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zachsreaderinserts · 3 years

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sleepy boys inc x gn!teen! reader headcannons

trying something new! i like bbs and all, but i wanted to write for other youtubers! lemme know if yall wanna see more content like this lol.

this takes place in a minecraft au!!! also, mentions of bad parenting/abusive parents

wc: 2,319

okay the sleepy boys

chaos incarnated, all of them. you can’t deny it

so, when tommy invites a friend from a local village, at first, everyone else is skeptical. since when has tommy made a friend who didn’t hate him within 20 minutes from all the screaming and insults he spewed?

unlike his friends, phil is more excited than anything. though he isn’t tommy’s dad, he feels like it sometimes, so he really wants to meet this new person who has caught the youngest’s attention

techno is very much not on board. he has a hard time trusting people at first glance and having been friends with tommy for the longest, he knows that tommy readily jumps the gun and attempts to befriend literally anything just because he can

and wilbur? indifferent for the most part. yes, he feels the need to make sure tommy is protected and cared for, but he also recognizes that this situation is out of his hands. the best he can do is hope that their friend isn’t an absolute asshole

so, it’s saturday. all three men are sitting on the couch in phil’s cottage, talking amongst themselves as they wait for tommy to come back. techno makes a joke about murdering them, which leads to phil scolding him about his violent tendencies

“you haven’t even met them yet, techno, what the fuck.”

wilbur is simply adding fuel to the fire, making little remarks here and there and watching the whole thing escalate to phil lecturing the piglin hybrid.

because of this, not one of them had noticed that tommy returned, with his newest friend. they both stopped at the sight of phil in dad mode, tommy considering just turning around and taking his friend as far away as physically possible

too late, since techno’s sixth sense made him whip around and stare at the newcomer. this made phil stop lecturing and wilbur quit giggling long enough for tommy to introduce his friend

after saying their name, the friend lifted their hand shyly, face burning from slight embarrassment. their other hand was latched onto tommy’s, feeling intimidated.

can you blame them? the fucking blood god looks like they wanna skewer them and cook them over a campfire.

tommy took notice of their shyness and cleared his throat, “we were planning on going to the carnival in their village if you three assholes feel like tagging along.”

like there was any way they were gonna let tommy and his friend go out without chaperones.

tommy turned back to his friend, “give me a second, i’m gonna go grab my sword just in case.” and proceeded to run up the stairs and towards the guest bedroom in phil’s house that he claimed.

the millisecond he was out of earshot, techno grabbed his friend by the front of the shirt.

“what are your intentions with tommy?”

the friend blinked once, twice, then bit back a smile. “you’re asking that as if i’m about to date that motherfucker.”

this time, it was wilbur who bit back a grin of his own. who would’ve expected the originally shy kid to have replied like that????

techno’s brain short circuited and his grip on their shirt loosened slightly. did.... did this kid just brush off his question???

“can you put me down? you’re gonna stretch my shirt.”

techno’s brain blinked back into focus and he gripped the kid’s shirt harder, shoving them against the nearest wall. “i asked a question, kid.”

“you know, tommy told me something like this would happen. i’m glad i came prepared.” and then, tommy’s friend sucked in a deep breath. techno leaned back, expecting the worst...

“MWISTER TECHNWOBWADE, PWEASE PUT MWE DOWN BEFWORE I SCWEAM”

oh god, this was far worse than anything he thought of.

he dropped the teen out of disgust more than anything, reeling backwards. if there was one thing that haunted his dreams, it was uwu-speak.

phil started howling of laughter, clutching his stomach and hunching over. originally he was going to stop techno from threatening a literal child but this outcome was so much better than anything he was anticipating

wilbur was no better, already tearing up from how hard he was snickering. he started choking on his own spit at one point, smacking his arm against the couch.

tommy was so fucking confused when he came back down the stairs, seeing the mayhem that was, for once, not caused by him. he glanced at his friend, who had the world’s biggest shiteating grin.

yeah, they were gonna fit in just fine.

and they did! phil took them under his wing (both physically and metaphorically) and allowed them to come visit his home whenever they wished. and whenever they did, phil was the first to ask how they’ve been and what they were up to

to phil’s surprise, the kid was overall calm in their choice of activities. things like playing soccer or drawing or figuring out how to learn instruments in their free time. it seemed like they were desperate to get their hands on anything and everything just to learn

he found it funny, though, when their chaotic side shone through. they easily were on tommy’s level when they got into that headspace and it was so hilarious to him.

his favorite memory of the kid was when they walked into the house and marched right up to where techno was reading idly in the corner. planting their hands on their hips, they spoke.

“if you were to fuck a clone of yourself, would it be masturbation or would you be considered gay?”

phil, who was washing the dishes six feet away from them, just about crumbled into a ball on the floor from how hard he was laughing and sobbing.

of all questions, that was the one that came out.

but he had no idea that the chaos was a coping mechanism. he just thought they were naturally like that in their free time.

he soon found out the truth when they came home with tommy, who was cursing up a fit, visibly angry. his friend was slumped over, as if trying to hide themselves from the world

when phil asked what had happened, tommy exploded.

