#i just gotta vent

[yvmoveon]

I need people around me who provide me peace and who I want to provide peace to. I just want peace all around me.

#spilled thoughts #thoughts #please don’t mine me #p #i feel like there’s always d something #i only complain on here 💀 #sorry if my posts seem negative #i just gotta vent

[tigertae]

I am *this* close to giving up.

Not even kidding.

#I just gotta vent #don't even mind me. #not that anyone does anyways but still

[hajihiko]

Don't be mad over dumb internet things. Or, if it's inevitable, share it with someone unconcerned and then laugh about it later

#Badly disguised 'vent' rushed comic lol sometimes ppl on the internet are a Lot #Vent is in quotes bc I'm not actually venting I saw drama from a distance and thought 'wow I ain't going near that' #I'm actually doing p good! Just lacking the creative juices lol I am SO busy and I gotta finish commissions first #Hajime hinata #Fuyuhiko kuzuryu #Sdr2 #Super danganronpa 2 #Kuzuhina #Catch the homestuck reference #An art

[hai-nae]

meant to post these sketches a few days ago? a week? but, well, life.

#red dead redemption 2 #my art #my fics #arthur morgan #rdr #rdr2 #rdr2 fanart #young arthur morgan #and a wee little hs of wolf!arthur #today is the first day of the last 3 ive gotten to eat more than a single meal a day #my bp dropped at work n since it was a vision black out i had to post up in the friggin stall like batman on a ceiling so i didnt fall #which sucks since i have a manual labor job but luckily i didnt reach the shakin stage just kept gettin the dots n focus static #been sleepin n readin to avoid attention on hunger pains since i had no energy for drawin #finally got to have dinner last night since we got some money and i gotta say i dont miss the feelin of chokin on food i wanted so bad #man i love tags most ppl dont read em n i get some catharsis to vent in em

[mintaikcorpse]

Me reading a fic where the person had an identidy realization that they were in he aroace spectrum and now they were figuring themselves out(I finally found something that understood me and a romance I could relate to after all these years)

#love loses! you're on the aroace spectrum and you dont fucking know what you are but you're definitely on the spectrum #but it's so hard to explain bcuz how do youve never had a real crush on someone but also have had platonic feelings for someone #and dont want to do the romance thing but also still want to have a queer platonic relationship and do romance things? #YOU DONT #IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE TO ME BUT I JUST KNOW #ESPECIALLY BECAUSE I CANT JUST GET CRUSHES ON PEOPLE IT TAKES YEARS I'VE ONLY HAD 1 CRUSH THROUGHOUT MY LIFE #AND I JUST WANTWD TO BE FRIENDS WITH HIM #I thought that was just me but the author was projecting and explained perfectly what i was going through #and ik i say “I cried” a lot when talking about something but i did actually cry #had to put my phone down bcuz it felt so nice to be understood #idk just venting and rambling lol #aroace #ace spectrum #gotta keep a journal on this bcuz i want to explain to people but it's so hard for even me to grasp #and i feel like they won't believe me anyways bcuz ive tried to himt st it but i just get weird looks #its annoying but it is what it is #aromantic #asexual #lgbt #queer #talking #rambling

[2hoothoots]

i was having a chuckle to myself last night about Gristol, and how his plans are basically:

Restore Ford Cruller's memory

Find Maligula

???

Profit

but then... of course they are, right? this is Gristol we're talking about. Fatherland Follies drives home again and again that he's still operating on a child's logic, a warped and reductive version of the world that he never bothered to grow out of. both of his memory vaults center on the images of his childhood, this idealized version of the past that he clings to no matter what. and that's still how he remembers Maligula, too - as this saviour figure, who rushes in to help him when he's in trouble.

[ID: Two slides from Gristol's memory vault, Glory to Grulovia! Left: Gristol clings to Maligula's back as she summons waves to sweep away his assailants. Right: Gristol and Maligula waving from a balcony as the people cheer. Gzar Theodore brandishes a dagger in the background.]

like so much else, Maligula represents a return to this idyllic childhood - to the peace and simplicity of his youth, when he was free from worries and responsibilities. in his mind, he doesn't need to make any further plans - once Maligula's back, everything will go back to normal. Maligula will make everything better.

