#i dont know dont ask

[vampirefangs]

most excellent. now i shall proceed to imbibe this iced coffee beverage and indulge in a tobacco cigarette whilst the sweet sounds of nine inch nails grace my ears.

#i dont know dont ask #this is just the thought i had while getting my coffee #it speaks #smoking mention

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail'' #ah tumblr... #writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" ..... #no.... not really..... #idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing... #this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey. #idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me. #i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

[catmask]

sometimes while i think about that while a lot of adults did not treat me very well as a kid i also get a lot of 'in hindsight this person was so good to me and i didnt even realize it until now' as an adult. today i was thinking about how the first anime convention i ever went to was when i was 10 and i asked the man working the manga cafe what manga was/what a good place to start was (because the con was very overstimulating for me and i had gotten lost) and he asked how old i was before recommending yotsuba and asking if i wanted any water or something to eat. its really simple but theres a lot of bad things that couldve happened or he could've been careless in his recommendation, but instead yotsuba has remained one of my favorite manga for years, and probably a large portion of why i continue to read manga as an adult... i think adults who try to involve kids in the world safely/kindly even in little ways make so much more of a difference than they ever really know.

#and i know that sounds silly like YES. it was just a bookr ecommendation #but i feel like a lot of people either dont really care about whats a good starting point for younger kids in their shared fan spaces #or dont really take the care to recognize different peoples ages would effect what they would both enjoy or #be capable of engaging with #not to mention theres a lot of manga that would NOT have been appropriate for a 10 year old to read #so the fact that he askedd and even asked what sort of thing i liked at the time #was very sweet. i think about him a lot and i hope hes doing well #txt #scratchpost

[texasinnersmile]

#i dont know dont ask

[nakathemoth]

Constantine honest to god thought a child had just been struck by lightning and died by his side

#I WANTED TO DRAW MY TOP THREE DC BOYS INTERACTING SOMEHOW #dont ask me why bruce is standing in the rain waiting for the bus. Something happened. Jason took the batmobile I dont know #anyways neither of them remembered to bring an umbrella. billy to the rescue #DC #my art #shazam #billy batson #batman #bruce wayne #constantine #john constantine #fanart

[nachomori-3]

I couldn't resist. More Ear, the hypothetical child of @canisalbus 's oc's Machete and Vasco. Sopping wet thing <3

#digital art #notchoart #gift art #vaschete #ibispaintx #kinda had to improvise the nightgown i dont know anything about 16th century italian fashion </3 #vasco #machete #not my oc #ship child #ship kid #ask to tag #doodles

[caruliaa]

staff still hasn't given me polls, what should i do?

🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪 their moms 69%

🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪🟪 their dads 31%

grace image os i get to look at her

#edit: edited the og post to what i want but to set the record straight i edited to the post to be mathematically correct right after the #first person pointed it out which was like ten mins after i posted the og post. now fuck offf !!!!! the rest of the tags r from the og post #for some reason i feel very immature making your mom jokes about tumblr staff. which i shldnt !! #bc they suck nd they still havent given me polls. but i ig i feel imature bc it a your mom joke 😭 but still i tihnk its kinda funny #EDIT: edited the post to what i want bc yall were getting annoying . but to set the record straight i edited to post to be mathematically #also its *mum* not mom okay i am NOT !! an american . but if i say mum everyone will j be like 'omg british' like i dont know i am #anyway. i want polls please. give me the rigght to force my mutuals chose between the most inane things #also i tihnk it wld b cool for the cs weekly blog. like w each episode #i cld do a poll of like. out of five stars what do u think of this ep #and it wld b a cool thing of which eps r ppls faves #also i cld have like. whose ur fave in team red whos ur fave in acme etc #id prob just have to go with vile faculty bc theres more than 10 ppl in vile. and ppl wld kill me if i didnt include nel the ell or whoever #it wld b fun !!! #oh btw csweekly thats i thing i want to start. prob on uhhh the 11th of feb ill post abt it more but its basically #a tag/blog for watching cs one ep a time watching one ep every saturday #ya !! :3 #flappy rambles #inaccessible #ask to tag #(<- idk. just in case)

[hevcrap]

Got high thought about power drills made a image. You know how it is. Happy new year Love you.

