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#i just think about how much ella longs to be a mother
whatsk-poppinhomies · 1 month
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Pairing : Dad!Bangchan x F!Reader TW : Chans daughter is not readers child ; Chans ex wife and daughter are shit starters ; drama of course ; angsty ; honestly, poor Chan ; fluffy ending though ; slightly suggestive at the end as well ; Word Count : 6.5k Request : Anonny : Please write an angsty / fluffy fic about Dad!chan who, after years of not dating, finally decides to get back into dating & when he finally finds someone he doesn't tell reader he has a teenage daughter because he doesn't know how reader would feel about it but when reader finds out they're really upset and avoid him and his daughter reaches out to reader and convinces reader to talk to Chan and make up because she hates seeing her dad upset. A/N : This request is so cute and I'm so happy I get to write it. Of course, it will be super drama because I love when it happens, and with Chans recent bbl messages we know this man loves this kind of shit, so... This is for Chan and Chan stans and we love Chan!
“I got a call from your teacher today, Ella.” Chan said as his daughter walked through the front door. “They said your grades haven’t been the best lately, that you haven’t been focusing in class. Is something wrong? Do you have something going on?” He didn’t want to be the kind of father that always got on his child when their grades were below average, but he also didn’t want his daughter to flunk out. He wanted to see her be successful and happy in life, that’s all he ever wanted. 
“I’ve just been going through some stuff, dad.” Ella mumbled as she kicked her shoes into the corner near the front door and dropped her bags onto the floor. “Mom said she’s been trying to get in touch with you lately. I guess she saw that you’ve been posting about going out on your facebook.” She pulled out the chair across the table from Chan. “Why don’t I get to meet your new girlfriend?” 
Chan rolled his eyes, finally looking up from his phone to look at his daughter. “You’re changing the subject. What I do in my spare time isn’t important. Your grades are. So tell me, what kind of stuff have you been going through that’s been keeping you from being able to focus. Maybe I can help.” 
She huffed loudly, the attitude that he was warned would come along with a teenage daughter was in full force now. “It’s not even important anyway… Don’t you have a date to go on tonight? That’s all you ever talk about anymore. It’s like you don’t even care that mom left…” It was finally making sense to him, but it hurt that she felt that way. He had been kind enough to keep his ex wife’s dirty secrets just that, a secret, so that Ellas view of her mother wouldn’t be warped. He was trying to do the right thing, but it was becoming harder and harder. 
“I do care that your mother left… I was hurt by it for a long time, El. It’s been 8 years, and I think that it’s time that I’ve finally moved on because she isn’t coming back. Your mother has gotten remarried, divorced, and married again in those 8 years and I haven’t been with anyone until just a few months ago. I don’t think you’re being very fair right now.” He tried to explain, but he could tell, he could just see it in her face that she wasn’t ready to hear about it. “And, just so you know, I don’t have a date to go on tonight. I was planning on being here to help you with your homework and studying so that I don’t get another call like I had today.” 
///
“Had a late night in the studio, huh?” You said as you walked up behind Chan, your arms draping over his shoulders as he sat in front of his computer in his office. You could tell he was tired, he could barely sit up straight and his eyes wouldn’t stay open for longer than a few seconds. “It’s okay to take a break, bubs. It’s 3racha, not ChrisRacha.” 
He snickered at the little name, finally swiveling his chair around to face you and pulling you down onto his lap. “You sound like everyone else. I don’t like taking breaks, it gives me too much time to think about the time that I’m wasting.” He explained, his voice was groggy and not even laced, but completely filled with exhaustion. “I’ll be fine once I go over your place tonight, we can cuddle up and watch a movie.” He nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, his hot breath against your skin sending a wave of goosebumps all over. 
“They’re repainting all of the apartments, I can’t even go into my own house right now. I’ve been staying with my parents.” You reminded him, although you were sure you had texted him about it and told him about it in the days leading up to the renovation. “We can go over to your place. We’ve been dating for 4 months now and you haven’t even invited me over.” 
There was a reason for that, a reason that you didn’t know of, but he felt it was just better if you didn’t find out. The last thing he wanted was for you to run off because he had a daughter, not just any daughter though, a teenage daughter who was still hung up on the divorce of her parents. She wasn’t the easiest to get along with, and although Chan had tried to butter her up to the prospect of one day meeting you, she didn’t take too kindly to the fact that he was dating again. “My place is a mess…” He lied, trying to muffle his words in the fabric of your shirt so you wouldn’t pick up on it. “We can go to a hotel if you’d like.” 
“That seems sleezy…” You mumbled, and he felt awful, he truly did. It felt like he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He absolutely loves his daughter with every ounce of his heart, his entire being, he loved being her father. He loved you too though, you had been the light at the end of a very long, very dark tunnel. He didn’t want to have to choose between the two of you, it just didn’t seem fair. “I guess we’ll just wait for my apartment to be ready…” He could feel you trying to pull away, he could tell that you were upset, he didn’t want you to leave like that, so he tightened his arms around you, holding you close to him. 
“You’re not sleezy! I’m sorry I even recommended that, you’re better than that.” He quickly tried to get himself out of the hole that he had dug, it felt like he was clawing his way to the top, and everytime he got halfway out, he’d slip and he’d fall right back to the bottom. “I’ll clean my place, I just want it to be perfect for when you come over. Okay? You deserve the best.” 
The tension slowly left your body, he felt you soften up against him, and for a moment, it felt like he could breathe again. “Okay… Fine. I’ll wait… I just really miss sleeping next to you.” You whispered, and those words made his stomach feel warm and fuzzy. He missed sleeping next to you too. “I have to get back to work though… I’ll see you later. Try taking a break though, take a nap or something, that’s what the couch is for.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek before getting up, his arms reluctantly loosening around you until you were free to go. “Seriously, get some sleep.” 
///
“Where are you going?” Ella asked from the couch, watching Chan storm to the front door and yank his coat off the hook. “Did you and your girlfriend get into a little fight? Do you have to go kiss and make up now?” The mocking tone in her voice would usually only slightly irritate him, but he was already beyond irritated at the reason he had to leave in the first place. 
“No, it’s your damn mother.” He snapped, pulling his shoes on before grabbing his keys. “I don’t know how long she’ll hold me up, there’s food in the freezer, or you can grab my wallet out of my bag and order yourself something. Try to do some studying while I’m gone, please?” And without another word he was out the front door, slamming it behind him. 
What Chan didn’t know was that he had left his wallet at work on his studio desk, and you had gone into his studio before leaving to see if he was there but only found his wallet. He must have left the building without saying anything to you, and you wondered if maybe he was sick or something had happened back at his place. You were doing the right thing, at least that’s what you felt you were doing. You were just going to take his wallet home to him and check up on him. You didn’t mind that his house might be a little dirty, you completely understood that he was busy, you didn’t expect his house to be immaculate. 
You weren’t sure why you were so nervous to stand in front of his front door, but a chill ran through your body and you had to take a few breaths before even lifting your hand to knock. Once you did, you took a step back, listening to the locks being undone before the door opened. It wasn’t who you expected to see, it wasn’t Chan, it was a girl, she looked younger, at least 15 or 16. “Oh, I’m sorry. I must have read the address wrong.” You quickly apologized, bowing your head to the girl before turning away. 
“Who are you looking for?” The girl asked, and what you weren’t aware of was that she had seen Chans wallet in your hand, she knew that you had come to the right address, she was just playing a game that you didn’t know about. You quickly said his name, and she let out a soft hum. “He’s out right now. It’s date night for him and my mom.” You felt your stomach sink, deeper and deeper until it couldn’t go any further. “Is that his wallet? Thank you so much for bringing it, I’m sure he’ll be happy to know that you brought it back. Hopefully he’ll answer his phone so he can pick it up and pay the bill, you know?” 
You nodded slowly, the bile from your stomach rising into your throat. “Y-Yeah… Of course… H-Here you go.” You stammered, your hand shaking as you handed the wallet over to the girl. You knew she wasn’t lying, she looked so much like Chan it was uncanny. Why hadn’t he told you? What was he even doing with you? He had a wife, or at least a girlfriend or fiancee… He had a child… But he was going around with you? It was beginning to add up though… Why he always wanted to go over your house. Why he’d rather go to a hotel than to bring you to his own place. You felt absolutely sick. 
“Have a good night!” The girl chimed cheerfully as you made your way back to your car, the light from inside the house that had illuminated the front yard faded until you were covered in darkness. You were devastated, you were heartbroken… You had never felt more humiliated in your life and all you wanted to do was go crawl underneath a rock and hide there. 
///
The meeting with his ex wife the night before had stressed Chan out beyond belief. He couldn’t believe that after 8 years she wanted to fight for custody of Ella now. Her reasoning behind it would have been laughable if they hadn’t been so damn ridiculous. By the time he had gotten home though, Ella was already in bed and he was so tired from dealing with his ex that he had gone right to bed as well. By morning, Ella had already left for school, so he’d have to wait until he got off work and she got home from school to even talk to her about what her mother had said. 
Now, he was only looking forward to seeing you. You were the only person at this point who could calm him down and bring him some semblance of peace, at least for the short amount of time that he got to be with you. “Hey, lovely.” He called to you when he caught you walking down the hall. Usually you’d smile and wave, you’d even run over to him sometimes if the hall was empty. This time you just shook your head before lowering it and walking right by him. 
It was a shock to say the least, and his mind immediately jumped to the worst, although he couldn’t be 100% sure of what had happened that would cause you to be acting like this. Was it because of the hotel comment the day before? Was it because he wouldn’t let you come over to his house? It couldn’t be that though, he had talked to you about it. It had to be something more, but he couldn’t figure it out. You looked absolutely pissed, like you didn’t want anything to do with him. 
“Y/N!” He called out your name now, jogging down the hall to catch up with you, but you didn’t even look up at him, and you sure as hell didn’t slow down. In fact, it seemed like you sped up, like you were trying to get away from him. “Hey… What… What’s wrong? What happened? Are you okay?” He lowered his voice but quickened his steps to keep up with you, trying to duck down just enough to get a view of your face, but every time he got close enough you’d look away. 
“I don’t want to talk to you, I don’t want to see you. Whatever it was that you made me think we had, it’s over. I’d like it if you left me alone now.” You stated flatly, your arms tightening around the multitude of folders that you clutched to your chest. “I’m changing groups, I won’t be one of your staff anymore as well, so please, don’t bother me anymore.” 
Something had happened, and it wasn’t something that could easily be fixed like Chan thought. It was worse, way worse. You had basically fired yourself from being his group's staff because of whatever happened. “Hold on!” His fingers wrapped around your upper arm, stopping you from going any further. “So you’re just… Breaking up with me? You’re not even going to tell me why!?” His voice cracked as it rose in pitch, his chest rising and falling heavily as the panic fully set in. “I fucking love you, Y/N… You can’t just do this to me and not tell me why.” 
When you finally looked up, he could see your eyes were glistening, your bottom lashes bedazzled with twinkling tears that clung onto them. You were just as upset as he was. “Stop pretending, Christopher!” You croaked out, sniffling loudly once the words left your chapped lips. “I refuse to be the rebound chick that you think you can run to when your marriage is on the rocks. I won’t be strung along by you, not anymore.” You took a few deep, shaky breaths to compose yourself before you pulled your arm free of Chans hold. “Now, if you don’t mind… I have another group to meet. I have work to do. I do believe that you have some work to do as well.” You bowed your head to him before turning and walking away, leaving him more confused than he was before. 
His marriage… It had fallen apart years ago when he had come home to find his wife in bed with another man while his daughter was fast asleep in the room across the hall. It had been disgusting, heartbreaking, it would have been his downfall if not for his daughter and the moral, mental, and emotional support of the guys. He wasn’t sure why it was being brought up, he didn’t even know how you had found out, but that same feeling of devastation that he had felt 8 years ago was flooding him once again. 
The guys… They were the only ones who would be able to talk to you, they were the only ones who knew about the secret past that Chan was trying so hard to hide from you. Would they do something like that though? Would they hurt him like that? “Yo! What’s up?” Changbin said as he came up behind Chan, his arm draping over his shoulder. “You’re… crying? What happened?” The cheerful tone was immediately dropped, and even though Changbin was younger, he was in full protection mode. 
“Y/N… She… She broke up with me…. She knows about Sana…” He gasped out the words, each of them getting caught in his throat, it felt like he was choking. “Somebody told her… Someone… They had to have told her! Who!?” He was shouting now, his sadness turning to anger in a matter of seconds. The look of confusion of Changbins face was enough for Chan to know that he had no idea what Chan was talking about, and that in itself proved his innocence. That left 6 more guys to question. 
“Y-You know that none of us would do that to you… Why would we do that? You were happy!” Changbin quickly defended the others as well, seeing in Chans eyes that he was on the warpath and he wasn’t going to stop until he found out who had told you. “I… I do know she went to the studio last night after you left… She… She said something about your wallet but… Maybe she went to your house to drop it off and… and…-” 
“Ella…” Chan muttered out the name, a loud groan leaving him as his head fell back. “I have to go… Will you be okay? Can you run practice for me?” Now he was in a hurry, a hurry to get home, to talk to you… He had so many things he had to do, he didn’t even know where to begin. Changbin nodded his head, patting Chans shoulder before taking a step back. Truthfully, Chan didn’t know what the hell he was going to do… But he knew he had to do something. He wasn’t going to lose you… He couldn’t. 
///
“Sit. Now.” Chan said, not even giving his daughter time to fully come through the door before the words left his mouth. He had been sitting at the table, thinking over and over about how he’d go about bringing it up to her, but now that she was finally home, all of his thoughts had gone out the window and all he could feel was irritation. She rolled her eyes, dropping off her bag and kicking her shoes off like she did every day, heading in the direction of her bedroom. “Did you not hear me? I want to talk to you.” 
“About what?” She snapped, whipping around to face him. “About the lady that showed up on our front porch last night?” Chans eyes widened, he didn’t even have to drag it out of her, she wasn’t a liar… and for that, he was proud, he had at least taught her one good thing. “Did she dump you? Well good… You don’t deserve to be happy. Not after what you did to mom…” After… what he did…? He was stunned into silence, his head cocked to the side as he tried to think about what he could have possibly done to make him the bad guy in all of this. “She told me all about it, don’t try to act like you’re so innocent.” 
Those weren’t Ellas words, those were her mothers words and she was speaking them for her. “I tried so hard to protect your mother for some reason… So that you wouldn’t think badly of her… And this is what she does.” He mumbled, running his hand through his hair and sighing heavily. “Can you please sit? I really need to talk to you…” He stretched his legs under the table, pushing out the chair across from him and motioning to it with his head. He could see the reluctance, but she finally made her way over, dropping down into the chair, but not without an eye roll and a look of disgust. “I didn’t want to tell you the truth… I didn’t want you to see your mother as anything less than what she is… But I wasn’t the one who did anything. Your mother is the reason we’re divorced…” 
“You’re a liar… She said that you’d lie…” Ella mumbled, her arms crossing over her chest as she glared at her father. “Just like you lied to that lady. She didn’t even know I existed! You kept me a secret from her… Why? Are you embarrassed of me? Are you ashamed of me?” The sulky teenage attitude subsided, and he could see that she wasn’t just angry, she was upset. He never meant for it to be like this, he didn’t even think that something like this would happen. It’s not like he planned on keeping his daughter hidden forever… He just didn’t want to spring it all on you at the beginning of the relationship. 
“No! God, no… El… You are an amazing daughter, you’re smart and you’re funny… You’re the most wonderful thing I’ve ever created. I’m so proud of you…” He whispered, and he could see the tears beginning to form in her eyes. He should have told her these things a long time ago, maybe she wouldn’t be acting out, but it was too late, and now all he could do was try to fix things piece by piece. “I didn’t want to bring someone into your life unless I knew that it was serious… It’s one thing for me to be hurt… But I didn’t want you to potentially get close to her just for her to leave and hurt you too.” He swallowed thickly, taking a deep breath to prepare himself before continuing. “I divorced your mother… Because she cheated on me, Ella. Do you really think I would have gotten custody of you if it were the other way around? The man she married… That’s… That’s the guy… And they’re already divorced… And she’s already married again. She’s been married twice since the divorce, and I… I haven’t been with anyone until a couple months ago. Do you think that would be the case if I was the one who had screwed up?” He could see the gears turning in her mind as she thought about everything that he was saying, and he could see that it was all adding up. “Your mother wanted to meet up with me yesterday because she’s trying to get custody of you…” 
Ellas eyes widened and her head shook fast. “No… I don’t… I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to live with her, dad.” The words were rushed out, full fledged panic written across her features. “Don’t let her take me… I want to stay with you… I’m sorry… I’m sorry I told the lady that you were having date night with mom. I’m sorry that I ruined it… I’m sorry… Please don’t let her take me.” She was crying now, absolutely bawling, and it broke his heart to see his daughter so upset. 
He jumped out of his chair, running around to her side of the table and pulling her up into his arms. Right now, she wasn’t just a teenager with a bit of an attitude problem… She was his little girl, and he was going to protect her and he was going to keep her safe. He was going to fix everything, no matter what it took. “She’s not going to get you, she won’t win. You’re staying here with me… I promise.” 
///
“Have you gotten a hold of her?” Ella asked, dropping down onto the couch beside her father. It had been weeks since the last time he had spoken to you, but he had seen you in the halls at the building every single day. No matter how many times he tried to stop you and explain everything, you’d just keep walking like you didn’t know him at all. Ella could see that it was breaking him, and she knew that it was her fault. “I’m really sorry, dad…” She mumbled. 
Your picture was still his lockscreen, and every time a notification would pop up on his phone he would jump up, a single second of excitement and wishful thinking, only to be let down once he realized it was someone, anyone but you. “It’s okay… I’m gonna try to get some work done. Let me know when you get hungry, I’ll make us some dinner, yeah?” And she nodded slowly, waiting for Chan to get up and go into his little office before running to the front door and pulling on her shoes. If he wasn’t able to fix it, maybe she could. 
The walk to the building wasn’t too far, and she knew that, for the most part, whenever her father went into his office it was so he could cry in private. That usually lasted a couple hours, and she was sure that she wouldn’t need too much time. 
Everyone in the building knew her, they had heard so much about Chans daughter that she was looked at as an idol herself. They all welcomed her warmly, but she was on a mission. “Hi! Would you happen to know where an Y/L/N Y/N is? My dad sent me to make sure she got something.” She came up with it quickly, and no one seemed to question it either. They gave her the information just as fast and sent her on her way… It was far too easy… She’d have to talk to her dad about that. 
The ride up the elevator gave her enough time to think about what she would say, or at least a little bit of what she’d say. Truth be told, she was nervous. She wanted things to go well for her fathers sake, but she knew that the trouble she had caused and what she did could have irreversible damage. 
When the doors slid open, it was like fate had brought her here at this exact moment, because you were standing right outside the doors. “Oh… Uhm… I-I remember you…” You murmured, bowing your head to her before taking a step back. “I think you’re on the wrong floor though… Your father is a couple floors down.” 
Ella shook her head, stepping out of the elevator, trying to look like she wasn’t a nervous wreck standing in front of you. “I’m here to talk to you.” She said, her head held high just to exemplify the false feeling of confidence that she was trying to give off. “Are you busy?” 
“I’m very sorry if me being with your father created any problems. I’m not with him anymore though… And, with all due respect… I’m just trying to move on.” 
“That’s the problem though!” Ella blurted out as you moved past her and stepped into the elevator, turning around quickly on her heel to face you, her hand pressed against the elevator door to keep it from closing. “Him and my mother aren’t together… They haven’t been together for 8 years. I… I was upset because… I didn’t understand what happened… I didn’t know why my parents weren’t together and… My mom lied and… And I’m sorry. My dad really loves you… And he wanted me to meet you… And he’s been crying every night because I ruined your relationship because I lied just like my mom and I’m… I’m really sorry, ma’am…” 
She was once again crying, and you didn’t really know what to do, but it felt wrong to just stand there and watch her cry, so you hesitantly stepped out of the elevator and gave her the most awkward one armed hug. “It’s… It’s okay…” You murmured, and much to your surprise, she turned her body completely toward you and wrapped her arms around you. Whether there was a maternal bone in your body at all before this moment or not, you immediately felt the urge to comfort her, to make sure she was okay, to wipe her tears and tell her that everything would be fine. “Hey… Hey, let’s go to my office. We can get a drink and some tissues and then… I’ll take you home. Is that okay?” 
Ella nodded slowly, her face scrunched up and her bottom lip pushed out. She really did look like her father. “Will you talk to him?” She asked weakly, and as much as you hated him… Now that you knew the truth… It felt like the right thing to do, so you hummed in agreement to her question, leading her down the hall to your little office and pushing the door open for her. “Y-You know… You’re still his main picture on his phone. He’s waiting for you to text him or call him or something… He misses you so much.” 
You were sure that she didn’t mean to tell you so much, and you were very sure that Chan would be incredibly embarrassed if he found out that his daughter was telling you so much. “I’ll talk to him, I promise… Pinky promise.” You held out your hand, your pinky extended to her, and she quickly latched her finger around yours, a bittersweet smile tugging at her lips. 
“You are really pretty… He wasn’t lying… And you’re really nice too. I would be really mad at me if I were you…” She lowered her head, her entire body slouching forward as she sat in the chair across your desk. “Why aren’t you mad at me?” Her voice was below a whisper, her question genuine, and you didn’t really know how to answer it. 
“Well…” You began, your fingers drumming against your lap as you leaned back in your chair. “I don’t blame you for what you did… You’re a child and… And your parents divorced. I’m sure that any child would be upset if they found out either of their parents was dating someone else, especially if the kid doesn’t understand why their parents divorced in the first place. You were protected from the truth… But it made you do something that you regret. It’s still not your fault though, it’s no one's fault.” You reached across your desk, your hand faced up for her, and she slowly placed her hand in yours, the smile from earlier returning to her face, but this time it was just a little bigger and it reached her eyes. “Let’s go see your dad, yeah?” 
///
Chan had at some point cried himself to sleep while sitting in front of his computer, but the sound of a soft knock on the door had him jolting awake. “Dad?” Ellas voice came between the small crack in the door as she peeked inside, and he quickly wiped the sleep from his eyes as he got up from his chair, almost bringing his entire laptop with him since he forgot to take the headphones off. “I ordered dinner for us… It’s here.” She said between little giggles at the way he stumbled. It was nice to hear her laugh, he hadn’t heard it in a bit, not from anyone in the house. He wondered what had changed. 
“You didn’t have to do that, I would have cooked for us…” He said somberly, but he knew that she was doing it as a favor for him. He was a wreck, it was visibly noticeable that he hadn’t had more than a few hours of sleep in the past two weeks, he had bags under his eyes and his hair was a mess. He was a shell of the man that he once was when he had you, but he knew he had to get better, he wasn’t sure how he would do that, but it wasn’t fair to Ella to constantly be like this, it would only make her feel more guilty. “I’ll be right out… Thank you.” He said when she hovered in the doorway, and he watched her walk away. There was a bounce in her step, she hadn’t been this peppy in a while. He was genuinely curious and now he was rushing out of the little studio room so that he’d be able to sit down and talk to her, maybe he could find out what was going on. 
“I hope you don’t mind, I brought a friend over.” She said from the kitchen. He was adamant that he had never heard her bring up a friend, especially not one that would come over and visit. Was it a boy? She never mentioned liking anyone at school… Was she too scared to talk to him about those kinds of things? He made a mental note to sit down and talk to her about it one day this week. “Are you coming?” She called out and he hummed in agreement, trudging out of the little room with his head hung just a little. 
This wasn’t the first impression that he wanted one of his daughter's friends to have of him as her father. He wanted to look more respectable for the sake of Ellas reputation. It seemed like he didn’t really have a choice though, she was rushing him to come out, and he didn’t want to keep her and whoever she had over waiting. “I apologize, I wasn’t really told that you’d be coming over.” Chan began as he walked down the hall, and he completely froze when he saw just who his daughter had brought over. 
“I don’t think anyone really knew I was coming over.” You said lightly, the warmest smile spreading across your face as you looked at him. He couldn’t say anything, he couldn’t find words, all he could manage to do was open his mouth and croak out sounds as salty tears pricked his eyes. “Is it… okay… that I’m here?” You asked when the silence lasted longer than you thought it would, and he nodded his head fervently, wiping his eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie. 
“It’s… It’s more than okay… I just… I don’t know why… I don’t mind it though.” He rambled, looking between you and Ella who was currently setting the table for three people instead of the usual two. “You’re… staying for dinner?” He questioned, and you gave him that adorable, heart stopping smile that had stopped him in the halls of the building all of those months ago, the smile that had pushed him over the edge and made him fall for you in the beginning. 
“Yes she is.” Ella spoke up, clapping her hands together to get both of your attention. “Do you want me to eat in my room… So the two of you can talk? I’m sure you have a lot to talk about… I can leave you alone if you’d like.” But you shook your head, walking over to the table and playfully ruffling her hair before opening the takeout bag and pulling out the contents. 
“I’d like it a whole lot if you stayed and ate with us… But if you want to eat in your room… If your dad says it’s okay… Then you can.” You sounded so… sweet, the way a mother would talk to her own daughter, and the craziest part was that Ella smiled at you before taking a seat at the table, she actually listened to you… There was no attitude that came alone with it. “Are you just going to stand there and look at the food, or are you going to join us in eating it?” You asked, bringing Chan out of his own thoughts and back into the room. 
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m coming…” Chan whispered, walking into the dining room and taking his usual seat, but the aura at the table was a lot different now. It’s like the whole room had gotten 10 times brighter, and no matter which way he looked he was met with a warm smile. He had so many questions, but he knew that he had all the time in the world to ask them, and regardless of the answer… He knew that things would be better now, all of the pieces were falling back into place, and the picture was more beautiful than he had ever imagined it to be. 
~6 Months Later~
“You’re gonna absolutely crush this test, I know you will.” You stood at the stove, preparing breakfast as Ella sat at the table, her face buried in her text book to get as much last minute studying in before she had to go to school. “No matter what, I want you to remember that your dad and I are so proud of you and how hard you work. Okay? We love you.” Ella hummed softly, not even looking up from her book, but you could see that she was smiling, and that was enough of a response for you to know that she had heard you, that she was listening. You carefully placed her plate down beside her, lightly tapping the table to get her attention. “Please eat. Okay?” 
Chan ran out of the bedroom, his eyes barely even opened, his shirt wrinkled and twisted and his hair sticking up in all different directions. “Did she leave yet?!” He asked rather loudly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and blinking a few times before focusing in on his daughter who was looking up at him, her shoulders shaking with silent laughter. “Don’t laugh, it’s not funny. I wanted to give you a hug before you left.” He pouted, and she quickly got up out of her chair, rushing over to Chan and wrapping her arms around him. “You’ll do great. I-” 
“No more speeches! You guys are going to make me cry!” Ella dramatically whined, pulling away from Chan and running back to the table to pack her things into her bag and then shoveling as much food into her mouth as she could before going to the front door. “Love you! I’ll see you later!” She mumbled with her mouth full of food, and before the two of you could say it back she was out the door. 
Once the door was shut, Chan walked over to you, his arms wrapping around your from behind as he rested his chin against your shoulder. “Hey…” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your cheek that was dampened by tears that you hadn’t even realized had begun to fall. “What’s wrong, lovey?” He cooed, gently turning you around to face him, his head cocked to the side. 
“I don’t know… I just… I’ve only been here for six months and… We’ve gotten so close and… She’ll be going off to college soon if that’s what she wants to do… But… I’m gonna miss her and the house is gonna be so empty and…” You pouted up at Chan who couldn’t help but find it adorable the way you were right now. It was the most heartwarming thing, to know that you loved his daughter so much already that you were crying at the thought of her leaving. 
“Well… We have the house to ourselves for a couple of hours… We could watch a movie or something to take your mind off of being sad… Or… We could go have some fun… Surprise Ella with a brother or a sister when she comes home from college…” Your eyes widened at the suggestion, but your feet were already moving in the direction of the bedroom, that all too familiar tingly feeling building in your stomach. “We can watch a movie when we’re done… If you’re not too tired.” 
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prettyforwoso · 2 months
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Help Us Understand.
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Barca x teen reader
Alexia x teen reader
Lionesses x teen reader
word count: 3500
Summary: y/n, a talented 16-year-old footballer, nicknamed "la princesa," battles the harsh realities of adolescence. Burdened by self-harm scars and body image insecurities, she attempts to hide her struggles from the team. The team uncovers her deepening eating disorder, prompting a collective effort to guide her through recovery.
tw: mention of eating disorders and self harm
Being a teenager in this world is hard. Not only are you working with shitty hormones and breakouts on your face, you also have to put up with the nightmare of other teenagers. Most of them are fine, in fact, what seems to be the worst of it, are the people who are no longer teenagers, and think that’s a valid reason to attack those who are younger and more vulnerable than them. Like you.
You are a lioness, 16, debuting at 15, now playing for Barcelona, a along side your England teammates, Lucy and Keira. You are known as “la princesa.” The nickname came around after your first game for Barca, in which, you scored a Hatrick and pulled a neat assist. the fans linking your talent to Alexia, saying how much you play like her. Quick, rough, strong. You have always been that way.
This nickname sparked a close connection between you and Alexia. She took you under her wing the second you got off the plane in Barcelona. She didn’t like the idea of you living alone in a new country, despite your ability to speak perfect Spanish. So, you lived with her “only for the first few weeks” which has turned into months. Alexia acts like she is trying to help you find an apartment, but isn’t, like secretly loves having you around, seeing so much of her younger self in you. She fusses over you, cares for you, feeds you, scolds you, drives you to school, gets emails from your school. She has stepped into your life and has supported you in every way a mother would.
