#i guess I'm worrying about the future and i should leave that for the future | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

obaex · 1 year

Text

better start practicing - rafe cameron

summary: you see a soft and unexpected side of rafe, leading you both to confess your true feelings about the future.

word count: 1k

___

The barbeque was in full swing as Rafe guided you by the hand through friends and family alike on the back porch of Tanneyhill. You were more or less a permanent fixture at the Cameron's at this point, but this was the first time you had gotten to meet Rafe's extended family and it felt like a significant step forward in your relationship. Plus, you got to see another side of him that was so sweet and soft, drinking in the familial affection he didn't get on a regular basis from doting aunts and proud uncles. He glowed, even through pinched cheeks and endless heckling about you: "Rafe Cameron, pictures simply do not do this pretty girl justice. How did you get so lucky? You take good care of her, you hear?" You were both drinking in the compliments and love, such a welcome divergence from the usually dark and critical pallor that Ward cast on Tanneyhill.

After awhile you had gotten separated from Rafe when one of his uncles pulled him aside to talk. Wanting to give him time to catch up with everyone, you wandered over to Sarah and your friends. Despite the distance between you, you could feel Rafe's eyes tracking you wherever you went, and when you finally caught his eye, he grinned goofily at you and winked before he was distracted by something at his feet.

You couldn't see what it was, but you saw him quickly set his beer down and lean over before standing back up with his youngest cousin, Leyla, in his arms. She was only three years old and you could tell that the long day of playing with her cousins had worn her out. You could see Rafe say something sweetly to her, causing her to smile as he brushed her hair out of her face and she snuggled into his shoulder, wrapping her arms around his neck. He rubbed her back gently before picking up his beer and resuming his conversation, like toting this little girl around and letting her fall asleep on him was the most natural thing in the world.

You could have died on the spot. You could have melted into the floor and washed away with the tide at the sight of the strong, fierce, indefensible Rafe Cameron cradling a little girl in his arms. All you could think to yourself is that you hoped you were looking at a glimpse of your future, on another porch, in another house with the same man snuggling your sweet daughter in his arms. You don't know how long you stood there, drinking in the sight that was tugging at your heart before Rafe's aunt came by, gently taking his sleeping cousin out of his arms. You took that as your cue and made your way over to him.

"Rafe, can I borrow you for a minute?" you asked, trying to tone down the urgency in your voice. He knew you too well, though, his brow furrowing, "Absolutely, beautiful, is everything okay?" he asked, following you as you tugged him by the hand around to the front of the house, away from prying eyes. "Babe, you're worrying me, what's wrong?" he asked again. You took his hands in yours, taking a cautionary glance around to be sure you were alone before passionately pressing your lips to his, your hands coming up to cup his face, your body pressing into his. "Mmpf!" he replied as you caught him off guard, pressing him into the siding of the house. He tossed his beer into the bushes, long forgotten, as he wrapped his arms around you. Your kisses grew more heated as you slipped your tongue into his mouth. He tasted like the IPA he had been drinking and you couldn't get enough as he matched you kiss for kiss, stroke for stroke, before smiling and breaking away briefly enough to say jokingly, "I guess I should leave you with my Aunt Linda more often? Where is this coming from? Not that I'm complaining in the slightest" he said with a smirk.

You began kissing him again, attempting to explain between the crashes of your lips.

"You" kiss "are the sweetest" kiss "most gentle, loving man" kiss "and" kiss "one day" kiss "you are going to be an amazing father."

At that, he pulled away to look at you, a confused look on his face, scanning yours for any hint of a joke. You knew those words held weight for him. He clearly didn't have a good father figure and he was insecure about what that meant for him as a father, for his children, for his future.

"I saw you with Leyla" you explained. "You're a natural, you are such a giver and a lover. You have a heart of pure gold, Rafe Cameron, despite what you want the world to see. You are going to be the best damn father our babies could ever hope for."

"Our babies?" he said smiling. He was grinning ear to ear at that.

Shit. You had let slip the fantasy you had been playing in your head of Rafe as the father of your children. You had both talked casually about getting married, about having a family. You knew you both wanted that at some point, but you had never said anything this serious before.

"Babies, you know, in general --" you tried to walk your words back, afraid at what his reaction would be before he interrupted you.

"Nuh-uh, don't even try that, pretty girl, I heard you loud and clear: our babies," he said, his hands cupping your face. "You want to have my babies?" he was smiling and he let out a small, earnest laugh. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He had dreamt of that future with you, but didn't want to cling to something he thought was too good to be true.

You pursed your lips, trying to hide your smile as you nodded earnestly.

"WOO!" Rafe shouted, the joy of the moment and the realization that you wanted the same thing, that you trusted him, that you believed in him, that you were going to make his dreams come true overwhelming him. You were giggling at his reaction when he hoisted you over his shoulder, firefighter style.

"Rafe!" you shouted, surprised, amidst peals of laughter, "What are you doing!? Where are we going!?"

"Better start practicing" he said, carrying you inside.

#rafe cameron #obx rafe cameron #outerbanks rafe #rafe obx #rafe outer banks #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe imagine #rafe fanfiction #rafe x you

2K notes · View notes

darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 3 months

Text

Dirty Work 21

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as bullying, familial discord/abuse, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You start a new gig and find one of your clients to be hard to please.

Characters: Loki

Note: have a wonderful day!

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

The gate bell buzzes and you rush from the kitchen to answer, the porcelain clinking as you leave it in the sink. You flit into the hall and to the entryway. As you pull the door open, you sense a shadow and turn to see Laufeyson at the top of the stairs. He watches but does not speak. You waver before you find the strength to continue on.

You shut the door gently and try to breathe through your rattling nerves. You don't understand what's going on. The words Laufeyson said still don't make sense to you. He can't mean what you think. You have to be overthinking. Yet the tickle of his touch remains on your skin and fuels your doubts.

How can you say no to him? If you do, he might say the same...

You repress a shudder as you reach the gate and hold the button to roll it back. Ronan steers through in his truck, pulling in just behind Laufeyson's flashy ivory car. You let the gate close and approach the truck bed as the carpenter climbs out.

"Miss," he opens the rear door to grab his bag, "you look nice, special occasion?"

You look down at yourself and wipe your sweaty palms on your skirt. It's sunny but it isn't the weather that has you fired up. You force a smile that makes your cheeks twitch.

"Uh, no, they're just...new," you sway as you push your hands behind you, "erm, so I guess... you should get started."

"I should," he checks his watch, a thick leather band with a tarnish face, "I hate to get in the way of your work. Or ruin your fancy clothes."

"Oh, uh, it's not... I'll bring you some water," you offer.

"Hmm," he hums as he shuts the door, "you're too kind for your own good. Nice to see you doing something for yourself for a change."

"I..." you swallow the truth. "Thanks."

"Not that you didn't look good before," he insists.

"Well, I..." you murmur, looking away bashfully.

"I'm talking a lot," he chuckles, "you know where I'll be."

He turns and stalks off towards the house. You blow out a breath as your eyes are drawn to the front door. Mr. Laufeyson stands in the frame, again observing you, his gaze narrowed to slits. He reminds you of a snake in coil about to strike.

The door shuts before you can reach it. You enter and he's gone. It's like some game. You return to the kitchen to finish tidying up the porcelain from tea. You set it away in the glass cabinet and fill a fresh jug of water. As you place it on the patio, Frigga pops her head up from the roses, a healthy bouquet in hand as she snips the stems with a pair of cutters.

"These will be nice in the dining room," she suggests as she shows the white petals, "Maybe a few for the study?"

"Uh, yeah," you plunk down the pitcher and glass. "Did you need any water? This is for the carpenter."

"Oh, he's here?" She says, "I didn't see him. Perhaps I can ask him about the flower boxes."

"Yeah, uh, maybe," you agree, "I'll be, er, upstairs working. Got a lot to catch up on from yesterday."

"No worries at all, darling," she assures you.

You retreat and stumble to get your shoes off once more, mindful of the rules. That's the problem. Everyone is forgetting the rules. Ronan does the gazebo not the flower boxes, you don't wear your shoes in the house, and Loki-- Mr. Laufeyson is just your boss.

You rush up the stairs, nearly too at a time, and reach the top out of breath. You hurry into the library and close yourself up inside. It's just you. It strikes you how much you missed being alone. These last few weeks have felt so crowded. Constricted even.

You finally make yourself sit still. You find it hard not to wriggle in the seat as you watch the laptop screen load. It feels so long ago that you did this. It's all backwards and you don't like it. You like clear lines. You are separate from Mr. Laufeyson. You are below. You have your tasks and he has more important concerns.

You focus on balancing his bills. There are a lot of outstanding invoices. You're still learning how to keep it all organized. You feel a bit out of your depth with all the numbers but you excelled at math all those years before.

A subtle click barely registers but nestles in your ear. You squint at the screen as you watch a tutorial on Excel functions. You're still figuring that out too.

"The carpenter has been dealt with?" Mr. Laufeyson states as much as he asks.

"Yes, Mr. Laufeyson," you confirm and pause the video. You glance behind him at the open door to his study.

"Very good," he says, "he will work faster without distraction."

You nod. You take his point. He is right. It might be better that the project is finished sooner than later. There's a big enough mess, the type you don't know how to clean up.

He strides around the library, perusing the shelves as if they are new to him. He feels along the spines of books and drags his fingers along the wood. You watch him, waiting. For what, you don't know.

"Don't let me distract you," he says without looking at you as he slides out a volume. "As you were."

Your eyes flick down obediently. You try to refocus but forget where you were. You open the ledger to make notes as you restart the video. You can sense him lurking around the room, closer and closer as his silhouette blurs the edge of your vision.

The narrator continues their instruction as you open the transcript to follow along. Mr. Laufeyson inches closer and closer, walking just behind your laptop, then around one side of your desk before doubling back. Again, he looms behind the screen and strolls along the other side. And at once, he's behind you.

You tense as you feel him watching over your head. You keep your hand moving as you take notes, writing down words you don't process. Your pulse thrums in your temples as you feel him leaning over you. His hands rest on your shoulders and he kneads them as you sit frozen.

He bends further and further until you feel his breath on your crown. He nuzzles your hair as his hands trail slowly across your shoulders. They close loosely around your neck as he exhales with a groan. Just like the one you heard earlier.

You gulp against his grip as your pen stills and you stare blankly at the screen, the narrator hazing to a drone and the colours fogging together. You drop the pen and drag your hand up to touch his. He tuts as he lowers his head next to yours, his lips brushing your ear as he speaks.

"I didn't say stop," he slithers as heat scalds over you.

You shiver and remove your hand from his, reaching for the pen instead. You pick it up, trembling as you try to read your own writing, your chin pressing to his knuckle as he tightens his hold on you. It's just scribbles, broken lines and squiggled waves.

"Notice too, you did not either," he whispers against the shell of your ear and draws away, all once releasing you.

You gasp as he swiftly side steps and strides across the room. He retrieves the volume from the shelf and reclines across the chaise, lazily opening the pages with a sigh. You stare at him as he lingers, engrossing himself in the book as you forget all about the spreadsheets and negative balances.

👠

Mr. Laufeyson leaves without a word. A taunt in its own right. He’s toying with you impeccably. His every move, his every glance, even something as careless as breathing is a statement. He’s watching. He’s waiting. For something…

Your frustration boils over and you snap shut the lid of the laptop. You haven’t been able to focus since his intrusion. The weight of his hands on your throat remains even with him gone. At moments, it feels as if you are truly being strangled.

You get up and resign yourself to something less complicated. You near the door and stop to peek at the one attached to the study. It’s open still but you wouldn’t think to peer through it. Is he there still? Listening? Expecting something?

You go into the hall and descend, each step expecting Laufeyson to call you back, to reproach you for straying. You reach the bottom without obstacle and exhale. You hear noise in the kitchen and follow it.

Frigga is there, placing a rectangle tray on the counter. She is comfortable as she moves around lightly. She knows where everything is as she arranges her ingredients and tools. You admire her. You wish you had that confidence, especially now as you drown in uncertainty.

“Oh, darling, wonderful timing,” she praises as she looks up, “I thought to do some cooking before I go. I’m sure you know Loki is rather avoidant of doing so himself. Why don’t you join, hm?”

You blink and hesitate, glancing over your shoulder. It isn’t exactly work.

“Don’t you fret for him, if he has issue, I will take it up with him,” she dismisses your unspoken doubts. “Come, come, I want to share with you my best recipes.”

“Okay,” you cross to her. She is undeniable, besides, you don’t think Laufeyson would be pleased to hear if you were to reject his mother.

“Beer-marinated pork,” she announces, “roasted turnip and some hand-made bread, of course.”

You nod and twiddle your fingers. You’ve never had beer-marinated anything. Well, your culinary experience is lacking.

“Family recipes,” she explains, “adapted over the years. There was a time the bread was baked on rocks and the turnip would be roasted over embers. Imagine.”

She trills and spins around, gathering more supplies for her growing array. As she faces the counter again, she sighs.

“I much rather prefer the modern methods, of course. Not so tedious and Loki has ensured the best,” she goes to the stacked ovens embedded in the wall and sets the temperature, leaving the upper one to preheat. “A pity, such a nice kitchen and it’s barely used. That cook of his… she doesn’t know our recipes.”

You listen, too anxious to summon any sort of comment. She doesn’t seem to notice as she carries the conversation smoothly.

“Do you cook? You must,” she answers her own question, “we will make enough for you to take home for your father. If he can’t stomach beer, I can make a sauce.”

“Oh, that’s… that’s okay–”

“I insist,” she overrides you, “it’s a labour of love for me. I love cooking. That is the one thing Sif– his ex-wife wasn’t fond of. She was always at the stable.”

