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#i don't usually post art on here but i'm happy w how this turned out
reallyromealone · 2 years
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A A A A A A A A ITS MY BIRTHDAY! WHOOP WHOOP o(≧∇≦o)
Firstly, before I request, I just wanted to say ever since I joined tumblr a few months ago and found one of your posts I just absolutely and instantly fell in love with your blog, like whatever you post just always had me giggling and kicking my feet, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH YOUR FICS HAVE ME IN A CHOKEHOLD SIR-
But anyways now that's out of the way... if I can, may I humbly request a Alpha Cyno x Omega reader nsfw with biting + creampie? And, if it's not too much, maybe some fluffy aftercare? Please and thank you. BUT MAKE SURE TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST! Im a patient lad UwU, SO DRINK WATER AND EAT SOME SNACKS !!
Also here is a offering for thy Queen Lily >w<
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Shiii
Happy birthday!
I showed lily the art and she likes it I think!
And I'm slowly accepting how much people like my writing lol
And you sure can!
Also I drink 1L water a day dw or 33 FL OZ
WARNING: MALE READER 🌸 OMEGAVERSE🌸DIRTY TALK 🌸CREAMPIE🌸 SMUT🌸NSFW
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Cyno never expected to fall in love with Lisa's assistant, the Omega absolutely thrilled to see the beautiful lands of Sumeru in it's full abundance.
Cyno liked that though the Omega was excited he was also very careful and thoughtful towards the land, taking pictures with his camera instead of taking a plant and never getting to close to the wildlife.
(Name) lay helpless under the white haired man, slick leaking from (name).
"You're gonna be a good boy right?" Cyno asked gently nudging (name)s legs apart to see his omegas cute cock and ass, watching (name) blush so prettily for him as his legs spread out for Cyno and Cyno alone.
"Such a good Omega..."
"Alpha..."
"What is it Omega?" Cyno said in his usual to the point tone, watching his mate squirm under his intense stare "p-please..." Poor (name) was teary eyed as he struggled to keep eye contact with the other "what? Come on use your words for me" Cyno loved teasing the other, watching the normally hyper and inquisitive Omega turned into putty before him.
"P-please touch me..." He begged as another gush of slick left his cute ass "what do you mean? I am touching you" Cyno said rubbing (name)s thighs with a cocky grin, something (name) only saw in the bedroom and God did it make his brain fuzzy.
"T-touch my cock..."
"See baby, not so hard" Cyno said kissing (name) gently as he began slowly jerking (name) off and watching him fall apart as Cyno bit the omegas lip when pulling away "haven't even put my cock in and you're already cock stupid"
"Alpha..."
Cyno didn't respond as he stroked firmly up and down on (name)s cock, thumb rubbing the head and smearing pre cum around, (name) watched through teary and wet eyelashes as his alpha jerked him off, watching Cyno slowly move his head down to (name)s thighs and bite the flesh, the slight coppery taste of blood on Cynos tongue.
The sound of (name)s moan and the Omega bucking into hus hand as he came was wonderful.
Cyno was bitey during sex, mainly due to his instincts to claim but (name) was very into it.
Cyno layed havoc on his thighs and hip, bite parks scattered everywhere.
(Name) was shaking and sobbing in pleasure by time Cyno came face to face with his leaking hole, the musky pharamones and the strong aroma of (scent) making Cyno almost go feral.
Removing his hand from (name)s cock and giving a soft growl when (name) whined he sat up on his knees and pulled (name)s lower half higher and legs bent into (name)s chest, head resting by Cynos lap/knees.
Spreading the others ass open he marvelled at the sight before taking a long lick and letting out the filthiest groan ever at the taste.
"Touch yourself" Cyno commanded as he held (name) still so the Omega wouldn't wiggle around while he ate his meal.
His tongue dipped in when (name) began gently stroking his own cock, watching (name) shake at the invasion.
Cyno swirled his tongue inside (name)s right little ass, the slick helping loosen it a bit as he kept his eyes on (name).
Slack jaw and panting (name) babbled nonsense, taking what Cyno gave him and letting him manhandle him like a ragdoll.
Like his good Omega.
When Cyno moved him again, (name) was on his side still touching himself as his leg was bent up into his outer waist, cumming when Cyno added a finger and began fucking his little omegas ass, watching him carefully.
"You like that?" Cyno asked heavily as he added another finger and scissored, watching the others ass stretch and slick leak out.
(Name) nodded as he let out a whiny cry "words Omega" he said deeply and bending over to bite (name)s shoulder blade "y-yes!"
"Yes what?" Another nip.
"Yes alpha!"
"Good boy"
Cyno fucked his fingers hard, fucking into the others prostate as (name) was beyond overstimulated but didn't want it to end.
Cynos callused fingers felt heavenly after all.
"So stretched and ready for alpha" Cyno said awe struck as he rubbed his cock against the others slick asshole to lube himself up "you ready baby?"
"P-please fill me up"
And what monster could deny that?
Cyno gently pushed his cock into (name)s tight heat, the other practically pulling him in, cock pressed up against the omegas prostate "fuck..." Cyno lost composure as he began pistoning his hips without any hesitation, balls slapping against (name)s own and the omegas wet ass cheeks.
"God baby, gonna fuckin' ruin this pretty little ass"
"Pleasepleasepleaseplease"
Cyno moved him into a mating press and bit the others chest, before biting his way up to the others neck, licking the mating bond that he placed months ago "gonna fill you up with my cum"
"Alphaalphaalpha!" (Name) was babbling, cock drunk as he pulled Cyno impossibly closer and tugged his white hair that draped around (name) like a canopy as the Alpha moved to kiss him roughly, tongue pushing it and exploring, licking anywhere he could and pulled (name)s tongue into a tango of sorts, dominating everything he could as he fucked (name)s brains out.
"Fuck I'm close...."
"I-in me!" (Name) begged as Cyno looked at him wide eyed "really?"
"Pupupupup!"
Cyno was feral as he fucked with everything he had, burying his face in (name)s neck and biting the scent gland harshly as he came and knotted in (name), most definitely knocking him up.
"Mmmm" (name) was a mess as he came one final time, body shaking as he came out of his Omegan state and Cyno was ready.
"Such a good boy, letting alpha creampie you" Cyno said kissing (name) gently, petting his damp forehead "you did amazing I'm so proud of you"
(Name) purred as he took in the sweet praise "alpha..."
"Alpha will take care of you"
When his knot died down he grabbed a water jug, a glass and a cloth.
