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#i just really hate p chem
kotarotea10 months ago
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summary: being known for your bright personality easily gets you a soft spot in the hearts of the many people you鈥檝e come to meet and know as you go through university. you can light up a room with just your smile and when you finally meet the guy that doesn鈥檛 react the way everyone else does, your eagerness to receive that reaction from him only grows. they say 鈥榙on鈥檛 poke the bear鈥 but of course, you just can鈥檛 help yourself.
pairing:聽kyoutani kentarou x fem!reader
genre:聽college!au, tatted!kyo, bubbly/happy!reader, fluff//angst; (his hair is longer and cuter now i promise)
word count:聽8.8k
warnings:聽language and slight mentions of smoke/alcohol
A/N:聽i don鈥檛 even simp for this guy how- anyways, ig i just thought he鈥檇 be the perfect fit for this. who鈥檇 you like to see next? (header will change bc i don鈥檛 like it) sorry this took a little long to post!! :(
taglist:聽@matsukas @cafemiya @oikcore @crescenttooru @tetsurolls @mirakeul @kimkai-is-my-man @jeannie-beannie @camcam1617 @lvrkuroo @kookie-doughs @mellowknightcolorfarm @waitforitillwritemywayout @toworuu @bbykutos @haajiime聽@miyalove鈥 @hikariakaashi鈥嬄燖kurooru鈥嬧
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welcome to the frat house! meet KYOUTANI!
only in the frat because of his buddies from high school (they forced him to join)
v antisocial because he doesn鈥檛 like people.
how he got in the frat? a mystery.
he鈥檚 got the dark and brooding aura (i.e. all black, leather, tattoos *mwah*)
spends the parties in the back on the outside patio, smoking.
will get girls from time to time trying to tame him but it never works out for them.
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so...
you鈥檝e had a bit too much to drink tonight.
in your friend group, you鈥檙e definitely the one who ~loves~ having fun at parties
you鈥檙e the one who usually drags your friends to parties and although your friends get into it too (hey, there鈥檚 cute guys, girls, and booze), you鈥檙e just a bubble of energy at parties.
you tend to be the one tugging at your friend鈥檚 (and sometimes stranger鈥檚) arms onto the dance floor with the biggest smile.
but tonight, you went a little too far with the drinking.
鈥渙of, i think i maxed my limit, girls.鈥 you鈥檙e swaying now, pushing the red solo cup away from you for one of your friend鈥檚 to take. 鈥渄on鈥檛 really wanna black out so can you take this from me?鈥
since you were an avid party goer at this specific frat, you practically knew the members of the frat beyond being mere acquaintances.
you were there to help kuroo by holding his chem flashcards and test him when he had a final the next day (whatta nerd :P).
you were one of the only valuable players kenma would play video games with in the dark game room.
you were there to console atsumu (platonically) when he was feeling emo (it was the alcohol, he promises) because his twin managed to pull a girl he鈥檇 been eying for hours.
yeah, you were practically one of the bros by now.
(not a toxic one !! please, you try to set them up with your friends ALL the time)
akaashi grabs your cup from you.
to be honest, you didn鈥檛 even see where he had came from but you鈥檙e grateful nevertheless.
鈥渓et鈥檚 get some fresh air, yeah?鈥 akaashi grabs your elbow and you nod, feeling your head begin to pound from feeling claustrophobic and hot in the crowded room.
akaashi mumbles something to one of the friends you came with before pulling you out of the large group of people.
he brings you to a back porch and you instantly inhale a breath of cool air
the air was freezing when you arrived to the party but with the hot house and alcohol in your system, it felt like just a light breeze to you.
鈥渄o you want some water?鈥 akaashi asks but before you could answer, he snaps his fingers. 鈥渋鈥檓 getting you some water, i鈥檒l be right back.鈥
you wave lazily to him as he walks back into the house and you turn back around when you lose sight of him in the crowd.
for a few moments you鈥檙e looking out at the sky, leaned against the porch railing (you can鈥檛 hold yourself up oop) and a slight rustle beside you makes you realize you aren鈥檛 alone.
鈥渉ey!鈥 you grin, seeing another man leaned against the railing, similar to how you were, smoking a cigarette.
the guy turns to you and in the dim light of the porch lamp, you could see his peeved expression. he scoffs and looks away from you.
hmph, you pout, unhappy with the response.
鈥渋t鈥檚 kinda rude to just ignore a greeting like that, y鈥檏now?鈥 you take a sidestep closer to the guy.
鈥渋f i wanted to talk i鈥檇 be in there,鈥 the guy juts his thumb in the direction of the back door. 鈥渘ow if you could shut up, i鈥檇 really appreciate that.鈥
鈥溾榮hut up?鈥欌 you repeat, taking another step toward him. 鈥測ou鈥檙e asking the wrong girl.鈥 you let out an airy laugh at the way he huffs in response.
by then, you were standing right beside the guy and you could finally get a better look at him.
his eyebrows seem to be furrowed, almost in a permanent way and his piercing eyes look like they could probably intimidate someone from a mile away.
with just one look, you鈥檇 get the message of聽鈥榞o away,鈥 from him.
too bad you鈥檙e y/n, wattpad queen of 鈥榠鈥檓 not like other girls.鈥
鈥渨hy d鈥檡ou look so mad?鈥 you lean froward slightly, hoping to grab his attention.
鈥渨hat the fuck?鈥 he just notices your close proximity and jumps back, slightly startled. 鈥渨ho鈥檚 with you and where are they?鈥
was it because he just noticed how wasted you were by your slurring words and waddling figure that he cared?
or was it because he wanted to get as far away from you as possible?
the second one, totally the second one.
(*cough* sure *cough*)
鈥渕y friend鈥檚 are in there having fun. akaashi brought me out 鈥榥 he鈥檚 getting me water.鈥
鈥渋 see.鈥 his voice is deep and gruff and a stark contrast to yours.聽
he was head to toe in all black the only complementary color being silver from the chains dangling from his neck and jeans, and rings adorning his fingers.
(choke me like you hate me-)
underneath the black leather jacket he was wearing, you notice inks of black going up his neck and down his hand.
his hair is what makes you stare a little closer. the cut was shorter toward the bottom of his head and was more grown out at the top. one distinct feature you never saw on anyone else are the two faded stripes of black around the bottom, near the nape of his neck.
you鈥檙e not sober, hence why you鈥檙e so shameless checking him out and it鈥檚 long enough for him to notice.
before he could call you out or turn away from you, you shout:
鈥渃ool tats!鈥濓紙喙戔湩鈭鉁 喙戯級
鈥渨-what?鈥
鈥測our tattoos,鈥 you point to his right hand which is grabbed onto the porch鈥檚 ledge, gesturing to the tattoo starting from his wrist (that鈥檚 the start of what you can see at least) to his middle finger. 鈥渋 like them.鈥
鈥測ou do,鈥 the guy responds, quirking an eyebrow and instinctively looks down at his hand. what he says starts out as a sentence, simply repeating your words but by the end his voice lightens slightly into a question.
鈥渕hm, can i see?鈥 you take a step toward him, looking up at him with curious eyes.
who the heck is this cute drunk chick, kyoutani thinks to himself with a scoff and brief look to the side.
鈥渋 guess since you鈥檙e probably not going to leave me alone until akaashi comes back, hm?鈥
he hold his hand out for you to get a better look and you trace the ink with your fingers absentmindedly, answering softly, 鈥減robably not.鈥
you don鈥檛 notice but kyoutani鈥檚 cheeks are BURNING.
like?
yes he鈥檚 mister bad boy and i don鈥檛 care about anybody.
but having you practically hold his hand so innocently.
oh god.
鈥渨hatcha drinking?鈥 you ask, leaning over to examine the dark liquid inside kyoutani鈥檚 solo cup.聽鈥渉ennessy?鈥
鈥渘o,鈥 kyoutani quips, bringing the cup closer to his chest and away from your prying eyes.聽鈥渋t鈥檚 cola. cherry.鈥
your nose twitches at the revelation.
鈥渘ot much of an alcohol drinker?鈥
鈥渋 burn my lungs, not destroy my liver.鈥
so he鈥檚 blunt.
at least he鈥檚 picked a struggle...
鈥渉uh,鈥 you shrug,聽鈥渃an i have some?鈥
with a dark gaze, the taller man deadpans,聽鈥渁ren鈥檛 you waiting for some water?鈥
鈥渙h,鈥 you mumble dumbly,聽鈥測eah, i forgot.鈥
kyoutani rolls his eyes at you and silently prays akaashi comes back soon.
鈥渨hy cherry?鈥
with an irritated huff, he grits,聽鈥渂ecause i like it.鈥
before you can make a comment about his aggressiveness, you hear the back door slide open.聽
鈥測/n, i鈥檓 back with your water...oh hey, kyoutani鈥 akaashi returns, holding out a water bottle for you to take.
and just like that, your attention on the dark and brooding guy in front of you shifts back to your friend.
(wow y/n, priorities huh?)
you bounce over to your friend with a grin.
鈥測ou鈥檙e the absolute best, akaashi!鈥 you lunge yourself at him for a hug and he stumbles backward. he regains his balance and pats your back, giving you a pressed smile.
鈥測eah, yeah, how鈥檚 your head?鈥
鈥渂etter! the air really did it. i鈥檓 going back in now!鈥 you wave at your friend and disappear back into the house
kyoutani had watched the whole thing and he doesn鈥檛 notice the ghost of a smile across his own face.
maybe you weren鈥檛 totally annoying.
ok, you were annoying...
but...you were pretty cute, too.
鈥渟orry about her, she鈥檚 kind of a mess when she鈥檚 drunk,鈥 akaashi apologizes, rubbing the back of his neck.
it was usually him apologizing to people about your behavior and though you鈥檙e not there to witness it, you know he does it.
and that鈥檚 why you treat him to lunch often :D
鈥溾榮 fine,鈥 kyoutani grumbles, returning to his original composure. 鈥渟he just wanted to look at my tats.鈥
鈥渟ounds like her. you shoulda seen her when she saw terushima for the first time.鈥
(akaashi stop exposing y/n aljasd)
when you first met terushima, it was flirty banter between the two of you until you noticed his tongue piercing.
鈥淥H MY GOSH, AWESOME~鈥
terushima鈥檚 ego: skyrocketed
just when he was going to make a move you just:
鈥渃an i poke it? or like touch it...鈥
(y/n, you nasty)
you don鈥檛 rlly talk to terushima anymore, to your dismay.
akaashi excuses himself from the conversation and bids kyoutani a good night before walking back into the house
hm, kyoutani thinks to himself, y/n.
the next day is a monday (you maniac what the hell partying on a school night ;P) and you don鈥檛 think anyone who went to the party would recognize you...
you鈥檙e wearing an oversized hoodie and some plain sweats. the hood is over your head and covering most of your forehead while sunglasses rested on your nose.
coffee in one hand (you need all the coffee you can get) and your bag in the other, you trudge to your first class.
class was utter hell.
not only was your headache not going away after taking three advils but you couldn鈥檛 seem to keep your eyes open even with the coffee being the only thing in your veins
never party on a sunday, y/n, haven鈥檛 you said that to yourself before?
idiot idiot idiot.
the class finally finishes and the professor dismisses you and you鈥檙e one of the last people to leave the room since you鈥檙e taking forever to pack up your bag.
you鈥檙e tired, ok?
normally, you鈥檇 be your smiley self, waving at people you know and even stopping for small talk but after last night,
you just wanted to crawl back into your dark sheets and sleep for the next week.
but alas, you had the responsibilities of a student to manage.
so, you used whatever strength you had to begin walking to the library
gah, why鈥檇 i take so long, you think as you face the students walking straight toward you for their classes. now i have to face a herd.
and just when you think you鈥檝e managed to escape the herd of students, you slam into a hard chest and you reach forward, hoping whoever it was would keep you from falling backward.
鈥渨oah there,鈥 the voice murmurs, grabbing ahold of your elbow.
鈥渋 am SO sorry, i鈥檝e been such a mess today,鈥 you apologize profusely, shaking your head and clasping your hands together hoping the person wouldn鈥檛 be rude.
鈥渄rank too much last night, huh?鈥
h-huh?
鈥渦hh...what?...how did you...鈥
you look up and OH, IT鈥橲 A FAMILIAR FACE!
...you think.
鈥渨ere you at the party last night? sorry i was pretty wasted...鈥
he rolls his eyes. 鈥渢hese jog your memory?鈥 and with that he lifts a hand and wiggles his fingers at you.
he doesn鈥檛 exactly know why he indulges you since he didn鈥檛 even want to speak to you in the first place.
but he does find amusement in the way your eyes light up like a kid鈥檚.
鈥渢attoo guy! didn鈥檛 think i鈥檇 ever see you again!鈥 you instantly reach for his hand to get a better look. they definitely look scarier in the daylight but you don鈥檛 care.
you鈥檙e: fascinated.
cue kyoutani blushing again.
鈥渙i! don鈥檛 hold my hand, i was just showing you-鈥
鈥渨hat class do you have right now?鈥
and just like that, you鈥檙e in 鈥榤ake a friend鈥 mode.
your headache? disappeared.
your fatigue? gone.
鈥渄on鈥檛 have one. needed to piss.鈥
your face contorts to a sour expression as his choice of words but you brush it off and step clear of his way
鈥渨ell, then. you go on and tinkle and i鈥檒l see you around, buddy!鈥
you don鈥檛 usually say such childish terms, in fact, you find them kind of cringey, but in front of this biker looking dude, it just seemed to fit.
tinkle? kyoutani thinks to himself. oh boy, he鈥檚 so close to smiling in amusement but he鈥檒l never admit that. 鈥渂uddy?鈥 he asks instead.
鈥渂ye~鈥 you wave and skip away from him in the direction of the library
鈥渙i! you don鈥檛 even know my name!鈥
his call makes you stop in your tracks and you spin on your heels. 鈥渨ell? 鈥榶a gonna tell me or what?鈥
kyoutani feels defeated when he realized he willingly walked into that one. 鈥渒youtani,鈥 he grumbles before turning away and in the direction of the building you came from.
鈥測/n!鈥
i know, he thinks.
鈥渄idn鈥檛 ask.鈥
you grin at his response before walking back into the direction of the library.
before you could even walk a few feet, a hand is pulling you into the library.
鈥測ou were not just speaking to kentaro kyoutani,鈥 your friend and classmate whispers seriously, afraid that she was being heard
鈥測eah?鈥 you trail off, sucking in the side of your cheek in confusion, 鈥渟o?鈥
鈥渋 think he鈥檚 into some shady shit,鈥 she murmurs, linking arms with yours and pulled you with her further into the library.
you shrug in response, 鈥渋 just met him. he doesn鈥檛 seem too scary. he鈥檚 just a big guy with tattoos and piercings.鈥
鈥渢here鈥檚 a bunch of rumors about him and i don鈥檛 wanna feed into them but...be careful.鈥
you wave her off with a disinterested hand, 鈥測eah, yeah, first sign of gang membership and i dip.鈥
she rolls her eyes at your words but lets out a relieved sigh, 鈥済ood.鈥
鈥渘ow,鈥 you tightened your linked arms, 鈥渁re we going to study for bio or what?鈥
鈥渁h, you again,鈥 kyoutani sighs when you tap his shoulder excitedly and shine a bright smile his way.
the week has passed and as your friday celebration, it isn鈥檛 a surprise that you choose to go to another party.
hey, you did well on your exams. you deserve it.
you pout at his lack of happy acknowledgement but continue.
鈥渒youtani, right?鈥
鈥渕m,鈥 he hums in confirmation.聽鈥渁nd you鈥檙e y/n.鈥
鈥渢hat鈥檇 be right,鈥 you grin, moving to stand beside him and lean against the ledge.聽鈥渟o,鈥 you dramatically start, turning to face him,聽鈥渨hat鈥檚 your story?鈥
he coughs.聽鈥渕y story?鈥
you hum with an innocent nod.聽鈥渨hat鈥檙e you doing in a frat when you look like you鈥檇 rather be anywhere else in the world?鈥
the question is simple but kyoutani isn鈥檛 expecting it.
usually the first question he gets from curious girls are the tattoo stories or the tragic background stories they assume he has because of his aura.
but the frat story?
that was new.
鈥渋 have...people i went to high school with and they kind brought me into it.鈥
鈥渢hey were able to just force you?鈥 you question, perplexedly. he doesn鈥檛 look like the kind of guy who could be simply persuaded to join a fraternity. but hey, you weren鈥檛 judging.
鈥測ou鈥檇 be surprised at how forceful iwaizumi and oikawa could be.鈥
the familiar names make your eyes light up.聽鈥測ou know oikawa and iwaizumi from high school?鈥
here it comes, kyoutani thinks with an eye roll. you鈥檙e going to fish for your way into their lives and-
鈥渢hey鈥檙e so sweet, d鈥檃wh! didn鈥檛 know they could be intimidating, though,鈥 you rub your chin in thought.聽鈥渋 knew them back in middle school!鈥
鈥...you did?鈥
鈥渕hm,鈥 you muse,聽鈥渨e separated in high school unfortunately. well, maybe not unfortunately, i don鈥檛 think i鈥檇 be able to handle what i heard from them about girls flocking them wherever they went,鈥 you laugh.
鈥渋t was pretty annoying,鈥 he grumbles,聽鈥減ractice always got interrupted because of that.鈥
鈥減ractice?鈥 your eyes light up again,聽鈥渨ere you on the volleyball team with them?鈥
he can only nod.
鈥渢hat鈥檚 so cool! they told me about their games and stuff when we reconnected during our first semester. they never mentioned a kyoutani though...鈥
鈥渢hat鈥檚 because i had a stupid nickname,鈥 kyoutani huffs, feeling heat rise up his neck at the though of said nickname.
鈥渙h, what was it?鈥
鈥...mad dog.鈥
you snort,聽鈥渇itting. i鈥檓 guessing oikawa came up with that? idiot.鈥
the nickname was somewhat familiar to you, but there wasn鈥檛 enough information given to you spark any interest.
if only they told you more at the time (鈺鈺)
you thought he was pretty cute, in a weird gremlin kind of way.
but still cute聽(~藰鈻舅)~
for kyoutani, it鈥檚 refreshing hearing someone else mock oikawa instead of praise.
how has he not heard of you before? surely they would鈥檝e talked about you.
then again...he wasn鈥檛 exactly close with them in high school.
鈥渟o, i answered you,鈥 he crosses his arms,聽鈥渨hat about you? your story?鈥
you shrug,聽鈥渋 used to be a really shy girl in school and after a while, i figured out that it isn鈥檛 only because of how shy i was that i didn鈥檛 have too many friends, but also the chance that other people were too shy. so i made an effort to break out of my shell and well, now you鈥檙e stuck talking to me as a result.鈥
鈥渂ut you said you were friends with -鈥
鈥渢hat was middle school,鈥 you elaborate with a knowing smile.聽鈥渋 got shy when i reached high school since i didn鈥檛 know many people. after growing up with some of the same kids since we were five and then reaching high school where i might鈥檝e known one? it was hard to get used to.鈥
鈥渉uh.鈥
the conversation continues with you and him exchanging more questions and a part of you is delighted that he isn鈥檛 pushing you away yet.
it isn鈥檛 until one of your friends pokes her head into the back, telling you it was time to leave and your uber arrived.
鈥渨ow, 2 already,鈥 you sigh, looking down at your phone screen, slightly squinting your eyes from the brightness that contrasted from the dark. you turn to kyoutani with a soft smile. 鈥渢hanks for chatting with me!鈥
kyoutani gulps, looking down at the screen of his own phone.
did he really manage to talk to you for over two hours?
you leave before he can say bye, not that he was going to pffft, but he has a feeling it isn鈥檛 the last he鈥檚 seeing you.
and he鈥檚 absolutely right.
because every party after that one, you find yourself in the backyard, conversing with him.
he notices as months passes that you鈥檙e not bundling up on winter-wear so you鈥檙e shivering more with each passing hour.
鈥測ou鈥檙e going to get sick, y鈥檏now,鈥 he grumbles, shoving off his leather jacket.
鈥渘o, i鈥檓 n-not,鈥 you bite down on your lip in attempt to muffle your chattering teeth.
he only rolls his eyes with a sigh, a white cloud of air escaping his lips when he does, and drapes the jacket over your shoulders.聽鈥渟lide your arms through.鈥
you do as you鈥檙e told but hunch your shoulders in defeat.
the jacket is heavy and nearly swallows you whole, your hands not even able to peek out of the sleeves.
kyoutani didn鈥檛 think this through because seeing you in his jacket?
ba-thump.
鈥渋 was fine...but thanks,鈥 you murmur, lifting the sleeves and furrowing your brows when you notice you can鈥檛 see your hands.
鈥渘o problem,鈥 he mutters, turning away from you.聽鈥渋 don鈥檛 get cold easily anyway.鈥
you glance over at him and your jaw drops in admiration at what you see.
鈥渨hat?鈥 he asks when he doesn鈥檛 hear a response, averting his eyes to your star-stuck look.
鈥渋 can see your sleeve!鈥
he looks down at his own arm and nods as he shapes his mouth into an聽鈥榦.鈥
he was only wearing a white tank-top underneath his jacket so his shoulder down to his hand, specifically the tattoos, were on display for you to see.
鈥渃ool,鈥 you grin, poking at his bicep.
(big bicep)
鈥渢hanks.鈥
鈥渄o they have meanings?鈥
鈥渟ome of聽鈥榚m,鈥 he answers earnestly.聽鈥渂ut don鈥檛 expect me to go into detail.鈥
he鈥檚 half expecting you to push for answers but you don鈥檛.
鈥済ot it,鈥 you raise your hands聽the jacket sleeves in surrender,聽鈥渋 respect that.鈥
a beat passes before he says,聽鈥渢hanks.鈥
the door is pulled open behind you and you鈥檙e able to hear the booming music more clearly as it opens. 鈥測ou need some air,鈥 someone says gruffly.
鈥渋wa-chan~鈥 oikawa whines as he鈥檚 dragged out.聽鈥渋鈥檓 fine.鈥
鈥測ou鈥檙e drunk,鈥 iwaizumi corrects, crossing his arms.
鈥渉ey guys!鈥 you greet with a grin.
鈥測/n!鈥 oikawa slurs,聽鈥溾榳as won-dring where you go nowadays. ah, kentaro, nice to see you out here.鈥
he gives them a grunt as a greeting and you only roll your eyes playfully.
鈥渉ow are you guys?鈥
鈥渕eh,鈥 iwaizumi shrugs,聽鈥渂abysitting him, as usual.鈥
鈥渙f course,鈥 you stifle a laugh, watching oikawa sway and start to dance to the music playing from inside.聽
鈥渄on鈥檛 need a babysitter~鈥 he sings, but his posture says otherwise. he鈥檚 swaying, tripping over his own feet.
you鈥檝e never seen him so drunk before.
鈥渨hat the hell did he have?鈥 kyoutani mutters, nose scrunching and brows furrowing.
鈥渉e tried to impress some girl with cup pong...didn鈥檛 go so well,鈥 iwaizumi sighs, looking over at his friend.聽鈥渢he girl left with her friends anyway so he did this for no reason.鈥
鈥渙h shush,鈥 oikawa murmurs,聽鈥渟he gave me her number.鈥
鈥渨hich you won鈥檛 even use,鈥 iwaizumi finishes.
鈥渋wa,鈥 he whines,聽鈥渋t鈥檚 cold. i鈥檓 going back inside.鈥
鈥渙ika- ugh, freaking child.鈥 iwaizumi chases after him as the taller man slips from his grasp and runs back inside.
there鈥檚 another silence ensued between you and kyoutani.
you鈥檙e first to break it with your giggles filling the air.
鈥渢hey haven鈥檛 changed.鈥
kyoutani can only scoff but nod to himself. his face returns to it鈥檚 resting angry-looking one before you can see the hint of a smile.
鈥渟o,鈥 you muse, looking back to the frowning boy with innocent eyes.聽鈥渒entaro, huh?鈥
you didn鈥檛 remember his name when your friend initially warned you about him so you were glad oikawa and iwaizumi came out of nowhere to remind you.
鈥測eah,鈥 he nods.
鈥渃an i call you 鈥榯aro?鈥
he turns to you and deapans,聽鈥渘o.鈥
鈥渃鈥檓on~鈥 you pout,聽鈥渁ren鈥檛 we friends now? hey, i鈥檓 wearing your jacket.鈥
you gesture to the jacket with a pointed look.
he looks away in slight embarrassment at the fact that he did indeed give you his jacket to wear.
鈥渄o whatever you want,鈥 he shrugs simply,聽鈥渂ut i don鈥檛 like it.鈥
that wasn鈥檛 a no.聽卢鈥柯
鈥渙k, 鈥榯aro,鈥 you chirp with a cute grin.
鈥渄ummy,鈥 he mutters under his breath.
-
鈥渄o you watch the stars, 鈥榯aro?鈥 you ask one night wistfully, looking up at the dark sky, tracing patterns of stars you see with your fingers.聽鈥渋 used to be big on stars when i was little. i could鈥檝e named so many constellations.鈥
鈥渨hy does that not surprise me,鈥 kyoutani looks over at you briefly to take in your mesmerized expression toward the stars.聽鈥渂ut ah, no, not really.鈥
鈥測ou really should. especially if you need to think. i find it helps me focus,鈥 you muse, nodding to yourself.聽
he doesn鈥檛 answer you but does look over to where you鈥檙e watching.
鈥測鈥檏now,鈥 you begin with a drawl,聽鈥渋 haven鈥檛 always been this...sociable.鈥
鈥測ou鈥檝e mentioned it,鈥 kyoutani confirms, glancing back at you.聽鈥渟till find it a little hard to believe.鈥
鈥渁 lot of people do,鈥 you lightly smile in reminiscence of shy little old you.聽鈥渋 used to take a picnic blanket and walk up the tallest hill and i鈥檇 just lay it out and watch the stars at night for hours. i was always alone when i did it. so this is kinda nice.鈥
kyoutani notices your eyes never leave the sky once and for the first time he thinks he can really see you. you鈥檙e not all in his face nor bouncing around him, pestering him with pointless questions.
you鈥檙e in your element and you鈥檙e calm.
鈥渟o!鈥 you break out of your trance to clap your hands.聽鈥渨hat about you? you got a hobby?鈥
and moment ended.
鈥渘o.鈥
鈥渨hat, you don鈥檛 have any hobbies or you just refuse to tell me?鈥
鈥渘o,鈥 he repeats.
you pout but then tilt your head to the side.聽鈥渁t least i know you played volleyball. still like that?鈥
he shrugs,聽鈥測eah, i guess.鈥
鈥渙ne of these days i鈥檒l get something else out of you,鈥 you promise, crossing your arms over your chest confidently.聽鈥渢hen i won鈥檛 be the only blabbermouth between us.鈥
he鈥檇 given you some of the basic information like his major and the classes he took. you managed to figure out his birthday (long guessing game) and yes, of course you looked up his chart for him (sun sign sagittarius, you found that kind of odd). you basically learned what a stranger could learn about a celebrity on famous birthdays.
so it wasn鈥檛 exactly as personal as you would鈥檝e preferred. especially when you feel like you鈥檝e told him more about you than you have anyone else...
鈥渉ah,鈥 he actually laughs, shoulders shaking as he did 鈥 you literally did a double take because a genuine laugh? it was precious 鈥 as he also shook his head at you.聽鈥測eah, okay.鈥
鈥測ou never know!鈥
鈥渃ome join me!鈥 you grin, holding the basket for him to take a look at.聽鈥渋t鈥檚 perfect weather.鈥
you happened to run into kyoutani on your way to your favorite spot on campus, picnic basket in one hand, folded blanket under your free arm.
it was odd seeing him during the day but you seized the opportunity to hang out with him anyway.
had you been literally anyone else, he鈥檇 simply scoff at such a childish offer and bluntly reject it.
but it was you...little miss sunshine,聽always went on picnics alone,聽you.
鈥渨hy me?鈥 he asks, slightly exasperated because really? out of everyone you could鈥檝e walked into, it had to be him?
鈥渨ell, my friends are either busy or in class...鈥 you trail off,聽鈥渁nd i brought enough food for at least two people. i wouldn鈥檛 want all this food to go to waste, either.鈥
your tone and usual curious eyes at peeking away from him as if you鈥檙e ...shy?聽
pfft, can鈥檛 be. you鈥檙e never shy.
but he has been noticing you acting this way for a few weeks now...
鈥...you better have something good.鈥
he says it gruffly and quickly looks away from you as your head snaps up to meet his gaze with a bright grin.
鈥測ou鈥檙e serious?!鈥
鈥測eah...i haven鈥檛 eaten all day, that鈥檚 all. no other reason.鈥
鈥渞ight,鈥 you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. it was strange how a month ago, you felt like you could tell this guy anything without a fear of judgement but now under his piercing gaze?聽
you were somewhat afraid to say the wrong thing.
not that you should!
pfft, you鈥檝e been blurting out nonsense since the day you first met! you were a drunken mess and hey, if he鈥檚 still able to tolerate you after that, you really shouldn鈥檛 worry.
but you still do.
鈥渟o where鈥檚 your hilltop to see the stars?鈥
your cheeks warm at the fact that he remembers what you had said, recalling when you were younger.
鈥渘o stars since it鈥檚 still daylight. there is a spot on campus that鈥檚 all grass so i usually sit there to study, read or think.鈥
鈥渓ead the way then, sunshine,鈥 he gestures with his arm, currently tucked into his leather jacket鈥檚 sleeve, for you to go on ahead.
your nose scrunches at the pet name but you don鈥檛 mind it. if anything, the swirl in your stomach says otherwise.
you arrive at the patch of land, only a few students similarly scattered about. some were playing frisbee while others sat under a tree, catching up on some reading.
after settling the thick red and white blanket down on the grass, you plop onto it with a happy smile. you then move onto digging into your basket, ready to take out each plate and tupperware of food you prepared for the day.
it was really the simple things that got you to smile, kyoutani observes.
