#i find it so easy to communicate my issues with them without passive aggressiveness | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

enneamage · 2 years

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do you have any deduction about what happened with beeduo? some say it was the circumstances, but i think that they weren't as compatible as they thought (an online friendship is very different than living with the person) and they rushed things but Idk. would you do an enneagram about them?

I’m doing a twofold disclaimer for this one—I wasn’t watching Tubbo or Ranboo at the time they were living together, and am mostly working off of the scraps that other people have highlighted in retrospect. This is primarily inductive thinking, meaning that instead of taking big pieces and making them smaller, I’m taking small pieces and making them bigger using what I’ve got. This means that I’m swinging real wide for them and am probably missing massive practical details.

I’ll start this off by citing one of my sources, the “trouble spots or issues” section of this relationship matrix, or as I like to call it the great big book of breakups.

Both Twos and Nines tend to give away their power and to go along with the agendas of others. Yet, one of the parties will have to wear the pants in the family, taking charge and making decisions. Doing so goes against the grain of both types, although either will take charge if necessary. However, negotiating power and decision making in a Two/Nine couple puts both parties under increasing stress and both tend to feel that they are being forced into the bad guy role in the family—and that they will be resented and unloved while their partner gets off the hook. Further, neither finds it easy to talk about their feelings or their growing discontent with the power balance in the relationship, or with any other sources of resentment and potential conflicts that they may have. Twos tend to actually take over too much, becoming domineering and controlling, not hesitating to boss the Nine around and to speak with surprising harshness to him or her. But because Twos can rationalize their motives and see themselves only as all loving, they can continue without feeling guilty or embarrassed. Nines find it difficult to find their own voice and to speak up for themselves. But when the Nine actually does speak up, the Two often takes this as a lack of gratitude and tries to turn the Nine's comments around on them. Twos are not good at taking criticism, and when Nines find the courage to speak up, they may go overboard with a load of old resentments that have pilled up. The result is that Nines withdraw into silence and become passive-aggressive as a way of dealing with their anger, while Twos feel unappreciated, misunderstood, and rejected. Both try to keep everything quiet and normal on the surface, although they begin to deteriorate into longer silences with each other-and more distance, including less physical contact. An air of tension takes over, punctuated by angry outbursts and recriminations. The couple that seems so unassuming and supportive tends to end through attrition and drifting apart. Nobody wants to talk about what has really happened, no body wants to take responsibility for the deterioration of the relationship, and things eventually simply fall apart.

It's looking like they largely went the way of the write-up. Tubbo was more on the side that didn’t communicate, and Ranboo was on the side that wasn’t good at taking information for what it was. When Twos are in the grips of feeling like they need to intervene in other peoples lives to feel alright, they can have a hard time seeing scenarios for more than opportunities to do something. Nines can respond by bottling themselves up and making themselves smaller as a defensive move, retreating away from the problem. This seems like a pattern that has carried on until today, Tubbo is still retreating from Ranboo, and Ranboo may still be trying to reach out and 'make things better.' (If it really would be better for both of them is... unclear.)

At this point it looks like Tubbo has so heavily associated being around Ranboo with being controlled that he can’t tolerate it, at all. On the other side, Ranboo has only fairly recently made peace with the idea of being disliked by strangers, let alone old flames, so this is going to take a while. I hope the two of them can grow past this, not in a making-up way, but in the broader sense of leaving some of the habits that got them in trouble with each other behind.

When someone just gets you and you feel like you flow into each other smoothly, it’s easy to forget that you still need to be able to communicate, especially if you’ve never had to do it before and don’t have the instincts. Learning communication, as well as how to listen and peacefully negotiate, is kind of like breaking and re-setting a bone. It is not something that is encouraged as a skill through most young life, and then suddenly you need to re-learn everything because the old method isn’t working anymore. These two caught each other at an awkward time in their lives where those skills were even less developed than the presumed adults in the Two/Nine breakup, so these teenage gamer boys are still dealing with the fallout of their own natures as well as each others.

#tbbo 9w8 #rnbo 2w3 #I thought I was going to have to do a lot more heavy lifting with this one #but then I looked at the webpage and went 'nope this is about it'#it's eerie when this happens

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luveline · 2 years

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Thank you so much! Okay so I've been working there for just shy 4 years and have been a manager for 1 year. The store has gone through a lot of GMs in my time there, but he's the only one that I've actually had an issue with. From the second that he started he has done nothing but run the store into the ground. Within his first 2 months our entire night crew quit because of him harassing them about call outs and taking time off, but they were kids okay? They were about to graduate and had a lot of things to do? It wasn't like he was never told in advance. He is always scheduling people outside of their availability and gets mad when they don't show up at their scheduled time. I've always worked opens, but just recently he decided to put me on closes without consulting me about it. There is no communication from him ever. If you try to ask him about something, he will either say I don't know or just flat out ignore you. There was one morning that I went in and the store was actively flooding. I called him and my supervisor multiple times with no response. Eventually I texted him to come get his store because it was flooding. He texted me back an hour later and his response? "What?" He didn't call me back, didn't try to find out if it was under control or if we were open on time and then actually showed up 20 minutes late. It was dumb luck that someone from Maintenace had shown up to look at something and helped me shut the water off. He hired this one guy who started sexually harassing all of the girls, including myself. He was in his 30s and most of these girls were barely legal and not even out of high school yet. He refused to ever actually do anything about it and eventually the guy got fired for not showing up. AND THEN HE HIRED HIM BACK. He's so rude and passive aggressive all the time and it makes everyone so uncomfortable. He's always making mistakes and then blames it on everyone else. We've been having problems with money going missing from the safe, drawers being short, and he always goes to me about it even though he knows it don't happen on my shift. Doesn't matter if I worked that day or not, he jumps down my throat about it. I've never been confrontational, normally I would just stay quiet and let these things happen because I don't want to upset anyone, but this has been really taking a toll on my already fragile mental state. I don't really want to leave, my team has been my second family and I don't want to abandon them, but I feel like it's something I really need to do. It's not really acceptable here for people to go over their boss' head to upper management, but I don't know what would be appropriate. What makes it harder to do is that my current supervisor is very new to the company and I would rather speak to someone more familiar with myself and my boss because I feel like they would have a better understanding of the issues, but I don't want to in turn go over her head either and make her feel like I don't trust her. It's common practice for our franchise to rotate GMs, but it's always done at random and we never know when it's gonna happen. I'm looking for another job now, but I'm unsure if I should just stick it out here and wait for him to be replaced, or if I should just jump ship and move on.

Absolutely I think you should jump ship! I've only had one job and it wasn't a career so please take anything I say with a huge pinch of salt. I really wouldn't know what the best course of action is for you BUT but but I really think what's most important is your well being and it feels like this guys is just throwing you into mental and actual danger. I'm so sorry to hear about the sexual harassment you've been experiencing, and it sounds to me that your boss is really mistreating you and it is not okay, you deserve the best and I don't think anything is worth such a huge sacrifice of your happiness. But of course its never as easy as just quitting. I really am so sorry, I hope that whatever you do you'll feel happier!

#jade's asks #ily

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gumuhit · 3 years

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#art #i used to be so guilty abt my lack of willingness to be a better person in my familial relationships #its just so hard #meanwhile its the opposite with friends/partners #i find it so easy to communicate my issues with them without passive aggressiveness #if i could be this good w friends why couldnt i be the same my parents?#its like fuck #i wish its that easy #i had to remind myself that im unlearning two-decade old patterns and behaviors #ones that im not even aware of #my friendships were built when i could already make concious choices #it makes sense why its so easy with them #gumuhit

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perriwinklesblog · 3 years

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I feel a lot of people missed certain parts of the Tubbo and Quackity argument because theres a lot of “Tubbo was being aggressive” and “Tubbo refused to even compromise” going around.

So we’re going to go through many of the questions people have with the whole argument.

(It should be noted, it’s very clear that I am current on summer hols from uni as I put too much time into this long ass post. You don’t need to read it, this is very self-indulgent. I am bored so I analysed.)

Here are the questions covered;

This Land is My Land, This Land is Your Land: Does Tubbo have the right to build there?

I See You For What You Truly Are, which is UGLY: Is Quackity in the right asking Tubbo to tear down his structure due to how it looks?

Cookie Outpost: Threat or Passive Player?

That’s Not Fair: Why wouldn’t Tubbo try and compromise?

You Started It So I’m Finishing It: Why did Tubbo instigate and threaten violence?

Conclusion: The World Is Wide Enough.

1. This Land is My Land, This Land is Your Land: Does Tubbo have the right to build there?

Short answer. Yes.

Many people are putting real-world logic into this RP world, and whilst in the real world, Tubbo wouldn't be in the right here. However, what Tubbo has done in this RP world is perfectly acceptable, even if it is annoying.

The rules of this world are different to that of our own.

We must accept this. Regardless of whether you find similar situations that mirror real-world events, the Dream SMP (DSMP) has different unspoken and spoken rules than our own.

With that in mind, looking at the planning of structures and claiming land, it is very different from what we would typically see in the real world. There is no local government with a planning committee to go to for structures you want to build. You do not need to get approval to build structures. If there is a free space with no claim to it, you can create what you like. (Within reason, as long as it's not offensive, minus a penis as it is clear that the majority of this world do not find the phallic symbol to be offensive)

Whilst there have been retail estate agents on the DSMP who sell land to others, they first had to mark and claim the land to prevent someone just building on it. Marking the land with either fenceposts or a sign or outlining it with blocks is usual to claim something on the DSMP. Another way to claim land you wish to build upon, is to tell people and/or your chat so that when someone else comes across the land and starts to build, they then warn that the land has been claimed. Making it is the safest option to go with as many streamers know that chats can, and will often, lie. So without markers, it is assumed that the land is free and therefore up for grabs to build on. First come, first served.

This is what Quackity had done with Las Nevadas. We've seen people come across Las Nevadas before structures were built. Quackity had marked out areas for each building and signed it, showing those who had come across that the land they were walking on was claimed and could not be built upon. However, Quackity did not claim outwith that area, which is why it was so easy for Wilbur to find a place so close to Las Nevadas. Wilbur could claim his rival city out of pettiness much easier as there were no clear cut borders. Quackity did not outline the areas in which he wanted to expand, and therefore it was free land. He hadn't staked a claim on it. Quackity had thought it out but had not staked an actual claim.

Now, you could argue that was his plan and that he hadn't had time to outline where he wished to expand next. But that's not how the server works. When it comes to land, it is a first-come, first-serve scenario. Unless you take proactive measures to protect the land you have plans for, someone else can and will build there.

Quackity had not said to anyone canonically before Tubbo's Outpost that he was expanding there. He hadn't made the boundaries clear of the land he wished to stake a claim on, and therefore it stayed as free land.

So whilst what's happened to Quackity with plans of expansion stalling, this wouldn't have been an issue if he had been more apparent with boundaries. But, annoyingly for him, the perimeters of the DSMP, Tubbo has every right to build there as it was still free land.

Now, this brings us onto the building itself,

2. I See You For What You Truly Are, Which Is UGLY: Is Quackity in the right asking Tubbo to tear down his structure due to how it looks?

Short answer, no.

Again this comes back to the DSMP rules being different to real-world ones.

Now in many parts of the world, there are systems and hurdles you have to go through to get planning permission for a structure you wish to build, even if you own the land it will be on. You have to get the architectural plan approved by a committee a lot of the time. Neighbours often are allowed to object to structures or whole communities being allowed to at least say their grievances before the committee passes on the plan. Sometimes the committee will agree with the project even if there are grievances. Everywhere is slightly different, but there are systems in place for these discussions at the end of the day.

But not in the DSMP.

People can build whatever structure they want, no matter how ugly, as long as it is on their land or free land. So if they claim a bit of land and go, "I want to build an ugly thing", then they are allowed, even if it ruins the look of the thing next to them.

Is it rude? Yes. But does that mean they're not allowed? No.

Tubbo's structure is imposing for Quackity mainly because of the walls. He wasn't happy with the design when he first saw it before this wall, but the wall pointing directly at his nation was too much for him. Quackity finds them imposing and threatening, but it was technically on free land, so Tubbo can build them. Quackity does not have a right in the rules of the DSMP to have Tubbo tear down his walls due to how he perceives them. Although emotionally, it'd be great to see those walls come down in all parties.

He can issue with them and grumble but technically, within the unspoken rules of the DSMP, Tubbo's allowed to have them there.

Is it a bit rude of Tubbo to not have gone, "Hey, by the way, I'm building these walls around my structure; this is as close as I'm planning on this wall getting to your area, is that fine"? Yes, it was rude. But is he therefore not allowed to do that? No. He's allowed to build what he wants on free land that he has claimed.

So again, whilst aggravating for Quackity, Tubbo is allowed to build those walls.

Now to focus on the incident itself. There are many things, bear with;

3. Cookie Outpost: Threat or Passive Player?

The underlying cause of this argument is more to do with the perception of the building, walls included, than the actual placement.

Quackity could have found ways to move around the Outpost, such as dig a road under a new patch of land, etc. There are solutions to the outpost problem. Technically, Wilbur's only claimed a tiny bit of ground to easily have focused on building around the small building Wilbur made etc. Unlike Tubbo, Wilbur hasn't made his intentions clear where his areas borders are, and therefore, Quackity could use the same logic as Tubbo and the same logic of how land claimant works in the SMP against Wilbur. But instead, he focuses on Tubbo and places more energy in engaging with Tubbo than with Wilbur or Tommy. He views Wilbur and Tommy as more of a nuisance whilst Tubbo poses as a threat. He views Tubbo as a threat well before the actual threat from Tubbo and the proper knowledge of the nukes.

We often forget to take into account that canonically the audience knows more than half the DSMP members.

Philza is the only one who indeed acknowledges and reminds us of this fact. Others dance around or ignore the idea as sometimes they like to use the chat in their role-play to gain knowledge. But whether they've used chat in the past or not, the audience will always know more. So we read up upon and about streams we've missed and watch more perspectives allowing us a greater insight that canonically no one else gets. Unfortunately, the only understanding we have yet to grasp is Dream, which is not relevant to this current scenario.

We have to note what Quackity and Tubbo know and what we know and separate it with this understanding.

From Tubbo's perspective;

Tubbo heard of Las Nevadas, saw many people leaving for Las Nevadas and wanted to investigate. One of his citizens had emigrated to Las Nevadas, so there was a natural curiosity of what they are doing that's attracting everyone. So he initially wanted to create a very secret hiding place to spy on Las Nevadas to see what they were doing, much like what he did with the Egg.

The main objective: to observe.

The last organised group of people on the DSMP was the Eggpire. They were a nuisance for some people and a threat for many others, including Tubbo. So a new nation and a new group would naturally have Tubbo a little wary and very curious. Not to mention that this new nation was an old friend's latest project.

Those who watch Tubbo know that whilst he managed to create a small place to observe the Egg from, Tubbo often makes or desires big builds. Canonically small himself in height but loves a big house. So very quickly, the building itself becomes noticeable and more prominent than intended. Tubbo also likes substantial structured buildings leading to quite a sturdy looking outpost.

The Outpost style fits very much with Snowchester's style and the environment it is in. (As a side, he may not conically say he's a goat hybrid, but he chose a very mountain goat place to settle here). Whilst he continues to build his Outpost, he decides to build walls around it as a defence if anyone tries to sneak in or attack. The walls are reminiscent of the ones he made around Snowchester, again adding to the similarities between the two places he's decided to put roots. And again, it fits very much within the environment he's created. He adds a lava door as another defence but then decorates the courtyard for visitors. The lava door and walls keep people he doesn't want inside out but not to keep everyone out indefinitely. Again, he's establishing what his area is.

Tubbo understands that his area is not very secret, and the main goal is still to observe everything that is happening in Las Nevadas but knows he needs a cover since people are also asking what he's doing. So a cookie shop becomes the cover. A cover he gets quite into with the help of Ranboo. So with that, he needs to expand and make room for a farm and expand further onto the free land available. So the wall which becomes the centre of the argument with Quackity is built. This wall extends towards Las Nevadas but does not cross the river. Where it stops when they are interrupted with the Las Nevadas retaliation was as far as Tubbo was going to build it. The plan from there was to have to go back. The walls had gone from being purely defensive of the outpost building itself to indicating boundaries and what was Tubbo's land and what was still free land.

Tubbo added the bridge to connect his Outpost to Quackity's land to make it easier for both parties to visit each other. Quackity responded by linking it up properly but creating a toll.

