#i have waited a whole year to do this for touka and now it’s here and so is the final chapter | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

petri808 · 3 years

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Neither Lucy nor Natsu sat through the closing arguments, but according to Gajeel the defense stood firmly on their case for insanity. Touka’s attorney argued that his client suffered from a disorder that should put her in a hospital for treatment, not a jail cell, and not only that, but the so-called victims in the case drove her to do what she did. It was a very risky move to blame the victims. Of course, the prosecution countered that not only did Touka not suffer from any condition but that this was a simple case of jealousy gone wrong. Natsu and Lucy were innocent victims of a selfish woman who tried to kill them. Period, and for that she should go to prison for the maximum sentence allowed.

The prosecutor implored to the jurors heartstrings. “You saw the effects that Ms. Shiromajyo caused to her victims. The tears shed on the stand and the genuine fear in Ms. Heartfilia’s testimony as she recounted the events in question. Ladies and gentlemen, this young woman stared death in the face and watched her boyfriend almost get killed by the defendant. They had to fight to survive! Ms. Heartfilia and Mr. Dragneel have experienced something that no one should ever go through.” He gestured at the timeline board facing them. “Ms. Shiromajyo stalked multiple people over the course of several years to reach her goal, intimidating people that really had nothing to do with her. Ms. Shiromajyo paid a person to kill Ms. Strauss, threatening and intimidating her. And most of all, ultimately took this whole situation into her own hands when all of her efforts didn’t work out. She is a danger to society. I urge you, the jury to give her victims the peace of mind that she’ll be off the streets in a cell getting the treatment that she needs, and the punishment she deserves.”

It was a nerve wracking time for the victims as they waited outside of the court room for the jury to deliberate. Lucy and Natsu stayed in a side room with the prosecutor along with their closest friends and family there to support them. The prosecutor assured them that they’d done their best and the odds were in their favor. But of course, it only took one hold out to cause a mistrial, and Lucy didn’t know if she could go through this again. She was already unhappy that even if convicted, Japan’s sentencing structures were not as stringent as other countries.

The jury deliberated for four hours before reaching a verdict pronouncing Touka guilty of all charges. Upon hearing the guilty decision, Lucy and Natsu slipped back into the court room to hear the final disposition.

“Rise Ms. Shiromajyo.” The judge then read the decision to the standing defendant. “You have been found guilty by this court of two counts of attempted murder that caused injury. One count of kidnapping for profit. And three counts of intimidation. Do you have any last statement to make to the court before I render sentencing?”

Touka hung her head as if resigned to her fate. “Yes...” Surprisingly, to all those in the courtroom, she apologized for her actions. “I see now how much pain I caused to everyone because I couldn’t control myself and I hope one day they’ll forgive me for it.”

But her words of contrition were too little, too late. The judge sentenced Touka to the maximum of the highest offense, which was 15 years with work, but instead of the work condition, imposed a special circumstance that Touka be ordered to undergo mandatory psychological treatment while in custody and to adhere to any treatments and medications prescribed for her own good.

“Ms. Shiromajyo,” the judge spoke directly to the woman. “You’ve apologized at the end, but I hope you truly feel that way. Based on all of the evidence presented in court, your actions were clearly towards a one-sided love affair with a man who wanted nothing to do with you, and for that you tried to punish an innocent woman who got in your way. I do not believe, and the jury agreed, that you do not suffer from a legal defense of mental defect, however you should spend the time in prison to get your mind right again, so that when you re-enter society in the future, you’ll no longer suffer from whatever emotional problems brought you here in the first place. You are very lucky that I cannot under the law sentence you to concurrent sentences for every single charge. Bailiff, take custody of the prisoner. This case is adjourned.”

As the final gavel bang echoed in the court room, Natsu and Lucy who’d made it in time to hear it all, broke down in tears and elation as the court room erupted in cheers around them. A rarity for the poised population. This case was certainly anything but common for Japan, especially because the perpetrator was a woman and journalists had kept the public up to date with its progress. A lot of people were affected by this case personally, but the fear of what Touka had done rang cold for onlookers too. For the public, the idea that someone you may know could harbor ill will and do something this heinous was a scary proposition.

While the case was now over, Lucy knew her own struggles with anxiety were not, despite the tiny relief she’d felt in hearing the words guilty. She’d made it through the trial by sheer determination, but the experience had set her back in her progress. Reliving all the worst events and being grilled by the defense had re-traumatized her. Not all the way regressed, but the nightmares were back anew, starting immediately after her recall testimony.

It wasn’t just the old memories that haunted Lucy, but a new, troubling thought brought out during that testimony. When the defense attorney tried to make her think she was just as bad as Touka, there was a point when she thought... was it true? And the more she pondered, the worst the correlation became despite her loved ones conviction that she was nothing like the woman. Because... why not? If Touka’s deluded mind really believed she was protecting what was hers, well isn’t that the same logic Lucy used to defend herself and Natsu? Then there was the rage she’d felt. Was the attorney, right? If Natsu hadn’t stopped her from beating the woman, would she have killed Touka? Did that mean she had a killer instinct too?

All the publicity surrounding the trial didn’t help one bit. Just trying to get out of the court room after the verdict had been a complete circus of cameras flashing and microphones being shoved in the couples faces wanting their opinions of the verdict. Oh, how Lucy wanted to scream in their faces! How do they think they’d feel?! Yes, it felt great to be vindicated, but 15 years for almost killing them? Where were their assurances that when Touka was released, she wouldn’t pick right back up where she’d left off and hunt them down?

All these irrational thoughts fueling the new regression were different from before. Lucy didn’t feel as anxious. She was a little depressed, but now she was also— angry.

When she arrived at her therapy session without Natsu, Lucy sat on the couch facing the woman with her arms crossed. The therapist was quick to note the way in which she was holding her poise because it wasn’t a comforting arm cross, but a firm one. The muscles in her forearms were tense along with the tight lipped and brows furrowed expression gracing Lucy’s face.

“Well, this is certainly new,” the woman put her notebook down as she spoke. “Something has changed, shall we talk about it?”

Lucy’s hands clenched firmly as her eyes look away slightly. “I had a small argument with Natsu this morning.”

“I get the impression it wasn’t small.”

“Okay! It was a big fight! Happy?!” Lucy’s arms unfurled and gesticulated. “I don’t even know why it got out of hand, but it did.”

“Tell me what happened and let’s figure it out together.”

“Tch,” Lucy crossed her arms again and looked away. “I woke up from a nightmare. He started comforting me like he al—ways does, and I told him to stop. But he didn’t.”

“Why’d you tell him to stop?”

“I don’t know... I was just, irritated.”

“With him?”

“Yes... No— both, I don’t fucking know! Just pissed off, okay?! I was just angry and didn’t wanna be bothered!”

“I see... and how did Natsu react?”

“He, well, um,” Lucy’s shoulders dropped a bit. “He just said okay, I’ll give you space if you want it and left the bedroom. And we haven’t spoken since then.”

“It sounds like Natsu respected your wishes to back off. But why is that making you so angry?”

The therapists question brought instant tears pooling in Lucy’s eyes. She knew why, but she didn’t know why, and holding it in was tearing her apart. But she also didn’t know how to articulate all of the random thoughts plaguing her in a way that made sense. So, at that moment she just broke. Through fitful sobs the cacophony of broken, fragmented thoughts spewed out in no logical manner. Lucy just spoke every word and sentence that came to mind as the therapist sat quietly listening.

This was her first session since the trial had ended, so all of the wounds were painfully fresh. Shouldn’t she be happy it was over? They were free for now and it was time to move forward but all she could think about were the things the attorney had said. And that made her angry with herself. Lucy’s always thought she was so much stronger, yet this experience or rather the effects left her feeling lost and broken, and weak. Even more infuriating for her, she knew these thoughts were completely irrational! It’s one thing to not understand, it’s another to know how stupid it sounded and not be able to fight back against it. Weak. That’s what it made her feel. Stupid and weak for losing herself. They may have won against Touka, but Touka had taken something away and Lucy feared she’d lost it forever.

Who she was.

The therapist moved over to the couch and hugged tightly to a sobbing Lucy, stroking her hair and cradling her head. Comforting in silence allowed the blonde to just cry, as hard as she needed to and release everything that had been held inside where it shouldn’t stay. When the tears slowed, and Lucy’s breathing had the normalized, the therapist spoke softly.

“You’re not broken, Lucy, and you’re not dumb. You’re rightfully in pain after everything you’ve experienced, and that’s okay too.”

“How is that okay?” Lucy sniffled. “It shouldn’t be okay!”

“It’s not fair what you had to endure but being upset and feeling pain because of it means you’re human. Even the anger is a good feeling right now.”

Lucy snorts an annoyed laugh at such a ridiculous sounding statement. Anger being, okay?!

“There are positives we can take from this.”

Again, Lucy huffs. “Yeah, right. That makes a lot of sense.”

The therapist pulls back and settles into a more professional pose to continue. “Your anger means you care. Think about it, if you didn’t care, you wouldn’t get angry, right?”

“I guess...”

“In all these months, this is the first time I am seeing a deep passion coming from you. Lucy you aren’t really lost, and this anger are those feelings screaming ‘I’m still here!’ You can use that same energy to push forward.”

“But what about Natsu?” Lucy’s eyes cloud up. “I think I really made him mad a-and I don’t want to lose him.”

“Did he come with you today?”

“Yeah, he’s in the waiting room.” Lucy mumbled through a frown. “But I think he just came cause he felt obligated.”

The therapists eyes softened along with her tone. “I have a feeling that’s not the case. He might feel hurt and confused right now, but I’m sure he still loves you deeply. Maybe we should bring him in here and talk things over? That way I can help you through it.”

Lucy paused for a moment before nodding weakly. “I’d like that.”

The therapist brought Natsu into the room and as soon as he saw the puffy red eyes and Lucy’s disheveled appearance immediately stumbled over and hugged onto her with tears of his own flowing down, apologizing over and over for upsetting her that morning.

Although Lucy stiffened up at first when he’d hugged her in fear of what he might say, his words instead stunned her. All along she’d felt the fight was her fault, not his. She’d been the bitch to him and now his pain brought her tears back along with a loss of her anger. “It’s not your fault,” she hugged him back. “I was angry with myself and took it out on you. That wasn’t fair.”

“But I shouldn’t have walked away like I did.”

“No,” Lucy exhaled, “you did the right thing. I... I needed something to wake me up.”

Natsu pulled back in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Lucy smiled weakly. “Coming here mad, I couldn’t hide it so she made me talk about it. Now I see how that needed that to happen and I feel a lot better because of it. I was just worried you’d hate me for the way I acted.”

“I could never hate you,” Natsu smiled and cupped Lucy’s cheeks. “I told you, you’re stuck with me.”

By that point, the therapist had gone back to her own chair and with the session almost over for that day, addressed the couple together. “Lucy right now I think you are at a very good point in your progress. Your anxiety had gotten better, the depression is still there, but it’s not as debilitating as it was before, so now it’s time to take the next step in the healing process. You’d mentioned wanting going back to school and the next semester starts in a month. Perhaps it’s time to consider going back?”

“I-I don’t know if I could handle full time...”

“Maybe reach out to the school and see if they’ll work with you on a modified schedule?”

“I guess I could...”

“And I’ll help you,” Natsu added on as he squeezed Lucy’s hand. “They’ve been really supportive so far.”

Lucy let out a long exhale. “Okay. I’ll give it a shot.”

“I’ve got another suggestion too,” Natsu added. “If you get angry, you could take it out with a physical sport or something.”

“That’s actually a good outlet,” the therapist agreed. “Is there anything you’re interested in?”

“Um...” Lucy thought about for a couple minutes. “I thought about taking self-defense classes.”

“That would be cool! Maybe we can go together?”

“I’d really, really like that.” And first time in a long time, Lucy truly meant it.

#nalu #nalu au #nalu fan fic #nalu fan fiction #Natsu dragneel #Lucy heartfilia #Natsu x lucy #stangers on a train #ch 31

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shiny-procrastinates · 3 years

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(re)Watching Magia Record S1 - part 13

part 12 here

Hello and welcome everyone to the last post in this series. Most people probably would watch this ep right after the other one and there's much to be written, so let's skip the recap and get right to it.

Puella Magi Madoka Magica Side Story: Magia Record S1 episode 13

This show in a nutshell.

Really though, poor Iroha. She only came to this town to look for her sister and now she's learnt a cruel secret and is being urged to join a cult. Talk about someone who must have no idea what's going on anymore.

Back in reality, Yachiyo has finally caught up. She tries to stop Mifuyu from showing them the truth, but I'd say it's too late now. Also, Mifuyu's sure being a jerk today. You don't get to blame Yachiyo for letting them come when you're the one who made sure this would happen!

Yachiyo gets upset, and Mifuyu disappears. Iroha wakes up with Yachiyo cleaning her Soul Gem and Yachiyo says this but, nah Yachiyo, they'd have to learn this sooner or later and you don't seem like you'd ever tell them.

Iroha and Yachiyo start making their way out of Memory Museum. Tsuruno and the others were with Iroha when they went down but now they're nowhere to be found. Wait, does that mean we don't get to see their reactions to learning the truth? What a let down.

On this topic, Iroha's also pretty calm despite everything, which is probably part because realization hasn't settled in yet, part because she's occupied worrying about her team... but maybe also in part because Iroha has a wish she can’t regret, so she just doesn't care about the price as much as others. Doesn't she look like this kind of character? "I don't care what price I have to pay if that means I'll save them"-like.

Oh.

Hey Yachiyo 1: that was really outta nowhere; 2: that's not very nice of you, jumping ship just as things have hit rock-bottom. What the hell

Iroha, of course, is as shocked as we are (we are?). Sure Yachiyo had been acting strange since yesterday but this is a bit much. You can't just decide this on your own when 3/5 of the team is MiA

Iroha follows after Yachiyo, pressing her for an explanation, but Yachiyo refuses to give one.

Iroha's understandably upset at Yachiyo's attitude and asserts she refuses to leave Yachiyo's side if she won't give her a convincing reason to. And really, she has all the reasons to lose her cool here: one of her best friends is leading a cult, she's destined to a fate worse than death, half her team is missing and now the last one wants out for absolutely no discernible reason besides because she wants to. Even a saint has their limits.

Also, like, Mikazuki Team is like family to her, Yachiyo can't just decide to destroy her home with no explanation like this

Hearing what Iroha said, maybe Yachiyo realized she wouldn't get Iroha off her tail without saying anything, so she reveals her reason for wanting to disband the team. Yachiyo says that her wish was to survive. However, the way it worked was that she sacrificed others for her own survival. So she thinks Iroha and co. will die if they stay with her.

Even hearing this, Iroha's not convinced. Could such a wish really exist?

So yeah, Yachiyo was having a little crisis there and ended up being eaten by the Rumor(?). Thankfully, Iroha could still see her signal on the Soul Gem GPS, so the girl firms her determination to save her.

While Iroha's doing that, Yachiyo's having a lecture by herself to herself inside the Rumor. Quite the novel way to do introspection, if I do say so myself.

Here, we learn that Yachiyo originally wished to survive in the modelling world (we're never directly told that she's a model but there's lots of visual cues to it throughout the series). She did it because she thought she had to be a strong leader to protect her companions. She didn't want to survive at their expanse; so, uhhh...

She isn't then. Wishes in this series come true in the exact way the Magical Girl wants it to, so Yachiyo's wish can't be killing anyone if that's not what she wanted. She's misunderstanding.

...I wish they'd have put Kanae and Mel's last words in the actual scene they belong to rather than just a still, since they're literally one of the main reasons Yachiyo even reached the conclusion that their deaths were caused by her.

Iroha has learned "hold B to charge".

So, yeah, Iroha must've had a training arc off-screen because even though she's only been shown sucking at battles the whole series, she's now suddenly strong enough to defeat a Rumor on her own. Or maybe she just wanted to save her wife Yachiyo that much.

Iroha defeats the Rumor of Memory Museum (the place's an actual building, if a weird one, so that stays), hugs Yachiyo and is about to literally drag her by the hand to go search for the others, but Yachiyo's still reluctant. Iroha then tells her that Yachiyo and the others are the one who made her this strong, so she'll prove to her that her wish isn't what she thinks it is.

Don't jinx yourself, idiot! Thank god you've got protagonist plot armor.

Now, if only years of survivor's guilt could be cured this easily in real life too.

Yachiyo finally calls Iroha by her first name, accepting Iroha's promise.

The museum starts falling apart, probably thanks to the damage it received when Iroha was fighting the Rumor, so Iroha and Yachiyo have no choice but to leave the place now, even though they haven't found the others yet.

Iroha barely dodges some debris, stumbling, so Yachiyo carries her instead. Iroha's Soul Gem has been drained from fighting the Rumor, so she's having a hard time moving already. Doppels may be a thing, but there's no guarantee that they're safe, so Yachiyo's call of going to the Coordinator's to get a Grief Seed is probably correct.

As Iroha's situation worsens, Yachiyo follows Chibi Kyuubei until almost the entrance. Then, she meets with someone we know very well.

Mami says something about a gospel, and Yachiyo asserts that she and Iroha have no intention of joining the cult.

Which makes Mami snap. This girl is clearly not on her right mind. In fact, one could say she lost her head (ba-dum-tss).

Mami and Yachiyo start fighting, and I guess as expected of a veteran of 7 years, we have to commend Yachiyo here on meeting Mami's blows while carrying Iroha on her back. Yachiyo pleads with Mami to hear them out but Touka, the brat who was just watching the battle, tells Mami she doesn't have to, and Mami just keeps on her offensive.

Of course, there's only so much Yachiyo could do handicapped. But today is not the day Yachiyo's getting a bullet to her head, because

A certain someone who really likes impromptu hydrant smoke bombs is here.

Sayaka! Nice save, shining cape hero of justice! You have no idea who exactly you're calling weak tho

Seeing Sayaka, it looked like Mami had went back to normal for a moment, but nope, she's still borked. Like in all timelines where she learns it, seems like Mami didn't take the truth well here either. The difference is that she can't witch out in Kamihama so something happened instead.

Mami keeps monologuing, with Sayaka of course not understanding a single thing she's saying. Then, Mami starts to doppel out. The girl has seriously lost her mind and is now obsessed with salvation. (and man 10/10 on the VA’s voice acting here)

And here comes the bullet hell! This is so overkill Mami

Sayaka and Yachiyo do their best to deflect the rain of bullets, with Yachiyo turning back and trying to compete in number of spears. Jesus, just how big exactly is the amount of magic a veteran magical girl has? This is insane!

Yachiyo tries to send a stream of spears, who are deflected with one Tiro Finale, with another one headed their way right after

Sayaka blocks the Tiro Finale with her sword. The shot is so powerful one of her arms is torn off AND SHE ATTACHES IT BACK MID-AIR

holy-moly!

Hope this museum has insurance.

Sayaka just barely manages to reflect that bomb, which saves them from being blown to smithereens. Touka was having a nice tea time watching the spectacle, but then realizes she had something else to attend to so she exits, leaving the stage to Mami, who resumes her bullet hell.

Sayaka uses Yachiyo's spears as a platform to get closer and attempts to grab Mami, to no avail. She falls down and tries to take cover, but Mami's bullets are now homing bullets apparently, because they just change direction and start raining in her direction again.

Down below where Yachiyo's hiding, Iroha manages to wake back up, but she looks, like, on the verge of dying or something. Iroha tells Yachiyo they have to help Sayaka and Yachiyo rebukes there's no way they could win, to which Iroha subtly implies she wants to use her doppel, assuring Yachiyo it'll be okay and raising yet another flag.

Mami finally corners Sayaka, but before Sayaka can become blue Swiss cheese, Iroha comes in with her doppel to cover her. Very convenient that she suddenly knows how to control it.

Aaand Yachiyo can do that too, because of course she does, why wouldn't she. (/sarcasm)

But, uhhh, hers is considerably more creepy, what with the extra arms and stuff. Yikes.

Yachiyo says that doppels are dangerous, but one has to wonder when and how did she even learn about them. After all, she did seem surprised when Iroha did not turn into a witch in Seance Shrine.

While that's going on Touka's just out here deciding by herself that Mami would want to die for the sake of salvation. Just, uh, I don't think you can judge that when she's gone nuts, and you're a jerk if you put her in that scenario expecting her to die. Not that anyone had any doubts you're a jerk, mind you.

Also, what does she mean with Mami helping with developing Rumors?

"hey Kyuubei, I don't want to be meguka anymore, can I retire?"

Even using their doppels, Iroha and Yachiyo are not managing to make even a dent in Holy Mami. Iroha ends up getting bashed into a wall, the doppel taking over for real and her becoming a sitting duck for Mami, but Yachiyo yeets Mami before she can shoot. I'm sure this wasn't supposed to be funny but there's just something hilarious to me about Yachiyo just yeeting Holy Mami and her bouncing away.

Yachiyo transforms and shakes Iroha back to reality.

Again, why the heck do you know this, Yachiyo.

Iroha raises yet another flag for herself. What next? Are you going to say you want to marry her when you two go back?

Somewhere else, Touka arrives on her appointment: a speech for the cult. And oh my hell just look at how many magical girls there is! The amount of Black Feathers always blows me away, since the impression I got from og and even the spin offs is that, sure, there are some groups of magical girls around like the Holy Quintet and the Pleiades, but I still though it was more of a rare thing. It's shocking to see THIS many in the same place. (...I suppose the game needed the cannon fodder :x)

HEY what are these two doing here?!

Touka continues her speech over Iroha and Yachiyo's battle.

This cult leader here continues her discourse, preaching about how the power to wish for something is what advanced civilization, so magical girls, who have the power to make a wish reality, are better than normal humans, and so are deserving of being released from their fate.

OH NO, TSURUNO HAS GONE WEIRD TOO

*bonk*

There goes Holy Mami down the collapsing museum.

It's not like Touka's completely wrong (except for saying that magical girls are superior), but if it wasn't clear enough already, their actual actions makes her speech be full of hypocrisy.

Back at the crumbling Memory Museum, Iroha has managed to jinx herself so hard throughout this episode she pierced her own protagonist plot armor. Great job!

Try as she might, Yachiyo just cannot pull her back up, which also makes no sense when you consider how strong magical girls are, but alas.

And to make things worse, Mami is also pulling a literal "you're going down with me", so Iroha, making a split second decision, pulls her hand away from Yachiyo's grasp, lest both of them fall and get buried... breaking the one promise she made probably not even a hour ago.

I think that last thing she said was "sorry", but don't quote me on that.

What a loyal Mokyu. Never mind that if they can turn into water they probably can't die from this.

Yachiyo's about to follow her fate too, but thankfully Sayaka comes in for the save, only giving a brief glance to where Mami disappeared before getting the heck out of there.

Well, people promise lots of things, Yachiyo.

OH I KNOW YOU, what was your name again? It's been so long I forgot.

Back at the The Wings of the Magius' HQ, Touka's done with her speech. The way the anime cuts from Yachiyo falling to the depths of despair to the cult clapping is just *chef's kiss*

Oh no Felicia and Sana also joined the cult :(

EXCUSE ME, WHAT

oh frick we'll have to deal with that too!? Aren't things already effed up enough as is!?

...being meguka is suffering.

Also the song playing over this last sequence, Nigredo, is a real banger. Momentarily filling in that hole Kalafina left in our hearts.

After the end credits there's the teaser for season 2, with lots of overlapping lines and blink-and-you-miss-it frames hinting at the things that'll happen. I'd have to screenshot basically the whole sequence to get everything and season 2 is coming out like, today, so I'm not even gonna bother.

- x -

Aaand that's it folks! Puella Magia Madoka Magica Side Story: Magia Record Season 1! (still a mouthful)

I cannot express just how hyped I was by the end of this episode back when it aired. Did you get fired up watching it too? I was so into it back then I just couldn't stop theorizing for like, over a month, so eventually the curiosity was just too much and I caved in and watched the game.

On that matter, ironically, despite me loving the game story to bits, this is the ONE episode that makes me wish I didn't go and watch the game. Why? Because I liked this episode well enough before, but now I just can't get over how stupidly better the resolution to Yachiyo's arc was done in the game. I get runtime constraints and all, but it's almost an offense to her character having her believe in Iroha right away just because Iroha said she wouldn't die. Aaaaghh what the heck, I don't know how they could have done this better with the time on the episode but this wasn't it. I'll be eternally salty we got robbed of the full extent of alpha Iroha, too.

So yeah, I do apologize if this post sounded more salty and sarcastic than usual.

One thing I realized re-watching this though is that the reason this episode is so awkward with that character part is exactly because they halfheartedly tried to stick to the game. Yachiyo bringing back her "it's none of your account" and Iroha defeating the Rumor on her own were part of the game, but because they hadn't kept those character traits throughout the anime it falls flat here, because anime Yachiyo didn't use that almost as a catchphrase, and anime Iroha is never shown to be competent enough to take on a Rumor on her own (the opposite, in fact), so those come out of nowhere. Even last episode, Yachiyo 180ing because of what Mifuyu said comes out of the blue in the anime, because we're missing the context that she actually went back to behaving like she used to when she first disbanded her team, and anime Yachiyo didn't have the hold-up with the word "friends", at least not as clearly. On the other hand, Yachiyo being willing to accept Iroha's words right away does fit in with anime Yachiyo, who was always more soft than game version, but here it becomes awkward because they had had her acting like her game counterpart since last episode and then suddenly she snaps back to the anime self again.

What I'm trying to say here is that they should've changed this scene even more to fit the actual characters anime Iroha and Yachiyo are, rather than halfheartedly trying to force it to go the same way as in the game. That's what I think.

Besides that, Tsuruno and co.'s reaction to the truth was cut out, but I'm sure we'll get around to seeing that next season. Holy Mami's fight is cool but... I dunno. Except Sayaka reflecting that Tiro Finale, it felt really uninspired. It could've been shorter if that meant giving more time to the story, imo

Now for things I REALLY like in this episode, there's the whole sequence with Touka's speech. You might've even guessed this considering I said the dream sequence way back in episode 1 is my favorite ever. IT'S JUST SO GOOD. The constrast between Touka delivering this super charismatic discourse about magical girls, the saint of her cause being lunatic and their actions being just the opposite of the noble cause she says they're preaching is marvelous. They even manage to use this time to reveal that KaMoRe and Tsuruno and co. are on the cult. Really, really well done.

This ending tho. Iroha disappearing is the biggest anime original thing to happen besides Kuroe, so that's got me curious to see what they'll do with this. I love the game, so I have complicated feelings about the anime diverging from it, but I can't deny it's exciting to think about what they'll change up. Ultimately, it's more likely that they're just rearranging some stuff to make the progress more straightforward, but it'd be really cool if it went full anime original too. Just I'm not sure on the odds for that.

I'm sure they'll keep us on the suspense until the very last moment possible but I'm sure Iroha's not actually dead. Looking at a meta sense, there's no way they'd kill a main character off-screen. Storywise, it'd be hard to move Ui's mystery forward without the one person who remembers her and they're not just going to drop this plot, and also for Iroha to be dead Holy Mami would also need to be dead and we can't have that because they haven't even went into what's wrong with her yet. So yeah. I'll believe it when I see it. Would it be absolutely crazy if they did? Yeah, but it ain't gonna happen. (please don't make me have to bite my tongue show)

Whew, this post is long af. I didn't plan for this. I don't feel like writing a season impression because all of s1 was mostly set up for what's to come, so I can't say if it was good or bad until the series is over. Originally, I'd planned to put up another post with my theories for s2, but considering that comes out today I'm not sure there's even a point to doing it anymore lol

In any case, I hope I could provide you some fun with these posts! Being honest, the reason I decided to write this was because I've always liked to hear people's opinions on the shows I like, but I don't really have people to watch things with me, so I just read reddit and stuff. Doing that, when I was watching Symphogear s1 some years back, I stumbled across these posts of someone watching it for the first time and had a blast reading those as I watched. So I wanted to provide someone with that experience too. I'll never reach the comedic genius that person had, but I can at least keep you company while you watch :)

...these are also super useful to check back on the order of events too :v

So yeah, writing these was fun, though there were lots of parts where I really went out of ideas of what to say; it forced me to actually sit down and rewatch (or else I'd procrastinate) and made me pick up on a lot of things. That's a plus in my book.

Now that we are done with this, I hope you are as excited for season 2 as I am! I'm not sure if I'll keep writing about it here, so yeah. Whether we ever meet again or not, remember:

Don't ever make a contract with a white weasel.

#Magia Record #magireco #pmmm magia record #puella magi madoka magica side story #this post is super late #it's 7 in the morning #and I haven't slept help

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animezing-fandoms · 4 years

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Clarity

Masterlist

Warnings: Making out.

Relationships: Nalu with background Gruvia

Summary: After defeating Aldoron, Natsu notices Gray confess his love for Juvia in private, and it makes him think about where his own relationship with Lucy stands. So they have a little chat while she’s healing his wounds.