You have a bad history with self-harm. It was Leah Williamson who noticed it first, well maybe just the first person to speak to you about it, but you don’t know that. You were rooming with her for your first England camp. Nervous about the girls seeing your scars, you were always wearing a long sleeve under your training kit, which at times got hard as it was summer.
A few girls would joke to you, “how are you not boiling?” was the consistent one that just made you want to rip the skin off whoever said it. It was some of the older girls who brought it up with each other at a post-match dinner that you managed to get out of. It was Lucy, Leah, Mary, Beth and Lotte who exchanged their concern, how they never seen your arms, how you were always somehow too busy for ice baths, how you shivered when someone would grab your wrists. They all kept a close eye on you, but decided not to come to any conclusions, as in reality, you were known to be the sunshine and smiles of the squad.
But you weren’t, and deep down, they knew that too.
It all came crashing down one afternoon, when Leah found a bloody rag in the bathroom bin, she investigated further and found your blades in the back of your phone case that you had left on your bed.
She called Beth to your room, who then called lucy, they gathered together in your room, talking about the next steps. The three of them sat in an almost silence, saddened by the conformed truth. They made their plan, not wanting to waste any time.
They found you in the games room, laughing with Ella as you and a group of girls played table tennis.
“y/n, sorry I just need to grab you real quick” Leah said, breaking her observant silence. You were pulled into a room, it all happened so fast. Lucy placing you on her lap, wrapping her arms around you and Beth pulling your phone out of her back pocket. Leah speaking, you didn’t hear any of it, your focus being on Beths hands, taking off your phone case and picking up the tiny metal blades. You just cried and cried as they talked to you, you didn’t say a word, not denying anything. You cried into lucy’s arms as they tried to understand you and your reasoning being the scars. It took some gentle tugging and tears of resistance for your top to be pulled over your head, leaving you in just your bra and pants in Lucys lap as Leah ran a gentle finger across the healed and fresh marks along your arms. Beth moved closer to you, taking your face in her hands, clearly holding back tears of her own.
No one was supposed to know. But when they did, it killed you.
The bad thing about talent is the expectation of performance, and when you underperform, you would be attacked online. The hatred and negativity really got you, and ruined a lot of your confidence and the girls knew that. They knew the comments you would get, about your play, your personality, your body.
The comments about your body were some of the worst, and they didn’t get better when you started at Barca, in fact, they got worse. It was almost like it was all you saw. You would make a post about a game and hardly anyone would speak about how well you played or how many goals you scored. All you would see was the comments about how your body has changed, how you look in the kit, your legs, hips, arms, boobs. It got so bad that you stopped posting all together and turned off all your comments. Soon however, they comments came to the Barcelona Instagram page, and the pages of your teammates. You worked harder that ever. Working out was no longer about training your body to perform and be strong, it became about looking different and making changes to your body physically.
You were running lengths each morning and evening as well as staying back at training. You weren’t fat, or thin, nothing abnormal for a teenager with a changing body. You had bigger boobs than you did 3 months ago, wider hips, thicker thighs, yknow, everything normal, but the fans didn’t think so, and that’s what got the best of you.
Alexia noticed your increase in running and working out but at first brushed it off as you wanting to prove yourself to a new team. But it soon became hard to ignore when you were finding excuses to not eat, the snacks she would buy you because she knew you loved them, sat in the kitchen untouched. She tried to pretend she couldn’t hear you coughing up each meal in the bathroom, more for her own comfort.
It became too much to ignore when others noticed.
“Why are you running so much little one?” Mapi asked you, completely innocently after training one day in the change room.  At first you pretended not to hear, until you realised the whole team was awaiting an answer.
“Do you think I’m just naturally the fastest on the team?” you joke back, getting a laugh from her and a few others. Alexia remains stone face, looking as though she could see right through you.
A few of the girls watched you through squinted eyes as you pull your bag over your shoulder, noticing your spine that wasn’t visible last week. They exchange looks amongst themselves as you and Alexia walk towards her car.
“I got a call from your school yesterday” Alexia says, hiding behind her sunglasses as she pulls out of the car park.
“Why” you ask dry as you pull your phone out of your hoodie pocket. Alexias’s silence was inevitable. You turn your head towards her, awaiting a response. She keeps her eyes on the road, rolling her tongue along her top teeth, looking out at the cars ahead in deep thought.
“Why are you hiding from me bebita?” she breaks her silence, with an almost whisper.
“What are you talking about” you snap back in her direction
“You tell me Pequeña, Why do you think your school called, Se honesta conmigo” her eyes didn’t leave the road.
“No sé” you reply, swallowing the truth that lingers on the tip of your tongue, threatening to reveal itself.
“What is going on with you” Sabes que no deberías actuar de esta manera.” She takes a breath, remaining hidden being her bold sunglasses, refusing to look you in the eye, scared of becoming too vulnerable.
The silence was deafening. Pulling up in the driveway, you reach for the car door, your attempt at defusing the situation quickly rejected as Alexia locks the doors, trapping you in a conversation. You refuse to turn from the window, Alexia now being the one begging for eye contact.
“Bebita, look at me” she whispers. Her failed attempt of a resolution resulting in her hand reaching for your long curls, gently moving your head around to see your face. Her breath hitches as she looks at the tears swelling in your eyes, immediately bringing her thumb to wipe them off your soft skin.
“I hate when you yell at me” you begin, chocking on almost every syllable. “Estoy tratando de ser valiente”
“oh cariño ven” she says desperately as she pulls you effortlessly over the centre console and into her lap, wrapping her arms around you. Your tears just get heavier, as you hide your face into her neck, the idea of getting out of the car, now long forgotten.
“Bebita, your school is worried, you are the top student, why are you not doing work? Hay algo que te distraiga? She gently nudges you in her arms as she askes. “I am worried for you, talk to me”.
You just couldn’t bring yourself too. The truth is, you were too distracted for school, for homework, for study. There was so much on your mind right now. The last thing you were worried about was classes that you already knew all the content for. You were hungry, not eating at all, desperate for control over your changing body.
The next dreaded team bonding night came all too soon. Your tried to convince Alexia you were too busy with school but she wasn’t having a bar of it, almost having to drag you out the door and into the car. Nothing you wanted to do more in that moment than curl up in bed with a teddy and your warm blanket Alexia got you for my room in her house. But it was unavoidable. Alexia was correct in the way of you having to be at the dinner, in her perspective it was to show up and be social, for you personally it was about proving the concerned rumours between the girls that you weren’t eating wrong. However, that didn’t exactly go to plan.
Alexia parks in the driveway of Mapi and Ingrid’s home and you follow her inside. You greet all your teammates, receiving a kiss on the cheek and head pat from most of them and they smile down at you.
Since the conversation in Alexia’s car a few weeks ago, she hasn’t let you out of her sight, you didn’t even get into the not eating stuff, but still has watched your every mouthful over the past few weeks. You still had your tricks, not eating when she wasn’t around, running now three times a day on top of training, and all else. You were deteriorating. Dark bags under your eyes and hallowed cheeks.
“Y/n come get some pizza before you sit” Frido pulls you to the kitchen away from the crowd that was the typical team bonding, this felt like a test.
“Oh no, its okay” you scan your surroundings before following up your statement. “Alexia fed me before we came” you smile, attempting to be casual.
“oh, that’s weird, we always have dinner at team bonding” she raised an eyebrow, questioning what felt like your whole existence. She grabs a slice for herself and tries to offer you some anyways, failing as you kindly decline, insisting you will have some later.
People were scattered everywhere around the home, some sitting around the table playing card games, others vacating outside with a drink. You scan the house looking for place to escape to. All you wanted was to leave the overstimulation that was this monthly event.
You head towards the empty bathroom, the room you spend probably the most time in at other people’s houses. You begin to almost run towards it as you hear your name being called. It was too late; Lucy was stood outside yelling your name through the door of the garden.
“Y/n, come talk to us we miss you” she giggles as she enters the room to get you. You begin the walk of shame towards her. Overthinking what is coming next. Stepping out the door onto the porch your gently grabbed by the back of the neck and brought to a group of women standing around. Their faces light up as they see you. The group consists of Mapi, Lucy, Alexia Frido, Jenni and Ona, all sharing a bottle of wine.
“Y/n, you want a drink?” Ona asks, you aren’t sure if she’s joking or not.
“No Ona, she is a child” Jenni interferes and takes the drink Ona is pouring, handing it to Lucy, who puts it down with ease. You crack a smile at the interaction. They think you are so innocent…
“You’re not old enough for a drink yet Bebita, especially on an empty stomach” Alexia jokes with a smile.
“empty stomach?” Frido butts in, tilting her head in confusion at the contradicting information.
fuck.
You let out a load cough to clear your voice before quickly excusing yourself from the conversation. “I need to pee” you announce before hurrying inside, finding Ingrid at the table, playing cards with a few others.
The group, now abandoned by you stand in a deafening silence.
“She’s not eating is she?” Frido breaks, looking at Alexia with wide eyes.
“Shes not doing good, no” Their captain reply’s looking down at the glass in her hand.
“So we were right” Mapi says through squinted eyes as she tightened her grip on the stem of her wine glass.
Most of the team has been talking for a few weeks now. Lucy briefly filled them in about your history with Self harm and how you were managing it now. But the not showing up to meal times and doing overtime in the gym was something she couldn’t explain. However, they soon linked it to the bullying from people online about your body. It became to much for them all when Alexia broke down in front of them, claiming her worry for you. It was clear there was a bigger picture to what you were letting them see, seeing as their usually stone faced, strong captain had tears in her eyes over you.
Your rapid weight loss didn’t go unnoticed, even coaching staff beginning to threaten benching you if you didn’t gain some weight, claiming you were too weak to continue at full trainings and games. You always just told them you were sick, claiming it as an excuse for the weight loss and loss of appetite.
At first, everyone, including team members believed you, until they noticed you weren’t getting better, like you would if you were really sick with a catchable illness.
“So what are we going to do? because we cant loose her, shes our best” Lucy asks, getting more frantic as the sentence rolls out her mouth.
“I’ve tried talking to her, she just lies, tells me shes fine, ella me ignorará” Alexia says, finally looking up from her half full glass, meeting the eyes of her teammates.
“I know she needs me, but she won’t talk to me, she is sneaking into my bed each night for comfort, I wrap my arms around her when she falls alseep, ella tiene miedo de estar sola, shes been clinging to us, as if she is desprate for help, but doesn’t know how to ask. She won’t leave my side, unless there is food involved. luego ella desaparece” Alexia blurted out, speaking slow and clear, explaining herself.
“Maybe if we all try” Ona breaks her personal silence, earning a raised brow from a few listeners, the nodding heads soon followed.
“Bebita, can I come in” You hear Alexias voice beam through the small gap in the doorframe.
“A few of us are here too see you” you tilt your head in confusion at her followup statement, why are people here to see you, so late in the evening. You thought everyone would have returned home after team bonding, as did you and Alexia, why was there people outside your bedroom door?
You sit up in your bed, still tucked under the covers in your hoodie (that may of may not be Alexias) and shorts, clinging to your Stitch teddy. You close your laptop playing your movie and move it down the bed, finally giving Alexia a response.
“ehh, yeah come in” you say, unsure on what you are agreeing too.
You remain put under the safety of your covers, as if they would protect you from danger as the group of women enter your once personal space, finding refusge in spots around your room, most of them making themselves at home on your bed, espechailly Alexia, who comes up close to you and wraps and arm around your shoulders. Lucy, Ingrid, Mapi, Frido and Ona looked at you, as if they were waiting for you to break the artifical silence.
“Querida estamos aquí para hablar contigo” Ingrid is the first to speak up, beofre Mapi adds to her girlfrinds statement.
“I think you know what about” she fidgests with her rings. “we are just trying to understand”
“so help us do that, please sweetheart” Frido interupts.
You shake your head and close your eyes, as if you could open them and it would all go away. “I don’t know what your talking about”
“I have lectured you enough about your lying bebita” Alexia says in a stern voice.
The silence isn’t going away. You were in full control of it, and you knew that. You knew that they were waiting for you to talk, no one was going to make it easy for you.
”Desearía poder hacer que todo desaparezca” you shut your eyes once again as the tears start to spill out the creases. “I just want to be able to control what is changing”
The girls don’t speak, they are waiting for more, and they won’t break untill they are statified.
“I don’t know how to ask for help, or how to be okay” The tears get heavier as you push out the words, Alexia runs her free hand along your face, nudging you to keep going. You put in your best efforts to regain your breathing as your lip quivers in Alexia’s hand. Still no one was talking.
“I never meant for it to get this bad, I just wanted to get some control, I feel like there is so much online about me, rumors, hate, negitivity, all things I cant just reach out and get my hands on, to be able to toy with it and mold it to the way I want it. There is so little I can control, but my body, I can. No queria llegar tan lejos. Im so scared of losing myself, I want to hold onto the me that I am forever but I know I can’t, but I wanted to try, and that is why I yearn for whatever control I can get. So many ideas are put into my head about what my body should look like, how tall I should be, how much I should weigh, how tan I should be, how I should hold myself. I realised I am so calm and content when I play football, and that is because I am perfect at it, no one finds flaws in the way I play, but I second I step off the pitch I loose that warm feeling, because I have flaws again. When football is out of the picture, I am covered in them. I just wanted living to feel the same as playing, perfect and flawless.
The amont of tears in the room should safe a deadly drought.
“nuestra niña hermosa, estamos aquí” Ingrid climbs onto the bed coming closer to you, followed by the remaining womens in the room, all finding a spot, as close to you as they could get. So many arms are wrapped around you, so many hands holding your face, wiping your cold tears away.
“Let us help you darling” Lucy and Ona say in an unmost unison.
You slowly allow yourself to nod.
The following weeks were slow and painful, but what isn’t in recovery? The girls put it upon themselves to keep you in check, taking turns taking you out on small adventures, like going for walks or getting icecream to get you out of the house as you were ruled out of training and playing for a few weeks by your phycologist, that Alexia and Lucy insisted that you saw, they drove you to each appointment and picked you up, no questions asked. Meal time in the house became a big thing, Alexia discarding the idea of sitting around the table and eating, instead opting for sitting wherever, weather that was outside, or in, watching a movie, or just chatting. This change of environment around meals made eating less of a chore, as you got better, teammates would come over for dinner and it became more a social event, a more relaxing endeavor. You slowly made your way back to training as you got your fitness back, earning pats on the back from your team who you had made, very proud.
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heyhihellosworld · 9 months
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𝐀𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮
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Trent Alexander-Arnold x reader
Word count: 6.2k
Summary: Trent would do everything for his daughter even if it's out of his comfort-zone but maybe something, or someone can make it more bearable.
Warnings: Single parent, talk about non-present parents, horses, angst, smut, fluff, dad!trent, young pregnancy (19/20)
Notes: I don't know but this idea just came to me randomly when I was in the stables and I just find it funny to see these out of place parents, especially dads so yeah. Random but fun to write
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Being a single parent wasn't always easy. Trent found it hard to be as present as possible, to spend as much time with his daughter as he wanted and still succeed in his football career. It took a lot of time, effort and help but he managed well, being the best dad possible and still develop in his football. It took a toll on him but he wouldn't trade it for the world.
Since he had been a little kid football had been his life, his goal and the only thing that mattered. For so long it was all that consumed his life, until Ella came along. It was never the plan, never his intention after the one-night stand he'd had but it happened and after a rocky year he had full custody of his baby.
After that his priorities changed because he was no longer alone, he couldn't be selfish anymore, he couldn't think about himself because he had a little girl at home. A little girl relying on him for food, comfort and love and suddenly, she was what mattered the most.
Less to say Trent didn't have a lot of free-time, already juggling more than the time could wrap up but he didn't really miss anything, he felt complete. The only thing he sometimes missed was dating. Going out was nowadays almost impossible, even though his brothers and parents tried to help out and babysit as much as they could he didn't feel fine with leaving her in their responsibility too long knowing they already helped out more than they should. Trent hadn't dated someone in what felt like years nor had he gotten any action regurarly. He didn't mind it, but he could miss it some days. Not only the sex but the social life outside of his work. That's why it felt like a blessing when Ella got older and he had to engage in some of her free-time activities. It wasn't like before of course, this was mothers and fathers with their kids not drunk idiots in a club in some VIP-room. But it was still some kind of social life, some people he could talk to and sometimes hang out with outside of the footballpitch.
For him it was obvious she would play football. It was what he'd anticiapated for a long time but the little girl said no. She didn't wanna play football, she wanted to take horseback-lessons, and as the nice father he was he didn't pressure her into anything but said ok, she would get to take her horse-riding lessons if that was what made her happy.
The four-year old was over-joyed, not Trent. He was as far away from his comfort zone he could imagine when he stepped onto the yard with his estatic daughter. It was muddy and bloody cold but he didn't say anything, just smiled at Ella who blabbered away.
Anything for her
It was all he repeated in his head to get himself to not jump into the car again.
He could hear his teammates laughing in his head as he stood in the small house which apparently was called the club-house. When he had told them about his daughters wish he had got his head nagged in with teasing, but hey, anything for her.
He got informed of how it worked, where the list was, where the different buildings were located, how he handled the horse, that he'd have to fix it up before riding.
He nodded along pretending he understood just fine before walking after Ella as she hurried into the stable. The smell was the first thing that hit him, then the horses. What the fuck was he doing here, why hadn't he asked somebody who knew something about this to take her? Well probably because she had been so excited for him to come along.
"Look, look!" Ella prompted, grinning from ear to ear as she pointed to one of the horses "Which one am I having? Which one daddy?"
Trent shook his head "Uh, what was his name? Mons?" "Monty!"
Trent hummed, nodding as they walked along the line of horses, "Here it is" he told her and she squealed with excitement at the tiny, fat little horse that stood in the box, glaring at them from inside.
Trent stood a few meters away as one of the people who helped out in the stables showed Elle how to tack up. He could feel the stares as he tried to look at what they were doing, trying to memorize but nah, it was too much stuff. Ella almost bounced on the spot as everything was ready, Trent yet to touch the horse that was still glaring at them.
-
Trent sat on the cold tree stand as he watched his daughter wiggle around on the horse. If it wasn't for the biggest smile on her face he would've tried to talk her into something else but he couldn't, and it didn't matter how bitter he felt. He would have to learn and show up, put on his well practiced fake-smile, for her.
-
"Are you really Trent Alexander-Arnold?"
The sound of his name made him look up, taken aback by the mention. He hadn't even thought about being spotted or recognised here which he of course should have.
"Eh, I am" he choke before he even located the woman who spoke but when he did he felt like his choked reply was just right. Before him stood a beautiful woman, she didn't look like a mom, for sure not. She looked about his age, maybe a year or so younger than him.
She was absolutely stunning, her beutiful face held a warm and almost teasing expression. Eyes glimmering, like she was mocking him for his whereabouts.
"Wow" she hummed, sitting down next to him so naturally it almost made him envy her confidence. "So what in the world brings the famous footballer to the stables?" She asked, seemingly unbothered but the smirk she tried to hide leaked through, making him pull a grimace at her.
"Well, my daughter wanted to take horseback-lessons... so I took her to do it, silently hoping she wouldn't like it but now I guess this is my new place to be" he muttered and she chuckled softly "That's sweet of you"
Trent shrugged his shoulders, looking over at her as she sat so casually but still looked so elegant and beautiful. "What about you?" "Well I also happen to have a daughter who loves this stinky hole" she hummed, peeking his interest even more "Really?" he questioned, his eyes full of interest as she hummed "yeah, why?"
"No no I just... you look young to be a mother" he revealed, pulling a smile from her "thank you, I guess. But I was young when I got her" she admitted, making Trent nod along "How old are you?"
"23" she answered shortly making him hum "And what's your name?"
She chuckled, giving him a loopsided smile as she raised one eyebrow "Why are you so interested?"
Trent shrugged "I just am, you're not gonna tell me your name?"
"Y/n, it's y/n" she answered politely, a silence settling over the two as they watched their children try to lead the horse in the right direction.
--
It had been a stressful afternoon for you, hurrying home after work to make it in time to Amelies riding-lesson. But you'd made it, not quite on time but good enough.
Amelies riding lessons was nothing you'd been too big of a fan of, not only because you knew nothing about horses but also because it was darn expensive. But of course you couldn't say no to your precious daughter when she so sweetly asked you, so now you found yourself on this tree bench every week, looking as your daughter held the biggest smile on her face, and it felt worth it.
"I don't mean to be forward" you voiced quietly after a few moments, "It's fine" he hummed, turning his attention to you, bracing himself for what he knew was coming.
He was even more beautiful face to face, so close up, than on the tv-screen and you still had a hard time realizing it was actually the football player sitting next to you on the stable stand.
You had of course read gossip sites and rumors about him and his daughter, some saying he was indeed secretly married and other saying it was a failed one-night stand leading him to be a single parent. You didn't know what it was but you were intrigued.
"Are you married?"
Your question didn't surprise him, his eyes fleeting back from watching the group to you again. "Well-no"
"No?"
He shook his head, curls flying all over the place, your face told him you wanted to know more and he gave in, he knew darn well about all the rumours flying around about him and his daughter, and especially about the mother. "I am not married. Me and Ella's mother is not in any committed relationship. In fact it was a one night stand, ending up in her calling me and telling me she was pregnant and after a long hard time she pulled out, and I am now a single parent"
You hummed "is her mother in the picture at all?"
"Rarely, whenever it suits her" he shrugged, not really understanding why he told you all this. "What about you?" You chuckled bitterly "Nah, I was in a relationship when I got pregnant, but like I said I was young, barely 19 and our relationship was as serious as they are at that age so when things got real he bailed"
"So, do you have any contact?"
"No, I haven't really heard from him since I told him I was pregnant, I forced him to meet her once" you told him bitterly, the air tensing but you didn't mind and neither did he. It was nothing secretive and something you both had moved on from so talking about it felt like a natural part of an introduction because it was a big part of who you were, big part of your families.
When the short lesson was over Ella was bouncing as she ran up to Trent. You stood next to him, waiting for Amelie whilst continuing to small-talk. You couldn't help but smile as he kneeled down to scoop her up in his arms with the brightest smile. "Did you enjoy it princess?"
"I love it! Thank you daddy" he chuckled as he let her down again "Of course sweetie, are you all done now so we can go home and cook?"
You watched as the little girl nodded before looking away, Trent saw it aswell "It's okay, we can stay a little longer" he smiled at her shy look making her face lit up again "I just wanna say bye to my friends" she replied, kissing his cheek before running up the small bump into the stables again.
You felt like pouting at the sweet interaction but stopped from it seeing they were strangers and it would probably put him off. "She is really adorable" you smiled as he stood up again, smiling small.
"Thank you"
"Have you been here for a long time?"
"Here?"
"Have your daughter been riding for a long time?" he corrected making you hum "Well nah not that long, a couple of months" you answered. More than that wasn't said and it felt like a small relief when both of your daughters came running down from the stable giggling, breaking the sudden awkvard tension. You smiled at your daughter, her hapiness making you happy.
"Mommy, did you see?!" she squeeled as she raised her arms as a sign for you to lift her up which you did with a grin. "I did see, you were really good today" you smiled, loving her happy face as she bubbled with hapiness, all giddy.
You put her down when she started to wriggle, packing down all the things in your stable-bag. "Mom"
"Yeah" you hummed "Do you think I can play with Ella some day?"
You looked up, smiling softly as you paused "I'm sure we could fix something some time" you promised making her smile again, breaking away from the small shy energy. You could see that she was tired, even though she was blabbering and bouncing the tiredness started to droop onto her.
When she yawned you chucled, picking her up which she gladly accepted, snuggling into your shoulder.
You waved goodbye at Trent who smiled your way before stropping Amelie in the car to drive home.
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Since that first time in the stables Trent and Ella went every week, every week coming to seek you out, ask you about your week and how you'd been since last time.
What in the beginning was a dreadful day for Trent slowly started to become an enjoyful one. You liked the stables just fine but it didn't get worse by seeing Trent.
Whenever he wasn't there it was a huge disapointment, something you were all to aware of.
He had became a good friend, your daughters spending time outside of the stables as well which prompted you to meet more than once a week.
The attraction was there, always but of course you never went with it since the kids were around and dating with a kid or even more so sleeping around whilst having a kid was not something you found appropriate or fair for her at the moment so you didn't do anything, didn't say anything and if he felt the same way he didn't say it.
You learnt more and more for every time you met and got more and more smitten. You understood why everybody was fawning over him so bad. You'd always liked him on the pitch, enjoyed watching him play but this was something completely different than that.
It was a sunday you realized how smitten you actually was with the guy. He had suggested to meet up for the kids to play so you could watch football together. It was United against City so the expectations where high as you sat in your sofa together. The girls in Amelies room playing.
He had been such a softie, resting his hand on your thigh as you sat closer than appropriate, conversing and laughing about the game. He told you stories about himself, about Ella and it was all so soft.
His eyes had been warm and he had been so sweet, cooking all of you lunch and helping you fix the new coffee table you hadn't put together yet. It had felt so domestic and it had made you realize how much you actuallly liked the guy.
But you hadn't spoken a word about it. It was too complicated to get involved with anyone. No man had gotten introduced to Amelie except from her dad but other than that you had stayed far away from that part of you. Only ever being with someone when Amelie wasn't home.
It was a delicate matter with kids and you didn't want to risk anything, plus, you had no idea if Trent even liked you in the slightest so you just kept your mouth shut, enjoying what was now.
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A rare evening without Amelie or work was spent out. You were still young, still enjoying the thrill of a good club with friends so the bar was the place to go.
Your best friend begged to go to this new open bar, more similar to an night-club than bar but you didn't mind.
The first hour was spent upstairs in one of the more reserved booths, drinking and gossiping, spilling the recent tea and of coure the main topic was Trent.
She was dying to hear about it and you were dying to telll her. "No way he said that" she gasped, clapping her hands "Wow you go y/n, this is honestly wild"
You giggled, swallowing the rest of your drink "I know"
"What's next then? You almost kissed in his car and now?" "Now nothing" you sighed, shaking your head "What do you mean nothing"
"I mean that I haven't heard of him since then"
"Well text him then!" she exclaimed "I dont know" "Oh come on y/n you gotta do it, you are so smitten by him already and you never meet anyone"
"Lets drop this topic for tonight" you decided, sweeping the hard parts under the rug for now.
"Fine, let's go down and get the party started for real" she beamed sensing not to push you further right now.
"Yes please"
She giggled, hooking your arm with hers as you went down the sketchy stair to the club area, the night club you needed.
-
You were deep in your cups which was why you weren't sure if you actually saw who you thought you did or if you were hallucinating
"Y/n! Is that Trent??" your friend gaped making you realize it was actaully Trent and you gigggled, pulling her along with you as you tripped up to him, facing him with a bright smile
He was with a couple of friends, some you would probably recognize if it wasn't for the slight womble in your head
"Y/n??"
Trent eyed you up and down with a giant smirk, sensing your drunkness but he too were deep in his cups, immidiately dragging both you and your friend to their table.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, handing you another drink and pulling you to sit on his lap as there was limited space on the table he and a couple of his friends shared. Your friend immideately hitting it off with some of them.
"I have a rare night out" you grinned
"How convinient, I have to" he revealed, squeezing your thigh where your short dress had ridden up.
"How convinient" you smirked right back at him, your eyes dropping down to his lips a little too often
It wan't long until you couln't resist the urge to kiss him anymore. The clear part of our head would probably stop it right now because it was compliacted, you had Amelie, you couldn't just date around and bring people here and there but the rational part of your brain wasn't working right at the moment. Only wanting some sort of normality, some sort of attention tonight and Trent gladly gave it to you, so you took it.
The soft kiss turned heated, passionate and neeedy, hands grasping desperately at each other as your turned around on his lap. Only when the people around you started to make noises did you break apart for the moment, enjoying the night on his lap, his mouth on yours and hands caressing you whenever the moment allowed it. It was something completely different like this, when the kids wasn't around, when neither of you had to take the parent role, when you both were deep in your cups and didn't hold back. It was something completely different but so relieving.
--
He asked you out, actually asked you out. Not asking for a playdate with the kids, no. Alone, with you and it felt like the nerves would explode. You had met him for months now but it felt different after the bar meeting.
It had been heated, promising more than just parents of two friends. No, that had showed you he wanted more as well. The kisses shared, the touches ad the late, drunken question to come home with him. It all indicated that he wanted more of whatever it was between you.
You read his text again. You had agreeed on dinner in his flat. Neither of you wanted to do something public. Still it felt nerve-wracking. You hadn't been at his place before, always at yours for various reasons.
You hadn't gone home with him that night but what if he wanted something in that way tonight`?
did you want anything like that? Hell yes
How did you act with him, alone? Without being drunk
What do you wear to something like this?
You had no idea
After what felt like forever you finally emerged from your car outside of his complex, wearing sweats and a hoodie as he had told you after asking and making your way inside.
It was darn expensive, exclusive, luxaury celebrity building. You felt hella out of place, not only because of your clothes as you got escorted up to his floor. The secod you saw him though, it felt okay. The smile twinkling in his eyes as he welcomed you inside.
-
"This feels a bit weird" you smiled, sitting on his big comfy sofa. Stretching out your tired body on the comfortable furnitor.
Trent chuckled, pursing his lips "Well"
"Not bad" you promised "But weird, I'm not used to be alone with you. It's always the girls or the horny mums"
At that Trent couldn't contain his laughter "Horny mums?"
"Yeah you should hear them talk" you scoffed, shaking your head at them.
"I do, trust me" he chuckled, plopping down next to you in the sofa with two glasses of wine. "I just choose to ignore them most of the time" he smiled, handing you one of the glasses.
