#i had the sudden urge to gif his best line in film

[neuvistar]

no bc imagine gamer blade with virgin/inexperienced reader 🥹🥹 (im in my gamer blade brainrot rn omg)

INEXPERIENCED.

— featuring ┊gamer ! blade x fem!reader

— warnings / content warnings ┊all consensual btw! not proofread cuz i’m a lazy bum, virgin!reader obvi.. blade referred 2 as “yingxing” bladie being all gentle with u but then it goes wrong (he loses 2 his demons), mating press, overall suggestive content. 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

— a/n ┊oooo ngl i lowkey feel like he would also be a virgin, like it’s his first time too but he knows more than u do, ykwim? (this has been rotting in my drafts for awhile here u go!!)

honestly.. it’s not like you were experienced in this sort of thing.. and it’s not like you were thinking about doing this kind of thing when you’re ready, you had knowledge about it but you weren’t told that it was gonna probably gonna hurt for the first time?!

here you were, hands gripping at the sheets from beneath your sweating frame.. trying your absolute best not to squeeze and clench around blade’s cock that was carefully buried deep inside your drenched cunt, it’s not like you weren’t enjoying it.. you loved it. you absolutely love the fact that it fits just right, filling you up only a few inches deep! he was not even barely in and you were already moaning out his name, nuzzling your nose against the flesh of his neck to hide the blush that crossed your face. it was embarrassing really, atleast that’s what you thought. you were inexperienced and blade knew that, he said he was as well but you didn’t quite understand just why and how he’s so good with using his dick, you didn’t know if he did this sort of thing before and he was lying or he watched played or watched some.. pornographic film, you didn’t even know! you were so deep in thought that you almost didn’t even feel the pain of him fully sliding himself into you so easily, forcing a choked moan from your throat.

out of reflex almost, your pussy pulsed around his cock.. the walls of your insides pulling him in even closer as blade threw his head back at the sudden movement, fighting the urge to thrust into you completely and break you tonight, but that’s not happening.. no.. not tonight at least. blade wanted to take it slow with you, be sweet.. but the way you were clenching around him made it more difficult to control those urges. “e—easy sweetheart, eaasy.. yeah that’s it..” his voice sent a line of electricity through your body, making you jolt. aeons, he really knew how to use his cock.. he knew how to use it pretty well and he knew how to show you just how good he can use it.

“yingxing.. y—yingxing ‘s too much already.. dunno if i can take it..” you whined to him, clutching tight on the cotton black shirt he always wore until your knuckles turned white, squeezing your eyes shut when you finally feel his cock sliding in and out of you, his thrusts were slow and sweet.. passionate and full of love. but yet, it was your first time and you had such a tough time trying to accommodate his length.. it’s like you could feel tears forming from the ends of your eyes already from how good it felt, yet it hurt like a bitch. you didn’t know if your tears were from the pleasure or pain, but it’s safe to say it was from both.

“you can take it, big girl. i know you can. c’mon, keep going.. you got this.” he praised, well that was a surprise. blade had his hands on your knees to help your legs spread out more, letting the cold air brush against your soaked pussy as you whined again, he bit down on your shoulder to try and restrain himself from ruining you for the night. sweat trailed down all over your body from how hot it was, blade could almost feel like his body was melting and burning from the heat of the moment, running his fingers through his hair as he looked down at you with a dangerous stare. that sight.. that sight of you beneath him.. how sweat dripped down all over your body, how your breasts were slightly bouncing from the impact of his gentle thrusts, how sweet you sounded every time you whispered “yingxing..” under your breath, how you had your hand on your mouth to prevent you from making any more noises.. oh how he stretched your poor pussy out from his cock alone, how lewd the sounds of squelching were.. it drove him crazy.

well, you weren’t wrong when you thought about how good he was with his cock! and there, blade lost control as his slow passionate thrusts became more quickened and desperate ones, his grunts growing louder the more he slammed himself into you, tightening his grip around your knees. “yingxing..?—“ “sorry.. i need this.. i need this now, angel. i’m sorry— ah..” was all he mumbled before his dick practically hit every spot inside your walls, you could’ve sworn you could feel your eyes gouging out of your eye sockets as his pace quickened further, grabbing ahold of your knees and forcefully pinning them against your chest, keeping them in place as he proceeded to dick you down, the sound of creaking from the bed increasing as well as your moans and the noise of skin slapping against each other, fuck.. he was getting more and more desperate the more he fucked his dick into you, egging you on to take more of his length and girth.

“fuck fuck fuck.. yingxing please!” your voice was muffled against him, wrapping your arms around his neck as blade bullied his cock deeper and deeper into your cunt, his tongue flicking against the skin of your neck as his fingers gently squeezed your breast. “mm.. does that feel good?" blade asked softly, his tone now filled with lust. “yeah.. more? you want more? i’ll fucking give you more..”

blade was completely out of it now.. squeezing you in a mating press as he pushed your knees further down your chest, the new position allowed his dick to access your deepest areas.. the pain soon disappearing as it was replaced with pure pleasure and euphoria, the euphoric feeling deep within your veins.. that euphoric feeling of how good he was fucking ypu to oblivion. “don’t squeeze around me like that.. you’re gonna make me cum, [name].. i can’t—“ blade bit his lip as he grabbed your knees, pinning them even further as he pounded inside your aching pussy, the position could make him come alone from how flexible you were.. damn. “yingxing!” the way you said his name, the way his named rolled so gently off your tongue, your teary eyed expression.. he wanted to see even more of it.

honestly.. you were inexperienced but you don’t think that.. you were inexperienced enough to take his cock. you knew damn well that night.. you took him like it was nothing.

perhaps.. maybe you can do it again more often?

#ᖭི༏ᖫྀ maryse’s diary ૮꒰˶˃̵ ^ ˂̵˵꒱ა #blade <33 #honkai star rail smut #blade pussy destroyer #hsr smut #blade smut #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail blade #blade x reader #blade x you #hsr blade #hsr x you #hsr x reader

[burning-fcols]

Vox is clearly obsessed. Has been obsessed with Angel ever since their accidental night together. Why do people think he's put extra cameras in the spider's dressing room? He hasn't taken his eyes off the screens feeding the display back to him as Angel gets himself ready. Fuck it. Valentino could hold out a little bit longer, if anything he'll come up with an excuse for it. Angel's room even has a communicator, hidden well from a certain moth. Just for contact between them. His voice crackles to life over it, strained with need.  "Angel? Can I borrow some of your time? You won't get caught, trust me~ " ( :'3 ) - ✧ ˖ ˙ 「 @Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴᴀʙʟᴇᴍᴜꜱᴇꜱ 」 ˙ ˖ ✧

「 ☆ 」 Drawing the attention of intense individuals is a-given for Angel, fate seeming to have a personal vendetta against him. Even before Hell, he often felt the gaze of creeps watching his movements. Subtle in their lechery, for fear of drawing harm upon themselves. No concern given to the mafioso's well-being should he be blamed for earning such thoughts, even when he wasn't TRYING to. In Hell? Subtlety is unneeded and restraint even less-so. Something Angel had learned quickly.

Despite his luck, Angel had still HOPED— however stupidly —Vox wouldn't fall into the same pitfalls after experiencing what he has to offer. That pride might be enough to keep those urges shoved down where they can't risk tainting his carefully-cultivated persona. Or the tenuous position of power Vox put himself in; especially when walking the delicate line that is being on Valentino's good side. But all it took was one night, one accidental fucking night, and Angel could already feel the shift in the air. Everyone else oblivious to the change, as they SHOULD be.

But Angel vividly aware of the way cameras seemed to... shift whenever he passed them. Trailing him wherever he went, focused on every action, every scene both on and off-stage... Existing in the studio becoming just as much a performance as when he's being filmed, Angel shedding his habit of letting himself SOMEWHAT breathe when not under Valentino's watchful eye. Sure, he had always knew Vox could see him— witnessed those moments of humanity, even when he would breakdown in his dressing room —but it never felt like it mattered until now.

It never felt like Vox was genuinely paying attention.

Keeping his composure— sparingly giving glances to the cameras before he caught himself —Angel has to admit he may have been working with the change in dynamic. If only because there's hardly a CHOICE. Better to grab what semblance of control he could, act as if he's a part of the game rather than an unwilling pawn. Noting the additional cameras in his dressing room ( one doesn't spend as much time in the room as HE has without intimately knowing the old from new ) he may have been subtilely showing-off. Acting as if in the midst of work, body positioned to allow Vox the best angles. Every curve, every slow teasing slip of his new outfit onto his form— Val having picked out something special for him to wear —the way Angel's glossy lips slightly part as he applies his eyeshadow in the mirror.

Although, this is nothing compared to what happened a few days prior. When Angel looked RIGHT at Vox a camera while being taken by Valentino in his dressing room, sultry gaze secretly letting Vox know he was aware the other was watching... Frankly, Angel commends the Overlord for holding out this long.

Startling at the sudden disruption, Angel sets down his makeup brush to disguise the slight tremor in his hands. Sucking in a discreet breath, he silently exhales... before looking up at a camera he knows is looming overhead. Showtime. Repressed need is unmistakable in Vox's tone, the others strained state oddly comforting. He's already on-edge. So long as Angel keeps his unease under control, he should keep the upper-hand despite being the powerless one in the room. With a sly smile, he responds to Vox's question... knowing it's an order.