When watching Tubbo's perspective and hearing his plans for the Outpost, it comes across as very passive. It was designed to be a place where he could keep up to date with what was happening and see what was going on without directly involving himself. He wanted to observe, and with his militant wired brain, he also needed some defences just in case. An argument often backed by the fact that almost all his builds on the server have been blown up, burnt down, or destroyed somehow. A fact, Quackity knows and feels too.

So for Tubbo, Outpost = Passive Player.

For Quackity's Perspective;

Quackity built Las Nevadas as a place where he can belong without proving it to others or compromising with others. This place is his and his alone where his laws and his rules are the only ones. People have to bend to him. People have to answer to him. He presents it as a safe haven from the chaos and a place to find a home, find family, and be one together. However, it is always on his terms. He will take others ideas and wrap them so they fit his narrative and plan but make it, so the others believe he is listening to them.

A case in point is the whole torture thing with Dream and Sam. He had an idea, he had a plan and then used a narrative Sam bought into, then twisted Sam's thoughts into fitting with his plans. It's a little bit more complicated than that but boiled down to the basics, yeah.

Whilst Quackity is the antagonist in many plot points right now, the heart of it all is centred on having a home, a place where he belongs and doesn't feel the need to constantly fight for it, to feel it threatened by outside sources continually. He just wants somewhere safe... where he can scam people so he can be rich.

With all that in mind, when Wilbur shows up, and their interaction descends into pettiness, it puts him on edge. He knows that Wilbur is stubborn and that Tommy is also determined. So whilst Quackity has the upper hand over them, which is why they're not seen as a threat more of an annoyance, they still started to sow the seeds in Quackity's mind that Las Nevadas was not as safe of a home as he first thought.

Now we could go into all the illogical ideas about Las Nevadas, such as open to all but not, pay a toll to get here, free to live and leave but sign your soul to me, and we welcome everyone but omfg why are you all here leave my home alone. We could go into the tortured soul of Quackity, but the focus is right now on why Tubbo's Outpost and wall created a more extensive argument and reaction than Wilbur and Tommy's blatant threat ever did.

When Quackity first saw and mentioned the Outpost, the walls were not as long; they stayed pretty close to the building itself. However, even when he was told this place might've been a Cookie shop, he didn't fully believe it. His mind immediately went to threat and annoyance. This is probably due to the interaction with Wilbur. His reaction would probably have been the same if anyone had built it there. It is close to his land, and he doesn't know why it's there. When it's mentioned to be Tubbo's property, his worries are not immediately erased; instead, he almost doubles down in the idea that Tubbo is threatening him. He sees the bridge and is even more enraged by it. He builds a toll as a way to deter Tubbo from crossing into his land. Then Quackity, Slime and Fundy go to the Outpost to snoop, finding ordinary building materials along with gunpowder and two totems, leading to Quackity to double down in his fear that Tubbo wants to destroy this happiness he's cultivated. They then grief the place to threaten Tubbo and show Tubbo that they will not stand for threats.

Overall, from Quackity's perspective, Outpost = Threat

But at the end of the day, Quackity's knowledge of the Outpost is that it is a Cookie Shop. That has all that's been shown to him. That is all his character canonically knows, and even though it looks imposing to him, he shouldn't fear a cookie post. To him, Tubbo is a good kid, so why has he jumped and stuck to the narrative that the place is a threat, that the cookie shop will destroy his happiness?

Now Tubbo built the Outpost as a passive observation base. Therefore technically, the Cookie Outpost is passive, but Quackity places the idea that this place is a threat to the minds of Las Nevadas citizens and creates the idea that this building is a threat to their country. Regardless of whether it was a place for the Snowchester leader to spy, it was still a passive building where Tubbo did not want to attack anyone or anything. Spying does not equal threat. So again, Quackity is the one to impose the idea of a threat upon Las Nevadas, not Tubbo.

So now this Outpost exists in two states, and that's where the conflict is arising.

4. That's Not Fair: Why wouldn't Tubbo try and compromise?

Short answer, he did try.

Tubbo tried to compromise. Tubbo could see where Quackity was coming from; he understood and said to Quackity he understood and tried to explain that he wasn't attacking Las Nevadas. Tubbo said that was as close as he was going to get with the walls, but Quackity was the one who ignored him and didn't believe him.

Whilst the walls started as defensive, they were now mainly used to discern from what was Tubbo's land and what wasn't, which is why Tubbo didn't want to give up the new wall. So instead, he tried to mark out and defend his farm, in line with Cookie Outpost, which meant walls.

The solutions Quackity offers are all offers that benefited Las Nevadas and his plans, not his new neighbour Tubbo. Tubbo didn't understand why Quackity came in so aggressively so suddenly. The last they spoke, they at least left on civil terms, and both said they considered each other a friend, yet Quackity does not believe what Tubbo is telling him, doesn't believe that Tubbo doesn't want to harm him. Tubbo is also a bit annoyed by the fact that the solutions all take a hit to him when in his eyes, he didn't even build on Las Nevadas property and didn't even know of future plans Quackity supposedly had for Las Nevadas.

Eventually, Tubbo agrees to take down the wall if they come up with boundaries to the land to know what is his and what is Las Nevadas. He suggests the natural border of the river as that was what he was following anyway. He also offers it as it keeps the place looking nice since Quackity initially said the issue was how imposing the wall was to his nation.

This is a compromise. Tubbo and Quackity both get the things they want as the cost of the wall, the issue at hand. But Quackity and Las Nevadas say no to this proposal, and once again, they are running around in circles.

Other compromises were proposed, but again, most of them suited Quackity over Tubbo and therefore were more of a relinquish of power than a compromise. The solution Tubbo gave was one in which there wouldn't be a power imbalance between the two nations and would have left both on equal footing. But Quackity said no because he needs Tubbo below him power-wise.

Like Tubbo with his walls to protect what he loves, Quackity wishes to preserve his happiness and joy through control. He needs to control the situation, the environment and the people around him so that they do not say or do anything to jeopardise the life he has created. He cannot have Tubbo in an equal position to him, and therefore all solutions Quackity offers leave Tubbo below him.

So Tubbo did try and compromise, he just wasn't going to take a solution that didn't leave him, and Quackity equal, much like Quackity wasn't going to take a solution that didn't leave him above Tubbo.

5. You Started It So I Am Finishing It: Why did Tubbo instigate and threaten violence?

Short answer, he wasn't the instigator.

Whilst Tubbo was a bit rude and inconsiderate, the first instigation and threat of violence came from Quackity's side.

As mentioned before, upon first viewing Tubbo's place with Slime and Fundy, Quackity decides to send a message to Tubbo not to threaten them by essentially threatening Tubbo himself. They trash the site and leave it in ruin. This is the first act of aggression. There is also the fact that Quackity was willing to take things further by stealing Tubbo's totems, and if it had not been for Fundy suggesting that he was going too far, he probably would have taken them.

At this stage, Quackity and Tubbo have not spoken, have not adequately interacted for months. Quackity grief's the place without even asking Tubbo what he's doing, without talking things through with Tubbo. Quackity said he would ask him what was happening and whether this place was a threat but then proceeded to treat it as a threat and grief the place to send a message to Tubbo.

Ranboo then cleans the place up, placing signs to reinforce the idea that it's a cookie shop. This hides the altercation from Tubbo and ultimately makes Quackity's next more seem even more aggressive and over the top than before.

In Tubbo's eyes, this has come out of nowhere, whilst Quackity feels he is pre-empting an inevitable that he had no guarantee on.

It isn't until things start to get a bit heated that Quackity decides to try and talk things out with Tubbo. Until this moment, Tubbo had been working on the defensive. Even when he hadn't realised Quackity had threatened him before. Tubbo's Outpost and stance in this situation had always been defensive and passive until Quackity started to push at Tubbo.

Tubbo's threat of the nukes came after all the negotiations and arguing and directly responded to the energy Quackity was giving Tubbo. Tubbo wasn't the first to push, it was Quackity, and Tubbo just pushed back and essentially told Quackity, do not underestimate me.

Tubbo doesn't want to use the nukes; that was not the point of Snowchester's nukes. He doesn't want to destroy anything; it is just to make sure people do not destroy his things. Tubbo, although more feral than the feral boys, does not crave violence; like Quackity (or at least before Quackity enjoyed torturing Dream), he wishes for a peaceful place where he can work on his projects; his end goal isn't destruction.

Tubbo pulling the nuke card was not an attack, but a defensive response to everything Quackity had put on the table.

It felt like an extreme response, but Tubbo has seen how far Quackity goes with things and how hard Quackity is willing to fight for what he wants. So Tubbo needed to shock Quackity and remind Quackity that they are equals, they are equal in power and that should he forget, Tubbo will happily remind him.

Overall. Tubbo did not instigate but react.

Both parties threatened each other, but it was Quackity who threw the first punch.

6. Conclusion: The World Is Wide Enough.

The issue with Quackity and Tubbo is more about the relationship and their perception than the building itself.

In posts before, I talked about how one of the significant communicative issues between Tubbo and Quackity is their inability to understand how they view things differently, even after all their shared trauma.

Quackity and Tubbo went through Schlatt's administration together and in close quarters with Schlatt. They both left with similar, albeit not the same, trauma as a result. However, their experiences with Schlatt left them both with different outlooks on life. They approach things differently, want and desire other things in life, and, throughout the exile arc, constantly found themselves at odds in opinion. If you ever wanted a trope of friends to enemies through misunderstandings, much like Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr, Quackity and Tubbo are your guys.

They both struggle with the idea that the world is big enough for them, especially Quackity. There is a constant struggle between Quackity and Tubbo with who takes the lead and who is in charge. Now that they aren't forced on the same team, they've again found themselves at this impasse. But this time, neither is backing down because neither has to. They don't have to put aside their differences for the good of a country anymore. This time they are fighting for each their nation and ideals.

Tubbo often let Quackity persuade him with passionate speeches. But, this time, Tubbo is not allowing Quackity to have his way, whilst Quackity is not used to Tubbo digging his heels in the ground so much. Quackity does not want to settle for less; he's done that in the past, but he has missed the compromises being offered in refusing to let a little go. His paranoia that his happiness and all he's created will crumble away, much like past projects have toe lead him to view everyone as a threat. And it's funny how the very same fear from Tubbo, building those walls to protect his happiness, broke the last straw for Quackity, causing this argument to spiral and ball.

Both are in the wrong, and both are in the right. Still, personally, Quackity's refusal in this new life for total control, which influenced the negotiating, probably had a more significant impact than just giving Tubbo the natural border. Quackity makes it out like he doesn't want complete control, but he rejected it and presented arguments that left Tubbo worse off when offered an equal footing solution. Quackity is someone who wants to stay above Tubbo and therefore hold more of the control. Suppose he continues to maintain that stance in his mind while negotiating. In that case, he will never find a solution other than obliterating the competition because Tubbo will not stand for less than equal.

The fractures in Tubbo and Quackity's relationship came long before this altercation, but it seems as though this might be the thing to pull them apart finally. Of course, the only viable solution is for both parties to leave on equal footing, but Quackity struggles with that idea, and Tubbo won't settle for less.

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scandeniall · 3 years

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story of us

pairing: suna x reader

the story of ur relationship <3; alternatively (more) dating sunarin headcanons but this time is somewhat of an order and talks good and bad 2K+ worth lol

a/n: i had more planned but half of these have been sitting in my notes for months and its kinda fucking long already bc he lives rent free!!!

warnings: uh the usual aged up (in ur 20s time skip type beat), language, yeah

Meeting

Now when y’all met suna was not looking to love at all. That man was just living his life and so where you. The two of you pretty much meet through komori. You’re a friend and it’s his birthday so him and a few of his friends go out for drinks bc why not. Young hot pretty financially stable v-ball players. Nah no ones there for any type of hookups literally just there celebrating a great guy.

They rent out a section at a relatively nice bar tbh. Not the cheapest and you can actually hear conversation. But also not a super expensive one where the patrons are middle aged with jazz music and the occasional track to relive “youth.” Komori’s a sweetie and will come outside to get you when you text that you’re there. You’ve met washio and ofc sakusa Before so you greet them casually then you turn and there’s Suna and a few others you haven’t met.

That greeting isn’t anything special I promise. Just “hey I’m so and so” and vice versa. It’s one of those meetings where you just think “he’s cute” but it’s such a fleeting thought. Y’all don’t even really talk that first night tbh. At the next practice Suna mentions offhandedly that he didn’t know komori was dating someone and komori is like: huh? Yeah sorry. I love (Y/N) and all but were just friends. Suna just shrugs not really caring to be honest until Komori just asks what did he think of you.

“Don’t really remember much man. Seemed cool though” he didn’t think he’d really see you again. Yeah you were close enough to have been at Komori’s birthday but if that was his first time ever meeting you, he figured you weren’t from around there are present very much. Yeah he was wrong.

Suddenly you were on Komori’s snap story more often, or maybe he’d just been noticing more. Too bad he couldn’t even remember your name 💀. Then it turned into you occasionally popping up where he was. He’d been told your name at least 5 times already but wouldn’t remember it the next day. Whenever he’d see you again he’d get a strained look like: “what is this mf name again” just laugh and tell him again bby.

That changed at some random house party by another mutual friend you two apparently had? You two were the only people just around the fire pit trying to catch some warmth in the chilly night. He’s probably just on his phone head bobbing his head to the muffled music from inside. And you’re just like “remember my name yet?” All jokingly. This sparks the tiniest bit of interest in him and he lets out a low chuckle and just admits “not at all.” I also feel like this is the first time he really looks at you and he’s like 🤨, wait you’re actually kinda cute.

That night y’all just kinda talk and vibe. The conversation comes easy as you two jump back and forth from talking about the music playing to sneakers which he brings up to stuff that you like. He’s actually really easy to talk to. So easy that u can forget about him not remembering your name despite meeting several times. You mention that you’d hung around komori before while they were gaming and that he seemed pretty cool. That leads him to asking “how do you know him anyways?”

“I used to date Sakusa”

Mentally he’s just like— ‘yeah I’m not getting involved in this. Time to go.’ Until you just start laughing.

“I’m kidding. He’s not really my type. We met after being paired together for a project in school.”

The two of you spend quite a bit of time just talking that night until you are joined again by some friends and it’s deadass like y’all weren’t just talking for almost an hour straight.

Getting Together

The process of getting together is like a cat and mouse game. You two start getting closer than friends and then something happens and you’re not talking for weeks. Whether it be life just getting busy, and then someone ending up on some random tinder date or so be it. Definitely one of those things were somehow someway y’all end up just hanging on one of your couches watching a movie. At some point there’s definitely a hint of sexual tension but neither of y’all act on it (later on you find on his finsta that he used to post several “i wont you 😔” memes Folks can’t tell if hes joking or not (hes not))

You probably gotta tell that man you like him so if that ain’t you I’m sorry. Y’all not dating 😹. It’s something casual, y’all going to pick up some snacks for a movie night and why this mf keep looking at you out the side of his eyes instead of the road. You def texting the groupchat asking if you should confess. They tell you to boss up and just do it baby.

You literally end up confessing in that parking lot. Like right when he shuts the car off and starts swinging his keys on his finger and you kinda just blurt “I like you. Like like you.” He just kinda nods before his eyes widen. “Wait are you fr?” Like no you’re joking tf. It gets a lil awkward so you just go to get out the car and he’s like “I like like you too.”

I definitely don’t think either of you ever officially asked the other out it’s just at some point the understanding that you two are a couple. Like when you’re hanging out just you two hes more touchy, and then y’all start kissing and holding hands at some point. Then when you’re with friends he almost exclusively sits next to you and your friends notice the whispers in one another’s ears at the loud bar that seem just a hint too intimate for ppl who are just friends. Then y’all start arriving and leaving places together and people just at some point get the message (it’s later confirmed by you tweeting some shit like: I hate Rin why is that mf my boyfriend)

As far as anniversaries y’all draw straws to pick a day in the ballpark of the time y’all both think you became official. That’s the day you stick with even if it’s not true.

Relationship Flaws

A fault in the relationship is sunas kinda poor communication when it comes to things that matter. How he feels. Arguments. Love sure as hell don’t come east with anyone but when your partner won’t let you in? Yeah that’s like hell. That’s something you struggle with. And then on your end, it’s the impatience with him not letting you in. You try to wrongfully rush it.

There’s definitely been arguments that stem from him just being upset about something unrelated to the relationship then coming to you for comfort without actually telling you what’s wrong. He kinda just wants to lay with his head on his chest but at some point that’s not enough. Y’all are in a relationship and should be able to talk about your bad days too.

