Tumgik
#i dont want to be recovering rn. i want to be in it because i want to be losing the weight and i want to feel the hunger
thereisnofood · 1 year
Text
it is insane to me the amount of trans people that barely know anything more than surface level info about SRS. like i see transmascs criticize meta and phallo and complaining about how theyre ""the only two options "" while not actually knowing about how many techniques and variations there are, for each of those surgeries, depending on an individuals wants/needs. someone on twitter was describing their ideal surgery as if it didnt exist, like they straight up described extended metoidioplasty to a tee and they have no fucking idea that thats a thing you can do. like bro spend any time at all reading posts from post-op trans people and surgeons im begging you
19 notes · View notes
milkweedman · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Second round of seedlings so far ! I have no idea what any of the flowers coming up are (ran out of labels a few years ago and now i just like to guess until it's big enough to be obvious lol) but the beets (red shoots with green leaves) and spinach (no closeups but its the ones that look like little grass) are doing well, as is the singular melon that actually germinated. Not sure what happened there, maybe i planted the rest too deep. The sage, basil, amd parsley are all from the first round of seedlings and just growing slowly and steadily. Should probably thin them, i guess...
Also, the lavendar outside is doing that molting thing again which i love, and the Old Stump in the front yard is looking particularly nice today.
#gardening#im very nervous at the moment because i just sent a message to my surgeon asking for more pain meds#bc of how awful the last week has been#and im nervous that 1) she'll say no bc i rly dont know how i will get thru another week or so of that pain#but also 2) what if she labels it drug seeking behavior and it goes on my chart or something ??#like the thing is that it IS drug seeking behavior bc i want drugs so that i am in less pain#specifically do want drugs for pain control. and will want them in the future too ...#idk. yeah. nervous. also still in a lot of pain but took my very last two oxys a few minutes ago bc#if i am going to be this nervous it seems cruel to make myself also experience the fact that my right hip is dislocated again#which it is. and has been for a few days now.#chronic illness#hospital#i mean technically we are talking about surgery pain here but its not like all the chronic pain disappears for surgery#it doesnt take a nice little vacation#its still there its just that now youre trying to recover while every few hours someone dislocates a joint for fun#which doesnt help very much with recovery#anyway ! it is a nice day outside rn but im not sure if i should trust that it will stay that way for long#but i would love to spin...#considered yesterday that i could just put the alpaca on the backburner until the weather is actually good enough#to spin outside for 5-6 hours at a time so i can just get it done#and mix some fun scrap batts to spin in the meantime#but i had a box full of packing peanuts from the dulcimer that my moms girlfriend sent#which was sitting right underneath all my scrap yarn in my crafting area in my room#and then all of my scrap yarn fell into it. and i have not cleaned it up yet for reasons unknown to me#will try to do it today ? the oxy has kicked in (have to take double the dose for it to do anything so the latest refill was 2.5 doses)#and i am in Minimal Pain and feeling...dare i say .... functional ?#drugs
13 notes · View notes
reachedgoals · 5 days
Text
I don't necessarily regret telling a coworker I'm ana but I really wish he would mind his business sometimes
1 note · View note
wosemi-sama · 16 days
Text
and the crowd went mild 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 also no chara dividers im lazy rn
these r so short id add more but im rushing rn sorry lmfao 😭😭😭
intended lowercase!
misc. obm hcs
Tumblr media Tumblr media
LUCIFER
wakes up at the ass crack of dawn every single morning.
wears those old man pjs. with the long hat and fuzzy slippers and gown. you know the one.
most bitter coffee you've ever had in your life how he can drink it is astonishing.
his bed, his mattress, his pillows are all as hard as rock how does this man SLEEP.
sleeps like hes the corpse at the funeral hes that one image
MAMMON
will pull you into a headlock and call it a hug.
LEVIATHAN
guy who had mountain dew and cheeto dust in his veins instead of blood. guy who marinates in his room for two months straight. guy who- (i am immediately shot dead).
did a collab with the anti-lucifer league to create a 100k words dialuci fic to piss off lucifer (dont worry about him he got paid in anime and tsl merch).
TRULY believes he is the #1 tsl fan. and also #1 ruri fan.
wimp who VOLUNTARILY makes you cosplays if you are a cosplayer or even if you aren't. it will happen.
vtuber fan. he was like "hey i wanna be a streamer but i dont wanna show my face but i also want to be an anime boy! wait-" and now hes a vtuber.
has accidentally referred to all of his brothers as "chat" at least once. hes never recovering from that btw.
SATAN
cannot stop annotating books he reads for the life of him.
all of his books are just filled to the brim with sticky notes because all he does is annotate.
once he has a crush he will start imagining him and them in the same scenarios as the characters in romance novels he read. (loser alert!!)
sneaking a new cat into hol like once a week (he never succeeds btw).
ASMODEUS
oh boy his room REEKS of perfume and body spray.
"i sprayed my new perfume in every nook and cranny! smells so floral and elegant, don't you think?" (it smells like a bath and body works threw up.)
surprisingly plays the trumpet and BOY is he loud. bro is absolutely blasting those notes.
worst driver ever btw.
BEELZEBUB
freckles all over!! like a lot. *im not beating the insane allegations*
ate like 27 family size dorito bags, 30 dollars worth of taco bell, and four sprites in one sitting and he still hasnt recovered.
sleeps. like a lot. not as much as belphie but enough to be considered an eepy guy.
BELPHEGOR
will randomly grab every blanket and pillow he can get his hands on and make a nest in the common room if he's up to it. and then have everyone make a dog pile in it just so they can hang out and be silly.
will NOT clean it up afterwards. lucifer will tell him to and his only response will be "im tired..."
freckles like beel too i think theyre silly.
9829364 cow plushies. (theyre all from lucifer)
SOLOMON
will randomly gaslight people for no reason
"hey did you do the homework"
homework? what homework? there was homework? my, what even is homework? never heard of that.
"hey, i heard of this animal from the human world called a giraffe! can i see a picture?"
what? what's a giraffe? oh, those!! yeah, they're just myths. they're not real. purely fiction!!
yk that one post about tumblr funnyman solomon. he is a tumblr funnyman to me. he confidently posts his exploded spaghetti and gets 10k notes i think.
