#i have feelings all over the place

[wardingshout]

Travelling for Day 4 of SpeSilverWeek! going to Mt. Silver to visit "the extended family"...

#I might just have completely forgotten but we never properly got to see mr silver in the manga right?? a Tragedy it's my fav place #spesilverweek #pokespe #pokespe silver #pokemon #sneasel #my art #I only meant to do that second drawing but then I was feeling the art comfort so much I wanted more... #I wish they looked nicer together as a set but oh well #I might not have time for Day 5 now but I'll see dsfhkud #also everyone's been writing such nice tags the past days and I'm going all ;; over it thank you;;;; like so so much;;;;;;;; #I'm so excited to be back at it hell yeah !!!!

[hayden-christensen]

hayden christensen coming back to star wars has been the absolute highlight of the past two years and it has been a pleasure and joy to watch him in two shows both with little screentime but incredible performances of every version of anakin skywalker/darth vader and get his well deserved flowers from the fandom…hayden IS and ALWAYS WILL BE anakin and no one else could have done it thank you thank you thank you

#star wars #anakin skywalker #darth vader #hayden christensen #kenobi #ahsoka #ahsoka s1 #ahsoka spoilers #sw cast #emotions are all over the place rn 😭😭😭 #it feels like the end of a chapter that started in 2020 😭😭😭 #(made this on my phone for twitter I have a gifset version of this post that looks so much better agshdhdh) #*text

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

you want a new kind of guy, fine, i raise you: the lady i was briefly roommates with in college who once smoked a blunt at a party and then spent an hour confessing earnestly to me that she genuinely preferred reading detailed episode recaps over actually watching the tv show in question

#she sounded so remorseful & i just stood staring like an anthropologist watching their phd thesis spontaneously manifest before their eyes #apparently she would watch the pilot episode to get a feel for the characters #and then just read a bunch of recaps & episode reviews instead of watching future episodes. what fresh steaming hell #this conversation took place like a year and a half after we were roommates btw. i had seen her maybe twice in that time period #i thought she was a standard frat girl but then 18 months later she appears in the wild grass to reveal unhinged character background to me #and i'm just standing there nodding feeling like i missed a weird opportunity i did not want or ask for #honestly thought i was the weirdest person in that apartment situation but now i'm wondering what our other 2 roommates were hiding #not my strangest college experience at ALL but like. definitely top 20 #this wasn't the same person as Aquarium Girl btw but oddly enough they were roommates actually #(not at the same time that Recaps Lady and i were roommates but at different intervals idk) #anyway i probably should have interviewed at more than one apartment before taking over a sublease but summer sess is a weird time u know #oh and this happened in Hong Kong btw

[transmascissues]

today, my coworkers’ refusal to see me as a man put one of our patients in a position where they felt unsafe for the third time. i’ve been at this job for less than two months total. i don’t even care about getting misgendered anymore, i just want the people we’re supposed to be taking care of to feel comfortable around me.

i work at a hospital where we have to supervise our patients in a lot of vulnerable situations. there are safeguarding rules in place for certain things that male employees aren’t allowed to be present for when it comes to female patients. and yet, the people training me and telling me what to do have repeatedly put me in situations where i’ve been forced to do things that the female patients aren’t comfortable with me doing. and because they have repeatedly failed to teach me the rules for doing my job as a man, i have no way of knowing when i’m crossing one of those lines unless one of the patients tells me.

i’ve had to watch a victim of SA stare at me in abject terror as my coworkers asked her to strip naked with me still in the room. it took several minutes for her to even be able to speak enough to ask if i could leave the room. i found out after that she broke down crying the moment i walked out. my biggest regret is that i didn’t realize what was happening fast enough to leave before she ever had to say something, because she shouldn’t have had to say it. i never should’ve been allowed in the room in the first place, because that’s not something male employees are supposed to be present for. but i didn’t know that yet, because i was training and i thought surely, they wouldn’t train me to do something that directly violated their own safeguarding rules. that moment was the first time, and it’s haunted me ever since, but it wasn’t the last time. not only did it happen for the third time today — it almost happened for the fourth, and would have if someone hadn’t spoken up to say they should pick someone else. i care for these people so deeply, it’s why i took this job, and i’m so tired of hearing the fear in their voices when they have to ask me not to do something i never should’ve been told to do.

i’m very used to the personal discomfort of being misgendered. i willingly deal with it a lot at work as well as in other situations, not because i’m in the closet (at this point in my medical transition that would be impossible), but because it’s such a frequent occurrence with my coworkers that we would never get anything done if i took the time to correct them every time. but to see it get to the point of causing such visceral discomfort in other people? people i’m supposed to be taking care of and keeping safe? that’s something else entirely, and i’m fucking exhausted.

and after all of that, some of them still look at me like i have two heads when they tell me what to do and i say “i can’t do that, only female employees can” because i’m learning now. clearly i’m already seen as a man by our patients, but my coworkers would still rather put them in an unsafe situation than just train me as a man.