❝ I was wonderin' when you'd make anotha' move... You got more self-restraint than most people do, Mista' Vox.~ ❞ He teases, name somehow sounding like a sin when passing his lips. He plays up his brattiness with a flip of his bangs and a lowering of his hot-pink lids, ❝ Sure hope you don' show any once I'm there. ❞ Mentally-preparing himself for a no-doubt pent-up Vox, he makes his way to the doors of his dressing room, hips purposely swaying with each step. Sparing a glance over his shoulder, he purrs through a smirk, ❝ I'll see ya soon, Daddy~ ❞

❛ Trust me. ❜ Angel doesn't trust Vox as far as he can throw him, but he fervently PRAYS to be proven wrong. If he's not... then Angel is fucked in more ways than one. 「 ☆ 」

#hari don't look #burning-fcols #⭒ ˙ ˖ ✧ — ˗ˏˋ ❝ ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀɴᴛʀᴀ; ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴍʏ ʟɪꜰᴇ ❞ ¦ 「 Angel Dust IC 」 #⭒ ˙ ˖ ✧ — ˗ˏˋ ❝ ʟᴇᴛ ᴍᴇ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ᴍʏ ꜱᴏᴜʟ ᴛᴏ ʙᴜʀɴ; ᴀɴᴅ ɪ'ʟʟ ʙᴇ ʙʀᴇᴀᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪᴛ ɪɴ ❞ ◌ ᴍᴀɪɴ ¦ 「 Angel Dust 」 #questionablemuses #⭒ ˙ ˖ ✧ — ˗ˏˋ ❝ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ɢᴀᴢᴇ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀᴢᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴄʀᴀᴄᴋꜱ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴄʀᴇᴇɴ ❞ ¦ 「 Vox 」 #♡ ˙ ˖ ✧ — ˗ˏˋ ❝ ᴀ ʀᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ; ᴀ ʀᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇᴄᴇɪᴠᴇ ❞ ¦ 「 Angel Dust and Vox 」 #⭒ ˙ ˖ ✧ — ˗ˏˋ ❝ ꜱᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ɪꜰ ɪ ᴍɪꜱʙᴇʜᴀᴠᴇ? ɪᴛ’ꜱ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏʙᴏᴅʏ ᴄʀᴀᴠᴇꜱ ❞ ¦ 「 Answer 」 #⭒ ˙ ˖ ✧ — ˗ˏˋ ❝ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ꜱᴏᴍᴇʙᴏᴅʏ ɢᴏɴᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴀɪᴛ ᴛᴏᴏ ʟᴏɴɢ— ❞ ¦ 「 Queue 」

[itsallyscorner]

Baby’s First Heartbreak

pairing: marvel cast x teen!fem!reader, Scarlett Johansson x reader, Elizabeth Olsen x reader

prompt: the youngest member of the marvel cast experiences her first breakup.

warnings: not much—crying, a break up.

A/n: Tom is 19 here because this is set during Civil War. He was such a baby omg🥺

You were always a firm believer in having hope. No matter what the situation was, you knew that you had to at least try before fully giving up. You were only 18, but it was the mindset you grew up with. You were taught to face things with bravery and confidence, you faced things head to head with all your might. Though some things never went the way you planned, you were still the ray of sunshine you were, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, eager to learn and explore the world.

You had the same mindset going into your first relationship. Love was something you’ve always wanted to experience. Sure, you received it from your friends and family. But you wanted the different kind of love. The special one that was shared between two people. The one that made your heart skip a beat and made you breathless. Where staring into that special someone’s eyes felt like you were being transported into another world where it was just the two of you.

You’ve found that kind of love in a boy from your hometown. The two of you had been friends since pre-k, growing up along side each other, and being there for each other’s success and failures. You’ve known him all your life but the feelings didn’t come till sophomore year of high school. It all just clicked all of sudden; that one day where he said you looked cute in his jumper and the next moment you knew you were seeing him in a new light. Junior year, you were both beating around the bush; constantly pining over each other with longing stares and fingers always brushing against each other. Though you didn’t see him all the time due to your job as an actress. You spent half of the school year in your hometown and the rest at Atlanta. Of course he knew of your job and as much as he hated to see you go, he knew you were doing something that made you happy. So he spent as much time as he could with you before your time together came to an end. A few days prior to your flight to Atlanta, under the night sky of your backyard, he admitted his feelings for you. By senior year, the two of you had been dating for half a year. It had been the best moments of your life, you were in love and high on happiness, it was like nothing in life could ever go wrong.

Now here you were, in your trailer on the set of Captain America: Civil War, sobbing you eyes out. You knew loving could hurt, but not this much. You still felt your heart skip a beat, but it was clenching in heartache. You were still breathless, but because you’ve been trying to catch your breath after every sob that wracked your body. You felt broken. The boy you loved had ripped your heart out of your chest and threw it onto the floor, stomping on it till it stopped beating.

You hiccuped as you stared at yourself in the mirror. You were nothing but a fool. A fool who had hope in something that was never going to work. You sniffled as you snatched tissues out of the box on your bathroom sink, dabbing the material onto your eyes and blowing your nose. Your eyes were red and your cheeks were puffy. A sigh of frustration releases from your body. There was no way you could walk onto set without people asking you what was wrong.

You debated asking your assistant to ask your designated makeup artist to do your makeup in your trailer, you didn’t want to be a bother. But your thumbs were already shamefully typing away the request on your phone. A few minutes later Eleanor, your makeup artist on set, arrives at your trailer with her supplies in hand.

She doesn’t directly question you, but she has the look of a concerned mother once she sees your face. You lie to her and tell her you weren’t having a good day and chalked it up to being homesick.

You dreaded going on set. You weren’t sure if you could face anyone without bursting into tears. The moment you felt like you were okay, your heart would clench, reminding you of the ache it was feeling.

You were in your costume, sitting on the sidelines of the set while you rehearsed your lines. The dialogue from the script acted as a distraction from the current pain you were feeling. The tears had stopped but your eyes felt dry, making you blink multiple times to keep them wet.

“Hey, sweetheart.” You look up and meet the stunning blue eyes of Chris Evans. That typical goofy smile of his was etched onto his features. Usually you would reciprocate that smile, but today you just couldn’t find it in your heart to do so. His smile falters when he sees your face.

“Morning.” You greet him, forcing a smile. Concern shadows on his face as he shifts a bit closer to you. “You alright?” He asks, eyes softening at you. Being the youngest of all the Avengers cast members, everyone had a soft side for you. Especially Chris, who saw you as a daughter.

“Y-yeah, I’ve just got—allergies.” You lied, another fake smile forcing itself onto your lips.

“Well have you taken something to help your allergies? Do you need Allegra? Claritin or something?” He looked around ready to call one of the runners on set to get you some meds.

“No! I took some already, a few minutes ago! It probably hasn’t kicked in yet.” You tell him. He eyes you reluctantly, not knowing if he should believe you. He decides to let it pass and nods, “Ok, tell me if you need anything though.”

You hum in response and tilt your head down back to your script.

The day goes on and everyone had caught on to your lack of—being you. The infamous smile everyone knew you by was barely on your face. You didn’t crack jokes with Anthony or share a giggle with Elizabeth. Instead you were quiet, a frown was on your face as you stared blankly at the floor. You didn’t interact with anybody, keeping to yourself and walking off set whenever one of the Russos called cut.

Anthony and Sebastian watched as you walked off the set. You have all finished a sequence of the airport scene and the Russos had given everyone a break while they rewatched the scenes they shot. Anthony’s brows furrowed while he watched your figure go further and further away. He had tried to cheer you up, telling you a joke about how Seb’s arm lube kept leaking out his fake arm. Your response was nothing but a fake laugh—it wasn’t even a fake laugh, more like a huff of laughter.

“She didn’t laugh at my joke.” Anthony thought aloud. Sebastian quirked an eye at his friend, “Does she have to laugh at all your jokes?”

“No, but even if I tell her a corny ass joke, she’ll still laugh at it.” He expressed, throwing his arms up. Sebastian’s lip pouted as he thought back to your behavior on set. You were acting unusual. He turns to Tom (Holland) and asks, “Hey, has (y/n) said anything to you? Like anything bothering her?”

The Brit shakes his head, “Um, nope. Besides filming, I haven’t spoken to her today.”

Anthony crosses his arms, approaching Tom, “Have you tried speaking to her? We’ve been trying to figure out what’s been going on with her today and you’re the closest to her age here.”

“I—I tried to talk to her, but she didn’t seem in a talking mood. I thought I was bothering her so I just stopped.” Tom answered. He gestures to the direction of the trailers, “I could check up on her right now? Maybe I’ll get her one of her favorite snacks from crafties, it might cheer her up.”

Half of a smile makes it way onto Sebastian’s face at the boy’s efforts. Though you were clearly upset and he felt like they were all prodding at your privacy. “Maybe we should give her some time alone.”

Tom frowns at the older man, “But (y/n)’s upset. Shouldn’t we do something?” Anthony agrees with Tom and looks at Sebastian.