Your eyebrows raised as you turned to him with an unimpressed look "most of the times?"
"Well yeah, I mean I did not ignore you, did I?" he teased, showing his beutiful smile. Your eyes rolled "no but I'm not talking about how hot it would be to be fucked by a footballer or how perfect your back looks to scratch"
"Why don't you though?"
You choke on the wine you sipped, spluttering it out in your lap as you tried to contain yourself with laughter You looked at him deadpan, "you want me to?"
His shoulders shrugged and his face pulled a grimace, smirking at your flustered state "I wouldn't mind it"
"Really?" you hummed, looking at him from under your lashes while sipping your wine. Gaining your confidenece back "Oh Trent, I wanna scratch your back while you fuck me so hard" you ironized with a high-pitched voice.
Trent laughed, raising his glass towards you "Take away the irony and we are home"
You couldn't help but give him a bright smile, leaning your head towards him before straightening up to do your real performance. His eyes followed you amusedly as he watched you clear your throat before you repeated "Oh Trent, I wanna scratch your back while you fuck me so hard" but only this time you tried to make it sound real, moaning out the words with an additional moan afterwards.
Trent's amused face dropped slightly as you smirked at him "Better?" "Mhm" he nodded, giving you an impressed look "Wow, that's actually wild" he hummed causing you to laugh at him, shaking your head at his dramatics "That explains how you women are so good at faking things"
You hummed, nodding "Sure but you can hear a clear difference from an fake moan and a real moan"
Trent hummed, pouting his lips in thought "well sure"
You pursued tour lips "Do you know the differences?" Trent shrugged "Sometimes, I think most of the times I can tell"
"Have someone ever really faked it with you?" you giggled, "Sure" Trent chuckled, internaly palming himself for revealing that to you.
"Why?" "I don't bloody know, I guess they didn't like it?"
You laughed "Oh poor Trent, are you not that talented in bed?"
He only scoffed, giving you a face that only made you laugh harder "I'm sure am talented enough"'
You giggled, crawling closer to him before settling in his lap. It didn't feel weird, you had been in this position before. You wanted to take it one step further, wanted to be with him.
"What if I need proof?" you whispered, your voicie low and all serious as he swallowed, giving you a heated gaze "Well I think we can fix that, don't you think?" "I was hoping" you smirked, immediately atttacking his lips with yours.
His hands fell on your ass, pulling you closer as your hands tangled in his curls.
Screw all the complicated shit, screw all responsibilites. You would fix it all later, talk it all through later. This wasn't bound to change anything, except it was. You felt more than you wanted to admit.
Screw the feelings, you needed him right now and he felt the same.
His hands started to undress you, flinging your hoodie off and you let him but when his hands left your boobs and started to tease your underwear you stopped him.
"Hey" you mumbled, immideately grabbing his attention, brown eyes searching yours for any signs that he'd crossed the line.
You gently stroke his neck, smiling at his attentive expression. "Did I do something?" he asked softly, relief filling his body as you shook your head. "No no, I just-" you began, looking away from his intense gaze
"What?" he murmured, gently angling your face so that you looked at him again.
Your face felt warm as he looked at you "I-I just haven't had sex in.... forever" you admited shyly
"Forever? you do have a kid, right?"
You giggled loving how he tried to ease the embarrsament as your lips graced his shoulder. "A year" you clarified, looking away from his face as he raised his eyebrows in supriese "Really, wow I feel like i've been in a dryspell forever but a year... I would've alredy have cum now"
You giggled again, hiding your embaressment in admitting this to your lext lay but Trent was different. It wasn't just some hook-up, it was Trent. Someone you already had found a liking towards. Someone you felt comfortable with and trusted, someone you didn't feel embarrassed around.
He kept a loving smile on his face, kissing your cheek sweetly before speaking again. "It's nothing, as long as you want this we can take it as slowly as you want to and if you don't, we don't" he mumbled softly against the soft skin of your shoulder.
"I want to, just... take it slow" you breathed out, his head noddding in recognition as he continued his ministrations on your neck and collarbone. Leaving marks like a teenager would on your sensitive skin. It made you giggle, plafully pushing him away but he just gave you his millon-dollar grin and continued, knowing you liked it.
You started to ease into it. Not feeling as stiff anymore as you moved your body against his, making him let out an apreciative sound. "Yeah?" he mumbled, a word so short but still so hot to hear from his lips.
His hand creeped down your sweatpants, gently teasing the hem of your underwear, tripping under the waistband only to crawl back up. It was all a part of his slow show and you started to realise what you had really asked him.
You kissed him sweetly, passionately but soft. Searching his mouth with yours, hands grasping on his broad shoulders, slowly creeping down to finally feel his gorgously sexy abs.
His breath fanned your jaw as he watched your face every movement, only slipping his hand into your panties for real when you made strong eye-contact with him, pleadig with your eyes for him to keep going.
And keep going he did, finally lettig his fingers stroke over your swollen clit. His fingers moved expertisely, knowing exactly where it would feel the best and where to be to drive your mind absolutely crazy and needy.
He was so focused on your face as you let him play with you, enjoying it way to much to ever ask him to stop.
When your mind started to function again you let your hand slip under the waistband of his calvins. Quickly wrapping around his hard dick to give him some attention as well. Too soaked up in your own for quiet some time already.
He didn't complain, his eyes closing briefly and a hard breath escaping his open lips as you stroked him firmly. Trying to focus on him whilst he brought you to the edge, slipping two fingers inside of you.
Your body had gotten completely loose now. Moving on it's own accord, not caring anymore, not controlled by nerves but pleasure.
He could see exactly when your orgasm started to climb to it's top. Not daring to stop as your voice pleaded him not to. Your hand stopped aroud his dick, unable to focus as your orgasm washed over you. The sounds you let out fell deaf on your own ears, not to Trent's who only got harder as your body shook, fingers slowly retreating as you came down. Not wanting to overstimulate you at this state.
"Okay?" he smiled softly, the giggle you let out sounded free and happy "more than okay" you smiled, leaning up to kiss his lips lovingly. Hand resuming it's pace on his hard cock.
Soon enough you tugged at his boxers, wanting them off, wanting him inside of you.
He let you do what you wanted, helping to take off his boxers as he helped you out of your sweatpants. His hands gently cupped your breasts over your brah as you looked at each other. "You sure you want this?" he hummed, needing the consent "Yes, you?" you hummed back softly, "All I wanted to do since I first saw you" he consented, bringing a smile on your lips as he guided his tip to your entrance.
He rubbed oer your sensitive nerves, giving you time to relax again from the initional reaction to feeling his dick against the place you wanted him.
"Relax yeah?" he hummed softly, kissing over your chest, smiling against your skin as you complied. Relaxing your body against the soft material.
He fially pushed the tip in, your breath catching in your throat at the stretch. His lips a nice distraction, your arms wrapping around his shoulders as he kissed you passionately. Breathing in and swallowing your sounds.
It felt like an enternity until he finally stopped, fully inside you. You panted against his lips, trying to take in the feeling of complete blizz.
Fuck you had missed this
"Move" you breathed, his hips immediately following your words as he slowly started to thrust inside of you. Taking it slow as promised but it felt just as good as anything else. It wasn't about fucking the life out of you, it would be time for that later. No this was about connecting, making eachother feel pleasure and love and wow did he manage well.
You felt like all you could do was moan and whine, your body writhing on the soft cushions as he gave you all he had, rolling his hips into yours, filling you completely with each deep thrust.
He reached places you didn't even remembered you could or knew. It felt like you were floating on a cloud as his mouth found your skin again.
"Fuck I'm sorry" he breathed harshly on your jaw as he kissed his way up
"What?"
"I-I'm gonna cum" he breathed making you giggle out a moan "Fuck do it"
His fingers found your clit, gently stroking the sensitive nub as he quickened his pace slightly. His hips started to jerk as he got closer to his release, soon coming to an complete stop as he came, taking you with him in the blizz.
It felt like you blacked out. Letting your eyes fall close as he slipped of to the bathroom, helping you clean up and change clothes to sleep. He didn't bother making you brush your teeth or go to the toilet. You were already half-asleep so he just crawled down into the bed again. Kissing your shoulder and whispering soft praise for you as you drifted off to sleep in his comfortbale bed and warm embrace.
--
Awkvardness settled in your body as you looked down on the steeming hot cup of coffe he'd just handed you.
He looked as free as a bird, not an ounce of regret or questionmarks visable in the way he moved around the kitchen
You didn't regret it but now the hard conversation were bound to happen, the conversation you'd dreaded since you started to feel something about him. But again, he didn't look cornered at all, he looked the oposite to you and that also made you question this, question his feelings.
It wasn't long until he broke the silence, turning to you with an look you couldn't really decide if it was scolding, angry or amused. Maybe something inbetween it all.
"Why are you awkvard?"
He popped the question, just like that, cornered you even more than you already felt as you squirmed on the tall bar stool you sat on at his kitchen island.
"I'm not" you tried but he only chuckled, giving you a soft smile. "This dosen't have to be as hard as you make it out in your head"
"I dosen't?" you half mocked him but he stood his ground, shaking his head "No, it dosen't. I really like you" he stated, like it was the easiest thing ever to say
"And I think you like me too so what's the problem? Our kids already love eachother so why just not take it slowly, ease into it with them, keep it on the low, see eachother more and then move forward step by step. It dosen't have to be that hard. I'm sure of my feeling, it's not something casual or temporary"
You sat quite for a while "Well when you say it like that it sounds like the easiest thing in the world"
Trent chuckled, coming loser to you "It's not the easiset thing in the world but I like you too much to not give this a try"
You smiled leaning over the island to kiss him gently "I like you" you mumbled against his lips, feeling them curl into a smile against yours.
--
Sundays couldn't get better than this, the sun was out, mood happy and the birds were singing. Trent's hand in yours made a warmth spread in your chest. The girls ran in front of you, playing tag in a fit of giggles.
The soft morning had woken you up in the right mood, waking up alongside Trent was bound to wake you up in a good mood. Early morning sure but the way Tren't had made love to you first thing after waking up made your mood hit the good roof.
"I love this" you hummed, watching up at his beutiful smile under the baseball cap he'd pushed down over his curls, not wanting to be recognised.
You'd made it official, but not public. He had asked you to be his girlfriend one late night in front of the tv, cozied up together on the sofa. It had been only one clear answer on your tongue and since then things had changed for the better.
The worry of affecting your kids had been one that had proved not to be a problem, the girls already concidering the other best friends. Trying to explain had been a bit harder the girls not completely undestanding why they spent so mch time together at eachothers houses but they loved it neitherless.
"Me too" Trent hummed, glancing up at the girls "And I love you" he continued, turning to you again, tilting your head up to gently kiss you, a kiss you couldn't help but to smile into, holding his chin gently as he kissed you softly, intimately.
"Daddy!" "Mommy!"
You broke apart, giggling as you turned to your kids "Why is your daddy snogging my mommy!" Amelie protested but Ella only giggled making Amelie start to.
"Where have you learnt that word?" you asked her pointedly, her eyes blinking up at you "Trent told me it" she defended before they were off again.
"You taught her the word snogging??" you turned to him with a scoff "What?!" he exclaimed "The girls were using the word fucking so I told them not to say that and to say snog instead, choose your word woman!" he defended making you laugh "Okay okay, snogging is much better than fucking"
"Exactly" he smiled in victory as you continued to walk.
You'd never felt this kind of peace before in your life. It had always been something, something unsettling. But right now, right now it felt like peace, like nothing was hard or confusing. Everything was clear and you were happy, happiest you'd ever been.
And it all felt like it was coming together, peace had finally landed.
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bpcr3yes · 5 months
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Can you write about Valeria having child again😭😭 valeria mom headcanon cure all my ills
even if she is manipulative asf, I think she would be a very good and calm mom since her mom was very toxic, thinking about her daughter having to go through all she had to make her disgusted (in my head)
Reading this request made me change my thinking a little
Valéria would probably do her best to raise her daughter but sometimes it can be tiring, she would probably yell at her but apologize later because she doesn't want to be like the mother she had
After your daughter was born she didn't leave you for even a second in the first few months, she wanted to be close to the baby to help raise it, after the birth she always found a way to be at home, at lunch time, during afternoon or even at night taking you to dinner.
She would try to be a present mother, no matter how much the cartel demands a lot from her, she would always find a way to escape to be with her family.
Now let's imagine her daughter reaching teenager
We all know that teenagers are terrible, but pre-teens are even worse.
imagine her coming home and hearing her daughter yelling at you because you made something that she won't eat.
''¡¿Por qué le gritas a tu madre?! ¡¡¡Ella hace todo bien por ti y la tratas así?!!!'' She shouts at her daughter as she watches her climb the stairs of the mansion and go to her room, slamming the door
''María, ven aquí ahora y discúlpate con tu madre, AHORA.'' She screams while waiting a few seconds for your daughter to come back and apologize to you but that doesn't happen a scream is heard
''Déjame en paz mamá!!'' Your daughter shouts up the stairs, Valeria huffs in anger as she threatens to go up but you stop her first.
''Relax Ria, leave her alone for a while.'' you say in a tired tone as you dry your hands on the kitchen towel, the two of you didn't always argue but lately it's been happening a lot
You hear Valeria snort as she climbs the stairs ignoring your calls, you just shake your head slightly in denial knowing full well what would happen next
It is possible to hear some of Valéria's screams in Spanish, she was probably giving her girl a lecture but the screams gradually diminish until there is only silence
silence, this makes you raise your head worriedly as you start to climb the stairs, heading towards your daughter's room you peek through the crack in the door, the view you have makes your heart warm
Valéria hugging her daughter while murmuring a short sermon in Spanish to her, leaning against the door frame watching the scene with a smile on her face, daughter comes to you apologizing for having shouted.
''Lo siento mamá, no debería haberte gritado.'' She murmurs as she buries her head in your chest, you tell her it's okay, your gaze lifts to Valeria who looks at you with a smug smile.
''You spoiled her a lot'' Valeria mumbles as she approaches you, stroking her daughter's hair.
''Someone has to do it, right?'' you smile at her while placing a kiss on the top of your child's head
Valéria just shakes her head slightly as she walks through the door ''Come on corazon, let's have lunch uh.'' She mutters as she sees her daughter walk down the stairs.
Before you can get down she grabs you hugging you from the back, you laugh softly as you feel your wife bury her head in your neck
you turn to face her, wrapping your arms around her neck as you smile sweetly at your loving wife.
''you're a good mother Valeria.'' I murmur as I caress the back of her neck lightly. ''our daughter is lucky to have a mother like you''
Valeria's eyes shine when she hears this, small tears form in her eyes as she lets out a small sigh.
''I try to be.'' she murmurs while shaking her head to keep the tears away, you lean in and capture her lips in a sweet kiss that doesn't last long because of your daughter's screams down the stairs
''we better go before she starves to death.'' valéia laughs as she grabs you hand going down the stairs.
she couldn't help but say thank you as she held her rosary, thanking her for having a family like this.
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deltaromeo3 · 11 months
Text
ɴᴏ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀꜱᴛ — Daniel Ricciardo
pairing: Daniel Ricciardo x childhood bestfriend!Reader
summary: Finally returning home after a few years, she reunites with her long time bestfriend; the all too famous Formula 1 driver, Daniel Ricciardo. Will things rehash between them or will it take a turn for the worst?
previous chapters here: #2 | #3
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Perth, Australia. It’s where you called home ever since you were 7. It’s been years since you’ve been back home but today you had a reason for your arrival; it was your mother’s birthday and she was turning fifty.
Usually, you would skip coming home at all costs. But this time, your mother begged you to come because apparently turning the big five and having you around to celebrate was a huge deal for her. Which was weird because all these while she was usually fine with not having you around and wine with a birthday card seemed to do the trick.
But somehow with enough convincing, you eventually gave in because she said that your sister would be there too, and you used that as a good enough reason to come back.
You avoided home like the plague, always telling your mother you were extremely busy, getting caught up in work and other stuff so you couldn’t afford to take a break and fly home.
But was that really the reason for your absence?
And now, here you were, a day early, standing outside the house you grew up in. Memories came flooding back but you were quickly snapped back to reality when your dad came out to help you with your luggage.
“You alright there darling?” He asked, a look of concern obvious on his face.
You smile and nod, “Yeah, I'm good.”
He just smiled in response and the both of you walked towards the door. As soon as you entered the house you were greeted by your sister hugging you so tightly you thought you were gonna pass out.
You laughed and hugged her back with as much force. Once you let go, you walked over to the kitchen.
“Ugh I feel like it’s been years since I last saw you.” She says, leaning on the entrance of the kitchen.
“That’s because it has been years.” You say as you poured yourself a cup of water.
“What? It can’t be that long ago, right?” Denial present in her voice.
You closed the fridge door. “Yeah it has,” You sipped on your drink. “I was here when Ella got married, remember? Her kid is three now. Three.” You held three fingers up close to your sister's face, annoying her as a result.
“Three huh? Just like his-’’
Before she could finish her sentence, she was interrupted by your mother coming down the stairs.
“What’s all the noise about? Has the prodigal daughter returned home?”
You quickly glanced over to your sister, giving her the “oh god i’m not ready for this” look but all she does is flash you a tight-lipped smile.
Your mother walks over to you with open arms, hugging you. She lets go of the hug, holding your sides to take a good look at you but it felt like she was examining you instead…
“Are you sleeping well? You’ve got bags under your eyes.”
There it is.
She points at them but you just smile through it.
You glanced over to your sister as if you knew what was gonna happen.
“It’s nice to see you too Ma,” You reply, unamused.
“I’m just saying you look tired is all.”
You sighed, opening your mouth to respond but was interrupted by your sister chiming in. “It’s probably the jet lag, you know how it is.”
She understood that it was too soon for you to receive criticism from your own mother. You literally just arrived.
Your sister leaves the kitchen, making pointless conversation with your mother to distract her as they walked towards the living room.
You turned to the sink, washing the cup trying to distract yourself.
“Don’t think so much about it, you know how she is.” Your dad reassures you.
“I know I know…” You sigh.
“I’m just glad you’re home, we missed you tons. Especially your mother.”
“It’s kinda hard to believe that. All she ever does when we meet is criticize me or my looks.”
Your dad chuckles. He ruffles your hair and leaves. Before he walks away he says, “I now know why you were so eager to leave.”
You chuckled at the statement.
-
After having dinner, everyone was seated in the living room, watching TV together. You stared blankly at the sixty inch screen, some movie on Netflix playing.
You groan out of boredom.
You stood up, deciding that taking a walk was better than sitting around watching some lame movie.
You grab your jacket along the way out.
“Where ya off to?” Your mom asks.
“Gonna take a walk, haven’t been home in a while.”
She hums in response and you exit the house, closing the door behind you.
You decided that the corner shop was the place you wanted to go. You immediately walked towards the all too familiar path, leading you past a few houses before eventually arriving to the store. Once you arrive, it brought you back to the times where you, Ella and a few other of your friends used to hang out together after school… One person in particular you could not forget.
You smiled to yourself when you reminisced about the good old times but was quickly returned back to the present when you heard someone call out your name.
-
A/N: Hope you enjoyed that :)) This is my first time writing so do leave me feedback (good OR bad) so I know how I can improve for the next upcoming parts!!
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From Sarge’s kids I think I’m (as of now) excited to learn more about Daisy. She’s got a lot of Elvis in her and she witnesses Elaine go to hell and back to help him beat his addiction and although she’s independent I hope there’s gonna be someone who will be able to do the same for her or stand by her. Not to mention she’s got a twin who they come off as polar opposites (what with Rosalee being a huge Daddy’s girl) and her comments towards her older sister Ella’s marriage - I get the feeling there’s a lot to unpack there.
I think sometimes Elvis felt like he was too much to love and I see a lot of his personal insecurities in Daisy, she even is a popstar like him and that’s a lot of people loving you with maybe them feeling like they aren’t really known for who they are deep down.
I am so happy to hear this, I’ve got a little started on each kid’s own fic (I want one for each like I had for Jesse, just to establish them and then let loose with the intermingling) and I really think hers is compelling. It’s been truly a blast to get to know her and I’ve gotta be honest she may be the most Lisa-like of any Sarge kid in many ways, partly because she’s so Elvis incarnate. It took awhile but me and my scheming buddies have cooked up a good partner for her and she will always have her family as backup and even her godfather Marlon. I think she will, as you said, be publicly adored but can be rather offputting one on one, even though she desperately needs connection. I think eventually, and not after too long, all these relationships get far better, and Daisy finds her little nook in the family easily. She is the one to go to for the zero bullshit takes or help hiding a body. Loyal and fierce that one.
And here, since you made my day asking about her, have a little random snippet I’ve written about her first big debut recording which came from her rehab scribbles and, unfortunately for the family members her lyrics feature -becomes a sensation.
Era: 1978-9ish??
Warnings: moderate…mentions of past divorce, infidelity, a daughter sorta writing a hit tell all? remincence of a one off threesome and Elvis having straight man panic for it (I’m afraid this couple is polyamorous central I’m the 60’s but nothing explicit) big ole family chat with the grown kids, chaos as can be expected…
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What about Wendy?
“Daisy Mae!” Elvis bellows her full name because the crime warrants it, and from behind him, her voice answers, not in person from her place sprawled on the couch but behind him, coming through the stereo in a clear cadence that his creative side must acknowledge is skilled and evocative. What Elvis doesn't find so praiseworthy is his Dear Daughter hanging the family laundry out for all to see with lyrics like:
—“So I'll lock the window and turn on the AC, You'll throw your rocks, and you'll scream that you hate me, But it gets old being forever 20, And what about my wings? What about Wendy?”—
out on a clothesline for all the world to commentate on his failings and his marriage.
The music video coming out tomorrow on MTV, teased as featuring a fresh faced Daisy in a montage of her mother’s most iconic looks -including that secretive wedding gown so few of the nation ever saw, rather hammers home the not so subtle point. As far as Elvis is concerned this is about as disloyal as it gets.
And he is having none of it.
“It’s art, Daddy.” Daisy murmurs, utterly unphased by the hurricane of wrath she can match once she gets that cup of coffee Rosalee is making her.
“Is this how you see us?” Elvis demands and Jesse winces to the side, things had been going so smoothly after Danny was born but lord, the Presley’s just can’t manage to be calm for long, Daisy had to record that stupid black book she scribbled in during rehab and, my does it have some choice takes on the events of the last decade. “This how you see your childhood?” Elvus goes on, “Where we loved ya like no one’s ever loved any kids and gave ya everythin’ and-“
“-and slammed a buncha doors in between.“ Daisy shrugs, not meaning to be cruel, but it’s the truth and she’s never had her sibling’s affinity for the affection that the rest of the kids take as blood money for the insanity they got put through. Daisy doesn't hold a grudge against anyone for her childhood, in fact, she’s thankful for the writing material. But she’s not gonna be sorry for writing shit as it was.
Which was mama playing a haggard Wendy while Daddy flitted in and out of the window at whim like Peter Pan.
“Girl,” her daddy begs her to understand as he takes his seat next to her on the sofa, big ringed hand familiar and pleading on her bony knee, as if somehow this appeal of his will lock the song back into her diary and out of the radio -or maybe he doesn’t care about his reputation anymore, he’s gotten lax about that after the divorce, maybe he really is seeking after his child’s good opinion this time when he continues, “I’m all for art’n’shit but have I not taught ya nothin’ bout-“
“Daddy, ya didn’t even write your own songs.” Daisy gently tries to get him to see the difference in their art but Jesse gasps out in horror:
“Daisy!!” like she just shot their father instead of stating the truth. Which is kinda her problem with her family, they can’t take straight facts.
“Alright, alright then,” Elvis simmers a bit but his tone is restrained as he presses his point, “so ya write from the heart and ya wrote about life, I get ya. So then why’d you call mama Wendy when, w-w-when she’s -she’s my Tinkerbell?”
“You’d rather I used your pet little name in public?” Daisy scoffs at his muddled logic and feels bad for the first time after -soon as his brow furrows in genuine hurt. Daddy loves mama, he loves her again like a new man and Daisy doesn’t get how that works but it’s the truth and she’s got no fight to pick with the truth. It makes her admit with a shrug, “I used it ‘cause Marlon always says she’s Wendy.”
You could hear a pin drop the way everyone’s chatter in the living room stops, even the coffee maker stops spluttering in the distance and it’s highly likely Jesse isn’t even breathing as everyone’s head’s swivel, Daddy’s slower but more intent than any, to look at Elaine where’s she sits in the white arm chair, blanket cast over her where Danny fell asleep while nursing. She’s as white as the rocker she sits in.
“Oh does he now?” Elvis rumbles and Daisy feels the unintentional bite of his nails on her knee.
“Well yeah, he does and -always has.” Daisy insists as if the past and present existence of Brando’s opinions on Elvis’ wife makes shit any better, Daisy knows it the second she lets it out that it’s not exactly balm on the scab.
Her voice doesn't make anyone look away from mama and her perfect, frozen face, carefully neutral and soothingly disinterested in the topic.
“That man has only ever called me, Elaine.” mama laughs an airy, dismissive little thing and the bite of Daddy’s rings on Daisy’s knee loosens their grip. “And if he thinks i'm a Wendy -he should say it to my face.” she jokes and Jesse predictably lets out a pained laugh of solidarity.
“-A-a-and w-who the hell did ya get to sew all those recreated outfits, girl?” Daddy is suddenly back on the original topic with a burst of renewed incredulity at her gall and Daisy knows she can use this to her advantage, get him arguing about fashion, tailors and supporting local folks instead of berating her for her lyrics and-
-Ella watches as Elaine’s stiff face smoothes into relief and she lays her head back against the rocker’s cushion and closes her eyes against the hubbub that’s no longer pertinent to her. Not for the first time Ella wonders if mama is as burdened as she is with thoughts and feelings married women shouldn’t have, they really shouldn’t. Marriage should cure a woman of them but Ella had them all alone on the ranch with her husband gone and Mama had Marlon and his lingering looks and her frozen face whenever his name gets mentioned and mama who is staring up at the ceiling like she’s no longer in the room with them at all.
“Peter Pan, Peter Pan, little lost boy actin’ like a big man,” only Marlon could have made that rhyme sound like anything but a goad, only Marlon really saw what Elaine saw when Elvis was sated, pliable, sweet as a newborn and pretty a sin. “Those producers who’ve got him playin’ tough n’ shit don’t know his appeal, they just don’t get it. Goddamn Peter Pan.”
And he had run his fingers over Elvis’ face, catching his drooping eyelids and pulling them down and over his nose to those cherub lips. And Elvis’ eyes hadn’t opened again till next morning when he woke in angry panic.
Elaine stares at the ceiling and feels Danny shift against her breast, snuggling closer, and she wonders if Elvis ever recalls that night like she does. Ever replays it a million times.
Wendy, Wendy Wendy.
Marlon thinks she’s Wendy, Marlon’s told her own daughter that. But never her. No. He’d just raked his hand through the wrecked coiff of Elvis’ gelled hair and admiringly called him Peter Pan. And Elvis, being Elvis in the state of freshly loved and freshly praised, never balked at it before drifting to sleep in their muggy tent.
Wendy, Wendy, Wendy, he never called Elaine that to her face.
Elaine catches Daisy’s eye next time she looks away from the ceiling, an odd moment of recognition. Funny how each child knows a part of her, but it’s the inner workings of Daisy’s curious, generous, honest self -a heart so very like Elvis’ own- that can look back at Elaine and smile at her, while knowing her fully, faults and all. It’s not so bad having grown daughters as a friend, Elaine decides as she watches Elvis flail backwards against the couch to laugh at his daughter's good natured dig at his unmodified wardrobe.
It’s good not to be his only Wendy keeping him young anymore.
Song based on: Wendy by Maisie Peters
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hslllot · 1 year
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insieme in paradiso
“together in paradise”
rated m | 2.7k words
better late than never, right? this is a short piece for my dear friend’s @harry-on-broadway​ fic challenge (the prompts used are in bold)! It is basically an extended version of this concept I wrote back in 2021... We’ve had such great latam content lately that I feel like I should have adjusted the setting of this, but I hope you enjoy anyways! As always, please let me know what you think. xx shan
———
Was this heaven?
You were certain that you’d never felt more relaxed as you bathed in the Tuscan sunlight. Lounging beside your love, you let your eyes close, the book you were reading abandoned in the sand next to your chair ages ago. Every worry, every stressor, every bit of tension in your muscles that you carried with you drifted away in the winds of the ocean breeze. 
This was the private getaway with Harry you’d been longing for. It seemed like forever since the two of you were able to spend an extended amount of time alone together. 
“Mum just posted this photo. Look. Thea’s getting so big.” Your boyfriend interrupted your daze when he reached out from beside you to shove his phone in your face.  
You opened your eyes slowly and lowered your sunglasses so you could take a proper look. Using your hand to shield the glare of the Italian sun, you saw on his screen an Instagram story his mother had posted of his cousin’s baby. 
“She’s adorable, H.” You responded, adjusting your sunglasses back to cover your eyes. “We should give Ella a call later, maybe we can FaceTime.” All you heard in response was a short grunt as he laid back in his chair, eyes still fixed on his screen.
He was grumpy and you could tell. 
One thing about your boyfriend of three years, which you found incredibly endearing, was that he loved his family more than anything. Unfortunately, when his family was gathered and he couldn’t be there, he’d tend to get a bit pouty. You’d find him glued to the group chat or Instagram to get updates on what they were up to. Sometimes you would catch him ‘liking’ or ‘reacting’ to their posts and stories (on his private account of course) in an attempt to make himself feel more included. 