A/N: So, by now you all know that I ship both nalu and gruvia, which is why I think that after having a gruvia moment in the manga, for some reason I got struck with the inspiration for a nalu fic that relates to the aftermath of what sort of relationship stuff will hopefully be in the new chapter this week for gruvia. I don’t really know exactly how this idea slipped into my subconscious, but it got in there somehow and I think it’s really good and I hope you all like it!

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Natsu thought he knew what to expect when they had defeated Aldoron. The whole guild was there and they were all happy and drunkenly celebrating, despite Wendy’s wishes for everyone to take it easy while she healed them. And like usual Juvia was all over Gray and he looked very displeased about it. She was going on an on about how Gray said she was his “power to live” and he snickered, surprised that ice princess would really say something like that. He was about to go tease him about it but then Gray took Juvia’s hand and led her away from the make-shift camp the guild had made.

Gray led her down a hill and Natsu noticed that a few of the nosier guild members had followed, peering down at the valley they were in to see what was going on. Natsu was curious too. So he followed them as best he could with his limp from the blow he had gotten on his knee and looked over the hill with his guild mates.

When he got there all he saw was Gray holding Juvia’s hands, and he missed the first part of the conversation because he was late to the watch party, but with his dragon slayer hearing he could clearly pick up Gray saying the words “I want you to be mine. You’re everything to me Juvia. I love you” before he pressed his lips against hers and then the watch party gave themselves away with their loud wolf-whistles and cheers and caused Gray to whip his head around to look at them in anger before shouting “what the hell does it take to get some privacy around here dammit!” and using his magic to make a wall of ice to block the onlookers view of him and Juvia.

Natsu was confused by everyone’s excitement. He hadn’t fully understood what he just saw but by listening to everyone else he was able to piece it together.

“Well it’s about damn time he told her how he feels!” Macao said.

“Yeah you don’t want to keep a beautiful girl like that waiting!” Wakaba said. “Especially one that’s been in love with you for as long as she has. Man if that isn’t true love then I don’t know what is.”

Natsu was still confused until a drunken Cana slung her arm around his shoulders and made everything quite clear.

“Now how long are you planning on making Lucy wait Natsu.” Cana slurred.

“Wait? Wait for what?” He asked.

“To confess to her like Gray just did to Juvia dummy.” Cana laughed. “Lucy wouldn’t admit it but it was pretty clear she was worried when we all thought Touka was into you before we found out that she was an exceed that was in love with Happy.”

Natsu was still confused but then the last thing Cana said to him is what got the message through.

“I mean damn Juvia waited for Gray for a long time without giving up but who knows how long Lucy’s gonna wait to hear it from you.”

It was in that moment that Natsu’s heart seized in fear that waiting until after the quest to tell Lucy how he really felt about her might not have been the smartest move.

-------------

Even now, when he was alone with Lucy in a tent while she treated his injuries he was worried about what he should do. Should he follow Gray’s example and tell Lucy how he really felt about her? Or did she not really like him and Cana was just teasing him like she does with all of the guild members when she’s drunk.

And the fact that Lucy seemed visibly worried too as she pulled out his leg to apply bandages to his injured knee, definitely wasn’t helping ease his anxiety. But it did switch his anxiety from being focused on himself to being focused on what’s troubling her.

“What’s wrong Luce? It seems like something’s bothering you.” Natsu asks.

Lucy sighs.

“You need to be more careful.” Lucy says as she wraps a bandage around Natsu’s leg.

Natsu winces as the medicine that was on the bandages touches the wound on his leg. He grabs Lucy’s hand as a reflex to get her to stop dressing his wound and she gasps and blushes from the contact.

Truth be told, Natsu was surprised that Lucy had offered to care for him rather than let Wendy heal him. She said it was because Wendy was busy tending to the others wounds which was true but he knew her well enough at this point to know that there was another reason why she was putting that damn stinging lotion on his wounds.

“You don’t need to be so worried about me Luce.” He tells her with sincerity in his voice, and in his eyes but she can’t see that because she’s staring at the wound on his leg, deep in thought. “It’s just a few injuries. I’ve had worse.”

Natsu’s smile falls when he sees Lucy wince. What he had said must not have reassured her like he thought it would. In fact it looks like he might have just made things worse.

“I know and that’s what worries me! You always just go charging into danger, not caring if you’ll get hurt or not!” Lucy says.

“Yeah, I don’t care if I get a little beat up during a fight as long as I win it. I don’t care what happens to me, as long as I’m protecting everyone else.” Natsu says.

“But I do care what happens to you!” Lucy yells at him.

She was crying now and Natsu’s heart was breaking at the sight. He hated it when Lucy was sad. And he hated it even more when he was the cause and he didn’t know what to do to fix it.

“You said that we’d be together forever! So why do you keep putting yourself in situations where I could lose you!” Lucy scolds him and pulls the last bandage on his leg tightly, making him wince from the sting.

He didn’t mind the pain that much though. The pain of her being so upset because of his actions was much worse.

“Okay! Okay! I’m sorry!” Natsu pleads to her. “I’ll try to be more careful in the future, so please don’t hurt me!”

“I’m gonna hold you to that.” Lucy says sternly after she sniffles and wipes the tears from her eyes as she reaches for his wounded arm and he holds it out for her.

Natsu looks at her apologetically while he tries to think of something more to say to her to make her feel better.

“I’m dead serious Lucy. I’ll try to be more careful. When I told you that we’d be together forever I meant it. I’ve got no plans to leave you or our friends any time soon. So I’ll try to be more careful if that makes you feel better. I had no idea you were worried about that too.” Natsu says which makes Lucy frown in confusion.

“Wait, what else do you think I’m worried about?” Lucy asks.

“Touka.” Natsu says.

Lucy feels the hairs on the back of her neck stand up as she starts to get an idea of where this was going.

“W-well I was worried because she turned our whole guild white but we separated the white wizard from her so it’s all taken care of. I’m not worried anymore.” Lucy explains, feeling relief wash over her.

For a moment there she was worried that he might have heard something crazy from-

“But Cana told me you were worried that Touka and I would date each other.” Natsu says.

“WHAT!?!” Lucy exclaims and Natsu couldn’t help but smirk.

Lucy looks so adorable sometimes when she’s embarrassed. But as she rambles about how Cana was lying and she had no idea where she got that crazy idea from, it became clear to him that she was hiding something. And his heart filled with hope that that something was what he thought it was. But he still wasn’t sure.

“I mean yeah I was relieved when I found out that she was an exceed that was in love with Happy instead of a human in love with you but that wasn’t because I was jealous or anything it’s because I was worried she was gonna get her heart broken because you’re not interested in that sort of thing!” She rambles and Natsu frowns at her.

“What sort of thing?” Natsu asks.

Lucy laughs and shakes her head.

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about. I felt sorry for Touka because I thought she wanted to be your boyfriend and throughout all of the years I’ve known you, you’ve made it pretty clear that you’re not interested in going out on dates or telling girls sweet things or even showing any interest in a woman at all. And I’m not mad at you or trying to insult you for not wanting a relationship or anything. That’s your choice and you don’t need to be interested in romance if you don’t want to be. I like you just the way you are. I was just worried for her because I thought she’d be disappointed when she learned you would never reciprocate her feelings.” Lucy explains before wrapping up his arm.

That disappointed tone in her voice when she said that last sentence said it all. He knew how she felt about him now. She just didn’t know that he felt the same. With Cana’s warning still echoing in his mind, he decided to end her worrying, by making it clear now how he felt about her.

“Well yeah.” Natsu scoffs. “Why the hell would I be interested in Touka when I’ve got you.”

Lucy freezes and drops the bandage roll as he finishes that sentence.

She looks up at him and sees him smiling at her with that goofy grin of his and gulps.

“W-what?” She asks and Natsu stops grinning and instead offers her a small smile with a look of sincerity and utter adoration for the woman at his side tending to his injuries.

With his dragon slayer hearing, he could hear her heart pounding. And he knew it was now or never.

“Lucy, you know that you’re the only one I want right?” Natsu asks her and Lucy gasps and her face turns bright red.

“W-want?” She flusterdly stammers. “Want me for what?”

Now it was Natsu’s turn to laugh and shake his head at Lucy’s confusion.

“You know.” Natsu tells her and takes her hand in his and holds it up between them as he laces his fingers through hers. “I’ve already told you that we’re going to be together forever. That means that for as long as we’re alive, I’m yours and you’re mine.”

Lucy felt her heart pounding as her heart filled with hope that Natsu was saying what she thought he was saying. But he had mislead her before, so this time she needed to be absolutely certain...

“Natsu I’m not quite sure what you mean.” Lucy apologizes.

Natsu frowns a bit in frustration before thinking of another way to explain it.

“The way that Gray feels about Juvia. I feel the same way about you Lucy. If Juvia is Gray’s power to live, then Lucy, you’re my power to fight.” Natsu says at Lucy lets out a soft gasp in shock. “I used to fight to become stronger to find Igneel. But then I met you and I started fighting for you instead. I’ve always been protective of our guild. They’re my family. I’ll always fight to protect them but most importantly, I’m fighting for you, to make this world safer for you so you can be happy and that nothing will ever make you cry again. I love you Lucy Heartfilia. And after seeing Gray and Juvia, I finally realize how I can show you how I feel about you.” Natsu says and Lucy gulps as his gaze shifts from her eyes to her lips. “That is, if you feel the same way?” Natsu asks shyly.

Lucy couldn’t help the huge grin that grew on her face from those words, as well as the tears of joy that were sliding down her cheeks.

“Of course I do you big dummy. I love you too.” Lucy says as Natsu wipes her tears away with his thumbs.

Natsu was smiling too until he saw her close her eyes and lean in closer to his face. So he carefully places his hand on her lower back, and his other hand on the back of her head and her breath hitches before he brings his mouth to hers and closes his eyes.

The kiss wasn’t much. It was the first one for both of them, unless you count what happened with Natsu and Happy. But even though right now, Natsu and Lucy were only pressing their lips together, when their lips finally parted, both of them were happier than they’ve been in a long time.

“Wow...so that’s what a kiss is?” Natsu asks and Lucy giggles.

“I guess so. I wouldn’t know if it’s supposed to be anything else because that was the only one I’ve ever had.” Lucy admits. “But I liked it. Did you?”

“Yeah!” Natsu exclaims with that childlike excitement that never failed to make Lucy laugh. “C-can we do it again?” He asks her with a mix of shyness and eagerness and that Lucy found so endearing there was no way she could say no, even though her answer was already a yes regardless.

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What had started out as just practice kissing had now turned into a practice make-out session. Lucy was seated in Natsu’s lap with her legs straddling him as she held his jaw in her hands and moved her mouth against his. Meanwhile, his hands were moving, mostly down her back but would sometimes move across her hip and down her thigh to move her leg to give him room to readjust how she was sitting on his lap to make the position more comfortable for him before he resumed kissing her.

Lucy was surprised by how much effort he was putting into this. For someone who’s never shown any interest in romance before, he was learning to read her signals and finding where she wanted to be touched by the little gasps that would leave her lips when his calloused fingers ran across a sensitive part of her skin and knowing which part of her body needed support when he readjusted himself so she wouldn’t fall over.

She was enjoying this. And she could feel that he was too. That’s why he had to readjust how she was sitting on his lap. A few thoughts ran through her head about taking this a bit further because of that. She was starting to feel a bit hot, and she thought about how good it would feel to have her bare skin against his if she took her top off. I mean, it’s not like he’d be seeing anything new at this point. She’d lost count of how many times he’d seen everything God had given her. But thank goodness she kept herself dressed because Happy came flying into the tent just as she was lifting her hand up to one of the buttons on her top.

“Hey Natsu I got you a fish to help make you feel better-AAAAAHHHH WHAT IN THE GOOD NAME OF FISH ARE YOU DOING!” Happy screams at the top of his lungs.

Natsu and Lucy scream together when Happy barges in, forgetting how accessible their tent was and that their other friends like Happy were also worried about Natsu’s condition and would probably be coming by to check on him.

And after hearing Happy scream like that, said friends threw the tent flap open, revealing Lucy sitting in Natsu’s lap with her hands on his upper chest while he had one hand on the back of her head and the other resting on her rear, and with both of their lips looking red and a bit puffy it was pretty obvious what the two of them were doing and after the initial gasp of shock and moment of silence as they tried to process the fact that Natsu of all people was making out with someone, they all cheer in congratulations for the couple, saying things like “well it’s about time!” and “I knew this quest would get them to confess!”, which was a pretty common one because it rhymed.

And people began to pass Jewels to each other which made Lucy upset because she didn’t like the fact that their guild mates were betting on her love life but it was hard to stay upset at them once she saw Makarov tearing up and sniffling at the front of the crowd.

“I knew Gray would get his act together and confess to Juvia at some point.” Makarov says as he wipes his tears on his sleeve. “But to think that you’ve finally matured enough to confess your feelings for Lucy too? I couldn’t be prouder of my children!” Makarov sniffles again and Lucy and Natsu rest their heads together while they both look at Makarov fondly. “Oh I never thought I’d live to see the day!” He exclaims.

“Hey! Give me some credit old man, I’m not as oblivious as that ice dick and everyone else thinks I am!” Natsu shouts back at him angrily, but then Lucy’s laughter calms him down and she lays her head against his chest and he rests his own on top of hers before gently kissing her forehead.

“This is so unfair!” Happy wails. “I’ve known about romance longer than Natsu has! How come this idiot manages to get a girl before I can?”

“Well if you wanna follow Natsu’s lead, it looks like if you want to get some action, all you’ve got to do is get yourself injured and then a girl that likes you will not only patch you up but feel you up too!” A drunk Cana teases.

“Hey I was not feeling him up!” Lucy argues.

“Whatever you say Lucy!” Cana laughs. “Either way I’m proud of you girl. And proud of you too Natsu. The two of you are really growing up.”

“I guess we are. And that was a great idea you had there for Happy too!” Natsu says and ignites his fist. “Here Happy, if you wanna get injured I’ll help you out!” Natsu growls, making Happy sweat.

“Ahhh! No don’t hurt me! I take back what I said about you being an idiot when it comes to women!” Happy rambles as he flies back out of the tent as fast as he can.

“Ouch.” Natsu groans and drops his fist while looking at the bandaged area on his arm.

“Hey be careful. You’ll be all healed up soon enough but for right now you need to save your strength and take it easy.” Lucy says.

“Okay. Whatever you say Lucy. I’ll take it easy for you when I can help it so you don’t have to worry so much.” Natsu says before leaning down to capture her lips.

Both of them were grinning into the kiss from the sound of cheers and wolf-whistles congratulating them from outside of the tent.

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A/N: So yeah I don’t know how I came up with the idea for this fic. But it just popped into my head and I thought it was really good so I decided I should share it with the rest of you! I hope you all thought it was as good as I thought it was in my head.

#nalu #gruvia #fairy tail #FT 100 years quest #ft 100 yq #fairy tail 100 years quest #natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia #gray fullbuster #Juvia Lockser #Cana Alberona #ft happy #Makarov Dreyar #macao conbolt #wakaba mine

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transsexualhamlet · 3 years

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the many sins of tokyo ghoul :re

or: 13 reasons why :re is fucking terrible not clickbait

Disclaimer: I think no matter how long this post gets I’m missing something, so let’s just outline the worst ones. And I mean to be transparent, the only reason I actually read :re was so I could make this post... (and bc i wanted to see the what, five panels of hide) Well, I couldn’t stand hating it without evidence beyond hearsay and General Vibes. But I knew it was gonna be bad, I knew it was going to ruin me jesus christ. Obviously I’m not hating on people that like it, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with genuinely enjoying it (I do genuinely enjoy parts of it, and by parts i mean chapters 1-50 with exceptions and 75) I think it’s wonderful if you can derive joy from it (lmao) but I can say that through my lens in life, there’s so much fucking wrong with this goddamn fucking piece of shit manga and I feel the need to yell about it because i am ✨autism✨ so let’s get going (this is r e a l l y long just a warning)

tl;dr Ishida stay in your fucking lane

1. Transphobia and Homophobia:

alright here we are first off with the big one and if I had to choose, one of Ishida’s greatest sins here. It’s quite unusual in mangas like these to have any sort of representation for such things in and of itself, and yeah of course that annoys me, but having no represntation at all is like so much better than getting actively harmful representation. Most manga that aren’t specifically about those things shy away from those topics, and it’s tiring but it’s normal. You wouldn’t want a mangaka to try to write about something like that without experience or informed opinions. So I say if you can’t write something correct, just don’t write something like that in at all. Ishida clearly,,, does not get this.

And it’s not just the case of Mutsuki, who, well, gets it bad enough, there are three full fucking trans characters Ishida made like, just to shit on.

Big Madame- god, made like that specifically to perpetuate the predatory trans woman trope jesus christ is Ishida friends with JK fuckface Rowling. Ah yes the ugly, human trafficking, predatory, pedophilic killer that tried to make their male child more feminine? Has a dick. Really? Could you be a single bit more transparent about your fucking agenda here? I really don’t have to say much here.

Kanae von Fuckwald- Technically Ishida says here that basically this bitch was just like??? Pretending to be a guy for years just to what?? I don’t even know?? Get together with Tsukiyama? Cause he’s fucking gay or something? I don’t even get it but like i read this post yesterday and that’s a whole ass thermian argument. It’s like “oh well this is fine because well this person’s not actually trans and therefore the representation thing doesn’t apply”... it’s useless. You created the character that way and you made it intentionally to for whatever way promote this idea that people would “pretend” to be a different gender and that eventually they’ll realize that it’s a “lie” and they never really wanted it. This is what you’re saying about the real people who are,,, actually trans? Jesus christ. Also thinking that a twink like that would be trans? God yeah trans guys can be feminine but buddy that’s clearly not what you’re going for here.

And of course, Mutsuki- There’s just... so much wrong here. I mean like. Before we even get into anything about his character and what they did to him let me just discuss his entire design. Buddy like if you had to choose one person in that show to be trans that’s the least likely one. Ah yes, the feminine one. With the androgynous haircut and the shy disposition and the physical weakness compared to the others. God that’s like, a fujoshi’s take on ao3 of what character should be trans. As much as yeah of course, trans guys can be feminine, they are in no way obligated to be such and you shouldn’t make them more so to be more “believably” so. Ask any actual trans person ever. A character like that is just perpetuating the notion of trans guys being inherently more feminine or trying to pretend to be otherwise.ThEn, of course, there’s the ridiculous sexualization, infantilization and fetishization of this character, going through a thousand plot hurdles to make him constantly stripped, put in girls clothing, chased by perverts, assaulted, ET FUCKING CETERA. Give him a fUCKING BREAK. Creating this character the way he’s portrayed in canon (including so called backstory of murdering parents because of sexual and physical abuse) is perpetuating a notion that someone would be a trans guy because of internalized misogyny and/or trauma instead of because they’re just... a guy. It’s just it’s just it’s just Really bad. Plus taking his character, demonizing him and making him like, supposedly love haise (which i Really hate for a thousand reasons, god that’s like, a parent and child type relationship they have there not romantic,,, god,,,) try to like fucking murder touka and stop seeing sense, and then just... return him to being infantalized. God. Jesus christ fucking goddamn it I love Mutsuki and he deserves better.

Oh yeah and then the homophobia, this one’s smaller because... most of the trans people are here to go “it’s gay... wait it’s not Really gay so it’s ok” but I would like to leave a small note here for all the gay characters who got thrown under the bus not just in re but in the original, like, you know, Nico and shit? I really do not know shit about Nico but all the things about Jason? God if I had a thing for one person that you shouldn’t try to portray as representation it’s Jason. IDK what’s up with him and Naki but god it wasn’t healthy. (i’d like to say here that i love naki and i think naki deserves the world but honey there are better heroes than yamori) Anyway yeah I think that’s also bullshit and Ishida should stay in his fucking lane. (or her i guess, i just feel like it’s probably a guy bc of just... so much sexism)

Ok, now that we have the big one out of the way-

2. The mishandling of portrayals of various mental illnesses:

I’m not an expert on this one like I can say about the gays TM but just like in general, the whole manga’s very messy and portrays a lot of gritty stuff, and Ishida clearly attempts to throw in some mental illness for fun, but god fUcking damn it they’re bad. I couldn’t really even give you examples bc it’s pretty widespread and i’m stupid, but it was really like trump throwing paper towels “and you get a demonization, and you get an infantalization, and you get a butchered character, and you get a fetishization-”

3. Ishida having no fucking clue how science works

This particular factoid led me to have a very hard time reading this manga because it went from being about like, yknow, torture and fights and crying and stuff to weird experimentation bullshit and mutated whatever and everyone’s a hybrid now I guess. When I heard this thing about the quinxes, I thought that made no sense, because I was like “yeah but wait,,, how tf does that work didn’t Ishida say earlier that kagune literally were fueled by human meat isn’t that like the entire point the ccg is against?” and then Ishida’s explanation of how they’re not just exactly like Kaneki is that “oh yeah well there’s like, metal around it, so it’s different.” OH YEAH OK THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE NOW, THANKS.

The thing is... there’s no way of actually regulating that. You couldn’t move a kagune unless it was attached to your cells, and if it’s attached man, it’s attached and it’s part of you. Also yelling “frame two” won’t like make it any bigger lmao, either you’re gonna have it based on theoretical science in this universe or you’re going to have a dumb supernatural magic pokemon fight deal. The whole thing makes no sense. The science issue isn’t just about this either, it’s also about how the entire thing basically undermines the point of the whole story. When you blur the lines between human and ghoul with little to no real rules or basis in real science, every rule kind of just becomes cheap plot convenience.

So the Quinxes can eat human food unless they use their kagune too much, alright, but Kaneki couldn’t eat human food before he’d even ever used his though the only difference between their bodies was this,,, theoretical metal thing?? And Haise... was never really covered, before he went black hair emo bastard and like vored Eto, did he eat human food like the rest of the CCG? He certainly cooked it. And the squad that lived with him wasn’t aware he was a ghoul until he pulled out the kagune. So I’d assume so, but then how could he have a kagune, how could he survive when his body still was like that?

Is it the RC suppressents? Then couldn’t he just have taken those and lived as a human the entire time? Is that all he fucking needed, is that the only difference between human and ghoul? It doesn’t make sense and the rules are bent so much they don’t function anymore. Ishida like write down your rules somewhere even if they’re bullshit, they shouldn’t contradict each other.

Damn man I’m not even going to go into the dumbass rules of the half humans or the special fast aging thing or the fucking,,, folded up cells deal,,, or the Imagination Kagune, or the fucking,,, Dragon, or the zombie ghoul apocalypse or the “whole new species made of just kagune” i don’t even have the time it is fucking ridiculous and I can’t even with it. Physics. Laws of physics. If not biology, at least follow physics Ishida??? Please???? And if you’re not you need to do that consistently??

4. character glow ups actually being character glow downs

(with the exception of nishiki, he baby now, and akira, i think her development was valid af)

God, this one gets me every time. Touka was cool. Touka was fucking badass, she had a complex character with many motivations and wants, and in the original having her eventually kind of soften bc of Kaneki is valid. But taking her and turning her into like literally nothing but Pretty Housewife Yearning For Husband At War? God, kill me. She’s a strong person. She can like Kaneki without the guy being her only character trait. Also uh, Touka and Kaneki being a couple was valid before this change, now I honestly can’t stomach it. Like they were the kind of “both bisexual” m/f couple that we stan. No longer I guess.

She’s the most egregious example, but I’d also like to point out Juuzou, not everything they changed about him is bad, honestly we fucking stan his knife legs, but he’s kind of like a rip off L now? You got rid of his ~unhinged~, we do not stan. I’m on the fence about him bc i think that kind of is a valid transition to adulthood and I guess he’s grown up, but again, why change his fucking hair color? What is the explanation for this?

Also Hinami. I mean, I don’t really care about her a lot in general, but it’s weird to see her as like an adult when Ayato emo boy looks like exactly the fucking same and they’re like,,, supposedly the same age.

There are definitely more I’m missing here. Honestly, Hide was valid. God him with his fucking burlap sack. With a fucking lenny face on it. I can’t with him. That’s so Hide. But there were some bad ones.

5. one hair color change was my limit, enough said

black white black and white black white more white god bitch get some variety

6. Showing me great new characters and then promptly ruining them

And you can tell this one’s about quinx squad, my favorite bastard children. God, I love them. They’re the only good things about Re other than Hide and Haise and like everything else, Ishida took them and went “what if i *guts*” god why. I love these kids with all my heart. Why. Why. Why did you do that to Mutsuki. Why as soon as Haise isn’t in the room they all get themselves tangled up with pedos. Why they gotta break up the squad. Why make all of them lose all the wholesomeness and lessons they learned from Haise. Why do you ruin them all with weird unreciprocated random crushes on each other when they’re like basically siblings. Why fuckinG KILL SHIRAZU HE IS THE APPOINTED CHIEF DUMBASS OF THE SQUAD WHY HIM. WHY. WITH SO LITTLE IMPACT. YOU COULD FUCKING MISS IT SO EASILY. THAT’S NOT RIGHT. AND KANEKI JUST FUCKING ABANDONS THEM BC HE HAS HIS MEMORIES AGAIN N O ? NO ACTUALLY NO.

7. the casual racism and sexism :)

i just :) can you stop having girls constantly bring themselves down for being female :) and making them be oversexualized, less full characters :) always in some way connected to a guy :) more weak and hurt more often :) my fucking god :) also yeah it’s way less prevalent but there were a few racist caricatures thrown in there for taste if you don’t know how to draw lips just don’t

8. Ishida being too much of a pissbaby for a real death scene

Basically: undermining the impact of “deaths” fom the first series while also randomly and badly killing off new characters. Oh that character that died in the original in a really cinematic way that made you cry and think about the meaning of life and how beautifully tragic this story was? Oh lol they’re not Actually dead. (x10) Doing that with Hide (at least in the manga, not the anime, god root A really did it with him but we’re not talking about that) was valid, seeing as I love him your honor and in the manga one of the lessons that his character hinges on was like in chapter 75 to live on instead of giving up even if it hurts and all that... (this is obviously kind of the opposite from root A where his character was like more about sacrificing for kaneki since kaneki had already done so much, i think both are valid but we’re Talking About The Manga) he was done well. That was right (even though i think they should have done More of it) but there were so many characters this kind of thing was done to without the proper adjustment in the handling of the messages given here.

Like with Koma and Irimi, who,,, honestly should have stayed dead because their entire character arc kinda ended there and showed how they were sorry for their actions and this was how they were making it up. And then they just like... come back. And fight more. Really? This wasn’t the only instance either, same deal with Shinohara (though him coming back made me cry) it like, kind of undermines it if you’re going to have Juuzou derive his character development from that. Either Juuzou gets to keep his unhinged and his dad, or he loses his dad for real and he also grows up. God guys choose. What’s the message you’re playing here. (at least they kept Yoshimura dead, his death made me cry and I would have stabbed something if it wasn’t real, probably Ishida.) And even with Kaneki himself, god, if he can’t die from being stabbed straight through the fucking eye, what COULD kill him? It really diminishes the anxiety you feel about “omg is this person gonna die i want them to be ok” if they basically evade the laws of physics and their own previous character arcs 70 times. I’m definitely forgetting more of the same, Ishida can’t write a good death, he needed the anime writers to do it for him.

9. Kaneki. Just. Kaneki.

God they fucking butchered this man. I could go on about his character is weird and confusing in the manga from the beginning, but we’re focusing on mostly all his weird :re character development, the bad handling of Haise and his memories, and all his iterations.

Before I read :re, what I could glean from fanart and the occasional fic that wasn’t tagged properly was really confusing and kind of a mixed bag. I knew Haise was Kaneki but without his memories, now in the ccg trying to be a pacifist and going :DDDDD a lot yknow. And what I came up with in my own mind for that change was a deal of (this makes more sense with the anime canon tbh, the manga honestly doesn’t do any of this well) like Kaneki after The Shit Went Down With Hide (whichever canon you’d like to interpret that as) he basically realized that he really couldn’t be a ghoul, he didn’t want to be, he didn’t want to hurt people and he wanted to be happy and make other people happy instead of what he thought was right before (trying to fight to protect others on his own etc) because that mentality had gotten people he loved hurt, and well subconsciously I guess that kind of factored into his development into Haise and maybe caused his memory loss (along with the, yknow, shanked eye.) So when I started to read it that kind of checked out, this is what he’s trying so hard to be now. But then this whole bullshit of the whole other like, 37 different versions of kaneki complicated things.

Haise was scared that when he got his memories back he would cease to be, well, Haise, and he would just like revert back to what he was before everything. Which I can understand him being scared of and I think was a good point in the plot for him to worry about that, but I was like “oh honey don’t worry that’s not how it works” and was kind of vying for him to eventually get his memories back, come to terms with the fact that those were his memories, he did do those things, he was half a ghoul, and maybe come back to his original fight of wanting to bring the humans and ghouls together, still caring about his human people in the ccg and all. That development was real, and it wouldn’t just go away if he got his memories back, he learned a lot and grew a lot and he has a different outlook on life now. Right?

