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#i got some usable screen recordings last night from the replay but then i was too tired n then i spent fathers day with my dad today
love4hobi · 3 years
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paradisobound · 5 years
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Starstruck
Summary: Phil attends all of Dan Howell’s concerts. In fact, he makes it a rule to even record every one he goes to. You could say he was in love with Dan Howell and in fact, that wouldn’t be a lie because he’s actually Dan’s fiancé. Too bad Dan’s fans see him as the creepy guy at Dan’s concerts. 
Warnings: A brief mention of sex but not explicit. 
Word Count: 3.6k 
Genre: Famous singer!Dan and present!phil 
A/N: I thought of this fic after finding out Sophie Turner attends a lot of the Jonas Brother’s Concerts because of Joe and I thought it would be cute to write a fic with a slightly different side! Happy reading :) 
**Read on Ao3**
“Dan Howell we love you!” 
“Dan! Dan! Dan!” 
Phil groaned as looked through the screen of his phone at the video recording of his fiancé up on stage. That was one thing Dan did make Phil promise to do if Phil was going to be attending every concert on his tour: record each show. 
So, Phil, being the best fiancé he could be, made a bunch of storage onto an old iPhone he found laying around their flat and proceeded to record and attend each show on Dan’s United States Tour. Tonight, they were in some place called Buffalo and Phil couldn’t really make out what was even going on here besides the fact that Canada and Niagara Falls was literally on the other side of the city. 
It was night 13 and although Phil knew Dan would never admit it, Dan was tired. Phil could tell on the screen as his body lagged a bit more than it did in rehearsals and his singing was a bit off key. Not like any of the screaming girls and boys could tell the difference but Phil had been to enough rehearsals and shows to tell with Dan was struggling a bit with his energy. 
But, it was the last song before the encore. Phil’s phone battery was struggling to hold on and his arm was getting a bit tired holding it as steady as he could for Dan’s big ‘project’ that he wants the footage for. 
“Remember that the footage has to be usable, Phil. That means I don’t want your shaky arm trying to focus on me.” 
Phil laughed in his head as he replayed Dan’s words to him the night Phil told him he was attending each show and Dan told him about his master plans—which were also a secret…to Phil anyway. Phil hadn’t pushed the matter when Dan had made it clear he didn’t want to tell anyone his plan so Phil had just went along with it. Although he does in a way wish he could know why he’s getting an arm ache every night. 
The music to Dan’s final song cuts out and everyone starts cheering. Dan’s smiling, Phil’s smiling back, knowing Dan can’t see him but he can feel it, and everything has gone perfectly once again for another night. 
Dan walks off the stage and the band continues to play and Phil sees a few people begin to trickle out from the corner of his eye but he just shrugs it off as people wanting to leave early or wanting to beat the crowd. He tries not to feel a little bit hurt when he sees some people leave the show early even though an irrational part of his brain wants people to stay and see what his fiancé is doing on the stage. 
Its radio silent in the stadium. Phil is still shocked that Dan managed to sell out a nearly 40,000 person stadium but he has. Just as people look defeated and ready to leave, Dan comes back out in an entirely new outfit and the whistles and cheers begin again. 
Dan’s final two songs are Phil’s favorite. But that’s honestly because they’re about him. If people didn’t know the meaning of Dan’s songs, they would think they were about a childhood love or even a teenage love that blossomed into more. They wouldn’t know that they, quite literally, told the world about his and Phil’s long-term relationship. 
As Dan belted out the lyrics about blue eyes and raven hair, Phil felt the hair on his arm prickle up a bit and goosebumps form. He always gets chills. He remembers when Dan first wrote the pieces and read the lyrics to Phil. Phil had cried so hard and just held Dan close as Dan just giggled and kissed his cheek. 
“Why are you crying?” 
“Because they’re beautiful, Dan.” 
“Yeah, well, you’re just as beautiful too.” 
It was cheesy. Of course it was. But in the words of another Dan lyric, “it was meant to be cheesy”. 
Just as Phil’s phone gives the final battery warning, Dan’s set finally ends and a shower of sparks sprays up as confetti falls all over the floor. Phil reached out and caught a few pieces himself and pocketed them in his jean jacket. He was saving those for his own special surprise. 
Dan left the stage and the lights slowly turned on and Phil waited for the mass crowd of girls around him to dissipate before he snuck around to the stage entrance and visited Dan in the dressing room. 