“their fucking dad took all their money from their savings! said he needed it more than them and when they asked for it back, he called them a fucking disappointment! that fucking bitch--”

phil can count very few times when he felt true anger and he can confirm that when tommy had told him what had gone down, he saw red.

but he knew better than to outwardly show it. judging by how hunched over and defeated the kid was, what they needed was a stable support system

so he walked over and shut tommy up with a hand on his shoulder, “why don’t we take the rest of the night to build up that game room you wanted in the basement. i’m sure if we knock it out before techno and wil are supposed to be back, we can all play something like monopoly.”

seeing where phil was headed, tommy nodded and brushed away his anger. he knew that what his friend needed was a serious cheering up. tommy ran towards his guest bedroom, claiming that he was going to find his blocks.

phil crouched in front of the teen, tilting their head up to look him in the eyes. “you’re not a disappointment. you’re an amazing person with a chaotic joke machine going 120 kilos over the speed limit in your head and you are talented. your dad doesn’t know shit about what you’re capable of doing.”

oh boy, the kid’s crying. those are tears, full on tears.

that night was one of the best nights of their life, however. they enjoyed the entire three hour long game of monopoly where they watched the light leave everyone’s eyes. it was funny when wilbur lunged across the table when he landed on a railroad, out for phil’s blood.

speaking of wilbur, he enjoyed every minute in the kid’s presence. they often asked creative and random questions and went along with the abstract jokes he made, the two of them laughing heartily the entire time.

when the kid first mentioned wanting to learn how to play the guitar, he practically burst through the wall of the room next door, breathing heavily and exaggeratedly.

“did someone say guitar”

yeah, he’s feral. that’s canon.

they proceeded to spend the entire day in phil’s garden, each of them equipped with a guitar. despite their outwardly smooth brain and stupid demeanor, the teen was a fast learner and could play the most basic chords by the time the sun was setting.

wilbur’s favorite moment was the first night they met, when they went to the carnival. there was the game where you shoot the water and fill up the balloons and the kid was going head to head against techno and tommy.

it was when techno won that the teen turned to techno with murder in their eyes and spoke in a deadpan tone of voice,

“you’re lucky you won this time, you gentrified mayo monkey.”

wilbur’s jaw dropped, as did techno and phil’s. tommy was already in hysterics, smacking his hand against the counter that held the guns.

needless to say, wilbur found his favorite, not-quite sibling in a heartbeat.

techno was the last to come around with the child. can you blame him? every time he tried to threaten them or had beaten them at something, they would respond in a cryptic threat--

“i’m going to pee your pants if you don’t let me win”

or just brushed him off. without a second thought.

“anyways, i was murdering a chicken the other day, and the fucker had the audacity to ribbit at me.”

to say he was confused was an understatement. he was terrified of the fact that a literal child held so much power and disinterest in things like their own life. so for the first few months, he avoided them.

but he had seen past that when it was around midnight on a weekday. tommy was hanging out with tubbo and ranboo in their village miles away from the area. wilbur was out drinking with schlatt, niki, and fundy, and phil was already asleep.

techno wasn’t too far behind, sitting in front of the fireplace and staring out of the window that showed the front yard. it was only then when he saw the flash of a familiar face and looked closer as the teen walked up to the house quietly. their head was down and they carried a small bag with them.

techno opened the front door with a long creak as they reached the porch steps. it was only when they jumped and looked up in surprise that techno had noticed a deep bruise on their left cheek in the moonlight.

despite the fact that he kept away from them, techno was very protective and territorial of tommy, phil, and wilbur. and since they were attached to the teen, he became protective of them as well.

so all the voices in his head went quiet for a second. before exploding into a mixture of screams and threats, all leading back to protecting the child in front of him.

without thinking, he reached forward and cupped their face for a better view of the bruise. at the warm and soft touch, tears slipped down the kid’s cheeks and they sniffed pathetically.

the voices quickly took a 180, all screaming to take care of them. make them feel better. so, techno led the kid inside and let them spend the night in his room, with them falling asleep on the bed and him falling asleep on the rocking chair in his room.

phil did not hesitate to officially declare himself as the teen’s official father, saying that their biological father was a “little bitch”

now somewhat living with the teen, techno found an appreciation for their quieter moments, when they were reading or simply daydreaming. it was cute, in his eyes. but he also grew to enjoy when they were absolutely feral, especially toward tommy.

his favorite moment with them was when they had gifted tommy a music disc for his birthday. it was sweet and sentimental and tommy just about burst into tears when he saw it.

all of the sappiness quickly vanished when tommy put it into a jukebox.

“FUCK THIS PUSSY, BOY, FUCK. FUCK IT RIGHT, BOY--”

tommy had let out the most terrified scream and it practically engrained itself into techno’s brain. it was the first time he ever laughed at something the teen had done and the teen felt proud of themselves.

and finally, tommy. he was already happy to call himself a friend of the teen’s. they were like peas in a pod, working together.

tommy came to them when his insecurity felt heavy and they came to him whenever their dad’s words got to them. they had a nice system of dependency on one another and neither of them would trade it for the world.

tommy’s favorite moment of being friends with them was during their first birthday living in phil’s house. it was a birthday befitting their personality, with brightly color streamers hung and confetti all over the floor. he knew that they enjoyed it severely and once the cake was cut, the kid turned to phil.

