#i guess it feels a bit like mania. i've only been manic twice and both times were caused by medication. this...isn't.

[olibavee]

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i don’t know what happened, i just decided to play skyrim on a whim a week ago and for some reason my brain decided to develop a disease in the span of 3 hours and now it’s all i’ve been able to think about even though i’ve been playing this game since 2012 but was p casual about it until now. this might sound silly but i was actually scared when i woke up the next day because it happened so suddenly and i’m really not sure what caused it. 

#liv asdf #i'm p sure it's because i've been REALLY off mentally lately so i think my brain's grasping at straws for smth to lose itself in #which comes with its own problems but it has been helping me take care of myself more lately since i have more energy #i guess it feels a bit like mania. i've only been manic twice and both times were caused by medication. this...isn't. #i seriously have no idea what triggered it and it's unnerving because it's such a complete 180 from how i was feeling earlier. #and i'm really really not used to it #idk man. it's nice to feel like this but it's very jarring and i'm worried i'll 'crash' at some point. #that and i'm hugely paranoid about being annoying and talking too much about one thing. aaagh #at least i have therapy tomorrow.........