Birthdays. Weddings. Babies. There was a long list of family events he often had to miss because of his job, and you knew it weighed heavily on his heart. 
A small part of you was slightly annoyed that he wished he were somewhere else. But another part of you, perhaps the more compassionate part, understood that multiple truths could exist at once: 1) He was happy to be spending time with you, 2) he was grateful for his job that took him to beautiful countries and allowed him to live a lavish life, and 3) he missed his family dearly. 
But sometimes you didn’t understand why he wouldn’t just go home and visit them whenever he felt like it. He certainly could afford it, and he had the power in all of his business relationships to take a vacation whenever he felt like it. Sometimes you wished he had more of a ‘diva’ type attitude when it came to certain things, like allowing himself to take breaks from work. However, another thing about your boyfriend was that he was a chronic overachiever and people pleaser with a tendency to overcommit to new projects. And you figured it wasn’t so bad to have a partner in life who was considerate of other peoples’ time and feelings. 
Plus, you couldn’t complain much because his commitment to a new project was how you found yourself at the beautiful, private, Il Pellicano in Tuscany. 
The two of you were finally spending some much needed quality time together. Coordinating your schedules had been an absolute nightmare and it was a miracle that you were able to take some time away from work to join him on this trip. He was technically here on business, preparing for the launch of his Gucci collection with Alessandro. But you had spent the majority of the trip together, watching him model his clothing, sitting side-by-side on the small private beach of your villa, and wrapped around one another in the bedroom.
At the moment though, Harry’s frustration, guilt, and longing to be with his family was threatening to penetrate the bubble of relaxation surrounding you. You could feel the restless energy emanating off of him. Without opening your eyes you heard the way he moved around in his chair and sighed under his breath as he scrolled through his phone and typed away messages in his family group chat. When you finally did open your eyes you found him on his stomach, his head at the other end of the chair near your feet, and his phone two inches from his face. And while this position afforded you a great view of his tanned back and taut muscles glistening in the Italian heat, clad only in a small pair of black swimming shorts, you could feel the tension radiating from him and you couldn’t ignore it any longer. 
You reached across and placed your hand on the back of his calf, rubbing your thumb back and forth against his warm, sun-kissed skin, as if to soothe him.
“Hey baby?”
“Hmmm?” He responded mindlessly, not bothering to look up from his phone. 
“Hey, look at me.” You urged, squeezing his calf to gain his attention. 
“Sorry” he murmured, putting his phone down. He twisted in the lounge chair to face you, sitting up to give you his full attention. You reached for his hand and intertwined your fingers with his. 
“I was thinking… I know we’re supposed to head back to London on Sunday, but what if we took a few days in Holmes Chapel?” He raised an eyebrow at you curiously, wordlessly asking where this had come from. You continued, “It’s been so long since we’ve seen Anne and I miss her… Plus, we’ve only seen Thea once since she’s been born. I think I can extend my vacation by a few days.”
He sat there for a moment silently, teasing at his bottom lip.
“I have a meeting with Lambert and Molly on Monday in London.” He winced, remembering his prior commitment.
“Surely you can do it over Zoom. Or just push it a couple days. You are the boss, aren’t you?” 
Something flickered in his eyes and a slight smirk crept his lips at your mention of him being the boss. 
His gears were turning and you knew him well enough to know the battle going on inside his brain. He probably didn’t love the idea of moving a meeting to go see his mum, but since it was technically your idea it was like a free pass. He could feel less guilty about it because he was doing it for you. 
(Obviously you both knew this was entirely for him… But you needn’t say it)
You thought he might pass on the opportunity, and were startled when he removed his hand from yours and scrambled up from his lounge chair. He quickly moved onto your chair, straddling you with his entire body weight pinning you down. With his forearms rested on either side of your head, he placed quick kisses all over your face. Almost reflexively, you wrapped your hands around his biceps. His hot, sinewy arms flexed in your grip. 
“Yeah,” is all he said before placing a long, slightly wet, kiss on your forehead. “I AM the boss. And I would like that very much. Thank you for suggesting it.” Unable to wipe the smile from his face, he placed one more tender kiss on your lips.
You reached for the sunglasses that sat atop his head and removed them, freeing space for you to run your fingers through his soft brown curls. “You’re welcome, H.” He lowered into your touch, eager for a cuddle. “But you have to get up. You’re squishing me.”
“Right, sorry.” He removed himself from on top of you and took a seat by your feet at the end of the chair. It was his turn to soothe you now, grazing his palm along your calf and up to your knee, which he gave a squeeze before dragging his hand back down.
“I think it’s time we get out of the sun, yeah?” The sly look on his face was all too familiar as his gaze trailed down your bikini-clad body. “You’re lookin’ a little sunburnt.”
“Am I?” You teased.
“I’ve got something I can rub on it back in our room.”
You rolled your eyes at him, feigning annoyance at his flirtation. Nonetheless, you knew where this was headed.
Gathering your belongings hastily, you were both eager to make your way back to the air conditioned room that held your luxurious king bed. You trailed behind Harry, climbing the stone steps up to the private entrance of your villa hand in hand. 
Once inside your room, you dropped your tote bag and walked over to the balcony, sliding open the curtains and the door to let the sunshine and salt air filter through the room. Looking out at the scene below, you could see the private beach where you and Harry had spent your morning and admired the way the Tuscan sun illuminated the sapphire blue ocean ahead. You took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly as you felt Harry come to stand closely behind you.
“Thank you for bringing me here.” You said quietly. Harry wrapped his arms around you from behind, allowing you to rest your chin on his forearms. He nuzzled his face into your neck where he left a delicate touch of his lips.
“Thank you for being here with me.” He responded. 
Any annoyance you previously felt toward your boyfriend’s proclivity for FOMO melted away when you realized how grateful you were to be here with him. In the chaos of his busy life, while he missed his family deeply, he chose to be here with you, together in paradise. 
You turned yourself in his arms, your body flush against his, to find his soft, yet intense, gaze on your lips. 
Harry held lightly onto your hips. Leaning in, his lips parted, and you could feel his warm breath against yours. You placed your hands on his chest, his skin burning under your fingers. With every shallow intake of breath he edged closer, until finally catching your top lip between his.
His hands trailed up your sides as your kiss became deeper, fuller. You felt like you might melt against him, heat racing down to every part of your body that was touching his. He roamed your curves and the expanse of your back, pressing you even closer to him, before finding the strings that held together your bikini. With two gentle tugs, the piece of fabric fell to the ground. 
He broke away from your kiss only briefly to study the sight of you, topless, in front of him. “Bellissima,” he whispered, his voice deep and slow. You saw the muscles in his jaw tick as his gaze burned holes through you. It was your turn, this time, to grab onto him and press him closer against you, feeling his hardness. 
It wasn’t long before Harry’s mouth started to move down your body. Your neck, your collarbone, your chest. His tongue dragged over your nipple before sucking it into his mouth and an intoxicating heat rippled through you. 
“Bed, please” was all you could muster under your breath. Harry reluctantly pulled himself off you and started walking you back, stopping when the back of your legs hit the bed. He gently lowered you onto the bed and resumed his work dragging his mouth down your body, finishing off with a chaste kiss to your hip bone.  
He stood up straight at the edge of the bed, towering over you. Eager for him, you removed your bikini bottoms and tossed them to the floor. 
“A bit impatient?” He chuckled, looking down hungrily at your naked body. You didn’t bother to respond, leaning back on your forearms, you kicked your leg out and toed at the tent in his black swimming shorts, encouraging him to take them off. “Tell me” he said sternly.
“I want them off.”
He pulled his shorts down and discarded them on the floor before climbing on to the bed. You admired the way he wrapped his hand around his cock and began slowly stroking himself, a small sense of relief evident on his face. He lowered himself over you and pressed his lips to yours. While your tongues met, the pads of his fingertips began to explore, trailing delicately down your stomach. Your body responded to his familiar touch, goosebumps racing over you and a fire simmering in your belly. 
You were desperate for him, your body begging for him to touch you as his fingers made their way down to your heat. A heavy moan left your lips when he began running circles over your clit. At that moment, you were completely overwhelmed by him. The way his lips felt against yours, the taste of his tongue, the scent of his cologne, the soft pads of his fingers on your most sensitive spot. 
“I want you,” you whined.
“You have me,” he answered teasingly, his mouth only a fraction of an inch away from yours. He dragged his finger down and dipped into your entrance. “Fuck - you’re so wet.”
“Please…”
At your begging he positioned himself between your legs, removed his fingers, and replaced them with a press of his hips against yours, the tip of his cock firm against your slit.  
Your hands grappled to hold on to any part of him you could, eventually landing on his shoulders. Gripping tightly, your fingertips dug into his skin. You wrapped your ankles around his calves and felt the way his body fit perfectly against yours.
The first thrust inside you was slow. Every inch of your body pulled tight around him as he sank deeper. Your breath hitched as a wave of pleasure raced through you. 
“Fuck,” Harry rasped as he rocked into you. The sound of his voice sent a tingle down your spine. “I love you so much,” he whispered into your skin, brushing a kiss across your jaw. 
You said it back to him as the two of you moved against each other, getting lost in the feelings of love and undulating pleasure between you. 
———
You and Harry spent the rest of the day immersed in one another in your private villa. 
The last go around, you unraveled together with his face buried in your neck while you were clutched tight around him. 
He pulled out and collapsed beside you, trying to catch his breath. 
You turned on your side to look at him, flooded with warmth and giddiness as you acknowledged how handsome he was. You used the tip of your finger to trace the lines of his face. The sharp cut of his jaw, the slope of his nose, the full of his lips. As you were about to trace your thumb over his eyebrow he grabbed your hand, bringing it to his lips. 
“Thank you again for suggesting we go to Holmes Chapel after this,” he said against your hand, still pressed to his lips. 
“Of course,” You moved closer to him and he let go of your hand in order to wrap his arms around you. “You can go home whenever you want, you know.” 
He placed a soft kiss on the top of your head. “I know. It’s easier to go when I know you’re coming with me.”
You hummed in understanding and pressed your lips against his chest.
“I should give Jeffrey a call and ask him to make the travel arrangements for us… And postpone my meetings.” 
As if on cue, his phone’s ringtone chimed from his tote bag on the floor by the door. He was reluctant to let go of you, but you gave him a look of approval that had him scrambling out of the bed to retrieve it. You took the opportunity to admire his naked body, silently thanking the Italian sun and his morning cardio routine for the glorious sight of him. 
You felt a warmth in your chest, though, at the smile that grew on his face when he looked down at his phone to see who was calling.
“Hey mum, yeah….guess what…I’m coming home.”
———
Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think. 
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philomenie · 5 days
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Once in a lifetime
Pairing: Joakim x Mina
This is my first story to be published, so I'm very nervous.
i hope i've put all the content warnings, if i've forgotten anything, please let me know.
I would like to mention that English is not my mother tongue.
CN fluff, smut, anxiety, trauma, relationship anxiety, difficult situations, mention of betrayal of trust, cheating, mention of accident and scars,unprotected sex (USE CONDOMS!) p in v, oral sex f receiving, f dom, 18+
@valiantroeagleangel
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FIVE
Mina
The mood couldn't be better, you notice Ella's look and the silent communication between her and Joakim, relief spreads through you. Ella seems to have accepted the situation and given him a chance.
That's all you wanted, you're happy.
Here under the starry sky, in his strong arms, you feel safer and more secure than you have for a long time. The last time you had this feeling was as a child.
You loll over comfortably, Joakim turns you towards him so that you can look him in the eye.
He exhales harshly and you stroke a small strand of hair behind his ear. He shivers under your touch.
"Mina, what do you say, all or nothing?"
"Wh-what?" you stutter, taken by surprise.
He leans his forehead against yours and closes his eyes.
"The way I feel about you, Mina... I didn't think I could ever feel this way about a woman again. You took me completely by surprise. It's only since I met you that I've realized what I've been missing all this time. I don't want to push you, but I'm asking you if you're ready to take me as I am. Are you ready to want Joakim and Jolly? Do you need more time... if so, I'll wait until you know if you feel the same way. Tell Mina, do you need time?"
The words just bubble out of him.
"Do you want me?"
You break away a little, look at his face, a pained expression around his eyes.
You stroke his face and feel tears rolling down your cheeks.
And yes, you know it, you know that you want him. How this is supposed to work is irrelevant to you at the moment.
"Yes," you breathe.
He closes his eyes, you see that tears are rolling down his cheeks too, then he kisses you, gently at first, then more and more hungrily, you both forget your surroundings, the only thing that matters is the two of you.
As you separate again, you realize the looks on the others' faces - enthusiastic, friendly and affectionate looks.
You laugh with relief.
Joakim is probably feeling the same way, he smiles too and pulls you close again, giving you a kiss on the cheek.
"All the way or not at all?" he asks you again.
"All the way!" you answer emphatically.
Joakim fishes for his cell phone, unlocks it and hands it to Ethan across from you.
"Ethan, would you please take photos of us?"
You look at him questioningly.
"All or nothing!" he grins.
Ethan clears his throat and both of you look at Ethan with a smile.
Then Joakim loosens his hair, which flows in dark cascades over his shoulder, he does the same with your clip so that your curls fall down unruly to pull you close to him and kiss you.
Your hair covers most of your faces.
"Did you get the shots?" asks Joakim?
"Yes, they turned out well!" grins Ethan, "Which isn't necessarily down to you, but to Mina!" he teases Joakim.
"That's perfectly clear to me!" he replies dryly.
He briefly scrolls through the photos and selects the last one, opens his Instagram account, types a short text, adds the photo and before you can protest, he presses post.
You look at him wide-eyed.
"It's all or nothing Mina, I really mean it!"
Under your photo, in which you are kissing intimately, but you are unrecognizable because of your flood of hair, is the following sentence:
Luckiest man in the world, I've got my girl!
By now it's late, Claire, Lucas and Haru want to go back to the dorm, Ethan offers to drive them. Ella looks at you questioningly.
"Come on then, Ella, Anshu, we'll drive you back!" you offer.
You want to go back to the hotel too. As much as you enjoyed the evening, you finally want to be alone with Joakim. Explore his body, feel him with all your senses.
As if he has guessed your thoughts, he looks at you with darkening eyes. You feel hot and cold.
When you finally arrive in your hotel room, he immediately pulls you back into his arms.
Hot kisses cover your face, neck and throat, his hands eagerly explore your body.
You moan ecstatically.
"If you don't want something, or if something makes you uncomfortable, tell me!" he presses out between kisses. "Tell me what you want, where you want me to touch you, kiss you!"
"I want to be touched and kissed, I want to be touched and kissed by YOU, min Svensk!"
Joakim caresses your earlobe with a smile "Min Svensk? Is that so?"
"Yes, it is!" you explain.
"Then that's the way it is!" he confirms simply.
He slowly unbuttons your cardigan, lets it slide to the floor and then touches your bare arms with his fingertips.
He traces your tattoo on the inside of your right forearm, three lilies tied together with a ribbon, then over the broken heart on your hand.
You stand still, eyes closed, then he takes your top to pull it over your head and you willingly let him do it.
You feel goose bumps forming all over your body and shiver, eyes still closed.
Joakim strokes along your collarbone with both hands, moving down your sides to your hips.
He gently caresses your scar, which makes you flinch a little. He immediately lets go of the spot.
You take his hand and guide it back, now looking into his eyes and nodding in agreement.
His hands continue to wander along your body, he circles you, now exploring your back, he gently pulls your hair forward, he traces your spine, where there is another tattoo of you, various mandala symbols and tendrils.
Then he stands close to you, his hands move forward to the buttons of your jeans, his breathing is heavy, you feel every breath in your exposed neck, his erect cock presses against your butt in his tight jeans.
You can't help but reach back and pull his head into the crook of your neck, at the same time pressing yourself even closer to his abdomen.
Joakim moans softly, his hands undo the first button, then the second, the third, the fourth...
When your jeans are completely open, he gently runs his thumb along the waistband of your panties and you bite your lower lip.
"Keep going!" you urge him!
Excruciatingly slowly, he pulls your jeans down, you can't wait any longer and impatiently kick them off, making him laugh harshly and darkly.
"Why so impatient, mitt Hjärta?" he teases you.
"You know that for a fact!"
He laughs again and covers your neck with kisses once more.
His hands wander back to your upper body, he gently runs his thumbs over your breasts, lingering on the stiff nipples that stand out sharply against the lace of your bra, playing with them, making you moan louder.
He reaches back to undo the clasp, pausing briefly, waiting for your consent, which you readily give, "Yes" coming from your lips.
As your bra falls to the floor, he caresses the bare skin of your breasts, takes your nipples between his fingers, squeezes lightly, which drives you completely insane, you start to move your hips rhythmically, rubbing against his erection, which makes him groan and gives you a delicious tug between your legs.
He slowly reaches down to your panties. With both hands, he slowly pulls it down, you inhale sharply and can hardly wait to be free of the piece of fabric.
At knee height, you push your panties to the floor and kick them out of the way with your foot.
You are now completely naked.
Joakim runs his hands over your thighs, he pauses again at the scar, you nod, he resumes the movement, kisses your neck again, your earlobe, you sink against him, your hands grab his hips, you pull him towards you, feel his trembling erection in your butt crack.
You let go of him and turn around, his eyes widen in desire, his gaze sweeps over you like a hungry predator eyeing its prey.
You confidently meet his gaze.
Watch him closely.
You reach out to him, "Take off your clothes! I want to see you!"
Without hesitation, Joakim pulls his hoodie and T-shirt over his head at the same time.
"Stop, let me touch you!"
You come closer, tracing the tattoo on his chest with your index finger, the diamond, the woman's head, the bird, the roses.
He gasps as he feels your fingers, then his arms, you circle him.
Surprised, you recognize another tattoo on his back, an eagle and swallows, you trace the fine lines, then his spine, vertebra by vertebra, Joakim trembles under your touch.
When you stand in front of him again, you reach for his waistband without breaking eye contact. You undo his button and pull the zipper down, feeling his hard cock tremble as he sucks in a sharp breath of air.
Then you pull his jeans down, following the movement, still looking at him.
You help him out of his tight pants and slowly come up, stroking his legs. Your hands rest on his hips, you reach into the waistband of his tight boxer shorts and carefully pull them down, Joakim moans with his mouth open, sweat beading on his forehead.
When he is free of his underpants, you move back a little to get a full view of him.
Roughly, he asks you, "Do you like what you see?"
Smiling, you nod, "Yes, I really like what I see!"
You walk towards him, your hands bury themselves in the hair at the back of his head, you kiss him hungrily and press yourself against him.
His arms wrap around you, lift you up, he takes you to the large king-size bed, bends over it with you in his arms, gently lays you down, you let go of him briefly to crawl upstairs, he immediately follows you.
He stops at your belly button and presses a hot kiss into your flesh.
Kissing and nibbling, he slowly moves downwards, first your hips, then your mound of Venus. You bend your legs and automatically spread them for him, your breathing is now intermittent, you can no longer think for lust and desire.
Joakim positions himself between your thighs, places his large hands under your buttocks and looks at you, asking for permission.
"Please!" you gasp "Please lick me!"
His tongue runs over your folds, skillfully parting them to explore your clit.
You reach into his hair, pull his head closer, he closes his lips around your clit, sucks gently, uses his teeth carefully.
You can't hold on any longer and moan out loud with pleasure.
"Go on!"
His tongue is now exploring the entrance to your cunt, he thrusts into it with a tapered tongue, almost driving you mad.
The change in his actions quickly brings you to your climax, as you realize that you are cumming, you pull a little harder on his hair, your thighs and stomach tremble in ecstasy as you give yourself over to your orgasm, moaning loudly. Your thighs close, you try not to pinch him between them, but you barely succeed, your feelings are so strong.
As your orgasm subsides, you pull him away from your abdomen, upwards.
You kiss him hungrily, tasting yourself, you lick his lips, taking in your taste, only to thrust your pointed tongue into his mouth a little later, which makes him flinch in surprise, but he willingly puts up with it.
As you let yourself fall backwards, catching your breath, he moves with you. He continues to hold you in his embrace, unable to let you go.
"Mina, I want to feel you around me!" he moans into your ear.
His cock is so hard, you can feel it against your thigh.
"Mina" he begs
"Come" is all you say.
"Do you have a condom?"
"No, but I can't get pregnant right now, plus I don't have any STDs. Do you?"
"No, I'm clean, I got tested after my last uhm... well short affair" he explains, shrugging his shoulders.
"May I? Mina? Please, let me feel you, I can't take it anymore, please!"
"Take me!"
Joakim releases his held breath, spreads your legs and supports his cock with one hand so that he can thrust into you.
You feel how he slowly thrusts into you, how your vagina adapts to his thickness and length, an incredible feeling.
When he is completely inside you, he pauses briefly, takes your left leg on his shoulder, pulls back, watches you closely, observes your facial expressions.
As he thrusts again, you cry out.
Joakim thrusts regularly, you match his movements, a harmonious dance, as if it had never been otherwise, as if you were made for each other.
You notice that his movements become unrhythmic, sweat drips from his forehead onto your chest, his eyes narrow, his breathing becomes more wheezing.
You grab his buttocks and pinch his flesh, making him groan.
You increase the tempo and feel another orgasm approaching.
"I can't take any more, are you ready to cum?"
"Yes!" you moan, as another orgasm rips through your body, you almost lose your senses, the feeling is so intense, you cry out ecstatically, clutch at his shoulders, pull him against you.
"Mina, fuck, I can't take any more, can I cum inside you?"
You pull him even harder against you, clinging to him as if your life depended on it.
"Yes"
That's enough to get him over the threshold, moaning as he thrusts uncontrollably into you, you feel his semen shoot into your cunt. He throws his head back, his mouth open in a stifled scream.
Panting, he collapses on top of you, you wrap your legs and arms around him, unwilling to let him pull out of you.
You feel his member slowly slacken inside you, his breath still panting in the crook of your neck, his long hair covering your faces.
His body covers you completely and you enjoy the heaviness.
Then he stirs, pushes himself up.
"Stay!"
"I'm going to smother you!"
"No, stay, just one more moment!"
He carefully lies back down again, not without resting his forearms on the bed so that you don't take his full weight.
He looks you in the eye and kisses you tenderly.
"Min Mina, mitt Hjärta, min Käraste, mitt Liv!" he breathes happily.
His gentle words bring tears to your eyes.
You feel safe, protected, loved.
Endorphins rush through your veins, making you float.
"Min älskade Svensk!" you kiss him on the cheek.
"Yours, with every fiber of my body, if you want!" swallows Joakim, still trembling.
"Mine!"
Joakim shudders and buries his face in your hair.
You lie entwined in the darkness.
You must have fallen asleep for a moment because when you wake up, his head is lying on your upper body, his arms wrapped around you, one leg between yours,
You carefully release his embrace, place his head on the pillow next to you and pull one of your legs out from under him.
You roll out of bed to disappear into the bathroom to clean yourself up, his mess has run down your legs and has already partially dried.
So as not to disturb him, you silently close the door, pull your hair into a bun and quickly get into the shower.
Just as you're about to soap up, the door opens.
You smile at him, "I didn't want to wake you!"
"Hmm, a shower wouldn't do me any harm either!" and with these words, he joins you in the shower.
"Shall I help you mitt Hjärta?"
"You can soap my back!"
"Your wish is my command!"
He carefully begins to spread the shower gel over your back and you sigh with relief.
"I think there's not enough shower gel in the front either, I should change that!" he teases you.
"You should!" you grin.
As he cuddles up to you from behind to soap your chest and stomach, you feel his hard cock against your bottom.
You turn to him, kiss him and run your hands over his chest. You lean forward and take a nipple between your lips, sucking on it, making him groan.
You intensify the pressure and play with the other one with your hand.
Joakim closes his eyes and his arms embrace you.
Your other hand automatically moves to his hard cock, you grasp it carefully, moving your hand slowly up and down.
You take your other hand and run your thumb over his slit, from which the first drops of precum are already leaking,
You spread it over his glans.
Joakim trembles and has to support himself against the wall with one hand.
You pick up the pace and don't take your eyes off him, watching every movement on his face.
You notice how you're getting wet just from the sight of him.
His eyes darken. With just one movement, he grabs you by the hips and lifts you up.
You feel his cock against your cunt, then he slowly lets you slide down, you moan indignantly, clinging to him with your arms and legs.
His movements are slow at first, the hot water makes it difficult for you to breathe.
You are both panting. He thrusts into you faster and faster.
His fingers claw into your buttocks, then playfully run up and down your crack,
This feeling drives you crazy, your panting and moaning gets louder and louder, you realize that you are about to cum.
"Joakim, I, I...." you gasp
"Cum for me Mina" he moans, driving you over the threshold. Your orgasm makes you shiver and shake at the same time, you can hardly take it anymore.
A little later, he is panting harder, his eyes fixed on you, his face contorted in delicious agony. You lick his lips.
Then you feel his cock start to twitch inside you and with one last hard thrust he unloads inside you, moaning. To help him through the aftershock of his orgasm, you slowly circle your pelvis, sighing in comfort.
He then slowly lets you slide down, your lips united in a kiss.
He holds you tightly against him.
Joakim
He lolls comfortably next to you, you are still asleep, snuggled up next to him. He can't take his eyes off you. Watches your every breath, your mouth slightly open.
He can barely control himself to stroke your lips with his thumb, but he doesn't want to wake you.
He turns on his side so that he can look at you better, he smiles, feels the comforting warmth inside him, just from the sight of you.
He still can't believe that you've come into his life.
He thanks fate for it.
Suddenly there's a knock on the door, a muffled voice can be heard.
"Ms. Lamberts? Hello, are you awake?"
You are startled by the noise and Joakim looks at the door, frowning.
"Wha... what?" you ask, confused.
"I don't know what's going on!"
There's another knock, even louder this time, "Ms. Lamberts? Hello?"
Frowning, he watches as you hastily jump out of bed, quickly pull on your panties and a T-shirt and throw on your bathrobe before unlocking the door and peering through a gap at the troublemaker.
"Ms. Lamberts?" asks a man who probably works at the hotel, judging by his clothes and a name tag with the name Ben on it.
"Yes?"
"Ms. Lamberts, I'm sorry to bother you, but I have a gentleman on the phone who is looking for a guest in this hotel!" Ben explains, visibly embarrassed.
"Yes, and what does that have to do with me?"
"This guest was seen with you yesterday, Ms. Lamberts. A Mr. Karlsson. He's not answering my knock, so I wanted to ask if you might know where he is, the gentleman on the phone can't reach him and is visibly upset.....!"
That's all the hotel employee can explain, because suddenly Joakim jumps out of bed as if stung by a tarantula and appears next to you, his nakedness covered only by a towel, and angrily tears open the door.
"Who the hell is looking for me?"
Ben's eyes widen, he backs away and starts stuttering, "Um. Um, I.....!" handing the phone towards Joakim.
Joakim sees out of the corner of his eye how you bite your lip, barely able to suppress a laugh.
Growling, he takes the phone.
"A Mr. Sebastian," Ben presses out.
Joakim's eyes narrow.
"I'll kill you when I get back to LA!" he hisses into the phone and turns away into the room.
You and the unlucky one stare after him.
Quietly, so as not to attract Joakim's attention again, Ben whispers to you, "Um, the phone, I'd need it back."
"I'll give it to you in a minute, hold on!" you promise, walking after the angry Swede.
"You'd better explain to me why your cell phone is off, you're unreachable for hours and then suddenly a picture of you pops up on social media, a private picture, a very private picture! It's not like you, absolutely not. You haven't posted anything private for years! The damn picture went viral, by the way! On all platforms, fans are beside themselves. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?" Noah yells into the phone.
Joakim is taken aback, then runs his other hand over his face, forgetting that he is completely naked.
"How viral?" he asks quietly.
"Viral like it couldn't get any better, what do you think happens when you post something like that? I can't understand you, why did you do that?" Noah is stunned, "Also, why did you turn off your cell phone?"
Joakim reaches for it and sees that he forgot to charge it.
"Battery flat, I didn't mean to!"
"Aha.... Since when do you forget to charge your cell phone?" Noah keeps pushing, you can clearly hear the anger in his voice.
Joakim notices that you are standing next to him with a questioning face. You whisper quietly, "The hotel employee needs his cell phone back!"
"Noah, the man you sicced on me needs his phone back," he says, "I'll call you right back!" And without waiting for an answer, he ends the call and hands you the phone.
You look into each other's eyes and he shakes his head regretfully, wanting to turn to face you completely.
"Joakim, you're not wearing anything!" you hiss at him quickly.
"Oh God, that too," he says annoyed, reaching for his boxer shorts and quickly slipping them on.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees you dart to the door and hand the phone back to the man, then close the door.
"What now?" you ask him uncertainly.
"I'm going to call that fucking asshole back and explain to him that he's not my babysitter!" snorts Joakim.
"I mean, do you have to go back to LA?"
He can see how hard this question is for you.
He quickly goes to you, takes your head in his hands and kisses you.
"No mitt Hjärta, I'm staying here, I don't want to miss a second of you being here!"
Relieved, you hug him.
"What about the photo?" you want to know.
"Seems to have gone viral, fans are running amok according to Noah, whatever that means!" he growls.
He sees you turn white as a sheet and groan.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that, I wanted....." he starts, "I just wanted to make things clear. To show the world that you belong to me, I didn't think that...." he breaks off, runs his hands over his face, brushes his hair back and then looks at you.
The sight of you makes him nauseous, you're still pale, chewing nervously on your lower lip, fiddling with your hand on your bathrobe.
"Mina.... Please, I... should I delete the photo?" his voice breaks.
"No, it's probably too late for that now!" you reply.
"Do you regret it?" he asks quietly.