...is what i thought, but then i remembered this line:

[Screenshot source. ID: Gristol, in Truman's body, bows on his hands and knees in front of the newly-awaked Maligula. The caption reads: "Yes, High Priestess! I am here to correct the mistakes made by my father!"]

and that's kind of interesting, right?

to be clear: this happens directly after Maligula sees Helmut-in-Gristol's-body, and recognises him. her line before this is:

"Little Gzesaravich! Have you come to pay for your father's sins?"

my first thought was that Gristol hadn't expected to still be in Truman's body by the time he managed to find Maligula, and this was him trying to placate her and buy some time until he could explain the situation. but watching the cutscene back, that's clearly not what's happening here. Gristol is answering as himself, and his response of throwing himself to his knees before her is, as far as i can tell, genuine.

so what is going on here?

in Fatherland Follies, there's this line in the ride narration that stuck out to me:

"Why didn't the Gzar help Maligula in her time of need? No one knows, but historians agree - it is Gzar Theodore's biggest failure."

other lines mention Gzar Theodore's "mistake", and it's wording Gristol himself echoes in the screencap above. evidently, he believes that his father abandoned Maligula, leaving her to her fate at the hands of the Psychonauts, and it was that mistake that lead to them being driven out of the country - that mistake which he seeks to correct. maybe he even feels like he has a debt to repay to her for his family turning their backs on her all those years ago.

the 'High Priestess' thing, though - that's kinda weird, and threw me for a loop the first time i played the game. it took me until my second playthrough to connect the dots, and remember how the room in the Lady Luctopus - Gristol's room - was full of Delugionist scribblings and symbols.

[Screenshot source. ID: left, the walls of the hidden backroom in Gristol's hotel suite, covered in scrawlings of eyeballs and Maligula's name. Right, the pinboard from the hidden backroom. On its surface are photographs and newspaper clippings connected by pieces of string.]

i mean, look at this stuff! he had a whole conspiracy board and everything!

we learn very little about the Delugionists and their beliefs as a whole during the game, but i think drawing the connection here suggests two important things. one: that Gristol was in deep with this stuff. i don't know how he linked up with them - maybe via old family connections, or just good old-fashioned digging (we know he's skilled at worming his way into peoples' good graces, after all) - but it seems likely that he's begun to internalise their ideas, maybe even warping his own memories of events. and two: the Delugionists themselves are, if you'll pardon the pun, pretty far off the deep end.

like... i understand why PN2 didn't go heavy on the "mass-murderer cult worship" aspect of things, in the end, but man this is such a tantalising glimpse into the wider mythos around Maligula. Gristol is proud and haughty and thinks himself above everyone else; the fact that his first reaction seeing Maligula is to throw himself to the ground at her feet says so much about the way he's come to see her. he's not just trying to bring back Maligula, his childhood bodyguard. he's trying to bring back Maligula, the High Priestess of the deluge, the semi-mythical figure whose supporters believe even death couldn't stop. he doesn't even flinch at the way she confronts him, and maybe it's because he's bought in so completely to this deified figurehead, this idea of Maligula; more a living force of nature than a person. and it all comes back to the same place: an abdication of responsibility, not just to the person who protected him when he was little but to this avatar of floods and destruction. Maligula will make everything better.

i'd write more about my thoughts on the Delugionists but that'd be taking a hard turn into speculation, and this is already kind of long and rambling so i'd better end it here. but what an unexpected and evocative line, right? it's some of the only stuff we have to go off of regarding the Delugionists as a whole, but i think it does such a good job of hinting at the wider story - at teasing another layer to the mythos surrounding Maligula, one whose ripples we see throughout the game but which never quite breaches the surface.

#psychonauts #psychonauts 2 #bored waiting at the airport so you get more psychonauts meta from me #the delugionists have been on my mind recently (because i Might Just have an upcoming au lorepost about them and also cults are fun) #so tossing my thoughts up here because people seemed to like the last few times i did this #and also it's my blog and i like to talk :) #related vent i HATE drafting posts in the tumblr editor because if you hit crtl+z to try and undo a formatting change #it deletes like half the post you just typed out #(yes i did it again while i was writing this. yes i'm still salty. why do i even bother) #what else... this is just becoming a disconnected thoughts dump #but if you've seen my posts you knew what you were signing up for when you hit the button to expand the post tags #there's new art coming hopefully this weekend if i can get it finished! it's more mermaid au designs #i'm two and a half weeks late for mermay but it turns out starting a new job and moving house doesn't leave you with a ton of free time #but that's okay it's never too late for mermaids #omg and artfight's coming up next month too! geez #i gotta make refsheets for the fsau trio because i would LOVE to get art of them #and this year i don't have a thesis to crunch on so i might actually have time to participate #oh and then in august i'm having top surgery! will make a proper announcement post for it at some point #i say 'announcement'. it's just a life update but it's nice to share #i'm super excited about it :) #i might end up blogging the process and recovery but obviously it won't be going here lol. i'd put it on my main #idk if anyone would find it useful but when i first started looking into surgery i had like very little idea about the whole process #and it's only through joining a bunch of online support/discussion groups that i managed to find more info and resources #so hey it might be useful to share? we'll see #our flight doesn't land for another fifty minutes so now i'm just writing in the tags because i'm bored #alright i'll proofread this and then post it when i land and have signal again. peace out yall hope your pride month is going well