You’re not innocent in this issue either because sometimes it comes off too pushy. Yes it’s from a place of care but sometimes that silent comfort is necessary. The walls will break in due time and y’all both know that deep in the back of your minds But then there’s a part that’s like— yeah we can’t let this become the norm

“Rin, can you please talk to me”

He will have literally told you “whatever” and that he “can’t deal with this rn” several times as he just shrugs and is like yeah “I’m gonna just go home. I’ll text you later” with an awkward ass pat on your shoulder if it really ruined his mood. If he’s leaving before he gets super upset and uncomfortable just some half assed kiss in your cheek

Another thing is I feel like he could be passive aggressive and let’s be real other folks doing it causes you to do it to. Y’all probably drag eachother on your finstas where you can both see it lol

But when it comes to making up he cracks first and apologizes when he started it. Or as y’all get more comfy with communication. If it’s not anything major he’ll just hit you with a text like “I’m bored come hang”

More Relationship Things

I feel like he love/hates driving. Likes the ride not always driving though. So if you ever proposed a late night drive he’d be down (if you offer to drive). He does let y’all take his car though. He reclines the seat pretty far back. Alternates between just closing his eyes vibing w/ the music or kinda just looking at you (he the type of bf that makes u nervous no matter how long y’all been together)The way he looks at you makes you nervous cause that man is fine as hell and you can just feel his eyes on you.

He films you on Snapchat and sends the video to you like “you look hot”

If he’s not ‘resting his eyes’ he’s mumbling along to the music because he has the aux. if y’all music tastes are different he occasionally throws in something you really like bc he likes how you perk up at one of your fav songs

Moving on. Y’all dap eachother up after s3x because it’s “modern romance” (boy stfu). You two came up with a sex playlist together and it’s on both of your phones. Sometimes one of you will add a troll song that the other doesn’t know and put it in the lineup. (Stole my heart by 1D has definitely played before and you were practically in tears laughing at his reaction. That was one of those songs he was like ‘yeah alright i think we’re done).

At some point you two develop your own handshake and it’s cute. Whenever either of you have to travel without the other that’s always the last thing you do before you leave eachother. There’s vids of your friends daring y’all to do your elaborate ass handshake drunk and doesn’t matter what’s in your system, you both know it like the back of your hand.

I think he values quality time a lot so there’s so many nights where you’re both just chilling in his room just doing your own things. He could just be at his desk watching some game highlights and you’re just doing hw on his bed with your own earbuds in work all spread out and he’s content. He’s also attentive so if he calculates that you’ve been working too long he’ll just take ur earbud like “hey let’s go get something to eat.”

People definitely think he’s the lazy one in the relationship but it’s 100% not true. Like stated above, he’s very attentive and can pretty much gauge how you’re feeling in the blink of an eye. He knows when you need alone time but won’t go without reassuring you that he’s here whenever you’re ready. When you do just need him he’s there without a second thought. If you’re more touchy he’ll have your head in his lap his arm running up and down your as you tell him what’s wrong. He knows when to joke about a minor inconvenience and over the course of your relationship knows when to cut the jokes and be serious with you.

He’d never admit it but he knows your coffee order by heart (he keeps up his image my asking wtf do you get everytime. Just let him LOL). He the type to peek at what you plan on wearing and ‘accidentally’ color coordinate then pull some shit like “why are you copying me”

Y’all def shit talk together. See someone doing something completely out of pocket in public— straight to ur phones you go (pack it up shade room). To the public it just looks like you aren’t paying any attention to one another on your dates but y’all are. Just over the phone so u don’t piss off ur target 😌

Y’all are very comfy in your relationship that you just say stuff. Y’all don’t even think.

“Rin, what if i crashed us in this car rn 😹”

“Do it. Might be fun”

When you two finally move in together it’s almost like how your relationship starts. Slowly more and more spares of stuff for you end up at his. He does sorta make the move near the end of your lease and is just like “you’re here more than me anyways.” (hes nervous but swears he’s not. Bby you’re literally shaking). Him moving you in is like hell. This mf takes sooooo long to help with boxes. Picks up 1 then sits for like 15 minutes. You ask for help the first few times and he’s just like “I got you” while continuing to scroll his phone.

Sleepy Shoulder kisses in the mornings. Only form a greeting you get but it’s ok

this is like my 100th dating suna hc and im still going this is SICK. it was so hard to not drop old refs bc i still believe in them 100% yes i do!!!!

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #suna rintaro x reader #suna x reader #haikyuu imagine #suna imagines #hq imagines #haikyuu headcanons

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theyre-just-blocks · 3 years

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Let’s talk about Big Q, shall we?

As always, I’ve got stuff to say about Quackity (the character). And after today’s streams, I’ve got a few things to say/point out. I did not stay up to write this 2,343 word character analysis, no I did not.

Right off the bat I noticed how uncharastically quiet Big Q was during the whole thing. He wasn’t streaming it today either (yeah, he streamed later, but still) and I just thought that it was interesting. He had his moments where he was himself (cursing, being loud, taking off his clothes) but there were moments where he was just,, uncharastically quiet.

On top of that, these quiet moments were spent staring at Ranboo. At least, his character was positioned so that it was looking directly at him and it’s rather unnerving, especially with that smiley face skin. Then when Dream reveals Ranboo to be a “traitor” Quackity even said, “I fucking knew it”, so something tells me that he’s been suspecting Ranboo for sometime now.

When they were at the festival too, he was acting odd. On top of staring at Ranboo from time to time, he approached Ranboo about him wearing armor in L’Manburg. Of course, wearing armor in L’Manburg isn’t permitted, but it was raining and Ranboo is half enderman. Quackity seemed to really be angry with Ranboo for breaking that law, albeit he was hiding most of his anger, but I’m sure that Ranboo has worn armor before within the walls of L’Manburg. So why all of a sudden? Why call it out? Then when he asked Tubbo about it and Tubbo said that they could make the exception, Quackity responded with “Alright, whatever you say Mr. President '' in the most passive aggressive voice that even I felt attacked.

On top of that little moment, Quackity excused himself from a Festival game to “go get something”. Granted he didn’t seem to take that long (I didn’t really get a number) but while he was gone he was whispering to Tubbo about when Dream was coming. But I just thought it was weird that he just disappeared like that. When he came back, of course, he didn’t have anything. Not even Tubbo knew what he was doing. But no one seemed to question it at all afterwards.

Let’s also talk about how nervous Big Q seemed about the Dream confrontation. He was clearly worried that Dream might not show. He was nervous, he admitted that he was. When he went up against Techno, someone he’s feared for a while now, he wasn’t nervous. He was confident. He even PVPed him, but all of a sudden with Dream he’s nervous? We’ve seen him stand up to Dream before (Mexican L’Manburg) so why would he be worried about whether Dream shows or not?

And of course, we can’t forget to mention his skin changes. I thought I was seeing things when Quackity’s profile in the list of members on the smp showed up as a frowny face. I thought that was just some kind of glitch or something because it would go back to normal a few seconds later. And I noticed that there seemed to be something wrong with his face. When he would turn, it seemed like his face wasn’t connected. And wouldn’t you know, I wasn’t seeing things. Several times today in the ruined Community House, Quackity had the unnerving frown (and a bald head) and when he was talking to Tubbo about Ranboo, he kept turning and it was very clear that the smiley face is a mask and the true face of Quackity is a frown.

Speaking of his discussion with Tubbo about Ranboo, let’s talk about that whole ordeal, yeah? When I thought they had dropped it, moved past the need to talk about Ranboo’s book and involvement with Techno and Tommy, Big Q drops the bomb by demanding that they execute them. Thank god Tubbo was able to talk some sense into him (PTSD will do that to you), but it was still yet another account of Big Q wanting to see some bloodshed. And he was awfully persistent about it, to the point where it was concerning.

And going back on what I said in a previous post about Big Q always wanting power, right from the elections, I got my confirmation about it in Tubbo’s stream today at an hour and thirty three minutes.

“Tubbo, listen to me. What you need is order, Tubbo. The fucking issue is that there’s no order in L’Manburg. Nothing that’s been happening up to this point has been order... I want what’s best for the country. That’s what I’ve wanted since the very beginning, Tubbo. If not then I wouldn’t have ran! I want to be President Tubbo, I want to do something good”

Whether it’s an obsession with power, a need to maintain order, following governmental ideals, or an actual want to do some good, you can’t deny that Quackity’s character has always wanted power, an opportunity to prove himself. And maybe because L’Manburg keeps failing him, keeps failing to give him those right opportunities to do so, that’s why he leaves. He’s frustrated with the country, so he just...leaves.

And if Quackity’s Greek parallel is indeed Icarus (I think Techno mentioned it once in a stream) then power would be his hubris, his downfall. His want for power and need for order are going to be the sun that’s going to melt his wings. If he is working with Dream to get power, isn’t that the LITERAL definition of “flying too close to the sun”?

Also, this is a little unrelated. But in Bastille’s song “Icarus” there’s a line that goes, “You put up your defenses when you leave. You leave because you’re certain of who you want to be,” and I just think that’s very fitting for Quackity in terms of what just happened.

There was a lot that happened with Big Q’s character today, and seeing as he’s my favorite on the SMP (aside from Sam of course) I was thrilled with today’s streams. But in terms of where these new developments might lead, I’m a little worried. So yeah, I’ve got theories.

We discussed this in the Awesamdude discord, but the possibility of Quackity being a suspect for the destruction of the Community House came up. Here are a few reasons why he is one of the prime suspects (the other being Dream):

Quackity left during the Festival to “go get something” and this could’ve been the perfect chance for him to go and grief the Community House.

Though we know that Dream hates Quackity and Quackity hates Dream, it’s possible that they’ve made a deal. Dream could’ve promised Quackity the power he’s wanted since day one. Whether that be in guaranteeing that El Rapids can remain a country, or after Dream destroys L’Manburg, Quackity can come out on the top. He can have what remains. It would be an easy way out for Quackity after being dismissed time after time again and denied the chance to prove himself and build the ideal government.

That could explain why he was worried about Dream showing up or not. He wasn’t worried about the deal Dream made to Tubbo (showing up without armor), it was more so the deal Dream made with Quackity and getting the power that Dream promised.

Not to mention, it also benefits Dream as well. By getting Quackity on his side by using power as leverage, he’s able to eliminate one of the few threats to him on the SMP. True, I’m sure he’ll betray him in the end/use him, but right now he needs to focus on Tommy and the discs. He needs to get Quackity out of the way, so by siding with him and making a deal, it makes things easier for Dream.

And if Quackity is possessed by Schlatt, Dream was an old ally to Schlatt, so if Schlatt took control during the deal, then it would make sense why it was made.

It’s possible and very likely that this isn’t the case though. They really do seem to hate each other and Quackity is very adamant about killing Dream. But maybe it’s all just an act? Maybe it’s just all a plot to ease sus off of Quackity.

But why and how could Quackity leave his friends like that so easily? Oh boy, lemme tell you..

I will never let go of possession Quackity/Reviving Schlatt AU.

If Quackity is possessed then it would make sense why he’s able to let go of his friends so easily. Schlatt might be manipulating him behind the scenes and thus cause Quackity to lose trust in his friends. Schlatt felt betrayed by everyone (as he should) and might be telling Quackity that the same will happen to him. Quackity even admitted to not trusting Ranboo from the start, and that could be a result of eating Schlatt’s heart and having his influence on him.

Let’s also not forget how ready Quackity was to kill Ranboo. He wanted an execution. He kept repeating “traitor” like a broken record. Tubbo even pointed out the parallel to Quackity that he was doing EXACTLY what Schlatt did to Tubbo at the festival. Quackity himself even said that he was LIVID about Ranboo being a traitor. And even after Tubbo tried to talk sense into him how Ranboo wasn’t a traitor, he just has short term memory, Quackity still referred to himself as such.

It would make sense that Quackity would hate traitors. In terms of his character, he was betrayed by Schlatt. Someone who he thought would love him and help him rule Manburg in a way that would help everyone, his ideal government. But of course, Schlatt was shit and didn’t fulfill those expectations. And then when things did get better, his country betrayed him. Tubbo betrayed him. When Quackity agreed to stand up against Dream and not exile Tommy, Tubbo agreed with him. Then he went against that plan. And L’Manburg didn’t meet up to his expectations. It never did and he never got the power he wanted.

And if Quackity is possessed by Schlatt, that could also explain his whole bit about going on and on about killing the traitor. When Schlatt found Tubbo to be the traitor, we know what happened. He had him executed. That whole scene leading up to his death, he kept saying how everyone left him. When he needed them most, everyone left. He felt betrayed by them, so it makes sense that after finding out that there’s ANOTHER traitor in the cabinet, he’s going to get angry about it. He doesn’t want it happening again.

And with Wilbur’s comment about Schlatt being a lawful evil. He’s going to keep order no matter what it takes. If you’re a traitor, you’re going to get what’s coming to you, so it would make sense that he’d want Ranboo dead as well. And even if that’s not the case, the description of wanting order no matter what fits Quackity’s current character right now.

Now let me add in Dad Schlatt because I have daddy issues.

I like to think that if Quackity is possessed by Schlatt or something, his whole speech to Tubbo before saying he was out and leaving was just Schlatt trying to communicate to his son. He was angry that Ranboo would betray his cabinet and maybe because he wants to be a better dad or something, he wants to make sure the thing that happened to him doesn’t happen to Tubbo. He tells him not to trust anyone, even Quackity (it could be him warning that Quackity and Dream are working together) and that he can’t let people walk all over him. He’s trying to give him advice, trying to guide him to be a better president.

If he wasn’t able to help Tubbo at all when he was alive, maybe this was the one chance that he got to do so.

But more likely, that was just Quackity trying to give Tubbo some last advice before leaving.

Now, maybe he left only to return with a revived Schlatt? Only to watch Doomsday from the sidelines? What is he planning?

And what was up with the frown? I don’t think I’ve seen him keep it on for as long as he did in the past. I had thought that it might’ve been a result of eating Schlatt’s heart, but that wasn’t the case. I went back to look at old videos and sure enough, the frown was underneath the smile. I don’t know if this is something that’s always been there, or if it appeared after a certain event (election maybe?) but I want to know WHY he has it.

Is it just for memes? Is it supposed to symbolize the fact that he puts on this literal mask to appear to be the “funny guy” when that’s not the case?

Or, or, if we’re going off shape-shifter Quackity, what if that’s one of the traits? That magical part of him (being a shapeshifter) could also maybe allude to his personality. He’s going to change to make sure he fits in. If he’s got to act a certain way to get where he needs to be, he’s going to do it. He’s going to change in order to ensure that happens. If Dream says to join him and get power in return, then maybe he’s going to say yes.

And let’s not even talk about the fact how he basically has the same smiley mask as Dream and his real one is the opposite.

Whatever it is though, it caught me off guard today, but it makes for some killer fanart and headcanons, so I loved it (though I was uncomfortable when it happened).

I was going to wait and see how the events played out tomorrow and then talk, but this obviously was already a lot, so it be easier to make predictions now and whatnot and then see what happens tomorrow.

With that being said, I am, scared.

#dream smp #dsmp #dream smp spoilers #dsmp spoilers #quackity #big q #character analysis #oh man i'm so tired #this is all i thought about today #that might be concerning #but whatever #i put more effort into this than homework haha

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rpbetter · 3 years

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I'm so tired of roleplaying with people who don't put half the commitment I do into our threads and muses. I'm so tired of feeling like I'm a weirdo or like I don't belong for that. Any other hobby and people wouldn't care if I took it seriously. Why is roleplaying different? How can I keep going like this if I'm getting rudeness from all sides? I can't even go outside my already tiny bubble and find more partners, because I always see people putting roleplayers like me down and it's exhausting.

"Why is roleplaying different?"

Well, Anon, I know that was a rhetorical question, but I have some thoughts on that. To the surprise of no one!

I strongly believe that this is an issue with how fandom has come to dominate roleplaying. As I've said before, it really wasn't always like that. Of course, you always had canon characters and almost all RPers were invested in a fandom or two. The difference was that online RP was once viewed much more like tabletop RPGs are.

When the RPC became a near-total offshoot of Fandom, a lot of shit changed and very rapidly...and within Fandom, a lot of shit was changing very rapidly as well at that time.

RP has always been something looked down on (though, at least no one ever accused written RP online of being literally demonic like they did DnD, or made correlations to murder sprees like they did LARPing, so there's that) as strange, not the good, understandable sort of dorky.

Part of that is almost certainly because of the difference in the way society views writing vs the way it views hobbies like gaming - writing is seen as an intellectual pursuit and a job, gaming, even at its most negative points of view in wider society, has been seen traditionally as a downtime activity only.

But. RP was not looked down upon from within Fandom or in roleplay communities themselves like it is now.