#☢️ #DO NOT ask me to crop it I DONT KNOW HOW.

[bobacupcake]

begging... pleading... for a bigger version of that pikachu gif (if possible), i am so utterly enchanted with it its unreal (i have that exact plush in my house!!!)

#hope this is what u mean #he's carmelas :) though im pretty sure i also had the exact same one ?! #also if anyone wants him transparent im sorry but my transparency machine broke and i dont know why #ask #potion of answers your question #Anonymous

[comradekatara]

it's national draw your sibling day

#id in alt text #avatar the last airbender #atla #katara #sokka #katara&sokka #art #mart #oldergaang #i like to think they get less antagonistic once theyre in their twenties #i also firmly believe w every fibre of my soul that sokka improves his art #(and im coming for anyone who says otherwise in the comments of this post with hammers. jsyk) #also drawing w charcoal is way easier than ink painting. so maybe he realizes that too #also apologies if i butchered the spelling of katara's name i was just working w the wiki but . if its bad u can say its intentional #bc sokka is stupid or whatever idk 😭 #anyway. this ACTUALLY started bc i was thinking about how we never actually see katara draw #but i just KNOW that she would have the most anime art style #dont ask me how i know these things ok i just do #so this whole thing was just an excuse to showcase that . lmao #i worked so hard on this tho. pls clap

[zillychu]

assorted brainrot from like 2 months ago

#danny phantom #everlasting trio #owari no seraph au #yes i know SHUT UP #do not ask me for specifics i dont even know #more things kei is responsible for enabling #zilly art #posting this at 2am hoping no one notices

[tectco]

I was thinking about Husk's love for magic tricks and was like haha magician husk! and i remembered there's magician assistants and i mean,,,Angel's right there sooooo

i whipped up magician and assistant huskerdust

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin hotel angel dust #huskerdust #angelhusk #hazbin hotel fanart #hazbin hotel art #Someone else mustve done this before #if i ever draw these designs again i might change them up #the idea struck me and killed me off #DUDE THIS WAS MILDY BASED OFF THAT LIKE #I DONT KNOW IF IT WAS A TWEET OR TUMBLR POST BUT I CANT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD FIND IT #BUT IT WAS LIKE HUSK DOES MAGIC TRICKS AND ANGEL ENCOURAGES HIM OR SOMETHNG AND THAT ALSO INSPIRED THIS #MAN I DID NOT WANT TO SHADE THIS #DONT EVEN ASK ME ABOUT RENDERING #tecoart

[lno-x]

why they dress like that

#ninth house is fucking dark souls cosplayers or smth #dont ask me why coronabeth wears howl's jacket i dont know #tlt #the locked tomb #coronabeth tridentarius #ianthe tridentarius #palamedes sextus #camilla hect #lno-x art

[nouverx]

Posting those wips in case I never finish them ~

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanart #hazbin alastor #hazbin rosie #alastor #radiorose #qpr radiorose #sketch #digital art #autodesk sketchbook #I havent drawn radiorose in a long time damn that feels good #I love them probably as much as they love each other #will I ever get tired of drawing them singing and dancing? who knows #also seriously please stop dming me to ask me if it's platonic radiorose or not I legit dont care #art is supposed to be experienced if it's romantic for you then its romantic if its not then its not

[umblrspectrum]

being grounded from devices means nothing when you have a robot boyfriend

#i think im getting better with different angles #its obviously not perfect but this is like 1 of 3 times i've ever drawn a character at this angle #n was unreasonably hard to get right here but uhmm i figured it out hopefully #she IS winning. gamer pro #real talk. n would be cracked at fps games. he's been living like one for at least a couple years #he also sits in the tism way. it just feels right i think #dont ask how uzi's playing on that controller she doesnt know either #art #murder drones #murder drones uzi #murder drones n #serial designation n

[meanbossart]

Drow begging Astarion to piss on him and Astarion going through 5 different emotions in under 10s would be pretty funny to witness. How would Astarion react to it?

Well that's awkward

#ask #art #du drow #astarion #bg3 #gross #I dont know how else I could possibly content warn for this