Fucking wrong I guess. Dude gets his memories back (very ambiguously, it was really hard to tell when that even happened tbh) and like. Turns into a flaming ass looking like ebony darkness dementia raven way. Haise gone. Fucking completely. No trace left. Doesn’t care about his kids anymore. When he’s done with that and goes white again he’s just Kaneki again and there’s really not enough left of things that like, really wouldn’t go away? He loses the flair? The dumbass? The :D? The Extra? WHY? Why would those things go away? Haise shouldn’t have been right that he would disappear when he got back his memories. That killed me. I love Kaneki and all but H a i s e. He is my b o y. H i m. With his e n e r g y s h o r t s. And his m o m. And his c o o k i n g. And his k i d s, I l o v e him. And Ishida doesn’t seem to realize that they’re... literally the same person. Haise isn’t just some stupid bastard occupying Kaneki’s body, he’s a valid part of Kaneki himself and to be honest, peak Kaneki. Should have stayed that way. Would have been great for Hide tbh. Not just having him pretty much revert to his old self, but basically respond equally to both names and balance the world between human and ghoul. I would have loved that. What happened for real? It doesn’t make sense and it breaks my heart.

Some people on the interwebz try to kind of even that whole deal out by trying to say he like, has DID, which although is obviously a valid thing, like, so does not apply to him. God I’m like so not an expert on this but I feel like it’s not that hard to tell. His 87 little Kanekis in his head aren’t separate personas, they’re metaphorical representations of his past morals, experiences, and ideologies that all conflict. Again Haise here is peak conflict because when he gets his memories back, he has all these different conflicting ideas that were all previously separate. They’re all him. Tortured Kaneki constantly yelling at him in Jason’s chamber is basically again, a metaphor for how he’s denying his ghoulhood and the trauma that he’s been dealt. It’s not that this dude still exists just the way he is ready to show up at any moment lmao. Ishida kind of dealt with that badly too because Haise really said

after his memories happened so I can see why people might, but it’s... not right, and it’s Ishida’s fault about that which is Incorrect

Also just blanket statement, black reaper Kaneki? Fuck him and all he stands for. 0% valid. I can excuse literally every other version of him. But wh y. God he leaves the room and Urie starts misusing his power and getting groomed by a pedo, Saiko is just, left behind and sad, Mutsuki gets captured by a perv and mentally destroyed again, Shirazu dies and the bitch is like like “lol it’s your fault” yeah helpful, die

10. P- the- the porn chapter-

Idk about you but that was so fucking unecessary??? Not even going off of how terribly awkward and weird it was to have it there when the opening was “i’m sad about my best friend who’s gonna get executed what do you do when you’re sad about your best friend” “i simply do not think of him or i might actually just curl up and die” “yo lmao same” “wanna fuck” Like ok um I’m biased bc i’m not straight but I like, really hated that. Even just flipping through the pages as fast as I could to get to the end of it like. God. It’s not a fucking hentai. I’m here for the plot. If you’re not gonna release the director’s cut of kaneki fucking voring hide, i don’t think i need to see 20 pages of straight fucking sex. And if you absolutely must have porn, kaneki is a fucking bottom. That man gets pegged do not try to prove otherwise. You started it out that way god I love how they’re like “oh god wait that looks kind of gay, the woman being dominant, better stop that right now” god Ishida not having a single iota of knowlege about his own characters aND THEN SHE GETS PREGNANT? NO. Excuse me. No. I just. I. Why. This isn’t. A fucking porno. This isn’t tentacle porn i swear oh my god kill me

11. Giving the wrong characters attention

Basically, redeeming characters that should have been redeemed and not going into/discussing characters that should have been redeemed/had more backstory. For example, Tsukiyama can go fucking die. I like, do not even care rich boy. I don’t understand how anyone could think he needed to be redeemed he’s just a gay attention whore who really needs to let this kid get on with his merry fucking life. I don’t care. I literally did not need to read three whole books about his dumbass hangup over eating Kaneki. Kaneki doesn’t fucking want you bitch move on. He didn’t need to be redeemed or seen to be in any way sympathetic, no one wanted it. Same with that bitch ass Furuta, he wasn’t really redeemed but he was given w a y too much time to play out his sob story. God man Rize doesn’t fucking want you. These gross ass simps. I swear.

On the other hand, I kind of liked Eto even though she’s a pile of shit, and I got mad when they didn’t really go into much about her. And you know who could have gotten much more screen time/development? TOUKA. God, I love her and she was just sitting around in the background being straight. Let her have some spicy development. Also obviously, Hide. He was... so underappreciated and underexplained? What happened with him? He didn’t just pick himself off the ground in the sewers and go ‘well i’d better get back to the ccg now’ we have a whole two years which are completely unexplained, most of which he was off mysteriously being involved in things but completely missing the eye of Haise and other major players. Where tf was he? How did he get around? What was he even doing??? I wanna know about that! Not all the characters I hate’s tragic backstories that make me feel 0% more sympathetic towards them :)

12. ARE WE ALL JUST GONNA COLLECTIVELY IGNORE THE WHOLE VORE THING???

Ok like i know i say “the entire reason I read :re was __” but like to be honest this was the turning point, I saw pictures of hide’s vore face and went like

So I was like “god fucking damn it ok, Ishida would you care to explain this to me” *cracks open re*

And then they DIDN’T.

Like. It’s actually laughable how much that entire situation was just glossed over. They gave that maybe like two pages. Like what. I. This manga has more sex scene than no homoing that. They just don’t even bother to. I feel like Ishida had that as a plot point but realized halfway in how it looked (i.e., really fucking gay) and decided that was something that he was just gonna, not deal with. Just act like that’s a completely normal heterosexual bro thing to do. Like of course anywhere would be pretty gay but Kaneki chose his face. His face. Like his face and his wholeass neck and his shoulders and nowhere else. (and assumedly like, his tongue, seeing as how the dude can’t talk... bruh) Dude really said extreme hickey. French kiss to the max. Ishida clearly did realize that generally, you can only get a bitten off face by,,, having your face bitten off, which is just inherently really fucking gay. Like, I’m just at a loss as to how it even makes sense. You wouldn’t think that the skin off his face, and specifically around his mouth, would really be the most nutritious thing to consume? I can get like the shoulders but generally you’d think something like his arm or leg would be 1.less inconvenient, and 2.much more logical and nutritious? But NO, Kaneki was like “you know what i’m gonna do? eat your Face” and hide’s like “lmao sounds cool”

(not to mention, wasn’t there another guy with a vore face somewhere? like that old guy in the ccg with the bigass turtleneck, i wanna know about him) But like... my bro Ishida went “yeah this happened but i’m going to cover it up with speech bubbles and the ends of panels guys they clearly had their socks on” Dude didn’t even TRY to explain otherwise. Like hey man, that’s pretty damn gay, you are kind of at liberty to either tell me why otherwise, or accept those implications and acknowledge them?? It’s really hilarious when you ignore it cause it’s like

kind of

pretty damn

WEAK of you to leave it at that fucking pissbaby

hmmmmmmmmm however could this happen i guess we’ll never know

13. What the fuck was even the plot omg

God I’ve been writing this post for like five hours so like, I’ll keep it short but like it made sense in the original, not to be like an anime fan but the anime made fucking sense (not re i mean like the original) this lore is so fucking stupid god, the horrors of the entire fucking dragon arc bleach my eyes, unresolved plotlines who???? (the whole ‘oh yeah also ur dying of old age’ thing etc, is kaneki like??? still doing that?? or was that randomly resolved with the whole spewing ovary bullshit i’m going to fucking kill myself) and to top it off, good job Ishida at a real fucking cheap ending.

You gave them. Fake human. Really? They just come up with artificial human at the end. Kind of undermines the entire fucking story my guy. Ah yes throw out our whole plot. That was the whole tragedy. You gotta eat human. The ghouls have to eat human and that’s tragic bc they have to kill people or whatever. Or i guess they fucking don’t well fucking ok. God you could have just had them negotiate a kind of peace where the ghouls can get dead humans and such, there are plenty of them and no one has to kill anyone then, there could be a rule system for it, it would be messy but eventually everyone would be ok with it, and I think that would work a lot better than “quick fix i made some hamburger helper human you can eat it fine” guys wtf. It’s like Ishida started plotting out the ending for re approximately 2 hours before his deadline. Anyway yes I hate re and I love yelling about it thank you for coming to my ted talk.

#tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul re #essay post #god just fucking kill me #rowan's hyperfixation essays

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emilx311 · 3 years

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*pops out of hiding and waves shyly* Hi, yes, I am alive. Yes this is an actual chapter. Yes I am sorry, if you want some idea of what the past couple years have been like for me check out my pinned post “life update”, though long story short I got a job as a night auditor at a hotel and am now half running the hotel (I am not supposed to be, I did not sign up for this, all I did was be present and competent). I apologize in advance, I actually really debated changing the contents of this chapter since I thought the long wait was enough angst for you lot, but my brain refused to provide any other ideas for advancing the plot but this one (which was the plan for this chapter back when I first began it in 2019). *phases back in to hiding*

Chapter can be read below the cut or on AO3

Tobirama spends hours there on his knees, paying for his kin and listening for anything outside that might suggest the battle’s end. It seems the longest few hours he was ever lived, which is saying something coming from him who has spent much of his life left behind and waiting. He wants to scratch off his own skin, tear himself apart until he is able to get the damned cuff off and run to his family. Logically he knows that he wouldn’t be able to help them even if he was still back at the Senju compound, but logic has no place in the fear and dread he feels. Here he is, caged and useless while those he loves fight for him. He has not felt so helpless since he was a child forced to watch as his brothers went off one by one to fight a war he was banned from. He can still see their backs as they exited the compound, one after another younger and weaker than him and yet deemed less of a liability. It is a visceral reminder of why he hates the Uchiha so much, of what he is fighting for, of what is at stake.

It is this reminder that keeps him still, keeps him from doing anything reckless. Much as he longs to scream, to run, to cause damage and death, he knows that doing so would only hurt his cause and thus the ones he loves more. He would only cause himself to be labelled as dangerous, rebellious, a risk-or worst of all they might even deduce his clan status, the one secret he needs to keep above all others. He’d end up even more locked away than he already was, under tighter guard and more powerful seals, denied even the slight freedoms he has now-the freedoms he needs if he is ever to escape. No, he will not allow his emotions to control him the way he longs to; instead, he tempers his feelings and uses them to fuel his resolve. He will do whatever he has to in order to make it back to his family.

When he hears the ringing of bells and the clamour of rushing feet an underminable time later he finally forces himself to stand. He meticulously washes his face to clear away all evidence of his few furious tears and then settles himself on the futon. He closes his eyes and focusses on regulating his breathing, projecting an illusion of clam and tranquility. If he has his way the Uchiha will assume he’d been meditating throughout the lockdown.

While careful to maintain his calm demeanor on the outside, he still burns on the inside. Never has he felt so cut-off from the world as he does now. Before he has, at least, always had the reassurance of his sensing, of being able to reach out and feel his brothers and their conditions even if he couldn’t be there with them. Now the cuff on his wrist had cut him off from even that bit of comfort, leaving him utterly bereft. He’d never felt as weak and pathetic as he did at present-not even when, as a child, he’d been told he would never, could never, be allowed to join the rest of his kin on the battlefield, not because of his skill but because of the colour of his eyes. Hating the helpless feeling, Tobirama resolves to double his efforts to find a way around the cuff just as a great cheer rose from outside, followed by a sudden sharp, profound silence.

Tobirama feels the burning inside his chest turn to ice. Terror the likes of which he’d only felt that fateful day facing Madara and Izuna filled him. Such a reaction from the Uchiha can only mean that something must have happened-something dramatic and significant. The suspense, the not knowing burrows into him like a thousand senbon needles stabbing into his skin. Whatever has happened will affect him, even if it was good for his clan, it may very well end up being bad for him personally. Still, as much as he hates it there is nothing he can do about it at present, not until he is given more information and very possibly not even then-not without damning himself.

Luckily for Tobirama’s sanity, Indra stumbles into his room less than an hour later. The brunette seems oddly disheveled, especially given he had not even been part of the day’s battle. His hair was in disarray, as though he’d been tugging on it, his eyes clothing slightly dusty and his eyes wide and unfocused, as though not actually seeing any of what was in front of him. In fact, Tobirama realized quickly, the Uchiha did not really seem to be taking anything in at all. Mentally he was not present with Tobirama, his demeanor that of someone in a profound state of shock and behaving as though he were in a trance.

“Indra?” Tobirama asked softly, his concern growing as the other does not respond, and in fact shows no sign of even having heard him.

“Indra??” He tries again, slightly louder, while grabbing the Uchiha’s hand. This, thankfully, seems to do the trick and jolt the other back to the present.

“Bright-eyes?” Indra chokes out before suddenly dropping to his knees in front of Tobirama, pulling the albino to himself with a soft cry and burying his face in to thick white hair.

The Uchiha was shaking, Tobirama noticed distantly as his mind scrambled to guess what could have happened that would have affected Indra so deeply. From what Tobirama had seen of him, Indra did care deeply for his clan as a whole, and as such would do his best for any he considered to be a member of that clan, but he did not display very much personal or individual attachment to most members. Given that, for Indra to be reacting like this meant that whatever had happened it had to involve someone close to him, likely either his father Tajima or his brothers. But, if something had happened to a member of the head family, why had there initially been cheering? It made no sense to him.

Knowing he would get no answers until Indra got calmed down, Tobirama loosened his stiff posture and wrapped his arms around the Uchiha. He then brought one of his hands up and began stroking the other’s long brown hair. The pair stayed like this for several long minutes as Tobirama’s anxiety grew and Indra calmed. When the Uchiha finally starts to pull away, Tobirama carefully schools his face until the only emotion showing is slight concern, which Tobirama hopes Indra will assume is due to the state the Uchiha was in. (Tobirama hates that this is not entirely false, that he is even the slightest bit effected by seeing the other in pain. It is not much, but even a little is too much given his position.)

“I’m sorry about that bright-eyes, I’m no usually so…emotional” Indra apologized, looking rather sheepish.

“It’s alright” Tobirama assures him, and after a brief hesitation dares to ask, “what happened?” The question causes a flash of pain to flicker over Indra’s face and Tobirama tells himself he feels no remorse for causing it. “If I am allowed to know” the albino hurries to add, making sure to keep up the polite, well-mannered façade he had settled in to. He has too much at stake to break character now, especially not for news he can likely learn just by listening around the compound in the next few days.

“No, no-news will reach you soon enough anyway. Besides, the blessed are equal members of the clan, and as such are privy to the same information as any other Uchiha would be.” Indra assures him and Tobirama has to bite his tongue once again to keep from expressing his disbelief. Instead, he simply cocks his head at Indra in an invitation for him to elaborate, which the Uchiha thankfully does.

“Today’s battle with the Senju was far worse than usual” Indra begins, “according to those who were there the Senju, to a man, seemed enraged. Far beyond the usual level of distaste and hatred brought out by seeing an old foe for yet another battle. No one is quite certain why, but in any case, they fought like men possessed, especially the clan head and his sons. Father was unprepared for the onslaught; he was cut down by Senju Butsuma.” Tobirama notices that Indra says his father’s name with the same harsh tones his family use when they speak the names of the Uchiha. It is hardly a surprise, though it is a painful reminder that Indra is only kind to him because he does not know Tobirama’s true identity. Still, Tobirama allows his shock to show on his face, it is real enough, but lets absolutely nothing else slip through. Tajima’s death is a huge advantage for the Senju, but he does not know what it will mean for him, trapped as he was here, with the Uchiha.

Tobirama opens his mouth to convey his, utterly false, condolences when Indra continues, “Butsuma’s sword went straight through his heart, but father has never been the type to simply slay down and allow his death. With his last breath father managed to stab Butsuma in turn, well into the stomach.” Tobirama is frozen, too shocked to react. He knows what Indra has not said, what the Uchiha does not need to say-a wound of the type his father took is guarantied to be fatal. His father is dead, oh his heart may yet beat but he will not last longer than a day or two, and, much as Tobirama wants to lash out at the Uchiha in front of him (the son of his father’s murderer) while his guard is so far down, he cannot. If he ever wants to get home to the rest of his family, to his brothers and Touka, he cannot show any reaction to this news. It burns, the knowledge he cannot mourn the father who loved him and likely went to his death thinking Tobirama dead and blaming himself for it, for letting his son leave the safety of their clan compound. It is yet another knife in his heart, another injury at the Uchiha’s hands, and another thing to fuel his determination to escape.

“So, what will happen now?” Tobirama asks, as he realizes the silence has begun to stretch on for too long to be normal, his tone utterly even. It is an important question, the death of a clan head can lead to a lot of changes both outside, and especially, inside a clan. In a perfect world the next Uchiha head would be against, and perhaps even abolish, their tradition of keeping the blessed trapped and caged within their compound. But, Tobirama holds no hope of that, not knowing as he did that the tradition went back generations, perhaps even since the founding of the clan, and as such is deeply, deeply ingrained into the Uchiha culture. Almost as ingrained as their war with his clan, and there has certainly been no signs of that coming to an end anytime soon. Besides that, from what he knows Madara is the heir, and Madara was one of the ones to capture him and bring him back here. Additionally, Madara and Indra were raised together, and Indra has certainly shown nothing but support for the tradition.

“Madara will take father’s place as the head of our clan. He has been being prepared for this for years, since we all knew this day would come sometime. It shouldn’t be too difficult a transition, especially since the Senju will not be in a position to try and take advantage of it. Very little should change in the daily running of the clan, or of the compound, including your day-to-day life” Indra tells him, confirming most of Tobirama’s thoughts and assumptions about the situation.

“Well,” Indra corrects, “that is not entirely true. With all the responsibilities and duties Madara will now have to take on he will need more of my time and help than he has before, especially since I am now the de facto heir until he is able to have children. Because of this I won’t be able to spend as much time with you.” Tobirama allows his grimace to show on his face. Without Indra to accompany him he’d either be restricted to his rooms, or at least the house, or he would be assigned a new guard to follow him around, neither of which sounded particularly pleasant to him.

Being stuck in the house would mean putting all his current plans and efforts on hold. He would be unable to examine the compound, try to determine guard schedules, observe the shinobi and learn their weaknesses, or continue with his research into the cuff and its seals. Being assigned a different guard would mean he could continue with these things, but it posed several annoying issues of its own. While whoever they stuck him with was likely to be less powerful than Indra was, they would also be a complete unknown. With Indra he at least knew the other’s fighting style to an extent, knew how the other thought and how to act and react according to and around him in order to minimize suspicion. Having to redetermine all this for a new individual and alter his actions based off that would be, as the Nara said, a drag, and he was not looking forward to having to do so.

“Going to miss me bright-eyes?” Indra asks, grinning at the albino’s expression.

“You’re tolerable to have around I suppose” Tobirama allows, to the Uchiha’s happiness.

“Quite the compliment, coming from you” Indra teases, enjoying the way it makes the other’s nose wrinkle.

“I’ve just gotten used to you, that’s all” Tobirama says, making the Uchiha laugh.

“I am told I grow on people” he comments, causing Tobirama to roll his eyes.

“Not like I had a choice, you being around all the time-not that that will be an issue for much longer” the albino snarks, unsurprised to see Indra’s eyes flash with irritation. “It shouldn’t be too hard to get used to whoever is sent to replace you” he adds, unable to keep himself from stoking the Uchiha’s fire and rewarded with a jealous growl from the other.

“Perhaps, but I doubt you will have the chance to find out” the brunette snaps, and Tobirama worries he has pushed too far. He opens his mouth to apologize-anything to make sure he won’t be forced to spend the foreseeable future trapped and alone in these four walls, but Indra holds up a hand to stop him before he can.

“I’m sorry bright-eyes, I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just stressed-this seemed to come out of nowhere, and I’m annoyed that so much of my time with you is likely to be taken away for the coming weeks, but I know it must be equally stressful for you. You have only been here for a few weeks after all, and have barely gotten used to me and now this. It is no surprise you would dislike the idea of having to go back to being constantly around what essentially amounts to a complete stranger would be upsetting to you, and that that upset would cause you to lash out slightly the way you did” Indra says soothingly and honestly.

Tobirama is once again surprised by how insightful, intelligent, and even empathetic the other could be. He mourns, as he has several times before, that the other had been born an Uchiha and insisted on keeping Tobirama trapped here. He mused (again) that were the situation not what it was he could see them as having been friends, or perhaps even more. But the situation was what it was and Tobirama had too much respect for himself to ever form any relationship, romantic or otherwise, with someone who would limit him as the Uchiha, and Indra, did and would.

Indra continued, “you don’t have to be concerned, what I meant when I said you would not need to find out if you could get used to another was not that you would be locked away here whenever I was not around, but that Madara and I have talked it over and decided you no longer need a constant guard. You have behaved very well since you arrived here, have caused no problems and are integrating well with others in the compound, thus, we feel that the restrictions on you may be lightened somewhat.” Tobirama was shocked and unable to hide it. He had expected it to take months and months if not years to gain any level of trust, and with-it freedoms, but here it was being given to him already.

Indra grinned at his reaction, but was quick to elaborate before Tobirama got too excited, “there will still be limitations. You won’t be permitted to go to training fields while you are alone, though Hikaku is considered sufficient should Hasami invite you to spar. You are not allowed weapons, and will not be given access to your chakra. The guards around the compound will still be keeping a close eye on you, and I will be by to check-in and accompany you around periodically. But if you continue to adapt to life here as you have been we will be able to grant you more freedoms in time.”

Tobirama nods, unsurprised to hear about the limitations, after all even this little spec of freedom was more than he’d expected. Being able to browse the library and read without someone watching over his shoulder was a boon beyond word. It meant he would actually be able to concentrate on finding information about the cuff and potential weaknesses of the compound, or the Uchiha themselves without trying to disguise his interest in certain books or waste time reading those he knew would gain him nothing as a diversion.

“I understand, I’ll stay within the village proper whenever I’m alone” Tobirama says obediently. It was a promise he actually intended to obey in truth for a change, at least for the moment. Anything grained from trying to sneak around was very unlikely to be more valuable to him than this newfound freedom.

Satisfied with his promise, Indra left him to go seek out his brothers while Tobirama took the time to try and sort through everything that had happened. Hearing about his father’s death this way was still a devastation, but he knew that his father would be pleased his actions had given his son a new edge in his battle. He would use this edge, his newfound freedoms, wisely. He would take full advantage of them in order to speed up his escape. He would use the privileges his father had unknowingly bought him with his life to survive and make it back to his remaining family-as Butsuma would want him to. His brothers needed him, and as always, their needs were his greatest motivators. He had already lost one family member while he was trapped here, he would not allow it to happen again.

#Emi says #Emi writes #Captured Crimson #fanfiction #IndraTobi #Indra #Tobirama #Uchiha #Senju

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permanentlyexhaustedpossum · 4 years

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A Red Riding Hood Story - Madatobi Fairytale #4

Elements: A serial killer, deception and honesty, Someone gets Eaten

Inspiration: The VERY Messed Up Origins of Little Red Riding Hood | Fables Explainedhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3-XJSwWTLk

Music to Listen to While Reading:Brian Reitzell and Alex Heffes - Wolf attack (Red Riding Hood)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ew5T4iayAmw&list=PL596FDB32F122DE52&index=8

---- This wasn't the first time he'd traveled to visit the Oracle. Most of the time it was with a small squad of adults but since he'd come of age, Tobirama was intent to take the path alone. His brother warned him though,

"Don't stray from the path." The young man rolled his eyes and pulled the dark red cloak on, grabbing the basket of offerings. "I'm not a child, Hashirama." But his words fell on deaf ears, as all the elder boy could do was watch with worry and anticipation as his snowy haired fourteen year old brother left before dawn, the darkness falling over his shoulders like an ominous drapery that neither could escape. It was winter solstice and dawn would be with them soon, but the light only lasted so long in the heart of winter. He paced, watching the darkness of the forest envelop the red cloak and the lantern. And he felt despair.

Ignoring the rising uncertainty in his heart, the young man pressed forward in the darkness. Tobirama had been walking this path since he was eight, taking the burden of the Oracle's offerings from his brother who took it from his father. It was his turn yet again, and it would be until Kawarama turned eight in one more year. Sure steps became shorter in the darkness, as the path trailed it's way from left to right, around trees and through the ravine he remembered well. What he didn't, in the early light of morning as it splashed across dead and sleeping trees, was the rock slide that wasn't there weeks ago when he'd made his last trip. He stopped, raising the lantern to see better in the just barely there morning glow. He frowned. What ever had happened up on the mountain side, this was the effect.

"Problems?" A deep voice rumbled from off the trail. "None that concern you, Spirit." Tobirama quipped, not excited at all that he'd been watched this whole time. "Guess it doesn't." It huffed, a low growl and Tobirama straightened, making no quick movements. This was no spirit. This was a wolf. "Then I guess you won't need help getting over it... or... around..." It teased. The red eyed boy turned slowly, looking to the sides for a way around, the rocks only piled higher on the right and on the left... a drop off to the forest floor below. "Tch." The sunlight was slowly creeping over the hillside, through the trees and Tobirama needed to think fast. "And what? You know a way around?" "As a matter of fact-" "No." "Hey I wasn't finished!" The wolf padded out as Tobirama started to climb the rocks in an attempt to get over, only realizing afterwards how hard it'd be with the offerings. He clung to the side. "You're gonna fall." "No I won't. I am sticking to the path." He could almost hear the wolf roll his eyes.

The wolf watched him struggle for a good half hour with the rocks only to slide or almost fall. "You could just let me carry your basket. You've almost broken the damn thing just trying to get over this rock." "Tch." Tobirama was only getting madder by the moment, having to listen to the goading wolf, no doubt waiting for him to fall or fail, tired and miserable so he could tear into him like the beast- "Ugh you're so annoying." The wolf bounded up and around, grabbing at the cloak tied securely around Tobirama and tugging. The boy began to fight. "Stop! I will skin you!" The wolf let out an annoyed huff, dragging him the rest of the way up the hill without remorse only to drop him at the top and sit back on his hind legs. The damn thing had the audacity to look smug. Tobirama grunted, moving slow and getting up, watching in the morning light. "Suppose you want a thank you." The boy spat, watching the black wolf and his unusual red eyes. "A kiss would be nice.. yes?" The wolf barked the moment the rock hit him in the face. "I deserved that." A huff from the snowy teen under the red hood. "You're an asshole." It huffed right back. “I'm only trying to help you. This path is dangerous. You need to take another route." "I won't." Tobirama denied it, unsure what the wolf's intentions were, but ignoring him for the rest of the morning as he struggled to get down the other side of the rocks without damaging the offerings or breaking a leg.

Halfway through the day and most of the way down the trail, Tobirama realized the wolf was either really patient or really bored. Neither would bode well. He gripped the dagger inside his cloak tightly, on edge and wondering when-"You know you should really watch where youre-" "Ah!" "Going." The wolf stood at the edge of the small drop off Tobirama managed to not see and fall right into. "Fuck you!" He shouted from the bottom of the ravine. "That... would be nice however-" "Disgusting asshole!" A groan escaped the wolf and he almost looked human the way he brought a paw to his face. "I'm coming down there. Don't stab me with that pig sticker!" "Don't you dare-"

The dark wolf bounded down, paws crunching in the snow and twigs and Tobirama stiffened until-"Get on." The wolf bent down, a dark contrast in the snow. Tobirama fought the idea for a moment before he realized he wasn't going to shake the wolf like this. "Fine. But no funny business." "Wouldn't dream of it." Pale hands gripped dark fur as the young boy climbed onto the wolf's back and held the basket close. And off they went, bounding around the snow and rocky drop offs, through the sleeping trees and in the warm sunlight. The wolf didn't try to steer to far from the path, though they could not reach it from where they were below. "What's your name?" "I wish I could remember." Came the reply. "Most wolves do not speak." "How clever of you to have figured that out." Tobirama looked up at the sky, feeling the warmth of the fur beneath his legs and in his hand.