When the whole experience of fandoms themselves became extremely mainstream and open, it welcomed in a ton of shit ideas and behaviors that were not previously prevalent. It changed RP, too, along many of those same lines.

When your hobby is considered objectionably weird by people within the fandoms you love and RP in and that makes you a sort of lowest-tier fan, the viewpoint of RP to RPers becomes something lesser than a valid hobby. When RPers are the same people who engage with Fandom monetarily, anything not monetized is passively consumable content, including RP. And RPers are trying to both deflect shame and struggling with wider society's mixed messages, that now hit them everywhere online as well. Shit like, "you don't have to monetize your hobby, it's okay to just make really good cross stitches of memes for yourself" and "if you're not paying me, you have no control over me."

We seriously do not view RP as a proper hobby anymore, that's why. There are many factors to that, those are just few, but that's the ultimate answer. It's not seen that way because it's not valued in the same way.

I think much of the problem with muns losing their entire shit over anyone else approaching the hobby differently, dare I say...more seriously, is related to a lot of complex psychology about self-esteem, control, and anxiety. So many people here struggle with serious self-worth and confidence issues, and I think to many of them, whether they realize it or not, when they see serious RPers, they feel like that's an inherent judgment and a danger to their own enjoyment. Because RP, as writing, is a skilled hobby - the more you practice it, the more skilled you become with it. Meaning that someone who approaches the writing seriously is going to be at a higher skill level.

Enter the way we're training to think about writing again - when they see someone who is very practiced, skilled, and confident with their writing, the learned idea is that they're somehow superior in a nasty, personal way.

I most certainly do not think that makes it alright, it isn't, and I'm not very tolerant of it.

It's absolutely alright to engage with RP in any way you see fit. If that's extremely casual, it's a minor hobby for you, that's great! I'm so happy you're enjoying yourself, and I mean that in no facetious way. But not when that is the only form of it respected and accepted. It's just as alright to have RP as your primary, serious hobby!

The only way we can all enjoy a hobby with such great variance within it is by respecting each other's variables, not by vilifying them. It's recognizing that, no matter how much you enjoy the mun and/or muse, they're not engaging with the hobby in the way you are, it's not a good fit to write together. (Please, begging y'all to be friends with those who are different, not enemies, shit's sake. You've not got to write together to be friends!) Instead of labeling them and being hateful. Different =/= a threat.

And, to go off a bit lol y'all demonizing serious RPers really don't get that there are some intense tones of ableism and more going on in that narrative of yours, huh?

Not that anyone requires a reason to be serious about any hobby, but when people pick a hobby like RP as their primary one...you should probably have the maturity to consider why that is. Could it be that they focus on a hobby they can do from their homes and that requires low physical involvement, and has a degree of separation from direct socializing, for a reason?

Serious RPers tend to be limited in their ability to pursue other hobbies. Mental and physical health, region, finances, and ability to spend time outside of the home are all very common limits for those who "take RP too seriously/are addicted to RP."

Maybe take five seconds away from your own issues to consider that the person you're shitting on for something so minor as a difference of importance of a hobby might be the full-time caretaker of a special needs child, having to remain home and on a very small income. They might be chronically ill or suffer from agoraphobia. They might live in an area with no hobbies of interest, affordability, or at all...or they might live somewhere that is incredibly dangerous for them.

I honestly do not know where these people have been that they've been aggressed at by serious RPers, but that's usually the excuse. (I'm not saying it has never happened or does not happen, before anyone goes there.) The idea that serious RPers are extreme elitists who are demanding that other muns do what they do, how they do it. That they expect other muns to be online and RPing all the time, that they be "available for entertainment at all times" at the cost of real-life matters. Having the expectation that threads not be dropped constantly or that a writing partner not leave for months with no contact is neither of those things.

In over two decades of RPing across almost every platform type that has existed, I have literally never seen that be either a singular RPer-type problem or one that serious RPers are even more likely to deal in. I've seen the opposite, actually. Which is not a condemnation or a statement that all casual RPers do this, just what my experience has been. And one that actually stands to reason based on the way they view and engage with RP - quick replies, quick entertainment, and very low commitment to threads, muses, or other muns. Of course, it's annoying to them when a more serious RPer is unwilling to do rapid-fire style quick, short threads from an ask with them, but is writing the lengthy replies they already owed instead.

That's probably a factor as well, in here among a plethora of misunderstanding/unawareness of differences - for many serious RPers, it's not easier and more fun to write short, quick threads. So, what a casual RPer is seeing is that they're willing to put all this extraordinary effort into a massive reply to someone else while their easy, fun, quickly done thread is waiting in line.

Misunderstandings and unawareness breed hostility, period. And there is a hell of a lot of those things in the RPC.

What serious RPers are expressing are either boundaries/expectations or frustration. Not a demand that you be around all the time, but an expectation that you leave them alone if you're not also a serious RPer who will be committed to threads and muses. Not hostility and elitism, the frustration that it's already difficult to find muns who will work out before you add in the majority rule of casual RPers.

It's incredibly disheartening, frustrating, and honestly, a bit anxiety-inducing to constantly be the weird one, always have few choices, and to be at risk of being Problematic purely because you take the hobby seriously. You can't vent without someone jumping on your ass to remind you (even if you said numerous times that "real life comes first" and "people can do what they want") that omg, people have lives, people can do what makes them happy, it's just RP.

It's so upsetting when you think you might have found a good writing partner, then, you see a PSA they've reblogged about how it's a "hobby, not a jobby," and "no one owes anyone anything, ever." Excuse me, as that last one is a direct quote, let me redo it so it is verbatim: "no one owes anyone here anything - EVER !!!"

I said I wasn't very tolerant :)

But seriously, exactly what you've expressed is why I'm not...it's another form of controlling others instead of trying your best to control your own experience, and it's often extremely hateful. I'm not tolerant of anything like that, it's no longer supporting preferences at that point. When your preference is the only one that will be tolerated in the community, it's not a preference anymore.

It's something that makes others feel isolated, afraid of harassment, and depressed. It is a hobby and it isn't supposed to make you feel like that!

And, no, absolutely the fuck not lol the "answer" to this isn't that you're taking it too seriously and need to take a break. I'm so tired of seeing that shit tacked onto RPH responses and vents and PSAs. You're not saying that RP is making you feel this way, "just take a break and come back when you agree with everyone else" isn't a solution.

Of course, if you do feel like your time here has become so upsetting? Yeah, obviously, you should try to find some other things to supplement your downtime that make you feel happier again. Engage in some other forms of writing just meant for yourself, or that can be published as fics. Spend some more time on a game you enjoy for a while, or get invested in a new one. Learn to shape bonsai or make no-knead rolls. Whatever would make you happy as a hobby when you're not here.

Other than that, however, well...we're not going to be implying on this blog that you're too serious and need to take a hiatus until you have no emotional investment in your hobby. That's insane. I'd not say it about hiking, martial arts, dog obedience competitions, hobby farming, or painting either.

I wish I could think of some solutions as to where you could look that wasn't like this, but it's definitely the majority of the RPC. It doesn't help that, due to this, serious RPers have a tendency to quietly stick together and not venture out into the RPC. They're just not incredibly easy to find.

I will say that they tend to be:

novella - if you're not here for serious RP and sticking around for a while, you're not going to invest the time and energy into particularly lengthy writing

older RPers - I would say that twenty-five is probably the youngest, with early thirties to late forties being the majority

in fandoms with a large adult base of fans - even if it's a franchise friendly to, or even meant for, younger fans, if it has a particularly active adult fanbase, it's a better chance of finding serious RPers in it

as above, old fandoms - fandoms that have been around for a long time tend to have more serious RPers in them

fandomless OCs - tend to have a higher chance of being written by serious RPers than canons or heavily fandom-involved OCs

RPers who do not do a ton of advertising for their muse(s), but when they do, they don't advertise them based on activism points or trends

slightly more likely to not have an emphasis on highly aesthetic blogs, graphics, icons etc. - they use a modified basic tumblr theme, low on graphics, their aesthetics are not on-trend, for example

anti-content policing/"write what you want" style muns

muns with more extensive rules pages - they plan to be here for a while, they take writing, RP, and their muse(s) seriously, so, it's a bit more important to them to head off problems before they start

those with older characters/FCs - be that literally in age or the character being one that has existed for a long time

"stay in your lane" style muns - if they're opining on fandom or the RPC, they must really be angry about something

those with numerous and detailed headcanons - for example, their response to a HC meme ask like, "what's your muse's favorite ice cream flavor?" is going to be treated seriously, not simply answered with "mint chocolate chip because my bby is gross"

As usual, not a complete or perfect list. I don't fit some of the things on there! It could give you some things to look for when trying to find other serious RPers, though. It's based on observances from someone who was never a casual RPer, even as a minor (me, obviously), and maybe it could at least keep you from continuously running into hostility about your approach to RP.

I've honestly considered making a list of some sort expressly for RPers who are on the more serious end of the spectrum, but...in a RPC back when things were dominated by serious RPers, I did that sort of thing with a RPH I had, and it still got labeled as being a list for and by Elitists. I don't know that anyone would want to put themselves out there for potential harassment on tumblr, you know? It was a joke then, just having a group of RPers label you as an Elitist. Here, you get told to kill yourself, and none of us need more of that shit, right?

Try to hang in there, Anon, I know it's upsetting, and I'm so sorry that something fun has gotten to be like this.

Try to understand that these people are coming from a place of irrational defensiveness, often in response to bullying themselves at some point or feeling bad about themselves. That doesn't make it right, but it does make it easier to not take to heart.

And keep at it! In my experience here, once you find a group of people you fit into, it really is...A Group. Especially among RPers who are ostracized, they stick together, they promote each other, and they're very happy for their mutuals to become your mutuals. Once you find them, it unlocks so many opportunities for the interactions and type of RP you've been missing!

#answered #anonymous #serious rpers #rp problems #rp advice

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inkdemonapologist · 3 years

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Say in an au where Sammy and Henry did get together and start dating, what would their relationship be like? I feel Sammy would view Henry as sort of similar to Jack in a way; because I see Henry being able to keep Sammy calm like Jack. Henry also has a similar upbeat, laid-back and supportive personality like Jack.

I think we have pretty different headcanons about these three, haha! In my interpretation:

I don’t think Jack is someone who keeps Sammy calm.

Like, having a positive relationship in his life makes Sammy a more tolerable person, but that could be anyone -- Jack’s just a person Sammy gets along with well and doesn’t find aggravating. I see Sammy as someone who can be awkward/rude about communicating his needs and preferences to people (because they seem obvious to him and also he is not a very self-aware person), and Jack is a person who easily rolls with and accepts those sorts of idiosyncrasies quite genuinely. Sammy isn’t being calmed by Jack -- he’s just, actually comfortable interacting with him. For all that their affection is mostly unspoken, I think they can be quite direct with each other because of their level of mutual trust and respect.

Sammy is a loud and dramatic person with a lot of big feelings, and I can’t imagine Jack wanting to defuse or diminish that about him. I think he’d be more likely to retreat during times when Sammy is Too Much for him, and Jack needing space and quiet is something Sammy 100% understands.

I don’t think Henry would be like Jack (and Sammy wouldn’t see him that way)

I’ve talked about this one a little bit before, but while I definitely have them both down as being VERY CLEARLY Type 9s in the enneagram personality system (idk how many enneagram enthusiasts are in the batim fandom, but while we’re here, Joey’s a 3 and Sammy’s a 6, I will die on this hill), they’re pretty different 9s. Jack has a lot of the Type 9 optimism and doesn’t seem to be passive aggressive in his audio logs -- rather, he’s genuinely not that bothered by the nonsense he’s dealing with. Henry also tends to roll with whatever hand he’s dealt, and he and Jack both tend to see the best in people, but unlike Jack, Henry’s resentment and frustration are much more obvious in his audio log. (And if you believe Henry is responsible for the gold text, he Certainly Has Some Opinions about the prophet and the twisted angel, even though he never says so). Henry gets angry, he just suppresses it and soldiers on. I personally headcanon Henry’s strength is forgiveness - he does get angry, but he lets go of his anger quickly once things are better; which is why he’s able to wish Joey well after he leaves when nobody would blame him for holding a grudge. Jack is more detached and more likely to ghost when he doesn’t know how to help; Henry is more invested in fixing things if he can.

So what would a hypothetical relationship be like between Sammy and Henry?

My big thing whenever I ponder this ship is that, I think Henry would be good for Sammy, but I don’t actually think Sammy would be good for Henry. Henry’s got that kind of chill, capybara-like aura where people are inexplicably drawn to him even though he’s not got a lot of visible charisma, so it’s not hard to imagine Sammy catching feelings for this guy, and really appreciating the sense of acceptance that comes from being loved by Henry. And Henry is not afraid to go for what he wants, so I think if he liked Sammy back, he’d be willing to give it a try even if Sammy was nervous about Joey’s Obvious Big Crush. Actually, that’s another thing I think would be good for Sammy -- Henry values his own happiness enough to strive for it and take risks for the things he wants (see: starting JDS, leaving JDS), while I don’t… think Sammy values his own happiness much at all? He’s focused on Competence and Survival, and having someone encourage him to consider what he like… wants, might be kind of game-changing for him. With Henry in his corner, he might even leave JDS before things got really bad -- especially since I’m sure Joey’s treatment of him would Suddenly Change if he found out the two were dating.

But while Sammy is attractive and loyal and self-sacrificing and brilliantly creative and actually willing to pick up his half of the work, he is also… not good at managing his own emotions or communicating about them, ever. Henry has his own tendency to repress every negative emotion so that he can soldier on, but Sammy’s strategy of “complain loudly about things without taking any steps to fix them” is not much of an improvement; it’s easy to imagine Henry quietly absorbing all of Sammy’s stress while also feeling like he has no outlet for his own. And then his tendency to keep his resentment to himself could also be frustrating for Sammy, who is not exactly great at reading other people’s emotions and will either completely miss it, or get hypersensitive to hints of disapproval, and could end up lashing out about an issue that isn’t even there.

These aren’t deal-breakers, perse, but it’s easy for me to imagine stress quietly growing until Henry breaks it off (because Sammy never will). In the end, it might be the kind of relationship that never stops hurting a bit afterwards, because it made such a big difference and changed them both so much. They became different people together, they’re tied into each others’ history, but it wasn’t enough to make it work.

#i know you have questions you always do #we all write on the walls #henry x sammy #i'd say there was magic there

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jimlingss · 4 years

Text

Sugar and Coffee [4]

Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 4.5 OR Chapter 5

➜ Words: 4k

➜ Genres: 99.5% Fluff, 0.5% Angst, Pâtisserie school!AU

➜ Summary: It isn't hard to be a pâtisserie chef, but it's not a piece of cake either. It seems like for you in particular, life keeps throwing in one wrench after another. It always finds ways to make your sweets bitter. The cherry on top is Jeon Jungkook — a rival with a sensitive sweet tooth who always finds ways to complain about you.

cr.

You miss Seokjin. You know that you shouldn’t, but in the middle of the night while you’re unable to sleep, you pick up your phone again. And you send him a text. 2:03 am. Y/N: hey The bright screen stares back at you, illuminating your face and blinding your vision in the darkness of your quiet dorm room. Your messages are lined up in a row, the same exact text left unanswered. Ones you sent from a week ago to two days ago. The radio silence makes the realization sink in — he broke it off. Jin really has no plans of communicating with you again, of giving you an explanation other than telling you that it’s run its course and that you’re not the one at fault. It doesn’t sit well with you, so your thumb moves, quicker than you can list the consequences for. You call his number. It dials. But instead of hearing the tone ring, you hear an automated message. Seokjin changed his number. // It’s morning while on the way to class with you hiding beneath the hood of Jin’s sweater that you end up catching sight of someone familiar walking towards your direction. It’s your only strand of hope, but you step forward before the opportunity is lost. “Hani?” “Y/N?” Hani stops and greets you with a smile. She’s a friend — well, Seokjin’s friend. But she still regards you with the same warmth as she gave to you for the past two years, albeit the atmosphere is awkward. The both of you know what happened, know it’s looming over your heads. But no one speaks about it, no one dares to broach the subject. “Hey, how are you?” And her question is asked at a higher pitch, cautious as if you were a wounded animal that she was afraid of scaring. “I’m...fine, how are you?” “I’m okay.” Hani nods and gathers the courage to approach the issue that you’re skirting around. “I...heard about what happened. It’s a real shame. I hope you’re holding up well.” “Trying.” You muster a smile, shrugging your shoulders. Yet in spite of her friendliness, you can still feel it — the distance. Like you thought, they sided with him. They’ve chosen him with no plans of getting between you two and involving themselves in the conflict. “Well, I should go. I might be late. I’ll see you around, Y/N.” You nod and she brushes past you. But then you twist on your heel. “Hani?” “Yeah?” She spins around. “Did,” you hesitate, “Jin say anything about me?” “No, he didn’t,” she says, quietly and sadly. You bob your head again, meeting her eye. “How is he?” “He’s okay.” You wonder what that means — if he never really cared, if he’s already over this. But you’re also glad that he’s okay. You’ll never have any ill wishes against Jin. You still love him.