“phil, where’s the big tiddy strippers i requested?”

tommy was GONE

he all but choked on his slice of cake and walked away, shaking his head while trying to stifle his giggles. but when he heard phil’s scream of “WHAT”, he just lost it.

all in all, his friend had made a fine part of the sleepy boys. they were a happy face in an otherwise somewhat bleak and dangerous world. and all four men appreciated it.

#sleepy boys x reader #sleepy bois x reader #sleepy bois inc #sleepy boys inc #sbi x reader #x reader #reader insert #teen! reader #mcyt x reader #minecraft youtubers #minecraft youtubers x reader #dreamsmp x reader

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weepinglevi · 3 years

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whos your favorite fic writer/moots and why? Got any recommendations?

first off: pls know that if you're not listed here it doesn't mean i don't like you or your work, it simply means that i have a pea sized brain. love all of u. keep on writing. i really don't want anyone to feel bad (ask nia, i've been crying to her about it).

secondly: i'm not referring to them as my "favourite" cos i can't pick favourites, never really could. maybe that's why i'm simping for so many aot men at once ahaha.

and last but not least: this is going to be a long post so i'mma do all of us the favour and put it under the cut. i feel very soft today and have been listening to the titanic soundtrack for the better half of my day. bear with me, i'mma shower you with love. go check them out!

CHECK THE DNI TAGS ON THESE BLOGS BEFORE READING OR FOLLOWING, PLEASE!

this is in no particular order.

@kojinnie: my queen of angst. the other half of the princess-duo (i came to the conclusion that we're both princesses, we deserve to hang around in pretty dresses and have the time of our lives). especially dream me home still haunts my dreams. i love how you captured the pain and fear both of them feel. and i kind of view it as the start of our friendship, what with both of us writing about the mission to retake wall maria and you jumping into my dms after the fact. love you, kojin, and i only wish you the best.

@starrynightlys: shield-maiden claire. beautiful, talented, funny claire. i love you and i am so happy to have found you here, i really am. i know i've told you this multiple times but whenever i see you on my dash - either fighting off the floch anon or you posting memes, there's a big fat grin on my face. apart from your absolutely mesmerising presence, there's also one work in particular i always come back to: the beginning of forever. you are my source of happy levi content. when the world turns dark and i want him to be happy, i turn to this fic and to your blog in general. love you and i am dreaming of us listening to some good music in a park sometime soon!

@snkslush: luv! my first tumblr wife! this alone has gotten you a very special place in my heart ahah. i love the energy you have - whenever i see you on my dash i feel happy and it's because of how you interact with others. it's like i've known you since forever because of how easily i can talk to you. and reading your filthy thoughts about connie has set off my connie brainrot more than once ahaha.

your headcanons on how the aot boys react when their s/o tells them they want to be railed and also the follow-up still has me drooling. fucking love them. so accurate as well and i'm a slut for everyone ahha

@aotwrites: my lil sunflower. lil sis, you have no idea how happy you truly make me. i love the lil talks we have and i still remember the message you sent me when you were half-asleep, i always giggle when reading it ahah. just know that if you ever want, you can come up to me and ask me weird stuff lil sisters normally ask their bigger sisters. not that i have any good advice to give, but i have a lot of reaction pics to send!

it's very hard for me to pick out one of your fics to recommend - like i said, i have a problem with choosing favourites. but if i absolutely had to, it'd be all of the stars. cried my way through it. will cry again when i reread it. i cry a lot in general.

@arumiee: mars, i know we haven't talked much but our conversation about nurse!armin yesterday is still running around in my head. i can't wait to read about either armin or eren in scrubs, istg. you're so kind and happy-go-lucky, i usually feel nervous when tagging someone on a post but with you yesterday? no problem at all. you give me a sense of safety ahaha (pls don't think i'm weird, i'm actually not. or, yes, i am but in a good way). your purify me had me wanting to take a bath in holy water after reading it. preferably a bath with eren. i guess we're both headed to hell ahaha

@odmlevis: rizrizrizrizriz. i'm laughing right now because all i think of is our last conversation and it's hard to gather my thoughts whenever my mind goes to eren and reiner. or eren and jean - or jean and connie ahaha. i'll have all of them with me in the middle, pretty please.

but back to topic: your the most hurtful things they'd say to you still has my heart breaking. absolutely broken into pieces. because somehow you managed to put all of my worst fears into it. i don't know why i reread it on the regular (i do know, i'm a sucker for pain). other than that, i'm always so happy when i read your messages and when i see you out and about, making others happy with your lil "someone told me to tell you something"-thing you do so often. you're so precious, lemme smooch you.