-- Hashirama nearly wailed when his father forbid him from going after Tobirama. "It's his duty. You will not interfere or the Oracle may see it as a threat." "He should have been there an hour ago! And the crystals haven't glowed!" He watched Butsuma's face twist. He knew it too. Hell they all did. But this was Tobirama's first time alone and he was determined that nothing should go awry. "Fine. But you're not to approach the Oracle in anyway!"Not needing another word, Hashirama snatched his axe and cloak and bolted out the door. Butsuma grumbled. "Those Uchiha better not have gotten in the way. They know how sacred this is. Kawarama!" "Yes Father?" The boy of seven came running from the other room. "Fetch your cousin, Touka. I need to send a missive." --

"What are you doing?" "Taking you around. Would you rather die in another ditch?" "Don't be an asshole." The wolf carefully jumped down further away from the elevated trail and onto rocks, going further down. "Besides I think you'd like this. To-bi-ra-ma." The boy rolled his eyes until they rounded the corner and his ruby eyes widened. He'd never seen a frozen waterfall before. His grip tightened in the fur. "See? We should stop for a moment." "We should not." But his words were breathy. "Come on. It won't get you killed." The wolf padded closer and bent down for the boy to get off. "If anything it might save your life." He grumbled. "How?" Tobirama quipped. "Knowing where water is, is always a good idea." The wolf backtracked quickly, not realizing at first how impressive Tobirama's hearing was. The boy played with the idea for a moment but his curiosity got the best of him and he bounded off, crunching through the snow to get a better look. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, glistening in the sunlight like giant crystals of clarity. Time slipped away from him and before he knew it, Tobirama was watching the sun grow golden and his heartbeat sped up. "You! You tricked me!" "I did no such thing." The wolf lazily cleaned his paw, finishing his tiny rabbit meal. Tobirama lost his cool, stomping up to the big wolf and kicked the carcass and snow in his face. "You kept me here!" "You wanted to stay. 'Explore the cavern' you said. It's not my fault you took all afternoon!" He huffed, right in the boy's face. "Take me to the Oracle! Right! Now!" The snowy boy demanded, an accusatory finger at the wolf. Who for a moment, looked like he was debating something, hesitating. "Right now!" "You really don't wanna go." "Why not?!" "She's not like you think-" The indignant sounds the boy made only aggravated him, "Look kid, you need to be more careful, you donno what you're walking into!" "I know just fine." The boy pulled his dagger and the wolf rolled his eyes. "You're just a kid, you don't know anything!" He pawed the thing right from his hand, and huffed, leaning close. "I'm trying to help you." The boy's face twisted for a moment, seeing no way out. "Take. Me. To. The. Oracle." "No. I'm not going anywhere near that witch. You can go if you're so dead set on it. But it's not my fault if you wind up dead." He huffed, almost disappointed and for a moment, Tobirama missed the warmth of the wolf's fur. "Fine." He turned on his heel and crunched across the snow heading North where he could find another trail. The wolf settled down in the snow, watching the red cloak disappear in the white and black forest, angry at himself and the boy.

-- "Grandmother!" Tobirama called from outside the cozy little shack surrounded by twisted trees and curling bushes. Silence was his answer and he began to worry. "Grandmother! It's Tobirama! I am here with the offerings!" He crunched in the darkness of the snow, lantern high, and inwardly cursing the wolf that kept him away for so long. A flicker of light caught his eye and he moved closer, realizing the door was open. Wonder and worry shot through him and he quickly opened the door, pulling back the red hood. "Grandmother!" "In here, little one." Came the slightly unfamiliar growl of her voice.

Tobirama paused, remembering the wolf's words and wondering for the first time that day what it meant and why a wolf would tell him such things. He was no fool. His grandmother was a witch and a vindictive woman. He had no idea how old she was really or if she was even his father's mother. "Coming." He slowly set the basket on the small table, littered with her ingredients... that were covered in dust. He hesitated, then pushed the door to her bedroom open to darkness. "The path was blocked today, Grandmother." "Of course it was, my dear. Come, it's been weeks. Let me look at you.." Tobirama inched closer, eyes already bad enough with poor vision, trying to adjust to the darkness. "Are you sick? Your voice is deeper than I remember." "All the better for you to hear me, my dear." She beckoned him closer and he moved very slow, fingers on the edge of her bed sheets. "Your eyes.. they glow, Grandmother.” "All the better to see you with." She continued, and he felt the panic began to rise in his chest, drawing closer to see the fur poking out from her long gown sleeve. "What big hands you have now..." He was no fool, but any sudden movement would likely set her off. He had no idea what'd become of her. "All the better to hold you with my dear." "And your teeth? They're so sharp and long." Hoping she'd drop whatever illusion this may be, because the old hag was truly starting to unnerve him, Tobirama pressed on. "All the better to," She jerked forward, grabbing him by the arm and startling him, "eat you with, my dear."

Tobirama scrambled in her grip, somewhere between human and wolf, reaching for his dagger when- He remembered the dark wolf had batted it away in the snow. Within seconds, he was thrown across the room, clattering into other objects and slipping as he scrambled for the window only for the wolf to slam it shut, snarling in front of it, ripping the gown as it grew to full wolf frame. He scrambled backwards, bolting for the bedroom door instead, and coming face to face with the red eyed wolf from earlier. A paw reached out and shoved him to the ground. "DOWN!" He roared, then snarled, squaring off with the old woman turned wolf between the bedroom door and her tiny room. Tobirama felt the brush of fur as the male pounced forward, and heard the crash of everything breaking, two giant wolves battling in the small bedroom. He gathered his courage and scrambled for the door, pausing just before exiting. In a moment of clarity, he snatched the offerings basket and made his way back out into the snow.

-- It lasted maybe thirty seconds, but the fight was brutal. Two massive wolves, clawing the inside of a damaged bedroom, tangled in its many fabrics and intricacies when the dark wolf heard the final growl and whimper of the old woman, her throat hanging from his jowls. He panted, dropped the flesh and limped back, making sure she was dead when he heard Tobirama's voice from outside the cabin. "Don't! It's not what you think!" The panic alone made him worry when his nose caught wind of the small party that'd shown up, namely a boy that smelled awfully familiar and the scent of steel. His fur raised. He couldn't take them all. And all he could do was run. He leaned up and when he heard the front door burst open, bolted through the window crashing through the glass and wood, landing in the snow. "The wolf!" One of the boys cried and Tobirama let out a strangled sound of protest. The wolf looked over and then bolted for his life. Hunters.

Without a second thought, the boys ran after the wolf, crying and screaming about the dead oracle, Hashirama in the lead. There was no way for Tobirama to catch up, no way for him to track down the wolf. He sank into the snow, feeling the cold of the night seeping through his clothes and his torn cloak and fought the urge to weep.

When the yelling had slowed, the darkness too much for the hunting party, he dragged himself from the snow and back into the cabin. He couldn't make heads or tails of the bedroom, so he shut the door and sat down at the table in the main room. Where did he go wrong? What happened to his Grandmother Oracle? Why did- He paused, realizing what he was looking at and reached across the table to pick up the jar.

"A human heart?" He turned the jar, watching the organ float in the liquid and took a look around. The wolf knew about her. Wanted to warn him that she was not who she appeared to be. Was she killing humans? The boy set the jar down and threw open all the cabinetry doors, the pantry, and stepped back, horrified at the human remains stuffed in jars. That's when he wondered. How long had he been visiting her? How long had she kept this hidden, fed him and his brother! His father! Fed these people to them?! Tobirama turned sharply, vomiting into an empty pot and shaking.

"Brother!" Hashirama's voice cut through the fog of disbelief, and the young man must have not realized what the room held because he lurched for Tobirama first, grabbing him and looking him over. "You're alright. Thank god you're alright! That wolf he- he ravaged the Oracle!" "No." "What?" "She... He was trying to protect me." The dumbfounded look on the darker boy's face made Tobirama angry but he only snatched his chin and made him look around, telling him to pay attention.

-- "Tobirama?" "What?" The boy finished stitching his cloak back together, his brothers and father watching him with worry as he grabbed the offering basket, now three days later, with fresh meat and bread instead of odd jars of things the old woman wanted. He grabbed a bottle of wine and secured it all. "You can't be serious." "I am serious!" He whirled on Hashirama. "And I've never been more serious in all my life. You saw that cabin! Every man in the village saw was was inside! And he's a wolf! He can talk! I'm going to find out why he knew!" "He may not even be alive. We ran him down the mountain." "He has a name! That means he was human once like her. I just have to find his name." "You really believe that old tale?" Butsuma was skeptical, watching the young man tie the red cloak. "I do. I have to." And with that, he was off to the bottom of the mountain, towards the other side in haste.

He had to find him, and he needed to find his name. He walked for hours, calling out to the wolf, trying to remember where he'd found him before, while on his way towards the Uchihas. Unsuccessful at finding the wolf before dusk, he moved as fast as his legs would carry him towards the encampment he'd been told his whole life to stay away from. For good reason too. Tobirama cautiously approached the gate, hunters watching him with red eyes, arrows trained on him. Pale hands went up. "Please! I need to speak with your leader!" "State your business!" He bit his lip, knowing he was going to sound just as crazy but upon seeing their red eyes and dark hair, he was more sure. "I have reason to believe one of your own has been turned into a wolf!" Whispers and murmurings. He continued, "He speaks! Says he doesn't remember his name and-" "That's crazy! Get out of here kid!" "No please-"

"Let me see him." A deep voice cut through and the hunters looked surprised as an older man opened the small door in the gate, walking through. "A son of Senju. I received a letter about you..." He eyed the red cloak. "Speak quickly, boy." As quickly as Tobirama could, he recounted his tale of the wolf and the oracle, what he'd heard and seen as darkness fell upon them. "That's... a wild tale. Our people go missing from time to time on hunting trips. I'd like to see this cabin." "Not until we find the wolf. We need to know his name." "He could be anybody." Tobirama frowned, insistent on his case. "But, we do have a list of missing. Perhaps calling their names may... bring this wolf close. It is dark. You'll perish out there. Come." Slowly, Tobirama followed the man inside the camp, on edge and unsure, but hoping for the best.

-- The next morning, as the snow fell, Tobirama left the encampment with twenty Uchiha men, each carrying meat, armed with bows and swords, each calling a different name. "This one is yours." The man handed him the paper to memorize. "Won't you call a name?" He simply shook his head, looked onward as if pain had hit him too hard."Ma-da-ra." Tobirama breathed, wondering about the oddness of the name on his tongue. The man took a deep breath and the boy wondered if 'Madara' must have been his son. Tobirama instantly remembered the warmth of the Uchiha home the night before, the four boys taking care of each other, their mother worn and tired.

Slowly, as they moved into the forest, spread out and shouting names, waving the meat in the air, wolves crept forward. Tobirama shook his head at each one, and meat was thrown to keep them at bay, the group circling around to find more. One or two wolves fell victim to their greed, only to be downed by four hunters at a time, and then hauled up for their fur and meat, back to the encampment. The rest seemed to be smarter than those, only circling the group as they moved. "This is becoming more dangerous." "Please we have to keep trying and you wanted to see the cabin. I can show you where it is." The older man huffed, wary of the whole situation, but nodded and they continued. Rounding a rocky slope and moving North, Tobirama picked up speed, crunching through the new snow and calling out loudly."Ma-da-ra!" He moved up the embankment, seeing the frozen waterfall and wondered, calling again. "Ma-da-ra!" "You're so loud!" A huff came from inside the cavern behind the ice and the boy's heart leapt. The man froze in his tracks, halting the hunting party. "Wolf! You're here!" A grunt, the sound of sliding and a soft bark of pain before the wolf emerged from the cavern, limping. "Yeah- What's the idea, kid?" It froze in it's tracks, seeing the hunter party and the wolves. "We were trying to find you." "That's obivious." He snarled.

"Madara." The old man breathed and the wolf's head jerked to look at him. The man nearly cried. "Madara." "Ma-da-ra." The wolf repeated, slowly moving to the pair, wondering why it sounded so familiar. Tobirama's eyes widened, seeing the change in the fur first, and tugging on the old man's sleeve. "Keep saying it!" "Madara, come home." He reached for the wolf and the closer he got, the fur began to fall away, his face contorting back to humanoid, paw reaching and slowly turning human. The old man grabbed the clawed hand and pulled him into his arms, kneeling in the snow, holding a now human teen wracked with scars. "My son." He cried, "Tell me you remember me." "I.. I think I do." The young man croaked, unsure of his limbs and wary of whats around him. Tobirama quickly pulled his cloak off to cover the naked boy. "The woman.. she... took me and I escaped...so.. I think she cursed me. I could never... go home." He seemed lost in his own memories but the old man only held him tighter, wiping is face and looking him over. "You're okay now. You can come home." With a grim realization, Tobirama followed them back.

-End-

#madatobi shenanigans #madatobi #madara uchiha #Tobirama Senju #red riding hood #fairytale rewrites

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raendown · 4 years

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Pairing: MadaraTobirama Word count: 5816 Chapter: 38/42 Summary: Not all wars are fought on the battlefield. Some are fought at the conference table, with whispers in the shadows, or even in the bedroom.

In a world where the Senju and Uchiha traditional lands were too far apart to have ever made them enemies, Butsuma and Tajima are the ones who come together and sign a treaty of peace. Madara isn’t happy to have his life signed away for him in a political marriage to strengthen the bond between their clans. He is even less happy to have Tobirama make assumptions of him from their very first night together. What follows from there is a journey of healing, of learning, and finding the places to belong in the places least expected.

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

KO-FI and commission info in the header!

Chapter 38

Watching Madara address the council was an exercise in patience. Not because he didn’t believe in what his husband was saying or even because he found listening to be difficult but rather because the confidence practically dripping from him was very attractive and Tobirama wanted nothing more than for this blasted meeting to end. He had a husband to violate in whichever empty room presented itself for his convenience first.

The Police Force Initiative truly was the right place for him here, a job where his passion for the people under his care shone through in such a way that no one could deny he believed in this village. Never had Tobirama loved his husband more than as he sat and watched him advocate for a larger budget just so he could serve better, protect better, provide for the men and women who would be under his command so he could give them the tools they needed to serve the citizens under their protection. It was like watching him slot in to place and flourish right before their eyes. Tobirama was captivated.

And happy. It may have taken a year or so but everything was finally coming around to how it should be - for all of them. Even Izuna looked more relaxed than ever where he sat farther down the table. Tobirama himself had been the one to suggest that he attend council meetings as the head of ANBU and therefore the crux of all information flowing in to the village. He’d let his brother-in-law think it was Tajima’s idea, though, happy to rely on the man’s ego and propensity for claiming every good idea was his own. At least in this instance it served to protect someone else’s ego for once.

“A pretty speech,” one of the minor clan Heads spoke out as Madara wound down. “But do you have the documentation to justify this proposed budget?”

“I do. If you would but open the dossier I handed out you would see that.” Unwilling to bend, Madara stared the other man down until he had no choice but to give in and open the packet that had indeed been given as soon as the subject was broached. Right there on the first page was a table of contents. And prominently listed in that table would be evidence to back up why Madara needed the money and where he would be getting it from.

Tobirama didn’t bother to smother the look of pride he could feel on his own face, undamped by the pressure headache that had been slowly mounting in his temples over the past hour. He hadn’t needed to offer many changes after Madara asked him to look the packet over. The work was good and it was all to his husband’s credit.

“Now, if the council would be good enough to indulge me a little farther, I’ve already spoken with the head of village security and Touka-san has agreed to a joint training program which I’d like to detail for you now.”

“What’s the point in training you both together?” A light scoff came from the Hyuga heir. “Wouldn’t that be more expensive?”

“Cheaper, actually, since we wouldn’t need to provide two dedicated training facilities.” Madara lifted his eyebrow but it was not a defensive expression, merely a judgmental once.

The young Hyuga folded his arms. “We already have many training grounds.”

“If my officers and the security teams work together we will have a better understanding of each other’s patrol routes, better response times, tighter protocol for who has jurisdiction over what, and also go fuck yourself.” Several people in the room covered their mouths, whether to gasp or snicker, but Madara only blew a bit of fringe away from his face. Clearly he was nearing the end of his already short fuse.

Butsuma stood up with the clear intention of bringing him to order but he was interrupted before a single word had time to pass his lips as the door burst open to admit three men, two of them panting and wild-eyed.

“An emergency!” the more put together man cried. “Danger!”

“What is the meaning of this?” Butsuma demanded.

“It’s coming! It’s coming our way! Straight for us!” One of the clearly exhausted men gave a shudder. “We’re all doomed…” And with that his eyes rolled back in his head, crumpling to the floor in a dead faint.

His companion did not waste time checking on him.

“We’re from the team that was sent to investigate the massive chakra presence. I-I know you won’t believe me. But I swear! It’s a tailed beast! A massive fox with nine tails and teeth as long as I am tall and it’s coming for us! It’s coming this way!”

“Someone tell me what the hell this idiot is blathering on about,” Tajima grumbled.

On his feet still, Madara's quiet voice was just loud enough to reach the whole room. “I thought the tailed beasts were just legends. They can’t be real.”

“They’re real,” the soldier moaned. “This one is. It’s massive! And it- oh god. Tetsuo…it ate Tetsuo…”

At last the stress of what he had seen appeared to catch up with him as well. He didn’t faint like his companion but he did waver, catching himself against the wall and sliding down until he could bury his face against his knees like a terrified child. Though Tobirama hated to leave anyone in such a state he understood that this was obviously a crisis on their hands. Psychological breaks could be dealt with later. Right now they needed to think about saving lives.

Unfortunately organizing themselves did not seem to be the first thing on either of their supposed leaders’ minds as it should have been. Butsuma and Tajima were both out of their seats but their eyes were locked in the sort of staring contest that generally prompted the rest of the council to simply sit back and wait out the proverbial dick measuring contest.

“It will take time to gather our forces,” Tajima murmured as if to himself.

“Such a beast cannot be allowed to simply enter the village unheeded,” Butsuma answered, finally something they agreed upon. “Time must be bought.” It was just too bad that what they agreed on was something utterly stupid.

“Consider it done. I myself will go; I will hold the beast at bay until our people can answer the call to arms.”

“You will not go alone.”

They stared each other down until Tobirama felt his temper snap. “This is not the time to worry about pride!”

“My son is correct. Now is the time for action. If you still have fight in you, Uchiha, then let me show you how hot my own fire burns. We take the beast on together.” Butsuma tilted his head in challenge, one his counterpart was only too ready to accept.

“Perhaps not the words I would have chosen,” Tajima said. “I go to protect my village. If you should happen to come along that is your choice.”

They moved towards the window at the same time with all the intention of men who would not be swayed from their paths and even Tobirama himself was startled to hear his own voice call out for Butsuma to wait. More surprised still when the man actually paused to look back at him. He wasn’t even truly sure why he’d done it. Knowing the danger descending upon them all, for the first time since he was a child Tobirama looked at the man across the room and saw his father. Not a good one, no, but the man who sired him all the same.

“Be safe,” was all he said.

He should have expected no less than the puzzled frown that was his only answer before Butsuma turned to leap after Tajima, unwilling to take even a moment for his own son in the face of allowing his rival to upstage him in any way. So much wasted breath. In their wake the room was silent but there was no time for that, someone needed to get these people moving.

“Alright,” Tobirama snapped, taking up the responsibility of leadership only because no one else had yet. “While they slow the beast we need to gather our forces. Izuna, you have your own people to organize and you know their skills best. Move fast, hit hard, and the rest of us will do what we can to keep the attention off of you. Shimura-sama, wake my cousin. Touka’s patrol teams can make a perimeter around the village as a last defense.” Both of them nodded and darted off.

“Won’t we need them on the field?” Hashirama asked. “We should throw everything we have at it!” Tobirama shook his head.

“Even if the fight doesn’t reach the village the debris or backlash of it might. This is supposed to be some legendary massive beast and the civilians cannot be left unprotected.”

“Right! You’re so smart, little brother!” His smile was sharper than usual, the adrenaline of an upcoming battle hardening his normally soft edges. A look he hadn’t worn since peace was made.

Tobirama let that pass; there were other things to concentrate on. “The InoShikaCho clans have extensive experience working together. All available bodies from those clans not enrolled in the ANBU or the patrol teams should be allowed to work as a unit. Do not concentrate on bringing the beast down. Try to slow him, stop his movement, control the field. Madara, you and Hashirama are our two strongest fighters and the Uchiha can move faster than most. I don’t mean to put our people in the line of danger–”

“We’re as ready to fight for our homes as anyone else.” His husband tossed a bit of fringe away from his face. “Attack, not defense?”

“The Uchiha have always been particularly good at burning whatever lies in their path,” Tobirama agreed with the shadow of a bloody smile. He was pleased to receive one in return.

“And the rest of us?” The Hatake clan heir looked ready to sink her teeth in to something already.

Tobirama opened his senses and winced at the sensation of the mass of brilliance bearing down on him. It was a miracle his latent sensing hadn’t felt it as more than a mounting headache, though he supposed that by now he’d grown used to living in the center of so many different signatures all piled on top of each other that a gradual increase simply hadn’t been all that noticeable.

“Support,” he said, a snap decision, wondering at how easily this room of leaders had decided to allow him to take control. “Fill in the spaces when you can. Remove any of the fallen if needed, escort the wounded to medical attention, and allocate a small team to prepare extra weaponry for standby. Hyuga-sama, instruct your people that defending their comrades is more important than attacking the beast. We will not win this battle if there are none left to fight it.”

In the distance something rumbled and Tobirama shuddered at the massive wave of chakra that rolled over them. The beast was angry.

“We are running out of time. Prepare for battle.”

The room scattered as each of them rushed towards their weapons and armor. Fighting in their casual daily outfits could only accomplish so much no matter that each of them surely kept some kind of blade on them at all times. Butsuma and Tajima had promised to buy them time; they would be fools not to use it.

Without a word Tobirama snagged his husband’s arm and reached for one of the markers he had set up around their home. Almost before they had finished shifting through space he was moving, reaching for the stand where his armor sat waiting after its latest repairs. He got one hand on it and then scowled as he was forcibly turned around, irritated to be stopped, ready to tell the other man off for interrupting him. Annoyance melted away as he was pulled down in to a fierce kiss.

“You will be careful,” Madara snarled in his face. “I will not sit by your bedside and pray for your life again. Don’t you dare do that to me.”

“I expect you to do the same,” he said quietly.

“Obviously. If that dumb monster so much as thinks of hurting even a hair on your head I will rip its bloody heart out. Twice you’ve been hospitalized in one year! I refuse to see it happen again!” Still grumbling under his breath, he released his iron grip and stomped over to pull his own armor off its stand.

Tobirama watched him with a full heart. “At least you did not need to sit with me through the second time.”

“Yes, because leaving you in Izuna’s care will always turns out well!”

After that they garbed themselves for war in silence. Strapping himself in to his armor felt to Tobirama almost the same as strapping another persona on to his skin. Here in their home it was sometimes hard to believe the soft and openly loving husband he had become but those feelings had no place in battle. Though it caused him something akin to physical pain he boxed those parts of himself away and firmly closed the lid on them, tucked away to leave his concentration free for observation and strategy, the sort of clear thinking that would keep him alive to come home where he could open that box again.

If there was one silver lining to this situation it would be the chance to see Madara in all his glory once again, a veritable god of war in blood red armor and that distinctive gunbai strapped to his back.

“Let’s go,” he murmured. They had no more time to waste on soft words or meaningless compliments. As they dashed out in to the frigid temperatures outside and took to the rooftops Tobirama promised himself that later he would spend hours describing for his husband just how incredible he looked with that fierce expression – then he very carefully shoved that in to the box as well and locked it shut.

Just past the edge of where the village wall was still being upgraded they crossed paths with Izuna, directing his ANBU with last minute instructions.

“You know what we really need?” he called as they passed him by, breath misting in the air. “A fucking alarm. A village-wide alarm system so we don’t have to go running around like chickens gathering everyone up if this shit happens again.”

“That…is a good idea,” Tobirama admitted.

Izuna stared at him.

“Why don’t you give that some more thought and if we both survive we can hash out some ideas later.” When he turned he managed to catch just the edge of a thoughtful look on the man’s face as they continued on their way and leaped out of sight.

Figuring out what direction to go wasn’t hard. Even without the sounds of destruction and the clouds of dust and smoke rising slowly from the forest there was the oppressive weight of that chakra signature, close enough now that even the most insensitive shinobi would be able to feel it there, hovering at the edge of their mind like a wild animal dragging sharp teeth along their consciousness. It was not a pleasant feeling.

Tobirama and Madara kept speed with each other as they darted through the trees, matching step for step and weaving through the branches in perfect unison. Battle had called them and they had answered. All of Tobirama’s instincts cried out for him to strategize and make plans but he recognized that it was useless until he was able to see the situation for himself. He’d never fought a tailed beast before let alone the Kyuubi itself, the strongest of the nine. Trying to plan for something like that was like trying to plan for the path of a tornado; there was simply no predicting what would happen until it did.

Much easier was determining that they were getting close. As soon as they began to encounter long swaths of forest crushed or burnt they increased their speed. Tobirama pushed through the discomfort of that massive signature to find the cool green feeling of his brother and directed them that way. Shinobi of their power served best at the front no matter the danger they faced.

Seeing the beast for the first time nearly stopped them both in their tracks, however. It didn’t matter how brave a man was, seeing a creature several stories taller than the administration tower would have been a sight all on its own. The oppressive weight of the thing’s hatred was something else entirely.

“We have to fight that,” Madara breathed, his voice only just audible over the commotion around them.

“No,” Tobirama said. “We have to stop it. Let’s go.”

Several bodies lay still in scattered places throughout the carnage, others darting in to carry them away, but Tobirama’s eyes found several directly beneath the feet of the Kyuubi where they could not be safely retrieved. He dismissed them. Later he would mourn the loss of life. Right now he would do what he could to protect the living.

Hashirama fell back to meet them as they approached and Tobirama felt his heart clench at the sight of tears streaming down the man’s face.

“Are you injured?” he demanded. Hashirama shook his head.

“Later,” he choked out. “We have to put this thing down before it takes more.”

“Right. Then let’s do that.”

One quick survey told him that the people of the village were indeed following the strategy he had quickly laid out. To one side Nara cast their shadows to snare legs and tails, Yamanaka threw their own consciousness’ out in an attempt to take over the beast’s, and the Akimichi stood over them both with their bodies expanded to massive sizes, deflecting the lashing tails and protecting their friends.

Hatake and Inuzuka harried the flanks while several Aburame attempted to guide their insects in to any orifice they could use for an inside take down. Uchiha sent flames from the front in brilliant displays while Senju used the earth and the river to push and pull, attacking, attempting to knock the thing off balance. The Hyuga clan were spread through the rest of them, each paired up with another shinobi and moving in tandem as though this battle were a well-practiced dance. Directing attacks to the targets with the most deadly potential, rotating or using their Byakugan to deflect incoming debris, they made the perfect support for anyone lucky enough to work with them.

Just watching their village come together in such a way was enough to make a man burst with pride and yet for all their efforts they made very little progress. Bodies fell and others dashed in to remove them. Screams and thunder rent the air in a near constant litany of destruction.

“I’ll take its head,” Hashirama declared, legs coiling in readiness.

“The back,” Madara claimed. “Watch me tame that fucker.”

“Hold,” Tobirama snapped.

Amazingly enough, they did as he asked, holding until suddenly waves of ANBU burst from the trees in a concentrated attack. Then Tobirama ducked his head to bare his teeth.

“Now, while it’s distracted!”

Hashirama burst forward with his hands already forming signs. Spires of mokuton burst from the ground at his command to reach for the beast’s face and muzzle its jaw. Deep in its throat the Kyuubi snarled – then he screamed with rage and pain as Madara hit him from behind with the largest Grand Fireball the field had seen yet that day.

Letting the two of them work ahead as a distraction, Tobirama scattered kunai marked with his special seal. As soon as he had the layout of the terrain solid in his mind he reached for one and appeared directly under the belly of the rampaging animal. With so much water already scattered about it was the work of a moment to gather a large puddle and swing his arms upwards to slice at the soft flesh above his head, an attack that he hoped was doubly painful with the temperature of the water only barely above freezing. He was gone before the answering scream was finished and gathering more water to go for the hamstrings.

Before he could get close enough a great roar shook the earth and destabilized his footing as the Kyuubi broke through its wooden muzzle, snapping at the branches that reached to capture it again. Tobirama flashed to his brother’s side and pulled him out of the way just in time for one of the many tails to come crashing down where he’d just been standing.

“Thanks for the save,” Hashirama cried. “Let’s try this on for size!”

Only once had Tobirama even seen him use that massive scroll he carried in to battle but it was a testament to how seriously his brother was taking this fight when he threw it down and unrolled it, slamming his palm in to the center. When his summon appeared it carried them both up on its shoulders to tower over the forest and draw their opponent’s attention all to themselves. The Kyuubi didn’t look terribly impressed to see the Several Thousand Hands but Madara clearly was – and just as clearly did not intend to be left behind.

“You think that’s something? I am the one you should be worried about, fox!” His voice came from the ground a moment before he was raised up above it in the headpiece of a fully formed Susano’o.

“Together, my friend?” Hashirama called to him.

“Eat my chakra dust!” Madara hollered back.

Despite his words they moved in sync as only the best of battle partners could. Tobirama spared a moment to roll his eyes at their antics even as he cast one of his kunai and followed it through the air, summoning the river to his purpose.

With their strength combined and aid from all the other clans the amount of injuries dropped significantly, though the battle was still a hard one. The tide was turned with the arrival of Mito, her usual orderly outfit replaced with the minimalistic battle gear of a true Uzushio warrior. With delicate grace she evaded the reached claws attempting to crush her spine and wove between the hundreds of wooden fists slicing through the air to land at her husband’s side. Tobirama appeared at his other a moment later.

“I can seal him,” she announced confidently. “But nothing inanimate will be able to hold that much energy. If I seal him it will be in to a living creature. A person.”

“Any volunteers?” Tobirama asked dryly.

“That sounds incredibly dangerous.” Deftly weaving his signs still, Hashirama kept the beast distracted with his summons while they spoke. “Would his chakra not tear the person to shreds?”

