua instead. And sometimes you wished he was in love with you too.
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By the time you had fed Joshua a sufficient amount of summer menu items, it was already nighttime. You overstayed your welcome at the cafe and left the twins with Eunae much longer than you anticipated so you were itching to pick them up and head home for the night. Though you would've left much sooner if Joshua hadn't argued with you for fifteen minutes about taking you home as if you didn't have your own.
"Are you sure you'll be fine closing up on your own?" Joshua frowned.
"Yes, Josh, I promise I'll be fine." You answered.
"I can drive you home and drop you off here in the morning, it's no issue for me."
You simply smiled and kissed your hand before smacking his forehead. "I'm fine, Joshie, I swear. I'll text you when I get home. Drive safely, okay?"
"Okay." He reluctantly complied. "Good night, Y/N."
"Good night."
You waved goodbye, watching him drive away before turning around to head back into the cafe. You happily hummed to yourself, satisfied with how well the day went before you abruptly paused in your steps. You noticed a figure standing inside which would have startled you had you not immediately recognized the figure that was observing the interior.
“Hoseok?”
At the sound of his name, he yanked off his mask and pulled the hood of his jacket off revealing his face to you for the first time since the breakup. Your breath hitched at the sight of his face, feeling your heart drop as the two of you held eye contact.
Hoseok was still as beautiful as you remembered him being four years ago. Granted, you did see him plastered all over billboards, buses, train stations, and other sorts of advertisements over the years but none of them held a candle to his beauty in real life. He appeared much more mature than he did before, his baby fat completely gone which allowed for his facial features to be more defined. His hair was back to its natural color, which had always been your favorite while you guys dated. He was always testing out new hair colors and while he suited every single one, you loved his dark hair the most. As you stared at Hoseok in silence, it felt like you were falling in love with him all over again.
"What are you doing here?" You asked cautiously, afraid he was going to abandon you again if you said the wrong thing.
"I came to see you." He replied quietly. "I have to talk to you about something."
Hoseok hesitantly came closer, stopping when he was a few feet away from you. He took your silence as an opportunity to take a look at you, wondering how much you changed since he broke up with you and how much you changed after the pregnancy. You're still as gorgeous as you were when he first broke up with you and the only thing that changed was that you looked exhausted. Despite the smile and laughs you shared with Joshua prior to his arrival, your shoulders were hunched the slightest bit and there was a permanent frown on your face. As he stared into your eyes, he could see the lingering sadness swimming around. Hoseok didn't pride himself in being able to easily reading people's emotions but he could still read you like an open book; that was how little you changed in the past four years. Or so he thinks.
He caught a whiff of your perfume as you untied the string of your apron and placed it across the back of a chair. It was the same fragrance you wore while the two of you dated, a perfume that he gifted (of many) you for your first anniversary. It was his favorite scent just as much as it was yours. You smelled of the farmer's markets that you dragged Hoseok to whenever the two of you were in the States, of peaches, jasmine flowers, cedar, and oak. Your perfume took him back to the late-night walks along the Han River before sharing a piping hot bowl of ramen or visiting an auntie at her tteokbokki and eomuk stand, it reminded him of the nights you stayed up together late into the night, talking about the futures you wanted. Getting married, moving out of Seoul, starting a family...the funny thing was that you two did start a family—just not together.
In the midst of doubts and uncertainty, there was one thing Hoseok knew for sure: he was still completely and utterly in love with you.
"What do you need to talk about?" Maybe it was stupid of you to be oblivious, but a part of you hoped that Hoseok wanted to talk you about something other than the twins. Although the chances were slim to none.
"Remember when you told me before we broke up that you were pregnant?" Hoseok asked.
You nodded your head slowly, already not liking the way the conversation was going. You did not want to talk about the twins, nor did you think today would be the day.
“I didn’t believe you because I was sure that the baby wasn’t mine. I know I have no right to ask you again, but is the baby really mine?”
One thing you appreciated about Hoseok was that he was self aware. He knew he had no right to be asking you about the child(ren) he left behind and you were glad that he acknowledged. But that didn’t brush past the fact that he hadn’t heard you out four years ago and all of the pent up anger was rushing back at once.
“Why, so you can call me a cheater again and leave me a second time?” You sneered.
Hoseok frowned, “No, I genuinely want to know.”
“And I genuinely want you to get the hell out of my cafe and never come back.”
“Excuse me?”
Hoseok should’ve seen your reaction coming. He really should’ve seen it coming after thinking about how you two ended things four years ago. A selfish part of him hoped that you would be open to talking to him, willing to find closure after all these years, and maybe even allow him to meet your kid. He was naive to think that getting back into your good graces would be easy.
