#i just can't fuckin showcase that bc I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY

[anachronistic-falsehood]

ok ok. fuck it. trigun voltron au

livio, meryl, and milly are senior students at wherever the fuck. the garrison?? i can't remember what it's called i haven't watched it in years. anyway meryl's a pilot, milly is a mechanic, livio and razlo are their tech guy. lina is there and she's like 14 but she's actively lying about her age so she can try to get into the senior programs and go into space to find her long lost brother figure, who is apparently an alien and crash landed to earth a little over two years ago and then went back into space. she's hanging with wolfwood a lot. wolfwood is very keith. he dropped out a while ago because he is also coincidentally looking for an alien he met two years ago but the garrison won't let him go into space for Reasons. more under the cut bc this is getting Long

shenanigans ensue and all five of them find the blue lion. lina is like "whoa this thing is talking to me" and finds that she can pilot the blue lion and they go into fucking space and end up on another planet?? terrifying!! but they end up finding this big fuckin. castle lookin spaceship. and instead of having the dramatic "alien wakes up from cryo sleep and falls into the arms of their love interest" thing, vash is fucking walking around in his pyjamas eating food goo and crashes into wolfwood in the middle of a hallway and there's food goo everywhere and it's hilarious. wolfwood is like "YOU!! YOU'RE THE FUCKING ALIEN I SAW. WHO ARE YOU" but vash is like "OH MY GOD LINA???" and they have a wonderful heartwarming reunion and wolfwood is still wondering what the fuck vash is

vash gets dressed and takes them to the main area to explain some things. there's like a full flashback episode which showcases him fresh out of cryosleep (he was like scheduled to wake up centuries in the future or something just go with it) and learning (via a dead rem hologram's instructions) that he has to find the locations of the voltron lions to ready them for their paladins because the galaxy needs voltron or somethin. idk. but he crash lands on earth bc he knows nothing about piloting a pod and lina and sheryl find him and take care of him until he's better. he's like a cryptid and wolfwood (while out skipping class or w/e) sees vash on the horizon and is like "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU??" and is convinced that whatever he saw was Not Human. he tries to tell the people at the garrison abt it but they're like "nah" and he eventually drops out in hopes that he can find the alien on his own.

vash explains to them about the alteans, and the galra trying to take over the universe, and VOLTRON!! and he's like "i feel like you guys are the paladins but idk so let's just go find the lions and see who clicks with who. fun bonding experience!!!!"

lina pilots them to all the different places they need to get the lions at, and they each have their own cool lil moments :3 in the jungle finding the green lion, meryl tells the others that she can hear a voice and they allow her to take the lead, and u know that scene with pidge jumping down to get the lion?? that but with meryl!! also milly findin the yellow lion and screaming in a panic as she plows through galra ships like they're nothing. they're so silly <3

and then!!! and then they're rescuing the red lion from a galra ship (i think the red lion was kept by the galra?? can't remember) and none of them can hear the lion. vash says that's ok, the red lion is very tempermental, she'll need to speak to one of you first before she chooses a paladin bc she's very picky. but?? neither ww nor livio can hear her??? and neither can vash so it's not like she picked him. but razlo has been casually hovering near the front bc lots of dangerous situations, gotta keep livio safe, and he's like "hey. hey liv. can you?? hear that???" and livio's like "???? hear what???" and there are galra soldiers trying to break down the door and liv is like this close to panicking so razlo's like ok FUCK IT and shoves his way to the front to protect livio, but as soon as he's there the lion's eyes light up and she fucking MOVES. and razlo is fucking ecstatic as he climbs into the pilot seat and goes full speed ahead and livio's quietly like "ohhhhh. ok. so do i not get a lion then. ok whatever im not upset or anything" and he's reallyyyy trying hard not to be upset bc razlo never seems to get anything, yk. livio's the one whose name is on their pilot license, he's the one with the engineering degree, only ww knows about razlo, so like. he feels selfish for wanting this too so he tries to just. let razlo have this. (and that's like the basis of his and razlo's character arcs, razlo letting himself have a life outside of being a shield for livio, and livio proving himself as a copilot of the red lion and earning her trust and this almost makes me want to write a fic istg)

wolfwood is the paladin of the black lion, and they go back to the castle to let her out (i think they needed the other four to unlock her?? or something??? idk) knives isn't a galra but he's posing as one and the gung ho guns are his right hand guys. also wolfwood is part galra (i'm sorry he's so keith coded) and maybeeee.... wolfwood had more of a reason to try finding vash than he originally let on.......... (he was hired to find and kill vash. it did not go well. he fell in love instead <3)

when wolfwood dies, vash pilots the black lion in his stead. ok that's all thank youuuuu <3

#whiskey yelling into the void #trigun #there's definitely more to this au that i have in my brain i have ideas for everyone's individual character arcs #but this post is long enough. ok. this is all you're getting #i'd wanna include roberto solely as a tool for meryl's character arc but idk how i would do that?? i think he'd have to be human #i'm NOT writing a fic for this I SWEAR I'M NOTTTTTT I CAN'T I DON'T HAVE TIME #but maybe..... maybe someday in the future... i might write a small one. for funsies <3

[svtskneecaps]

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#congratulations mom you raised a fucking parrot #a goddamn pushover #literally i have the conversational functionality of one of those toys where they repeat what you said but higher #like OH MY GOD #like i never noticed until my fucking grade and sense of self worth depended on it but #i have zero opinions?? #i just agree with whatever somebody said #i'm pretty sure even in ENGLISH conversations my contributions are limited to 'what' and 'yeah' #but literally my mental stability depends on me forming opinions by like....... tomorrow #i don't have opinions on anything that matters?? or even on anything that doesn't?? #my grasp of the language is probably fine #like i understand a lot. my comprehension's p good! #i just can't fuckin showcase that bc I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY #and !! i just want to cry !! bc honestly most of my identity depends on my schoolwork and i stg if i got this far just to lose my ib diploma #bc i have zero opinions #i'm never gonna fucking forgive myself #negativity #shut up vic #not kpop