[tomahachi12]

#the amazing digital circus #pomni #toma art #I’m gonna be honest #I feel like I’ve completely lost confidence in my art #like #all of it #now whenever I sit down to draw #or even just set up my tablet #a wave of anxiety just crashes into me #and I erase everything and shut off the tablet #makes it reeeeeeeeeally hard to keep drawing #hell even thinking about drawing gets me anxious #idk #maybe I just gotta fight my way through it #and just draw anyway #but that was my vent #thnx for readin

[zebratimw]

Spirit animal SQH

#svsss #shang qinghua #but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but #but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee #also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but #I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg #oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left #I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something #or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird #LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm #I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either #I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself #eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it... #I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up #I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa #man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong #cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk #its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment #with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig #and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down #but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀 #irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living... #just the ol regulars yknow? #and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want? #I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what? #whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate? #so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it? #that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications #and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly #man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk

[rotbtd-edits]

/vent incoming.

This . . . is Berk. A bit trampled, and busted, and covered in ice, but it's home. It's our home. Those who attacked us are relentless and crazy. But those who stopped them? Oh, even more so! We may be small in numbers, but we stand for something bigger than anything the world can pit against us. We are the voice of peace. And bit by bit, we will change this world. - Hiccup in HTTYD2

And this here kinda summarizes why I want to pretend the 3rd movie doesn't exist, because it just undid everything the first 2 movies (and tv shows) had established before :))))

"We will show the world dragons and people can co-exist, and we've been successful in defending our homes and lifestyle! No evil tyrants will bring us down! Oh what was that? An evil dude is after us again? Welp I guess we were wrong all along, time for the dragons to skedaddle into a small hiding hole then!"

:)))))))))))))))))))

/vent end.

#random ramblings #i'm sorry but i just had to vent a bit #because I REALLY just don't like the 3rd movie #for several reasons #random rantings #tag to block if someone doesnt wanna see my vents #I usually keep these to myself but sometimes you just gotta let the bottle pop :')

[autistic-katara]

me: dude im not even feeling that tired rn and haven’t for ages oh no oh fuck im probably accidentally faking my disability-

my chronic fatigue, loading ammunition into a massive fucking cannon: damn really bro?

#been so tired these past like 2 days #like not regular gotta lie down tired nah #like i don’t have the energy to do basically anything tired #and again i don’t mean like idk i can’t wash the dishes cause idk i’m sleepy or whatever #i mean like i physically can’t do or say like double the amount i normally can’t #like i’ll know how to do smthn or what to say clearly in my head but i just don’t have the energy to get it out if that makes sense #and that’s not like all of it but it’s one of the worst parts (at least rn) #like i feel like i’m actually going insane cause of this it’s just rlly weird #idek i am also like i gotta lie down most of the day tired #but it’s not that strong idk #this is turning into kinda a vent idk #but it’s fine to rb the actual post is fine #chronically ill #chronic fatigue #disabled

[simplydnp]

Dan talking abt how tiktok is “the downfall of humanity” gave very millennial😭. Girl don’t act like you weren’t on tumblr in its peak years and don’t scroll on twitter every day (arguably worse). It’s just a pet peeve of mine when people say that because thats literally what gen x/boomers said about everything on the internet. MySpace was the true start of the downfall of humanity imo. Everything else just followed along! 👺

well he is a millenial 😔

i think he's trying to be conscious of everything that comes along with tiktok--safety concerns, privacy concerns, as well as the erasure of the creator and the platforming of The Algorithm.

he doesn't deny there's good content there, he even says in the video if his fyp gave him this content continually, he would use it. but he's all too aware of the advertising and prevalence of the algorithm. and, he's concerned about the amount of time people (cough, phil, cough) put into it.

i think they're valid concerns. i think having good-faith criticism about the things you choose to spend your time on are important. not that having guilt all the time is good, but something doesn't have to be 'perfect' in order for you to interact with it. (see youtube, twitter, and even here with tumblr)

i'll be honest, i'm a gen z who doesn't use tiktok. there's good tiktoks out there, but i prefer a different type of slop (everything is slop don't lie to yourself).

like if it really bothers you that much i suggest you sit with that discomfort and figure out why.

a lot of people older than gen z shit on tiktok because they think it's turning the frogs gay--it's just a title of something they can blame their hatred of everything different from them on, and their disgust for the youth who dare to not live by their morals. it's not about tiktok itself. whereas dan is seeing the flaws and faults of the app and the culture. you don't have to agree with him, but his opinion on it shouldn't ruin your day. he's just a guy.