Jungkook and his friends have a system, if one could call it that — a shitty system of crashing each other’s dorms. Sometimes they’re crowding around Taehyung’s gaming consoles, other times it’s Jimin’s computer. Or Jungkook’s flat screen that he spent his entire summer job’s savings for. Or even going to Hoseok and Yoongi’s apartment to raid the fridge and be as loud as they want without getting noise complaints. Hoseok and Yoongi didn’t like the dorm life, so they were willing to raise their living expenses and pool their money together for an apartment off campus. And that’s where Jungkook finds himself this evening. They’re watching a soccer game, but the only person invested is Taehyung who actually knows the teams and who is who. Hoseok is preoccupied pigging out on the snacks, Yoongi sipping his drink, and Jimin is playing a game on his phone. “Can I ask you something?” Jungkook asks out of the blue, smacking his lips after taking a swig of the beer. He can’t wait till Taehyung gets curious and drinks some — he’d probably gag from the taste. Yoongi looks up. “What?” “It’s not about me, but I have a friend of a friend and this friend of theirs was...dumped pretty badly and now they’re depressed and not talking...at all….and they don’t really have friends anymore because all their friends were my friend’s friends, so it really sucks for them.” “Uh-huh.” “So what would you hypothetically say to my friend’s friend to make them feel better or like what would you do?” “Well, for one, I’d take Y/N out,” Hoseok pipes up while chuckling. Jimin lifts his head and Taehyung looks over. The two of them exchange expressions and burst out laughing. Jungkook sighs in irritation. “Who said this was about Y/N?!” “We’re not total idiots, dude.” Jimin grins. “Sometimes.” In the meanwhile, Taehyung leans down to give a punch to Jungkook’s arm and winks. “Trying to slide into her DMs now that she’s single, huh? I see you, Kook. Still got game. Can’t say I’m not impressed. Go get that puss—” “As if.” Jungkook scoffs. “I just feel bad, alright? Forget I asked. Whatever.” But Yoongi isn’t ready to drop the subject quite yet. His cat-like eyes narrow in on him as he sips on his drink. He puts the bottle down on the coffee table with a clank. “Since when did you start caring about her?” “I don’t—” “You don’t have to get defensive,” Yoongi deadpans boredly. He isn’t that interested, merely stating a fact. “I’m just surprised.” “She’s going to be my internship partner whether I like it or not in a few months.” The youngest sighs. “I don’t want to make it awkward. And I thought it would be better in the long run if we become friends now. It would be nice to have each other’s backs. Or at least be civil enough where she’s not trying to rip my head off every other second.” Yoongi appears mildly understanding and nods. “So it’s a diplomatic thing.” “Yeah.” “Invite her to our game night,” Hoseok says from the kitchen. “Don’t do that.” Yoongi scoffs, expression wrinkled like he bit into a lemon. “It’s our thing.” “Are we ten? Boys only?” Hoseok argues, “We already have our thing every single night anyway. Plus, it might be a nice change since Jungkook always wins.” “Fine.” He rolls his eyes. “Do whatever you want.” “That actually sounds kind of fun!” Taehyung grins, tearing his eyes away from the soccer game. Jungkook’s amazed that he had half a mind to pay attention to the conversation. “But I wonder if Y/N is any good at board games or if she even plays.” “Is everyone cool with me asking?” Jungkook looks around — Hoseok and Taehyung are enthusiastic about the prospect while Yoongi is passive aggressive at worst and apathetic at best. It’s Jimin who looks uncertain. “She’s….intimidating,” he mutters. “But….I think you’re right. Y/N looks like she’s having a tough time and if we can help, then we should. At least then we know we tried.” He nods. There’s only one issue left. “I don’t even know if she’ll even accept…” Knowing you, you might just laugh in his face and then spit at him for even making such a suggestion. Then again, with how you’ve been acting lately, you might just start crying from gratefulness and freak him out. Both scenarios are equally horrible.

The pair of you bake alongside each other as the teacher watches for technique and the order of the procedures done. Jungkook works on the dough while you focus on the custard filling. It’s surprisingly perfect teamwork — you’re in sync with one another and assemble the final cake together. And when the teacher returns to eat it, he’s astounded that it’s been exactly replicated. From the taste to the presentation. You leave the room with a ninety percent grade, having absolutely aced the midterm. “That was pretty good, huh?!” Jungkook grins, putting his hand out. You muster a small smile, and high-five him back. “Yeah.” “Man, all our hard work paid off! Did you see the look on Mr. Chu’s face?” He was over the moon, especially considering that napoleon cake isn’t all that easy to make under strict time constraints. But when Jungkook glances at you, you don’t seem very happy over it. Your eyes are on the floor with your downcast head. “Hey.” The doe-eyed boy pokes your shoulder until you look up at him. “Do you wanna…” “Pardon?” Your brows furrow. His voice became so quiet, you couldn’t hear him. Jungkook clears his throat noisily. “I asked how you were holding up?” You shrug. “Fine. I don’t know. Do you really want to hear about it?” You doubt he would trouble himself with your problem, but what catches you off guard is that he stops in the middle of the hallway and nods. You stop with him too. “Sure. Shoot.” “Really?” “Yeah, I don’t see why not. It’s not like I have anything better to do.” You inhale a deep breath. It catches in your throat. Your fist tightens, nails digging into your skin. You swear you wouldn’t cry again. “I texted Jin, even though I know it wasn’t a good idea and yeah, it wasn’t. He changed his number.” “Oh….shit.” “And I talked to one of his friends yesterday and she said he’s doing fine. He hasn’t really talked about me. And I don’t really know what any of that means. I haven’t seen him around either. I think he’s avoiding me and I can’t help thinking about what I did that was so wrong for me to be treated this way. I don’t….I don’t think I deserve this.” You exhale a shallow breath, eyes stinging painfully. Jungkook suddenly plops his hand on the top of your head. You frown at him and he realizes what he’s doing and withdraws his hand awkwardly. “That really...sucks.” “Yeah, thanks, I know.” “Sorry, I don’t really know what to say.” “You don’t have to say anything,” you tell. “Thanks for not laughing, I guess.” “Why would I laugh?” Jungkook asks, genuinely confused. You shrug. You always thought Jungkook would be the first to applaud your misery — he’d goad you and cheer you when you’d cry. You guess you severely misjudged him. “Are you free tonight?” “Why?” “My friends and I are doing this thing.” Jungkook scratches the back of his neck and diverts his vision elsewhere. “We meet up to play games sometimes. It’s really Taehyung’s thing cause he’s the one who likes games, but if you’re free, then you should come along. We’re in need of new players actually, cause it gets boring when it’s the same people over and over again….” “Would they mind?” He swallows hard, taking in the way your head is quirked to the side, your eyes big and glimmering with hope. It seems like you’re taking him up on the offer or at least considering it and he’s pleasantly surprised. “No, no, they wouldn’t.” “I don’t want to make it weird or anything…” “No, you wouldn’t. Trust me. They’re just a bunch of lame dorks, and you kind of already know Taehyung and Jimin. They’re nice guys. So if you wanna come, you should. No pressure whatsoever though.” “Sure.” The corners of your mouth lifts. “Really?” “Yeah. That’s….okay, right?” “Totally. Yep. I’ll text you where and what time.” You never knew one day you’d be going off campus to some random apartment for a night of game boards, much less with Jeon Jungkook. Part of you is skeptical about his offer, envisioning that he’s catfishing you somehow, that there isn’t actually anything happening and he’ll text you ‘sike’ after making you wait hours. But then you remind yourself that he hasn’t been exactly an asshole lately and that you’re not in the cruel world of High School anymore. Jungkook would have to be sick to prank you in this state. You can already hear the boisterous noise on the other side of the door before you even knock. But after some hesitation, the sounds taper off when you do. The door swings open and Jungkook greets you with his doe eyes and messy dark hair flopping in different directions. He’s in a black shirt and loose, gray sweatpants, casual unlike how he usually dresses for class and the kitchen. “Hey!” He reaches in to give you a quick hug. You stiffen and he lets go. “Come in!” “Finally, she’s here!” Hoseok stands from the couch with his beer and moves to the table Taehyung’s setting up. “Sorry, am I late?” “Right on time actually,” Jimin says with a gentle smile. “Beer or cooler or wine?” Yoongi suddenly asks, twisting around from the fridge. “A-Any.” It’s fast paced, but they’re welcoming. There’s not a moment for awkwardness to settle in. Yoongi comes over with a beer can, tosses it, and you catch it with both hands. “Thanks.” “We usually start with a game of good ol’ Janga.” Taehyung grins from his spot at the table. “Usually the person who goes before the loser gets to pick the next game, but since you’re our guest of honour, you can pick. There’s a whole shelf of them over there.” He gestures towards the living room and you head over to look at the boxes that are accumulating. There’s a ton of boxes stack on each other on the shelf — The Game of Life, Risk, Twister, Battleship, Monopoly, Connect Four, Snakes and Ladders, and even CandyLand. “What’s this?” you ask, pointing at the bottom shelf with a huge bin. There seems to be small bags inside, place mats, and books too. “It’s stuff for D&D,” Jungkook clarifies with a sigh, popping a can of beer open to drink. “Dungeons and Dragons.” “Taehyung’s been wanting to get us to play,” Jimin tells with a smile. “I’m a great DM,” Taehyung chirps, “It would be so much fun, but we don’t really have time for a whole campaign. Otherwise I’d pull together official content and stuff from Unearthed Arcana and run a module from Wizards of the Coast—” “Alright, nerd.” Yoongi sighs after a swig. “I’m not trying to re-virgin myself and remain abstinent for the rest of my life, alright? You can do that by yourself.” “Don’t hate on my game, bitch,” Taehyung spits as Jimin and Jungkook laugh. A smile comes to your face and it isn’t one you have to muster for once. “Wait till the day you come to me and ask me advice on what kind of spells a halfling bard should have at level six.” “Over my dead body.” “Okay, can we not argue for once? We have a guest.” Hoseok intercepts with his hands out, literally standing between them. “Let’s try to not scare her off?” You go back to looking, but you can’t seem to decide what game to play. “There’s a lot.” “It’s not ours,” Yoongi pipes up again, wearing a friendly smile that is more like a smirk. “This is Hoseok and I’s place. Taehyung just always finds a way to put his shit here too.” “Hey! That’s cause no one else has a big table like this at their dorm, plus my place is too messy to store my precious games there. They’re expensive, you know.” “All I know is that somehow I always come home to furniture and clothes on my bed that I swear I didn’t purchase….” “Alright, alright.” Hoseok intervenes for the second time, having enough of this nonsense. “Is the game done being set up or what? Y/N come sit, you can choose the game later.” You gather around the table with Jungkook beside you. He leans in while the others are figuring out who gets to start and what direction to go in. “Sorry about that.” “No, it’s okay,” you say and mean it too. “Your friends are a lot of fun.” Yet the moment the game begins, there’s a shift in the atmosphere. It goes quieter, less fooling around as it intensely dials down. There are half-lidded stares across the table, snarky remarks exchanged. They’re a competitive group and you feel a lot of pressure to perform well. Jimin seems to go for the easy blocks. Hoseok tries to make it more difficult for the next person. Yoongi is the designated asshole, going for the second top layer while Taehyung argues that it isn’t even allowed. On the other hand, Jungkook somehow flicks the Jenga block with his middle finger and thumb. He’s cocky about his technique, leaning back as his arm drapes over the back of your chair. He runs his tongue on the inside of his cheek with his brow lifted. You remember why you fucking hated him now. He’s so unbearable sometimes. “What?” He looks at you when he finds you staring. You frown at him. And for a second Jungkook gets a glimpse of the bitch he remembers — the one he misses. “Why do you have to be so extra about it? Who are you trying to impress?” “Right?!” Taehyung stands up and the entire stack of blocks nearly topples over. “I keep trying to tell him that! It’s so goddamn annoying! You won’t even believe it!” “Watch it,” Hoseok shouts, “You’re going to make it tip over.” That’s when you become fired up. You’ve never felt this kind of motivation surging between your veins before. But it’s not a thirst to win — it’s a ravenous hunger to beat Jeon Jungkook. And you do. After playing to Hoseok’s tactic and being an asshole, you risk it all to remove an important block and it collapses on Jungkook right as he tries to remove another. Then there are screams — hoots, hollers, like your country won the damn world cup. You stand up and everyone cheers. Hoseok chest bumps you. Taehyung lifts you up and spins you in a circle. Jimin starts to record the moment on his phone and even Yoongi pats you on the back. “God, why are you guys making such a big deal,” Jungkook moans, still seated at the table, embarrassed from all the teasing. “Maybe because you’ve never lost anything in your life!” Taehyung laughs in his face, rubbing his loss where it hurts. “Say something for the camera.” Jimin sticks his phone right between Jungkook’s eyes, and dodges with giggles when Jungkook tries to slap it away. “Hey, send me that.” Yoongi points. “I’m going to post it on facebook for my grandma to see.” “Has Jungkook really not lost any game we’ve played before?” Hoseok questions, the realization finally hitting him and the gravity of the situation sinking down onto his shoulders. “I don’t think so,” Jimin says after sincerely contemplating for a long moment. “Oh shit. You’re our lucky charm!” Hoseok slings his arm over your shoulder, giving you finger guns and winking. It’s ridiculous but you’re beginning to believe it too — especially when the game you pick is Uno and it ends up with a similar outcome. Somehow, someway, Jimin, Taehyung, Hoseok and Yoongi finish their cards and the only people who are left are you and Jungkook. The tensions are high and you see the sweat accumulating at his hairline. It’s apparent that he’s never even been second last in a game before. You’re so close to victory, you can taste it. You’re down to a single card while he has three more. Jungkook slowly places down a wild card. “What colour do you want, Y/N?” “Hmmmm.” You rest your chin in your palm, arm propped up on the table. You glance at your card before looking straight at him, locking your gaze together. “Would you even choose the colour I pick?” “I just want to hear what you want.” “Fine. I want yellow. Please?” You bat your lashes. “Pretty please, JK?” The ass smirks. “Red.” “I knew you’d say that,” you sigh. Your fingers reach down to the pile to grab another card, but then your other hand slaps down — slamming a red four onto the pile. Your arms shoot in the air. Again, it triggers cheers. “I win!” Jungkook throws back his head and groans. He tosses his one red and one blue card left onto the table. What’s worse is the way you gather with all his friends — the five of you huddled together with arms around one another, like you’re preparing for a football game. But instead, you’re all hopping and cheering while belting out the national anthem. You’ve stolen his own friends from right under his nose. But despite how the loss is rubbed in his face, Jungkook’s happy that it seems like for a moment, you’ve returned to yourself again. Eventually, the games go so much into the night that you have to bid your goodbyes. You didn’t know Jungkook’s group of friends were so easy to get along and get comfortable with. You weren’t sure what you were expecting, but the time passed so quickly and you’re sad to leave. Hoseok and Taehyung hug you until Yoongi has to help you pry them off. “I’ll miss you so much,” Taehyung fake cries. “You and the way you absolutely demolish Jungkook.” “Oh please.” Jungkook rolls his eyes. “I’ll come back...if you’ll have me again.” “Are you kidding? Of course!” “You have to come back,” Jimin insists with a sheepish smile like it should be obvious. “You’re good at Monopoly, right?” You shrug. “I’ve been told I’m decent.” “You better be.” Yoongi grins. “I’ll expect you to win against Kook.” “I’ll try my best.” “Let me walk you back,” Jungkook says as you grab your coat. You look at him and he elaborates, “It’s a long way back to the dorm and I’m tired too. Gonna call it an early night.” “Oh, okay.” The two of you get ready to leave, and at the doorway, you turn around one last time. “Thanks for having me.” “No problem.” Hoseok smiles. “Come back soon.” You think this is the longest time you’ve been without crying for the past month. It went by too quickly — you wish you could do it all over again. But you consider how lucky Jungkook is. He has great friends and surrounds himself with great people. You’re jealous. The night is silent except for the sound of your shoes against the cement of the sidewalk. You’re illuminated by the lamp posts above you and you watch your shadows alongside Jungkook’s. The air is cold enough that you can see your breath as you exhale. Jungkook’s own hands are dug into his pockets, but the chill makes you feel alive. “Sorry about them. I know they can get a bit much.” “It’s okay. They’re really nice actually.” “Yeah, they are.” “I had a lot of fun.” You steal a glance at him. Jungkook’s doe eyes widen, the corners of his mouth quirking. “Really? I’m glad.” “It was a lot of fun destroying you.” “Wow.” He laughs. “Okay.” It makes you giggle too. You know what he’s been doing. From him listening to everything you have to say and doing more than necessary during the midterms. From that time he called you over in the dining hall to sit with him to tonight, bringing you over to play games with his friends…. “Thanks, Jungkook.” “Hm?” “Thanks,” you repeat, looking at him, and he meets your eye. “For helping me. I don’t think I’ve said it yet. But I really appreciate it.” “Yeah, it’s not a big deal, really.” “It’s a big deal to me.” Your gaze softens. At the moment you had no one, he was there. You didn’t know you would find such an unlikely friendship during such a hard time, but you don’t mind at all. Jeon Jungkook is your friend.