鈥測our aim sucks,鈥 he deadpans, watching as you attempt to throw a grape in the air and catch it in your mouth, only for it to fall somewhere on your blanket.
鈥渋 don鈥檛 exactly do this often,鈥 you frown.聽鈥渂esides, you can do better?鈥
鈥渂et,鈥 he nods.聽鈥渋 bet i can catch one of your shitty throws.鈥
you choke on a gasp.聽鈥渋s that a challenge? i鈥檓 sure it鈥檒l just hit you in the eye.鈥
raising an eyebrow, he moves around on the blanket so he鈥檚 facing you.聽鈥渟hoot.鈥
with slight hesitance 鈥 you鈥檙e hesitant because there鈥檚 something so domestic about the action 鈥 you lift your hand, grape settled in between your thumb and index finger, and throw it in the direction of his face.
the grape goes nowhere near his face and instead goes too far to the left but with little effort, kyoutani moves his body to the side, catching the grape in his mouth.
鈥渟ee? even with your horrible aim, i still got it.鈥
huffing, your shoulders slouch.聽鈥渟how off.鈥
kyoutani grins at your reaction, seconds later catching himself. was he actually smiling at you? at something you did?
what the hell is going on?
lunch was delicious. kyoutani fought every urge to hum in satisfaction each time he took a bite out of what you had made in your basket.
鈥渉ow鈥檚 it?鈥 you ask, looking up for a reaction.
he鈥檚 about to shrug you off and say it was okay until he makes eye contact with the hopeful gleam in your eyes.
c鈥檓on, don鈥檛 look at me like that...
鈥渋t was good. really good.鈥
a smile forms on your face at his response and you nudge the plate closer to him.聽鈥測ou can finish it if you want, i鈥檓 full.鈥
he looks between you and the plate and begrudgingly (what an actor smh) takes another squid shaped hotdog and pops it into his mouth.
by the time he finishes, the sun had made its way to the horizon, giving the sky blotches of orange, pink and purple.聽
鈥渟un鈥檚 setting,鈥 you observe, slowly blinking at the beautiful sight. it鈥檇 been a while since you were outside and watched the sunset. though, it was getting kind of chilly.
鈥渉m,鈥 kyoutani hums in confirmation, leaning back and brings his arms back behind him to support his body.
you both stay silent as your eyes stay trained on the setting sun, watching as darkness fills the night sky replacing the once light blue one.
鈥測鈥檛hink stars鈥檒l come out?鈥 kyoutani mutters, leaning back fully, resting his head on open palms he brought behind him.
鈥渕aybe,鈥 you hum with a hopeful smile.聽鈥渂ut you should probably get back to the house, right? it鈥檚 kind of late...鈥
鈥渁nd miss the possible stars show you like to gush about?鈥 kyoutani raises an eyebrow, eyes never leaving your figure.聽鈥渋鈥檓 curious now.鈥
鈥渕mkay,鈥 you shrug, moving to lay on your back beside him.聽鈥渂ut don鈥檛 fall asleep while i鈥檓 talking about them.鈥
鈥渘o promises,鈥 he hides the smile on his face well, looking away for a second.
the stars take a bit of a while to become visible as the sky is still in transition from its dark blue hue to a black one.
鈥渟o, you draw, huh?鈥 you ask.
when the man beside you nods you grin cheekily,聽鈥渨ould you draw me?鈥
鈥渘o.鈥
鈥渨hy, afraid you can鈥檛 capture all of my beauty?鈥
kyoutani鈥檚 slightly taken back by your remark. a few months ago, you would鈥檝e just pouted and drop the topic.
he was growing on you.
鈥測ou wish,鈥 he rolls his eyes. you aren鈥檛 exactly wrong, though-
鈥渙h! it鈥檚 draco!鈥
鈥渨hat鈥檚 harry potter gotta do with-鈥
鈥渘o, you dummy. the constellation!鈥 you point up.聽鈥渄o you see it?鈥
kyoutani focuses his attention to the tiny scattered white dots covering the night sky. with furrowed brows, he says,聽鈥渘o.鈥
groaning, you shift closer to him in attempt to show him better with your fingers.聽鈥渟ee the little cup like shape? and the tail that kinda wraps around?鈥
鈥渕mm, no.鈥
鈥溾榯aro,鈥 you sigh, sitting up, this time grabbing his face in your hands and pointing it in the right direction.聽鈥渢here.鈥
he鈥檚 far too aware of your hold on him to really search for the stars. as you stare up at the sky, he stares at you. the reflection of the stars is so clear, kyoutani thinks he鈥檚 hallucinating at first. he blinks. no, there they all are, in your eyes.
鈥渄鈥檡a see it now?鈥 you ask, not bothering to look over at him.
鈥...yeah,鈥 he murmurs, gulping.
his face grows cold when you let go to point out the other constellations you see. he never did find draco but he managed to spot the little dipper.
鈥測ou should get a constellation tattoo!鈥 you announce, mid search for ursa major. he had no idea what that meant until you clarified, 鈥榯he big dipper.鈥
鈥渞eally? how come?鈥
鈥渃鈥檓on, you see all this and you don鈥檛 want a constant remembrance of its beauty?鈥
鈥渨hy don鈥檛 you get one?鈥 he asks, shrugging. the idea seemed a little girly to him but perfectly suited for you since you were just about enamored with the stars.
your expression grows shy,聽鈥渋鈥檓...nervous.鈥
鈥渋t鈥檚 not that bad,鈥 he mumbles, turning his head to face yours. by now, the two of you are laying beside each other, facing each other, and only mere centimeters apart.
when did you get this close?
physically and emotionally...
鈥渟ays you,鈥 you laugh,聽鈥測ou have so many!鈥
鈥渟o?鈥
鈥測ou must be used to the pain by now.鈥
you aren鈥檛 wrong.
鈥測eah, but it鈥檚 not that bad...ok, maybe for you it鈥檒l be bad,鈥 he chuckles, watching as your face grows more fearful,聽鈥渉ey, if you ever wanna go through with it, i could take you.鈥
鈥渞eally?鈥
鈥測eah, i know a good guy,鈥 he nods.
鈥渨ill you hold my hand?鈥
there your voice goes. all bashful and quiet again.
and god, a few months ago he would鈥檝e scoffed at a reaction like that. but damn, did he want nothing more than to grab your hand right then.
鈥...fine.鈥
he鈥檚 expecting an outburst of happiness from you but instead, you scoot yourself closer to him and lean your head on his shoulder.聽鈥渢hanks.鈥
he鈥檚 grateful you鈥檙e not looking at him because his entire face and ears have gone beet red. not to mention, his heart rate is going erratically at the moment.
you鈥檙e warm against him (he鈥檚 your own personal heater uwu) and you feel yourself falling asleep.
鈥測/n, let鈥檚 get you back to your dorm,鈥 kyoutani murmurs when he hears your breaths grow shallow.聽
鈥渙kay.鈥
that鈥檚 final straw for him.
cupid might as well have shot an arrow directly into his heart, because the sound of your cute, sleepy voice? his chest aches.
you鈥檙e able to walk on your own, though you do drag your feet against the grass and pavement on the way back to your dorm.
of course, you鈥檙e shivering so once again, he gives you his jacket. it鈥檚 a comfortable weight on your shoulders and you missed the feeling of the way it draped over your body.
he shoves his hands in his pockets, watching as you enter your room. he feels somewhat out of place. the last time he was inside a dorm was when he was a freshman and not yet part of the frat.
鈥済ood night, kyou,鈥 you murmur sleepily.
鈥渢hat鈥檚 a new one,鈥 he raises an eyebrow, teasing smile twitching onto his lips.
鈥渕y bad, i meant聽鈥榯aro,鈥 you wave him off, ready to close the door.聽鈥渢hanks for spending the day with me. i know i probably forced you to but i still appreciate it.鈥
he frowns at your words, knowing he probably acts like being your friend is a chore more often than he should.
鈥済et some sleep, sunshine,鈥 he reaches over to jab a finger lightly into your forehead. you sway back at the action and smile easily. you like the nickname he had for you.
鈥渨ait, your jacket,鈥 you stop him from turning around, shrugging off the jacket. it鈥檚 heavy for just one of your arms, and he catches it before you can drop it.聽鈥渢hanks.鈥
鈥渁nytime,鈥 he replies.
it鈥檚 around one a.m., a normal time for you and kyoutani to be talking since that鈥檚 usually when you see him at parties. but here, alone outside your room, the atmosphere is so different.
maybe it鈥檚 the fact that you鈥檙e not as energetic as usual.
but a bigger part of him tells him it鈥檚 because of the weird feelings swirling around his stomach.
as he turns away from you, bidding you goodnight, he comes to realize what鈥檚 really going on with him,
and he doesn鈥檛 like it.
so he鈥檒l do what he has to stop it.
鈥渋s he outside?鈥 you grin up at akaashi who scratches his temple.
鈥測eah-鈥
鈥渢hanks!鈥 you chirp, skipping away from your friend before his hand catches your wrist.聽
鈥渂ut y/n,鈥 he warns, looking...solemn? disappointed? 鈥測ou鈥檙e not going to like what you find.鈥
furrowing your eyebrows, you shake your head.聽鈥渉uh?鈥
but before he can reply, his grasp on you falters and you manage to escape his grip.
there wasn鈥檛 much talk between you and kyoutani since your picnic date...? hangout? honestly, you鈥檙e not too sure what to label it as.
but you have a hunch that whatever you have stirring within you is what kyoutani has, too.
so you鈥檒l make a move tonight.
whether it be a cheeky flirtation and look for a reaction or a straight up confession, you鈥檒l tell him.
you just don鈥檛 know which method you鈥檒l go with.
part of you is worried about his reaction...
what if he鈥檚 just warming up to you in a friendly way?
you just managed to become a close friend and nothing more than that!
were you looking too far into things?
you continue your skip to the back door, apologizing at anyone you may have bumped into, and pull the screen door aside.
鈥渉ey 鈥榯aro!鈥 you blurt, stepping onto the patio. only, when you turn to spot him where he usually stood leaned against the ledge, he wasn鈥檛 there.聽鈥渨ha-鈥 you whirled around and oh...this is what akaashi meant...
pressed against the exterior wall of the house was kyoutani and a girl you鈥檇 never seen before.
鈥渙h,鈥 you quickly avert your gaze when they separate from each other.聽鈥渕y bad.鈥
the girl scoffs, as if mocking you,聽鈥渦m, you鈥檙e kind of interrupting?鈥
鈥渟-sorry!鈥 you profusely apologize, waving your hands in front of your face. you look up to catch his emotionless gaze.
huh.
so it did mean more to you than him.
鈥渋鈥檒l uh, just,鈥 you jab your thumb in a direction behind you,聽鈥済o now.鈥
kyoutani watches your reaction with a steady stare.
did he effortlessly allure some random girl inside to go outside with him?
yes.
and did he attempt to use said girl to erase whatever feelings he might鈥檝e had for you?
...yeah.
only, he didn鈥檛 really need you to see that...
there was a part of him which knew you were going to catch him, though.
you always greet him first and you stand outside longer than usual when months earlier you鈥檇 be inside for the entirety of the night.
so with that in mind, he mindlessly pushed away the thought of how you鈥檇 react and continued with his cruel plan.
but this is what he wanted.
what he needed.
he certainly didn鈥檛 need to fall for a dorky bubble of smiles like you.
but if this is what he needed, what he wanted, why the hell did he feel even worse than before.
he wasn鈥檛 blind to your feelings either.
he noticed your long gazes at him, the way your hand would brush against his maybe a little too often and the way you鈥檇 blush afterward.
yet still, he does this.
he can鈥檛 get a word out before you give a final weak smile and scurry back inside, sliding the door shut behind you.
鈥渁 friend?鈥 the girl coos in his ear after she watches you leave.
you slide the door closed behind you, and lean against it for a minute, reaching up to cup your cheeks with your cold hands.
you don鈥檛 know if your cheeks were flushed from the cold air or from what you had witnessed.
but the strange feeling in your stomach was definitely the effect of the latter.
鈥測/n!鈥 your other friend, bokuto, greets holding up a red solo cup,聽鈥渉aven鈥檛 seen you in forever!鈥
鈥渋鈥檝e been here. i鈥檝e just been...鈥 you trail off, looking down,聽鈥渙utside.鈥
from beside him, akaashi elbows bokuto in the stomach to which he whines,聽鈥渨hat was that for?鈥
鈥渋鈥檓 sorry, y/n,鈥 akaashi mumbles reaching for you but you retreat quickly. he knows.
鈥渘o, no! don鈥檛 apologize,鈥 you plead, looking up at them who are looking at you sadly. ugh, you wanted to wipe the frowns off their faces.聽鈥渋t鈥檚 not like...we weren鈥檛...i wasn鈥檛.鈥
of course he noticed.
just by reading your expression, akaashi can tell what you鈥檙e feeling and at times, you really hated how you wore your heart on your sleeve.
鈥渄o you wanna talk about it?鈥
鈥渘o, no! it鈥檚 fine, really. i鈥檓 fine.鈥
you quickly stride around them in hopes of finding one of your roommates.
you spend the next few hours mentally punching yourself for feeling so down when nothing was going on in the first place.
he literally said it himself.
and you thought you could what?
change that?
and how you hated that you were wondering what he was doing at that moment...
you retreat back to the main room, where you would鈥檝e been had you not met kyoutani so many months ago.
it鈥檚 crazy how one person completely changed your usual routine.
for one, the obvious one, as soon as you reached the frat鈥檚 destination, you went straight to the back porch just to say hi to your friend.
hell, you stopped drinking alcohol at these parties because you鈥檇 rather remember your conversations with the guy.
you even starting drinking cherry cola after he let you take a sip from his drink.
you really thought you knew him, or you were at least the closest to knowing him.
but you were wrong.
you were nothing but a plaything for him to tease around.
with a clenched jaw, you head straight for the beer pong table.
you don鈥檛 return to the back porch at the next party you attend. or the next one. or the one after that. and so on.
you go like you did before you knew kyoutani: just staying inside, traveling throughout the house playing games, conversing with the people you were familiar with and聽desperately聽trying to ignore聽the empty feeling in your chest.
it鈥檇 be a lie if you said you didn鈥檛 look over at the back door for a second, nearly walking out purely because of instinct.
you didn鈥檛 necessarily want to cut him off but you knew just facing him after confronting your own feelings for him would hurt more for you in the end.
meanwhile,
kyoutani stands at the usual ledge, occasionally looking behind him.
anyone could tell he was waiting for someone.
for you.
huffing, he drops his cigarette onto the ground and steps on it, smushing it with the bottom of his shoe.
it鈥檚 been weeks and you鈥檝e yet to step outside.
hell, he isn鈥檛 even sure if you鈥檝e been inside this whole time.
he shouldn鈥檛 have kissed that girl.
he shouldn鈥檛 have been so scared of his own feelings and been so stupid.
but now, he has to face the price.
unless...
鈥渇uck it,鈥 he grumbles, spinning on his heels. he yanks open the sliding door (it nearly breaks btw) and steps into the warm air.
instinctively, he face twists into a disgusted expression.
but he鈥檚 inside for a reason.
鈥渉ave you seen y/n?鈥 he asked the multiple people he passed to which they鈥檇 shrug or shake their heads.
he sighs, rubbing a hand over his face.
were you even here?
with a heavy heart, he brings a hand up to lightly tug his hair in frustration.
he won鈥檛 give up yet, though.
he scours through the sweaty crowds and in the process, a bead of sweat forms on his forehead.
it isn鈥檛 until he hears your laugh, one that he鈥檚 missed, that he knows he鈥檚 somewhere close.
鈥測/n!鈥 he calls out when he finally finds you.
you spin around in surprise and widen your eyes.聽
鈥渒youtani? what鈥檙e you doing here?鈥
鈥渋...live here-wait, 鈥榢youtani?鈥 really?鈥
鈥渋 mean inside,鈥 you deadpan.聽鈥渁nd it鈥檚 your name isn鈥檛 it?鈥
does he come clean?
lie and say he was...cold?
鈥渋 wanted to see you,鈥 he blurts.
鈥渙h,鈥 you blink, twisting your hands behind you. your friends give you a look and you nod at them as if saying聽鈥榠t鈥檚 ok, you can go,鈥 before they slip from your circle to leave the two of you alone.
鈥測eah...it鈥檚 been a while since we last talked,鈥 he acknowledges, running a hand through his short hair. you recall him talking about how it was buzzed in high school and you joked that he probably looked even scarier then.
ugh, even not talking to him, you still have the audacity to recall happy memories with him.
鈥測up,鈥 you lift your cup to your lips, taking a sip.聽
she鈥檚 angry, he thinks with a frown.聽
鈥渓ook, i鈥檓 sorry about what you saw a few weeks ago-鈥
鈥渄on鈥檛 worry about it,鈥 you say with laugh, ignoring the emerging hurt feeling bubbling in your chest.聽
鈥渋 feel like i need to explain, though.鈥
鈥渆xplain what?鈥 you smile in confusion, furrowing your brows.聽鈥測ou have your life, dude. do whatever you want.鈥
鈥渋 don鈥檛 like the way you鈥檙e talking,鈥 he murmurs under his breath so you can鈥檛 quite catch his words. dude? since when did you call him that?
鈥渉m? what was that?鈥 you turn your cheek so your ear was facing him.
鈥渘othing, nothing,鈥 he shakes his head.聽鈥渋f things are okay, why don鈥檛 you come outside anymore?鈥
鈥溾檇idn鈥檛 wanna interrupt some face-sucking,鈥 you reply bluntly, rolling your eyes.
鈥測/n, come on,鈥 he groans.聽鈥渋t鈥檚 not like that.鈥
鈥渋t isn鈥檛?鈥
鈥渘o.鈥
his voice is stern and you鈥檙e close to believing him. but you stand your ground!!
鈥渢hen?鈥 you ask again, lifting your chin and raising your eyebrows in anticipation. you did not enjoy the way your chest was aching at that moment. sighing, you lower from your high and mighty pose,聽鈥測鈥檏now what, i鈥檓 not even sure why i鈥檓 so curious. i don鈥檛 care.鈥
your last words stung.
but kyoutani wasn鈥檛 giving up so soon either.
鈥渟o all those months bugging me at these shitty parties...you don鈥檛 care then?鈥澛
his question wasn鈥檛 a genuine concern at all. in fact, he already knew your answer. because whether he liked to admit it or not, he knew you.
鈥渢hat鈥檚 not what i meant-鈥
鈥渢hen?鈥
he had turned the tables on you...
lil shit.
he鈥檚 wearing a proud smirk, watching down at you stammer over your words in reaction to his question.
鈥...well?鈥
you took a step away from him, recollecting your thoughts since he was so damn smug and curious to know.
letting out a breath of air, you snap your head up to look at him straight in the eye.
(lmao he instinctively widened his eyes and his heart skipped a beat bc holy shit, that was kinda scary...in a really cute, adorable way)
your glare is short lived though. you are standing in front of someone who puts your glare to shame.
鈥渢his may not be your intention at all but you鈥檙e hurting my feelings,鈥 you start, looking down at your shoes.聽鈥渁-and i know to you i鈥檓 some ditz who can鈥檛 seem to take a hint, but i think i鈥檝e gotten yours now.鈥
鈥測/n, that鈥檚 not what i intended.鈥
鈥渂ut that鈥檚 exactly what you portrayed. you鈥檙e here accusing me that i did this all for nothing and i don鈥檛 care. but if anything, you鈥檙e the one who doesn鈥檛.鈥
he pulls his lower lip between his teeth as he began to chew on it.
he knew you were probably angry at him for leading you on but this?
this wasn鈥檛 anger in you.
sure, you made yourself look like you鈥檙e pissed off but hearing the words tumble out of your mouth, the only emotion written on your face is sadness.
his stomach sinks.
鈥渋 actually thought we were ...friends- but y鈥檏now what? now, i don鈥檛 even know if you considered us friends. i guess we鈥檙e more like those relationships in the ocean where the little fish get leftover nutrients from the bigger fish and only one side has any benefits. what is that, mutualism? no...commensalism? yeah, i think it鈥檚 that. i鈥檓 the little fish who enjoys being around you and you鈥檙e the big fish just tolerating me there -鈥
鈥測/n, you sound crazy right now-鈥
鈥渁nd friends aren鈥檛 just supposed to tolerate each other! yes, friends do tolerate each other, but they care for one another and i鈥檝e been the only one caring this entire time, to be honest -鈥
鈥測/n, that鈥檚 not -鈥
鈥渂ecause think about it! whenever i saw you, it鈥檚 me who says hi first. hell, i鈥檓 not even sure if you鈥檝e ever seen me out in public and just chose to ignore me. not to mention, i鈥檓 always the one freezing my ass off outside just so i can talk to you at these damn parties -鈥
鈥測/n -鈥
鈥渄o you know how many people warned me about getting close to you? and i ignored them! because i thought i knew you better than they did! stupid me, i guess, for believing that -鈥
kyoutani, finally understanding that you weren鈥檛 going to let him speak while on your rant, quickly cups your face with both his hands and tries the next best thing to shut you up.
he kisses you.
his eyes squeeze shut, hoping you wouldn鈥檛 push him away and slap him, and visibly relaxes when you don鈥檛.
in fact, after a moment of you standing shell-shocked, you practically melt into him.
man, how your kiss was so different than ones he鈥檚 had in the past.
it was soft, light, delicate. everything that you were.
he was the complete opposite of you and intended on only ever associating with people who were like him or hard enough to tolerate him.
but no, you had to come along.
you and your bright eyes and childish skips.
when the two of you pull away for air, you鈥檙e in a slight daze.
鈥測ou do know me better,鈥 he murmurs sternly, never taking his hands off of your face.聽
you鈥檙e still so stunned, you can鈥檛 speak.聽
pulling away with a sigh, he lets his arms hit his sides and admits,聽鈥渋 did all that shit because i was scared.鈥
鈥渟cared?鈥 you repeat softly.
鈥渇eelings. caring... i don鈥檛 do that sh-stuff,鈥 he corrects himself this time, knowing you don鈥檛 appreciate the excessive swears.聽鈥渂ut then you happened.鈥
you frown.聽鈥渕e?鈥
鈥測eah. and i thought you were just going to be another one of those聽鈥榠 can change him!鈥 girls and give up after a while. but you stuck around...and that was weird. you chipped and chipped at my wall, patiently waiting for me and as a result, i got scared because...you were getting somewhere.鈥
you gnaw at your slightly swollen lip and look down.
鈥測ou snuck up on me, y/n. with your obnoxiously overbearing and bubbly personality, you got through to me. you became my friend,鈥 he confesses.聽鈥渁nd i鈥檓 sorry for what i did, really. i thought i was doing it so i wouldn鈥檛 be weak because i realized i was starting to care for you, too. if i鈥檓 being honest, i had a hunch you had a thing for me and i think as soon as i admitted to myself that i was developing a thing for you, i just...i did the wrong thing. kissing that random chick in hopes of forgetting about my feelings was the weak choice.鈥
you don鈥檛 think you鈥檝e ever heard him be so vulnerable and open about his feelings before.
it makes your heart swell in your chest.
鈥渨ell,鈥 you begin in a small voice, interlocking your fingers and slowly looking up at him,聽鈥測ou鈥檙e lucky i鈥檓 a forgiving person.鈥
a smile, a genuine smile spreads on his face and his eyebrows lift slightly.
鈥測eah?鈥 he muses, squeezing your hand.聽
鈥渕hm,鈥 you hum, smiling up at him.聽鈥渂ut you have a lot to make up for...鈥
鈥測/n, you鈥檒l never be alone to count the stars again.鈥
your heart just about leaps out of your chest at his promise. you nod softly, a shy smile making it鈥檚 way on your face.
鈥渟o, can you call me聽鈥榯aro now?鈥
鈥渁h, so you do like the nickname!鈥
鈥渃oming from you...鈥 he trails off, smirking at your grin,聽鈥渕aybe.鈥
a star tattoo wouldn鈥檛 be so bad, kyoutani thinks as he watches your face brighten. the only issue is that no tattoo would ever come close to the stars in your eyes that he could get lost in.
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woozisnoots6 months ago
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svt in college! | alex edition
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掳 pairing: ot13 x reader 掳 genre: fluff(?), what my stream of consciousness finds funny, college!au 掳 word count: 1034 掳 warning:聽slightttt violence 掳 a/n: i know i have requests to write >< but i really needed to write smth fun :( act as a shot of of serotonin into my veins ahahaha [insert fratboy emoji] disclaimer tho - this was ENTIRELY SELF INDULGENT and very very catered to me which is why vernon鈥檚 is unnecessarily long SO IM SORRY !!! i still hope you guys think its fun :D
掳 masterlist!聽
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seungcheol: a business major, minoring in international relations. has the slightest crush on you but suppresses it pretty well without you realizing because he knows you like someone else. he likes to take you on what he calls bestie dates to a nearby arcade or places to eat when you鈥檙e stressed.
jeonghan: a psych major, minoring in communications, whom you oddly spend a lot of time with because he asks for homework help every other day when you鈥檝e only taken 1-2 psych classes in your entire life :P but he鈥檚 a good listener and subs in as therapist on the weekdays so you let him stick around.聽
joshua: an english major. doesn鈥檛 know why and slightly regrets it but if it means he can keep the tinie bookshelf he has in his doom to make it look like he鈥檚 smart, then that鈥檚 motivation to keep him going. you tolerate him because you guys randomly go on trips at 2am and buys you food :D
jun: a childhood education major. the friend of a friend of a friend of someone鈥檚 cousin that happen to be your friend and so you see him at parties sometimes :) actually really fun to be around when you鈥檙e not too much into the party scene and play hopscotch or bean bag toss outside the persons鈥 backyard.聽
soonyoung: the loud dance team captain that won鈥檛 give you 5 minutes of quiet time waiting for your chem professor to open the door to the lab room because he has his speakers on at max volume dancing to kelly clarkson,,,, he鈥檚 pretty chill otherwise, he鈥檚 in my math class. claims hes the eye of the tiger when he comes to class in leopard print
wonwoo:聽premed that鈥檚 somehow taking enough classes to graduate with a literature minor. he and cheol talk a lot because they鈥檙e in the same broadcasting club or something of the sort. you guys acknowledge each other鈥檚 presence and share a moment of tea together sometimes with cheol.
jihoon:聽double majoring in music composition and theory. says he absolutely hates it because he thinks the work he does is completely pointless. but then goes on to write you聽like 27484737 love songs within a week for a single assignment. denies to other people that you鈥檙e his best friend and that he hates your guts but you鈥檙e the only one allowed in his private studio on school days and can fiddle with his equipment sometimes :3
minghao:聽an art major minoring in history. eventually wants to be a gallery director so he can hold his own. you make him drag you everyone for his work when you鈥檙e bored or have free time bc he takes pictures for the school newspaper/website. you guys strike a negotiation that you drive and he buys snacks.聽
mingyu:聽you only know him for playing in your uni鈥檚 (american) football team. his tall ass is like linebacker or some shit you don鈥檛 even know his major. you had to take a kickboxing class for PE credit and you swept him to the ground and put him a choke hold. you never let him live that down everrr. you also steal his lunch money from his bag when he鈥檚 at practice.
seokmin:聽a musical theatre major, minoring in music composition. you guys met through jihoon. you were absolutely FLOORED when you heard him sing as the lead for the school鈥檚 spring musical. it is now tradition that you guys get crepes after every show and make jihoon pay B) he hangs out with you and jihoon a lot and randomly make music together. and ahahaha people think jihoon and seokmin are fighting over you!! >:( that鈥檚 absolutely preposterous, seokmin is too good of a soul (you say this as you help him kneed dough for the pizza you guys are making together)
seungkwan:聽an education major, minoring in music because he wants to teach music to little kiddos ^-^ THE BESTEST OF THE BESTIES!!! like if you鈥檙e not hanging out with jihoon/seokmin or cheol, you crash at seungkwan鈥檚 apartment and raids his kitchen when you run out of groceries ;D he keeps making fun of you for your car until you remind him that he can鈥檛 drive. on the weekends, you guys love to bake muffin, cookie, or cake recipes to prep for the daycare on mondays :3
vernon:聽okay actually, he doesn鈥檛 go to college SHDJSJSHS you met him on the side of the road once when you decided to walk instead of using your car (silly you!) and you saw vernon doing some cool graffiti art (IT WASN鈥橳 VANDALISM!!!). which was a total coincidence because at that point, you were ready to take a bus and wait right at the bus stop where he set up. since it was a long wait, you guys talked and he kept you company. you learn that this is actually a big project he鈥檚 been working on and is finally getting paid big bucks for something he really likes doing. you learn that he鈥檚 a great conversationalist and you miss the bus first bus ride home and have to wait another hour or so whoops! this becomes more and more of a daily thing, slowly getting to know each other. fast forward months later and it鈥檚 your birthday :D and you don鈥檛 expect anything at all because how would he know, you don鈥檛 really like your birthday anyways UNTIL vernon surprises you with a spray paint drawing of your favorite animal! and then asks you out on a date and you guys fall deeply in love
chan:聽a linguistics major. yeah, he doesn鈥檛 know why either, he鈥檚 just rolling with it. says he鈥檚 liking it so far, but no one really knows if he鈥檚 lying or not, including yourself. you drag chan to college events like club fairs and rallies because you鈥檙e too embarrassed to go alone and no one else wants to go LOL he begs you to drive him places during your three day weekends because he always wants to go off campus and do stuff with you and the guy pals, but he doesn鈥檛 like the freeway :/ its fine though because he pays for gas.聽
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square-blunt3 months ago
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The hardest part of this is leaving you
Hey so i don't know if y'all remember this fic bc i sure do and i wanted to magnify one part of that which was Scott's bit. It's flower husbands angst. And it emotionally scared me to write this. also yea that's a my chem lyric as the title once a killjoy always a killjoy sue me.