@onyxoverride: onyx istg your blog is the place i go to if i am down bad. down bad bad. i know we rarely talk and me saying your blog is the place i take my horniness to might come off as weird but it's the truth. i even have problems with picking a favourite because goddamn they're all so good?? what is your secret? if there's a reason for me to go to hell (other than mars' purify me) it's gonna be because of ocean spit. do i have to elaborate further? eren's titan form is fucking hot and thank you for this delicious meal ahha. i am getting all flustered rn just by looking at the lil pic on top of your fic. i will see myself out now. love u onyx you are cool as hell (and i'm nervous as fuck - you're sitting at the cool kids' table in my head ahah - that's why i am so silent around u)

@1252291: and now to you. connie 2 my sasha. erwin smiths ball whore. twIN FLAME, LIGHT OF MY LIFE. buckle up cos we're in for a wild ride. i was debating whether or not to post every of your fics here, because i love all of them so much. i came up with a better idea tho: here's your masterlist. i will talk about two of your works in particular later on, but first you're gonna have to endure me violently showering you with kisses and love.

i haven't told you this before (shocking, i know) but ever since we started talking, i feel like i have a real-life friend again. i haven't had friends in a while and i am so fucking thankful to have you. i really am. i even told my therapist about you because he asked why i am so happy all of a sudden? newsflash: it's because of you.

usually, it was insomnia keeping me up at night but now it's because i am talking to you. and you have no idea how fucking great it feels to wake up in the morning and feel tired; not because some shitty thoughts kept me awake but because i was talking to a friend. i will forever love you for this. you've been there when i was at one of the darkest and loneliest stages of my life and lit up the fucking room with your personality and humour. thank you for being my light. for giving me the same feeling i have when rewatching lord of the rings. for being you. i will stop now but you know i will keep on loving you on main until i take my last breath.

now to your works. falling in love and stay forever. i think you already knew that these are the ones i hold dearest. i still think about felix and rue. i love felix and rue and my heart hurts when thinking of them. your way with words has characters coming to life and touching your heart in a way i've never experienced before. like i said, it felt like those are my friend who died. my fingers running through levi's hair, trying to make his endless pain go away. i am crying again. thank you for creating this. if you ever find the books you've written (or write a new one) i will buy a copy. or ten. have to have some to give away so i can promote your work.

i love u connie 2 my sasha. i really do.

#not me being soft on main #that's a new one ahah #recs

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gogysglasses · 3 years

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are they meeting up? sapnap, dream and george, i mean? i saw a bunch of people (one person actually) saying things about george probably spending dream's birthday with him? he never said he was traveling to florida, did he? i chose the WORST TIME to join this fandom EVERYTHING is happening and i know NOTHING WHO IS TECHNOBLADE i met quackity when he used to read reddit posts WHAT IS LORE WHATS CC!DREAM help me please give me a summary where do i start who are these people and why is ranboo so much younger than me

Ohhhhhhh anon you sweet summer child. This ask made me laugh actually, it's so chaotic and I'm so sorry. Ok ok where to even begin? Ok I'll start by answering the specific quesitons you asked and maybe hopefully give you some more help ok? ok. there's a lot of information but you'll get a hang of it!!! This could get long so answer is under the cut. Also feel free to message me or send me another ask if you have more questions!

-So everything about george being in florida is mostly a joke/rumor. Sapnap and Dream are roommates right now as of about 6 months ago. George will be moving to Florida eventually, and Dream has said probably sometime this year. People have been speculating about george being in florida for literally a year now, but it hasnt happened. Maybe for his birthday? Maybe??? But dream also said they would tell us when the dream team meetup happens.

-Technoblade is another mcyt (minecraft youtuber) and he's on the dream smp (I hope you know what that is) and is good friends with a lot of those people. His mc skin is a pig wearing a crown :) He's most "famously" known for being super good at minecraft, being part of the sbi (sleepy bois incorporated which is wilbur, technoblade, tommy and philza), and his stuff on the smp. He and Dream had a little competitiveness for a while because they were both so good at minecraft, they had a duel sponsored by Mr Beast, and techno won.

-Lore is basically just the plot/storyline of the dream smp. All of the members of the dream smp play a character of sorts and they’ve written a huge story that everyone is involved in. There’s kind of a “main” storyline with a ton of different side plots along the way. I would start with tommyinnit since a lot of his content follows the main story line and he’s kind of a catalyst for a lot of the plot. Obviously some of the plot doesn't include him, but I would start with that.

-Here is a playlist of 180 youtube videos that contains most of the lore for the server. Not every stream on the smp is considered a “lore” stream. But the style of the smp is based on roleplay. The lore started off as just a bunch of friends goofing off but suddenly L’manburg is created, eret betrays everyone and the sadist makes an animation and it’s a big deal. So they started writing lore, and making a cohesive story. This wiki page is also a good place to start as far as knowing all of the members and their respective characters. I haven’t read the whole thing so idk how accurate it is, but you could spend some time here to figure out the story. Here is a timeline of the different arcs in the story that will probably confuse you more than anything but this is the “lore”:

-cc!dream just stands for content creator dream. People make this distinciton to know whether or not you’re talking about the actual real life person or the character (which is just c!dream). so instead of saying just dream is manipulative (which could be confusing if you don’t know if they’re talking about the person or the character) you say c!dream or cc!dream.

