#i don’t want to grow up

[gods-country024]

it feels so scary, getting old

#gods country #my pics #american gothic #americana #rural new england #small town #growing up #new england gothic #regional gothic #gothic americana #massachusetts gothic #southern gothic #photography #canon photography #i don’t want to grow up #rural #rural decay #abandoned #abandoned playground #we used to be kids

[mentalyardbelongingprincess2]

baby if you loved me you’d call me your bunny

#coquette #coquette aesthetic #coquette trash #lizzy grant #coquettecore #lana del rey #girlblogging #lana del rey aesthetic #lana del ray aka lizzy grant #lana del rey lyrics #dollette core #dolly aesthetic #coqueta #dollycore #dolores #coquette dollete #sad coquette #pinterest girl #girlblog #pinterest #daddy issues #i don’t want to grow up #daddy i’m scared #tw violence

[kickerofelves]

Good Good Things — Descendents

#Descendents #good good things #I don’t want to grow up

[floralcavern]

It’s my birthday week.

Actual footage of what my party’s going to be like /j

#Birthday week #i don’t want to grow up #Birthday

[dearcharliebrown]

a sprout in a field of wildflowers

everyone moves on, but i am still here

everyone grows, but i am still here

it’s a bit lonely, to have the moon as my sole friend these days

i am stuck, my friend, in this wide massive field of wild flowers

each season, i watch them grow

as they bask under the glow of your beloved,

and sag under the cries of your longing,

i remain stagnant

unmoving, deeply rooted to the ground

each season, i watch them wither

as each of their leaves fall

and kisses the ground i lay,

i remain stagnant

unmoving, deeply rooted to the ground

i wonder, my friend, will i stay as a sprout as each season passes by?

even the soil i lay on changes,

sometimes it asks for too much, it drowned

sometimes it asks for too little, it meets its demise

but amidst all things, i lay still, still

a sprout in a field of wild flowers

oh, my friend, tell me

will i ever grow like one of them?

#writing #growing pains #adulthood #original poem #old poem i wrote a few months ago #i don’t want to grow up #i want to live like a wildflower #lightly lightly lightly

[scavenger-daily]

Crying and remembering how my mom used to comfort me when I’d cry so hard my head hurt. I was homesick then and I’m homesick now. She’s in the room next to mine. I was 4 and I was sad and I’m 15 and I’m still sad. Mom I’m sad can I sleep in your bed tonight

#poetry #web weaving #love #childhood #longing #growing up #nastolgia #mom #i love my mom #i don’t want to grow up #am i too old #I need to go to bed

[faszaakisshobbi]

i wish i didn’t have to leave people.

i wish i didn’t have to grow up.

people are so mean now.

i guess i’m a bit mean too, 

but i don’t try to be. it’s an accident. i promise.

i’m doing better now, but no one sees it. 

people are just so mean,

why can’t they see me?

#rant?? #i don’t want to grow up

[cyb3rrat]

i don’t think we talk about how emotionally damaging it is to come back to your childhood home to find your room transformed into the grandchildren room and you’re pushed to the guest room

#sad thoughts #childhood #i am still a child #give me my room back #mother issues #i don’t want to grow up

[socketz]

can’t stop thinking about that thing that people say about being young. you know the one where it’s like “you’ll never have friends again like you did when you were seventeen.” or something like that? yeah. i never thought much about it, didn’t think it was all that true, but nostalgia has gripped me tonight, and i realize that they’re right.

like yeah, i want to stay this way forever. can’t i stay like this? can’t we stay young, and dumb, with just enough dough to get us by? i think we could. i could hold them — these friends i’ll never have again — here tonight, and live like it forever. i could call in sick at work ‘cause i’m still drinking with them at seven in the morning. i could stay up all night talking about who did what, and what with who. i could laugh at her as she climbs the drainpipe into her room, or i could roughhouse him when i’m drunk ‘n’ rowdy. i could talk with them beneath the stars about things that won’t matter in the morning, but feel important in the moment. I could confess my feelings for her and blush as she laughs, and i could flirt with his older brother, and gush about it to her. i could be so young and stupid and happy. i could be that way forever.

and i miss it already, even if it’s only just begun. i mean, soon enough i’ll be here, and they’ll be there, and nothing will ever be the same again. and it’s alright. it happens. i know that. happens to everyone — that’s life, baby. but if i just finish up my drink, and dance with them some more, if i laugh and i sing and i live while i can; if i enjoy tonight, and tomorrow, and say ‘Laters!’ instead of goodbye, grinning and waving, with a ‘See you when I see you!’ maybe it will last forever. maybe these nights will stretch on for the rest of my life, and everything will be fine.

‘cause, hell, i don’t want to say goodbye. not yet. not now. not ‘til the time comes, when we’re crying and laughing with our faces all red, apologizing for getting so emotional. promising to call, promising to visit, promising that and this, ‘til all we know is radio silence and ‘Last Seen Three Years Ago’. god, i miss it already and it’s not even gone.