Dan’s security guards knew him by face so he didn’t have to say anything when he walked behind the stage and ended up by a door that he opened to a long hallway. When he got the dressing room and saw Dan’s name on the door, he knocked once and pressed it open. 
“Hey!” 
Phil shut the door behind him as he walked in to Dan sprawled out on the couch, his arms flopped down by his side. “You did amazing tonight.”
Dan turned his head and smiled at him, his face red and a bit sweaty, his make up a bit melted. “You’d say that even if I fucked up every song.” 
Phil walked over and sat down on the other end of the couch. Dan immediately sat up and scooted towards Phil before flopping into his chest and relaxing. Phil wrapped his arm around Dan’s upper body and pulled him close, bending down and kissing the top of his head. 
Just as Dan’s body relaxed a bit further and Phil felt the rest of his muscles tense, the door opened and Dan’s manager walked in, her phone in head. “We’re going to have to leave within the hour to get on the road towards Pittsburgh.” 
Dan just nodded and smiled at her as he pulled away from Phil and stretched. He was still fully in his costume—well, it was an outfit but it was pretty costume-like too in Phil’s opinion but the sparkles and glitter sequins on the black leather covering Dan’s arms. 
“You should get dressed,” Phil says turning to Dan. “Tonight is going to be a tour bus night and I don’t feel like having you complain the entire time that your jeans are too constricting.”
Dan scoffed and reached out, slapping his arm. “That was once and you had no problem helping me get the jeans off so I don’t want to hear you complain, you twat.” 
Phil just giggled and leaned over, capturing Dan’s lips in a quick kiss. He still gets butterflies in his chest when he kisses Dan and he loves that. He loves that Dan still has the same affect on him as he did when they were teenagers, meeting for the first time in a bar in Manchester. Dan was singing for a cover band and Phil was just a lonely college student looking to have a few drinks. 
It was really like fate that they actually took each other to bed that same night but then both simultaneously decided that being together only once wasn’t going to cut it and nearly ten years and one proposal later, here they were. Phil supporting Dan on tour as Phil works from his laptop for the BBC. 
“Maybe if you’re good we can celebrate in the hotel room tomorrow night,” Dan whispers before pressing another kiss to Phil’s lips. Phil just smiles into it and kisses back one more time for good measure. 
“Hm…maybe.” 
Dan shoves Phil back with a laugh as he finally stands up and makes his way over to his suitcase in the corner that was filled with all of his stuff. Phil watched as he took off his outfit and hung it on a hanger for the crew to grab later and then put on a pair of sweatpants and Phil’s baggy York University sweatshirt. 
Phil gave that to Dan when they first started dating so when Dan went back home at night, he would still have Phil with him. Now, Phil would love to have that hoodie back but Dan quite literally growls when Phil even makes that suggestion so he lets Dan have it now. 
They grab the rest of Dan’s stuff and then make their way out the back to their tour bus and get inside with minimal people around…thankfully. They take a seat on one of the couches on the side and Dan curls up onto Phil just as Phil wraps his arms around him once more. 
They’ll go to the bedroom soon where they’ll sleep but for right now, they were just going to sit and relax for the ride. 
***
Something surprising happens when Phil wakes up the next morning, a bit disoriented as he realizes he’s on the moving bus. He checks his phone and goes on Twitter and sees that ‘Daniel Howell Live’ is still trending on Twitter. He curiously checks the hashtag because hey, if he can find some good video and good photos for PR, he’ll have Dan’s manager ask the people for permission to use them. So he scrolls a bit and he scrolls a bit more and suddenly there is a photo of him, stood at his seat, recording the show. 
Has anyone else noticed this guy is at every show??? What does a middle aged man go to all of Dan’s shows?? That’s creepy. 
After that tweet, there was a thread and apparently there was a photo of him taken at every show and he legit didn’t know about it. He, in fact, had zero idea anyone was taking his photo and he genuinely was a bit freaked out by it. 
He read a few more tweets. 
He’s been at every show I’ve gone to! I’ve noticed him! Maybe he’s a stalker of Dan…how gross. Dan’s not gay. 
Phil had to scoff at that, loud enough that Dan turned over in his sleep and settled his weight into Phil’s chest, knocking his phone slightly out of the way so his head could rest there. “What are you laughing at?” Dan asked, his sleepy voice so slurred Phil could hardly understand what he was talking about. 