You slowly snap out of your state of shock, "No, I regret nothing, absolutely nothing! Not a single second, not a single decision!"
"I didn't ask you if it was okay.... To post the photo!"
"I know, but if you had asked me, I would have said yes!"
"Would you really have?"
You smile at him, "It's all or nothing!"
"Oh Mina" Joakim pulls you into his arms.
"Älskling, you have to call Noah back, don't let him call the police on us!" you joke.
"I'm going to kill him!" he growls again!
With his cell phone on the charging cable, he calls Noah back, still angry, who picks up immediately.
"Finally," he hisses, "I thought you'd get back to me in a minute!"
"Battery flat, did you forget? I needed my charging cable first!"
"So you spent the night with her?"
"Yeah man, I did, but I don't know that I'm accountable to you!"
Both's tone is still aggressive.
"I was worried, it's not like you at all!" growls Noah.
"Then you don't know me as well as you think you do!" Joakim counters.
Both remain silent.
"Jolly, man, honestly, I really thought something was wrong. You didn't respond to my messages or Jesse's, you didn't answer my calls! Then Michael comes along with your post on Instagram.... What was I supposed to think? Account hacked? The picture was shared umpteen times, on X, Reddit, TikTok,... are you even aware of that? I thought your privacy was important to you? Some fans are trying to find out who the girl is, where it was taken. Jolly, you really started something!"
"FUCK!" groans Joakim, "I didn't realize that..."
"Jolly, one more thing, I've received both an interview request and a booking request for Portland. We are supposed to perform together with Asking Alexandria and The Word Alive. Sleeping With Sirens canceled at short notice, Kellin has caught Covid and is currently without a voice. The gig would be on the 10th, so in three days! I'm counting on the guys, Nicholas and Nick are already on their way!"
"Uhm..." Joakim is taken by surprise, he wasn't expecting this.
"Jolly, do you understand? Please be in Portland, McMenamins Crystal Ballroom at 3 pm on the dot. First the interview, then soundcheck, then the gig!" Noah explains again seriously.
"Yeah, I....."
"JOLLY" Noah gets annoyed "Damn now tell me you got that and your ass is at the venue on the 10th!"
"Yes, Noah, I got it and of course I'll be there, get me a crew pass for Mina so she has access to everything!" Joakim hisses back.
"You want WHAT? Jolly, Matt will kill you if you think your bunny needs a crew pass!!! VIP for all I care, but that's it!"
"Crew pass, you know security is extremely tight at gigs like this. I don't want Mina standing around on her own somewhere, not getting through to me, you know how it goes!" barks Joakim.
"Then you sort it out with Matt!"
"No, Noah, you sort it out in advance, otherwise you can forget the interview!"
Noah gasps audibly.
"Jolly.... What has that girl done to you? I thought the band was the most important thing in your life too? And now?"
"The band is important to me, extremely important, I gave up everything for her, for you, you know that very well! I put everything on the back burner. Worked hard for our success! But now with Mina, Noah, I don't want to lose this, it's a second chance for me to be happy! I'm not prepared to give up on this, on her. Don't force me to make a choice!" Joakim explains in a calm voice.
"I would never force you to make a choice!" Noah is shocked.
"Well, then please Noah, get me the crew pass!"
"I'll take care of it! But Jolly, please, no more pictures, will you? That would only add fuel to the fire!"
"No more pictures, I wasn't going to anyway!"
"Fine, but Jolly, do you want to go all the way with her? You hardly know her, you don't know anything about her. Who knows if there aren't any problems? I don't want you to get hurt. I saw you after Silja. How long it took you!" Noah is seriously worried.
"I'm serious about her and Noah, I know she's the one! It feels right, real!"
"I hope your feelings aren't deceiving you, honest man!"
"I'll see you in three days, then you'll get to know her and maybe you'll understand. Give her a chance, she's incredible!"
Noah sighs "In three days, and of course I'll give her a chance, especially because she's so important to you!"
"Thanks Noah, I really mean that!"
When he ends the call, he notices that you are not in the room. Your bathrobe is on the armchair, your bra, jeans and shoes, which were on the floor earlier, are gone. Just like your bag.
"WTF" he exclaims.
He hastily opens the bathroom door, empty.
Cursing, he puts on his clothes, steps out into the hotel corridor and looks left and right. You are nowhere to be seen.
This can't be true, where are you?
Joakim hurries to the stairs, then storms into the reception hall. His gaze wanders to every corner.
It's only the hotel employee from earlier at reception. He looks startled when he recognizes Joakim and points with his finger to the exit.
Joakim runs outside, at first he can't see anything in the bright sun, he shields his eyes from the glaring light and continues to search for you. Nothing.
A dull feeling spreads through his stomach. Where are you? Why did you leave? Because of the phone call? Because of Noah's reaction? Or because of the Instagram post?
Damn, did he push everything too hard?
He starts walking around the hotel towards the hotel garden, a park-like area with old trees, pavilions, hanging swings, flower beds and a small pond.
He finally spots you sitting on a bench under a tree by the pond.
He hurries over to you.
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Text
A follow-up to this
"That cannot possibly be him."
Ella takes a breath as she and Lane step into the little coffee shop near her apartment. It's actually really cool; it feels like stepping back into the 1930's. It's decor is deeply retro.
But Lane isn't paying much attention to the art deco style. Her eyes are trained on the boy sitting at the back of the shop with overgrown hair and a bushy beard.
"I did mention he burnt out really fast in California, right?" Ella offers.
"You did, but I didn't realize the burnout included looking like a mountain man," Lane hisses. She sighs. "He's really that bad?"
"He's not great," Ella responds. "Look, I know you guys left things on weird terms, but give him a chance. As a guitarist. And...maybe as a friend?"
Lane steels herself, standing a little taller and nodding. "Okay. Friend. Guitarist. Guitarist. Friend. That's a better order."
Ella nods as well and leads her back to the table, where Dave is nursing a large coffee. He looks up, and his eyes widen, bringing him quickly and clumsily to his feet.
"Lane."
"Dave," she responds, crossing her arms.
"Hi."
"Hi."
"Great start," Ella grins. "Lane, what's your coffee order?"
"Oh," she says, blinking. "I uh...I usually just have what Luke makes."
"Latte?" Ella offers. "They're really good here."
Lane thinks about that for a moment. About how angry her mother would be about her drinking all that caffeine and sugar.
"A latte sounds great. Vanilla?"
Ella smiles. "I'm on it." She turns to another table and waves for the young man sitting there, who has his head behind a book. He can only be Jess. "Come get coffee with me."
"I drank mine," he responds without setting the book down.
"Keep me company and maybe I'll give you a handjob later," Ella tells him.
The book lowers slowly. "It's not a terrible offer," he responds as he gets to his feet.
"I'm aware."
Lane watches them go before turning back to Dave. They both sit slowly.
"That's weird," she comments.
"So is everything these days," Dave mutters sullenly.
"So...I wish I'd known you were back on the east coast," Lane tells him.
"Why?" Dave asks. "I broke up with you."
"Well, yeah, but..." she shrugs. "I still cared. I would have tried to help."
He watches her for a long, quiet moment. "You really would have, wouldn't you?"
"Why wouldn't I?" Lane asks.
"Because I broke up with you," he repeats. "Over the phone. Like an ass."
"I dated Zach," she comments. "I now have a new, higher bar for assery."
Dave wrinkles his nose. "Zach?"
"Yep. Big mistake."
"I'm sorry," he offers. "That it didn't turn out how you hoped."
"Well, I've learned my lesson," Lane says. "About dating guitar players."
"Yeah, I...I guess you have," Dave nods sadly. "I'm really sorry I was one of those lessons."
Lane gives him a gentle smile. It's a nice apology, to be honest. More than she expected. "I appreciate that."
"So. Ella wants us both to be in her band," he says. "Do you uh...do you think we could do that? You know. Be exes and bandmates?"
"On one condition," she says.
Dave lifts an eyebrow.
"For the love of god, shave," Lane orders.
He laughs; really laughs. He's not sure when the last time he did that was. "You have a deal, Miss Kim."
She smiles. "Then, Mr. Rygalski. I guess we're bandmates."
"Oh, yay, you're smiling and laughing!" Ella cries as she rushes back over with Jess and everyone's coffees. "Does that mean we're a go?"
Lane nods. "We're a go."
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countrymusiclover · 9 months
Text
44 - Love is the most powerful magic of all
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His Golden Princess
Thank you all for reading ❤️ This is the end of Astrid and Rumple's story
@fanficismydrug @misskitty1912-blog @icefrye19 @lover-of-books-and-tea
Shooting awake up in the bed holding my stomach with my hands tightly. Frantically looking around I gasped. Fumbling over to my nightstand I dialed the first phone number I could think of. “Em, ah! I need your help. The baby…”
“Ast, what’s wrong?” Even though she wasn’t happy I used the sword to save her life and made her a Dark One she still cared about me.
It had been a few months since I had told her and Rumple the truth. Throwing my head back against the pillows I gripped the phone in my hand. “I think the baby’s coming. I….ohhh. I need Rumple.”
“I’ll come get you.” She said quickly.
Biting my lip I drew blood feeling contractions. My heart was beating faster. “Emma, there’s no need. I can just magic there….ah what the hell?” Looking down to my arm I gasped seeing some dark veins rising up through my veins.
“Astrid, tell me. What’s going on!” My sister declared through the phone hearing the panic in my voice. We could always tell the difference in the other person's voice when we were terrified. Before she gave birth to Henry I visited her in jail and could see she was horrified.
Tossing the covers aside I stumbled out of the bed. Standing on my feet I winced holding a hand over my heart feeling it burning in pain. "Emma, I need Rumple. Ohhh! Call - call Ella…call Ashley. Whoever she's going by. Cinderella!"
"Okay I'm calling her right now." Emma hung up where I stumbled down the stairs in my sleep clothes trying to not panic. Leaning against the wall I knew that Ashly or Ella would be there for me just like my sister.
Walking into Ashly’s hospital room Emma said I should be the one to tell her we convince Gold to let her keep her child. Shutting the door behind me I smiled seeing her holding her daughter. “Hey, how’s she doing. What’s her name?”
“Alexandra. Sean came to see her.” Her smile dropped thinking back to Gold and their deal. “Will he be taking her from me now?”
Sitting down on the edge of her bed I placed a hand on her leg. “Nope. Emma and I got him to let you keep her. My sister will owe him a favor but it doesn’t matter as long as you’re happy.”
“Thank you, thank you both so much.” She began crying, bouncing her baby girl in her arms.
Sending her a grin I tilted my head sensing she had more to say. “What is it, Ashly?”
“I noticed Emma, your sister said she had a kid. But you don’t. I just thought that if you ever have children I’ll be there for you.” The blonde grinned and we would later learn she was Cinderella. “You and Emma gave me a chance to raise my child. And that is something I will never forget.”
Sniffing through tears I didn’t expect that from the single mother. “Awe thank you, Ashly. I will remember that. You have my word.”
The blonde princess pulled up outside my house and her husband Thomas came inside seeing that I was holding my stomach. Throwing my head back I winced sharply. “Sean!”
“Did someone call a prince to the rescue? Come on, we'll get you to the hospital.” He wrapped his arms around my waist lifting me up bridal style carrying me out to his truck.
Ashly was in the front passenger seat holding her daughter in her lap. But she reached behind the seat taking my hand in hers. “It’s going to be okay. Emma said she is going to get Rumple.”
“Okay…” I nodded, biting my lip, shutting my eyes as we flee to the hospital which thankfully wasn’t far in the small formerly cursed town. Once we were there her prince came back with a wheelchair and the nurse got a room ready.
Laying in the bed I gasped seeing the dark veins making their way through my whole arm. I didn't know why it was happening but it had to be the reason I collapsed and saw my daughter in a future vision. “Ah Mrs. Gold. I am praying that this pregnancy I perform is actually normal this time.” Dr. Whale came into the room with a set of nurses.
“You and I both…urgh!” I bared my teeth down before the lights in the room flickered off and on like crazy. I had a blood pressure cuff on tracing my vitals that started sounding off like crazy.
Whale came over reading the level my heart was going. “Woah, that isn’t good. Your heart rate is way too low.”
“It probably has something to do with these.” Holding my forearm upwards he caught sight of the dark veins. I coughed some blood on my shirt when the door burst open and I saw my sister and husband. “Emma - Rumple!”
My husband rushed over to my bedside as quickly as he could with the limp and cane. He takes my hand in tracing his thumb over the veins that were growing my palms now. “Astrid, I’m sorry. There shouldn’t be this much stress on the baby. But don’t worry I’ll fix it.”
“Rumple ... .no you take the power back.” I gasped through tears seeing him draw the Dark One dagger from inside his suit jacket.
He shook his head clutching the dagger handle tightly in his hands. He began crying heavily where I could see his brown eyes welling with tears. “I can’t let the darkness kill you and our daughter. You are too important to me, lass. You are my heart and soul. If you die then I won’t have my happy ending. You have changed me to be a better man and know love when I didn’t think I deserved it. So let me take the power back please.”
“But if you take it back it will kill you, Rumple. That’s the whole reason why I took it from you….I don’t want to lose the man I love.” I sobbed heavily through tears clutching the bedsheets in my fingers. “Please don’t leave me, Rumple. I need you….you are my life!”
He placed the dagger in my right wrapping his hand around mine where he winced shaking through the pain feeling how stronger the darkness had become in my bloodstream. “Then we will split the power between us. Together we share a heart. So we can share the power too.”
“How…I thought only one person could be the Dark One.” I croaked, squeezing his hand in mine beginning to feel more scared than before.
Emma stepped forward taking the dagger in her hands raising it up to the two of us all the while Dr. Whale was jumping standing there watching. “I found a way to control my light magic over the darkness that is keeping me alive. I know what to do. You have to each have light and dark magic inside of you.” She focused sternly on us before the dagger glows brightly and we both gasped.
Shifting my gaze to Rumple I saw he was watching me too. Suddenly the dark magic came outside of me and split into two separate strands. The magic shot back into our hearts and the same thing happened with my golden light magic. “That should work….oh my gosh.” My sister sighed with a smile.
“It worked, Rumple.” Leaning my head against his chest I sighed in relief intertwining my hand with his gently. His brown eyes watched the darkness veins disappear from my arms a few seconds after.
Dr. Whale looked at my screen showing the baby getting my legs up and open to push. “Now that your heart is good we need to get this baby out for ya.”
Rumple moved around to the side of the bed so I could hold onto his hand. The contractions started coming closer together when I gave my first few pushes. My heart started banging against my chest and I already felt tired. "It's starting to come out, Astrid. Just a few more big pushes." Dr. Whale said back.
Rumple winced sharply when I squeezed his hand even tighter. My freehand was turning white while I gripped the handle of the dagger. Sweat was sticking to my forehead with the white hair falling over my shoulders appearing to be a mess. "I can't do this, Rumple…I can’t!"
"Yes you can. Astrid. I've seen you overcome things that have been much harder than this. So I know you can do this." He replied, squeezing my hand in his even though I had nearly broken his hand at this point.
Nodding my head slowly I bared my teeth doing one final push that took the last of my energy that I had left. An infant's cry filled the room where I threw my head back onto the pillows. Gulping a lump down my throat I slowly controlled my breathing while the nurse wrapped the baby in a blanket handing them to me once I had sat up again. "Congratulations, you have a baby girl. Have you thought of a name?"
“No….ah what the hell!” I gasped, feeling more contractions breaking through my body.
Emma whipped her head around in panic. “Whale, what is happening to my sister?”
“It’s okay. Uh….she has another baby coming.” He dropped down in his rolling chair frantically getting prepared again telling me to push again. “You have to start pushing again, Mrs. Gold.”
Sucking in a breath Rumple squeezed my hand tightly knowing that I was beginning to panic rapidly. He pushed hair out of my face when I started pushing as much as I could. “Ahhh!”
“There it is. Congratulations again you two. You have a baby boy now too.” Dr. Whale held up the baby in his arms, handing it to the other nurse.
The nurses handed the girl to me and the baby boy to Rumple. He sent me a teary grin and I chuckled, not expecting that we would have two kids at once. “Rumple, I know the name for the daughter. Marigold Ella Stilskin. But you can name the boy.”
“Gideon Baefire Stilskin.” He declares leaning forward kissing me gently. Leaning into the kiss I smiled when he whispered back. “I love you, Astrid. I always will. You are my golden princess.”
Breaking the kiss we both stared down at the infants in our arms. No matter what we had faced, these little joys were all worth it. “I love you too, Rumple. You are my dark prince.” I would never forget that Henry bringing us here to break a curse changed everything for the better.
Comments really appreciated ❤️
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zoyalannister · 9 months
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Long rant, aka:
The criminal treatment of Cecily Lightwood (née Herondale) in TLH
Premise: Cecily is my favourite character from TID, so I won't be impartial. At all.
Cecily is a wonderful character, but even since TID her traumas were always glassed over. I remind you that, in like a week, she lost all her family: Ella died, Will left to London, her father became an alcoholic gambler (he will eventually lose the house) and her mother fell into depression. It was never shown how much all this affected her, especially if you think that in 1800s people didn’t know about mental health, so Cecily would find herself with a mother who doesn’t talk to her like she used to and she wouldn’t even know why st the age of ten.
We barely know how she spent the next five years, most of the things I assume are either my headcanons or @livia-dovehallow reflections.
Five years later, she arrives in the Institute and finds out she loves fighting and she's also very good at it. She gives the final blow to Benedict Lightwood’s worm, but Tatiana will always blame Will and Jem. This would have been fine if it was just Tatiana being overly sexist and not accepting that a woman killed her father, but all the narrative goes on ignoring the fact that Cecily killed Benedict.
At the end of TID, Cecily tells Gabriel that she wants to be more than just a mother and a wife, and indeed at the age of 40 she is... just a stay-at-home mom when her husband, and moat importantly, her children risk their life.
I think this just happened because CC wants to give space to the new gang, ignoring their parents, but it doesn’t make any sense to me.
Firstly, Cecily never wanted to be just a mother and a wife. She always wanted to be a fighter, so it's stupif she just stopped. But the most stupid thing ever is Cecily not fighting but being perfectly okay into sending Anna and Christopher risking their lives.
A person like Cecily, who lost all her family in a short time, would never stop fighting, on the contrary, she would fight even hardher to defend the family she created with Gabriel. She would never let her children fight alone when she’s home/at the Institute, she would fight alongside them.
But if Cecily stayed IC we wouldn’t have had TLH because she would have sorted out the plot in no time, probably insisting on having Tatiana killed the same moment they all found out she was behind Barbara's death.
So why give Cecily the space she deserves when you can enjoy 2100 pages of boredom, miscommunication, other boredom and insults to your intellect?
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clareguilty · 1 year
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"You've never told me your real name," the prince said aloud at the exact moment the realization came to him.
It caught the attention of his bride-to-be, who had been gazing out at the royal gardens and secretly plotting what she would like to change once she became queen. She always had a fondness for hydrangeas, and they seemed so much friendlier and more inviting than the stoically pruned rosebushes that lined every row.
His words sank in a half second too late -- after she had already replied with a baffled "What?"
"Your name, Darling. You've never told me it. Don't you think that is something important for a husband to know?"
And indeed it hadn't come up in the near two weeks since they two found love at first sight. It had felt a little ridiculous, feeling so reluctant to be parted from a stranger after just three nights, but every day that passed since he found her again only deepened the fondness and understanding that had first bloomed in these very same gardens.
He laughed derisively, "I can hardly call you 'Cinder-Ella' when you help rule this kingdom at my side."
His beloved turned once more to the gardens, if only to hide the tears welling in her eyes and avoid the earnest expression of the Prince. She looked every bit the queen she had accepted to be when he begged for her hand in marriage, straight back, raised chin, elegant and strong. At first, he had worried about marrying a woman who had been reduced to a scullery maid for most of her life, but the monsters who took her name had never managed to beat the grace and strength from her, and with every passing day a little more of her beauty and wit revealed itself. She would be just fine in the cutthroat arena of the royal court.
"My love," he tried again, "We are picking out bedding for our marital suite -- don't you think I should have something to call you by?"
"And what's wrong with Cinderella?" She asked, sharp and defensive. "That is all I have been for many years, and I do not feel very much like the girl I was before." She knew she could never go back to that innocent and smiling child with a beautiful name bestowed on her by a woman she never had the chance to know. If anything, her true name had died along with her mother, and she felt she had no claim to it anymore.
The prince held no fury for his love, but his blood boiled at the thought of those wretched women who had enslaved her and hidden her away. He fought to keep the anger out of his voice, as he didn't want to upset her further.
"Cinderella isn't a name, it's a humiliating mockery that your wicked family used to hurt you." He groaned in frustration. "I can't believe you want to invite them to the wedding!"
She stopped him with a glare that he both feared and adored. "You promised you would be kind to them."
"I will! I will. I just... They're absolutely insufferable! I can't believe they think that you will just forgive them for everything now that you're engaged to a prince! And now they practically worship the ground you walk on with the hopes of groveling their way into my court." He only paused a moment before starting right back in again. "They were horrible to you! And I hate that they called you something so cruel for so long -- that you slept among the mice and the ashes. What kind of father lets-"
At those words, she interrupted low and fast before he could finish, "Do not dare speak ill of my father. He is trapped by that woman just as I was."
The prince sat in shock. How could she make excuses for the man? "He sat by for years while you were treated like dirt! His cowardice made a slave of his only daughter. How can I have respect for a man like that? Do not tell me that he calls you Cinderella too?"
The question was like the twist of a knife, and she recoiled as the prince forced her to face a truth she had tried to avoid for years.
He immediately felt regret for the tears that spilled over her cheeks and first reached for her before drawing back as she flinched away from his outstretched hand. "I'm sorry, my love," he whispered. He did not know what to offer her in apology and stumbled over his words. "I will never speak of them again if you would like."
She took his hand from his lap and unfurled his white-knuckled fist to lace her fingers with his own. "They're all I have," she struggled to keep her voice steady. "As terrible as they are, I can't just leave them behind."
He squeezed her calloused palm. "You'll be able to one day -- if you want. Father adores you, and Mother has been begging to help you pick out your gown. You will have more friends than you know what to do with in the palace."
"Don't remind me of the gown," she groaned. "I don't think I can look at a slipper anymore without feeling ill."
"I'll make her promise not to mention it," the prince stifled a chuckle. "You can walk down the aisle barefoot for all I care."
She finally gave him the smile he was so desperate to see, deciding to check with the current queen before she had all of the rose bushes ripped up. It would be important to honor the family that had accepted her as one of their own.
"Maybe one day I'll be able to forget about them." She smirked, "But I still have to rub it in that I'm the one getting a royal wedding."
The prince laughed so loudly it reverberated off of the stone walls of the garden. "Perhaps we should give them front row seats after all! If only so that I can see their horrified faces as I kiss my barefoot bride at the altar."
They fell silent for a long moment, each seeking the other's touch for comfort.
"Was this our first fight?" She asked quietly. "Have we already resorted to bickering?"
"It can be if you like," he grinned, "or you can save it for a real shouting match when it comes time to pick table settings for the banquet."
She rolled her eyes and nudged an elbow into his side. "I couldn't give a damn about table settings."
"You'll change your mind when you see the option Mother wants," he teased. She felt him shift as he was struck with yet another thought and turned to watch as he carefully selected his words.
"What if... You chose a new name? One that you've decided for yourself?" He wasn't sure if it was the right suggestion, but he relaxed when she pursed her lips in thought and seemed to genuinely consider it.
"What if I choose something absolutely atrocious just so you would never call me it?"
He kissed her knuckles. "I would adore any name you chose simply because it belonged to you, and it would be printed on the invitations tomorrow so everyone in the kingdom could know what to call my bride."
"Even if I stayed Cinderella?"
"Even if you stayed Cinderella."
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artist-assassin · 4 months
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ok i need to know more about ellaria STAT. and your thoughts on rosy + the rosymance !!
RRRRR OK OK but ive only played the public demo so far i havent paid for the patreon/closed demo yet, so i have very little information about the Rosymance in general. info dump and stats below
Ellaria is the humorous / cheerful kinda Button, about 5'5", and she calls her brother Nick-Nack in the game but I imagine she will call him any random number of names off the top of her head (based off of when I played Fallout 4 and I would often call Nick any random nickname like Nicki Minaj, Nickle Pickle, Nickolodeon, Nickaroni and Cheese, etc lol). She has some insecurities because she compares herself to her brother a lot, but she tries to tough it out and beat up her bad thoughts bc she's an unstoppable optimist!!! Stubborn to a fault she refuses to back down once she sets her mind to something. Is a very nice person but gets very socially awkward in large groups, and sometimes lashes out when she gets frustrated by how fragile people treat her (the first thing that made her like Instructor Kim was that he didnt beat around the bush abt her zero but didnt treat her like a kid either!! shes like damn finally some respect around here)
Loves Nick so much (i got like a 160% relationship with him in the open demo lol) looks up to him like her personal hero + mentor. Loves her dad even though it's a little bit strained, has not seen or spoken to her mother in 4 or 5 years after The Incident(tm). but she misses her mom a lot she, she's half scared of her mom hurting her and half scared she will hurt her mom.
I chose the pre-prepared name Ella when I first started playing bc I didn't know what the game was about so I wasn't prepared to like.. make an OC for it until I decided I liked it enough lol. But I compromised by just naming her Ellaria and Ella is her nickname. Here are her stats by whatever chapter is the last one in the open demo (8 i think?)
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I LOVE AMBROSE KIM... i played as bisexual in my first go as Ella so i had no idea the genders for some charas changed until I checked the Ambrose Kim tag on tumblr lol. but im way more into rosy as a man than as a woman... Mr Kim u can instruct me any day,..
Like I said tho I don't know a lot about the Rosy romance because I only played the open demo, and I know the author says his romance takes the longest to flower because of the whole teacher/student aspect so he's actively trying to NOT fall for button.. well too bad bitch I'm gonna be so respectable and hot he's gonna have no choice.
anyway im gonna get the patreon this week (friday probably) so i can update u on how i feel soon jhgjhlks i also love all of the characters ngl. i would romance all of them in separate playthroughs.
and u didnt ask but ill mention Kali also, my 2nd Wiseman. shes NUTS. i made her to be the exact opposite of my first humorous, cheerful, ready-to-take-on-the-world girl Ella - so Kali is grim and not nice at all and technically still ready to take on the world but more in a "the whole world is my enemy" kind of way instead of the "i wont let anything stop me" ella way. She's VERY resentful about her zero and is one bad look from a ment away from strangling someone
sorry for the long ramble jhagdwj youre the first person who is talking to me about this game that has become my newest obsession (and u were the one who got me into it so UR responsible for this mess) and im happy to share it w someone :3c
pls feel free to tag me in any mind blind stuff u post, whether fanart or oc art or just rambles n stuff i dont care ill love it all. thank u
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the-rewatch-rewind · 9 months
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Long fun episode featuring my brother!
Transcript below the break
Hello and welcome back to The Rewatch Rewind! My name is Jane, and this is the podcast where I count down my top 40 most frequently rewatched movies in a 20-year period. Today I will be discussing number 20 on my list: Miramax, Jane Starz Productions, and Blessington Films Productions’ 2004 fantasy comedy Ella Enchanted, directed by Tommy O’Haver, written by Laurie Craig, Karen McCullah, Kirsten Smith, Jennifer Heath, and Michele J. Wolff, based on the book by Gail Carson Levine, and starring Anne Hathaway and Hugh Dancy.
Cursed with the “gift” of obedience in infancy, Ella (Anne Hathaway) becomes increasingly desperate to break free when her father remarries, and her step-mother and step-sisters (played by Joanna Lumley, Lucy Punch, and Jennifer Higham) take advantage of her forced compliance. Finally she runs away to find and confront the fairy who cursed her, and makes several friends along the way, including an elf named Slannen (Aiden McArdle), and, of course, a prince named Charmont (Hugh Dancy).
I didn’t see this movie in theaters, but I did see it the year it came out. I watched it once in 2004, seven times in 2005, once in 2006, once in 2008, once in 2009, once in 2012, once in 2013, twice in 2014, once in 2015, once in 2016, twice in 2019, and once in 2021. The vast majority of those viewings were with my brother Quinn, so I asked him to join me and help explain why we love this movie so much. We had a very long, very fun conversation that I hope you will enjoy.
Hi, Quinn!
Quinn
Hello!
Jane
Welcome to the Rewatch Rewind. 
Quinn 
How exciting to be here! I feel famous. 
Jane 
Yes, you've definitely been mentioned in many previous episodes. 
Quinn 
It's very fun for me as your sibling, having grown up with you and been in the background of a lot of these watches, I'm guessing, to hear some of your takes as as a grown person on on these movies. And just kind of revisiting, you know, it takes me back to a time and place as well hearing you talk about them. So this podcast is personally very fun for me. 
Jane 
Have there been any movies that you hadn’t seen? 
Quinn 
You know none that immediately come to mind. There's definitely movies I didn't watch nearly as much as you did. Like, I think there's a couple movies that I've heard your, your… you explaining on the podcast, your affinity for them is kind of the first time I've heard, like, your insights, and like all the, the nuances that you notice about each of the movies. But no, I'm pretty sure I've been familiar with all of the movies that you've talked about. Like Adam's Rib, like I maybe never watched it all the way from start to finish, but I've certainly seen the “like a sound part” and the the highlight parts of the movie that you noted in the podcast. 
Jane 
Yeah, cause I think Rosemary's told me there's a couple that she was not sure that she'd seen. 
Quinn 
OK, it was news to me that everyone hated Bringing up Baby. I think I probably did at some point know that, and then just like forgot overtime but…
Jane 
Yeah, I feel like the rest of the family would never watch it with us.
