#i have a phone as a distraction now

[wrenwhite]

i've become somewhat obsessed with the oldest versions of some neopets' designs. i really vastly prefer the old jetsam and flotsam, as well as the old design for lenny. the updated lenny stripped it of its jester-like design elements which, imo, muddled and confused the point of its design. i liked its old jester hat and slightly curly toes, as well as its large, floppy-looking, goofy face.

also, i thought the oldest version of kacheeks was really funny. the drawing was kind of meant to be a visual joke, like, an over-rendered and uncannily shiny, but super simplified character like in ancient 3D art. but i feel like it doesn't really come through. oh well lol.

to tell you the truth, i don't really like the official art of ogrins. but i do think their design has potential (despite being somewhat wasted, lol). after all, they are a very odd and unique take on chimeras, being a cross between a goat, a tiger, and with other elements that don't have anything to do with real animals (their ears and tail make me think of fraggles).

regardless, they're really fun to draw.

this was a test drawing i did with the purpose of using glitter nail polish to see how it would look applied to a piece of art. surprisingly, not bad in photos, but obviously much more appealing irl. this would make great decorations to put on stuff like con badges. if only i ever went to cons, lmao.

#neopets #fanart #art #colored pencils #markers #traditional art #jetsam #flotsam #chia #kacheek #lenny #ogrin #kau #o ya also i used a paper texture for the bg in the first pic cuz pure white looked bad to me #i always want to erase the bg bc i don't like the gradient phone pics always have #but i also hate how the pure white looks next to the textured art #so i just stuck a texture in there #i'll probaby do that from now on to make it look more natural and less distracting

[puppyeared]

ive made myself more wet and pathetic

#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL #its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed #because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH #how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would #be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing #or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late #i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed #the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either #because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember #the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either #the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with #crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure #BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION #im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real #really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and #thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT #you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without #making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY #yapping #doodles #puppysona #edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule #and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened

[mainapnifavouritehoon]

hi guys i-

#Hey so i wanted to talk about this really bad this has been bothering me for quite some time #i have been busy a lot these days and i dont get time at all to do anything but i can see myself wasting my time just scrolling #I have school and then coaching and then ofc i have to study on my own for which i barely take out time as im highly careless #My last 2 exams went absolute shit and that fucking scares me because i'll be having my JEE soon #Mummy has been telling me to stay away from my phone and ik she trusts me but she but she deserves a daughter that studies ig? #And now i kind of consider that as an option because this phone is very very distracting #I have been thinking about deactivating but i realized it would mean i would lose all my precious posts and interactions #So i wont be deleting this blog as i am too attached (i will be coming back istg) #I will be taking a break and ig thats what yall call a hiatus #I will be giving away my phone to my parents (trust me i have to) #Ik this will be hard for me to just leave all of a sudden so i'll slowly start vanishing if that makes sense? #This message also doesnt mean that i will be shutting down my phone rn at this moment and that this is goodbye #This is just to prepare the people that i love and who love me that i will be highly inactive and not come online for maybe months #This is not an impulsive decisions i have really thought through this #Also just to tell you again MAIN ABHI GAYAB NAHI HONE WAALI BUT THODE TIME MEIN I WILL GO ON A BREAK THIS IS JUST A PRE HIATUS MESSAGE #Also i hope you guys will still love me and remember me once i come back #Because coming months are going to be hard for me #I hope you understand and ily guys okay? #(Oh god why am i so dramatic about everything) xoxo

[jamiethebeeart]

⊂⁠(^‿^)⁠つ⊂⁠(⁠･⁠ω⁠･⁠*⁠⊂⁠)

#spinaraki #spinneraki #shuichi iguchi #shigaraki tomura #mha spinner #mha fanart #bnha #mha #ive still been thinking about them A LOT. havent been posting because i have agdjflf so many wips instead #was actually working on an honest to goodness animation before i got distracted by the end of school and gifts and job searching ect ect #i might write a little stand alone fic for this 👀👀👀 the idea is simple enough with no extraneous plot so its doable #this is sketchy as hell cause i havent drawn for like a week or two or three.... anyways #lets say that Shiggy's pinky isnt touching on the left +his thumb isnt touching on the right. im not about to go fix it now so (⁠◡⁠ ⁠ω⁠ ⁠◡⁠ #my friend accidentally discover their phone keyboard had the classic emoticon characters and since finding it on my phone ive #been using them so much! theyre so fun to use + i dont have to go searching through databases for them (like the old days) lmao #mha jbee