“Just some tweet I read saying you weren’t gay.” 
Dan snorted and reached up, making grabby hands for Phil’s phone so Phil handed it over and Dan sat up a bit and looked at the tweets. “These are actually kind of laughable.” 
“I know.” 
“They think you’re my stalker.” Dan laughed. “Who even pays attention to whether or not someone is at a show every night?” 
Phil shrugged because he genuinely didn’t know either. 
Phil knew that fans speculated about Dan’s sexuality though. Really, it’s been a source of talk ever since Dan’s first big break a few years back when he opened up for Taylor Swift on her European Tour. But Phil also knows that Dan has made it completely clear that he wants to keep his sexuality and his relationship with Phil only for private. And Phil completely gets that. 
They’ve been out since they started dating to close friends and family. Phil’s been out to everyone he’s known since university. But Dan has always had a bit more trouble accepting his sexuality and for that, Phil understands Dan’s hesitation when he says he’s not ready to share that side of his life yet. 
But Phil loves Dan more than anything else. He loves his smile, his dimples, his laugh, and the way he insults him when they’re being silly. But he also loves the side of Dan no one sees. The side where sex and love and intimacy is involved. He even let a selfish part of himself think about that while they were in bed together the other night. A part of him that when he fucked into Dan, he thought about how no one else knew this side of Dan: this was the side that only Phil got to see. 
“Hm…” Dan says, breaking Phil’s thoughts. “It’s quite amusing to me that so many fans are so adamant to say I’m straight. Like, I think it’s actually quite obvious that I’m gay in the same way that I know it’s obvious I like dick but…” 
Phil squeaked and pushed a hand over Dan’s mouth to get him to stop that thought right there and Dan just opened his lips and licked a fat stripe over Phil’s palm that had Phil cringing and pulling his hand away. 
“You’re easy to break, ya know.” Dan says, laying his head on Phil’s chest so he can look up him. His big brown doe eyes were like pools that Phil could get lost in. 
“It’s because I love you too much.” 
Dan kisses Phil’s chest. “Mm…love you too.” 
They get off from the bus not long after to check into their hotel and put their suitcases in their room. Afterwards, it was straight to the venue to prepare and do the soundcheck and Phil was going to walk around and explore Pittsburgh a bit more, seeing as he’s never been before. 
That night, he ends up in the same floor pit that he was in the night before, like he always is, with his phone fully charged and ready to go. He sends Dan a quick ‘good luck, i love you so much’ message before he puts his phone away and takes out the one to record. 
The show goes smoothly and everyone is happy and the night ends the same way with Phil retreating back and visiting Dan just as Dan is getting out of his costume. He leaves with Dan to go to the hotel and when they get back into the room, he goes on Twitter again and happens to see the same thread but with new photos of him. 
The man was at Pittsburgh too!! Does @danielhowell know he has a stalker?? Should we contact the police? 
Phil rolled his eyes and showed Dan the tweets to which Dan replied with an eye roll and a “for fucks sake!” before he flopped onto the bed and rolled towards Phil to snuggle. 
“Gonna have to get security after me apparently,” Phil playfully jokes. 
Dan swings his leg over Phil’s hip and sits flush on his hips as he leans down and kisses Phil soundly on the mouth. “Maybe so.” He whispers with a smirk, placing his hand on Phil’s jaw. “Maybe I’ll have to tell security that a hot guy has been chasing after me since my uni days and he follows me to all of my concerts and he also happens to be my fiancé who is fucking great in bed and…yeah, I’d really like to continue the great in bed part right about now.” 
So after a quick round of sex that left them both breathless, Phil fell asleep with the thoughts in his mind about what they were supposed to do. Dan had a two day break before his show in Albany so he hopes by then maybe everyone will forget about him. 
But somehow, he fears they won’t. 
***
Dan flubs up on accident in Albany. 
Phil doesn’t realize what he’s done until the young girl sitting next to him on the floor is pointing out the silver band on Dan’s ring finger. 
It’s his engagement ring and as soon as Phil sees it, his heart stops a bit in his chest because he knows Dan is gonna have to answer for this. He’s going to have to answer for why he suddenly is wearing a ring on that finger when he never did before…well, in the public eye anyway. 
Phil proposed to Dan over three years prior but they both agreed on not planning any of their wedding until Dan’s done with his United States tour. Phil was completely fine with that but Dan wore his ring all of the time when it was just them or he was going out with friends. 