"Drink for me" Cyno said gently putting the clay cup to the others lips "good boy" he whispered and watched (name) drink slowly.
"Gonna clean you up, then a nice bath"
(Name) was spacing out as he let Cyno moved his limbs like a doll, cleaning him if fluids.
"So good for me, let's take a bath my beloved"
"Love you alpha.."
"I love you too"
"Gonna be parents..."
"Yeah we are"
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wingsonghalo · 3 months
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by @cnnmonbimee! Thank you for the tag!! Read her awesome answers here!
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 66! More than I thought were on there tbh!
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? Uhhh apparently it's 684,757! Less than I thought!
3. What fandoms do you write for? In order of most fics to least: Ace Attorney, JSHK, My Hero Academia, Mob Psycho 100, Homestuck, Hunter x Hunter, Phineas and Ferb, and Supernatural. I've also written a lot of Pokemon stuff, but somehow that has escaped Ao3 despite it being my longest fandom LOL. Working on a Pokemon SV one currently though 👀
4. What are your top five fics by kudos? Project: Matchmakers (shocker, I know), Sleep (Too) Tight (It's always been slowly but steadily popular), Force of Habit (bit of a surprise there honestly), Project: Matrimony (less surprising), and The Stuff of Dreams. So what I am seeing here is that no one leaves kudos on my JSHK or MP100 or MHA fics :') Some of these fics are one-shots, so it's kind of surprising! I wish PlayWright had gotten more attention; that fic killed me while I was writing it. I'm not giving number of kudos because I'm not comfortable with that and it makes me feel bad about myself haha,,,
5. Do you respond to comments? I try to! I've fallen behind on responding to them in the past 2 years or so because life has been so busy, though…
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably A Practice, For Now?? LMAO it's also my first JSHK and the one with the most kudos HMM COULD THIS FANDOM BE ADDICTED TO ANGST PERHAPS??! I don't write angst a lot!! What can I say, I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Almost all of my fics end happily, LOL. Pick any of them that actually has an ending.
8. Do you get hate on fics? Not commonly. I've gotten anon hate before about them on tumblr on rare occasions, but usually my comments on ao3 stay pretty nice.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do sometimes, but I'm so shy about it that I rarely ever post it /)//w//(\ Usually I just share it among friends, haha!
10. Do you write crossovers? Nope, and I never will!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yes. Someone tried to run Project: Matchmakers through a translator to hide the word matches and sell it as an ebook on Amazon, but they only bothered to hide it for chapter 1 so someone reported it to me and then in retaliation I started actually selling it on Amazon for the lowest price I could because the thief was trying to sell the shittier version for like 7 dollars LSFJ;AKLD. Read about the whole debacle here.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, quite a few! People have been great about asking me for permission! 💖
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, here and there! Usually it's either fics where I have written one part and someone else has written another scene, or someone had me look over something they'd written and I added so much commentary or threw additional ideas at them so much that the story ended up changing and I somehow became a co-author, LOL.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Oh my god don't make me answer that ;alskdjfl;k. If I wrote a fic for them ever, they're my favorite. I have so many favorites that I've never written fics for, too.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? THE UNDERCOVER FIIIIIC [sobs] and also Left on Read hnnngh
16. What are your writing strengths? Emotions!! I'm super good at those! I'm also really strong at dialogue and banter, and making my writing kinda witty/funny.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? Describing settings ;w; I write my scenes like I draw my art: in Descriptionless Blank Voids lkas;dlkf. I also struggle with the flow of action scenes sometimes, though I think they usually turn out okay if I spend enough time on them. I also probably use too many adverbs and adjectives, but y'know what? Fuck it I like my descriptive words thank you very much
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? As long as you're checking that it means what you think it means, or possibly asking a native speaker if you're unsure about context or need a sensitivity reader, I think it's fine. It annoys me if I have to check a footnote every other line, but if you can mostly understand it without a translation in context, it can be kinda nice! At least it says you're trying more than phonetically spelling out an accent, which--remember, kids!--is always cringe! 👍
19. First fandom you wrote for? On Ao3, it was Homestuck. On the internet in general, it was Animal Crossing and Pokemon, LOL.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Don't make me cHOOSE BETWEEN MY BABIESSS 😭 I dunno man! Project: Matchmakers is my magnum opus, but the PlayWright is lowkey kind of a masterpiece, I love so many of my JSHK fics to bits and pieces, a lot of my MP100 and MHA fics are very special to me, I've been trying to write a HxH one for YEARS and have poured my heart into making it beautiful, just UGHHH every single one of my fics I have vivid memories of conceptualizing and working on and most of them are my favorite to some degree!
I tag @carochinha, @kittykatz009, @toastytoaster22, @ittybittytoostormy, and anyone else who would like to answer these questions!!
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according2thelore · 3 months
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2023 top five!
@preseriesdean thought it would be fun for artists/authors/creators to post their favorite five creations this year, and i agree! it can be anything: your favorite posts, fics, art, edits, fanvids, anything!
i saw some folks turning this into a tag game, so here are some tags! @deanwinchesterpregnant @dyed-red @mercette @crucifysam @weirdbrothers @togethertogethersoulmates @pookeenpie
if you end up doing it, pls tag me! i'd love to see y'all's works! :)
-lizzy
so in no particular order, here are the five fics i liked the best/am the most proud of!
considering that everything i’ve written on this account (240k words of it good lord) was published since february 23rd, i’ve got a lot to work with!
i was in the fandom back in 2012-2013 until 2016-2017, and when i rewatched it recently with some friends, i realized just how many words and feelings had been broiling since. i wrote a LOT for spn back in the day (not published, just for the pure joie de vivre), but everything on the ao3 is completely new since feb!
1. tell me, why are you still so afraid?
or, the "what do you want, sam?" fic. this one might be a surprise! it did moderately well, but i'm really happy with it! i love writing weechesters/pre-series, and i hope this fic did them justice! it hit a lot of points i liked, and i had so much fun writing it!! i'm proud of it! :)
2. you're pretty when you don't speak
or, sam's wife pov. i was shocked!!! aghast!!! frankly agog!!! at how much folks loved this one! i had the idea in the shower of all places, lmao, just the idea that wait, being sam's wife must be so lonely. it was not the usual fare (and written in second-person pov), so i was expecting it to gently and quietly flop. but no! i wrote this fic in two sittings at one a.m. the night before a paleopathology exam, so i'm shocked any of it was coherent in the morning. thank you, dear reader, if you interacted w it at all! :)
3. romans 3:10-11
ahh, romans. to other folks that write, this was one of those fics that scratched in my bones until i sat down and wrote it all out. does that sound pretentious? it was stifling; it was all i could think about. even now, i look back on it and feel like there are things that are missing, extended scenes and extra themes that i wished i had teased out. the response was overwhelming and positive and i'm so glad you lot liked it! if you ever want more...idk...lemme know...
