#i hope bernard sticks around and they get to be a thing for a while i feel like their relationship has a lot of fun and sweet potential | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

skylarsblue · 2 years

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May I request the slashers with a s/o that has an angry pet chihuahua that is so like confusing one minute they are laying on the couch with its fatass with derpy look on its face and then suddenly bite the fuck out of anyone and their s/o is like "awwwww my baby *kiss*" and the slasher is like wtf crazy ass rabies infested dog.. imagine the chihuahua biting s/o and they are just like babying it

Ps. I love the micheal myers fic you wrote 💓

One, thank you! Two, the images I got from this request were fuckin' hilarious, so thank you again. Michael Myers (OG)

He's gonna try to kill it. I'm sorry, he already hates dogs, this man is gonna see your little rat pup and immediately try to stab it. God forbid it starts doing that high-pitched yapping bark.

Now, if you manage to convince him to not kill your dog, by some miracle, he's still going to utterly despise it. Nothing will get him to like this dog. And he will never understand why you love it so much. Michael could somewhat understand if it was one of those big fluffy ones. Even he can admit that a Saint Bernard is cute, but this?

Honestly, you lose respect points every time you coo over it. On top of that, every time you give the dog affection, he's gonna hate it even more. Not only is it annoying but it also steals your love. He despises this dog. He hates it so much.

If the dog bites him, I pray you're there, because otherwise it's getting flung aggressively. If it hits something and gets hurt, Michael will give zero fucks. He'll hope it dies, honestly. However, if it bites someone else? Specifically, someone who interacts with you while you're out and about? Now that, he'll enjoy. The more damage is done, the better. It's the only time he'll be on your dog's side. If it happens frequently, he might come to tolerate your canine friend a bit more. But only because seeing people trying to talk to you end up losing a finger to something so tiny is funny.

(Oh also, Peepaw Myers is just gonna kill your dog. Straight up, it's dead, no negotiating. Sorry bro. More under the cut.)

Michael Myers (RZ)

While this version of Michael is a bit more tolerant of dogs, it does not mean he likes chihuahuas. He doesn't. Michael hates many things and your dog is likely one of them.

Problem one is the barking. Michael is prone to headaches & migraines, in which he gets very sensitive to light & sound, and the octave in which most small dogs start yapping is the worst to his ears. It genuinely hurts him. Problem two, dogs don't do Michael. Dogs just don't like him or his energy, so there's a good chance that him showing up will get your dog barking. Not only does it give him away, but again, his ears.

He's probably gonna try & kill it, honestly. It annoys him so much. Now, he'll be a bit more willing to listen when you beg him not to, but it's only because he loves you. He knows you love your pet, even if he utterly despises it. If you want to up the chance of your little pal not being crushed to death, be sure to smother Mikey in love before you even think about petting your pup in front of him. If it's gonna stick around, it has gotta be clear that Michael is the receiver of the majority of your love. He will not stand to be second place to your dog.

When your relationship is fresh, if your dog bites him, it'll be the same outcome as OG Myers. It's getting flung. However, if he's been around your dog more often? Eventually, he'll stop caring. It's not like it hurts all that bad anyway. Is it annoying to have a rat dog attached to your hand? Yes, but it's your dog, and Michael's just gotta deal with it. Maybe give ol' Mikey a treat for being nice to your puppy, he deserves it with all the patience he needs to show.

Thomas Hewitt

Thomas doesn't really care. Dogs are cool! He likes dogs! Though, if he's being honest, he's not entirely sure why you chose this breed. They're tiny and they can't do much. But, he doesn't make any comments on it. Especially since Uncle Monty has a smaller dog.

When it starts barking, it doesn't bother Tommy as much. Honestly, who you need to be worried about is Hoyt. Because good ol' "sheriff" will absolutely try and kill your dog. If he's successful, he'll make you eat it because he's a sadistic asshole. Thomas doesn't mind because he's used to blocking out noise. Does he like it? No, but he can deal with it. Sometimes it comes in handy. Like when a meal manages to get free or if someone ends up trying to break in. Tiny dogs can be good alarm systems.

If your dog bites Thomas, he won't be too upset. He expects it, actually. Thomas is big and naturally threatening. On top of that, his hands usually have remnants of meat/blood on them. For all he knows, your dog just thinks he's food. If your dog is the type to play bite? It'll take Tommy a bit to understand it's playing, but once he knows, he finds it endearing. He'll offer the pup his finger to nibble on and pull at.

Thomas isn't the type to necessarily get jealous over your affection for the dog. He does want to know you love him too though, so he might get a bit of a sad expression if you choose to coo over your puppy when he's in the room. Make sure to turn to him and give him affection too! He doesn't mind your love for your pet though, in fact, it's probably what keeps your dog alive. Hoyt won't touch the dog if Thomas makes it clear that your pet is off-limits. He doesn't want you sad because someone hurt your puppy pal.

Bubba Sawyer

Your dog is gonna love Bubba. It doesn't matter how hostile your dog is, every animal on earth loves Bubba. He is Snow White. Now that says nothing about Nubbins, Chop-Top, or Drayton. Your dog will likely hate them, but, it'll love Bubba.

Bubba loves any animal! Your tiny rat dog is no exception. Though, they do get a bit anxious with something so small roaming around. He constantly worries that he'll step/sit/crush your little friend without noticing. It's probably best to keep your dog close to you or in a specific room so Bubba doesn't go around anxious every day.

Bubba will help keep your dog from being turned into a meal. He managed to convince Drayton to leave their favorite chicken alone, I'm sure they could manage to get the family to respect your puppy. He'll certainly throw a huge fit if anyone tries to do something to your dog when you're not looking.

Since your dog will love Bubba, it's probably not going to bite him. But I can guarantee that it'll bite Chop-Top. Nubbins will likely back off when your dog gets aggressive, but C.T will actively antagonize it. Then he'll be surprised when your pup fights back. Bubba will never get onto your dog though, he always scolds the person who was bitten. It has to be their fault! Bubba knows you and your dog are angels, so it must've been something they did to get bit, obviously.

Jason Voorhees

He doesn't mind at all! A dog is a dog. However, it will catch him off guard with how much anger is in that tiny body. It's so small but so hateful! It's nothing like that one dog he met once.

Jason might get a little sad if your dog doesn't like him, but he expects it. Much like Thomas, he knows he's big & scary, of course, a small creature would be threatened. If you explain that your dog is that with everyone, he'll cheer up. Jason's just glad it's not him your dog hates.

Your dog biting him won’t affect him. Yes, it can be a bit annoying, but it doesn’t matter to him. He has a high pain tolerance. He’s been stabbed, whacked, shot at. Your chihuahua munching on his fingers is gonna do nothing. He’ll merely tilt his head and wonder what he did to piss your pooch off.

Your dog manages to be quite useful when trespassers come around. Honestly, it works just as well as the bells. It can be troublesome when Jason’s trying to sneak around, but when your dog goes nibbling at the ankles of some teens trying to get freaky, he can’t help but he proud of your pup.

Lester Sinclair

Lester loves dogs! Big or small! Now, does he favor chihuahuas? No, he much prefers bigger dogs, especially ones that are easy to train. But he’ll still love your dog, even if it’s the ugliest teacup terrier to ever exist.

This poor man tries so hard to befriend your dog and he is so sad when it doesn’t take a liking to him. He’ll do his best to convince your dog he’s a friend. Absolutely drowns it in treats. When you explain that it’s not Lester, it’s just how your dog is, he’ll still try to he the exception to the rule. He wants to be your dog’s favorite.

He doesn’t really care when he gets bitten. Sometimes he’ll pout, because again, he wants your dog to like him. But it’s not like he’ll freak out. He’s used to getting scratched or bitten by random wildlife. His hands have tons of little scars. Watching your dog bite others makes him feel a bit better about when he gets munched on. It shows that it’s not just him, your dog is just an asshole.

The fact your dog is so small gives him a bit of anxiety. He sees tons of small animals on the road, people often don’t see tiny animals, and they’ll run right over them. So, he’ll explain how he’d rather your dog stay home or in his truck. If your dog ever got out, Lester would lose sleep. He loves your dog! Even if it hates him.

Vincent Sinclair

Vincent’s pretty neutral about your dog. He’s more of a cat person, Jonesy being an exception. However, he’ll insist your dog stay out of his space, unless it’s the bedroom portion. There’s a lot of gaps and sharp things, heavy stuff that could crush a tiny dog. He’d rather your barking buddy not get in the way.

When your dog starts to go nuts, it catches Vincent off guard. They don’t expect such aggression from such a tiny creature. Especially if it’s the late night zoomies. They’ll go wide eyed, watching your dog run around with a sudden burst of energy, zooming in loops and straight lines across the house. He doesn’t know where that energy comes from and it never fails to catch him off guard.

If your dog bites him, he won’t outwardly make it a big deal, but Vincent will be noticeably more hesitant around it. They’ll try to avoid it, worried they’ll get those sharp canines stuck in their knuckles.

Don’t tell Bo this, but Vincent laughs whenever your dog bites his twin. Especially when it’s perfectly time. Like right as Bo is about to insult the dog, and your yappin’ fur baby ends up latching onto his ankle? Vincent can’t help but fight back the urge to wheeze.

Bo Sinclair

Bo doesn’t like small dogs. He’s the kind of guy to complain about any pet, but Jonesy was an exception. You dog is not. He won’t understand why you like it. It’s small, annoying, and “a little bitch” according to him.

Your dog is probably gonna bite him all the time. Bo won’t hurt your dog, but if it bites him, he might reflex kick or smack. If it hurts your dog he’ll begrudgingly apologize. He doesn’t like your dog but he’s not into hurting animals either. Bo’s still gonna be pissy that your dog bit him though.

If it was up to him, he’d get rid of your dog. He wouldn’t just drop it off on a road or something. Ideally he’d give it to Lester or a no-kill shelter. But, you love your dog, and while Bo doesn’t understand why, he’s going to keep it around for you. He’ll look out for your dog because it’s your dog. He’ll never admit to it however.

Honestly, there’s a good chance your dog might start to like Bo, in its own way. You might occasionally catch your dog taking up space in Bo’s lap, or following him around the garage. In turn, Bo will start to be attached to your dog. Of course, he knows to expect your dog’s mood swings. And he gets great joy when that rage is directed at someone else. The first time your dog bites a visitor that’s been pissing Bo off, Bo laughs so hard he nearly falls to the floor.

Billy Lenz

Billy’s more partial to cats. It’s not really about dogs because of how loud they are, they’ll bark at him and sniff out his hiding places. They’re not great for when you’re trying to remain hidden in someone else’s house. But, he does like animals. He won’t mind you having a pet.

When your dog bites at people, he finds it funny. When your dog bites you, he’ll sometimes bite you as well, as if mimicking your barking bud. However, the second your dog bites him, he throws a fit. It really upsets him.

Billy will want just as much attention, if not more, as your dog. You best make it clear that you love it. When it sees you loving on your puppy, he’ll be sure to crawl on over and shove himself in the way, demanding your affection. It’s honestly a battle between the two of them.

He doesn’t hate or love your dog. It’ll want your dog to be okay with him, but he won’t care either way. As long as you like him. It wants your attention & your affection, he honestly might compete with your dog.

(Oh also, Brahms just wouldn’t let you have the dog. That’s why I didn’t include him. Fur allergies & something taking your attention makes it a no.)

#slasher x reader #slasher community #slashers #slasher fucker #rob zombie michael myers #michael myers #jason voorhees #bubba sawyer #thomas hewitt #bo sinclair #lester sinclair #vincent sinclair #billy lenz #texas chainsaw massacre #house of wax #Friday the 13th #halloween

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gizmocrate-werecrow · 9 months

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What to do when you are a leafling: soft music and care

(I wanted to do a chapter exploring Sherry. Warning for implied death and a general sense of melancholy.)

Sherry floated over to Yonny and tapped his hand, he weakly opened his eyes and smiled.

“I-I-I guess it also affects me…”

Sherry nodded and turned to Dingo and Bernard.

“Bernard, help him up, I can bring him to our hideaway but promise to be down there straight away.” Sherry said she grabbed Yonny and they both teleported in a wisp of green light.

“Gah, this is so confusing.” Dingo said. He grabbed Bernard’s hand and they walked to the cave entrance.

“I agree. I sure hope he’s okay.” Bernard said, he tugged his stem and the ground shook.

A group of armored cannon larvae emerged from the ground.

Dingo, Bernard and Jack steadied their ground. This was going to take a while, especially with their sleep-deprived minds.

—

Down in the hideaway, Yonny was resting in a sleeping bag while Sherry tended to him, she placed an ice pack on his forehead and a thermometer in his mouth, she now wore a folded face mask over her stem.

“…”

“It’s going to be okay, as long as you’re down here nothing bad will happen. Don’t worry, your friends are coming.” Sherry said while lightly dabbing some antiseptic on Yonny’s stem.

“Th-thank you.” Yonny weakly said. He coughed and felt out the hole in his suit. He plucked the thermometer out and looked at the temperature.

“21 degrees Celsius or 70 degrees Fahrenheit core body temperature…oh no.”

“Is that bad? Did I make the ice pack too cold or something?” Sherry fretted while lifting the ice pack off.

“No no, the average core body temperature is around 36 degrees Celsius or 98.6 degrees fahrenheit, as you get lower, your bodily functions start to fail and eventually die.”

“How do you know all of this?”

“Medical school and an internship at a mortician’s”

“What’s a school? What’s a mortician?” Sherry asked, she tilted her head in an inquisitive manner.

“I will answer that later, my dear assistant. Firstly I need to go outside-“

“No! You need to rest! The sun is dangerous and you’ve been up all night!”

“So I have” Yonny yawned out, he streached and stared at his hands for a moment before laying to sleep.

Sherry let out a ghostly sigh and floated around the doctor diligently much like a guard dog would, no harm would come to Yonny as long as she was around!

An hour passed and Sherry was digging through his emergency kit, looking at all the fun trinkets that seemed to reside in there, pure white camouflaging wrap, a sticky on one side and not sticky on another strip, funny little clicky things and a small box. Sherry tilted her head and gently opened it.

The most beautiful sound came from the box, it sounded sweet yet sad. Sherry floated a little closer, noticing words engraved inside the box.

“Good luck in the rescue corps! From…i can’t read that” Sherry said, she closed the box and gently put it back into the emergency kit, same with all the other fun trinkets that Yonny kept in it.

“One day I’ll learn enough of his writing to understand, but today is a day of rest.” Sherry said. She sat on the kit and closed her eyes.

There she was, facing the horrific mixture of a beady long legs and machine, she didn’t need to worry! Papa will keep everyone safe! She, alongside the others were tossed on the monstrosity’s orb, it let out a metallic scream and shook them off, the monster’s stick pivoted and moved, whistling echoed in her ears and then…

Bang

Sherry opened her eyes to a loud bang, she froze up and curled into a ball, if she could cry like she once could, she would.

Dingo was carrying Bernard and Jack on his back, he was out of breath and had clear bags under his eyes despite the leaves, he huffed and puffed and laid Bernard down.

“Is he okay?” Sherry asked, the nightmare disappearing from her mind.

“Well it’s a pretty long story, it all started when some armored cannon larve attacked us.”

(Don’t worry, Dingos side is a whole other chapter)

#yonny pikmin #pikmin au #pikmin 4 spoilers #pikmin 4 #dingo pikmin #bernard pikmin #red pikmin #glow pikmin #fanfic

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nellie-elizabeth · 2 years

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Westworld: Metanoia (4x07)

We're back to me struggling a little bit to feel invested, which I think is a function of less focus on the intimate character connections, and more on the somewhat convoluted and yet still not very innovative worldbuilding. Still, this was not a weak installment, even if it wasn't one of my favorites!

Cons:

The moment when Bernard and Stubbs had this goodbye hug kind of made me roll my eyes, because I can't actually muster up any caring about their friendship or whatever. Their time spent together in seasons three and four was probably the part of things that dragged the most for me. Stubbs is still such a non-entity in my mind.

Something about host!William deciding to burn it all down, turn the humans against each other and undo all of Charlotte's hard work... look, I think the truth is, I'm just kind of done with William at this point! I remember what a fascinating villain he once was, as we got a peak into his past and saw him transform into the man in black. But at this point I'm so sick of him! It looks like the human version of William has been killed, so I hope that sticks, and maybe in a potential season five we can step away from relying on William as a plot device?

This isn't necessarily a "con" but more of a genuine confusion point for me... what does Teddy mean by Christina not being in the actual world? Is she in the Sublime? And for how long? Surely she's been interfacing with the human world in some capacity, right? Or has she only ever been talking to other hosts, and not actually part of human society at all? At that moment, I felt like I was supposed to be having some sort of revelation, and instead I was just scratching my head!

Pros:

Obviously satisfying to see Frankie and Caleb get some sort of reunion, even though it's this twisted parody of what it might have been. Caleb is a copy of a copy of a copy of what he once was, and he can only marvel at his daughter's presence, all while knowing that his own time in this world is pretty much over. It was an intense scene, lots of good acting, definitely worth the buildup.

Also, as much as I'm kind of annoyed with William and just done seeing him around, I did kind of enjoy watching him slaughter so many of our main characters. Obviously death doesn't quite mean the same thing in this show as it would in some others, but still, you've got Charlotte, Maeve, and Bernard all dead on the ground at the hands of William, which is bound to make next week's finale pretty dang interesting!

The whole idea of the Sublime is, on the one hand, not exactly an original one. I sort of think of it like in that movie Her, where all the artificial intelligences go off into some higher plane of existence that human minds cannot comprehend, and live out lifetimes in the blink of an eye... some sort of ultra-tech spiritual realm for the robots. So yeah, I've seen similar concepts before. But I will say I am intrigued by this idea of it as a place that one might go to and then return, as we've seen with Bernard. If Charlotte wanted to go there, because of the risk to the hosts living among humans, it was only as a temporary measure, as she does in fact want to inherit the earth in the end. Conceptually, I'm intrigued by this and can't wait to find out more!

So that's that. We only have one more episode left of the season, and I can't say I'm sorry to be saying goodbye to this world for a while. Still, this season is an improvement on the last, and there are elements that have really interested me!

7.5/10

#review #westworld #westworld review

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robiinjason · 3 years

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So happy for Tim and his new boyfriend 🥳🥳

#tim drake #bernard dowd #timber #batman urban legends #dc comics #dc fanart #toma draws #this was meant to be jokey but i went ham with bg effects so i left in a couple textless variants too kjghjg #still can't stop thinking about the news.😭 i'm so happy #i dunno if it's mostly secondhand joy from it happening along with tim's coming out or if it's bc i enjoy their dynamic but #i grew fond of timber so fast even tho i usually don't care that much abt ships kjbghb #i hope bernard sticks around and they get to be a thing for a while i feel like their relationship has a lot of fun and sweet potential #also i just saw i have exactly 1200 followers rn so lets pretend this is also a celebratory drawing for that KJFG #timbernard

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marveldc-imagines-hub · 3 years

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Subtitles: Episode 3, Now in Color

Subtitles Masterlist

Summary: Things are going well between [Y/N] and their new partners but what shenanigans will ensue as the Maximoff baby’s arrival quickly approaches and they’re pulled into the throughs of building a nursery and… child delivery?

Word count: 10,640

Warnings: Cotton candy fluff, chaos, baby. So the usual, plus babies.