TW- MCD (major character death), sacrifice, Gore, (blood/bleeding out), Angst, 3rd life mentioned. WC: 1288 words Ao3: p a i n
The first rule of battle, at least as Jimmy was taught, was to never be caught off guard. But he thinks he can get away with it just this once. Cradling Joel's heavy head in one hand, holding tight into Lizzie's cold arm with his other, he grieves. His grief overrides his guard. He's even got the cod head off. He can't get more vulnerable than this. He's alone, without allies. Katherine was nowhere to be seen, Gem was on the other side, Scott- Scott was Scott. He wasn't on Jimmy's side, he was against Sausage.
That was different.
Jimmy couldn't trust Scott as an ally, only as an enemy to his enemy.
He couldn't put trust in him.
Everyone he put trust in is dead.
He doesn't even trust himself.
He's surrounded, body and soul, by people who could easily kill him. Those who wouldn't-
The whistle of an arrow cuts his mind's voice in two.
Jimmy turns away from the noise, looking down at Joel's face.
He smiles.
The arrow finds its target with that familiar, sickening crunch.
He knows the piercing sting of an arrow, enchanted, imbued, or not.
He knows the pain that accompanies the sound.
Why, then, did Jimmy not feel it?
He looks up, eyes catching on the arrow before the face of his savior. The arrow is lodged in the side of their neck, in the break of their armour. The white and gold collar peeking up is already stained with red, turning the fabric into a bright crimson.
There's the sound of a sword thumping against dirt and rock. Of armour clinking against itself. The Codfather is hyper aware of the wind, how it sounds, the smell it carries. The smell of blood. Jimmy stands up, much too quickly, his vision blurring, but he races forward anyways to catch the man that saved his life.
In his arms, he holds Scott.
Scott's breathing is rapid and irregular, Jimmy desperately looks on himself and on Scott for any potions that might help, but he freezes when he feels Jimmy's hand cover his own.
"Sc- Scott?" Jimmy whispers. There's no need, there's no one around them- alive to hear it, at least.
"D- don't-'' Scott murmurs out, taking in a deep breath that makes his face contort with pain.
"What- Scott- Why? You took that arrow for me- why?" Jimmy asks.
"You really don't remember then-" Scott says, voice fizzling out onto coughing. Jimmy shifts to help him become more comfortable. If Scott had nothing to help, or didn't want to be helped, then Jimmy wouldn't take anything away from him.
"Remember- I don't really- I thought you hated me-" Jimmy can't remember anything from before鈥 this, waking up in the jungle, sore from sitting on the cobble throne, alone. Once he got set up, he felt a strong pull to Joel, who turned out to be one of his closest allies, but to Scott as well, but when Scott never showed that they were close friends, Jimmy just鈥 let it go. Until now at least. Scott, hand shaking, reaches up to cup Jimmy's face. Jimmy helps him, pressing his face into Scott's palm- cold. His hand is so cold.
"You were my voice. It's funny, I- I got shot in the neck- you got shot in the head. I was your mind," Jimmy laughs lightly, sounds like him alright, "and you were my voice." Scott sounds so quiet, and far away, like it's taking any strength he has left to tell him this.
"I- wh- whatever happened, Scott, I'm so sorry I let you down now. You deserved so much better than what I could've given you and I'm so sorry- please- let me- there has to-" Jimmy says, gripping Scott's hand tighter. Jimmy doesn't remember what Scott's talking about, but he remembers feeling something. Almost as if this was a repeat of Scott's memories, but the roles being reversed. Jimmy wonders if he died in Scott's arms. That's what he asks. Scott can't help but smile.
"No, I couldn't get to you in time. But you looked so beautiful that day, and even still when I went back for you." Scott runs a weak thumb across Jimmy's cheek, bringing his attention to tears that had formed. "Don't cry, morning glory, I couldn't bear to see you die again."
"Again- Scott- I-" Jimmy parrots, before Scott cuts him off, Jimmy immediately lets him speak.
"You have nothing to be sorry-" Scott coughs again, blood staining his lips, Jimmy's eyes stinging. "-about. I thought if I avoided you, you'd be safe, but- I can't live without you, Jimmy. You still mean everything to me, hyacinth, and I- ugh-" Scott stops and huffs, Jimmy can tell he's still him. Under the shaky breaths, and the red, white and gold- he can see that it's still the snarky, sarcastic Scott he'd spent another life with. "It's cold. I don't remember it being this cold-" Jimmy immediately curls around Scott, trying to warm him up- keep his blood going, good god, trying to keep his blood going.
"Why did you do this? Why?" Jimmy whispers hoarsely.
"Because I loved you. I still do, Jimmy, My rose, I still- do鈥" 'Scott murmurs, voice fading out- no, no- Jimmy just- Scott's just told him this and he knows Scott is telling the truth- he knows- he also thinks some part of him鈥 still-
"You loved me?" Jimmy says, kissing the inside of Scott's palm, a part of him still loves Scott, too.
"Jimmy? Jimmy, are you there? Are you- I- I can't-" Scott says, voice fragile, panicking.
"Scott, Scott, I'm here, Scott- Scott- I'm here, Scott please-" Jimmy says, cupping Scott's face with one hand, and holding Scott's to his with his other hand. He can feel his pulse under his fingertips, its beating, but getting weaker, he can't- Jimmy can't lose him- not after he just got him back- he can see flashes, flower forests, cows, starlit skies- nights awake, much longer than they should be, talking, and laughing. He can see a ring in his hands, Scott's surprised, but overjoyed face- and he remembers the way he felt when Scott said yes. He feels the warm ghost of a hand on his shoulder. He can't- Jimmy just got him back- "Scott- please? I remember now- I do- Scott, poppy, please- I- I remember- no- no, no, no- Scott don't- don't you dare- don't you dare- Scott please-" Jimmy can't feel Scott's pulse anymore. He lets Scott's hand slide from his to cradle both sides of Scott's face. He wipes the blood away from around the side of his mouth. Tears stinging his eyes again, his chest and throat growing tight- why, why did Scott do that? "You- why- why, why, why, why, why? Scott," Jimmy chokes back a sob, and lets his head hang, "I was supposed to be the one to die for you, not the other way around- why, stupid, beautiful, selfless, why? Daffodil, sunflower, starshine, why- I just got you back- please- it's it's not- i- it's not fair-" he sobs again, ugly and brutal, nothing like Scott, nothing like Scott, "I just- how- why are you being ripped away from me again- you- i- we- we could've left, we could've- you and me- we could've left and made something because we were alive again- I don't- I can't- Scott- I'm so sorry-" his body shakes, he can't take it- knowing their past together, and now have to face his future without him- it was-
Maybe he wouldn't have to live without him much longer.
There's a sword tip pointed at the back of his head.
And just inside his vision-
Gem.
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twstarchivesa year ago
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Idia Shroud銉籚oice Lines
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Additional Voice Lines
Star Send-Off Garments event card
Scary Dress event card
School Uniform - R
Unlock Card 鈥淚 want to live quietly, in private, without anyone ever noticing me...鈥
Groovy 鈥淎h, my relax time keeps getting pushed back...鈥
Home Setting 鈥淎hh, not feeling it...鈥
Home Transitions 鈥淐alling out to an antisocial like me with that uniform on and a smile on your face... Hah~ Gotta hand it to you!鈥
鈥淐lasses? I-I don鈥檛 go to the classrooms; I take classes using my tablet. Leave me alone.鈥
鈥淲here鈥檚 Ortho? Ee! When did you get there? M-M-My little brother didn鈥檛 come back from his prowl鈥擨 mean, his walk...鈥
Home Transition (Login Greeting) 鈥淗-Hello. Sorry, I鈥檓 really a total buzz kill. Could you just pretend I鈥檓 a worthless worm and act like I鈥檓 not here?鈥
Home Taps 鈥淕enerally I hate talking face-to-face, but if I鈥檓 playing a BG... What, you don鈥檛 know what BG means? It stands for聽鈥榖oard game鈥...鈥澛犅
鈥淓e! Wh-What are you doing...?! D-D-Did I do something?! Am I annoying you just by breathing?!鈥
鈥...What? You can look at me like that all you want, but small talk is so insanely difficult for me; I just can鈥檛 do it...鈥
鈥淐lassrooms make me uncomfortable. Especially when Cater starts giving me a hard time with that outgoing aura of his 鈥榗ause he can鈥檛 realize I鈥檓 not interested鈥擨 hate it, I hate it...鈥
鈥淣ononono, I really can鈥檛 handle your energy. I鈥檓 not capable of getting all excitable like you.鈥
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PE Uniform - R
Unlock Card 鈥淭his sucks. What鈥檚 the point of getting exercise?鈥
Groovy 鈥淚 thought of a way to get out of having to play. W-Want me to tell you...?鈥
Home Setting 鈥淭his is so hard...鈥
Home Transitions 鈥淲ait, you鈥檙e really full of energy.聽C-Could you take this class instead of me? I-I-It鈥檚 fine, really, no one鈥檚 gonna notice a thing!鈥
鈥淚鈥檓 so done with this. I鈥檓 out of shape. Also I got some moussaka caught in my throat so I think I wanna聽go sit down somewhere.鈥 虏
鈥淚 mean, anyone can do sports if they try. I could聽do them. I just refuse to even attempt them.鈥
Home Transition (Login Greeting) 鈥淟iterally the worst. Someone obliterate all classes where they make you work outside already.鈥
Home Taps 鈥淚鈥檓 starting to think Coach Vargas speaks an entirely different language. Maybe I鈥檇 understand him if I took Animal Lang before Flying?鈥
鈥淭he only one who can keep up with me during Flying is Azul, surprisingly.鈥
鈥淲alking and flying are hella annoying. I鈥檓 trying to think what the specs would be to let me ride on Ortho鈥檚 back.鈥
鈥淥nly humans would come up with the idea of doing pointless exercise just to use up nutrients they鈥檝e already taken in. It鈥檚 all complete BS!鈥
鈥淪top it. I really don鈥檛 have the energy for this right now. Leave me alone...鈥
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Lab Coat - SR
Unlock Card 鈥淪hh! I鈥檓 concentrating. Stop talking to me.鈥
Groovy 鈥淚-I want to stay true to my curiosities...鈥
Home Setting 鈥淵-Y-You have a question for me?! Please no.鈥
Home Transitions 鈥淥h~? You鈥檙e struggling with the questions published in that textbook? Really? The basics of the basics?鈥
鈥淲ant me to help you with your work? Let me touch Grim鈥檚 fluffy fur first, then we鈥檒l talk.鈥
鈥淓very time I run into Crewel he tells me聽to stop slouching like a cat鲁 and straightens my posture for me. I can鈥檛 stand dog people. But I do like dogs.鈥
Home Transition (Login Greeting) 鈥淓veryone starts relying on me all of a sudden during moments like these. 3D people really are something...鈥
Home Transition (Groovy) 鈥淭-Tests and games are kind of similar. I mean like, the higher your score, the better it makes you feel...鈥
Home Taps 鈥淚t鈥檇 make things so much easier if we could just access the library and the botanical garden from our dorms. They鈥檙e too far to get to from my room.鈥澛犫伌
鈥淓-E-Engineering is more my field, so... i-if you have questions about chem, you should probably ask someone else...鈥
鈥淚鈥檝e invested all of my skill into Ortho. And I need to keep researching so that he doesn鈥檛 start to break down.鈥
鈥淭here鈥檚 actually a lot of people in the science club. ...Meanwhile the board game club is quiet and almost no one鈥檚 there, so that was my only option.鈥
鈥淵ou really have no chill. ...You鈥檙e not that good at labs, are you? Hehe!鈥
Home Tap (Groovy) 鈥淚f technology鈥檚 advanced enough, sometimes you can鈥檛 even distinguish it from magic... I mean, I鈥檝e maxed out in both, though.鈥
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Ceremony Robes - SR
Unlock Card 鈥淚 hate crowded places. Leave me alone...鈥
Groovy 鈥淣ow that the internet鈥檚 so advanced, why are we still having ceremonies offline...?鈥
Home Setting 鈥淚t鈥檚 not going to hurt anyone if I鈥檓 not there.鈥
Home Transitions 鈥溾業gnihyde students, eyes on your dorm leader!鈥 ...I鈥檇 die if I ever had to say that. I鈥檓 leaving as soon as I find Ortho.鈥
鈥淚 feel everyone staring at me... T-They鈥檙e gossiping about me, aren鈥檛 they?! I know they are!鈥
鈥淲hy can鈥檛 they just livestream the ceremony these days? It鈥檚 so stupid wasting all this time and energy just to have everyone in one place.鈥
Home Transition (Login Greeting) 鈥淚-I see people everywhere I go... Ee! L-Let me take a break here.鈥
Home Transition (Groovy) 鈥淲hy are there so many outgoing kids at a school that has such an emo name? You鈥檙e the only one I can trust, since you鈥檙e introverted like me.鈥
Home Taps 鈥淭here鈥檚 really no point to traditions. We all need to keep updating so we can keep up with technology.鈥
鈥淲iddle Wucius looks so adowabwy ugwy wike aw-ways~ With your squishy... paw pads.... ...! You saw...鈥
鈥淒oesn鈥檛 it ever feel like someone鈥檚 watching you in the Mirror Chamber even when there鈥檚 no one there? ...I鈥檓 joking, hehe!鈥
鈥淎h, I鈥檓 so nervous... I鈥檝e never been good with crowds.鈥
鈥淪o typical of the eager, innocent youth... Do they think I can handle this all of a sudden?!鈥
Home Tap (Groovy) 鈥淚鈥檓 jealous of how empty your dorm is. I wish it was just me and Ortho in a dorm and no one else...鈥
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Birthday Celebration Outfit - SSR
This card was only obtainable during Idia鈥檚 birthday event (Dec 17 - Dec 23, 2020).
Login on Birthday 鈥淲hat is it? I鈥檓 busy getting my favorite characters鈥 birthday voice lines right now... Celebrating in real-life is reserved for family only. ...Huh? You鈥檙e here for to throw my birthday party? Y-You? Eee...! C-Could you please notify me in advance when you鈥檙e having advanced-level events like that!? I was caught off-guard and I鈥檓 unarmed!鈥
Unlock Card 鈥淒ozens of people celebrating for me... This is a cursed event for a shut-in...鈥
鈥淗ah... I鈥檓 the birthday boy but I鈥檓 not that excited about this. Let鈥檚 cancel the party today. Okay, everyone leave~鈥
Groovy 鈥淭h-Thx for celebrating for me... Huh? You don鈥檛 know what that means? What about Tks? 10Q? TY!?鈥 鈦
Home Setting 鈥淒on鈥檛 only normies have fun wearing party clothes?鈥
Home Transitions 鈥淚f I use my birthday as an excuse, could I make my dream of petting Sir Grim a reality? Hehe! M-Maybe I should ask...鈥
鈥淪ir Azul gave me a cup as a gift, like one you鈥檇 see at fancy restaurants. Does it even match my room?鈥
鈥淪ir Cater came up to me saying 鈥楲et鈥檚 take a birthday pic for the memories!鈥 Overly-friendly extroverts are scary. I want to go back to my room right now...鈥
Home Transition (Login Greeting) 鈥淭here has to be some sort of catch if you鈥檙e actually celebrating my birthday. I-Is this a scheme to give me false hope? A sign that a depressing event is starting? Ee!鈥
Home Transition (Groovy) 鈥淭-Time! I can't be around this many people anymore. Take me somewhere without anyone around, now!鈥
Home Taps 鈥淥ne time, our parents got mad at Ortho and I after we took apart a game console they got me for my birthday. But I swear we were going to put it back together right after...鈥
鈥淪ir Malleus鈥 present... The Diasomnia students were so formal when they brought it to me; I thought something was wrong...鈥
鈥淗aving a birthday is the same thing as losing a year of life... I can鈥檛 understand the people who get so excited about it.鈥
鈥淚 went shopping earlier and Sir Sam told me聽鈥楬ere鈥檚 an extra something for your birthday.鈥 H-He... gave me some snacks...! He鈥檚 a nice man...鈥
鈥...I-I鈥檓 sending out all these聽鈥榣eave me alone鈥 vibes, but you can鈥檛 read the room at all... You must not have friends, huh?鈥
Home Tap (Groovy) 鈥淚鈥檓 a year older鈥攍evel up! I鈥檝e overcome my social awkwardness~! ...No, I haven鈥檛. Well, at least the party wasn鈥檛 as bad as I thought it鈥檇 be.鈥
Duo Magic Idia: Eek, Sir Floyd!? Alert: extrovert approaching... Floyd: Happy birthday, Firefly Squid.
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Take His Hand 鈥淗i... So can I go back now?鈥
Lv Up 鈥淕aining lots of EXP... Heheh!鈥
鈥淟eveling up is crucial.鈥
鈥淒um duh-duh-duh-duuum!聽鈾 Level up!鈥
Max Lv Up 鈥淗-Hey... I reached my max level, right? So I don鈥檛 have to work so hard anymore, right?鈥
Episode Lv 鈥淪ometimes I see characters with weird level-up gauges I鈥檇 be interested in challenging myself with. ...I鈥檓 talking about you.鈥
Magic Lv Up 鈥淎hh, I could power up my magic all I want but it won鈥檛 bring me any good in real life. Hah.鈥
Limit Break 鈥淚-Is there something fun about paying attention to me? ...Don鈥檛 grin like that... Weirdo.鈥
Groovy 鈥淚鈥檓 getting pumped up! The whole universe is out there waiting for me! ...鈥橩ay, the spark鈥檚 gone now; back to normal again...鈥
Lesson Select 鈥淚 hate outdoor classes... I hate outdoor classes...鈥
鈥淚 can still study even if I don鈥檛 go to class... Why do we have to do it in person?鈥
鈥淧-People have been staring for a while now. Pick already! Go!鈥
Lesson Start 鈥淓e! ...There鈥檚 so many people.鈥
Lesson End 鈥淭hat鈥檚 enough class for an entire week.鈥
Battle Start 鈥淚鈥檒l finish this in 1 turn.鈥
Battle Win 鈥淚 wasn鈥檛 done grinding~鈥
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Other
Profile Quote 鈥淚鈥檓 better suited for dark and gloomy places. So please, can you just leave me alone?鈥
January 2020 Trailer 鈥淥h, so you鈥檙e the problem child I鈥檝e heard all about. But as long as you stay away from me, I don鈥檛 care.鈥 鈦
Countdown Poster 鈥淭he fact that you鈥檙e here in a place like this... It seems like you鈥檝e been abandoned by the Goddess of Fate.鈥
Login Bonus 鈥淕etting login bonuses not just on online games but by showing up at school too kind of gives me a little motivation...鈥
Player Birthday Wish 鈥淒on鈥檛 you hate being wished a happy birthday by people you barely know? You get presents you don鈥檛 care about, and then you gotta react to them... Huh? It鈥檚 not like that for you? Er... Oh. Th-Th-Then... uh... h-h-h-hap-happy b-b-birthday...鈥
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1.聽What, you don鈥檛 know what BG means? It stands for board game...
The abbreviation Idia uses here is聽鈥渂odoge鈥 which stands for聽鈥渂odogemu.鈥 There鈥檚 no English equivalent for the shortened 鈥渂odoge鈥 so I went with its initials for this line.
2. I got some moussaka caught in my throat
This is a cameo from Hercules, mirroring Hades鈥 line:聽鈥淵ou know, I haven't been this choked up... since I got a hunk of moussaka caught in my throat!鈥
3. Stop slouching like a cat
Crewel鈥檚 quote聽actually reads as 鈥淔ix your slouching shoulders,鈥 here, but the word for 鈥渟louching shoulders鈥 literally translates to聽鈥渃at back鈥 (nekoze). To make Idia鈥檚 next comments make more sense, I reworded this to include the pun.
4.聽 ...if we could just access the library and the botanical garden from the dorms
I took some liberties with translating this line so I鈥檇 like to leave a note for it. Literally, this line translates to聽鈥淚t鈥檇 be easy if the library and the dorm came to me from somewhere,鈥 but the nuance here is 鈥淚f the library and botanical garden were right here (ie. able to be accessed from my current location [my room], probably digitally), then there鈥檇 be no need to actually go to them in person, which make things easier.鈥
I think it鈥檚 better to make this a little clearer in English, so I rephrased it.
5. What about Tks? 10Q? TY!?
He lists various net slang terms for 鈥渢hank you.鈥 I substituted with English terms. The originals were 銉堛兂銈偣銉汇偟銉炽偓銉勩兓397.
6. So you鈥檙e the problem child I鈥檝e heard all about
This is a direct line from Hercules, but it鈥檚 exclusive to the Japanese dub. The English dub鈥檚 version says 鈥淎h! There鈥檚 the little sunspot, little snootchie.鈥 For obvious reasons I couldn鈥檛 include the cameo as it鈥檚 said in English 馃槀
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slipperyskella year ago
Note
Spare mason head canons? Any spare mason head canons for the poor? (This is nuka world blues btw also hi I love your art)
howdy howdy howdy, i have many headcanons for sale
okay so!聽
already p well established, but he鈥檚 an absolute fucking unit聽
Prolly one of the only people who鈥檚 taller than Gage (who I hc is like... 6鈥1鈥 or so)聽
I鈥檓 talking like 6鈥7鈥陈
300 lbs at least, prolly more tho
he will bend you into a pretzel聽
also he鈥檚 that healthy kinda muscular where you can tell he鈥檚 absolutely fucking ripped but there鈥檚 a healthy layer of fat over it like there鈥檚 supposed to be聽
he ain鈥檛 really tech savvy specifically when it comes to computers, but he鈥檚 a lot smarter than he lets on when it comes to people聽
and weaponry, for that matter
i mean those predator grenades he gives you at the end of the Nuka-World questline (assuming you let the pack live)? He straight up says he was the one who made them after messing around with some tech he found on a couple of Ops鈥檚 corpses. Which he killed, I might add聽
that being said though, i actually HC he may have come from a vault. which one? I have no idea. But he got real fuckin tired of vault life and headed out as soon as he could before stumbling into the pack. None of em thought he鈥檇 be shit at first but they still let him in, and look where he鈥檚 at now?聽
now to be clear there ain鈥檛 any bits of evidence in game of him being a vaultie being the case - this is my own take. Only reason i say it might be is simply considering the fact that so many people would be small and malnourished because of the harsh wastes. Meanwhile, we have Mason (and Cito, though that鈥檚 a can of worms in of itself) who鈥檚 tall as fuck and built like a brick shit house to boot聽
So if you wanna go that route you can but you don鈥檛 have to聽
ANYWHOOSIES
i like to think he鈥檚 the chaotic neutral, airing on evil version of Hancock聽
let鈥檚 his people do what they want, but he鈥檚 in charge, they know that, and will be reminded if they need to be聽
speaking of Hancock, his romance (if mason had one >:鈥) ) would be a chaotic neutral airing on evil version of Hancock鈥檚, too. Puts up that cocky persona so people don鈥檛 fuck with him or you, but v much turns into a softy when he鈥檚 around you.聽
prolly just as if not more horny tho let鈥檚 be real
Surprisingly playful, likes to tease - will call you a shithead for fun聽
he will give you noogies - it鈥檚 going to happen, you鈥檙e just gonna have to deal
honestly? I think he鈥檚 bi
drinks he respec women juice (honestly the level of misogyny i鈥檝e seen from Mason content, namely fic, is rather alarming since there鈥檚 nothing in game even suggesting he鈥檇 be that way (aside from him calling Mags a bitch, and that鈥檚 when she and her brother riot and take over the power plant if it鈥檚 the ops that get fucked over, which imo is justified)聽
like there鈥檚 literally nothing saying he鈥檇 treat em any less and it bugs me just how many people think he鈥檇 act that way聽
anywhoosies tho
very much the youngest of the bosses tho - i鈥檓 talkin like mid to late twenties聽
it鈥檚 implied in game that he may or may not have actually killed the previous alphas before taking their place (mags mentions she鈥檚 looking evidence for it iirc), and while i wouldn鈥檛 entirely put it past him to do so, i like to think the tarring and feathering is what did the previous alphas in聽
which isn鈥檛 a good thing considering you鈥檙e specifically not supposed to kill the alphas when challenging them, only strip them of their rank and exile them聽
in game his bed is just a pile of pillows by his terminal, which like... valid
but also consider: his bedroom being in a dressing room in the back stage of the amphitheater, separate from everyone else鈥檚. lots of fun string lights, plenty of mirrors so he can look at himself while he鈥檚 putting on his face paint for the day, the works聽
still has his glorified pile of pillows, but also a hammock that he LOVES napping in if he ain鈥檛 got shit to do (which is very rare all things considered). maybe a beanbag chair聽
will use rifles n the like if he has to, but he鈥檚 much more a fan of shotguns and melee weaponry.聽
for some reason this makes me think of the Psychos from Borderlands
perhaps Krieg?聽
just... absolutely feral/violent on the battlefield聽
ain鈥檛 afraid to play dirty if he has to, though normally he ain鈥檛 one to let himself get into that position in the first place if he can help it聽
doesn鈥檛 really fuck with chems or booze, but might have some jet or daytripper if he鈥檚 having a REALLY bad day
gotta keep sharp yo聽
that being said, he actually ends up being the designated trip sitter half the time during parties n shit聽
which the pack has a lot of聽
he doesn鈥檛 mind, really - but they owe him if it鈥檚 a surprise tripsitting聽
His voice is a bit raspier than it actually is since he鈥檚 gotta pull out the Commanding voice to make sure people and animal alike are put back in line聽
which, considering the state the previous alphas left the pack in, he鈥檚 gotta do it a lot聽
he loves his pack, he really does, but jesus fucking christ聽
honestly tho, despite him having to bare his teeth as much as he has to to make sure people are doing what they鈥檙e supposed to do, he鈥檚 surprisingly hard to actually piss off.聽
though if you do piss him off? good luck聽
you鈥檙e absolutely fucking screwed
hates seafood of all kinds - thinks it tastes gross聽
if he HAS to eat it he will ofc, but he will bitch聽
much prefers land meats聽
namely lamb (if that鈥檚 a thing which i assume it is) and radstag. he does love a good gamey taste聽
certainly ain鈥檛 gonna pass up a bramhin steak, that being said聽
definitely works out, be it deliberately or through whatever he鈥檚 doing on his day to day聽
I鈥檒l prolly have more in the future about mason or the pack in general (or honestly just nuka world shit since my hyperfixation has shifted back to nuka time now) but this is what i got so far聽
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pardondoyouhavejamsa year ago
Text
Can We Just Talk?
Pairing: Gender neutral!Y/N x childhood bestfriend!Taehyun
Word Count: 4.3K
Genre: Angst, fluffy ending, best friends to lovers AU! Highschool!AU
Warnings: Mild cursing, some bullying, also I didn鈥檛 proofread :P
Synopsis: Growing up with Taehyun by your side was all you could ask for in a best friend, but when high school slowly starts to separate you two, you realize you might鈥檝e taken your time together for granted. Was this how you two parted ways?
*gif not mine*
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鈥淲hat? Did you want some?鈥 You turned to see Taehyun holding out his goldfish to you. You had been daydreaming again and he had understood something was on your mind. Grabbing a handful of goldfish, Taehyun smiles and scooted closer, 鈥渨hat are you dazed about this time?鈥
See now, you didn鈥檛 want to tell him how you thought about him running his delicate hands through your hair. How you thought about his strong arms trapping you in a warm embrace, or how his plush lips would feel against yo-
鈥淵/N? I asked you a question,鈥 snapping you out of your trance, you glance over at him. 鈥淚t鈥檚 nothing, just stressed about the chem exam tomorrow,鈥 you lied through your teeth. He nodded and smiled, knowing full well you were lying, but he didn鈥檛 want to pry you. He figured you鈥檇 tell him on your own if it was something major bothering you.
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That was one of the last, full conversations you two shared for 3 months. 3 months ago, you practically lost your lifelong best friend to a group of popular kids and Soo Ah. She has a crush on Taehyun and everyone knows that...well..everyone except Taehyun. For someone so intelligent, he was so oblivious to the way she acted. He was never good with telling if someone had a crush on him and just thought they were super nice. He鈥檚 not stupid, just really blind.
Luckily for you, this played in your favor at times you slipped up and were way too obvious about your crush.
You pushed yourself away from Taehyun because the more you stuck around him, the more you fell in love with him. He noticed the space growing between you two and tried to make things up to you, but after a while, he stopped trying. He thought you just needed some space and that鈥檚 what he gave you. Over time, the space became overbearing and he had drifted to his new friends.
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Skipping lunch, you headed to the school鈥檚 courtyard to scroll through your phone under the shade of a tree. It was a bit cooler out, autumn having just started. 鈥淗ey stupid!鈥 Your head shooting up at the name only to see Beomgyu jogging over to you, a dumb smile plastered on his handsome face.
Beomgyu was one of yours and Taehyun鈥檚 mutual friends, alternating the days he鈥檇 spend his lunch with Taehyun and you. He knew everything about you and Taehyun slowly drifting, your massive crush on him, and everything in between.
He sat next to you, leaning against the trunk of the tree. He glanced at your phone, resting his chin on your shoulder. 鈥淥W, Beomgyu, your chin is sharp as hell,鈥 鈥淗un, I know my jawline can cut, but you don鈥檛 have to be so aggressive,鈥 he smirked at you. You shoved his face away (lightly) and scoffed, 鈥減lease, if I wanted to say anything about your jawline, it鈥檚 that you need to work on it.鈥 That was a flat out lie because Beomgyu had the sharpest jawline in the school but you didn鈥檛 want to admit it. 鈥淲hat鈥檙e you doing out here? Thinking about Taehyun?鈥 he teased you. You eyed him, 鈥測eah and? What about it?鈥
You missed Taehyun, a lot. You wished you could鈥檝e just gotten over this stupid crush and stayed friends. If you had any ideas on becoming friends again without it being awkward, you鈥檇 have done that already, but to no avail. 鈥淎ny plans on getting him back or winning his heart over?鈥 Beomgyu grinned at you, making you really tempted to flick his forehead.
The two of you heard loud laughter and chattering, and when you looked over, it was Taehyun鈥檚 group, as you expected. Letting out a sigh, you went back to scrolling mindlessly through Twitter. What you didn鈥檛 know was Taehyun had returned the gaze when you put your head down.