Mito shook her head. “No. This is why I did not come until now; I have been modifying the seal we use to make storage scrolls and I believe that it should contain him so long as there is another chakra to give the array power. Their life will be the safeguard that holds him.”

“I will do it,” Hashirama declared. He looked determined until she laid her hand on his arm.

“No, it cannot be you. The head of one clan with so much power would unbalance the rest. I believe it should be me. It would be dangerous for whoever takes this responsibility to leave the village and I hardly do so already.”

“Make a decision,” Tobirama snapped. “We don’t have time to sit around and chat it over all day. Yes or no, Anija!”

“May the kami forgive me. Yes. Do it – and fast.”

She gave one sharp nod and then Mito turned towards the Kyuubi with fire in her eyes the likes of which few had seen and lived to speak of. With barely a thought Tobirama was away at his own husband’s side, suspended within the Susano’o.

“On my mark be loud. As much of a distraction as you can be. Draw its attention and hold it.”

“Understood.”

Tobirama trained his eyes across the shifting mass of fur between him and his brother, watching until Mito’s tiny form shot forward.

“Now!”

Purple flame exploded outwards in a Grand Fireball nearly the size of the Kyuubi’s head, singing fur and flesh and drawing a scream that must have shaken the mountains from one side of the continent to the other. Several of the men and women scattered below dropped to clap their hands over their ears even as Mito, brave and beautiful Mito, flung her body straight towards the source. For a single moment she existed as a streak of flame across the sky, red hair spilling behind her like a banner as her traditional buns unraveled with the force of such a violent movement.

Then the motion ended as she impacted the beast’s hide palm first, black ink spidering out from underneath her touch. Even the trees themselves quaked with the force of the roar this time, the sound of an animal who knew it was about to be caged. Seeing his chance, Hashirama moved quickly to pin the lashing tails with bands of wood, holding them down for the howls to carry on in stillness.

When the massive form began to ripple and waver Tobirama almost felt a touch of pity for the thing. To be caged for the rest of his life was something he couldn’t imagine. But the feeling was easy to brush away as he looked out at the carnage surrounding them, steeling his heart to the vision of the Nine-Tailed Beast shrinking in size as it was pulled in to Mito’s body. For such a momentous act Tobirama felt almost let down by the anticlimactic silence when it was over.

Mito stood where the Kyuubi had, tall and proud. Then even from a distance Tobirama could see her tremble before she crumpled to the earth like a doll. Hashirama was by her side almost as fast as though he too was able to utilize the hiraishin.

Concern warred with the instinct to give the two of them some space and Tobirama married the two urges by asking Madara to dismiss his Susano’o, taking the time to walk across the clearing by the power of his own legs rather than flashing across with the marker Hashirama carried. When they arrived his hands were already limned in green chakra and his brows pulled together with deep concentration. Thankfully for their sanity he did not look too worried.

“She doesn’t appear to be injured,” he announced as they and several others drew close. “I think the shock of absorbing so much extra chakra was just a little too hard and her mind shut down to protect her until she finds a balance.”

“Are you alright?” Tobirama asked. His brother looked up at him with a wan expression.

“I’m…uninjured.”

With a nod Tobirama turned to Madara, gently cupping that precious face with one hand.

“Don’t look at me like that, I’m fine too,” the man growled. He did not, however, pull away from the touch. They held each other’s eyes for a moment of understanding before Tobirama turned back to the pair on the ground.

“Uninjured is fine but that wasn’t my question. You looked distraught when we arrived.”

“Of course I’m distraught! Look around you!”

The outburst was so unlike the Hashirama that others knew and shock was plain to see on many of the faces around them. For Tobirama, however, it brought him nothing but a clench in his chest. It may have been years since he heard that tone but he would have remembered the heartbreak it carried until the end of his days. The last he’d heard it they had stood over a fresh grave after burying their mother between the bodies of their younger siblings.

“You know better than most than many injuries can look much worse than they truly are,” he murmured. Squatting down, he laid a hand on the other’s shoulder. “I know it seems as though we lost many lives today but until we get a tally from the medics we can’t know that for sure. Many more could have survived.”

Hashirama lifted his face to show that tears once more streamed over his cheeks. “But they didn’t. They’re gone. He’s gone.”

“Who is?”

“Father,” Hashirama whispered.

A great empty nothingness seemed to echo in Tobirama’s chest as he followed his brother’s line of sight down the path to where the Kyuubi must have met with the first line of resistance. Miles away at this point, he wasn’t able to see where the body of his father lay. He didn’t care to. What state the flesh was in mattered little if the mind had gone cold.

He waited for the pain. For the sense of loss. The last time he had seen Butsuma’s face it struck him for the first time in years that they were family – not a happy one, perhaps, but blood all the same. Now the man was gone and with him any chance that they might someday recover the relationship that had never had a proper chance to grow. And Tobirama, to his small secret shame, felt nothing.

“I am sorry for your loss,” he said at last, an empty platitude to fill the silence as his brother continued to stare up at him expectantly. Hashirama didn’t look surprised but neither did he look at all comforted.

“What are we going to do?”

“Get these people back home, I imagine.” That particular wisdom came from Izuna as the man approached. “I’ve instructed my teams to search the area and retrieve any dead or wounded left behind. They took too bloody long waiting for the right moment to make an attack and I’m not happy with their performance. So now since they didn’t actually see much battle they get to enjoy the clean up afterwards.”

“Right. Touka can have any of her people who have a talent for earth jutsu restore the forest as best they can until Hashirama is able to see to the trees.” Tobirama nodded to his brother-in-law, unsurprised by the hesitation before Izuna nodded back.

Between them, Madara craned his neck to peer down the alley of destruction where Butsuma supposedly lay. It didn’t take a genius to guess where his thoughts were drifting. Neither of their first responders had been seen since they dashed off, their blood running hot with reckless competition. If Butsuma had gone to his final rest here in the forest then chances were Tajima had too. Tobirama waited but his husband said nothing, turning his head away with a telling tension at the corners of his eyes. No one present saw fit to mention it.

“Izu is right,” he muttered. “Let’s get these people back to the village. We’ll need to gather the council for a debrief. Shit, wait, Izuna can you also send one of your people to find the rest of that team who came to warn us? There wasn’t time to ask but–”

“We need to know why,” Tobirama finished for him.

“On it.” Just like that the man was off again.

Hashirama used the utmost care as he cradled his wife between both arms and lifted her, for once not looking around to see to others before taking off towards safety himself. Although the greater good often took priority over many things in his eyes there were few if any things in this world that could possibly be more important to him than the safety of his beloved wife. Tobirama watched them go and thought to himself that once he had envied their bond. How funny it was to think of it now and realize that he had the same.

Urging his own beloved to go ahead, Tobirama stayed to organize those wandering around the field looking lost, some of them bearing the frantic expression of those who had lost sight of their loved ones. He urged them to allow the allotted team to comb through the area before descending in to panic. Many injured had already been taken to the hospital and extra bodies milling about would only impede the progress of others reaching the same help.

At a certain point he had to realize that he was mostly killing time, putting off the inevitable as though hoping that the council would meet without him. Unfortunately he knew the one they would not start without was Hashirama and since he would have taken the time to ensure his wife was more than comfortable in the proper care it wasn’t likely the debrief would have even started yet. Not to mention the fact that Madara was likely to glare the lot of them in to submission if they tried to go ahead without Tobirama’s sizable brain there to point out the angles no one else ever seemed able to see.

Knowing it would be better to get this over with did nothing to make him feel any more enthusiastic but still Tobirama forced himself to turn back towards the village when there was only petty busywork left to occupy himself with. The meeting needed to happen. As a council they needed to make a decision on how to react to these events and how to proceed now that their two nominal ‘leaders’ had both fallen. Yet something in the back of his mind couldn’t help pretending that if he never went to the meeting then he would never have to admit that all of this was real.

Clearly he’d been spending too much time in Hashirama's presence for such childish notions to have any hold over him.

What drove him forward despite his distaste for it all was the same urge which had driven plenty of his most self-destructive urges in the past: his need to know. The need for answers that had a tendency to blot out the rest of the world. Tobirama set his feet towards the village center and he would have damned his own curiosity if he wasn’t so achingly aware that he would have eventually gone anyway.

Duty had been bred in to him at a young age, pressed in to his skin so deeply it could almost be considered a personality trait on its own at this point. He might drag his feet and put it off but in the end this was his home and he would do what he needed to for this village. That was his duty and Tobirama had long accepted that he was nothing if not a dutiful man.

To his husband. To his family. To his people.

#rae writes #madatobi #madara #tobirama #hashirama #tajima #butsuma #izuna #mito #fanfiction

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takerfoxx · 4 years

Text

Um...

Right. Okay, so here we have the finale of season one, and with the announcement that we are indeed getting a second cour (ha! Called it!), they wisely did not wrap anything up but instead cranked up the momentum, ending things on a literal cliffhanger.

So...huh.

Now, there are two principle points I’d like to focus on here. And the first ought to be obvious.

=ahem-

SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY!

MAIN EVENT OF THE MAGICAL GIRL BRAWL! WE HAVE KNIGHT OF JUSTICE SAYAKA MIKI TAKING ON HOLY SHARPSHOOTER MAMI TOMOE, IN HER SECOND EVER TITLE DEFENSE! KOUHAI VS. SEMPAI! STUDENT VS. MENTOR! WILL THE IMMOVABLE OBJECT BE ABLE TO TOPPLE THE IRRESISTIBLE FORCE, OR HAS SAYAKA BROUGHT A KNIFE TO A GUN FIGHT? FIND OUT, ONLY ON PPV!

Yeah, okay, that happened. The third ever one-on-one fight between two of the classic megucas, and this one involved BEST GIRL Sayaka Miki, whom I’ve been waiting desperately for.

I mean, Sayaka vs. Mami! Can you get any more hype than that?

So...why was I not as hype as I ought to have been?

Well, the answer to that is simple. It’s because somebody got really excited after seeing the fight and decided to post spoilers all over social media before I could see the episode, spoiling Sayaka’s big entrance and the fact that she fights Mami for me! I mean, she even opened with her signature fire extinguisher spot! I would’ve flipped my shit!

See, this is why I use the spoiler break! So I don’t do that to someone else!

But all griping aside, the fight really was amazing. Sayaka gets unfairly dismissed as the scrub of the group, mainly due to her getting absolutely trounced by Kyoko in their 1v1 and later succumbing to despair, but let’s face it: she was a rookie, one with no real training, made to find her own way while being compared to veterans like Kyoko and Mami, Homura the cheatspammer, and Madoka’s sheer unnatural potential. Sure, she powerleveled in Rebellion Story, but that was due to supernatural means.

Well, I mean, more supernatural than usual.

Here, we get to see what would have happened had Mami survived to train Sayaka properly, if Sayaka got some actual experience and learned to use her abilities.

And she kind of kicks ass.

I mean, my girl straight up tanks a Tiro Finale, even going so far as getting her own arm blown off in what was probably the franchise’s goriest scene yet, and simply snatched her own hand out of midair with her regenerating arm! She went head-on with superpowered Mami Doppel (I think?) and held her own?

I mean, it didn’t last, because superpowered Mami Doppel, but she still made a good showing of herself. Which leads to Iroha summing her Doppel (of course) and...Yachiyo summoning hers, because apparently she could always do that? And...um...

Yachiyo. Dude.

I’m sorry, but that whole...scorpion thing they were going for might have worked as a full witch, but with Yachiyo’s head sticking out the front with her on all fours just looked really, really stupid. Like, distractingly stupid.

So anyway, them working together manages to be enough to bring down Mami (whom apparently has transformed into an Uwasa by this point?!), but the whole museum comes crashing down and Iroha is dragged away by Mami, who by this point is quite coocoo, as is her wont.

So yeah. Awesome fight. Interested to see if Sayaka sticks around to help Yachiyo, and if we’re getting more of Kyoko. I presume Madoka and Homura make their debut next season.

So...now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s talk about the thing I’ve been puzzling over for a while now.

We see Touka give her big Hitler-esque speech with the WoM gathered below her in their cult robes. Rena’s not having it and tries to leave, but gets blocked off by the others. And apparently Yui, Felicia, and Sana are either up to something and trying to blend in, or they’ve decided to say fuck it and join up. And apparently Kuroe is there too! Wonder where she’s been.

But anyway, here’s what’s got me all twisted up.

We’re clearly not meant to like the WoM. Alina’s a psycho, Touka’s got that empty-eye grin that’s used to denote villains, their acolytes wear cult robes, Touka’s speech was clearly meant to evoke Nazi Germany, they’ve brainwashed one of the OG’s, everything about how they act and how they’re framed is meant to portray them as the bad guys.

Except...pretty much everything in Touka’s speech was...right? Like, completely? Everything she said about being victims of the Incubators’ scam is exactly what the fans have been saying for years. And she genuinely did find a way out of it, a way to channel negative energy into a temporary witch form without becoming a full witch. She stopped the wish/witch cycle dead! That’s amazing!

So what’s the catch? Why are they the bad guys? I mean, ditch the robes and give the leaders’ an attitude adjustment, and I don’t see how they could be.

Well, I have some theories about that. Of course there is a catch, because this is still PMMM, and I would bet my left arm that it has to do with the Uwasas. We never did get an explanation as to what they were for, but given that their whole purpose is to lure people in, I’d say that they’re the ones providing the necessary fuel for the Doppel system to work. I recall Touka saying something to that effect during her speech, so probably in order to save themselves, the WoM need to prey upon normal humans, harvesting their emotional energy the same way the Incubators harvested that of magical girls? I mean, hell, a lot of what Touka has said has made me believe that she’s kind of a magical girl supremacist, one who sees it as their right to lord over normal people.

Plus, apparently the weird writing when Mami went ham noted her as actually having become an Uwasa (or so I’m told), so what if that’s what Uwasa are? What if they really are kind of witches, ones created from WoM members? Which would also make Touka a bit of hypocrite.

Also, Walpurgisnacht is fucking coming. Fuck.

So that was the first season of Magia Record, something I went into with plenty of reservations but did eventually get won over by! I mean, I didn’t love it, and still consider it the weakest of the three shows I watched this season, but I still liked it a lot, flaws and all. Solid 7.5 out of 10, and hopefully season two will ramp things up, now that all the gang is established the plot is finally moving.

And that new ED was dope.

#puella magi madoka magica #pmmm #magia record #yachiyo nanami #iroha tamaki #touka #alina grey #sayaka miki #mami tomoe #reaction

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dreamerfae · 4 years

Text

Androphobia

Summary: Touka met with an unfortunate incident when she was young, which lead to her having an uncured androphobia till today. When her boss told her to get it fixed or get fired, she knew she had to face her phobia head-on. It resulted in her going to the hospital, where she met a handsome doctor named Kaneki who was in-charge of curing her.

Word Count: 9005

Rating: Teens and Up

Genre: Alternate Universe

Notes: Androphobia - a fear of males. She is currently a working adult in a company. The doctor is black-haired Kaneki but in adult form (not reaper Ken).

—

"Isn't that bad!?" Yoriko exclaimed, and Touka had to close her hand over her friend's mouth to keep the news from spreading.

The female sighed. "Yeah. I'll get fired if I don't get my androphobia settled down within 6 months. Boss says it's affecting my work performance and everyone else's as well..."

"What are you going to do?"

"I don't know... I don't want to go to a doctor... they cost lots of money and what if it's a guy? It'll be even harder to recover."

Yoriko squeezed her friend's hands. "You have to do it! Even if the doctor is a guy! You never know—he might be your future boyfriend and husband!!! Are you going to let your phobia affect your work and your relationship status?!"

Touka rolled her eyes. "If I didn't know you better, I would think you're insulting me. Seeing as we've been friends since high school, I will take it as you're not."

She remained silent to think about what Yoriko had said. As a young girl, she always wanted to meet a handsome prince and have a family with him someday. But after that incident, she changed and never got close to men ever again.

If she were to overcome her phobia, she would be able to fulfill her childhood dream. As it stands, her phobia was affecting everything and everyone in her life. Her family, her friends, her work performance etc. At this rate, she was going to be fired from the only company that allowed her to work here despite her phobia and she couldn't let that happen.

"Alright. I'll go see a doctor."

A wide grin appeared on Yoriko's face. "Great! I'll introduce you to a good hospital!!"

Standing in front of a therapist's hospital room, Touka took a deep breath and hoped for the best. She knocked and entered, only to freeze in her tracks when she saw that the doctor was a male, even though she had specifically requested for a female. Her heart stopped, palms sweat and stomach churned.

The black-haired male doctor looked up from his documents and smiled at her. "Good afternoon, Ms Kirishima. I am Doctor Kaneki and I will be in charge of you on your path in treating your phobia. Do take a seat." He gestured to the chair in front of him.

Kaneki stared at her documents then had realization dawn upon him the reason why she never moved from her spot. "Right, you have androphobia. Sorry, I wasn't aware that it was this serious." He stood up, startling her and attempted to push the chair over to her. She caught it, pulled it to the furthest area of the room—the corner, furthest from him—and sat. Then, she turned her head to face the wall, not wanting to even look at him.

"If it'll help you relax, let's talk like this--"

"I thought I requested a female doctor." She cut in.

Clasping his hands together, he was unfazed by her interruption and rudeness and remained friendly. "Despite your request, I took on your case, thinking that it might be more effective for your phobia to be treated by me, seeing as I'm a male. Don't worry, your case is not uncommon. It can be treated, with time and patience."

"I don't think it's possible for me to get treated if I have a doctor who is male--an object of my fear in the same room as me and talking to me."

"We can do this and I assure you that I'm one of the best doctors in therapy."

With no further objections from her, Kaneki stood up. Her jaw clenched when she heard him do so from the scratching sound of the chair against the floor.

"I'm going to confirm the seriousness of your condition now so I can come up with your treatment. If you are uncomfortable about anything, let me know."

He took a step towards her. She didn't move from her spot. Another step. She shot up from her chair and had her hand on the doorknob immediately, wanting to leave the room. He stepped backward, she didn't open the door.

Noting down how the minimum distance he needs to keep from her was about 6 steps, he then asked, "Do you look guys in the eyes when you speak to them?"

"I do not."

"How do you feel if you talk to men?"

"Like I rather die than talk to them. "

He decided that the first thing he had to fix was to make her look at him when they talked. It would definitely kick start things.

"Right. Let's work on your eye contact first. What do you like? Animals? Food? Color? Tell me anything."

"..rabbits."

Kaneki hummed in response as he began typing on his computer. Soon, many different pictures of rabbits came out of the printer and he grabbed them. Sliding one to her feet, he watched her gaze at the wall switch to the picture of the cute rabbit and she smiled.

He then slid another picture to her, this one further from her, but nearer to him. As he hoped, she looked at it.

He continued doing so with other pictures until he finally held one picture above his head, where she did look at the picture though avoiding his eye contact. Slowly pulling the photo down, their eyes finally locked when the photo was positioned just below his eyes.

She held her gaze into his eyes for only a few seconds before looking away.

That's an improvement, he thought and he used blue tack to stick one photo on the cabinet behind him, just above him. She followed it and then, he had her looking directly at him. Though her eyes were only on the picture, it was better than having her speak to him whilst her gaze was on the wall or the floor each time.

A reward would be next.

"If you look into my eyes at another 2 times today, I will give you a rabbit item. I will increase the number of times I need you to look at me by every session and your prize will be better than the last."

"You're trying to bribe me."

Kaneki chuckled. "Don't put it in that way. It's called a reward system."

Touka walked out of that 2-hour session with a rabbit pencil that day.

The next session focused on allowing her to look at photos of men. So Kaneki printed out different pictures of men; from young to old and showed it to her. The young went first.

"Tell me which you don't like the most."

A picture of a young boy around age 5. She managed to look at it without being afraid.

A picture of a boy around 17 years old. Her lips trembled and body shivered. But she could still look at the photo without turning away.

A picture of a 30-year-old guy. One look at it and she stood up, turning to leave the room.

"Wait, don't leave. I'll put the picture down."

She sat back down onto her chair and watched as he put the paper into the shredder machine before heaving a sigh of relief. More photos were shown after that but the biggest reaction she had was for men around the age of 30-40 years old.

"Kirishima-San, look at me."

Touka does as she's told.

"Similar to the photo of the 30-year-old guy you hate, I'm also 30 years old."

Hearing that alarmed her but she clenched her hands into fists and forced herself to continue looking at him.

He smiled, making her relax a little.

"Good job on not looking away from me. Why don't you tell me what happened? Most people with phobias have had something bad happen to them to cause the phobia they have now. I would like to know yours so I can better treat you."

To explain the horrible experience she had in words felt like she was going to relive the whole thing again and she didn't want to. She squeezed her eyes shut with regret and bit her lower lip. "I'm sorry, I'm not ready to tell you."

"No problem. I will wait until you're ready."

It's been 2 months since Touka started therapy with this doctor and after meeting once for 2 hours every week, they've built up some kind of friendship between them.

In times when she's uncomfortable or unable to continue with the treatment, Doctor Kaneki wouldn't force her and instead talked to her. The topics of conversation range from hobbies, work, news, trends, favorite food, and drinks, etc.

She found that it wasn't because he didn't bother to continue the treatment but it's a way to allow her to relax and not feel threatened by him as a male—the object of her fear.

Which, she admits, is a clever plan. Getting her to let her guard down through conversations is working and she doesn't feel as apprehensive towards him as compared to day 1.

Now, she's able to at least look him in the eye when they talk and sit a little closer to him. As he mentioned, the first time they met, they were 6 steps apart. Now she was 3 steps away from him—halfway there and she felt so proud of herself for doing that.

She had left this sickness of hers untreated for the past 10 years and it only took this doctor 2 months to partially heal her. He was capable, she'd give him that.

And friendly,

And handsome—

She choked. How had thoughts of her sickness become thoughts of him being handsome?!

Cheeks burning, she cupped them to cool them down and buried her face into her hands. She shook her head. The reason why she found him handsome and nice and friendly was due to her talking to him—who's the first male she has talked to, met eye contact and seen in a decade.

It's probably because she's been having her head down and gaze to the floor whenever she was around males. Yeah, that's just probably the case. She was not in love with him.

—

Writing down notes in his book, Kaneki stared at Touka's notes and smiled at the remembrance of the previous day where she looked so happy to receive a rabbit plush toy. Out of all the patients, she's the one that he enjoyed treating and being with the most.

As a doctor, to see her fast progress in treatment was great because that's what he's here for: to treat people. But there's one other thing that made him happy was the determination and perseverance she showed in her treatment.

Sure, she was a tough patient to treat for her type of phobia but it was the progress that made everything worthwhile—as well as the smile that he put on her face at the end of the day when she received a reward from him.

She glowed—shined—he couldn't find a word for it—but he found her beautiful when she smiled. It's been a long time since he's met a female who made his heart beat fast. The last time he had seen that kind of smile that made his heart race was from his ex-girlfriend, 3 years ago.

A frown replaced the smile on his face and he had to remind himself once again to not fall in love. He has maintained it that way for 3 years and he will continue to do so in the future.

—

Staring down at his notes, Kaneki didn't notice Touka enter the room and already sat on the chair waiting for him.

"Doctor Kaneki!"

He snapped out of his thoughts and directed his attention to her. "I'm sorry. I was lost in thoughts."

"Are you okay?" Touka looked worriedly at him and he smiled.

He felt his hand brush his chin and smiled nervously. "I'm fine. Let's start our session for today."

Touka hesitated, then put a hand over his. "Y-you can tell me anything. I'm here to listen."

The male felt touched by her gesture. Despite her phobia, she forced herself to touch him and offered her help. "Thank you." He looked down. "Today's actually my girlfriend's 3rd year death anniversary. I was planning to visit her grave after our session."

She remained silent at his confession. What was she supposed to say in this situation? She had wanted to help him when he seemed so sad in his thoughts. But now that he really told her, she didn't know what to do and she wasn't responsible for whatever came out of her mouth next.

"What was she like? Your ex-girlfriend."

One end of his lips quirked at the memory.

"She was always laughing. She was outgoing. She was gentle. She was my everything and I wanted to eventually marry her and have a family with her." He seemed so happy as he remembered about her, then his mood suddenly dropped.

"She suffered depression from being bullied at her workplace and despite being a doctor—" he exhaled a shaky breath. "I couldn't save her and she committed suicide by throwing herself from a building."

He tried to control his voice from wavering and his tears from coming out.

Touka's lips trembled and her heart ached for him. It must have been so painful to have a loved one die without being able to save them. Every time they talked, he would have light in his eyes but now, his eyes looked sorrowful and dead. She did not like that. Not one bit.

Without thinking, she was out of her chair and had his head in her chest, arms wrapping around him. She froze when his arms encircled her torso and he shed tears into her chest.

They separated, with her plopping down onto her chair, staring into space and asking herself what had possessed her to hug him—her object of fear. Was it the waver in his voice? Was it the tears brimming in his eyes, threatening to fall? Was it the forced smile he put as if to pretended everything was fine?

Or was it because it upset her to see him upset?

Before she could answer her own question, he wiped his tears away and smiled. "Thank you for listening to me. I appreciate it. That's embarrassing. I'm supposed to be listening to your problems and you ended up listening to mine." He chuckled.

She shook her head. "It's okay. It's the least I can do when you're helping me so much."

"It's my job. Don't worry about it."

And somehow Touka wished he cared about her not because it was his job, but because it was her.

—

One of Kaneki's legs shook and his fingers drummed on the table as he awaited Touka's arrival for their appointment. These days, he has been looking forward to their appointments earnestly, and it always made his day better when he saw her progress with his own eyes.

But after that day where she comforted him by hugging him to her chest, it gave him mixed feelings. He had since then begun to notice some things about her. How her perfume smelt of roses, how her bag hung the rabbit keychain he gave her, how her smile reached her mesmerizing ocean-blue eyes and many more.

..Was he starting to see her not as just a patient, but as a woman?

He shook his head. It was probably his own imagination. It was just his excitement in her improvement of phobia treatment.

Despite believing so, his heart leaped when he heard the familiar ring of her bell keychain as she entered his room and settled down on the chair in front of him. "Good afternoon, Doctor Kaneki."

The scent of coffee lingered in the air as he watched her put a cup of Coffee Bean's coffee on his table. He eyed it, then looked to her with a puzzled expression, confused.

"I bought this for you. I noticed you always drink this in the afternoon. I-if you already drank one, it's okay. I'll just drink it myself."

Maybe it was his imagination but her cheeks turned pink at one point.

Kaneki took a sip and smiled. "Thank you. I forgot to buy it today so I'm really thankful you got for me."

She bowed her head and he caught her smiling before she quickly hid it. She's cute, he thought.

"Well then, let's start with our session for today. Up until now, you've achieved many things. You are able to make eye contact with me, talk to me, sit near to me and look at me without shrinking away. You've done a really good job of persevering. Now, I need you to work even harder because the next thing I need you to fix is physical touch."

He paused because she froze.

"I understand this might be hard for you as it is the final step of your treatment so do let me know your thoughts of an arrangement I'm about to propose to you. I will respect your wishes if you don't wish to go through with it."

"W-what is it?" Touka asked, voice wavering.

"The first way is for you to have a male of your choice and proceed to have a relationship with him where you can experience the physical touches done in a relationship. I can then instruct him on how to treat you. The second way is for you to have a relationship with me. The third way is we do not fix this 'physical touch' aspect of your phobia at all."

The thought of another man touching her made him feel sick to the core. "I would rather you not choose the third way because as a doctor, I want to see you treated. As for the second way--" his throat suddenly felt dry and he swallowed.

"It would probably be deemed as sexual harassment if I were to touch you as a doctor but if I were in a relationship with you, it wouldn't cause many problems since couples often, ahem, touch one another."

Silence filled the room and Kaneki coughed to fill in the awkwardness. He can't help but be distracted by the way she bit her lower lip when she was focused on the choices he gave her. In his mind, he wondered how her lips would taste like. Soft as they looked? Wet from her lip balm? Or sweet like the sweet drinks she often drank?

He shook his head, mind reeling from the perverse thoughts he had. He was a man and remaining without a girlfriend for 3 years now made him all weird in the head.

"I choose option 2."

Despite being happy deep down that she chose him, he had to make sure she was comfortable with it. "Are you sure? I don't want to force you into anything. If you wish to not cure that part, I understand."

Touka shrugged. "I don't know any other guys and I feel most comfortable with you, so why not? Besides, I can't fulfill my dream of marrying and having a family if I can't even touch a guy right?"

He did not want to imagine her with another guy right now.

"Alright. Let's get started soon then. Are you free this Sunday? Let's go on a date."

Kaneki looked at his overall outfit and dusted off some dirt from his shirt whilst waiting outside Touka's apartment. He exhaled to calm his nerves since this was his first date in 3 years, and found that exhaling did not help his feeling jittery at all.

He reminded himself of his duties as a doctor which was the reason why he proposed for them to be in a relationship, to begin with. No flirting, no touching her without her consent and protect her.

From what he heard from her, she has problems walking in crowds because it often meant she had to squeeze and walk in the near distance with men. This often caused her inconvenience and she would always wait for early morning or late night when there was no one before she walked on the streets.