Seb raises his hands up in defense, “I’m just saying—maybe she wants to be alone. She went back to her trailer away from everybody. She probably doesn’t want us shoving our noses into her business, we should respect that.”

Chris joins the group along with Scarlett and Elizabeth. He had overhead the group talking and urged the two ladies to join him in on the conversation.

“You guys talking about (y/n)?” Chris asks, hands on his waist.

“Yeah, Seb says we should leave her be.” Anthony fills him in.

“She told me she had allergies.” Chris starts. “She’s an amazing actress, but kid’s gotta work on the lying.” He finishes. Elizabeth and Scarlett glance at each other.

“Well has anyone talked to her at all today? Besides Chris?” Elizabeth asked the group. Everyone shakes their head. Elizabeth sighs while looking around at anyone else who could’ve talked to you. She spots Eleanor hanging along the sides with her makeup belt on, ready for touch ups. Elizabeth calls her over. Eleanor has her brush ready to powder her down, but Elizabeth politely declines.

“You do (y/n)‘s makeup right?”

Eleanor nods, “Yeah, I do.”

“How was she this morning? We’re just a bit concerned since she’s been acting different today.” Eleanor sighs, knowing if she told them it would be an invasion of your privacy. Although, they were all concerned for you and so was she.

“I got a text from her assistant telling me to do her makeup in her trailer today.” She began. “I walked in and her eyes were red, cheeks puffy—“

Chris apologizes and interrupts her, “Because of allergies?”

Eleanor shakes her head, “No, she never mentioned anything about allergies. But she looked like she’s been crying. She was wiping her face when I arrived.”

“Did she give you a reason for why she was crying?” Scarlett questions her.

“She told me she was feeling homesick.” Eleanor answered. Scarlett turned to Chris and shared a look. Elizabeth thanks Eleanor then turns back to the group.

“We need to check up on her.” Anthony says. All the men nodded and began to make their way to your trailer. Suddenly, they were stopped by Scarlett and Elizabeth.

“But (y/n)—“ Tom said pointing to the trailers. Scarlett shakes her head, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Lizzie and I will go. You guys are gonna overwhelm her with all your questions.” Scarlett insists, much to the men’s dismay. They wanted to be there for you, but maybe a mother figure might help you open up with what’s bothering you. They agree and let the two women go to your trailer. Before they can get to you, they get some snacks from crafties for you.

As soon as you shut the trailer’s door behind you, the tears welled up in your eyes again. It only took a matter of seconds until they fell from your eyes and down your cheeks. You heard some people walk by outside and cover your mouth to muffle the whimpers that came out your mouth. You slid down the door and shoved your head into your hands. You leaned forward against your knees as you cried into your arms. You felt pathetic, embarrassed, anger; you were feeling so many things and the only way to let them all out seemed to be crying.

They heard your cries from behind the door. Scarlett sends Elizabeth an alarmed look as she rushes up to your door. She knocked on it repeatedly, causing you to jump from behind the door. Your cries come to a stop while you try to wipe away the tears as best as you can.

“(Y/n), honey, please open the door.” You hear Scarlett say. You remain silent, getting up and dusting your legs off. You stare at the door, debating whether you should open it or not.

“(Y/n), everyone’s worried about you. We just want to help.” Another voice coaxes you behind the door. Elizabeth. “Please let us in.”

Outside, the two women had their ears pressed up against your trailer’s door. Scarlett tries to get you to open the door again, “It’s only me and Lizzie. I promise.”

There was some shuffling heard behind the door. The door pushes open slowly, making Scarlett and Elizabeth back away. A worried expression appears on Scarlett’s face once she sees you. She cups your cheeks, her thumbs gently swiping away some tears that fell from your eyes. The two of them shuffle inside your trailer. You burst out into tears once again when Scarlett wraps her arms around you. She moves you both to sit on the couch that was in your trailer. She lets you shove your head into the crook of her neck while her hands smoothed your hair. Elizabeth sits behind you rubbing circles onto your back. Your cries broke both their hearts. You were a fairly happy girl, to see you in such pain and heartache was hard to watch.

Scarlett rocks you back and forth, trying to calm you down by whispering comforting words into your ear. She presses a motherly kiss onto your forehead once she sees you start to calm down. Elizabeth waits patiently beside you waiting for when you’re ready to talk. When your whimpers turned into hiccups, Scarlett pulls your face away from her neck to look at you. She frowns when she sees your tear stained cheeks.

“Are you going to tell us what’s going on or are you going to keep bottling it up to yourself?” She asks you softly, tucking strands of your hair behind your ears. Elizabeth chimes in from behind you, “You know, sometimes it helps to tell others what’s bothering you. You don’t have to keep it to yourself, (y/n), you could talk to us.” She gathers your hair together, splitting it into two parts as she began to fish tail braid your hair. 

You take a moment to compose yourself before eyeying the two women. You knew you could trust them. Scarlett was like your on-set mom and Lizzie was like one of your aunts. If you could tell anyone on set what was going on, it would be them.

“He broke up with me.” You confess, eyes trained on your lap. Lizzie’s fingers stop braiding your hair, “What?”

“Peyton, he broke up with me.” You whined, not wanting to say it again. You fiddle with your fingers while a tear falls to your lap.

“Oh honey.” Scarlett cooes pulling you back into her chest. You sniffle and wrap your arms around her torso. Silently crying into her shoulder.

“Did he give you a reason why?” Lizzie asks softly. You move away from Scarlett’s hold and lean against the couch with your knees to your chest. Lizzie wraps an arm around your shoulder for comfort.

You glanced at your phone that was on the coffee table, “H-he texted me earlier this morning. He said he couldn’t do the long distance thing anymore and that he has feelings for somebody else.”

Anger flashes in Scarlett’s eyes, “He broke up with you over a text message?” You nod in response.

“What a dick.” She mutters glaring at your phone. It’s quiet for a few minutes. Until you ask them, “Am I not worth trying for a long distance relationship?”

Lizzie shakes her head, “No, don’t you ever think that because you are.”

You sigh and throw your head back, “Then why did he break up with me? Is there something wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough?” Scarlett interrupts your questions by shushing you.

“There is not a damn thing wrong about you. Don’t you ever let a man, let alone a boy, make you question your worth.” Scarlett advises you a stern look on her face. “You are the most sweetest and loveliest girl I have ever met in my life. You’re kind, you care about the people around you—you even laugh at Anthony’s stupid jokes.”

Lizzie snorts beside you and squeezes your shoulder, “And his jokes are the worst.”

Scarlett continues, “You are a talented young woman already making it big in the movie industry and you did it all on your own. You are beautiful inside and out. You’re perfect, there’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Then why did he leave me?”

“Because he’s an idiot that doesn’t know your worth.” Lizzie answers resting her head on your shoulder. “I know it hurts now but these things happen for a reason. He wasn’t meant for you and you weren’t meant for him. Maybe somewhere in the future you guys will meet and try again. Or maybe you’ll move on with someone new. That’s just how it is. It may sound harsh, but it’s the truth.”

Scarlett nods at Lizzie, “Take it from me, I’ve been married twice. When it seems like you found that special person, sometimes it’ll all come crashing down. And it’s not an easy thing to go through. It’s full of pain, heartache, self doubt and a bunch of other heart wrenching things. But in the end you come out a stronger version of yourself.”

You stare at Scarlett, “How did you do it?”

Scarlett softly smiles at you, “Well, I had lots of friends who supported me every step of the way. But most importantly, I valued myself. I did things that made me happy and took care of myself mentally and physically.”

You bite your lip in thought as you stare at the ground.

“Listen to me.” Scarlett urges you, “You’re young, (y/n). You’re going to meet so many more people in the future that’ll bring you so much happiness and love in your life. Don’t beat yourself up over one boy who decided to leave you because he wasn’t committed for a long distance relationship. You’re going to be okay.” She assures you, cradling your face. Your lips form into a tight smile while you nod in response.

“You have us and the rest of the people outside of this trailer to support you. We’ll always have your back, whatever it is, I promise you that. You’re not going to go through this by yourself.” Lizzie promises you, taking your hand into hers. You hum and rest your head on her shoulder. You pull on Scarlett’s arm to join you and Lizzie. She chuckles and hugs you from behind.

“Thank you guys.” You whisper, genuinely grateful that you had them in your life. Lizzie pecks your temple, “Anytime darling.”

#marvel #marvel cast x reader #marvel cast x teen!reader #mcu #avengers #chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans imagines #Scarlett Johansson #Scarlett Johansson x reader #elizabeth olsen x reader #avengers x reader #avengers x teen!reader #Tom Holland #Sebastian Stan #anthony mackie #tom holland x reader #sebastian stan x reader #anthony mackie x reader

[sub-hoshi-enthusiast]

Ya'll, I swear this was just supposed to be a fun little story I had in mind but it ended up being 4,379 words so-

It's literally 12:00 am here and I just had the sudden urge to finish this so enjoy I guess.