[disappointparents]

beskar armor that says “babygirl” across the ass

#tumblr ate the quality you know the deal #the mandalorian #din djarin #star wars #star wars art #pedro pascal #art #i’m having fun doing 90 ish minutes of just straight drawing #i haven’t been doing a ton of art #digital or otherwise #so it’s really nice #i’m not very strict though i get up for snacks distractions phone etc etc #but it gets me drawing and i’m trying to have fun sharing art now even when it’s not like my finest most beautiful fine art #anyway. shiny man make brain churn #technically this isn’t a prompt but technically he DOES pilot #starwarstober #chiara’s inktober 22 #chiara’s art tag

[the-cookie-of-doom]

for a while now, I've really been doubting my career choices with nursing. I know a lot of it is burn out and depression, and being so overwhelmed between work, school, and clinical, that I didn't have time to breathe. I was in the hospital/on campus for 60 hours a week last semester, and that's not counting the time I had to study outside of that. It was awful. I quit my job because of it, I was almost involuntarily committed because of it.

But the scariest part for me has been how much I've hated clinical. It makes me miserable. And that's terrifying, because once I graduate? That's what I'm going to be doing for the rest of my life. So if I already hate it now, what does that mean for my future?

Sometimes, though... Sometimes I'll have a clinical that is just so good, it reminds me of why I'm doing this. Why I'm putting myself through the pain and suffering of becoming a nurse, which is honestly one of the hardest careers a person can have. It's mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausting. It destroys your body and your mental health. Most of the time it's thankless. It doesn't pay nearly enough for what we go through.

Despite all of the reasons there are not to become a nurse, there are some patients that will remind you why it's all worth it anyway.

Last week, I had a crotchety old bitch of a patient. She had been in the hospital for 10 days, was refusing all of her treatments, screamed at anyone that came in her room, and demanded dilaudid around the clock, despite having no injuries to justify it. Everyone hated her. Her own nurses went in her room as little as possible; I think in the entire 12 hours I was there, her nurse spent maybe a total of 20 minutes in her room. I was in there for hours. A couple minutes at a time in the beginning just so she could warm up to me. Then I spent 2 straight hours at her bedside just talking to her. Letting her tell me her life story. Which was tragic, of course, and no wonder she was so run down and bitter and wanted to get high off narcotics. She was miserable, lonely, and in chronic pain from a body that was deteriorating around her.

So I spent as much time with her as possible. Sure enough, she didn't ask me for any pain medications a single time, once she realized she could trust I was going to look after her. I Explained her medications and her treatments, and the reasoning behind them. I offered to reach out to out chaplain when I noticed she was hyper focused on some televangical broadcast. I got her to call her son to come visit her. I got her to agree to take her medications and allow us to take blood sample for her labs, which were days overdue. I got her up and working with physical therapy so she could start walking again.

By the end of the day, that patient loved me. Not a single complaint all day, she wasn't screaming down the halls and cursing everyone's existence. She was still crotchety and mean in that way old hillbillies are, but she wasn't angry. She wasn't lashing out. She was finally being cooperative. All because I took the time to talk to her and offer her company.

Tonight, I had a shift in our mental health unit. There was a patient who I noticed was very withdrawn and avoiding everyone, mostly just standing in a corner at the end of the hall, by a window. I went down and talked to him. Kind of stilted at first, but slowly he opened up to me. I really only meant to talk for a few minutes, mostly for my own sake, to get used to interacting with mental health patients like this.

Instead, we talked for hours. Nearly 3 hours straight at the start of the day alone, and then more throughout the day. My feet were killing me by the end of it, but it was completely worth it to see the way this poor guy came to life. We talked about everything from social topics like music and movies, to his medications and treatments, and how to manage his depression once he leaves. Something I was able to connect with him about on a personal level in a way his nurse hadn't, because I've been living with depression for a decade, I've been on antidepressants, and I understand. I think that was the point it clicked for him, when he really started reaching out to me, instead of answering when I prompted him. Because humans need connection and understanding.