#bts fanfic #bts scenario #jungkook fanfic #jungkook scenario #jungkook fluff #jungkook x reader #jungkook baking AU #bts fanfiction #jungkook fanfiction #jungkook reader insert

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shadowmayura · 3 years

Text

I didn’t think I’d be doing this, but it’s gotten to the point where some things have to be said.

Someone from my past has been making vagueposts about me lately and I can’t allow it to go unaddressed any longer. They are disingenuous and at times downright false, and they imply a certain type of relationship that simply did not exist.

If at this point you don’t know exactly who and what I’m talking about, please scroll by. I’m not going to be mentioning her by name and I’m not here to drag additional people into this big mess. This is solely to address any misconceptions for those who have already seen this person’s posts and are left confused by the strange phrasing and missing information.

(TW: harassment, emotional abuse, stalking, vomit)

This person and I met online in the spring of last year. Soon after, she confessed to me that she had a crush on me. I wasn’t interested for a variety of reasons (distance, not knowing her very well, and a lack of attraction on my end) and I gently let her down but suggested that we could still be friends. At no point did I promise a romantic relationship with this person.

We got to know each other better as friends. For a while, it was genuinely fun. I did not harbor any romantic feelings but I did enjoy being her friend. But in the summer, we began to spend more time together, and that’s where it started to go wrong. In reality, it was gradual, but it felt very sudden because the realization that things had changed came all at once. Her flirting had become a lot more aggressive and she was implying to other people that there was something between us. Playful teasing had turned to something far more demanding, and we were talking to each other nonstop, up to 10 hours per day every single day. When I realized how drastically our interactions had changed, I tried to pull back. I became very uncomfortable with how much couple-like behavior had emerged on her side when I did not want to be in that kind of relationship.

My decision was met with a lot of resistance. She was upset at me that I wanted to cut back on the amount of one-on-one time spent together, and she also was upset when I took a week-long break from Discord as a whole. We had our first argument over this. I thought we reached an understanding, but at the end of the conversion, she expressed her need for significant quality time between us, leaving me feeling like I hadn’t been heard at all. It’s worth noting that I hadn’t cut her out entirely at this point. We were still talking almost every day, but we weren’t on voice chat for hours on end any longer. I just wanted interactions that were closer to a normal friendship rather than a romantic relationship that I had never consented to.

It got worse leading into fall. The flirting continued and escalated. She drew “friendship portraits” of the two of us with strong romantic undertones. As she continued to push, I drew back. She didn’t like this. I was met with passive aggression when I tried to set boundaries and put a comfortable distance between us.

September is where it reached a head. On September 17th, she coerced me into a video chat that essentially served as an intervention for my choice. I had a bad feeling going into it, but she insisted that we video chat rather than text chat. I reluctantly agreed under her false pretense that it would be a conversation solely about fandom matters, but within 5 minutes, she was crying on video. I became very uncomfortable and I continued to look at a document on my computer so she could compose herself. She calmed down, but as soon as I claimed to be done looking at it, she turned the crying on again.

For about an hour, I was berated. She was crying and yelling, not allowing me to get a word in edgewise. She was, once again, very upset with me that I had been pulling away from her. I desperately wanted to leave the call, but I knew that there’d be hell to pay later if I did. I forced myself to sit through the whole thing. When she was done, I was shaking. She expected me to speak but I was unable to form words for several minutes and I was additionally berated for not saying anything, even though I had already been cut off many times. When I was able to pull myself out of the state I was in, I told her that our interactions had become far too romantically-focused for my comfort and that I didn’t want her to flirt with me anymore. I then ended the conversation as quickly as I could.

I vomited several times after we hung up and was shaking for hours. I couldn’t sleep that night. A few days later, I lost clumps of hair. It is stress-induced alopecia areata that I’m still receiving treatment for. I don’t say any of this to garner sympathy, but I want to emphasize that this was not a conversation that I look back on fondly. It was traumatic. This unfortunately is relevant later.

At this point, it is safe to say that I did not want to associate with this person any longer, but this was not an option for me. There were fandom commitments that tethered us together, and I knew I’d have to weather out the storm. If I didn’t, I would tear friend groups apart, drop commitments that I cared a lot about, and potentially ruin both of our reputations in the community.

I tried to maintain some distance without angering her significantly, but it was all downhill from here. She continued to disrespect my boundaries and push me romantically. Flirting occurred less commonly in private chats since I would shut it down, but in public spaces, she continued to flirt with me, and I felt pressured to allow it in order to avoid awkwardness in group settings.

Her romantic interest turned into obsession. She became fixated on my Tumblr posts and Discord statuses, accusing me of referencing her when this was seldom the case. Jealousy arose about my friendships with other people. She didn’t trust me to make my own decisions with my friendships and disrespected my decisions when I made them. There was also a huge increase in emotional manipulation and guiltbaiting. Whenever calm and rational criticism of her behavior was given to her, she would exaggerate and call herself a terrible person so that the criticism would be dropped in favor of coddling and comforting her. It was impossible to bring up serious issues without her playing the victim.

She also became increasingly hard to deal with in a team environment. I often felt as if I was being disciplined for not loving her in return. My ideas were constantly nitpicked and shot down. I was condescended to. I began to feel unwelcome in group spaces because of these behaviors. I felt like she was pushing me out of public spaces in hopes that I would flee to private ones, though I tried to avoid that as much as possible.

In November, a flip switched. The romantic harassment almost entirely vanished and all her interactions with me became unkind. In some ways, it was refreshing because the worst of the stalking subsided, but the hostile environment was not easy to deal with. I retreated from fandom in order to avoid it as much as possible.

Finally in December, my fandom commitments finally ended, giving me the ability to end my friendship with her. Right before this, she spoke negatively of me in some public ways. One of these actions I cannot name here because it would reveal her identity, but it spoke ill of a community that I oversee.

The worst, however, was a fanfic that she published several days before I cut her off. She projected her and I onto the main couple of the fic. I was cast as Gabriel and she was cast as Nathalie. The further I read, the more sickened I became as the references became more overt.

Near the end of the fic, Gabriel and Nathalie have a huge argument. I was shocked to find exact quotes from our September 17th video chat in the dialogue of the fic. They were large sections of our conversation. At the end of their argument, Gabriel admitted all wrong and they make amends. As a couple.

I felt ill reading this. I still feel ill thinking about it. I hate that one of the most traumatic conversations in my life still exists on the internet for anyone to read, twisted into a scene that is meant to be read as good and romantic. I am reminded of all the harassment that I endured and I hate that that is a feeling I now associate with one of my favorite ships. There are other creators involved as well whose work has now been tainted by these real-world associations that had no business being in a fanfic.

After this, I cut her out of my life entirely. I was considering less drastic options, but this was the last straw that I knew we could not come back from. I removed her from several of my social circles and blocked her on all social media.

Before I blocked her, I sent a letter explaining in explicit detail why I would be cutting her out of my life. Despite this, she has recently claimed that she was never given a reason.

And that’s where we are now. My life has been more peaceful since December and I have begun to come out of my shell. For a couple of months she left the situation alone and that was fine with me. I was happy to peacefully coexist as long as I wasn’t having to interact directly.

However, my friends began calling my attention to recent posts on her blog that implied I had destroyed her mental health. Some of them have since been deleted. While I was willing to let the first one slide, these posts have increased in frequency while pushing an increasingly false narrative. I don’t enjoy the implications that I did something horrible to her by not consenting to a relationship.

I’m sure she will disagree with my take on things, and that’s fine. If she disagrees with my reasons with cutting her off, that is her prerogative, but I cannot allow her to claim that I didn’t give any reasoning when she did receive it through multiple channels of communication.

And I hope I haven’t gone a step too far in revealing that this person was in love with me. I debated not including it, but I’ve realized it’s an unavoidable issue that is central to the entire situation. At the root of it, I was romantically pursued and harassed. I cannot defend my reasons for cutting her off without disclosing the base motivation for the majority of her actions.

So that’s my story. I’d ask those who read this to please refrain from engaging in any harassment. This post has not been made with the intention to hurt her, as can be evidenced from months of me holding my tongue. I really did try to let her preserve her dignity, but I was left with no other options after being smeared multiple times. My purpose here is transparency.

I genuinely do wish her well, for both our sakes. I really hope that this will finally end her obsession and allow her to move on. But whatever happens, I refuse to be a doormat any longer in this situation.

#life of a corn #non ml #kinda #summary of the last 10 months of my life

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ryanberga · 4 years

Note

At some point will you post some sort of transcript/verbatum of what was said for those of us who haven’t listened/can’t listen so we can understand the situation and what exactly was said in what context (no pressure because I know you said you haven’t listened to it either but some of us [me] are confused and only know that bad things were said but not like what and in what context) thank you for this blog wishing you a less stressful day

i went ahead and transcribed the entire last question for you so that you have the full context. this is 10-15 minutes worth of dialogue so apologies that it's so long! i cut out any irrelevant banter/jokes, and i stopped the transcript where i did because that's the end of the bulk of it. i bolded the parts that i (and most people) have taken issue with

Katie: [reading question] "Guys! I'm in a really sticky situation. For context, I live in rural Ireland, and I'm meant to be starting my first year at uni (you'd say college). My problem is that there's a girl in my friend group that I really despise. There's eight of us in total, so it's easy enough to stay clear of her, but moving to uni was meant to be the perfect time to be able to cut all ties. It's safe for us here in Ireland to be meeting outdoors and even indoors, and I had my friends over for camping a while ago. She didn't show, and it was the first time I felt comfortable in my friend group, as well as the fact that my friend group didn't split into two separate groups as it usually would. I want to go camping again with my friends because it would be such fun, but I don't want to invite her but at the same time don't want to be excluding someone. For context, the problem I have with her is that she can be very judgmental to the point of slut-shaming, as well as having homophobic and racist views. I recently had two friends inside the group come out to me, and one (a newer friend) is oblivious to her views, as she has been less outspoken in the recent year. I'm at a loss what to do because I hate confrontation and don't want to start any drama but am frankly uncomfortable with her. Is it mean to exclude her because who knows if we'll get to start uni and make new friends anytime soon?" [end question] Um, so I chose this because uhh... you know, I think it's a very relatable, common thing to have sort of a friend group that coalesces and to value the group a lot but to figure out over time that maybe somebody in it... you know, doesn't share your ideals or values and to sort of not know what to do when that comes up. And sort of bigger than this person's question, I also think that something that's sort of going on right now is that a lot of people are realizing that they have family or friends or people that they're close to in some capacity that maybe are not as woke as they could be and are maybe resistant to having conversations that they should be having or seeing things in a more progressive light, especially with a lot of what's been going on this year. Um, so it's a really tough thing, I think, to have somebody that you're close to have views that you can't support morally and, you know, with this person, it's easier in the sense that it doesn't sound like she's very close to this person, so if she could just cut her out of her life, it sounds like she'd be happy enough. For a lot of people, that is a tougher choice. So I wanted to talk about it because, um... you know, I think it's a really difficult situation to be in, and, you know, I think if it were me, with this particular group of friends, you know, look, I think if you were just disagreeing over, like, you know, liking peanut butter and jelly sandwiches versus peanut butter and fluff sandwiches, I'd just tell you to, like, get over it and, you know, make peace for the sake of the group because, you know, it's a group of friends, and you like everybody else, so whatever. But racist, homophobic views are not something to just, like, kind of ignore and push aside, especially if you've got friends in the group who literally could be really negatively affected by that. Um... you know, and there's a difference, too, if this person made a joke that they weren't aware of the ramifications of that could maybe be explained to them or maybe could sort of help them work through something, or if this person holds sincere, you know, sincerely racist or homophobic views that aren't—that go beyond ignorance that are, you know, rooted in something deeper. Um, and if it's the latter, you know, I would suggest talking to other friends and seeing if they're having similar impressions of this person, and, you know, if that's the case, you know, I do think that it would be worth finding other friends, you know. That's harsh, but you can't allow yourself and your friends to be influenced by somebody who isn't open to recognizing their humanity. [chuckles]

Katie (cont.): Uhh, and that's obviously the biggest and most dramatic, uhh, that that could go. If this person has maybe made an off-color joke or something and is just ignorant of the ramifications of that joke, don't know where it's origins are, don't know where it came from, then maybe try the softer approach first, try sitting with them one-on-one and being like, "Hey, so, you know, we've been friends for a while, and I've noticed that you've said a couple of things, and I just, you know, they've been offensive to me, and they've hurt me, and I just wanted to see what you meant by them," and sort of let them explain themselves, and if they're just like, "Oh, I didn't—it was just a joke!" then sort of talk to them, tell them why it's not just a joke, tell them why it could hurt people and, without outing anyone in your group, tell them that, you know, you maybe know people who might have been hurt by that. Um, and see if they could around because you're, you know, that would be giving them a chance to sort of realize that maybe they were on the other side of things when they didn't realize that they were, and it gives them a chance to have discourse and maybe see things differently. And, if they don't, well, you know... Yeah, you're going to uni, cut ties. Sorry.

Steven: That's a very tough question.

Shane: Are they going to uni with the person?

Katie: Uh, I think she was saying that they're going to uni and that was going to sort of break up the friend group, so she wasn't worried about it?

Shane: Oh. I see.

Katie: But because, um... Because, like, it's being delayed...

Shane: Mhm.

Steven: Yeah. Ohhh, I see.

Katie: She's sort of still hanging out with this group, and she's having a tough time with it.

Steven: Right. And wants to go camping.

Katie: And, yeah, specifically, she's got this last thing, she wants to have another camping trip with this group of friends. She just needs to not invite this person, but obviously that would probably be seen as a bit harsh by everybody. So. I don't know, that's my first blush at it. Do you guys have...?

Shane: Yeah, I mean, I would talk to them. I don't know if it's talking to them with, uh, other friends to make it seem like it's not, you know, a one-on-one thing, but I guess you also don't wanna... I don't know, it's very situational. I would definitely talk to them, and then, you know, try to communicate the weight of things, you know. Some people are very flippant with things. Also, you know, their empathy center kinda involves a little slower than others. Uh, some people are not intentionally malicious when they're younger, they just don't realize uh, you know, the impact of certain things, and, uh, I think people are capable of growing and learning, uh, which is great, especially young people. Um... but uh... you know, at a certain point, it's not your responsibility to... to... [chuckles] uh, force them to grow. Uh, so, I would say have a conversation with them. Try to push them in a direction, and if that's not working then maybe... maybe they have to be comfortable with the fact that you don't want to hang out with them anymore. You know?

Katie: Yeah. I agree.

Shane: That's what I'd say.

Katie: Mhm.

Steven: I mean, but the question really is how does this person do this camping trip or does—do you exclude her? Do you not—because I'm trying to think of the solution for that, and that's where I'm—I mean, frankly, I'm kind of stuck, too because, like you said, Shane, it's very situational. It's hard to really read into this because I have a lot of friends who are a little bit racist and a little homophobic, and I'm still friends with them. And I'm not saying that, uh, I'm still friends with them because of their values, I'm... I.... I just value them as people themselves, and I try to keep them around and try to, you know, educate them with what I can, but it's not something that, um... I don't want to... I don't know, I don't want to cut ties with everybody because of their belief system because I—frankly, I have a different value system from Katie and Shane and Ryan, like, we're—I think a lot of it is on a spectrum, but if this person is outwardly judgmental, it's really hard to say. It's hard for me to, uh, read into this because my initial reaction is to try to be as understanding as possible to this person, and to at least try to have a conversation, like Shane was saying. Um, and it would be mean to exclude her because it would be targeted at her specifically, but, um, the way to get ahead of that is... all you gotta do is be super passive-aggressive and find a camping spot that only allows seven people.