Pairing: non-idol!roommate!Kino x reader

⚠️Warnings⚠️: sub!Kino, fem!dom!reader, camboy!Kino (kind of??), masturbastion, bondage, use of toys (vibrator, dildo), pegging, cum eating, degradation, crossdressing (?? he wears panties)

Secrets

"Honey, I'm home." You playfully called out as you opened the door to the apartment you shared with your best friend Hyunggu. When you didn't get a response you shrugged, figuring he was still at the dance studio making another choreography to post to his YouTube channel. You quickly put away all the groceries, quietly humming a song you couldn't quite remember the name of. You poked your head into his bedroom, just checking to see if he was there and stepping out; well, that was the plan anyways. As your eyes scanned the room you could see his laptop and camera laying on his bed, his laptop still running and, on closer inspection, unlocked. You thought for a second before sitting on the mattress, opening up his laptop and moving to his files to see what he had been filming. 

     You were expecting to find a new choreography video, hence why you went to look at it. You always loved the choreographies he made up, the way his body would move so skillfully to the beat of whatever music was playing. Surprise was definitely an understatement when his sweet moans spilled from the speakers as soon as you clicked on the video. Your face exploded red as you quickly paused the video trying to understand what was happening. 

     You tentatively started the video again, gulping as you watched your roommate playing with himself. His moans were absolutely sinful as his hands wandered all over his body, loud whimpers falling from his lips when he ran them over his nipples. He reached over to grab some lube, squirting it on his fingers before spreading his legs and circling them over his hole. Your breath hitched in your throat as he slowly pushed them in, his gasps and whimpers being music to your ears. You bit your bottom lip as he began thrusting his fingers inside of him, slowly speeding up as the minutes passed and making his sounds louder. The squelching sound from the lube was heard through the camera as he frantically fingered himself, his other hand reaching behind him to grasp the pillow beneath him when he curled his fingers. His jaw fell open and his eyes were glassy while his back arched off the bed, his head falling to the side. You were squirming in your spot, thighs clenching together as your hand itched to travel between your legs. 

     He slowly pulled his fingers out of himself just as he looked like he was about to cum, precum dribbling out of his tip and making a small pool on his stomach. You furrowed your eyebrows as he reached over to grab a box that was all too familiar to you. He opened it, cock twitching as he bit his lip with a moan. Your jaw dropped in shock as he pulled out a few of the toys - or to be more specific, your toys. The box he was holding was your box of 'toys' that you had kept in your closet. You could see the excitement rushing through his veins as he dug around for a minute to find what he wanted. When he was done, he had taken out your vibrator and your dildo that you usually used for your strap on.

     He set the silicone cock to the side, holding the vibrator in his hand. He turned it on to its lowest setting, slightly shivering at the sound of it turning on. He only hesitated for a second before pressing the toy to the tip of his cock. He gasped loudly, followed by a series of moans and whimpers as he thrashed on the bed. Just as he was about to cum, he pulled it away from himself, making you groan as you realized he was purposefully edging himself. He thought for a second before turning off the toy, coating it in a thin layer of precum that had collected on his stomach before pushing it into his hole. His head rolled back as he bit his lip, holding back a groan. He adjusted to the feeling of it for a second before reaching down to turn it on. His jaw dropped open in a loud moan as soon as the toy buzzed to life inside of him, hands desperately gripping the sheets beneath him. One of his hands moved up to his head, raking his fingers through his hair before tugging on it harshly. A mantra of 'oh my god' fell from his lips as he arched his back off the mattress, thighs shaking as the pleasure coursed through his body. 

      You couldn't help but imagine that it was you giving him that pleasure, hovering over him as you thrusted the vibrator in and out of him while tugging at his hair, leaving countless hickeys across his clear skin to remind him who he belongs to. You let out a quiet moan as your hand disappeared between your thighs, softly rubbing over your sensitive clit. You hadn't realized how soaked your panties were until now. Hyunggu's hips bucked as he set the vibrations a little higher, making a high-pitched moan leave him as his cries got louder. He seemed to get lost in the pleasure as he closed his eyes, his whole body shaking as he finally released all over his stomach. He frantically reached down, turning off the toy and pulling it out of him. He whined as he looked down at the mess he made. 

     "I wasn't supposed to cum this early…" He muttered with a pout as he laid his head back down. He thought for a second before swiftly sitting up to grab your dildo, lubing it up before lining it up with his hole so he could ride it. His jaw dropped open while he furrowed his eyebrows and squeezed his eyes shut, a shaky moan leaving him as he sunk onto the toy. His cock started to twitch back to life again and you could tell from his reaction that he was still sensitive from his previous orgasm. He whimpered as he slowly lifted himself almost all the way off the toy before slamming himself back down. He bit his lip with a groan while his eyes rolled back in his head from the overwhelming pleasure he was feeling. 

     "Oh fuck, mommy!" He cried out with his head thrown back as he bounced on the toy. Arousal shot through you as he continuously called out the title, face and chest flushing red as he got closer and closer to his release. "Oh god, Oh fuck- mommy! Fuck mommy, I'm gonna cum!" His tongue hung out of his mouth, adding to the drool that was already covering his chin. You sped up the movement of your fingers, feeling your own release creeping closer and closer. His moans became more frequent and high-pitched as the seconds passed. "C-cumming! C- AH!" He cried out, eyes crossing as the pleasure swallowed him whole, his milky white seed spilling onto the sheets beneath him. He slowly rode out his high before looking at the small mess he made, bending down to lick it up. That was all it took for your orgasm to wash over you as he muttered a quiet 'Always clean up my messes for mommy' before the screen went black. You sat there for a second, catching your breath before you realized that you had just cum in your best friend's bed. 

     You hurriedly exited the file and closed the laptop, jumping off of the bed and moving to change the sheets. After you had finished, you closed his door and leaned against it with a loud sigh. Your head snapped to the front door as you heard it unlock, freezing as you made eye contact with a very tired and very sweaty Hyunggu. He raised his eyebrow at you.

     "Hey." You muttered, finally stepping away from his door. 

     "Hey." He muttered back skeptically, looking you up and down. "What are you doing at my door?" You cleared your throat, trying your best not to think of him on his knees, desperately humping your leg as he begged you to fuck him. 

     "I was just checking to see if you were home. It's movie night, remember." 

     "Ah, right! Let me just take a shower real quick." He said with a bright smile before jogging to get some clothes from his room. You let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding when you heard the water running in the bathroom that attached his room to yours. You made your way to the living room, letting out a huff as you flopped onto the couch. You sat there for a few seconds, giving yourself a mental pep talk. Alright, you were gonna have to sit through a few movies with your roommate; easy peasy! All you have to do is concentrate on the movie so you wouldn't think about him at all. Yeah, easy. You can do this!

     You can't do this. You were practically doomed the moment he left his room, wearing some short shorts with one of your hoodies he had stolen from you a while back. The simple yet adorable outfit made your breath hitch in your throat as you thought about destroying the innocent little look he had gone for. It only got worse when he had jumped into your arms as soon as he sat down to cuddle into you; a normal thing the both of you did on movie nights but this time just felt different. A few times he even insisted you hand feed him some of the snacks you had made, making you involuntarily shiver when his lips slightly wrapped around the tip of your fingers.

     About half way through the third movie, you had run out of popcorn. You decided to use this as an opportunity to get away from him for a minute. You let out a small sigh of relief as you leaned against the counter, waiting for the popcorn to finish. You only tensed up for a second when Hyunggu made his way into the kitchen to grab a drink. He opened the cabinet and reached up to grab a cup. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. Your mind went reeling when his hoodie lifted a little bit showing off his lower back. What had caught your attention though, was the slight black lace that could be seen beneath his shorts. Was he wearing lingerie?! You let out a quiet groan which made Hyunggu turn around and look at you with wide eyes in confusion. Before you knew what you were doing, you crossed the kitchen to slam your hands on the counter on either side of him. He made a small squeaking sound as you pinned him to his spot, hands gripping the counter behind him. He gulped as he saw the dark look in your eyes, making his knees weak. 

     "Do you even know what you're doing to me? Fuck I just wanna rip everything off of you and take you right here." He whimpered at the growl in your voice, a red tint to his cheeks. 

     "(Y- Y/N) - I- W-what?" He barely whispered out hands flying up to grip your shoulders as your hands moved to grip his hips, your thigh pushing between his legs. His breathing was already heavier as you pressed your body to his.

     "Don't play dumb with me," he tensed up as you brought your hands up to massage his hips and playing with the fabric of the panties, "first the video and now this? You're practically begging me to fuck you senseless." Hyunggu tensed up in your arms, panic flashing over his features.

     "V-video? What video?" You could hear the nervousness dripping from his voice as his hands gripped your shoulders. 

     "The one you recorded of yourself playing with my toys." You growled in his ear, fingers digging into the flesh of his hips. "Did you really think you were gonna get away with that baby?" A look of horror flashed across his face, cheeks turning a firetruck red.

    "Oh my god. O-Oh my god! Y-You weren't supposed to see that. I-I'm so sorry! W-we can just pretend it n-never happened a-and you don't have to talk to me ever aga-" You cut him off with a bruising kiss to his lips, making him whimper as he slowly melted into you. His eyes were glassy and dazed once you pulled away, hands gripping the front of your shirt. 

     "Are you kidding? That was so fucking hot. I don't think I'll ever be able to let you go after seeing that." He whined as your hands reached down to squeeze his ass, simultaneously pulling his body flush against yours. He bit his lip as he brought his hands up to tangle in your hair, pulling you into another heated kiss. 