SIMEON
has a book club with satan and solomon. :)
probably writes oneshots of the brothers on tumblr idfk man (sorry to the simeon fans i write like nothing on this guy bro).
LUKE
bodily six ("but didnt the devs say hes ten?" shut up. /j)
along with that, also shorter than in canon. (since hes. yk. a first grader. that BOY is not five foot hes one sauce packet long dude.)
favorite store in the human world is walmart. i like to think his human world outfit is all exclusively from walmart bc thats funny i think.
DIAVOLO
hands of STEEL. he tries to grab your wrist and he nearly crushes it by accident.
ice cream!! he loves it :) his favorite is strawberry btw.
also this boy is NOT a himbo hes a smart man.
needs like a hug and some sleep and also a friend this boy works too much!!
BARBATOS
short. like really short. especially according to devildom standards since most demons are super tall.
"but isn't he six feet?" not in my heart.
somehow always making tea for some reason?? if he's not making tea then he's making pastries.
my boy does not SLEEP. hasn't slept since the sun has been birthed and doesn't plan on ever doing it.
Tumblr media
146 notes · View notes
v-arbellanaris · 1 year
Note
PLEASE share about the Cullen Cult Arc
sighs. this is my second time writing this post ;~; literally why does the autosave option exist if tumblr doesnt actually bother to autosave anything, i dont fucking get it.
this is going to be much briefer than the original post i wrote because im still REELING over how tumblr just ate the entire fucking post. its fucking gone. and idk if i have the energy or mental capacity rn to rewrite the whole thing. basically, this arc - which is the arc i developed for him in vee verse - is the arc i think cullen should've had in dai.
firstly, i'm not retconning anything he said or did in dao or da2. this is because those things serve a narrative purpose. cullen is a good templar - that's the entire crux of the problem. he exists in these two games as a narrative tool; he represents the views of the chantry. as such, anything you do with his character arc cannot be divorced from the reality of the mage/templar conflicts, and the glaring issues of the chantry and must, actually, address and involve those things, because cullen is a product of his surroundings. i'm not saying this to minimise or give him excuses for anything he's said or done, but that is made true for him by his very positioning in the narrative as being the chantry's voice. for most of my playthroughs, which lean pro-mage, cullen is an antagonistic force - he has to say and do horrific things, and it would be stupid for me to retcon the horrible things he did.
secondly, my main issue comes from his writing in dai - probably to no one's surprise. i am not unopposed to having a redemption arc for him in dai - this is villain-fucking the blog, sorry not sorry - but the problem is that he does not have one. to have a redemption arc, the following two things needs to happen:
the realisation/acknowledgement/knowledge/whatever that he caused harm to people with his actions/inactions
addressing the False Belief that he has embraced that has previously justified his harmful actions/inactions in order to accept the Truth (this is just basic character narrative construction).
and dai fails to do both of these because the writing team in inquisition is physically incapable of admitting the chantry is wrong and has done wrong and will continue to do wrong. they are physically incapable of looking at fucked up power dynamics and clear cases of oppression and not going "but what if the oppressed people. wanted to be oppressed. NEEDED to be oppressed, even."
which leaves his character arc - whether you want to consider it redemptive or not - confusing. he's trying to shake a lyrium addiction? sure, okay. but why is he addicted to lyrium? why is being addicted to regular ol' lyrium bad? it's not blue lyrium that killed meredith, it's not blue lyrium that corypheus and samson are using.
you get confusing things like cullen's entire character arc being centered around lyrium addiction... but no one seems to give a shit if the inquisitor takes lyrium and becomes a templar, except cullen. you get confusing things like cullen's entire character arc being centered around recovering from lyrium addiction and the templar route in dai and you get to the scene where all the templars get their lyrium draughts. the ceremony and chanting and celebration around getting the lyrium, when barris takes his draught, which is frankly revolting. but it highlights the inconsistency - lyrium, this scene tells us, is good. because the templars are good, and they use it for good. yet cullen's entire arc is about overcoming his lyrium addiction, but don't worry!!!! templars are still good and lyrium is still good. its fucking INCOHERENT!!!!!!
he is addicted to lyrium because that is how the chantry maintains absolute control over its templars. it is a mind-altering substance that causes paranoia, which the chantry specifically takes advantage of and feeds with their all mages are inherently dangerous rhetoric, which is a false rhetoric, as i've pointed out before. but instead of acknowledging any of that, dai's writing goes "lyrium is Bad because [mumble mumble] and its So Important that he doesn't take it so that [mumble mumble]".
because the story is physically incapable of uttering anything even vaguely critical of the chantry.
so, this covers my main issue with his writing in dai. i would ideally try to fix it - without retconning anything he did in dao or in da2. this is what the cullen cult recovery arc is referring to.
i'm not going to go into it in too much detail but the templar order - inclusive of the seekers - fits a lot of the parameters of a cult. specifically, the BITE model, but also this checklist, and a whole bunch of other parameters i found when researching into cults for this specific reason. (which. makes sense. seeing how the orlesian chantry is was also technically a religious cult that becomes the main religion of the lands by actively slaughtering all the other sects)
but what's particularly interesting about it specifically is that, in-world, no one else seems to think it's a cult. for all of cullen's views, he is not the extreme end in da2 - alrik is. meredith is. what's particularly disturbing to me about cullen's point of view is that because he's a product of his environment, because he's a narrative tool representing the chantry's views, cullen's opinions and actions are actually a normality test. people in thedas don't find cullen's views repulsive because most average joes in thedas agree with him. i think it's easy to forget cullen isn't the outlier in-universe - we are.
but, canonically speaking, this is what happens: cullen, like most good antagonists getting a redemption set up, misses his chance to Embrace Change at the end of da2. he sides with meredith too late for it to matter or make a difference - mages (who you learn on the templar route, he's not exactly eager to kill) who he's supposed to protect are already dead. but what happens in kirkwall shakes him to his core and he looks to leave the order entirely - a good step.
the problem is that he leaves the order to join the inquisition. the inquisition, which is headed by the left and right hands of the divine. the right hand of the divine is a seeker herself. the inquisition is spearheaded and justified by the divine, who he has been trained for most his adult life to be subservient to. the divine who formed the inquisition to replace the templar order and hired him to essentially train and recreate the order.