Tag list: @madamevirgo @ravennight41 @multifandomgirl16 (It won’t tage you for some reason, I’m sorry ;-; ) @cyanide-mustard @badasspolygenderfriend

~~~

You huffed and sat back on your heels, slipping a sore finger into your mouth. “Stupid bird.”

The bird in question, a pink flamingo made of plastic and wire, seemed to sneer at you from its position sticking a few inches farther out of the grass than it should be. Because of this, you could still see the main stake sticking out of the bottom of the bird’s standing foot, which, much to your distaste, made the pink plastic-feathered creature look like it was trapped on a piece of wood impaled in its foot rather than lounging on one foot in the lush green grass of your yard.

You had spent a good portion of today working on your yard and garden and waiting for a member of the household across the street to step outside and beckon you over. Dressed in overalls stained by grass and dirt, a brightly colored T-shirt, a sun hat, and working shoes, you forced yourself to keep busy by planting new flora and putting down new garden fences and decor while Vision and Wanda were tucked away indoors, preparing for a baby. You were the only one so far to know about the Maximoff bun in the oven outside of the parents and although it seemed like just last week that Wanda had gotten pregnant, the baby had finally big enough that the couple had to involve a doctor to make sure all was going well.

It also felt like not long ago that the couple had asked you out for the first time. Both of them. At the same time. It was news to you that they had felt even remotely felt the same way about you as you had about them but the rest of that conversation had gone swimmingly with you being too nervous and dumbstruck to do much more than blubber questions. The first date and then the second went a similar way, with you not being completely sure that you were on a three-person date or even awake. Luckily, your new partners were just as unnerved as you were and the three of you agreed to simply play it by ear and communicate a lot.

Some time and a few sporadic dates later and things were going smoothly. Almost every bit of free time was spent at either their place or yours; if it wasn’t free time, you were giving Vision rides to work and leaving cute messages in the files you left at his desk—you always hoped they were cute, anyway, and not annoying, only to be reassured when you got a smiley back or your favorite treat from the breakroom left with the file when it was returned—or trying to help Wanda clean or cook or take a break despite her stubborn fussing against it. Vision was the first to give you a pet name, Wanda was the first to hold you in place when you attempted to pull away from a normally quick handhold or hug, and you were the first to press kisses to both their cheeks after walking them home from dinner. Wanda fell asleep on your couch first, you on theirs second, and Vision went ahead and turned cheek pecks into lip kisses. You weren’t quite ready to initiate them yourself yet but you hadn’t been complaining when Vision caught you on your porch steps and kissed you on the mouth; the rain that had just started had either been just a bonus or his initial inspiration.

As nice as everything has been, though, you were still worried about overstepping boundaries with the married couple so when Vision invited you over to be a part of the doctor visit, you politely declined. Instead, after the doctor left, you were to head over and bring your tools to help set up the nursery; it was also your joint job with Vision, who was now a baby book reading master but also increasingly bugged out about Wanda and the baby’s health, to try and convince said woman to relax for once in her life—a task difficult enough to be on the list of Hercules’ Twelve Labors, you were convinced at this point.

For now, though, you were sitting with your feet beginning to cramp and your knees getting damp and most likely more grass-stained, glaring at the devil in pink whose foot-stake had left your finger with a prick from a splinter and whose one visible dark eye stared at you with sadistic mirth.

“Oh, you wanna go, Bernard?” you scoffed at the bird-shaped plastic, dropping your hand from your mouth and pushing yourself up into a squat. “I’ll call you out. Let’s go!” You raised your hands in a fighting stance and bounced on the balls of your feet as you prepared to strike.

The sound of a chainsaw starting up caught you off guard mid-bounce and you lost your balance but what caught your eye when you twisted around while rubbing your now-bruised tailbone was Vision walking outside his front door with an older gentleman, presumably the doctor. However, you paid very little attention to said other man as you laid in the middle of your yard, twisted into what was probably a partial yoga pose, resting your chin on your arm and making lovey-dovey eyes at the former.

Not that it was surprising at all, Vision looked very nice today. He was wearing dark blue pants and a similarly colored sweater over a collared shirt and tie, with a honey-brown jacket topping everything off; you couldn’t imagine wearing a shirt plus two outerwear items in the heat of the day but you certainly didn’t mind seeing him all dressed up. His hair was somewhere between jaw and shoulder length and wavy as ever and while you weren’t a fan of the popular 70s cut, he not only pulled it off but made it look incredibly attractive. He greeted his next-door neighbor Herb, who started up the chainsaw, then spoke animatedly, as he always did, to the doctor. Talking about keeping the baby news to themselves, no doubt.

Vision watched as the doctor walked off down the sidewalk and as he happened to pass in your direction, Vision’s gaze refocused to settle on you instead. The expression on his face changed from purely friendly to something deeper and you felt the familiar flutter of butterflies in your stomach as he waved over to you.

“Hello, perfectly platonic neighbor!” he hollered, to which you responded in kind after snorting and then disentangling yourself from your strange position.

No response from Herb about the odd greeting. The cul-de-sac, and in Westview in general, people didn’t seem concerned with your trio’s out-of-place shenanigans as long as it didn’t directly affect them, you had noticed over time. You could have probably walked over and planted a brazen smooch on Vision’s perfect mouth while out in the open, with other neighbors milling about, and no one would bat an eye.

But that’s exactly what we’re not going to do, you thought stubbornly as you stood and brushed yourself off. Not yet, anyway. I want to make sure they’re both comfortable with it first.

Vision seemed to grasp what your plan was because he waited for you as you gave Bernard the flamingo a fight postpone notice and then a light kick before walking across your yard and heading across the street. If you had been more rational, you would have grabbed your tools so you could have just come inside when you reached the Maximoff house but your brain, muddled with the pink mist of freshly requited affections, could only think of getting closer to the man, maybe even holding hands or nuzzling noses.

A sound that was equal parts loud and awful caught both your and Vision’s attention as you reached the sidewalk on the other side of the street. Looking over, you both saw Herb cutting away with his chainsaw, only now he wasn’t cutting through bushes but the stone wall separating his and Wanda and Vision’s homes. The stone blocks of the wall weren’t super heavy-duty, you supposed, but the sound made you cringe, and the sight was a little jarring. Herb didn’t seem to realize was he was doing despite the lack of hedges in his path.

“Hey Herb,” Vision yelled over the noise, “think you might’ve taken the hedge trimming a little too far there, old chum!” As he spoke, he glanced over at you and, seeing you nearby, instinctively shifted in your direction; you moved to meet him halfway and you each gave the other’s hand a quick affectionate squeeze, though both pairs of eyes were trained on Herb.

Herb, who looked up, smiled, and responded, “So I have! Thanks, buddy.” Despite saying this, he continued to cut through the bordering wall and stare glassily ahead as if none the wiser.

The expression gave you an unnerving sense of familiarity but you couldn’t quite put a name to the vague memory of a person you’d seen wearing it. Acquiring a migraine medication and forcing yourself to not look too hard into every strange thing that happened in this town helped but your headaches appeared to never quite go away. This was proven by the muted throb across one side of your head that came with looking at the bizarre scene.

“Yeah,” Vision said a little quieter, “don’t mention it.”

The action only happened briefly but when you caught him chewing his lower lip, you felt your innards tie themselves in knots and had a particularly hard time tearing your gaze away. Now that you were closer, you also noticed that the blue and brown ensemble he wore perfectly matched his hair and eyes. That hair that you always desperately wanted to brush your fingers through.

Fingers carefully slipping around your hand, like if they held you any tighter your own would break, managed to catch your attention as Vision turned to lead you inside.

“Oh,” you chirped, tugging your hand back to point a thumb over your shoulder, “I forgot my tools. Meet you in a minute?”

Vision seemed persistent to bring you inside, even going so far as to catch both your arms and doing a playful series of shimmies and sways to dance the two of you closer to the front door. Now that you were out of Herb’s frozen line of sight, the two of your found yourselves standing so close together that there wasn’t a single pocket of space between your bodies. When you inhaled, you smell cologne that wasn’t too light or too heavy and a scent that you could only describe as the heat of a warm, sunny day. Thinking as he would only smell sweat and dirt and grass if he did the same, you blushed and made a note to change before you came back over.

Whatever Vision thought about how you smelled or the clothes you wore, he didn’t seem to care enough, if at all. He took advantage of being out of sight to move his hands from your hours to your waist—a much more convincing position indeed—and nuzzled his nose to your hairline, now exposed as your hat rested farther back on your head.

“You know very well that you can use ours,” he said.

You felt his warm breath on your forehead. If you weren’t standing up and didn’t have the nagging feeling that you were getting dirt on his nice sweater, you would have been perfectly comfortable simply hugging him and dozing off in the cozy embrace right there.

Vision continued in a lilting voice and with an added shimmy that brought the two of you directly to the front door. “They’d love to see you, you know.”

They? Your brows furrowed a bit, then rolled your eyes. Oh, Wanda plus baby.

Still, you steeled your resolve and leaned away from him. He looked at you like he was a puppy that had been kicked, to which you responded with a faux scowl. “Mr. Vision Maximoff, I said I was going bring my tools, and [Y/N] is no flake. Besides,” you paused as your scowl melted into a smile, “I don’t want to get dirt and grime all over the new room. It’ll only take a minute; you act like we can’t see each other through our living room windows if we wanted to.”

Making his last attempt, Vision leaned into your arms, which were now around his own, and pressed his cheek against your temple. Still pouting, he muttered, “It only took Wanda and I going around a few times before we moved in together.”

The idea of you living under the same roof as your couple and their new baby made you giddy as much as it made you feel like you wanted to throw yourself into a lit fire pit to save yourself from embarrassment.

“Ah, yes, a spectacle to behold,” you said as you leaned away again, “A new baby and a new roommate!” You saw Vision open his mouth to speak, no doubt to respond with a quip, and quickly continued, disentangling yourself from him as you did, “Gotta skitty, I’ll be back momentarily!”

“Well,” Vision replied, dragging out the last consonant as if you were going to change your mind if he did so long enough; when you didn’t, he huffed a bit. “Alright then. Hurry back!”

You gave him a smile and two-fingered salute then bounded down the steps and back across the street. You only stopped once on the quick trip back home and that was to give Bernard another swift kick, which somehow lodged the bird the rest of the way into the ground, and a “Fuck you, Bernard!” You heard sputtering laughter from across the street that made you grin as you marched inside to change and grab your toolkit.

The tools were the easy part; they had been sitting out on the table in your dining area since last night when you’d originally suggested the idea so you were sure to not forget them. It took a bit longer to struggle your way out of your clothes, especially while simultaneously trotting to the bathroom to wash your hands and splash water on your face. It took longer still to jog back to your bedroom without slamming yourself into an end table or plant along the way and then also go through every piece of clothes you owned; when bright colors and eccentric outfits came into style, you were, for once, ahead of the fashion game with your regular closet, and your wardrobe only continued to grow as the rest of the country’s interest in the style did. You were particularly interested in peacock fashion and it showed in your array of ruffled, brightly colored, and loudly patterned shirts and blouses.

Of these blouses, you threw on one in a burnt orange and yellow paisley pattern, choosing one without ruffles in fear of ripping them while working. You paired the shirt with matching yellow walk-shorts that ended just above your knees and a pair of honey-brown clog sandals whose color made you think of Vision’s outfit. Thinking about this further, you decided to accent your ensemble with a touch of blue, wrapping your hair that was still damp with sweat back with a satin scarf that was a vibrant blue and some handmade jewelry pieces in the same color to match. Finally, you added a woven belt and, after looking in the mirror for a moment, decided to tie your blouse off an inch above the waist of your shorts instead of tucking it in before booking it back across the street.

Standing at the door of your couple’s house, you took a final glance at yourself in the reflection of one of their windows before knocking. You let yourself in after Wanda invited you with a holler through the door and you were greeted with the interesting sight of Wanda, in all her stunning, colorful, mother-to-be glory standing by the long dark-wood dining table; Vision, half-hidden behind her belly that seemed significantly larger than the last time you saw her, was taking an awkward knee while holding up a variety of fruits.

“I’m never not uniquely surprised when I walk into this house,” you said mostly to yourself and you made your way over. Reaching Wanda, you sat your bag of tools on the floor by her feet and gave her a gentle hug. “Hey, sunshine, you’re looking foxy.”

You certainly had gotten a lot more comfortable with them recently.

Wanda visibly blushed, giving you one of her signature fake irritated looks—a tilted head with tight-knit brows and tight lips that broke into a smile less than a second later—and lightly swatted your arm before carefully returning the hug. “Hey sunshine yourself. Look at you, you’re glowing! And those threads, you’re a regular Casanova.”

She made a point of eyeing your partially exposed midriff and you almost blushed—but not quite.

“Glowing,” you repeated, playfully patting your face, “I’m not even the pregnant one! Thank you, though. Some of the colors were inspired.” You took your turn eyeing her, particularly the bright red of her striped dress that was a common color in her palette, then you caught Vision’s bright blue gaze as he stood and placed a couple of fruits back in their rightful place in the basket on the table. You moved to Wanda’s other side to help him. “Why the fruit?”

“Oh, well, the doctor said it helps the mothers keep track of the baby’s progress.” Vision explained. He added another fruit to the basket’s tower, although he was giving the last one in his hand an odd look.

“What he actually said was,” Wanda added, grasping your shoulder and tugging you over two put an arm around your waist and give you mildly strained look, “it helps make things ‘simple’ for us ‘little ladies.’”

You recognized the glint in her eye and nodded understandingly. “Well that’s mildly condescending, must’ve been just groovy.”

“Out of sight,” Wanda agreed in the same tone. She then looked in Vision’s direction with raised brows; you followed her gaze and saw the man toying with the large green fruit in his hand. “Hey, honey? What’cha doin’?”

Vision met both of your equally puzzled gazes with barely contained glee. Voice tight from holding back a giggle, he raised the fruit and pointed at it. “I can’t wait… to be… a proud… papa-ya.”

Wanda looked amused at the future father’s pun and Vision grinned, clearly happy with the reaction. You actually laughed before quickly throwing up a hand to cover the titter.

“Well, that just proves it,” you said after composing yourself even though your company seemed perfectly pleased with your reaction to the joke, “you’re going to be a wonderful one. Look at you, turning into a proper one already.”

Vision went from smiling to flusteredly chewing at his lip quite quickly; he would always get easily flustered but never enough to blush. Instead, he’d twist his head a certain way and rub his neck and shoulder, maybe even avoid eye contact if he was embarrassed enough. He’d always tug his bottom lip between his teeth too, something you couldn’t help finding just a touch more endearing than the other mannerisms; at least it gave you a much more rational reason to stare at his lips for longer than generally accepted.

“You really think so?” he asked.

You scoffed as you moved to pick up your tools again. “Of course, you and Wanda will make absolutely stellar parents. The two of you are more prepared now than I’ve seen some people after they’ve already had the kids. Now,” you paused as you stood up straight and looked at your couple with a cheerful smile, “shall we head to the nursery?”

You were partially convinced that you had been invited solely to help Vision wrangle his wife. You certainly hadn’t been invited to help decorate; even pregnant, Wanda made faster work of your tools than you did. You were huffing while maneuvering a rocking chair in the room and by the time you got it settled in the corner, Wanda had already pieced together the changing stand that was to sit next to it. You turned to grab a tool to open the cans of paint only to turn back around and see all of them opened and Wanda with a brush in hand, painting away. You managed to get the crib up before she could get her hands on it but when you looked around for the yellow mattress and bumper cushions, you looked up to find Wanda already putting on the finishing touches.

Now, you were kneeling on the ground by the crib and painting a delicately rendered stork while Vision was getting to his feet after reading all the reasons Wanda should be resting instead of doing what she was doing, which was pulling a mobile of colorful plastic butterflies out of a box and shifting ever so closer to a stool so she could hang it.

“Darling,” Vision tried, shifting ever so closer to her, “you should probably sit down.”

“You really should,” you offered your help, almost half-heartedly because you already knew the outcome before she said it.

“Don’t be silly,” Wanda assured him, “all I feel is excitement, happiness, and— huhnf! Oh!”

You were on your feet and spun around to give her a wide-eyed stare before her gasp even finished, but instead of pain or worry, Wanda’s face was lit up with wonder as the hand not grasping a plate fluttered around her stomach. Vision also moved quickly, to step forward and pressed his hand on her stomach.

He breathed, “Kicking already?” and they shared an excited stare.

You stared awkwardly from the side with a paintbrush in hand, feeling more out of place you’ve ever had in your life.

Until Wanda, without missing a single beat, turned her head in your direction and grinned. “[Y/N], you have to feel this!” Then she spoke to Vision, “Oh, it’s such a strange sensation, it’s kinda fluttery!”

She was breathtaking. Then her nose scrunched up and she giggled in a way that could also be described as fluttery, and you were wondering in which states polygamy was legal and where was the best jeweler to get a ring.

Still, you were trying to refrain from overstepping boundaries.

“Oh, I don’t know…” you mumbled, shifting your weight from foot to foot and glancing around the room. You noticed the mobile she had been retrieving the last time you’d looked at her was already hung up above the crib; of course, it was.

Wanda scoffed and made a gesture at Vision, then he was walking over and coaxing you to her side with an encouraging nuzzle to your temple.

“I just don’t want—” you started.

“To overstep, we know,” Wanda finished, the giddy look on her face replaced with a scowl. “Trust me, this is probably the one and only time I’ll ask for someone to feel my stomach while everyone else in the town just does it willy-nilly and besides, you are a part of— Oh!”

Her gasp and glance over your shoulder, combined with the sound of movement behind you was enough to make you turn your head, only for Vision to catch your attention in the opposite direction.

“Another kick!” he exclaimed, just a little too loud. You thought you caught his gaze flitting over in the same direction as Wanda’s but then he was grasping your wrist and placing your hand against Wanda’s stomach. At the same time, his arm that was hovering politely around your back pressed against the naked small of your back as he pulled you closer into the little triangle of space you, Wanda, and he made; the sudden heat there made your blood boil in the best way and when his hand accidentally caught on the hem of your shorts and dipped a little lower over the fabric, you choked while sucking in a breath.

Vision’s hands flew up to the sky and he scrambled away, apologizing profusely. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see his hands fluttering around, could imagine his eyes doing the same, and you were vaguely aware of Wanda moving at your other side, the fabric of her sleeve brushing against yours as she waved her arm. You also heard a sound that you chalked up to being a breeze coming from the open window and rustling the drawn curtains. You, usually the final piece of the chaotic puzzle, were instead staring down and softly gasping as the sudden tap against your palm.

“I felt it,” you whispered and the chaos that was happening around you seemed to still in the same moment as Wanda and Vision settled back around you to feel themselves. You repeated the phrase, brushing your thumb across the patch of clothed skin, and the baby responded with another kick a moment later. You couldn’t help looking up at Wanda a face frozen in almost childish wonder, and state the obvious, “You’re gonna have a baby.”

Wanda nodded at you with shining eyes and a wet smile. She wrapped her free arm around her midsection and looked back down on her belly. The expression on her face radiated an intense, loving tenderness and you felt a billion non-plastic butterflies make a comfortable home in your chest.

You followed her gaze and felt your face break into a grin so wide that your cheeks started to hurt almost immediately. Your hand, along with Wanda’s own and Vision’s, created a loose but ever so protective triangular shield over the place where you had felt your first baby kick, promising to move the universe for them should it ever be required. Despite the overlapping mess of fingers, you noticed how Vision’s hand was the perfect size to envelop your own and that even with a ring on one of them, Wanda’s fingers fit perfectly in the spaces between yours.

The nervousness and insecurities that seemed to bounce around your head whenever you observed your couple, in their perfect world with their perfect dynamics, melted away in the comfortable warmth that came from your trio’s cozy huddle. This wasn’t a story about you or them separately but the three of you together and it was a wonderful one in the making.

Then, “Oh.”

Wanda looked up at her husband and echoed, “Oh.”

You looked up second, adding your own questioning “Oh?” before your gaze settled on the butterfly lightly perched on the tip of Vision’s nose. “Oh!” Watching the monarch’s delicate wings fluttering, you were surprised he hadn’t already sneezed.

“Hello, little fella,” Vision softly said. He was the first to separate your group, stepping away and leaning down a bit for your and Wanda’s better viewing. His smile was blinding for the brief moment you caught it, before tilting your head away to snicker at the way his eyes were crossing to view his insect passenger.

Wanda gently coaxed the butterfly onto her fingertip and walked over to the window to release it. That’s when you noticed a group of the bug type coalesced around the same area; the sudden visit from Mother Nature must have been what she had seen earlier.

“Oh, my,” you said, “that’s something you don’t see every day.”

The smile on Wanda’s face tightened for just a moment as her gaze jumped around the baby room, then relaxed as she maneuvered the various colorful butterflies outside. “Bringing good vibes, hopefully. They must have been enticed by the mobile; why, they even tried to free their plastic friends!”

You looked towards the crib curiously and saw that the mobile hanging above it was only a series of transparent hanging strings. Walking over, you found the butterflies that had once been attached to it scattered around the mattress. You picked a couple of them up and carefully pinched the thin material between your fingers. “Hm, strong butterflies.”

“Clearly,” Vision agreed. He walked over to the rocking chair he had been sitting and reading baby books earlier and picked up his most recent read.

Meanwhile, you began gathering up the scattered butterflies, then climbed up the nearby stool to retrieve the rest of the mobile. “You wouldn’t happen to have a good adhesive laying around, would you? I can have this fixed up and rehung lickity-split.”

“Not laying around but I’m sure there’s one in the cabinet under the sink.” Vision seemed to find the page he was looking for. He glanced over the words, tensed up immediately after, and paced over to Wanda’s side as she shut the window. “If that was first kick, that puts you at about six months! Why I can’t keep up!”

Has it been that long already? You silently wondered as you made your way over to the exit, careful not to crush any of the delicate pieces you were holding. While Vision was thinking in terms of babies, you were surprised that you had already been dating him and his wife for almost half of a year.

In a signature dad-to-be fashion, Vision waggled his head down to give Wanda and the baby a kiss. Then he said in an equally identifiable dad’s voice, “Please don’t misinterpret. I can’t wait you meet you, little Billy!”

You leaned against the doorframe as you offered Wanda an amused look; you had been previously graced with the conversation of baby names and Billy wasn’t exactly on her roster.

“Billy?” she questioned, to which Vision gave a smile and an affirming noise. Wanda continued, “Well I was thinking Tommy. Just a nice, classic American name.”

Vision gave an exaggerated, head tilting nod that suggested a mild disagreement. Then the higher-pitched tone he took when he replied confirmed it. “Hm, Tommy! Hm, mm… then there’s Billy, isn’t there? Named after William Shakespeare, all the world’s a stage, all the men and women many players!”

Wanda went to speak but you beat her to it. “You’re sure it’s a boy, then?”

Your partner seemed mildly embarrassed as she turned her attention to you. “Strong intuition?”

You offered casually, not thinking about your lack of say in the matter, “What about Victor? Vin? Little Vinny’s certainly a cute nickname.” Almost immediately after you finished, it was your turn to be the embarrassed one. You stumbled over your words a bit as you started to apologize, only to falter when you saw both Vision and Wanda’s gleeful stares.

“Well, those are wonderful names too,” Wanda assured you, clearly pleased you had chimed in, “but I’m not hoping for quadruplets. I guess we’ll need the next best thing— A girl.”

Your shoulders relaxed from their hunched places that you hadn’t noticed they took. You chuckled and strolled out the door, throwing a couple more ideas over your shoulder, “Vivian! Virginia! Nadia!”

Vision’s voice floated after you as you walked to the kitchen. “Ooh, Vivian’s quite good…”

When you returned to the bedroom with good-as-new mobile in hand, only final touches needed to be added to the nursery, and Wanda and Vision’s excitement over the baby’s coming was suddenly amped up to eleven. The two were pacing around and frantically listing off the all things that they had left to do or buy. It was a very drastic change from the casual playfulness that you had experienced between them earlier, as the new parents were keeping themselves—and you—busy with a thousand new tasks. Eventually, Vision had a list about as long as he was tall of every bottle, diaper, blanky, binky, children’s book, and stuffed animal that they had yet to get.

Deciding you were now the more sane member of the group, you decided to take the list and go shopping for them; if you didn’t, Vision may have been swept up in the baby section of a clothing store and never return. That’s how you ended up where you were now, at the front of an ever-growing line of department store customers, waiting anxiously as the workers tried to get the lights back on and the cash register back in working order.

You rapped your fingernails on the countertop—not intentionally, just out of worry about how your parents-to-be were managing at home—and glanced from your bloated shopping cart to the cashier, who was talking quietly with a manager then back several times. You were antsy about being stuck in a store when you were much useful elsewhere and being concerned about whether you were making the cashier uncomfortable with your mannerisms, for they were probably three times as unsettled as you were, wasn’t doing anything but adding on to the stress.

Finally, the cashier turned back to you and the rest of the shoppers and announced, “Good news, everybody! The register is still down but it’s a quick switch to manual; we’ll have each and every one of you checked out and on your ways home soon!”

A cheer erupted around you but you were too frazzled to join in.

“Unfortunately,” the cashier continued as the noise died down, “we’re not the only store experiencing this. It’s the whole town.”

While the crowd’s disappointed “Aww” only appeared mildly disgruntled, you went rigid and your mind began racing, all thoughts revolving around a particular household.

One random thought of wondering What if Wanda went into labor right now? had the hair on your arms sticking straight up.

You slammed your hand down on the counter, spooking both the cashier and yourself.

“Ma’am,” you started, then paused to quickly apologize for your rudeness before continuing, “I need you to check me out as fast as humanly possible; I think my—” Wife seemed way out of line but girlfriend felt too out of place. “—pah-art-ner’s having a baby.”

You were struggling to your car with a small mountain of baby items in the arms in a matter of minutes, mentally kicking yourself for being bad at talking the entire way there. You threw your bags in the back, scrambled into the driver’s seat, and were getting ready to pull away from the curb when a ringing from your mobile phone sounded.

“Goddammit,” you huffed. One hand was pulling up an antenna and pressing the technological brick to your ear while the other gripped your steering wheel so hard that your knuckles turned three skin tones lighter. “Yeah, hello?”

“[Y/N]?” Agnes’s voice was a welcome surprise but her worried tone wasn’t.

“No, it’s your husband, I’m on my way home now, dear,” you snarked, then mentally kicked yourself again. “Sorry, that was rude, I’m in a rush. What’s crackin’? Besides the town going into blackout, that is.”

“The neighborhood’s flooded,” Agnes said simply.

You blanched. “I’m sorry?”

“The cul-de-sac? Something’s happened and all the pipes have burst. Mine, Herb’s, Dotty’s, everyone’s!”

How on earth the day’s mood has changed so quickly, you had no idea. What you did know is that you desperately had to get back to Wanda’s side, your house be damned.