You nod, trying to unravel the story from the stray threads. Little by little, you learn more of the woman who used to live here. In your head, she is sophisticated and splendid. And the way the speak of her, they seem to mourn her as much as you do your own mother.

“We will need onion and some spices, we’ll mix it in with the beer for our marinade,” she instructs, “a bowl…” she turns to take a silver bowl from the nested stack.

She puts it before you and directs you. She stands back as she lets you do it yourself. It’s nice to have the simple tasks set out one by one, even if it feels as if she’s judging your every move. You submerge the pork chops to marinate and she turns your attention to the turnip.

“Be careful chopping, turnips can be difficult,” she girds.

You shy away from the large knife and the hard rutabaga. It’s not easy to saw through as you rock the knife this way and that. You only get halfway through before the blade sticks immovably.

“Allow me,” she takes over and with a jerk, finishes the chop. The turnip splits in two as the knife meets the thick cutting board. “A bit of elbow grease…”

“Mother, what are you up to?” Laufeyson enters with a hand in one pocket.

“Oh, you know, dear, I can’t leave you without dinner.”

“I have a cook,” he counters.

“Mmm, yes, but nothing like a homemade meal,” she tisks.

He looks at you as he nears. You wipe your hands on a dish cloth and wring it tight. Frigga continues on unbothered, turning one half of the turnip on its flat side and chopping it into chunks.

“She’s helping,” she says, “please don’t take her from me.”

“I didn’t say anything,” he shrugs, his lips slightly curving.

“You were thinking it,” she huffs, “she can take some time to cook. Perhaps, she should do so regularly. It would save you money.”

“But not time. She has other tasks.”

“You being the most onerous,” Frigga chirps as she transfers the chunks into the pan.

“Perhaps,” he does not look away from you as you twist the dish cloth to its limit. He slips his hand from his pocket and lets it brush up his shirt, “I am what you raised me to be.”

“I was saying to the darling earlier,” she ignores his snipe, “the next time you visit, you might bring her along.”

“Eh, next time…” Laufeyson swallows as his lips fall straight, “maybe…”

“You are going to visit, aren’t you?” Frigga whines, “you and your father, I don’t know why you just can’t get along.”

“I tried, mother, I did. You saw–” he stops himself, “it doesn’t matter.”

“It does. Very much. You’re family.”

“Are we? He’s disowned me more than he’s ever claimed me.”

“You’re too much alike, that’s your problem,” she chides, “and you’re both too stubborn to see it.”

“We will discuss this another time,” he says as he peeks at you again, “in private.”

“Should I…” you begin.

“Stay,” Frigga and her son command at the same time.

“I’m not sending her home empty-handed,” Frigga says, “so you will drive her home, yes? It will be too much to take on the bus.”

“Why, of course,” he accepts, “it would be my pleasure.”

“Mm, and the carpenter, he fixed the flower boxes already. A few loose nails,” she grins, “nice man, that one. I might recommend him to your father.”

Laufeyson pokes his tongue out as he squints. He turns his gaze back on you. You miss when he barely looked at you, when he hardly even acknowledged your existence. And yet, you're just the same. You can't say a word.

“I haven’t dealt with him much,” he says pointedly, “that is the house manager’s concern.”

“Probably better off,” Frigga snickers, “she won’t drive him away.”

#loki #dark loki #dark!loki #loki x reader #fic #dark fic #dark!fic #au #maid au #series #dirty work #avengers #mcu #marvel #thor

257 notes · View notes

sunny44 · 1 year

Text

I can’t do this anymore

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x wife!reader

Warnings: fights and mentions of divorce.

Summary: Y/n is tired of living in a marriage where she is the only one who puts him as a priority.

Next chapter

I knew that marriages were not easy, and I also knew that it would be hard to be married to a guy who spends most of the year away from home.

Carlos and I met when we were 20, dated for 5 and have been married for 3, we have never had any problems that would make me think about not being with him anymore.

But lately this thought has been haunting me and silently torturing me.

We are already at a stage in our relationship where we should be thinking about having a family, or are already trying to.

Actually I was thinking about it but it seems that Carlos wants to avoid this thought at all costs.

I try to bring him into a conversation and he cuts me off, changes the subject or even says that he can't be a father right now.

This weekend was the race in Spain and me and his family were here cheering for him.

"Are you okay honey?" His mother asks.

"Yeah, just a little nauseous." At the same time she smiles.

"Honey that's great, I knew you and Carlos were at that part of the relationship but I didn't think it was this close."

"No, no I'm not pregnant." Her smile fades. "I wanted to but I'm not and I don't think I will be for a long time."

"What do you mean?"

"It's nothing." I try to deflect the subject.

"Come on, let's get some coffee." I sigh and go with her.

After we buy the coffees and find a quieter place and she returns to the subject.

"Is something going on with you and Carlos? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, or at least I think so."

"Do you want to tell me?"

"It's just that we've been together for many years now and I thought by this point in our relationship we'd be planning to have a family and everything but Carlos doesn't seem very interested in that." I took a sip of my coffee. "I guess we are at different points in our lives."

"And that worries you doesn't it?"

"It's just that Carlos has putting his career first more than anything right now and I know how important it is to him and that's not a problem for me, it never has been. It's just that at the end of it all what we have in life is our family and I don't want to have to wait any longer for him to decide he wants to before we get started."

"I'm sorry about that." I smiled and wiped my tears away.

"It's okay." She smiles and we remain silent.

…

We were already back at home, Carlos had come in second place and obviously wasn't one of the happiest but he wasn't unhappy either.

"Can we talk?" I asked sitting down next to him on the couch.

"I'm tired now."

"But you're not to watch soccer aren't you." I said ironically starting to get up but he held my hand and turned off the TV.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Let's talk."

"We're fine aren't we?"

"Of course we're fine, why are you asking that?”

"Because I feel like every time I go to talk to you about our family or the lack of it you cut me off and change the subject and that makes me feel like you don't want or you don’t want with me."

"Love is not that." He comes closer and wipes a tear that has run down my cheek. "It's not that I don’t want to have a family with you but we can't right now."

"What do you mean we can't now?"

"It's just that I really feel like I have a chance to win this year and I can't have any distractions." At this I laughed wryly.

"Distractions? Is that what I am to you? A fucking distraction." I get up from the couch. "I’m sorry Carlos that I'm a distraction to you and that me thinking about our future is something that bothers you so much, but I'm not going to stand here and let my life pass me by just because you don't want to have a family."

"What does that mean?"

"That I can't do this anymore." He got up from the couch. "I don't want to wait around anymore waiting for you to decide whether or not to have children because I want to, I want to be a mother, I want to leave something in this world after I die and I'm not going to wait around for you anymore."

"What are you saying?"

"I want a divorce."

"What? Babe don’t say that."

"I've already made up my mind Carlos. I've been thinking about it for a while and I didn't want this because I love you so much but you're leaving me no other option." He tries to get close to me but I pull away. "I'm going to get my things and go to my parents house and I'm going to start divorce proceedings as soon as possible."

I didn't even let him speak, I just went upstairs to our room and grabbed a suitcase and started putting some things inside.

When I came downstairs he was sitting on the couch in shock.

"I'll get the rest of my stuff another time." He doesn't even look at me and I even think he heard well so I just walked out leaving my whole life behind.

And that's when I realized that the worst feeling is when you don't want to give up on someone but you know you have to.

Let me know if you guys are interested in a part 2

856 notes · View notes

selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs · 10 months

Note

hi! I'm not sure if your taking requests or not, if your not please ignore this, but could you please write a self aware dazai, or any characters you'd like, learning that the reader has similar trauma as dazai, just some small aspects are different? thank you for your time!!

Hello! Hope, you like this. You are welcome.

When they learned, that you have similar trauma

Self-Aware! Dazai Osamu x GN!Reader

(Slight Self-aware! Oda Sakunosuke x GN!Reader)

Warning: Yandere, OOC, BSD characters stalks Reader, slight spoilers for "Dazai Osamu and dark era", mentions of death, few years ago Reader wasn't in the best place in their lives, English is my second language.

🪢🦀 It happened after you installed BSD Mayoi app and BSD gang gain access to the rest of your phone.

🪢🦀 Now they can hear your talking not only when you are using their app, reading manga/Light Novel or watching anime. Now they can hear you in your everyday life.

🪢🦀 Of course, they are looking after you for your own good. When they finally get to your world, they need to know who they should punish for wronging you.

🪢🦀 This cashier, who was rude to you and tried to scam you? Fitzgerald will destroy him financially.

🪢🦀 The terrible entitled parents in the park, who try to take away your phone and give to their children? Fukuzawa and Yosano will make them apologies.

🪢🦀 Entitled brats that ruined your notebooks? Elise and Q will show them, that you shouldn't be messed up with.

🪢🦀 Creepy old man that made you uncomfortable? Hirotsu and Melville will taught him some respect.

🪢🦀 But, until they find a way to your world, they only can send you some messages to lift your spirit up.

🪢🦀 Ango recently add another menu called "Message for you" to the game that allows them to leave you messages without adding presents. It's not that they were stingy, no. It happened because Gift Box won't allow them to send long messages. Moreover, they can send only one message per day. So, a new menu allows them to send more messages to you.

🪢🦀 You, for the most part, seem to be a cheerful person.

🪢🦀 So, when one day BSD gang felt that you are grieving, they were worried.

🪢🦀 They wanted to help you. But, the only thing they can do is sent another message to you.

🪢🦀 Dazai asked to be the one, who sent the message.

___________________________________

A familiar notification from "Message for You" popped up before your eyes. You mindlessly open it. It was a message from Dazai.

"[Y/N], dear, I hope you are doing well. If you are not... Well, do you want to talk about it? Dazai Osamu"

Little chibi Dazai was standing under the message text, looking at you. You stay silent for a moment. Then you start talking.

"I guess I can talk about it. Yes, you can't hear me, but, at least, I will talk this out. Today is the anniversary of my dear friend's death."

And you talked.

You talked about what happened few years ago. About feeling out of place. About feeling empty. About trying to find anything that can make you feel whole. About uncertainty in the future. About pressure from your family. About you failing in classes.

You talked about meeting your friend. About them been the best person in your life. About them helping you more than anyone at that period of time. They just were there. They didn't force you to speak about your feelings. Not only that, but they didn't shame you about your grades.

They were your anchor. Because of them, you were able to feel better. Life became good again.

And then they died.

You were crying, you can't manage to tell, how exactly they died. But you manage to say, that your friend died in a hospital. And that they managed to tell you something important. That you are good enough, that you shouldn't try to prove your worth to others. That your happiness matters.

Through sobs, you managed to whisper:

"If you think about it, Dazai, we are kinda the same. Both of us were lost, both of us were saved by a kind person, you by Oda, I by my friend, and both of us lost them. Thanks for listening. But, I think, I will go now."

You closed the app.

You didn't notice that Dazai sprite has tears in his eyes.

_____________________________________

🪢🦀 For a moment, everyone was quiet. They were sad after learning about your past.

🪢🦀 Yosano, who already felt bad for hating you before, felt even worse.

🪢🦀 Some of the characters cried. They thought that it's unfair, that someone like you suffered through such traumatic experience.

🪢🦀 All characters were concerned about you. You didn't deserve to experience this pain. They will start working harder. They will reach your world.

🪢🦀 But Dazai has the strongest reaction.

🪢🦀 Dazai was paralyzed. He feels tears running down his cheeks. You two were the same. But, you did something, that Dazai can never do for you. You brought Oda back.

🪢🦀 Dazai looked at the Infirmary door. Oda was standing there, leaning on the wall. Oda also looked concerned and sad.

🪢🦀🍛 Few days ago, you got Oda's card from scout. And Oda, like Shibusawa a few months prior, appears in ADA's office. He was dizzy and lost, but, according to Yosano, he was fine mentally and physically and just needs some rest. Soon he will manage to walk around.

🪢🦀🍛 Dazai was ready to work 24/7 just to reach your world. Oda manage to stop Dazai, before he tried to threaten to shoot Ango, Katai and Fyodor if they didn't find a way to your world immediately.

🪢🦀 Dazai want to hold you in his arms. Dazai want to protect you. Dazai want to take your pain away. Dazai will do anything he can to be with you. You will be happy and safe. He will let you cry on his shoulder.

🍛 Oda want to console you. Oda want to be near you. He isn't planning to replace your friend, but he wants to become as important to you as them. When Oda recovers, he will do his best to help others with finding a way to you.

🪢🦀🍛 Both Oda and Dazai will send you encouraging messages. They will try to make you smile.

🪢🦀🍛 You may not see each other eye to eye, but you are important to them. And they want to keep you safe.

#bungou stray dogs au #self-awareau #self-awarebsd #bsd #bsd x gender neutral reader #bungou stray dogs #gender neutral reader #bsd anime #yandere #Self-Aware Dazai Osamu #Self-Aware Oda Sakunosuke #dazai osamu x reader #oda sakunosuke #Dazai Osamu #oda sakunosuke x reader #bsd x reader

408 notes · View notes

babiexiao · 9 months

Text

contains : princess / fem!reader, head knight!gojo, implied secret relationship. this is just... angst i guess with a sprinkle of fluff... overprotective gojo *moans* this is about 1k of brainrot word vomit hhhhhhhhhhhhh :D not proofread cause i'm lazy, pls ignore any mistakes!

time moved by far too slow for satoru. for someone whose day passed in a blink of an eye with all of his responsibilities, today was far too slow. it felt like watching paint dry. it felt like a snail moving across the pavement. it felt like a century had passed before the bright light of the sun finally started to set. dusk slowly turning into night, and as the moon took its place in the night sky, was he able to escape from his duties and finally able to walk to your bedroom, hands held in tight fists by his sides.