worse, still. no one thinks he did anything wrong. kinloch was not his fault, it was the fault of greagoir and the older templars who were simply not vigilant enough, meredith told him. how he acted to keep order in the circle and the city after the viscount was executed is admirable, cassandra tells him. he was only following orders, leliana admits grudgingly, he stood up for what was right when meredith went too far. no one thinks he did anything wrong, because he is a good templar. because all the atrocities he committed were not committed against people - they were committed against mages, who are not people, not like you and me.
cullen hops from one cult to the next. the inquisition is the exact same thing he's always done and known, just repackaged - quite literally, considering the inquisition's symbol. but canonically, he thinks it's something different. he wants it to be different.
it's not, though.
so, the thought process behind my thoughts for him boils down to this: how does he get the language to describe exactly why this is wrong? how does he get the language to describe why it matters, why it's important, that he hurt real people? how does he get past the Lie that he believes - that he has to be a good templar, to stop anything like kinloch from happening again, since kinloch happened because they weren't vigilant enough, because they were too sympathetic to mages?
his arc shouldn't have just been about overcoming lyrium addiction. his arc should have been a story about recovering from being part of a hate group, a story about recovering from part of a cult.
there's several ways to go about it, i think. and if you want to specifically know how i'm going to do it, you guys should encourage me to write vee verse 😌
371 notes · View notes
quitealotofsodapop · 3 months
Note
That's an interesting thought. What are the differences between demon monkeys, specifically stone monkeys, and their none demonic counterparts? Obviously, the parent does abandon the egg but they may tend to expect their troop to take a larger role in raising the child, especially if they aren't sure if they'd survive the egg making process if they didn't have a mate. Also, I wouldn't be surprised if they mated for life since you can definitely see it with Wukong and Macaque even when they hated each other. So perhaps, with a normal pregnancy, a stone monkey would expect the majority of the parenting to come from their partner, not for lack of care, but rather because even a normal pregnancy is somewhat risky for the species.
There's a reason there are so few nowadays, and their struggles with pregnancy is a big part of it.
They have strong paternal and maternal instincts, especially those born of the more feminine side of the elements. That's why Wukong could never bear to hurt something cute like a bunny robot and why things like puppy eyes are so effective on him. He's of the Earth Element. Even if he himself identifies as primarily male, he will still have heavy maternal instincts.
It also is why he knew from a very young age that he wanted to be a parent.
referencing this post on Stone Monkey and Monkey demon social dynamics vs irl monkeys.
Stone Monkeys live in wide social troops with no clear ranking system apart from "who can do X task rn?" since they originated in a less kindly world (pre Great Flood) and having healthy babies was super taxing biologically. Family ties very important - older kids will stay with parental troop their whole lives save for when they search for a mate (sometimes they dont even have to do that since inter-troop mingling is encouraged) or when they hear the call of adventure/ leave to explore for potiential new nesting grounds.
Stone Monkeys also typically mate for life.
Which is *why* Stone Eggs evolved in the first place.
Consider this;
Monkey A & B are a mated pair. B dies due to illness or attack or old age, and A is super sad and doesn't have any cubs to care for. A then decides to bury themselves with their deceased mate so that they can reunite in some way. Add in some sympathetic death/life god blessing the species and you got an Egg! Formed from the combined dao of the parents - it gives the A & B a last shot in the dark to continue their genetic lineage! The troop can care for the baby, cus clearly it's part of the family, and the cub will (hopefully) grow up to pair up and make cubs of their own.
BUT...
Say the whole troop was wiped out by something that left Monkey A the last survivor? Illness, massacre, a certain Great Flood, etc...
Thats where the "*Stone* Egg" comes in again. By developing and incubating slowly underground and adsorbing natural life energy, the baby can stay cooking for a long time until another troop comes across it. Stone Monkeys you see, love digging and can sense odd sources of energy hidden beneath the ground. A troop member digs up a weird egg-shaped object within or next to the fossil of another monkey? Not hard to put two and two together. Also helps potientially "wake up" the parent whos body has been in biological torpor for a long time. The stone egg parent may be able to recover from the process and help raise cubs in the new troop. The egg's parent *may* be able to move on from their former mate and/or find one in this troop, but its uncommon for widowed stone monkeys to "remarry".
In terms of parenting structure; Stone Monkeys prefer to have it equally split between the parents/mated pair with older kids and troop members pitching in. In the case of pregnancy/surviving a Stone egg, the birth parent is allowed some vacation time from the baby as the other parent picks up the slack. +This is inspired by irl Golden Lion Tamarins and Pygmy Marmosets, where the dad and troop all pitch in to help raise the babies while the mom recovers from the very taxing birth. Dad monkeys even train to gain muscle so that they can carry the babies for Mom when they arrive. They even midwife for their mate when they go into labor.
Tumblr media
And as for literally mating for life? Its the norm. Some Stone Monkeys simply never settle down or dont have a life mate at all. But the ones who do? It's almost supernatural levels of devoted.
Wukong and Macaque are unknowingly "soulmates" in the most literal sense of the word. Their Stone Monkey instincts tell them "this is the one" and to make it Work, because its the greatest chance for genetic success/survival in addition to genuinely being in love with one another.
So it was devastating for both when jealously, anger, and the interference of the gods caused the two to split so many times in their lives. Even when they "broke up" under the Mountain, they knew the other would be their only mate even without knowledge of Stone Monkey social structures. Which made it even worse due to a certain fight they had later on in the Journey...
As for maternal/parental instincts? Super duper high. Stone Monkeys again, pitch in to take care of the troops babies to give the parents a break. They also naturally adopt orphan cubs; makes more sense to adopt when pregnancy is so dangerous for the parent and there's a perfectly good baby without a parent right there! And those on the more "Yin"-side of the gender trigram tend to go full "mom-mode" on babies that aren't theirs, their bodies even reacting to an adopted baby as if it were born from them.
Which causes some issues regarding Stone Monkeys considering anything vaguely monkey-like without a parent to be potientally their new baby. Regular earth Monkey Demons probably have old forgotten nicknames for Stone Monkeys that roughly translate to "den mothers" or even "the nannies".
So SWK's reaction to the bunny mechs on the Moon? Typical Stone Monkey behavior.
Tumblr media
Even if MK aint Wukong's bio-kid, he certainly became part of his troop the moment he saw him.