What you also didn鈥檛 know was that Taehyun missed you even more, but he didn鈥檛 know if it was okay to approach you. He thought you might need more space, afraid he鈥檚 making you uncomfortable. He was so lonely without you by his side and his new friends weren鈥檛 as genuine as you were.
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The bell rang and Beomgyu pulled you up off the ground, slinging an arm around your shoulders as you guys walked to your class together, math. You hated math, you could never grasp what was going on, but Taehyun would make that class bearable for you. That is, until, you know鈥
You sat in your assigned seat, Beomgyu letting go of you and going to his behind you. Taehyun and Soo Ah came in shortly after, Taehyun being on your right and Soo Ah on Taehyun鈥檚 other side. It was just your luck to be assigned to that seat, but at least Beomgyu was right there.
Searching through your bag, you couldn鈥檛 find your pencil. Turning around to face Beomgyu, you knew full well he took your spare pencil, 鈥淕yu, I need my pencil.鈥 鈥淲ha-what pencil, pfft, I don鈥檛 have your pencil,鈥 Beomgyu smiled at you, slowly moving the borrowed pencil under the desk. 鈥淚鈥檓 serious, I can鈥檛 find my pencil and you took my spare,鈥 he pinched your cheek and just giggled, 鈥淟et me have it please, I forgot mine again.鈥 You scoffed at Beomgyu for the nth time that day, he鈥檚 so forgetful.
Settling on looking for a pen, you turn back around to see a pencil sitting on your desk. You knew it wasn鈥檛 yours, looking around to see who put it there, your eyes met Taehyun鈥檚, who smiled brightly at you. Mouthing a 鈥渢hank you,鈥 you turned back around to give Beomgyu a quick flick to the forehead before facing forward again when the teacher walked in. 鈥淥W!鈥 he whisper-shouted, making you chuckle a bit, and unknowingly, Taehyun laughed to himself too.
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The rest of the day went by far too slow, but you could finally leave this hellhole and that鈥檚 all that mattered to you. Walking out of your last class, you were heading home when you felt someone put their hand on your shoulder. 鈥淵/N! Wait!鈥 the familiar sound of Taehyun鈥檚 voice in your ears.
You turned your head to see a slightly out-of-breath Taehyun who had ran out of the classroom to catch up with you. 鈥淐an we please talk?鈥 he asked, surprised by his sudden approach, you nod your head. He鈥檚 quick to move as he slides his hand down from your shoulder to your wrist. He drags you to the same tree you were under in the courtyard, where you sat with Beomgyu during lunch.
Taehyun looked down at you, almost like he was in pain, 鈥淵/N, what happened to us?鈥 You were a bit taken aback by his straightforwardness, unsure of what exactly to say. 鈥淚鈥檓 not sure Taehyun, I really don鈥檛 know,鈥 your voice getting softer towards the end of the sentence. You were lying right to his face, you knew why the distance grew and you felt as though it was partially your fault. 鈥淵/N, please don鈥檛 lie to me, you know I鈥檓 always here for you and I won鈥檛 judge you. You kept pushing me away so I gave you space cause I thought you might need some alone time, but it鈥檚 been too long. Let me be by your side, through whatever you may be going through, please.鈥 His voice broke, his normally bright and smiling eyes showing a sense of longing in them.
You felt terrible and you didn鈥檛 want your friendship to end like this, 鈥淚鈥檓 sorry Taehyun, I-鈥 鈥淭aehyun-ah! Let鈥檚 go!鈥 In the distance stood Soo Ah, waving her hand at him. When Taehyun faced her, she was already walking towards him, smiling at Taehyun and only Taehyun. Your heart cracked at the sight of them in front of you. 鈥淭aehyun, we were supposed to go out together after class. I鈥檝e been looking for you everywhere,鈥 Soo Ah glancing in your direction after saying 鈥済o out TOGETHER.鈥
You could feel your heart hammering against your chest when Taehyun smiled at her. 鈥淥h yeah, sorry, let鈥檚 go?鈥 Taehyun鈥檚 grasp finally leaving your wrist from when he first dragged you through the hallways just a few minutes ago. You watched as Soo Ah linked arms with him, walking off, the two of them acting as if you weren鈥檛 even there.
A single tear falling from your eye as you watched them walk off together, Soo Ah turning back to you and smirking. Furiously wiping the tear away, you quickly walked to Beomgyu鈥檚 house.
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鈥淗oly fUCK, Y/N!鈥 Beomgyu jumped up from his bed, startled that you were in his house, his bedroom door flinging open from your impatience.
He was still wearing his school uniform but the necktie loosened and the first button undone. Beomgyu noticed the tears pooling in the corners of your eyes as you gasped and hiccuped, trying to hold everything in.
He walked over, embracing you tightly, 鈥淲anna tell me what happened?鈥 You finally let everything out, your tears nonstop, stumbling over your words with hiccups, 鈥淭-taehyun and I w-were ta-talking about what ha-happened, whEn-when SoO-sOo Ah interrupted a-and..anD shE-she said h-her and T-taehyun were su-supposed to g-go out t-together, just-just the two o-of th-them.鈥 鈥淵/N, breathe. You need to breathe.鈥 He slowly stroked your head before pulling away to see your face.
After another half hour of crying and trying to explain a bit more of what happened, Beomgyu looked at you with a sad expression. He loved Taehyun but sometimes Taehyun was so dense.
鈥淕yu?鈥 鈥淗m?鈥 鈥淒o you think Taehyun likes his new friends more than me? Do you think...he likes Soo Ah more than me?鈥 Your voice trailed off at the end. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 think so, Y/N. I know it seems like he does but something seems a bit off when he鈥檚 with them, like he鈥檚 not as happy with them. I鈥檝e seen the way he acts when he鈥檚 with you and when he鈥檚 with them. As for Soo Ah? I鈥檓 not sure, hun.鈥
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The next day, your first few classes passed in a blur. You walked outside during lunch like usual, having no appetite or willpower to walk into the cafeteria knowing you鈥檒l see Taehyun and his group at the table closest to the door.
You were sitting under the usual tree, looking through social media but not paying much attention to any of it. You heard footsteps approach you but didn鈥檛 think much of it, assuming it was Beomgyu. Who you thought was Beomgyu was wearing a pair of shoes you knew didn鈥檛 belong to him.
You glanced up to see Soo Ah looking down at you, 鈥淐an I help you?鈥 Soo Ah, arms crossed, said 鈥淵eah you can, stay away from Taehyun. I鈥檓 gonna confess to him today and I know he鈥檒l say yes, so I need you to back off.鈥 Scoffing at her confidence, you narrowed your eyes at her, 鈥渨hat makes you think he likes you?鈥 鈥淚 just know he does, the way he looks and smiles at me, I suggest you cut off all contact with him before I do it for you.鈥 You raise a brow at her, unimpressed by her response, 鈥渢rust me, you鈥檙e not special enough for him to accept your confession.鈥 This time, Soo Ah scoffed at you, 鈥淵eah? Then why鈥檇 he leave you to be with me, hm?鈥
You were completely speechless, all you could do was glare, because she wasn鈥檛 exactly wrong. Before you knew it, you felt an ice cold liquid running down your head, wetting your uniform. 鈥淵/N!鈥 You heard that same familiar voice shout your name. Taehyun came running over, seeing the whole thing, Beomgyu right on his tail, outside long enough to see you get covered in water.
Taehyun had held his hand out to help you up from where you were sitting on the ground, but you got up on your own. He looked at you, worried and unsure of what to do, 鈥渁re you okay?鈥 completely ignoring Soo Ah鈥檚 presence. Taehyun reaches out to try and hold you, hug you, something, however, you shoved him away.
鈥淒on鈥檛 act like you care,鈥 you barked, confusion was plastered on his face, 鈥淲hat are you talking about? I鈥檝e always cared, Y/N.鈥 鈥淥h really? Cause for the past three months it surely seems like you didn鈥檛 care enough to still be friends with me. You didn鈥檛 care enough to finish talking to me yesterday but ran off with Soo Ah to go on your little date. You didn鈥檛 care enough to talk to me or even be with me when you saw me alone these past three months. So when? When did you care?鈥 you seethed through your teeth, your jaw clenching in anger.
Taehyun scoffed, in complete disbelief that you would say that, 鈥淢e?? Not caring? As if, Y/N. That鈥檚 pure bullshit, when have I not cared? When you first started pushing me away I still tried to keep us together because I didn鈥檛 want to lose you, but you still kept pushing me further away. I thought you just wanted to be alone so I let you. I was waiting for when you were ready to talk because I thought we were friends, but you didn鈥檛 trust me enough to tell me anything. I鈥檓 not stupid, Y/N, I know you were lying every time I asked you if you were okay or what you were thinking about. It seemed like YOU didn鈥檛 care. You made no effort to keep me by your side, you made no effort to tell me or talk to me about it. Are you kidding me? I鈥檓 the one who doesn鈥檛 care?鈥 By this time, Beomgyu had dragged Soo Ah away to leave you two alone to talk, not wanting to be there for something he shouldn鈥檛 see or hear.
鈥淚 DO care, Taehyun. God, do you think I would鈥檝e liked you for so long if I DIDN鈥橳 care?鈥 At this point, tears of agony and pent up anger were streaming down your face like a waterfall; freefalling. 鈥淵ou...you what?鈥 Taehyun was clearly shocked by what you had said, and it finally hit you.
You just confessed. You just told him how you felt after all this time. Quickly grabbing your bag, you sprinted to the girls bathroom, breezing past Beomgyu on the way there. Taehyun started to chase after you to catch up, but who knew you could run so fast in this situation? You slammed the stall door and collapsed against it, covering your mouth to muffle your sobs.
Wiping your tears was no use because they just kept coming. Suddenly, a voice echoed into the bathroom from the door, 鈥淵/N? It鈥檚 Beomgyu, if you need anything, I鈥檓 right outside okay? I can lend you my jacket to cover the wet spot on your uniform. If you want, we can go to the nurse鈥檚 office so you don鈥檛 have to go to class.鈥
Finally managing to stop the tears, you wiped your face, not even trying to cover up the fact that you were just sobbing. Your eyes were far too red and puffy for you to try and trick anyone. You walked out of the bathroom, your head hanging. Beomgyu had covered you with his jacket, leading you to the nurse鈥檚 office.
After about five aimless minutes, you two walked out of the nurse鈥檚 office, the nurse saying there鈥檚 nothing she can do about your 鈥渟tomach pains.鈥 Beomgyu tried to argue with her but you just pulled him out, telling him it鈥檚 no big deal.
Of course it wasn鈥檛 鈥渘o big deal鈥 to you, because you didn鈥檛 want to have to go to the rest of your classes when Taehyun was in every one of your last few periods.
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You and Beomgyu walked into class, your eyes looking anywhere but at Taehyun. Slowly sliding into your seat, you scoot as far from Taehyun as possible without moving your desk. He seemed to have noticed though, a sudden sharp intake of breath coming from him.
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Every class after lunch had felt increasingly long, but when the final bell rang, you packed your things and practically sprinted out like your life depended on it.
You ran all the way back home, lucky that it wasn鈥檛 too far from the school.
On your way home, you prayed that Taehyun wasn鈥檛 behind you, but you heard his voice booming from just a few feet behind you. Picking up the pace, you reached your front door, house key already in hand. Somehow you managed to get the door open and slip through just before he reached the handle.
You locked the door behind you, panting from having run so fast for so long. P.E. did not prepare you enough for moments like this. Taehyun started pounding on the door, 鈥淵/N, please! We need to talk.鈥 Before you knew it, your eyes were pooling with tears again, 鈥淚 really don鈥檛 want to talk to you right now, Taehyun. Please leave.鈥
Checking the peep hole, you saw him breathing heavily as he looked down. 鈥淵ou can鈥檛 avoid me forever, Y/N, please. It鈥檚 pointless. We have to talk about it sooner or later.鈥 鈥淚 don鈥檛 want to, I鈥檒l avoid you if I want to,鈥 you stated, you were nowhere near ready to approach him. You were unprepared emotionally and mentally, because all you could think about was how he鈥檒l reject you.
After taking off your shoes, you slowly walked up the stairs, practically pulling yourself because of the lack of strength in your legs. You fell into your bed, letting out all your tears and frustration. The tears would not stop but you didn鈥檛 fight them. Everything came crashing down and you just felt so suffocated by it all.
Was this how your years of built up friendship just ended?
You didn鈥檛 even realize a few hours had passed already when you heard a light knock on your door, 鈥淵/N? Come eat dinner now,鈥 your brother, Hyunsik, softly called. You quickly wiped your tears, saying you weren鈥檛 hungry and he let you know the food was in the fridge when you felt like eating.
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Y/N鈥檚 mom was downstairs when she heard knocking on the front door. She opened it to see Taehyun standing there, and with how long you鈥檝e been friends for, he was like her second son.
鈥淥h! Taehyun-ah, what brings you here?鈥 He quickly bowed, 鈥淗ello 鞏措ǜ雼 (eomeoni), is Y/N home?鈥 鈥淥h yes she is, but did something happen to her? She hasn鈥檛 come out of her room since she got home and her lights have been off the whole time.鈥 Taehyun fidgeted with the hem of his hoodie, faking a smile and saying, 鈥渟he told me she鈥檚 feeling a bit unwell so I came to check up on her, if that鈥檚 okay.鈥
Your mom smiled brightly at him, 鈥渁h you鈥檙e so sweet, if only my real son were this nice to Y/N,鈥 she said, making sure she was loud enough for your brother to hear. Taehyun giggled a bit and your mom let him in, ushering him upstairs.
He slipped his shoes off and walked up to your room. His hand hovered for a bit when he finally knocked on the door softly, when he heard a groan come from the other side of the door, 鈥淗yunsik, I told you I鈥檓 not hungry.鈥
Taehyun cleared his throat a bit, 鈥淚t鈥檚 uh..it鈥檚 Taehyun.鈥 Your eyes widened, why the hell was he here now? 鈥淲hy-why are you here?鈥 鈥淚 told you I need to talk to you, let me in please.鈥 You got up from the bed, your hand floated above the doorknob, you really didn鈥檛 want to see him right now but he was already inside your house.
You slowly pulled the door open, just enough for him to slip inside, then walked to the other side of your room, wanting to keep space between you two. He shuffled in slowly before quietly shutting the door behind him. Taehyun reached for the light switch to turn it on, you hissed slightly from the sudden brightness paining your eyes when you had been laying in the dark for hours.
Both of you were silent for a minute, letting tension fill up the space. He studied your figure, how you were slouched and your breathing was rigid from crying. You were still wearing your school uniform, Beomgyu鈥檚 oversized jacket draped over you.
When you had let out a breath you didn鈥檛 know you were holding, you had asked, 鈥渨hy鈥檇 you come he-鈥 You couldn鈥檛 even finish your question when Taehyun had cut you off, 鈥渄o you really like me?鈥
There was no point in you trying to deny it, all you could do was nod at his question. His gaze softened and he began to walk closer to you.
鈥淪o you mean to say that you鈥檝e been avoiding me because you like me?鈥 Taehyun鈥檚 voice having a hint of pain behind the tone, but you tried not to pay any mind to it. You let out another sigh, nodding at what he said.
鈥淟ook, if you came here just to interrogate me, then please leave. I already told you I don鈥檛 want to talk about it right now, so can we please just drop it and forget what happened?鈥 鈥淣o. I want to talk about it, whether you like it or not. I鈥檝e constantly let you go when you don鈥檛 want to talk about something, but I don鈥檛 care this time, you鈥檙e going to talk to me about it one way or another, Y/N.鈥
For some reason, you were split in deciding. Part of you wanted to just spill everything and just tell him, but the other part of you wanted to hold onto your pride and have him leave.
鈥淭aehyun, I鈥檓 not in the mood to-鈥 you were cut off by him once more, 鈥淚 don鈥檛 care. Do you know the amount of times I knew something was bothering you but didn鈥檛 say anything? Do you know how many times you hurt me because you kept wanting to push me away? Do you have any idea how much that hurts?鈥
The pain in his voice was becoming more evident. Taehyun now stood in front of you, his eyes shifting to study your facial features before landing on your eyes, 鈥淲hy can鈥檛 you just talk to me? You鈥檙e making this harder than it needs to be, Y/N. Haven鈥檛 you always talked to me about your problems before? What about now? I need to understand where you鈥檙e coming from.鈥
鈥淯nderstand? What more is there to understand? You heard me loud and clear and I know you did. Yeah I like you,but so what? You鈥檙e busy running off with your new friends and Soo Ah. It鈥檚 enough to tell me that you obviously don鈥檛 feel the same. Don鈥檛 you get it? I avoided you because I knew it was one sided and I honestly didn鈥檛 want to bother going through the pain of rejection.鈥
You noticed the corners of Taehyun鈥檚 lips were tugged into a small smirk, 鈥淲ho said I would reject you?鈥 Your head shot up at this, surprised but also confused. 鈥淲hat do you mean?鈥 your brows furrowed, making eye contact with him. He only stepped closer, your faces only being inches apart, leaning down a bit so he was at eye level with you,
鈥淲hy would I reject you when I like you too?鈥
Instantly, your face had flushed, taken aback by his confidence, 鈥渨ait, you do?鈥 Taehyun nodded, breaking out into a grin, 鈥淒uh, I鈥檓 surprised you didn鈥檛 catch on ages ago, I was so obvious. That鈥檚 why I thought you pushed me away, cause you found out and didn鈥檛 know how to say no.鈥
You automatically felt a smile forming on your face as you threw yourself onto him, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in his chest. He giggled at this, picking you up and swinging you around, causing you to start giggling too.
Taehyun set you back down, pulling away from the hug to look at your face, 鈥淪o then uh..will you be my (girl/boy)friend?鈥 Smiling even harder, you nodded your head almost aggressively, 鈥渄uh!鈥 He picked you up a second time, spinning you both in a circle before you two crashed onto your bed, big, bright, and stupid grins plastered on your faces.
Suddenly you froze, sitting up to face Taehyun, causing him to do the same, 鈥淗old on, you said you鈥檙e surprised I didn鈥檛 catch on ages ago. So then how long have you liked me?鈥 You were a bit shocked that it didn't hit you earlier, Taehyun scooted closer to you, leaning against your headboard, shrugging casually saying, 鈥渁bout three years ago?鈥 You whipped your head around to face him, 鈥淎re you KIDDING ME? I could鈥檝e been dating you THREE YEARS AGO?鈥
Taehyun immediately started laughing at your reaction, while you were still gawking at the fact he鈥檚 liked you for as long as you liked him. Your hand extended towards his side, poking him, 鈥淲hat? What鈥檚 so funny?鈥 you pouted at him. He reached out to pull you close to him, your faces so close you could feel his breath against your skin. His eyes went back and forth between your eyes and your lips, your eyes doing the same, glancing at his eyes and then his lips.
鈥淐an I kiss you?鈥
Your cheeks immediately turned bright red, but nonetheless, you slowly nodded only for his hand to slide up to the nape of your neck, pulling you in for a kiss. Both of your lips moved in sync, working against each other鈥檚 until he pulled away to catch his breath. Now he was turning bright red, smiling at you, only for you to grab his collar and pull him back in for another kiss.
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starlightkuna year ago
Text
sweet girl ; ayakashi 鈬 kun [two]
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鈬 word count: 11.0k
鈬 warnings: violence, cursing, super super brief barely-there alcohol mention
鈬 extra info: heavily based off yet another otome game, ayakashi: romance reborn ; bc of this, all the lore used in here is inspired by/based on/taken from the lore of the game, not the actual lore of traditional ayakashi/yokai stories
鈬 DISCLAIMER: some aspects of plot and character traits are directly lifted from the otome game ayakashi: romance reborn and utilized in the character equivalents in this story; the base lore, plot, and characters were heavily inspired by the game, but it has all been transformed into my own story. there are no spoilers for the game by reading this series
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鈬 [prologue]* ; [prev.] ; [next]
*you need to read the prologue before reading any of the individual routes so you know wtf is going on
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You woke up later the next morning than you usually would. Rolling over, you planted your hands on your mattress and pushed yourself into half a sitting position. At the foot of your bed was Taeyong, curled up in his cat form. You wanted to leave without waking him, but as soon as you shifted to swing your legs over the edge of the bed, he shot up, bright blue eyes watching you, unblinking.
鈥淢orning, Yonggie,鈥 you smiled fondly at him. Grabbing your phone from your nightstand, you winced when you saw the time. You鈥檇 have to grab something to eat on the way to class, 鈥淥r, almost afternoon. I gotta get dressed, you mind?鈥
He leapt off your bed in response, turning into his human form to open and close the door for himself. You also had a couple texts, which you wanted to reply to as soon as possible.
The first ones that you decided to deal with was the one in the group chat with your other Ayakashi friends.
[sicheng: I close the shop at 5, is everybody available then to meet at Lenticular Caf茅?]
[yuta: i can do that]
[renjun: the old man and i live there, its kind of hard not to be there]
[johnny: he means yes, that works]
[jeno: sure, whatever]
[yukhei: I will be in attendance and will relay the information to my brother]
[sicheng: Y/N?]
[johnny: she鈥檚 probably still asleep, which is good]
[sicheng: Right.]
Those were all from a few hours ago, so you sent your own reply.
[you: taeyong and i will be there!]
[johnny: perfect!]
[sicheng: How are you feeling, Y/N?]
[you: fine, and you guys were right, i just woke up]
[you: and have a class soon, so i鈥檝e got to go! i鈥檒l see you all at five!]
Exiting out of that conversation, you clicked on one that interested you much, much more.
[kun: I know (or at least am hoping) that you鈥檙e not awake right now. I just want to let you know once again, that I had a wonderful time last night and I hope I can see you again soon.]
The text was from six in the morning, so he was right to assume that you weren鈥檛 awake. He must have texted you between waking up and going to work. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as you thought that maybe you had been the first thing he thought of when he woke up.
[you: i had a great time too, and yes, we should definitely see each other again soon]
Humming to yourself as you got dressed, you couldn鈥檛 wipe the happy grin from your lips as you grabbed your schoolbag.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e in a good mood,鈥 Taeyong commented, watching from his perch on the arm of the chair. In his true form.
Right as you turned to respond, he lost his balance and dropped right off the furniture onto the floor. You winced, trying to hold back your giggles as you helped him up, 鈥淢aybe you should save that spot for when you鈥檙e in your cat form, bub.鈥
He grumbled, instead standing up and tilting his head at you. With suspiciously narrowed eyes, he once again stated, 鈥淵ou鈥檙e in a good mood.鈥
鈥淚s it a crime for me to be in a good mood, Taeyong?鈥 You scoffed, swinging your bag onto your shoulder. Your heartrate spiked when you felt a buzz in your pocket, and now you really wanted to get out of this conversation: it may be Kun texting you back.
He shook his head, offering you a small smile, 鈥淣o, of course not. You鈥檙e just not usually this bright when you wake up.鈥
鈥淲ell, I had a very good night last night.鈥
鈥淪o you鈥檙e going to see him again?鈥
鈥淵eah, I am,鈥 you nodded definitively, checking the time once more. 鈥淚鈥檝e got to get going, Yonggie! Sicheng wants to meet up with everybody tonight, so I鈥檒l be back after my class to hang with you, then we鈥檒l head over, okay?鈥
The Nekomata nodded, 鈥淥kay.鈥
鈥淏ye, bub!鈥 You said cheerily, giving him a short head pat before taking off for your class.
As soon as you were in the hallway, you brought your phone back out to check your messages. It was Kun texting you back.
[kun: Did you just wake up?]
[kun: If you did, you deserve it after last night, Y/N]
[kun: So how soon would you like?]
[you: texting me in the middle of the workday? not very good behavior to model as the ceo]
[kun: Check the business card again]
[you: how do you know i still have it?]
[kun: A hunch]
And so you peeled back your phone case and fished the business card you鈥檇 been given the first time you鈥檇 met him out of it. Skimming over Doyoung鈥檚 job title, you realized your mistake.
[you: my bad, not very good behavior to model as the vice president]
[kun: I鈥檓 on my lunch break. Speaking of, I just started it, would you like to join me?]
God, you were so tempted to. But you had a test in your class today, something you couldn鈥檛 miss unfortunately.
[you: i鈥檇 love to, but i鈥檝e got a test at one. another day?]
[kun: I understand, another day. And good luck on your test]
[you: thanks. so how鈥檚 your day going?]
You continued text Kun all through your short subway ride. As you emerged from the tunnel, you spotted the food truck that usually parked at a corner of your campus. You double-checked that you had enough time before jogging over and ordering yourself some lunch. Procrastinating outside your lecture as long as you could, you quickly ate your food between texting Kun.
Unfortunately, you saw that you only had a couple minutes to get into your seat and get your test materials out and ready.
[you: i鈥檝e got to go now, kun. i have something at five, can i call you after that?]
[kun: I鈥檇 love it if you would]
Well aware that you surely had a dumb grin on your face, you replied.
[you: then i will]
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After handing your test in, you left the science building as if you鈥檇 just escaped prison, breathing in the fresh air. It鈥檚 not that you didn鈥檛 like your Chem class, you just hated test days. You saw a familiar figure at the bottom of the steps, standing in front of someone sitting on the second to last one. The boy standing up looked up right as the door had been thrown open and gave you a friendly wave.
鈥淗ey, Y/N!鈥 Mark smiled up at you, causing the man sitting in front of him to whip around and look at you too.
鈥淗ey, Mark,鈥 you returned to smile, slowing down to chat.
鈥淵/N, this is my roommate, Ten,鈥 he gestured to the man, who regarded you with interest. 鈥淭en, this is Y/N, we sit together in Lit.鈥
鈥淣ice to meet you,鈥 Ten nodded in acknowledgement to you before reaching into the paper bag at his feet. Crumpled up on his other side was what looked like a white lab coat.
鈥淵ou do research here, Ten?鈥 You questioned, referencing the coat.
He continued unwrapping the sandwich he鈥檇 pulled out of the bag as he answered, 鈥淥h, yeah, entomology department.鈥
鈥淪o you had that date last night, right?鈥 Mark asked you. 鈥淗ow鈥檇 it go?鈥
鈥淥h, I forgot I told you about that,鈥 you admitted, feeling heat rise to your cheeks as giddiness returned to your demeanor. 鈥淚t went really well.鈥
鈥淣ice, I鈥檓 glad.鈥
鈥淪o you got laid?鈥 Ten snorted before biting off a mouthful of the sandwich.
You snapped your gaze down to look at him incredulously, 鈥淲hat the鈥斺
Mark interjected before you could fully curse his roommate out, 鈥淭en, dude, come on, just because you only think a date went well if you get laid doesn鈥檛 mean that鈥檚 everybody鈥檚 standard.鈥
鈥淚 don鈥檛 think that鈥檚 the only way for a date to go well,鈥 he argued, leaning back on his elbows to look up at you. 鈥淧eople have that kind of energy coming off them when they get laid.鈥
You rolled your eyes, 鈥淔or your information, man that I鈥檝e known for all of thirty seconds, no, I didn鈥檛 get laid.鈥
鈥淥h, then that must be your Onmyoji powers I鈥檓 sensing.鈥
This time he had fully rendered you speechless. How did he know, unless鈥
鈥淵ou鈥檝e got no tact, Ten,鈥 Mark groaned with a shake of his head.
鈥淚 do when I want to. And I didn鈥檛 want to now. The look on her face was priceless.鈥
鈥淵ou鈥檙e Ayakashi,鈥 you breathed out, easily accepting this. After all, why wouldn鈥檛 every single person you know be Ayakashi?
Your classmate addressed you calmly, 鈥淭en is, yeah. I鈥檓 an Onmyoji like you. You can鈥檛 sense that?鈥
鈥淣o, not yet. I just got my powers last night, so I haven鈥檛 really been able to do much with them.鈥
鈥淚f I remember correctly, you had already set a string of small fires by now when you鈥檇 gotten yours, Mark,鈥 Ten snickered. 鈥淔ires that I had to put out.鈥
鈥淵ou don鈥檛 need to remind me of that, I almost got a criminal record out of it,鈥 Mark sighed. 鈥淎nd I didn鈥檛, Y/N, uh mostly because they couldn鈥檛 figure out how I lit them, so it was hard to pin anything on me. It was also an accident, by the way.鈥
Remembering that you were still missing one of your five Ayakashi, you took a gamble, 鈥淒o you have your bond mark, Ten?鈥
鈥淵ep,鈥 he popped the 鈥榩鈥 before turning around and pulling down the back of his hoodie to show off the small lion across the back of his neck. 鈥淎nd you鈥檙e fresh out of luck, baby Onmyoji. I鈥檓 not one of yours.鈥
鈥淥h, okay. I figured I might as well ask.鈥
鈥淵eah, I got stuck with this dude as my all-powerful overlord and master instead.鈥
Mark鈥檚 ears and neck turned red at the way his friend addressed him, 鈥淵ou really don鈥檛 need to call me that, Ten.鈥
鈥淚 know, it鈥檚 fun to watch you squirm,鈥 Ten declared, then stuffed the rest of his sandwich in his mouth before leaping onto his feet.
鈥淵our break over?鈥 The other Onmyoji asked him.
He nodded, swallowing the food in his mouth, 鈥淢hm, time to go experiment on my lesser brethren. I鈥檓 sure I鈥檒l see you around, baby Onmyoji.鈥
鈥淪ee you,鈥 you said to Ten, watching him retreat back into the building.
Turning to Mark, you pieced together what the Ayakashi had just said, 鈥淪o鈥 he鈥檚 an entomologist, and an Ayakashi, and said he鈥檚 experimenting on his lesser brethren? Is he some kind of bug Ayakashi, then? Do those exist?鈥
Your classmate nodded, 鈥淵eah, he鈥檚 a Jorogumo, a spider Ayakashi.鈥
鈥淗e doesn鈥檛 feel weird about experimenting on spiders and being a spider?鈥
鈥淚 guess not, I鈥檝e never really had the guts to ask him,鈥 Mark shrugged, then jerked his head away from the science building. 鈥淵ou want get a late lunch? I haven鈥檛 eaten yet.鈥
鈥淚 ate right before my class, sorry. Sometime next week? We can chat about Onmyoji stuff. If that鈥檚 cool with you, of course.鈥
鈥淥f course, but let鈥檚 do that in more private places in the future.鈥
鈥淥h, right,鈥 you agreed sheepishly. Looking around, you figured that the only reason the three of you had been able to talk about it so openly then was that because it was a Friday afternoon, your campus was practically a ghost town, with very few classes happening on Fridays.