#to be clear it’s four different things they’ve asked me to do that im not supposed to #as soon as i find out about one rule they ask me to violate a different one that i didn’t know about #i will never ever forget that girl’s face and i’ll never stop being angry for her #for all three of them but especially her #i hate my coworkers for a million different reasons #the patients are the only reason i didn’t quit this job after the first day #i just want to do right by them and sometimes it feels like i’m the only one working there who does #it kills me because the patients who know im trans have been so great about it too #most of them know nothing about trans people but they’re so willing to learn and so respectful and we’ve had such great conversations #they’re getting fucked over by someone else’s transphobia when they themselves don’t have a single transphobic bone in their bodies #i hate this place because i care about the people in it too much to stand by the way it treats them and it’s killing me #transandrophobia #transandromisia #transmisandry #virilmisia #virilphobia #anti transmasculinity #transmascphobia

[uncanny-tranny]

Whenever people who are entrenched in diet culture talk about how terrible chemicals are, I just want to whip out this:

#diet culture #diet culture tw #described images #image description in alt #'it's got CHEMICALS in it' and so do you! and me too! IT'S ALL CHEMICALS ALL THE WAY DOWN #instead of running from this world we must learn to embrace it #i'm not particularly angry at people who say this because it makes me think that they're incredibly invested in diet culture... #...i just don't want the whole 'food = bad' or 'bodies = bad' to go unchallenged... #...part of the reason why diet culture seems just as prevalent now (if not moreso) is partially because it isn't really... #...challenged or questioned without provocation. it's just assumed to be correct because it makes you 'feel in control' #when chemicals are bad you can control what chemicals you consume. it's individualistic and places the blame onto you for 'being good' #it places responsibility onto the person in such a way that it becomes impossible to fulfill #it isn't that i'm upset that people want to treat their bodies in a way they think is responsible... #...moreso that the *way* they go about it ensures that they're stuck in a cycle of self-blame and even self-hatred #because the METHOD is ineffective. not the desire to treat your body well #also the state of ohio looks stupid and i do Not respect it #it looks like a ball that is simultaneously deflated and over-inflated #also their state flag looks silly to me #it looks like the person who was making it fell asleep making it #i'm just clowning on ohio at this point. have never been to ohio but. are you guys okay

[greywoe]

"The she-wolf laid into the squires with a tourney sword, scattering them all. The crannogman was bruised and bloodied, so she took him back to her lair to clean his cuts and bind them up with linen."

#asoiaf #asoiaf fanart #lyanna stark #howland reed #my drawings #i wonder how many times i've reread that chapter with meera's story lol #i like this moment esp it's so sweet #and clearly made an impact on howland as he followed ned into the war later.. all the way to the tower #ohhhh you know what now i want a howland and jon interaction. i want them to meet. oh man #asos #anyway i've been in a bit of a slump lately so this isn't great but eh. i've got a few backlogged as well i might upload..sometime #it was super foggy today to the point of not seeing anything which was very cool so i guess that motivated me to finish this #i like weird weather but it should have snowed damn it. there's almost always snow on my birthday so this feels like an ominous sign #also there are odd places in my neighbourhood where tons of crows and rooks and jackdaws gather for whatever reason and i see them on walks #and i always go hmm looks like a feast for crows over there. heh

[hotpotghosts]

#chilaios #I wanted to post this with more succubus chil doodles but I haven’t had time to do more so #I just think it’d be neat if the succubus turning into chilchuck was laios’ chilaios feelings realization #I wanna write it but we’ll see if I get to it so for now have a sketch #my art style for these guys is all over the place we’ll see where I end up lmao #ghostmakestuff #dungeon meshi spoilers #maybe a little???? if the existence of succubus is a spoiler idk??