62 notes · View notes
joohanisms · 6 months
Text
hiii i'm sick rn and i think i deserve some shameless selfish fanfiction
xdh + you're sick :-( 💭💫
cw: being sick in general, mention of vomiting, boys being really lovely
gunil
you're not lifting a finger.
he's got Everything covered, don't worry. don't even THINK about doing anything, he'll do it for you.
carries you around the house so you dont "tire yourself out" (?? you have a sore throat)
keeps you nice and warm <33 wraps you up in the blankets like a burrito. like a little shawarma sandwich. like a little cigar. like–
HOLDS YOU!! you know when you're so sick you feel like you're going to fall apart? he wraps his arms around you so gently and holds your pieces together so softly :-(
cooks nice healthy meals for you <3 makes sure to get all nutrients you need even if it's by going to the drugstore and buying supplements
showers with you because he's lowkey scared you'll faint with the heat – not that you mind having a strong body to prop yourself up against
jungsu
oldest child. takes care of you .
he's on edge for as long as you're feeling shitty. probably cussed jooyeon out for being too loud and then felt so guilty about taking his frustration out on him that he cried a little
Responsible!!
gets you gatorade, makes sure you drink plenty of water and eat light snacks through the day, will open every window so the room gets some air, takes your temperature, tells you to nap so your body has the energy to recover, gently wipes away that disgusting balmy feeling that only being sick brings
softly sings you to sleep :-(
if you're having stomach issues, he's holding your hair up and only cringing a little bit (also probably gets something soft for you to kneel on in front of the toilet – will camp out on the bathroom with you the whole night if needed)
jiseok
good entertainment + nearly makes you forget you're sick
talks a lot. tells you all about his day his week his month goes into tangents, talks about science and music and things you can barely understand just because he wants to take your attention away from the discomfort
puts his forehead to yours and says if i could i'd take the pain away :-( he's so sappy and he's half joking but you can feel how much he loves you and hates seeing you like this :-(
takes care of you as best as he can. tries to remember what his mom used to do when he got sick
has amazing sense of what to do due to being a science nerd. he might be gambling his luck but he's correct most of the time
if you're puking he's holding your hair and petting your back but he's NOT looking unless he wants to join you on the toilet
seungmin
gets everything you could possibly need and stays with you ;-(
if it's contagious then the windows are wide open he's got a mask on nothing could stop him
you need tylenol? he brought some from the bathroom when he entered the apartment!
you need a little cold patch? dw he bought one of those stick-on patches to save you from the mess of wet towels/cold compresses!
you're a little hungry? here he brought some light snacks in case your tummy wasn't feeling well!
uh oh the snacks didn't sit too well on your stomach? he has a gameplan already he's grabbing your little trashcan and brushing your hair away from your face!
you're feeling shitty after all of this? he brings you your toothbrush and water to wash out the aftertaste and he's settling beside you to pet your hair!
you still feel terrible? come on, a shower will help! he won't be able to shower with you seen as he's not keen on getting waterboarded by his mask but he will help you wash up even if his shirt gets soaked with the spray!
brushes your hair and dresses you up in comfy pajamas like you're his favorite doll afterwards :-(
hyeongjun
my lovely :-(
the best at keeping you company, be it sitting beside you with your fingers intertwined while you watch soft slice of life animes, be it laying down with you for emotional support cuddles, be it making you food and insisting on feeding it to you, be it telling you every thought that pops into his head so he can entertain you
lowkey loves when you feel like a cooked noodle and have jelly limbs because he gets to get everything for you, do everything for you, hold everything for you :-( don't count on him to carry you around though his limbs are not very .. uncooked noodle-y
will do Anything you ask him to. he might not know 100% what to do but yourself + google are good guides
brings his earbuds not to make any sound in case you have a headache, takes naps with you all day, lets you watch whatever he's doing on his phone (usually games or tiktok) (with very low volume!!)
forehead/temple kisses!!!! does the little "mm you have a fever" thing where he presses his lips to your forehead to gauge your temperature
if you want him Away from you because you're contagious, he's on the other side of the room doing his own things while you rot away in bed thinking what have i done i should've accepted the cuddles when i had the chance
jooyeon
cuddler!
if you have tummyaches he's rubbing your tummy!! if you have headaches he's massaging your head!! you have a sore throat?? do not worry he's keeping it warm because he has his face buried into your neck!!
pets your hair to sleep
he runs hot and if you have a fever he'll just sit by your side looking like a kicked puppy and holding your hand :-(
loves to help you wash up – will wash and condition your hair, soap you up, dry you with a fluffy towel afterwards, put on mosturizer all over you, will even brush your teeth for you if you let him (he's really touchy and adores caring for you and helping you feel like a human again)
definitely has the "well you got this Plague AT THE VERY LEAST yesterday. and we slept on the same bed and kissed on the mouth. if you're contagious, i'm getting sick anyway. i'm NOT being shooed away from my beloved when they're ailing." mindset
nevermind his dramatic ass. he's even more stubborn than he is theatrical and he WILL be by your side whatever anyone tells him
but gets sick too most of the time and acts like he's on his deathbed
105 notes · View notes
getosbf · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
Dont talk to me im very soft for them rn because billy sees sherlock brought fruits and automatically assumes they're for william meaning sherlock buying fruits for william is a regular occurrence between these three which ALSO means sherlock probably started bringing fruits for liam while he was recovering and i dont know about you but in my book "i want you to eat well" is the purest form of love
226 notes · View notes
crushedsweets · 6 months
Note
i was listening to twin size mattress by the front bottoms and was like. hmm this is the most toby song ever
SO i was wondering do u have any songs that remind you of specific creeps? could be from lyrics or just general vibes yk yk
- 🌙 anon (im new here hi)
HII welcome. ok ok. so i listen to music in a very boring way and never analyze lyrics/artists/albums/etc. but for you i will try to change.