"you two may leave. the king wants me to be stationed here for tonight." a lie. but the two guards didn't know any better. why would they ever think their head knight would ever lie to them in the first place.

what they don't know, won't hurt them, was what gojo told himself, watching the two salute him and proceeding to walk down the corridor far away from your bedroom. he waited till they were out of sight first and then listened out for the clunking noises the armour made as they walked down the stairs. when it was finally silent, he opened your door, shutting it behind him quickly.

you almost let out a scream at the sudden intrusion into your space. fear from the attack on your life only a night prior still too fresh in your mind. but the white mop of hair on top of the males head had you sighing in relief, aware that it was not an intruder but in fact satoru. but that relief didn't stay for too long. you were well aware that the king would have placed guards outside your door to keep you safe after what had happened and you could not afford to let your relationship with satoru be revealed just yet.

"satoru, what are you doing here? my father–" your worried whisper was cut short rather abruptly.

"fuck your father." if satoru was in a better mindset than he is now, he never would have spoken of the king, your father, in such a way and he's never been more glad there were no guards standing post outside your bedroom to judge his vulgar use of words towards the monarch either.

"are you hurt? did they touch you?" immediately, he's bombarding you with questions, eyebrows furrowed deeply as his eyes start to dart over your body. inspecting you. "would you let me have a look at you. please?"

you nod slightly, but turn your head to the right side a little, fearing what he'll do when he sees it.

his takes large but quiet strides towards you, hands that shook with fear now reaching out to hold your wrists. he inspects your skin, slowly, letting his hands and eyes travel across your skin, and it all seems fine until he brushes the strands of hair out of your face and finally notices the freshly dried blood on your cheek. it looked deep. no, it was deep. gojo was no stranger to cuts and bruises, even with a simple glance he could tell it was deep. it would leave a scar behind and it would take time to heal.

"i..." he inhales shakily, trying to keep his voice low as he could. an attempt to keep himself calm, to keep himself from lashing out. "i-i should have been there."

"satoru..." you began, only to be cut off again.

"i should have fucking been there." remorse. that's all satoru could feel. remorse for not being by your side like he had promised many moons earlier as you two hid from the maids attempting to prepare you for bed. remorse for not being by your side to keep you from harm. but hidden in that remorse, was also anger. anger that anyone even dared to touch a princess – not just any princess. his princess. the very princess that would become his queen in the future. the very princess that should have everyone in the land bowing to her. the princess he loves and swore to keep out of harms way.

"i should have fucking protected you. shit– i should have been there. i should have been protecting you like i said i would... i'm sor–"

"toru. i'm okay. please look at me." you place a gentle had over his chest, albeit over his armour, you swear you're able to feel how furiously his heart is beating. it doesn't take a genius to see all the emotions swimming in his eyes.

worry. hurt. pain. regret.

"satoru - the strongest knight in the kingdom... my favourite knight - gojo. i am okay. i promise you." the praise earns a brief smile from him before it fades, his thumb brushing the deep cut on your cheek ever so gently but it makes you inhale sharply anyway. it causes gojo to flinch, withdrawing his warm hands immediately but you reach out for his wrist with both hands desperately. "n-no! it... it jus' hurts because it's fresh... please, i just– i just need to feel you, toru. please, don't be afraid to touch me."

it was all gojo needed to hear from you. all he needed was your permission to touch you and he does. he cups your face in his hands, watching as the tension and stress leaves your body, jaw loosening and eyebrows relaxing. he watches as your eyes close for a few seconds before fluttering open. you place a kiss against the palm of his hand. "will you please stay the night with me? i'm... afraid they will come back." gojo watches you tense up at the mention of the men who tried to hurt you last night. his response is immediate.

"of course i will." his thumb finds its way to the wrinkles in the middle of your eyebrows, rubbing the spot a little. "do not frown so much. you will start looking older than you are, princess."

his teasing earns a smile from you, and he's glad when he sees you soften in his hold. the both of you stay silent for a while, finding comfort in the silence and each other. you've always felt safe with satoru, and tonight is no different.

"princess," he begins, pulling you in by your waist ever so slightly, your body pressed up against his armour. "i swear on my life, i will kill any bastard who dares lay so much as a finger on you again. i promise you. i'll execute them myself." you do not bother replying to him, instead sealing the promise he's made by standing on your tippy toes to press your lips against his.

#was supposed to be inspired by that one scene from the glory (iykyk) but it didn't go the way i wanted to this happened instead lmaooo #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo fluff #gojo angst #jjk x reader #jjk angst #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #if this is shit please don't come @ me i've never written straight up fluff / angst before and i'm so nervous abt posting this weeeeeee #going into hiding now #i need to fix my tags but i am far too lazy so sorry about that

329 notes · View notes

themultifandomgal · 10 months

Text

Isaiah Jesus-Wrapped Around Her Finger

Here’s another request!

I stand starring at Isaiah after telling him the news that I'm pregnant. We have been courting one another behind my brothers backs now for a year, but this was definitely not planned

"Say something, please" I beg

"Your brothers are going to kill me"

"Bloody hell Is, that's what your worried about? I just told you I'm pregnant"

"Of course that's what I'm worried about. When you tell them I loose all chance of being a father and living" he throws his arms in the air

"Oh don't be so dramatic Is. They won't kill you. Force you to marry me, most likely"

"Whoever said that marrying you would be forced?" Isaiah looks at me with a frown

"Were you really going to ask my brothers if you could marry me?" I cross my arms with a raised eyebrow

"In the future yeah, but looks like we will have to marry quicker"

"Tommy and Grace didn't marry straight away, maybe Tommy will be more relaxed about all of this"

"At least let me prepare myself for the rathe of the Shelby's"

"Fine but we tell them end of this week"

The end of the week comes by way to quickly and now I'm stood in front of my whole family about to tell them that I'm pregnant

"Alright YN. Out with it" Tommy says placing an unlit cigarette in his mouth before lighting it up

"Well erm. I guess we should just come out with it"

"We?" Arthur questions looking between me and and Isaiah

"Yes. Err we have been, involved with each other for a while now and...."

"And what?" Tommy asks with an angry expression

"I'm pregnant"

"What!" John is the first one out of his chair "you better be bloody joking"

"Calm down John. YNs not a kid anymore. She's the same age as we were when we had..."

"We were married" John points at Esme

"Fuck sake YN. I don't care that you've been busy behind our backs because your an adult but how stupid can you be to get pregnant?"

"Arthur that's unfair. You could say the same for me"

"I did" Arthur retaliates looking at Ada. I look at Tommy worried because he hasn't said anything yet

"Tom?"

"Well. Can't say I'm not disappointed, but I got Grace pregnant out of marriage and John boy only married Martha because she got pregnant so I can't get to angry. However. I think Isaiah and I should have a little chat"

"Oh Tommy leave him be" Polly says getting up and walking over to me "congratulations sweetheart" she pulls me into a hug and kisses my cheek

"How can you all be so chilled out by this?" Arthur asks annoyed "Isaiah was meant to keep YN safe and away from men"

"He did just that didn't he" John grumbles. A fire is then lit up inside me and I suddenly get very brave

"Ok wether you like it or not, I'm pregnant and I'm having this baby. Isaiah and I aren't getting married just because I'm pregnant. So you can either all act like my family or fuck off" I notice Tommy smirking. John and Arthur both settle back down, still grumbling about how they aren't happy with me. I roll my eyes and then I'm pulled into another hug, this time by Ada and Esme

"Congratulations YN" Ada says

"Thank you"

"So am I going to survive long enough to see my child?" Isaiah asks

"You'll survive long enough to raise the child, love the child and take care of my sister" Tommy stubs his cigarette out and leans back in his chair

"Yeah, yeah course"

"Thank you Tommy" I run over to him and hug him being grateful that he was able to keep everyone calm, or as calm as the Shelby boys can be

"She's always had him wrapped round her bloody finger" Arthur grumbles takes a swig of his drink. I roll my eyes at the comment. All my brothers love me so him and John will get over this eventually.

#peaky blinders #peaky blinders imagine #isaiah jesus x y/n #isiah jesus x reader #isaiah jesus x reader #isaiah jesus x oc #isaiah jesus imagine

338 notes · View notes

writingchalamet · 1 year

Text

Set a Fire in My Heart

Summary: You live in the same building as Bucky and Sam always teases Bucky about going out with you, little does he know that you have feelings for him, and you end up taking him out to a 40's themed bar.

*Warnings - none, pure fluff, kissing, soft Bucky.

You could hear Bucky and Sam's distinct distinct laughter in the hallway of the apartment building as you neared the front door with your laundry basket. A small smile crept its way to your face as you heard Sam's muffled voice teasing Bucky about something, likely something that happened on a mission. You opened your door clutching the laundry basket against your hip, awkwardly bumping into the frame of the door as you squeezed passed. Bucky's head instantly raised as he noticed your door opening and came rushing to your aid, taking the basket from under your arm, "hey, let me get that" Your eyes met and there was a prolonged silence where the two of you just stared at each other, you were completely lost in his angelic blue eyes and all the breath left your body for a moment in pure bliss. He gave you a subtle smile as his flesh hand grazed over your taking the basket from your grip.

"Are you two gonna talk or just stare at each other like psychopaths?" Sam interjected himself, and you were awakened from your trance like state, you gained your breath back and smiled shaking your head. you hummed to yourself shortly, before greeting the pair "Hi" you smiled, Bucky returned the greeting and Sam nodded towards you silently laughing at how awkward the pair of you were.

It was no secret to those looking in that you and Bucky were head over heals for each other, which is why Sam could not understand why in the last year Bucky hadn't asked you out on a date. From the first second he saw you stepping out from the moving van carrying a box, he saw a light in his best friends eyes he had never seen before, and it just so happened you were moving in on the same floor just two doors down, Sam thought Bucky had hit the Jackpot. From that point on every time the two of you had seen each other neither one of you could really talk, too caught up in one another's eyes to say anything, which Sam found to be hilarious.

"How are you? I've not seen you for a while have you guys been on a mission?" you asked genuine concern laced in your voice, Bucky noticed your eyebrows arched with worry ever so slightly which he found adorable. "Yeah I'm good, we have been on a mission across Europe, nothing to major, all is well, how are you though?" - "sure if you call 10 guys in tactical gear trying to assassinate the president of France a 'non major threat' then sure we're all good!" Sam jumped in sarcastically, your eyes bulge and your mouth goes agape. Bucky gives Sam a light slap on his chest with his vibranium limb. "Are you really trying to downplay being a superhero Bucky?" you teased him with a cheeky smile. he goes to reply "I mean-" Sam interjects again "the answer is yes Buck, anyway you got any plans today y/n, or this weekend, or near future?" he hints nudging Bucky who clears his throat and looks to the ground. "no apart from doing my laundry, I actually have some annual leave so I'll just be chilling, hanging out." There was a brief pause where the three of you all looked back and forth between each other. "Umm well I guess I should get on with my laundry then..." Bucky smiles and hands you back your basket as your hands gently outstretch towards him. "It was nice seeing you both, I'm glad your mission went well, I'll see you later" you nod towards both the men giving them one last smile over your shoulder as you head towards the elevator.

as soon as you are out of ear shot Sam hits Bucky's chest, "What the hell man, she just basically begged you to ask her out!" Sam exclaimed arms flailing in the air, a pissed off expression clear on his face. "what no she didn't" Bucky shoots himself down. "Yes she did man! she explicitly told you she doesn't have anything going on for the foreseeable future, if that's not an invitation to ask her out on a date then I don't know what is!" Bucky continued to shake his head and started walking back towards his own apartment.

---

It was a few days later and all you had done on your time off was think about Bucky, you had given him so many opportunities to ask you on a date but he seemed to miss every single one. You initially figured it was to do with the fact that he was 106 years old and you were in your mid twenties but you could clearly see that he was attracted to you, from the way he looked at you to the way he acted around you, you had dated your fare share of people to understand what plain attraction looks like, but why wouldn't he ask you out, was he just as frightened of rejection as you? He had fought aliens, and helped saved the world from numerous threats but was too scared to ask out a girl so you thought you would bite the bullet and ask him on a date yourself. simple as that and if he says no, you only ever had to see him in the hallways.

You poured yourself a large glass of wine for liquid luck and downed it, giving yourself a glance over in the mirror, you fixed your hair and made your way into the hallway, taking in a deep breath as you reach his front door, you knock softly on his front door, part of brain praying it was too soft for him to hear to save yourself the pain if he says no, but to your luck, and Bucky's super soldier hearing he opens almost straight away. "Y/n are you okay?" he looks around the hallway to spot if there was any danger, you never knock on his door. "Yes Bucky, I'm good, very good actually, I wanted to ask if you umm... If you would like to go out with me this evening... on a date?" your face was so serious Bucky could not tell if this was a joke that Sam had put you up to. "Are you sure?" Bucky's response made your head tilt, you had never been asked if you were sure you really wanted to go on a date with someone you had asked out, you laughed out loud and shook your head, "I wouldn't have asked you if I wasn't sure" you smile up at him and see a blush rise from his neck up to his cheeks. It was a notion you had never seen from him before but one you would grow to love. "Yes, I would love to go out with you" he responds smiling, blush still very apparent on his cheeks. "Okay great, be ready for 8, I have somewhere in mind, dress smart, I'll see you later" with a rush of confidence you brazenly lean in and plant a kiss on his blushed cheeks which only make them burn hotter, you swiftly turn on your feet and practically run back to your apartment with your heart pounding from your chest. Bucky is just left stood at his door stunned, in disbelief that this is actually happening.