He normally keeps it safe on the bus or in the safe in the hotel room but he must have forgotten to take it off. 
And fuck other people are pointing now and he hopes to God Dan cannot notice what is happening. 
At the end of the show, Phil practically runs to Dan’s dressing room where Dan is crying softly on the couch, his face scrunched up as he struggles to hold in the tears of guilt and frustration that he can read so clearly on Dan’s face. He runs over to him and gathers him tight as Dan lets them go and apologizes to Phil for wearing it. 
“I forgot I had it on.” Dan said through strangled tears. 
“It’s okay.” 
“But it’s not!” Dan cried. “Oh my God I’ve fucked up so bad.” 
And while that turned out to not be entirely true, Phil did reassure him as much as possible that everything was going to be okay. 
***
The tabloids talk about it first. 
Dan Howell Spotted With Mystery Ring on Left Hand in Albany Show. 
That seemed to be the headline written everywhere like a slap across the face. 
All of the fangirls were crying. What women is he secretly married to? What is that ring? When did this all happen? How could this all happen? 
Phil felt like he had whiplash reading all of the comments. 
“We’re going to have to address this,” Phil says softly. 
“I know.” 
They’re sat in a hotel in Boston now, waiting for the show to begin in a few hours. They had snuck away for a private talk and everyone had let them go. They needed to discuss this, no matter how hard it could be. 
“I know you don’t want to out us…” 
“No,” Dan says, biting his lip. “I…I think I have to.” 
“You don’t have to,” Phil says. “You could always say you want to be private and…” 
“How long is that privacy really going to last, Phil?” Dan asked, his voice defeated. “Is it going to last for a year or only for an hour? People are already commenting about you and you’ve done nothing…maybe we should just come out.” 
“If that’s what you want.” 
Dan bites his lip and bit harder and then looks Phil in the eyes as he nods. “It’s what I want.” 
“Okay,” Phil says, leaning in for a kiss. “It’s what I want too.” 
Phil wanted whatever was best for Dan and if this was best, then he wanted to go along with it. 
They made their way back to the stadium and Phil opted for standing off the side of the stage instead of in the audience, just in case. He’d seen some of Dan’s earlier shows this way but never once has he seen him play such a sold out show from the sidelines. 
They concert begins as normal and Phil notices that Dan is wearing his ring again, not taking it off and he feels his heart flutter a bit. Dan does his normal songs and routines and then before they know it, the encore is starting. 
But right before it does, Dan asks if the audience can get quiet for a moment. 
“As many of you all know,” he begins into his microphone. “The next few songs I have written are about someone very special in my life. I’ve been hiding them from you for a very long time now and I really just…don’t want to anymore. They’re such a massive part of who I am today and who I will be in the future and I don’t want to continue hiding them anymore. And it’s not fair to you guys either. 
Suddenly Dan turns to where Phil is standing and Phil feels his heart give out a bit. Dan motions for Phil to walk out and Phil looks down at his black Vibes shirt and ripped jeans and feels like he’s not properly addressed for this but he starts walking out anyway and there are suddenly cheers and yells and Phil doesn’t know what’s happening. 
“Everyone, meet my fiancé Phil.” Dan says, taking Phil’s hand and standing close to him. “You all have been talking about him quite a bit online so here is my apparent stalker who is actually just my fiancé and partner for the last 1o years.” 
Dan leans over and kisses Phil on the cheek and Phil feels a bit flush at all of this. Like he doesn’t know what’s happening anymore but he also doesn’t entirely mind it. 
“Okay, now get off the stage you dork. You’re stealing my show.” 
Dan turns to Phil and wraps a hug around him and Phil hugs him back, holding him close as he kisses Dan’s neck once and lets him go, lingering their hands touching for a bit too long as he disembarks down the stage with Dan’s security guard and stands in the audience once again, looking up at Dan with all of the love in the world. 
Social media went crazy that night, but really Phil didn’t mind. He went to the rest of the shows as promised and recorded all of them too. At the end of the tour, he finally asked Dan what the footage was for and Dan finally told him. 
“It’s for our wedding.” He says, not adding anything more. 
Phil just holds him tight and kisses his cheek some more. 
Life is going to be a bit hectic for a while, but at least he won’t be seen as the stalker fan anymore, and now he’ll be treated as Dan’s fiancé: a title he is more than proud to have. 
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