-I wish I knew the answer to the last question. As an older fan I’m often wondering how all of these children are so young and awesome but here we are

I’m more than willing to elaborate on anything here, and answer any other questions. Feel free to message me too :) I didn’t give a summary of the lore because I started to try and it got very very long. If anyone knows of any blogs or posts that have a pretty good summary lemme know so I can link it!! Good luck anon!!!

And assuming this is also you, I’m so sorry I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about so no wonder you’re confused. Is it just fanart? which tag were you looking at? worms????

#the end of this ask absolutely SENT me #ask tag #pleiades explains

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astralaffairs · 4 years

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voltaire to versace 03 | thomas jefferson TEASER

title: voltaire to versace 03 TEASER

pairing: professor!thomas jefferson x reader

words: a lil over 10k

warnings: sex jokes n references again, dolley simping for james again, but probably more this time, implied sex except dolley’s having it instead of mc, maria and angelica are girlfriends, lafayette is basically everyone’s plug for weed so like,, drug references and alcohol references??

desc: from francis bacon to foucault, descartes to dante, your political philosophy seminar doesn’t promise to be a blowout — and yet, one mysterious stranger and a risqué evening later, your burberry-clad professor gives you the feeling it won’t be quite the snoozefest you’d expected.

tags: @lunariasilver @tinywhim @nyxie75 @wreakhavoconmacroissantdiggs @checkurwindow @katierpblogg @cubedtriangle @lunariasilver @lexylovesfandoms @fanfic-addict-98 @stephyra17 @notebookgirl30 @exorcisms-with-elmo @kmsmedine @itshaileyn @honeyand-roses — let me know if you’d like to be tagged in future parts!

"Are you sure I was included in that invite?" Y/N's voice was skeptical as she crossed the green toward Thomas's office. Apparently, Dolley and James had spent their afternoon together, taking a walk through the city. (When Dolley told Y/N that the two-mile loop near the Lincoln Memorial had taken them two hours to walk through, she had a sneaking suspicion walking wasn't all they were doing. Hopefully, they'd at least escaped the watchful eye of our oversized 16th president.)

"Yes, I'm certain you were," Dolley insisted from the other end of the phone's line. "He said it'd be great if I brought you."

"... This sounds suspiciously like a pity invite."

"It isn't a pity invite!" Y/N could hear the indignance in her voice.

"Dolley, why, exactly, would he want me there if it wasn't a pity invite?"

"... Because you're my best friend, and he's decided to make an effort to get to know you better?"

She laughed. "As much as I appreciate this idealized James Madison, I have a feeling it was more to the effect of 'I just saw your roommate and feel obligated to invite her'," Y/N corrected her. "But go to the party without me! Don't let me hold you back from having your fun, alright?"

"Please come? It wouldn't be the same without you." Dolley's voice was high, containing traces of what almost smelled like desperation. "It'll make me much more comfortable to have you along."

Y/N groaned. "So when you and James go make out in the bathroom, I'm supposed to, what, play truth or dare with all the other PhD candidates?"

"Why not?" Dolley's tone was mild, which made Y/N roll her eyes.

"No offense to James's friends, but I'm not sure I want to spend an evening making stunted small talk with them."

"You're such a warm person, though! You'd be quite alright."

"It'd be awkward!"

"Please, Y/N? I'll beg you if that's what it'll take."

She scowled at how soft, forlorn Dolley's voice had become. As far as she was concerned, this was akin to emotional manipulation. "Does it really mean that much to you?"

"Yes. I like him so much."

She sighed. "I'm gonna say yes solely because I have somewhere to be and can't deal with this argument anymore. But you owe me."

Y/N could almost picture Dolley’s sappy smile. “Thank you so much, dear. You’re too good to me.”

"Yeah, yeah, what else is new?" Her words elicited a laugh from Dolley, and Y/N continued, “But you know I’d do pretty much whatever you asked if you asked it in that I’m-about-to-cry voice, so I’m not sure this relationship is healthy for me anymore.”

“Oh, of course; I’m truly a parasite,” Dolley sighed. “Taking you in as my roommate, paying for your ramen — how evil of me.”

“I pay half the rent, and ramen costs fifty cents!” Y/N defended, but the words were lighthearted nonetheless. “Next time you give up five perfectly good hours of a Friday night so that I can get laid, we’ll call it even.”

“Don’t make any calls about Friday just yet. You haven’t even seen James’s friends.” Dolley’s voice was just teasing enough to placate Y/N. “I may not be the only one having some fun.”

“Have you even seen James’s friends?” Y/N asked dubiously, and Dolley’s silence told her all there was to know. “That’s what I thought. He’s an econ student, so it’s probably gonna be about eighty percent entitled rich men attending school on family money.”

“Or they could all be just your type,” Dolley reasoned, but by then, any efforts to talk Y/N out of her convictions were futile. “Tall, hot, and older.”