Shane: [laughs]

Katie: [laughs]

Steven: No, no, that's not the answer, that's not the answer! Don't do that! Um—

Shane: You probably wanna have the conversation before the camping trip.

Steven: Yes.

Katie: Yeah!

Shane: Ideally.

Steven: Just talk to the person directly. I think that's the only way to have to do it, and to, like, do it respectfully. Honestly? It's gonna hurt, it's gonna suck, and they may hate you forever, but it seems like you don't really care what they think about you anyway, so, uh, just have the hard conversation, but, when you do, don't come across it as "I am judging you for your judgmentalness." It's more like, "Hey, I want to do this out of, like, you know, because I care about you as a person, even though I don't believe everything you believe. I want you to change, and I want you to grow." And having that posture of patience is better and will come across a lot cleaner and maybe she won't be so defensive about her thoughts. It's a tough one.

#anonymous #answered #long post

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daily-dose-of-imagines · 3 years

Text

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Matchup ♥

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Naruto, One Piece, and Free Match-Up Request

May I request another match-up but for Free, One Piece, and Naruto this time? :) Here’s all my info once more!

Name: Corethra (or Corey for short)

Age: 25

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Hand Packer at an ice cream factory. I work 12 hours (5:30pm to 6am) on a rotating schedule.

Birthplace: Memphis, TN, USA. I was raised in the neighborhood called Frayser which is the most impoverished area in Memphis and has a high crime rate as expected.

Zodiac Sign: Pisces (born March 2) My full birth chart can be found here

Enneagram: 5w6

Chinese Zodiac: Year Of The Pig

MBTI Type: INFJ

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Love Language: Acts Of Service

Race/Ethnicity: African-American

Height: 4'11 (Call me short and I’ll kick your butt!)

Body Type/Shape: Average but well developed figure at best. I weigh about 158 lbs and am pretty insecure about my body. I also have really bad scars on my left arm from being bitten by a dog.

Hair Color/Style: Black and naturally curly but I keep it flat-ironed so it’s straight. It’s long and goes down to just below my shoulder blades. There are times when I will have braids put in of various lengths.

Glasses or No?: Yes I wear glasses

Eye Color: Brown

Dress Style: I usually dress up in a casual way, just throwing on whatever looks good at the time but I will sometimes put in the effort when the time calls for it or when I’m in a good mood. I have an affinity for the punk, emo, and goth styles and I rarely wear feminine clothes but I will wear something risky every once in a while.

Hobbies/Interests: Video games, reading, writing, anime, internet surfing, listening to music, politics (sometimes), watching movies/TV shows, basically being an overall nerd. I’m usually either on my laptop or one of my many video game consoles if I’m not on my phone or reading one of my books.

Dislikes: Ignorance, stupidity, restriction, manipulation/gas-lighting, bullying, humanity, not being understood, corruption/injustice, close-mindedness

Personality: At first glance, I seem quiet and keep to myself, only speaking when I need to or when I’m spoken to. I’m an anti-social introvert to the fullest and don’t care much for small talk or going out. I prefer to have deeper conversations. When I get comfortable enough in whatever environment I’m in, I start to open up bit by bit. I’m a tomboy and pretty rough-minded as well as stubborn. I’m very sassy, have a smart, sarcastic, and witty mouth if not humorous and outrageous at times, can be borderline rude and mean, and I’m more sensitive than I care to be. I can literally cry at someone’s suffering especially if it’s someone I’m close to or even a total stranger. I’m very empathetic and my heart is bigger than what most people would expect. Most people describe me as quiet, intelligent, creative, dorky, a smartass, and really sweet. I love a good laugh and have an open sense of humor to boot.

Many of my friends say that I’m very sweet and kind which I usually am if I’m in a good mood as well as affectionate as hell. Hugs and pet names galore with me! However only my friends and family see that side of me. My language is often unfiltered, harsh, foul, and blunt which shocks people because they think I’m a pure angel. I say what I want when I want and no one tells me otherwise. If they do, they can expect a mouthful from me. I’m an escapist and very imaginative, can be a bit scatterbrained at times, and I’m methodical and detailed to the point of perfectionism. I’m usually a walking contradiction in terms of personality in so many ways to the point where the real me is almost impossible to decipher. To make matters more complicated, I’m not very good at expressing myself verbally and prefer to let my actions do the talking. I also express myself better through written form.

I have many pet peeves and I get annoyed easily in general. I’m also slowly embracing misanthropy and nihilism but I can be pretty idealistic so it balances out. I’m practically zero tolerance when it comes to bullshit. I hate confrontation and conflict but I’m starting to work on it so I can be less passive-aggressive and more assertive. I also wish to stand up for myself more often than I should so people won’t think that I’m weak and an easy target. I’m pretty cynical which is to be expected and usually expect the worst from people. When someone angers me, I will either just withdraw altogether and completely cut them off (slam the door basically) or get in their face and go off before doing the former. I’m the “hold my anger in and release it all at once” type but I hope to change that one day and stop letting things fester before they get out of hand. I can be quite petty and even cold as well and if someone wrongs me, they will have to make the first move to mend fences. I refuse to apologize if I’m not in the wrong and I will not accept gaslighting/guilt tripping. I also refuse to change for others and will admit to having quite a lot of pride but that’s mostly due to me not wanting to be hurt and manipulated, mistreated, or used.

I have issues with trust and a wild imagination to boot. I usually trust my instincts and can see right through bullshit. I don’t like taking risks and I have to know all the details when I do something so I don’t mess up and look like an idiot. I am indeed a perfectionist and introverted to a fault which often prevents me from trying new things and going outside my comfort zone. I haven’t been in a relationship yet and am still a virgin due to my issues with trust and not wanting to be hurt or humiliated as well as being quite picky/perfectionistic with the people I allow in my life. I have high standards for both people and myself although I’m pretty laid-back and my dislike of conflict allows me to also take a lot of shit from people too before I eventually say “fuck it” and slam the door or go off on them. I don’t think very highly of myself and can sometimes fall into a period of self-hatred and self-pity.

Many people praise me for my intelligence which is fitting since I’m an intellectual. My ideals and beliefs are rather odd to say the least (I’m a classical liberal/independent and despise most ideologies/ideas. This includes religion, feminism, social justice, traditionalism, statism, big government, nationalism, socialism/communism, etc.) and I feel misunderstood because of it (mostly because of the black community ostracizing me). I am indeed a rebel, open-minded, and a free thinker. No one tells me how to think or feel or else they face my wrath. I highly value power over myself and I think it’s the most important thing that a person needs in order to survive. I am definitely an outcast at heart and I often distance myself from others and don’t like talking about my feelings or beliefs because I think most people lack the ability/capacity to understand me. Before I give my opinion on something, I like to do as much research as possible as well as look at things from all perspectives before coming to my own conclusion. I don’t mind discussing things but I prefer logic over emotion when doing so which makes it damn near impossible these days for me to have an real conversation without insults and threats being thrown (usually towards me). Chances are I’m gonna find something wrong with damn near anything someone believes in or says and I’m not afraid to call it out when I see it. Once I do open up and express how I feel, the gates of passion will open up and never close. I also have high morals and values and stick to my guns no matter what which can make me pretty stubborn at times.

I’m currently battling depression and often experience many symptoms of it including suicidal thoughts and depression spells. I also suffer from iron-deficiency anemia as well as irregular, prolonged periods. These things are pretty annoying for me to deal with whenever they flare up.

Overall, I’m pretty crazy and a handful to deal with. Good luck matching me up with someone :P

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Hello @sacredwarrior88 and thank you so much for requesting with us! I am so sorry that this came out so late, but I do hope you enjoy this!

>Admin 𝕋

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

𝐼 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽…

Ace! I feel that you and ace would be such a great couple! He is open minded and kind to others whereas you are the same way! You are passionate like he is, caring like he is, loyal to the bone like he is! He would see you and see your personality and just instantly fall in love you and your personality! Like, I can’t even imagine how much he will want you on his crew, so they he can keep on you and protect you at all times-- though he will soon figure out that you don’t need help, you can take care yourself--which he will find extremely attractive, no doubt about that!

He will love that fact that you are independent, because he really values individualism and independency, he sees it as a great traits to have. But he will also love the fact that you are sensitive, and can sometimes get into your own head. He understands that, knows it all too well, so he will try with all his might to try and make sure that you are happy and always smiling! But he will love how fierce you can be to other people, never bowing down to their expectations!

All in all, I feel like Ace would be a great man for you in the one piece universe! He would be attentive to you, would love your attitude and personality, and would absolutely adore how loyal and strong you are! make sure to love him thoroughly!

Ah, Sai! He is much like Ace, just a little less emotional, which is fine! I feel like you and Sai would make a couple for a couple reasons! He would love how mature you are, and how logical you can be, and-- like ace-- he loves the fact that you are extremely loyal to your friends! That is a true factor in the way he will see you, and it is for the better! He will se how strong you are, emotionally and will be envious and at the same time fascinated! I Feel like Sai will look at you with wide eyes, his breath caught in his throat, his heart beating wildly in his ribcage because he will love you that much! All the things you are interested he will want to hear with enthusiasm, everything you love he will want to learn and hear from you, to get to know you better!

Another thing is that if you were to go to him with your insecurities and how you are battling depression, he will try to understand, and once he does he will try to everything and anything to make sure you feel better! You need a massage? He’s on it! You need cuddles? oh yeah he will give you some! You need chocolate or sweets or anything of the like? He’ll run to the store, and be back 5 minutes tops!

All in all, I feel like the cool, mature Sai, with a heart of pure gold will be such a good match for you! He will make sure that you uncomfortable with him, he will never want to make you unhappy, and he will definitely do anything i his power to make sure that you will keep on loving him as much as you can!

Rei! Now, with Rei, I wanted to go a more cute route. I feel that Rei would be equal parts and scared and in love with you! He sees how strong you are against people that oppose, he sees how strong you are for your friends, and how you have such a different personality to everybody else around him, and he will immediately fall in with you. Like instantly! To him, you’d be like a beautiful butterfly blooming right in front of him, and he will want to have you all tot himself! Of course, he won’t force you, but he will definitely watch you at a distance longingly!

He is very much an introvert and your calm but strong aura would definitely help with his anxiety! I just see him melting next you, into your lap or shoulder whenever you are around him because he is so comfortable around you. He doesn’t do this with just anybody so it would be a real honor! And when it it comes to your insecurities, he would want to make sure that you know he loves you the way are, and if you were to want to change something about yourself, then he will support you all the way, as long as you are happy! He will just love that you are such a freethinker and so openminded about things, so unlike him!

All in all, I feel like Rei would love you and (somewhat) idolize because you have all these traits that he would love to have. This perfectionist will understand how it feels to be such a perfectionist and will want to help you with that too! He will love to the moon and back(stroke)!

#match-ups #matchup #submissions #anime matchup #submission #naruto matchup #free! matchup #one piece matchup #naruto x you #free x you #one piece x you

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detective-with-one-arm · 3 years

Text

I didn’t think I’d have to make this post. I wish I didn’t have to make this post. But I have to make this post because I thought I was being as clear as possible, but maybe I need to be clearer somehow.

I have this rule outlined on my rules page:

I have RSD (Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria). So if I’m being annoying or I’m making a mistake in some way, please tell me! I’m not being an asshole, I’m just kinda dense and don’t have a lot of self-awareness, but I try my hardest. So please tell me if I overstep my boundaries or I’m being annoying.

However, I would like to make an addendum to this. Because I’ve had several incidents of people not communicating effectively with me despite how clear I’ve been with this and I’m getting tired of having this rule disregarded and treated as an afterthought, so this is my effort of making this clearer and to try and explain myself properly and why this is so important to me.

I am autistic. This is not a fact that can be ignored or brushed aside. It’s part of who I am and it affects all aspects of my interactions with others and the world. What this means for others is that I cannot pick things up intuitively. I need to have things explained to me otherwise I will not get them. This is especially true of social stuff. I also have a hard time reading tones, jokes, sarcasm, and generally picking up on social cues and such.

Basically, unless I’m directly told something, I likely won’t get it. Conversational subtext is difficult for me to pick up on especially on a text-based media platform.

As such, I need clear and open communication. This is non-negotiable. This isn’t a preference. This is a boundary I have established and a need that I need to have accommodated. I have said this many times to other people in my friend circles and in private, but maybe I wasn’t clear enough. So, I’m going to take this effort to outline what that means for me to avoid incidents of miscommunications leading to really bad escalations that could be easily avoided.

You do not have to write with me. Period. I will never force you to do anything you don’t want to do. If you don’t want to write with me at all, that is okay. I don’t mind at all. Just let me know that you’re not interested. You don’t even need to give me a reason why. You do not have to answer any starters or asks I send in. You can comfortably delete them from your inbox without saying a word and I’m okay with that. If we rp together and we’re plotting together, you don’t have to agree with whatever plots I suggest. You can very comfortably reject them and I am okay with that. Please don’t feel you have to agree to anything I suggest just to keep the peace. If you don’t want to do something, you don’t have to do it. Simple as.

If there is an issue you have with either me personally or something irp, tell me. I mean it. There is nothing wrong with approaching me if something is bothering you. I encourage it. I don’t like assuming the worst in people or jumping to the worst conclusions, so I will more often than not not assume anything is wrong unless I’m directly told that there is an issue. I am willing to make changes and accommodations so long as I’m made aware that they need to be made. Rping is supposed to be fun and if you’re not having fun, I want to be able to make it fun for both of us. I understand that that kind of thing can be anxiety-inducing and it might feel easier to just not say anything and keep it inside, but it will only end worse later on. If you need to take some time to figure out how to approach me, that’s completely fine and good. I understand. A good starting point is to say something along the lines of ‘hey, something’s been bugging me and I need to talk to you about it.’ Just a quick message that states the purpose very clearly so I can get in the right mindspace and either set aside time or properly prepare myself for the discussion. Neutral and factual statements or things that are framed as simple requests are the best way to go with me and I respond best to that. Clear, simple, and direct statements are what I appreciate. Get right to the point and explain what’s wrong and what I can do to mitigate it so we can work through it and come to an agreement.

Please do not wait if you have an issue with me. I know this can be hard to do, but it will be much better in the long run. If there is something genuinely bugging you, tell me as soon as you’re able and please don’t put it off. I will not be able to know if anything’s wrong unless you tell me, so please don’t put off telling me. The last thing I want is to find out months later about something that’s been upsetting you that could’ve been solved if I had known sooner. I don’t want to cause issues. I want to make things fun. I want to know how I can improve an rp experience with you.

Don’t try to vague or send me ‘hints’ in a way that’s not direct communication with me. I mean it. It is very easy for me to dismiss something as an ic thing or just not pick up on what you’re trying to hint at if it’s not obvious enough. Don’t send me asks about something on anonymous. Don’t passive-aggressively try and communicate with me ooc irp. Don’t vague post about me. Don’t vague me in tags. Don’t do any of that. Just come into my DMs and tell me what’s wrong. Not only is all of the above extremely rude, disrespectful, and dishonest, but it’s also completely unnecessary and ineffective. If you try and communicate with me through anything that isn’t a direct message, it will not work. I will not realize that that’s what’s happening and this will only lead to frustration and tension. If you have an issue with me, just come to me privately and tell me what’s wrong. This is much easier and takes way less time and is way less stressful.

Look, the world is already a difficult place for autistic people to navigate as is. Social norms and protocols were made by neurotypical people for neurotypical people and us autistic people are just expected to know them or intuitively pick them up even though we are physically incapable of doing that. I really don’t need people disregarding this basic need for open and direct communication making it even harder to exist as an autistic person in the world and having my needs treated like not being worth consideration.

I’m tired. I’m tired of having incidents explode because of things that could’ve been solved if I had just been told immediately and directly. I’m tired of not having my needs be taken seriously.

So please...if you are interested in rping with me and you need to know how to communicate with me in a way that I will respond well to, this is your guide. I cannot be any clearer than this. If incidents still happen despite this, then...well, I don’t know. I have to assume at that point that it’s done intentionally.

I hope this clears things up for some people and encourages people to be more open and up-front with me about things. I promise I am willing to work things out, but I can’t do that if I’m not made aware of those issues. I will be updating my rules page with an addendum about my autism and I will leave a link to this post on that page for easy access.