“Thanks, ‘Nes, good to know,” you hissed through clenched teeth. You rested your phone between your ear and shoulder as you put both hands on the wheel and started driving.

“Do you want me to do anything?” Agnes asked; her voice sounded as frazzled as you and the rest of Westview looked. “Go over to your place, grab anything important?”

You huffed out a sigh as your car flew around a corner. “Agnes, you know I adore you, but I really, really have to go.”

“[Y/N]—”

You hung up and tossed the shoe-sized device in the passenger’s seat.

Vision met you on the curb as you were parking your car and he had the doctor from earlier that day in tow, now dressed in vacationing attire and very seeming very underprepared. Within a few words and as if you had accidentally wished it into existence back at the department store, you were informed that Wanda was in fact about to have little Billy or Tommy or who-have-you. Of course, this messy day would come to a peak in such a way.

The taller man was half-escorting, half-hauling both you and the doctor to the door, and the bags in the backseat of your car were completely forgotten as concern chewed away at your insides. Loud, strained sounds coming from inside only added onto it.

As the three of you reached the front door, Vision flung it open and pressed the doctor inside. Then he grabbed your wrist and began tugging you in after himself.

You couldn’t help your feet freezing to the concrete. “Vis, are you sure?”

The distress on his face softened just slightly and he pressed the back of your hand to his lips. “Of course we are.” Then he wrapped an arm around you and properly, albeit quickly, brought you into his and Wanda’s home—

—where Wanda was laying on the floor, panting and shimmering with sweat and holding a baby wrapped in a blue and white dishtowel while Geraldine perched awkwardly over her.

You and Vision shared a bug-eyed look before Vision’s turned into one of sadness. You wanted so badly to hug him and tell him it was alright but he was already releasing you and slowly walking over; you trailed a couple of steps after him.

“Oh no,” he murmured, “I missed it?” However, when he took a look at Wanda’s softly smiling face and their happily cooing baby, whatever brief grief he was experiencing was replaced by a proud smile and new fatherly glow.

“Hey, doc,” Geraldine spoke suddenly, “why don’t you help me out in the kitchen there?” She nodded in your direction as well.

You wondered why she was there, in Wanda’s home or Westview, at all. The idea made your stomach flip but you just couldn’t place why.

The only response the doctor gave was blubbering about speeding as she took his arm and led him away. You began to follow when Vision stopped you with a gentle tug on your arm.

“No, [Y/N],” he said, “it’s alright. Stay and come see.”

You didn’t even think as you smiled and took his hand. You took a glance towards the kitchen to make sure the other company was occupied, then kissed the back of his hand as he had done only a moment earlier. Squeezing it and letting it drop, you responded, “Go say hello to your baby. I’ll always be here.”

Given the current situation, Vision wasn’t up for arguing much. He gave you a quick peck on the temple before gingerly making his way over to where Wanda rested happily on the living room floor.

You made your way to the kitchen, where you slumped against the kitchen counter as exhaustion overtook you. You were close enough to both parties to hear Geraldine’s blatant attempts at distracting the doctor to your left and Vision and Wanda’s cozy rumblings to your right, but too out of sorts to make out anything tangible. You didn’t realize until now how badly your feet ached from the combination of gardening, decorating, and running around and how your outfit had lost its cute playfulness in place of wrinkles and feeling slightly damp from sweat. You were sure you were looking more worse for wear than Wanda, despite Wanda having had a baby, but when you thought about it for more than a second or two, you felt like you wouldn’t trade the day for any other in the world.

Especially when thinking about that cutie patootie, you thought with a tired smile. He’s gonna have such good parents. Such a good life.

Suddenly, your train of thought was stopped by the sound of Wanda yelling and your whole body jerked in her direction, energetic as ever.

Wanda was going into labor a second time, you could see easily see. Something somehow more surprising was going on in the living area, though, and that something was Vision’s skin. While he still wore his regular clothes, that was the only normal thing about him. Instead of light skin, his flesh was a deep red and you weren’t even sure it could be called skin; it looked more… mechanical than that, with symmetrical lines etched into some places and silver plating covering others. Instead of a full head of wavy hair, he had none, and his ears and parts of his bald skull were also covered in silver. Silver came to a peak at the top of his forehead and at the end of it was a golden gem.

Vision was holding his baby and yelling along with Wanda as she began pushing a second time. He happened to glance up and catch your bewildered eye and then he started yelling because of you.

You stood frozen in place, not sure what to do until you heard a commotion behind you.

“Well, what’s going on now?” Geraldine started.

Your brain kicked back into full gear and thinking quickly and somewhat stupidly, you yelled and pointed in the opposite direction, “Jeepers creepers, is that a stork?” You couldn’t imagine why your poor attempt at a distraction worked but you considered it a success as Geraldine and the still-disoriented doctor’s attention settled elsewhere. Not missing a beat, you grabbed another cloth from the kitchen and raced to Wanda and Vision’s aid, skidding to a halt on your knees.

“[Y/N],” Vision said, though nothing else followed. He stared at you in pure shock, mouth flapping and the bright blue irises of his eyes twisting and shifting like a camera lens as he looked at you. Still, his body worked despite his befuddled mind as he took the cloth you handed him and offered you a newborn baby to hold instead.

“[Y/N],” Wanda gasped through her current endeavor. When you dragged your head to look at her, she was staring at you with a clenched jaw and equally wide eyes, which were filled with a mixture of surprise, horror, and… relief? Then she was screaming and pushing again, eyes squeezed shut, and her hand flew to your own.

You grabbed it and held on tight, even when her fingernails dug in enough to leave marks for days. While a red and silver-skinned Vision handled the delivery like a champ—a bugged out, stammering, robotic champ who couldn’t figure out whether he should be looking at you, his wife, or the baby he was helping into the world but a champ nonetheless—you switched between offering encouraging words to the tiring new mother and cooing calmly at the newborn swaddled and resting cozily in the crook of your arm. Soon enough, Wanda was slumping back into the pillow behind her head and Vision was sitting back on his haunches with another quiet baby snuggled against his chest; your taut muscles sagged and the exhaustion you hit in the kitchen came rushing back.

You made sure Wanda was lucid enough to take her baby back and carefully transferred from your arms to hers. It was only after he was safely in his mother’s grasp that you were able to fully relax, tossing an arm around Vision’s shoulders and leaning heavily against him while you shook out your other hand, which was red and covered in deep, crescent moon-shaped marks.

“So,” you puffed, “Billy and Tommy?”

Wanda’s tired face lit up as she nodded her head towards her baby. “Tommy.”

Vision, who was leaning on you as much as you were on him—something in the back of your head noted that the two of you held each other very well and that something sent a little pang of affection straight to your pounding heart—used his turn to nuzzle the forehead of the baby he held and grumble in a half British, half baby-talk accent, “Billy.”

You hummed while stretching a hand down to give Billy a very ginger boop on the nose; he didn’t seem to mind. Then you said, “Vinny and Vivian will just have to be next time.”

Your group shuddered with a mess of tired, soft laughter. Then you began to relax further but as the excitement of childbirth began to wear off, you a new variation of tension settling into your couple. The new parents were sharing increasingly worried looks and if they were communicating telepathically, and it was then that you remembered that the man sitting next to you was for less human than you’d previously made him out to be.

The realization seemed to hit him at almost the same time because his head swung to look at you just as you had turned to observe his new appearance. On his robotic face—was robotic even the word; was he a robot?—was an expression of outright fear but also something that looked like he was mentally being torn in two different directions. He went to speak several times—his mouth and teeth looked the same, perfect and familiar—only to verbally scramble and backtrack, shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders since his hands were too occupied to scratch his neck. Finally, he appeared to get himself in order and he started, “[Y/N], I can— we can explain—”

You ran your hand over his scalp and down to rest at the base of his neck; the silver plating felt like metal, while the thick red epidermis was warm and softer to the touch. Not only warm but damp from exertion, and pulsing softly to some form of a heartbeat where you ran a finger over a common pulse point.

While your mental energy was rapidly declining, you still managed to quip at the man, “As much as loved the idea of running my fingers through your hair, I think I prefer this over that awful cut that’s in style right now.”

That left Vision dumbfounded and silent, his mouth flopping open and closed like a fish out of water. On your other side, who had been otherwise quiet and already snoozing as far as you were concerned, broke into a burst of loud laughter that was music to your ears.

You grinned in response but your muscles were too tired to make it reach your eyes. You shifted over slightly to be closer to Wanda now and brushed your thumb over little Tommy’s cheek before resting doing a similar action to his mother’s. Wanda relaxed her head against your palm and the way she looked up at you from under her lashes made you do mental gymnastics about the ethics of blurting out the L-word then and there.

Unfortunately, the moment didn’t last much longer because then Geraldine’s voice floated over from the kitchen, getting louder as she and the doctor made their way back from the wild stork chase you sent them on. You quickly looked to Vision, only to see him looking as human as the day you first met him, and noted the sad little string you got from seeing simple blue irises instead of the intricately shifting blue ones that swirled mechanically as he focused on something. It only lasted a moment, though, before you and your trio were busy readjusting yourselves into what you considered normal poses but in reality, probably made the three of you look much more awkward than you previously had.

You’d just finished settling as Geraldine and her companion walked into the living room and, thinking tiredly and definitely stupidly, you blurted, “Jeepers creepers, another baby!”

“Twenty fingers and twenty toes, you’ve got two healthy baby boys on your hands.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Wanda responded as the man handed Billy back to her. Vision stood watchfully next to her, holding Tommy.

You poked your head up from behind the second crib you were finishing assembling and as the doctor turned to thank Geraldine for her delivery help, you said to the Maximoff couple, “And a second crib all ready to go. If they’re not fans of sleeping separately, let me know and we can exchange the ones you have for one big one.”

Wanda held out her hand to you as you stood and you walked over to hold it only briefly as she thanked you before leaning over and crooning at Billy and Tommy in turn. You were in the company of others, after all, and there had been enough excitement for one day without revealing your polyamorous relationship to a neighbor and a random doctor.

It was weird how different the energy felt standing with them now than it had earlier just that day alone. Things still felt new and strange but you no longer felt like a separate unit from the household you were standing in or the people standing and smiling oh so sweetly at you. Then again, maybe that’s just what being involved in the arrival of an unexpected set of twins and making a superhuman discovery about one of your partners did to all blossoming romantic triads in the seventies.

Speaking of the doctor, as he began to finish up chatting with Geraldine, Vision beckoned you closer, and after getting an okay to do so, he carefully laid the baby he held in your arms. He gave Tommy a nuzzle and a light tap on the nose, then straightened up and headed towards the door.

He said to the other man, “Allow me to walk you out, doctor.”

“Oh, alright,” the doctor responded with an odd quiver in his voice. Said quiver was confirmed to be restlessness, which you had no doubt was attached to some sort of superhuman business Vision had involved him in when picking him up, when he continued, “As long as we actually walk this time?”

You would definitely have to delve into the mystery of Vision’s sometimes inhuman appearance at a later date but at that moment you were remembering how the entire neighborhood’s pipes had burst. The neighborhood of which your house was a part of and an event you were sure you hadn’t been lucky enough to avoid.

“Oh, shi—oot,” you stammered, “I should probably get back to my own pad and save what I can from getting water damage. I haven’t even been home to see how bad everything is.” You provided Tommy with a very important explanation in very serious baby babble terms before placing him in his crib. “I’ll just leave my car on this side of the street and bring the other stuff in sometime later this evening if that’s alright with you, Wanda?”

When you looked at her, she was giving you a confused head tilt. She blinked, then her eyes shot wide open. “Oh, the pipes!” She paused and turned her gaze to the far wall of the living room as if she could see your house through it, then looked back at you with a smile. “Your house should be fine. In fact, I think the entire neighborhood is back intact!”

Something about the way she looked at you assured you that she was right. You wondered whether Vision wasn’t the only one with a unique secret under this roof and if all the strange happenings that had gone on today couldn’t be traced back to Wanda herself.

Not that any of that really mattered in the grand scheme of things.

“I should still go,” you insisted, “You should really rest for a while, and I am a mess for the second time today. Maybe I can pop back over in a little bit?”

Wanda pursed her lips in a subtle doubt before giving in. She nodded and after taking a glance around to make sure the company was occupied, she grasped your hand and leaned in closer. “Come over for dinner tonight. Stay and help us get the babies settled in? We can talk about today.”

“Wanda, you need rest—”

The woman interrupted, a teasing look making her eyes glitter. “Which is why either you or Vision will be doing the cooking! And you know how much I love the man but there’s a reason the only thing he handles in the kitchen is water from the faucet.”

You had to nod in somber agreement at that statement, then sighed and gave Wanda a pout of your own. “Fine. Now, is anyone looking?”

Wanda was smiling triumphantly. She took another quick look around, then shook her head; her silky hair fanned out slightly from its position perfectly framing her head as she did.

You shuffled a little closer and slipped an arm around her waist in an intimate hug. Leaning in, you gave her one quick smooch on the cheek and another on the forehead then mumbled against her skin, “You did amazing.” Another kiss. “And you’re going to be a wonderful mother. Please, though, promise me that you’ll rest, at least for a little bit. The world will not crumble around you if you take one break.”

Wanda, who had immediately leaned into your embrace and giggled as you kissed her, scoffed slightly. She gave you a tight squeeze and murmured back, “I suppose you’re right. Fine, but only because you promised to cook.”

“Well, technically,” you said as you broke away from her, “I only said I’d come over. I can’t wait for Vision to make us burnt water and boiled bacon!”

Wanda stared after you, frozen in a mock gasp. “[Y/N]!”

You grinned and waved before spinning on your heels and trotting over to where Vision was perched, holding the door. “Bye!”

When you got to the door, Vision’s hand played lightly down your back as he followed you outside after the doctor.

“Well, Dr. Nielson,” Vision said, “I hope you’re still able to make your trip.”

The doctor, apparently Dr. Nielson, slowed as he stepped off the porch and onto the sidewalk. He turned towards Vision with a glassy look in his eye that he hadn’t had before but you’ve been seeing more and more often in Westview residents these days. When he talked, his speech became slower as well.

“Ah, yes, about my trip,” he drawled, “I don’t think we’ll get away after all. Small towns, you know. So hard to… escape.”

You frowned, suddenly uneasy. Glancing at Vision, the man just looked confused.

Dr. Nielson’s glassy gaze shifted from Vision to you. He spoke deliberately to you, “Don’t you think, [Y/N]?” Then he blinked, turned, and walked off down the sidewalk.

You weren’t sure exactly why, but you flinched and reeled back. You would have tripped and fallen up the porch if it weren’t for Vision catching you. Then the two of you stood gripping each other and staring as the doctor disappeared around the corner.

You didn’t even realize that your ears had started ringing until the sound began to fade. You started, “Well, that was…”

“Yeah,” Vision said with a slow nod. “Very. Are you alright?”

“Fine, I think.”

“No migraines?”

“No migraines.”

The two of you stood holding each other for a moment longer before you forced your fingers to loosen their death grip on Vision’s jacket. As the two of you relaxed slightly and readjusted yourselves, several questions rushed through your head, like why was that so unnerving and why did the doctor speak directly to you.

How had he known your name?

A particularly sharp pain made your vision swim temporarily but it was gone as soon as it came. Before you think any further on the subject, other voices floated into your range of hearing.

“What is she doing in there?”

“I don’t know.”

You followed the voices with your eyes and found Agnes and Herb talking quietly by the wall Herb had been cutting into earlier; actually, Herb looked like he’d barely moved an inch, still standing in the gap between his wall of shrubs. At least he appeared more lucid, but now he and Agnes were huddled together like they were having a secret meeting. Neither of them noticed you yet.

Vision decided to change that by throwing up a hand and hollering, “Howdy neighbors!”

Agnes spun around so quickly you were wonder if she’d given herself whiplash, but the strained greetings and even more strained expressions that both she and Herb gave were what really piqued your interest.

Well, not so much piqued your interest than their actions gave you a second dose of uneasiness that made your head spin and filled you with a sense of somewhat morbid curiosity.

Then they stuck their heads back together and continued muttering.

“Did you see her go inside?” Agnes questioned.

Herb responded, “She went right in.”

Vision leaned his head closer to yours; he didn’t seem to catch what they were saying. “Do they seem… a little off to you?”

“Just a tad.”

You silently deliberated with each other before casually strolling over.

“Remarkable day we’re having, no?” Vision tried again.

Agnes and Herb looked up again, also trying to look casual but there was something definitely worrisome about their equally strained smiles.

Vision continued, “Did you lose power too?”

You snapped your fingers, joining in. “That’s right! Agnes, you called me about the pipes bursting. I hope nothing got too damaged?”

“Oh, sure did,” Agnes said to Vision, “but Ralph looks better in the dark, so I’m not complaining. And you’re right, I did, [Y/N]! Luckily, everything’s just fine.”

There was an awkward pause and even though you were out in open air, you felt like you were struggling to breathe in a sauna.

Vision said, “Hi, Herb.”

Herb responded, “Heya, buddy.”

More awkward silence.

“Well,” Vision said slowly, lightly clapping his hands together, “I’ll get back to Wanda. [Y/N], you’re heading home?”

“Right,” you affirmed, a little too quickly.

What is going on?

Vision placing his hand on your back brought back some sense of normalcy as he began escorting you to the curb.

“Vision,” Agnes abruptly said halting your exit. You and your partner turned back to her and Herb and she continued after a long-winded pause and adjusting her awkward stance leaning against the low wall, “Is Geraldine inside with Wanda?”

“Yes. Why?”

Herb piped up, “She’s new to town. Brand new.”

Wait, that’s not right. Your brows furrowed and you felt the sting of your own bite as you chewed your bottom lip. You felt pressure in your skull as you tried to recall where you’d previously met the woman, because you knew you had, but trying to do so had a similar feeling to trying to grip water as it rushed through your fingers.

Agnes went on, “There’s no family. No husband.”

You would have scowled, said something in defense of your circumstances of moving to Westview without a family or marriage, but you were too busy trying to clear away the fog that quickly encroaching your headspace. Vision, on the other hand, was able to say something, “Well there’s nothing wrong with that.”

Agnes hummed, gave a half-hearted nod, then steadily met his gaze. “No home.”

Come to think of it, you knew very little about Geraldine. While you were positive that you’d met her before today, you couldn’t for the life of you place what she did for work, when she first appeared in Westview, what house in the cul-de-sac she lived in—

You could list off the names of everyone who lived in your neighborhood. Geraldine wasn’t one of them.

Your brain felt like it could expand and explode from the intense pressure at any moment but the dread pooling in the pit of your stomach from the idea of not being able to retrieve memories bothered you far more. You couldn’t bring yourself to push the thoughts away and instead mentally leaned into the pain. The harder you pushed, the more pressure pushed back, as if you were fighting against an invisible barrier that was barring you from your own memories.

At the same time, you attempted to keep yourself grounded by staying tuned into the conversation at hand. Vision asked Agnes what she meant by Geraldine having no home and Herb kept stumbling over the same beginning of a sentence—She came here because… She came here because… She came here because we’re all…—like he was a record on a broken player that just wouldn’t let him get out what he wanted to say.

Vision tried to urge him on. “She came here because what? What are trying to tell me?”

With Agnes and Herb bickering briefly about whether or not to tell Vision whatever it was they had been speaking about, Vision completely tuned into them, and you fighting to remember things without succumbing to your migraines, you had an underlying feeling of being out of place. You’ve felt out of place before, of course, but this was something different and weird and wrong. Your entire perfect—but not so much, you were gradually learning—little town suddenly seemed like it was out of place in its state, its country, its world, its reality. Out of nowhere, Westview felt like it was trapped in a claustrophobic little bubble that wouldn’t let anyone escape and the longer anyone was here, the warped things would become—

A memory came rushing back of a black and white talent show and a smashed mirror and an arm oozing blood and color and Geraldine was there but she was an eerie Geraldine, out of place and time and reality and asking if you knew who she was or who you were and you didn’t know the answer and then Wanda and Vision appeared and everything was okay again, and now the name Monica throbbed against the base of your neck and the air around you radiated electricity and it was itchy and no one around you was noticing anything and instead of darkness, a weird bright light was tinging the edges of your vision white and—

There was a crash coming from the house and none of the people standing next to you were any the wiser but even though you felt like you were swimming through honey while doing it, you turned just in time to see a portion of a nearby wall explode as something shot out from inside and continued flying until it disappeared into the distance. Then there was a sound similar to a sonic boom that followed and a wave of nausea crashed over you as the electric air rippled and distorted right before your eyes, and then you could see the dome of TV static-looking energy that encapsulated your town and the dome seemed to peak directly above the Maximoff house.

Your ears rang. Your mouth flapped open closed but you couldn’t force a single word out. You looked around and everyone else in your group seemed trapped in a strained conversation that they couldn’t escape from if they wanted to.

You didn’t so much walk as you floated over to the gaping hole in the side of your couple’s house, or at least, that’s what it felt like as the ground grew soft and wobbly under your feet and you swayed as you moved. You reached the hole and peered through it, then waved aimlessly when you saw Wanda staring wide-eyed at you from a couple of demolished rooms away. She said or mouthed something—she’s sorry? Why?—but you couldn’t tell which it was over the thrumming of your own pulse in your ears. You cocked your head, more out of curiosity than confusion, then blinked and stared glassy-eyed as the hole in the house reversed itself.

“Huh,” you said dumbly as the last brick fell back into place. “Cool.”

Then your body felt as if it were slammed back onto very hard, solid ground and that’s because it was. You weren’t sure if you whined or groaned or screamed as you collapsed to the ground, succumbing to your worst migraine yet.

192 notes · View notes

internalsealpanic · 3 years

Text

The Thorn pt.1

summary: “Please what, Kitten? I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me.”

or my 6 thousand word essay on why I want more Sugar daddy!Slade fics.

a/n: This is just straight up smut Never combine stress thirst plus an amazing enabler. Thanks to @littleredwing89 for basically co-writing. Also I need more case fics with undercover gentlemen’s clubs stuff. I will edit this for grammar later.

warnings: mentions of murder and sexual assault (for the case), mirror sex, collars, oral (male receiving), choking, kind of public sex?, size kink (this is to be expected at this point), strength kink, reader is kind of a dumbass, and praise kink.

villain’s masterlist or masterlist

Saying this wasn’t your scene would be like saying the sun is bright. Obvious but wholly inadequate in describing just how out of your depth you are. You cross your arms over your chest in a futile attempt to shield them from prying eyes. The soft fabric of your lingerie feeling too little in contrast to the men clad in expensive suits leering at you as they passed your skittish form.

You try to swallow down the nervousness. You try to tell yourself this is fine, that it’s just for the case. But the silk collar tied tightly around your neck and your own fraying nerves made it extremely difficult to ignore just how vulnerable you felt.

God, what made your awkward ass think you could pull this off?

You lift your head, eyeing the other men and women around you. You all wore matching silk ribbons tied into bows behind your neck, a circular, silver tag hanging off of it. You wrinkle your nose at how young some of them look. Some barely look old enough to be anywhere near a place like this.

Part of you feels thankful that you shut Nicky’s idea down to go with a leather lingerie set but the stark contrast of your lacy lingerie set made you stand out too much in the sea of leather. It made you stand out just enough to color both your cheeks and ears from the amount of attention you were getting. You close your eyes trying to ignore the heat permeating from your skin. You try to focus on the details of the case.

For the last 8 months, there’s been an increase in the number of young men and women going missing and turning up dead. The assumption had been that it was due to the increase in gang activity but something felt off about the deaths.

Nothing was consistent. The victim type, the area, and even the M.O. of sexual assault were varied. Only the mode of death was even close to being consistent but even that presented its own problems. The injuries were too clean, too efficient for the killer to have drawn any pleasure from it especially when contrasted with the victims’ other injuries. Normally people who make those injuries have a certain type and a certain way of doing things. And the clean efficiency of the disposal method had easily ruled out any of the local gangs.

When you brought all of this up to your boss, he waved you off saying something about looking into it. Somehow not getting fired after screaming at your boss (probably because you’re one of the few crime scene techs willing to stay in this shithole), you decide to conduct your own investigation. The more clues you uncovered (out of sheer spite) the more they seemed to point to an organized crime group, likely involved in trafficking.

Finally, after a month and a half of searching, you found a solid lead. Augustus Klineberg. Despite the name, he was new money. At least, here in Merit.

“I’m his type!”

“And so are a dozen bodies laying around in the lab, what’s your point?”

“Sita, got me a part-time job at the Thorn.”

It hadn’t been easy. The thorn was an exclusive gentlemen’s club that specialized in certain kinks. It had taken Sita a week to even get you an interview but after that they eagerly accepted you with worrying enthusiasm. Either way, this conversation was simply a formality.

Bernard stares at you and you watch as his entire being crumples into the dining room table. He turns to his husband pleadingly. “Nicky, Please, my love, talk some sense into her.”

You turn to Nicky who is innocently sipping from his coffee mug filled with whatever ungodly creation came to Bernard in the dead of night. He tilts his head back seemingly collecting the right words. “Y/n has a point.”

“No! Not you too!”

“Yes!”

“Bern, think about it. Klineberg would never suspect her and unlike most of Klineberg’s victims, Y/n is a ninja gremlin.”

Bernard gives him a withering look while you snort. Nicky shrugs and continues to drink his, what you assumed was, liquid crack.

“Y/n, are you sure about this? The Thorn- Well, it isn’t exactly like your other undercover jobs.” You give both of them a cocky smile, biting into your mini waffle. “It can’t be that hard. All I have to do is sit there and look pretty.” At that little remark, Nicky burst out into a fit of laughter loud enough to wake the neighbors.

You run your hand through your hair still, feeling flustered. You need air.

“Hey Nina, I’m gonna need like maybe 5 minutes.”

“Sure, just don’t blame me for whatever excuse I give the bossman,” Nina says, shrugging at you. She flips her red curls over her shoulder, winking at a patron and tilting her hips to show off her curves. Both you and the patron are slack-jawed and entranced. Maybe you should try that sometime? Some time being after you stop gawking at Nina’s ass and probably also after you take in some air.

You shuffle away awkwardly keeping your eyes to the ground. You shrink into yourself easily as you cut through the crowd. This case was going to be the death of you and Bernard’s eulogy would just be a very short but satisfying ‘I told you so’.

Mercifully, you find a quieter area. You would have preferred to go outside but standing alone in a dark alley in skimpy underwear might be a bad idea. You flatten yourself against a wall and close your eyes. Maybe you could tell them you aren’t feeling well which isn’t entirely untrue. You felt sick being this vulnerable. You should probably leave before you do something stupid.