     There was no fight for dominance as your tongue pushed its way into his mouth, making you moan as he stopped to suck on the wet muscle. You grabbed his thigh, bringing it up to wrap his leg around your waist as the kiss got more intense. You used his leg to pull him into you as you began grinding your hips into his. Whimpers and moans left his mouth as he desperately bucked his hips into yours. 

     Hyunggu's mind was fuzzy as all of his thoughts were clouded with you. He couldn't believe that this was actually happening; you were kissing him. You were attracted to him the same way he was attracted to you. It seemed impossible to him and a part of himself told him that this had to be a dream. His hands were everywhere, pulling you as close to him as he could to make sure you wouldn't leave. His heart was beating a hundred miles a minute and he was sure you could hear it. His skin burned wherever your skin touched his, making him whimper into your mouth with every movement. He melted into your touch, his senses zoned in on you as he slowly forgot the world around him.

     BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

     The obnoxious sound of the microwave made you both jump as you were reminded of where you were. You opened and closed the small machine before it could beep again and turned back to the mess of a boy in front of you. You bit your bottom lip as you took in the sight of him; lips glossy and bruised, hoodie falling off one of his shoulders and showing off his collarbones, eyes dark with lust but still so innocent with the way he was looking up at you, and a light sheen of sweat glistening on his skin. His face got redder the more you stared at him, making him squirm in his spot. His breath hitched in his throat as you leaned into him again to whisper in his ear. 

     "Do you wanna head back to my room?" His legs were weak from the low tone of voice you used, making him grip onto you in order to hold himself up. He rapidly nodded his head as he looked up at you, dick twitching in his shorts at the thought of what you'd do to him. The smirk you gave in return made a shiver crawl up his spine as he followed close behind you like a lost puppy. It wasn't long before you had him pinned to the bed beneath you, whimpering as your hands slid under his sweater to play with his nipples while you sicked and bit marks on his neck.

     "If you don't mind me asking," you muttered against his neck, "why exactly did you make that video?" His face flushed red as he turned his head to try and bury his face in the pillow. You chuckled at his embarrassed state, grabbing his jaw and making him face you again. "I asked you a question baby, and I don't like being ignored." You said as you left a trail of kisses down his jaw. He whimpered quietly before nervously gulping.

     "W-well, I found this w-website a little while ago a-and people pay me a d-decent amount to watch me - w-well y'know." He muttered, refusing to look you in the eyes. "I a-already posted the video you watched earlier this m-morning before I left for the dance s-studio." You chuckled at his shy confession, reminding yourself to look into it when you have free time. You paused for a second, smirking as an idea came to mind. 

     "Would you be willing to wait here for a second babyboy?" A small smile crossed his face at the nickname while his head tilted in confusion. 

     "U-um, sure. W-why?" He gulped at the devilish smirk on your face; a whimper leaving him as you held his jaw in your hand, forcing him to hold eye contact with you. 

     "I think you still owe me an apology baby. I don't remember giving you permission to play with mommy's toys, did I?" He still looked confused as he squirmed beneath you. "I wanna make sure everyone knows how sorry you are." You muttered while nibbling on his earlobe. A small gasp passed his lips while his hips bucked into yours, arousal shooting through him as he realized what you were implying. You giggled against his ear before licking a stripe down his neck, continuing to murmur against his skin. "Those people probably didn't even know you had done anything wrong. Imagine their disappointment when they hear what a naughty boy you are." 

     "They know." You pulled back to give him a confused look, eyes blown wide with lust as he looked up at you with innocent looking eyes, though the words that fell from his lips were anything but. "I-I titled the video 'Playing with Roommate's Toys' so I'm sure the c-comments are already flooded with everyone telling me how dirty I am." He whined, cock twitching as he saw the dark look in your eyes. "I-I'm sorry mommy." He muttered, looking away from you. You left a light peck on his cheek before growling in his ear.

     "Save it for the camera." He scrambled off the bed as you pointed to the door, rushing to grab his camera. You chuckled at his eagerness, stripping yourself of your shirt and pants before walking to your closet to retrieve your toy box. Hyunggu froze in the doorway as soon as he saw you, practically drooling over your half naked body. You patted the bed, snapping him out of his trance as he walked over to obediently sit on the bed. You smirked as you dug through the small box, pulling out a few ropes with a sadistic glint in your eye that made him shiver from his place on the bed. "Well baby, let's get you ready."

     It wasn't long before you had Hyunggu undressed and tied to the headboard with the camera in your hand. You giggled at how he writhed on the bed in front of you, hips continuously bucking into the air as whimpers and whines flooded past his lips. His cheeks were flushed as he looked away from the camera, the vibrating cockring on his dick having much more of an affect on him than you thought it would. You really underestimated how sensitive he was. 

     "No no no, look at the camera baby." He whined, eyes fluttering up to meet yours.

     "But mommy…"

     "What's the matter? You didn't seem to have a problem when you were being a little whore and playing with mommy's toys without permission." He whimpered at the degrading nickname, biting his lip while his hips bucked into the air. 

     "I-I'm sorry mommy! Please! I-I'm really sorry!" He whined, eyes desperate as he begged you to let him cum. His cock was red and leaking against his stomach, twitching more as he felt closer to his release. An endless mantra of 'sorry' and 'please' fell from his lips as he started growing desperate. You giggled before turning off and removing the cockring, making him slump against the headboard and pant, trying to catch his breath. You focused the camera on his face as you cupped his cheek in your hand. 

     "Awww, look at you. So worn out and I haven't even fucked you yet." You teased, lightly running your thumb over his bottom lip. He whimpered before leaning forward to take your thumb into his mouth. He whimpered and moaned around it, looking into the camera with dark eyes full of lust. The sight went straight to your core, making you groan as you shoved the finger in deeper. He skillfully licked and sucked your finger, making you think of how pretty he would look with a cock in his mouth; maybe next time.

     "Fuck, you really want it don't you? Want mommy to pound into your tight little hole and fill you up like a filthy little cockslut." He moaned at your words, nodding his head while murmuring a muffled 'please' around your thumb. You took your hand away from his face, arousal shooting through your body as your thumb was still connected to his lips by a string of saliva. You set the camera on the chair you moved earlier so everyone would have a good view of you fucking him senseless before grabbing the lube.

      You grabbed one of his thighs and pushed his knee to his chest, giving you a better view of his hole. A part of you wanted to eat him out, edging him again, but your need to fuck him was greater so you'd save it for another time. You squeezed some lube directly onto his hole, making him gasp and squirm from the sudden coldness. You chuckled at his reaction before pushing the fake cock between his cheeks, thrusting it between them to it up. He whimpered loudly, head thrashing side to side as he begged you fuck him. You squirted a little more lube on the cock for good measure before pushing into him. His jaw dropped open in a silent moan as he threw his head back, burning hot pleasure running through him as you bottomed out. 

     "Oh fuck!" He whined out as you began thrusting into him, already starting with a fast pace. The only words able to leave him after that were the mantras of 'mommy' and frequent streams of curses. You leaned down to leave marks all over his neck and chest so he would think of you everytime he looked in a mirror for weeks. A loud cry of pleasure left him as you dug your nails into his thighs, pushing both of his knees to his chest. The new angle made you hit his prostate harder and swifter than before while reaching deeper than he ever thought possible. His broken moans echoed around the room as he got closer and closer to his release. His dick twitching and leaking against his stomach.

     "Oh- Mommy! Oh f-fuck mommy! 'M gonna cum! Hnng- so close! Fuck mommy, please!" He whined, biting his lip as he locked eyes with your dark, lust filled orbs. You smirked sadistically as you looked down at him.

     "Go ahead baby, cum all over yourself. Let mommy see how much you love feeling her cock absolutely destroying you." His eyes rolled back in his head as white ropes of cum decorated his stomach, some even spilling onto his neck. You slowed down, letting him ride out his orgasm before pulling out. You looked down at the puddle of cum that had collected on his chest, gathering it on your fingers and holding it up to his lips.

     "C'mon baby, you said you always cleaned your messes up for mommy, didn't you?" He whimpered but slowly opened his eyes as he licked his cum off of your fingers. "Good boy." You murmured, giving him a light kiss on the forehead.

     You reached up and untied his hands, kissing his wrists that were slightly red from him harshly tugging on his restraints. He let out a content hum as you left a few comforting kisses on his cheek. The circular motions you rubbed into the skin of his hips helped him calm down. He chuckled before muttering 'camera' in your ear.

     "I forgot that was there." You chuckled against his skin, nuzzling into his neck. You lazily reached over to turn the device off, taking off the strap on before cuddling back into the cute boy beneath you. He giggled as you left an onslaught of quick kisses on his face and neck.

     "Stooooop, that tickles." He giggled, weakly trying to shove you off of him. You smiled against his skin, leaving a few more before pulling away completely to hover your face directly over his. He lazily smiled up at you, eyes twinkling with love and adoration. You brushed his sweaty hair out of his face softly smiling at him as his eyes started struggling to stay open.

     "What are you looking at." He chuckled, looking away from you with a blush on his cheeks. You smiled, flopping next to him and kissing him on the lips.