As soon as he steps back inside his apartment he reaches for his phone on the counter to call Sam. He hears the chimes of the phone ringing for a few moments before Sam finally answers "What's up cyborg!" HIs voice booms through the speakers, "You tell me Sam, have you been talking to Y/n over the last few days?" Bucky questions him "Y/n, what would I have to say to her?" "I don't know Sam, maybe encouraging her to ask me on a date?" Bucky sighs hoping his sabotaging thoughts were not a reality. "She asked you out!!! Oh wow, when, how, where, when, why?!" Sam practically screams down the phone, "well I'm trying to figure out the why now Sam, did you or did you not put her up to this?" Bucky burst out his frustration. "Man do you really think I would do that to you, no I did not tell her to ask you out, I've been telling you for months that she's into you too! please tell me you said yes?" there is a pause and Bucky lets out another sigh, this time of relief. "Yeah I said yes, we're going out tonight at 8... I'm sorry I accused you, I uh, just really like her and I'm in my head." he hears Sam chuckle from the other end of the phone "I know man, just promise me you'll have a good time"

---

7.59pm

Bucky waited promptly by his door fixing his cufflinks, nervously shaking his legs, he thought about going into the hallway to meet you, or to even knock on your door, but he didn't want to scare you off with his eagerness . The second the clock turned 8pm there was a soft knock on his front door, the truth is you had also been anxiously waiting in the hallway, counting down the minutes to tap on his door. He secretly appreciated your promptness, never much enjoying being later for anything. He opened the door to see you standing there, beautiful as ever he thought, hair cascading down in soft curls, half pinned up at one side with a tortoise patterned clip, a deep purple slip dress with a cowl back, it was simple but elegant you thought. Bucky admired you, his eyes drinking you all in, you just looked at him almost laughing as he continued to eye you up and down, he clearly appreciated the effort you had put in. "Hi" Bucky released a breath he didn't know he was holding as he leaned towards you and placed a soft kiss on your cheek, a smile instant on your face, "shall we head out?" Buck just nods in return and takes your hand.

Bucky is confused when you park your car by a convenience store and exit the car nodding your head excitedly for him to follow, he hears your car lock and thinks you must have to pick something up. You take his flesh hand once more and walk towards the worked behind the cash register, a youngish girl looks up from her phone and smiles at the pair of you. Bucky notices you slip her some money across the counter which he finds strange. he eyes the pair of you confused. "I'm looking for starlight, can you help me please?" Bucky is sure you're attempting to buy drugs for a moment in the most casual way possible and is bewildered by your ballsy attitude. "sure, ice cream freezer at the very back, mind the steps" the worker smiles and nods towards the back of the shop and goes back to scrolling though her phone, Bucky is still in utter confusion at the entire encounter. You squeeze Bucky's hand and give him a "come on" in encouragement, amused by his puzzled face.

You reach the Ice cream freezer door at the back of the shop and open the door towards you to reveal a dimly lit hallway and a set of stairs leading to a basement, you outstretch your hand signalling for Bucky to go first, he steps inside the freezer, which is not a freezer at all and walks down the hallway, you close the door behind you, as the pair of you begin to walk down the stairs the sound of 40's jazz music is muffled behind a door. Bucky's eyes begin to light up, you reach the bottom of the stairs and tap on the door in a certain rhythm and the door is opened for you, revealing a 1940's themed jazz bar, 'The Starlight Speakeasy' You smile as you look up to Bucky, his eyes almost filling with tears as he looks around the room in wonder. He knew these places existed but he never thought they would be this accurate, he felt like he had been transported back home, and he was 24 again off to war.

"Is this okay Bucky? I thought you'd like it, if it's too much we can go somewhere else?" you begin to ramble and he squeezes your hands, bringing them up to his chest, "this is more than perfect, thank you... now let me get you drink" he smiles and practically drags you to the bar. The warm crackle of the music playing through the speakers made you feel fuzzy and made Bucky feel at home, he ordered himself a beer and a glass of wine for you, he knows exactly what your favourite is after helping you carry your shopping up to your apartment many times, which made your heart flutter. "I bet it didn't cost you this much money for a drink back in the day" you laughed he shook his head "you wanna know how much a beer cost back then? not even a dime, like 4,5 cents" your eyes nearly fell out of your head "you're kidding right! that's insane, you must think everyone is trying to rob you with the cost of everything these days" Bucky only laughs and shakes his head. The pair of you find a table and sip your drinks, watching couples dancing, your head sways along to the music, and the pair of you chit chat. Bucky notices you sitting more on the edge of your seat, tapping your feet and he takes his chance, just then one of his favourite songs begins playing ' I don't want to set the world on fire' by the Ink Spots. Bucky stands and places his hand in front of your seated figure. You shyly place your hand in his and follow him to the dance floor.

He pulls you close and you instantly breath him in, he smells of cologne and the bitter beer he has been drinking, his flesh arm wraps around your waist and you hold onto his vibranium hand, you look up at him and see his eyes are closed, he looks peaceful, which is a sight you never want to leave your eyes. Your finger traces his finger to the palm of his hand and back to intertwine your fingers again. He opens his eyes at your touch, "Can you feel that, I read that Vibranium can take in kinetic energy does that mean you can still feel things with your hand?" your eyes met his in genuine wonder "I can, it's to do with the electrodes in my brain, but yeah I can feel things" after hearing this you took his hand and placed it against your cheek and leaned into it as you continued to sway. You could feel his pulse beating fast against your chest, he stroked your cheek and brushed his metal thumb across your soft lips, his hand stopped to softly grip your chin and pushed your head up slightly. Your eyes met briefly glancing between the baby blues and his pink lips, your breath hitched and he leaned it, catching your lips in a kiss. You nuzzled your nose against his after your short kiss before going back for more, his hand slid along your jaw holding just below your ear, his other arm tightening its grip, he opened his mouth encouraging you to deepen the kiss, you could feel his hot breath and the taste of bitter against his tongue as you deepened the kiss further. You wanted this moment to last forever but sadly you had to pull away to breathe. Bucky smiled and placed his hand back against your cheek brushing the blush that had risen.

"you have no idea how long I have wanted to do that" Bucky sighs out leaning his head down atop of yours. "oh believe me, I do" you giggle. The pair of you stayed like that for the rest of the night, continuing to dance, kiss, drink and talk the night away, it was the happiest Bucky had been for a very long time.

#Bucky Barnes #Bucky x reader #bucky imagine #bucky x female reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes imagine #tfatws #sebatian stan #sebatian stan imagine #sebatian x reader #sebatian fanfic #fanfiction

486 notes · View notes

lanadelnegan · 6 months

Text

My Past, My Future - Part 5 (Final part)

Negan x Reader x Daryl

part four here / part one here

Warnings: 18+, smut, angst

Note: I'm sorry this took so long for me to post. Been kinda out of it lately, but probably gonna start posting regularly again.

Red = Negan / Blue = Daryl / Pink - Reader

"Negan..." Your jaw lowers slightly in disbelief as you look up into his tired eyes. Before your brain has time to stop you, you lunge forward, wrapping your arms around his neck and inhaling the familiar smell of him. "God I am so glad you're okay." A tear falls from your cheek as he nuzzles his face into the side of your neck and holds you tight.

Pulling back slightly after a moment too long, you clear your throat awkwardly and drop your hands to your sides. You quickly wipe the tear slipping down your cheek as Negan tilts his head at you empathetically. "Baby.."

"No..." You shake your head, remembering how Negan left you - alone and worried to death. "Negan, I - I don't understand. Why? Why did you leave?" You ramble, letting the hurt and anger wash over you all over again. "I looked for you for three weeks straight. I didn't eat.. didn't sleep.. just cried until I couldn't anymore."

"I saw you two.. kissing.. I thought -"

"You thought wrong, Negan. I wanted it to be you. I told Daryl that after the kiss. I came back to Alexandria that night to tell you, and you - you were gone. How could you do that to me? Just leave and not even look back like I never meant anything to you?"

"C'mon, You know that's not true... Was I supposed to just stay there and fuckin' watch you be with him?!"

Before you can respond, the front door swings open behind you and Daryl quickly appears at your side, wrapping his arm protectively around your waist.

Negan scoffs, glancing down at Daryl's hand gripping you possessively. "Seriously? You two are a thing now, huh? And you expect me to believe you were gonna fuckin' choose me?"

"Believe what you want. It's the truth. Not that it matters anymore. You left. You made your decision."

"Yeah." Negan nods. "I guess you did too."

"You dunno what the hell you're talkin' about. Got no right to talk to her like that when you just up and left." Daryl's jaw clenches as he glares at Negan.

"Seems like it worked out for you. I dunno why you're fuckin' complainin'."

"Cuz I'm not selfish. I wanted her to by happy."

"And I'm selfish? For leaving behind the love of my fucking life just so I wouldn't get in the way of her and another man!? If anyone's selfish it's you! Throwing a fit because the girl you were too scared to admit your feelings to wanted me and not you."

You grab Daryl's wrist, pulling him back as he lunges forward at Negan. "Enough! This is too much. I can't - I can't deal with this right now." You cry as both men reach out to comfort you.

Negan lets out a long sigh. "Look, it's getting dark. And I know you're tired. Let's call it a night and sort this out tomorrow."

Daryl hesitantly nods, accepting Negan's offer when you look to him for an answer and you both follow Negan into the house. It's old and wooden and Negan's smell fills the air. Your heart aches at the thought of Negan here by himself all this time... he is here by himself right?

"Do you.. live here alone?" You ask, looking around for any signs of other company.

"Nah. Girlfriend should be back any minute."

You roll your eyes at the teasing tone of his voice, trying to hide your smile when he winks at you.

"Hungry?" He points behind himself to the kitchen.

"No.. thanks. Just tired."

"You two can take the bedroom.. I'll sleep out here on the couch. Just let me clean up and change first." Negan says before heading to his bedroom. "Make yourselves at home." He calls out before shutting his door.

Six months ago you were confessing your love for each other and having sex on your couch. Now he's offering up his bed to you and another man? Daryl rests his hand on your lower back and you turn around to hug him, laying your head on his chest.

"Daryl.. I want you to know you have nothing to worry about. We'll leave in the morning."

"Not worried." He reassures you by planting a gentle kiss on your forehead. He knows he is, but the last thing he wants is to put more stress and pressure on you right now.

Negan enters the room again, announcing his presence with an awkward clearing of his throat. "Room's ready. Changed the sheets."

Daryl leads the way, bumping past Negan rudely as he disappears into the master bathroom. You walk past Negan, brushing your hand against his before he gently wraps his hand around your wrist and looks down at you. "The idea of you in my bed with another man fucking infuriates me. Everything I do.. everything I did.. was for your happiness. Not mine... Just so you know." His hazel eyes fall to your lips for a moment before he slowly looks back up into your eyes. You restrain yourself from kissing him, remembering the way his soft lips felt against yours as his stubble pricked at your face. You can't deny you miss kissing him. Having long deep conversations with him.. Fucking him. All your memories together flow through your mind as you stare up at him.

"Are you happy with him, y/n?" Negan's eyes dart back and forth between yours.

"...Yes."

"Good..." He nods before walking away and you watch him sink to the couch as you enter his bedroom. You find Daryl already laying in bed and immediately climb in the bed behind him to comfort him. You know this must be difficult for him. You nuzzle your face into the back of his neck. "Baby.. I told you not to worry."

He doesn't say anything as you run your fingers comfortingly through his thick strands of hair. "I love you, Daryl."

"You love him too." He says matter-of-factly.

You don't respond, knowing you'd be lying if you tried to argue with him. So instead, you wrap your arm around him and settle into the sheets. The pillowcase smells like Negan as you shut your eyes and drift off quickly, dreaming of a world where you don't have to choose between the two men you'd die for.

As soon as Daryl hears your light snore, he slips out of bed, quietly finding his way into the living room where Negan is wide awake on the couch staring at the ceiling.

"We need to talk."

Negan's chest rises and falls as he lets out a long sigh. "Nothin' to say."

"Oh.. now you wanna stay quiet?"

"Now you wanna fuckin' talk?"

Daryl ignores Negan's comeback, sitting in a chair across from the couch. A long moment passes before Daryl finally speaks again.

"I know you love y/n. I know you've changed. But I'll never forget what you've done. When we came back to Alexandria and realized you were gone... I hoped you'd never come back."

Negan huffs, leaning back further into the couch before Daryl continues.

"Until I saw how much it broke her. She wouldn't eat. Wouldn't sleep. Unless I made her. Was so worried about her I couldn't let her outta my sight. You did that to her."

Negan gulps down, fighting back tears as he hears how much he hurt you.

"And for some stupid reason.. she still loves you."

Negan scoffs, shaking his head slightly before gazing back up at the ceiling. "...When Lucille passed, I knew I wouldn't be able to love anyone the way I loved her. Lucille was.. my everything. Hell, named a fuckin' baseball bat after her just so I wouldn't have to say goodbye... You know where that bat is now?"

Daryl grunts, waiting for Negan's answer. Negan's head nods towards the fireplace, as they watch the wood crack underneath the flames for awhile.

"I said goodbye to Lucille that day because I finally found someone I could be happy with again... When I made the decision to leave, that was for y/n. Not for me. I knew you'd be there to take my place, and I thought that's what she fuckin' wanted. But me? I didn't eat either. Didn't sleep. Worried about her every day. Still fuckin' do."

Daryl's head drops forward as his elbows rest on his knees, carefully taking in Negan's words.

"She misses you."

"Why are you tellin' me this?"

"Cause I want the same thing as you. Just want her to be happy."

"So what? You're.. giving her back to me?" Negan's head shakes sarcastically, mocking the idea.

"In your dreams.... What I'm sayin' is, we love her and she loves us. Why make her choose?"

Negan's nose scrunches as he looks to Daryl, sitting up now and leaning forward. "Wait, wait, wait. You're not serious. Are you seriously suggesting a... throuple?"

"Nah. I ain't gay." Daryl grunts. "It's not about me and you. Just her."