By the end of the day he was talking freely and smiling nearly non-stop. We'd made plans for him to get back into an old hobby he hadn't touched in years, and he seemed genuinely excited to start it back up again. He was nearly bouncing in place when I went to say goodbye to him at the end of the night, and thanked me for talking to him all day. Even the staff nurses noticed the way his demeanor had completely changed.

Another patient (my actual patient for the night) started the day very combative. To the point she had to be redirected to her room (not locked up, just strongly encouraged to go and cool down). She was screaming at everyone, having some very serious and severe delusions. Same story; I talked to her throughout the day, little bits whenever she was feeling calm. I noticed she had a tattoo from an old semi-niche XBox game I used to play, and we bonded over that. By the end of the shift she loved me. Kept asking me if I'd gotten lunch/dinner, made sure all the other patients on the unit got their snacks, told us all to get some rest once it was curfew for the unit (we had to stay another 2 hours) and said we could use the spare bed in her room if we needed. Which sounds really weird but coming from her was incredibly sweet. Again, total attitude change.

I am very cognizant of the fact that the way I approach my patient care is largely a privilege of still being a student. It's easy for me to stand at a patient's bedside for 2 hours straight and listen to her life story when I have nothing better to do, let alone 3 other patients to take care of. But that nurse didn't talk to her at all. Even when she was in the room, she dismissed everything the patient said. The mental health nurses? Most of their time is spent in the nursing station gossiping and messing on their phones. There's no reason for them not to put in the extra effort of spending time with their patients. And especially there, it can have such an impact.

All of that is to say, I love the relationships I'm able to build with my patients. It's so important for me to be able to connect with people like this, to make them feel seen and cared for and important. No one wants to be treated like an inconvenience, especially not while they're in the hospital, sick and hurt and exhausted and in pain.

Nights like these are why I'm going into this field. I love medicine and I always knew I would end up in the hospital, I've always wanted to be able to save someone's life. But I think now that I've grown up and I'm actually working with these patients, I've come to see not only how rewarding it is to save someone's life, but to nurture that life, too.

#cookie speaks #dont mind me i'm just feeling really sappy #im really proud of what i was able to accomplish with that patient today #he's going home tomorrow and i really hope he's able to do the things we talked about #i truly love being able to help people this way #i want to be the kind of nurse that people remember #i want my patients to feel taken care of and cared for #i dont have a single maternal bone in my body and i never thought i was much of a caretaker #but this is genuinely such a rewarding experience #i dont care how hard nursing is when I get to have days like these #I know it won't be nearly as easy once I start nursing for real #ill have so much more responsibility #but for now I'm going to take advantage of my ability to sit and talk with my patients for hours at a time #i think even if they aren't psychiatric patients #everyone wants to be heard #having someone's undivided attention makes you feel good #especially in this day and age where people are constantly talking over each other and distracted by their phones and never really present #in a conversation #so I always try to give that to others #i love therapeutic communication lol #one of my favorite parts of nursing #anyway

[nebulouscoffee]

genuine question does anyone know what to do when you feel like a nervous breakdown is coming? like is there a solid reliable way to stop it or at least prevent it from getting really bad

#dw I'm okay at the moment... I think #distracting myself by making a playlist lol #but I had one earlier this week & I'm still kind of scared from it #literally couldn't move or talk or do anything for the whole day #like my phone ran out of charge early on & if you'd paid me a hundred dollars I wouldn't have been able to go charge it #I know this is a regular occurrence for some ppl ofc (much love if that's you <3) but I'm not at all used to this so it's a bit scary #it's late. I want to go to sleep. I've been missing out on sleep all week #but I'm literally up worrying that I'll have another messed up nightmare & it'll start off another one of these things ugh #probably gonna delete this in the morning but for now would happily take advice <3

[eddiemunsn]

wish i was snuggling in bed with eddie after getting home from the hospital, all of his booboos patched up with bandaids, stitches, and smooches for good measure. he deserves a fat blunt and millions of kisses and to watch his favorite movies with his favorite people while eating his favorite foods. he should be alive and healing, safe from all the danger and so very loved. dead or not, he will always be my hero, my big-hearted lovely little scrungly nerdy metal head pretty boy