     "I'm looking at my absolutely perfect boyfriend." You muttered, stroking his hair as he fell asleep. He grumbled quietly in embarrassment before pulling you closer to him so he could comfortably fall asleep. You chuckled at him, wrapping your arms around his waist before drifting to sleep. 

     You were a little disappointed when you woke up to cold sheets beside you instead of Hyunggu, almost making you think last night was a dream. You lazily stood up, pulling on some sweatpants and an undershirt before wandering to the main living area. The inviting smell of eggs brought you to the kitchen, where you found Hyunggu peacefully cooking. You smiled as you realized he was still wearing the hoodie he stole from you as he hummed a random song under his breath. He jumped when you snuck up behind him, wrapping your arms lovingly around his waist. He smiled up at you pressing a quick kiss to your jaw with a quiet 'good morning'. You muttered a greeting back, swaying with him as he continued humming.

"I'm never getting this back am I?" You asked as you tugged on the hoodie he was wearing. He turned to look at you with an adorable smile.

"Nope." You laughed at his reply, burying your face in his hair. A contented hum left you as you breathed in his scent, wondering what you had done in a past life to deserve him.

#dom!reader #dom reader #sub!idol #sub idol #sub!kpop #sub kpop #sub!kino #sub kino #sub!hyunggu #sub hyunggu #pentagon #pentagon reactions #pentagon smut #pentagon imagines #pentagon scenarios #ptg smut #sub!pentagon #sub pentagon #kpop imagines #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #kpop smut

[fallin-4-ya]

The Follies and Vices of You

cedric diggory x reader- part iv of series 

based off the novel and film ‘Pride and Prejudice’ by Jane Austen

summary: Being the beloved sister of the incredibly wealthy Mr. Potter, you felt no need to rush into marriage. But one day, when you come to meet a new acquaintance, the proud Mr. Diggory, your views of love and follies change.

warnings: a bit of angst & tension! (gif is not mine, credit to owner!)

part i, part ii, part iii, part iv, part v

‘Maybe it’s that I find it hard to forgive the follies and vices of others, or their offenses against me. My good opinion, once lost, is lost forever.’ -Jane Austen 

The month of January passed dreadfully slow, as you waited for something interesting to happen. As the snow fell softly onto the ground, thoughts wondered through your head rapidly, most of them involving Mr. Diggory. In fact, he occupied your mind most days. How dreadfully awkward that poor man is, you pondered, and yet how confident. His character never made sense to you, as awfully as he appeared on the outside, you could tell there was much beneath his many layers. But your thoughts were soon interrupted by a knock on the door, it was the post.

‘From Miss Ginerva, Miss Y/N.’ You smiled and nodded thankfully. Excited, you ripped the letter open and the inside read,

My Dearest Miss Y/N, I hope my letter find you very well. How dreadful these past few days have been, for all of this snow has made me think of nothing besides summer time. I was invited to stay at my brother Bill’s until the end February; Miss Hermione Granger will be attending alongside me, to encourage sisterly bonding. I am sorry to hear that Mr. Malfoy has resided back to his home up north, but I do hope that he continues to write you such pretty verses. I shall be home before the flowers bloom. Be well.

Much love, Ginerva

You sighed thinking of how even more boring the next few months would be without the company of a most dear friend. 

Now that Mr. Malfoy was sent back home, the house was quieter than ever. Between Harry managing the estate, Sirius writing business proposals and Mr. Lupin locked up in the library; you felt most unentertained and gittery. Letters began being sent to you the day after he left, expressing a fondness for you, which kept your boredom to a minimum. You thought long about the letters exchanged between you and Mr. Malfoy; Ginny was certainly right in saying the verses were beautiful. She also urged you that there would soon be a proposal on the line if he kept with the letters, though you secretly hoped it wouldn't be anytime soon.

The next evening, to much of your excitement, you were joined by Mr. Fred and George Weasley for dinner, who were in the company of nobody other than Mr. Diggory. Reaching a hand out for each of the Weasley men, they took it graciously planting a kiss upon it. Extending out to Mr. Diggory as well, he ignored your gesture and simply bowed in your direction. After the questionable gesture from the latter of the men, you lead them to the dining room, where the rest of your family awaited.

The evening was going splendidly, much laughter and wide smiles reigned. That was, until a letter arrived addressed to you from Mr. Malfoy. You excused yourself from the table, to retire to the parlor to read it.

Blushing profusely and smiling at the beautiful verses addressed to you, unaware of the floorboards that creaked viciously behind; you sat on the armchair nearest the window of the parlor. You heard a throat clear at the doorway and shot your head up.

 ‘Mr. Diggory! I am so sorry, I mustn’t have heard of your following.’ Humming to yourself, you gazed out the window, ‘I do love this time of the year, Mr. Diggory. The snow is nothing short of lovely.’

‘Yes, Miss Potter, I do agree that the snow is very beautiful but I must interject and beckon you about some-‘

‘He’s thought to propose, you know. Mr. Malfoy that is. Quite strange, isn’t it; how young girls go to young women with only a proposal.’ You unknowingly interrupted in your dream state.

‘Miss Potter, I truly cannot help but to interject; however, there is a matter of urgency I’d like to discuss.’ Mr. Diggory huffed. Being pulled out of your trance, patience grew thin, you turned your head and snapped, ‘What is it, Mr. Diggory, that you feel so inclined to interrupt me for?’

‘Its addressing Mr. Malfoy. You see I am afraid I must interject on a most sensitive discussion topic.’

‘If you have anything negative to say about Mr. Malfoy, I must urge you that I'm the last person who would be inclined to hear it! And if you have some here to ruin my evening, I am afraid I won’t allow it.’ 

With that you grabbed your coat and trekked out into the falling snow. Footsteps not far behind you, you sped up; unwilling, or rather unwanting of hearing what anybody had to say. The crunching of snow only following you farther, as you followed the angelic pathway to the stone pavilion in the graden. You threw your back against the wall, sighing out deeply. Without a moment of peace Mr. Diggory entered your presence.

‘You cannot marry him’

You were taken aback by his sudden bluntness. Exasperated by his cultivated occurrence of strange actions you cocked your head at him.

‘May I ask you why, Mr. Diggory?’

‘The Malfoy family is least cordial, completely unattached and deranged from society. They are completely unsuitable for a family such as yours.’

‘A family such as mine?! Have you come here to separate an engagement or to insult my family, Mr. Diggory? Or rather, does your sudden interest in my affairs have anything to do with your dislike towards Mr. Malfoy; because believe me, Mr. Diggory, I know well of your disputes with the poor gentleman and will not stop an engagement from happening due to your pride and arrogance.’

‘No, Miss Potter! You know perfectly well that I find your family most respectable. I just find their family uncommony stiff for your reckless behavior.’

‘Reckless behavior! How dare you insult not only my upkeeping but a personality of another. Have you forgotten the follies and vices of you, Mr. Diggory? For who are you to judge another?’

‘Miss Y/N, has it ever occurred to you that you may be too harsh on me or perhaps my light on you may have been caused by the misjudgment of one’s character? I beg of you to enlighten me on why you find me the most disagreeable man.’

‘Well then, I beg you, Mr. Diggory, why you wish to separate a young couple who have grown quite fond of each other?’

‘Because I love you.’

There was a lull and Mr. Diggory halted. ‘I love you most ardently and I could not have you go another day more without you knowing of the likeness I have for you.’

You stood in silence, snow falling ever so godly on you both, speechless. Words clouded your mind, and you wanted to scream, and cry, and love, and erupt all at the same time. But rather than doing any of them, you looked back on him with a haze in your eyes.

‘I would not marry you if you were the last man in the world.’ You said walking away, allowing a tear slip silently from your face.

The next day there was a knock on your bedroom door early in the morning. Mr. Diggory walked in humbled and shy, ‘Miss Y/N, I’ve come to leave this for you. I hope you do me the honor to read it. Thank you much for your time.’

You had not even reached his gaze, for he spoke for too quickly and you were far too angry. Staring at the enveloped with a tear stained face for nearly an hour, you decided to open it.

Dear Miss Potter,

I hope my letter finds you in good health. I do not wish to impose on you again what I have said last night; for I am writing to you today not to remind you of said words, but rather converse upon the accusations you have brought upon me. I urge you that everything in this letter is the truth and have many to testify upon it.

Mr. Draco Malfoy and I had been connected since infancy, for his father, Lucius, and mine worked exceptionally close together. However, as Mr. Malfoy grew he became reckless; he gambled a large portion of his father’s money away and took no responsibilities seriously. Soon thereafter, his father wrote him out of his will, leaving nothing to his son. Mr. Malfoy became desperate for an inheritance; my father later offered him a job which he begrudgingly took. However, not more than seven months of work, he confessed a most passionate love to my sister. It did not take long for us to realize that he was only after her fortune for she was to inherit seven thousand pound a year. She was thirteen at the time and utterly heartbroken.