A hand on your wrist drags you back to reality. It takes absolutely everything in you not to break his wrist. You open your eyes to see Klineberg hoovering in your personal space.

“Are you ok?” He asks, the concern in his voice sounding synthetic. You try to wriggle out of his hold not bothering to hide your discomfort. You note how his smile seems to get bigger as you struggled more. Clearly, he was enjoying your discomfort.

“Thanks for finding her for me. The manager said she’d be in this general area but it’s quite hard to see with just one eye.” Slade says casually, settling a large hand on the man’s shoulder. Your heart stops. Of all the people you had to run into-

Klineberg eyes him skeptically. You have to respect him for that. You’ve faced Slade several times before, only making it out due to luck or hours of planning. If you were Klineberg, you’d be pissing yourself. Despite the almost friendly expression Slade had on him, you can tell this wasn’t up for negotiation. And apparently, so can Klineberg seeing how he dropped your hand.

Slade waves a neatly dressed man over. The man eyes you appraisingly and your heart takes an express elevator to your throat. Were you that obviously out of place?

“We’ll be taking a room.”

“Of course, sir,” The man answers politely, finally, taking his eyes off of you and handing Slade a key.

Wait. We?

Slade starts walking without a word, the crowd parting for him easily. You briefly look back at Klineberg who is still looking at you like he’s going to tear you apart with his bare hands before following Slade.

You walk behind him wordlessly. Your mind is still reeling from the fact that Slade ‘Deathstroke: The Terminator’ Wilson just saved you from your target and your own terrible acting and is mortified by the fact that he has now seen you in skimpy lingerie. The steps you take are measured, making sure to stick close to him but not too close. You keep your eyes to the ground as you walk behind him, hoping it’s enough to hide the expressions cycling through your face.

You two enter a room. It was unexpectedly spacious even under the dim neon lights. You look around finding the room furnished with expensive decorations looking nothing like the seedy gentlemen’s clubs you’ve busted before save for the pole in the middle of the room. It looked more akin to an expensive hotel bar, again, save for the pole. The darkness of the room and the quiet flow of the music set quite the intimate atmosphere which just made you that more skittish.

Slade makes his way across the room, eyes searching the corners and spaces of the room. He nods seemingly satisfied with the setup and likely not spotting any recording devices. Your stiff shoulders loosen a bit, if nothing else you could at least speak plainly now.

Slade takes his suit jacket off, revealing broad shoulders and the outline of strong back muscles. Your throat dries. Something warm stirs in you and you’re gawking again. God, you really need a better reaction to attractive people.

Slade holds out a glass of whiskey to you, a playful smile on his handsome face. He doesn’t seem to mind you staring at him. You swear viciously not skimping on colorful words but walk over to take the alcohol regardless. It’s on his tab and you honestly needed some alcohol in your system if you’re going to talk to him.

“So, working for the cops not work out for you?”

“Nah, my last sugar daddy just kicked the bucket, so I’m looking for a new one,” you say, giving Slade a wry smile. You watch him cross one leg over another easing into a relaxed position through the wall. It was polished to a mirror shine. You guess that’s the kind of thing rich people liked.

“Hmmm, that can be arranged.” You choke on your drink. You scowl at him. He simply shrugs at you taking a sip of his whiskey.

You hear the door open, forcing you to pretend to be civil. A man around your age, dressed in a classic waiter’s outfit comes in with a tray of whiskey and two glasses. You don’t know how but you can tell the whiskey is worth more than your apartment. This doesn’t help your urge to punch Slade.

“Will you be requiring any special toys tonight, sir?” The straightforward tone of the question makes you stiffen more than anything. The man’s eyes flicker towards you but his focus remains squarely on Slade who eyes you openly before smiling and saying “No, thanks, Anthony. I think we’ll be just fine.”

"If you say so, sir. Please feel free to let us know if you need anything."

You wait for Anthony to leave before turning the full force of your scowl at Slade.“How the hell did you know his name?”

Slade regards you impassively over the rim of his glass. You refuse to break eye contact. He raises his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, Kitten, you caught me. I do frequent this club quite a bit.”

“You kinky shit.”

He eyes you again, his eye clearly tracing your curves. “I’m not the one sitting here in their underwear with a collar on. Speaking of which-” Slade nods his head towards something in front of both of you.

You look at the pole, blinking dumbly as a smile spreads across his face. He tips his head to it. “I did pay for your time and the customer is always right.”

Your mouth twists into a snarl as the tips of your ears run red. “You are insufferable.”

“Don’t make me call the manager.” You sigh at the unspoken ‘it is definitely going to blow your cover and get you shot. At best.’ and begrudgingly you make your way to the pole.

You grip the pole in front of you, flexing your fingers against the cold metal. Anxiety thrums under your skin. Your eyes flick nervously to Slade who’s got the audacity to sit comfortably, sip whiskey, and smirk at you as if he was completely in his element.

“No need to be shy. Be a good girl and give us a good show,” he says, winking at you. Your hackles rise and your face pulls into a frown before rearranging itself into a sultry smile. You put one heel in front of you, hooking your leg around the pole and grinding your clothed sex into the metal in an undulating motion that has Slade clenching his hand around his glass. You try your hardest to grin and you suspect you’ve failed. Not that Slade’s noticed considering his eye is laser-focused on your ass.

With your one leg on the floor, you push yourself into a spin. Your body tips back as your hand runs down your face, chest, and abdomen drawing attention to the plains of exposed skin and delicate fabric accenting your shape. Pulling your body back up, you let your body slide down to the floor. Your legs split as soon as you made contact with the floor giving him a full view of your ass. He whistles appreciatively, tilting his head. You watch him through thick lashes, eyes bright and predatory under the neon lights. You roll onto your hand and knees. He smiles down at you watching the sweat drip down the valley of your breasts. You were a sight to behold.

Slade pats his knee. “Come here, kitten.” Hunger flashes in his blue eye. It sends a warm shock through your system. It’s odd being looked at like that but you can’t feel yourself getting too concerned over it. Not when it sends a pleasant hum through your mind.

You crawl towards him in time with the movement, slow and steady in its place. Stopping in front of him. A large hand grasps your chin, thumb brushing against your bottom lip.

You sit on his lap, hand grasping his broad shoulder. Embarrassment floods back into your system now that you’re this close, now that you had the full force of that hungry gaze on you. You feel your skin heat and the weight of his gaze makes your stomach flip.

Seduction was other people’s gig, not yours.

Large hands settle on your waist, pressing circles into your skin. The buzzing feeling in your brain returns and you refocus on your task. His hands slide down the side of your body, fingers digging into your hips. His hands follow the circular motions your hips make on his crotch and guides you over the growing bulge. You hear his breath catch and hiss as you grind down on his crotch. You wrap your hands around the silk tie dangling from his neck and roughly pull him into a kiss.

His fingers dig into the meat of your ass drawing an embarrassingly loud yelp from you and giving him access to your mouth. You suck on his tongue and receive a pleased groan from him. Your tongues wrestle for control as he kneads your ass, making you mewl and moan into the kiss. You break the kiss needing air while Slade admires his work.

When Slade dips in for another kiss, you pull away pushing off of his broad chest a flirty smile dancing across your features. You turn from him, heels clicking against the floor as your show off the lushness of your figure. In the mirror, you see Slade settling back into his position and grinning at the corners of the room again. His arms relax on the back of the couch.

You close your eyes and let the music swallow you whole. You don’t dare hazard a glance at the mirror. You sashay your hips to the music, loosening your tense muscles. You open your eyes giving Slade your best seductive smile. You run your hands up your body, tangling into your hair.

You bite your lip as you slide them back down. Your fingers catch against the collar. Slade’s mouth twists.

You ease your arms out of your bra and let it drop to the floor. Your nipples pebble in the cold night air. The sight of them makes the corners of Slade’s mouth twitch. You push past the warmth stirring in your stomach in favor of trailing your hands down your body. Your fingers toy with the straps of your panties, watching as Slade licks his lips in anticipation. You slide the flimsy garment down your legs, bending over and giving him a good view of your wet pussy through the mirror.

Stepping out of them, you toss them at Slade, who just to be an asshole, catches and pockets them. He grins at you and shrugs unapologetically. You scowl at him putting as much venom into your features as much as possible.

You sway your lush hips in time with the music, letting the slow beat dictate the rhythm of your movements as you saunter towards him. You swallow, the silk collar still wound tightly around your neck. The intensity of his gaze makes you painfully aware of your nakedness but the embarrassment heating your skin shoots straight to your core, making you shudder.

Reaching him, you straddle his thighs, your plump ass grazing over his growing bulge. You moan, mouth-watering at the sensation. Your mind dwells on the feeling, your insides growing slick at the thought of him inside you.

Your fingers trail up your thighs and up over your stomach. You watch as his eye follows the slow tantalizing movement. His large hands grip onto the plush headrest of the couch, squeezing them as his face twists just a smidge with a mix of exertion and frustration.

You give him a playful smile as you slow the gyrating of your hips. A growl rumbles from his chest and you snap your hips back against his erection, the loose movement of your body hypnotic like ocean waves. Tipping your head back into his shoulder, exposing the column of your throat to him. Your hips continue to undulate against him, feeling the deep bass of the music ripple through your body along with the shockwaves of heat coming from your core as you grind it against his bulge. The coarse feeling of the fabric against your core making your knees grow weak.

A sinful moan tumbles out of your lips followed closely by breathy panting. You let your eyes slide shut soaking up the sensation of his suit against your skin. You reach behind you hooking your arms around Slade’s broad shoulders to steady yourself as your press closer to his large form. He presses his lips to your neck, the prickle of his beard against your skin making you shiver. “Yeah, just like that, kitten,” he murmurs against your skin, a large hand settling on your thigh.

You push further into him. You grind your hips, the movement deep and slow. Your hand tangles in his hair, gently guiding him to your lips. Your lips move against each other just as your bodies do, slow and sensual. You catch his lips between your teeth, nipping at it. He chuckles at your invitation, sliding his tongue inside your mouth and joining your lips once again. Below you, you feel another large hand hook onto your thigh. Both hands grip your thighs fiercely pulling them further apart, exposing your sopping pussy to the cold night air.

Slade breaks away from your kiss, his panting breaths hot fanning your face. You stare at each other with half-lidded eyes, lust bright in them even in the low light. He captures your lips again in a quick kiss before planting one on your shoulder. “Play with yourself,” he says, the command steady and rough against your ear.

The tone of his voice makes you shiver as you reluctantly release your hold on his shoulders. Keeping one hand tangled in his hair, you slowly slide your hand down your body, mewling into his skin when you reach into your neglected folds. You slip two fingers in immediately. You shudder and bite your lips trying to stop any obscene sounds from escaping.

A hand tilts your chin, coaxing you. “Good girl, look at yourself. Look just how wet you are just for me, kitten,” Slade says, nibbling at your ear. You yelp, your hips bucking into your hand, ass rolling against his member. You watch yourself in the mirror red-faced, open-mouthed, and sinful. Your dripping sex is in full view only obscured by your hand as your fingers dip in and out of your core. Slade’s eye never leaves the mirror even as he plants kisses against your skin. His large hand grasps your neck making sure you don’t look away from the mirror. You think of how easily he could break you and you feel like you’re on fire.

You're so close. You’re so so close. You can even see the desperation carving itself so plainly on your face. Anxiety and arousal mix into a potent cocktail in your gut. The nervousness from earlier rearing its ugly head. You whine in frustration, adding in a third finger but you can’t seem to reach over the edge. You hear him chuckle behind you and see him grin into your skin. At least, one of you was having fun.

He gives your shoulder another rough kiss, leaving a mark before speaking. “Having some trouble, kitten?” You wrinkle your nose at his tone but...in truth, you were. You bite your lip not knowing what to say. You’re so close but… the venue made you shy and that was an entirely different problem. Using the hand on your neck, Slade tilts your head towards him, the heat from his lips ghosting over yours. “All you have to do is ask for help, kitten,” he murmurs against your lips. The vibrations send another shockwave of desperation wreaking havoc throughout your already oversensitive body.

He tilts your head back to look at the mirror. You can feel your ears warm at the thought of begging but you’re a hair’s breadth away from your end. Biting your lips and furrowing your brow, you take a steadying breath but it still comes out breathy when you exhale due to the hand squeezing your thigh drifting closer to your core. He presses slow circles into your inner thigh with his thumb, his teeth nibbling at your shoulder leaving marks. A vicious curse leaves your lips blunted by a moan that follows it.

“Slade, please. Please. Sir, please.”

“Please what, Kitten? I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me.”

You tighten your grip on his hair and roll your hips against his. He growls in your ear but he doesn’t budge. “Use your words, kitten,” he commands, sounding far more patient than he actually is. You whimper, rocking against him. He holds you still, fingers digging into your flesh and body leaning into yours. “Words.”

You pant, hot breaths loud in your ears. Whether it was his or your own you were hearing, you didn’t know and didn’t care, not when your head was jumbled with the buzzing under your skin. You swallow. His eye following the movement of your throat and the silver glint of your tag winking at you in the mirror. “Slade- Sir, please- Please, I need you. I need you inside me.”

“That wasn’t too hard now was it?” He says capturing your lips in a rough kiss. You scream against his lips when you feel two large calloused fingers thrust into your core, stretching you replacing the ache in your core with a burning stretch. Slade releases you, steadying you so that your eyes are once again on the mirror. You both watch as his fingers pump in and out of you, the room filling up with your moans. “Keep your eyes on the mirror and watch as I make you cum.”

He presses his thumb against your clit. The syllables of his name coming out garbled and incoherent. You cum with a whimper. Your body shakes uncontrollably, your bones melting. Your lungs take in greedy gulps of oxygen feeling like the wind’s been knocked out of them. Slade lets your head lull back against his shoulder. You press little kisses against the powerful muscles of his neck. “Thank you, sir.”

Slade removes his fingers from your pussy, leaving you feeling empty. “Clean up the mess you made,” he orders, pressing wet fingers against your lips. You open your mouth letting them in. You slide your eyes shut and swirl your tongue around them. You bob your head taking them in deep. You moan, rocking your hips against his still hard cock, letting yourself imagine what it would be like to take him into your mouth. Your enthusiasm earns you a hiss from Slade. You smile as you continue to suck on his fingers and rock your body, the fire in the pit of your stomach reigniting. You flutter your eyes open. In the mirror, you see Slade, brow raised and mouth wrangled into a shape of wry amusement. “See, I knew you were a good girl,” he says voice strained. You grind your ass into him as you moan around his fingers. You gasp when a rough hand grasps your breast, nipple pinched between calloused fingers.

“Are you that hungry for my cock, kitten?” he asks, removing his fingers from your lips. Both your lips and his fingers glisten with your saliva. You nod not trusting your voice to be steady. He thankfully accepts it.

“Well, have at it,” he says, hands repositioning themselves on the back of the couch easing into a more relaxed position and looking as smug as humanly possible. He really is getting his money’s worth out of this. You shift your body making sure you brush up against his erect member as you did so. He looks almost pained when you finally face him. You drag your hands up and down his shirt, his muscles barely hidden by the soft silky material. You lick your lips, catching your bottom lip between your teeth. You slide yourself down his body, hands kneading and worshipping every stretch of muscle they come across. Fuck, they feel so good to your touch.

Getting to your knees, you rest your cheek against his knee. You let mischief shape your features. He quirks his brow at you, tilting his strong jaw urging you to move on. You massage his thighs as you pull yourself up. You undo his belt tossing it to the side. You pinch the zipper of his pants between your teeth and pull it down, grinning as you do it. Slade lifts his hips a bit to help you ease his pants and boxers down. Your mouth waters visibly when his cock springs free in all its glory. You gulp audibly as you figure the logistics of fitting all of it into your mouth.

“Take your time, Kitten. I’ve requested you for the whole night. We have time.” He drawls, smug. You roll your eyes at him finally deciding that head-on was the only way to tackle this. You lick a strip up his member paying special attention to the large vein running down the middle. You flick your eyes up to him, seeing his muscles tense. You grasp the base of his cock tight in your hand, kissing the tip and giving the slit a long, languid lick. The taste of precum wakes your taste buds. You hum, sucking lightly at the head, your hand twisting up and down his cock. His jaw tightens, the strain of keeping his hips still tightening the muscles of his thighs.

You spread your legs wide as you sink your head down taking him in and giving him a good view of your wet pussy. You take him in as far as you can, gagging when the head of his cock hits the back of your throat. The corners of your eyes sting with tears. You still yourself, letting your throat relax around him. You pull yourself back up. Your plush lips massage his length as you go and your warm hand not trailing far behind. You keep your mouth on the head of his cock before sinking back down. His sheer girth is sure to make your jaw ache but you couldn’t make yourself care, not when you’re growing wetter the more you worship his cock. Slade for his part looked like he was gonna tear the couch apart every time you sank down to take is cock on, the fluttering walls of your throat driving him up the wall. The soft music of the room was now barely audible against the mingling sounds of your moans. Slade’s unrestrained voice was dripped with whiskey and sin.

His cock twitches in your throat and it’s the only warning you get before cum splashes against the back of your throat and fills your mouth. You choke but when your eyes meet his, the muscles of your throat work automatically to swallow his load. The movement followed closely by his eye. You pull back, light-headed. He grabs your chin, tilting it up to inspect your mouth. He hums satisfied. “Kitten, that mouth of yours is definitely worth more than the price of admission.” He says brushing a thumb against your bottom lip as you pant.

A familiar ache in your core returns when your eyes land on Slade’s still hardened cock.

“Of course, a little cockslut like you wouldn’t be satisfied ‘til you’ve been filled,” he chuckles pulling you into his lap so that you’re facing the mirror, your dripping pussy hovering over his saliva covered cock. The throbbing head teasing against your sensitive folds. He kisses your shoulder, his teeth pinching your skin leaving another red bruise. You whine as he guides your hips, moving them to ever so slightly brush your core against his cock.

“Sir, please. I need you. I- I need you to fuck me,” you beg, hands tangling in his hair and eyes watching his member in pained hunger. You sound so needy but you also needed him inside you filling you up.

Slade hums in your ear approvingly. He pinches your ear lobe between his teeth, making you keen. “Well, since you asked so nicely.” That was the only warning you got before his hands guide your hips down onto his engorged cock. Your walls flutter with every inch, stretching you with every inch. A hand cups your breast while he continues to guide you down onto his cock. Rough calloused fingers knead your breast as he whispers compliments into your skin in between kisses. The cacophony of sensations is almost too much for you.

“Such a good cockslut, look at how well that tight cunt of yours is taking me in.” You roll your hips, urging him to quicken his maddeningly slow pace. He simply chuckles at your attempt as both his hands steady your hips. You almost cry in relief when he finally bottoms out. You pant savoring the burning stretch tearing at your insides. Pleasure and pain mingling in your sense.

Slade rests his chin against your shoulder, lips pressed to the shell of your ear. “Kitten, I want to watch you fuck yourself on my cock,” he says, in a low commanding tone making you shiver and leaving no room for arguments. You grip on to his arms, nails digging into the meat of his muscle, to steady yourself. You lean forward to get yourself into a better angle.

Ah ah ah

Breathy moans and the slap of skin against skin filled the air as you roll your hips against his. You watch yourself in the mirror, breasts bouncing, mouth hanging open, and tongue lolling out getting lost in the pleasure. The mixture of shadow and light highlighting and isolating the frantic need carving itself onto both of your faces. The coil in your stomach twists as your eyes meet his in the mirror. Icy blues trailing up and down your body possessively.

His hand wraps around your throat, squeezing it gently as he trails kisses up your spine. Your hips stutter, your walls squeezing around his cock. “You like that?” he whispers into your ear, putting just the tiniest bit more pressure around your neck. You feel your walls flutter around him and he moans in your ear. His other hand squeezes at your hip, nails digging into your soft flesh.

With a growl, he snaps his hips against yours almost violent in its intensity. You let out a loud yelp. Slade jackhammers into you like a madman, pummeling your pussy. His tongue dragging against your sweat-covered skin. “Cum with me, Kitten,” he grinds out, nipping at your ear. Your pussy clenches and unclenches around him trying to squeeze his cock, gripping him as if not wanting to let go of it. He bites a hickey into your neck and you feel the coil in your stomach burst. You feel a flood of warmth fill your aching core as Slade lets himself go.

He turns your body around to face him, careful not to separate you two. He pulls you into a deep kiss as both of you ride out your orgasms.

Your body slumps against Slade’s, head resting on his shoulder and chest pressing against his. Your breaths come out in puffs fanning against his neck. Slade presses a kiss to your forehead. You yawn and kiss his throat, his pulse hot against your lips.

“Satisfied?” he asks, pulling your wrist to his lips nipping and leaving marks on it. You wonder just how many marks he’s left on you and if he’s technically allowed to do that. It just seems bad for business.

“Yes, sir,” you answer, nuzzling into his shoulder. He chuckles, rubbing his large hands soothingly over your aching muscles. He holds you tenderly for a while, both of you basking in the afterglow.

Through thick lashes, you see Slade look at his watch. You whine when he starts to shift. Wrapping your arms around him, you press your body closer. You see his brow wrinkle and have to bite your cheek to stop yourself from smiling. Sucker.

Slade gives you another kiss as he reluctantly extricates himself from your warmth. You shiver at the motion. Your oversensitive walls flutter making him groan. You whimper at the feeling of emptiness as he gently places you on the soft cushions of the couch. He places another kiss on your forehead then your shoulder then your wrist as he drapes his jacket over you. “Sorry, kitten, I have some business I need to take care of,” he says tucking himself back into his pants. “But if you feel like a repeat performance, feel free to come back,” he continues, fixing his shirt as he grins down at you. Your stomach flips despite how tired you feel.

You watch him walk away then stop. “Oh and I’ll be keeping these,” he teases, holding up your panties and tucking them back into his pocket. You try to sit up intent on throwing the entire bottle of whiskey at him but your limbs fail you, still feeling like jelly.

The next time you open your eyes is when you feel someone patting your cheek lightly.

“March,” Anthony’s voice comes out in a haze. It takes a second for your mind to recognize the name as your alias. You take a deep breath trying to quell the panic from being woken up.

“What time is it?”

“A quarter past one.”

Good, you’ve only been asleep for an hour.

“Thanks.”

“You’re pretty lucky. Looks like Mr. Wilson was feeling generous,” Anthony laughs, thumb pointing to the stack of cash by the whiskey.

That asshole.

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Thanks for reading!

a/n: This will be a 3 part series because I am thirsty as hell.

Tag list: @batarella, @anothertimdrakestan , @lucy-roo , @multifandomgirl-us , @idkmanicantenglish ,@birdy-bat-writes , @americasmarauders , @l-inkage , @arestorationofbalance , @cloudie-skay , @wunderstell @hyp-oh-critical

#Slade Wilson #slade wilson x reader #slade wilson smut #slade wilson imagine #dc smut

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mst3kproject · 3 years

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The Neanderthal Man

Since I'm taking a break from fishmen, I might as well let Bigfoot catch up a bit. The Neanderthal Man isn't exactly a Bigfoot movie, but it’s along the same lines and its entire starring cast has MST3K pedigrees. Robert Shayne was in Indestructible Man and Teenage Caveman. Richard Crane was Rocky Jones, Space Ranger! Beverly Garland was in Swamp Diamonds and Gunslinger. Even the composer, Albert Glasser, wrote music for Invasion USA, Last of the Wild Horses, and almost all of MST3K’s Bert I. Gordon movies.

Some little mountain town in the middle of the Sierras (which the Portentous 50's Narrator takes some trouble to tell us is a primeval place where 'the defacing hand of civilization has fallen but lightly') is having a rash of saber-toothed tiger sightings! At first these are laughed off, but when the game warden himself sees one cross the road in the middle of the night, it's time to do something about it. The warden shows a cast pawprint to Dr. Ross Harkness in Los Angeles, who is interested enough to come up and see for himself. Local Mad Scientist Dr. Groves pooh-poohs the whole thing, which is enough to tell me that we're not dealing with a local cryptid here. Somebody is making prehistoric monsters.

So... I may not have actually run out of movies, but I seem to be running out of plots, because this is a remarkably similar movie to Monster on the Campus. The major difference between the two films is that Dr. Blake turned himself into a caveman by accident, while Dr. Groves here is doing it on purpose.

Another difference is that Monster on the Campus' story, while silly, was linear – events escalated in a way that felt logical, and there were reasons why things happened when and where they did. By contrast, The Neanderthal Man feels like a first draft. At the beginning of the film, we're dealing with the saber-toothed tigers that Groves has been creating by injecting cats with his de-evolution serum. We hear about these slaughtering game and livestock, and it seems like only a matter of time before they move on to human beings. The beginning of the film is quite upfront about the fact that Groves is responsible, too, as it is only mildly mysterious in its depiction of one of the creatures escaping his lab.

Sometimes the saber-tooths are represented by an actual tiger, usually filmed from behind or at a great distance so nobody has to put the prosthetic teeth on it. They do have prosthetic teeth, but they're only visible in a couple of shots. Imagine being at a bar and some guy tells you his job is sticking fake fangs on real tigers for a caveman movie! For close-ups, there's a hilarious puppet head that looks like the sort of thing you'd see mounted on a frat house wall as a joke. The director had the sense not to linger on this in motion shots, but later we see still photographs Groves has supposedly taken of his experimental subjects and they're even stupider-looking than we imagined.

Anyway, this goes on for a while with rising action, as the game warden goes to get Harkness and they manage to shoot one of the animals, only to have it vanish from the kill site when they try to show it to Groves (the movie never bothers to explain how that happened, incidentally. The ending suggests that the creatures change back when they die, but there's definitely no dead kitty cat at the scene, either). The whole movie could easily have just had the cats and their creator as the antagonists, perhaps even ending the same way as Dr. Groves proves his work to the other characters by injecting himself. That's not what happens, though. Instead, the story mostly forgets about the cats one we find out Groves has also been carrying on human experiments.

(Before himself, Groves' first experimental subject was his disabled Latina housekeeper. Another series of photos show her half-transformed into a cavewoman who for some reason is wearing drag queen false eyelashes. And as long as I'm talking about the movie being gross and bigoted, there's a bit where a woman is violently raped. This happens off camera, but the audience is not allowed to entertain any illusions about it.)

The problem is that before we see him give himself an injection in the arm, we have had absolutely no indication that Groves has been giving his serum to anything besides the cats! Cats are stealthy, cryptic creatures and if one of those has been seen wandering around killing things, then surely a full-on caveman beating people to death would not be able to stay out of sight! If what we were seeing were the first time Groves had tried the formula on himself then that would be an explanation, but his notes reveal that he's been doing it for so long that he's on the verge of losing control of the transformation and permanently reverting to a pre-human status, as indeed he does for the climax. Much like the stupid dinosaur in The Beast of Hollow Mountain, the movie's main monster is given no build-up whatsoever!