#ooc #psa #rp psa

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mlm-writer · 4 years

Text

Push and Pull (John Kennex x GN!Reader)

Pairing: John Kennex x Gender Neutral Reader Rating: PG-13 for swearing Words: 2143 Summary: John has been distant ever since you started dating. You’ve tried to endure it in the hopes of it getting better, but, unfortunately, communication seems necessary to solve problems. John does not like to talk about his feelings tho. Tags: Angst, relationship problems, hurt/comfort, insecurities, John’s puppy eyes, swearing, reference to violence, beta read at 2am, reader is thirsty af at one point but look at this man do we blame the reader?

“Professor.” You looked away from the screen you have been doing data analyses at. The last of your fellow forensic scientists stood at the door with her coat on. “I cleaned up as much as I could. Please don’t forget to go home yourself.” You smiled at her and reassured her you would go home before midnight. The look in her eyes made the same inquiry as most of your colleagues had, but she did not ask why you were working so much.

At this point you did not even write down the extra hours, afraid that some MX might kick you out by five if you did. Your notes started to get sloppy, but you felt like it was worth it when you heard a knock on the door. Without waiting for an answer, it opened and your boyfriend stepped inside. “Hey, have you eaten yet?” You shook your head and frantically opened the file with your notes.

“No, but I have some interesting findings about the samples from your case this morning.” It sent you down a rabbit hole of connecting dots and by the time you started mentally dozing off, you were so close to a breakthrough. Frustration filled your body as you tried to force your brain to have just one more useful thought.

A kiss landed on your temple. “Let’s continue tomorrow. I am tired and hungry.” You let out a sleepy chuckle as you closed up for today. You kept a professional distance from John as you both exited the building in silence and walked towards the car. The moment you sat down, you started napping for just those few minutes you knew it took to get to John’s favourite noodle place.

A soft shake woke you from your dreamless slumber. “Hey, you’ve been working too hard lately.” You scoffed and brushed it off. You knew, but you felt like John had been distancing himself ever since you two were officially a thing. Before that he was always more open and vulnerable around you than with other people, but now you felt like he was more open towards anyone but you. The only way to get him to let loose, was to work on a case with him, so you gave that little extra to spend more time with him as soon and as much as possible.

“You must be really tired. Usually, you chat the ears off my head.” You looked up from your bowl of steaming noodles and forced a smile on your face.

“Well, I guess working more makes me better company then,” you replied without thinking about it. You did not notice the shocked look on your boyfriend’s face, until he put a hand on your wrist.

“I like it when you chat my ears off my head, so get some more rest, ok? You don’t have to do everything on your own. Just let your colleagues help you more.” You pull your hand away, pouting as you continue eating.

The idea of someone else talking John through the evidence fuelled a jealousy that had been vestering in your chest for weeks now. “Take me home with you tomorrow.” John choked on his noodles. Heads turned towards him as he coughed and reached for his beer. He chugged half of it before looking at you again like he misheard you. “You heard me. We need to talk and I am too tired right now.”

John was quiet for a moment. The air was tense as you two ate. Your bowl was close to empty when you heard his voice again. “If you want to break up with me, you can just say it now.” His voice was small and if you were not so overworked, tired and frustrated, you would have hugged him and reassured him that you loved him so much and that breaking up was the opposite of what you wanted. However, you were overworked, tired and frustrated, so that was not happening.

You slammed your spoon into the bowl and stood up. “If you never wanted to be in a relationship with me in the first place, then you should just have said no when I asked you to be my boyfriend,” you gritted through your teeth to make as less of a scene as possible. “I’m gonna take a cab home.” Something inside you hoped he would come after you, like men did in movies, but your name stayed uncalled as you waited in the cold night air for a cab to pass you by.

The next day, your head was even less in the game. You kept making typos, to the point someone gently suggested you took a break. Their tone betrayed how foul your mood had been and you caved. It was getting better, until a familiar face joined you. “There you are, professor,” he said upon arrival, putting way too much emphasis on ‘professor’, “I was hoping you could fill me on your findings on yesterday’s evidence.” You did not like his tone at all. Your eyes almost rolled out of their sockets as you stood up and walked past him. He followed you to your desk, keeping more distance than he usually would.

“Here,” you hissed as you pushed the file folder into his hands, “your culprit is sprinkling Marigold pollen around like Hansel and Gretel. Dorian knows how to scan for it. You’ll have them by lunch.” You gave him a passive aggressive pat on the arm, before hopping off your desk and walking away. You caught a scrutinizing gaze from your boyfriend, but you pulled an uno reverse card on that. Maybe you were being immature, but you were convinced you had enough reason to.

If you were not still angry at John, you would’ve thought him dragging the suspect into the precinct before lunch was really hot. You still thought it was hot, but you were too angry to admit that to yourself. You bit the inside of your cheek when you saw him sit the suspect down by force, before turning the glass translucent, blurring the inside.

On the plus side, having a case finished so easily with little issues, put John in a good mood. You were calmed down as well by the time it was time to clock out. You got a message at two past five. It was from John, asking you to have Chinese take-out at his place tonight. You shot him a message back, something long enough to show him you were in a better mood than that morning.

While getting the food, it was easy to slip into conversation about the case he solved today. Work-talk turned into reminiscing, talking about people, laughing a little. However, when the door of his apartment closed behind you, it felt so cut-off from the rest of the world and the air between you became thick with the masks you both have the tendency to put on in public. Eating the food had gotten way more awkward than getting the food. With no one to convince you were two happily dating adults, there was uncertainty of how much you had to fool yourselves everything was fine.

Both of you knew there was need for serious talk, for heart-to-heart conversations about something other than work. “When the captain found out about us,” you started out of nowhere, because it had to start somehow, “she told me to be patient with you, because you had some bad experiences with your ex.” You could see tension growing in his shoulders. “John, we’ve been dating for three months now. Don’t you think it is time you tell me at least a little about your ex? I don’t need the details, but…”

“No.”

You had not even finished speaking. John was already standing up and gathering the dirty plates, turning his back towards you to toss them in the sink. “Why?” You put your hands on your hips, hoping for a very good answer.

“What happened with her is none of your business,” he grunted as he aggressively started putting everything in the dishwasher, not leaving everything to solidify for once.

“Well I think it is,” you replied, wanting for him to turn around, but you were not going to beg to see his face.

“And I think not. What does she have to do with you?”

You walked around the table and stood next to him. Your proximate forced him to at least give you a short glance. Your face was hard, but your voice was fraying at the edges. “Well maybe it will help me understand why you have been such a lousy boyfriend.” You did not mean that, but you felt like you did.

“I told you yesterday to not keep fucking around if you just want to break up with me,” he replied, not giving in to telling you anything.

“I do not want to break up with you, but if you’re just gonna prefer talking to anyone but me, what is the point of being in a relationship with you?” You tilted your head, trying to get a look at his face, but you flinched away as he tossed a glass back into the sink with unnecessary force. It was a surprisingly sturdy glass that did not shatter. You backed away, survival instinct winning. John never gave the vibe of someone who would hurt you. He may have been rough in the bedroom, but never angry and to be honest, angry John scared you.

You swallowed thickly, hoping he would say something, but instead he just tossed the towel lying on the counter across the room. You backed away further, tensing up at the frustrated growl he let out. You never had seen him like this. He was scarier now than when he was yelling at an MX, scarier than when he shot a suspect that returned to the crime scene, scarier than when he came back from the field with bruises and a suspect in a worse state than him.

“Just say it already,” he roared, “there is no point of being with me, so just end it!” Your heart hammered in your chest, but you heard his desperation. He seemed angry, but his voice betrayed the direction of his anger was not you, but himself.

“End it yourself if you want us to break up so bad,” you replied, sounding more angry than you meant to, voice raised in defence.

“I don’t want to!”

“Then what the fuck is your problem?”

“I’m scared!”

He looked up with horror on his face, seemingly shocked by his own words. “Goddammit, I’m a mess,” he nearly inaudibly muttered as he walked over to the couch with limp limbs. You crossed your arms, looking at him as you stayed in place. John was never keen on talking, but your silence forced him to. “My ex… she stabbed me in the back,” he admitted, but the sentence did not sound like it was finished.

“And now you’re scared I will too, so the moment we get together you get cold feet about how much you can trust me?” He did not nod or hum, but the defensive posture was confirmation enough. “Well… I passed the background check when I joined the force.” He let out a bitter chuckle, before looking at you. He held his hand out for you with puppy eyes you could not resist. You sighed and walked over. “I assume it was more than cheating?” You asked, trying to be direct without being overly specific. Your fingers touched his rough hand and he took a firm grasp of yours. He pulled, but let you sit down next to him on your own terms.

“Oh I wish she cheated,” he tried to joke, but his tone lacked humor. John’s thumb rubbed over your hands as you sat next to each other, distance between you, bridged by your intertwined hands. “It’s not easy to explain,” he said as his eyes stayed on the connection between you two, “but I will, someday.” He looked up to you with those same puppy eyes. “Just give me time, yeah?”

You sighed, hating yourself for being such a sucker for those eyes. “Just stop avoiding me at work. I’ve been working on your cases so you would talk to me.”

He laughed. “For real?” You felt a little stupid, but nodded anyway. “Oh.” He swallowed down another laugh. “Then I’ll try to talk to you more often, so go home earlier, sleep more and eat well.” He patted your head, a soft smile on his face.

“Hey, those are three things in exchange for one thing. I don’t think that’s fair.” You saw the edges of his mouth tug up against his will.

“Ok fine, what other demands do you have?” He questioned, humor returning.

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shepherds-of-haven · 4 years

Note

What would each ROs spirit animal be, and why?

Hi there, I’ve answered this before here, here, and here!

(However, it was recently brought to my attention by a kind person that use of the phrase “spirit animal” by non-Native people could be offensive or appropriating, so I won’t be using it anymore. I think guardian animal or patronus is better, so that’s what I’ll be using in my tags and whatnot from now on!)

I took this quiz for each of the ROs to see if their answers differed from what I’d put for them before, so here are their results:

Blade: Sable. Cool and confident - if not a little over-polished - sables are the most graceful of the herbivore personalities. With their outstanding physical presence and successful work ethic, they enjoy the universal admiration from colleagues and friends. Dapper in dress and noble in bearing, their tastes and lifestyle are refined and restrained and they disapprove of flashy or ostentatious behavior in any form.

Trouble: Zebra. Loyal and strong .Those that come into contact with the zebra find it to be a powerfully loyal and intelligent friend. Its black and white nature shuns the gray zones of compromise, and its decided idealism is incapable of accepting defeat in an argument. Zebras find it difficult to be punctual when it comes to meeting commitments that have little value to them, and close examination of this trait reveals the subtle arrogance that pervades the zebra's personality.

Tallys: Owl. A creature of great integrity, the owl’s quiet demeanor accords it an air of mystery and diffidence, and it is widely recognized as a serene, wise observer of human society. Always well-groomed, it is a noble individual with elegantly chiseled features that border on the fine edge of beauty and homeliness. Owls have developed quite a reputation for intelligence, but it's really their calm, insightful natures that give this impression. Instead of an intellectual approach to life, they employ their deeper spiritual senses to guide them and -- like their nocturnal cohorts the bats -- have a deeply philosophical bent. Owls are not without their assertive side, however, and won't hesitate to use their razor-sharp tongues to settle arguments.

Shery: Mole. Physically, moles are not awe-inspiring individuals. Their pale skin and plump physique are usually accompanied by thick glasses or contacts that compensate for poor eyesight. However, they are comfortable with their flaccid bodies and seek companionship with others who appreciate their more philosophical qualities. Passive and unassertive, they prefer to retreat at the first sign of confrontation and would rather run than take physical action. (Okay, this one seems meaner than the others?! Dead-on about the poor eyesight though gfdkjgfdlg??)

Riel: Penguin. Aggressive yet gentle, outgoing but shy, stable yet flighty - everyone sees the penguin in a different way. It's that black and white thing: the penguin only reveals the side that it wants to you to see. So whether you like this darling-devil or not, you have to concede that it's a fascinating and enigmatic individual. Penguins are birds condemned to live out their days on the ground. Unable to fly, their excess energy has no outlet save their creative talents and emotional outbursts. Penguins are poetic, artistic, and intellectually gifted, and as writers penguins have no equal. But, if unable to channel their impulses in a positive way, the resulting turmoil proves damaging to their relationships and careers. Penguins are deceptively intelligent and are particularly animated when intellectually challenged. They excel at word games and puzzles but are modest about their abilities and are generally underestimated by others.

Chase: Deer. Gorgeous yet capricious. This beautiful and delicate creature is a classic example of a prey species, and with few defenses other than its nimble mind and agile body it must be constantly on the lookout for danger. Deer are active and lithe creatures with little excess body fat, and enjoy and excel at most athletic pursuits. Their athleticism and grace may well create a fine first impression; it often masks a scatterbrained and emotionally taxing inner core. Best known for their highly-strung and skittish behavior, deer personalities are shy and demure. With a propensity to withdraw emotionally for fear of getting hurt, deer often struggle to settle down, and their motivations are certainly difficult to predict. Because their coquettish behavior is rooted in deeply buried insecurities, deer are drawn to the entertainment industry as actors and models, where -- by hiding behind the mask of characters --they find temporary refuge from the painful elements in their own lives.

Red: Fox. Astute and flirtatious. These agile-minded personalities are always active and -- although they never go out of their way to harm others -- have developed an unfair reputation for slyness and manipulation. Appealing, cerebral and of average size, the fox displays the typical canine qualities of loyalty, passion and creativity. Largely misunderstood to be a shy, retreating individual, it's the fox's stature as a small carnivore that defines its survival strategy. Because it cannot succeed using brute force alone, the fox must rely on its sharp mind and engaging personality to garner resources. Because it spends so much time in its head -- giving the impression that it's trying to outsmart everyone – the fox isn’t surprised that others find its intellectual pursuits quite intimidating (and often annoying). Foxes are fussy eaters and, with an appreciation for the finer things in life, demand quality in entertainment, food, and friends. Their love of exploration dovetails with their passion for overcoming challenges, which is why foxes are often found mountain climbing or journeying to exotic, forbidden places.

Ayla: Crocodile. Crocodiles are lean, leathery individuals with air of wariness that comes from living on the edge, which is why their skins are often decorated with scars or tattoos. Crocodiles are not always easy to identify because their survival strategy is based on misdirection and camouflage. As natural predators, crocs will attack without subtlety or intelligence and use any weapon at their disposal.Crocodiles prefer docile prey and will not hesitate to employ dirty tricks to gain an advantage. They have little sense of honor and, the more unwary their victim, the better. Crocs have little conscience, compassion, or guiding philosophy except that of survival and self-interest.

Briony: Wolf. The rugged wolf is athletic, good-looking and brimming with self-confidence. A close relative of the domestic dog, it is stronger and more aggressive, managing to generate notoriety wherever it marks its territory. The wolf's dark reputation is mainly due to jealousy of its consistent success in work and romance. With an innate understanding of the value of teamwork, it’s always ready to take its place in the chain of command either as leader or as simply a member of the pack. When a wolf decides to innovate, it makes sure that it has the backing of a capable team, for the wolf is clear-headed and strong-minded, and always willing to compromise in the interests of getting a job done. Wolves are facially expressive and readily communicate their emotional states with body language. They work hard at developing their social relationships, although -- unlike their cousin the dog -- they are quick to anger when they sense threats to the social order. When confrontations occur, they sometimes react suddenly and violently, barking displeasure at offending subordinates. Close companions know to avoid their biting tongue until they resume their normal gregarious behavior.

Lavinet: Dolphin. Dolphins are those tanned, beautiful people who populate background scenes in shows like Baywatch, and somehow remain annoyingly healthy while eating and drinking with abandon. You’ll rarely encounter an overweight dolphin.Perhaps it's their active lifestyles that keep them so trim, but their good genes have something to do with it too, for even though many dolphins subsist on junk food, their hair is shiny and their skin always glossy. Though the dolphin’s large brain is capable of solving almost any problem, its reputation for intelligence is overrated, for dolphins place little value in cerebral pursuits and avoid mental challenges. They are nonetheless able to hold their own in debates, but prefer cavorting and surfing to discussing weighty philosophical issues. Dolphins demand little from life other than the time to enjoy it. As highly sexual individuals, they spend a great deal of time in the pursuit of bodily pleasure, and their aggressive quest for sex sometimes dominates social interactions. Dolphins are not designed for manual labor. Their bodies lack the skilled hand-eye coordination found in land mammal personalities, but their intelligence and social abilities bestow the special advantage in people-oriented careers.

What do you think? Some of these are fairly accurate, but the others...

If you take one for your MC, the results tell you which animals are compatible to your own!

#Shepherds of Haven #guardian animal #animal #animal in you #romance options #redirect #anon

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