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Smell Check [Easy: Failure]

MDZS Disco Elysium AU part 1 (part 2 - part 3)

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #disco elysium #MDZS Disco Elysium AU #So sad I didn't manage to get this comic out on the 15th (pd-mdzs's 8 month anniversary and DE's 4th year anniversary) but I'm here *now* #I have a very extensive and detailed MDZS Disco Elysium AU that I am Not Normal About. #I've seen a few other people point out the potential in a crossover (true) but they make the mistake in having it be set in 51! #A true crossover would take place closer to The Antecentennial Revolution! #Disco Elysium did not go that hard on its cool lore for people to only make surface level crossovers!!! #One day I'll write the fic or post my notes. I don't know who would read it but it tickles *my* brain and that's enough. #No spoilers for DE (here or in comments (please)) but please consider....Magpie Wei Wuxian B*) On his way to be an innocent. #I do think there is a good chance a chunk of the MDZS readership would enjoy DE but...it's also not a game I easily recommend #It's more of an experience you have to marinate over. It's dark in ways that are off putting to some people. #It makes you feel like a very bad person all the time. It gets extremely personal if you allow yourself to be honest in your answers #and it's also the game that saved my life. My life was truly forever changed after playing disco elysium. #If I recommend it to people it's a badge of the trust I have in you to appreciate something dear to me B'*) #If you decide to play: PLEASE go in as blind as possible. You will regret spoiling yourself. #edit: this is based on real disco elysium dialogue. HDB has many canon kinks but this is not one of them

[pineappical]

in light of tedtrent becoming so real, im also jumping on the tedtrent epilogue 😊

there's just no way ted wouldn't keep in touch with the others (and have weekly zoom meetings just like in the christmas special) and I just love the thought of the whole team having reunions once in a while.

and going back to trent's arc in s3, the sunflowers conversation, "And your daughter?" "She's never been happier." I think it could go the same for ted.. we've never really properly saw how henry felt about his dad being in london, it's always other people that told ted his son misses him, who's to say henry would rather see his dad happy because that in turn would make him happy too? he was there to win the whole thing, right? I just know ted’s story isn’t done yet when he still hasn’t learned to let others take care of him in return and who else to pair him with than the man who blew up his career because a man was nice to him (and also because they were so. so cruel for the fakeout tedbecca scenes for that finale) 🥺

I'm no writer so just pretend these are snapshots of a slow burn fic where ted visits london for their team reunion and slowly realizes that trent has a crush on him and they kiss about it 💛

#ted lasso #trent crimm #tedependent #ted lasso fanart #tedtrent #ted x trent #I HAVE SOOOOOO MUCH MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS BTW its just that its 4am rn and i cannot type down my thoughts for the life of me </3 #im just so not over that ending and how weird it felt for ted to end his story like that.. not like he can turn back to michelle since #dr. jacob is right there.. i want this man to feel loved and cared for and actually have a place he knows he can call home and that was #richmond for me.. to the family we were born with. and to the family we make along the way etc etc etc #ted lasso spoilers #<- FORGOT ABOUT THAT. #i can finally say i loved the ending for all the callbacks and stuff but I NEED THIS MAN TO BE HELDDDD!!!!! *everything explodes around me* #he even went back there WITHOUT BEARD :( his bestfriend for sooo long who was there for all their ups and downs. i dont like beard and jane #being together but the fact ted didnt even go to their wedding too like ...??! what is going onnnn #also graying lasso is just something so indulgent for me . hush #pn.art #JUST YKNOW!!! I HOPE YALL UNDERSTAND WHAT IM SAYING ITS REALLY REALLY LATE I PROBABLY SHOULDVE WAITED TILL LATER TO POST THIS BUT JAHJVAKDG #my memory is really bad too so i could also be misremembering scenes and im too eepy to check the scenes i had in mind so u_u #ALSO apologies that its taking me sooo long to draw things i recently joined a mc server and ive been playing it all day and night HFSJGFSH #im sooo scared of making these type of posts because i dont have the balls to make the wrong choices in other people's eyes but GRAAH!!!!! #<- i love tedtrent bUT WHAT IF PEOPLE THINK IM CRINGGGEEEE!!!!! #THATS ALL.... i have more drawings in mind that ill get around to later.. for now goodnight <3

[x-gon-give-it]

Headcanon, theory, prediction, whatever you want to call it,

but I think the reason that the universe Miquel hijacked collapsed, and not Miles, despite them both being “anomalies” is because Miquel was trying to change someone else’s story, as opposed to Miles who inspires other people to change their own stories.

Like, Miquel tried to force himself into a universe that wasn’t his. He took the place of his counterpart and pretended to be him, he was playing a part that wasn’t meant for him, he was changing a story that wasn’t his. And the universe rejected that.

Whereas Miles inspires people to change their own stories. His universe didn’t collapse because that’s HIS universe. It’s HIS story to tell, and sure the plot changed along the way, but he’s still telling it.