There's worse yet, though. The main characters, Dr. Harkness and Groves' daughter Jan, are barely involved in the 'caveman' part of the plot. They get phone calls about the various murders that Groves is committing in caveman form, and they snoop around the lab to figure out things the audience already knows. The same story could have been told without them, perhaps with the game warden and the hunter as protagonists, and it would probably have been more interesting. The script also repeatedly has Dr. Groves wander in and bluster about how the tiger sightings are hallucinations and tall tales, which seems a little unnecessary when we already know he's responsible. The film-makers can't seem to decide whether they want us to know that or not.

Dr. Groves wears glasses. Maybe the reason his primitive alter-ego is angry and breaking shit (although it does politely open and close the window it climbs out of, which made me laugh) is because it can't see. This is also my theory about why the Hulk smashes, and what do you know? In Avengers Endgame he's got Hulk-sized spectacles and only smashes when he's told!

The direction of The Neanderthal Man can probably best be described as 'serviceable'. It shows us what's going on, but doesn't particularly add anything to the proceedings. The 'Neanderthal' mask is immobile and uninteresting, not much better than somebody's Party City Sasquatch costume. Even the eyes are just painted on, meaning the poor guy in the costume can’t do much because he can’t see where he’s going.

The dialogue is often very strange, with characters talking like they're in a Jules Verne novel. If only one person did this, it might seem like a character quirk – it works for Dr. Groves, for example – but it's everybody. Seeing the cat carcass is gone, Harkness declares, “I refuse to believe in the supernatural! There must be some logical cause and effect to this unholy adventure!” Groves' fiancee Ruth berates him for ignoring her, saying, “I want you, the man I once knew! The good companion, the cheerful friend. I want the happiness we once found in each other.” It's bizarre to listen to, and often audibly awkward for the actors.

Monster on the Campus was kind of trying to be about how humanity must choose to evolve away from our inner savage, although the finale didn't bear that out. There's a scene in The Neanderthal Man in which this movie seems to be trying to go in the opposite direction, saying that we were never savage to begin with. Dr. Groves is speaking to a panel of scientists about the size of the brain in various 'primitive' species of human. He points out that by the time we reached Homo erectus we were already working with four times the cerebral jelly of a chimpanzee, and argues that our ancestors would have been recognizably human in their behaviour and problem-solving capacity.

(Amusingly, his chart of human evolution includes Piltdown Man, which was proven to be a hoax literally a few months after this movie's release. What makes this even more tragic for the writers is that their list of primitive humans seems to be the only place where they actually did any research.)

The problem with Dr. Groves' theory is that he already knows it's wrong. We soon learn that he's been experimenting on himself with his serum for a while already, and his notes show that he knows very well he regresses into a near-mindless animal. The movie does not even try to reconcile these ideas. If Groves were continuing his experiments in the hope that perfecting his serum would give him a more accurate reconstruction of ancient man, that would be one thing, but the script never goes there.

So now that we've had two 'man turns into caveman by injecting science juice' movies, of course I have to ask which one is better. Monster on the Campus wasn't a good movie but it was definitely an improvement on The Neanderthal Man in several respects, and although I don't have any way to find out for certain, I suspect it was an intentional remake. It's definitely more entertaining and gets bonus points for including the Meganeura dragonfly, but nothing in it is nearly as funny as The Neanderthal Man's fake tiger head. I guess if you're gonna watch one or the other, stick to Monster on the Campus, but if you're gonna watch both, start with The Neanderthal Man and do them in chronological order, the better to spot the inspirations and references.

Before I go, a fun paleontology fact: current thinking is that the saber-toothed cat's eponymous fangs actually didn't show when it had its mouth closed! There are zero cave paintings or ancient sculptures of a saber-tooth cat with teeth visible, and when scientists looked at the structure of the enamel in the canines, it suggested that in life the teeth were hidden by big, fleshy, St Bernard jowls. Google 'smilodon lips' and behold how this looks fully three hundred percent more ridiculous than you're imagining. I love nature.

#mst3k #reviews #episodes that never were #the neanderthal man #tw: rape #50s #curiously caucasian cavepeople

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angelmush · 2 years

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hey! I’ve got a 12 week old puppy who is very nibbly, have you got any tips on how to train her out of it? currently working on redirecting it to a chew toy but would love and advice (also realise she’s just a puppy and will grow out of it but would like to try!)

omg congrats on ur new friend!! my dog before goose was a super bitey puppy, that can be such a frustrating phase. i would do all the normal things, yelping, ending the game, walking away for a moment, then the redirecting to toys. and even still, with her it still felt like forever until the nipping stopped.

the biggest tip i can give u is that with dogs, behavior is communication. they are not trying to make u mad or be dominant over u, but a puppy that is relentless with biting at u is always telling u something.

1) teething is painful! mouthing helps soothes that pain and your hands are an irresistible temptation. this can be helped by providing chews (i like toys like chilly bones, bully sticks occasionally, or teething toys). puppies grow out of chewing on you because of teething around 6 months old, so hang in there!

2) they’re overtired! okay literally this one is what finally helped me with my bitey saint bernard. puppies are similar to human toddlers in that they ride the line of cranky and overstimulated when they need a nap, and often they won’t put themselves to sleep. if u have ever been playing w ur puppy for a long time and all of a sudden they shapeshift into a man eating shark with an insatiable craving for human flesh, they probably need to go into the crate for a nap. this for us was a game changer.

3) they’re frustrated! a puppy has a low tolerance for frustration typically, and they don’t quite now how to communicate it yet. no worries, they have 42 razor sharp puppy teeth to convey the message with. this may be accompanied by frustration barking too! trying to identify the source of the frustration is your best bet here (toy stuck under couch, water bowl empty, dog has to pee).

4) overarousal during play! your dog may just be having too much of a good time playing with you and riling himself up. this was definitely the case with my pup, she had a hard time regulating her excitement so she was almost always playing at a 10. when she would bite, i would end the game instantly. i would quickly and wordlessly put her in the crate to calm down. i would set the timer for 60 seconds and let her back out to play (if she wasn’t wining) after her little cool down time. this got her biting to end pretty fast!

5) hands are confusing little toys to a dog! i would like to note here that dogs also think human hands are so FUN! we wave them around their faces like little toys. and while we might be pushing them away to get them to stop biting at us, a dog sees that as such a fun game, and are inclined to give em a little chomp. crossing ur arms over ur chest is helpful at combatting this sometimes!

my last tip: never underestimate the power of managing the behavior instead of training it.

managing = things the human does to prevent the unwanted behavior from occurring (ex: clear the counters so dog isn’t tempted or rewarded by jumping up and countersurfing)

training = what we teach the dog to do instead of performing the unwanted behavior (ex: dog is taught a “leave it” command to ignore food on the counter)

my biggest life hack for puppies is to use a leash indoors (manage the behavior using the leash). your puppy cannot bite you if he can’t reach your hands because you are holding him at a distance with the leash until he calms down for a moment. leashes are so helpful with managing puppies!

i hope this was helpful info, though i am sure in your own research u have read most of this already hahaha. thanks for reaching out, i wish u and ur new friend good luck!!

#asks #dogs #long post

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silver-starlight-99 · 3 years

Text

Monsters at Work: The Jokester Generation

Chapter One: Everyone's Gotta Start Somewhere

Wow, I finally got around to writing this. To those who bothered to stick around since my initial Monsters at Work post, thank you.

To the newcomers, this fan fiction is based on the... I guess drabbles I'd written to create my own version of the animated series Monsters at Work, one where Boo would get to be an active part of the plot. While the events of Monsters University remain relatively the same, I am changing up certain events from Monsters Inc, following the arrest of Mr. Waternoose. I'll do my best to organically integrate the important parts of those drabbles into the story. But if you wanna read all the details yourself, feel free to check them out. Just think of it like an extended prologue:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

There will be other little things in regards to names and character descriptions that may be changed from their canonical iterations. Either for story reasons, because I didn't know about certain characters' official names, or just 'cause I wanna do my own thing. I might go back and change certain details if I feel the need to, but don't expect anything definate.

Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated.

As a mother and son drive through a bustling metropolis, a rather coincidental commercial is heard on the radio.

"The future is bright at Monsters Incorporated!

We power your car, we warm your home, we light your city.

Carefully matching every child to their ideal monster to produce screams, refined into clean, dependable energy.

Every time you turn something on, Monsters Incorporated is there!

We know the challenge: In a time where talk of alternative energies is becoming more common, it's hard to know who you can trust for reliable services.

The voice of narration changes to a flat, almost wooden tone. It's as though the Monster is reading his lines directly off the script, but even if he'd memorized what he had to say, he'd still use the same inflection. It's a change from the warm, grandfatherly timbre that belonged to the old CEO of Monsters Incorporated.

Not to worry. As always, MI prepares for the future. With the top Scarers in the country, the best in refineries, and ever-constant trials to explore more efficient scaring techniques.

The voiceover shifts once again, this time to someone younger, and far more enthusiastic.

That's right baby, we're working for a better tomorrow TODAY! Because we're Monsters Incorporated!

MI, Monsters Incorporated: We Scare Because We Ca-"

Millie turns off the radio as she reaches her destination. She parks her car and turns to look at her son Tylor, somewhat cramped in the seat next to her.

The younger monster's face is a mix of anxiety and anticipation as he gazes at the building outside. She’s not surprised. After all, he's been waiting for this day for what's seemed like his whole life. And Millie can't imagine the pouring rain outside is doing anything for his stress.

"Mom, you didn't need to drive me. I could've walked."

He wasn't wrong. The Tuskmon homestead was just a fifteen minute walk from their destination, maybe twelve if someone ran. And with Tylor's umbrella, designed specifically to cover his extra-long horns, the poor weather wasn't much of an issue.

I know, but I just wanted to make sure you were alright before your first day.” One of her hands cups his cheeks. The familiar gesture does help to relieve his nerves, just a bit.

"Have everything you need?”

Tylor grabs a thick, tan messenger bag from the back seat, and pats it in assurance. “Yeah, don’t worry. I triple-checked everything before we left.” His parents didn't have the kind of money to get him a fancy car or an elaborate summer trip like some of his fellow MU graduates, but he still appreciated his parents' gift. And, call it paternal instinct, but Bernard Tuskmon had the idea that his son would've been embarrassed to show up to his dream job toting around a lunchbox he'd had since middle school.

"And you're certain you don't want me to walk you to the door?" Millie gets very close to undoing her seatbelt before her son dashes out of the car, quickly trying to put on his new bag. The strap gets snagged on one of his horns.

"No no no! That's alright!" Tylor says in rapid succession. He fixes the bag strap. He's about to sprint to the door, but turns back around to his mother's window. "I promise I'll be fine. But I gotta get in to turn in my paperwork. See you later. Love you."

Millie chuckles in amusement, before giving him a wave as she starts the car back up. "Okay, I'll see you at five then. Love you, my baby behemoth!" Her voice is muffed by her window and the rain, but Tylor knows his mother well enough to get the gist of what she'd said.

Millie drives off, and Tylor groans in embarrassment. But a quick look around shows that everyone nearby is too busy trying to get out of the rain to have paid attention to him or his mother. He wants to take a moment to reflect on everything that's led to this day. All the hard work, sacrifices, and sleepless nights that got him to this moment. And how it will all be worth it when it's his efforts that are powering his hometown, and making his mark on Scarer history.

The screeching tires of a swerving car pull Tylor out of his mind. Just long enough for him to see the car in question, a sleek, yellow, six-wheeled beast of a machine rushing to the parking lot in the back of the building. Suddenly, he remembers the rain. And the fact that a cloth bag can only do so much before the water starts to get to the papers inside.

"Right. First day, big day!" He says, more to himself than to anyone nearby.

Following the example of his fellow monsters, Tylor rushes to the front doors, stubby tail wagging as his earlier anxiety gives way to excitement. On the way, he gives a spirited, "Mornin' co-worker" to a stout, crab-like monster wearing a thick, blue rain jacket. They're on an elevated platform, doing some kind of work on the building's famous We Scare Because We Care logo. Tylor gets through the doors before he can see the other monster wrench off one of the letters. The maintenance monster lets out an amused, "rookies" before shaking their head and moving on to the next letter.

"There's nothing to be worried about," Tylor reminds himself. "This wasn't a mistake, they specifically asked for you. They wanted you. You were meant to be a Scarer! Just show everyone your stuff and everything will be fine. Everything today is going to be fine!"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The warmth of the lobby is a relief to Tylor's skin, somewhat chilled after his time in the rain. He makes an honest attempt to get some of the water off his bag. After shaking off the last few droplets, he takes a moment to absorb his surroundings. This wasn't his first time inside the revered factory. Heck, for most Monstropolis natives, trips to Monsters Incorporated were considered a staple of elementary and middle school. It was no different for Tylor, having taken his first steps into this very lobby when he was seven years old. But that didn't take away from the sense of awe encompassing him. If anything, it was enhanced.

"Today, I'm not a guest, or just a visitor. I'm a Scarer, an actual Scarer. Huh, I wonder how many kids are gonna look up to me when I'm the one racking up the numbers."

Despite his familiarity from childhood, it is interesting to see the upgrades made since his elementary school days. They added a few more tables and chairs on the side for visitors. It looks like the tile work on the lobby dome had been refurbished; the rainbow of colors showing through even on a rainy day like this. And just above the ring of clocks showing all the different time zones are a bunch of tv screens, displaying a news channel or a number of Monsters Inc commercials.

Looking around, Tylor tries to see if he recognizes anyone there. It had been a while since he'd collected any Scare cards, but he did his best to stay updated on the top Scarers of all the major energy companies. Sadly, no one stands out.

"I guess that makes sense. It is early."

Anticipating his excitement for the day, Tylor had his mother drop him off ten minutes earlier than he needed. Just to give him the time to get all his fanboy-ing out of the way before he made a fool of himself in front of his more seasoned co-workers. "Would it be too forward to ask them for an autograph?," he wonders.

"Okay, first thing's first… " he mumbles to himself as he looks around the lobby.

Unsure of where to go, Tylor heads to the front desk for directions. The employee working there is an orange, bespectacled fellow who looks to be around his age, maybe a year younger.

"Uh, hi… Otis." Tylor says, spotting the receptionist's name plate. "I'm, uh. I'm sorry, this is my first day as a Scarer here. I was told I needed to bring in some special paperwork before I got my IDs, or my Scare assignment." Tylor pats his bag, indicating to the documents inside. "Do you know where I'm supposed to do that?"

The receptionist uses one of his many vine-like arms to pull out a clipboard. "Sure, I can help you. Name please?"

"Oh, right. I'm Tylor, Tylor Tuskmon. I got my acceptance letter from the Board of Directors, if that helps." He can't help but let a hint of pride ooze into his tone as he brings up his special letter of recommendation.

Otis flips through several papers before finding Taylor's name.

"Yup, here you are. Huh, you're not the only new guy coming in today."

Otis takes a moment to skim the rest of the document.

"Well, it looks like you'll need to stay here until someone from monster resources comes by to take your paperwork. And… then I guess they'll give you your assignment. They should be here in a few minutes."

"Great, thanks."

For the next few minutes, Tylor does his best to not look too awkward as he meanders by the front desk. But the child-like enthusiasm in his smile is too hard not to notice. Lucky for Tylor, the custodial and office workers already there are plenty familiar with that excitement, having seen it on the faces of many a Scarer on their first day. Most simply ignore him as they make their way to their departments. Others are at least courteous enough to wave back at Tylor as he gives an awkward "hello" to try and break the silence of the lobby.

By nine o'clock, Tylor isn't the only Scarer in the room. Slowly, one new face after another comes to the front desk, all with their own instructions to wait for a monster resources employee. By the fourth monster, Tylor decides to step in and explain the situation for the other new arrivals, giving Otis time to focus on his other responsibilities. Meanwhile, all the new Scarers engage in introductions and small-talk, most of which are just iterations of the same first-day excitement.

Five minutes after nine, a green, lizard-esque monster slithers into the lobby while carrying a box. He takes a moment to adjust his tie and glasses before approaching the front desk.

"Ahem, excuse me? Excuse me? May I have your attention?" the Monster asks as he tries to gain the attention of the crowd. All the Scarers are too engaged in their discussions to notice him. Otis is too preoccupied answering the phones to be of any help.

"Huh, newbies" the monster sighs, his irritation clear as he shakes his head.

The monster pulls a small notebook out of the box. He flips through several pages before finding something.

The monster shouts, with no small amount of sarcasm, "Oh no! A child has escaped from the Scare floor and is currently stealing monsters' bones!"

It's a ridiculous claim, but it does the job of getting everyone's attention. It's not just the new hires, suddenly everyone in the lobby is now staring at this diminutive monster, expressions varying from bewilderment to horror. He clears his throat.

"Ahem, now that I have your attenti- ACK!"

Suddenly, a monster decked out in a yellow hazmat suit bursts out of nowhere and tackles the smaller employee, restraining him. The whole action is so fast, Tylor almost misses the Monsters Inc logo on the suit's right side, just bellow the CDA agent's rank number.

In a distorted voice, the tackler barks, "We got a 16-2 in progress. The employee is secured. I repeat, the employee is secured. Do a sweep of the area. And we'll need someone to check in with the security team to see what they know about a loose kid!"

At their command, at least eight more monsters in the same yellow uniform pop out of nowhere to secure the lobby.

Some of them are using strange devices to scan the entrance and exit points. One can even be seen walking on the outside of the lobby's glass dome, looking for something. But mainly, these workers just keep everyone in place while the others do their jobs.

The green monster is unamused. "Oh for the love of Criamat. Unhand me, you overpaid oafs! I didn't mean it! I was just trying to get their attention!"

"Huh?" the CDA agent utters. He releases his grasp on the employee just a bit, before turning to one of his fellow operatives to see if their team's findings can confirm this.

"Wow, these guys are hardcore!" Tylor says in shock, some of his fellow newbies nod in agreement.

"Yeah, they're always like this," Otis chimes in, no less uncomfortable than the other new hires.

For a second, Tylor's mind goes back to one of his late-night research sessions at Monsters University. It wasn't necessary for Scarers to know much about the histories behind the major Scream factories, but he always liked to try and stay informed. He remembers reading about these guys.

After the event dubbed The Waternoose Scandal, Monsters Incorporated faced many visits from the CDA. Some were due to false alarms on the Scare floors, brought about by the jittery atmosphere lingering in the building. Others were the result of faulty tips the CDA received, made by paranoid Monstropolis citizens who believed the Tiny Terror of Monstropolis had snuck back into the city. It was impossible of course, the human was returned home and her door was shredded for good measure. But after the discovery of Waternoose's Scream Extractor, and a… rather unsettling chamber filled with child-sized cages, the CDA couldn't take any chances.

Eventually it became too much of a hassle, and a waste of resources to send so many agents to deal with false alarms. So the CDA stationed a small team of their own at Monsters Incorporated to assess any claims of child breeches and report back to the main facility if further assistance was necessary.

An agent with a 737 on his hazmat suit comes up to the one tackling the green monster. "736, it appears that Mr. Crummyham is correct. We haven't picked up anything on our scanners, and the security team came up empty too."

"I could've told you that!" Mr. Crummyham snaps.

"Also, sir," agent 737 continues, "we might want to bring in the team. 749 says our quarantine has caused a build up by the front doors, and the monsters are getting restless."

Muffled shouts and banging sounds are heard by the entrance.

Agent 736 sighs, disappointment evident even with his voice modulated by his suit. "Alright, bring it in everyone. It's a false alarm! Agents, clear out and head back to your stations."

The agents do so, with 749 slipping off the roof because of the rain.

Agent 736 helps Mr. Crummyham up and hands the employee back his box.

"I'm sorry for the inconvenienc-"

"Touch me again and I'll have your pay docked!" The assaulted employee snaps back.

The agent sighs, "whatever," before calling back the rest of his team.

As the last of the suited monsters leave, the front doors open, and a wave of new monsters pour in, all desperate to get out of the rain.

Tylor might have tried once again to see if he recognized any of the incoming Scarers. But he, much like all the others by the front desk, were still reeling from… whatever you want to call what just happened. If there's any good that came from the whole affair, at least it got everyone's attention on Mr. Crummyham. Who furiously scratches out something in his tiny notebook as the atmosphere in the lobby shifts to a busy hum.

"Well then," he begins, doing his best to regain his composure. "I am Mr. Crummyham from monster resources. I imagine you all have questions in regards to the paperwork asked of you to bring in today?"

Murmurs of agreement are heard from the crowd. "And our Scare assignments!" Tylor chimes in.

The green monster nods in confirmation.

"To answer your questions, you're all being assigned to a floor with a specific set of regulations. It's nothing dangerous, but a certain amount of confidentiality will be required until you've all been officially cleared."

The green monster opens his box to reveal several thin folders.

"By one thirty, you'll all be expected to meet in conference room B. There, you'll meet your floor supervisor, learn more about your given assignments, and have the time to get any other questions you have answered. But until then…"

The monster resources employee reads the name labeled on each folder and begins to hand them out. In return, the new hires hand him their own documents stapled together.

"You will be temporarily placed in another department."

Everyone's faces shift to express their personal level of confusion or shock.

"Wait, what?" Tylor exclaims.

"Is this like, a downsizing thing?" Another monster asks.

"But we're still getting paid the same as a Scarer, right? I really need the money," says another in the crowd.

"How long are we expected to work like this?" an anxious voice pipes up.

Quickly, the lobby is flooded with the sound of questions. But unlike the last time, all it takes is for Mr. Crummyham to raise his hand in a halting motion to get everyone to go quiet. He continues to hand out folders while talking.

"I'm sorry, that's all I know about this arrangement. Please wait until the meeting this afternoon to express your concerns. In the meantime, I advise all of you to get to your departments. If any of your supervisors get on your case for being a little late, just blame the CDA. I always do." He says that last bit with something almost akin to a smirk, before it returns to his usual, tired expression.

"In case you're worried, each of your MI applications have been read through to ensure you're somewhere that best suits your pre-existing skill sets. Please wait until after the meeting if you want to talk about changing positions."

Mind frazzled as he tries to process everything, Tylor almost misses Mr. Crummyham mumble a "good luck" to him specifically as he hands the maybe-scarer his new assignment.

"Huh… wait, what did yo-" Tylor tries to ask. The green monster finishes handing out folders and addresses the crowd once more.

"You'll find a general map of the facilities in your folder to help you find your department. If you still get lost, don't be afraid to ask someone for directions."

With his task completed, Mr. Crummyham picks up his box, now filled with everyone's entry paperwork, and leaves the lobby.

Tylor, along with his fellow newbies, is still trying to make heads or tails of the whole situation, unsure of what this development means for his career. Suddenly, he realizes something.

"Wait, he didn't even give us our IDs!" Tylor exclaims, his frustration causing him to raise his voice.

"Maybe we'll get them after the big meeting?" Someone answers back.

"Why is it so hard for them to give us answers?" Someone on the other side of the crowd asks.

It is a small, orangey-red, winged monster who breaks the growing tension. Tylor can't remember the guy's name, but the other newbie's southern twang helps him to stand out.

"...I, I guess I'll just head on over to my new department. I'll see you fellas later." With that awkward goodbye, the orange monster flies out of the lobby, personal folder clutched in his tiny talons.

Unsure of what else they can do, the others in the group follow suit, slowly trickling out as they follow their personalized maps. Everyone except for Tylor. He stays behind, his befuddled expression never leaving his face as he looks through his thin folder.

"Hey… Otis?" Tylor asks, having to remind himself of the receptionist's name by checking his plate again. "I don't see a map, or any directions in my folder. Do you know where I can find… the MIFT department?" he asks, unsure if he's pronouncing the name correctly.

"The what?" Otis replies.

Tylor's about to elaborate, when a loud but distant gasp grabs his attention. The gasp is accompanied by the rumbling engine of some kind of cart. Both sounds grow louder as they approach the front desk, and very nearly hit the purple monster.

The maintenance cart halts, but the driver's gasp continues, though it is clear now that it's an exclamation of excitement rather than shock. The driver, revealed to be an orange, furry monster wearing a blue lanyard and a tiny blue helmet, keeps on gasping, but now has a look on her face that implies she wants Tylor to say something. Tylor himself maintains a confused expression, unsure of how to respond. Though mildly impressed she's managed to gasp for a full minute without looking like she's seconds from passing out.

Eventually, the orange monster stops. Her expression changes from one of absolute jubilation to one of confused amusement. She takes a second to try and study the purple monster's face.

"Tylor? Tylor Tuskmon?" She asks.

"... Ye- yes?" He replies.

"Tylor, it's me, Val! Val little!"

His mind's drawing a blank. Weather or not she realizes this, Val continues,

"Monsters University, freshman year. We had that Origin of Fear class together. I guess you didn't recognize me because I'm doing my hair different now." Val playfully bats at her magenta hair buns. "It's just that, where I work, there are a lot of little hazards I always have look out for. Eventually, it was just easier to cut it and make 'em into these cute bun-thingies."

"Right, Origins of Fear." Tylor eventually gets out. "Since it was such a big class, I guess… well…" Tylor doesn't know how to keep going without this conversation turning awkward. "So, you work here now? When, uh, so when did you graduate?"

"College? Yeah, that was an interesting detour. Too much of a commitment for me. Not really a regimented, stuffed-shirt, college-scene kind of gal. Blegh! But enough about me, what've you been up to?"

"Graduating from college." Tylor replys, not sure how to take the monster's blase attitude towards his alma mater.

Now it's Val's turn to be embarrassed. Realizing she may have hit an unintended nerve, she gives a sheepish, "Huh, well, good for you."

"Yeah, it's...it's great."

"I mean, except for the loan debt. That's gotta be like, ka-ching! Or, I guess in your case, ka-ching ka-ching! Because you know, you actually graduated"

"Scarer Cum Laude, actually. I graduated Scarer Cum Laude from MU, top of my class. And now…" Tylor looks back at his folder with uncertainty and a bit of bitterness.

"Now, they've got me working with MIFT, whatever that-"

Another joyous gasp escapes from Val. "No way! You're our new MIFTer?"

Tylor gives an uncertain shrug, but is quick to correct her. "Temporary MIFTer, but, yeah. I guess I am."

"Tylor, that's my department! Come on, I'll take you!" She pats the adjacent seat on her cart.

Unsure of how else to find MIFT, or even the specific details of what MIFT is, Tylor puts his folder in his bag, and hops aboard Val's cart.

He and Otis share a wave goodbye before Val drives them both out of the lobby.

"This is crazy right? I drop out of college, you graduate from college but we end up working at the same place. COSMIC!!!"

"... Yeah that's… one way of putting it."

The two continue to ride along until something catches Tylor's attention.

"Woah woah woah, hold on a sec! Is that a Scare floor?" It's the first time since his initial arrival that his mood shifts back to something genuinely excited.