#i miss him #not me typing this while wearing an eddie tshirt #with two eddie bracelets on and an eddie phone charm #girl get your shit together #i just miss him so much and it hurts like can this stop now please ?? #my eyes are stinging so fucking bad because i need to cry but i have no tears left #it’s moments like these where my neurodivergency really starts to show up and it sucks #just adds a little cherry on top of hyperfixating on a character #like you put too much salt in your stew #anyways i’m gonna try and find a way to distract myself now i guess #stranger things 4 #stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #stranger things 4 spoilers #st4 spoilers

[cheswirls]

hhhhhhhhhhhh saboace royalty au. ace was crown prince but can’t use magic which is necessary to become king, so he renounces his title and becomes infamous for his eccentric tendencies to play up the illusion that he’s truly not meant for the throne and that his younger sibling has full rights to the title of heir.

sabo is born to a family serving in the royal court, has been a genius magician since he was a child, and is the perfect example of a young man fully educated to serve at the king’s side. which is why he’s allowed himself to be tied down into a loveless political engagement with the king’s heir, putting the whims of his family before his own and resigning himself to become the future ruler’s consort/spouse to legitimize his role as an advisory right-hand man.

but then the heir grows rebellious and denounces the engagement with sabo in public and ace swoops in to save the day (and sabo’s reputation), demanding his father give sabo to him instead. he steals sabo away and challenges his sibling’s right to the throne, intent on earning back the title not for himself, but so he can make sabo (who is heavily qualified to rule) the king - and since they’ll be wed, no one will be able to undermine sabo’s position as he will technically be part of the monarchy that governs the kingdom.

#op #i…aaaaaaaaaaaa iykyk but if you dont small tangent story time #i asked friends for magical show recs w unique magic concepts bc i decided to set the #toxic codependent forever-bond in a fantasy au so i can make it be a set of self-inflicted curses #the only free time i have is walking to and from work so ive been scribbling notes on my phone #thinking of what type of magic system to have for this one was becoming a distraction #esp since the focus rly isn’t on magic itself and only on aspects of the bond that show how unhealthy it is #instead of obsessing over it more i decided to have someone decide for me #flash forward one of them brings up using the fantasy yuri anime that came out early this year #then proceeds to give me the rundown of all seven published light novels until i cave and watch the pilot episode #its SO good i actually watched 2 and love anis and euphie and will definitely be reading the LN over winter break #also completely snapped me away from the au bc i am so in love w this now #went in to ep 1 with misconstrusions and fell halfway thru screaming this is so saboace core and i have a halfbaked plot at the ready #thinking smth smth sabo visits the palace to get acquainted w/ fiancee and makes fast friends w/ ace #then they realize they have legit feelings for each other and the whole thing was gonna be a play #on the steals-partner-from-sibling trope that i jus loosely dreamed up bc algard reminded me of sabo and then i couldnt not think of them #but then i finished the ep and went OH it went down like that!!!! thats brutal. and then i changed it #and then i watched ep 2 and changed it further based on glossed-over advanced plot knowledge #bc the solution to algard feeling pressure from a title he never wanted and anis rejecting it in the first place #is obv (in this very yuri-centric fantasy novel) to make euphie queen instead and legitimize it by her marrying anis #and then i hyper projected that onto saboace bc i love them so #yessa after letting me ramble abt this so i could resist the urge to furiously jot down notes: i think val made you worse actually #(shes not wrong also val responding w ‘lmao wlw wins again’ and nothing else had me in stitches #best/worst influence it is 5am and i have done nothing for my studio class yet am having the time of my life) #curse of the average hobbyist writer to always have good ideas when there is no time no breathe life into them #writing

[cloud-somersault]

constellations chapter 3 is SO GOOD idk what the fuck happened there, but go OFF!!!