Mark then squatted down, and you noticed that Ten had forgotten his lab coat on the steps, 鈥淚鈥檓 going to go bring this to him. See you Monday, Y/N.鈥
鈥淎lright, have a good weekend, Mark!鈥
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When you arrived at your apartment that afternoon, you frowned when you couldn鈥檛 see Taeyong anywhere.
鈥淵ong?鈥 You called out into your apartment. After receiving no response, you shrugged. Probably catnapping.
With excitement buzzing in your veins from your short chat with Mark and Ten, you opened up your group chat with your Ayakashi friends. You had to let them know you鈥檇 found another Onmyoji and Ayakashi. After all, Ten and Mark could help you all with the Wraith problem.
[you: guys! you鈥檒l never believe what just happened!]
[yuta: what, y/n?]
[you: one of my classmates is an onmyoji too! and his roommate is an ayakashi]
[johnny: what? who?]
[you: mark is the onmyoji and his roommate ten is one of his true ayakashi, actually]
[you: they can help us with the wraiths, right?]
[jeno: oh shit she鈥檚 being stupid]
[sicheng: Y/N, you need to tell us everything you can about these two tonight.]
[you: do you want me to just invite them? i have mark鈥檚 number]
[renjun: correction, jeno: she IS stupid]
[sicheng: No. Don鈥檛 invite them.]
[sicheng: We鈥檒l discuss this tonight.]
[yukhei: I won鈥檛 be relaying tonight鈥檚 meeting to my brother, he鈥檚 going to come himself]
You had a growing sense of dread in the pit of your stomach as this conversation continued on.
[you: why do i feel like a kid who knows they鈥檙e about to be lectured but doesn鈥檛 know what they did?]
[renjun: because you are]
[johnny: it鈥檚 not going to be a lecture, it鈥檚 a discussion among friends, renjun]
[johnny: seriously, it鈥檚 nothing to worry about, y/n, i promise]
[you: jungwoo is leaving the shrine鈥 that kind of feels like it might be something to worry about]
[sicheng: You鈥檙e correct Y/N. Like Johnny said, don鈥檛 worry, but understand that this will be a rather serious conversation tonight. More-so than I had planned. I wish I could tell you now so you didn鈥檛 have to feel nervous until tonight, but I鈥檓 at work and it will be easier to discuss this in person. See you all tonight.]
[you: ok cool, gonna go have a real quick mental breakdown for the next two hours now, see you guys!]
[renjun: you鈥檙e fucking dramatic]
[you: you鈥檙e fucking rude]
[johnny: renjun, go back to work]
Turning your phone back off, you tossed it to the opposite end of the couch from you. You pulled your knees up to your chest, a thoughtful frown coming to your features. A movement in your periphery caught your attention, and you saw Taeyong padding into the room from the hallway in his cat form. Dropping your knees, you opened your arms for him, and he gladly leapt up into your embrace. He pushed his forehead against your neck, twisting around to get in the optimal petting position. Holding steadfast to your cat, you grabbed the TV remote.
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You didn鈥檛 actually pay attention to the TV show playing in the background as you pet Taeyong and let yourself get lost in your thoughts about your friends鈥 reactions when you brought up Mark and Ten. But it was text, you can鈥檛 tell tone over text, after all, you could鈥檝e easily misunderstood their meaning. You just had to accept that you wouldn鈥檛 really grasp what they were trying to say until tonight.
鈥淲e should leave, Y/N,鈥 Taeyong spoke up, the first time you鈥檇 heard his voice since you鈥檇 arrived home that afternoon. Honestly, you kind of forgot that you had a Nekomata in your arms and not just your cat Tama.
鈥淥h, right,鈥 you set him aside to let him turn into his human form.
鈥淪o what was on your mind?鈥
鈥淲hat do you mean?鈥
鈥淚鈥檝e been your cat long enough to know a contemplative petting session.鈥
鈥淩ight. You鈥檒l see when we get there,鈥 you shoved your feet in your shoes. 鈥淐ome on.鈥
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You got onto Bell Street a little earlier than five and decided to pop into your parents鈥 shop. They took Fridays off early, so unless there were customers, you knew that it鈥檇 just be Sicheng inside. You鈥檇 told Taeyong to go on ahead to the caf茅 while you grabbed the Mizuchi dragon. The bell above the teal door rang, causing Sicheng to snap his head up from where he was doing his final tally of the cash register.
鈥淗ey, Y/N,鈥 he greeted you, returning to his task at hand.
鈥淗ey, Sicheng.鈥
鈥淚鈥檒l be there in just a minute. I鈥檝e got to count this then I鈥檓 locking up for the day.鈥
鈥淐an I see it?鈥
鈥淲hat?鈥
鈥淭he bond mark.鈥
鈥淥h, of course,鈥 he paused his counting to turn, pulling down the collar of his shirt to reveal the whole lotus blossom. 鈥淚鈥檓 one of yours, Y/N.鈥
鈥淭hat鈥檚鈥 awesome,鈥 you breathed out, jaw dropped slightly as you scanned over the mark.
Sicheng had a bashful smile on his face as he released his shirt, turned back to face you, and continued his task at hand.
Memories of the last couple times you were in the shop came to mind, and you decided to ask, 鈥淪o have you guys been able to find the first edition Don Quixote?鈥
鈥淣o, and as far as I鈥檓 concerned, I hope we never do,鈥 Sicheng grumbled, beginning to put the money back. 鈥淭he less ogres I have to deal with the better.鈥
鈥淥h.鈥
He continued in a mumble as if he were mostly talking to himself than you, 鈥淎lthough I suppose he鈥檇 probably send his assistant to come pick it up, however, I don鈥檛 have much more respect for someone who works for Oni either.鈥
Yikes.
Sicheng came around the counter, ushering you towards the door. You left the shop, waiting for him as he locked it behind the two of you. Both you and Sicheng were quiet as you walked the short distance between Bibliophile Books and Lenticular Caf茅.
At the caf茅, the closed sign had been flipped around, and the only people inside were the two who lived there and Taeyong. Johnny stood to greet you, and you eagerly accepted his hug. Breaking away from him, you pointed to him and Renjun, 鈥淟et me see 鈥榚m! Show me your bond marks!鈥
They looked to Sicheng for a moment, to which the Mizuchi dragon shrugged, 鈥淪he made me show mine off too.鈥
With a chuckle, Johnny obliged, and Renjun begrudgingly did so as well. Excitement buzzed in your veins as you saw the matching symbols.
鈥淪orry if I鈥檓 being weird! This is just so cool!鈥
鈥淕lad you think so, little lady.鈥
鈥淵ou are fucking weird,鈥 Renjun rolled his eyes.
Before you or Johnny could say something, the front door opened again, and Jeno came through. Already yawning, of course. He didn鈥檛 give out any greetings, instead immediately making a beeline for a booth. As he walked by you, your eyes noticed something on the back of his neck.
鈥淪top!鈥 You ordered, grabbing his elbow.
He tried to turn to scowl at you, but you held onto his shoulder to keep him facing away from you, yanking his hoodie down.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e one of my Ayakashi!鈥 You exclaimed before spinning him around for the others to see.
鈥淵eah, didn鈥檛 I say that?鈥 Jeno retorted, finally shaking you off to reach his intended destination, flopping onto the booth鈥檚 bench.
鈥淣o, you didn鈥檛.鈥
鈥淥h, I must鈥檝e fallen asleep before sending the message.鈥
鈥淥f course.鈥
The next time the door opened, it revealed two tall figures, one clasping tightly to the other鈥檚 arm. Yukhei didn鈥檛 seem to mind the iron grip Jungwoo had on him, face as blank as ever. Jungwoo offered you all smiles, not letting go of his brother until the two of them stopped close enough to you for him to be able to grab your arm before releasing Yukhei鈥檚.
鈥淗ello, Lady Onmyoji,鈥 he hugged you gently. 鈥淐ongratulations on gaining your powers.鈥
鈥淭hank you,鈥 you grinned back at him. 鈥淐ould I see the bond mark, please?鈥
鈥淥h, so you鈥檒l ask him, but you demand us to show you ours,鈥 Renjun scoffed.
鈥淪he manhandled me!鈥 Jeno called you out.
Sicheng tried to defend you, 鈥淪he asked me as well.鈥
The Satori shook his head with a tsk, 鈥淲ell we clearly know who her favorites are.鈥
鈥淒id the little lady say 鈥榩lease,鈥 too?鈥 Johnny joined in on teasing you, raising his eyebrow at the Mizuchi dragon.
鈥淣o, I wasn鈥檛 granted that high of esteem,鈥 he replied, mirth glinting in his eyes.
Jungwoo still had his light smile on his lips as he shifted to allow you to see the back of his neck, keeping a gentle hold on one of your forearms. Indeed, there was a lotus blossom, just like yours, and like the others: Renjun, Johnny, Jeno, and Sicheng. So you really already had all five of your True Ayakashi.
鈥淥kay, so now we鈥檙e just waiting for鈥斺
Johnny was cut off by the door swinging open brazenly, the very man he鈥檇 just been about to name sauntering through. Yuta gave everybody a broad smile, 鈥淗ey! Sorry I鈥檓 late.鈥
鈥淣o you鈥檙e not,鈥 you scoffed at your friend, to which he threw a dramatic hand over his chest.
鈥淚鈥檓 hurt! I am agog and aghast that you could think me anything other than honest, Y/N!鈥
鈥淣ow who鈥檚 fucking dramatic, Renjun?鈥 You raised a pointed eyebrow at the Satori.
Renjun relented with wide eyes, 鈥淵eah, I take it back, Y/N.鈥
鈥淎nyway, you鈥檝e got your powers! Look at you, Onmyoji!鈥 Yuta pulled you into a tight hug, one that caused Taeyong鈥檚 hackles to raise, as per usual.
鈥淭hanks, Yuta.鈥
Johnny cleared his throat, getting everyone鈥檚 attention, 鈥淯h, now that everyone is here, we can start. Go ahead and sit somewhere.鈥
You determinedly stalked over to the booth Jeno was laying in and shoved his feet off.
鈥淵ou could鈥檝e asked,鈥 he grumbled, sitting up fully as you scooted in beside him.
鈥淲ould you have moved?鈥
鈥淣o.鈥
鈥淓xactly.鈥
Once everyone settled into the booth, on the table of the booth, or pulled up chairs around it, they all looked to Johnny and Sicheng, who seemed to both be figuratively鈥攁nd literally鈥攁t the head of the table.
Sicheng stood up to address everyone, 鈥淚 called this meeting, so I鈥檇 like to thank you all for coming. Now, I鈥檓 going to address why I have requested you all be here. We鈥檝e already established that the presence of Wraiths in our city has grown to a worrisome number, and their power has also been increasing heavily. Now that Y/N has her powers, I believe it would be ideal for us to run patrols around the city. The first rule of this would be to not engage first. End fights but don鈥檛 start them. Once Y/N can banish Wraiths, we would have her banish any troublesome ones. These patrols would mostly be just to keep an eye on things around here, monitor the situation and gather information.鈥
鈥淢akes sense to me,鈥 Johnny spoke up, and everyone agreed soon after.
鈥淲hen and how often would these happen?鈥 Yuta asked.
Sicheng replied, 鈥淚n the evenings once everyone is done with work and classes for the day. And I鈥檓 thinking two or three times a week, nothing excessive.鈥
You could definitely work dates with Kun around a minor schedule like that, 鈥淚鈥檓 down.鈥
With everyone in agreement on doing the patrols, you found yourself thinking about how they wanted you to banish Wraiths. You were fairly sure you just had to say the same chant that Kun had, no problem. But those Wraiths were different than the ones from the caf茅. You couldn鈥檛 get the image of their red, human eyes out of your mind.
鈥淪icheng, I have a question,鈥 you spoke up, quieting the excited chatter around the table.
Your friend looked to you attentively, 鈥淕o ahead, I鈥檓 all ears.鈥
鈥淪o the Wraiths that were at the caf茅 the first time I鈥檇 ever seen them, they just looked like normal people. Someone said they鈥 made their own human forms?鈥
鈥淵es. Usually they possess a human instead, but these Wraiths are particularly strong.鈥
鈥淒o they look any different when they possess a human rather than making their own human forms?鈥
鈥淭he eyes are different, yes. They鈥檙e red when they鈥檙e possessed. Why are you asking?鈥
Not wanting to relay your date night battle right then, you shrugged, 鈥淚 just want to be able to tell the difference, for patrolling, you know?鈥
Sicheng accepted this and continued on, 鈥淣ow, we have something else to address.鈥
Oh, right, the thing that had filled you with dread for the past two hours.
Johnny took over, very calmly and very seriously requesting, 鈥淵/N, tell us about the Onmyoji and Ayakashi you mentioned earlier.鈥
鈥淯h, well, the Onmyoji is one of my classmates, Mark Lee, and his roommate Ten is one of his True Ayakashi. He鈥檚 a鈥 Jorogumo, I think. That鈥檚 the spider Ayakashi, right? And that鈥檚 really all I know. I just found out this afternoon, and the three of us only talked for a couple minutes after my class.鈥
The Ayakashi around you all exchanged uneasy glances at your statement鈥攅xcept Yuta, who was extremely interested in picking at his fingernails.
鈥淲hy? What鈥檚 going on, guys? Why couldn鈥檛 I invite them tonight? Having another Onmyoji would help, wouldn鈥檛 it?鈥
Sicheng looked over at the Tsukumo-gami, 鈥淛ungwoo, could you explain?鈥
鈥淵es,鈥 he didn鈥檛 step forward, but sat up straighter in his chair. 鈥淟ady Onmyoji, the reason we are all uneasy about your finding of another of your kind is that it is not unheard of for old and powerful Wraiths to create human forms, but that is a rarity. For this many in one area to be able to do so鈥 they have to be supplied with that power by someone. Which is a task that only Onmyoji can do, I am afraid. While we have no proof that this classmate of yours is behind the uptick in Wraiths and their powers, it is not a chance that we can afford to take. Because no matter one鈥檚 intentions, the power of Wraiths is inherently corrupting, and typically does not attract those of pure spirit.鈥
鈥淥h,鈥 you felt like you鈥檇 just gotten the wind knocked out of you.
Sure, you and Mark weren鈥檛 best friends, but you couldn鈥檛 imagine the boy doing such a thing. While you didn鈥檛 wholeheartedly believe that Mark was behind this, you understood why you couldn鈥檛 risk involving him and Ten. But you weren鈥檛 going to assume the worst about him either. You wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, get at the root of this. Obviously not right then, however.
鈥淪orry, Y/N,鈥 Taeyong murmured, pushing his head against your shoulder to comfort you.
鈥淯h, thanks,鈥 you blinked, shaking your head a couple of times to clear your mind. 鈥淚鈥檓 fine. Surprised, uh, but again, he鈥檚 just my classmate, I don鈥檛 know him very well.鈥
Sicheng nodded in understanding, 鈥淭hat鈥檚 good. I recommend keeping your distance for the time being. From him and the Jorogumo.鈥
You didn鈥檛 want to admit that you sat next to him in your class, and promised to get lunch together next week, so you didn鈥檛. There was so much for you to think about, and everyone there seemed to have already determined his guilt in the matter so you didn鈥檛 feel like you could openly share your doubts in that moment. So you didn鈥檛.
The rest of the meeting was spent ironing out the details for patrols. You鈥檇 occasionally give your two cents on decisions, but you still weren鈥檛 fully invested in the conversation. Too many thoughts bouncing in your head that you couldn鈥檛 talk about with them. But you knew exactly who you wanted to talk about them with.
So when the meeting was final declared over, and Johnny offered for everybody to stay for dinner, you politely declined.
鈥淭hanks, Johnny, but I鈥檓 still really drained from my powers awakening last night,鈥 you fibbed, moving to stand up. 鈥淯h, Taeyong, you鈥檙e more than welcome to stay and eat, okay?鈥
鈥淚f you鈥檙e going home, I鈥檒l come,鈥 Taeyong frowned. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 want you walking alone at night, that鈥檚 not safe.鈥
鈥淭aeyong, it鈥檚 barely after sundown.鈥
Sicheng thankfully seemed to pick up on what you were trying to do, 鈥淚 need to head out too, so I鈥檒l walk her home, Taeyong.鈥
The Nekomata visibly relaxed at this, but still gave you a worried ear flick as he said goodbye to you. Giving your other friends your goodbyes, you then left the caf茅 with Sicheng.
鈥淭hanks, Sicheng,鈥 you breathed out once you were further down Bell Street. 鈥淵ou don鈥檛 have to walk me home, by the way.鈥
鈥淥f course, Y/N,鈥 he replied, hands tucked into his jacket pockets. 鈥淚鈥檒l walk with you at least some of the way, though, I have something to ask you.鈥
鈥淕o ahead.鈥
鈥淗ow exactly did you get your powers? I know you got them last night, but you haven鈥檛 really told us how.鈥
After Sicheng鈥檚 earlier ramblings about Kun and Oni ogres, as well as Kun鈥檚 deep apologies for activating your powers for you, and his spiel about how sacred something like that is, you had a feeling that telling Sicheng the true story wouldn鈥檛 be a good idea. You weren鈥檛 thrilled to lie about this again, but you had too much happening in your head to deal with that right now. So you told him the same thing you told Taeyong.
鈥淚 was on a date last night. A few Wraiths tried to pick a fight and my powers just happened, then the Wraiths were gone.鈥
鈥淎nd your date? I鈥檓 assuming they were a human, since your powers awakened.鈥
鈥淭hankfully he was in the bathroom.鈥
鈥淕ood timing on the Wraiths鈥 part.鈥
鈥淵eah, perfect.鈥
鈥淚s that why you asked if possessed humans and Wraiths who made their own human forms looked any different?鈥
鈥淢hm, the ones last night looked like people with glowing red eyes. The ones at the caf茅 just looked like people. I figured there might be a difference.鈥
鈥淚t鈥檚 a good thing the first time you had to deal with Wraiths on your own was possession; they鈥檙e weaker that way.鈥
鈥淪o I鈥檝e heard.鈥
Sicheng looked at you curiously, 鈥淔rom who?鈥
You realized your mistake too late, 鈥淯h, I think someone鈥檚 mentioned it before, I don鈥檛 remember now. Maybe I haven鈥檛 heard, I don鈥檛 know, I鈥檓 tired!鈥
鈥淩ight. Get some sleep, Y/N. I鈥檒l see you Monday for our first patrol.鈥
鈥淢onday,鈥 you confirmed.
鈥淏ye.鈥
鈥淏ye, Sicheng,鈥 you said farewell to your friend before parting ways, heading off on your own.
Immediately as soon as you knew he was out of earshot, you whipped out your phone and called Kun, just like you鈥檇 planned. On the second ring, he picked up.
鈥淗ey, Y/N,鈥 he answered smoothly, and already you could feel a weight being lifted off your shoulders by his voice.
鈥淗ey, Kun,鈥 you tried to force brightness into your voice, but you knew you鈥檇 failed.
鈥淲hat鈥檚 happening? You sound鈥 like you鈥檙e thinking about a lot of things.鈥
鈥淚 am,鈥 you groaned, thankful that you could just be honest with him.
鈥淒o you want to talk about it?鈥
鈥淧lease.鈥
鈥淥ver dinner?鈥
Looking down at your attire鈥攚hich was your 鈥榯his is my only class of the day and I don鈥檛 give a single shit鈥 outfit鈥攜ou set a parameter, 鈥淣othing fancy, please. I鈥檓 dressed like trash.鈥
鈥淚 just started cooking myself dinner and planned on leftovers anyway, so there should be more than enough for the both of us. At my place. That casual enough for you?鈥
鈥淵ou live in some rich playboy penthouse, so it鈥檚 still a bit fancy for me,鈥 you retorted, but couldn鈥檛 turn down the invite. You really just needed to see him, 鈥淪end me your address, I鈥檓 on my way.鈥
鈥淎re you walking?鈥
鈥淚 also have a subway card if required.鈥
鈥淚 can send Doyoung to come pick you up.鈥
鈥淗e gives me the heebie-jeebies, Kun,鈥 you deadpanned, earning a light chuckle from the man over the phone. 鈥淚鈥檇 rather walk.鈥
鈥淰ery well, it should mostly be done by the time you get here.鈥
鈥淎wesome. I鈥檒l see you then.鈥
鈥淚 look forward to it.鈥
With that, you hung up, and almost immediately got a text with Kun鈥檚 address.
Surprisingly, it was only a ten-minute subway ride from the closest station, then another five-minute walk. Considering you were passed out the last time you鈥檇 gone to Kun鈥檚 place鈥攚hich was only yesterday you were now realizing鈥攜ou had no way to really know if you were in the right place until you entered the lobby of the building. This you remembered from when you left his place: the elegant marble floors and impressive gold hardware. The furniture was all finely made with velvet upholstery, and you had just enough wits about you to feel ashamed for looking like you did while standing there.
Refusing to make eye contact with the person at the front desk, you walked over to the elevator and pressed the 鈥榰p鈥 button. When the doors slid open to allow you in, you pressed the one for the very top floor, nervously shifting your weight between your legs when the elevator started going up. It took some time to reach the top floor, the penthouse, the entire floor that Kun had to himself. The elevator deposited you in a short hallway that ended in a single door, which you knocked on.
Just a moment later, the door was swung open, Kun on the other side. He was dressed in a simple pair of dress slacks and button-up shirt, which had the top two buttons undone and sleeves rolled up to his elbows. A dish towel was slung over his shoulder as well. This man was too attractive for your own good.
He stepped back from the door to let you in, 鈥淗ey, you got here in one piece.鈥
鈥淚 feel like I didn鈥檛, but yeah,鈥 you let out a deep sigh, shuffling inside.
鈥淐ome on, food鈥檚 almost ready,鈥 Kun took you by the hand to lead you into the kitchen.
Once there, he had to let your hand go to finish chopping up a few vegetables then toss them into the pan on the stove. Whatever was in there smelled delicious, and your stomach growled. You leaned against the counter by the stove to watch him cook, rolling your neck to work out a kink that had formed there. Kun looked up from where he had been stirring the contents of the pan, eyes softening as they scanned your surely disgruntled face.
鈥淵ou鈥檝e definitely been thinking hard about a lot of things,鈥 he declared, setting his spoon aside.
鈥淗ow do you know?鈥
鈥淏ecause,鈥 he brought his hands up towards your face, his thumbs landing on the space between your brows. He gently rubbed at the crease you had there, forcing you to relax your features, 鈥淚 can see that you鈥檙e carrying all those big thoughts right here.鈥
鈥淚t鈥檚 a long story,鈥 you warned him, letting your eyes flutter closed as you enjoyed the soothing motions of his fingers along your forehead.
鈥淚 don鈥檛 mind.鈥
鈥淢m,鈥 you acknowledged his statement with a hum, trying to piece your thoughts together into something coherent to tell Kun. 鈥淪o now that I have my powers, Sicheng suggested that we all do some patrols. We being me, Taeyong, Jeno, Yuta, Johnny, Renjun, Sicheng, Jungwoo, and Yukhei. Jungwoo and Yukhei weren鈥檛 there the night you and Doyoung picked us up from the caf茅, by the way.鈥
鈥淚 do know them, though. The Tsukumo-gami brothers. Jungwoo鈥檚 a鈥 flute, and Yukhei鈥檚 a drum.鈥
Your eyes opened just the tiniest bit to look at him as you questioned, 鈥淗ow do you know them?鈥
鈥淢ost older Ayakashi in one area will know each other. Or at least of each other.鈥
鈥淗ow old are you guys?鈥
鈥淛ungwoo and Yukhei are older than me by a tenfold at least, but it still applies. They鈥檙e both well over a thousand years old. So comparatively, I鈥檓 a very spritely 196.鈥
This time your eyes fully snapped open at this information, 鈥淪eriously?鈥
鈥淪eriously,鈥 he confirmed. 鈥淵ou should ask your friends how old they are sometime, I think most of their answers would surprise you.鈥
鈥淣oted.鈥
鈥淐ontinue, Y/N.鈥
鈥淩ight,鈥 you closed your eyes once more as he resumed his ministrations. 鈥淪o Sicheng suggested that we all do some patrols together. They鈥檙e going to be two or three times a week, at night after everyone鈥檚 off work and out of class. Just you know鈥 patrolling around the city and seeing what the Wraiths are up to. That鈥檚 not really my problem, though, I鈥檓 fine with the patrols.鈥
鈥淪o what鈥檚 bothering you?鈥
鈥淎fter my class today, I ran into one of my classmates and his roommate. And it turns out my classmate is an Onmyoji too, and his roommate is one of his True Ayakashi. I brought this up at the little meeting tonight, thinking that they could help us, you know? But they all like freaked out when I mentioned Mark being an Onmyoji.鈥
Kun鈥檚 thumbs stopped for a split-second, but as soon as you opened one eye to look at him questioningly, he continued again.
鈥淲hy is that?鈥
鈥淭hey think the Wraiths are becoming as powerful as they are because an Onmyoji is providing the power. And they think the Onmyoji is Mark.鈥
鈥淚 see.鈥
鈥淚 just don鈥檛 know how they can think he鈥檚 doing this without meeting him! Just because he鈥檚 an Onmyoji doesn鈥檛 mean he鈥檚 doing this, there could be another Onmyoji here doing it. Right?鈥
鈥淐ould be, yeah,鈥 he agreed.
鈥淎nd I don鈥檛 know Mark very well, but we鈥檝e gotten lunch at the dining hall a couple times, and sit together in class, and I already told him that we could get lunch next week, I鈥檇 have to explain why I鈥檓 cancelling on him.鈥
鈥淪o you鈥檙e going to get lunch with him.鈥
You opened one of your eyes, sly smirk on your face, 鈥淛ealous, Kun?鈥
He laughed lightly, taking his thumbs off your forehead to instead tap the tip of your nose, 鈥淚 don鈥檛 know, you鈥檙e in my penthouse right now and not his.鈥
鈥淚 highly doubt that Mark has a penthouse. Him and Ten probably live in some tiny apartment like mine,鈥 you snorted, following his movements with your eyes as he returned to the stove to stir it once more. 鈥淏ut I mean, I sit next to him in class, so I鈥檒l see him then. And yeah, I鈥檓 still going to get lunch with him. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. Is that so bad?鈥
鈥淣o, Y/N,鈥 Kun set the spoon down to face you again, resting a hand tenderly on your cheek. 鈥淚t鈥檚 not. That鈥檚 great of you.鈥
You brought a hand up to hold his steadfast against you, 鈥淭hanks, Kun.鈥
He leaned in, and you closed your eyes in anticipation of a kiss. You weren鈥檛 exactly wrong, but he pecked your forehead instead. When he pulled back and pretended to focus on the pan again, you narrowed your eyes at him, earning a snicker from him.
鈥淎lright, alright,鈥 he gave in, grabbing your chin and bringing your mouths together.
You melted into the kiss, moving your lips rhythmically against his. Honestly, you felt like you could kissed Qian Kun forever, you were utterly bewitched, and you loved it. He moved his hand from your chin to your hip to draw you in even closer, and you took the opportunity to loop your arms around his neck, effortlessly deepening the kiss.
Kun hummed against your lips, which only enticed you to kiss him even harder, eager for his approval. He pulled back slightly, planting one, two more soft, slow kisses on your lips before retreating, murmuring, 鈥淔ood鈥檚 done.鈥
鈥淣ot hungry,鈥 you locked your lips with his once more, and he gave in for just a moment before your stomach betrayed you, rumbling loudly. He disconnected your mouths with a chuckle.
鈥淚 think your stomach would care to say otherwise.鈥
With that, he broke away from you, turning the stove off and pulling the pan away from the hot burner.
鈥淭raitor,鈥 you growled at your stomach as Kun grabbed two plates from the cabinet.
鈥淲hat do you want to drink? I鈥檝e got water, sparkling water, flavored sparkling water, wine, whiskey.鈥
鈥淲ater鈥檚 just fine. Uh, normal water, by the way.鈥
鈥淕ot it.鈥
Kun set the two glasses down catty-corner to each other at the table, where two sets of utensils and napkins had been placed, then returned to the stove to plate the food. You sat at one of the seats, reaching out for your glass of water as you watched him expertly dish dinner out, then take the hand towel off his shoulder and drape it over the handle of the oven. He set the plates down as well, then joined you at the table.
鈥淭hank you,鈥 you said quietly, tapping your nail against the outside of the glass in your hand.
鈥淭hank you for coming over,鈥 Kun retaliated, picking up his own glass and tilting it towards you.
You took the hint, gently clinking your glasses together, the sound of it light in the air.
Your eyes spotted a long scar across his forearm, barely there, and you set your drink down to tap it with interest, 鈥淲hat鈥檚 this? A cooking accident? Knife got a little out of hand?鈥
Kun looked down at his forearm too, then chuckled, 鈥淥h, I don鈥檛 know, maybe. I鈥檓 one hundred and ninety-six, I鈥檝e got more scars than I can count, and I can barely remember where most of them came from, honestly.鈥
鈥淚 see鈥︹
After taking a sip of your drink, you picked up your fork and dug in. The meal that Kun had prepared was incredible, the flavors dancing across your tongue eloquently. Not to mention that the sight in front of you was even more delicious.
At that thought, you picked your water back up and chugged about half of it. You needed to stop. After all, you had an apartment to unlock for your Nekomata, who had no key of his own. You should鈥檝e probably gotten him a key by now. Shit.
鈥淪orry, give me a second,鈥 you apologized to Kun as you brought your phone out.
Clicking on Johnny鈥檚 contact, you texted him.
[you: is taeyong still at the caf茅?]