The same with 42-Miles. His story was drastically changed because he wasn’t bitten by that spider, but his universe isn’t collapsing because he’s the one still telling the story. He’s still shaping his own future.

And like how Miles inspired Peter B to have Mayday at all. Without Miles, Peter wouldn’t have gone back to his and he wouldn’t have had Mayday. But his universe isn’t collapsing because that’s a decision PETER made. No one forced him to make up with MJ and have Mayday. But Miles gave him faith and inspired him to go back and give life another try. (Don’t even get me started how Peter would have literally DIED if not for Miles. He was going to stay in Miles dimension. He was fully ready to deteriorate. He literally would have died if not for Miles saying “NO BITCH YOU GOTTA GO HOME” much less inspiring him to have Mayday, I’m just saying I’m just saying.)

And the thing is I don’t think Miquel realizes that. He’s so caught up in his grief and anger that he’s completely consumed with following canon and my never disrupting ANYTHING. He doesn’t realize that that universe collapsed because he tried to change someone ELSES story. He tried to become someone else to live their story. He didn’t try to make his own and that’s not how it works.

Idk just thinking thots tonight, And ATSV is always at the top of my brain

#i May just being delusional and rambling #but idk #it makes sense to me #im excited to see how the third movie ends #the conclusión #I WANT ANSWERS DAMMIT #gimme gimme gimme #also I think we collectively brushed over the fact real quick that Peter would have literally DIED if not for Miles #like i jusr think about that sometimes #Peter was in such a low place that he was okay with sacrificing himself in Miles’ universe #sacrificing himself to an INCREDIBLY painful death #but Miles saved him and inspired him to keep living and now he has a beautiful daughter and a beautiful wife #and he couldn’t have a better life if he tried #all thanks to that amazing kid who made him feel alive again #im deep in the feels tonight fam #i don’t know what else to say #peter parker #spider-man #miles Morales #miguel o'hara #Spider-Man 2099 #ATSV #ITSV #atsv spoilers

[stuckinapril]

the neurologist i shadow is so funny bc she has a valley girl accent and yet she's the smartest person in the room. this woman was casually doing case consenus ab a man w frontotemporal dementia in the highest girliest voice imaginable. i want to be her i think

#case consensus is basically where several neurologists/doctors meet to decide what the patient's case actually is #im genuinely not sure why this medical center does it this way but they write down data on paper THEN input it into the digital system #which i have qualms w bc i feel like it wastes so much time #but literally my whole role at this internship is inputting this data into the system so i should probably be grateful they do it this way #but in that one meeting everyone was all over the place so this at the ending of the meeting this woman goes #“that... was frantic.” #in the most valley girl accent known to man #and ever since ive integrated this as my response to everything #youre right. that WAS frantic #she also was like “sorry im unfocused. need lunch rly bad” at one point during the meeting #this neurologist is just like the rest of us fr

[ehghtyseven]

All my life I wore #68... [x]

#still having feelings #his face when jags gives him the head pat though #and he looks so relieved when jags says yes #like he was worried he might actually say no #bless him #<333 #just imagining him back in the locker room afterwards #sitting in a corner somewhere with sid like #all breathless and hearteyes all over the place #'I talked to him and he was really nice and he said he would sign my jersey and did you see? did you see? he gave me a headpat!' #anyway... #mine:gif #mine:tanger #gif:t #tanger #jagr #penguins #practice #jagr’s homecoming

[luck-of-the-drawings]

"And soda; runs off into the street..." "...and soda... is totally okay!"