#i know everyone's in chapter 4 land but 3 is SOO GOOD #bro the stone forest alone....HELP #ugh it was so hard writing wukong's rage form but HOLY SHIT!! reading it after is so hype #do u ever just sit in a pavilion as the rain gently falls...with your ex-husband and mentee....and it's quiet and peaceful but #there's a strong turbulence going on deep inside you :3 #the way wukong always dusts MK off and wipes his tears away and makes sure he's clean faced and ready to go #speaks to how much wukong cares about vanity #i mean he also is expressing comfort and compassion but. he also cares about appearances a lot #but anyway -- do you also ever have a conversation with your ex-husband through eye contact alone? #i think they've done that four times in this fic... #mk the entire journey: every day i get a little more homophobic #HE'S SO TIRED!!!! #MK after talking to wukong and macaque at the inn: yeah haha! i seriously wanna go home now! 🙃 #MK on the phone: DADSY /PLEASE/ COME PICK ME UP!!!! #macaque seeing Wukong's eyes for the first time and actually stopping everything that he was doing #and just looking at wukong and being like “haha...heeyyy what the fuck?? did they do to you??” chef's kiss #wukong and macaque just talking while macaque captures that random man's shadow...please #as they reminisce about how things used to be...how easily they talk to each other when they're not guided by hate #that's the thing it's how easily they fall into step with one another #that's shadowpeach. they'll be off balance or one will be running and the other walking. they'll get distracted or whatever. but #they'll always fall back into step with one another #and that's why they've got to walk with each other. step by step...so they can stop being afraid 😌

[fictionadventurer]

I've got a couple of days left in September when I want to squeeze in some time to finish a couple of books I was reading this month, and Inklings Challenge starts in a couple of days, so of course this was the perfect time to get obsessed with Victober and download a bunch of obscure Victorian books.

#i was in waiting-around situations today where youtube was a justifiable distraction #and unfortunately fell down a rabbit hole #i actually climbed out and threw together an october reading list i was pleased with #a couple of new things but also some things i was planning on reading anyway #some things to continue #some that need to go back to the library soon #almost all very short #i was stupidly proud of myself for coming up with a way to fill all five victober prompts with three books #including two i was planning to read anyway #but then i fell down the rabbit hole again #and downloaded a few more books #see the dangerous thing is that they're all free online #you can pick up books on a whim #and i have so very many whims #the idea is to have them available for future but be aware i likely won't read most of these #but of course now i'm excited for all of them #i need to put down the phone and go to bed and clear my head #but in good news i got the inklings teams posts formatted #i work the next two eves so i had to get it done now #and it's a good thing i was on the ball #because i always forget just how complicated that process is #everything in triplicate #this year all the software worked well thank goodness #no trouble with lost names or lopsided teams #it's just that there's a lot of sections of three different posts to pull together #so it's always more work than i'd expect #i'll still add names if people jump in btw #i just need to have the vast bulk of the work done in advamce

[icewindandboringhorror]

I love all of these goofy product photos where the water bottle is extremely obviously just photoshopped onto a stock image of someone pretending to hold something or whatever.. very convincing..

#the last one where the water bottle is like nearly the size of the woman's entire leg ghbjbjhh #ALSO I know.. gross.. nasty.. amazon.. I was only looking there because I was trying to find an exact replica of an old water bottle #I bought like 6 years ago in a store and I just wanted another one of those and it seemed like the only place the old manufacturer #still sold was through amazon but.. alas.. I think they just don't make them anymore. so I have abandoned my hunt #I didn't actually buy anything. but I did get distracted clicking through product images for a few of them #it's bizarre how like............... idk.. WHY is this done??? Isn't this offputting to basically ANY potential customer?? or do people #not look at every photo/read the entire page/all product information before buying?? #all of these are from like front page ''top sellers'' or whatever like........... how does this not hurt the brand???? #If the company can't even bother to take a single photo of a real life person using their real life product then... that to me #is kind of red flaggy..?? even if you're an indie start up small business with hardly any funds.. still #A real photo of the product you are selling in a real actual non-photo shopped environment does not seem that inacessible #Maybe it's because everyone does everything on phones now?? So it's harder to see the pictures when they're smaller? #Kind of the same thing with ai art and also hair color photoshops lol.. On my full comptuer screen it is SOOO easy to spot ai art #like IMMEDIATELy from the little tells and ways certain details morph into each other etc. I dont even mean obvious dalle mini stuff but #like the Fancy High Quality Photorealistic AI art is still pretty blatant 98% of the time if you know what to look for. But I still catch #people sharing it a lot like 'omg where can I buy this pair of shoes!! :O <3' .. erm you cannot.. that is the most balatantly fake looking #pair of shoes I have seen in my life hhjbj.. the heels are both different heights. there's a different number of straps on each one. etc. #AND that phase back before colored hair was Mainstream and people would post photos like 'omg going to bring this to the salon!! dream hair #and it's like.. you can LITERALLY see the parts where it's 'colored outside of the lines' and is so clearly just a person with blond hair #that someone drew over with a tint brush or something not even very neatly. etc. etc. ANYWAY.. Maybe with phones it's harder to tell these #things?? To me so much of it is instantly recognizable and it's suprising to me that people either don't notice or don't care and will #interact with it anyway by buying the product or acting like some ai art fake furniture is real or etc. etc. ..hewwoo #Aslo sidenote - I think I've become soo cynical and tired of constantly being advertised to that I literally cannot shop without getting #exhausted. I do not see how marketing is anything but obnoxious and transparent. Every item description having stuff like ''Our company is #commited to bringing you the highest quality water products! we set out with a mission to bring high quality products to people all over #the world and we believe in spreading health and happiness and'' just like SHUT THE HELL UP!! youre a fucking company #you don't ''beleive'' in anything you are here to sell a product. stop trying to talk like you're my bff who cares deeply about my health #or something just tell me the materials and product specifications of your stupid fucking water bottle and move on. Idont need to hear your #whole bullshit spiel about what ~your company stands for~ that is SO much MORE offputting. you make me want to buy the item LESS.. #longing for the type of ads from my 1800s magazines that are just like 'this product is good. please buy it. okay thank you much. bye'