4. we didn't get it right, but love we did our best
or, the Heaven fic! this one took awhile to make, and a lot out of me to do! it's the longest fic i've made this year, by a lot! the planning process was a lot of fun (even though charlotte was mostly asleep), and i even colour-coded themes and turning points i wanted to include. the sense of accomplishment when it was done was a great part of this year!
5. there's no such thing as a clean break, when your heart starts bleeding out
or, the stanford!era fic where dean bleeds out on the highway and decides to not tell sam about it. one of my favorite things to write is a character getting more and more out of it as they lose control (or blood), and this one was a fun challenge! i love stanford!era dean, because he's so mangled and angry and sad. i feel like that one tweet that william shatner posted where he said ELECTROCUTE HIM!!! this also feels the most like the things i wrote back in 2014, so it brings nostalgia :,)
this was WAY harder than i thought! i loved and was so proud of so much of my work this year! a top ten would be easier, but i'm happy with this list!
thank YOU for reading! :)
we are holding hands now and there's nothing you can do to stop it. y'all keep this up and we might even have to stare lovingly into each other's eyes.
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lup-laguz · 1 year
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@ my last post tho, even if i can't do the whole "a piece for each month" thing i wanted, imma still do a little personal art-year-in-review because :3
so here's some of my favorite stuff i drew this year~
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one of my personal fave comfort ocs has,,,, a few similarities to sunny, you could say lol. anyways it's his fault that i realized drawing in the omori style is rlly fun, and also i rlly had fun drawing all these expressions for him
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same oc as above, but with some of my friends ocs who had a strong impact on him in the rp i used him in wayyy back when i was a teen (not always positive impacts on him tho ;3 ) usually i don't like sharing my traditional art as much as my digital stuff, but,,, this was just cute and also made me sad,,, i rlly like this one,,, <3
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not technically one of my most "high quality" arts but also it's my best artfight attack from artfight and i'm right. feat. labor9's sona and maybe a little surprise guest if you look hard enough c: (my one regret was not adding extra jokes in the youtube thumbnails tho. i wanted to but my wrist was killing me, so u-u)
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OK now for an actual high-quality artfight attacks,,, i see pretty dress design for white knight, i had to draw, and i'm ngl i'm so happy with how the soft colors turned out for this
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so i played mad rat dead around the time i got a new art tablet that came with free clip paint studio. so i needed subjects to test new art-y stuff with as i was playing mad rat dead. and honestly, rat god reminded me of a bitchy evil mousey oc of mine as well so twas cosplay time
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the cotton candy colors from racing into the night are just good m8
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...and drawing in omori art style? very fun! i wanna mess around with it a lot more this coming year, teehee
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i made two versions of this piece w/ an oc of mine, so take both because i think they're both neat and fun ^w^
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writertothemaximum · 1 year
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hiii i just wanted to say that your writing makes my day and it has always been delightful to read some of your pieces to the point i'm re-reading them ;o;;
do you mind if i ask what your writing process behind one shots and longfics are?
;w; omg thank you so much, the fact that you are taking the time to reread makes me so happy, I always wonder which pieces of my writing stand out to people more than others...It's useful info for me to continue improving, as well.
My process of writing longfic and oneshots is relatively similar, but with a few key differences!
(More under the cut)
For writing program, I just use Google Docs, but I have it a bit customized so it looks like this:
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The main thing that helps me is the dark mode, and the endless page, because I only post online, so page view doesn't really help me, much.
Either with longfic or oneshots, my inspirations usually come from art that I see, but I always try to think of a distinct "theme" whenever I write anything, and have every single point connect back to that "theme" or idea, no matter how trivial it is. This theme can be literally anything, but usually it's something like "I want to write about the different ways people handle loss of control" or "I think fingering buttholes is hot, so I'm going to try and make it as hot as I possibly can, so that other people can understand how hot it is."
I see characters as tools to tell a good story, and regardless of how much porn is there, it still needs to be a good story, you know! If you just wanted senseless fucking, why would you read it when you could go watch porn? I need to give the reader that reason.
I also really like to write themes that subvert expectations, or force the audience to see a new perspective that they might have not otherwise considered. My femdom works as an example of that, as I would often read femdom self-insert fiction I felt was......."wrong"? idk, it wasn't hot to me, and it didn't feel like my kind of femdom. So I put my skills to where my mouth was and! I think it turned out well!
So once I have that theme or general idea (and by this point, it's usually pretty easy to select/create the characters that fit that), I make a rough outline. For oneshots, this is usually just in my head, unless there's a really specific scene in mind? But for longfic, I plan out....a lot. Not everything, but my outline for Niki's (Morbid) Kitchen was around 5.5k before starting so uh.
My outline usually consists of bullet points so, it'll be like this:
-This is the location/conflict
>chara does something
"Hey, you should probably use this dialogue"
-this happens next (oh no)
Or something along those lines.
Then, after that, I just fill it all in!
Occasionally, I will write without an outline but uh...yeah it can get messy, so I prefer to use one.
I've been told that I edit as I go, and I usually reread as I write. I hate completed drafts sitting there, so I often miss a lot of stuff when I do a light proofread, so I apologize for any typos you've seen. Feel free to point them out in my comments or in an ask here.
When it comes to the prose itself, I write in third person limited, past tense so uh—Third person, but also from a character's perspective. I like to see it as them telling me the story.
Additionally, something that helps me a lot is to think about "Show, not tell," so if a character is stressed, instead of just. saying that they're stressed, they will cross their arms, their heartbeat increases, and they start saying meaner things. Something like that.
I like to think about how I, or people I know would react to a situation, and also what reaction would help connect best to that theme I decided at the beginning.
If you don't already know, I am working on a longfic called Niki's (Morbid) Kitchen, featuring Niki as a cannibal and Hiiro as a budding yandere. If you'd like to read it, you can here:
Well, I hope this gave you some insight, and thank you again for reading!
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lostspaceghost · 1 year
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J'ai publié 3 578 fois en 2022
C'est 2 298 billets de plus qu'en 2021 !