As for transport to any place, she always took a taxi and made sure the driver was a woman.

So for today's session, he would try to let her get used to walking on a crowded street and taking the bus and train.

"H-hi, Doctor Kaneki. You're here early."

Snapping out of his thoughts, Kaneki looked down at Touka who had a nervous smile on her face and took a moment to appreciate the effort she put into her outfit--which consisted of a blue skater dress and a brown pair of sandals. She had a crossbody sling bag where he spotted the rabbit keychain he gave her hanging from the zip.

"Is my outfit too much? When I told my friend that I was going on a date, she insisted on choosing an outfit for me.." She asked, avoiding his eyes and twirling a lock of her hair nervously.

In her heart, she was hoping that he would like her outfit. After all, she went through a 4-hour hair session at the hair salon, had her manicure and pedicure done, and went shopping for new clothes.

Her current outfit was a big difference from her usual t-shirt and shorts she wore whenever they met at the hospital and Kaneki thought he should at least compliment her on it despite knowing that it could be taken as a form of flirting.

"You look pretty."

Only 3 words and he was slightly amused at how her cheeks flushed pink.

Cute.

"Thank you."

They started off from an alleyway where only a few people would pass through. As it was quite a wide area, she seemed okay whenever men walked because there was a certain distance between her and them. But as the alleyway turned narrower, the distance also shrunk.

He could tell from her shaking body that she was afraid but was glad at her effort in not running away.

The next stop was taking the bus. He could tell her struggle of shying away whenever a male came to stand near her and forced herself to remain rooted in her place. However, when the bus goes or stops and the people around her accidentally touches her, she would shift away if it were a male.

The next one was taking the train. Unlike the bus, she couldn't move away as the train is always packed with no space to move around.

Touka was now squashed between the train door and a male on the train. The heat from his body and the smell of sweat disgusted her. Her immense discomfort showed on her face and Kaneki moved to put himself between the man and her, his arms pressing on the train door above her head.

"You alright?" He asked, worried that this might be too much for her.

Her cheeks flushed when the train turned and his body pressed up against hers, too close for comfort but she didn't hate it to her surprise. Her face was against his chest and he smelt of mint and sandalwood.

"S-sorry." He apologized and she shook her head.

The train treatment did not work out as they ended up in that position all the way until their destination with Touka blushing and Kaneki looking elsewhere embarrassingly with a blush on his face.

Their next stop was a shopping street. As it got later in the day, more people poured in and Touka found it hard to avoid men as well as before when the street was empty. Despite that, she found herself enjoying the outing with Kaneki very much because he'd offer to buy her things, food and anything she wanted.

Even though this relationship was only temporary, it felt real. It felt like they were really a couple who had romantic feelings with one another. For once in her life, she experienced how it was like to be someone's girlfriend and to be on a date with them.

She was too busy looking at a stall that she didn't notice a man trying to barge through the number of people and almost hit her. But Kaneki noticed and quickly had his hand on her shoulder to pull her away from being run over and into an empty alleyway.

The action caused her body to press against his, her breasts, hands, and face on his chest and her heartbeat roared in her ears as his arm wrapped around her waist to pull her close. As her ear was on his chest, she could hear the racing heartbeat beneath his shirt and started to think that her own heart might also be racing like his, and it was definitely because she was in his arms.

"Are you okay?" He asked but she didn't reply. Instead, she looked up at him dazedly.

Instead of releasing her, which he should, his arm remained wrapped around her waist as he gazed down at her before his hand came to cup her cheek.

"Touka.."

Her heart skipped a beat when he called her by her first name—which has never happened before. It has always been Kirishima and the fact that he's calling her by that name now on a date made the moment more intimate.

Just as quickly her heart raced, he dropped his hand and looked away. "Sorry. If you're alright, let's continue walking."

Touka felt a pang of disappointment when he separated himself from her and proceeded to pretend as if nothing between them happened. It felt so right to be in his embrace. If it were any other man, she wouldn't have wished for him to continue holding her.

Upon reaching home after the date, Kaneki buried his face into his hands.

When he saw that she was about to get run over, his body had reacted on instinct and pulled her out of the way. In the process, it couldn't be helped that he touched her. It couldn't be helped that she landed in his arms. It couldn't be helped that he cupped her cheek—who was he kidding?

From the way she had looked at him, it made him want to kiss her. Her eyes were wide and her pink lips parted slightly. The way her body felt so right in his arms did not help either.

He cursed. Hadn't he promised himself not to touch her without permission? Hadn't he promised himself not to get his feelings mixed up with his work?

Over the course of 4 months, he had gotten to know her personally and her hardworking attitude was what caught him. With her, he felt a level of a bond between them whenever she shared bits and pieces of her personal life, work, hobbies, and many other things.

Along the way, he had fallen half in love with her.

She made him feel like no other girl had done so before, aside from Fumika, his ex-girlfriend. She made him feel alive again, ever since Fumika died.

He wondered when he started having these feelings towards her and thought that maybe it started when she comforted him with a hug when he talked about his ex-girlfriend. The way she had empathized with him and provided comfort had touched his heart despite her being androphobic.

Shaking his head, he tucked his feelings for her away deep and swore to himself that he wouldn't allow himself to fall deeper in love. If he did, his already fragile heart would break when it came to a time they had to separate.

—

Today was their second date as Touka waited nervously for Kaneki to arrive. She was early today, too excited to sleep and ended up being super early to meet at their meeting point. For her to get used to men, they had agreed to meet outside a train station instead of him picking her up at her house.

She looked at the couples who lingered around the train station and felt envy build within her. They were all talking happily, holding hands and some were even kissing when no one was looking. She wanted it to be that way between her and Kaneki as well. But it seemed that he only saw their dates as part of his work and job.

Even so, with the way he had held her face the previous day, it seemed that he held some feelings for her and she felt slightly comforted by that.

For afar, she saw Kaneki running towards her whilst waving and smiling. They soon departed for their destination for the movie theatre. His explanation for choosing this as their next treatment was if she were able to take being close to him—a male—for several hours, she would then be able to date a guy like a normal person.

As they walked and talked, Touka couldn't help but stare at his hand and had the urge to grab it. When she talked about what happened on her first date to Yoriko, her friend had patted her hard on the shoulder and told her to go for it. He obviously had some feelings for her and if she didn't do anything about it, she would regret it.

She gathered up her courage and grabbed hold of his hand. His head swung to look at her, his eyes wide and then directed his attention down to their intertwined hands. Her cheeks warmed. "T-this is okay, right? I want to hold your hand."

He remained silent as to ponder over her question and she wanted to prevent him from coming up with any excuses. "I-it's for me to practice holding hands so I can do so with my boyfriend in the future!"

She swore she saw a frown hanging from his lips for a split second before he changed it into a smile. "Sure."

As they sat side by side in the movie theatre, Touka realized that she didn't want to learn how to have physical touch with a male. She didn't care about other men, she wanted it to be him. Only him.

So, as subtly as she could, she slowly shifted closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder during the movie. Kaneki noticed and turned his head to look at her, which resulted in them gazing into each other's eyes, in close proximity in a dark room.

To her dismay, he turned his attention back to the movie. Her hand moved to rest on his chest, over his beating heart.

"Touka, don't. We're not at that stage yet."

"..what if I'm ready to enter that stage?" She murmured.

She had no idea where she got the courage to act so boldly in front of him but she did and hoped that he would get the hint.

"We promised that we would take it slowly, didn't we? Besides, we're in public." He whispered.

"Okay.." she replied in disappointment.

They ended up going on another few dates after that, slowly exploring more of the physical touch aspect of their treatment.

As the touch increased to hugging, so did Kaneki's struggles with his feelings. He had wanted to keep it professional but he can't help but wish that this was all real—that they were truly a couple. It seemed that with each passing date, the more his barrier in dating her weakened. And he knew it was because he hadn't dated in a long time and Touka was a one of a kind woman.

Having been with her for the past 5 months, he has since seen many parts of her. How she'd start talking a lot once she was familiar with him, sometimes talking very excitedly about certain things, how her eyes would shine at the sight of anything rabbit-like, how she dislikes tomatoes just because they're red, how her cheeks turn pink whenever she was embarrassed and every one of this traits made him want her for himself.

While his duty as a doctor had been to cure her androphobia, he didn't want her to interact with other men but him. He was jealous of the men who would come into contact with her in the future. Jealousy was one factor present in love, he realized and shook off his thoughts.

Their date today was the summer festival. Donning their yukatas, Kaneki and Touka headed to the main area—the food and game stalls—and had a lot of fun. They were seated on a picnic mat when the fireworks show started. As the fireworks went high up in the sky, the noises by the crowd and the heat of the summer air didn't matter.

What mattered was how they were mere inches apart from one another, looking at a beautiful sight in front of them and it felt as if they were the only two people in the world, with all the sounds but the fireworks, drowned out.

"It's beautiful..." Touka murmured, eyes focusing on the fireworks, mesmerized by it.

"It is..."

While his words may have been meant for the fireworks, they were actually directed at her, as his eyes never once left her face as he said the words.

Once the fireworks were over, everyone started heading home, hence the huge crowds with people squeezing with one another trying to leave the area.

Kaneki turned back to Touka who was just behind him and took her hand with a smile. "It's so we don't get separated."

She nodded, one of her hands going to touch her hair. Her heart dropped when she couldn't find the rabbit hairpin that he gave her. It's gone.

"I have to go back! I lost something!"

She let go of his hand and returned the way they came, leaving him alone to be carried away further from her by the crowd. Running back to the grassy area where they sat to watch the fireworks, she got on her knees and started to feel around the grass for her hairpin.

She didn't care that her yukata got dirty, she had to find the hairpin. It was a gift from him and it was important to her.

At the corner of her eye, she spotted something shiny and went over, to find her hairpin.

"Here it is!" She exclaimed, picking it up happily and dusting the grass away that was on it. Securing it tightly in her hair, she smiled and was about to return to him when she was approached by 2 middle-aged men.

"Hey pretty girllllll, what are you doing all alone out hereeeee? Where's your friends???"

"Wanna come with us to have some funnnn?"

From the red blush on their cheeks and their slurred words, she could gather that they were drunk and walked to the side to avoid getting involved with them.

One male grabbed her by the arm and pulled her flush up against his body. The male's breath stunk of alcohol and she bleched at the smell, adding on to her initial disgust of being against a sweaty, drunken man.

When the man's hands started creeping up her thighs, and the other guy yanked her yukata to reveal her shoulders and cleavage, Touka's eyes brimmed with tears. She recalled that day as a young child, where the exact same thing happened.

She knew she should do something to save herself but her body just froze at the spot. She cursed herself for being weak and questioned herself the reason why she even learned judo and aikido for self-protection if she can't even use it when she needed it now. Her heart thumped in her ears and she couldn't move her limbs.

At that moment of crisis, her knight in shining armor came—Kaneki.

From her disheveled clothes and tears running down her cheeks, it doesn't take a genius to realize what was going on here. Anger boiled within Kaneki and he clenched his hands into fists. He charged at them and punched the 1st male who had his arms around Touka.

The man stumbled and fell to the floor, roaring in pain and held his cheek which was starting to turn swollen. The other male ran towards Kaneki and she shouted his name to alert him. He took down the other male with a punch to the face and the stomach, leaving both males rolling in the floor in pain.

Police soon came and after giving the details to the policemen, the males were handed over and Kaneki held the trembling Touka in his arms. "I'll take you home," he said, and he didn't allow any room for discussion.

Throughout the whole car ride, he refused to look at her and she could tell that he was angry from the fury in his eyes. But she was too scared to say anything and so the entire car ride was just silent.

Only after depositing her in her room, that Kaneki decided to release all of his anger and shout at her.

"What were you thinking?! If I hadn't made it in time, you could have been raped by those men! What was the thing you lost that was so important you had to go back to get it?!" He roared.

This was her first time seeing the gentle-natured him angry and yelling at her that it scared her and she backed away.

"I-I'm sorry... I just—wanted to find it myself and I didn't want to bother you for it...

Kaneki sighed angrily and ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "You know you would never bother me. I said from the start that I will be with you."

"I know, I just—" tears welled up in her eyes again. "I lost the rabbit hair clip you gave me and I wanted to get it back. It's precious to me..."

Her hand rested on the small hair clip that was pinned on her bangs. Stunned silent that she actually risked herself to get the hair clip back, Kaneki let out another sigh in resignation and cupped her cheeks. "I get that it is important to you, but ask for my help next time, you know I'll never refuse you. Promise me, Touka."

She nodded. "I'm sorry."

"You're forgiven." He smiled before a worried expression came on. "Are you okay? Did they hurt you? Do you need me to do anything for you?"

Her lips trembled. "I was so scared... it reminded me of that day when the same thing happened to me when I was young."

"..do you want to tell me about it? You don't have to force yourself."

She shook her head. "I will. It's about time I did."

"I was only 13 years old then. I was with my dad and little brother at a shopping street when we got separated. I wandered along the alleyway where nobody was around and I had hoped to find my family, if not the way home. And then, 2 men came along."

Releasing a shaky breath, Kaneki's hands ran up and down her arm to soothe her and gave her the courage to continue on.

"When I asked them for help, they laughed and asked me to give them something in return for their help. Being a young girl at the time with no money, I brought out some sweets from my pockets and offered it to them. But their idea of a reward was different from mine. They cornered me to the wall, and one man held my arms and legs while the other tore the clothes from my body."

Anger rose within Kaneki at the men that did that to her and he forced it down, not wanting to interrupt her story.

"They touched me. They felt up my legs, my arms, everywhere and I was crying but I couldn't run because they were holding me and—by the time I was found, it was too late—" she sobbed and he hugged her tightly. Without her continuing, he already knew the rest of the story. She was raped.

"What happened to those men?"

"..They went to jail."

"They deserve more than jail for taking advantage of a young girl like you. They deserve death."

Touka withdrew and smiled weakly. "You're so nice, Kaneki."

"I'm sorry I couldn't be there to help you. If only I knew you back then..."

"It's not your fault, or anyone's. I just happened to be there at the wrong timing. That's all."

Gazing into her blue eyes, Kaneki was overcome with sorrow for the young innocent girl she was who had to suffer this kind of thing. He wanted nothing more but to do anything to comfort her and hold her in his arms until she was alright. Cupping her cheek, he ran his thumb across her pink lips and leaned down to kiss her.

Her eyes widened and before she could react, he pulled away and caressed her cheeks. "Do you trust me, Touka?"

"I do."

Aside from her best friend Yoriko, he was the only other person she trusted the most. It seemed that her answer made him happy as he smiled.

"Then...let's take the next step in our relationship. Give me a chance to hold you, let me make you forget what happened with those men today and when you were young."

She could see the truth in his words from his eyes and couldn't refuse.

"Okay."

Then, he kissed her again.

—

As they basked in the afterglow of their making love, Kaneki held her tightly in his arms and inhaled her scent before kissing her head. He knew he had to leave now and yet, he didn't stop her when she leaned up to kiss him. Instead, he returned the kiss, hands splayed across the soft skin of her back to pull her closer.

The expression that she gazed at him with and a contented smile told him everything. She loved him. It was a sad thing, for he couldn't love her back.

He cupped her cheek, pushing her violet strands to the back of her ear and remained silent, taking the time to craft his next words.

"As of today, your treatment is complete. As a doctor, I'm really happy for you that you have overcome your fear of men. We won't be meeting every week anymore but I will give you an open appointment, should your phobia relapses. You will be able to go on with life normally and it is my greatest pride as a doctor to see you functioning healthily as a member of society."

At that moment, he got up and started to get dressed. Holding the blanket to her chest, Touka watched as he put on the last of his clothing—his shirt—and chewed on her lower lip. "Will we see each other again?"

After getting dressed, he made sure for his back to face her so that his face wouldn't give away any of his feelings. He could not. Previously, he was only half in love with her. But now, after they've done it, he's fallen completely in love with her and it was too late. "Unless your condition relapses, we will not. As a doctor, I hope it won't come to that."

"..but if I want to see you again?" She asked, hoping that he would at least allow it.

Kaneki's hands turned into fists and he struggled with the answer. The thought of never seeing her again made his heartache, because even if he tried to control it, he had feelings for her and he wanted to see her every day. Alas, he couldn't, because he would just be stringing her along, knowing her romantic feelings for him, when he couldn't love her the way he should.

"No."

Her heart dropped at his answer. "Why?"

"There's no reason for us to meet one another. As of today, our couple status is broken and we agreed to become a couple in the first place to treat your phobia."

"But..what about all the time we shared together? The dates, the laughter, the hugs? Are you telling me that it was all for my treatment, and they didn't mean anything to you? We had fun, and I thought...that we were getting closer.." She looked down, tears brimming in her eyes as she recalled the dates they had, the times where he held her hand and smiled at her. The way he had kissed her so lovingly and passionately during their making love... everything made her believe that they were in love.

Seeing her cry, he almost wanted to go to her and hug her and tell her he was sorry. But he hardened, it was for her own good. Even if he ended up hurting her, it would be much better than her realizing late in their relationship that he couldn't love her 100%, because part of his heart would always belong to Fumika.

He forced his tone to be cold. "It was only for your treatment. I felt nothing. I don't love you, and I never will. Your feelings are only temporary and it will fade if we were to part."

"W-we can try again to be in a real relationship and not for my phobia! We can be a real couple and I'm sure that with time, our feelings towards one another will be the same—"

He turned towards her and shook his head with a frown. "That wouldn't work. Goodbye, Touka."

As he stepped out of her house and her life that day, he couldn't help but feel regret over his actions and that she didn't come after him.

—

Two weeks after that incident...

Hugging her knees to her chest, Touka had a movie marathon consisting of sappy romantic movies and binge ate ice cream and waffles alone. There were no messages nor calls from Kaneki and it felt as if they were never a thing at all.

Tears welled up in her eyes once again as she recalled the way Kaneki had rejected her and left her life as quickly as the way he entered her heart. Her first love and it ended with heartbreak.

Ah, so this was the heartbreak that Yoriko was talking about... She felt like crying all the time and often didn't want to go to work. Her heart ached wherever she went and would remember Kaneki in everything she did.

Deciding that she needed to stop moping, she got up and looked around her messy room. It's time for a spring cleaning. The first thing she did was look under her bed, she always liked to shove her things under there to avoid putting them back to its places.

It was a mess down there, as expected, but she spotted a notebook mixed in there. Puzzled since she's never had a blue notebook, she picked it up and opened it.

—

Closing his eyes, Kaneki rested his head on his desk and allowed himself a short 15 minutes nap. Ever since he broke up with Touka, he missed her so damned much that he hasn't been able to sleep well at night.

With his exhausted self, he soon entered his nap. He woke up in his own bed, turning to the side to find Touka sleeping beside him. The silver band on her left fourth finger shined in the morning light.

The scene cut to the living room, where he found himself fully dressed and Touka stood with her back towards him in the kitchen. She was cooking. Then, she walked towards him with a plate of food in her hand and a smile on her lips.

The scene cut again, to the park where he observed Touka and a young girl with black and white hair playing with each other. They spotted him and the young girl ran towards him, with the words that shocked him.

"Papa!"

With that, his body jerked and he ended up falling off his chair and to the floor.

Touching his eyes, they came away wet and he squeezed them shut. Even in sleep, he thought about her. He saw a future with her. They were married and they had a child.

Even if it couldn't happen in real life, he was happy to have seen that. At least in his dreams, they were happy together.

Groggily, he got up and went to shower. He hasn't slept well for the past week and needed to wash the fatigue away before he started hallucinating of Touka.

—

Rubbing his eyes, Kaneki thought he was hallucinating when he found his ex-girlfriend in his own bedroom. Hallucination or not, she looked livid.

Touka stepped toward him threateningly and raised a book in her hand. "I found this in my room."

That book..! No wonder he couldn't find it anywhere! She must have read it already if she was this angry.

He seemed shocked and she continued by flipping through the pages. "And at one glance, it looks to be a report of my progress in curing androphobia but at the back of the book, you were writing about your feelings for me. You said 'I love Touka.' That night, why did you say you didn't have feelings for me but you actually do?" Tears threatened to escape her eyes.

"Touka, I—it's complicated.."

Lowering the book onto his bed, Touka moved to cup his cheeks and gazed into his sorrowful eyes. "I told you, the least I could do is listen to your worries. Am I that unreliable to you?"

His eyes turned glassy. "I'm scared. I saw how Fumika succumbed to her depression and left me. She was originally my patient and we started dating soon after. I thought she was getting better, she even looked better, but...she suddenly jumped to her death one day. I was afraid that if I ever dated another patient again, I would experience the same painful feeling of losing that person. Even now, 3 years later, I haven't been able to date someone and am still suffering as the person who's left behind. I'm the best doctor in the department and yet what's the use if I can't even save one patient?"

Touka remained silent to consider her words. "I'm not pretty. I'm not patient. I'm not everything Fumika was. But I can tell you that I love you, and my love for you won't lose to hers. I'll be with you no matter what happens, and I promise I'll tell you everything. I won't hold all my worries to myself, I won't be like her."

He shook his head. "Even since she died, I became a broken man. I won't allow you to be stuck with someone like me. You deserve someone else, someone better than me. Someone who can give you the happiness you deserve and that person is not me."

"The point of having a lover is for them to stand by their sides no matter what, isn't it? If I have a problem, you would stand by me, wouldn't you? Then what's wrong if I do the same for you?"

"I—" Kaneki smiled weakly. "When you put it that way, you make it hard for me to reject you."

She grinned. "Then don't reject me. Say yes."

He hesitated. "Apart from being broken and scared, my other reason for not dating you is because part of my heart still belongs to Fumika. Are you really okay with that?"

"Yeah. I'll allow her to have that part of your heart and secretly hope that the remaining of whatever's left will go to me. If it doesn't, I'll make you love me." She grinned, throwing her arms around his neck.

He laughed for real for the first time in ages and leaned his forehead against hers, gazing into her eyes. "You don't have to do that. That part of my heart already belongs to you. I had thought loving another was impossible ever since Fumika's death, but then you came along and changed everything. Within a few months, I fell in love with you, despite your rudeness, brashness—" he winced as he earned a jab in his ribs and a scowl from her. "I love you, Touka. I really do. Will you be my girlfriend? For real, this time."

"You know my answer."

He grinned. "Then will you give me a chance to show you how much I love you?"

Touka cocked her head to the side, puzzled. She shrieked in surprise when he suddenly bent down to carry her in his arms before dropping her onto his bed. His lips molded with hers and the tears that she shed were tears of happiness.

In the aftermath of their making love, she laid on his chest with his arm around her waist, listening as his heartbeat returned to the normal stable one and closed her eyes in contentment.

"You know, in my dreams, I saw you," Kaneki spoke.

"Hm?? What did you see about me?" She asked, eyes still closed.

"You were in my bed, sleeping. We were married, from the silver ring on your finger. Then suddenly you were cooking, then we were at the park with our child."

"Child?" She opened her eyes to look at him, echoing after him.

He nodded. "It'd be nice if it were real."

True to his words, they married a year later and had a child with a mix of black and white hair named Ichika. It took a while but Kaneki decided that letting Touka into his heart was the best thing he ever did. They then lived happily ever after.

#kanetou #touken #kaneki ken #ken kaneki #Touka Kirishima #kirishima touka #tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul re #tg fanfiction #tg #faewrites

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sabraeal · 4 years

Text

Wide Florida Bay | Next

The first post in the 600 Followers Holiday Gift-a-thon! This was technically supposed to be the last chapter of Sensitive Negotiations, BUT....that is taking longer than expected, so the schedule is a little out of order. But here is a nice slice of WFB to start off the month!

Kiki may be a New Englander through and through, but she will admit: there is something deliciously perverse about sitting poolside in March, barely wearing anything more than a bikini.

“So, now that the lightweights have gone home--” a lethally green cocktail plops down next to her, stuffed to the brim with tiny umbrellas-- “shall we go for another round, Ms Kiki?”

Obi’s three drinks relaxed, his vowels stretched long to a more musical miz. She’s heard of this phenomenon before; his first year in the frat, Obi had spent Halloween getting entirely wasted on craft pumpkin beer, and Mitsuhide had told her somewhere around three in the morning he’d slurred out a drawled ‘suh’ as he rolled him into bed. Charming, he’d called it.

“Just one more,” she agrees, shifting her knees so he can slide in next to her. “But only if we follow it up with water. I refuse to spend my first night in paradise holding your hair over a toilet.”

“Aww.” He wiggles in his chair, pleased. “You’d do that for me?”

“I just said I wouldn’t.”

His teeth flash white in the night, as quick as a meteor. “If you say so, Ms. Kiki.”

He sprawls out, long legs stretching out across the brick, letting loose a sigh so heavy he might as well be Atlas.

“So.” She arches a brow, settling back to match his slouch. “You’re dressed nice.”

If she had blinked, she would have missed how his shoulders tense, how for a brief moment his grin becomes a grimace.

“Oh, princess,” he drawls, recovered, “had I known you’d be down here I would have dressed to the nines.”

“But you didn’t and you’re not.” She sips at her cocktail, enjoying the sour citrus burn as she swallows it down. “So who did you take out?”

“Ahh-hah.” He squirms in his chair, shoulders hunched. “I can’t believe you guessed.”

“Obi, you’re wearing aftershave.” The coconut is a nice touch, but she’ll die before she tells him it mixes nicely with the sandalwood. “I can smell it from over here.”

His jaw drops, and she can see the moment he tries to smell it himself, where he wonders if it’s too strong or just enough -- and then he shakes his head. “It doesn’t matter. There’s not going to be a second date.”

Oh, curiouser and curiouser. “Is that so?”

“There’s not really much of a point.” His eyes dart to her, a flash of gold in the moonlight, before tilting up. “Not when I’m in love with Shirayuki.”

Kiki stares. It’s all she can manage for a handful of seconds, just staring at him as he stares at the moon.

“Oh,” she manages, “are you drunk?”

He flicks a flat look at her. “No. I just thought it was fair because, you know, Big Guy aired all your dirty laundry tonight. With the whole...”

Obi make a spiral-type gesture with his hand as he lifts his own glass, a clear invitation to fill in the blank he can’t bear to.

“Break up?” She shrugs. “We’ll see how long that lasts.”

He nearly chokes on his Hurricane. “Miz Kiki.”

“He has a lot on his plate right now.” Kiki hesitates. It’s-- it’s hard to talk about this. There’s no one who knows Mitsuhide like her, not a soul, and she’s confident she knows what all this taking a break talk is about, but --

She’s Kiki Seiran. Cold. Unemotional. Reasonable. And out of any other mouth, this would sound like...denial.

But Obi leans in, attentive, not a hint of doubt or judgement on his face, and she just...lets go of all of it.

“It’s not about me,” she tells him, never feeling more like a high school girl in this moment.

“Of course not.” There’s not a hint of mocking in his voice, just simple earnestness. “Just look at you.”

Her mouth slants into a smile. “Thanks for the vote of confidence. But I mean...” She heaves a sigh. “This is about what happened with...”

She doesn’t have the words to explain it; this is about business and duty and a whole bunch of people Mitsuhide feels like he’s letting down, starting and ending with Zen, and--

“Touka Bergatt,” Obi supplies with a nod. “That whole shitshow.”

“Yes,” she sighs. “All that. He’s worried he’s failed, and now...”

“Now he’s throwing rocks at you because he loves you, I get it.” Obi presses a hand to his chest with a rueful smile. “I think we all know I get that better than anyone.”

A laugh barks out of her. “At least you’ve had the grace to outgrow it.”

His gaze drops to his drink, mouth stretched to a rictus grin. “I wonder.”

This is the problem with being Kiki Seiran: cold, unemotional, reasonable-- she doesn’t know how to handle things like this, how to grab someone else’s hand while they’re drowning. If money can’t fix a problem, she’s as helpful as a gawker on the beach.

“Besides,” she murmurs into her drink, letting the alcohol numb the sting of her awkwardness, “if he doesn’t come around, Hisame’s got a nice ass.”

Obi gasps, scandalized. “He does not.”

She lifts her eyebrows.

“Absolute not,” he insists, “his booty is distinctly not banging.”

“Mm.” She takes another sip. “This rating sounds biased.”

He presses a hand to his chest, wounded. “Miz Kiki, my taste is unimpeachable.”

“Your taste is adorable red heads who throw themselves into bodies of water,” she reminds him. “Which I suppose only proves your point.”

“Exactly,” he sniffs waspishly. “And don’t forget it.”

She giggles, smothering it with her drink, and in the pause she watches Obi’s face go on a journey. It lasts less than a second, but it’s clear: content to tense to concern to resignation, all culminating in the too-earnest gaze he turns on her.

“I meant to thank you,” he blurts out, fingers white around the stem of his glass. “For being a good friend. I mean, I’m glad we’re friends.”

She blinks. “Are you sure you’re not drunk?”

He sends her a half-hearted glare. “Kiki.”

“I’m just...” At a loss. Obi doesn’t really do emotions. It’s why she likes him so much. “Did you kill someone? Do I need to make it disappear?”