Quinn 
Well, no and I didn't… I I completely didn't realize that that I… it always stuck out to me as one of my favorite movies of that time and era, and I don't think that I was ever old enough when I watched it to really question the like logistics of it, or like the premise. So, but I always loved Bringing up Baby. I thought it was funny. And I think that it's funny that people were so irritated with Katharine Hepburn because I think she's hilarious in the whole thing. 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah, so I did remember, like I almost was like, oh, yeah, everyone I know hates this movie, I was like, oh no, Quinn likes this movie! 
Quinn 
Well, I'm glad to get the shout out. I really didn't realize it was a controversial stance that I had. 
Jane 
Yes, well, I know a lot of like old movie fans that I've met online were telling me, like, “Oh yeah, I love Bringing up Baby!” So it's not just us, but... 
Quinn 
Yeah, definitely. You talked about its reputation as being kind of like a standout screwball comedy. I think that definitely makes sense. I think that it doesn't get screwier than Bringing Up Baby.
Jane 
Yeah, it is, it is THE screwball comedy. Yeah, so as far as the movie we're talking about today though, I think…
Quinn 
Made many decades later. 
Jane 
Yes! I think that that's one that we definitely fell in love with together, that like a lot of the movies I've talked about so far are like specific to me watching and then you would kind of watch them with me. But I think with Ella Enchanted, we watched it together and grew to love it together, so that's why I wanted to have you on for this episode. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah, I definitely think that like looking at your list and like thinking about like oh what are some of the reasons why they ended up here? Like Ella Enchanted, I feel responsible for in ways that I might not feel responsible for other movies on this list. 
Jane 
Yes. Well, I think what's important for our listeners to understand is that when you were younger, like you're quite a bit younger than me. And when you were little, you really liked to, like, pick a movie and watch it a bunch, like, really close together. Is that fair? 
Quinn 
Oh yes, I had phase movies for sure. Like it was, I can think of particular movies that I would watch all the time and I could never tell you the reason why I stopped watching any of these movies. But there would be a period of time that I would just get really hot with a certain movie and that would be all I wanted to watch and then… I guess I would just get over it. 
Jane 
And I think that Ella Enchanted is the only one of those that has made it onto my list. 
Quinn 
Yes, I would say that's fair. And I, Ella Enchanted was for sure one of those movies, and I would actually say one of the things I for sure wanted to talk about today was the soundtrack for Ella Enchanted, I would say is has been a pillar of my music appreciation over the years and like that soundtrack is actually very good…
Jane 
It's very good. 
Quinn
…and I think introduced me to a lot of like older songs like classic songs that I otherwise wouldn't have known that I think was important in my developing a music taste as well. 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah. There's definitely a lot of covers of really famous songs. It's kind of weird that they chose to go that direction with, like, this fairy tale story like that they did more like rock songs. But it works really well. It was just kind of an odd choice when you, like, read the book, you don't necessarily think like, oh, this would be perfect to have like a Queen song. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah. And I was actually thinking about, you had mentioned fans of the book Ella Enchanted that the movie is adapted from tend to be pretty disappointed with this adaptation. And I agree that it's a pretty poor representation of the book, and I guess I've sort of reimagined the movie as more just like another like retelling of Cinderella and, and I guess, like kind of with Ella Enchanted flavor to it. Like there's a lot of the plot points that like kind of the core characterizations of some of the characters are borrowed from Ella Enchanted. But yeah, I mean, I think there's so many adaptations of fairy tales out there, and like I think that it's a very fun and ultimately like kind of visionary choice that they went with like sort of this like 70's rock theme for the soundtrack that sort of like didn't really have any other connection to the story, but just those were the songs that they went with. And I do know that like specifically with Somebody to Love, which I think is kind of the key musical moment in the movie that was really sort of driven from like, I guess Tommy O'Haver was working with Anne Hathaway on some kind of like more traditional, like folksy fairy tale song. And it didn't suit her voice as well as Somebody to Love. So I feel like it was also very driven by like who were the people making the movie and what their tastes were, which is, I also think probably why it works because it was driven from an organic place. 
Jane 
Yeah definitely. And I think that casting Anne Hathaway and then like using her, because like, at that point, she was mostly known for Princess Diaries, which I guess she still is known for Princess Diaries, but, like, kind of taking that sort of flavor of princess of, like, I guess it's not really like a modern story, Ella Enchanted, because it's sort of set in this…made-up fairy tale-ish place, but like definitely has, like modern sensibilities that I think that like putting… I mean, Anne Hathaway has also done period work that's been good. I mean, she won an Oscar, but like, I think that taking her like personality and more modern sensibilities and putting it into this fairy tale thing worked really well. And I think that if they had tried too hard, like again, like, recognizing that that song didn't fit her voice and tried too hard to push her in a different direction. I don't think the movie would have worked.
Quinn 
Oh yes, Anne Hathaway is very much allowed to be Anne Hathaway in this movie and it's fantastic. I think one of my biggest takeaways from this movie in watching it relatively recently in preparation for this conversation was just how essential I feel it is in the Anne Hathaway story. Because, I mean, you see her, I think debuting in a lot of people's eyes, I think she was in a movie or two before Princess Diaries. Or was that her debut? 
Jane 
I think it might have been her debut. 
Quinn 
And I feel like you have definitely a star is born moment with Princess Diaries and she really I think emerged as someone to watch and as a a star that could like hold their own with Julie Andrews and and sort of have this kind of fun, relatable charm. Like I do see sort of like the Emma Stone and Jennifer Lawrences that come after really sort of taking something from the Anne Hathaway School of being a young it girl actress. And I feel like it was Ella Enchanted that really I think the singing particularly introduced this new layer to her talent, you know, circle and now all of a sudden, Anne Hathaway can be in musicals and she's very good at singing. And I just think that it was a very important stepping stone to her becoming a superstar. And I mean, she won the Oscar for a musical. So I think you know I can see, you know, maybe she would have ended up in Les Mis regardless of Ella Enchanted, but I do think this movie really put her on the map. And it's funny because I don't think it's a like particularly well regarded movie in any sort of circles, but I have to think that it had some really important impacts on Anne Hathaway's career following. 
Jane 
Oh yeah, definitely. So had you read the book before seeing the movie, do you remember? 
Quinn 
I actually I don't remember, but if I had to guess, I would say I saw the movie first, and I think you knew the book and so were able to like give some context when I would see it early. And then I did eventually read the book and like it. It has been a long time since I've read the book though, so I cannot really recall what is different about the movie in the books now. 
Jane 
Yeah, I haven't read the book in a long time. I had read the book definitely before I saw the movie, and it was kind of like, I feel like the book was different than this. But like the, I mean the basic premise is the same, but it's different to the point that I, like you said, I kind of consider them two different things, and I can definitely see why fans of the book would think that the movie was a bad adaptation, but at the same time it's like, it's fun. They did their own thing with it and…
Quinn 
Well, and Ella Enchanted is an adaptation too, which I think it for me is what makes it work. 
Jane 
Right. 
Quinn 
And like I have been thinking in a lot of like media that I've seen recently with elements of the Cinderella story in it of like, what are some of the things I like about each retelling? And like I I texted you out of the blue when I was watching Into the Wood randomly and I was like, I think the Cinderella in Into the Woods is my favorite all time Cinderella. So like I did also, when I watched it recently was kind of thinking about like what are my favorite interpretations of the Cinderella story like in Ella Enchanted and what are some of the things that I think work better in other retellings? It's a story that is just very familiar at this point. 
Jane 
Yeah, it's been told and retold time and time again, and I I know you haven't listened to the Enchanted episode yet, but we talked about Cinderella quite a bit in that episode, too, because it's sort of like the fairy tale. And I think it's so interesting in Ella Enchanted that they added this layer of her being cursed. And it's not just that she has a really mean stepmother and step sisters. But it's like, literally they could order her not to leave and she would not be able to leave. 
Quinn 
Yeah, the curse is awful. And I do think Cinderella in all tellings of the story is someone who is abused,
Jane 
Right. 
Quinn 
and I think that that is a very important  facet of the story, and I think you and I've talked a lot about how there's a lot of like dismissal of Cinderella as a character in many iterations of just like being this damsel, like this bad representation of, you know, femininity and you know, just waiting around for a man. But I think that the curse really illuminates just some of the cruelty that I think Cinderella in all versions of the story experiences. But it's they almost don't really emphasize the chores, and like the the working and the cinder part of Cinderella, and they even dropped that from her name. It's it's less about the labor that she's expected to do and more just that this curse really defines all aspects of her life and turns even people that are trying to help her against her. And yeah, it's a terrible, terrible curse. And I think that it's a very lighthearted movie, but it's very dark what she has to go through. 
Jane 
Yeah, absolutely. And I think that it also… they do a good job of showing her sort of fighting the curse. And again, like you said, there's this perception that Cinderella is sort of a weaker, more passive character, but she really has always been, you know, very strong in being able to break away from her horrible situation. And I think they show Ella really doing everything she can to fight the curse and be like, OK, I'm gonna do what you told me, but I'm gonna do like, my own version of it. Like I'm gonna try and find loopholes in these orders so that I don't have to actually be under your thumb. And yeah, I I just, I think that's very well done. 
Quinn 
From a narrative perspective, it's a really powerful way to empower the character of of Ella and make her, I think, have people see more of themselves in her too, by giving her something to really fight against and be subversive against. And I think that that, I mean, it drives the plot of the movie. It's it's a good a good narrative tool. 
Jane 
Yeah and then there's the whole thing about that she's trying to fight for the rights of like elves and giants and other types of mystical beings who have been subjugated by the government. And I think that there's a little bit of an element of like sort of a savior complex in some of what she does, but I think that ultimately she feels a kinship with these people that are being forced to do things against their will because she's literally being forced to do things against her will all the time when people tell her to do stuff, she has to do it. And I think that that gives her a lot of empathy for, like giants being forced to do farm labor, and elves being forced to sing and dance. And I think they do a good job of showing that in the story. That like she feels like she kind of understands some of what they're going through and that's part of why she feels so strongly about trying to help them. 
Quinn 
Yeah, yeah, I think that it's also, I would love to see sort of the same premise of this story exist now and kind of retold now that we know a little bit more about how to be maybe a better ally or to sort of be a little bit more inclusive and less performative. Because I do think you know, in watching it recently, there were some things Ella said and did that I was like, ooh I don't know about that as you know, good activism. Like thinking specifically about how, when her and Prince Char returned to Lamia, which is where the palace is, you know where the Prince is there. He clearly has some kind of status and they're with an elf companion, their elf friend Slannen, and like they just he gets thrown out of the the palace and they stand there and don't seem to like, do anything to try to stop it. It's like, OK, well, we need to, like, act upon our convictions. So yeah, there's little things like that. And also like when Slannen the elf is trying to talk to Prince Charmont about working with his uncle to maybe allow elves to have other careers than being performers or entertainers cause he wants to be a lawyer and he's saying, “Well, can you petition your uncle the literal king for me to be a lawyer?” And he's just like, “I can't do that! That would be weird. It simply isn't done!” And so those are the types of things where the movie does let me down a little bit because I want to see, you know, some real advocacy and allyship. But I do think that you make such a good point about Ella feeling a kindred spirit to these marginalized peoples and really having that empathy and speaking up and saying something. I think that that is very clear throughout the movie and that is what allows her to be successful ultimately, is these relationships that she's built that she has built through empathy and through, you know, walking in people's shoes and hearing their stories and listening to them. So I think that there is a really beautiful message of of caring for the marginalized and advocating throughout the movie. 
Jane 
Yeah and I do think that there's they show that Prince Char, at least they show him as very like privileged and ignorant initially and that he, like again, he definitely could do more, but I'm thinking about like the scene when he listens to the giant leader and like, he's actually like, oh, wow, I didn't realize how bad things were. I'm going to try and make things better, and again, I don't know what he actually does, but he does become king, presumably at the end after his uncle dies. So hopefully he does…. 
Quinn 
He does sing Elton John. That we do know. 
Jane 
Yes, so I mean obviously there's only one step between sing Elton John and free the marginalized people, so… 
Quinn 
He's on the right path. 
Jane 
Yeah, yes. So again, yes, you're right, it definitely could do more, but I also think that they have some good points. There's some almost there moments, I think. 
Quinn 
Oh yeah, and in in thinking about the times, like, I think that those some of those interactions and conversations were like stepping stones to, I think more fruitful ways to interact in those spaces and in those conversations, but it definitely, you know I I think that's a very presentist mindset to even look at some of those conversations critically, because you know, at that time those were conversations that were the most tolerant things got. So, you know, it's definitely have to make allowances for differences in in time. And I do have to say, I think talking about Prince Charmont as a character, I think he is one of the better, more developed Prince characters that you get in one of these Ella Enchanted Cinderella retellings, and I think Hugh Dancy really played like, I think, all of the acting in this movie is really phenomenal. I think that's a headline for me is that it's a very well acted movie, even though it's probably objectively pretty bad. 
Jane 
The script left something to be desired, but the actors did the best they could with it. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah, OK, let's just dive into it because I think that there is no better argument for “there are no small parts” than this movie because every single one of the actors in this movie like nails - and I don't mean like this in a casual like - nails their role. Like every performance I can think of, like one of my favorites to just like think about is Minnie Driver and like as Mandy who is like the fairy kind of governess of Ella and like she's not a very powerful fairy, so she's not that helpful in terms of her magical skill abilities, but like, she's kind of an ally to Ella in her abusive home and like, plays a role throughout the story. Very minimal and like the character of Mandy, I think I remember being pretty important in the Ella Enchanted book, and like they really, I think the writers really stripped this character of, like any kind of, like, notable personality. But Minnie Driver was just like, “Nuh-uh! Not my part!” And she just like, finds these like perfect comedic moments, and it's like she has like one line in a scene, and just like is so in character the whole time and is just like hysterical., completely matches like the attitude of just being like a little, like, sassy, and over it. And I'm like, that's just like one of the very bit parts. Like you've got like the the, I don't remember her name, but the actress who plays Olive, who's just like deranged and like all the, like, kleptomaniac stuff. And she's just like, “Ooh hoo hoo!” like, the whole time completely in character. Joanna Lumley is there, like, serving evil stepmother. Like she is not letting a moment go by without just like commanding the scene. Vivica A. Fox like comes in and does her like flashy, sassy little, like unhelpful cutaway scenes that are, like, again, all of these roles are pretty insignificant, don't have a lot of screen time, don't have much to work with, terrible script and like these actresses are just like, “This is the best role I've ever played in my life!” It's so much fun. It's like you talked a couple of podcasts ago about your favorite movies to watch being like ones where the actors are clearly having a good time. And like, I just feel like, you know, Anne Hathaway gives a fantastic performance and is committed and plays all the emotional highs and lows. She has the most terrible lines to say and she just like, gets through it like a professional. Hugh Dancy is like also having a good time, and it's like appropriately, like, kind of like charming and aloof. And like Slannen is memorable. Like he's got that, like, you know, conviction. And he has some very, like, silly, like, physical comedy moments as well. And then you've got like Jim, who's on Downton Abbey? Like playing this like ogre, who like has these dramatic cutaways while he's trying to eat people like just great performances all around.
Jane 
Yeah, I agree. I think that you're right. That is a big part of why I enjoy this movie is that it's very apparent that everybody was just having fun. And you get that, especially with the big dance number at the end, which is just kind of random and like, why are they singing Don't Go Breaking My Heart at a wedding? Like…
Quinn 
Ohh my gosh, it's so. It's fun though.
Jane 
It's just, yes. 
Quinn 
Like I I've never questioned… Like it's a weird song choice, but I'm just, that is one of the most joyful, perfect finales to a movie that I've ever seen, like where everyone gets a little bit of something to do. You like, get that fun, like end credits. Here's everyone's final bow, and it's just like a ton of fun. 
Jane 
Yeah, it's just unfortunate that Lucy Punch. Is that her name? 
Quinn 
Oh yes. 
Jane 
She doesn't get to be in it because- 
Quinn 
Well, and I just realized I didn't mention her performance, but I feel like it deserves its own subsection. So Lucy Punch, who plays Hattie, the step sister of Ella, the mean stepsister, I…. that is my all time favorite interpretation of the evil stepsister character, because Hattie is just like, very impetuous, but she is dangerous and she, like, serves a role in the story that actually, you know, like her ratting out Ella is what leads to some of the highest stakes in the story eventually, s I do feel like so often the step sisters are really just like bit characters that don't really have much to do other than like be mean to Cinderella in like one or two scenes. And I feel like she both took that sort of like superfluous, frivolous quality that the step sisters have and like, did that, but also, like, they did find a way to work her way into the plot. She had a bit of menace and a bit of intelligence that she was able to use to try to achieve her own goals. And then I think has a great, like, humiliating downfall. And this is made all the better by the fact that Lucy Punch is like this was her dream role to play a step sister. And be this character and like she is a step sister in Into the Woods and in something else, I'm pretty sure. 
Jane 
I feel like she's played Cinderella's step sister at least four times. 
Quinn 
Yes. And like that was her dream role and this actress is just like having the best time being this character. Like it totally shows and I think that Hattie is like a standout character and performance throughout the entire thing as well. And it is a shame that she is not in the finale, but it's because of a deleted scene. And you can see the deleted scene if you get the DVD. 
Jane 
Yes, which I think is a good way to transition into why we have seen this movie so many times because yes, it is fun. And yes, we would watch it a bunch probably normally anyway, but the reason that we have watched it quite this many times is because we had the DVD and we discovered how delightful the audio commentary is. And I didn't keep track of how many times I watched it with or without commentary. But I would say that more than half of the times I watched it were with commentary. 
Quinn 
Yes, I mean, I think it became… you could have almost kept track of this movie two different ways, like watching it in its original form and watching it with commentary, because I think you we went to either at different times when we were looking for different things in a viewing experience. 
Jane 
Yeah, but I would, I think that…that even if I counted them separately, the commentary watching would be enough to be in my Top 40. 
Quinn 
You know, I I was gonna say I Jane mentioned this episode. You mentioned it to me. And I kept thinking you were going to schedule it and schedule it. And I'm like, wow, Ella Enchanted really made it far up this list because it's been several weeks now. It's pretty deep in the ranking. 
Jane 
Yeah, it's #20 so it's in the top half. 
Quinn 
Yeah. Top half. I'm stunned. 
Jane 
Yes, but yeah, so I don't remember how many times I'd seen it just normally before we discovered the commentary. But the commentary is just… it just adds a whole other level and like one of the things that you said earlier that made me think of it was when you were talking about Vivica A Fox being fabulous. And like, Anne Hathaway mentions in the commentary the scene when she's tied up to a tree and Lucinda shows up and she's like, oh, I'm going to help rescue you. And she's like, no, I want to be chained to this tree so I don't have to kill Char. And in the commentary, Anne Hathaway says that, like Vivica A Fox was so excited to do that scene. And she, Anne, was kind of like, “I don't know. I don't really like the lines” and Vivica’s like, “Oh, I'm not gonna say the lines. But we're gonna have fun!”
Quinn 
Yes, one of an Ella Enchanted moment that I think about probably most of any other, although there's so many, is like right after she sets her free, Vivica A. Fox, is just standing in this, like, fabulous pose and she's like, “Well, aren't I fabulous?” while Ella is just like, “This is terrible! This is not what I wanted!” It's just like a fabulous moment of just, like, completely not taking in any of your surroundings. You're the main character, the story is you, forget about everybody else, forget whose movie it. It's, it's Vivica A Fox. It's just, it's fabulous. But yes, the commentary which it features, Anne Hathaway and Hugh Dancy. So the two romantic leads of the movie and Tommy O’Haver, who is the director, he's like maybe the one you don't know, but if you don't know him you should. They just narrate the whole movie and it is absolutely hysterical, like the tone that these three have together is great. It's as if they're the best friends. They probably haven't spoken to each other in a decade now, which makes me sad because in my mind they hang out every day and commentate on things. Like they just have great chemistry. You can tell all three of them had a lot of fun making the movie and they're just like having a good time, and you can really you feel like you were there with them, like making this ridiculous movie that really wasn't that good, but damn it, they worked hard. 
Jane 
Yeah and it's like it's exactly what you would want from audio commentary, I think, which is like behind the scenes trivia because they have quite a bit of that. And then just like some like tea, like a little bit, not a lot of tea, but just like sort of like, oh, this didn't work very well or like, I was actually really miserable this day or something like that.
Quinn 
Well, they talk about like, little like spats they had with each other, but it's like, “Oh yeah, we got in a fight about that that day. I felt very this way” like it's it's all like it clearly happened like over a year ago. 
Jane 
Yeah, so there's that. But then just also like. Each one of them has a different thing that they kind of focus on more, which is nice that like they're not just kind of saying the same thing because like Hugh Dancy talks a lot about, like the stunt people. And like he was friends with them. And then Anne Hathaway- This is another thing, too, is like the commentary, like, really shows you how and how Anne Hathaway was like, set up to be super successful in Hollywood because she, like, remembers everybody's name, everybody who worked on this, like even like all the like, minor crew people and she's just like, yeah, this person did a great job and she, like, seems very like gracious. And like she actually cares, but is also very good at networking. And I think that that's exactly what you have to be to be like successful and someone that people like. 
Quinn 
Well, and you really get a sense of Anne Hathaway's work ethic, too. 
Jane 
Oh yeah. 
Quinn 
Which I think very much it comes through in the commentary where you just, like, get a sense of, like, all the things that she's thinking about. You hear a lot of the things that she's insecure about, and just like all of the the dynamics of being the Anne Hathaway of of this movie, being a movie star, being the the center of attention, both like in the internal world of the movie and in the external world of making the movie and in the even more external world of like marketing the movie and being the star.
Jane
Right.
Quinn
Like it's a very actually like I think nuanced character study of Anne Hathaway listening to the commentary while being very fun. 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah. And it's just like she never comes across as like, “Yes, I'm the star and I'm super famous and everyone should love me!” It's kind of like, “Yes, I'm putting in the work and I like really thought about this character and I really wanted to do a good job in this movie and I think everyone else worked really hard on it too.” And like definitely giving credit where credit is due and not really being super like... I mean obviously she talks about her own experiences, but not being super self-centered and like like everyone should be talking about me right now. 
Quinn 
And I think all three of the commentators really had that posture because Anne Hathaway does a great job of like mentioning like the lighting in this scene is beautiful and done by this person, that tailor was a tailor who works in Ireland. But I also think that like Hugh Dancy talks a lot about the stuntmen and like it's clear that he was like, legitimately really good friends with them, like during filming and would hang out with them. And like I think Tommy O’Haver also really like spotlights you know, actors and other people that worked on the movie. Like, I think you listen to it and it's like not like just them listing the credits, but it's like interesting seeing all of the different people that they each had to work with and spent time with. And like, how interesting it is just to put all these different people with all these different specialties in the same project together and just like stunt men interacting with movie stars and interacting with directors, interacting with lighting designers, interacting with other actors, it's all just very interesting to hear about the interactions that went into making the movie. 
Jane 
Yeah, it really highlights which I think I mean is probably true of pretty much every movie is that, like, just how interactive making a movie is, and just like what a collaborative effort it is. And it's not just like, oh, there's a few people involved and then there's, like, the background people that kind of help a little bit. It's like everybody really has to work together and like that's probably obvious to people who have made movies before. But I think when you're in the audience, you might not necessarily realize, I mean you see the long credits at the end, but just like how many people are involved in bringing this together and just how much they have to work together and trust each other to do their jobs. And I think that the Ella Enchanted commentary was kind of one of my first glimpses into just exactly what that looked like. And I think that that's part of what has like led me to be further interested in like, I'm not saying like I'm a filmmaker, but just sort of finding out a little bit more of the behind the scenes filmmaker stuff was really interesting to me without it feeling like, OK, now you're sitting down to a Filmmaking 101 class it it's all very fun the way they present it, but just like it gets you thinking of like, wow, there's so many people who work on movies that you never see who are really crucial to the process, and I really like that aspect of it and that they're definitely sure to give people as much credit as they can and not like you said, not listing the credits, just saying like, oh, this scene was really this person, like, really made it by doing their job kind of thing. And yeah, I really like that.
Quinn 
Yeah, and I think lots of DVD features have commentary on them, and so we've talked a lot about this commentary and it kind of leads to the question like what do you get from this commentary that like maybe you don't get in other movies with commentary? Cause I can't imagine there's another one on your list that like truly, you couldn't think of without the commentary which Ella Enchanted, I mean, it's inextricable from why you've watched this movie so many times. You wouldn't have watched this movie so many times without this commentary. I think it has all of these great things we've been talking about how deep it is, but it's also very funny.
Jane
Yes.
Quinn
And I feel like, you know, we quote and we've Mandela effected quotes from this commentary where like they don't actually say what we have ended up quoting years later, but like we quote this commentary so much to each other. Like probably the most quotable moment is like there's a point where Ella is supposed to in the movie like end up stopped in the middle of the road and there's like a horse drawn carriage that’s going to come and roll her over and she can't move because she's been ordered to stay because the Prince is going back to get the purse that she was carrying with her. And like they just describe how the line was originally, “MY SATCHEL!!!” when she realizes that she doesn't have it, and then the Prince is like, “Wait right there. I'll go get it.” And they're like, we had to cut that because we couldn't say it without laughing and they were like, then we I think we said, well, where's my satchel? We changed mine to where's my satchel and we still couldn't do it. S then in the movie is like, “Where's my purse?” is what she ends up saying. But like the “MY SATCHEL!” quote like, it's just the whole commentary is stuff like that. My other one of my other favorites, I can't even say things are above the other because it's all amazing. It's like, I guess all the sets had these different like almonds for Prince Char? 
Jane 
Yeah, all the, the castle sets had these dishes of candied almonds. 
Quinn 
Yeah, and it was just like this weird character study. And they're like, we want everyone in the Kingdom to enjoy my almonds! Like that Prince Char has his, like, favorite almonds. It's like this random detail that, like, you never would notice. There's just so many quotable moments, and like by all of them, all three of them really have great, hysterical little one liners. 
Jane 
Yeah, I was struggling to come up with a quote to use at the end of last episode because I was like all the good quotes are in the commentary. Yeah, cause the my satchel thing in particular, I feel like, I can't hear the word satchel without thinking of that, and sometimes I just think of it randomly. Just like “MY SATCHEL!!!”
Quinn 
Yeah and I also think one of the things that we have not yet talked about that I think the commentary does a good job of highlighting too, is that I love the costuming for that movie. I think that the costuming is perfect and they do a great job of talking about the different costumes, and you notice that characters have like signature colors, which I'm always, I don't know. I always really like that in movies when characters have signature colors. I think it's fun. And I I like that what that does visually is kind of like builds like a recognition for a certain character and seeing what color they're wearing, but like, I think it's cool. Like the characters have signature colors. I think the costumes are beautiful and well done, and the commentary does a good job of pointing out when that's the case. I think that Ella Enchanted is such a weird world and like you hear about all the different weird ways that this weird world was created together. But I do think it works surprisingly well like all told. You know, having these like kind of 70s-80s musical influences with kind of this like modern sensibility and the humor with like, costume, that kind of blended old and new with the signature colors, like something whimsical that pops like it all kind of like doesn't make sense in a way that makes sense. 
Jane 
Yeah, I think that the world is kind of similar to the world of Shrek in a way? Like, I think Shrek has a lot of those like… it's like sort of a medieval world, but also there's a lot of modern jokes. And I think that Hercules kind of does that too, of like being like set in the past, but also with these very modern jokes. And I think that was just like a really big thing in like the late 90s/early 2000s to kind of make that sort of world? And they really ran with it and Ella Enchanted. I think they really just leaned into, like, we're going to make this weird. And yeah, it works so much better than you would think it would on paper, if just like, yeah so it's like kind of medieval castle fairy tale but also modern, but also like from a few decades ago, and we're just going to throw all those things together. And yeah, it just really works. And I do agree that the costuming really helps with that because the costumes are, like sort of whimsical, but also like very focused on like the characters and like Ella’s are a lot more practical than like the step-sisters have, like the most ridiculous costumes, especially at the end. 
Quinn 
Shout out to Hattie’s ring in the ball scene. 
Jane 
It is like…her ring is like as big as her hand.
Quinn 
It is so ridiculous and so it's just perfect. 
Jane 
Giant orange. 
Quinn 
And I mean, I love the the fairies, like, especially like Lucinda, like has a very, I would say modern, like it's a very costumey, like think like, sexy fairy at Halloween outfit, but it's like Nope, it works. Let's go for it. And I think also having Heidi Klum in the movie helps with its fashion appeal. 
Jane 
Oh yeah. 
Quinn 
Heidi Klum is a giant. 
Jane 
I wonder if they consulted her, if like, she was a costume consultant too. 
Quinn 
I also have to say that we have not talked at all about Cary Elwes yet.
Jane
Oh yeah! Quinn
And I love his performance, talking about performances, he is clearly having a marvelous time. And I also love kind of the meta connection to Princess Bride because I do also think that there are some elements of, like it's like almost like a more modern frenetic world than Princess Bride is, but there's like, I think they serve as like similar kinds of movies, at least on paper. 
Jane 
Yeah, it does have kind of a similar tone to that. It doesn't have nearly as witty of dialogue as Princess Bride, but it definitely has like, a similar like world feel. Yeah, I definitely see what you’re saying. 
Quinn 
Like you could imagine, some of the characters interacting, so I think it's very… there's a fun parallel that like he's sort of in the story as more the Humperdinck character than, you know, being the romantic lead ultimately that he is in Princess Bride. 