"Too bad. Thought you were finally comin' around." Negan raises his brows suggestively, making Daryl stand and roll his eyes annoyed. He stops at the bedroom door, looking back to Negan expectantly. "You comin'?"

They both quietly enter the bedroom and slide in bed on either side of you. Still asleep, you snuggle against the warm body in front of you, roaming your hand along his stomach before stopping suddenly, realizing it's not Daryl. Your eyes jolt open to meet Negan's gaze in the dim lit room as he smirks down at you.

"Wha-"

"It's okay, babe." Daryl whispers in your ear from behind.

"You still love me, baby?" Negan asks, tilting your chin up and hovering his lips over yours.

You answer him by pressing your lips to his, closing the small gap. You can't help the involuntary moan that escapes your mouth as you taste him again for the first time in so long.

Negan's hand cups the back of your neck, bringing you closer as he deepens the kiss and flicks his tongue against yours. His mouth opens slightly as a throaty groan escapes and you almost whimper at how turned on you are. Finally turning your attention to Daryl behind you, your arm reaches behind you to grip his hair and pull him in for a kiss. He kisses you back hungrily as his rough hand glides down the side of your body, tracing your curves before reaching your ass and firmly squeezing.

After a moment, you pull away from his mouth to adjust yourself, leaning up for a moment to remove your shirt and bra before laying flat on your back between the two of them.

You stare vacantly at the ceiling, blinking a few times as you attempt to wake yourself from the obvious dream you must be having. But to no avail, your men remain pressed against your body as they nip at your skin and tease you with their fingers.

Shifting lower in the bed, they both take a hardened nipple into their mouth, making your head push into the pillow below you as you bite your lip to suppress your moan.

Negan flicks his tongue lightly over the sensitive bud, while Daryl's lips suction around the other, sucking over and over. You can't hide your noises anymore as you let them hear what they are doing to you. "Ohh my god. Fuck... that feels good."

Negan grins, letting his teeth gently squeeze your nipple before lowering his hand. He easily pops open the button on your jeans before roughly pushing them down your legs. Daryl raises to his knees, helping you get your pants and underwear off your ankles until you're completely bare in front of them.

You've been with them both one on one on multiple occasions, but this feels.. much more intense with both of them at the same time.

As Daryl bends down, getting ready to position himself to eat your pussy, Negan stops him. "Look man, not tryna be selfish here. But I've been deprived of that pussy for way too long. So please, allow me." He pleads.

Daryl glares at Negan for a moment before finally moving out of his way and letting him devour your cunt. Negan's face is buried between your legs the second Daryl gives him the go ahead and your jaw lowers as you make an o-shape with your lips at how good his mouth feels. His stubble tickles your inner thighs while his tongue repeatedly flicks deep inside of you.

"Fuck!" He comes up for air, before pressing his nose to your hole and inhaling the smell of you. "Goddamn I missed this sweet pussy."

"Move." Daryl demands, taking Negan's place and tossing your legs over his shoulders. His fingers spread your pussy lips apart, allowing him better access to your clit and sucking it harshly, urging you to orgasm.

Your gaze is focused on Negan as he stands by the bed, quickly discarding his clothes.

"Daryl!" You moan his name as your orgasm rushes through you, letting your eyes stay locked on Negan's, hoping to bring out his possessive side. A smirk appears on Negan's face as he chuckles darkly, knowing you're trying to make him jealous.

Just as Daryl comes up for air, wiping your juices from his chin, the bed dips as Negan crawls over you, taking your lips in his.

"You tryin' to tease me, baby? Cause it's fuckin' working."

He kisses you rhythmically before pulling on your lower lip with teeth and grinning at you. While you're busy locking tongues with Negan, Daryl positions himself on his back beside you. "Come mere baby. Need you."

You roll over on top of Daryl, letting your knees rest on either side of him as you hover your wet opening over his hard length and slide down slowly and completely, filling your cunt to the brim as your head falls back in pleasure.

Negan settles in behind you, bumping his hard cock against your ass. His hand wraps around your long strands of hair as he pulls, bringing your head back further and exposing the front of your neck.

Chills run down your spine when Negan whispers throatily in your ear. "Think you can take us both sweetheart?"

You answer him with a frantic nod and he chuckles, biting at the sensitive spot behind your ear and making chills spread over your arms.

"Fuck. Bend over him. Now." Negan grunts, pushing your back until you're laying over Daryl with his cock still inside you.

Negan's hand spreads one of your ass cheeks as he leans back slightly, watching you slide up and down on Daryl's cock. "Goddamn. You are creaming all over his fuckin' dick, darlin'." Negan's thumb reaches out, gathering a line of your juices from Daryl's shaft and bringing it to his mouth. He groans at the taste, eyes rolling in the back of his head as he sucks his own thumb. "Fuck." He whispers, dropping his thumb to your tight asshole now and circling it slowly. "Where do you want me baby?" He asks, pushing this thumb through your tightness. You cry out at the unfamiliar feeling.

"In.. in my pussy." You whine.

"Yeah? Such a big girl, so confident that you can take two big cocks in your little cunt at the same time." Negan chuckles darkly, pulling his finger out of your ass and rubbing his tip through your folds from behind as Daryl's breathes loud and heavy while you ride him.

Negan's hand grips your waist tightly, holding you in place as he guides his cock to your already filled hole. He slides his tip along Daryl's length before ultimately pushing through and burying himself deep inside you. Daryl grunts, adjusting slightly at the feeling of Negan's dick against his own.

You cry out as your walls are stretched further than they've ever been, and the thought of your men rubbing their cocks together inside of you makes your stomach flutter.

"Oh my goddd." You cry, overwhelmed at the intensity of being so full. Not only are your walls stretched to their limit, but both of them are painfully deep. Pressure and heat build in your abdomen as you feel yourself embarrassingly close to coming already.

“Holy shit, feels so fuckin’ good.” Negan whimpers, dropping his head back heavily as he thrusts into you.

Daryl’s jaw clenches as he stares up at you through glazed over eyes. “Is it too much babe? Tell us to stop if you need-“

“No. Please. Please don’t stop.” You beg, crashing your lips against Daryl’s as you moan into his mouth. Negan brings his hand down roughly, smacking your ass cheek and making you yelp into Daryl’s mouth.

Negan grunts, grabbing the back of your hair possessively and pulling your back against his chest. Your head turns as he kisses your lips sloppily from the side, bringing his hand around to wrap firmly around your throat as his throaty whisper flows in your ear. “I might be willing to share, but kissing another man when I’m balls deep in this cunt? Not gonna fuckin’ happen, doll.”

From this angle, one of their tips press repeatedly into just the right spot, making your cheeks burn hot. And Negan’s filthy words are just what you need to send you over the edge.

"Daryl! ... Negan! Fuuuck." You scream out, feeling warm liquid rush out of you. Both men groan at the feeling of you soaking their cocks as Negan's moans become faster and louder and Daryl grows quieter - an indicator that he's close.

"Come in me..Please.” You breathe out.

"Who?" Both men say in unison.

"..Both."

"Can't hold it anymore. I'm comin' baby. I'm fuckin' coming. Ahhh, fuuuuck." He lets out a long groan, spilling deep inside of you.

Daryl groans at the intense feeling of yours and Negan’s warm liquids surrounding his cock. He bites his bottom lip as he shoots his load in you, following each pulse of his dick with a mix of raspy whimpers and moans.

Negan slides out of you as you lift yourself off Daryl, falling to the bed next to him. When Negan joins you on the other side, you lace your fingers in both of their hands as you lay there out of breath.

"What the hell just happened?" You chuckle, not able to hide the ridiculous smile on your face.

"We don't wanna make you choose. Just want you to be happy. If you want us both, you've got us."

"But.. that's.."

Negan leans in, kissing your cheek before settling into the sheets and closing his eyes. "There's no rules in the apocalypse, baby. Shoulda learned that a long time ago."

tagging my babies: @loganlostitall @chaospossum @negansbabydoll66 @redqueenphoenix @n3g5nx @crustyweirdo @youngpersonaathletebear @sadgirlzluvdilfs @ilovebill-and-gustav @neganscumbucket @manipulatorpoem @im-a-goddamn-cat @raininhell @mahogany-cherry-wine @daryldixmedown@munsonslovergirl @sanctuaryforthelost @thelauraborealis @carlgrimesbbg @c3linesworld @blueheisenbergtragedy @dekuumademecumm @midnight-dixon @arthi-s

237 notes · View notes

spectersgirl · 6 months

Text

So like... truly not a single individual asked for even anything remotely this but I've had it sitting partially unfinished in my drafts since the day I started this blog. I'm debating turning it into like a 3ish part mini-series but please do let me know if you guys think I should just leave it alone or keep going! If I did continue this, know that future parts would be juicier and likely include a bit of angst as it would kind of work perfectly with a request I have in my inbox!

Without further adieu, I hope you enjoy :)

Something More

Harvey Specter x Reader

--------

You were in such a rush to get to work that you hadn’t bothered to check your phone until you were already on the train and headed to your office. If you had, maybe you would’ve put a bit more attention into your appearance on that particular day. Once you were in your seat, you finally pulled out your phone and noticed a rather… compelling message from none other than Harvey Specter. Your heart nearly beat out of your chest.

You’d very recently become a junior partner at the firm, which meant you’d be working just a bit more closely with him than when you were simply an associate. This thought both excited you and also freaked you out just a little. Harvey was the biggest of the big dogs in corporate law, and to say you weren't intimidated would simply be a lie.

The message Harvey had sent you was simple, as he didn’t tend to beat around the bush or waste any time when it came to much of anything.

“Come see me when you get in, I want to chat. Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble. Oh, and there’s something waiting for you in your office.”

You pictured the smirk he had while typing out that message, knowing he'd made you nervous.

You fluffed up your hair a little and checked your lipgloss in the reflection of your front camera and before you knew it, you found yourself pressing the elevator button up to Pearson Specter, and clicking your heels as you walked to Harvey’s office. You decided to go straight there, wanting to get whatever this was out of the way. You paused when you reached Donna’s desk, unsure of whether or not you needed to check in with her first. You'd never been summoned to Harvey's office before.

“You can go right on in, hon. He already told me he’s expecting you.” She said with a slight smile, not even needing to look up from her screen to see who was there.

“H-how’d you know it was me?” You asked, visibly thrown off by her skill. You didn't have a ton of interaction with Donna when you were an associate, only here and there and you’d heard she was good at this type of thing, but damn.

She looked up and gave you the “Do you really have to ask me that” face.

“Right. Thanks, Donna” you said as you turned toward Harvey’s office, only slightly embarrassed.

You knocked on his door, which sat slightly ajar. He was reading from a file folder, but closed it when he saw you enter.

“She Donna’d you, didn’t she?” He asked with amusement present in his tone.

“That she did. But umm, you... wanted to see me?" Your stomach was doing flips, despite him saying you weren't in any trouble, you felt like you were anyway.

He smiled, gesturing at the seat in front of him at his desk. You cautiously sat down, your guard still up.

“I told you, you're not in trouble. You can relax, Y/N. I don't bite. I just wanted to congratulate you personally on making junior partner. I know we’ve never really crossed paths much since you started here, but I really look forward to getting to know you. From what I've heard, you do great work, Y/N. It definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by me, or any of the senior staff. You’re going to do great things here.” He said earnestly.

You were floored. Of anything you expected Harvey to call you into his office for, this wouldn’t have even cracked your top 20 guesses. Up until your promotion, you weren’t even confident he knew your name let alone knew about and recognized the hard work you constantly put in.

“O-oh! Really? Thank you! That means everything coming from you.” You replied.

"Of course 'really', I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it." He said with a chuckle.

You relaxed your shoulders and sunk a tiny bit lower in your seat.

Harvey opened his mouth to say something else, but as he did, Donna poked her head in to let him know he had a call from a client.

You quickly stood up and smoothed your dress out.

“I’ll let you take that, but thank you again, Harvey. I really appreciate it.” You told him.

He smiled warmly and stood now, too, walking you the few feet to his doorway. You mentally noted how gentlemanly this was, saving the thought for later.

By the time you got to your office you had completely forgotten the other part of Harvey's message from earlier, that he had left something on your desk. Neatly placed in front of your laptop was the most beautiful bouquet of flowers you’d ever seen, and a stack of business cards, embossed with your name and the new title. A post-it note sat on top of them with “Congrats!” written in Harvey’s handwriting. You smiled widely. To you, even these cards meant more than you could possibly describe. They were a physical manifestation of all the hard work you'd put in, everything you'd gone through and overcame. As for the flowers, well, they definitely were a shock to you. You didn’t take Harvey as a flowers guy.

You settled into your desk chair, smiling down at the stack of cards before signing into your computer, and getting started on the slightly mountainous pile of work you had to take care of. With a promotion of course came more cases and harder work, but regardless, you were still glad to have been promoted.

You were deep in your laptop typing up a brief for one of your cases when you noticed a presence standing in your doorway.

“Oh, Harvey! Hey, sorry I was just in my head. I was going to come by earlier and thank you for the flowers and the cards. They’re beautiful”

Harvey grinned and nodded his head.

“Of course, you deserve them! Though I can’t exactly take credit for the floral arrangement… that was all Donna.”

“What can Donna not do?”

“I’ve been asking myself that for the last twelve years."

"Did I hear my name?" Donna said, appearing seemingly out of nowhere and making Harvey nearly jump out of his skin.

You smiled brightly, greeting the redhead and thanking her for the flowers. She lit up and told you all about her florist, telling you she'd get you a business card asap.

As the week went on, you found yourself having more run-in's like this with Harvey than you'd had in the entirety of your employment at the firm. Surely it was a coincidence, or at least that's what you'd convinced yourself anyway.