Tumblr media
also these lryics with toby oh wow.. wow. ok. wowwww. wow. ok. wow. STUFF UNDER THE CUT BUT KNOW IM DEEPLY WARPING THE ACTUAL MEANING BEHIND A LOT OF THESE SONGS LOL. i religiously listen to love songs so its hard
toby and honey by coastal club. (my fave song rn..)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
whether its from his perspective or not.. it doesnt even have to be romantic either. just his friendships with everyone around him, both from people like tim and brian seeing this SEVERELY TROUBLED kid. . . 'wide eyed..dying to get outside' feels very :((( yk. he was a kid trapped in a fucking horrifying situation all his life. or him looking at his friendship with nina. "youve got a way with me... alive and so full of life, i'm mesmerized by your love" etc. maybe jack or clockwork with the "i started laughing at the words you spoke, i kinda like you and your stupid jokes"... AGAIN I KNOW ITS A LOVE SONG but i see it applying in so many different forms of love. and i love love. also a ton of like, car and driving references which is um. lyra reference sorry
nina x clockwork and "a big brown dog named bagel" by nep
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
ok this doesnt apply so much to my au(nobody is canon in mine but yk)... buttttttt... yeah. ugh. this is so nina @ nat. sorry guys ive been changed. one ask always diverts my attention at the speed of light. "I like the way she bites, the way she talks, the way she looks when I smile" is just SO FUCKING NINA ADORING NAT. nina just wants to be in the most fairytale coming of age movie ya novel lovestory and she says that her biggest dream in life is to get married. she wants to take care of her lover and give and give and give so fucking much and "I'll buy you a big old house on a big old hill And I'll grow old with my baby, 'til she's dead" is so very her. of course i chose clockwork cuz 'she's tall in the knees' and 'some green in her eyes' plus im a lesbian and havent fawned over sapphic relationships in months since i began my creepypasta return. LOL
eyeless jack and "downhill" by lincoln
Tumblr media Tumblr media
there r few words to describe the amount of guilt, horror, and devastation that jack feels after what he's done, all he's lost, and what he has to do to survive. he has a year of his life that he was literally possessed by a demon and went around fucking tearing humans apart and eating their remains. even as he's """recovering""" and settling into a cabin, his friendships with the creeps, trying to just feel okay. he's on his last leg, he can tell that people know he's a shell of what he was but they'll never know how warm, kind, inviting he used to be. "i went downhill at such a steep inline" ... yea he did his life changed immeasurably in a single night and it's never coming back. the lyrics "'Cause I was born into the world on a silken cloud / And I got bored of the world before I hit the ground" ... while he had a ton of pressure. he loved his life, loved his family, was the type to constantly express how grateful he was for everything that got him where he was. and then he hit rock fucking bottom because he wanted to chase a little excitement with the pretty girl inviting him to join a 'club.' poor guy
liu and "i'm not angry anymore" by paramore
Tumblr media Tumblr media
i dont think i need to explain this because um..... lols... liu just wants to fucking move on. he just wants to escape everything. he wants his family back, including the little brother he'd play catch with in the front yard for so many years. but he has his moments where it all comes barreling back, and he makes real fucking brash decisions - he lost his marriage because he spiraled trying to find jeff and moved to fucking alabama. so you know.
jane and "everest" by beabadoobee
Tumblr media Tumblr media
again, i dont think i need to explain this. maybe this could be mary(jane's wife) singing to jane, cuz she was one of janes main supports after her parents death. jane can only act strong for so long but she is so so so fucking sad and mourning and she was always so soft and gentle and sweet and she lost everything in a single night. she spent a short period of time filled with rage, as she would be, but her story eventually evolves into her just wanting to help others with their cases, be happy with her wife, take care of sally, grow old, make her parents proud. she's climbed mountains and is probably in the best place of all the creeps. holds her. i dont touch her character too often because i just want her to settle happily lolz..
ok thats all i got guys :3.. thank youuuuu thank youuu. sorry if my music taste is bad guys. LOL.
68 notes · View notes
drawnfamiliarfaces · 6 months
Note
I didnt watch rc9gn (sorry), but that question anon asked got me thinking:dont we already have amnesiac boy? *points at rex*?
Anon dont ever apologize for not having watched something, we all consume media/content at our own preference and pace!!! (I speak as a person who as of yet have not watched at least 5 major cartoons/shows of last decades lol) So its totally cool, always!
But YES you are totally right, Rex is another resident amnesiac in accordance to his canon show. It's actually one of the big bonding moments for him and Randy in HoM AU! ;D
However, the major difference between them is that Rex - started his 'hero' career after he lost his memory (the second time) and Randy - will canonically loose his memory at the end of his 'hero' career (or more like it ends his hero career). So you see their similar problems are also wildly different lol.
(um i went on a bit of a random rant about mostly Rex below, so you can read it of u want because im too lazy to delete it, but like, the point of the answer is above, so ye)
Technically Rex's amnesia is supposed to be a sort of 'chronic' debilitation that happens when he 'overloads'/ enters Titan mechabot state lol. But the show itself kind fibbled greatly with it (which annoys me to no end), because it seems that after the Nanite Event he periodically lost his memories so often, he kept a journal (when he was in the 'gang' with his friends) to keep track and later on Holiday and Five kept a close eye on him (i think it was implied he lost his memories at least once more at the care of Providence but i might be remembering wrong) in case his amnesia happened again. So, it seemed that his amnesia incidents got better with time, since we don't touch on the subject of him having another amnesiac episode almost throughout the whole show (and he even recovers several small memories!), until that damn finale.
At the end after the big fight, there was this sort of 'scare' of "Oh no! Rex saved the world but he forgot his family and friends!' but SYKE NO HE DIDN'T! And like... it wasn't completely explained, but i think it was implied that in that brief moment Rex was the Nanite Jesus Deity he somehow cured himself of amnesia i guess?? I was literally so mad about it, we were kind of building up to Rex making an ultimate sacrifice of his 'self' and it would have been such a great idea if he did loose his memory and have been allowed to (at least temporary) retire to his family home (of ex-werewolves) where he wouldn't be viewed as a weapon anymore, but... we get an ambigous 'some major villains escaped and are now at large' and thus Rex is still needed on the job and since he isn't amnesiac we dont even need to coerce him to fight! yay!
(can you tell im a little bit bitter about the end lol)
I mean I know the show was left in this sort of 'nothing changed' ambiguity for (im guessing) future possible continuation and/or for the GenRex brand, but its like my biggest annoyance from this show, which otherwise had such great storytelling! (in comparison to Ben10 AF&UA run lol)
That aside, what's up with Randy is different in a manner that his amnesia is something canonically inevitable and really scary if one thinks about it. 4 years of very life-changing experiences, of being a hero, just taken away would certainly reflect somewhat on him afterwards? I mean Im not sure how exactly mind-wipe work, (i dont remember all the details rn) but assuming it literally leaves you with gaps in your memories, without replacing them or something similar. So one of possible outcomes would be of post- mind wipe Randy feeling that he misses something from his life so keenly that it hurts him. Or perhaps human mind would work wonders of sort of 'filling' the gaps with vague false memories to not go insane, and after Randy would be constantly questioning that part of his life?