When my sister had gotten sick mere months later, my mother and I moved to London alongside her to get the best medical help. Unable to access our money without my father present, Mr. Lucius graciously lent us the sum of the bills. Unfortunately, my sister passed with just two months of treatment; she was truly a remarkable young woman. After the mourning, we paid what was due back to the Malfoy family; but for Mr. Draco Malfoy it was not enough. He hounded me for more money; knowing his dispositions I had given him the sum of his ask in hopes that he would become something of himself. He gambled the money away in two weeks. After that, I refused to give him anymore money, cutting him off for good.

Miss Y/N, I am terribly sorry to force the burden of the truth onto you, but I just felt that you ought to know. Please do keep the affairs containing my sister private, as I believe it be a disgrace to her memory to attach her name to one like his. Thank you for the time we have shared.

Yours, Mr. Cedric Diggory

(author’s note: oh my goodness! end of part 4!!! ending on a bit of a cliff hanger... i can't wait for you all to read the final chapter, which will be out soon! as always, let me know if you’d like to be part of this tag list! thank you as always for reading!)

tag list: @freddieweasleyswife @truly-insatiable @annasdani @mullthingsoverinthehotwater

#Harry Potter #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter headcanon #cedric diggory #cedric diggory x reader #cedric diggory x you #ginny weasley #fred weasley #george weasley #Draco Malfoy #Ron Weasley #hermione granger #pride and predujice #jane austen #draco malfoy x reader #sirius black #remus lupin

[damn-behzinga]

Losing The War Against Himself

Ethan Payne (Behzinga) Centric

summary - Ethan is losing the war of depression but other soldiers are going to fight beside him and help him win

warnings - depression, self harm, suicidal thoughts, angst, panic attacks, swearing, my terrible writing

masterlist and request info

Sometimes, Ethan didn't want to talk about his weight loss. Sometimes, Ethan looked in the mirror and still felt disgusting and fat. He would feel terrible about himself and work out more and eat less, trying to get rid of the fattiness he felt but couldn't see.

The other sidemen knew that something was off with Ethan on these days but since he hadn't told them, they remained in the dark and confused about the situation.

Ethan was pretty open about how he looked up to the other sidemen and their lifestyle, especially JJ. JJ who was so strong and fit, who looked like how Ethan could only dream of.

Ethan just stood in front of the mirror and cried, he felt so disgusting, every way he looked at himself, he looked distorted. Ethan wanted to vomit when he looked at himself, ignoring all progress he made from the last two years, only seeing himself as the fat man he knew from before.

Ethan dried his tears, there's no way in Hell he would let his friends see him like that. So weak and sensitive. And so, to stop them from seeing him in any way that showed weakness, Ethan slowly went back into his shell, becoming a shell of their best friend. The sidemen were confused to put it simply and hurt. They had spent months getting Ethan to open up to them and all of a sudden he went back into that shell. The last time he felt like that was in 2015 and they did not want to go back down that route again.

Ethan's habits worsened. He'd show up for shoots, complete them and then leave. If it was an all-day shoot then he'd arrive on time and leave during his breaks, even if it was just for a walk around the block. He would go out of his way to avoid his friends, hardly interacting with them and not commenting on much during filming. He was like a zombie. His friends knew they had to find out what was wrong and helped him before it was too late.

Ethan was at his flat when the guys came over to confront him. He was simply lying in bed, not having the energy to get up or do anything productive. The men knocked on the door but Ethan didn't answer, too lost in his head. Ethan had given them all a spare key when he first moved so Tobi used it and they all entered the flat, searching for their friend.

"Ethan?" Simon called lightly, looking around the living room. When the men came up empty, Tobi nodded towards Ethan's door and so the group stood at the doorway and saw their best friend in bed.

"Go away, lads." Ethan's voice was hoarse from the lack of use but the emptiness was evident.

"We can't leave you alone like this," Josh said softly making his way through the messy room.

"Where's Charlie?" Tobi asked, noting Ethan's missing roommate.

"He moved out with his girlfriend," Ethan muttered. "He left, why can't you?"

"Because we're worried about you man," JJ answered honestly, his voice rarely soft.

"You don't have to be. I'm not worth your time." Ethan argued weakly.

"Ethan, when was the last time you showered?" Vik asked.

"I don't know. After the last shoot, I suppose." Ethan shrugged.

The friends exchanged looks, that was five days ago.

"When was the last time you ate a proper meal?" Harry questioned.

"I don't know," Ethan answered. "What does it matter guys? I'm still the fat kid I'm losing some weight now at least."

Both Simon and Tobi flinched at Ethan's words.

"Okay," Josh whispered. "You're gonna shower or have a bath and we're going to get you some food. Is there anything you want specifically?" 

"I don't care," Ethan said back, voice breaking slightly. "You guys shouldn't either. All I do is bring you down. Can't you go home and leave me alone, please?"

Harry wanted to give in and leave Ethan alone and hope that he would get better the next day and return to good old Ethan they knew and loved. But Harry knew that he needed to stay, that if he left his friend then the results could be tragic.

"We can't do that, mate," Tobi whispered. "Just go take a shower and take a breather. We're staying right here."

Ethan couldn't be bothered to argue, so he pushed himself up in bed, joints clicking after not being used for however long. JJ helped Ethan up, seeing how weak he was. Holding an arm underneath his shoulders to support him to the bathroom.

Despite the stumbling, Ethan made it to the bathroom. He turned and looked at the men and closed the door behind him and soon the men heard the water running. Josh turned to the group and started planning things.

"Okay, Simon and JJ will clean up Ethan's room. Vik and I will take the living room, and Tobi and Harry will knock out the washing up in the kitchen. I'll order us all some food." Josh explained. Everyone nodded and went to their respective rooms to clean up.

About fifteen minutes later, the rooms were clean and Ethan stepped out the bathroom, feeling clean for the first time in days, wearing a new pair of jogging bottoms and a long sleeve top. Josh was the first to greet him, having stood outside in case anything happened.

"What do you want to do now?" Josh asked.

"I want you guys to leave me alone," Ethan grumbled, walking to his room.

"Well, I was thinking about watching a movie or something?" Josh replied, completely dismissing Ethan's idea.

Ethan ignored his friend and sat on his bed. Throwing his towel into the laundry basket. He stayed silent and started searching through his drawers.

"What are you looking for?" Josh asked.

"My fags." Ethan sighed.

"I hid them," JJ answered, shrugging slightly.

"Why the fuck would you do that?" Ethan asked. "For fuck sake." Ethan slammed one if his draws shut. "I need them."

"You don't need them," JJ argued. "You need something else, those fags are gonna kill you."

"So?" Ethan growled. JJ and Josh were left speechless as Ethan ran out of the room to search the rest of the flat.

"What are you looking for?" Harry asked as Ethan looked in the cupboards.

"My cigs," Ethan answered briefly as he came up empty.

Harry let out a small, 'oh' and Ethan continued to search. Ethan's hands started shaking as he urged for a cigarette.

"You don't need them, Ethan," Simon explained.

"You just need to try and calm down. Let us help. You're going through a rough patch and that's okay, let us help." Tobi said softly. Ethan huffed out and breath and turned to face the friends.

"Please, Ethan." Vik pleaded.

"Don't any of you fucking understand?" Ethan yelled, his depression causing frustration and anger. "No, you don't. So fuck off and leave me alone."

"Not whilst you're like this," Simon exclaimed.

"Can't you just leave me alone?" Ethan begged. "Please, I'm fine by myself."

"Ethan, it's okay to admit you're not okay." JJ took a step forward causing Ethan to take a step back to avoid contact. 

"Go." Ethan pleaded, eyes watering with tears. He was trembling, close to a panic attack.

"Hey, Ethan. It's okay." Josh tried to ground Ethan, calling him by his name. He stepped forward and Ethan pushed himself against the counter. He slid down the counter and placed his hands on either side of his head. 

Panic was clawing at his throat and Ethan couldn't focus on anything, he started scratching at his arms, hard enough that red lines were becoming noticeable. Fast-paced breaths escaped Ethan as his scratches didn't calm him, he started to punch at his head, angry for being so weak and he just wanted to go back to normal. He couldn't breathe. He didn't want to let anyone down and yet here he was crying like a baby.

He was shaking, crying. He couldn't focus on anything, he continued to punch his head harder, as he sobbed. He couldn't breathe. Why couldn't he breathe? His breaths escalated, shallow breathes escaped him, unable to focus on taking proper deep breaths. The men watched in agony not knowing how to help their friend. Josh made the first move.

"Ethan?" Josh touched Ethan's arm lightly. Ethan immediately retaliated and threw his arm out, punching Josh on the cheek.

Josh fell back.

It was like Ethan could suddenly see what was happening. He looked down at his fists and then at his friend who was now being looked after by Tobi and JJ. Ethan let out a 'sorry' before running into his room and locking the door.

"Fuck, I'm so, so, sorry." Ethan sobbed, hands covering his eyes.

He backed away from the door and sat on the bed, calming himself down. Ethan eventually calmed down and heard knocking on the door.

"Ethan. Can I come in?" It was from Josh.

"No," Ethan muttered.

"Please?" Josh continued to beg.

"I hurt you, Josh. What kind of friend am I? I'm horrible." Ethan mumbled.

"What if I hurt you again?"

"You didn't hit that hard, Ethan. It barely hurt. You were scared, Ethan. It's okay." Josh smiled. 

"Is it?" Ethan asked. "All I wanted my fucking cigs and yet I hurt you instead."