13 billets créés (0%)
3 565 billets reblogués (100%)
Les blogs que j'ai le plus reblogués :
@mushr0oman
@w--as-in-wolf
@araccoonthatlikesmurder
@thatgaydemigodnerd
@amazingakita
J'ai étiqueté 622 billets en 2022
#=] - 95 billets
#useful - 39 billets
#fishposting again - 31 billets
#me - 9 billets
#unreality - 9 billets
#tw bones - 7 billets
#important - 5 billets
#unreality tw - 4 billets
#long post - 4 billets
#so true prev - 3 billets
Longest Tag: 138 characters
#because a triacontakaipentagon would probably have a certain definite shape not just 35 sides like all shapes who have 6 sides are not hex
Mes billets vedette en 2022 :
n°5
Alright. I think I've processed the news now. I'm still very sad but I can finally just look back and smile at how incredible he was.
So sorry for spamming! He meant a lot to me since I had been watching him for almost 5 years now and he was my favourite youtuber and just a great human being.
My blog is mostly for memes, I don't even post about my hyperfixations on here, but I couldn't just stay silent about this. Normal activity will resume starting from now. I might still reblog the occasional fanart but you can now assume it's because I'm smiling fondly at old memories and not balling my eyes out.
Laugh, it's what he would have wanted =]
3 notes - publié le 1 juillet 2022
n°4
When you get this you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)❤️❤️❤️
Uh oh
Alright well... I like my eyes I guess I've gotten a few compliments about them over the years, my new hair; I recently got a haircut and I think it looks dope B] I like the fact that I'm pretty patient and I can stay calm even under pressure (at least on the outward), um.... I like how I can be myself without caring about what others think I've made a lot of progress on that front and also how I got over my debilitating social anxiety (mostly) and now have lots of friends =D I think I can be proud of myself for that one
Thanks for this! It's really sweet ^^
4 notes - publié le 22 juin 2022
n°3
Your anon is off so now you’ll know that I think you’d be the patron saint of sci-if space ships and their eclectic travelers
Oops sorry how do I turn it back on? I'm so bad at inbox and ask stuff
But thank you! The day I get to observe the stars a little closer is the day I can die happy
4 notes - publié le 20 février 2022
n°2
Happy valentine’s day!
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Happy valentine's Day!!
🌊💦
Oh what's that? I think I saw something in the water!
🐟
It's a little fish! And look! It's holding something!
💐🐟
For you! Thank you for being my mutual and making my day a little brighter ^^ (this is a bit corny but I guess it's in the spirit)
4 notes - publié le 14 février 2022
Mon billet n°1 en 2022
Hey I usually don't post art on this account but... @pond-child-edd (;;;・_・)
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I made some fanart ^^
(I really need to make a side account for fandom stuff and fanart lol)
53 notes - publié le 15 juillet 2022
Obtenez votre année 2022 en revue sur Tumblr →
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johaerys-writes · 3 years
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Fic Writer’s Round Up: 2020
I was tagged by wonderful friendos @in-arlathan, @noire-pandora, @faerieavalon, @pinkfadespirit, @tevivinter, and @serial-chillr! Thank you so much, it was so interesting to see what you've been up to this year <3 
2020 was a ride from start to finish and I considered not doing this at first because frankly, I wasn't particularly happy with my output this year, but I decided to give it a go and I was pleasantly surprised! This year has had a lot of ups and downs for me and there were plenty of times when I had a hard time putting words on the page, while others I couldn't stop. I've written primarily for Dragon Age and The Song of Achilles, and a little bit of Castlevania. In the below breakdown I've included all the fics I’ve written solo, both my published stuff as well as those that I plan on publishing in the near future  (for my lengthier works, I’ve only included the chapters written in 2020):
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Aran belongs to @oftachancer!
I don't know if you noticed the ~50k words of deleted stuff, but that was an entire arc that I wrote for A World With You, but decided it wasn't good enough so I scrapped and rewrote it. Those long gaps between updates this year? Yeah. That was it. I normally don't include deleted scenes in my overall wordcount but I decided to add this out of spite because it was a lot of hard work and it may or may not have had me sobbing into my coffee once or twice. Anyway. MOVING ON.
I also co-wrote A LOT with my friendo @oftachancer this year! It all started with a Modern AU one-shot of Aran and Tristan as college roommates, which then derailed into an epic adventure of about 250,000 words (placeholder title: Never Let Me Go) as well as a prequel of about 180,000 words of the boys before they went to college, which is currently being published on AO3 (Playground Love). We also published a smutty one-shot for Kinktober (Tea and Corsets). I love those boys so much, and I’m excited to write more of them. I have also co-written a few scenes for the Band!AU @oftachancer and @midnightprelude have been working on, which has been so much fun and I look forward to writing more! So, total wordcount for co-written stuff is approximately 445,000 words,  not including a couple one-shots that we’ve written and posted on Tumblr and I’m too lazy to track down now, or others that haven’t been published yet but will soon!
New Things I Tried This Year: 
Co-writing two massive, novel length fics was definitely a first, I had a lot of fun world-building with @oftachancer​, and it gave me the opportunity to develop some of my OCs that had been lurking in my mind for a really long time. I also started writing for a new fandom, TSOA, and that has definitely been a highlight in my year. I grew up reading the Iliad and ancient greek myths, and to see them brought to life was very rewarding. It has also been a lot of fun finding ways to integrate ancient greek lore in my works, I really love it!
Fic I spent the most time on: A World With You, although Playground Love and Never Let Me Go are close seconds!   
Fic I spent the least time on: To Build A Home. I wrote it in only a couple sittings after finishing Season 3 of Castlevania because I had so many feels! Chapters 1 and 2 of High-Flying Birds were also written on my phone in less than an hour, because again I was overwhelmed with feels after finishing The Song of Achilles.  
Favourite things I wrote: I am really proud of everything I’ve written this year, especially since it was such a stressful year and writing gave me a much needed escape! But I'm going to choose a few highlights, purely based on the satisfaction they gave me while writing, and how often I've gone back to reread them (does anyone else do that?? Lol): Viper in Tall Grass, because I enjoyed the heck out of writing in the Witcher Universe. Chapter 2: Thorn, from High Flying Birds, which was one of those scenes that practically wrote themselves and I still like the way it turned out. Lastly, Chapter 28: The Prodigal Son and Chapter 29: In Water Waist Deep from AWWY. They were both really challenging to write but in the end they were worth it and I personally feel it’s some of my best writing yet. I always get emotional when I go back to reread them.  