#idk hes not attacking you for using it. theres bigger things yknow. like your feelings are valid. but if its that big of a deal consider why #fuck other peoples opinions! do what makes you happy! (as long as you arent hurting people) #like tiktok good tiktok bad is just not realistic. its all fucking grey okay. you gotta get used to living in ambiguity. fuck purity culture #idk why you chose me specifically but clearly you needed to vent about it. i hope this helps you process it anon. #dnp #c.text #answered

[lilybug-02]

Holy Cow haHahA

Artist Imposter syndrome really kicking in for some reason 🦋 HAHA Anxiety is off the charts WOOOOOO

I’m gonna go sit down woooo 🦖

#bruh it’s hitting so hard for some reason holy freaking hell #damn I’m feelin’ every sin of my artist hand #pretend you didn’t see this ✌️ #It’s really just about the comic… I love attention on it since I’ve worked so hard but dang is it something very personal and it obviously #shows imperfections in my work and ahhhh haha ooof I’m alright. just gotta sleep it off #vent #tw vent

[lavenoon]

Sometimes the thoughts get too loud, and catharsis doesn't come until you feel safe

#post let luce #fnaf sb #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #my art #cw vent art #it was meant as comfort but better safe than sorry #I'll be fine I just need a bit for my brain to stop being stupid #“drew this for myself but yall can have it too” #thing is I drew a couple discord only comics n thought oh I gotta post smth again #and then bad brain hit and that made the “I gotta post I'm letting people down” thoughts worse #so uh. yeah. sorry it's vent art? #it's a silent one at least. no words #wish yall feel held too

[froggymarsh]

hello scu enjoyers here's a little r!charlie with cg!schlatt yesyes. it is set in a zombie apocalypse so trigger warning for non-graphic mentions of zombies and also a gun! i dont describe any blood or gore or anything dwdw - also maybe slight unreality for the line "was any of that real?" near the end

hope u enjoy <3

//

“Oh, hey Charlie.”

Charlie’s head snaps up, meeting the eyes of a charming man standing behind the pristine counter of a little hole-in-the-wall bar that Charlie has never seen here before. His buttoned shirt is crisp, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows as he polishes a glass with a red rag. His apron is black and stainless. His hair is curled, his beard is groomed and well kept. His eyes are brown, and he smiles at Charlie as if nothing is wrong with the world.

“H-hey,” Charlie stammers. He looks up at the walls, the iron bars lining the entrance. He doesn’t remember walking inside, but here he is. The floor is strangely even, no plants, no rocks, no cracks. The groans of the infected outside seem so far away. “Hey- how do you know my name?”

The man’s smile does not change. His eyes flicker from brown to gold and back again. Charlie glances around the room. The light of the torches set in the walls is not comforting in the slightest.

“So,” the man sets the glass aside, slings the rag over one shoulder, and braces both arms on the counter. “Milk or juice?”

“What?”

“You look like you could use it,” he answers, simple as that. His fingers tap along the countertop. “Milk or juice?”

“What is going on, dude, how do y-”

“Milk,” he interrupts, eyes flickering again. Charlie shuts his mouth as the man’s expression changes just so, like a mountain challenging a pebble to a battle of might, or a sun backhanding a star out of the sky.

Then the man smiles again, simple as that. “Or juice?”

Charlie grips the straps of his backpack, a pebble, a pebble, a pebble. The groans of the infected feel like a hazy memory. He takes a step towards the counter, strangely uneven on the even ground.

“Juice, please,” he murmurs, taking a seat on one of the stools. It’s plush, comfortable, with a bar at the bottom for his feet. He swings them instead.

“Good choice,” the man praises, "now,” he laughs, “maybe this one’ll getcha. Bottle or cup?”

Charlie blinks. The mountain looms on the other side of the counter, with an amused smile on its face.

“Cup,” he answers, softer than he means to, but he can’t help it when he feels like a pebble, maybe all of four years old. The room gets hazy at the edges of his vision.

“Now, now, Charlie,” the man scolds lightly, almost teasing, almost stern, amused all around, “I think we both know the correct answer here.”

Charlie frowns, eyebrows furrowing. Was that not it?

“Cup, please,” he tries again.

The man tsks. “Charlie…”

He says nothing.