Val takes a second to stop her cart in front of the aforementioned Scare floor. It's from a distance, but the two can see the Scarers and their station assistants begin to prepare for their busy day ahead.

"Yup, but I wouldn't get your hopes up Tylor. We only head in whenever there's a problem with the machines. And that isn't too often."

Val starts up her cart once again, and goes on to talk about… seemingly anything and everything. But by this point, her tag-along is already tuning her out.

"It's just a minor setback, that's all this is," Tylor reminds himself. "Just a few hours at… whatever MIFT is, and then your real Scarer career will begin. Everything will get back on track. Everything is going to be fine."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Something Tylor discovers pretty quickly is that Val is a very chatty monster.

"Sorry about the whole missing-map thing. It's just that, when I first started working here, I think I got lost every other day on the way to the office. It's a total maze down there if you don't know how to find the right landmarks. If you can find them at all. Sometimes the lights on the lower levels don't get replaced on time, so some places just look like flickery hallways. Which is why I decided, if MIFT ever got any new members, I would personally chaperone them to and from the office. Just to help them find their footing, ya know? But to be fair, we have a pretty understanding boss, so don't worry if you still wind up coming in late sometimes."

It's all rather sweet, if only Tylor wasn't too lost in his own mind to register it.

"Gagh, it smells awful down here. I gotta remember to clean up before the meeting this afternoon, can't let these fumes seep into my skin. But it's okay, it's just gonna be for a few hours. Then I'll finally get my IDs and... what could be so special about my Scare assignment? I really hope dad wasn't right about this."

The rest of the drive to MIFT goes on like this; Val doing her best to be approachable, but completely blind to her passenger's disinterest. There are a few seconds where Tylor gets the feeling he's being watched while the two of them are in an old elevator, but he chalks it up to his frazzled nerves.

"... and well, I guess you could say I learned the hard way to always put the plastic down before cleaning up the bloo- oh hey, we're here!"

"Huh?" Tylor asks, knocked out of his thoughts for a second.

Val drives her cart up to a building that seems to be built into the wall, just bellow some kind of underground door track. While appearing sturdy, this section of the factory looks to be far less maintained than the clean lobby or the immaculate Scare floors above. Here, specs of rust can be seen on some of the larger pipes. The paint on the front doors is chipping away. And then there's that weird, stale odor lingering in the air.

Overall, MIFT headquarters could've looked worse… but that doesn't do much to improve Tylor's already bitter opinion on it.

"Yup, here it is, MIFT headquarters!" Val does an impromptu little song to build up the team's supposed grandeur. Its meaning is lost on Tylor who's doing his best not to roll his eyes while she's watching.

"Okay," she continues once her song is done. "You can just head on in through those doors. I'll be in in a sec, I just need to park this bad boy." Val loving pats the steering wheel of her beat-up little cart.

"Alright, sure."

Tylor walks up the steps and through the double doors to see a simple office space. A small kitchen area to his right with a beat-up vending machine in the corner. To his left is what looks like a makeshift meeting area, complete with a scratched up table, several plastic chairs, and a large dry erase board. The rest of the room seems to be several cubicles, with one larger walled-off office against a back corner.

But none of that is what has Tylor's attention. It's that it should be the start of the work day, yet this place seems to be totally empty. Even the lights aren't on. It's only by the light coming through the front doors' frosted glass that Tylor can see anything.

"Uh, hello?" He asks aloud. He's almost expecting a bunch of monsters to jump out of nowhere, welcoming the new hire with a loud obnoxious party.

"If they're anything like her, that doesn't sound too far off." He ponders.

It's a few seconds before he gets a response.

"MIFTer!" Someone quietly calls out, like a stage whisper. It seems to be coming from a door on the other side of the room.

Tylor isn't sure if he heard correctly.

"MIFTer!" They call again, just a bit louder.

"Huh, maybe I wasn't too far off with that party idea." Tylor wonders. He sets his bag on the scratched table, and walks towards the door, taking his time to make sure his horns don't bump into something by accident.

"MIFTer!" Someone just shouts regularly, sounding impatient.

Surprised, Tylor accidentally bumps one of his horns against a wall, leaving a very noticeable scar. Internally debating whether or not to leave a note to explain things, he is interrupted once again by a-

"MIFTER ALREADY!"

Deciding to deal with it later, he rushes to the blue door the sound's been coming from, and goes through.

Tylor is met with a seemingly empty, pitch black room.

"Uh, hello?"

As though responding to his voice, Tylor begins to hear some kind of rhythmic drumming. It's a simple, steady beat, but one that begins to fill the young monster with a confused sense of dread.

Until suddenly, there is a bright light directly over him.

"Young neophyte! Take swift to repairs, I welcome you to MIFT!" Someone proclaims in a jaunty, sing-song manner.

That someone is revealed by another burst of directed light. It is an older, furry monster with a single eye above his tapir-like nose. But what catches Tylor's eyes is what the monster is wearing; a fuzzy orange robe, some kind of necklace made from different colored paper clips, and a… crown (?) that's just an orange traffic cone with a wrench taped to it and leaves coming out the top.

A fashion statement this is not, but it certainly is eye-catching.

"Yes, MIFT!" The larger monster exclaims as he shimmies over, and puts a hand on the shoulder of a bewildered Tylor.

"Since the day Monsters Incorporated was founded, there was a need. A need for monsters behind the monsters. The unsung heroes!" The monster continues as he gestures in front of him.

Suddenly, there is a bit more light in the room, but not enough to fully illuminate it. It is enough to show that what Tylor initially believed to be an empty room was actually rather packed. Going all around the walls are somewhere between twelve to sixteen monsters wearing orange hoodies, makeshift robes or bathrobes. All of them are holding large buckets upside down, and are the source of the rhythmic drumming.

"M.I.F.T!" Says a group of four.

In front of Tylor and the jaunty monster are four MIFT employees. Val is one of them, eagerly shaking a wavy piece of metal panel, wearing an orange robe and a rainbow taped to her Monsters Inc helmet. Beside her is a pea-green monster in another robe, his wings sticking out of holes in the back, with paper wrench cutouts taped to his helmet. He plays a pan flute made from smaller pipes, but doesn't look as into it as Val. On one end of this lineup is a blue crab-like monster in an orange jacket that Tylor can't help but find to be familiar. The only accessories she has are two dented pipes on her helmet, similar to the pipes she's using to play her own bucket-drum. And on the other end is a small, three-eyed monster that kind of looks like a slightly peeled green banana. He's wearing what appears to be a coffee filter as a makeshift tutu, and a bunch of orange straws taped to his head. The only instrument he has is a tiny noisemaker, but is also making fart noises with his nozzle-like mouth.

...you know, when I describe it like that, I can't really blame the look of absolute "what-the-fuckery" on Tylor's face.

"Is this a cult? Did I just step into some kind of freaky corporate cult thing? Seriously, all this is missing is the runes drawn in blood and the virgin sacrifice to tie it all together. Wait... would I be the sacrifice in this scenario!?"

The monster to his side, seemingly oblivious to Tylor's reactions, continues his little speech.

"If a part breaks, we fix it! If a machine needs maintenance, we maintain it! This elite squad of polished professionals, each of them an expert in their fields! They are the girdles-"

"Girdles?" Tylor pipes in, unsure if he's hearing that correctly.

"Girders," the blue monster supplies.

"Griddles!" The "crowned" monster decides on.

"... upon which the factory stands! And Monsters Inc is a very big factory! But before we proceed, how about a few words from our esteemed initiate?"

Finally, in this whirlwind of weirdness, things are starting to make sense to Tylor.

"Oh, oh! This is an initiation ceremony."

"I mean, I guess that's better than what I was thinking. But... I should still be careful. If Oozma Kappa was anything to go buy, ceremonies like this can go from weird to fire-hazardy real fast."

Hey guys, this- this has all been… great. But this is just a temporary thing. So-"

"So you're leaving?" The green monster interrupts, a suspiciously eager gleam in his four eyes. Suddenly, Tylor recognizes this voice as the one calling out to him just minutes ago.

"Leaving in a cardboard tube most likely." Added the monster with the bucket drum. "Just like Rodney after that hydraulic press incident. Flat Rodney." Her blase tone makes it very hard for Tylor to tell if she's being serious, or trying to make a morbid joke.

Before he has the time to question things, one of the monsters by the walls comes forward to slide a beat-up toolbox towards him with an eager, "heads up!"

"Behold!" Decrees the crowned monster as he opens the box, "You will signify your readiness, for everlasting membership-"

"Everlasting?"

"With your first sacred tool!"

He pulls out an electric toothbrush.

There's a look of realization on the blue monster's face "Oh, so that's where I put it. Thanks!" She takes back her toothbrush and stuffs it away in her jacket.

The crowned monster pulls a wrench out of the box, and gently hands it to Tylor. "Tylor, I beseech you. Wrench the nut!"

"What kind of nut are we talking about? 'Cause I have allergies."

Another hooded MIFTer pops into the light, rolling along a tool cart, a heavy-duty clamp on it holds a plank of wood in place. This plank looks old, but ornately painted with blues and whites. Proud to be MIFT is painted in the center, surrounded by the names of fellow employees scratched into the wood. An old bolt is wedged between the lines of the painted motto, and on its end is a large silver nut.

Tylor is gently nudged closer to the plank.

"Wrench the nut! Wrench the nut! Wrench the nut." It's what everyone is chanting by now, some admittedly more into it than others. The green monster looks like he wants Tylor to burst into flames for some reason.

The crowned monster continues, "You're on your way, to a lifelong membership in MIFT! Do not feel unworthy, young neophyte. Fulfill your joyous destiny, and wrench that nut!"

"Wh- what? I don't- No, I don't want anything to do with this nut. You people are crazy!"

By now, everyone's gotten into a frenzy. The chants are growing louder, and one of the hooded drummers has gone completely off the rhythm and is doing his own kickass solo.

"It's just a temporary job, it's just temporary. Just give the cultists what they want, and soon you'll never have to see them again. Everything will be fine"

"Ok, fine, fine fine fine! If it'll get you guys to stop chanting!"

Not seeing any other choice, Tylor takes his wrench, and proceeds to wrench the nut.

...or try to, at least.

It's been a while since he'd even held a wrench, let alone used one. And the growing noise certainly isn't helping his concentration.

"Uh, is the ground supposed to be shaking like this?"

Tylor isn't mistaken, as he continues to try and wrench the nut, the ground does seem to be rumbling, as though going through minor earthquakes. And it's somehow keeping in time with the beating of the drums (minus that one guy.)

"It will all be okay, you just gotta wrench this stupid nu-"

With a wrench that's just a bit too powerful, Tylor causes the nut to pop off its bolt, and roll through the gap in a nearby floor grate.

Suddenly, everyone goes silent, except that one drummer guy. His grand finale serving as the drum roll to follow the nut as it descends deeper into the pipe system. This goes on for a full minute, until the echoes of the nut can be heard no more, and the drummer lets out an enthusiastic, "Wooohooo!" before finishing his number, and passing out from exhaustion.

There is a beat of silence before the crowned monster speaks.

"Good enough. Tylor Tuskmon, welcome to the Monsters Inc Facilities Team! Now then, how's about we get you settled in?"

"... Are we just not gonna talk about the mini earthquakes!?"

#monsters inc #monsters at work #monsters at work: the jokester generation #fanfic #link post #lengthy post

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divineluce · 3 years

Text

And from the Ashes || Leah, Luce, Morgan, Nell, & Rio

Timing: Late at Night May 26th, 2021

Location: A burnt out clearing in the Outskirts

Tagging: @phoenixleah, @divineluce, @mor-beck-more-problems, @nelllraiser, @3starsquinn, and featuring Bernard Burnie the Phoenix

Description: The time has come to try and save the phoenix.

Running a hand through her hair, Luce looked at the clearing that she’d led the others to. It was a wide-open space, already charred and covered in ash- she’d first spotted the burnt-out area when she and Adam had posted up in the burnt out shell of a building on Scorch Street. She’d ventured out here on her own a few days before, dragging as many branches she could manage into the center of the neat circle of blackened soil. They needed a pyre, a central place for the magic to be channeled, to catch the energy they poured into the spell. They. That assumed that she’d be able to do something, that she’d be able to… summon the flames.

Luce dropped the gas can she’d hauled into the woods with a heavy, sloshing thud. There were already a few cans lying at the edge of the clearing, a contingency plan courtesy of Adam. He’d been game to help with the setup, loaning her what equipment he had to help. Nell knew how to pick ‘em. Even if he was some kinda doomsday prepper. “Here we go. Rio, you’ve been looking at the wards, right?” She said, gesturing to the area around them. “I’m not sure how big we need to go… Would you know anything about the scope?” Luce asked, glancing over at Morgan with a tentative gaze. The scratches that ran along her body were still scabbed over and angry to the touch, even with the help of Nell’s poultices. “Nell, do you want to get started with the herbs? Leah should be out looking for the phoenix, hopefully we have some time before she radios us that they’re on the move.” Luce said as she unzipped her backpack and began to pull out the various ingredients the ritual required. A silver mortar and pestle, courtesy of Bea, the Bloodroot, the jar of corrupted resurrection dirt, another glass with the phoenix’s still smoldering ashes, and bundles upon bundles of sage and lavender. Pulling the last vial from her pocket, Luce stared at the small bottle of phoenix tears. This had to work. It had to work.

Leah Ramirez was not an improviser. Not by any means. For an event like the one they were attempting to go as smoothly as possible, it was incredibly important to plan out every detail down to the second, and then establish a plan B, C, D… all the way to ZZ in case things didn’t go as planned. It was admirable how determined Luce was to save this poor soul. Leah always knew she had a huge heart, but for whatever reason, she wasn’t always a big fan of showing it. This needed to go well- if not for the phoenix, for Luce. For her to know it was okay to openly care about something and to ask for help.

Her job was simple enough. Find the corrupted phoenix, entice him to chase her, run to the clearing, help with the ritual. It wasn’t hard to find him, either. He’d been leaving a path of destruction for weeks now, and she followed the path of ash and char that he left behind until she found an area that was still very much on fire. The flames didn’t scare Leah- they couldn’t hurt her. And she hoped if what she’d heard about corrupted phoenixes was true, he’d get frustrated at the lack of damage he was doing to her and chase after her. If not, there was always plan ZZ. But when she finally laid eyes on him, it felt like a punch to her gut. She’d seen plenty of phoenixes in their flame state before, but her family was always so careful to be controlled and calm in their flame presentation. They had the privilege of years of training, not to mention the ability to change back if it all became too much. The corrupted phoenix, on the other hand, was raging, stuck in an eternal flame state with no way of connecting with anyone or anything. Of course he was destroying the world- it was the only way he could get its attention. She radio’d the group from her safe distance, watching the phoenix to see if he’d noticed her. “Found him. Let me know when you’re ready.”

Orion had stayed up half the night drawing the runes that Luce had sent him. He wasn’t sure how much the group would need, so he figured he should do as many as he possibly could. He kept his bag full of them, weighing on his back as he followed the group to the clearing Luce had prepared. From the looks of it, Luce had been hard at work to get things ready for the spell. While the rest of the group was probably used to stuff like this, Rio hadn’t taken part in many spells. He was equal parts excited and nervous. Something like this was an entirely new experience to learn about. It was every scribe’s dream. On the other hand, Luce had already warned him how much energy this would take. This wasn’t going to be a simple spell, one thing gone wrong could screw everything up. Rio just wanted to make sure he wasn’t the cause of any mess ups.

Once they were together in the clearing, Rio dropped his back and pulled the stack of paper with the wards drawn on them. “Yeah, I’ve got a bunch. Just tell me what to do with them. I’ll follow everyone else’s lead. I think I’m the newbie here.”

Morgan double checked the notes she’d made on her phone. “Bigger might be safer,” she said. “Wider net, easier catch.” But not too big, or else the energy needed to power the space might increase to dangerous proportions. She came over to Rio and showed him the diagram she’d made. “If we give ourselves a twenty foot diameter, you should be able to put down the runes in intervals of two feet. Move clockwise and make sure they’re all oriented the right way, okay?”

That done she went over to Luce, who was looking a little uneasy. “Hey. This’ll work if you let it, okay? You can help him.”

Nell was tired. But that seemed to be the beginning of every thought she has of late. It was getting to the point of being exhausted from the constant state of emotional tiredness, which often left her feeling either drained, irritable, or both. As she bent over her densely packed sticks of herbs, she did her best to banish the sensation of lethargy seeping into her bones, shaking herself out of its grabby hands to gather the strength she’d need for the coming ceremony. If there was one thing that could spark her massive reservoirs of determination, it was a sister in need— and as Nell let her gaze wash over Luce, and all the physical as well as emotional cuts and scrapes it’d taken her to get here, it was obvious Luce was certainly in need.

She didn’t have fire like her sisters, so when she lit the herbs to cleanse and purify it was with the lighter from her pocket. Blowing softly over the end of it, she let the flame peter out until a steady trail of smoke was rising from the end of the bundle before handing it off to Rio. “Take this with you, too.” Did he have enough hands for it? MAybe he could stick it in his pocket or something. Or- “I can walk with you if you need it.” Then she was on to lighting the next stick of herbs, keeping this one for herself.

Rummaging around in her pockets, Luce pulled out the shitty little Zippo lighter she kept on her. She’d never had to actually use it, but now might be the time. If her flames didn’t come, she’d find a way to make sure that this worked. One way or another, she’d get fire to burn and to hopefully, hopefully put an end to this person’s nightmare. After all this time, the weeks of work trying to gather the ingredients she needed for the ritual, she hadn’t paused to think about how they must be feeling in the middle of all this. Were they still in there? Or were they lost to the fire, like she had been? The walkie talkie on her belt buzzed and she heard Leah’s staticky confirmation. “Sounds good. We need a bit more time, but I’ll give you the signal when we’re ready.”

“Bigger is better, I’ll take your word on that. Thanks for drawing those up, Rio.” Luce said, looking closely at the runes he’d drawn. Damn. For a Scribe who claimed like he didn’t know what he was doing, they looked damn good. Like, really fucking good. And Morgan knew what she was doing, she could guide him as they set the perimeter of the ritual site. Sucking in a deep breath, she cast Nell a tense grimace of a smile before staring at the silver mortar in front of her. The ingredients were all here. She just had to… tap into the magic. Flexing her hands, she unstoppered the bottles and began to mix them together “The corrupted earth with tears to mend,” She muttered quietly to herself, trying to reach for the magic that lived within her. Fear gripped at her heart as she tried to feel the connection and found… nothing.

Leah couldn’t have taken her eyes off the corrupted phoenix if she tried. The way he moved and raged through the forest, his path clear but his goal unsolidified, it fascinated her. She wanted to take it all in, write it down and warn family members about the dangers of changing their ways. She took another step forward toward him, and suddenly, he whipped around to stare at her, flames angry and dark. For a while, there seemed to be nothing else, just two phoenixes, born of very different circumstances, staring at each other and waiting for the other to make a move. Could he sense what she was? Was he confused by her lack of fear? She took another step forward, right into the charred remnants of a tree that were still on fire. We’re the same, she was trying to tell him. We can be the same. In her time observing him, this was the first time she’d seen the phoenix still. “We want to help you”, she said, quietly. Would he hear her? Could he understand? But as quickly as it had seemed to pause, his rage picked up again, and soon, he was barreling toward her. The radio secured at her shoulder buzzed, with Luce indicating they weren’t ready. Shit. As he ran toward her, she thought quickly, switching into her flame state.

Now they were really the same.

With the two phoenixes both engulfed by their flames, there was no solid body for the corrupted one to ram into, no destruction he could cause. He whipped around again to look at her, and for another moment, as if there were a second of clarity. But again, it didn’t last. Leah switched back, and began running toward where the phoenix had come from, into the fiery destruction he’d been wallowing in. “We want to help you” she cried as she heard him begin to run after her.

Morgan watched Nell and Rio get to work laying the circle and burning their bundles. There was another one for her, but she hesitated to reach for it. This wasn’t an afternoon in her studio or a hopeful exercise for her peace of mind. Someone’s life was hanging in the balance. All of theirs, really, if you factored in the risks of this going sideways. What good was the energy of a dead woman with no direction? And yet. She felt useless, just standing there. Sure, she’d helped Luce work out the magic maths for the circle and organize a delegated plan, but that was theory, that was cozy. She wanted to help, if only to prove that she still could. That she hadn’t given up yet. So she picked up the last bundle and lit it up. She could smell none of the smoke that rose from the black and orange crackling ends, but she remembered her own rituals in the woods when she was trying to learn blood magic. She remembered her fear of being shut down by the universe, of being turned away by her friends, and the way her hope trembled as the smoke cleansed the hurt from her space. As she did the last thing, the only thing she could, she prayed to the earth below them that this phoenix would have his hurt wiped away too.

“I think that’s about it. Everyone ready?”

Orion had a stack of papers in his mouth, hanging on by the corner of the paper as he moved along the path, more paper in one hand and the burning herbs that Nell had passed to him in the other. He had assured Nell that he was fine, but one misstep and he would tumble. He followed Morgan’s directions, placing the runes around in a large circle and watching the other group carefully. Everyone looked incredibly focused. Just another hint that this was serious. Stuff like this must be second nature to them, yet there was a lot of care and detail put into every single step. It made sense, from what Rio knew about spells, the devil was in the details. Sometimes literally he supposed. But the smallest inaccuracy could cause horrible side effects. His chest tightened at the thought of what backlash could come if something go wrong, but he shook it off quickly. He had been injured trying to help others. It had never changed his mind before, he wasn’t about to let today freak him out.

Once the circle was complete he gave a thumbs up towards the group just in time for Morgan to ask if they were ready. Honestly, Rio had no idea if they things were ready, but he eyed the gas cans around the circle. He figured those would come into play once the spell started. “All set” Rio confirmed, moving in the circle to join with the others.

None of them were wholly fireproof anymore despite having taken their own footsteps through the flames of their existence, and Nell was no exception. Each one of those present had all weathered their own firestorms, walking straight into infernos that had every right to have felled them where they stood. But still they persisted, like the embers of a life refusing to be snuffed out despite all the gusts buffeting them from sometimes all sides. Fire was life and death, as cyclical as anything else in the magic. That’s what Nisa had tried to teach her daughters while they’d grown amongst the trees of the forest. It could steal life in a moment, burning a person out of existence until they were no more than ash on the wind, but as was the way with everything in the world it had the other face of its coin. Warmth, cauterizing, cleansing. In and of itself fire was the most alive of the elements, flickering with a spirit and will of its own. And yet that same life was so good at snuffing out others.

Nell didn’t have the fire her sisters had once wielded, so she’d thought the lessons didn’t apply to her. But she had her own flame living in her chest, the same heat that had told her to kill Montgomery and to make it hurt. The searing anger that had her digging a knife into Frank’s side, and poised to smother his own fire. Maybe they all had flames living within them, dangerous if left unchecked. Luce had left her flames to themselves since nearly a year ago to the day, or maybe it had been even longer. Nell had too. But she was watching in real time as her sister tried to reign them in, reignite them in a way that didn’t end with screams and acrid stench of burning flesh. It was enough to make Nell wonder what the peace on the other side might be like, whether she might one day give up the things fueling her flames to try her own hand at seizing it. Today wasn’t about her, though. That much she knew as she came out of the circle she’d walked to slip her hand into Luce’s for a squeeze. “We’ll make this work.” Luce wasn’t alone, and she’d be sure to remind her sister of that. Gathering her magic, she searched the corners of herself to pick up every scrap of it, knowing this spell was no small feat. She and Luce would be lucky if they didn’t pass out, let alone leave with skinned arms and a heart attack later. “You’re ready?”

Luce couldn’t help the way angry tears prickled at the corner of her eyes, helpless, unable to feel the flames that lived within her. This had to work, it had to fucking work. She needed it to work, she needed to save this person but… The words Adam had told her, when they’d posted up in the burnt out husk of a building on Scorch Street, they echoed in the back of her mind. Either I accept the dude in the mirror or I keep doing stuff that hurts everybody I care about. One of the most dude-bro things she’d heard from him, but it was true. She’d been mulling over their conversation for days now, trying to reconcile what he’d told her with the things she felt. And she’d thought… She’d thought she had this. She thought she could do this. But what if she was wrong? What if she couldn’t? What if he was wrong, what if Rio and Nell and Morgan—who had given her this second chance to change—had misplaced their faith? Her hands trembled slightly as she uncorked the bottle of ash, muttering a quiet Turkish chant over the still smoldering remains as she mixed it in. The Bloodroot followed and she mixed it all together with the pestle, the mixture crackling and sparking as she did her best to guide the magical properties of the ingredients into what she wanted, what she needed it to be. A cure. A way to end the nightmare. Redemption. Though her flames lay stubbornly still within her, Luce poured intention into the mixture until the chalice was full of a thick, smoking liquid.

Swallowing, Luce glanced up to see that Morgan and Rio had already drawn the wards, laid out the runes in their prescribed spaces around the large pyre. The bundles of herbs were smoking, filling the air with a heady scent, and all of them were waiting on… her. Luce felt Nell slip her hand into her own and she offered a nod. She wasn’t ready but she had to do this. She had to see this through. “Whatever it takes.” She said quietly as she stood up in the circle. Holding tightly onto her sister’s hand, the silver cup on the ground before them, Luce brought the walkie talkie to her mouth with her free hand. “Send him our way. We’re ready.” Now or never.

Leah ran and ran, waiting for the fuzzy confirmation that she could bring the phoenix to the clearing. She didn’t know how long they played cat and mouse, Leah switching back and forth between flame state to keep him occupied. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep this up. As she ran, exhaustion began to over take every part of her- her bones, her heart, her lungs- but she had to keep going. They had to help. And suddenly, when it felt that maybe she couldn’t go anymore, she heard the telltale buzz from Luce that they were ready, and without warning, she switched her path and began to run toward the clearing. The phoenix, in his effort to catch up with her, seemed to leave less of a trail of destruction than he had been in the last week or so, and she had to breath a sigh of relief at that.

It seemed like it took forever, but she finally broke through the clearing with the group of her friends, all ready and expectant to start the ritual that could end this. The phoenix seemed to pay them no mind. As they reached the center, she turned around and watched him stop and finally take in his surroundings. At least, that’s what she assumed he was doing- if he was even aware of what was going on. Regardless, with him distracted, Leah switched back into her flame state one last time, wrapping herself around the corrupted phoenix and engulfing him with her own flames. “We’re the same”, she whispered, hushed and smoky. “You’re not alone.”

Nell’s first reaction upon seeing Leah and the corrupted phoenix was one of ‘fight’, muscles tensing as she prepared to dodge a fireball that may or may not be coming her way, and dive in headlong to try and subdue the phoenix. But that’s not why they were here. They weren’t fighting today, they were cleansing, purifying— and violence could never truly grant either of those. Killing a problem wasn’t the same as healing from it, and wasn’t that obvious in the way her past choices seemed to never let her be? Maybe Luce should have asked Bea to help with the phoenix. Bea could be warm in the way the flip side of fire was meant to be, she’d know how to burn out the bad without incinerating the whole. Sure— Nell knew her plants and practical magic, but what good were those when she was home to an unsteady heart? If her intentions wavered, if she didn’t focus on the right things...would the phoenix simply rise to an even bigger and angrier inferno than it was now?