Favourite Things I Read: I’ve read a lot of published fiction this year, but not near as much fanfiction as I would have liked! I mentioned some of the fics I’m currently reading and loving in this post, but I’m going to make a more detailed fic rec post soon, so keep an eye out for that! 
Writing Goals for next year: My primary goals for 2021 are to finish AWWY and High-Flying Birds so I can start working on some projects I’ve been wanting to post forever, but apart from that, I have no goals other than to have fun writing, and perhaps participate in more fic exchanges and challenges! 
This post is terribly long (I’m usually rather quiet unless someone asks me to talk about my fics, and then I can’t shut up lol), but I want to thank every single person that has liked, reblogged and commented on my work, you guys are the best and there’s nothing like a comment or a thoughtful tag to make me want to create more! 
I also want to give a special shoutout to @solas-disapproves, @in-arlathan, @midnightprelude, @tessa1972 and @oftachancer​ for being the lovely, inspiring people that they are, and for gifting me with wonderful fanart or fanfic this year that made me want to melt in a puddle, as well as to @tenmeooo-thefangirltrash​ for translating High Flying Birds to Vietnamese! (Check it out here) Thank you all so much, your friendship and support has meant the world to me ;w;
I’m sure that everyone has done this already, but I’m still going to tag @pikapeppa, @schoute​, @schattengerissen, @zuendwinkel​, @elveny​, @fandomn00blr​, @dafan7711​, @dalish-rogue​, @jeannedarcprice​, @nug-juggler​, @kittimau​ and @lavellanvibes​ for art or writing, because I always love seeing what you’ve been up to! If you’ve made it to the end of this humongous post, please consider yourself tagged, and tag me back so I can see your work too!
CHEERS, AND ON TO 2021!! <3
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(art commission by the lovely and talented @curious-menace)
It is a time where I would like to see what my followers think about various concepts I have in mind pertaining to alternate versions of one my fics. It may take some time to write out any alternate versions since I've been busy and stressed out so much lately, but I am very curious as to what others would find intriguing to read.
But first, some backstory so be patient. We'll get to the voting at the end of this post.
I've been having a lot of bad days lately, and my mood has plummeted to a major low. This includes my self-esteem, which has always been in the dumps but is now basically a dumpster fire.
However, I don't want to be entirely cruel to myself. I deserve some sort of happiness, some sort of reprieve, and writing can be a good coping mechanism. I put a lot of my own thoughts, emotions, struggles, opinions, etc. into my works, as they serve as a way for me to get things off my chest. Sometimes, it's just cute and funny stuff, other times angsty but eventually fluffy stuff, and other times it's quite depressing and dark.
One fic, in particular, stands out, and that is the Mortal Kombat/Batman Arkhamverse crossover, "Volunteer," (trigger warnings: mentions psychological torture and suicide...more about this fic in a bit for those who would rather not read it because of those triggers) which features Arkham Knight Edward Nigma and Jonathan Crane, as well as a lady friend for Edward named Sara. It also features Erron Black and Cassie Cage from Mortal Kombat (Cassie is only mentioned in the story a few times).
If you read the blog intro/self-introduction post pinned at the top of my Tumblr, you know very well how I feel about Cassie Cage (particularly in MK11) and the Erron Black x Cassie Cage (BlackCage) pairing. Those negative feelings are mostly due to a very bad experience with a pushy BlackCage fan who just wouldn't relent one bit on their stance and it was emotionally and mentally draining to try and talk to them, including providing counter-arguments.
I've come up with alternate versions for "Volunteer" recently due to the spike in stress, depression, anxiety, and insecurities I've been dealing with as of late. This is where my followers come in!
I would like people to vote on which alternate take on "Volunteer" they would be interested in reading. Now, I can't guarantee when I'd get to it because, as I mentioned already, I've got a lot going on. However, I really want to try and write at least one alternate version of that fic, just to get some insecurities and negative thoughts off my chest.
Now, for those who are wary of reading "Volunteer" because of the trigger warnings, here's my advice: Just read the first chapter, if you want to. Chapter 2 deals directly with the sensitive subject matter, although, you can probably guess what happens anyway just by reading Chapter 1 and if you know anything about Jonathan Crane/Scarecrow...well, he likes to mess with people...mentally. To put it very mildly.
Now it's time for the voting. I have three different scenarios I've come up with that are variations/alternate versions of the current "Volunteer" fic's concept/storyline. I'd like followers to select 1 (one) alternate telling of the fic. I will open anonymous asks again, so if you are shy or just want your vote to remain a secret for some other reason, then that's fine by me. Otherwise, you can reply to this post with your choice.
Edit: if you are turned off by the idea of a Mortal Kombat/Batman Arkhamverse crossover, I get it. I don't read crossover fics myself, and that's usually because the crossovers either make no sense or do make sense but the ideas are poorly executed.
This crossover I'm talking about, though, isn't a full-on crossover of MK and Batman. There's no world-building, no larger plot, and no other characters in MK even appear or are mentioned except Erron Black and Cassie Cage.
If anything, it's more of a Batman Arkhamverse standard AU with Riddler and a female oc, and Erron and Cassie are the only concrete elements of MK brought in. I mean, yes, the other MK characters exist, I guess, but they have no purpose in this crossover I've written, and won't make any appearances.
So, if you had any concerns about the crossover aspect, I hope this clears things up
Choices below the cut!
A) "Don't You Wish"
This version is inspired by a song from Pink, called, "There You Go." In this alternate telling, Erron manages to survive Scarecrow's fear toxin, and escape (most likely because Erron is out of his mind and panicking, thus not a threat, and he has no one to help him, so Scarecrow doesn't give a damn what happens to the dude). The first thing Erron does is go to Sara's place, having already broken up with Cassie after realizing dating her was a mistake, and Sara means more to him than he thought.
Well, it's been several months since Sara basically pushed Erron out of her life for his poor choice in women, and (Arkham Knight) Edward Nigma has proven to be a much better (and, wiser and more sensible -- yes, I know, but he's not a skirt chaser, Guys) friend to Sara. While Erron ran off with a blonde selfie princess, Edward offered genuine comfort and companionship, and now Sara has been in the process of moving on from Erron even further.