Many possiblities, but man I dunno, like, since rc9gn didnt have much in form of continuation so there is no extra info to explore.
But it does give me so much freedom to go completely bonkers in hom au (which i did man i went a really weird route ngl), because who's gonna stop me?? canon?????
...sorry this came out of nowhere, apparently i had a lot of feelings about Rex and his amnesia.
64 notes · View notes
azumasoroshi · 1 year
Text
minidura chapter 4 react
Tumblr media
simon i SWEAR ill get you out of there and that horrendous art style
also though. TEENAGE SHIZAYA CHAPTER LETS GO???? idk if narita made the minidura or if it's a separate illustrator but they are giving the FOOD rn
Tumblr media
i was wondering where the official knowledge that simon forced izaya and shizuo to eat sushi together came from. i mean i guess this isnt official and it was probably stated in the anime somewhere but still, good to see it illustrated pff
Tumblr media
AAAAAAAAA ive seen this image around tumblr but i didnt realize it was from minidura 😭 i thought it was fanart or smth (<-dumbass)
Tumblr media
wait im actually going crazy over this akwjhkjdshs they're washing dishes together!!! now we just need them to do laundry and taxes and-
im going to go over the image limit this time on god
Tumblr media
wow cant believe they're bathing each other too (<-delusional)
Tumblr media
something about the first shizuo panel reminds me of aggretsuko. which is. actually. huh. arent they both like adults with anger issues. durarara aggretsuko au when
also deadass i forgot dennis existed until i read about him in a shizaya fanfiction and i was like "who's dennis" pfgfkhkd
so true though never throw kitchen knives kids
Tumblr media
LMFAO HE JUST GAVE THEM MORE WORK INSTEAD OF RESPONDING
they're gonna be here all day at this rate. actually shizaya as fast food/restaurant staff au when because they'd have the stupidest rivalry known to man and i need it
fucking imagine shinra walks in and sees shizuo and izaya working by the counter
i hope izaya gets to eat fatty tuna by the end of this though. god knows he's gonna look cute as hell
Tumblr media
made funnier by the fact that izaya at least definitely knows how to cook with how long he's been on his own and needed to feed his sisters
Tumblr media
damn ive actually never seen someone's vein burst in a way where blood sprays out in anime akshGKJHJKSD thats impressive actually
dont look now but this may or may not inspire me to make a mermaid/pirate au (<-obsessed)
who needs kaiju battles when you can have blue fin tuna vs crab
Tumblr media
they're literally never leaving this place bro they're gonna be stuck here for eternity. anyway here's a literary analysis of durarara pointing out why russia sushi is actually representative of dante's inferno /j
Tumblr media
i want to read those blurbs so baddddd screams sobs bangs table
rip dennis dude he doesnt get paid enough to deal with shizaya
Tumblr media
rippp time to listen to izaya pine hopelessly for the man he cant stop annoying for five seconds
simon had the right idea. too bad shizaya are shizaya
Tumblr media
what is that face izaya. i cant tell if he's irritated that simon's right or irritated that simon cant understand how instinctual their hatred is or amused that simon thinks he and shizuo could be friends or amused because he thinks meaningless fighting is hilarious
Tumblr media
oh......that kind of hurts actually
i can imagine izaya suggesting it as a joke and then lying in bed that night thinking about how it's never going to happen and it really sounds like a funny joke huh? (he is not crying)
i cant believe simon's been dealing with these bitches for like 7 years now like dude has the patience of a saint
Tumblr media
😭give him his 50,000 yen simon
we can see that the crack in the sign is actually fixed now too ahhh time really flies when you're stuck in a relationship of mutual hatred
Tumblr media
chibizaya is so cuteeeeeeeee
im sure he intended to paint himself that way in his recollection though pff
Tumblr media
THATS RIGHT SHIZAYA BE THE PORCUPINES. SNUGGLE. DO IT
step aside erika, simon is the face of the shizaya nation now. especially with that "you just have a shizuo complex dont you" quote that i found the other day which i still havent recovered from
Tumblr media
HAUDGHUSDH orihara izaya, pro unreliable narrator
hilarious how we never see tom's face. just his dreads lmfao
dennis and simon are so done with like izaya bro i think they can tell at this point that he's horrifically pining and has no healthy outlet for it. the bills go to him because they're bullying him
it'd be funny if they billed him 50,000 at the end actually pft
Tumblr media
I KNEW WE'D GET THEM EATING TOGETHER!!! I HAD FAITH
they're so cute oh my god can i make that my header or something
10/10 chapter im going to punt izaya into a wall and get simon flowers
149 notes · View notes
nerves-nebula · 10 months
Text
yea so anyway mob/vigilante justice is always a bad idea. the people likely to get the brunt of that are always the most marginalized, the easiest targets, the ones no one will miss. we like to talk about csa a lot on this blog (and by we i mean i) and that includes a lot of you sending me very graphic and hyperbolic descriptions of violence you wanna commit against my abusive characters. which is fine (I mean it would have been better if you'd all asked before doing that but lucky for you I enjoy gore so w/e)
but if you like, actually genuinely want to "kill all rapists" or something then you are an untrustworthy person. that kind of lust for genuine violence is really reactionary and disconcerting. it doesn't come from a place of care and it kinda just makes it seem like you really want to hurt and/or murder someone but you're waiting for a good excuse (as in, a "bad enough" person) to do it.
even if you set aside the wave of queerphobia we're living through which asserts that all queer people, and especially openly queer people, are sexual predators (which im only setting aside because i dont have the energy to get into it right now) it's still wholly unhelpful to the actual victims of these crimes cause like. you're not supporting them. you're not giving them resources, you're just satiating your lust for violence and revenge on their behalf. and worst of all you're making accusations of sexual abuse a life or death scenario (even more than they already are for some people)
how is a kid supposed to feel comfortable telling you their parent is abusing them if they think you'll KILL that parent for it? Kids usually love their parents, or at least know that without them they'll have to fend for themselves. (I personally would be afraid that whatever adult i ended up with would be worse, and seeing how the foster care system in the USA is I don't think that fear is unfounded) and tbh a lot of rape & sexual abuse is weird and complicated. I certainly don't want my siblings killed for what they did to me.