Thankfully Nell’s sister by her side, and Leah’s embrace of the other phoenix served as a reminder that she wasn’t all sharp edges and bloody hands. She had a family. And even though a bulk of it had left in the form of the coven, friends that had needed to find their own way beyond the town lines of White Crest, and even Bex who had fled in a fear Nell was still struggling to process— she could see her family reflected in the faces present. Luce by blood, Morgan by choice, Leah by upbringing, even Rio at times with the way he was ready and willing to help anyone who so much as glanced in his direction. Surely anyone who had a family was worth something? To have people who loved you was no easy feat. Did the phoenix have people that had loved him before? Leah loved him even now as he tried to burn the world to ash, caught in between her arms. Maybe there was another choice that could be made. As cliche as it may be, love was a cleanser, a healer, a purifier. And Nell knew how to do that even if she wasn’t always adept at it. That would be her focus point for the spell.

With a smattering of her own Turkish words Nell fueled the wards to life, letting her magic blaze through them so that the area was safely contained. Nowadays, she most often used Latin for her spellcasting, skipping the extra step of translation when she could. But if this were to be a spell of love she’d used the tongue her sister had used, the one her father had told stories in. Taking Luce’s other hand in her own, she placed their joined hands on the outside of the chalice, folding her palms over Luce’s while they cradled the silver between them. Leah had said it best, and she borrowed the words from the phoenix to lend to Luce, the soft Tukish private between them while she let her magic and intentions flow. “We’re the same.” They’d both been lost. Both desperately trying to claw their way out of the prisons they’d made for themselves out of their past deeds. But maybe with this, with the cleansing of the phoenix- at least Luce could be found. It was hard to remember that there were hands waiting on the other side of one’s self-made bars, people simply waiting for you to reach out and hold on tight. Nell wasn’t sure which of them was raising the other from perdition anymore, but she knew it was as one. “You’re not alone.”

The phoenix looked even worse than the first time Luce and Adam had seen them. Him, she realized. The phoenix was a man wreathed in brilliant, unnatural flames that seemed to flare around him in a malevolent glow. He stared at the clearing-- perhaps a moment of recognition for a place he’d already brought ruin upon, perhaps trying to puzzle out what the ritual space was for. Either way, Leah took advantage of the distraction and, cloaked in her own flames, she held onto him tightly. Her brilliant flames clashed against the ominous vermillion fire that surrounded the other phoenix. Luce felt Nell’s fingers tighten around her own and together they picked up the chalice, the magic coursing between them.

Luce could feel the wards glow, the paper Rio had drawn them on smoldering away to nothing until the burning runes were etched into the earth. And as Nell’s magic funneled into the chalice, Luce nearly let out a gasp as… the embers within her began to stir. The flames were weak, nonexistent. But the connection, the magic, it was there. For the first time in six months, she could feel the magic that had forsaken her. She reached for it cautiously, her spirit fanning the flame as carefully as she could to try and coax the spark back to life. “We’re the same.” Luce echoed as she stared at the phoenix held by Leah’s flames. She could see the fear in his eyes, the fear that was seared into his soul. As he strained against Leah, she knew she had been right. He wasn’t afraid of them, but of himself.

“You’re not alone.” Luce said, her voice rising as she let the magic flow through her fingertips into the chalice. The mixture continued to smoke and smolder and she knew that fire should be burning from the cup. But the flames wouldn’t come. No matter how hard she tried. “You’re not alone! We just want to help. Please, let us help you!” She called to the phoenix. Take our help, let me help, do what I never did, please.

Pain ran through Bernard’s body as the flames that weren’t his own burned around him-- frustration, rage, fear, they mixed together within him, the only thing he’d known for the past… how long? How long had he been like this? Days? Weeks? Months? He didn’t know. He didn’t know anything. He remembered erupting from the earth, tearing away from that cursed echoing place as fast as he could. It was a blur of fire and flames and pain and blood. And the voice, the voice, it followed him everywhere he ran. Whispering sometimes, shouting at others. All it wanted was for the world to burn. And he was powerless to it. People, animals, all who were caught in his path, they… crumbled to nothing. And all he could do was shriek in agony as his own cursed flames continued to burn. He couldn’t stop them, was powerless to the darkness that ran rampant within his body. The voice that wasn’t his own rang in his mind through all hours of the day, screaming at him to burn this place to the ground. It was the voice he’d fled from when he’d first awoken in this new body, the voice that still chased him.

And even now, it was shrieking at him. Burn the girl, burn them all, cast their bones to ash, let the flames consume this town. Let all become fire, let all become ruin.

But, a different voice-- the first voice he’d heard that wasn’t a strangled scream-- it made its way to his ear. “We’re the same.” A soft voice, whispering, pleading, “You’re not alone.” Fighting every instinct in his body, Bernard was able to tilt his head in the barest of nods. He did his best to regain control over the fire that raged around his body, to fight the voice within him. “Help me, help me.” He whispered to the woman whose arms were wrapped around him, “End-- end this.”

As the man struggled and strained against Leah’s hold, it began to feel hopeless. Already exhausted from their run through the forest, she knew she couldn’t hold onto him for much longer. And with no one else there able to withstand the flames, she wondered, briefly, if it had been a mistake for Luce to ask her for help, at least with this part. She was never strong- always swift and agile and smart. Perhaps Alfie would have been better for something like this. But then, he seemed to respond. A hint of a nod was all it took for Leah to gain her confidence back. This was working, and they were going to fix this. Together. She was not alone. Carefully, she unwrapped her arms around his body, instead, choosing to hold his forearms for guidance. Gently, she guided him onto the pyre. Though he still seemed to struggle, it was a lot easier to guide him up than it had been to hold him in place. She wondered if he was fighting too, now. Somewhere deep inside. She noticed the chalice shared between Nell and Luce, smoking and smoldering and beckoning to help. “I know it’s hard”, she said again, more firm this time. “But we think this will fix it. You have to try and drink this, okay? Drinking it will help. We’re going to help you get better, but first you have to drink it.” She continued to whisper these affirmations in his ear, willing him to continue to fight through the flames. “We’re all here to help you.”

Nell could feel the moment her sister’s magic sputtered into existence. She’d be able to recognize her sister’s magic anywhere. Such was the bond of countless spells done as one in their youth, and the few they’d done together in the last year and a half. It felt like someone waving her home from the front porch, far more comforting than something as tangible as physical touch could ever achieve. This was the two of them truly coming together as one for the sake of another. For the sake of her sister. For the sake of the phoenix in Leah’s arms. “We’re gonna make it,” Nell told Luce, giving her the words she too needed to hear the most. There was an end, and they’d found it. They were so close. So close to that win. So close to doing something good. Just let the past die, and then Luce could be free.

Luce watched as the phoenix allowed himself to be brought towards the pyre she’d built in the center of the glowing runes. His flames licked at the wood, straining to ignite the wooden structure. She could feel the heat of it from here-- she couldn’t let Nell get any closer, not when the flames were this hot. Nell didn’t have the same resilience she did. “We’re gonna do this. But I’m not letting you get hurt.” Luce said. “Step back, Nellie, please.I wouldn’t have been able to do this without you-- without any of you,” She said looking to Rio, to Morgan, even to Leah. “But I’ve gotta do this.” With that, she pulled the chalice gently from Nell’s hands, and followed Leah and the phoenix up the pyre. And as the phoenix’s cursed flames began to consume the wood, Luce took a deep breath and followed.

“Leah, you should back up. I don’t know what the wards might do if there are two phoenixes here.” Luce said as she held the chalice up, hands shaking slightly. The silver cup was still smoking, but she could feel the energy thrumming inside her. She could feel her magic lying in wait, but for what? She was trying so hard, the need to draw upon the magic was almost overwhelming. The flames were searing, painful in a way that fire had never felt for her. Not since she was a child, before she’d fully gained control of her magic. Luce swallowed as she stood next to the phoenix and, as she lifted the silver cup to his mouth, she saw him for the first time. Dark black eyes stared at her in desperation, the irises ringed in glowing red flames like the sun during an eclipse. Those eyes stared at her, consumed by fear and anguish and then-- a flicker, something dark flashed over his face. A tongue of flame shot from the phoenix’s body and curled around her left arm and Luce let out a scream of pain as the fire sizzled against her flesh. Agony shot up through her and her grip on the chalice loosened as she stumbled backwards, the flame retreating back to the phoenix’s body.

“We’re going to help you.” Luce panted, her fingers wrapping around the cup once more. “You’re not alone. This isn’t you and this,” She gasped in pain, the searing sensation still present within her, “This isn’t the end. You’re not alone.” Luce said. As she spoke, the burning heat grew within her. And that was when it hit her. The warmth was familiar. “Benim alevlerim.” She breathed and watched as the chalice blossomed with blue flames. “Drink. Please, drink.” Luce said and pressed the cup against the phoenix’s lips, tipping it back before staggering down the burning pyre. She retreated to where the others stood safely at the edge of the wards to wait and to watch.

Bernard drank. And for a moment, nothing changed. These people they’d tried, they’d failed. And he would be-- his eyes flicked open as the pain mounted to new, unimaginable heights. It felt as though he’d swallowed the sun, that the light was burning him from the inside out. The voice that had shouted at him, it was screaming again. But now, it screamed in pain, agony, as the sun continued to burn. His mouth opened to scream but all that escaped was a plume of blue flame. Instinctively, he shut his mouth and curled in on himself, hugging his burning body. Meanwhile, the blue flames crawling over his skin, over the pyre, overwhelming the cursed red flames. For a long moment, pain was all that filled Bernard’s mind. And then, there was nothing at all.

Things seemed to be going to plan. At least, Orion hoped that they were. None of the actual spell experts seemed to be freaking out, so Rio had mostly taken that as a good sign and held back. He silently observed, a worried line drawn across his face. The concern only grew as the Leah showed up with the Phoenix. Up until now, everything that Rio had witnessed had just been preparation. With the phoenix here, the true spell began. He stood just on the edge of the wards they had constructed, nervously fiddling with his fingers to keep himself still. But he couldn’t take his eyes off of Luce and the phoenix. Even from back here, Rio could feel the rise in temperature associated with the phoenixes flames. He pressed against his skin, warning of the heat. How could Luce handle being that close to it? His entire body tensed as the flame surged towards Luce. He almost jolted forward, but stopped himself at the last second. She was trying to get away. He needed to trust that Luce knew better for this than he did and let her do what needed to be done.Flames seemed to be consuming him, a bright, glowing red that made Rio clench at his heart. It looked so incredibly painful. “Oh my god.” He muttered, mostly to himself. If tears poured down Rio’s face he did nothing to stop them, he could only stare at the scene as the man screamed, only for blue flames to erupt. That blue soon took over the red, covering every inch of the man and becoming too bright for Rio to stare at any longer. He covered his eyes, glancing away from the scene in fear that he would go blind completely.

Luce was right, and Leah stepped out of the circle, toward Rio and Morgan. She switched out of her flame state in the process, and found a safe space behind her friends while still holding a good view of the action at the pyre. She couldn’t take her eyes off of everything that was going on, not even if she tried. She could see the pain inside the phoenix, almost as if she were sensing it within her heart. His flames, red and unnatural, looked like an illness that needed to be cured. How she wished she could run back in and hold him again. The flames seemed never ending but not at all stable; all encompassing but not all warm. And with the eruption of more and more of them, Leah was worried if too much damage had already been done. She couldn’t look away, but her heart was begging her to.

For a while, it seemed as though the fire would never end. It looked as though the flames would continue to spiral and battle against one another, locked in a continuous battle until the pyre that fueled the blaze crumpled to ash. But, Luce watched as her blue flames over took the phoenix’s own iridescent fire and then… She let out a gasp as the man sank to his knees and then crumpled to the ground. The fire continued to rage around him, consuming the wooden pyre. Meanwhile, the runes that formed the wards continued to glow, the lines brilliant and blue. Just the same shade as her flames. And then, almost as quickly as it had started-- the flames burnt out. In their place was nothing but a pile of ash.

Blinking in the sudden darkness, Luce held up her uninjured hand and reached tentatively for the magic. But her fears were unfounded, as vibrant blue flame jumped to the palm of her hand. “Is he… Do you think he’s alright?” She asked the others, voice hoarse from the smoke she’d inhaled.

There was little Nell could do as she watched her sister dive into the flames along with the phoenix, and she couldn’t help the protective step she made towards the center of the circle while the fire sizzled around Luce’s arm. It wasn’t unheard of for the Vurals to throw themselves into the center of an inferno for their sisters, but the more rational voice in her head quelled the emotional response, reminding her that she wouldn’t so much as get within a few feet of Luce before burning to a crisp. And what help would that be? Nell would be incinerated, the wards would fall, and Luce and the phoenix would be worse off than when this had started. Nell filled her now empty hand with Leah’s no longer flaming one, the familiar warmth of a fire being granting her another form of comfort.

The wards stayed strong as Nell kept the flow of her magic constant, using her worry of Luce to fuel the glowing runes. After all, that stemmed from love as well, and thus it would rightly serve the spell. Finally the flames subsided, and Nell was free to move forwards after watching the phoenix fall to ash on the ground. Just as any phoenix would at the end of their lifecycle. It had killed him? This was the cleansing that he’d needed? Death? Surely there were less permanent ways to purify? But death was anything but permanent for a phoenix. Or at least...it was meant to be. They hadn’t actually killed him, had they? “I…” This couldn’t be the result of all their efforts— all of Luce’s efforts. She’d needed to do something good, something that helped the phoenix, not end its cycle. “Wait- I think- is it moving?” Or had it only been her hopeful eye that thought she spotted a sign of life beneath the gray?

While the explosion of bright blue and radioactive red flames was all encompassing, the silence and emptiness that followed their burnout was even more-so. Leah looked between her friends, first to Nell, who’s hand she gave a tight squeeze back, then to Rio and Morgan, and finally to Luce. Luce, who had worked so hard to save the phoenix- ...she didn’t want to disappoint her. But in Leah’s experience, a pile of ash only meant one thing. She looked down at what was left of the phoenix, his ashes still and unmoving. Perhaps this was what was meant to happen all along. The ritual was meant to get rid of the illness- did it presume that the only way to rid one of corruption was through… death? It seemed too morbid. Too unfair. Tears filled her eyes as she looked back to Luce, ready to break the news to her. It wouldn’t be fair to get her hopes up if there was none to have. “I think...he might be d-”, but she stopped, interrupted by Nell’s observation. Her eyes shot back to the pile of ashes, sensing the tiniest pile of movement for herself. “Wait, -what?”

The scent of ash filled Bernard’s lungs as he shifted among the dust and debris. His fingers curled around the fine grains of dust and he began to crawl out from under the pile, his head emerging. He was covered in soot, his body ached, and he felt so, so cold. But, the world was blissfully, wonderfully silent. His mind was silent. The voice that had echoed in his head had been burned clean and now… Now he was whole again. Exhaustion and relief washed over him in equal measure and Bernard was able to lift his head up for a brief moment to take in the small cluster of people staring at him. He offered a weak smile before his eyes rolled back up into his head and he collapsed, unconscious once more.

Morgan had watched the proceedings in petrified silence. She understood how badly Luce needed this and as she huddled closer between Leah and Rio, she started to accept that she might need this too. There was so much suffering on this miserable rock of a planet and so much that couldn’t be helped no matter how much money or good vibes you threw out there. But maybe this could be different. Maybe this one witch and this one broken bird could do better for a little while. She stared at the clump of ash on the ground, bracing herself for the worst. “Leah, don’t…” she whispered. If this was another cosmic fuck you, Luce wouldn’t need to be told. And then he moved.

“Shit, Nell’s right. He’s moving, she’s right!” She grabbed Leah, squeezing tight and looked at Luce. Whatever she was holding against the witch didn’t matter just then. There was only relief and understanding. “Guess you’re better than you thought after all,” she said. “So, who’s helping to carry Mr. Firebird? I don’t think he’ll like his feet dragging on the ground if I lift him by myself.”

Seeing the shift in the pile of ashes finally let Orion take a breath of relief that seemed to be shared by everyone in the group. This hasn’t been in vain. It had been dangerous, and exhausting and at times even seemed a bit hopeless. But when the pile of ashes shifted and everyone’s gone shifted from solemn to overwhelming relief, it all seemed worth it. “Holy crap.” Rio breathed, too giddy to stay still. He bounced on his feet, still a bit apprehensive to move anywhere in case the spell wasn’t completely finished. But Morgan spoke first, suggesting they carry the man away from the spell site and back towards civilization. If she was confirming it, then that meant that it was done. “We really did it.” Rio spoke again aloud, not trying to hide the surprise. “You really did it.” He repeated, directed towards Luce this time. Maybe it had been a time effort, but she had gotten the ball rolling. And from the looks of it, she had paid a price. “I’ll help carry him. Someone should help Luce too.”

Time seemed to slow as Luce stared at the pile of ash, unblinking. Waiting. Had she killed someone else? Had all of her effort and time and energy and intention meant nothing? Had she taken another life, an innocent life? An eternity stretched on as she stared at the pile. And then. Relief. Luce felt her legs buckle as the man lifted his head from the ashes and stared at them, his face illuminated in the glowing flames that rose from her hand. Normal eyes, no longer ringed in fire. Her blue flames sputtered and went out as Luce sank to the ground next to Nell, her hand still clutched in her sisters. She let out a shaking, shuddering breath as she sat on the ground. They’d done it. The ritual had worked. He was okay. And somehow, in the midst of it all, her magic was back.

“Holy shit. We did it.” She breathed as she glanced up at the others. “Thank you… All of you guys. This wouldn’t… None of it could have happened without you. Thank you.” She murmured. Her entire body ached, she felt absolutely drained, and her arm was filled with a burning pain she hadn’t felt since she was a little girl, but none of it mattered right now. She’d done it. They’d done it.

#p: afta #wickedswriting #chatzy #p: leah ramirez #p: nell vural #p: morgan beck #p: orion quinn

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firstginger · 3 years

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Hey there it’s me again :) 💕I think I forgot to put the hearts I said I was on one of the posts so hopefully it was recognized haha. I found a few more forms from the infj list that fit! Saint Bernard (except that I am not super communicative but with closer people yes), Clumber spaniel, whippet (except I am not super active but I try haha), rock ringtail possum (except paranoid), and spiny dormouse (except I am not a perfectionist all the time). I hope this helps! Can’t wait to see the result!

hey!! i've been digging through daemon forms and i have a few options based on which ones you thought fit and how you describe yourself. first the ones that don't seem to fit as much:

- i don't think you're a small rodent soul, you don't sound high energy, high anxiety, and hardworking/competitive enough. there are some exception forms, but overall these people are going to be very attentive towards hierarchies and where they stand, to have an anxious streak and plan ahead, and get very obsessive in their activities.

- you don't sound like a rabbit either, which is also going to have the high anxiety, high work ethic, and the sense of walking on eggshells with how observant they are.

so that being said, here's what i think might fit the best!

the lemur-like ringtail possum (or lemuroid ringtail possum) has two forms: the typical brown with cream underbelly form, and a rarer white form. my hangup is that these guys might be a little too comfort-seeking and low energy for you, though as a modern human it's difficult to avoid hard work and sudden change in our lives, so i would consider whether you have a drive to work hard or if you do it to maintain stability or for other people, and whether you'd prefer to stick to your routine and get stressed by change. otherwise the lemur-like ringtail possum fits your social criteria by be rather avoidant to strangers, but extremely loyal and attached to their loved ones. they value a sense of peace and stability, especially when it comes to maintaining their close bonds with others and they're very willing to cooperate. they're less independent and value social support. they work the best when they have very clear guidelines and accomplish tasks when they don't have too much going on at once as they get overwhelmed and stressed easily, but they're also highly dutiful and don't like letting others down.

the chartreux and the havana brown are two cat breeds that tend to be more reserved. before you investigate these, consider whether a domestic cat form is right for you. people with domestic cat daemons are absolutely more independent and private and value that sense of control in their lives. they're also exceptionally observant and intuitive. they are defensive if provoked and will stand up for their boundaries, but ultimately they're very conflict-avoidant people and want a sense of calm and stability. as a domestic species, all of these forms are going to be communicative, even if it's just with their loved ones. they're also particular and don't prefer change, but their sense of adaptability and curiosity helps them roll with the punches if need be.

if that sounds like you, definitely consider either of these breeds, or the russian blue is also fitting (it's one of the three domestic cat analyses that TDF has up so it gets selected a lot -- just wanted to give you some variety!). the chartreux is very even-tempered and gentle, but maintains a private inner world and only shares their feelings with those who have earned their trust. they have a strong sense of imagination and prefer to work alone and stay within their own head. the havana brown is more lively, very shrewd and intelligent and driven by curiosity. they cultivate a tight knit group of friends they enjoy being around and are openly affectionate, though they enjoy indulging their own creativity and love to understand how things work.

the clumber spaniel and whippet are two more reserved, lower energy dog breeds again before you investigate these, consider whether a domestic dog form is right for you. people with domestic dog forms are highly security-seeking, empathetic, and close-bonding. they do well with change so long as they have a sense of social support and stability throughout it. they're extremely loyal individuals who naturally support and give to their loved ones. they tend to suffer from insecurity when alone, though some breeds express this through anxiety and sensitivity, while others will become more assertive and defensive. overall they're less guarded towards strangers like the above forms are.

if that sounds like you, these two breeds are a great place to start. you've already looked at the clumber spaniel, who is very calm and easy-going in all situations and extremely tolerant of others. they really blossom when they're around their loved ones and have a playful and excitable streak when they're socially comfortable. they do have a good work ethic because of their strong sense of duty and will push through things until they're complete, but like the possum get overwhelmed when too much is on their plate. they're pretty sensitive and struggle to hide it as they naturally wear their heart on their sleeve. for the whippet, don't consider energy to necessarily mean running around. this form is actually pretty low energy most of the time, but they come alive when something interests them and get extremely motivated and excitable. they're very intelligent people who put their all into things when inspired, definitely more driven than the clumber spaniel. their sociability is more reserved and they're very shy and withdrawn in social situations, but they're also conflict-avoidant and sensitive so will tend to go with the flow. they get overwhelmed easily as well and really value an environment where they can feel like themselves and pursue what they love without any pressure.

hope this helps!!

#personal #daemonism #form finding #tdf

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vannahfanfics · 3 years

Text

Hey there, @madeofsaltiness! Here is your second match-up, this time for Haikyuu!! Once again, I’m very appreciative that you commissioned me, and I hope you’ve enjoyed them!

I match you with...

Kōtarō Bokuto!

That’s right, this is the man for you! This gentle giant loves you to the ends of the earth and thinks that you’re the most adorable girl on the planet. He thinks it’s so adorable how shy you are at first, but loves it even more when you open up to him and become a ball of enthusiasm just like him! He loves it when you give him advice; he always listens, even sometimes too enthusiastically... However, he knows that sometimes you can be so stubborn that you don’t practice what you preach, so sometimes he has to wrap you up in a bear hug and tell you to stop and think for a minute. Is it just an excuse to cuddle you? Probably, but he does worry, too!

Kōtarō loves to laugh, so he definitely appreciates that you have a sense of humor. He’s an optimist that borders on overconfident, so he likes that you look on the bright side and make the best of situations, too! He thinks you’re a bundle of fun, so he loves to take you out to clubs and parties so you can have a good time! Though Kōtarō is a full-on extrovert, he knows that sometimes you just don’t have the energy. Don’t be afraid to tell him you’re not feeling it! If you don’t want to go out, he is 100% okay with snuggling up with you for a night of movies or videogames, too! As long as he’s with you, this big guy is completely happy!

Kōtarō also loves animals, especially dogs! His favorite are big, poofy, energetic dogs. He loves to wrestle around on the floor or in the grass with his pupper, and is very enthusiastic about training it to fetch. He likes taking the dog to the dog park too to socialize, but it’s more just so Kōtarō can go around petting every pooch in sight.

Kōtarō loves that you dance! He thinks it’s soooooo sexy! He loves to dance with you, too, even though he’s not nearly as skilled as you are. He likes it when you choreograph routines for you guys to do together; he gets so into it, and even though his movements are a bit more fumbly and uncoordinated, he has a blast! He loves to just sit back and watch you dance sometimes, too. He just thinks it’s the sexiest thing on the planet, and as soon as you’re done dancing, he just can’t help grabbing you by the hips and kissing you all over because it just makes him realize how damn amazing you are!

He also thinks it’s really fun how many languages you know. He wants you to teach him and is an avid and quick learner. He even goes out of his way to find new languages for you guys to learn together. He thinks it’s a great way to spend time with you, and it can be useful down the road.

Kōtarō is a big boy and big boys gotta eat, so this mans is a real foodie. He loves to go find the weirdest things possible to eat, so therefore, he loves to travel. You don’t even have to give him money; if it’s weird, outlandish, or even a little bit disgusting, Kōtarō is gonna try to eat it just to say he did. It makes food outings really fun and memorable, though!

Though Kōtarō seems like a dense airhead, he can actually get pretty thoughtful when he wants to. He loves to snuggle up with you in the bed or under the stars and have deep conversations into the night. Oftentimes these turn into silly hypotheticals and debates, given that both of you are fun-loving people, but sometimes you get a peek of just how philosophical Kōtarō can be.

I’m really enthusiastic about how much Kōtarō loves food, so I thought that some headcanons on one of your food adventures would be fun!:

You and Kōtarō often go meandering downtown in search of street food and dives to go try some new food. You walk hand-in-hand down the small streets and sidewalks, discussing what you’re in the mood for.

It really doesn’t matter, though, because as soon as Kōtarō sees something that interests him, he’s zooming off with you in tow. He’s targeted a new street vendor, so it seems the decision for dinner has been made regardless of any input you may offer.

He plunks down at the counter, practically bristling with excitement as he drinks in the oden steaming in vats of broth in silver trays. You’d never had oden before, since it wasn’t sold in these parts, so you had to admit that you were excited to try it. You sit down beside Kōtarō, studying the selection while making small talk with the vendor.

It ended up being a good decision. The various oden were steeped in rich broth that saturated them with flavor, making you hum with delight at every bite. Kōtarō was inhaling the oden like a ravenous beast; you almost felt bad, knowing that your boyfriend was going to devour the vendor’s entire stock. Your wallet already felt lighter.