Sara humors Erron and lets him tell her -- while sounding terrified, confused, and conflicted beyond belief thanks to the fear toxin -- what happened to him. Now, Sara doesn't know Edward asked Scarecrow to take care of Erron as a means of getting revenge for her. Doesn't matter anyway. She's unsympathetic towards Erron's plight, feeling as if he didn't even give her a chance to confess her feelings towards him, nor did he even seem to notice how she felt; it was like he was too busy with thinking with his privates to realize he had someone in front of him who would have treated him better.
Sara tells Erron -- in a flat, disinterested tone -- that his situation is tragic and all but wtf is she supposed to do? Why not go to his dumb blonde gf? Oh, they broke up? Well, how predictable. And Crane is also a (sort of) friend to Sara, which shocks Erron and leaves him feeling worse than before.
Sara sends Erron on his way, and he wanders off in a daze, unsure of what to do with his life now.
Sara and Edward meet the next day, and they have a pleasant time, obviously moving towards becoming a couple. She chooses not to mention Erron as she is completely severing the cowboy from her life.
B) "I Don't Even Miss You"
This alternate telling is similar to the previous one, but this time it's inspired by a Miley Cyrus song, "WTF Do I Know" (Hey, her Plastic Hearts album is actually fantastic!), and Edward is with Sara when Erron arrives at her place in a distressed state. At first, Sara deals with Erron in the hall of her apartment building, unsympathetic to his plight and basically telling him, "I told you so," and "too bad." Erron is getting more and more upset, even angry at Sara's callous tone, and starts to raise his voice, demanding to know why she is being so cold at a time like this?
Edward overhears Erron raising his voice to Sara, giving her a difficult time, and he gets pissed. Edward steps out into the hall and not only mocks Erron in various ways, but demands that he leave immediately, or what Scarecrow did will seem like a trip to Disney Land. Erron has caused Sara -- who is currently moving on and growing closer to Edward -- enough problems and heartache.
Edward reveals he set up Erron, and while Sara is stunned to find this out, she handles it better than expected. Edward said it was his way of getting revenge for her, and he'd do it again if need be. Erron is sent away feeling so much worse, feeling lost, hopeless, and betrayed.
Sara and Edward talk and she admits she's upset that he did something like this without speaking about it to her first. However, he explains that he genuinely did it for her and he doesn't want her to feel pain at the hands of some "idiotic cowman," who doesn't consider the feelings of others and who behaves like a greedy, violent Neanderthal. (And yes, Edward does care for Sara, and he didn't send Scarecrow after Erron out of jealousy -- maybe a little jealousy but it was mostly rage over Erron causing Sara so much emotional pain)
Sara means more to Edward than he can express, and he may not be the best when it comes to emotions, but he does care about her and wants her to be safe.
Sara forgives Edward, understanding that, through his heartfelt but very nervous and shy confession that he is sincere about his feelings for her, and they make amends. She of course tells him to never do something so extreme without consulting her first, though, because what happened to Erron -- while she doesn't care what happens to him in the slightest -- was a bit too much.
C) "Listen When the Devil's Calling"
Another title inspired by a Miley Cyrus song, "Night Crawling," and this alternate telling involves Telltale Riddler and no Scarecrow. Almost a year has passed since Erron went with Cassie and Sara, out of bitterness and heartache, refused to speak or see him. This didn't sit well with him as she was his only friend, and his relationship with Cassie dies within a few months.
He goes looking for Sara, realizing she has moved out of her apartment. It doesn't take him long to find out where she is, and she's with The Riddler, a notorious criminal genius and one of Gotham's elite villains. Erron is worried for Sara and seeks her out.
Turns out, Sara's just fine. This isn't one of those scenarios where the girl is with a guy who just using her and taking advantage of her vulnerability. No, Edward does actually love her and takes good care of her. He finds people like reckless, selfish, and ignorant people like Erron to be a disgrace but also amusing because of how pathetically primitive they are.
Edward also doesn't appreciate how Erron pushed aside a good thing in Sara to pursue a girl who is a social media brat and has more selfies on her phone than brain cells in her, well, brain. It defies all logic to Edward, but he's also not surprised because of how much of a disappointment Erron is as a human being (hey, this is Riddler we're talking about, and he's not one to be sweet and gentle to those he can't stand). Edward doesn't say these things out loud, though, as it's a bit too vulnerable and personal for him to do such a thing with someone he doesn't know or trust.
Sara is upset that Erron has resurfaced and she remembers how heartbroken she was when he went after Cassie Cage. She wants Erron to leave her alone like she asked, so she can move on. She can't trust him anymore, because he's just a skirt chaser in her eyes.
Erron tries to plead his case, tries to apologize to Sara, and expresses how he really feels, but this just distresses her further. Edward steps in and tells Erron he's done enough to Sara, she clearly doesn't want to see him, and he needs to take his leave.
This isn't a request.
Edward pulls Erron aside, telling the cowboy that the only reason he's going to walk away from this alive is that Sara hasn't asked for him to be killed. Should she tell Edward to take care of Erron, well, you all know what Telltale Riddler is like.
And those are the three variations on "Volunteer."
If you could be so kind as to:
leave a comment with your choice or
send an ask (even an anon ask) with your choice or
suggest your take on this story.
I'd appreciate it immensely!
Thank you all so much for supporting me and my writing and being patient with my sluggish publishing schedule!
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hoes4hoseok · 3 years
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what was your first impression of your moots?
no one has ever sent me something anonymously wow thanks 👁️👄👁️ (also this gets off-topic and turns into a love distribution fest later so...)
if I'm being honest, i had already started a mf thanksgiving post but scrapped it bc I thought I could combine these two. I started writing this MID-NOVEMBER.
disclaimer: i didn't do every single one of my moots, bit I've been writing this for over a month so cut me some slack.