“Kiki.”

“Is that why we’re talking about--” she waves her hand-- “feelings?”

“No.” His whole body is shaking, and it takes her a mull moment to realize-- he’s laughing. “I just wanted to say you’re a good friend. Not just to me, but...” He hesitates, considering. “But you know, to Doc too.”

Ah, yes. That would be what mattered to him. “Obi, you know that Shirayuki is the single easiest person to love.”

He shakes his head with a huff of a laugh. “Don’t I. But I meant...” His mouth pulls into a grimace, like his words are a briar patch he needs to pick through. “She thinks a lot of you. Some people would be...weird about it. But you’re not. So...thanks.”

This is singularly the most confusing conversation she has ever been a part of, and considering how her close acquaintance involves Izana Wisteria, she feels like that says something. “It’s not a problem. I think a lot of her, too.”

“No, that’s not--” he sighs, running a hand through his hair-- “I mean, she really thinks a lot of you.”

Oh. Oh. That. “Huh.”

“And even though you don’t think of her quite as much,” Obi continues, as if somehow this was a less awkward way of discussing this, “you don’t-- get weird about it. Or take advantage. And lots of people would. Lots of people have.”

Kiki can only stare. She’d like to know some of those names. For reasons. “It’s a compliment that someone like Shirayuki likes me. After all,” she smirks, “it’s not like she’s Hisame.”

They share a grimace. She may not be wrong about his ass, but she still remembers what Obi had said after he’d met him again, after he’d heard how helpful he had rendered himself--

Oh, well. Obi’s grin is still bright in her memory. Since he’s decided to drink his Respect Women juice today, I guess we should all trust him forever.

“I know that,” he says. She wonders how it doesn’t kill him, watching her have so easily what he only wishes he could have.

Or well, what he thinks he could only wish to have. She’d seen how Shirayuki had looked that summer, waiting for Obi to take her to Boston for their date, an how she’d looked at him tonight when he’d offered to walk her to her room. Unlike Obi, Kiki isn’t blind.

“I mean...it’s good that you’re nice, even though you don’t like girls.” His face crumples, thoughtful. “Unless you do? You know, we’ve never really talk about this, so I guess you could, but then--”

“Oh my god, don’t hurt yourself, Obi,” she laughs. “Yes, I like men. Just men.”

He leans over the table, huffing out a relieved sigh. “Oh, good. Yeah, me too.”

It takes him a full second to realize what he’s said, to jolt upright and frantically clarify, “I mean, not just men. I mean that’s I’m, um--” oh god, he’s clearly torturing himself-- “you know--”

“Into both?” she offers as he blurts out, “BISEXUAL.”

She blinks. “You used your words. That’s unprecedented.” She casts a dubious glance at his drink. “Are you sure you aren’t drunk?”

“Kiki,” he whines, pained.

Oh, of course he’d torture himself about this too. “I know you are, Obi.”

“What?” he squeaks. “Since when?”

“I didn’t mark it in my calendar.” He makes a sad puppy whimper, and she sighs. “I don’t know...probably not the first time I met you, but not too much after.”

Obi glances down at his lap, wide-eyed, like he’s never seen himself before. “But how?”

She gives him the flattest look she can summon with such short notice. “No one cares about Mitsuhide missing leg day so much unless they want to fuck him.”

“You did!”

“Then I guess the theory holds,” she deadpans. “If I knew that you were hiding it, I would have said something sooner.”

“I wasn’t hiding,” he insists, defensive. “I just didn’t think-- why didn’t you--?”

She shrugs. “I just thought it was so obvious that you assumed everyone knew. I mean, you talked about everyone’s asses.”

He lets out a honk that wouldn’t be out of place on a dying swan. “Do the Chief and Big Guy know?”

“Please,” she scoffs. “They can’t even find their own dicks, let alone yours. Besides,” she continues, mouth twitching into a smirk, “if Zen had known, he would have done more than eyefuck you for an entire year.”

Obi’s jaw drops. “W-what?”

She raises a skeptical brow. “What, did you miss it while you were busy flirting wildly with him?”

It’s not the first time she’s seen Obi blush, but this is definitely the most satisfying. “I did not!”

“I think I could count on one hand the number of times you did not walk around half the house with just a towel on after you showered when he was home.” She grins. “Flirting.”

He frowns. “Yeah, well, I could count on one hand the number of times you didn’t bend down in that field hockey skirt right in front of Mistuhide.”

Kiki gives him a pitying look. “That must have seemed like a much sicker burn in your head.”

“Yeah, that really would have worked better if you hadn’t, you know, ended up fucking him.” He cradles his head in his hands with a moan. “But Mitsuhide...”

“Obi,” she sighs. “I literally had to have his dick in me for him to realize I liked him, that is where Mitsuhide’s personal powers of observation are at.” She lets out a laugh, “He thought I walked into the shower with him by mistake.”

He stares at her, mouth twitching. “I really don’t know who I feel sorrier for.”

“It’s me,” she informs him. “Listen, if you don’t tell him something, he doesn’t know. So you don’t need to worry about that.”

Obi tips back his head, letting out a relieved sigh. “Right, good.”

“But you should.” He glances at her, brow furrowed. “Tell him, I mean.”

He tenses, shoulders hunching, his whole body retreating in on itself. “I don’t know...”

“Obi.” She presses her lips together, gathering her courage, and puts her hand over his. He jolts, fixing it with a wide-eyed gaze. “I know we don’t do...feelings. But--” she squeezes his hand-- “we’re here for you. Especially Mitsuhide. You’ve always been who you’ve been, and telling us who you are won’t change any of that.”

“Right.” he nods, quick, terse. “I...I know that. I do. It’s just...a hard habit to break, you know.”

“Yeah,” she says with a bitter laugh. “I know.”

He hesitates. “Chief will freak out, though.”

“Oh, almost definitely,” she agrees, settling back. “But he’s got...baggage. After the initial shock, he’ll come around. He’s just got to get over himself first.”

Obi rolls his eyes, a faint grin lifting his lips. “Yeah, and--” he peers over the edge of the banister-- “did Chief just throw Big Guy in the ocean?”

“What?” She peers over, watching Mitsuhide resurface before Zen begins to lay into him. “Oh, Jesus. Let’s go get them before they kill each other.”

“Aw, Miz Kiki,” Obi drawls, following behind her, “but Jolly Green wouldn’t hurt a fly!”

Kiki grunts. “Not who I’m worried about.”

#akagami no shirayukihime #snow white with the red hair #my fic #The Wide Florida Bay #modern AU #the screenshot above brought to you by me #screwing up and posting instead of saving to drafts #DEEP SIGH #anyway this is set after bergatt arc obv!#and obviously i couldn't take this prompt straight when sarah gave me such a good opportunity #to absolutely dodge #(don't worry you'll get THAT too)#i already have a prompt for it

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petri808 · 4 years

Text

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 22 | 23 | 24

thank you so much for your patience with this late chapter! I had some frustrating family drama pop up so I wasn't able to finish it until today. Enjoy!

“Lucy, Lucy, Lucy!” Levy plops onto the couch next to her friend. She grabs the blondes arm and shakes it. “Omg you won’t believe what happened today at school!”

“What? What? The teacher you hate croaked?”

“Pfft, I wish. No! I met Natsu’s roommate! Well, technically I’ve known the guy for like a year from school, we were lab partners, remember Gray, I think I mentioned him, anyways, yeah, he totally gave me all the details I wanted to know!”

But at the name Natsu, Lucy frowns and sits back. “Lev, you know I just wanna move on from this...”

“Just hear me out, I promise it’ll be worth it.” She leans in, “trust me.”

Lucy rolls her eyes. “Okay, fine. Spill. What did Gray have to say?”

“So... starting with that Touka chick. Everything Natsu said was true. You’re not the first girl she’s harassed over him, in fact he offered to contact the other girl if you’d like to ask the person yourself.”

“That’s not necessary, I believe it.”

“He also confirmed that the profiles you saw on Ig are fake and how she’s been stalking him for a couple years now.”

“So Gray’s just his roommate?”

“No, he said they’ve been friends since middle school, so he knows Natsu well.”

“Anything else?”

“The stuff he told you about his family are true. Um, he works at a place called Yousei Mart, and that he’s an idiot but a good guy that is just really naive sometimes. The more he talked, the more I remembered him mentioning his roommate before. Like venting about stuff. Anyway, he said Natsu’s been completely distressed over all this and he thinks you should give his friend a second chance. I think so too, Lu, cause I believed him that Natsu’s a great guy and this whole Touka business is just unfortunate.”

The blonde pulls her legs up onto the couch, wraps her arms around them and rests her chin on her knees, thinking about everything she’d learned. Did she really want to deal with the baggage? What if Touka continues to harass her or them? It would be unfortunate to lose a guy like Natsu, because he really did seem like one of the good guys. She pulls up the memories of him on the train when he’d cornered her... ‘he was really devastated...’ and to do what he’d done, the amount of time he spent chasing and waiting for her, he must really like her to go that far.

“Well, Lu? What do you think?”

She’d definitely be using a higher standard to judge him, so he’ll need to be very convincing to gain her trust a second time, but, “I guess it couldn’t hurt to give him another chance.”

“Then there’s just one last thing for you to do.”

“Ugh,” she groans, “call him.” Lucy picks up her phone and dials Natsu’s number, but he doesn’t pick up. So, she hangs up without leaving a message. She made the first call, now it was his turn to respond if he wanted a second chance.

Approximately thirty minutes later an out-of-breath Natsu is on the phone. “Sorry Lucy! I was in class and the teacher is a real dick about cellphones.” He’d literally run out the room the second the lecture was over to call her back.

“It’s fine, I thought that might be the case.”

“Did you wanna talk to me about something?”

“Yeah, first have you spoken to your roommate at all today?”

“Um... no, why is something wrong with him?”

“Well, in that case...” she pauses and takes a deep breath. “So, turns out your roommate and my roommate have a class together, actually have had several, so they know each other and today they talked about us.”

“Really...” guess he’ll be calling Gray after this phone call!

“Look, bottom line is I believe my friend and since she believes your roommate about you and that girl... I’ll give you another chance. But remember! It’s not because I trust you yet it’s because I trust them.”

“I’ll take it! I understand totally and I promise I’ll do anything to prove to you that you can trust me.”

“I mean, I’m not sure how, but...”

“Um...” Natsu thinks fast, “are you busy right now?”

“Now? Um, not really...”

“I gotta run or I’ll be late for work, but can you meet me at Yousei Mart near Haramachi park as soon as you can?”

“Why?”

“Please?? I’ll buy you dinner too for coming.”

‘Ugh...’ “Okay, I’ll get ready and head over.”

“Thank you!! I’m just really happy you’re giving me a chance Lucy. Okay, I’ll see you soon!”

Lucy hangs up the phone and lets her roommate know she was heading out to see Natsu. The location he’d asked her to go to was several blocks away and takes her 20 minutes to get there. So, as she walked, she did her best to keep her cool. Half of her was thrilled to try again while the other half still apprehensive. Natsu had sounded so excited too, she could almost picture the man doing a victory dance the moment they’d ended the phone call. But where was this place that he wanted her to go to? She knew it was like a convenience store, maybe that’s where he works? Must be if he’d said he needed to get to work and still wanted to see her.

“Irasshaimase!” Lucy hears as she enters the store. A bit odd for a convenience store, but welcoming, nonetheless. She’s greeted by an employee, a red headed woman.

“May I help you find anything?”

“Actually, I’m here to see Natsu. He asked me to come.”

“Oh! You must be Lucy! Please, follow me,” the woman gestures, “he’s in the back working on inventory. My name is Erza by the way and we’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Really?” Hopefully nothing bad...

“Oh, yes. The pretty blonde he met on a train. The guy can’t shut up about you,” Erza laughs. “It was just weird, well new because we’ve never seen him so excited over a girl before.”

Lucy blushes from the compliment. “How long have you worked with Natsu?”

“Hmm, four years, I think. He started when he was still in high school, but I’ve been here a little longer.” They reach the back area and find Natsu hunched over some boxes tagging items. “Here he is, Natsu, your friend Lucy is here.”

“It’s okay for me to be back here?”

“I don’t see why not,” the woman shrugs. “We’re a pretty tight-knit crew here, like a family, so it’s also pretty lax how things are run.”

“Oh. Okay, thank you Erza.”

“You’re welcome. Stay as long as you like.”

Once the woman goes back to the front, Lucy turns to Natsu who was waiting patiently. “Well, I’m here. What did you want me to see?”

“That was part of it,” he smiles. “You said you didn’t know if you could trust me, so what could be better than introducing you to people who know me best. And people like Erza, she’s got no problem telling it like she sees it. If I was an asshole, she would have been the first to tell you to run away.”

“Yeah, she mentioned you’ve been co-workers for a few years. She seems nice, but I can see what you mean cause she looks tough too.”

Natsu laughs, “that’s an understatement. Oh! Come with me,” he grabs her hand and pulls her along, “gramps is still in the office, so you should meet him!”

“Gramps?”

“He’s the owner. Real name’s Makarov but he tells us to call him Gramps. He really is like a grandfather figure to us. Gave me a job at 17 and I’ve loved every minutes being here!”

She follows along, allowing him to hold her hand. Lucy couldn’t lie that his larger hand was nice and warm, and it felt snug and secure together. ‘Stick to your guns woman!’ She chides herself in an effort to fight the emotions bubbling to the surface. What was it about this man’s damn smile that made her heart thump!

Natsu knocks on the doorframe before going in. “Gramps! There someone I want you to meet.”

The older make looks up from his paperwork. “What is it brat, I’m busy here.”

“Be nice old man, this is that girl Lucy I told you about.”

“Oh... the elusive Lucy you’ve sold your soul for.” He snickers. “Welcome, my dear, it’s nice to finally meet the woman who wrangle our Natsu.”

“W-Wrangle?” She sputters. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about. We barely had one date.”

“I’ve known this kid for a few years and he’s never so much as looked at a woman. I thought he was gay for the longest time till you came along.” He grins. “And by the looks of you, he lucked into a good one.”

The blush on Lucy’s face increases. “I don’t know about that. I mean I’m nothing special.”

“Lucy,” Makarov leans into his desk, “may I call you Lucy?” Once she nods, he continues. “Never sell yourself short if someone gives you a compliment. Take it from this old geezer, when a man is willing to give you his heart, that means you’re pretty special in their eyes.”

She had nothing else to say against such logic. “Thank you, gramps.”

“You’re very welcome,” he smiles. “Now get out, I have work to do.”

For a few more hours, Lucy hangs out with Natsu in the back while he works, and as promised, he buys her a bento dinner from the restaurant next door. Throughout the evening, his co-worker Erza and one more named Mira drops by to check on them or add to the conversation. She learned a lot about him from them because they were not shy about embarrassing the man. It was hilarious!

But best of all, Mira is the sister of the girl who was harassed by Touka. According to the woman, Touka had started off with the same tactics when she’d thought Natsu was seeing her sister Lisanna. Showing up, trying to talk to her, coming off all sweet and innocent. But Lisanna had a boyfriend who eventually scared the girl off. With Mira’s help, Lucy could finally be confident that Natsu had been telling the truth all along.

When the store closes, Natsu insists on walking Lucy home due to the late hour. He pays for them to take the train to make it a faster and safer trip. So, once settled in their seats, she sighs and turns to him. “I believe you now,” her voice is kept soft and low from the other travelers. “You were telling me the truth.”

It was like a wave of relief washes over him, but in that moment, it wasn’t time for an I told you so, so he just grins. “Movie date next?”

#nalu #nalu au #Natsu dragneel #Lucy heartfilia #nalu fan fiction #nalu fan fic #Natsu x lucy #strangers on a train #ch 12 #fairytail

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allthingsanime1997 · 4 years

Text

Into Thin Air - Touken Fanfic

“He isn’t coming back Touka, just accept it.” Nishiki said, sitting next to her while sliding a cup of coffee in front of her.

“Don’t say that,” Touka muttered, sipping the coffee ever so slightly, refusing to believe Nishiki’s words.

Two years ago, Kaneki left and never came back. The man Touka grew to genuinely care about left, just like that. It didn’t seem like he cared, he just disappeared. Anteiku burned down, Yoshimura was gone, Hinami was god knows where, she had nothing left. So, she opened :re. Another coffee shop, a nice one that she owned.

“Don’t listen to him, I think I found him.” Yomo broke the silence, looking at Touka as she met eyes with him.

“What do you mean? You have a lead or something?”

Yomo replied with a nod, sliding a folder in front of her. Touka took it in her hands and opened it, greeted with a photo of a male with black roots and the rest being white. It looked like Kaneki, but it didn’t at the same time.

“Haise Sasaki?” Touka asked, reading out the name on the paper. Yomo nodded, “A ghoul investigator working for the Quinx Squad, from what I’ve gathered he has Rize’s kagune, and sometimes goes a little mad.”

“But this isn’t Kaneki, his name is Haise.”

“Well no shit.” Nishiki mumbled, earning a hit on the head from Touka.

“I believe he somehow lost his memory in the two years he’s been gone, and somehow became a part of this squad. They’re quite powerful, and I know where they’ll be tonight.” Yomo shared.

“Where?”

“Highway about a couple miles to the right. They’re taking care of some escape ghouls. Some powerful ones. It’s a good way to find out if this is Kaneki or not.”

Touka nodded, but didn’t get her hopes up. She stood, her body a bit weak.

“Touka, I think you should stay. You’re not strong enough to be doing this right now.” Yomo looked out for her, he wasn’t going to get her killed.

“I’m going.” Touka walked up the stairs quickly and got herself changed into black jeans and a tee, putting on her black cloak while grabbing the rabbit mask she hadn’t used in quite some time.

Was she nervous? For sure. If this was somehow Kaneki, there was a chance. The whole Haise situation made her doubtful however, she had no idea what she’d do if it was Kaneki and he didn’t remember. It would hurt, badly. Her feelings for Kaneki only grew during the time he was gone, she hadn’t cried herself to sleep since her father died. Now, it turned into a common thing. Feelings weren’t something she was good at working out, so when she was sad she usually just hid away to save herself from a conversation she didn’t want to have.

“If you’re coming, let’s go!” Yomo called from downstairs. Touka stuffed her mask in her cloak and walked downstairs, giving a nod to Yomo and Nishiki.

They make their way out and to the highway, putting their masks on to hide their identity in case anyone saw them. They were up high, out of sight thankfully.

“There.” Yomo pointed out, showing Nishiki and Touka the male with white and black hair.

Touka looked over, curious of what the face looked at. Face is what mattered, hair can be changed, face can’t. Touka’s eyes widened slightly, shocked by the fact it really did look like Kaneki. However, she was told his name was Haise Sasaki, not Ken Kaneki. So, she wondered what in the hell actually happened.

“Oh my god… It does look like him… I want to see his Kagune.” Touka mumbled, sighing lightly.

After some time of waiting, a loud noise caught Touka off guard. A fight was breaking out. The kagune soon came out of the male’s back, sure enough, it was Kaneki’s. Or, what used to be Rize’s. It left Touka completely distraught, it really was him.

Touka began to move, wanting to see him. Yomo pulled her back, “Stop. You’ll get yourself killed if you go over there. I’m not going to let you do that.”

This made Touka glare at him, grabbing her mask. “I’m going. That’s Kaneki over there,”

“I don’t care, you’re going to kill yourself and I’m not letting that happen. Besides, I see Ayato over there, looks like he’s got everything under control.” That only made Touka more pissed.

“Ayato is over there?” She asked, looking over at the scene unfolding. Sure enough, Ayato was there trying to “fix” the situation. She clenched her jaw and balled her hands up in fists, “Why in the actual hell is he here?” Touka’s tone expressed anger, but also had curiosity.

“I don’t know but let him get himself in danger, if anyone is going over there it will be Nishiki.” Yomo responded.

“Why that asshole? He doesn’t need to go over there.”

“Because he may recognize him. He will obviously recognize you but it’s more of a test if needed.”

Touka let out a loud sigh, shaking her head a bit.

Soon, things got pretty heated and Nishiki went down to see. Kaneki, or, Haise had gone crazy. He was destroying things left and right, and he was cracking his fingers the way Yamori did before. This wasn’t Haise, this was Kaneki out.

All Touka could see was Kaneki scream in pain when he saw Nishiki, and Nishiki called him by Kaneki and not Haise. Next thing Touka knew, Kaneki was knocked out by a shot to the head by something from above. Were people there just to calm him if things went wrong?

“Come on Touka, there are doves all around here. We better get out before they catch us.” Yomo started.

“Wait…” Touka whispered, looking closer at who was being inside a CCG car. Hinami. “Wait, its Hinami! We have to get her.”

“We can’t Touka. Come on. I won’t say it again.” Yomo stated as he pulled Touka away from the scene, leading her back to the cafe as Nishiki followed. He had been wounded so that would need to be taken care of so it could heal.

Touka instantly went to her room, changing and curling up in bed. It was Kaneki, it was really him. That, and Hinami had been taken by the CCG, it seems she was with Aogiri such as Ayato. Why the hell was Hinami with Aogiri in the first place? Was all Touka could think about. She just wanted everything to go back to the way they were before Kaneki was taken and tortured by Yamori. He was so different back then. So sweet, innocent, and caring. Now, Touka didn’t know what he was.

The only thing Touka could decipher was that this wasn’t the Kaneki she met, he may be somewhere deep inside but what she saw tonight wasn’t him. He hadn’t been the same since he left for Aogiri. It made her a bit sad. She fell asleep, exhausted from her mental state.

---

The next morning, Touka followed her usual routine. Get up, get dressed, and go work. Nothing too much, it was basically the same as it was before Anteiku burned down.

It was a fairly slow day, not too many customers. When Touka heard the bell sound at the front door, she turned her attention to whoever walked in. Her breath hitched when she saw Haise, he was with the rest of the Quinx Squad.

The group of four sat down, looking at the menu. Touka walked over, “Welcome to :re. What can I get for you?”

“Just four coffees please.” Haise said, not looking up.

Touka nodded and walked behind the counter, making the four cups. Nishiki had his head down at a random table, probably sleeping and recovering from the night before. Once finished, she brought the coffees and set them in front of them. Her eyes met with Haise’s, and she could tell instantly it was Kaneki. They were the grey color, the one that captivated her and made her melt. She missed them… She missed him.

Touka could tell something was going through his mind, though she couldn’t exactly tell what. She was confused when a tear rolled down his cheek, was he sad? In pain? She couldn’t tell. He didn’t show much emotion, just that tear. Was he okay? Was Kaneki somewhere in there wanting to get out? Touka couldn’t tell, she never was able to.

Touka just gave him a bit of a sad smile, walking away to make herself a cup of coffee. She let out a delicate sigh, not being able to look at him. It would just make her want to talk to him and pour out her feelings. It was obvious that he didn’t recognize her, or else he would have said something. Though, she could tell it was Kaneki.

Yomo came downstairs and noticed, walking over to Touka he said, “You doing okay?” Touka just nodded.

“Excuse me?” Touka looked over and noticed Kaneki standing there. “May I please get a refill? It tastes amazing, thought it does taste familiar. I don’t believe I’ve come here.” He gave Touka a small smile.

Touka softly nodded, making him a fresh cup of coffee. “What’s your name?” He asked.

“Touka. Yours?” Of course she knew, but he didn’t know that.

“Haise. It’s nice to meet you. Are you alright? You looked a bit sad before.” Still considerate, that made her smile a little.

“I’m alright, just thinking about an old friend of mine. That’s all.”

Kaneki couldn’t help but to nod. “Someone you liked?”

She nodded, “His name was Kaneki.” It slipped out of Touka’s mouth, she didn’t even mean to say it. “The one eyed ghoul?”

Touka nodded, “He wasn’t a bad person, just misunderstood and put through a lot. He left and hasn’t been back in two years. Nothing.”

“Someone called me Kaneki last night, do I look like him or something?” Haise let out a quiet chuckle, tilting his head.

“Your eyes. They remind me of him. How long have you been here? In Tokyo I mean.” She wanted to change the subject.

“All my life so I’m told. I can’t remember anything before two years ago. I was told my name was Haise and that I was in the Quinx Squad” He explained, shrugging. It didn’t seem like he was sure. Touka wondered what was going through his mind, it was so unreadable and she wished she knew.

“That’s strange, you don’t remember anything before two years ago?”

Haise shook his head, “No. I asked why and they won’t tell me. They just tell me to leave it alone. I just wonder who I was before, who I knew. They must worry about me.”

Touka shook her head slightly, “Just worry about yourself now, and don’t get yourself killed. If you’re killed, you’ll never find out.” She said, her voice a bit quiet. She hoped someday he’d know everything. Memories could come back? Right? They have to. So much happened. Some things he could forget for the better, but he remembered nobody.

“Do you know a young man named Hideyoshi Nagachika?” Touka asked, curious if he knew Hide. It was his best friend before after all.

“Um, I don’t. I’m sorry.”

Shit. Touka thought. He really remembered nothing.

“Anyways, I should get going. I have a case on Gourmet.”

Tsukiyama. Oh no. Touka thought, he fell off the wagon after Kaneki disappeared, after everything happened. Now the CCG was after him, since he was a somewhat easy target.

“What did he do?” Touka asked.

“That’s confidential. Why do you ask?”

“I know him, well, I did. We haven’t talked in years. Did he fall off the grid? Go crazy?”

Haise simply nodded, “Guess you could say that.”

Touka just nodded as a response, sighing. “I’ll see you around.” She said, remembering he said he had to go.

Haise nodded and gave her a smile, paying for the coffees, then leaving with the Quinx Squad.

---

2 Months Later

Touka stood outside Cochlea with Yomo, her rabbit mask on. They knew something was planned, and they knew it wasn’t good. They didn’t know what exactly but what Touka knew was that Hinami was in there.

Suddenly, a siren went off and the roof opened.

“What… What’s going on Yomo?” Touka asked.

“I don’t know.. But I see Banjou and other ghouls going in. Let’s go.” Yomo said, going in. Touka followed close behind him, looking around. She stopped when she saw Ayato, he was fighting alongside someone, Kaneki. This wasn’t Haise. His hair was completely black, and he acted differently. Though, they were in danger. Touka quickly went over and blocked an attack from Arima, one of the top ghoul investigators.

Though, her mask was knocked off. Touka and Kaneki made eye contact, “Kaneki…” Touka said.

Kaneki gave her a nod, “Hello Touka.”

“I’ll see you soon… Just don’t die.” She smiled a bit.

“I’ll try. Hinami is through that hall.” Kaneki explained, point to a hallway to the left.

Touka nodded, helping Ayato not get killed before running to the hall with Yomo. She saw Hinami, running over and pulling her into a hug.

“Big sister!”

“Hey there… I missed you.” Touka said. “But, we need to get out of here. Come on.” Touka explained as she led Hinami out, getting her back to :re after a bit of struggling to get out. There were so many doves, so she had to be very careful getting out of there with Hinami. Yomo stayed to fight.

The night passed quickly, no Kaneki. Not yet anyways. She hoped he was okay, that he hadn’t died on her.

Touka heard the bell on the door, looking up she saw Yomo. “Where’s Kaneki?”

“I don’t know. He killed Arima and disappeared.I haven’t seen him since.” Yomo explained.

Touka sighed, nodding. She looked at the door as it opened again. It was Kaneki, he was back. Though, he was injured. He had a large gash in his stomach, cuts all over his body.

“Let’s get you upstairs, I’ll clean you up.” Touka went upstairs, Kaneki following. He sat on the bed as Touka got some flesh for him, then getting some paper towels to wipe away the blood.

Touka handed him the flesh and sat next to him after Kaneki took his shirt off. Touka cleaned the blood around the wounds once Kaneki began eating and healing.

“Thank you, Touka.” Kaneki whispered, looking at her. He felt weak.

“No problem, just don’t disappear on me again. Then don’t forget your life and come back as this random person named Haise.”

“Touka I had no control over it.”

“Says the asshole who joined Aogiri and left. You changed and you left with no warning. Last time I saw you, you were walking down a street exposing your face to ever ghoul investigator in Tokyo, not giving a damn if you die.” Touka mumbled, sharing her true feelings about the entire situation.

“I left to protect you. To gain strength so I could protect you and the others. Things just got out of hand.”

“Out of hand? They got more than out of hand. You fucking left Kaneki… You left and didn’t even say goodbye. Then once you left and disappeared for good, Hinami got in Aogiri and got locked up in Cochlea. Luckily you came to your senses and got her out of there.”

“Calm down.”

“Don’t tell me to calm down. You don’t need to be telling me what to do.”

“Touka-” He held her shoulders as he looked into her eyes. “Calm. Down.” He said seriously.

Touka felt her anger slow down and go away. She just looked away, keeping him out of her sight.

“I’m sorry, okay? I just wanted to protect you guys but something happened. Hell, I don’t even know what happened. I just know I lost my memory and found out things I never even knew. I’m not exactly proud of what I did but I didn’t have to come back. Yet I did, because of you. Because of everyone else, but you mainly. I’m not asking you to forgive me, but to know why I did leave, why I actually came back.”