However, that didn’t matter. The smile on Kōtarō’s face was simply radiant, and praise tumbled from his mouth, enough to make the vendor begin to blush. You loved seeing him this happy, so it didn’t matter how much it cost.

Like usual, though, Kōtarō overdoes it. He’s nursing a distended belly and practically waddling down the street whence you came, bellyaching about his bellyache. He nuzzles into you, seeking your touch to soothe the pain, and you can’t help but joke about what a baby he is. Still, he’s your baby.

Again, Kōtarō loves big, floofy dogs. I thought I would elaborate on that with a cute little scenario, specifically about a trip to the dog park:

You don’t know who’s bounding faster, your St. Bernard or Kōtarō, as you walk through the gate of the dog park. Your dog immediately zooms into the grass, falling onto his back to begin rolling around in the dewy, pleasantly-smelling blades. His fluffy fur drifts on the breeze, even though you’d brushed him before you left. Kōtarō flops onto the dog’s belly to boop its nose with his own, then ravage its belly with enthusiastic pets and scratches.

Sometimes, you wondered if Kōtarō was nothing more than a big, silly dog in human form.

His eyes are bright when he turns to you, and it didn’t take much of your imagination to envision him crowned with big floppy ears and a thick, wagging tail. You smile as you crouch down to pet your dog’s head, watching his big pink tongue loll happily and douse his fur in drool.

“Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?” Kōtarō babbled as he swept his large hands around the dog’s furry belly in wide circles. The dog barked in response, loud and booming, that attracted the attention of nearby pets and owners alike. You laughed, always charmed by Kōtarō’s enthusiasm for your shared pet. They really were on the same wavelength, and there was so much love between them.

“All right, boy. You wanna fetch?” Kōtarō asked while he stood, pulling a tennis ball out of his hoodie pocket. The dog rolled onto his belly, barking again, and Kōtarō wasted no time in hurling the ball as far as he could. It sailed across the park to land near the fence. With speed almost surprising for such a hulky body, your dog took off for the ball. While you waited for him to retrieve it, you sidled up to your boyfriend and hugged his waist.

“What is it, babe?” he asked, still watching your dog with a smile, but he dropped a kiss into your hair.

“Sometimes I think you love him more than me,” you joked. He looked at you with raised eyebrows, and then a cute smile graced his lips.

“Hahhhh? I could never! First of all, he’s not a good kisser,” he joked back. You tipped your head back in laughter. Indeed, they were more tongue baths than kisses that left Kōtarō’s face shining with drool and his hair sticking up in odd places. The dog trotted back up to their feet and plopped the ball down at their feet, then ran off to go bother a Doberman.

Kōtarō wound his arms around you and hugged you close, showering you in kisses.

“You’ll always be my number one, baby. That’s a fact <3″

Interested in a commission? Check out this post!

#vannahfanfics commissions #vannahfanfics matchups #matchups #commissions

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bedbellyandbeyond · 4 years

Photo

Medical Help

(Story Post; New Character!)

The building was rather unassuming at first. It appeared to be similar to the government building Theo worked out of, but a little bigger. Henderson used his ID to get them inside and then took him to the elevator. There were a lot of buttons inside which surprised Theo since the place was only a few stories high. After a moment he realised that the numbers on the bottom three quarters of the panel were all basement floors. Henderson selected one and they were on their way down quickly. The unexpected drop made Theo hold his stomach in shock. It felt like a lot of fluid sloshed around and it threw off his balance a bit that he had to grab Henderson for support. When the doors opened up, they were in a room that looked like any other reception at a small hospital or private practice. There was only one person in the waiting area minding their own business and they looked completely human. At the front desk, Theo saw what appeared to be the most beautiful human being he’d ever seen. Köbi smiled at them. “Hi there. Can I get your name, please?”

“Henderson Neil, but I brought my friend to be looked at,” Henderson said. “Do you have an appointment?” Köbi asked Theo. “No, but I'm looking for a second opinion on something and Henderson suggested I come here,” Theo said. “Oh, um... We don't usually take walk-ins I think... Lemme ask the doctor.” Köbi picked up the phone and called the doctor through the intercom. When it was picked up, he talked softly. “Hey, Syd. We have a walk-in here... They're with an employee... Okay, thank you.” “So?” Henderson probed. “You're in luck,” Köbi said. “We just had a no show, so the doctor has some time for you before the next patient. In the future though, we are very busy so you will have to make an appointment.” “Thanks a lot,” Henderson said. “Can I leave my buddy here in your hands? I gotta make a class.” Köbi nodded. “Mmhm. Can I get your name, buddy?” “It's Theo. Théodore Bernard.” Köbi typed it into his computer. “Ah, you're in the system. That's convenient for me...” “I'm sorry, I'm in the system?” “Yes, you're a government employee, right?” Köbi stated. “Even if you don't work directly with this department, APID has records of all government employees. It's a security thing.” “Oh... Okay, I see.” The doctor appeared from down the hall and placed a file folder at the front desk. “Köbi, I'm going to need you to input these while I'm with this patient, please.” “Sure thing.” Köbi took the file and placed it beside his computer. “This is Théo. He's your walk in.” Theo was a little surprised that Köbi actually pronounced his name the proper French way, but then again, he did have some kind of European accent. While he liked that, it was a little weird because he hadn’t heard it like that in months. “Hello, Théodore. I am Dr. Sydryn Aias. Please follow me,” Sydryn said, turning and heading back down the hall. The full name drop was a little weirder to hear. Usually only his aunt called him Théodore. “Oh, um...” Theo started following them. “Hi, doctor. Uh, I don't do it often, but last time I did a walk in, I had to fill out a form...” “Yes, yes. Information on your medical concern so that we can determine the level of urgency. No need,” Sydryn said bringing him to their office. “You can just tell me, although I imagine from the way your clothes don't fit that it has to do with sudden unanticipated growth in the mid-section.” “Y-Yeah!” Theo was a bit impressed. He located the exam table and got himself up onto it. “My doctor didn't really seem to think much of it, but I swear, when I woke up this morning, I just had a few rolls. Now it's like a beach ball.” “Théo, your gender, please,” Sydryn asked. “Oh, I'm a man,” Theo answered, though a little caught of guard. “He/Him. But it sounds like you guessed that I'm trans.” “Not necessarily, but it is relevant to the questioning,” Sydryn stated. “So, I imagine your GP ruled out pregnancy.” Theo nodded. “He did an ultrasound. It showed nothing more than fluid.” “Fluid?” Sydryn started typing on their computer. “In what part? Stomach? Liver? Intestine? Uterus? Kidney?” “He didn't say but I imagine it was just in the general...space of my stomach,” Theo said. “I dunno.” “You ‘dunno' is right... Do you have copies of this ultrasound?” Sydryn asked. “No, sorry.” “Fine... We'll have to do another.” Sydryn got up from their computer. “I recommend a trans-vaginal ultrasound but I won't do it if you're not comfortable with that, considering I am new to you.” Theo flushed. “Trans-vaginal...” He rubbed his forehead. “Honestly, I just want to know what's wrong with me, so whatever... Let's do it.” “Good. Do you have any ongoing medical conditions that may cause you pain in your pelvic region?” Sydryn asked. “No.” Theo shook his head. “Are you menstruating?” “Nope.” “Have you ever had a trans-vaginal ultrasound before?” “No. Does it hurt?” Sydryn shook their head. “It shouldn’t hurt, however some find it uncomfortable. The tool used is called a probe. It's about two centimetres in diameter and it is placed inside a condom and lubricated to ease passage into the vagina.” Theo chuckled uncomfortably. “You could've taken me to dinner first...” “It's better that you haven't eaten yet so that we can rule out any meals as an effect on your condition,” Sydryn replied. “Have you eaten recently?” “Not since lunch...” Theo said, a bit more uncomfortable since the doctor didn't share in his joke. “Good.” Sydryn got up and retrieved a patient gown for Theo. “Please put this on.” They pulled the curtain closed that encircled the exam table to allow Theo some privacy. Theo did as told, nervously undressing and pulling on the gown. The doctor had picked out a decently large one, so his middle didn't pull too much on the thin material. When he was done, he pulled back the curtain. Sydryn had stepped out for a moment but came back into the room when they heard the curtain. “Follow me, please.” Theo nodded and followed the doctor to another room where the imaging equipment was set up. He was directed up onto another exam bed and he reclined, resting his hands on his stomach. “Please rest your feet up on these platforms here and here,” Sydryn said, pointing to the pedal like appendages of the bed. Theo spread his legs as he did as told. He watched as the doctor prepared a very long probe and lubricated it. He tensed up instinctively as the probe was brought near his nether regions. “Theodore, please relax,” Sydryn said. “Have you had a pap smear before?” “Yeah.” “The pressure should be similar. Some would say this is easier,” Sydryn said. “Should you feel any pain however, do tell me.” “Okay.” Theo tried to breathe deep and relax himself. The probe was inserted moments later. The doctor looked to the monitor for information. For the next few minutes, they turned the transducer slowly, stopping occasionally to study the image. Theo didn’t really know what to look at so he just waited for it to be over. When it was, Sydryn removed the probe and set it aside to be cleaned later. “So?” Theo asked, putting his legs together. “Did it show anything?” Sydryn sighed. “It's inconclusive. However, it is clear that you have a large build-up of fluid within your uterus, much like with a pregnancy. There is an intact membrane like that of the amniotic sac, however there is no evidence of a foetus within. The question now is, what is this fluid build up and what caused it.” “So what do we do?” Theo asked. “I have this balloon of liquid in my uterus and what? Do I hope it goes away?” Sydryn shook their head. “No. I suggest we pop it.” Theo tensed at the thought. “Uh, what?” “If we, quote, break your water, unquote, we can, a., reduce the distension of your stomach, and b., collect some of the fluid as a sample and study it to determine its origin,” Sydryn explained. Theo rubbed his stomach. “...Oh... Do you think it's safe to do that?” Sydryn nodded. “Yes, it's like you're giving birth to an imaginary baby, but without a lot of the pain and stretching.” Theo swallowed hard. “If it'll make this stomach go away, then I guess let's do it...” Sydryn went to wash their hands and get new gloves. They called in Köbi from the front desk to assist and he got the tools ready. As Köbi was placing a plastic basin underneath the edge of the bed, Sydryn had Theo put his feet back up on the stirrups. “Now, is this going to hurt at all?” Theo asked. “It's not likely to hurt so much as give relief,” Sydryn said holding up what looked to be a hook on a stick. “It might feel like you're urinating but from a different hole.” “Alright...” The hook was inserted inside and Theo tried to relax again. After a moment inside, he felt a sudden popping sensation and then the rush of fluid out of his uterus and out between his legs. It was incredibly satisfying and he even noticed his stomach visibly deflate. “...Well, that's new,” he heard the doctor say. “What?” Theo asked. “Is something weird?” He sat up to try and see what the doctor was seeing. In the basin below the bed, a swirl of transparent but clearly blue and sparkly liquid pooled. Köbi had taken a sample in a beaker and left the room with it. “...Did that come out of me?” Theo asked, flabbergasted. “Indeed it did.” Sydryn pressed a little on Theo's stomach to coax the rest of the liquid out. When it seemed to have stopped, he gave Theo a towel and helped clean him up. “What is it?” Theo asked. “I can’t be sure,” Sydryn said. “We're going to run tests... For now though, I believe it's best you rest here overnight.” “What? But I have work—” “Your employer will be informed,” Sydryn said. “This is now an APID case and your health needs to be watched. This is a unique case, so we'll have to gather as much data as we can to determine the origin of this condition.” “...So I don't have a choice?” Theo asked. “Theo, the concern here is that we don't know what this might have done to you internally,” Sydryn said. “We don't know what affect it has on the human body beyond the distention. I can let you go home, but I believe it’s safest for you to remain here. If anything develops, we'd want you to have a medical professional nearby. It's up to you.” Theo rubbed the back of his neck. “Is this all covered by OHIP?” “A little late to ask that, and the answer is technically no, but there is no charge for diagnosis,” Sydryn stated. “Should we determine that there is non-human interference in you're health, which I am almost certain there is, then further care will be covered by our program.” “So... To be plain...?” Theo asked. “To be plain...If aliens or other non-human people are involved in this, a.k.a. this is not a human condition, you won't pay anything.” “And if there isn't?” “You won’t pay anything here, but you'll have to seek your usual human healthcare. Although I would suggest you find a new GP. Your current one is less than useful.” Theo nodded. “Okay, I understand...” “Do you have any questions?” “Yeah, well... Not exactly a question...” Theo looked at the doctor. “You say a lot of ‘human’ this, ‘non-human' that... Are you...human?” “It is not particularly polite around here to ask people whether they are human or not,” Sydryn answered. “Oh, I'm sorry...” “It's fine, it's your first time at APID. Please, have you chosen to stay as I requested?” “Well, where would I be staying?” Theo asked. “And I'm not really prepared for an overnight stay... I don’t have pyjamas or toiletries...” “I'll have the receptionist show you a room and he'll provide you any essentials you might need for the night,” Sydryn explained. “Let him know if you do plan on staying so that I am aware of the decision.” “Okay...” Theo got off the bed. “Should I go back and change?” “Please.”

After touring the overnight rooms they had, Theo agreed to stay. The rooms were much like a hotel and reasonably homely so he tried to treat it like a vacation. There was a set of buttons in the room near the bed, one of which he was he could use to call in a doctor or nurse to check in on him. He figured be might as well catch Henderson up so he texted him to call him when his class was over, and his friend kept the promise. Henderson sounded really excited about that idea that some alien had done this to Theo and he was rather proud that he'd called it. Theo reminded him that nothing was confirmed yet, but he was pretty sure Henderson was right as that liquid that had come out of him definitely looked otherworldly.

The next morning, Theo woke up groggy and delirious. It took him a minute to recognise where he was, then he sat up to get out of bed. It wasn't so easy as, once again, his stomach had swollen to unnatural proportions. He started to panic. What in the world was going on? Why was it back? They had drained him! It should've all left his body! Remembering the buttons, he picked the one to call the doctor. It was relatively early in the morning so he wasn’t sure if the doctor would be in, but sure enough, the pink haired physician was there within minutes. “It’s back,” Theo said, getting up and lifting his shirt. “What’s going on, doctor?” “Theodore, no need to reveal yourself,” Sydryn said. “I chose to prioritise looking into your case so I examined the substance we obtained yesterday and it is beyond what I’ve frankly ever seen. As such, I had to consult another doctor on the matter and I’d like them to speak with you.” Theo nodded, though he was starting to sweat a little. So far it seemed like no one knew what was happening to him and he just felt so lost. “Okay, um… So you don’t know anything?” “I know a lot of things, but this case in particular is new to me,” Sydryn said. “That doesn’t mean that I’m not trying to learn everything I can on the matter. I’d like to see you get through this.” That made him feel a little better. “Okay, who’s this other doctor?” Sydryn got up and went outside and returned with two others, one a handsome wavy-haired man with green tips and the other was none other than a Yulinian. Theo had never met a Yulinian, or any other alien for that matter, in his life and part of him was both very excited and another part was terribly nervous. He had no idea how to act and couldn’t help staring. “Théodore, this is Fay Demers and Dr. Ix,” Sydryn said. “Dr. Ix is our resident medical delegate from Yulin. They have been educating me on the physiology of various extraterrestrial species for the sake of my practice and I believe their knowledge on extraterrestrial life forms to be of benefit to you at this time.” Theo rubbed his legs nervously. “Hi, um, I’m Theo.” “It’s nice to meet you,” Dr. Ix said, smiling warmly. “I’m sure you’re feeling very worried for your health and I can assure you that this is the best place on this planet for you to receive the best care.” “Yeah, uh… Thanks.” Theo tried to look away, thinking he was making too much eye contact. “I’m really sorry if I act weird… I’ve just never met a Yulinian in person before.” “That’s quite alright,” the doctor said. “I get it a lot and frankly you’re one of the politer ones. Now, about your condition… I have a few questions.” “Okay, shoot.” “Have you been experiencing any strange dreams lately?” Dr. Ix asked. “Anything perhaps space related?” “Actually, yeah,” Theo said. “I have space dreams a lot.” “Can you describe them to me?” Dr. Ix pulled out a tablet to write on. “Yeah, um… Usually it’s the same dream from when I was younger,” Theo said. “I’m at a cottage with my friends, but I always breakaway to go look at the stars from the dock.” “How long have you been having this dream?” “I really don’t know. For as long as I can remember since that event.” “Has the dream changed at all within the last couple days?” “Yes! Actually, the night before last, I was on the dock but this time it was like…the night sky lifted me up into space,” Theo said. “And then it turned into a person with like, space hair. Galaxy hair.” Dr. Ix nodded silently, writing down some notes. Sydryn looked to the other doctor. “Does that line up?” “It does,” Dr. Ix said. “What does?” Theo asked. “You can diagnose me based on my dream?” Dr. Ix wobbled their head. “These types of ‘dreams’ are consistent with people we’ve found to share your condition. However, I also got to analyse the sample Dr. Aias procured and the two confirmed what I suspected you’re going through.” “So you know what’s wrong with me?” Theo asked, lighting up. “Yes,” Dr. Ix said. “I will say that not many beings go through what you are experiencing right now so our data is limited, but there is enough information that I believe we can help you with.” “So what is it? What’s wrong with me?” Dr. Ix crossed their hands over their tablet. “This appears to be a celestial pregnancy.” “Celestial what?” Theo placed his hands on his stomach. “I thought we determined I wasn’t pregnant…” “It was inconclusive,” Sydryn said. “What does it mean?” Theo asked. “Celestial pregnancy?” “You’ve been visited and impregnated by a celestial,” Dr. Ix said. “A celestial is a broad term for a number of extraterrestrial beings that do not inhabit planets but the space between them. Their existence and abilities are not easily explained by science, much like earthly creatures such as mermaids or dragons.” “Wait, hold on…” Theo said. “You’re comparing these celestial things to mythological creatures.” “I can assure you, they are not myths,” Sydryn stated. “The whereabouts and identities of such people are kept secret for their protection but they very much do exist.” “I for one am a merman,” Fay stated for the sake of proof. “Fay,” Sydryn warned. “You don’t know him…” “Relax, Syd. He’s clearly scared and harmless,” Fay stated. “Théo, I should probably explain why I’m here.” “You’re a merman?” Theo asked. Fay smiled and nodded. “Correct. I’m a case worker here at APID and Sydryn suggested I pick up your case.” “Fay here is one of our top case workers,” Sydryn stated. “He can help you with handling this condition on a more administrative and support level.” “Wait, hold on!” Theo said. “This is all a lot of information! I just want to know what we're going to do about this!” He patted his stomach. Dr. Ix nodded. “I'll continue. As I said, celestials are extraterrestrial beings. They do not belong to any one planet. Because of this, they are lesser known and often treated as mythological creatures. What we do know about some of them however is that on occasion they may visit a person in their sleep, often soothing them in pleasant dreams and they proceed to impregnate them with their celestial hybrid children. Implantation is certain and the, in your case, uterus swells with fluid to nurture the embryo as it grows.” “So you're saying...” Theo held his stomach. “This fluid builds up first? Then the baby grows inside it?” “Correct. You won't likely grow any larger than you are now, perhaps a bit more near the end of the pregnancy,” the doctor said. “From draining it yesterday, you only invited it to fill up again.” “Where is it coming from though?” Theo asked. “How can it fill up so fast?” “The fluid itself is...incredible to say the least. Exactly how it develops is hard to determine,” Dr. Ix said. “A microscopic examination showed that in fact, it contains micro-galaxies within. This is what feeds the offspring in the womb.” “I have...galaxies inside of me?” Theo asked. “Are you kidding?” “I don't kid,” Dr. Ix said. “I wouldn't concern yourself for the health of these galaxies. Something at such a small size is too delicate to worry about the condition of.” “I promise you; I'm not concerned about the health of micro-galaxies in my uterus,” Theo said, rubbing his head. “What do we do?” Dr. Ix placed a hand on Theo's shoulder. “We're going to monitor your pregnancy closely and make it as easy as possible for you. You'll get through this.” Theo shook his head. “But I don't want to be pregnant. I have no desire to have this kid. There has to be a way to get rid of it.” Sydryn shook their head. “Unfortunately, Théodore, the pregnancy is certain just as much as the implantation is. The will of a celestial is not one we can defy. This is why some cultures worship them as gods. We can help through the pregnancy, but we're not capable of terminating it. And I don’t mean it in the sense that we won’t or that we legally can’t. If we could, we would do so for you. There are no known methods for doing so.” Theo looked at all their faces, these people just staring at him. He knew they were there to help, but he couldn't help feeling despair. He started to tear up and tried wiping his eyes. “So...So I'm just stuck like this?” Fay came over to his side and rubbed his shoulder. “I know this is hard for you. This kind of thing is so uncommon and unheard of that it would make anyone scared. But you're not going to be alone through this and we're going to work out what we're going to do from here on. If it helps at all, think of it as being chosen by a higher power.” “On some planets,” Dr. Ix interjected, “These children are seen as blessings and become important pillars of their societies, oracles and shaman and so on. Their parents are treated like kings.” “Wait, am I expected to raise this thing?” Theo asked. “No, that is up to you,” Sydryn said. “You can take custody or APID will take them on as a ward. We wouldn't want to force you into parenthood against your will.” “But I have to give birth to it?” Theo inhaled sharply. “I... Guys, I can't process all this right now...” “Of course. It’s a lot,” Fay said. “It's not easy waking up to three strangers telling you a space alien impregnated you.” “Why don't you come with me,” Sydryn said, “And we'll do another examination just to determine your overall health today as well as get some measurements.” Theo nodded. “Okay.” “After you guys do that, I can get you some breakfast,” Fay said, patting Theo's arm. “What are you, an egg man? Bacon? Pancakes?” “Is there food here?” Theo asked. “Yes, of course. We have a lot of residents living here,” Fay said. “We have a really large cafeteria. But honestly, the food is really good.” “I wouldn't mind bacon and eggs,” Theo answered. “Thanks.” “Don't mention it,” Fay said. “Syd, can you send him to my office when you're done?” “Sure thing.” Sydryn motioned for everyone to leave the room. Theo called to them as Dr. Ix began to leave. “Sorry, um, I have another question.” “Yes?” Ix turned around. “How long will this pregnancy last?” “The few recorded celestial pregnancies lasted the length of a host species’ typical pregnancy so, it’ll likely be nine months,” Dr. Ix determined. “A whole nine months looking full term?” Theo paled. “No way.” Dr. Ix started to leave again. “I’ll be consulting on this with Dr. Aias. Should you wish to speak to me directly, you can come by my office. Dr. Aias can give you the location. I must go now however.” “Okay, bye…” The alien left behind Fay, and Sydryn was about to step out as well. “By the way, when Köbi had you fill out some forms last night, you put your aunt down as your emergency contact, correct?” Sydryn asked. “Yeah, why?” “Well, it's just that the address is a province over. Do you not have anyone in the city?” Theo shook his head. “I left my friends and family in Quebec to move here for my work.” “No contacts here? A significant other perhaps?” Sydryn asked. “What about that Henderson man?” “No, he's just a friend. We're co-workers, I couldn't make him my emergency contact.” “Very well, but I would suggest keeping your friends close,” Sydryn said. “Even a typical human pregnancy isn't easy to handle alone.” They paused then raised a finger. “Actually, there's a pregnancy group here at APID that could benefit you.” “Really?” Theo rubbed his neck. “For alien pregnancies?” “No, for pregnancies in general,” Sydryn said. “And if you’re worried about possibly being the only man they, it's actually majority men.” “You're kidding.” Theo lit up a bit. “Other pregnant men?” “Like Ix, I'm not a kidder. It is primarily for others who have experienced pregnancy and can share their knowledge and experiences. But I'm sure they can help you feel comfortable.” Theo nodded. “I think… Once I get my bearings in all this… I might actually think about going to that. Thanks.” “Let me know if and when you’d like to go,” Sydryn said. “They meet on Fridays. I sit in on occasion, but I can also understand if you’d rather I didn’t. Not everyone wants their doctor listening in on their personal life.” “Yeah, we’ll see…” Theo rubbed his neck. “Oh, um... I'm technically pregnant, right?” “You are pregnant, yes.” “Do I have to stop my injections?” The doctor shook their head. “Technically no, testosterone injections would not affect a celestial pregnancy, however it might cease to be effective in your transition considering the pregnancy will be preparing you for birth by raising your estrogen levels.” Theo swallowed hard. “Will it reverse my transition then?” “No, no... Fret not,” Sydryn said. “While you might find some changes seem reversed, a lot of FTM transition features are permanent. You're not likely to lose hair growth and your voice will remain the same. Your hips might get wider though...” Theo frowned. “So T. Not worth it.” “Not right now.” “I really should've scheduled a hysterectomy...” “We'll get through this. Don't worry.” Sydryn proceeded to do a physical examination, taking all of Theo’s measurements and checking his vitals. He was in good health despite the pregnancy, though it was clear the new weight was causing issues. Oddly, he didn’t have a single stretchmark from his rapid growth, and Syd suspected it was due to celestial influence. He was overall the same as he was before but with a bigger abdomen. After the exam, Sydryn suggested that Theo stay at APID one more night just to see if any changes occurred. If his growth had stabilised, then he could go home and they'd proceed from there. Theo agreed to it. He had breakfast with Fay after, and the other was keen on getting to know his new client. They talked for a while and Theo found out he was married with eight children. He and his husband both went to the pregnancy group that Sydryn had talked about and it made Theo feel a bit better about it, knowing he'd already know someone there. Theo talked about his job as a translator and they had that in common too; Fay apparently also translated for APID. As a siren however, it took him often no more than a few minutes with someone to learn their language without ever having heard it before. He could understand anyone, though he couldn't always speak the language of another species due to physiology. Theo only knew his native French and English. He was starting to think taking one of Henderson's classes wouldn't be a bad idea...

“Ta-da!” “What…is that?” Henderson was holding up a big bright green T-shirt with APID printed gaudily across the chest. He’d come back to APID after work to take Theo home. “I imagine your clothes don’t fit now so I got this for you on my way back from class.” “…Gee. Thanks.” Theo had already changed into his own clothes hours ago, but it was true, his own shirt did not fully cover his new burgeoning belly. He attempted to tuck his shirt into his pants but the slightest movement untucked it and it seemed like the APID shirt was going to have to be the one for the way home. “…You’d think the branding of a secret government organisation would be more subtle…” “It’s really not a secret anymore, you know that,” Henderson said. “And after the name change, they made up all this merch I guess to really sell the new name. I was lucky enough to get my hands on one of the limited edition throw blankets. Wanna come back to mine and see it?” “No, thanks… I really just want to go home,” Theodore said. “…I’ve had a shit day.” “Ah, I guess I’ll just have to bring it over then.” “Henderson!” Theo snapped. “I really don’t care about your blanket!” Henderson blinked and threw up his hands. “Sorry, I… Sorry. Bad day. Blankets don’t matter. You matter.” “Mon dieu…” Theo rubbed his face, his tears welling up again. “No, I’m sorry… I know you’re just trying to help…” Henderson panicked a moment. “Oh, shit... Um, it's gonna be okay...” He gave him a hug as best he could with Theo's belly digging into his gut. “Let's get you home.” Theo pulled away from Henderson after a few moments in the hug. “...I'll take the shirt.” Henderson nodded and handed it over. Theo proceeded to undress to his waist, his mood visibly falling once his stomach was exposed. Henderson restrained himself from reaching out and touching the belly again, knowing it would likely just upset Theo. Instead, he hooked his hands under his own armpits and tried not to watch. “So, um... Nine months of this, yeah?” “Yeah...” Theo sighed. “I don't know what I'm gonna do every day looking like this... Like, what will my boss think?” “Mm... You should ask these doctors here for a sick note of some kind, something to explain the swell and letting you off the hook in case you need some days off.” He pulled a hand out and snapped his fingers. “I got it. You've got a tumour.” “A tumour?” Theo grimaced. “What like, cancer? I don't want to lie about having cancer...” “No, no, it could be benign,” Henderson suggested. “But still not good for you because of the size. And-and it's complex and the only surgeon good enough to operate is away for the next nine months. How about that?” Theo stared at Henderson. “You're crazy.” Henderson shook his head. “Naw, you just don't want to admit that I'm a genius.” Theo sighed. “Just take me home...” “Yeah, yeah... Also, you're welcome.” “Huh?” “For the shirt.” “Oh. Yeah, I said ‘thanks' already.” “Sure, but I hadn't said ‘you're welcome' so I said it now. It's only polite.” “Whatever.”

#lore #Theo #Sydryn #Köbi #Henderson #Ix #alien #yulinian #Transman #trans preg

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