“First off, I don’t have a type, and second, just because you’re dating an ‘older man’,” — The final two words were said mockingly — “doesn’t mean that his older friends aren’t still douches.”

“I hate to have to be the one to break it to you, but that is absolutely your type.”

“Based on what?”

“That professor of yours?”

“Dolley!” Y/N scowled, turning down the volume on her call just in case some passing pedestrians were notorious gossips with super-hearing. It was certainly possible. “Can you please stop talking about him like that? Don’t make it a thing,” she murmured, jaw tense.

“Oh, we’re well past that, dear,” Dolley said matter-of-factly, and Y/N could only roll her eyes. “But if you’ve agreed to the party, I won’t push my luck.”

“Smart choice,” she muttered bitterly. “Anyway, I’ve gotta go. Talk to you later tonight?”

“Of course.”

With that, she hung up the phone before Dolley could take advantage of her giving mood and start making further outlandish demands, tucking it into her coat pocket as she pushed open the door to Melos Hall. Unfortunately for her, the elevator was broken, and Thomas's office was several flights of stairs above her.

After at least eight long pauses for her to catch her breath, heaving as she leaned against the railing in the stairwell, and three stomach cramps, Y/N knocked on his door. "Anybody home?"

"C'mon in." His voice was soft, muffled through the door, and she opened it to find him all but slumped on his desk, resting his head on his hand as he graded papers he appeared to be rather cross with, and with more of said papers covering the entirety of the desk’s surface (and much of the floor). He glanced up when she entered, and a soft grin split his expression. "Hey, I thought that was you."

"I'm in absolute awe of your pattern-recognition skills, really," she replied, tone dry as she let the door fall shut behind her, and despite the playful smile she wore, Thomas rolled his eyes.

"You actually here for anything, or am I gonna have to kick you out?"

She laughed. "I'm not here to derail your work, I swear." He raised a dubious eyebrow. "I was just stopping by to let you know that, assuming it's still on the table, I'd love the TA position."

"Oh, yeah?" His smile widened almost imperceptibly at her words, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "'M glad to hear it. Could've just shot me an email, though."

She shrugged. "I was headed this way anyway. Figured I may as well stop by."

"I'm not complainin'." She let out a soft huff of laughter at the words, but she could feel heat beginning to creep up the back of her neck. "'S good timing, anyway. Intro to IR just turned in an essay on Kant."

The soft groan she let out only served to amuse him further as she surveyed the wreckage of his office. "That's what all this paper is?" He nodded in confirmation, and she scrunched up her nose. "I'm not sure if I feel worse for the freshmen who had to write them or for you having to read them."

"Well, I should hope it's the freshmen," he said matter-of-factly, sitting back in his chair. The smile he wore was concerningly self-righteous. "'Cause, now, readin' these is your job, too."

Her eyebrows shot up; the dread in her gaze was the furthest thing from contrived. "... Is it too late to rescind my application as a TA?"

He shook his head. "Mm-mm. You're welcome to abandon ship."

She didn't like the satisfaction which grew in his gaze as she weighed her options; they both knew she wasn't considering turning down the position in earnest — that simple fact left Thomas unnecessarily smug. Another beat passed, and she sighed. "You're lucky this is going to look good on my grad school applications."

He laughed. "Sure am. I could use all the help I can get, right now."

"I can see that," she replied, voice laden with amusement at the state of his office.

However, Thomas said nothing more, and she shifted on her feet, uncomfortable with the drawn-out silence. He raised an expectant eyebrow, and it took her a moment to grasp his intention. "Wait... d'you mean, like, right now?"

"Unless you're busy." He shrugged. His gaze was hopeful as she eyed warily the small stack of papers she'd spent the past few minutes trying not to crush under her boot. She sighed.

He grinned when she bent over to pick up the papers that'd floated to her side of the desk. "As depressing as it feels to say, I've got nowhere else to be on this fine Friday night."

"That's the spirit." He winked, and though she rolled her eyes, her amused smile was deep-set. "So, you're gradin' for accuracy and watchin' out for grammar, of course, but the points are really earned for analysis. The paper's on changes in the international system. They’ve gotta connect ‘em back to Kant's maxims."

She let out a low whistle as she took a seat across from him, plucking a red pen from his cup and dropping her bag onto the floor. "That certainly sounds pretentious."

He laughed lightly. "You really tellin' me you didn't have to do anything like this as a freshman?"

"Oh, I wish I could say that, but unfortunately, my professor was apparently every bit the pseudointellectual you are.” She nodded sadly, and Thomas rolled his eyes.

"Hilarious, sweetheart, really." In the dry sarcasm of his tone, the casual pet name didn't seem to register with him, but Y/N couldn't help but notice, and her breath caught. "Here, lemme get you a copy of the rubric. 'S nothin' too complicated; go easy on 'em. Got some STEM majors in the class who're just takin' it for the graduation requirement, so I'm not expectin' much."

She pursed her lips. "Are the essays that bad?"

He deadpanned as he turned back to her, sliding the rubric across the desk. "At least as bad as I'm makin' 'em sound."