The remaining Harvey-free parts of your week didn't nearly live up to how your first morning as a partner had gone. You had been hitting dead end after dead end in all your cases and nothing was going the way you'd planned. The deposition you had scheduled for Friday got moved, so at the very least, you were able to head home a little earlier than you planned. You were wrapping up and grabbing your coat when a knock on your office door made you jump, the tension from your rather hellish week still rattling you.

"Hey sorry to scare you, I just wanted to see how your first official week as a junior partner went?"

You huffed a sigh in response, not wanting to make a big deal out of the tough day that surely you'd get over.

Harvey chuckled at this.

"That bad, huh?"

"I'll be fine, I’ll get it figured out it’s just everything I tried to do went exactly the opposite of how I wanted it to go."

"I would tell you we've all been there, but I wouldn't want to lie to you," Harvey replied, smirking as he straightened his tie. "Harvey Specter always gets what he wants"

"Mmm, I'm sure he does.” You mused. “Well Harvey, as much as I'd like to chat more, I was about to head home and have a very large, very strong drink."

"Funny, I was about to ask if you'd like to join me for a drink."

You paused for a beat, weighing the pros and cons of going for a drink with Harvey. On one hand, he was technically your boss and it wouldn't be the worst idea to get to know him better. On the other, it made you a little nervous having any alcohol in your system around him. For totally work-related reasons, of course, and no other reasons.

"Fuck it," you thought to yourself. "live a little."

“You know what Harvey? Sure. I'd like that.”

Harvey grinned in a way that made your stomach erupt with butterflies.

"Good, let's get out of here." He said, grabbing your coat off the coat rack and handing it to you.

You grabbed it from him, put your bag over your shoulder and flicked the lamp on your desk off.

Harvey stood by the door to your office, holding it open and letting you go first.

"Wow, and to think just yesterday I thought you were only a pretty boy with an ego. Harvey Specter is actually a gentleman?" You questioned teasingly. Harvey raised an eyebrow, smirking as you both walked toward the elevators.

"All I'm hearing is that you think I'm pretty"

"Not the point, Specter."

"It's the only point I caught. Did you say something else?"

"And suddenly I'm regretting saying yes to you"

Harvey chuckled now, pressing the lobby button as the elevator doors closed.

Not an hour later, the two of you were seated at a small table in whatever fancy bar it was that Harvey had taken you to. You'd forgotten the name, but apparently, it was somewhere Harvey frequented if the exceptional treatment from the staff and the fact that they knew his name was any indication.

You ordered the drink you always ordered, a whiskey ginger with a lime, and Harvey nodded approvingly before ordering his own drink.

Once your server walked away, he turned to you with an impressed look on his face.

"You're a whiskey girl?"

You shrugged. "I've become one, I used to be a vodka girl in college though." You said with a giggle, remembering all the nights stumbling home from parties with your college roommate after way too many vodka lemonades.

"I was a 'whatever gets me drunk the fastest' guy myself," Harvey said, making you both laugh. Your drinks arrived and you held your glass up to cheers before taking the first sip.

You were surprisingly having a great time with Harvey, he was really getting to know you and you were even able to squeeze a few stories out of him, too. As time passed and the more drinks you had, the more you let your guard down and finally admitted to yourself that Harvey wasn't the same cocky guy you'd heard about from the rest of the world. He'd already started to show this in the workplace, but now that all the stress of the office was gone maybe, just maybe, you were even starting to admit to yourself that you wanted something else between the two of you. You pondered this while Harvey ordered another drink for each of you, your fourth of the night.

"Okay that'll have to be my last one, I can assure you, you don't want to see drunk Y/N this early into knowing me. She can be a handful" You warned with a smile.

Harvey chuckled in response, nodding in understanding.

You each sipped your drinks as you chatted some more, giving him some more bits and pieces about your life.

Harvey flagged down the server when you were both finished and before you could even offer to pay for your drinks, Harvey had already handed over his Amex.

"You didn't have to do that, I'm more than capable of buying my own drinks." You stated, standing and draping your coat over your arm. The heat from your slight intoxication warming you enough as it was. Harvey followed your lead, standing from his own chair before responding. He stepped slightly forward, much closer to you.

"I know you are, I just wanted to celebrate you making junior partner and show you that I really enjoyed your company tonight," Harvey said softly, a genuine smile on his face.

Your cheeks felt like they were on fire at his admission, and at the lack of distance.

"I happened to enjoy your company too."

You knew it was risky, and likely unrequited, to feel the way you felt right there in that busy yet intimate bar. You rationally knew that he probably was just being nice because he wanted to get to know you better for working purposes, but the drinks you'd had were starting to catch up with you and you didn't know how long you'd be able to take this closeness.

Harvey spoke, interrupting your train of thought.

"Look, I know it might cause some talk around the office, but I'd like to have something more with you. So, if you're feeling what I'm feeling, I'd really like to see you again. I mean, I'll see you at work obviously. But I'd like to take you out again, more planned this time-" He stammered, making you smile.

"Harvey?"

"Hmm?"

"Stop talking."

Before you could think twice you were pulling him close, planting your lips on his, and he wasted no time returning the gesture. When you finally pulled away, slightly out of breath, Harvey tucked your hair behind your ear.

"So is that a yes?"

"That's definitely a yes."

#harvey specter #harvey specter x reader #suits fics #harveyspecter #harvey specter suits #suits #NOT A REQUEST omg who am I

272 notes · View notes

inthelittlewood · 1 year

Note

Just wanted to thank you really quickly.

I was raised in a very “men aren’t meant to be emotional” type household. I’ve been watching you for awhile, and especially today seeing a man be able to cry on camera and talk about dark periods in life and going to therapy and such… i dunno. it means a lot to me

No worries dude! No need to thank me. It's how we all should operate (or feel comfortable enough to do so) in an ideal world tbh.

I've always prided myself on being transparent with my audience and those around me irl.

I've learned over the years to not second guess myself when it comes to honesty. I've had friends come to me for advice and I'll give it to them straight, worded compassionately, but truthful.

Same for business too, I've had run ins with marketing teams, sponsors and production companies where instead of saying "I'm fine" at the time then avoiding working with them in the future, I'll actually be up front about what went wrong. Surprisingly, they've almost always come back with an understanding ear, fixed those issues and its meant I felt happy to work with them again.

Authenticity is something you'll hear people preach about and it always sounds like a buzzword, but it genuinely is the best vehicle towards happiness. It relieves you of future thoughts of "what if" or "oh god, why did I do that" - you can leave every encounter knowing you put your best foot forward at the time. No regrets to be had.

Keep being real and wearing your heart on your sleeve!! <3

420 notes · View notes

qiutls · 9 months

Text

TNGDH 021

After doing it a few times during the festival, it was now easy to avoid Kyle's eyes and turn into a person. In the first place, except for that day when I met with Sen, I've been spending hours together with him, so I had no time to worry about getting caught.

"You're a magician?"

"Yes, but I'm not that talented, I just do this and that..."

"I see."

I drank the tea and ate the scones he prepared while I lied nonchalantly.

I'm sorry for lying but it's better this way, just in case I need a cover-up in the future.

If Kyle goes on an expedition, there would be a good excuse to accompany him. If he goes on to subjugate demonic beasts as written in the novel, as a magician, I can go with him.

"Rather than that, can you really spend time with me like this? Don't you have any work to do?"

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No....."

I'm not making you leave ah. I'm just wondering if you're really this free. It seems like the grand duke has a suspicion disease after I disappeared unexpectedly twice.

I turned my head, slightly guilty at the situation. Then his hand reached out and turned my face back to look at him.

"It's polite to look at each other's face while talking."

"I'm sorry I'm a man who isn't well versed in aristocratic manners."

"You should learn from now on."

"Why should I?"

He came closer and whispered.

"Aren't you my companion?"

A sin committed once lasts a lifetime. I looked at him miserably.

'How many times has it been now?'

Even beef bones won't be used as much as Kyle uses this companion comment. He has been using it to blackmail me whenever I tried to avoid answering his questions or to leave early.

You're someone who died without a companion in the original novel. Is that why you're obsessed with companions? To be honest, it's not that you didn't want to date anyone, it's that you couldn't right?

My mouth was itching to shoot back the comment at him but I forced myself to hold it in. Kyle who has been staring at me suddenly let out an airless laugh. He had a strange yet comforting smile plastered on his face. His bright expression pulled me in and before I knew it I had been staring at him as well.

"I feel comfortable with you."

"....."

"I know it probably sounds strange, don't think too much about it."

I have nothing to say if you tell me those words with such a soft smile.

Are you doing this on purpose?

I couldn't do anything except stare at him, I only came to my senses when he offered another scone to me.

"Since you're a magician, can you take a look at my magical beast? You can take a look at it whenever you're free."

I was about to bite into the scone then stopped after hearing Kyle's unexpected words.....That's strange. Did you just ask me, to take a look after.....ME?

I put down the scone and asked him again, this time listening with full attention.

"...What?"

"I asked if you could take a look at the magical beast I'm raising in the study."

I guess I didn't hear it wrong.

Looking alternately at the scone in my hand and at Kyle, my appetite dropped. Even though the desert looked delicious, I felt like I would get an upset stomach if I ate it now.

But Kyle didn't seem to mind my actions and continued pensively.

"I'm worried because he doesn't seem to have any appetite recently. And he's been lazy as well. He used to be a very active guy..."

Don't edit your memories ah! When have I been active? Apart from running on the wheel in order to get the skill, I was always lying down! You don't even know your own hamster.

"I think it's because, it's already in the growing stage, yet there's no signs of a mana stone forming inside him. I decided to periodically inject magic power (mana) as advised by the doctor but..."

".....Magic power?"

What's this? Who told you to do that?

"Since it's inevitable that it will suffer from the mana injected, I thought it would be a good idea to let you meet it and see if you can help."

"What...."

What? What's this situation?!

I can't even say no to his requests..... I closed my mouth and urgently called the system.

Hey! HEY! Hurry up and come here!

[ ……(*￣０￣)ノ ]

Why do you look like you've just woken up? I clenched my fist and looked at the blue system window in front of me.

'Hurry up and navigate to the Fruit Store or whatever it's called!'

[ ……. ] [ ……. ] [ ☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆ ] [ The Nut Store! ]

After a bit of loading, the shiny emoji came into my vision. I clicked my tongue upon seeing the decorated sign below it. Don't you get tired doing all of this?

I ignored the small letters that said renewal open and quickly scanned the store.

[ Mini mini Brazil Nut Madeleine, consumes 2% miracle value, in turn your body gets smaller for 30 minutes. It's even smaller than a hamster! ]

[ Hurried Almond Financier, consumes 3% miracle value, in turn you're able to run faster than usual. ]

Give me something useful please, what's the point of these items ah? If I wanted to be small, I'll just turn back into a hamster.

I finished reading page 1 and was about to turn into page 2 when I heard Kyle sigh.

"A magician, you say..."

"What are you thinking about, Your Highness?"

"I just thought, it's quite a relief."

"Why?"

"There has always been a shortage of magicians in the Blake estate. It hasn't been long since I became the leader, and I've had a lot of accidents at the Wyvern nest survey last year."

He looked at me expectantly.

No, I can't think of an excuse. Stop looking at me with such a face. How am I supposed to hold my ground, my expression turned to guilt.

I moved my hand to cover his eyes, but of course my feeble efforts were rendered useless in just three seconds as Kyle held my wrist in place.

"The work at the estate is hard. I'm really so busy these days."

I made a vague excuse first, just in case he asks for another favor.

Even though the "Summon" skill was upgraded, it was only up to two hours. I can't do much with the time I'm given, and it's not like I can lie everyday that I need to go to the bathroom before I disappear again.

"....Is that so?"

Kyle's face was tinted with disappointment. I felt apologetic seeing this unfamiliar expression on him.

Why are you so disappointed ah? I'm a fake magician who can't even do basic spells. The only spell I know is how to turn into your hamster, Cashew Nut.

'Can you even consider that as a magic spell?'

The system just transforms me back and forth.

In any case, it's better to find a magician who's actually knowledgeable, rather than choosing me. But still... If you're this disappointed.

I added gently, as if teeming with good intentions.

"There's still enough time to look for magicians before the demonic beasts' subjugation expedition happens."

There was something that came to mind after I said that sentence.

The Northern festival was held during the coldest and darkest days of winter. After this tumultuous atmosphere, the Blake estate started preparing for a massive reconnaissance.

There are many reasons for this reconnaissance, the main purpose was to bring back the vigilance that was loosened during the festival. It was a reminder that no matter how good the life in the North is, it is still a dangerous place full of demonic beasts.

Another reason is probably the training of the newly inaugurated knights. At this time of the year, knights who were apprentices in the past will get to experience combat since their inauguration.

"The ceremony for the new knights....."

Kyle replied slowly,

"We did it during the festival, I remember it was pretty big this year since there was a lot of new recruits."

"Haha... I think I was pretty busy back then."

Kyle glanced at me suspiciously. I know I didn't have anything to be busy about, but just forget about it, let's move on! I ignored his piercing gaze as I recounted the events.

A knight's inauguration that was larger than usual.

The chandelier dropping in the middle of the banquet.

And then, a large scale reconnaissance.

I'm pretty sure at this time, Kyle...

[ The Duke of Blake is attacked during the reconnaissance and suffers a heavy injury on his right arm. ]

The system narrated the content from the original novel.

I asked a question quietly.

'Will this injury, affect how he dies?'

After a moment of silence, the system answered succinctly.

[ That's right. ]

The sentence shone brightly in blue and it gave me chills. His fated death struck me with renewed vividness.

'Right...'

Kyle's death is now just 15 days away.

According to the original story, he started to confront Belial through the chandelier incident, and was attacked at the reconnaissance. Then he was stabbed to death by a strong man at his own castle.