#nostaligiacore #I don’t want to grow up #don’t want to get old. #crying

[divbella]

how do i articulate the bicycle bell at the end of scott street by phoebe bridgers in words?

#phoebe bridgers #scott street #nostalgia #i miss being a kid #i don’t want to grow up #help i turn 18 next year #childhood aesthetic

[and-learn-to-let-go]

what’s the tumblr quote that goes “everything is about ghosts, except ghosts, which are about love”?

#AHHH EMOTIONS LEAVE ME ITS A TUESFAY #I brought my little brother to a coffee shop with me in between appointments #and i’m quickly realizing that in a year I may never have these interactions again #or that they may be few and far between #I don’t want to grow up #idk

[felescinsstuff]

druid

#illustration #druid #send help #i have mental illness #but idc #i don’t want to grow up #artists on tumblr #original art

[tizianapp]

i don’t want to grow up

#scary #i don’t want to grow up

[miss-saytr]

“Open at: FIVE!!!”

I would stare at the piece of printer paper on the door and check my phone until it hit five exactly. I would bounce my leg, I would look at my nails, I would pace around. But it was only for a few minutes. There was no one else waiting, so when it was five pm exactly, I opened the door.

I saw him a few yards down playing with… toy planes? He was making plane noises too, childish ones, making them crash into each other. This man had a suit and tie, and was as old as my father.

“I’m sorry, is this a bad time?”

“It’s five now, isn’t it? Sit down.”

He put his toy planes to the side on his desk and he would give me a smile. We talked awkwardly for the next few minutes about the industry, about how I felt like I wanted to give up. This is the time period I was born into but it’s all crashed and burned before I was ready to even get even a sliver of a chance that I can get my dream.

“How did you do it?”

He shrugged. I understood he never got what he wanted at first too, but back in the 90’s the chances of those dreams becoming a reality were significantly higher.

“And don’t say you knew someone, don’t say you were lucky, don’t say you kept coming back. Because I know to do all that stuff. I’ve heard it a million times.”

He nodded his head very lightly. Silence.

“And I know it was easier back then but I’m old enough for this now, and I wish I could go back in the past and live in a better world where hope feels real. But no, the universe said I had to be here right now and have this dream.”

Silence.

“Why don’t I just end it all? I mean, I’ve asked myself that when I was younger and stupid, but she had a point, didn’t she? If I can’t do anything about the fact that I was tossed into this industry because I loved it and found out it was greedy, selfish, expensive, apathetic…”

…

“Damnit, Tommy, are you even listening?”

I couldn’t see his face through the tears in my eyes. I wanted to give up. I wanted to cry. I wanted to magically put myself in the past or a better universe where hope feels like it could work.

He slowly swiveled his seat around to reach for one of his toy planes. He held it, looked at it for a bit, then turned to me.

“I think… you have to realize… that despite it being so important to you, I think your passion should keep you alive. I think…”

He was tapping his foot and fidgeting with his toy plane. He was saying all of this slowly, stumbling, trying to find the right words to say.

“I think you need to continue doing things for yourself. Max told me about you and you’re a good kid. He said you thought happiness was the meaning of your life. And I think if you believe that, you should continue to find it even if the world you came to is crumbling. I get it. But there are so many things that you enjoy too that you find purpose and happiness in, even if it doesn’t ‘benefit’ you. I’m sorry, I hope I’m making sense here.”

Wiping my eyes, I imagined myself punching Max in the face.

“I know you said you beat depression. Congrats! I’m sorry if I’m getting too personal. But I think I should tell you. I’m proud of you and you were the only one who showed up to see me here today. I think that says a lot about you. I think you should keep up that determination not just in your work, but what makes you happy.”

I wanted to hug him, but I felt strange. But I felt myself only thinking of replying in the form of a stupid, unrelated question.

“Were you playing with planes before I came in…?”

“Yeah! It makes me happy.”

#writblr #writer #writers on tumblr #writing #writers and poets #this was a long one #entertainment industry #writing industry #pitching #autistic artist #autistic writer #comfort #i don’t want to grow up #but I don’t want to live in the past #personal #gen z shit #gen z #gen z problems #we are doomed #I feel doomed #he was nice to me and I felt bad getting like that #why do I bother

[thecatisnothere]

i use kid toothpaste bc adult toothpaste doesn’t come in ‘slight bubblegum flavor’ and also I fear the constantly turning wheel of time

#toothpaste #i don’t want to grow up #death is inevitable #:( #I want silly toothpaste flavors

[kidswithyourvintagemusic]

i lie on my back on sweltering early autumn evenings like these and i feel the same way i did at seven years old in my grandparents’ living room at five in the morning. perfectly alone and out of step with time, but joyfully engrossed in whatever book i’d pulled from the smooth shelves. i wonder now how i’ve grown this quickly; how my edges have somehow expanded so much i can fit a lifetime of sadness within my frame. i know it’s been years. a decade nearly. but i don’t have words other than to say: i am her. that was yesterday.

#poem #i don’t want to grow up