Y/N let out a long, dramatic huff, rubbing her temples, and Thomas looked thoroughly entertained at her reaction.

"I'm in for a long few months, aren't I?"

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dnvrsmedia · 4 years

Text

You Feel Safe?

Carol Danvers x reader

summary: You and Carol are sent on a mission together for the first time.

warnings: none! good ole fluff! mutual pinning & my fav troupe the “only one bed” :)

AN: IM BACK! I am SO sorry i’ve been gone for like 2 weeks, but I had the WORST writers block omg! Hopefully this gets me back in the time of everything & I hope y’all enjoy! as always requests are open!

part 2

You were called to be on a mission yesterday. If it were any other day you wouldn’t have minded so much, but it was supposed to be your first weekend off in almost a month. You could almost taste the short lived freedom as you stepped into your room that friday evening, but of course, the world had other plans for you. The literal moment you set your bags down,friday informs you that steve needs you in the debrief room.

Obviously pissed off that you were robbed of your planned relaxing weekend, you trot to the debrief room with heavy steps and a frown. You’re known as the cheerful one around the compound. You’re always worried about others safety and health. So, when you passed Nat on the way to meet Steve without saying hello, she immediately knew something was off. Not wanting to interrupt you, she shrugs it off and makes sure to make a mental note to ask you what’s wrong later on.

You finally reach the debrief room and see a familiar tall blonde talking to Steve. You’ve only met Carol about two times, but you wouldn’t really call that a formal meeting. The two of you were too busy trying to save the world from thanos to really indulge in a conversation. But that doesn’t matter right now.

“Stevie, you know I love you, but why the ever loving fuck are you calling me on my weekend off. You know I haven’t gotten one in a while!” You exclaim as you go in to hug him. Steve has also been away on a mission for a while, so you haven’t seen your older brother figure in a while.

He gives out a hardy chuckle and gives you a tight squeeze before letting go. “I know y/n and I feel horrible doing so, but you’re the only gal for the job. Plus, you haven’t properly met Captain Danvers over here yet!” He points to Carol as she sticks out her hand to shake.

“Please, call me Carol.” She winks. You shake her hand as your face burns bright red. God y/n keep it together! You can’t help but to stare at her beautiful being. Everything about her is absolutely gorgeous and you can’t seem to get enough. Your eyes trail down to her strong biceps. All all you can think about is how much you wouldn’t mind if she put you in a choke hold i mean-

Steve clears his throat and asks you if you heard a word he just said. Now you start to blush profusely. She had to notice you staring, because she’s sporting a wicked smirk on her face.

“S-sorry I got a little uh...distracted.” You clear your throat. You notice Steve rolling his eyes and continues to debrief the mission. The both of you were to go undercover as girlfriends to a ball. This wasn’t any ordinary ball though. At the ball, there is an underground auction on alien tech. The reason you were picked and not Nat is because you can turn invisible. Once invisible, you were to sneak into the auction and take back that very valuable piece of tech. Carol is tagging along because of her extensive knowledge on alien tech. This mission was clearly meant for the two of you.

Soon after, you were dismissed to your quarters and packing for the three day long mission in Tuscany, Italy. Luckily for you since you don’t own many dresses, Nat popped by to let you borrow a few. She originally came by to see why you were so upset, but as soon as she saw you packing your bags she already knew.

“So, are you excited to play girlfriend with miss twinkle hands? Last time you two met you could barely take your eyes off oh her.” She slyly smirks as she folds your shirt. You immediately scoff as your face starts to heat up.

“I was just making sure she didn’t die! I do that every time with everyone when we’re saving the world!” You squeak. Nat could definitely tell that you were lying. I mean come on, she’s a highly skilled spy. She just mutters a ‘yeah sure’ and rolls her eyes. You shoo her away so you could ‘get your beauty sleep’ before you leave for the mission. Moments after you finally get settled in bed, you hear a knock at your door. Too tired to get up, you ask friday to let whoever is at the door in. Soon later, you’re eye to eye with Carol herself.

“Oh were you about to sleep? I’m sorry I can go if you want.” She shyly smiles and starts to walk away. You’ve never seen Carol like this before, and you wish you could see more of her.

“No,” you sit up and pat the space next to you on the bed. “It’s okay I promise. Come sit.” You gently smile. Soon after your smile is taken over by a big yawn. You hear Carol chuckle and sit next to you.

“You sure you aren’t gonna fall alseep on me, y/n?” She teased.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” You lazily smiled. “Now, why did you want to see me?” you questioned.

“I just uh wanted to get to know you better. I mean if you’re gonna be my girlfriend, then I should actually know you, right?” she answered. You blushed majorly at her calling you her girlfriend. Yes, you know it’s only for the mission, but you can’t help but feel giddy.

“Well, what do you want to know? I’m an open book.” you replied while looking into her eyes. You could get lost in her perfect chestnut eyes. You can tell that she is a strong and loving person, but she also has been hurt. You wish you could take her pain away, but sadly that’s not how it always works.