"Did you ever really love me?"
Hoseok froze at your question, slowly turning his head up to look at you. His eyes flashed with fury, a wave of anger he had never felt washing over him. Were you really questioning his love after he spent a year chasing after you and remained loyal to you for five years? He almost gave up being an idol because he was afraid that it would change your relationship yet you were questioning whether or not he loved you. One thing Hoseok knew for sure was that he never stopped loving you.
"Watch what you say, Y/N." He warned in a low tone.
"How can you say that you loved me when you broke up with me so easily when I showed you the pregnancy? You didn't think twice about accusing me of cheating and didn't give me a single chance to defend myself! You assumed that I cheated based off of no evidence! When have I ever given you a reason to lose your trust in me? I have known you before you debuted, Jung Hoseok and I stayed by your side every step of the day. All of those days and nights I spent alone with little to no contact should've pushed me to that you were the one cheating on me but I still thought the best of you and never even thought about the fact that you were cheating. Even to this day, I don't think that. Is that how little you think of me? That just because I had an accidental pregnancy it meant that I cheated on you? Don't tell me to watch what I say when you gave me countless reasons to doubt your love for me!”
The last thing you wanted was to give Hoseok the satisfaction of making you cry but you couldn't stop the tears that burned your eyes from falling down your face. The mix of anger, hurt, and sadness was seeping through your veins, and you were beginning to feel overwhelmed by the situation. The cafe had more customers than usual after several Seventeen members had been caught buying drinks and pastries a few days ago so the exhaustion of working all day was hitting you harder than usual. Having Hoseok show up out of the blue and try to pick a fight with you was pushing you over the edge. You felt your patience wear thin throughout the day but now you reached your breaking point.
"Do me a fucking favor and stay the hell away from me and my kids, okay? We were fine for the past three years without you and we'll continue to be fine. You don't get to come barging into my cafe demanding that I let you see my kids as if you aren't the one who chose to leave me at the start of my pregnancy."
"If you don't let me see the kids, I'll take you to court, Y/N."
Your head snapped up at his threat, your anger rising to a level you had never felt it reach before. "What the fuck did you just say?"
"I'll take you to court," Hoseok repeated. "I have a right to see my kids, Y/N. You don't get to keep them from me just because you're still angry over something that happened three years ago. I have all the money in the world to hire the best lawyers so you can try all you want to keep them from me."
You laughed coldly, astounded by the audacity of his claims. "You have a right to see my kids? You broke up with me the minute I showed you the pregnancy test and accused me of cheating with no proof that I actually did. You also refused to take a paternity test when that alone would've proved that the twins are your kids. You haven't paid child support, you blocked me on every form of communication, and you told your bandmates to cut contact with me yet you want me to let you see the twins? The court isn't going to side with you, Hoseok. It doesn't matter how much money, power, or fame you have because even the best lawyers can’t help grant you any sort of custody or visitations over the kids when you've been a deadbeat father for three years." You spat, backing him up against the counter.
Hoseok remained silent, struggling to keep his emotions at bay. He was angry that you were refusing to let him meet your kids despite the fact that he was finally showing interest in meeting them. Isn't that what you wanted? For him to finally be a father to your kids? The hatred raging in your eyes was a stab in the heart. Never had you ever looked at him with so much loathe and disgust, and he was coming to the realization of exactly how much he fucked up. The damage done to your relationship was beyond repair and he was sure that he was never going to see you or the twins again. Most of all, he felt guilty and sorry that he had left you alone for three, almost four years. The thought of you going through the pregnancy, birth, and raising them alone made his stomach turn. He felt sick and was disgusted by his actions.
“I spent nine months alone, pregnant with twins, and spent another three years alone raising them. I had no nobody to help me when I woke up vomiting for three months because of morning sickness. I had to work for nearly eight months on swollen feet and a sore back because I didn’t have any money to be able to take time off of work to raise my kids. I drove myself to the hospital when I was in labor and was alone when I gave birth to them. I was scared, Hoseok, fucking terrified because the second you broke up with me, I knew that I would have to raise a child on my own without any support from the people around me. You have some nerve to come into my cafe and demand to see the kids you chose to abandon."
Tears stung Hoseok's eyes as he stared into your teary yet furious eyes, his vision blurring. Your eyes remained cold despite noticing the way he was tearing up, feeling no sense of remorse or pity for the man in front of you. Hoseok had taken the ability to feel anything but anger and resentment toward him years ago.
"You wanna go to court? Then let's go to court, Hoseok. I have no problems spending months paying lawyers to watch you be given absolutely no custody or visitation rights over the twins."
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