you can say "oh that's different" all you want, and I won't even argue that there are some things people do that I personally think make them deserving of death, but it is not my right to go out and kill them. I refuse to acknowledge that anyone, any government or group of people have the right to just decide to murder people. because we all know the people they'll be murdering first and foremost aren't the powerful people who traffic children.
idk i could talk about this for hours but im unusually tired rn. maybe seeing this unthinking blood lust just depresses me. like, I think you guys just hear the word "pedo" or "sex offender" and black out with rage instead of having any coherent thoughts on what we can actually do to support people being sexually abused and keep them safe. I don't care about hurting abusers, I don't want more people hurt! I want the victims safe and recovering!
ack, whatever. don't try to justify your violent desires to me, i've seen enough violence for one lifetime.
71 notes · View notes
ivanzplaid · 9 months
Note
Lawrence Gorden helping a reader with burnout, autistic burnout if you’re comfortable writing it but burnout in general works. So glad you’re back!!
-📼
HI CASSETTE ANON OH MY FOD HELLO
you dont udnerstand the kevel of shock im in rn im SO HSPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU???? and of course, ill do it🙏🙏 youre always fueling my character needs so its only right that i return the favor fr
while i dont have autism, i wanna make sure this is sccurate, so if theres anything that should be changed or is harmful judt let me know :)
requests are open, masterlist is up!!!
Lawrence Gordon x Gn! Autistic! Reader + Burnout | Headcanons
------------------------------------------------------------
Headcanons
lawrence is a doctor, prepared for quite literally most physical and mental problems anyone may come across, so when he gets home from work one day to find his s/o laying down in a separate room with the door shut & it peaceful and calm, he has his suspicions
being the concerned boyfriend he is, he still checks up on you. he wants to make sure youre not hurt or anything along those lines
"Hey, a bit quite in here hm?" (failed joke crashed and burned so badly)
when he gets a nonverbal 'mhm' in an unusual tone, he takes it as a sign to order out some dinner and give both of you time to rest
he can sense to the least that your social battery is dead, or that its a bit overwhelming to talk right now, so he gets your favorite meal and slips into his more comfortable clothes
when the food gets there, he knocks once or twice before you let him in, and presents the food, asking if youd like to eat together or if you just wanna rest
he doesnt judge you for your answer, he understands your stressed and overwhelming you wont help, he just wants to see that youre cared for
if you say youd like to be with him, he'll bring up a chair and set on some quiet music you two like and would just rest in your presence after a long day, occasionally rubbing your hand if its alright with you
if you say no he gets that too, he knows that heightened sensory sensitivities arent easy to handle, and he doesnt want to make you feel like you have to mask around him to make him feel happy, so he'll put down your food and a drink and leave you be
he is completely understanding of your decisions during a burnout, and judt wants to do his best to comfort you because he genuinely cares about you
he'll make sure your next dates are lowkey, so that you dont have to mask, and so that there isnt extra stress put onto you
will bring you some extra little things he thinks youd like, leaving them around the house for you to find, trying to boost your mood
gives you little reassurances here and there, taking the form of little phrases and physical comfort
"Got this for you, just something small that stood out."
does everything in his ability to help you, hes decently educated on the topic and the symptoms, so he tries to aid you in recovering from it
56 notes · View notes
demelly · 5 months
Note
i just found your re7 au welcome home and i am going INSANE. absolutely BONKERS. I fucking love it man. have you ever thought of any alt versions of it where like... ethan and clancy get out or????
Oh boy do i. 😁
We made an entire branch of welcome home where they escape and it genuinely makes me so sad ive cried over it while talking about it HHAHAQ, [it is alot of clethan so hope ur okay with that!!!!! Im crazy about them!!!!]
the entire reason that ethan is “choosing” to stay at the bakers is because he’s desperate to find mia. And while clancy understands he also doesnt think ethan should be risking his life this place is like absolutely insane fr GAHAHQ, the more they get to know eachother in the bakers the more ethans fearin for clancys life he dont want him to die hes his only friend rn fr!!!! So when the time comes that clancys becomin desperate and body slammin into boarded up windows on the top floor. Hes lookin at ethan desperately to come with him and ethans hesitating because mia <\\\33 but also clancy!!! Its a dilemma fr and hearin jack callin his name is what convinces him fr they help eachother run from the bakers [hand in hand] 😈
They’re dealing with their traumas fr 😢 and theyre helping eachother recover slowly 😢 They both know that if they told anyone else what happened no one would believe them fr so theyre jus relying on eachother and bein healthy and silly and domestic. And cuddling when they have nightmares😢
i could go on and on ab why clethan would be so good but ill spare u the lecture HAJAJ
31 notes · View notes
naniiebimworks · 8 months
Text
Tired stuff.
there are some times you definitely know your creative fuel tank is completely at negative, and its hard to know what to do except wait a bit for it to hopefully recover. Next few weeks has a bunchton of responsibilities i cannot delegate, altho i'm peppering it with nice things to watch or read, i'm just really tired while unable to rest because im bad at doing nothing, and the above responsibilities hanging over my head.
Mid con prep and mid order pack and mid graphic design and illustration while being displaced from my studio area while the window ledges are being painted, so a bit of a storm in a teacup, but all the small irritations and delays added on top. I know why im off kilter, but it doesnt mean that there is much i can do to fix it yet.
Packing is always very physical and i cant do it in the studio rn where all the packing stuff is because of the painting, so i'm running up and down stairs to do it in the livingroom then having to tidy up and move stuff so partner can chill in there. Making lables is another long job, and then running it to the post depot is another thing that has to be timed carefully to the hour its open in the morning. I cant use post offices anymore because theyre staffed by people who are mainly employed for the attached convenience store and they fucking hate your guts and take as long as possible to process your parcels, while also trying to man the till. (In comparison, the post depot just scans the labels now. Post offices make you re-weigh parcels, then they take 5 min per parcel typing in the address into the system. This is with labels on. I gave up. I had one PO woman sneer at me for just wanting them scanned and sent, so i absolutely stopped using that PO.