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #cw blood #something something cracking open a boy w the cold ones #IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES I MISSED I SWWWEAR TO JEBEDIAH. IF I STARE AT THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA DIE IT NEEDS TO BE DONE #ALSO RRRAAAHAHHHGHGH CAN I JUST TAKEA SECOND TO SCREEAAMM ABT HOW MUCH I LOVE SODA AND EMIZEL.. LIKE THERYE SO CUTE.... #THEY ARE HOMIES THAT KISS EACHOTHR GOODNIGHT. THEY CARE SO MUCH FOR EACHOTHER. SODA LOVES SODA AND SODA LOVES YOU #do u guys remember how willing he was to share blood w his vampire bestie. like cmon. remember when emizel memorized sodas Soda Schedule. #LIKE CMON.... they just have eachothers backs so much. ouhhh my god... ANYWAY SO THE ART HUH. I FEEL LIKE I SCRAMBLED W IT FOR A WHILE #DRAWIN IS HARD..... i think i did well in the end tho.. i like the lil heart beat effects. and i hope i made soda look Suffieciently Scared #i ALSO had fun w the teeth. i however did not have fun w the walls. if i had more drugs i mightve done every brick in more detail #but i didnt WANNA!!!! this will suffice.I HOPE IT FLOWS WELL&THAT ITS CLEAR... IVE STARED AT IT SO LONG IT IS NOW VISUAL SOUP. HELP!!! #i want my comics to have more Pauses and Space and Thought and Momence. i feel like normally they go so fast. but THIS time #i think i did good.... huuoouhhhh.... comics are HARD art is HARD but i am HARDER. or something. OH YEAH I HAVE MORE ART THINGS #soda was RLY HARD FOR ME TO DRAW FOR A MINUTE..but i like where his design is now. i wanted his hair to be curly swirly.like soda fizz #i THINK thats all my thoughts for now. if u have thoughts u should spill them in the tags i looooove reading tttaaggsss #have a goodnight i gotta go to work soon. maybe. unless the casinos power goes out AGAIN. OR SEOMTHING... UUGHHH MY SCHEDULE IS IN SHAMBLES #I THOUGHT I WAS WORKIN 3 DAYS INA ROW SO I RENTED A WHOLE DAMN HOTEL BC THE JOB PLACE IS FAR AWAY.. I HAD TO CANCEL THE WHOLE RESERVATOn #annd im MMMMAD ABOUT IT!!! like ill get over it ofc BUT IM PEEVED!!!! IM INCONVIENIENCED AND GENTLY AGGRIVATED. BUT OVERALL FINE. #hope yalls weekend goes well. sleep well. if u get the chance to.

[stellorc]

what a recently employed amnesiac sith scout and a depressed exile ship mechanic have in common?

I made this a while ago and forgot to share here, my bad. Left is my girl Revan and right is my baby Exile, or Jesra and Phebe if you're feeling fancy.

#yeah I'm back at my bust portrait era sue me #it's just so comforting painting them like this #my art is all over the place rn and it feels Weird but I'm also having fun??? #screaming is still part of the process of but there's Joy somewhere around #ty for being here I luv you all #my art #kotor #revan #jedi exile #jesra kast #phebe aastra

[pepperpixel]

“put me on a pedestal and i’ll only disappoint you

tell me i’m exceptional, and i promise to exploit you

gimme all your money, and i’ll make some origami honey!

i think you’re a joke!!! …but i don’t find you very

fuuuuuuu~nyyy”

More tagr art!!! Assorted stuff this time! Featuring some cute chibi stuff. Some solo gaz’s, a lil uhhh. Comic of an altercation.. and a very belated Halloween pic I started drawing last Halloween and didnt finish lol. Also featuring lyrics from pedestrian at best cuz that song rllly rlly fits my ver of tak lol.

#invader zim #gaz membrane #invader tak #tagr #iz tak #iz gaz #tak #doodles #there toxic yuri!!! they’re all over the place!!! tak is tsundere insane alien who fueled by revenge it’s gonna be rough! #I think. there relationship would slowly grow and develop as gaz is helping tak w all her injuries #but I think they’d end up having a true true falling out sometime after take fully healed and gets her ship back. #and they’d be split up for a few years maybe? idk how long I’d want it to be. but! yeah. #absence makes the heart grow fonder and makes u realize how fucking stupid u are #and eventually they’d reunite and shit would be better lol #I don’t want them to be at each others throats forever that’d suck lol #theyre just definitely are moments where there at each others throats in the beginning #but they r also moments.. where they both feel true belonging and acceptance. like they never have before… and it blows there lil minds… #I also dO want gaz to go into space at some point w tak cuz that’d be fucking awesome #after they reunite again they can go explore the universe a bit #these r all very half baked ideas btw and also my brains mush cuz ive been drawing all day #so please excuse if said ideas suck. also please excuse all the typos lol #I might change my mind on the them separating idk… or maybe make it a shorter amount of time… idk!! I havent thought thru all this shit lol #it’s not like I’m gonna write a story or actually make a comic I’m just drawing random fanart #I don’t need to have all these thoughts all solidified lol

[lightninginapuddle]

Stede discovering the Red (Cursed) Suit in The Curse of The Seafaring Life - Our Flag Means Death

#ofmd #our flag means death #stede bonnet #have been gifing this episode lately and man do I love Stede this episode #he's just feeling himself all over the place and I love that for him #my gifs #ofmd edits #save ofmd #adopt our crew #queue as a crew #ofmd gifs