The Domeki was quick to reply.
[johnny: yeah, do you need to talk to him?]
[you: no, can you just let me know when he leaves?]
[johnny: uh, he probably shouldn鈥檛]
[you: why?]
[johnny: yuta thought he needed to lighten up. some alcohol was consumed. turns out taeyong is a lightweight]
Just imagining a drunk Taeyong was rather entertaining to you, so you couldn鈥檛 even be mad at the others for getting him drunk. With a resigned smile tugging at your features, you responded.
[you: keep him for the night, please]
[johnny: i will. you want me to drop him off tomorrow or will you come pick him up?]
[you: i鈥檒l pick him up whenever. don鈥檛 let him get into any trouble, please]
[johnny: i won鈥檛, have a good night!]
[you: night, johnny. and tell him goodnight from me too, if he鈥檚 not passed out by the time you guys are done with him]
[johnny: will do!]
Now with that problem off your mind, you turned your phone back off and tucked it away.
鈥淪orry about that, I had suddenly remembered something that I had to take care of.鈥
鈥淚t鈥檚 fine,鈥 Kun reassured you. 鈥淚s everything okay?鈥
鈥淥h, yeah, I just had left Taeyong at the caf茅 with the other guys, so I wanted to see how he was doing.鈥
鈥淎nd how is he doing?鈥
鈥淗e鈥檚 drunk for what I鈥檓 guessing is the first time in his life.鈥
He very coolly asked, 鈥淒o you have to go get him?鈥
鈥淣ot tonight,鈥 you informed him coyly. 鈥淛ohnny鈥檚 letting him spend the night.鈥
鈥淗ow nice of Johnny.鈥
鈥淚 know,鈥 you took a much smaller sip of your water this time. Your plates were both empty, you had no obligations to be home tonight. Admittedly, you weren鈥檛 exactly wearing something that oozed sex appeal, but the man in front of you definitely was. Here goes nothing. 鈥淲hat about you, Kun? Are you nice?鈥
His eyes narrowed in just the slightest, eyebrow raised as he seemed to be trying to figure out if you really were insinuating that. The corner of his mouth curled in the most enticing way as he leaned forward to declare, 鈥淔or you? Absolutely.鈥
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Waking up in possibly the most comfortable bed you鈥檝e ever been in鈥攕ilk sheets, memory foam, and all鈥攜ou let out a yawn, stretching pleasantly before rolling over into another warm body. Kun sleepily lifted his arm to let you fully snuggle into his bare chest, draping it back over you to hold you close.
You were pretty sure you fell back asleep and woke up a couple more times before you were truly awake. Wiggling out of Kun鈥檚 grip, you sat up against the pillows, blinking as you slowly woke up more and more.
Kun鈥檚 eyes opened, and he propped himself up on his elbows to look over at you endearingly, 鈥淕ood morning.鈥
鈥淕ood morning,鈥 you echoed with a satisfied smile.
鈥淗ow鈥檇 you sleep?鈥 He asked, voice gravelly and deep with sleep.
鈥淕reat. Your bed is so comfy.鈥
鈥淵ou鈥檙e welcome to it anytime.鈥
You couldn鈥檛 help but smirk, 鈥淕ood to know.鈥
鈥淥f course,鈥 Kun smiled, grabbing your hand to drop a kiss on your knuckles.
With him laid on his stomach, and the sheets falling to his lower back, your eyes were caught on a couple marks on his back. Old scars, thin lines that you wouldn鈥檛 have noticed if you hadn鈥檛 been so intently appreciating the man in front of you.
鈥淲hat are these, Kun?鈥 You questioned, delicately running your fingertip over one.
鈥淥h, almost forgot about those,鈥 he turned on his side, hiding them back away from you. 鈥淥ld injury. I鈥檓 196鈥斺
鈥淵ou鈥檝e got plenty of scars, and you can鈥檛 remember where most of them came from,鈥 you finished, paraphrasing his reasoning from last night when you鈥檇 asked him about his forearm scar.
From that previous angle you had also clearly seen his bond mark, three simple pine trees, and noticed that instead of the bold, black lines of your own lotus blossom, they were a faint grey. Maybe different bond marks were all different colors depending on the Onmyoji who had them?
You frowned, about to question him about it when he slowly sat up, making his way up your arm with a trail of gentle kisses. When he got to your shoulder, you tilted your head to give him access to your neck, fluttering your eyes shut as he took full advantage of this. He鈥檇 just reached your jawline when he innocently offered, 鈥淏reakfast?鈥
His breath ghosted over the spot on your skin left wet from his lips laving it over in the moment prior, making a shiver go down your spine. You turned your head to properly kiss him, connecting your mouths hastily. Kun had no qualms with your lack of a reply, large hands immediately gripping at your sides to pull you onto his lap, a much better angle.
When you finally needed air, you pulled back just slightly, both your breathing heavy and intermingling in the very little space between you.
鈥淪ure,鈥 you replied just as innocently, hopping off his lap with the previous topic of conversation completely kissed from your mind.
Kun groaned as he shook his head, clearing his mind to think properly again, 鈥淎lright, I deserved that.鈥
You simply gave him a mirthful grin in response as you gracefully stepped out of the bed. Picking up a dark grey button-up you recognized as the one Kun had been wearing last night, and you slipped your arms through it. As you stood up, you haphazardly buttoned a few of the buttons, not quite caring if that right ones went into the right holes.
When you looked up, you saw that Kun had found himself a pair of sweatpants, and he was watching you with an amused smile, but also a certain darkness in his eyes.
鈥淟ooks good on you.鈥
鈥淭hanks,鈥 you walked over to him. 鈥淚鈥檝e always wanted to wake up next to a handsome man and take his button-up shirt to wear while I watch him make me breakfast.鈥
鈥淕ood thing I鈥檝e always wanted to wake up next to a beautiful girl and have her wear my button-up shirt while she watches me make her breakfast.鈥
鈥淕lad we鈥檙e on the same page here.鈥
鈥淢e too.鈥
Following him out the kitchen, you saw your hastily discarded dishes from last night still in the sink. As Kun searched through the fridge for something, you stood in front of the sink and started washing the dishes without a second thought.
鈥淥h, Y/N, you don鈥檛 have to do that,鈥 Kun鈥檚 head was back out of the freezer, voice calling out to you disapprovingly.
鈥淏ecause you have maids or something that do this?鈥 You teased him back. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 mind, really. It鈥檚 my way of saying thanks. You cook, I clean. So just say 鈥榯hank you鈥 and make me breakfast鈥
He kissed your temple as he made his way by you with ingredients, 鈥淭hank you.鈥
Cleaning the dishes didn鈥檛 take long, and after fumbling with the door mechanism of his washing machine for an awkward amount of time, you stuck them in the dishwasher as well. Now with nothing to busy yourself with, you decided to fulfill the rest of your dream: watching the handsome man you woke up next to make you breakfast while you wore his button-up shirt. Hopping up on the countertop beside the bowl of batter he had, you observed him scoop out and deposit the pancake batter onto the skillet.
鈥淢mm, pancakes,鈥 you swung your legs as you peacefully watched him.
鈥淪o you approve?鈥
鈥淎bsolutely.鈥
A familiar buzz caught the attention of your ears. Your phone.
鈥淲asn鈥檛 mine,鈥 Kun informed you. At your blank look, he explained, 鈥淢ine鈥檚 on silent.鈥
鈥淚s that wise for some super important businessman?鈥
鈥淵ou were coming over,鈥 he shrugged, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world that he鈥檇 do that for you.
Completely caught off-guard by the genuine sweetness of his statement, you could only squeeze his forearm appreciatively before hopping off the counter. You searched around the kitchen and living room for wherever you had left your phone. Honestly one of the last things on your mind the previous night was your phone, so you had no clue where it was.
Finally, as you had dug and stuffed your hand in between the couch cushions sometime later, you鈥檇 found it.
鈥淕otcha!鈥 You breathed out in victory, plopping down to turn the screen on. Seeing the percentage from not being charged, you winced. Probably just enough to get you through the morning, you鈥檇 definitely have to charge it by the time the afternoon came around.
The buzz was a text from Johnny.
[johnny: taeyong鈥檚 up. i鈥檒l feed him breakfast and give him the seo family secret hangover cure. come get him whenever you鈥檙e ready]
[you: thanks, i鈥檒l be by in about an hour or so]
[johnny: sounds good]
When you looked back to the kitchen, you were pleasantly surprised to see Kun already setting two plates of pancakes at the breakfast bar. You eagerly stood up and sat at one of the stools, waiting patiently for him to finish up at the stove. He turned it off and set the pan aside, once again grabbing two glasses.
鈥淲hat do you want to drink?鈥 Kun asked over his shoulder as he went to open the fridge.
鈥淲ater again.鈥
He nodded, grabbing himself a jug of apple juice.
鈥淵ou didn鈥檛 tell me you had apple juice last night!鈥 You said accusatorily.
鈥淢ost people don鈥檛 have apple juice as an evening drink, I didn鈥檛 think to offer it,鈥 he defended himself.
鈥淢ost people don鈥檛 categorize drinks by what time they typically have them either.鈥
鈥淒o you want apple juice, Y/N?鈥
鈥淵es, please.鈥
With a fond shake of his head, Kun poured the apple juice into both glasses then set them down by the plates. When he finally joined you, sliding onto the stool beside you, you picked up your fork and dug in.
Remembering the text conversation you just had, you took a sip of your apple juice to wash down the food in your throat then said, 鈥淎fter this I鈥檝e got to get going to pick up Taeyong.鈥
鈥淚 understand,鈥 Kun nodded. 鈥淒o you want me to drop you off?鈥
鈥淪ure.鈥
A lull fell in the conversation as you both ate, and your brain took this opportunity to wander off, most of your thoughts about the man in front of you. It really had just been a couple days since your first date, but you were so inexplicably infatuated with him for some reason. Speaking of your first date, you thought about his horns that you鈥檇 seen that night. They were rather interesting, all of your Ayakashi friends鈥 distinct features were.
鈥淵ou know, you can have them out around me if you want,鈥 you blurted out nonchalantly.
Kun tilted his head, swallowing the bite he鈥檇 just taken before asking, 鈥淲hat?鈥
鈥淥h, sorry, I forgot that I wasn鈥檛 saying all that aloud,鈥 you said before going to elaborate. 鈥淚 was thinking about your horns. You can have them out around me if you want, if that鈥檚 more comfortable for you. I really don鈥檛 mind. The others usually have some Ayakashi features out if it鈥檚 just us. Taeyong always has at least his ears out at home, Renjun鈥檚 eyes are usually their true colors, Jeno鈥檚 wings are always out, stuff like that, you know. Either in their true form or closer to it than their human forms. So if you want, I don鈥檛 mind the horns.鈥
鈥淭hanks, Y/N,鈥 he smiled, reaching out to take hold of your hand and squeeze it affectionately. 鈥淏ut one form isn鈥檛 more comfortable for me than another. I don鈥檛 really have a preference. I鈥檒l keep that in mind, though.鈥
鈥淥f course,鈥 you smiled back. 鈥淛ust thought I鈥檇 let you know.鈥
Kun rubbed his thumb over your knuckles before changing the topic, 鈥淪o you and Taeyong live together? How鈥檇 that happen?鈥
鈥淲hen I had just finished moving into my apartment, my very first place by myself, I figured it was finally time that I could get myself a pet. I went to the shelter and picked out this very cute white cat that I named Tama. Long story short, I had paid a hundred bucks worth of adoption fees for a Nekomata named Taeyong instead of a housecat named Tama.鈥
鈥淗e was seriously posing as a stray cat at the shelter?鈥
鈥淵eah, I guess. And I mean, once I found out what he was, I couldn鈥檛 really kick him out on the streets, so he still lives with me.鈥
鈥淗ow old is he?鈥
鈥淭he shelter guessed about five,鈥 you shrugged. 鈥淚 haven鈥檛 asked him since I found out who he actually is, though. He doesn鈥檛 look that old, but I guess for Ayakashi that means nothing because you鈥檙e 196 and look like you鈥檙e in your 20鈥檚.鈥
鈥淣ekomatas have a similar lifespan to that of a human, actually,鈥 Kun informed you, and you tucked that information away; not all Ayakashi have the same lifespans. 鈥淪o he鈥檚 probably around the age he looks.鈥
鈥淪o, twelve, cool.鈥
The man snorted at your jest, 鈥淪eems about right.鈥
鈥淲hy were you asking?鈥
鈥淛ust curious. I鈥檇 like to meet him sometime, you know.鈥
鈥淥kay, yeah. Of course,鈥 a smile played across your lips at the dedication and investment he was already showing. 鈥淲e can all get dinner together or something.鈥
鈥淕ood,鈥 Kun squeezed your hand that was he was still holding before he leaned forward to peck your cheek.
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Dressed back in your own clothes a short while later, you were sitting at the couch to pull your shoes back on. Kun came out of his bedroom in a simple t-shirt and jeans, which somehow took your breath away just as much as his suit the other night had.
鈥淩eady to go?鈥 Kun asked, coming to stand beside the couch.
鈥淵ep,鈥 you stood up, immediately reaching to lace your fingers with his. 鈥淗ow long of a drive from here to Lenticular?鈥
鈥淪hould only be about ten or fifteen minutes depending on traffic.鈥
鈥淥kay.鈥
Opening your phone, you gave Johnny a heads-up that you were coming.
[you: on my way, be there in ten or fifteen]
[johnny: see you soon!]
A little less than fifteen minutes later, and Kun鈥檚 car was parked in the only empty spot available near Lenticular. It was a couple storefronts down from the caf茅, actually, but you kind of preferred it that way. No need to explain the mysterious car that dropped you off if nobody saw it.
You turned to him to say goodbye, 鈥淭hanks, Kun.鈥
鈥淥f course, Y/N,鈥 Kun smiled back at you. 鈥淭hanks for coming over last night.鈥
鈥淭hanks for having me.鈥
鈥淚鈥檒l see you again soon?鈥
鈥淎bsolutely,鈥 you confirmed, already looking forward to the next time you saw him.
鈥淕ood,鈥 he leaned over the console, and you eagerly let him press his lips against yours. The kiss was short, but left you satiated long enough to finish your goodbyes for real.
鈥淏ye, Kun.鈥
鈥淏ye, Y/N.鈥
Wrapping your hand around the handle, you opened the door, and climbed out of the car. Giving him a final wave, you set off down the sidewalks, listening for when the car left. It wasn鈥檛 until you had opened the door to Lenticular that you heard Kun pull out of his parking spot.
Inside the caf茅, there was an elderly couple sharing brunch, and you were met by Renjun at the host鈥檚 stand.
鈥淯pstairs,鈥 Renjun spat at you as soon as you had approached him.
鈥淲hat?鈥
鈥淭aeyong. He鈥檚 upstairs with the instrument brothers,鈥 he informed you with no semblance of a greeting.
鈥淕ood morning to you too, Renjun,鈥 you scoffed out of habit more-so than actual offense. 鈥淪o Jungwoo and Yukhei stayed here too?鈥
鈥淵eah, Johnny decided to offer up our tiny fucking loft to them for the foreseeable future. You know, since Jungwoo is鈥 you know.鈥
So they really were committing to the patrols, and Jungwoo to being one of your True Ayakashi.
鈥淥h, okay. Thanks, Renjun.鈥
Walking past him and the purple curtain dividing the dining area from the hallway, you decided to pop in and say hi to Johnny before heading upstairs. The door to the kitchen was open, and you stepped in, eyes immediately finding Johnny at the stove.
鈥淢orning, Johnny!鈥 You greeted him cheerfully.
Johnny turned around, bright grin on his face already, 鈥淗ey, morning, Y/N!鈥
鈥淵ou don鈥檛 seem hungover at all,鈥 you commented.
鈥淚鈥檓 not. The only ones who really got shitfaced last night were Taeyong and Renjun.鈥
鈥淭hat鈥檚 why he was extra prickly, huh?鈥
鈥淵eah, not only does he have a hangover, but he鈥檚 also pissed at me for making him work with one,鈥 the Domeki said plainly, not seeming to sympathize much with his employee. 鈥淚 told him last night, he can drink as much as he wants, but unless he鈥檚 dead the next day, he鈥檚 working. He agreed.鈥
鈥淗e did it to himself.鈥
鈥淓xactly,鈥 Johnny lowered the heat of the stove. 鈥淪o how are you? Much more rested?鈥
鈥淵eah, I slept really well last night.鈥
鈥淚鈥檓 sure you did.鈥
鈥淲hy鈥檇 you say it like that?鈥
鈥淵ou gained your powers the night before and got some last night, Y/N. Of course you were able to sleep like a baby.鈥
鈥淗ow鈥斺
鈥淗ickeys.鈥
You slapped your hand up to your neck. Then the other side of your neck. Then your jawline. You hadn鈥檛 looked in a mirror yet, so you didn鈥檛 know which of the love bites that Kun had left last night had actually manifested into proper hickeys this morning. All of them could have, for all you knew.
Johnny oh-so-helpfully pointed to halfway up the right side of his neck and his jawline, and you instinctually covered it with your hands.
鈥淎h.鈥
鈥淗ey, I鈥檓 happy for you, Y/N.鈥
With a roll of your eyes, you dropped your hands down and replied, 鈥淭hanks, Johnny.鈥
鈥淪o was it a one-night stand or are you actually dating them?鈥
鈥淚鈥檝e gone on a couple dates with him. We鈥檙e going to see each other again.鈥
鈥淣ice,鈥 your friend grinned broadly.
鈥淪o what was the Seo family secret hangover cure you gave Yong?鈥
鈥淗ot sauce, whiskey, and soy sauce in a shot glass. He didn鈥檛 want it.鈥
鈥淚 wouldn't either, it sounds like a recipe for puking. You didn鈥檛 like force it down his throat, did you?鈥
鈥淚 would never. Jungwoo is upstairs with him giving him some spiked tea or whatever now,鈥 he gestured towards the stairs. 鈥淚 won鈥檛 hold you up anymore, go get your boy. I鈥檓 surprised he hasn鈥檛 smelled you and ran down here yet.鈥
鈥淢e too. Probably the hangover鈥檚 doing.鈥
鈥淧robably.鈥
With that, you took leave of the kitchens, heading up the staircase to the loft that Johnny and Renjun lived in. And Jungwoo and Yukhei as well, for the time being. In the small living area, Taeyong was sitting on the couch, hunched over and holding his head as Jungwoo was perched beside him, tea set on the coffee table in front of them. Yukhei was sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table, utilizing the 聽space left to have a small handkerchief spread out, what looked to be a disassembled watch laid along it as he tinkered with parts in his hands.
鈥淕ood morning, everybody!鈥 You announced yourself, causing Taeyong鈥檚 head to snap up. He immediately regretted that, letting out a sharp yelp then a whine as he dropped his head back into his hands again.
鈥淕ood morning, Lady Onmyoji,鈥 Jungwoo returned your greeting calmly. 鈥淲ould you like some tea? I was just about to give Taeyong something for his headache.鈥
鈥淚s the whole pot spiked?鈥
鈥淣o, just Taeyong鈥檚 cup has the medicine in it.鈥
鈥淭hen, sure,鈥 you came around to stand by the table, accepting the cup from Jungwoo.
He then picked up another and held it out to Taeyong, 鈥淗ere you go, Taeyong. It will help with your headache.鈥
With a grumble, Taeyong took the teacup and took a hesitant sip. Then immediately gulped it all down. He demeanor quickly changed, now able to properly sit up and look up at you. The Nekomata quickly leapt to his feet, throwing his arms around you, 鈥淕ood morning Y/N!鈥
鈥淢orning, Yong,鈥 you chuckled, narrowly avoiding spilling your tea.
You heard him take a deep sniff, and when you broke from the hug, he had a clear look of distaste on his face. Okay, so you hadn鈥檛 showered last night, but you didn鈥檛 think you smelled all that bad.
鈥淪o you two are staying here?鈥 You turned your focus to the two brothers before taking a sip of your tea.
鈥淵es, Johnny and Renjun have been very kind to open their home to my brother and I,鈥 Jungwoo answered.
鈥淚鈥檓 sure Renjun didn鈥檛 love this idea.鈥
鈥淣o, Renjun did not seem enthused about this, but as the property technically belong to Johnny, he was overruled.鈥
鈥淎nyway, Taeyong and I should get going, we鈥檝e got errands to run. We鈥檒l see you two Monday for the first patrol.鈥
鈥淎ctually, do you think you would be able to come here tomorrow so I could teach you some Onmyoji incantations that will be useful for Monday?鈥
鈥淪ure, yeah, I can do that.鈥
鈥淲onderful, I will see you tomorrow. Farewell, Lady Onmyoji, Taeyong.鈥
You and Taeyong gave the brothers your own goodbyes before descending down the stairs, giving Johnny and Renjun passing farewells as well. Out on the sidewalks, Taeyong shoved his hands in his pockets and spat out, 鈥淵ou smell like him.鈥
鈥淲hat?鈥 You whipped your head around to look at the Nekomata in confusion.
鈥淭he guy you went on a date with the other night,鈥 he retorted harshly. 鈥淵ou smell like him again. And you鈥檙e wearing the same clothes you wore yesterday. You said you were tired and going straight home.鈥
You were able to formulate some kind of defense, albeit vague, 鈥淚 had a change of plans.鈥
鈥淚s that why you wanted me to stay at the caf茅?鈥
鈥淣o, Taeyong. I mean鈥︹ you took a moment to compile your thoughts, well aware that you hadn鈥檛 been entirely transparent with your friend as of late. 鈥淭hat was part of it, yes, but I also offered for you to stay because you need your own life apart from me. I shouldn鈥檛 have lied to you, and I鈥檓 sorry for that.鈥
Taeyong didn鈥檛 reply, nose still turned up as he refused to look at you, all too interested in the passing storefronts.
So you continued, 鈥淏ut you deserve to hang out with your friends without me. Which is why today we鈥檙e going to get you your very own key. You won鈥檛 need to rely on me to come and go from the apartment anymore.鈥
鈥淎nd you won鈥檛 be burdened by me anymore,鈥 he scoffed accusatorily.
鈥淭aeyong, you are not a burden. You are one of my favorite people ever, Yonggie. But we don鈥檛 need to be together all the time. I shouldn鈥檛 be the center of your world anymore. I鈥檓 not your owner, you鈥檙e not my cat. We鈥檙e friends and we live together. Our lives absolutely will include each other but shouldn鈥檛 be entirely about each other. Does that make sense?鈥
鈥淪o your life鈥檚 going to be about him instead.鈥
鈥淚f you can鈥檛 listen to what I鈥檓 actually trying to say and have a productive, mature conversation then we鈥檙e done talking about this for now,鈥 you shook your head, stopping the two of you at a store and pulling the front door open for him. 鈥淐ome on, this place prints keys.鈥
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Back at your apartment, you stopped outside the front door and look over at Taeyong expectantly.
鈥淲hat?鈥 He scowled.
鈥淭est your key!鈥 You encouraged him.
The Nekomata grabbed the key that had been hanging around his neck since you鈥檇 left the shop, sticking it in the lock. He twisted, and it clicked open.
鈥淵ay! Your own key!鈥
There was a hint of a smile on his lips as he looked down at the object in his hand and opened the door, 鈥淵eah. It works. Thanks, Y/N.鈥
鈥淵ou鈥檙e welcome, Taeyong.鈥
Inside, you toed off your shoes and headed for your bedroom, fully intending on getting out of your old clothes, taking a shower, and changing into a fresh outfit before running your weekend errands.
鈥淚鈥檓 sorry, Y/N,鈥 Taeyong blurted out from behind you. 鈥淎bout earlier. I was cranky and鈥斺
鈥淗ungover?鈥 You finished for him, amusement in your tone as you turned back around to face him.
鈥淵eah, that too.鈥
鈥淚 forgive you, Yonggie.鈥
鈥淭hank you.鈥
鈥淚鈥檓 going to shower and change then go grocery shopping, if you want to come with me.鈥
鈥淛ungwoo鈥檚 tea fixed my headache, but I still feel pretty bad,鈥 he admitted, dropping onto the couch, and turning into his cat form. 鈥淚 think I鈥檓 just gonna stay here and catnap it off.鈥
鈥淥kay,鈥 you accepted. 鈥淗ave fun with that.鈥
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spellman-bbya year ago
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to all the girls i've loved before ][ p. parker
a tatbilb au
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Paring(s): LJ!tom holland x PK!reader
Inspo: TATBILB cause Peter is a total soft boi and also I'm a slut for rom-coms
Word Count: 1500+
Warning(s): cursing and Peter being an awkward bean
Part: prologue | part 1 | part ??
A/N: andddd we back what鈥檚 popping y鈥檃ll
You sat outside the Parker residence, well the apartment building he lived in, tapping your fingers against the steering wheel of your car. Butterflies filled your stomach as you made your game plan. You were definitely going to confront him that was for sure, but you weren鈥檛 sure how. Pull a usual [Y/n] and practically yell at the poor kid or try to be as calm as he usually was? The entire situation freaked you out. Especially how much you... actually liked the kiss?
Taking a large obnoxious breath, you stepped out of the Jeep and made your way into the building. The elevator ride up was filled with more nerves than you thought possible. Once reaching his floor, hoping your memory of his apartment was correct, you found his door.
You ringed your knuckles against the door, almost gasping when it opened immediately.
鈥淸Y/n]?鈥 Instead of finding the strange boy you expected, there stood May.
鈥淗i!鈥 You have an awkward wave only to be pulled into a surprisingly strong embrace.
鈥淥h my gosh! Little [Y/n]! I haven鈥檛 seen you since you moved. Look at how pretty you got. And tall!鈥 The brunette gushed and pulled away from you with a large smile.
You blushed at her compliments, bashfully shrugging as she quickly ushered you inside.
鈥淲hat brings you here? Want me to make you a chocolate milk or something? I don鈥檛 have the farm-made you used to like, but I have Nesquik!鈥 May excitedly babbled on while you took a look at the interior of the place you once knew like the back of your hand.
It felt a lot... emptier. Sure, Peter had lost his parents when he was young, but there was always May and Ben. Now there was just May. You remembered Ben鈥檚 funeral, how hard it must have been for Peter. He couldn鈥檛 look anyone in the eyes that day, he could barely even get through his eulogy. You wished that the two of you hadn鈥檛 grown so far apart that day so you could comfort him. But life had different plans.
鈥淚 uh actually need Peter, is he home?鈥 She stopped rifling through her cabinets at your question.
鈥淥h? In that case he is at Gugino鈥檚, down the block. Can I ask why? Sorry I鈥檓 just nosy and excited, you have to come back for dinner soon!鈥 You paused at May鈥檚 question, knowing the truth would be way too embarrassing for Peter.
鈥淲e鈥檙e working on an independent chem project for extra credit. I didn't see him at all in school today, so I just want to get it started.鈥 Double lie, good job [Y/n].
鈥淭hen I will stop holding you here! Have fun on your little study date!鈥 May ushered you out of the apartment in the same frantic nature she possessed since you were little.
Though hearing the word 鈥榙ate鈥 made your eyes go wide.
鈥淚t鈥檚 not a-... date.鈥 She closed the door before you could even finish your sentence.
Peter would definitely be hearing back about this.
You couldn鈥檛 dwell on May though, you had a mission. Confront Parker鈥檚 scrawny ass. The letter? One thing. Looked like he wrote it in the eighth grade, weird but whatever. Him jumping you in the middle of gym?? Totally different story.
Stubbornness took over and you didn鈥檛 even have the time to think about how soft his lips were and how chills went down your spine when his hand touched your waist. Nope none of it. Absolutely not.
The drive to Gugino鈥檚 was indeed just down the block and you are thankful to see Peter inside from your car window. As well as his bike barely locked into the bike stand out front. You shook your head, that shit was bound to get stolen.
Gugino鈥檚 was a small Italian diner which primarily focused on pizzas and deli sandwiches, the smell that greeted you on the inside was pure nostalgia. Though you didn鈥檛 have time to bask in old memories, you had questions which needed major answers.
You took it upon yourself to join the boy at his lone table, not so gracefully making yourself a seat with a 鈥淪up Parker.鈥
He gasped while taking a sip of his soda, nearly making him choke. 鈥淥- oh! Hi [Y/n].鈥 He meekly replied, and you could feel just how much he was already panicking.
Even when he looked like he wanted to run away from you he was cute. How did you never realize this? You shook your head to dispel the thought line before it could get any further. There was a time and place for deciding on how adorkable he is and it is not right now.
A waiter stopped by the table and patted Peter on the shoulder. He was an older Italian man, grays occupying what was left of his balding head. He had a warm face though.
鈥淥h.. and anything for your lady friend, Peter?鈥 He smirked while Peter put his head in his hands.
鈥淪he鈥檚 not with-鈥
鈥淚鈥檒l take mozzarella sticks and do you have cherry coke?鈥 You interrupted the boy with a smirk.
The man smiled, 鈥渃oming right up, Sweetheart.鈥
The two of you sat in awkward silence for the next few seconds, yourself actually choosing to wait for him because you knew he would make it even more uncomfortable. Well, make himself uncomfortable, you felt fine.
鈥淪o... uh what brings you here?鈥 You nearly giggle at his question, but pull yourself together to put on that nonchalant attitude he apparently doesn鈥檛 like about you.
鈥淲ho? Me? I鈥檓 just here for some fried cheese sticks. Though I guess while you鈥檙e around I鈥檒l ask... what the hell was that today?? See normally when a girl rejects a guy over a love letter he wrote when he was 14, said guy takes the hint. No instead, you made out with me in front of the student body and ran away!鈥 Peter鈥檚 face turns more and more pink as you ramble, and you hate how cute you find it.
鈥淸Y/n] [Y/l/n]. I am not trying to date you, I鈥檓 so sorry about today.鈥 He says and you two both pause when the waiter brings over your mozzarella sticks and soda.
鈥淥kay well, here鈥檚 the thing. Your mouth is saying something... but your mouth was also saying something聽today? So forgive me if I鈥檓 a little confused.鈥 You dunked a stick in marinara sauce with a cheeky grin.