Convention prep also involves checking the kit, getting travel organised and various things to remember to check or charge the day before, and the worry that people are going to be arsey about us setting up on saturday instead of friday, and the venue possibly threatening to refuse us the space we paid for because we didnt do things exactly. I know people are usually nicer than this, but ive also had people just be assholes too, and im too tired to cope with bad issues and deal with an intense weekend.
Yeah, dont be self employed, you'll probably die early without a nest egg.
Oh, ps, make your will as early as u can, its not morbid. Save your survivors some fuss and headaches, cos im having to bloody research notaries when i have a moment to myself eventually to sort out somthing expensive that could gave been easier with a will.
34 notes · View notes
the-final-sif · 2 years
Text
So, Ponk needs to leave, and Sam is the only one who can watch Dream while he’s gone. There’s absolutely nothing that could go wrong with this plan, and Dream just needs to somehow convince Ranboo and Punz of that. He’s really not having much luck.
Ponk asked several times to make sure Dream was... well comfortable was a hell of an ask, but at the very least sure in his choice to let Sam watch over him.
The two of them managed to figure out the terms of what Sam could be told. Dream assented to Sam being told that he was having temporary balance and hearing issues related to the Warden’s sonic attack. It’s important to Dream that Ponk stress that this is all temporary. And that Dream is still capable of doing stuff himself if he needed to, it’s just that Ponk couldn’t ethically leave him alone as a doctor.
Ponk agrees to all of that, and tastefully doesn’t point out that there are risks of long term damage, and that Dream absolutely could not be left alone without the risk of that long term damage increasing.
Sam’s job will just be bringing specific food (no more soup, only things that Dream can eat on his own, and from a specific list of rabbit safe items which pointedly does not include potatoes) help with Dream getting over to the bathroom for at least a few days, and help administer the ear drops.
Ponk also gives Dream like three knives with special handles just in case, because like, yeah good mobility is great but a sharp knife swung wildly will still do a hell of a lot of damage to someone whose unarmored, which is a requirement for Sam to be anywhere near Ponk’s house. Sam has been told there are safeguards in place, but not given any more details to prevent attempts to circumvent them.
Ponk himself has heavily mixed feelings, but it’s the only real option they have since the only other person staying behind that he could even think to ask is Punz, and Ponk is sure that Punz would sell Dream out. He already did it once, clearly he’d do it again. Sam hasn’t sold Dream out despite already knowing where he is and at the very least that he wasn’t in great condition, so despite his apprehensions, Ponk makes the call to leave helping Dream up to him.
 Ponk tells the rest of the server that he’s getting packed up to leave, and that Sam will be staying at his house to recover safely. Nobody should bother him since he needs lots of rest and is nervous about having other people around while his vision is still healing. Message ahead if they need to visit.
Ponk leaves that evening, hoping everything will be okay when he gets back. If nothing else, he’s got a special upgrade for his communicator that will allow for check ins every so often.
Meanwhile, Dream sits and stares at his communicator for about half an hour, trying to decide how to break the news to Punz and Ranboo who heard about Ponk going on the trip and were making suggestions for plans.
He considers lying, he really does, but if he says he’s unsupervised then they’ll want to come by and discover his lie.
So he decides to just say fuck it.
“slight change of plans. ponk has to go to the raid. cant really walk rn, or balance. will be better soon. sam already knew and on truce bc of hunters, offered to help while ponk has to leave. should only be for a week. safeguards in place. everything should be back to normal in two weeks. will resume contact at that point.”
He really wanted to just leave it there and refuse to respond to messages after that, but he knew that was liable to end very poorly.
It took about 10 seconds for punz to reply, followed directly by Ranboo.
“absolutely not.”
“^”
Dream started trying to type out a response, only for Punz to cut him off.
“i’m coming to get you.”
Fuck, no, they absolutely could not do this. Dream was fine. Nothing was going to go wrong.
“dont you dare, it’s fine, there’s safeguards and we’re on truce because of the hunter’s involvement. i won’t let him do anything. ponk gave me weapons and a few special potions. it’s totally under control. i did not go through pandora just for you to ruin your cover now.”
It was a low blow, but hopefully one that would get Punz to listen.
There was a long, long pause. Finally, Punz replied.
“you check in every day, twice a day. if you miss either check in, ranboo kills him and we get you to safety.”
Okay, thank god, Dream could work with this. He almost agreed right away, before pausing to consider feasibility.
“if i miss a checkin, ranboo can check my room at ponks. im sleeping a lot and tracking time is hard right now. theres no reason for me to be out of the room without checkin though. if one of you can sneak a tracker in here, i can stick it on my comm if that’ll convince you. if anything goes wrong, ill send a message for help.”
The message for help would be going to Foolish, not them, but Dream didn’t need to clarify that. It was a valid technicality. There was another pause, before finally he got the response he was hoping for.
“fine. ill drop off a tracker in a bit.”
A beat, and then another text followed.
“please be safe.”
It left a lump in Dream’s throat, it made all the anxiety about Sam being anywhere near him, let alone in charge of bringing him food and fuck, his knife wasn’t enough, this was such a stupid fucking idea-
For one singular, terrible moment, Dream almost caved. He reached out, wanting to send a message asking for Punz to come get him. To get him somewhere safe and far away from Sam, because he couldn’t do this again.
But his hands were shaking too much to type. Whether from his most recent damage or that from the prison, he couldn’t tell, but it reminded him of how much he’d already given up. He’d done so much to get to this point. He couldn’t waste everything now. It would be worth it in the end. When things were okay again.
He bit down the urge to ask for help like a child and instead focused on the rational. The logical. If Sam wanted to take him back to the prison or hurt him, he would’ve just called Quackity from the start. Not Ponk. He would’ve just told the server where Dream was before a bunch of people left.
Clearly, Sam felt indebted and like taking advantage of something the hunters had caused was unfair. Dream could use that for now, and once he was well enough to run, he would do so and then things would go back to exactly how they were before. Both of them could forget that anything ever happened here. It was invalid. Struck from the record.
So he took a deep breath and got himself under control. After a moment, he managed to steady his hands enough to type.
“i’ll be fine.“
With that, he shut off his communicator and flopped back on the bed. Exhausted as he repeated that one little phrase over and over again in his head, hoping to find a way to make it stop tasting like a lie.
215 notes · View notes