Just because I changed a small part of the plot, doesn't mean I changed his fate entirely. Miracles don't happen that easily.

What now... What should I do?

"Hey."

"....."

"Shu."

"....."

"Shu!"

Kyle put his palms around my cheeks and I came to my senses when his cold hands touched my skin.

"Ah."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

I took a quick breath and tried to move my stiff fingertips.

"I'm alright."

He didn't seem to believe my words, but he didn't pressure me into confessing.

"I was just thinking about something for a moment."

Kyle frowned at my words.

"What were you thinking about that made you so pale?"

I couldn't answer honestly so I just shut my mouth.

Come to think of it, I always avoided his questions this way. Either I start talking fast, saying random excuses or I just shut up entirely. It must look suspicious.

But it can't be helped. Anyways, I changed the subject as naturally as I could and leaked the plan I had in mind in advance.

"Your Highness, may I follow you on this large-scaled reconnaissance?"

He answered straight away, as if it was not a difficult decision.

"Sure, but have you ever been outside the territory?"

"No."

"The north is much more dangerous than you think. At the snowfield, humans are the first learn how weak they are."

"....."

The outside, is entirely different from the Blake estate, as the grand duke described.

I gulped down and looked him in the eye.

"It will all be alright if Your Highness is there to protect me."

Protect me, Kyle, and I'll protect you. You might not know, but our fates are linked. Our survival depends on each other.

Kyle whispered back.

"Do you trust me?"

"Isn't it natural that the people of this land trusts you?"

"I know."

He said with a mischievous smile on his face.

"But I was asking you."

Acting like a hooligan. You already know the answer.

I squinted at him, pretending to look hateful.

"Of course."

"All right, I'll be responsible in protecting you, but, how are your horseback riding skills?"

"Ah."

Well how should I explain this... During our school trip, they went to Jeju Island and everyone rode a pony, but I was left behind doing homework at school.

Before I could answer anything, he added.

"Actually, it would be difficult to ride alone with your injury."

Fortunately, he didn't seem to think of leaving me behind.

But wait, what? Don't tell me? You're thinking of giving me a ride?! In front of all the new recruits??? Wait, no!

'.....Should I not have told him that I wanted to join?'

I bit my lips in order to calm down the goosebumps on my arms.

"....Thank you for being considerate, Your Highness."

When he leaves, I must learn horseback riding immediately!

t/n : longest chapter yet! thank u for all the ko-fis~ also posting twice today since I might not be able to do so tomorrow!

#tngdh

232 notes · View notes

gingiesworld · 7 months

Text

Love is Gone

Natasha Romanoff x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst. Unhappy ending

18+ MINORS DNI

AN: Thank you guys for 1k followers. So this is here in celebration for you awesome people. Also I don't think I can move away from writing sad Nat fics.

Both Y/N and Natasha lay side by side on their once shared bed. The closet door was open as Nat's clothes were all being packed away, along with her belongings. The argument leading up to this moment still clear as day in both of their minds.

Then

The two walked inside the apartment, a heavy tension surrounding the two as Y/N kept replaying the words they had heard her say to one of her closest friends at a party. Nat watched as Y/N headed towards the fridge to grab a beer before they turned to face her.

"So are you going to keep stringing me along or put me out of my misery." They asked her calmly as they took a sip of their beer.

"Y/N." Nat started but Y/N just laughed at her, seeing how she was trying so hard to save herself.

"You know how you made me look to our friends? You made me seem unloveable." Y/N stated as they placed the bottle down on the counter. "Even hearing you say it to them when you thought I wouldn't hear. Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I don't know." Nat started as they just nodded. "I guess I was comfortable in what we have and I didn't want to lose that."

"But you don't love me anymore." They stated dryly. "That's what you told Wanda. You told her you care about me more as a friend."

"I just." Nat tried to think of ways to take it all back as her heart beat loudly in her ears. "I can't explain it but I don't feel the same as I used to."

"So just end it! Don't string me along thinking that we have a future together!" They yelled. "Don't keep this going up to the point I buy a ring and get down on one knee!"

"You were going to propose?" She whispered as Y/N pulled the small box from their pocket and placed it on the side.

"I was going to do it tonight, when we got home." They told her. "I had a plan for it all but now that isn't needed and saves me a headache." They chuckled dryly.

"I'm so sorry Y/N." She whispered as they nodded before heading towards their room with her on their heels. She watched as they grabbed her luggage and started to pack her bags.

"It's done now." They stated as they focused on the task at hand. "We're done so you don't have to keep pretending to care about me."

"Y/N." She reached for their hand that remained on the zipper. "Lay with me. One last time."

Now

It was hours as Y/N looked into her eyes, remembering how different they seem to them now. They used to find love and peace whenever they used to gaze into them, but now all they feel is despair and pain.

"Where will you go?" They asked her, even though their heart is breaking, they still worry about her.

"Yelena's." She told them as she reached for their face. Her fingers tracing their features as it took everything within them not to flinch under her touch. "Just until I can get my own place."

"Good." Y/N whispered as they moved to lay on their back. "We should finish packing your things." Nat watched as they got up and continued their task. It was pressing on 4am when they had finished packing. The ring still sat on the kitchen counter as Y/N moved to lay on the sofa, leaving the bed for Natasha. The two lay staring at the ceiling as the morning wore on, neither sleeping before Y/N had left. Leaving Natasha to pack her car before she headed to stay with her sister for the unforseeable future.

"So she's gone?" Bucky questioned as he stood with Y/N who had decided to redecorate all of a sudden.

"Yup." They told him. "And I am decorating."

"You were going to propose." He stated as he held the ring box in his hands.

"Last night after the party. I had it all planned Buck." They told him. "I had the roof set up and I was going to do it when we came home. Under the stars but I heard her, everything she said about me. Everything about not loving me. She still cares about me as a friend but she doesn't love me."

"Y/N, maybe you should give yourself time." He suggested as Y/N shook their head no.

"I can't do that, we have the same friends Buck. We will still see each other and I am asking for a transfer. Out of state." They told him before turning to finish their task at hand. "I need to leave New York and move on and I can't move on here."

"But what about the rest of us?" He asked them sadly.

"I'm going to rent to Peter, he is just starting school and it's a good price for him and I will still have my room here for when I visit." They told him. "Especially for yours and Steve's wedding." They smirked as he shook his head.

Once Y/N had left New York, word had gotten to Nat who had started to feel guilty. Everything that she used to love about the state had started to suffocate her. Even her sister was disappointed in her with how she led Y/N on.

"It's my fault they've left." Nat stated as she sat on her sister's sofa. "I ran them out of the city."

"Yeah it is your fault." Yelena agreed. "Maybe if you were honest to the both of you, they would still be here."

"I know." Nat whispered as she covered her face with her hands.

As the months went on, Y/N had settled in the new office in California. What they never expected was to run into an old face they hadn't seen since that night. The two had soon started to talk as she stayed in California, helping with her parents cafè.

Even though Y/N had thought that they wouldn't be happy again, they started to feel whole again with the more time they spent with her, they started to fall for her.

"Are you going back to New York for Bucky's wedding?" She asked them as they walked through the streets of LA.

"Of course." They confirmed with a smile. "He is my best friend." They stopped their movements as they turned to face her. "Would you be my date?" They asked her. "I know this may seem sudden but I just, I really like you Wanda and being here with you has been like a breath of fresh air."

"I would love to be your date." She told them with a bright smile and a kiss upon their cheek before they walked her home. Even as the wedding came closer, Y/N and Wanda had spent most of their spare time together. Even sharing their first kiss on her doorstep, leaving the two blushing as she went inside.

So as they entered the venue, Wanda gave their hand a squeeze. She knew of their feelings about New York but she knew they would never let their friend down, regardless of their feelings.

"Are you ok?" Wanda whispered as the two soon spotted a now red head.

"Yeah." Y/N gave her a genuine smile. "I am great actually." Wanda kissed their lips softly before the ceremony begun. Watching as their best friend married his soul mate, a smile on their face at the happy union. Even as their eyes met those green eyes they used to love, they didn't feel pain or despair. There was no longing or love. Their was nothing really, they never felt anything towards Natasha, not anymore. At the realisation, they kissed Wanda's head as the newly weds walked down the aisle arm in arm as everyone applauded.

"That was beautiful." Wanda told them with a smile.

"It was." They heard Natasha speak from behind them. "So, you two are together?" She questioned as Y/N smiled tenderly at Wanda.

"We are." They answered her question. "Going on three months now."

"You both look happy." Nat observed as the two nodded. Wanda went away to get some drinks, leaving the two exes together.

"You know, I was worried about seeing you again, I thought all of that pain would return when I saw you." Y/N started as they looked Natasha in the eye. "But I don't feel anything. I truly have moved on from you, even if I thought it would be impossible to do, but I have Wanda and I am falling for her."

"Do you see a future with her like you did me?" Nat questioned.

"Not like I did you." Y/N told her. "I actually see Wanda and I growing old together. Having a family together. I see a future set in stone with her. I never had that with you. I only ever saw marrying you and nothing more."

"I'm happy for you both." Nat swallowed dryly. "Just make sure you both make each other happy." With that, she walked away as Wanda was making her way with the drinks. In that moment, she knew that there was no love left between the old lovers, just distant memories of what used to be.

#natasha romanoff imagine #natasha marvel #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff au #wanda fanfic #wanda marvel #wanda maximoff #bucky barnes #yelena boleva #1k followers

191 notes · View notes

darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 3 months

Text

Dirty Work 17

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as bullying, familial discord/abuse, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You start a new gig and find one of your clients to be hard to please.

Characters: Loki

Note: It's friday again.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

Once Leslie leaves, you lock yourself away again. Your father's taken to the cold shoulder over his previous aggression. You don't mind, it assures you of a tenuous peace. So long as you don't draw his attention, you're okay.

Your anxiety remains piqued. Not only by your father's stewing ire but the thought of what looms both behind and ahead of you. With all that happened at work, you have little hope of tomorrow being better. There is also the question of Mr. Laufeyson's surprise... you can't even begin to guess what he has in mind.

Another test, no doubt. Like today. You're certain you failed that one too. You took his kindness and showed yourself to be ungrateful. You questioned him when you should have just accepted it with a smile on your face.

It is not your place to worry about his intentions, as he has made it clear, you are not on the same level. He is your boss and you do what he says. So you will do that and nothing more.

Is that his voice in your head?

You sneak out for a shower but it doesn't do much to calms your nerves. You spend another night tossing and turn, kept awake by the television set a top volume and the dissonance of your anxiety. Even with the extra hours granted, you find yourself painfully awake at the same splitting hour.

You get up to make your tea. Your father's snoring on the couch at the TV continues to blare. You don't disturb either as you put on the kettle and ready a mug. You rub your eyes and yawn. Leslie will be here soon. You should wake him and get breakfast going. It will lighten her load.

When you have your cup steaming, you stay at the counter and sip tentatively, weighing your next steps. You leave your father as he is and return to your room, dressing and cleaning up before you descend again. You have your phone in hand, almost hoping a notification will pop up. Maybe Mr. Laufeyson will change his mind and you can be off before you have to face your dad. The phone remains lifeless.

You sigh and shut off the television, hoping the sudden silence might rouse him. He continues to snort loudly. You bite down on your cheeks as your skin buzzes and itches. He's not a morning person.

The memories of him exploding to consciousness in a furor of hollers and kicks keep you from shaking him. You back away as the doorbell rings and does the job for you, your father grumbling as you go to answer it.

Leslie enters with her usual blustering brightness. She greets your father and stops short, hands on her hips as she tuts.

"Now what is the meaning of this?" She huffs, "Charles, you can't sleep down here."

"I'm not," he sits up and hacks into his hand before sliding the oxygen tube back into place. "You woke me up."

"What's gotten into you?" She accuses, "I told you yesterday I'm not here for your attitude. You're not some teenager, you're a grown man."

"Bah, I need coffee," he snarls.

"You need a cold shower," she retorts as she goes around the couch and snatches up the pack of smoke on the cushion beside him, "and a swat on the snout. What're you doing with these things?" She pauses and looks at you, "he can't be having these in the house."

"I don't... know where they came from," your murmur.

"Don't matter, if you see them, you toss them," she reproaches, "this is a team effort, alright? Now yesterday, this place was a right mess. I'm here to help, not play maid."

"I'm sorry, I..." you snap your mouth shut. You did clean up, as best you could before work, but you'll have to do better.

"Not her fault she's useless," your father quips.

"Charles," Leslie warns as she points at him.

"Sorry, hon," he puts his hands up, "was only a joke."

"Not a very nice one," he rebukes.

"I know, I know," he chortles.

"So don't apologise to me," she flicks her finger towards you.

Your father stops his laughing and quiets. He crosses his arms and slumps his shoulders as you stare at the back of his head. You wait as Leslie tilts her head dangerous and cross her arms.

"Charles," she girds.

"Don't worry about it," you croak, "it's fine. I'll... I'm going in late so I'll get breakfast started."

"Oh yeah, she don't gotta go polish that man's silver early," your dad growls.

"Charles," Leslie snips again, "I mean it, be nice."

"I am nice, hon, I'm being funny."

"You are not," she insists.

"Come on, Les," he lowers his voice as you pad towards the kitchen, "I'll be good, alright? Don't give me that look."

She sighs but you don't look back, "alright, no more smokes."

"I'm tellin' ya, honey," he speaks so softly you barely recognise his voice, "I didn't touch 'em. Found them in the couch but I didn't smoke any. Don't be mad at me."

You shake your head and try to roll the tension out of your shoulders. She's been here just over a week and he talks like he's known her forever. He's actually nice to her. He cares about what she thinks, what she feels. But you, his own daughter, you get the blame for it all. You're the reason he hates himself and his life. Maybe if you'd never come along, he'd still have the woman he loved.