Ethan heard some shuffling outside the door and finally accepted that his friend had left as he deserved.

There was a knock at his door and Ethan stood up and wobbly walked to the door and unlocked it. He poked his head through and saw Josh holding out a packet of cigarettes.

"As much as I hate it." Josh frowned. "You can quit but I know it's hard. I'll give you time and we can work on that together but you need to focus on getting mentally better before quitting."

Ethan nodded and took the packet of cigarettes and the lighter. He walked out and thanked Josh quietly. He made his way to the balcony and kept his head low as he walked past his friends, ashamed and embarrassed.

He took out a fag and started smoking. He watched as cars drove past and the boats in the Thames. He often thought about how much it would hurt if he jumped off the balcony or if he drowned himself in the Thames. He quickly finished the cigarette and realised he had nowhere to put it out. Before he crushed it on the floor or put it out in his sink, he rolled up his sleeve and pressed the cigarette against his arm, allowing the burning sensation to take over him. He took a sharp intake of breath before throwing the cigarette on the floor and crushing it under his foot.

He walked back inside the flat and looked at his friends who sat on his sofa.

"Did you hurt yourself with the cigarette?" Vik asked.

"I'm sorry," Ethan whispered before sobbing.

The men frowned at their friend, emotional at the idea of their friend hurting himself.

"I just hate myself so much. I deserve so what's the point?" Ethan shrugged.

"Why are you worried? All I do is bring you down."

"Ethan, you do not bring us down, at all. We love you so much more than what you could imagine." Simon smiled.

"If I died, the sun would still rise, the channel would still exist, people would continue living. It wouldn't change anything. I am insignificant." Ethan explained. "I hate everything about myself."

"You're acting as though we would still upload on the Sidemen channel if you died," Tobi said.

"Why wouldn't you?" Ethan asked.

"Because it wouldn't be the same." JJ immediately interrupted. "You say that everything would stay the same but it wouldn't. We would all be heartbroken, your viewers would be heartbroken. What about your mum, huh? How would we have to explain that to her? You've said it yourself, she's already lost so much."

"But I deserve it, Jide," Ethan whispered. "That's the difference between you guys and me. You guys help people and solve problems, I am the problem."

"You are not a problem, and I can promise you that," Vik whispered. "Yes, you can cause problems but so do all of us, we're human. But, you are not the sole problem."

"If you were we would tell you," Harry said honestly.

"I want to die, guys and I don't think you realise that," Ethan whispered sadly.

"We can get you professional help, and we can help," Tobi said. "You aren't alone, Ethan."

"Just tell us one thing that is bothering you," Josh suggested. "We can help you solve that problem and work with you on it." 

Ethan bit his lip and wrapped his arms around his torso, quickly becoming aware of each one of his insecurities. He thought over every single one of his insecurities and chose the one he knew his friends could agree with.

"I hate the way I look." He whispered. "I look in the mirror and I feel like I could throw up."

"What specifically?" Simon asked.

"I don't like how much skin I have. I'm still fat, my face is ugly. My smile is annoying. My nose is crooked and I have such boring eyes. My legs are an awful shape and my arms are so awkward that I've started covering them with tattoos."

His friends all felt sadness run over them at the idea that Ethan pointed out all insecurities one person could have.

"You aren't fat, mate," JJ stated firmly. "You've made so much progress from what you did look like."

"I look in the mirror and I still look like what I did three years ago," Ethan growled. "I'm still the fat kid who doesn't have any other personality trait apart from the fact that I'm fat."

Josh frowned at his friend. "I get it. I didn't have as big as a transformation as you but to fat kid from the other fat kid, I get it. Sometimes, you look in the mirror and you feel like you've made no progress at all, or too little progress. But I promise you that you should feel proud of the progress you've made now."

Everyone looked at the two friends, all of them had been relatively fit all their life or when they did gain weight, it didn't affect them. They never clicked how much someone could hate themselves even after as big of a transformation.

"Ethan, can't you see how much you've changed?" Tobi asked and, as he was pretty fit all his life, he had a fast metabolism, and he would never fully grasp the idea of not liking any mind-blowing changes that you make to yourself. 

"It's not enough, the skin is still hanging off me. Every time I look in the mirror, I see the fat guy I've been for the past ten years." Ethan sighed. "It makes me want to vomit. How could I let myself become so disgusting? I'll never be good enough."

"You're good enough no matter what size," Simon affirmed. "No matter what you look like. As long as you stay true to yourself I don't care."

Ethan rolled his eyes and stayed silent, he couldn't be bothered to argue back. What was the point? All he does is ruin every situation so why should he argue again? 

"I think you're handsome," Harry said honestly. "You're the most handsome one out of all of us."

Ethan ignored his friend's comment, unable to understand how his friends could perceive him in any way that wasn't a horrible and gross man.

"Can we stop talking about it please?" Ethan whispered, tired eyes watching his friends. They all nodded softly.

The group all started doing more activities with Ethan, eager to show their support during hard times. Simon would go to Ethan's flat and help him clean up. After Ethan had mentioned to the lads that sometimes he couldn't find the energy to do anything and that life seemed to go by faster then he was aware of, Simon decided that every Monday and Thursday, he would help Ethan out with basic chores. Ethan insisted that he didn't have to clean up but seeing his friend so enthusiastic about cleaning wasn't something he wanted to ruin. A weight was lifted off his chest when he realised that he didn't have to live in a dirty environment due to the fact he couldn't find any energy to clean because Simon was there to help.

"You don't have to clean after me, Si."

"I enjoy it though! It helps you out and I like doing it. It's fine honestly."

JJ encouraged Ethan to go to the gym with him. It started twice a week because Ethan wouldn't get out of bed otherwise. It started with JJ encouraging Ethan to go on a run with him, and then into the private rooms of the gym, and then the normal gym. JJ let Ethan go at his own pace for things before slowly going faster and adding more to his workouts. JJ made sure to emphasise that it was okay that Ethan wasn't as good as him but that he should keep trying. Ethan felt a great sense of achievement every time JJ pointed something out that he did well. Ethan didn't tell JJ explicitly how much he helped but JJ knew, he always knew.

"Jide, I can't do it. I'm so weak compared to you."

"Mate you got to 70KGs. That's something to be proud of. You are not weak at all."

Josh showed up every few days and sorted out every one of Ethan's emails and business calls that Ethan couldn't find himself to sort out. Ethan got a lot of letters and emails from potential sponsors and his managers. Josh helped Ethan sort through them, taking business calls that Ethan got too much anxiety from. The two of them sat at the table as Ethan sorted out whether or not he wanted to get involved with sponsorships or how to reply. Ethan often told Josh that he was the best at organising and so Josh came forward to help him sort everything out. Ethan was usually relatively organised but he couldn't find it in himself to sort business stuff out. Josh pulled through with emails and helped Ethan sorting through his mail. Ethan would have been in a lot of shit if Josh hadn't helped, a weight was lifted off his shoulders.

"So GymShark want you to promote a few new items, I've had that be sorted to deliver for next Tuesday."

"Thank you, Josh, I couldn't do this without you."

Harry's way of helping as he came over to Ethan's flat he helped Ethan with some self-care. Both Harry and Ethan would sit on the sofa with facemasks and a movie on TV. Harry would order food and tell Ethan to have a bath. Harry and Ethan would sit on the sofa and, if Ethan wanted to, they would talk about whatever was on their minds. If not, they'd chat shit and Ethan would listen to Harry rant about something stupid. Ethan would smile and feel all his worrying thoughts float away as he listened to the younger rant about whatever he wanted.

"And then she said I was being ridiculous, can you believe that?"

"Careful, Harry, you're smudging the facemask." 

Vik often asked Ethan to go out with him. Whether it was shopping for groceries or just for a walk, Vik always offered for Ethan to come along. And if Ethan didn't want to, Vik would pick up the usual shopping for him, supplying him with necessities. Ethan would try and use the items that Vik brought but when Ethan couldn't find the energy to get out of bed, Vik would come round and cook him food. On other days, Ethan would go out with Vik on small days out to the aquarium or zoo. Although it wasn't his kind of day out, hearing Vik talk about his week grounded Ethan in a way he couldn't describe.

"I got a few videos edited yesterday so I'm ahead of schedule if you need any help."

"I'd appreciate the help, Vik, thank you."

Compliments were where Tobi shined. He would send daily compliments to Ethan and, when they saw each other in person, he would compliment Ethan more. Although the other's did compliment Ethan, Tobi went out of his way to come up with something original every time and think outside the box. It started with small things, an outfit or video idea, and then snowballed into much more. Tobi would compliment the way Ethan held himself or a personality trait Ethan had. He would also hype him up on social posting pictures of the two of them with heartfelt captions and compliments.

"I love the way you see things, gives us a better perspective."

"You think so, Tobi?"

The fans were confused with the sudden appreciation for Ethan going around on social media. Ethan felt loved by his friends which were a big change in his original depressed thoughts. Depression didn't leave hi straight away and it wouldn't ever but his friends helped him out of most depressed holes that came his way. Ethan wouldn't get better overnight and they knew that, so each day they would remind him how precious he is and he was worth it. And, after a while, Ethan started to believe it too.

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