ALSO I have a ton of typos and switch between 1st and 2nd person multiple times so please excuse the terrible writing😭
&& before I begin, I'd like to thank everyone who was patient and caring while I was gone. it means a lot. I love you all, and happy holidays (and new year at this point💀) to everyone who celebrates!
okay! here we go:
@hanniiesuckle17 -> okay so I started by low-key binging her stray kids works and then was like '🤩 I have to comment, this is too good'. so I did, and she was like...the sweetest? fr I was so happy because I had never interacted here and was super awk. I truly appreciate how kind she was to me when I was still new to tumblr; it made me confident enough to interact with people more and I can't thank her enough for it 🥺💘
@hyukaite -> kat! AHHH I remember following you bc I saw one of your blue hour concept photo (?) edits and was like "🤩 I want more". and then you asked if anyone wanted to play among us a couple of days later and I said HELL YES and joined && it was prob my best decision of october lmao <3 I remember thinking that you prob didn't wanna talk to me though so 🙈. thank you for being so fun and always making me laugh w your clapped instagram reels! you're active so often and I love talking to you about the most random shit (even when we were faking 99% of what we were saying DNFJFKFKFK resin)
@unlocktxt -> I'mma start w how much I admire you bc...well, I REALLY DO—you're so carefree (when appropriate ʕ´•ᴥ•`ʔ) and on the first day we made au moas I remember feeling 1000% more comfortable after listening and watching you jam out to everlasting shine hehe. (I also rlly appreciate (and admire) that you're always the quickest to realize when someone feels uncomfortable and checking in when you can🥺)
@strykiss -> our friendship had a very ✨unique✨ start but hERE WE ARE. I literally just thought you were young. like. you radiated pure positive ((& baby)) vibes. OKAY in all seriousness, you bring positive energy w you wherever you go and I love that for you ( ◜‿◝ )♡. it makes me so happy when you start saying what ever amie-talk there is for the day, even when I'm just reading your conversations in our group. again, you're a constant energizer whether you're trying to playing some new game w kat and lexi or if you're just talking like you usually do. this felt super repetitive but I hope it gets the point across—ly amie!
@missskzbiased -> my mbti pal! I was surprised that someone actually wanted to talk to me DNFIFJFJ but I'm soooo glad we did. thank you for tagging me in tag games (&& not getting annoyed when I tag you in everything dncjfjcj) and being one of my first friends here🥰you're super sweet and I love interacting w you a lot🥺
@kkuming -> GIGI—well, there were a few things that I remember thinking upon meeting you, one of them being that you and kat were deadass soulmates😌like no joke you two got along so well so....anyways, you were also very sweet but I felt like your "I don't swear thing" was an act at the time LMAO
@yawnjunie -> blu! the mastermind who sensed my seokmin energy (still got no idea how you did it but 🧠). okay when we first started talking i thought you were hella smart for your age—at least, that's what I got from that first stats exchange lmao (you weren't very active back then either🗿 [december piper is cringing bc she's much worse] but ily anyways:D💕)
@softbbyg0rl -> YOU WERE ALWAYS SO SWEET (♡ω♡ ) ~♪ LIKE IDK I JUST REALLY LIKED YOU. you also had sick makeup and art skills and I always have thought that you're really pretty<3 also, I'm glad we started talking again recently and I hope we continue💘
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rixxy8173571m3w1p3 · 5 years
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Out Of The Woods (3/?)
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This multi chap fic has been one that I've wanted to write for a while. I'm hoping to connect a few loose ends, since my series is getting closer to the end. Don't worry, I still got a couple of fics left in me. I'd love to thank @xerxezra whose conversations with me are always inspirational. I'd also like to thank @dorkydisappointment whose writing got my creative juice flowing and @hoodoo12 who continues to inspire me all the time. Please check out the wonderful art done by @ravenousscorpian for two scenes out of the second chapter of this fic (Her art found here)
References to the woman in Ricks journal is from my fic What You Found Amongst The Pages. I know, that was shameless self promotion. There are a lot of questions that I wanted to answer in you'd chapter, but for the sake of editing had to put it in the next. I'll work on it right as soon as this is posted. Thanks for everyone's continued support. 😘😘😘😘😘😘
If you haven't read part 1 or part2, then heres a link (Read Chapter 1, Chapter 2)
In this fic the reader tries to uncover the mystery of the artist behind Zeta-7s portrait.
___________________________
Chapter 3: Dare Not Say That Man Forgets Sooner
Whatever redeeming qualities the room held in the previous happy hours were gone, and now even the remnant, lingering daydreams were falling away. With every hour you comprehended the severity of your assumptions and what the consequences were if you decided that enough was enough. Honestly, you didn't want to lose him because Zeta-7 was the light of your life; he expanded your universe and had helped you become a better person, but you could still carry on if you needed to. You had the means, your work, and an ever growing list of books to read, but was it enough, now that you had gotten a taste of the good life? Probably not.
Nothing made sense anymore.
Concerning the current situation, and all which led up to it; if you considered everything which included your existence, life till now, and all he had ever done, then there was no mistaking that he loved you; or had; at least thought he did, but it didn't change the truth of the matter; you hadn't been the first. A few hours had given you time to weep until you thought you had no tears left to cry, but there was still a thick fog over your thoughts and rationality; any shift of emotion being too much to bear. You curled into yourself, aching, hoping you'd disappear, but it didn't work; you were still here; stuck. Being at a disadvantage, not knowing how to get home and neither having a way to get there if you could was frustrating.
Who knows how long you'd been down here, despairing, wallowing in memories and dust, but you were tired, thirsty, and knew that if you didn't move he'd have trouble finding you, and yet you didn't care; let him find you; let him work for it. Though, how would that make it any better? All it would do is succeed in upsetting him before you knew all the facts. You hated this. Father always said hate was a strong word that shouldn't be taken for granted; you rarely had reason to feel as such, but the more you gleaned from those photos and the more proof you found of her presence about the place made you feel hateful and bitter.
Thinking of her smiling at him, receiving every bit of his loving-kindness and inviting demeanor animated by unaffected good-will; his general countenance and becoming familiar with a fresher-faced creature of your dreams; holding him; touching him; loving him. Oh God no, you thought, groaning into a handmade pillow. What was worse was that you couldn't dissuade the thought of her mysterious silhouette sneaking up behind you, plunging a knife into your already fragile identity, and taking back what was hers. Your doubt feeding these ugly horrors which were hybrids of nightmares and daydreams.
Though during a brief moment of clarity, you had come to a conclusion which hardly alleviated these feelings, but we're true; it wasn't your fault. Yes, it had been your choice to accept him and be in a proper relationship with someone with an ambiguous past, and yes you did snoop around a little, but you didn't know how much he'd been hiding or searching for someone like her and had settled on silly, stupid you. Yet, no matter how much you thought about it, why chase a vision of the past and put so much effort in the present? There must've been more to this; there had to be.
Manifested, unstinted kindness and consideration and love in his form didn't happen out of the blue, it was nurtured and conditioned. Had it been her influence which made you knew? Who knows, but you had been fortunate to have had an opportunity to associate let alone form a romantic attachment, but that would soon pass away once you confronted him. Right? After a little while longer, when your heart was finally beginning to slow and thought you'd be able to catch your breath, you heard him walking about upstairs; calling and knocking.