He shook his head, 鈥淚 only kissed you because I wanted to make someone else think I wasn鈥檛 in love with them.鈥
Well way to make a girl not feel special, Parker. Then again, at least it confirmed that he wasn鈥檛 obsessed with you. Still weird, though.
鈥淥h.. who?鈥 Your confused frustration quickly disappeared, changing instead to a devious curiosity.
He shakes his head, lips pursing as if to say he wouldn鈥檛 be answering that question.
鈥淵ou know... I could just tell the whole school that you wrote me-鈥
鈥淔ine! It鈥檚 MJ. And you鈥檙e not the only one that got a letter okay, so get off your high horse.鈥 This time you did actually giggle at his frustration, finding the boy to be very entertaining.
鈥淒amn player. Isn鈥檛 she like one of your best friends, why don鈥檛 you just ask her out?鈥 His jaw dropped and Peter rapidly shook his head.
鈥淪he was never supposed to read that letter! None of you were. I can鈥檛- me and MJ are so close, I don鈥檛 want to scare her away by saying I鈥檓 in love with her. Though I guess I already crossed that bridge.鈥 To be honest, you felt for the guy.
Sure the letter thing was a bit strange, but it was clearly something personal for him. Maybe a diary type medium, and it really seemed like he didn鈥檛 want anyone to read them. Even as a kid he had been that sweet, emotional type. Which was welcome in the small friend group the two of you used to occupy.
Flash was an ass. MJ was aloof, mysterious, and not even there half the time. Peter was quiet. You were wild. Ned was a dork. And Harry was somehow the playboy who always butted heads with you for the leadership position. Though that changed almost immediately after he transferred to his fancy rich boy school. And then you moved out to the nearby suburbs, with Flash as your boyfriend.
MJ and you felt out of touch too easily. And Peter and Ned became just a 鈥榟i鈥 in the hallway. Though, that was just the way time managed.
By the time he finished ranting, you had already finished your mozzarella sticks and soda.
鈥淭hat鈥檚 rough, Parker. I鈥檓 sorry these got out, just from mine... seemed really personal. I鈥檓 sure you and MJ will be okay though.鈥 You comforted him, placing a hand on his shoulder before standing up to take your trash out.
鈥淲ant me to give you a ride home? Least I can do after ambushing you.鈥 You add and he has a small smile on his face before he nods.
The ride home is silent for the most part. Both of your minds are too occupied to speak. Yours fills with thoughts of the day after that kiss. All your friends mentioned how word got to Flash and just how pissed he got. You hoped he wouldn鈥檛 lash out on Peter, but part of you was happy that he was jealous. Not that he had any right to be considering he was the one that fucked it all up.
Then, it was as if you had been struck with a stroke of genius.
鈥淲hat if we just let everyone think we鈥檙e dating?鈥
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taglist(s):
tatgilb -
@radtwinkie @dolan-mendes鈥 @whormotional鈥 @pluckypete鈥 @princessleah129鈥 @banjosanjo鈥 @astrobub鈥 @mktravelbuggie鈥 @iamaunicorn4704鈥 @used-avocado鈥
permanent -
@ultrunning鈥 @jesseswartzwelder鈥
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commonwealthorbust9 months ago
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OC Companion Meme
i got tagged by @ultrastimpaks鈥 !! thanks gio love u聽
rules: pick out a fallout oc and fill out the prompts!
tagging uh. @sleights-of-hand鈥 @rocket-69鈥 and @rotarydials鈥嬧 !!
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THE BASICS
>> which game would they be from?
Fallout 3
>> where would you find them?
A random encounter in the subways!
>> how do you recruit them?
"Just put it down! I didn't do anything to you!" Oppy shouts at the pair while holding her hands in the air.
"Aw, you really think I care, don't you?" The raider throws Oppy's backpack to another, who begins to dig through its contents.
"Never said that. Just give it back and I'll be on my--"
(I wrote it out as a dialogue tree scenario! Read the rest here!)
After rescuing Oppy from the raiders, you have the option to recruit her as a traveling companion.
>> do they have a specialized task?
If you give her dirty water, she鈥檒l eventually hand back purified water!
(First time picking up dirty water with Oppy traveling with you) 鈥淥ooh! My mom taught me how to boil all the dirt and stuff out of water ages ago. I can clean those up for you if you want! Much healthier too, don鈥檛 want you getting sick on me!鈥
(Giving her dirty water)聽鈥淥h yuck! Will get this back to you as soon as I can!鈥
(Handing back purified water) 鈥淏ye dirt! You belong with the plants, not in my drinking water, thank you very much!鈥
>> do they give the player items? if yes, which items?
Oppy will occasionally pick up miscellaneous items on your journey with her. Sometimes they鈥檒l even be useful! She will occasionally share them with the player. The things she picks up can range from an old pre-war phone to a stray stimpak she nabbed.
>> do they have a personal quest? if yes, what would it be?
Oppy doesn鈥檛 have a personal quest, but she鈥檒l occasionally bring up smaller quests to go to different places around the DC area for research purposes. The player will likely need to take down low-level enemies from these locations before Oppy is able to complete her research.
If enough quests are completed, the player is granted the聽鈥業n the Know!鈥 perk. This will grant special dialogue options while Oppy is by your side.聽
(For example, during the Stealing Independence quest if you have Oppy by your side you can ask Abraham to tell you more about the location you鈥檙e going to.)
>> can you romance them?
No.
(If flirted with)聽鈥淥h! Well, I鈥檓 flattered, but I鈥檓 not really looking for romance right now. I鈥檇 rather just go on more adventures with you! Where to next?鈥
>> what perk would they give the player?
Walking on Sunshine: Well-rested will always be granted after sleeping in a bed - being around Opportunity just seems to put you in a good mood! You also receive bonus EXP for any non-combat related actions.
>> what are their SPECIAL stats?
S - 6, P - 4, E - 6, C - 9, I - 8, A - 7, L - 7
AFFINITY
>> loves
- Using a cooking station.聽鈥淚 love cooking! Do you need any help? I know what I鈥檓 doing, believe it or not.鈥
- Helping others, doing good deeds.聽鈥淕ood work! Some people are just down on their luck.鈥
- Taking down Paradise Falls.聽鈥淣o one deserves to be treated like that. No one.鈥
- Choosing the non-violent option in quests. 鈥淵ou handled that well! Sometimes words work better than bullets.鈥
>> likes
- Helping Moira with the Wasteland Survival Guide.聽鈥淚 know it鈥檚 tough, but it鈥檚 going to help a lot of people! No, really! ...What do you mean I sound just like her, shut up!鈥
- Siding with Roy Phillips and doing the non-violent route of the Tenpenny Tower quest.聽鈥淵ou did the right thing, that Alistair guy is an asshole. ...Excuse my language.鈥
>> neutral
- Entering vaults.聽鈥淭he so-called height of the pre-war era... Did you know they were experimenting on people even before the bombs dropped? Cruel. We should get out of here as soon as we can.鈥
>> dislikes
- Drinking alcohol or using chems.聽鈥淗ey! Being intoxicated isn鈥檛 going to help us get anywhere!鈥
- Pickpocketing/Stealing.聽鈥淲hat are you doing?! Put that back!鈥
- Attempting to unlock owned doors or objects.聽鈥淪top it! How would you like it if I blatantly ignored your privacy? Those are locked for a reason!鈥
- Killing brahmin.聽鈥淚f you wanted to be a butcher you could have just said so, but this isn鈥檛 the time or place. What did they do to you?鈥
>> hates
- Leaving Harold alive during the Oasis quest.聽鈥淚 want plants back just as much as anyone else, but this isn鈥檛 the way to do it. He鈥檚 suffering at the hands of these people... Maybe you should have rethought that.鈥 (Oppy will pull you aside to try talking you out of it multiple times during the quest.)
- Blowing up Megaton.聽鈥淲hy... would you.... I don鈥檛 understand your- What? You know what? No. I can鈥檛 stand to look at your face. Don鈥檛 try explaining yourself, I鈥檓 leaving. Don鈥檛 come running after me, either.鈥 (Oppy will permanently leave you if you blow up Megaton. She will pull you aside to try talking you out of it multiple times throughout the quest.)
- Siding with the Brotherhood.聽鈥淚鈥檓 afraid I don鈥檛 get why you would do that... They鈥檙e only out to help themselves. Have you seen the way they treat anyone different from their own?鈥
VOICE LINES
>> 鈥渦se melee鈥
"Oh! Okay, I got my bat ready! I鈥檒l try my best!鈥
>> 鈥渦se ranged鈥
"I鈥檓 not sure that鈥檚 the best decision, I always seem to lose my ammo...鈥
>> 鈥渟tay close鈥
鈥淩ight behind you! I鈥檒l try not to trip you up.鈥
>> 鈥渒eep distance鈥
鈥淕ot it! They鈥檒l never see us- Er... Me, coming!鈥澛
>> 鈥渂ack up鈥
鈥淥h sorry, was I too close?鈥
>> 鈥渂e passive鈥
鈥淕reat! That鈥檚 my specialty.鈥
>> 鈥渂e aggressive鈥
鈥淲hy would you want me to do that?鈥
>> 鈥渨ait here鈥
鈥淣o problem! Do you want me to set up a camp while I wait?鈥
>> 鈥渇ollow me鈥
鈥淥ff we go!鈥
>> when healed
鈥淥w ow ow- Oh, thanks! You sure we don鈥檛 have to amputate?鈥
>> when killed (general)
鈥淭his wasn鈥檛... how I planned this going...鈥
>> when killed (by player)
鈥淚 trusted you!鈥
>> when talking
鈥淏ack home my granmama would always make these tato cakes- they were the BEST. You鈥檇 love聽鈥榚m. Maybe I could make them for you sometime!鈥
鈥淭here鈥檚 a lot more to learn about our history than you鈥檇 think. Doesn鈥檛 do any good to just ignore it when it鈥檚 all repeating itself again.鈥
鈥淥ne time my cousins and I were out playing in a nearby creek when we were young and Matty got his leg stuck in the mud.. We were out there for HOURS until my dad and my uncle came out to rescue us. Hey, at least we got snacks afterward!鈥
鈥淒on鈥檛 you find feral ghouls fascinating? I mean, basically losing your mind and who you are as a person.. Only hanging onto what little threads of memory you can hang onto. Must be hard.鈥
鈥淚 think the Capitol Preseveration Society is doing good work, even if most people don鈥檛 appreciate it. History has to be remembered somehow!鈥
鈥淏ack home we didn鈥檛 have a lot of plants, but we at least had more than there are here.. Sometimes I get tired of all the concrete and rubble.鈥
鈥淵ou know... As much as I enjoy looking back at history and all, I don鈥檛 want you to think I want to go back to it. Pre-war wasn鈥檛 good, I mean, hell, it ended up with a nuclear war that brought us to where we are now.鈥
鈥淚鈥檝e always thought people should make more of their own music. My family was always singing and drumming against things... I rarely see any of that around here. It鈥檚 kinda gloomy, really!鈥
鈥淚鈥檓 not a fan of that Brotherhood of Steel group... They say they鈥檙e preserving old technology, but they鈥檙e not really helping anybody or teaching anyone outside of their crew, are they?鈥
>> when trading (neutral)
鈥淪hoot... Which pocket did I put this in again?鈥
鈥淗old on, I think I lost... Nope, there it is.鈥
>> when trading (happy)
鈥淥h good! Do you have snacks?鈥
鈥淚 assure you I鈥檒l handle your things with the UTMOST care and attention. I even have a dust rag around here somewhere!鈥
>> when dismissed
鈥淥h, okay... I鈥檒l be in Rivet City if you need me!鈥
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lovely-aestheticcca year ago
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Promise?
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(Peter Parker X Reader)
AUTHOR鈥橲 NOTE:聽 First imagine!! I鈥檝e been wanting to start a tumblr blog for forever, so I鈥檓 really excited to finally get it done. I also have a wattpad account聽 (which is also called lovely-aestheticcc) where I will be posting these imagines as well, so please be sure to check it out if you are on that platform. I hope you enjoy!聽
DISCLAIMER: My work is not to be reposted anywhere without my expressed written consent. However, reblogging is not only appreciated, but also encouraged!聽+ I do NOT own MCU or any of the characters I write about!
SUMMARY: After Peter blows you off yet again, you go to his apartment to confront him, only to find out that your boyfriend isn't really just Peter Parker -- he's Spider-Man, too.
WARNINGS: Angst if you squint + fluffy ending!聽
WORD COUNT: 970
鉁 聽 聽 鉁 聽 聽 鉁
鈥淚鈥檓 gonna kill him. I swear, this time I鈥檓 actually gonna do it. I鈥檓 going to murder my boyfriend,鈥 you thought to yourself.
Usually, you were a pretty chill person. However, mix in an honors chemistry test that you now had less than fifteen hours to study for and the fact that your usually very dedicated boyfriend had blown you off for the third time this week -- not to mention it was only Wednesday. Not only that, but he was constantly always giving some kind of nonsense excuse, like鈥 鈥淥h I鈥檓 sorry baby, I promised Ned I鈥檇 finally help him build the lego death star,鈥 or 鈥淢ay said I鈥檝e been going out too much. Is it cool if we rain check?鈥 These excuses, and many, many others were precisely why you were practically marching your way up to Peter and May鈥檚 apartment.
Knocking on the apartment door, you cross your arms as you mentally prepare yourself to give Peter the scolding of his lifetime the second the door swings open. However, when it does, you come face to face with none other than his Aunt May. With a warm smile upon her face, she quickly ushered you into the apartment -- and into a big hug -- as she greeted you.
鈥淗i Y/N! I feel like I haven鈥檛 seen you in forever sweetie. How鈥檝e you been?鈥
Quickly plastering your own smile onto your face, you gave her a quick hug back as you replied.
鈥淗ey May! I鈥檝e been doing great actually. I hate to cut this short, but is Peter here? He promised he鈥檇 come by right after school, and now it鈥檚- 鈥
鈥6 o鈥檆lock.鈥 She cut you off with wide eyes. 鈥淲-what do you mean he didn鈥檛 come by? I swear that boy is gonna be the death of me, he鈥檚 always going somewhere or doing something without even telling me!鈥 She complained. 鈥淟ook hun, you can go stay in his room for now, I know you guys have to prepare for the chem test tomorrow. I鈥檓 gonna go try Peter鈥檚 cell, okay?鈥
Even though you knew that was practically hopeless seeing as you had already tried texting, calling, and snap-chatting him at least a dozen times today, you simply nodded. 鈥淭hanks May,鈥 you said whilst making your way towards his room.
鉁 聽 聽 鉁 聽 聽 鉁
Another hour had passed, and there was still no sign of Peter. If you weren鈥檛 worried already, you definitely were now. Your mind was racing nearly as fast as your heart as the worst things started to come to mind. 鈥淐ould he be cheating on me? I mean, I couldn鈥檛 see him ever doing something like that, but who knows? Oh God, what if something happened to him? At least before he鈥檇 give me some stupid reason why he couldn鈥檛 make it, but now, nothing!鈥
You were brought out of your mind and back to reality as you heard the window open, and saw a bruised and disoriented Peter stumbled into the room. Quickly standing up from the bed, you scampered over to him, questions immediately leaving your mouth. 鈥淧-Peter? What the hell happened to you? Are you okay? Why鈥檇 you come in through the window? Wait, what are you wearin-鈥 Your mouth instantly snapped shut as realization hit you. 鈥淵ou鈥檙e Spider-Man?鈥澛
Immediately, he began shaking his head as if it was the only thing he knew how to do. 鈥淣O!鈥 He practically exclaimed, 鈥淣o, no, no. Look Y/N, this isn鈥檛 what it looks like! I promise, I-I can explain.鈥 he rambled on as he took your hands in his own.
For a second there, you could've sworn that you actually saw red. 鈥漌hat do you mean it鈥檚 not what it looks like!?鈥 You whisper-shouted. As angry and upset as you were, you still had the sense to think that his Aunt May probably -- okay, definitely -- did not know that he was鈥 well, who he was.
Pushing his hands out of your own, your eyes widened as you say back on his bed, covering your face with the palms of your hand.聽
鈥滺ow could this not be what it looks like, Peter!? Because from what I'm seeing, it looks like you're the 鈥橣riendly Neighborhood Spider-Man鈥 you've been acting like you couldn't care any less about!鈥澛
He knelt down to be closer to where you were seated on his bed and nodded quickly, as if agreeing with you would make you feel better about the situation. 鈥滻 know, I know I've been lying and I've been secretive and I know you鈥檙e angry at me right now and you have every right to be. But please, baby, you have to understand. I only did it because I had to keep you safe. May doesn't even know, o-or Ned, and-鈥
Quickly, you pulled him close to you and cut him off with a kiss. As much as you hated the fact that he had to keep it from you, you could understand why he did. After all, you had always been a very 鈥檖ut yourself in their shoes鈥 kind of person.聽
As you kissed him passionately, you could have sworn you felt the relief flooding through Peter鈥檚 veins.
鈥滻鈥檓 not mad at you, baby; I get it, I promise.鈥 You reassured him. 鈥滱s much as I wish you didn't have to keep it from me, that's the last thing on my mind right now. I'm more worried about those bruises on your face, 鈥 you frowned at him as you caressed his cheek where a deep purple bruise was forming.聽
鈥漇o you're really not breaking up with me or anything? You're not mad, promise?鈥 He questioned with hopeful eyes.
Smiling brightly, you brought him in for a hug as you soothingly rubbed his back. 鈥滻 could never break up with you baby, I promise.鈥
鉁 聽 聽 鉁 聽 聽 鉁
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prettyoddfevera year ago
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why it鈥檚聽kind of funny that P!ATD is remembered as an emo band
For the record, I聽don鈥檛 really have an opinion on what the band should be called or what specific music labels involve. You can call Panic! at the Disco emo if you need to. I just think it鈥檚 funny now聽to look back on how much the band (especially Ryan Ross) hated being called emo in 2005 & 2006 and how some fans would get so聽frustrated with the label.
here鈥檚 a general idea of how the emo association evolved & why it stuck...
The Summer League was somewhat similar to Fall Out Boy, but then Ryan, Spencer, Brendon, & Brent chose to start Panic! at the Disco and write music that wasn鈥檛 like what everyone else was doing. They talked SO much about how they wanted to shake things up, challenge people, and generally do something聽different.聽Ironically, their main identity in the media got tied to Fall Out Boy early on because of the way they were signed. Some journalists had to write about P!ATD before the guys had released an album, so there wasn鈥檛 much easy info to go with besides the FOB connection. It looked like a couple writers decided P!ATD must therefore be emo or emo-punk if they were Fall Out Boy Jr... then everyone else who had to write something in fall 2005 must have referenced those few articles and everything snowballed from there. Ryan even told NME in late 2006聽鈥淚 think one writer started [that we鈥檙e emo]. We don鈥檛 even listen to emo.鈥
I think that was definitely the case in January & April 2006 when UK journalists were getting ready for the band鈥檚 arrival and looked to see what their image was in the USA.聽It felt like P!ATD was getting so big so fast that people were scrambling to write something and just referenced what others had already said (but then added even more emo enthusiasm). So basically the articles available about the band in early 2006 were mostly repeating each other and running with the initial label that came from the Fall Out Boy association.聽Tween magazines聽really didn鈥檛 help when they tried to market P!ATD as emo heartthrobs too. A lot of kids were introduced to the band through that lens.
Ryan to MTV:聽"It's a bummer to realize we're in Teen Beat magazine and read some sh---y article they've written about us being an emo-punk band. I've seen those kids at the shows, I can hear them, and I can certainly tell the difference between one of our fans and a Fall Out Boy fan who's just there because they heard we were hot."
I think another thing that helped solidify the emo image was the very public聽feud with The Killers & Fall Out Boy that P!ATD got dragged into. It started in early fall 2005 when P!ATD was on their first tour (right before AFYCSO was released) and continued to build until late summer 2006 (although it kept being brought up in interviews long after that). Basically, Brandon Flowers was warning people about how dangerous 鈥渆mo鈥 bands like Fall Out Boy & P!ATD were. And then Brandon later admitted that he鈥檇 never actually listened to P!ATD, so even he was judging them based on what he knew about Fall Out Boy. When NME asked Ryan if he thought the emo label was insulting, Ryan replied聽鈥渋t鈥檚 ignorant.鈥
In January 2006 Ryan told Big Cheese 鈥淚 don鈥檛 know what it is, people just want to compare us to [Fall Out Boy.] It鈥檚 getting to the point where we just want to be known as Panic! at the Disco.鈥 Pete was also in Rolling Stone around this time hyping P!ATD by saying they鈥檙e 鈥渓ike the Killers meets Fall Out Boy meets the Faint.鈥 So that probably didn鈥檛 help. Here鈥檚 another article that interviewed Ryan & talked about the emo misunderstanding:聽
鈥淢ost interviews we do we only get asked about Fall Out Boy,鈥 notes Ross with more than a hint of disappointment and anger in his voice. 鈥楤ecause of that people do not actually know what we are like and I have heard rumors that we are a manufactured pop band because of that.鈥 Musically misunderstood, the band鈥檚 ever-growing fan base are getting an increasingly distorted vision of the boys鈥︹
Most fans I heard from online in late 2005 & early 2006 were so聽frustrated & confused by the inaccurate emo label for P!ATD. However, by spring 2006 there was a group of new fans who had discovered the band through the Fall Out Boy association, tween magazines, MTV, or another media source. Those fans considered themselves emo and were content with viewing the band through that lens. And I suppose it鈥檚 nice to have a quick label... journalists who recognized that the band wasn鈥檛 emo usually had to work so聽hard to invent some kind of genre for them.聽AOL had categorized P!ATD as emo, punk-pop, and punk revival, but got complaints from both P!ATD fans and the punk crowd saying that the labels were inaccurate.聽
side note: there were SO many labels being pinned on the band 鈥 emo was just one of them.
A few journalists were definitely pointing out that P!ATD seemed to be influenced by a range of older eras and had little to do music-wise with the current emo scene. I didn鈥檛 care too much about labels or trying to fit something into a box... but I did care that the emo label seemed to really frustrate Ryan at times. He had been working SO hard to do something different.聽
By summer 2006 some fans were getting even more frustrated with the more frequent emo, emo-punk, emo-pop, etc kinds of labels, but I had basically given up and accepted that the mistake couldn鈥檛 be undone since the band had surged towards international fame so quickly. 鈥淓mo鈥澛爓ould be linked to the band in any google search now and it had mostly come from journalists who didn鈥檛 know much about the band besides the FOB association and whatever other news sources had written. I think it also didn鈥檛 help that the guys started wearing eyeliner, skinny jeans, and getting haircuts that made them look like they belonged in the Warped Tour scene (even though they turned down the opportunity to do that). It sounded like the band got a stylist in mid-2006 who seemed to be playing into the media鈥檚 image too (especially at the VMAs), so the guys did look pretty emo in the last part of the Fever era.
More & more new fans identified as emo, so I thought that label ended up being less of a big deal within the fandom by 2007. It especially became less of a big deal when the band drastically changed their image for the Pretty. Odd. era.聽I鈥檓 only talking about how frustrating the emo label was to both the band and most fans at first.
SOME RELEVANT INTERVIEW QUOTES FROM 2006:
Ryan to Big Cheese in early 2006: 鈥渨e鈥檝e been called an emo band before, which is a little off the wall. I don鈥檛 really see anything in the lyrics that鈥檚 鈥榚mo.鈥欌
Ryan to Aquarian Weekly in spring 2006: 聽鈥淓veryone is so quick to label things, and I guess people think we鈥檙e emo because of some of the bands we have toured with are what they would call emo, but we don鈥檛 think that鈥檚 what we are.鈥
Ryan to AMP in May 2006:聽 鈥淚 think that people think that they have us pinned. They鈥檒l classify us as an emo band or a pop-punk band or this or that. And even beyond music, too. It used to bother us but now we鈥檙e kind of getting used to it.鈥
Nylon: Ryan, do you hate Panic! being tagged as an emo band? Ryan: It鈥檚 pretty limiting, because we have so many other influences. Queen are my favorite band. And Counting Crows and Pink Floyd. (side note -- I love how by spring 2006 Brendon had influenced Ryan to love Queen more, and Ryan had influenced Brendon to love the Amelie soundtrack).
from People Magazine in fall 2006: 鈥淲e're not pop or punk or emo. I think emo takes itself too seriously.鈥
from the September 2006 Blender article: for Ross, emo has become a dirty word. 鈥淚t鈥檚 almost an insult,鈥 he says. 鈥淲e鈥檝e totally exceeded emo, which is so stagnant. Not to be cocky, but those bands aren鈥檛 thinking outside the box.鈥
Brendon to a New Zealand magazine in October 2006:聽鈥淲e don鈥檛 think of ourselves as emo at all. Definitely not. We鈥檙e generally based in rock music, which is such a broad term. But to us [emo is]聽just a label that fits a lot of bands that are really bad. So it鈥檚 an insulting thing to be called emo.鈥
Brendon to NME in October 2006:聽鈥淓mo is bullshit! If people want to take it for the literal sense of the word, yes we鈥檙e an emotional band, we put a lot of thought into what we do. People always try to stereotype us, but we don鈥檛 fit the emo stereotype.鈥澛(NME put the isolated聽鈥渆mo is bullshit!鈥 quote on their cover).
To AbsolutePunk towards the end of 2006... Brendon:聽NME thrives on beef. The writer spent two days with us trying to get us to talk shit about My Chem, the Killers and Fall Out Boy and what he got out of us was a quote taken out of context.聽 Spencer:聽I would hope that if someone likes our band that likes emo, they would continue to like us even if we don鈥檛 consider ourselves emo. Brendon didn鈥檛 mean emo bands are bullshit, he meant emo is a bullshit term because its so vague.鈥
GAFFA summed it up in late 2006 by saying聽鈥淭hrough the entire music history, the music that young people listen to has been put into boxes with a genre label to make it easier for outsiders and the media, but often the titles are quite misleading.鈥 Brendon also told them that 鈥渢he world emo is quite insulting.鈥
I didn鈥檛 follow My Chemical Romance, but I still saw some of their interviews where they were also confused why some journalists were trying to lump them in with Fall Out Boy & P!ATD since all three bands were doing different things. Gerard Way told GAFFA:
鈥淚 really can鈥檛 see the comparison between bands like us, AFI, Fall Out Boy and Panic! Of course we鈥檙e all inspired by a lot of the same things, and we share a dark and theatrical aesthetic, but other than that, I don鈥檛 think we鈥檙e alike. Is it just because we wear eyeliner?鈥
MCR was dealing with legit attacks against their fans for being emo, though, so that was a whole other scene.
One fan wrote a letter to an editor in fall 2006 to kindly explain that Panic! at the Disco and the majority of their fanbase hated the inaccurate emo label. The editor actually replied and said she didn鈥檛 think it was wrong even if the band thought so lol.聽
AMP wrote in early summer 2006:聽鈥淚t鈥檚 an argument that seems to have escaped most knee-jerk critics and loudmouthed messageboard denizens but, in a lot of ways, it鈥檚 possible that Panic! at the Disco have more in common with a band like the Strokes than most of their contemporaries in the post-emo punk scene.鈥
The band鈥檚 Fever-era costumes聽also made it pretty clear that they were reaching for older eras & doing their own thing instead of trying to be part of the current music scene (like they鈥檇 been saying all along).
The guys in P!ATD were a bit better with polite,聽鈥渃orrect鈥 interview answers by 2008 and were way聽more chill about the whole emo label.
SOME ARTICLE EXCERPTS & QUOTES FROM 2008:
A June 2008 article in The Guardian:聽It's debatable whether Panic were ever really "emo" in the first place鈥 The emo tag stems from their association with Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz, the impresario of emo... whose own fans provided Panic's initial audience.聽
BBC: Has your new album Pretty. Odd. put the 'emo' tag attached to you to bed? P!ATD: 鈥淲e haven't been asked about that in a long time. With this new record our main goal was to make people open their eyes and view us as a band and not really as a specific trend.鈥
Rock Mag:聽Last time you said "Emo is bullshit.鈥 Did you change your looks to distance yourselves even more from that scene? Spencer:聽鈥淓xactly. We never considered ourselves as emo and it really bothered us that we were stuck in it.鈥
Ultimate Guitar: I don't necessarily think the label emo applies to the band... There are some who did place that label on the band when you first came onto the scene. Did that bother you? Ryan:聽鈥淚 guess it didn't offend us. It just felt like it was a misplaced word for our band... It was just sort of this fad that was coming up. Being a new band, people were trying to call it emo. That was the thing to do. I guess people are going to call you whatever they're going to call you. We still wrote the same songs we were going to write on this album, and people can call it emo or they can call it rock and roll. It doesn't really change the song. So it is whatever it is.鈥
an excerpt from Nylon: [Pretty. Odd.] constitutes an attempt by the band to distance themselves from their emo poster-boy past, a tag Ross insists was聽鈥渁 little off鈥澛燼nyways.
Jon to College Candy:聽鈥渨e don鈥檛 have a description of what we are. We just kinda write songs and they sound like our band.鈥
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infodumping-on-main12 months ago
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Can you talk about Neurology? I need something good today I'm about to failing my chem exam so...a friend being exited will have to do :P
I gotchu聽
Actually, it鈥檚 because of my neurology and the lack of academic accommodations for it that I failed my chem exam and subsequently the class.聽鈥溾漗^
Anyway, maybe you鈥檒l know a lot of this stuff and maybe you won鈥檛, but here goes:
The line where psychology stops and neurology starts is often hard to define. Since so much of neurology and psychology is a mix of both nature and nurture, sometimes folks get misdiagnosed with the wrong things. This isn鈥檛 helped by the fact that so many practitioners are older and working off of what they were taught in like,,,, the 80鈥瞫-90鈥瞫. Even the early 2000鈥瞫 was a bit behind in terms of psychology and neurology (hence why my brother got diagnosed as autistic when we were kids and I didn鈥檛).