[pedro-pascal]

idk if it’s because i know what happens already but i rewatched the 1st episode of TLOU with a friend who knows nothing about it and he was so confused by everything he kept asking questions and clarifications so maybe the series isn’t as well made as i thought it was? 

#i WILL say that this specific friend was 1) #tired 2) he easily gets distracted so i'm sure he looked at this phone while watching the ep #3) he is not a patient guy. he wants to know everything right now and he doesn't like to wait #so maybe it's him but maybe the show IS confusing to some point #my friend was like: is that boy pedro? daughter? lmao #he also was not sure that sarah was dead and he thought she survived #he also might not have been in the right mood to watch it which i get too. i never want to be forced to watch something #hopefully he will like episode 2

[running-in-the-dark]

I'm not feeling well today, so I'm in bed, and it's so fucking boring. I wish I at least had my Switch but of course this happens to be the day my husband took it to work with him to download some of my games for me (since we don't have internet yet) 😭

#I'm listening to an audiobook but I'm just not good at lying still and not DOING anything #so I've mostly been looking at rainbow high dolls (when the images are nice enough to load...) & deciding which ones I might buy next month #so far I've been good and haven't impulse bought any but I know it's a really stupid idea anyway #but what else is there to do 😭 #I shouldn't have had that takeout yesterday.... it was fucking delicious but my stomach hates me now #wish I could at least scroll through tumblr but no the phone signal is far too bad for that in my room #I really really hope we'll have internet soon 🙃 it's fine when you're keeping busy but I just can't always do that #being sick and not having a distraction sucks so much #personal

[blackfire493]

I feel like I just need someone I trust will be chill to just. sit next to me and tell me to do my work. the procrastination issue is not getting any better

#sometimes I wish my family was better because then I can actually talk to them about my issues without getting in trouble #I wish I could bother my friends to help out but they have their own stuff going on #anyway. gonna (hopefully) stop procrastinating and (hopefully) get some work done #gonna use my phone to write a paper because my computer is too distracting #(even though it'll be annoying as fuck to write on my phone) #then I have research... and more papers #the procrastination has indeed reached a point that I now have 8 papers to write over the next 2 days #wish me luck (none of them will take too long but it's not fun)

[theythemmer]

for some reason using socials on my ipad is like. easier than on my phone. big screen make me regulate emotions before exploding ? why am i a literal toddler

#maybe bc it’s easier to control the obsessive checking #like ok u can sus socials like twice a day and then just . put it away #phone makes me too accessible and that’s turned into me using it as an emotional crutch #i miss when id have like. phone free weeks and id shut my phone in my bathroom drawer for a week #but also i had the physical capacity to still be on my yoga/gym kick so i was sufficiently distracted #now i can’t even sleep more than 3 hours at a time #sigh #tired of being tired #sick of being sick #blabble