Rick was home and you turned over on the couch and covered your ears so you wouldn't hear him; you weren't ready to deal with this; you didn't want to deal with this. In your heart of hearts, you wanted to go home, to the past, back to when there were no problems and it was just you, dad, and your dreams. If only he was still around so that he could tell you that everything was alright and it was all just a bad dream and that he could fix it, but you couldn't; only in a dream, you could. Dad always knew what was best, but you were old enough to decide for yourself now.
Did this mean you wish you never knew Rick? No, but you wished that you would've never known about all this; about her; that you could've lived in ignorance. Oh, the sweet, sweet bliss of ignorance, how wonderful it had been while it lasted. Even when his warm laughter echoed down the stairway, having found you, ready, eager and excitable to be near you, you didn't answer. You knew you weren't in the state of mind to say anything nice, that despite it all he wasn't a bad person. Yet, the moment that hand of his touched your shoulder, you hissed. “Don't touch me.”
He gasped, stunned by this uncharacteristic aggression. Maybe you weren't the nice girl he thought you were after all; especially if the rustling of his clothes alone made you angry enough to dig your nails into the couch cushions. Zeta-7 waited for a few moments, ruminating on what would be the best course of action before he knelt down to be at your level and wondered. “What's wrong? Are y-y-you hurt? Is th-there anything I can do?”
Swallowing back a sob, you silently counted to ten then answered in a listless tone. “I don't know if you can. You've… you've been hiding stuff from me.”
“Huh, I-I have? What have I…”
“Don't try to deny it.”
Pushing yourself up, you rubbed your swollen eyes and chanced a look at him; your sight fuzzy as tears threatened to fall but thankfully didn't. The alarm in his widened eyes at the state of your runny nose, and tear-stained cheeks made him instinctively reach out to wipe your tears away, but you pushed that familiar, loving hand away. “M-mi corazón?”
Instead of answering as you usually would, you pulled out the well-loved copy of Persuasion from behind a pillow, took a deep breath and dropped it on his lap. “I found it while I was looking for something to read.”
“Oh geez.”
“And can you believe I found more than I bargained for.”
You two sat in silence for what felt like hours as he stared at it, and when he gathered the courage to look inside, the lines about his brow and mouth deepened; another sign that it was true. When he finally interrupted the silence, he confessed regretfully. “I-I was going to tell you.”
“But you didn't. There's a lot of things that I understand are none of my business, but this….I think is a good time to know. If you care about me at all, then read what you wrote.”
“But it's - it's not what you think.”
“Then there's nothing be afraid of. Go on then, read it.”
Visibly swallowing, his shaky hands held it open and he stuttered. “I-I-I thought of you today as I left th-the milky way, on my way t-to a classified location. I-I wish you were here so I could show you the beauty that exists across the universe, but knowing our limitations I can only send you this wonderful novel that I found when I was exploring a-a bookstore located on one of Saturn's moons. I-I know it can be hard to believe that Miss Jane Austen's works can reach the furthest depths of-of space, but that can be blamed on a certain Gallifreyan and his little blue box. I can't wait to hear what y-y-you think of it. Till next time my dear. With love, from Rick.”
“Don't forget the photos.”
Setting down the book, he glanced at the discarded photos, sagging a little after each one, gauging your reaction after he finished studying them. Rick was a smart man, he knew well enough that he messed up and how compromising those photos were. “It's not - I was only writing as ugh - as a friend.” He began, wringing his hands as he went on. “Y-y-y-y-you know I don't have that many.”
Which was true. “Really? So what did she do for you? Was she special?”
“She - she made me a little less lonely. That in itself was something I w-was grateful for.”
Your nails bit into your palms and that ever familiar ache bloomed across your chest; his answer birthing more questions than you were willing to ask. He offered you a Werther's original to placate you which you accepted; it's wrapper similar to the one in the painting. As ever he waited for you to answer, and the longer he waited, the more he sagged; his eyes pleading, hoping, wishing that he could know whatever hurt clouded your heart and wanted to fix it. “I want to believe you, I really do,” you admitted, which made him hopeful, though only for you to crush it with this. “but I'm tired of walking on eggshells. Tell me, what did you want from me when you had someone like her? Seems as though she was a good match for you. She was a creative who could paint, loved flowers, and butterflies among other things I imagine.”
“Sh-she did.”
You bit the inside of your cheek in an attempt to hold back the surge of feelings which were a result of his sincerity. Damn it. You could do this……possibly. “See?” you said cooly, focusing your gaze on your naked feet. “I knew she was special considering you sent her a book that had belonged to the Doctor. She also knew about your travels, which meant you trusted her and you hardly trust anyone. The point I'm getting at is that I want to know what I am to you. So, am I a knockoff or a rebound? Because we both know there's nothing like the real thing.”
“N-n-no, not at all. You mean th-the world to me and I-I love you. I have only loved you. ”
“But she loved you, didn't she? And you loved her. I can't ignore that. If she's anything like me, then what are we doing together Ricardo? Why aren't you with her? I…. I thought we understood each other but then I found proof that I was only second best. I can't do it, I can't compete with a shadow, and I'm not going to try. I don't have it in me.”
“I-I-I-I never expected you to. Por favor mi amor de m-mi vida, if you'll let me explain, I'll tell you whatever you want. I - I don't want to lose you. Please, honest t-t-to God, I don't. I can't.”
“Hmm, I didn't know you were a praying man.”
“When you're about t-t-to lose your universe, I don't think there are th-that many options. I can't - oh please I can't lose you. Not again.”
You felt your resolve breaking. You wanted to fall into his arms and melt into the comfort of them; for you both to comfort each other and let it all go because it probably was just a big misunderstanding; him being the best thing that ever happened to you, but not yet. Maybe he was a praying man after all, and if God was merciful, then why wouldn't you be? Rick certainly would. For Zeta-7, you could be. He'd definitely given you enough chances.
“Fine.” you decided, helping him up as you stood, but through this brief touch he almost misunderstood, thinking that the worst was over and gave your hand a squeeze; his warm smile weakening your resolve even further. Maybe Ricks were masters at mind games after all. And you knew it wouldn't take much for him to make you forget how unhappy you were, and like magic, show you something wonderful and dazzling, but you didn't want to be charmed; you wanted the truth. You bit the flesh inside of your cheeks hard enough for you to bleed, and despite relishing the warmth which permeated your chilled hands, you let go. “I'm……I'm not over it yet.”
TBC
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