Touka inhaled a shaky breath, “I cared about you Kaneki. More than I should have. Then all that happened with Jason, I came for you but I didn’t get there in time. Ayato stopped me, then you told me you were joining Aogiri and it broke me more than it should have. Then… Then I saw you as this different person and you didn’t even know who I was. It hurt, Kaneki.”

“Did you just admit you liked me?” Kaneki asked with a small smile, “And still do?”

Touka’s cheeks turned a light shade of pink, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She muttered, turning away again.

“Well, in any case I liked you too. Still do. Take time to calm down, I’ll help out at this cafe from now on, so don’t think I’m leaving again.” Kaneki gave her a small smile, walking away.

Touka couldn’t help but to smile a little bit, Kaneki was back. He was back for good, or at least she thought so. She hoped so.

“Big sister.” Hinami peeked in.

“Yes?”

“Is big brother really back?”

Touka nodded, “As far as I know.”

This made Hinami smile. She hoped he was too, after her mom died she looked to Kaneki and Touka a lot. Then Kaneki disappeared and Touka focused on more, so she went and joined Aogiri, wanting to also find Kaneki. It just ended up with her getting locked in Cochlea. Kaneki did get her out however, and she was very grateful.

“Thank you.” Hinami said, walking out.

Touka changed and laid back, letting out a little sigh. She was wondering how it must feel to not remember the people you knew before. It couldn’t have been easy, and now just remembering, did he feel bad? Touka figured she made him feel guilty about it all, and she didn’t mean to. She was just so upset, she needed to release her feelings. Though, it wasn’t in the best way.

Touka cared about Kaneki, the last thing she wanted to do was to make him feel like he was in the wrong. Was he when he left for Aogiri? Yes, but it wasn’t his fault he lost his memory, that was the thing she wanted him to know she forgave him for. Making him feel in the wrong, it made her feel bad.

Touka fell asleep, letting her body relax.

---

The next morning, Touka woke up. Yawning, she looked around. She saw a note on her bedside table, it seemed like Kaneki’s hand writing.

Touka,

I’m sorry for breaking my promise, but I must do this. I have to leave again to protect those at the CCG. I still do like them, please forgive me. I swear to you I will be back for you because I do love you. More than anyone. I’ll come see you soon. Goodbye.

-Kaneki Ken

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i-write-fanfics-to-procrastinate · 5 years

Note

Headcanon where Natsu moves to the other side of the country for college and doesn’t see Lucy again for a year. They keep in contact but it’s not the same. And before he left they both knew they had feelings for one another but never confessed. Natsu comes back for break and they spend 24/7 together. Their feelings for each other are still in the air but Natsu has a girlfriend now

Oof.This really hurts, anon. But I decided to write a little something for itbecause I really like the idea. Hmm… reminds me a little of 100 Year Quest. Whois Touka anyways? And why does she keep trying to steal Lucy’s man? :P

It wasn’t writtenin the stars. It had been nine monthssince Lucy Heartfilia had laid eyes on him. He had been away for so long,chasing a scholarship and his dreams. They had talked, of course. Every sooften they’d spend long hours texting back and forth, joking about the past,making small talk. He’d tell her about the essay he was working on, theresearch he had to do. She’d joke about the things she had to do for her lastyear of high school. Now it was Summer. They were both on break. And Lucy wassitting in a café, waiting for him.

She was nervous, and she knew why.Cana had been teasing her about it all night the night before. “Ooh! Natsu’s back in town, Lu! Are you twofinally going to make it official?” But it wasn’t like that. Lucy knew thatonce, when they were younger, Natsu had feelings for her—just like she hadalways harbored feelings for him. But that time had passed. They had missedtheir chance. Now they lived in what felt like two different worlds. They couldnever be together. It wasn’t meant to be.

The door to the air-conditioned shopopened and the hot summer breeze hit Lucy only moments later. She wrapped ahand around her frappuccino, letting the cold on her hands refresh her. That’swhen she noticed who had come in. Natsu Dragneel. He was just as she imaginedhim, even if his hair was a little longer. His eyes searching for her. She lethim look for a half a moment, admiring him from afar before she caught herself.I can’t think about things like this now!She waved her hand just as he spotted her, and his bright, signature grinappeared, chasing away any anxiety that still spun Lucy’s stomach into knots.

“Natsu!” She laughed, “It’s so greatto see you!”

He seemed his usual self, he slippedinto the chair across from her. “How long has it been?”

“Too long!” Lucy sighed, leaningback in her chair. “since you left—nine months ago. Do you want something todrink?”

“Nah,” Natsu smiled, “I just want totalk to you.” Lucy felt a blush rise in her cheeks, but she pushed it away. It was never meant to be. He’s just afriend.

They talked for hours in the café. Atfirst, it was all good. Natsu told Lucy about his classes, about what grades hegot in the Spring Quarter. How he felt like he really belonged at the college,it was a good fit for him. He asked Lucy all about where she was planning to goto college. Her answer was the same it had been when they first parted ways lastyear—the community college, here… home. She wouldn’t have to leave her friends,the place she grew up. The community college offered her everything she wanted.When she reminded him he looked almost disappointed, as if he had expected herto follow him across the world.

Then it got worse. Natsu told herabout his friends, about the people he had met at college, and Lucy felt more separatedfrom him than she ever had. We really areliving different lives.

“And then…” Natsu hesitated. The caféwas nearly empty. It was late afternoon. The sun was casting odd shadows on theback wall. It was hot. “There’sTouka.”

“Touka?” Lucy frowned. She leaned in,over her empty cup—her Frappuccino finished a long time ago. “Who’s Touka?”

�� Natsu’s face was red, he wassquirming in his seat, refusing to make eye contact. “She’s… my girlfriend… Iguess.” Girlfriend?! Lucy’s heartskipped a beat. She remembered, last summer, what Cana had said, grabbing hershoulders firmly and practically shouting: “Lucy!Don’t you understand? If you don’t confess to him right now he’s going to gooff to college and find another girl, and then you’ll never be together!”

Cana’s prediction was reality. Shewas usually right, and this time was no different. It’s over, Lucy. He’s really gone for good. But Natsu’s bodylanguage said something completely different. He didn’t want to talk about Touka.Was he embarrassed? Or was it something else.

She realized she had been silent forfar too long. “Congratulations,Natsu! You’ll have to tell me all about her.”

“I will…” Natsu trailed off, hiseyes finally meeting hers. “Someday. Right now I don’t want to talk aboutcollege. Let’s go for a walk.” Twodifferent worlds.

They found themselves walkingthrough the park in the center of town just as the sun was setting. The air wascooling off in the light of twilight. The world was quiet. Lucy could see a fewlone people. Someone was walking their dog after work. Someone else was justleaving the playground with their little girl, to be home before dark. As theywalked Natsu shoved his hands in his pockets, trying to look carefree.

“There’s something bothering you,”Lucy said.

“You know me too well,” Natsusighed, pausing in the middle of the path through the park to turn and faceher.

“Of course,” Lucy said, offering hima little smile, “We practically grew up together. We’re best friends, aren’twe?”

“Always,” Natsu nodded, but he didn’tmeet her eyes. He was hiding something. He had done the same thing when Lucyasked about Touka. He didn’t want to talk about it.

“Natsu, what’s going on?”

“The truth is… I don’t really knowwhere I belong. I’m all talk.” He looked towards where the sun was setting, atortured expression crossing his face. “I like college, and I like the friendsI’ve made there… mostly. But… I miss this place.”

“Well, you’re here for the whole summer,aren’t you?” Lucy smiled.

“Yeah, I guess so. But… there’s somethingelse.” Natsu narrowed his eyes, still not looking at her. Lucy felt her stomachgo into knots again.

“What?”

“I miss you.” The silence that met his words was deafening. Lucy felt likeshe couldn’t breathe. What did he just say?

“R-right. Well, I miss you too. Afterall, we are best—”

“No, not like that. I don’t think Ireally wanted to pay attention to it. Not until I started going out with Touka.She’s really nice, Lu, and pretty. At first it was okay. Then I startedthinking, she’s really nice. She’s reallypretty. But… she’s not Lucy.” Lucy felt sick.

“Wh-what… what are you saying?”

“What I should have said a year ago.Hell, what I should have said yearsago, when I first realized that… I’m in love with you.”

“N-Natsu…You know I’ve always likedyou…”

“Can I kiss you?” His questionstunned her, and she couldn’t move as he leaned closer—hardly waiting for aresponse. That was Natsu. So headstrong, stubborn, impatient. Their lips met,gently at first, but charged with sudden confidence and hunger, Natsu deepenedtheir kiss, pulling her into an irreversible predicament. He loves me. He loves me. And she realized, as he wrapped an armaround her waist, pulling her closer against his chest, that she loved him too.

When he pulled away, they were bothbreathless—Lucy clutching Natsu’s shirt, and Natsu’s eyes turned golden by the lightof the setting sun. He was so handsome, so close…

“W-what about Touka?” Lucywhispered. Natsu shook his head.

“She’s not you.”

“You’re… You’re going to break upwith her.”

“I have to, Lucy. I can’t stand it. Everytime I’m with her, I can only think of you.”

“W-what about college?”

“Long distance has worked before.Besides, I’ll come visit you every break.And you can come visit me sometimes too.”

She wasn’t totally convinced, but atthis rate she didn’t care. Her heart was pounding in her chest, she felt sorelieved, the knots in her stomach gone. Natsu Dragneel loved her. And they had all Summer to figure it out.

“I love you too.” She whispered.Natsu grinned, a glint of victory shining in his eyes. She loved his smile, theway he paraded each triumph. This time she pulled him into a kiss by his shirt,making sure to memorize his warmth, the way he held her. This was meant to be. She smiled against his lips. This was written in the stars.

#ft #fairy tail #nalu #natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia #natsu x lucy #lucy x natsu #fairytail #myfic #headcanon #iwritefanfictiontoprocrastinate

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emilx311 · 5 years

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As a dragon Tobirama was used to being hated and feared and chased away from the children he only wanted to teach. When he is discovered with his latest batch of students he is prepared for the same thing to happen. Madara however, has different plans.

Written for MadaTobi week Fantasy and Creatures. I may end up coming back to play around in this universe more as I had a few ideas that didn't make it into this fic.

If you enjoy my work please consider supporting it by buying me a coffee

Tobirama has lived a long life. In that time, he has seen and learned many things. It would be hard not to as he had made it his mission to learn as much as he possibly can. He has also passed that knowledge on to as many as he can. As much as he values the things he has learned, he values the chance to pass the, on more, much to the irritation of many. He really did not see what the other races found so objectional about his habit of teaching, but their reactions were extremely irritating. He had to work hard to bury his instincts every time the adults dragged his students away and banned them from ever seeing him again. Separating a dragon from its hoard was always dangerous after all, though given his nature, Tobirama knew he would always have to be different. As much as he wanted to, he knew that he couldn’t just kidnap his students. They needed their homes and families and other things he just could not provide to them in order to thrive. Because of this he had forced himself to develop an almost unheard-of amount of control over himself.

Everyone knew that dragons had a hoard that they guarded with deadly force. Everyone knew that to touch a dragon’s hoard was tantamount to suicide. This was, on the whole, true. What was not true was the perception other species had that all dragons hoarded things like gold and precious gems which they hid in caverns. What was not true was the assumption that if you saw a dragon you were close to its hoard and in extreme danger of being attacked. It was the rise of these ideas that had his kin hiding further and further away from the world with every passing year.

The reality of it was that, like with other species, each dragon was different-in hoard and in temperament. Once they hit puberty, young dragons would begin to feel the urge to hoard, what they then began to collect was unique to each dragon. Something in them would tell them what they needed to collect, and once they had enough of it, dragons would move out of their parent’s dens to create their own. There was no real way to tell what a dragon would be driven to hoard when they reached this stage, though sometimes an educated guess could be made.

His elder brother Hashirama, for example, had always been drawn to the forest. Their parents always had to fight to get Hashirama to return to their mountain den at night. So, it had surprised no one when he began collecting and growing saplings. He was now the proud owner of a huge forest filled with all sorts of plants and animals in addition to his trees. The first ones he’d collected were all planted around the meadow he and his mate slept in, near the very center of the forest.

Mito, Hashirama’s mate, was a water dragon. She hoarded seals, and books on sealing (she also had lots of ink, brushes, and paper, but that was more for practicalities sake than instinct). These she hid in a cave hidden by a small spring near his brother’s meadow. Tobirama had never seen her full collection, though they would occasionally do trades.

His cousin, Touka, had ended up the opposite of his brother when it came to her hoard. Everyone had assumed she would hoard naginatas, or at least weaponry, given her love of them. Instead she had begun hoarding calendars, though she claimed they hadn’t felt quite right, they were the best she could find to appease her instincts. This was solved a few years ago when she had noticed other species with boards and calendars which read X days since Y. Something had clicked, and soon her walls were covered with these. In typical Touka fashion she had proceeded to use them to mock the rest of them by filling them with captions such as “Since Hashirama apologized to a twig”, or “Since Tobirama’s lab blew up”. The worst apart was that she made sure to keep them accurate and up-to-date (Tobirama suspected Mito may have made her some seals to help with that).

His own hoarding of knowledge was not a surprise to his family, though his hoarding of students was. He had, for a time, tried simply seeking out knowledge, but it had quickly become clear that this was not enough for his instincts. Some inner part of him screamed that his knowledge needed to be shared. Screamed as it saw children of all species left unable to so much as spell their own names. Intelligent children who could do so much with the things he knew. Tobirama was unable to do anything but give in to that voice. And so, no matter how often it ended in anger and pain, he continued to seek out students to teach over and over again. He couldn’t bring himself to regret doing so even as the pattern seemed set to continue to repeating itself.

He certainly couldn’t bring himself to regret his current set of students, spread out around him. Six children from the village down the hill from their current location or the surrounding clans. Hiruzen was a skinchanger from a clan of them. His alternate form was a monkey, and he loved to swing through the trees no matter which form he was in. Torifu was part giant. Though he was still small, Tobirama was sure he would grow as tall and strong as the rest of his clan. Homura, Koharu, and Danzo were all human and Tobirama refused to tolerate anyone calling them lesser for it. Humans were just as important to the world as any other species and deserved as much respect and consideration as any other. Finally, the last member of the group was Kagami, a young phoenix from the Uchiha clan. He was a hyper and happy youngster, always hoping around and ready with a joke and a laugh. Quite different from his solemn and reserved clansmen who Tobirama had observed on occasion over the years.

No, he could not regret taking the chance to teach these six. Could not regret answering their questions. Could not regret telling them tales from lands far away. Could not regret teaching them about the forests, about the trees and plants that could heal and hurt. Could not regret the practical and survival tips he had given them. Could not regret encouraging their curiosity and drive. Could not regret the chance to impart a bit of his precious knowledge to others who could use it. He wishes, as he always does, that he could have had longer with them, that he could have taught them more, but he cannot-does not-regret choosing to teach them in the first place. Does not regret it even as he meets wide black eyes with red flames hidden within from across the clearing. Does not regret even as he stares at the one who will take these six away and cause him so much pain.

He knew, of course, that the adult phoenix would be able to tell what he was at a glance. Even in his humanoid form the telltale signs of his species were impossible to ignore. The long, curled horns poking up through his hair, his eyes with elongated pupils which he knew practically glowed with all the intensity of a dragon’s love for their hoard, not to mention his distinct markings. Though most of those were hidden under the simple long-sleeved shirt and pants he wore but the three on his face stood out starkly against his pale skin. There was nothing he could do about them. Just as the Uchiha could not hide or smother the flames that burned within them dragons were unable to disguise the marks of their nature. If you knew what to look for, and most did, it was always obvious when a dragon was about. Which, of course, did nothing to help their persecution and isolation.

Tobirama breathed deeply and prepared himself for the inevitable pain and separation that was to come. He pushed down his instincts, the part of him that growled to change forms and take his students away to his den where he would be free to protect and teach them without interruptions. He firmly repeated to himself all the reasons why that was a bad idea as he waited for the explosion that always followed an adult’s discovery of his teaching, but it never came. The Uchiha seemed stunned. All he did was stand silently and stare at him. Tobirama was rather disconcerted by it (and also slightly concerned honestly). The silence stretched on lone enough for the children to notice the arrival of the second adult.

“Madara-shishou?” Kagami asked in confusion after he had turned to see what his teacher was looking at. He tilted his head in a silent question, what was his mentor and clan head doing all the way out here?

“Brat”, Madara managed to shake himself out of his shock, “you’re supposed to tell someone where you’re going when you leave the compound”. He gave his younger clansmen a stern look with that reminder, it was for his own safety after all. The boy did at least look slightly abashed at that.

“But I was with my friends! And Tobirama-sensei, who’s an adult, was here the whole time to watch us so it was safe!” Kagami protested. Madara rolled his eyes.

“Perhaps so, but we didn’t know that did we?” He pressed the younger.

“Oh…I’m sorry for worrying you shishou!” Kagami declared, sounding honestly contrite about it. He was not a bad child, Madara knew, he just got overexcited.

“It’s alright, but do try to remember in the future. Now, why don’t you introduce me to this teacher of yours, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen him around before” Madara commented, his eyes once again seeking Tobirama out.

“Right! Madara-shishou this is Tobirama-sensei. He’s been teaching us a whole bunch of cool stuff! Sensei, this is Madara-shishou, he’s the head of my clan!” Kagami was practically vibrating with happiness about being able to introduce two of his favourite people. Tobirama hated to think of how disappointed the boy was going to be when this meeting ended with him never being allowed to see Tobirama again.

“Thank you Kagami” he said, giving the boy a gentle smile and ruffling his curly hair. “Now, it’s almost dinner time so you and your friends should be heading home while Uchiha-sama and I have a quick chat”. He made sure to keep the smile on his face as he shoed his students back towards the village ignoring the familiar pang of pain the separation brought him.

“Madara” the man next to him spoke up. He turned to the phoenix in surprise and confusion, only to see a light blush spread out over his cheeks. “Please, there’s no need for the formality, just call me Madara”.

“Madara” Tobirama agrees, noting the small shiver the other gives when he does. He feels wrong-footed and more than a little confused. Being civil when the children were around made sense, he wouldn’t have wanted to alarm them after all. But they were gone now, so where was the yelling? The demands for him to leave the children alone? The threats of what would be done to him if he ever dared come near them? Those were what he was expecting, what he had always been faced with in the past, so he has no idea how to react when Madara just smiles at him.

“You have a beautiful voice” comes out of his mouth and Madara is horrified. He’d meant to say something cool and intelligent, something befitting his position as Uchiha clan head, but his brain seemed to have decided to desert him. This was not what he’d been expecting when he’d followed Kagami to find out where the brat had been sneaking away to lately. His first glimpse of the man had taken his breath away, even though the other had been facing away from him. Wanting some time to compose himself and also to observe what was going on. Even with his immediate attraction he was very aware that the being was a strange adult who was along with a bunch of children including one from his clan. No matter how beautiful his figure lithe figure may be, Madara wouldn’t hesitate to kill the other if he had done anything to harm any of the children.

It became quickly apparent that this was not at all the case. All six of the children visibly adored him, talking over each other to tell “sensei” what had been happening lately. The other man had laughed, a sound that seemed to reverberate straight through Madara’s core, and had kindly scolded them to take turns. He sat them down in a circle, a change in position which revealed his face to the phoenix for the first time. Madara is fairly sure his heart honestly stopped for a few moments at the sight of it. The horns had told him that the other was not human from the start, but now he could tell that the other was, of all things, a dragon! (Could share his lifespan, wouldn’t loose him, a voice deep inside him whispered.) He was also the most beautiful creature Madara had ever laid eyes on, and he could only imagine how much more amazing the other’s true form must be.

Gleaming curved ivory horns stuck out of soft looking silver hair that almost matched them in shade. A narrow, delicate face with full pink lips and sharp silver brows lay under that, the features only enhanced by the three deep red lines painted on them. Lines the same colour as the dragon’s eyes. Deep ruby orbs that shone with all the passion his species were known for, but which were also soft with affection and pride for the children in front of him as he praised their accomplishments and patiently answered their questions.

Madara was honestly not sure how long he’d been watching them for before his body decided on its own to step out into the clearing. His inner flame had been twisting inside of him, trying to reach out, to claim this beautiful perfect creature he had found. And then, those eyes he’d been admiring had met his and it had been all he could do to hold onto his form. All he could do to stop the flames inside him from rushing up to consume him and renew him to his true form of air and fire, to soar out of those flames and scream his find and his claim for all to hear. Even now he could still feel the flame in him flickering at his skin in an attempt to escape.

“Er, thank you?” Tobirama replied, not really sure what else he could have said to that. He really was feeling very wrong-footed at the moment. He had expected yelling and threats; he was used to yelling and threats. He was not used to receiving compliments, especially not from adults of other species. Hell, he couldn’t remember the last time a non-dragon adult had had a peaceful conversation with him! (There were a few exceptions, griffins for example got along well with dragons but few other species did.) Deciding he would really rather get this over and done with so he could go safely let his irritation, anger, and pain out before licking his metaphorical wounds, he tried to prompt the other back on track. “You want to talk about Kagami and the others I assume?” This, thankfully, did seem to shake the phoenix out of his trance…at least mostly.

“Oh, um, Kagami? Kagami, yes!” He stutters out before clearing his throat and trying again for something more cohesive (how was he supposed to focus on words with his fire licking his limbs with delicious warmth as they reached out for the other?). “I mean, yes, if you have a minute, I would very much appreciate that” he amended, pleased with himself for actually making sense. Tobirama nodded slowly. That was, again, not what he was expecting-which seemed to be becoming a theme with the phoenix.

“Of course,” he responded, tilting his head towards the other and silently urging him to get on with it.

“Oh um, well, Tobirama-may I call you Tobirama?” Madara paused long enough for the dragon to nod. “Tobirama” he repeated, just to taste the feel of it on his lips, “Tobirama I would very much appreciate it if you could give me a quick summary of what you have been teaching Kagami and the others. And, if possible, we could try to make some of it align more closely with what he is being taught by others. Also, it would be good to find a permanent time for you to meet, and perhaps arrange for a meeting place a bit closer to the village? You can continue meeting here if you’re more comfortable with that, but it would be nice to have the children closer in case anything happens. Oh, and um, the elders will likely want another adult to sit in on your lessons for awhile, just to be sure everything is okay. Because they’re paranoid and don’t really know you, not because you’re doing anything wrong or because you’re untrustworthy! Because you seem very kind and good with them and…” Madara trailed off, his blush returning full force. He’d started off so well, but he didn’t want Tobirama to think that Madara thought he was doing anything wrong! He flicked a glance at the dragon and found him looking shocked, as though Madara had struck him, not just asked him about some logistical matters.

“Are you, um, are you okay? If something I said would cause a problem, we can likely work something else out” he tried to reassure the other, reaching out but stopping short of actually touching. Tobirama, meanwhile, blinked wide red eyes and wondered if he was dreaming.

“You-you’re not telling me to never come near them again? You want to let me keep teaching them? You do know what I am don’t you? You can’t have missed it!” Tobirama’s words were barely above a whisper and were coloured with old pain and suppressed hope. Madara felt his own heart ache in sympathy while his flames flared again, this time accompanied by the urge to hunt down anyone who had ever hurt the other and drown them in fire. ‘Later’ he promised himself, for now he had to reassure Tobirama that he would not be another to hurt him.

“No, I’m not. I watched you with the children today”, he refused to be ashamed of protecting his clan, and especially Kagami. Somehow, he knew that Tobirama would understand. “And they clearly all but worshiped you. It was also clear how much you cared for them in turn. You were kind and patient and encouraged them to learn and question. You push them, but do not get angry if they fall, and instead you help them to stand again even more strongly. I saw nothing to make me think that you would ever harm them. Instead, I saw many things that showed how much of a positive influence you are on them. Why would I separate Kagami from someone who both encourages him and actively helps him to be better? As I said, the elders will probably want another adult to observe for a time to be absolutely sure, but I wouldn’t just cut you off without cause!” Madara harrumphed and crossed his arms at the end of his impassioned speech. Tobirama was looking at him with awe and growing hope, but there was one thing the phoenix had not mentioned which still made him warry of trusting Madara’s words.

“Most would consider my species cause enough to chase me away” he forced himself to say, watching the other’s reaction closely. Madara’s eyes flashed red visibly with fire and made a noise of contempt.

“Most people are idiots. Dragons are only dangerous if you provoke them first. The chance to learn from a creature as old and wise as you is an opportunity few could ever dream of and ought to be treasured as such!” The phoenix grumbled. Most species could be dangerous, could cause harm if they really wanted to! Dragons could certainly be very dangerous, but they were still sentient beings and deserved the respect other species took for granted!

Tobirama stared at the huffing phoenix before him, angry not at him but on his behalf, and felt something shift within him. The other male was beautiful, he noticed distantly under the waves of relief crashing through him. He was tall and broad with clear muscles defining his body. His pale skin was off-set by his dark eyes (which, as Tobirama had noticed earlier, glowed with his inner flames) and his absolute main of black hair which hung long and wild down his back. He had already shown he had all the passion and fire his kind were known for, and protective instincts that would do any dragon proud. He cared for his family, but was not rash, as shown by how he’d observed and gotten a feel for what was happening before revealing himself to Tobirama. And, most important to his draconic instincts, the phoenix had been close to his hoard but had not taken from it, had in fact found a way to help Tobirama keep it!

‘Helped use keep what is ours’ his instincts whispered to him. ‘Helped protect our hoard. Trustworthy, smart, strong, a good mate’ they insisted. ‘Claim, mate, keep’ they urged him, insisting the other had already shown his willingness by protecting their hoard. Tobirama was thankful for his practice and control since he was well aware that the other had no idea what he’d just down and how significant it was to his kind. He couldn’t simply lunge over and bite his claim unto the phoenix, no matter how much he may want to. His instincts were right that the other would make a wonderful mate.

“Thank you” he said, reaching out to grab and squeeze Madara’s hand. He made sure to meet the other’s eyes so that the phoenix would be able to see his sincerity. “Really, thank you. I do not know that there are words able to express the true depth of what you have just done for me. You have shown me kindness where no other ever has, and no matter how long the years of my life I will not forget it. I am happy to agree to your conditions; I only hid my lessons because I believed that I would be driven away. The only thing I would request is that you be the one to accompany the children to their lessons. You have proven yourself to be fair in judgement and not inclined to rashness. Also, it is selfish, but I would very much like the chance to get to know you more, and if you would permit it, to court you.” Tobirama knew he was blushing terribly by the time he was done, but he had always believed it better to be honest and straight forward about things.

Madara stared at him, at this beautiful creature that care so for a member of his clan, and who was thanking him for the chance to continue to do so. Who had apparently been driven away from others he had cared for so often he felt he had to hide. At the dragon that made his flames sing as no one ever had. At the man who had easily agreed to all his conditions in order to keep teaching his charges. At the one his soul desired who wished to spend more time with him. Who trusted him over others! Who had just asked for the chance to court him. Triumph and glee flared through him. He knew that his form was wavering slightly and that the bottom of his hair was starting to smoke, but he could not care less. His grin widened even more as he took the hand holding his and weaved their fingers together.

“I would love nothing more than to get to know you, but there is no need for you to court me. My flame and my soul have burned for you since I first saw you with the children earlier. If you would have me, they will burn for you until the flame is no more” he swore to Tobirama. The dragon would not recognize the traditional phoenix vow meant to be given to the mate their instincts chose, but he could clearly understand the weight the words carried. Tobirama took Madara’s other hand in his and made his own vow.

“You have protected what is precious to me without greed or incentive. You have proven yourself more than worthy of being my mate. I would have you and mark you as mine to possess and protect as fiercely as I do my hoard. I would give you everything I have and am, and take all you have and are as mine in return until my heart no longer beats to love it and my body cannot move to defend it”. As with Tobirama, Madara did not recognize the words themselves, but could tell from the power and gravity of them what they were.

Magic and fire flashed from their combined hands once Tobirama finished speaking, marking the moment their vows were burned into their very souls. A moment later Tobirama was lunging forward and sinking his fangs into the phoenix’s neck, leaving his permanent mark and claim on the man that was now his mate. He stepped back just as Madara finally lost the battle he’d been waging with his flames. They burst out of him, erupting everywhere and burning anything close to him to ash except for Tobirama. The dragon was now tied to Madara and his flames could and would never do him any harm. He emerged from the flames in bird form and used the moment from the explosion to push him higher as he screamed. He screamed out his victory and his triumph to the skies before swooping back down to swirl around his mate, trailing flames which did no more than tickle the dragon as he went. Tobirama laughed in elation at the display before copying his new mate and transforming. He let loose a roar to match Madara’s as he launched himself into the air to join the phoenix in the skies.

#madatobiweek2019 #MadaTobi #Madara #Tobirama #Fantasy and Creatures #Hashirama #Mito #Kagami #Touka #Hiruzen #Danzo #Koharu #Homura #Torifu #Dragon Tobirama #Phoenix Uchiha

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