🧹

You set off just after eleven, the bus due not long after. As you come down the overgrown walk with its cracked pavement and uneven tilt, your eyes are drawn up by the snap of a car door. Footfalls scuff on the pavement as you look over the curb to the shiny car parked there. It's an unusual sight in the rundown neighbourhood.

Mr. Laufeyson proudly steps up as the window on the passenger's side rolls down. A pair of similarly green eyes peer out as she takes in the sight of the yellow duplex. You want to run and hide. You can't imagine either of them ever had to dirty themselves in a place like this.

"Mr. Laufeyson," you rush towards him, "I--- you said noon."

You pull the phone out and check the time. He puts his hand on the roof of the car calmly as you stop a few feet away. He chuckles, amused by your panic.

"It's so quaint," Frigga remarks as she remains firmly in the front seat, "dear, how are you?"

"Um, I'm well, Frigga," you answer with a tight gulp.

"Good, good, you look well," she praises, "a bit tired. Tell me he's not overworking you."

"Mother," Laufeyson shoots a glance in her direction.

"Er, it's fine," you clutch the strap of your bag, "I... did I do something?"

"No, no," Frigga waves off your suspicion, "I simply insisted my son bring me to see you while I'm in town."

"Oh, I was just on my way..." you look at Laufeyson confused as he gives an expression you can't quite read. He's expecting something but you're not sure what.

"We have lots to do so no sense in waiting around," she trills.

"Oh?" Your lips part. "Did something-- is the house okay?"

"The house is just fine. That old place only needs a little light, but see if my own son hears me," he rambles, "Loki, don't be rude, get the door."

He flinches and drags his hand away from the top of the car, "yes, mother."

He moves to open the back door, gallantly opening it for you. You feel like you've been dropped into an alternate universe. This can't be happening.

"Get in," he says.

You blink at him and he tilts his head, gesturing to the back seat. You obey with some reluctance and sit the large leather bag beside you. You slowly pull the seat belt down and click it into place. Laufeyson strides around the bumper as you peek in the mirror at Frigga's silvering curls.

"Right, then," Laufeyson opens the driver's door and lowers himself into the seat, "there we are."

"How are you feeling, darling?" Frigga's eyes meet yours in the rearview before you quickly look away, "are you very hungry or can you wait a bit longer for lunch?"

"I... Lunch? I'm okay," you assure. You can't figure this out. "Thank you."

The car whirs and rolls into motion. You're uneasy as you watch the street pass by. If he takes a left, he can get back to the main roads and-- no, he's going right?

"Mm, alright, the boutique first then," she orders her son, "I'm wondering if perhaps they could squeeze us in at the spa. It has been a while since I had some clay done. Oh, and my nails are ragged."

You try to connect the dots as your brows stitch together. Is this his surprise? His mother? Why are you there? You should be figuring out what's going on with the squeaky hinge on the closet.

"I can't wait to see the new season's colours," Frigga carries on as you tune her out, lost in the riddle of her presence and your own.

Surely, you're being brought along as some sort of valet. Of course, Laufeyson would offer you to carry her bags as she splurges on her pretty dresses. And she is always dressed so nicely whenever you see her. And make up, her lips are a pleasant shade of rose. She would likely spend even more on shoes, don't forget the silver sparkling at her throat and the gemstone dangling there...

Right, you see. Another lesson. He wants you to remember what you don't have. After your slip-up yesterday, he has to remind you of where you belong; squashed under his sole.

"Oh, is Eliana still at the salon, I should stop in and say hello," Frigga's voice once more punctures your distraction. "She was always so sweet."

"Mother, I... don't know about that. Maybe a different salon."

"You are such a pessimist, what are the odds we run into her?"

"Don't even tempt fate," he warns.

"No one said you were invited, hm? You said you had business down at Heimdall's."

"You are stubborn, mother," Laufeyson tisks.

"It's where you got it from, dear," she taunts, "so, darling," she peeks in the mirror again and you shy away, "how about it, you and I? It will be so nice. I haven't gotten a day out in so long."

"Oh, you haven't? Should I ask father about that?"

"Let's not mention your father," she rebuffs him smoothly and his shoulders slump.

"Um, well, that's nice, but..." you protest meekly

"It's my treat," she insists, "please. You're doing me a favour."

"I really don't know--"

"I don't mind," Laufeyson interjects, "and it won't affect your hours."

"I did soften him up a bit," she purrs.

"Mother," he hisses again.

"Oh you are so serious," she chides, "she needs this more than I do, I'm sure, with a stickler like you."

He twitches but says nothing. You sense he wants to say it again, 'mother', in the tone of please be quiet. It would be laughable if you weren't so perplexed by it all. Maybe it is a dream. Maybe you didn't wake up and you're oversleeping your alarm, having stress dreams about what will happen when you wake to reality.

"He's a good little chauffeur," she pats his arm playfully, "so he will drop us at the salon, won't you, dearest son?"

He grips the wheel tight and you see his knuckles turn almost translucent, "yes, mother, whatever you wish."

🧹

Mr, Laufeyson drives through the downtown area. You don't come there much, or at all. You passed through on your way to the hospital and on occasion to sort out a billing issue with the bank, but there wasn't much for you there. Along the west side, the nicer shops reside and several buildings with businesses you could never figure out.

Laufeyson pulls up into a marked spot beside a meter. As you stare out, still puzzled by it all. Everything's going so fast and you just want it to slow down. You look at your boss and feel a pang in your chest; how many times had he mentioned your clothes? This isn't a favour, this is him saying you're not good enough.

"Come, come," Frigga gets out and opens your door for you, "let's not drag our feet."

You undo the seat belt and go to grab your large leather bag. As you get out, Frigga catches you by the shoulders. "You won't need this," she takes the bag and reaches past you to put it back in the car, "only your pretty self."

"Oh, uh, sure, okay," you look again at Laufeyson but you're not sure why. He isn't going to help you. He's plunged you into this situation. He only arches a brow in response.

"Just going to give you a nice refresh," Frigga pulls on your elbow and shuts the door, tugging you onto the pavement. "You would do wonderful with some highlights."

You stumble along beside her, overwhelmed by her enthusiasm. She directs you to the shining transparent windows of a salon, a sign overhead with a curled iron bar across the top. You peek over your shoulder again as Mr. Laufeyson lingers another moment before steering out into traffic.

The door chirps as it opens and you're ushered inside to the sound of jazzy pop covers. You can't choose where to focus as the sleek shelves of colourful bottle behind the pure white counter refracts the lights of a spindly chandelier. Velvet chairs are arranged around a table in the little waiting area as stylists gab with clients in chairs.

"Frigga," a woman with platinum locks flutters over with the clacking of heels, "oh, it's been so long."

"Eliana! It has, look at you," they embrace and part, Frigga playing with the tall woman's pin-straight tresses, "what happened to the black?"

"Got a few grays and a divorce," the woman, Eliana you presume, cackles, "and who's this?"

They look at you as you're ready to fade into the black and white stripes on the wall.

"Oh, a friend, she's lovely," Frigga comes back and takes your hand, drawing you forward, "she just needs a little touch-up."

"Oh, she's a natural, she won't need much at all," the stylist approaches you, "I know just the woman; Luciana," she claps and looks back, "I have someone to fill in that cancellation.”

#loki #dark loki #dark!loki #loki x reader #fic #dark fic #dark!fic #series #au #maid au #dirty work #mcu #marvel #avengers #thor

251 notes · View notes

mylight-png · 2 months

Note

I have hope in the Jewish people as a whole, I know Jewish people will always continue, survive and then thrive. I feel less hopeful in myself personally because I'm walking around like a robot because thinking and feeling seems far too dangerous. And I feel hopeless about non Jewish people ever just leaving us be, leaving us alone. I don't think they will ever just leave us alone. I don't like this destiny that Jews will always have to grow flowers from the ground non Jews uprooted us from or stomped on. All I want is for us to be left alone, that's the only request or want I have from non Jewish people.

I understand. We can have hope for survival, and yet worry about that survival being easy or simple.

I had a similar conversation with my mother a while back during a period of absolutely horrible emotional burnout. Yes, we survived the pogroms and the Holocaust and the expulsions and everything before, after, and between that. We as a people survived. And yet, how many more of us should there be right now? How many more branches could all of our family trees have? We as a people survived, sure, but so many of us as individuals didn't.

You said you wanted us to be left alone, and that you don't see that kind of future for us. And yet, we as Jews have built our belief around a hope of a better future. We hope and wait for that future, whether it be tomorrow or in a hundred years.

We as a people are a hopeful nation.

Recently I was being driven to the doctor by one of the teachers at my university's Chabad and she turned on some Jewish music, and one of the songs was about waiting for moshiach.

It was, as you can guess, a hopeful song. An optimistic song about the certainty of a bright and good future coming soon.

And then she told me that this song was commonly sung during the Holocaust.

This song was sung by the Jews in the camps as they waited in line for the gas chambers and ovens.

At the darkest of times they still believed in a good future, if not for them then for us, or for those after us.

We right now are afraid. We are hurting. We are anxious. But if at our darkest times before we found hope, I have faith that there is still hope to be found now.

Our flowers have grown atop trampled earth before, and someday our garden will thrive without threat. For now, all we have are the seeds.

So let's plant those seeds atop trampled earth once more, and water them with hope.

#jumblr #jewish #judaism #jew #proud israeli #israel solidarity #antisemitism #jewish joy #jewish hope

144 notes · View notes

mika-no-sekai-blog · 5 months

Text

The past and the future

Azriel's week: Day 6

Hosted by: @azrielappreciationweek

Word count: 800+

Azriel's lips were warm and soft as he hungrily explored your mouth. This kiss was nothing like the first gentle one. It wasn't uncertain nor cautious. This one was deep, burning, fuelled by long suppressed lust.

Gradually his previous words reached your brain and settled there. 'Finally' he said. You broke the kiss and gasping for air you gave him a confused look. "What do you mean 'finally'?" you asked looking into his shiny hazel eyes.

He seemed different than before. He beamed, looking much more alive than ever before. You felt something electric, pulsating from him, something that pulled you to him like a magnet.

"I've been waiting for this moment for years. The bond snapped the moment I first time met you. All those years I was praying to Mother you could feel it too," his deep voice was full of pain, eyes full of love begged you to understand. "I already lost hope thinking that it is punishment for everything I've done in my life. That it will never snap for you."

Suddenly needing a space you pushed away from him. "You knew it for years." It wasn't question, you were only making sure you heard him correctly. "Have you ever consider telling me about it?"

Azriel huffed shaking his head. "At least million times. But every time when I saw fear in your eyes as I stepped closer to you, I ran away. I didn't want to completely scare you away."

He had a good point in this. It was all because of the stories you heard about him. When you eventually met him, you feared him even more. But it lasted just for a year or two. Then you understood that in real he wasn't so bad and fear disappeared leaving only feeling of discomfort in his proximity.

Azriel waited for you to think things over, his jaw tight, pleading eyes full of hope. But when you didn't say anything even after ten minutes, he got nervous. "Please, say something. Be angry, yell at me, anything, just don't be this silent."

"I'm not sure what should I say," you admitted. Your feelings were mixing together until you didn't know how you felt anymore. Only emotion you were sure of was what you felt for him. "I must have been hard for you."

"You can't imagine how hard. I swear if I knew that all it needs is only one kiss, I would do it long time ago. Even if you would hate me for that." Azriel looked down on his hands trying to hide them in the sleeves.

Usually he pretended he didn't mind his damaged skin, however you noticed him doing it quite often. Maybe it was just some kind of habit he didn't realise he was doing, but your heart hurt at sight of it.

You reached out and took both of his big hands into your small ones and with thumbs caressed back of them. He watched it holding his breath.

"Who could do something so cruel to you?" you whispered to yourself, but he heard you.

"My stepbrothers," he answered, his voice empty of any emotion. Your head snapped up, eyes went wide and lips parted.

'Why' was the only word you could muster. Azriel shrugged.

"I was just bastard that their father begot. I guess it was fun for them."

Your brows furrowed. "I'm sorry," you whispered watching him closely. However his face didn't reveal any emotion, it was blank as a sheet of paper. It made you worry even more and you cupped his cheek. Azriel finally looked up at you, thinking about something. Then his lips curled into sad smile.

"This isn't how I imagined this moment," he mumbled. You gave him small smile.

"You did, huh. So how did you imagine it?"

He teased his lower lip with teeth, intensively watching you while putting the words together in his mind. "I thought it would be romantic. Like.. we would be infinitely happy, laugh, kiss a lot, snuggle. I would tell you how much I love you and you would tell me you love me more." His cheeks blushed lightly and his smile changed into teasing one.

You giggled. It was really sweet imagination. "It sounds great. Maybe we should start all over again."

"Maybe," his eyes shined brighter. "But it would only delay everything that will come after that."

That got your attention. "And what exactly is coming after this?" you asked curious.

His smile widen as if that was the question he wanted you ask. "We will go to another five, maybe six dates just to get to know each other better before you accept the bond and I ask you to move in together. After living together for a year I will propose to you, we will get married and then we will work hard on a little babe."

You laughed so hard that you burst into tears because obviously he was teasing you and Azriel laughed together with you. "But jokes aside," he said when both of you calmed down and finally caught your breaths. "I'd really love it to be like that. Of course only if you would like it too."

You leaned closer to him looking into those beautiful and warm hazel eyes. "I'd love it too. It sounds like good plan for the start."

Azriel smiled showing those lovely dimples and closed the distance between you. This kiss was sweet and full of love and promises of nice future.

#azrielappreciationweek2023 #az x reader #azriel x reader #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #azriel spymaster #azriel x you #azriel #azriel fanfic #acotar fanfiction #acotar

116 notes · View notes