Jane 
And he he was like just… He's so good, like, especially because like, as his character progresses. Like earlier in the movie, he's just sort of, like, vaguely menacing. And by the end, he's, like, completely like… maniacal laughing, just like going completely overboard with, like, I've just completely lost my mind! And he does that so well, like- 
Quinn 
And that's you can tell that's a choice that he made as an actor because you could have very easily played all of that very flat and probably not gotten the effect like you get that from his performance is what really gives you that story. 
Jane 
Yes. Oh my gosh I love the scene when he, after Hattie, has told him that Ella has to do whatever she's told, and he's, like, making her do the hokey pokey and all this stuff. But he's doing the most ridiculous dance in the background and it's like you're trying to make her look silly, but you look way sillier and it's so good. 
Quinn 
Yeah, like just the the gleeful evil of of it all. Yeah, it's it's really, it's fantastic acting. I'm telling- like, up, up, down, anywhere you look in this movie: well acted. 
Jane 
Yeah, 100% of the time. And then he has a snake sidekick. Which is very like reminiscent of a lot of Disney villains - which is part of why I always think this movie is Disney, but it's not Disney - but I think that they did a really good job with that snake. I guess originally they were going to have like an animatronic puppet and they just couldn't get it to work so they ended up-
Quinn 
Can you imagine how silly that would have looked? Like, I think them talking about their pathway to arriving at the conclusion that this snake had to be CGI is very funny in the commentary. 
Jane 
Yes, yes. Because it's like, um yeah, no, that wouldn't have worked. So they ended up with a CGI snake. And I think it looks good. 
Quinn 
It's very well done. It's fantastic and I think the the actor, I mean it's mostly a voice performance, but the acting is very good with Heston as well. 
Jane 
Yeah! Yeah , so I think that and that really adds to carry out was his character. What is his name? Edgar?
Quinn 
Edgar, who is the evil uncle. Sorry if we haven't said that. Yes, he is the king, who is the uncle of Prince Charmont, who is Hugh Dancy.
Jane 
And I think like the uncle killed the father? 
Quinn 
Yes. 
Jane 
It's like a little, little Hamlet moment. 
Quinn 
It’s kind of – a criticism: It's kind of thrown together. It's like, OK, I guess he killed the father. Like I want to see him killing the father. I wanna see the blood on his hands! 
Jane 
And then he's trying to kill Char also, I'm not exactly sure why… 
Quinn 
It's kind of Lion King action like… 
Jane 
Because Char was going to be coronated. Yes!
Quinn 
So I guess he was like kind of a Regent ruler because the dad had been killed and and the dad was much more, the king was much more tolerant of other life groups like ogres and elves, and then Edgar becoming the king, he made a lot of these like species segregationist policies so...
Jane
Yeah
Quinn
It's presumed that with Ella next to the throne and with Char being a much more morally upright person that with Edgar's passing and his coronation, things went right in Frell or Lamia or whatever the kingdom's name is, because Ella’s from Frell and Lamias where the castle is. I don't know what the whole common is called. Andalasia. 
Jane 
[laughs] Probably. It's also really interesting how they decided that, like the people from Lamia would have English accents, and the people from Frell would have American accents, and then they cast like mainly American people to be the Lamia people and mainly British people to be the Frell people. 
Quinn 
It was chaotic what was going on with the accents. 
Jane 
Yeah so people had to do different accents. I mean not entirely, cause like Hugh Dancy is actually English and had his normal accent. Anne Hathaway had her normal accent, but like, just like Minnie Driver had to do an American accent. 
Quinn 
And that one notable fairy who has that bit part does like a New York accent in in Lamia, but she was like Irish. 
Jane 
Yeah, well, yeah. And the person who plays Ella's mom was actually British or Irish or something, and…
Quinn 
[New York accent] Finding her would be something terrible.
Jane
[laughs] Yeah.
Quinn 
So many good lines! 
Jane 
There's some, there's some very strange accents going on, but it's fine. It works. 
Quinn 
Also Parminder Nagra is there.
Jane
Oh yeah.
Quinn
And she is honestly not one of the more memorable performances, but she does a really good job! 
Jane 
It's really upsetting, like, that's like one criticism that I have: I would really like to have seen another scene with Parminder Nagra's character at the end like… 
Quinn 
It's really stuck in there, like the resolution of that storyline with like like it- you can tell they like there was probably some scheduling problem of like her filming ER or something because like, it is weird. Like Areida is Ella's best friend. And and like they set up their characters and Ella actually like, really like screws her over because of the curse. 
Jane 
Yeah, it's a heartbreaking scene. 
Quinn 
It's a really sad scene and then I think that for whatever reason, they couldn't film any better resolution to that story other than like she just comes to the wedding and like, there's a cutaway scene where she's waving to the carriage and just goes, “Good luck, Ella!” 
Jane 
And you know she was waving at nothing. 
Quinn 
And yeah, like, there's no way those women were in the same room when that happened. 
Jane 
Yeah, I mean, she is in the room at the wedding, like with her, and they cause she's part of the Don't Go Breaking My Heart 
Quinn 
Yeah, but like I that could have been filmed in post too, that cutaway shot. 
Jane 
That is true. Um, yeah so I think they really needed a scene where Ella explained what had happened. 
Quinn 
And like you assume that they were, you know, they healed the friendship, and they were in a good place. But like, they never said that. 
Jane 
Yeah, it's like, I mean, I get that they put that in there to show just like how bad, because that kind of was what pushed Ella over the edge of like, I guess I just have to live with this curse to being like, no, I need to get rid of this because her stepmother made her tell her best friend, like, “I could never be friends with you, and you suck, go away” basically. 
Quinn 
And yeah, I really, I think if it was a better script or like a better story, like the movie version, I don't really remember like how it happened in the book, but for the movie world that was created, I think involving Areida in some of the machinations at the end to, like take down Edgar would have, really fixed a lot of the, like narrative hole that is left with that storyline, like just to have Areida like give her some marginal role even where like she's for some reason there and can like help them do one thing like in the sequence to take down Edgar. Like just plug her in somewhere. And I think that would have been really nice to like have like her helping the cause and like reestablishing their relationship and then like then maybe you don't really need a final scene between them. You can just kind of use what you have at the end and be like, yeah, they figured it out. 
Jane 
Yeah, I agree that definitely would have been a really good way to do it, but… 
Quinn 
I mean, they have Heidi Klum in the end part like... 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah. Because she and Slannen have a thing. 
Quinn 
Yeah, they get together, which is there's a lot of questions I have, but it's fine. 
Jane 
Yeah, but I think that that's really, I mean, no offense to the writers, but I think there were like 5 writers on this movie, and like I don't know that they had a cohesive idea of what they were going to do with it. I think it was kind of like, OK, there's this really popular book and this really popular actress that we can write a thing for. 
Quinn 
And doing movies like this is very popular. 
Jane 
Yeah, exactly. So yeah, this is the time to do this sort of modernized but not fairy tale type thing. And we're just going to throw it together and hope for the best. And I think that it does work a lot better than it had any right to on paper, based on the dialogue and the script. And they talk about that a little bit in the commentary. They're like, very gracious about it, but there's certain moments where they're like, “Yeah, I never really liked this line,” or, like, “I never really felt like I said this right.” 
Quinn 
I think they're pretty upfront with saying the lines that they had issues with saying. 
Jane 
Yeah, but they're not, they're not gonna, say like, “Oh this whole script was trash.” 
Quinn 
Yeah, yeah. And I mean, in fairness, there's a couple funny, like “My tongue itches” is funny. 
Jane 
That is true. Yeah, there's some good lines in the actual script, but I think overall that's really the weak point. And just like the fact that they were able to get these amazing actors and some of them are like super famous, others I like, haven't really seen in anything else. 
Quinn 
Eric Idle is in the movie also. 
Jane 
Oh, I forgot about him! 
Quinn 
See, like you just keep thinking of people. There's a lot of performances. 
Jane 
And I think that they all just showed up and were like, “We're gonna have fun. We're gonna make this movie.” And it just really comes together in a very entertaining way. 
Quinn 
I do think also what helps is that the characters they're playing are all kind of archetypes. What talented actors are able to do, they're able to take these archetypal characters and sort of have an interpretation of them kind of ready to go. And so I'm, I'm also kind of thinking like, that's these are just good professional actors that like these are not like tough characters. They're just like they're ones that you can really like sink into and, like, get- they're, they're like, really meaty roles that like a good actor, will know what to do with. 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah, I agree with that, that's a good way of putting it. So yeah, so it's just it's just fun entertainment, but again, it just becomes like so much more fun and entertaining when you have the commentary on and you just hear them chatting with each other about their memories of making this movie and the good and the bad and the ugly. 
Quinn 
And if you like podcasts, I imagine you'll like the commentary because it it really does, I think feel like you're just sitting around the table with friends or sitting on the couch watching the movie with, you know, the friends or like people that were making the movie. Like it's a a really good aura that the commentary has. I feel like and again and thinking about like what does the commentary have that other commentaries don't? Like I think a lot of other commentaries are very cold and very like stale almost and like they come in for these very like discrete parts and they'll say, I did want to mention when we were watching this that this blah blah blah. And then they'll stop and they'll go back to the movie. Like, this is just this continual conversation that goes throughout the movie pretty much. 
Jane 
Yeah, I think a lot of times, especially when the commentary just has the director, they can get very technical with like just saying, like explaining how each shot was set up. And just like, I mean some of that is very interesting, but I think it almost feels like you're like going to film school or something or like you're sitting in a lecture and I definitely tend to prefer the ones that have multiple people and especially like, I mean, I don't want to say like we only care about the actors, but I think actors know how to perform better than directors do a lot of the time, and so they know how to be entertaining. I would say Ella Enchanted is like far and away my favorite, but there's a few others, like I talked about the Mary Poppins one. And I think that one is really fun for different reasons, because they're looking back with like 40 years of distance. But it's the same sort of thing of like they're interacting with each other and reminiscing together. And I think that's a lot more interesting than just hearing one person sort of give you a lecture about how this movie came together. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah, and what the actors do, and I mean that's what they are when you're watching the movie, they are the audiences perspective, like into the world of the movie and, and so I think that you you feel like, you know, actors in a way that you don't feel like you know directors or people that are not on camera. And so, yeah, I think they're very practiced at bringing that perspective to an audience and sort of serving as that messenger or the gateway that an audience has to a story. And then I think to Tommy O’Haver’s credit. I think he's very charismatic. And so you feel like you know him or you like, get to know him through the course of the commentary. There's many directors whose commentary I've seen that I didn't really get a sense of who they were as people, but I feel like you get to know Tommy O’Haver and you like him. 
Jane 
Yeah, I think that he, like, definitely takes his work seriously, but I think he doesn't think too highly of himself. I think a lot of directors have really big egos, which I think to a certain extent you have to for that job because you have to be in charge and you have to like get people to listen to you and so you have to think relatively highly of yourself. Otherwise you're gonna be like, “Well or- or not or whatever.” And you can't do that when you're a director. But I think that with Tommy O'Haver, he's like, he wants people to have fun on his sets, I think. And he's like, very proud of his work on this movie, clearly. But he's also, like, very gracious to the stars that he's talking to and like, very quick to point out when they did a good job, which I think they're more hesitant to do, like they don't want to toot their own horns as much. And so he's like, very much like, saying, “Wow, you guys were really great to work with and you did such a good job too.” And like that, they were exactly what he wanted for this movie. And I think that really helps make the commentary just seem a lot more fun, too, is that he's not being like, “I made this movie and I was so great.” It was like, “Thank you guys for doing such a good job.” and all of that, so I really like that. 
Quinn 
Yeah, he's he seems like- I would, I would be an actor or, like, work on a movie that he was the director for. I feel like he would be a good person to work with. And yeah, I do, it's interesting that you note that they the actors do I feel like have a hard time like tooting their own horn and like one of the main things that I feel like Anne Hathaway is comfortable like talking about is like her physical appearance. And like, she'll be like, “Oh, my extensions look so good at that point.” And I do feel like that's something that, like you think about, like the Harvey Weinstein of it all and like just a lot of some of the really, like, dark things about Hollywood and like, how sad that is that like, that's what she felt like, you know, those were some of the ways that she could, like, step into her own and, like, talk positively about herself. And then you think about like all other things that were going on like in the industry at large. I also think it's really great to hear like, a man complementing like the female star of the movie, who was like indisputably the star of the movie. And again, another good example of like female led projects like they're this idea that they're not as successful. It’s like here is another like- that's something I love about this movie, that it is a female led movie, that it's like, yeah, Anne Hathaway is perfectly capable of carrying a movie on her own shoulders. 
Jane 
Yeah, and it's interesting too that like the director doesn't at any point that I recall in the commentary. Maybe, he says, like… Because I do think like Anne Hathaway does complement her own appearance, she all is also very critical of it. 
Quinn 
Well, and and that's also true too. I mean just I think that's sort of where I was going, too and tying in like some of the larger cultural things, she is very critical of her appearance at times too. 
Jane 
One of my favorite parts though, is when she's like watching herself perform and she's, like, cringing. And they're like, “What are you..? And she's like, “Oh, it’s just a tooth thing.” 
Quinn 
Well, they're in the middle of complementing the lighting in the scene, and they're just like, “Oh, this lighting is so beautiful” and it is really beautiful. It's like flickering flames that of course, were, like, done digitally, but it looks very real and they're complimenting it and then and and Hathaway just goes, “Eugh!” And then then she's just like, “Sorry, it was a tooth thing.” 
Jane 
Yeah, but I think that what I was gonna say is I don't remember at any point, I don't think he ever really talks about her appearance other than to say, like, “Oh you look fine” when she's criticizing herself. I think that he's way more focused on her work and her her performance and like how dedicated she was and like she was in basically every scene and that she had to work really hard and he really gives her a lot of credit for that. And I think that's, like you were saying, a big problem in Hollywood is that a lot of actresses like you focus more on their appearance and what they're wearing and all this stuff. And I think it’s really great to see a male director recognizing that his female star really put in a lot of work and did a lot of stuff besides, just like looking pretty in this movie. And that's yeah, it's really great to hear that, especially on a movie that was produced by Harvey Weinstein. 
Quinn 
Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's very true. And I just, I think. We've already spoken a little bit about this, but like, Anne Hathaway is just such a treasure, I think, like, and it's been very interesting, and like I I mentioned her in the same sentence with like Jennifer Lawrence and Emma Stone earlier in this conversation. And like, just thinking about, like, what Anne Hathaway's trajectory has been, and then what those actresses’ trajectories have been where I think there there was, you know, generally good favor around Anne Hathaway for a long time. And then, like all of a sudden kind of around the time of her Oscar win, people kind of soured on her and felt that she really was sort of distasteful. And then just like having her image kind of come back around from there and now I think she has a very like, you know, people have a lot of, like, nostalgic affection for her being in all these beloved classics like Princess Diaries and Devil Wears Prada and Ella Enchanted. But then she's also, you know, an Oscar winner and like, taken very seriously, like, I think she's kind of reached that, like, you know, prime part of her career where she's been through all of these things. And we've seen actresses like Emma Stone and Jennifer Lawrence kind of on a delayed timeline, go through some of these same things like, I just think that Anne Hathaway, I really have a lot of respect and appreciation for all of the things that she's weathered. Being a young woman in Hollywood and having to kind of- that she was in these beloved projects. She's had periods of being very well loved, periods of being kind of hated and has sort of weathered the storms and has continued to to work and deliver really phenomenal performances, I just- I think she's such a gift and I'm glad that she's still out there kicking ass and making amazing movies. Like I love Ocean's 8, that's fairly recent, and I think that she still has some very exciting career moves left. I'm- I can't wait to see her as she continues. 
Jane 
Yeah, and I think it's really interesting because she was getting a lot of hate for a while, for like no really good reason. Like, I don't feel like anyone could point to like something horrible that she said or did. Like maybe she like said something that was maybe a little bit questionable, but like, I think now people are coming around to being more like, you know, she was never actually terrible. People were just mad at her for being a successful woman like, cause, I mean, some people like they said something super racist or something or like that was interpreted in a bad way. But I don't even know that anyone's been able to point to something like that. 
Quinn 
I think probably the thing that I heard or that that's been on in the news cycle was the Witches movie that she was in and sort of depicting people with limb differences as like witches and, there was some backlash to the way that the witches were portrayed and how that looked similarly to people with limb differences and sort of othered people with limb differences, or at least this was some criticism of that movie. And I thought that Anne Hathaway had a really, um… I was impressed with the apology that she offered and she made, I thought, a really powerful, well thought out statement that just said, “I didn't really do my homework fully here and this is upsetting because I upset people that I did not want to upset” and it owned the mistake, and just you know, said that she would be more careful moving forward and you know, like, I just think that's something that I appreciate someone that can stand up and apologize when they did something not fully thought out. 
Jane 
Yeah. Well, and I don't remember hearing anything about that, but like the Witches was based on a novel by Raold Dahl, whose prejudices are well known at this point. 
Quinn 
Yeah, so I I think it's… I don't think that Anne Hathaway should be held accountable for like production decisions that were probably outside of her control, but she still did take accountability. And I thought in a way that- I appreciated the thoughtfulness of the statement I ended up reading. 
Jane 
Yeah, I think that she's always been very good about responding to things which, like, maybe she just has a really good PR team. But like, she definitely always knows how to, like, stand up for herself when she needs to, but then also, you know, not just double down when she makes mistakes. And I think that's really great. I know she was like a really big advocate for legalizing gay marriage and things like that. Like, she's really been somewhat of an activist in terms of issues that she really cares about, which I think is great. She's just a really… seems like a really good role model to be a movie star. I mean, obviously she's not perfect. I don't think that anyone has a right to expect her to be perfect, but I did really appreciate that, like when Ocean's 8 came out and everybody was like, “Wow, Anne Hathaway is like, the best part of this movie that is a great movie and has a lot of great parts.” And then some people were like, “Yeah, she's the best part of every movie she's in. Why has it taken you this long to notice?” Like people kind of coming back around to being like, “Yeah, she's always been good. Why did we hate her?” 
Quinn 
Well, and I think it's fabulous because in that movie she plays an actress who you kind of think is going to be like, obnoxious and not really that great. And then she ends up being, like, essential to the con and… 
Jane 
Yes, I love that. And like I kind of wish that they had done something like that in Ella Enchanted with Parminder Nagra's character. 
Quinn 
Right. 
Jane 
Like, that's what they needed to do is like bring her back and have her be like, “Yeah, OK, you really hurt me. But now I'm gonna help you” kind of thing. Yeah. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah. And I mean, I guess I do feel like you tend to have things for actors and actresses that are older. You know, I think of a lot of your actor obsessions being, you know, people from a bygone era that were dead before you were born. I feel like Anne Hathaway has been an actress that sort of we've grown up with that we've sort of seen come of age - we remember a time before Anne Hathaway and saw her rise - that you've really enjoyed. And I think have looked at as like I would say, I think you're a particular fan of Anne Hathaway. And like I I think that that's that's interesting, and I'm curious if… you've probably already described many of the things that maybe have drawn you to her more so than like other actors of her generation. 
Jane 
Yeah, I would definitely… I mean, I'm sure there's bigger Anne Hathaway fans than me, I'm not like her number one fan or anything, but definitely she's one of the actors that I've been more of a fan of. And like, she's less than 10 years older than me, so she’s like pretty close to my generation and I think that a lot of it is that, like, she's an Old Hollywood fan, like she has a lot of those sensibilities of, like, the Old Hollywood actors. And I think that that is something that I've picked up on even without like that consciously being why I like her. But I do think that that has helped. That like she is definitely very modern, but in a way that takes things I liked about the older Hollywood style. Like I think she probably would say that she's more of a method actor and a lot of the actors I like are kind of before that became the norm. But like, I think she's still very much the like, get up there, say the lines and think about that rather than just being like, “I'm going to fully embody this character!” which is something that kind of irritates me about actors sometimes as being like, “I'm just becoming this person now.” It's like, I think she she's got that sort of line between herself and her characters that a lot of the like, more like modern stars… I mean, I'm, I know there's modern actors who are great, but I think the like movie star leading role people kind of rub me the wrong way sometimes. But like I think that she has similarities to like the old Hollywood stars that I'm a fan of, and sort of bridges that gap into the modern era, if that makes any sense? I truly don't know if I’m explaining this- 
Quinn 
I think that's all really interesting and I think makes a lot of sense. I think that's a cool observation and I'm just thinking tying it back to Ella Enchanted, I was thinking the last time I watched it specifically, I was like, what is different about Ella from Princess Mia? Like where… where are the lines there? And in truth, I think that there's a lot that's similar about Princess Mia and about Ella. And like I think that, yeah, that makes a lot of sense because I know that you really love like Cary Grant, for example, who I think Cary Grant has range and has performances that it's very transformative between roles, but he does have a brand and he has a style and like a lot of movies, it's like here's like a specific character, like this one's a scientist, this one's a teacher, this one's a, a that and we're just going to do the Cary Grant version of like that profession or like that. Like we're going to give him a few boundaries to work with that are like character defining traits, but then he's going to bring the Cary Grant brand to it. And they feel like that's almost what the transition from Princess Mia to Ella Enchanted is, is it's like, we're going to change the the formation of these characters in a little bit of different ways, and like I I notice like the Princess Mia, Lily friendship is kind of flipped in Ella Enchanted, and like Arieda is much more like Mia, and Ella is much more like Lily in that dynamic and like that, the fact that they're activists and like going to, like protests and stuff, I feel like kind of mirrors each other. But it's very much Anne Hathaway bringing the Anne Hathaway brand to each of those characters, and like they're both very Anne Hathaway. Like, you get her as a star, you get the brand of her, you get the identity of her while she's in kind of just these different formations of like, that protagonist character that leads the movie one way or the other. 
Jane 
Yeah, I think it's like there's certain movie stars who, just like, always play the same character. And it's like, OK, that's that actor, that's that actor, that's that actor, and it gets a little bit redundant. And then there's other actors who are like very much blend into their roles, which if it's done well, I think that that's really good and I really appreciate that. Like, I like Meryl Streep, and like those kind of like… really good. But I think there's some actors who are like, “I'm just going to be completely different in this movie!” and it just, like, doesn't quite… gel with me, I guess? I don't know. But like, I think my favorite kind of actors tend to be the ones where, like you can always tell it's them, but they're doing different things and like they're very versatile within their wheelhouse, like it's not they're doing the same thing every time, but at the same time they they bring themselves to it. And I think that that that Anne Hathaway is very much like that. Because obviously like playing Fantine in Les Mis is very different from playing Ella in Ella Enchanted like they're completely different characters. And I'm not saying like, “Ohh yeah, but it was just Anne Hathaway doing that.” Like, she's a good actress. But I guess I just, I feel like I get her persona a little bit more and like I… I don't want to say it like I'm trying to like insult any actors, but I just think that I tend to resonate with the ones that are more in the style of the Old Hollywood people who were like themselves, like you were saying bringing Cary Grant brand to different characters and I think Anne Hathaway has a very strong star personality and I think that that really comes out in the Ella Enchanted commentary and I think that it's very telling that that was like so early in her career because it was only a few years after Princess Diaries. But she was already like, “This is me. This is who I am. I'm a fully formed person and I'm not going to let Hollywood mess me up too much,” I think, because I think a lot of people fame can really go to their head. And I think that, I mean, there's no way for it not to a little bit, but I feel like… at least the way she comes across, I'm not claiming to know her, but I feel like Anne Hathaway has- seems to have kept her integrity throughout the fame. And I really respect that and it's been really fun to see that like through the ups and downs of her career so far, and I'm sure there's much more to come from her, she's not that old, so I'm sure she'll be- 
Quinn 
Right. No, we're it's not… this is not a memorial of Anne Hathaway. But yeah, I think that makes sense. It's interesting to hear what's really attractive about her from your perspective. Because I I, I think that does make a lot of sense, and I really do kind of see her as someone in that that just kind of feels right, you know, in thinking about Anne Hathaway as someone who's sort of… is in the older school of, you know, being that type of star, and I really do think that that's some of her best strengths as an actor and that she's she's immediately someone familiar. Like she, we've grown up with her on screen in various roles and like I think that that is something that a lot of those older actors really bring to like a sense of familiarity, and that allows you to really get into the story because they have such potent brands and their brands are not necessarily like “I'm a completely different person in everything I'm in.” Like I'm almost like Meryl Streep is an actress who people talk about as being very transformative. I almost think like Nicole Kidman is kind of that actress. I'm just like, “Satine is the same person as Virginia Woolf?!” Like she's someone to me that I'm like, Nicole Kidman could be anybody, like… 
Jane 
Yeah, or like Daniel Day-Lewis. 
Quinn 
Yeah. Yeah, like additional people. 
Jane 
And like, no offense to them like, I think they're amazingly talented and I- 
Quinn 
I think what you're describing is like actors that maybe don't have the ability to be that transformed or just like are overcommitted to the process, to the point where it's just like an excuse to be mean to people. Like Jared Leno. 
Jane 
Oh yeah, everybody who's played the Joker has been like, “I'm going to use this to be mean to people.” So yeah, there are definitely actors who do that really well and like, all power to them, tons of respect. But I think that there's some actors that just try to do stuff throughout their career that I'm just sort of like, that's fine, but I don't really like love that as much. And I think that in the Princess Diaries 2 commentary Anne Hathaway talks quite a bit about old movies that she likes. And I think that that is sort of what has given me the impression of, like, oh, that's why I like her. Because she also is taking from these old movies. And I think that a lot of the more modern actors who I like have something in common with the Old Hollywood style of acting. 
Quinn 
Is this the first Anne Hathaway movie on the podcast? 
Jane 
I think so.
Quinn
Oh!
Jane
I think it's only this and Princess Diaries. 
Quinn 
OK. That makes sense that I haven't really heard your thoughts about Anne Hathaway on the podcast yet. Another comment that I wanted to make about Anne Hathaway's performance style: I actually see a lot of similarities to Ginger Rogers and like how you were describing Ginger Rogers was like, at least perceived by Katharine Hepburn at like the time of Stage Door. I can see some similarities in like how they came across, and I think Anne Hathaway is less known for her dancing, but just the, you know, the really like competent professional model that can deliver really versatile performances and kind of has a few like tricks. And it's not just the acting, it's also the singing, or also the dancing or both. I I see, I see there being something sort of similar between the two of them. 
Jane 
Yeah. And just like that, people wanted to work with them. Because I think that was part of Katherine Hepburn's issues earlier in her career is that she was very difficult to work with, which like I understand like- 
Quinn 
 [laughing] I can't imagine Katharine Hepburn being difficult. 
Jane 
I know, right? 
Quinn 
That's why she's the perfect Susan Vance! 
Jane 
She was like like, I mean, obviously I feel like even now women are not treated very well in Hollywood. And back then, it was very bad in a lot of ways. And so, like, I can't really fault her for like, standing up for herself, and that got you labeled as difficult, so I think some of it was that, but I think also just like I think Ginger Rogers would have been willing to be friends with her, and she was very much like, “No. We are not friends.” Based on Anne Hathaway’s commentary, like, it seems like she’s very gracious towards everybody she was working with and like, I mean, maybe there's people out there who've worked with Anne Hathaway who were like, “Oh, no, she was horrible.” But I don't think I've heard any stories about her actually being hard to work with, whereas like some stars like I just off the top of my head, Christian Bale comes to mind of like crew members being like, “He just always yells at us” and stuff like that, and I think that like easy to work with for actresses can be code for just like very compliant and never standing up for themselves. And I don't think that that's what Anne Hathaway is like. But I do think that, yeah, she's more of a Ginger Rogers than a Katharine Hepburn in terms of like people want to work with her. So yeah, I think that's a good, that's a good analogy to draw. We’ve talked a lot about Anne Hathaway, but I think she deserves it. 
Quinn 
Yeah, well, I'm… knowing that this is her debut on your countdown, I I feel like she's somebody that I think of as a modern interest of yours. Someone who's still alive that you like and follow to some extent. 
Jane 
Yeah, well, there's- when I keep track of the movies I watch, there are certain actors who I update every year when I update my spreadsheet of like how many movies I've seen of theirs and how many times, and like list out like which movies I've seen which number of times for each of them, and most of the actors I track are from Old Hollywood. There's a few more modern ones. Yeah, Anne Hathaway is definitely one of those. And I think that also like being introduced to her along with Julie Andrews, like I wasn't a huge Julie Andrews fan before Princess Diaries. And so I think that like that movie, which I will talk about later, but that really made me really like both of them. And so I kind of think of like, me being a fan of Anne, starting at the same time as Julie Andrews. And so they kind of, like, go together in my mind. And I think having this other movie that's kind of similar to Princess Diaries in that she's playing sort of a princessy type character, but different soon after that really helped fuel my interest in like, keep my interest in Anne Hathaway after Princess Diaries. 
Quinn 
Yeah, it's honestly beautiful in many ways to think about that pairing for Princess Diaries cause I think I'm sure you're not alone in some way in that story of being introduced to both of them at the same time, or reintroduced, I think a lot of people probably know the Sound of Music and Mary Poppins at least. But yeah, I mean, I think that it's very cool that like, what a great, you know, way to burst onto the Hollywood scene than with the Julie Andrews movie and yeah, I think it's cool to think of how a lot of people must have become fans of both of them at the same time and must kind of attach these two very talented women who have both dominated the entertainment industry for quite some time. I think it's, yeah, it's, it's cool to think about that that's where Anne Hathaway started in a lot of homes. 