Comorbid disorders and conditions are fairly common, especially with neurodiversity, I myself am diagnosed as autistic and I have ADHD, chronic depression,聽鈥渁nxiety (unspecified)鈥 (I don't agree with this one but I鈥檒l come back to that), and gender dysphoria. (Gender dysphoria being more of a symptom, in my opinion, rather than a whole disorder on its own, but I digress.)
I mention this blurred line between psychology and neurology because it becomes difficult to hash out which conditions people have and which symptoms belong to which of their conditions. For example, I have dealt with severe executive dysfunction most of my life. Executive dysfunction is a symptom of ADHD and depression (and autism too, in some cases). So it was really a guessing game of which condition could be causing this symptom.
Due to the fact that I wasn鈥檛 diagnosed as ADHD until this year, everyone (including me) assumed it was just my depression. However, when my antidepressant (Wellbutrin) started working wonders on my depressive symptoms, I noticed that the executive dysfunction wasn鈥檛 going away. That lead me to believe it might be my ADHD instead and I am now trying Adderall in addition to my other medications.
I don鈥檛 agree with my anxiety diagnosis because a lot of my anxiety was caused by gender dysphoria and how the world treats autistics. I hated being perceived in public as female and therefore felt extreme anxiety and apprehension being in public. Furthermore, due to my inability to cope with quick changes and not understanding most social cues, I landed myself in many situations that were anxiety inducing for me. Since I have been on testosterone and have better understood my autism, my anxiety has become almost nonexistent.
Excuse me while I shift gears for a moment:
Especially those of you studying psychology and/or neurology (I don鈥檛 care if you鈥檙e learning it in school or not), don鈥檛 be afraid to gently educate your evaluator if you think they鈥檙e using outdated diagnostic criteria.
Of course, bluntly calling them out might make them cross with you, so be weary of that. No one wants to see you go without a diagnosis on paper if you鈥檙e needing one (I consider self-diagnosis to be valid).聽
But sometimes, you may need to educate your evaluator to help them see that your symptoms are worth considering. It sucks, I know, but it鈥檚 how myself and a lot of others have secured their diagnoses. My evaluator鈥檚 image of autism was just a small, nonverbal white boy who had no friends and played with trains. I wish I were exaggerating.聽
And once you get that shiny diagnosis on a piece of paper? Go get accommodations if you feel safe doing so. Don鈥檛 let guilt or pride stop you, especially in academia. Getting accommodations can be more difficult in a job setting because ableism permeates every level of capitalism, but do your best to get accommodations and keep your job.聽
You deserve help in a world that wasn鈥檛 built for you. You鈥檙e not getting聽鈥渦nfair advantages鈥 by accessing accommodations, you鈥檙e leveling the playing field. You鈥檙e playing with neurotypicals and able-bodied folks on their own turf and a lot of them don鈥檛 like you having accommodations if it means you can compete with them. Don't give the ableists that satisfaction. If you won鈥檛 secure accommodations for yourself, then at least try doing it to spite the abelists.聽
Disclaimer: Make sure it is safe for you to pursue accommodations with your institution before you start. A close friend of mine lost his job because they didn鈥檛 want to accommodate his disability. (They did this in an extremely sneaky way so my friend can鈥檛 prove that his disability was the reason he was fired.) People can and do lose their jobs over this, so be careful. And try to report any malpractice if you can.
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dorkylittleweirdoa year ago
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crazy shit that happened during high school
freshman year:
my favorite teacher (pe coach) ended up being a pedophile. it鈥檚 kinda scary to think about bc like,, that was my favorite teacher and i trusted him and if he tried anything with me i don鈥檛 think i would鈥檝e stopped him and just yikes. but yeah, it was a whole thing. once the school found out they got the police involved and he fled the state. they got him in the end but i mean,, i spent a lot of time in the secretary鈥檚 office crying about it bc i really trusted that dude and i was distraught over it. that might鈥檝e been where my trust issues started??? fun stuff
my school shut down. like i mean,, bc it was a charter school and we had to get the charter renewed. but the board at my school wasn鈥檛 using their money the way they were supposed to. it was a whole thing, like the principal left that school year bc he knew what was happening, couldn鈥檛 stop them from doing it, and didn鈥檛 want to be part of it. so they had a lot of meetings that us kids were allowed to go to so we could see what was happening and all that. i only went to one and it was A Time bc the lady who was recording everything passed tf out and of course nobody was a doctor and my pipsqueak thirteen year old ass went聽鈥渋 know what to do鈥 bc i Did so i had to help her which was a trip in and of itself. but anyways, the school鈥檚 charter got denied, and everyone had to transfer, but the district promised that we could go to any school we wanted, not just the one we would have to go to by zip code
sophomore year:
i ended up going to a private christian school. big fucking mistake. absolute disaster. nothing really happened that was crazy by their standards, but it was for me
so they have a house system. think of harry potter, it鈥檚 EXACTLY like that. we have points, we have competitions, we have all that extra stuff. it was such a time, like i don鈥檛,, i don鈥檛 even know how to explain how fucking weird that shit was
i came out in the middle of class. the principal鈥檚 daughter was our sub and she goes聽鈥渙kay so everyone is gonna tell us something that nobody knows about them鈥 so when it was my turn i go聽鈥渟o it鈥檚 not a secret and y鈥檃ll should know this but clearly y鈥檃ll don鈥檛: i鈥檓 not straight鈥. silence. dead silence. we could hear the class next to us it was so quiet. some girl whispers聽鈥渋 knew it鈥. another girl leans over and whispers to my friend聽鈥渋鈥檓 so sorry鈥. principal鈥檚 daughter gives me the most threatening, condescending smile i鈥檝e ever seen and goes聽鈥渢hanks for sharing鈥. i had to come out to my mom that same day bc i told me friends and they panicked on my behalf bc when people found out that they were gay, the principal told their parents. and i was Not about to be outed by the principal. my mom has since told me that the principal never contacted her about it so i came out for nothing but i mean i really like being out so we鈥檙e good
so instead of prom, cult school has this thing called聽鈥渢he ball鈥. sophomores, juniors, and seniors are allowed to go bc there鈥檚 less than fifty people per grade so if sophomores don鈥檛 come, there鈥檚 not enough people. so i went bc my friends were all going and i was like聽鈥測eah why not might as well鈥. three dance lessons. three fucking dance lessons for this stupid ball that i didn鈥檛 dance once at. i literally had three panic attacks in the span of an hour at the second one, and then i had swim practice right after. fucking exhausted. felt like i ran five marathons by the time i got home. the last lesson i didn鈥檛 do any dancing, just vibed with my friend in the corner. so at the actual ball, same friend and i vibed at the tables the whole time. we went to the bathroom for like an hour and took mirror selfies and tried to make our asses look bigger bc we鈥檙e Like That
SO AFTER THE BALL, there was apparently a massive party and there was alcohol and stuff. so my friends and i were blissfully unaware bc nobody liked us bc who tf likes the school sinners. so we walked to get ice cream after in our fucking ballgowns and suits looking like All That. so the principal thought that it was one of us who hosted the party and we were like聽鈥??? what party?鈥. literally almost got in trouble bc the principal thought we were LYING. i told my mom and she takes No Shit, so when the principal called her demanding to know if i went to/hosted the party, she marched her ass down to the school and was like聽鈥渋 know y鈥檃ll have something against mexicans and people who are different from y鈥檃ll, but that鈥檚 no reason to blame my daughter for something that your so called聽鈥減erfect鈥 students did鈥. my mom got Heated, roasted the fuck out of the principal, then LEFT. principal never fucked with my mom after that
so there was a fire like across the street from the school. the fd told us to evacuate, but noooooo the school was like聽鈥済od will protect us鈥 i鈥檓 like聽鈥渙kay but i鈥檓 gay and apparently your god hates that so i think we鈥檙e gonna Perish鈥. the fucking POWER went out and they STILL wouldn鈥檛 let us go. my mom called to sign me out so i could go wherever the fuck i wanted in the school until my friend鈥檚 dad came to pick us up bc she couldn鈥檛 get there bc of the fire. so i vibed next door to my friends鈥 class and i was like聽鈥渉eeeeey god鈥檚 trying to kill the gays鈥 and we laughed about that until my gay ass got saved lmaoooo
okay so this is the funniest memory i have. in chemistry once, our teacher took us outside and started digging a lil hole next to the school. and keep in mind, my chem teacher used to be a hardcore atheist druggie, like fucking meth and coke and shit. took a theology course and converted. so he鈥檚 really sweet and nice but he鈥檚 also Slightly mad scientist vibes. so anyways, he puts something in this little hole, lights it on fire. i forgot why he did it, but i was standing back with him and one of the exchange students and the three of us watch in Horror as the rest of the class makes a circle around the fire and start doing some weird dance and saying something. it wasn鈥檛 like a chant, idk what to call it, but they were like counting like聽鈥渁nd one, and two, and three, and four鈥 and then the dance would get more intense and they鈥檇 get louder. so eventually they were screaming and going apeshit and i looked at my teacher and he鈥檚 just,, watching them do this. i鈥檓 like聽鈥渁nd i鈥檓 satan, huh?鈥. like these kids really trying to summon the devil but i鈥檓 the bad one bc i like girls
junior year:
so technically this was during the summer but i鈥檓 putting it here. they have like a house party after the school year ends. i made cookies. apparently they聽鈥渓ooked weird鈥 so nobody ate them, two of my soon to be teachers kept insulting them. i called my mom to pick me up, took my cookies with me, got back in the car in tears. had to have a whole conversation with the principal and those two teachers so they could apologize bc i wanted to leave the school after that. dw tho, i took my cookies to the guards at my summer camp and they appreciated the hell out of them bc they were Very Good Cookies
so my ap bio teacher was an enabler. i was his favorite bc i wasn鈥檛 a religious nut and it was very obvious that i believed in science and not whatever the hell this cult was doing with their creationist bs. also he was a parasitologist and i鈥檓 super into parasitology so he had fun talking about it to someone who both understood and was extremely interested in the topic. i rolled up to class one day like聽鈥渉ey so i鈥檓 gonna buy hissing cockroaches from amazon, if my parents find out and don鈥檛 let me keep them do you want them??鈥 and he鈥檚 like聽鈥測eah鈥. i brought them to class a few times and everyone Hated it but my teacher was like ayyyyy. and everyone thought he was either and atheist or agnostic, so when some girl asked how he thought mary conceived jesus to see what he said, he looked at me like聽鈥測鈥檃ll hear somethin/hel p鈥 and i go聽鈥減arthenogenesis鈥 and he Went With It, talking about how it was theoretically possible in humans but we ignored the fact that the baby would鈥檝e been a girl bc the class is dumb none of them have ever heard of parthenogenesis before jesus is the true trans icon we all need
my art teacher was my favorite and she knows that i鈥檓 gay. she鈥檚 the only teacher from my school that i鈥檓 still in contact with. so every big project we did, i made it gay. and i knew, and my friends knew, and she knew, but the rest of the class had no idea. i鈥檓 like presenting my project and the class would get sus and they鈥檙e like聽鈥渟o are those two really good friends鈥 and i鈥檓 like聽鈥渟o she has a rainbow heart on her choker and she has a lesbian symbol on her shirt鈥. the class was still confused and my friend yells聽鈥渢hey鈥檙e LESBIANS鈥. it was iconic
my brit lit teacher was bi. she never said it, but i know she was. always talked about how much she hated men, then was like聽鈥渨omen are very very good鈥. no way this woman was straight. so we read dracula and it鈥檚 got that Subtext, so one time i leaned over to my friend bc he sat next to me and i go聽鈥渢he Homoerotic Subtext鈥. and i didn鈥檛 realize that the teacher was right in front of me until she tapped my desk and goes聽鈥渋t gets better鈥, told me a page number that i flipped to, and it was Even More Gay and i was like聽馃槒. also she assigned me a gay poet for my poetry project and i talked about that for my whole presentation in front of the class and it was the biggest paragraph in my essay and i got 100% on it even tho i choked at the beginning. also i mentioned in passing that i liked sappho and she goes聽鈥渙oh i love sappho鈥 i鈥檓 like聽鈥渕a鈥檃m please leave this cult and get you a gf鈥
senior year:
i left the cult finally. went to the one school i actually liked. i made friends who actually like me and they were patient and they were amazing and i love them all very much even if i鈥檒l never tell them. my classmates were great, v friendly, i had a great time. however,
so many fires. school got cancelled like five times bc of how bad the fires were
the school shooting. i don鈥檛 think i need to go further into that, it鈥檚 pretty self explanatory
covid. again, don鈥檛 need to go further into that, v self explanatory
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nad-zetaa year ago
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Matchup!聽聽(鈼曖礂鈼曗溈)
Hi :3 Can I request an Ikesen matchup??鈾ワ笍馃崱
I鈥檓 ~164cm,straight, slightly chubby and have long straight brown hair and I have darn brown eyes c:. I鈥檓 also a Scorpio, ENTJ or ENFJ and I鈥檓 like kinda Slytherin or Ravenclaw.
I鈥檓 hardworking, competitive, and ambitious. I鈥檓 also quite observant, independent and mature. I would consider myself an ambivert? Cause sometimes I would be really sociable and talkative but sometimes I just want to stay in bed and read a book c:. I鈥檓 always cheerful and optimistic and I already look at things positively (like a half full kind of thing). I also can鈥檛 hide my emotions well and I鈥檝e been told that how I feel is always written on my face. I also hate people beating around the bush or sugar coating something, I prefer the truth hence me always being blunt. But when I get serious I tend to be scary? Like I wouldn鈥檛 tolerate anymore bs and I would be extremely blunt and set things straight. People tell me the difference is like night and day. Idk but I know I鈥檓 just weird :p
I also have a really weird taste in food, like I can eat a lot of spice and I tend to try weird food combinations even if there is a risk it won鈥檛 be nice. And I cook a lot! I also have a sweet tooth so I would always bake different kinds of pastries and sweets.
I really enjoy music, especially singing and playing the guitar! I also like reading (especially fantasy and mythology), drawing in an anime style or creating rotoscope animation and taking notes. I also really like kpop but I鈥檝e been into Japanese music recently. I think I do quite well in school where I always get a 3.5 GPA and above in my subjects (I鈥檓 a science stream student so I take bio, chem, math). I really like romance and comedy and I really really REALLY HATE horror movies.
In terms of my emotions I tend to express it when I need to but there are cases where I conceal it and try to smile so that I wouldn鈥檛 bother them but at a certain point I鈥檒l just suddenly burst into tears, this usually happens when I鈥檓 stressed. But when someone needs help, I would always be there and give a solution first then comforting them later.
So yeah, that鈥檚 all :3 I鈥檓 sorry it鈥檚 kinda messy and long but there鈥檚 no rush 鈥硷笍 Take care 鈾ワ笍馃崏鈥硷笍 And THANK YOU 馃挅馃尭馃崶
Hi hi, love! 鉂ゐ煂籘hank you so much for the request! Sorry for taking soooo freaken long with this!馃槺鉂ゐ煂 Hehehe hope you are keeping safe and well and I hope you enjoy this dear! @aashleymayyy鈥 馃尰鉂ゐ煂
So I match you with鈥︹︹︹.. Ieyasu
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When you arrived in Azuchi, it was as if a hurricane arrived with you. You were cheery and upbeat, quickly making friends with everyone, well all but Ieyasu. You reminded him waaaay too much of Mitsunari, and for that reason, he stayed far away from you. He didn鈥檛 need another beam of sunshine shining down on him with their endless optimism and positivity, or so he thought.
The day started out like any other and you were working hard around the castle as per usual. The maid loved working with you as you seemed to introduce them to new improved was of cleaning plus, your hard work motivated them to work even harder, so that work would get done pretty quickly every day.聽
You made your way to the castle Archive as you have hundreds of times before. You low key was hoping to see Mitsunari there, to discuss the new book you had been reading. You were so lost in thought as you walked through the hallway that you bumped straight into Ieyasu. The pair of you went tumbling down onto the floor, with him having broken your fall, as you were now on top of the prickly porcupine. This was the first time you had ever seen his eyes, big vibrant green eyes widened when he realized that the two of you were nose to nose. You couldn鈥檛 hide the blush spreading over your face. Even though Ieyasu avoided you like the plague, you couldn鈥檛 help but be attracted to him, there was just something about him that had you captivated.聽
None of you made an attempt to move, both of you blushing furiously, when all of a sudden Masamune appeared out of nowhere and started teasing the two of you, 鈥淲ow Ieyasu if I knew you would move this quick to win the lass鈥 affections, I would have pounced long ago, oooh well I guess I will just have to steal her away from you then,鈥 he said with a wink. You didn鈥檛 think it was possible to go any redder. You looked back at Ieyasu apologetically, and as you moved to get up, you lost your balance spraining your ankle.聽
Ieyasu simply let out a long sigh, 鈥済eeez first you pushing me down on the ground and now you go around hurting yourself, just how clumsy can one person be.鈥 Before you could quip back, he picked you up and carried you to his manor. He couldn鈥檛 help but give a slither of a smile, as one look at your face gave away your every thought. He gently placed you down on his futon and started gathering up herbs to make you a salve for your ankle, to soothe the pain and swelling. As he was treating your injury, your eyes drifted out to his garden, and you couldn鈥檛 help but break out into a big smile at the sight of a baby fawn nibbling on the grass outside. You then stuck up a conversation with the porcupine, asking him all about the deer prancing around outside.聽
After he patched you up, he put on some tea, and the two of you continued to chat over tea. At first talking to Yasu was like talking to a brick wall, but soon he started opening up a little, which made you beam in delight.
The next day you decided to cook something for Yasu as a thank you for patching you up and as an apology for falling on him. Your ankle was feeling good as new when you woke up that morning, so you decided to do your chores and then get cooking. You found Masamune finishing up in the kitchen and decided to ask his advice on the best dish would be to make the resident hedgehog.聽
You basically skipped your way over to Ieyasu鈥檚 manor carrying an array of spicy foods. When Masamune revealed that Ieyasu liked spicy foods you were over the moon, it was not common to find a fellow spice lover. Ieyasu鈥檚 maids let you in and led you to his room, you gave a small knock and then entered in. At the sight of you, he rolled his eyes, 鈥渄on鈥檛 tell me you hurt yourself again, also didn鈥檛 I tell you to rest your ankle today,鈥 he said in a cold tone although, the look of concern in his eyes definitely didn鈥檛 escape your observations. Ignoring the blunt tone you sat down in front of him and presented him with the thank you/apology gift. His eyes widened slightly in shock; he didn鈥檛 expect you to come all this way to give him a gift.聽
He grumbled a thank you and put on some tea. The two of you sat and sipped on tea, enjoying the spicy food together. As you sat and ate, you spotted an array of mythological fantasy books on Ieyasu;s bookcase. You were buzzing in excitement. Ieyasu simply blushed and looked away, reading fantasy books was a bit of a guilty pleasure for him, 鈥測ou can come over and borrow them sometime if you like them that much, but you better not tell the others or else.鈥澛
In the weeks to follow you spent more and more time at Ieyasu鈥檚 manor, it was just so quiet and peaceful there, and his room always radiated a warm, comforting aura. Often you would sit quietly in his room and read his collection of books. This had become such a regular occurrence that you have even claimed a spot in his room as your own, it was the spot on a comfy yellow chair in front of a big window overlooking the garden.聽
When Ieyasu needed a break, he would make the two of you some tea or the two of you would go out to a teahouse for some sweets and tea. Through all this time spent together, you got to know Yasu a bit better.
You loved his blunt, truthful personality. He would say things as they are, without sugar-coating it. Yes, he was contrary, but you had soon come to find out that it was just his defence mechanism, and thanks to your observational skills, you could easily decipher what he was thinking.聽
Ieyasu loved that that expressive face of yours. He loved the way your thoughts and emotions flickered across your face like lighting. What did Ieyasu also find incredibly amusing during your time together, well that would be your weird food combinations.聽
Often after spending the day reading at his manor, it would get too late to go back to the castle, so Ieyasu set up a room just for you. Which meant the two of you would have dinner together. You loved to cook so even when you would have your meals at the castle you would always insist on cooking your own foods. Ieyasu, after writing his last report, would find you in his kitchen cooking up some weird creation. He usually can鈥檛 help the small smile forming on his lips as he watched you. Most days he would sit on the counter top or simply pull up a chair and watch you cook keeping you company. He would always laugh when a weird combination would fail, and you would pull the funniest of faces at the vile taste.聽
Ieyasu loved your cooking and would always eat up everything with that faint smile on his face. If it truly was a flop, he would laugh and let you know his honest opinion, causing both of you to laugh and then cook up a different dish together. Speaking of cooking Ieyasu always has something sweet on hand when he knows you are coming over for a visit or to read. He has come to realize you have a sweet tooth and will be sure to present you with different sweets or pastries during each your visits. Even though he doesn鈥檛 have much of a sweet tooth, he will always indulge in the delicious pastries you make for him.
Truth is, the more this boy spent with you the more he fell utterly and entirely in love with you. He loved that you could relate to him with regards to being ambitious and competitive.聽
Your optimism and warm, cheerful personality actually helped him to heal and grow from his past traumas. You had quickly become the bright light in his dark word, your endless amounts of optimism pulling him out of the pit of despair and back into the sunshine. You had shown him that there was strength in love and positivity, and lately, he had found himself smiling like a fool whenever you were around him.
He also loved that you, like him, was rather blunt, although it seemed that you were slightly blunter then him when it came to matters of the heart. Like one day, when you found out that the Oda forces were going off to war, you decided it was time to confess your feelings. Ieyasu came to your room the night before their departure. Honestly, things were getting awkward, so you spoke up, 鈥淚eyasu can we please cut through the bs, I鈥檓 just gonna come right out and say it, I freaken love you and well if you don鈥檛 feel the same way that okay, but I just鈥︹ you didn鈥檛 even have time to finisher your sentence when you were suddenly pulled into his strong warm embrace, lips covering your own in a sweet kiss. 鈥淕eez with that scary, intimidating face from earlier I thought you were going to tell me you hate me or something,鈥 he joked before pulling you back for another kiss. It was true whenever you would get serious your face would turn scary, not that Ieyasu minded all he cared about at that moment was having the love of his life in his arms.
Whenever Yasu would go off to war you would always sneak in a few small anime style doodles for him to find, to remind you just how much you loved and missed him. You would always be surprised when you would get clumsily drawn doodles back whenever a scout would deliver war reports and updates to the castle.
As the two of you continued into your relationship Yasu couldn鈥檛 help but fall more and more in love with you. He loved that you were mature and independent, always there to offer him real and proper solutions to problems before comforting. Even though Ieyasu was slightly shy when it came to his emotions, he instantly knew whenever you were faking a smile or upset. That fake smile could never fool him as he would gently pull you into his arms and in the sweetest of voices, ask you what was wrong. Of course, you would always burst out into tears, as you low key had a tendency to bottle things up. Yasu would simply be there, an ear to listen to your every problem, tenderly stroking your back as you spoke and giving you small sweet kisses as you would tell him you every burden.
With Yasu you can expect loads of sweet cute kisses on the nose and forehead.聽
Often the two of you cuties are simply sitting together nestled in each other arms, each reading their own book. If the two of you aren鈥檛 enjoying a quiet evening in, you are laughing and cooking your new spicing creations together for dinner.聽
Ieyasu can鈥檛 help but thank his lucky stars every night for having met you. Every night without fail as you gently drift to sleep in his arms, he will pull you close to his body and trail small kisses from your head, forehead, nose, eyelids, cheeks and finally lips while whispering in the most tender of voices how much he loves and adores you.
Other potential matches鈥︹︹︹︹.. Shingen聽
I hope you have the best day! Sending you lots of hugs!聽鉂ゐ煂火煢
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firefighterpanikkar10 months ago
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7, 10, 16!
thanks, Johanna!!!聽
7) what never fails to put a smile on your face?
sitting outside in the sun and reading a book, scrolling through my phone, or even just watching the birds and whatnot :) (have you ever seen a cat sunbathing? just like that tbh)
10) talk about your favorite teacher?
lol here鈥檚 another ramble, hope you don鈥檛 mind :P
I have two, but the most recent one was my ochem professor last year.聽
I hate chem. like, I thoroughly despise it. about once a month, I reconsider my decision to go into medicine because just seeing a hexagon activates my fight-or-flight response. and i鈥檓 usually pretty bad at it too 鈥 no matter how much I try, all the information I try to learn just goes in through one ear and out the other.聽
the particular ochem course this professor was teaching was notorious for being the most聽difficult out of all the chem/ochem/biochem courses a life sciences/premed student at my college has to take. and I didn't do very well in the prerequisite class, so I definitely went into this one scared out of my mind and also prepared to sit through three months of pure hell.聽
but guys. I don鈥檛 know what this professor did or what, but she seemed to sense what resources all her different students would need 鈥 in a 300+ class, mind you 鈥 and聽she really went out of her way to personally聽help as many students as she possibly could: by the end of the course, she was on a first-name basis with nearly everyone.聽
without going into too much detail (because this can and will turn into an essay, otherwise), I may have been terrified going into the class, but I left with the knowledge that this is a subject that I actually do have the ability to learn and master with just a little practice 鈥 and for someone whose confidence was rock-bottom earlier, that was a huge thing. And that鈥檚 kind of what I was getting at in my earlier ask as well; I have literally never had a professor care this聽much about her students (and genuinely don鈥檛 believe I will again), but just knowing that an educator believes in you and will do anything to help you succeed really does do wonders for a struggling student.聽
16) what鈥檚 your go-to meal when you feel down?
when I鈥檓 at school, probably something super unhealthy and full of carbs and goodness like a frozen lasagna or baked mac & cheese or even cup noodles 馃構 now that I鈥檓 home, though, I鈥檓 getting spoiled w having my mom (and her uncanny ability to sense when I鈥檓 in A Mood) around to make limbu rasam (like a lemon/tomato-y broth and rice) or some other Indian comfort food whenever I need it鈥unno what I鈥檓 going to do when I move back to college, tbh.
positivity asks
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knightofamerisa year ago
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bdsjenskfkskw goodmorning :]
small update on chem boy: i hate how much we get along. last night he told me 鈥渋鈥檓 not going anywhere鈥 and i wasn鈥檛 even exactly worried about him leaving in the first place (tho i will admit it was 1am and i was word vomiting to him about how we鈥檙e complete opposites and how that scares me bc there鈥檚 never been anyone like him in my life before) and i think i might have to marry him if he doesn鈥檛 stop. also he literally has to ignore my texts in order to sleep because apparently i KeEp DiStrAcTinG hiM and hes staying up way later than usual bc of me. smh
how are you? :O i haven鈥檛 been active like. at all. and i am so sorry hdjsndsnw did you watch the newest haikyuu episode because i screamed sm for hinata anyways how鈥檚 the boba over in cali? bfksenks btwbtwbtw you should get passionfruit flavored boba next time. or lychee. there鈥檚 no reason lol they鈥檙e just some of my favorites and i haven鈥檛 had boba in forever LOL also!! also also!!! ONCE AGAIN UR SO PRETTY :) i feel so blessed with ur face hehe,, i hope this weekend was good to you bby!!
鈥旔煣<3
omg this chem boy is progressing fast SO BE CAREFUL. IT SOUNDS REALLY CUTE THO AND MAKES ME GO 馃ズ BECAUSE IT REMINDS ME A LOT OF HIGH SCHOOL but because of that, again, BE CAREFUL AJFA;JF,, OUT OF PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AKJFAL;FJ. he sounds very sweet tho omg and psh silly boy trying to blame you LMAO this is so cute and is giving me flashbacks to hs ;鈥;
i鈥檝e been alright! and it鈥檚 okay dw about it! i鈥檝e been pretty busy myself, either trying to not get mad at family and getting into a shit show lol so i stick with my sister since she came back home for a bit and we don't spend much time together anymore :p and kinda my brother now since our relationship is getting better,,,,,,,, or else genshin. the childe banner event is going away and i want. him. so. bad. please.聽
AND YES I LOVE HINATA HE- I鈥橫 SO PROUD OF MY SUNSHINE BOY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE WAS SO HAPPY聽 AND SUNSHINE ANDKDGKJDKFAJ i love him
AND THE BOBA IS SOOOO GOOD HEH. i had boba like everyday this week it was pretty bad..... and omg, okay i will! LOL probably will end up getting boba聽 tomorrow oops. plus side is now that i don't live on my own on campus i don't have to worry about spending money on either boba or groceries and now my brother buys it all :3c聽
i HOPE YOUG ET BOBA SOON. and ARLGKFHSJG pls i changed my pfp this morning when i got the chance because i was like,,,,, i don't wanna stare at my face lOL聽
i hope your weekend was good!!! <3聽
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koutawoo11 months ago
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HI hello. Ahhh I know the feeling. Yeah same for me quarantine is getting to my brain recently dadsd. Talk and nag all u want I'm here for it lol. One of the worst feelings is feeling tired of all you have to do and being behind etc etc AUGH I HATE IT TOO I GET U. Lol I wanna learn on my own and don't really know what to do. Ily pls take care of yourself :3 How is life other than the pain (I'm suffering while waiting for the mangas AUGH) _cognizant anon
frfr, and when i鈥檓 just on my phone chilling, and then i get 60+ notifications all at once bc my professors r posting assignments and creating their office hours on the calendar?? T.T Nnnnnnnnnnnoott tyeetttttt pleassseeee
I LITERALLY HAD A NIGHTMARE LAST NIGHT !! i dreamt that i had a chem exam on the very first day of the quarter (that i was unaware of) and i had completely bombed it bc i didn鈥檛 study at all ugh wtf ;__;聽 GIVE ME A BREAK ALREADY
u should buy the genki textbooks!! they teach at a rlly nice pace and everything鈥檚 p organized imo + it鈥檚 the resource that most universities utilize over here, i think聽
majority of my break was just me spending time w/ my sis HAHA she fell into genshin hell so i was just aiding her and what not. do uk when ur manga r gonna come? it鈥檚 been so long omg and dude ;w;; it鈥檚 january... which means, my hq!! nendoroids might ship out soon this month :DDD bokuaka nendoroid rerelease when
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