The man sighs.

“Tell you what, kiddo,” he leans over, sliding the glass easily off the counter and stowing it away underneath. He fishes around for something else, his smile still charming, his expression warm but oddly intense. “We’ll compromise.”

He returns with a dark green sippy cup with a light green lid. Two and a half hearts decorate the side, glaring up at Charlie. He looks away as the man retrieves another bottle from somewhere else. This one has a golden apple printed on the side.

“‘fraid apple juice is all we’ve got.”

Charlie shrugs. Apple’s fine.

The man smiles as he pours it, screwing on the cap and sliding it to him when it’s full. “Knew you’d be a good sport about that.”

Charlie wraps his hands around the sippy cup. It’s the perfect size to hold like this. His shoulders sag in relief, oddly comforted by this little bit of plastic.

“You’re doing so well,” the man praises. Charlie can’t help but preen at that a bit, turning the cup in his hands but not yet taking a drink. “I’ll step in as needed, but it’s quite honestly remarkable just how far you’ve come.”

Charlie tries to smile at him, tries to show he’s grateful.

The man chuckles, reaching over the counter to ruffle his hair. Charlie ducks away, swatting at his hand.

“Alright, well. You better scram, kid,” he reaches under the counter again, this time producing a gun. Charlie blinks. The haze in his head fades as he whirls around, spots five infected approaching. How did he not notice them getting so close?

“I’ll hold them off,” the man’s voice raises dangerously as he storms out of the bar with his gun, seizing Charlie’s collar and dragging him out with him, abandoning the bottle on the counter. He shoves him one way and fires the gun in the other, “go, kid. Go!”

Charlie stumbles, unsteady, but runs. He runs, ducking between infected and swerving around buildings and runs, fast as he can manage as they follow, running, groaning behind him, and he runs, and his foot catches a stone and he falls and he rolls and he-

//

When he comes to, the sun is rising.

He jolts upright in bed. He’s home. He’s safe.

His jacket is pristine. There’s new patches on the elbows. There are no scuffs on his armor. His legs are fine, his heart is beating regularly, nothing is sore.

Cradled in his hand is a green sippy cup, decorated with two and a half hearts on the side that glare up at him.

He swallows.

Was any of that real?

He turns it over. There’s nothing inside, though taped to the bottom is a messy, scrawled note.

Keep it, it reads. Signed with a simple, -J

#mcyt agere #froggy drabbles #raaaarararararrrrr.... #i gotta finish the video.... #idk how to trigger warn so lemme know if you think this needs somethin else #I DIDNT MOVE OVER MY TAGS FROM MY FIRST DRAFT OF THIS. so im doing it now. nobody will read them but it's important to me that theyre here #something about trying to be comforted but everything is awful and uneasy and no matter how hard you try you just. can’t. #not vent regression not play regression but a secret third thing #i was saving this interaction for somethin else but i’ll use it here skdkfjf

[venacoeurva]

I feel kind of insane that it was a very strong consensus that AI voices are unethical because the original VAs never consented to their voices being used in this way, are not compensated, and their voices are being used for things they never agreed/would never agree to say and it doesn't matter if these uses are commercial in nature or not, it feels very ghoulish, but one of the biggest trends rn is AI covers of songs and they're being pumped out like crazy and people are falling over themselves to defend people who don't have big time production budgets using them instead of hiring someone on Fiverr or imitating the voices themselves or voice clip mixing and sampling pre-existing lines like the olden days. ok. alright. Good to see some of you out there have the moral fortitude of a wet paper straw

#vena vents #not art #I think the only ethical voice synthesis ones are vocaloids and tts with a small pool of compensated speakers tbh #Because yeah your voice might read out some weird shit but you kind of gotta know and accept that before being sampled for those purposes #the VAs in the case of AI did not agree to that and are all very vocal about not wanting their voices sampled #I feel like most who were aware of uberduck and w/e early on just kind of didn't care because it was obvious clunky tts for fun #but creative AI are so predatory and violating and often hard to parse if AI or not these days it's way different

[p1x1x]

my little yuri guys so far

#my art #oc art #i still havent decided on names… #feels like a scary decision.. its gotta be Good #yuri………….. #fanart brain where ? #(ngl besides kinda being dead rn some of it stems from thinking my arts not good enough to make a good fanart… so i turned to oc for a bit #and i did try to draw some idea but they just Looked Bad so. orz #sorry for tiny venting kdhddhhfdhdghd uaaaaaaaaghghggghghhg #mayhaps i need to record a timelapse again to kick the brain into focus too #ough……) #hooray for weekend tho