Jane 
Yeah, you know, and Julie Andrews continues to have a career, but also is more known for being sort of at the end of the classic Hollywood era, and that she similarly burst onto the scene with a big role that made her an instant star because- 
Quinn 
And that was sort of a kids’ movie too. 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah, exactly. It was a Disney movie. And so like to start as the star of a Disney movie and then just kind of go from there. And Julie Andrews has also had many ups and downs in her career with people loving her and then not liking her that much and like that has happened to her as well, which I think it happens to anybody if you're around long enough. But yeah. So I think that having that connection to Old Hollywood directly also seems more of my jam. And it was fun for me to see somebody closer to my age also talking about liking old movies and things like that. I'm like, OK, cool. I'm not alone in being interested in Old Hollywood, as a younger person who's still alive. And I'm sure that there's a lot of other actors who feel similarly also, like I think you kind of have to if you know your craft, you're going to have seen older movies. But yeah, I think she's been open about like, “Yeah, I I like Audrey Hepburn” and things like that, so… 
Quinn 
I was going to say she does give me a very Audrey Hepburn type vibe, but like almost like spunkier than Audrey Hepburn but Audrey Hepburn was pretty spunky too, so I wouldn't. I wouldn't take that away from her.
Jane
Yeah.
Quinn
To completely change the subject: amatonormativity. This movie is a love story. How do you feel about that? 
[both laugh]
Jane 
Yeah, it is definitely a love story. I do think that it's interesting that like, Ella does not at any point set out to find love. She does fall in love with Char definitely, but that's not her objective. Like it's an important part of this story, but ultimately like, that's not what the story's about. Like, I think it's much more about her curse and trying to break away from her having to be obedient. 
Quinn 
And really, her learning to use love as a tool to be the, you know, the most, like, actualized curse-liberated version of herself. I think that that's like important, too. Like she she realizes that love is something that she wants in her life, like a romantic love is something that she she wants and that that is sort of how she learns to use love as a way to break the curve. 
Jane 
Yeah and I feel like it's never really been an option for her up until that point, because I think that one of two things would happen. Either she would marry someone who would then, like, completely take advantage of her curse and just- 
Quinn 
Yes, that would be very scary for her. 
Jane 
Or she would end up really hurting her partner by having to do stuff because someone else told her to, and that kind of almost happens the second one. Because Char is very kind and understanding and like even there's certain moments in the movie when he like says something and she starts to do it and he's like “That wasn't an order. Like, I'm not trying to make you do stuff you don't want to do.” 
Quinn 
He's very taken aback by her in all ways because he's used to women throwing themselves at him and so he's very taken aback that Ella doesn't do that at the beginning. And then he's taken aback when she's like overly compliant on things that he meant as more like suggestions and just like interpersonal interactions. 
Jane 
Yeah. 
Quinn 
There's a lot of commands and casual conversation we learn through Ella Enchanted. 
Jane 
And I think they do a really good job with that and there's this great moment when he says, “You have to stay,” and she's like, “OK, I'll stay.” And he's like, “Well, no, you don't HAVE to stay.” And she's like, “OK” and she, like starts to leave. He's like, “But I would like you to stay.” And then she does. And I think that she really appreciates that he wants to give her her own agency when she's never been able to have that. But then of course, Edgar manipulates it and tries to get her to kill Char, and I think that that is part of why she was like, “it's not good that I'm in love with him” cause she knew something that could happen. I don't think she anticipated it happening quite like that or quite that soon. So I think it's very strong of her to allow herself to fall in love with Char and then to be able to overcome the curse, fully break it, rather than killing him, and… side note: another of my favorite parts of the commentary is when she says “I do love you, Char,” and then she raises the knife cause she's like being forced to. And in the commentary, the director goes, “I'm just not in love with you.” It's like, that's what you do. You kill them when you say that!
Quinn
It's iconic.
Jane It's great. But anyway, she is in love with him and so I think that again a lot of what I'm learning through this project is a lot of my favorite love stories are the ones where like falling in love is not the path that they were supposed to go on. Like with Sound of Music like she wants to be a nun. She's not supposed to fall in love with anyone. And then she does. And I think that often with amatonormativity the path is like you are going to fall in love and get married and have kids. And for Ella that's not her path at all initially. And so I think I really enjoy stories where people are forging their own path and not doing what society or other people around them tell them to do. Which is especially poignant in this movie because she literally has to do what everybody tells her to do for most of the story. And so I think that like, because there are all these things about like why, not only should she not end up with Char, she shouldn't end up with anybody. And so I think seeing like, but she wants to and she makes that happen for herself is more powerful than a lot of the like, typical romantic stories where it's like, maybe these two people are pulled apart by various forces, but like, they're going to find someone and marry someone. That's less interesting to me than stories like this. 
Quinn 
That's interesting. 
Jane 
But again, it's like there is the romantic element of it, but there's so much more going on and it's so much more about Ella finding herself and finding her own voice when she's being constantly talked over and drowned out. And I think that that's…that's what I like about this story. And like the love story is incidental. But I do think that it's good that Char is so much kinder to her than most of the other people she encounters besides Slannen I guess. 
Quinn 
Other than the romantic relationship, what are your favorite relationships in Ella Enchanted? 
Jane 
Ooh, that's a good question… ha, Edgar and his snake? 
Quinn 
You know that's a good one. I honestly think I might like the Ella and Mandy relationship.
Jane
Oh, yeah.
Quinn
I know it's not emphasized much, but you can just tell that they have a good rapport. I I guess I like Minnie Driver and Anne Hathaway in scenes together, they seem to really have a good chemistry, but yeah, I I like, I like that bond. I think that the step sister bond is funny and interesting. One of my least favorite relationships is the relationship between the father and Ella? Like he is so weird, like because he does- you get the sense he cares about her, and is like mildly intelligent. He's just, like, distant, like, absent, like always on on the road. So he can't be involved in the home situation, but like he's kind of a little weird. 
Jane 
Yeah, he- Well, he's very underdeveloped. And I also think it's very interesting how like, it takes him a really long time to notice that she's gone and you just see, like, this one random scene where he's, like, talking to the stepmother and “Where's Ella?” And she's just like, “Oh, she's off with Hattie and Olive, it's fine.” And it's like she's been gone for many days at this point. Like, did you just notice that she left? 
Quinn 
[stepmother impression] “She’s taking a tour of the castle.” 
Jane 
[continues stepmother impression] “With Hattie and Olive.” I mean, Joanna Lumley just is very, very funny. 
Quinn 
It's honestly the main performance of hers that I think of. I feel like this is very embarrassing. I know she's in lots of other things, but I mainly think of Joanna Lumley as an Ella Enchanted actress. 
Jane 
I mean, I feel like most of the people in this movie, there's like two different levels of people. It's like either, “Oh yeah, from Ella Enchanted!” or like, “They were in Ella Enchanted?!” 
Quinn 
Yeah, there are two choices. 
Jane 
Yeah, except for like Anne Hathaway, obviously it’s like, I know she's in Ella Enchanted, but I don't automatically think of Ella Enchanted. But like Hugh Dancy…
Quinn
He’s Prince Char!
Jane
He's just so ingrained in Ella Enchanted for me and I think that like, obviously, Anne Hathaway is the main star of this movie, but Hugh Dancy does a great job and I think he does a good job also of like stepping back and letting her be the lead of the movie. 
Quinn 
Yeah, he's really fantastic and I like the character of Char and it's all a yes for me on the Prince Char front. And I think like their relationship feels very earned throughout the movie. And I agree, you know, I think that it's like, ugh does every movie have to have a romance? Like there is a a quality of like, this probably didn't need to be there, but it is, but I think it's an earned relationship. I think you can see how they're both willing to be supportive of each other. I think you can see how they're helping each other grow. I think that Ella really does challenge Char’s complacency in his privilege. And I think that, I don't know what does Char really do for Ella? Um... 
Jane 
He saves her! 
Quinn 
Oh yes, he does save her from the ogres. I think that she does view the world in a really adversarial terms because she has to, to, like, protect herself, and I think that he kind of helps her bring down her walls a little bit. I think you see that throughout the course of the movie. So, yeah, I think they're both, like, really enriching each other's lives in a way that is nice, and they have good chemistry. I feel like I would watch the Hugh Dancy/Anne Hathaway rom com in the future, like I would see them paired up in another movie. 
Jane 
Yeah, I think that that one objection that I tend to have for a lot of especially rom coms, but romantic movies in general is that a lot of times I feel like the relationship between the leads is actually kind of toxic if you think about it and, like…
Quinn 
Yes, it's true. 
Jane 
…one of them is stalking the other, like something really creepy is happening that you're supposed to think is cute, and I don't feel like we get that with the Ella Enchanted one. I feel like they have a really good organic falling in love. And also like with a lot of Cinderella adaptations, I feel like the Prince is usually very underdeveloped as a character. 
Quinn 
And it's we talked about this when we watched all the Disney movies. Like it's probably one of the biggest flaws in the Disney Cinderella, which is sort of a standard classic interpretation of Cinderella. I think there's other versions of Cinderella that improve on it a little bit, but there's frankly many that follow in the same footsteps of having kind of an anonymous prince. 
Jane 
Yeah. And like on the one hand, that's fine, cause it's Cinderella's story. But on the other hand, I'm like, this is very much Ella’s story, but I feel like we understand who Char is and he's very well developed and their relationship is very well developed. Like we have many scenes together. At first, like she really doesn't like him. It's a trope that happens in many romantic films of like initially one of them is like, “Ugh, I hate you,” and then they get together eventually. But I think it's very gradual and just feels very organic and it makes sense. And so yeah, I I am in favor of their romance. Like I- 
Quinn 
Well, and he's also, not looking at Ella as a conquest, even though it's very clearly established when they meet that like she's not into him and he is sort of like allured by that because he's very used to like running from a screaming horde of fans. And so, like, you can tell that he's both like this is of interest to him that Ella has resistance to him because it's unusual, but it's not like- There's a very easy way to make that character very toxic then, and to say, like, oh, I'm going to conquest this, and I don't think that that's how he feels about her. And it's really they don't cross paths again until he's saving her life from the ogre. So there's like a very good, like, high stakes reason for him to intervene in her life at that time. Like, there's not, like, a creepy, like, I'm gonna get that girl who resisted me. 
Jane 
Well, and he doesn't know the full story of what she's doing because she's not allowed to tell anyone about the curse. But like he's willing to help her find her fairy godmother, like, basically no questions asked. And you don't ever get the impression that he's, like, doing it to like, because there's, you know, the whole friend zone of, like, “I was nice to her, and now she's not sleeping with me.” Like you don't get the impression that he's helping her to get in her pants or anything. Like he really wants to help her. 
Quinn 
Yeah, there's not really any like subversive stuff that you feel like subversive motivation that he has that you sense he has ever. 
Jane 
Yeah, yeah, I think they do a really good job of that of like, I think he would be OK with being her friend and advocate. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah, and you get the sense that he wants a peer to, like, talk to because he can't talk to any other young women because they're too busy, like screaming about him.
Jane
Yeah.
Quinn
Like, I don't… I can't imagine he's having, like, really deep conversations with a lot of the other people that are in the fan club that are just like, “Char’s naked in the shower?!” and like, just like screaming. Like literally screaming and like chasing him down. Like I think if there's anything that Ella Enchanted is a cutting analysis on stan culture because they really put the stans out there and say “You're blowing your shot by acting this way. It's not cute!” 
Jane 
Yeah, and I I think he also he's like tired of being overly sexualized. And so the fact that she sees him as a person is really like not just to turn on for him. Like obviously that's part of it. And like he falls in love with her partly because she is not screaming at him. But I think, like, just they're able to get to know each other, person to person, and that's really what you feel like their falling in love is is like now that I know you as a person, I really have this deep connection with you, and I think they have some great scenes together that really show that. So again, I like that the romance isn't the main part, but I also really like the way they do the romance in this movie. So I think it gets a pass from me of being like this is a good romance movie. 
Quinn 
The Jane Ace star. 
Jane 
Yes, exactly! You could be aroace and still appreciate the relationship that they have. 
Quinn 
The aroace sealed romance. 
Jane 
There you go. And, yeah, I do think that there's other good relationships. I really wish that the Ella/Areida relationship was better developed because I would really like to have that strong female friendship because again there’s… it is a female driven story, but the secondary characters that are more developed tend to be male characters like Slannen and the ogre Nish…
Quinn
Edgar.
Jane
Edgar, yeah. Whereas like you have, like, the stepmother and the step sisters who are great. And then... 
Quinn 
And and Minnie driver, you have Mandy. 
Jane 
Mandy, yeah, but I would love to see more from them. 
Quinn 
And Lucinda. 
Jane 
Yeah, but Lucinda is, I think every moment she has great. 
Quinn 
And there could be more diversity in the cast, too. That's also a critique. 
Jane 
Yeah, always. But at least they're not all white. 
Quinn 
It's true there is some diversity. 
Jane 
Minimal diversity, but yeah, yeah, absolutely. More diversity, would love to see a… like because everybody kind of, not everybody, but some of the other characters get paired up because you have that random like Slannen and Heidi Klum thing. It was like he could have found a man to be with. Like we could have some, queer pairings here. I mean it’s fine. I think that like I do enjoy this movie on its own. I don't feel like it would have made it into the Top 40 without the commentary. 
Quinn 
Well, yeah. And I think I think it's probably like a less polished version of, like, Mamma Mia in the sense of like, I imagine, like, you would watch this movie for similar reasons that you would watch something like Mamma, Mia and maybe Mamma Mia is just like a little bit sharper of a movie. Although it is also, I think in the same like it's kind of stupid at times and like embraces being stupid and yeah, it's like it's a random musical for no real reason. It's fun and so I feel like that's why it's also easy to watch the commentary because that just like makes it more fun. 
Jane 
Right, yeah. 
Quinn 
And so, you know, I think I agree, I don't know that this is like the best movie on its own. But I think the combination of it being a lot of fun, having fun commentary, sort of striking some of the same balance of like Mamma Mia and other movies that have ended up high in your countdown. That could be what it is. It's just it's just the right cocktail of all of those things. 
Jane 
Yeah. Well, I think it's very chaotic and eclectic, but ultimately, like everybody was making the same movie. And I think that really helps that like, yes, there's all these different pieces and all these different things going on. Which I guess is kind of what makes it feel a bit more old movie-ish that there's like this very convoluted plot of several different characters doing things. But yeah, everybody, I feel like everybody was on the same page. Everybody knew what movie they were making. They knew it was kind of silly and not really that amazing. And they were all just OK with that. And I think that really makes it work a lot better than it would have if people were like, yeah, this is whatever a trashy movie, we're just gonna get paid. And I feel like everybody was just like, we're gonna show up, we're gonna have a good time. And yeah, I think that that really comes across to the audience and that's what makes it an enjoyable movie, despite not being a great movie. 
Quinn 
Yeah. Sounds like the right recipe to end up on your countdown. 
Jane 
Yes, exactly. So thank you so much for being here with me and talking for a very long time about this movie that we both love. 
Quinn 
Thank you so much for having me. This was a lot of fun. I love discussing anything related to Ella Enchanted. 
Jane 
Yes, and I'm so glad that you were here to discuss it with me.
Thank you to Quinn for all of your insights and questions, and thank you listeners for sticking through my longest episode yet. I hope it was still fun and interesting for you – it certainly was for me. Now that we’re in the top half of the list, I feel like I’m going to have more to say about each movie, so they will probably start trending a bit longer, although I’m sure my solo episodes will still be much shorter than this. But before we get back to just me talking I have one more special guest episode lined up, so stay tuned for another long one next week, about a very different type of film. As always, I will leave you with a quote from that next movie: “She may be risking her life, but when it comes to being a lady, she doesn’t hold a candle to your wife, sir, sitting in Washington, playing bridge with three other ladies of great honor and virtue.”
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hotchnerxo · 2 years
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The chances you take: Chapter 15
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Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x single mom!reader
Summary: You've barely had a chance to see Hotch after the new years eve. But you've planned on talking with him after all the annual paperwork is done. Although, more important manners rise up.
Words: 2.2k
Warnings: A case involving a dissapearance of a child (does not and will not include violence of any kind), angst with hurt/comfort.
A/N: Because I can't let things get too happy ( yet ).
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Chapter 15: Doubts
Ever since the event, you haven’t been sure what to think. You’re really not sure if you’re ready to date yet. Adjusting to a new rhythm with Ella has taken its toll on both of you; not knowing when you’re going to be gone for a few hours and when it’s going to be days on end. Every moment you’re off the clock, you’re at home with your daughter or sleeping. Is there any room there for him? And Jack? And it’s not like he has a lot more free time anyway. His schedule is even more hectic than yours. Would trying this out only be a recipe for another heartbreak and therefore even cause problems for your friendship as well as your ability to work with him. 
But on the other hand, it’s him. He’s such a wonderful guy and he understands the limitations the work might bring. He’s also a parent and the kids get along great. He’s so sweet and he’s not one to scare away easily by any baggage you have. Would there be hope for you? Or is it insane to even entertain yourself with the idea of you and him together?
What’s even more frustrating is the fact that you’ve barely seen him all week at work. And there’s so much to do. Apparently it’s the same every first couple of weeks after new years. Every report and casefile needs to be perfected and evaluated from the previous year. And as this is your first year of doing this, it’s taking you forever. 
But it’s not his fault, he’s barely spent five minutes in his office, when he is already needed somewhere by someone. And you’ve texted with him a couple of times about wanting to talk about everything face to face at the end of the week. It’s certainly a conversation the both of you prefer to have in person rather than through text. 
It’s just annoying not having him around. And when you find yourself thinking that more and more; you know your feelings are much deeper than you at first thought. You like seeing him when he’s working inside his office and at times when he comes down for more coffee, the way he mindlessly nos down the stairs is somehow adorable. Or when he comes back from a meeting, he looks over towards his team and you see him smile softly as your eyes meet with him. 
But today, he’s been too stressed to even think about anything else but the next thing on his to do list. 
Your mind wanders to him throughout the day, like it has all week. A loud ring from your work phone next to you drags you back to the moment. 
“Agent (Y/L/N)” you answer the phone, trying to sound less tired than you feel. 
“Hey (Y/N), it’s me” it takes you embarrassingly long for you to realize it’s your mother on the other end of the line. “Is El with you?” 
“What?” The mention of your daughter makes everything else in your head quiet down.  “No. Why?” 
“Are you sure?”
“Am I su- Yes I am sure mom” you hear panic in your voice before you realize the feeling in your body. Agents near you have turned to look at you due to a sudden volume change. “What’s going on?” 
“(Y/N)” she starts quietly but you can tell her voice is starting to shake “I’m at the daycare. She’s not here anymore”. 
You’re glad to be sitting down as you are starting to realize what she means by that. “How is that possible? Only you, dad or me are allowed to pick her up. And she wouldn’t go with anyone else, would she?” you ask, not sure if it was directed more to your mom or yourself, trying to get a grasp of the situation as quickly as possible. 
As your mom goes to explain, you’ve already put the phone on speaker and found Hotchner from your contacts. Despite the shaking of your hands, you type up a message ‘Call me, asap’. 
“Mom, I need you to stay there. I’ll have someone come over there as soon as possible” you tell her and turn to look towards Morgan and Jennifer who have come to stand beside you, waiting for an order. You grab a post it note and write down the address for the day care: thank god you’ve memorized it from your countless trips there. You’re not sure if your handwriting is readable, but it’ll do and as you hand it over, the agents nod and are already on their way. 
You’ve never been as relieved to see Hotchner’s name pop up on your screen as an upcoming call as you are right now. “Morgan and Jareau are going to be there soon, they will have badges. Only speak to them. I have to go” you don’t wait for her to respond before switching calls. “Where are you?” you ask him immediately, there’s no time for greetings.
A bit baffled by your tone, he responds dryly “Middle of a meeting. What’s wrong?” 
“Ella’s missing” Once you word it out like that, you are starting to realize that this is actually happening. Your little girl is missing; someone else picked her from daycare and she might be in danger. 
The two seconds you wait for him to answer have never felt so long. “I’ll be right there” he says and hangs up the phone. 
Spencer’s stayed next to you until this point. He’s not sure what to do or say, but to be there with you and wait for Hotch to get here. You look at him, desperation written all over you and he looks just as helpless as you feel. Without saying a word, you step back and soon find yourself running towards Hotch’s still empty office. Your thoughts are clouded, nothing seems to make sense at this stage of panic. All you can think about is getting to his office because he will know what to do. 
Once you enter the office, you’re greeted with silence. It’s in neat order, as it always is, but for some reason the order makes you even more on edge. Your mind feels full and cluttered, control is not a word you know right now. And as inviting the couch seems, your nerves don’t let you sit down and all you can do is pace back and forth. 
“Hey” you hear his voice before he even enters the office. His breath was quicker than usual, he rushed to you as fast as he could; a budget meeting could wait. “Tell me what happened” his hand hovers next to your arm, as if he’s ready to catch you and reassure you that he’s really there. 
You try to explain, but only a whimper comes out. You feel yourself crumbling under the panic.
“Here. Please, sit down for a moment” his hand has gently grasped on your arm and he helps you to the couch. You slump down on to the seat and bury your face into your hands. Aaron pulls a chair for himself and comes to sit close to you. His hand rests on your elbow, thumb soothingly running on your arm. He knows time is the most important factor when it comes to cases with kids, but rushing you through this will only hurt more. 
After giving you a few moments to calm your breath, he speaks again “Tell me what happened”. 
“My mom went to pick up Ella from the daycare” you sniffle, looking down at your hands “She said she wasn’t there anymore”. 
Calmly and patiently, he asks you all the routine questions he needs for an amber alert. You’ve asked these same questions from parents of missing kids, but you never thought you’d be the one to answer these questions yourself about your own daughter. 
3 years old, you put her hair on braids today, Frozen shirt and blue leggings and her favorite butterfly sneakers. She’s shy, might not respond to strangers, even police officers. 
“I hate having to ask these” Aaron admits silently after you’ve answered the questions for the alert. His soft and compassionate tone and voice are soothing and calming your panic. His presence helps you see things more clearly again and organize your thoughts. “Let me call this in. Just try to breathe, okay?” he says and you nod, promising to try your best. 
It takes him a minute or two to rely the information on, but not for a second does he leave your side. And once he lowers his phone, his attention is back to you. 
“You did so good, okay? Everyone will be on this and we’ll find her, I promise you that. But I need you and I need that brain of yours” you take a deep breath and raise your teary eyes to look up to him. His gaze is warm and it gives you the energy to nod and try to organize your thoughts. “I’m right here with you”. 
His support and presence means more than you could ever put into words. And he knows what to do, he always knows what to do and you would trust your life in his hands. 
“I should be out there looking for her” you raise your voice in frustration but Aaron’s patience doesn’t run out on you. “I should be out there”. 
“Trust me, I know. But Morgan and JJ are at the daycare, Reid and Garcia are making the alert and Rossi is working with the officers. And right now, you and I are going to think this through” he says as calmly as he can, hoping it will help and calm you down as well. 
“Look me in the eye and tell me you wouldn’t be the first one out of that door if it was about Jack” you last out and jump up to your feet and return to pace back and forth. 
Aaron gets up as well from his chair. There’s something else in his expression, something that you don’t recognize while trying to navigate through your own rollercoaster of emotion. 
The sadness and regret in his heart weigh heavy “That’s exactly what I did and it got Jack’s mother killed” you stop your pacing and turn to look at him again. 
You knew that Haley died a few years ago by the Reaper. You’ve read his profile many times, but you don’t know every detail. Was he threatening Jack? But right now it looks like there’s still a lot of guilt in him for what happened and he’s trying to make sure his mistakes aren’t repeated. 
But you look at him with pleading eyes. Only thinking of Ella – and now, Jack being in a similar position before – makes your eyes water. “Then what? What can I do from here?” 
“We need to think back, figure this out. I’m right here with you” he’s standing so close to you again and you just wish to wrap your arms around him and hug him; hope that all of this is just a dream or a result from miscommunication. You nod, not sure what to say. “Who else is allowed to pick Ella up from the daycare?”
First day at the daycare, you remember signing the paperwork and filling different forms for your daughter. Her normal information, like date of birth etc. but also allergies, possible medications. You also had to fill out things like who to contact if something happens and people that are allowed to pick her up, alongside of their contact information. You put up your parents as additional contacts and safe adults to the contract and you tell him that too. 
But it takes you a second to think back to when you dropped her off today “But today” you start and find yourself searching for support from his desk that’s now behind you “when I went to drop her off, I was greeted by a temp”. Aaron can almost hear the speed of your brain as you try to think “There were two teachers sick today, so they were filling in. They must have been the ones to sign her out; they might not have been aware of the contract”. 
“That would mean” Hotch leaves his sentence open ended, trying to help you piece it together. 
“That would mean that Ted picked her up” you gasp and all of the sudden it all starts to make sense. “Because no one would question it if he says he’s Ella’s dad and he’s there to pick her up”. 
“Would Ella go with him? Has she seen him before?” 
“As much as I’d like to say no,” you try to think what your little girl would do. “Ted would find a way to get her to go. And if the temps don’t know Ella-” 
Aaron nods understandingly. She’s only 3 years old and she’s shy. If Ted told her that he’s going to take her to see her mom or something similar, she might go without questioning it. 
“Aaron” you start but the rest of your words die down. But he understands exactly what you’re desperate to hear. 
“We’ll find her. I promise” and you believe him.
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deltaromeo3 · 8 months
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ɴᴏ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀꜱᴛ #3 - Daniel Ricciardo
pairing: Daniel Ricciardo x childhood!bestfriend reader
summary: Finally returning home after a few years, she reunites with her long time bestfriend; the all too famous Formula 1 driver, Daniel Ricciardo. Will things rehash between them or will it take a turn for the worst?
✮ previous chapters: #1 | #2
✮ my ask box is open!
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“Daniel Joseph Ricciardo! Get up and get dressed!” My mom barges into my room, tossing a towel at me.
“Wha-“
“Aunt Mia’s birthday today. Look your best will you?”
Aunt Mia. Oh yeah right… theres gonna be a small gathering between our families. I guess that’s a given since she’s been friends with my mom ever since I was in nappies.
In my groggy state, I got up, showered and got ready. As usual, I put on a party shirt and paired it with denim shorts; my go-to outfit. Everyone was basically ready, they were seated in the living room waiting for me.
“Ready?” My mom asks.
“Yeah.”
★ ★ ★
After leaving McLaren, Daniel had more than enough time on his hands. So, he decides to come back home to spend more time with his family, why not right? Also he much more prefers the peace and quiet over the hustle and bustle of Monaco so he figured this was a win-win.
But at the back of his mind, Daniel knew he didn’t come back home just for that. He came back home in hopes you would be there too. There would have some sort of gathering and your mother would always invite his family. Deep down, he hoped that he would spot you in the crowd somewhere.
As soon as he enters your house, right after greeting your parents, his eyes immediately scans the living room. You weren’t there. But he was still hopeful that you would be somewhere in the backyard, sitting down laughing about something Ella said.
And like always, his feet brings him to the backyard, and his eyes scans all around for you.
He spots your sister chatting away with Ella but to his dismay, you weren’t there. He sighs to himself and shakes his head thinking “why do I even try? It’s the same every fucking time.”
So off he goes, grabbing himself a beer from the esky and sitting down on the steps of the porch, quietly sipping it just like he does every time there’s a gathering. He spots Caleb from afar, waving at him, making his presence known. Caleb waves back and walks over to him, doing the same thing he does; grabbing a beer and sitting down next to Daniel.
“How ya holding up?” He asks.
“What? In life? In general? But eh, i’m good both ways.“
“That’s good to hear. It’s good you’re taking a break. Good on ya, mate.”
Daniel was someone true to himself, if he wasn’t happy, there wasn’t a reason to stay. And McLaren proved just that, that there was no point putting your all into something that made you unhappy. Don’t get me wrong, racing does make him happy, but this was more like a “if you plant a good seed in bad soil, it will affect how it roots and grows.”
“Yeah… I’m happy with my decision. In a better place now.” He sips his beer.
“Staying for long this time?” Caleb asks.
“Maybe. We’ll see,” He takes another sip of his beer.
Caleb laughs, “Well, if you ever change your mind, come ov-“
“Ma! I’ve got the ice. Where should I put it?!” The familiar voice booms through the whole house.
Is that who I think that is? Is that…? Nah, it can’t be. It’s just my mind playing fucking tricks on me.
“In the esky! Down by the porch!”
“Okay!”
Daniel hears a set of footsteps making their way down to the porch. He doesn’t turn his head to look, afraid his suspicions might be right.
What is he gonna say to you after all these years? How should he start a conversation?
Instead, he just keeps sipping on his beer like it’s bottomless, zoned out…more like trying to not pay much attention to the voice he just heard. Her voice. Your voice.
“Goddamn this woman has me doing shit-“
Daniel hears you mutter to yourself. He chuckles, thinking “she hasn’t changed one bit”.
He notices that you were struggling to carry the ice pack when you pass by Caleb and then himself, which you don’t even realise is there, inches away from you.
“Hey, let me help you with that.” Daniel stands up, hands outreached to take the ice pack off of you. You still don’t realise it’s him.
“Are you su-“
You finally look up to the bloke who offered you help. Finally your eyes meet. You knew that voice sounded familiar, even though you hadn’t heard it in a while.
You froze like a deer caught in headlights when you finally face to look up at him.
The ice pack drops to the floor. “Daniel?” Was all you managed to croak out.
Oh how he hated hearing that name.
Daniel? You know how much I hate it when you call me that. So please, it’s Danny… He thought to himself.
For some reason, hearing ‘Daniel’ roll off your tongue hurt way more than McLaren betraying him.
“Y/N.”
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A/N: oof this took me a whiiileee to publish!! life’s been keeping me busy. thank you for the wait! hope you enjoyed this chapter :) as always, feedback (good/bad) is appreciated! <3
🏷️: @zendayabelova @rizzciardo @charlespear
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