From then on, the two of you spent your last hours before the flight to Tuscany talking about anything and everything. You told her things you don’t even think you’ve told Nat or Steve yet. Just something about Carol makes you want to pour your deepest darkest feelings and thoughts out. She’s just so welcoming and warm. You do end up falling asleep due to the day of hard work you endured. Carol soon notices and covers you in your blanket before leaving. The two of you have about four hours before the flight and she still hadn’t packed. She leaves your room with the widest smile on her face.

You wake up two hours later to your alarm. You always set your alarms according to, so you don’t get behind schedule. Before missions, you like to get a light workout and combat in. You groggily get up from your bed and change into your workout clothes.

You get down to the gym and immediately notice Carol at the punching bag. She was wearing a black sports bra with matching athletic leggings and hair was in a pony tail. You are completely in awe. Of course you’ve seen her fight before, but that was in a life or death matter. You didn’t have time to gawk at the way her back muscles contracted every time she moves. Or hear the little grunts she huffs out as her fist collides with the punching bag.

She must’ve felt someone staring at her, because she turns around in the middle of punching the bag and smirks. Your face seems to permanently be red because of her, but you couldn’t really complain could you?

You shake your head and get straight into your workout routine. You turn on your favorite playlist and get straight to work. You get in light stretching before you do your 2 miles on the treadmill. You hit the weights right after. Throughout your whole workout, the both of you share stole glances. You catch her looking at your ass through the mirror as you back squat and chuckle. You’re just about to bench press as she walks up to your station.

“Here, lemme spot you. I don’t need the bar falling on your pretty face.” She smirks and steps behind the you.

“How nice of you, Captain. You know, I’m a lot stronger than I look. Trust me, I’m a big girl.” Now it’s your time to watch as her face gets red.

“Oh trust me I know. You can never be too cautious.” She winks and you playfully roll your eyes.

About an hour after, you finally finish your work out. You thank Carol once again and go on your way to your room to take a quick shower before meeting her at the quinjet. You say bye to your fellow avengers (well who’s not on a mission), and go on your marry way to Tuscany. The both of you arrive in Tuscany at 8pm. You were visibly tired, so you couldn’t wait to eat something and curl up in your own bed.

Carol helps you with you bag, although you said you can cary it, and takes the both of you to the room. The view from the room is astounding. Your eyes pan all over the room, then you see it. To your surprise, there is only one bed and a very uncomfortable looking couch. You can tell Carol notices as well as she starts to put her things by the couch.

“You can take the bed, trust me I don’t mind.” She smiles her adorable smile.

“Are you kidding me? We’re both adults here, Captain. We can share the bed and I’m not letting you say no! That couch looks so uncomfortable!” You rant as you move your things over to the bed. “Now, what do you want for dinner?” You turn your head to see he smiling at you.

The pair of you decided on some authentic Italian food for take out. So here you are, currently eating fancy Italian food with a beautiful girl in romantic Italy. Seriously what could get better than this. You guys talk for hours until it’s time to go to bed.

You’re the first one to freshen up in the bathroom before bed. You step out in only your towel, and Carols face heats up so quick.

“I-I’ll just go uh go in there uh I uh- yeah.” She mutters out as she grabs her things and rushes herself into the bathroom. You laugh to yourself then get dressed. You snuggle up in the bed with one of your books and start reading. You finish a chapter when you hear Carol get out the bathroom. You’ve never seen her look so casual before. You can’t help but smile at her Captain america pj pants.

“Steve gave em to me as a gag gift for my birthday last year.” she chuckled and gets into bed with you.

You put your book down and turn on the TV to entertain the two of you. The TV was nearly there for background noise, since you weren’t paying attention at all. You say there thinking about how happy you’ve felt around Carol for the past two days, and hoped she felt the same. A loud lawn broke your trace. You realized it’s getting late, so you turned off the TV and got comfy in the bed.

“Sleep well, Y/n.” You hear Carol say as you’re about to drift into sleep.

“Goodnight, Carol.” You day softly as you nod off into the dream state.

beep! beep! beep!

Your overly loud, yet useful, alarm wakes you up. You go to reach to turn it off but you can’t reach it. You look down and see a sleeping Carol lying on top of you. Her arm is wrapped around your waist as hair is strewn across her face. You smile down at her and admire how soft she looks. You take your free hand and move her fly aways from her face. She stirs awake and looks into your eyes. She throws herself back and starts to apologize profusely.

“Hey, hey, look it’s okay I uh actually enjoyed it. If we’re being honest I haven’t slept that well in a long time.” You blush as you look down at your hands. Carol soon takes your hands and gently caresses them with her own.

“I haven’t slept that well in a while either actually. I normally get nightmares, but with you...” She whispers.

“You feel safe?” You ask as she nods her head with a smile. “That’s exactly how I feel too.” You beam.

Carol scoots closer to you and places her palm on your cheek. You heart begins to race as she slowly inches forward to kiss you. Just as your lips are about to touch, your alarm blares once more and the two of you bump heads.

“I should probably turn that off.” You groan.

“Yeah,” She chuckles “You should.”

#captain marvel x female reader #carol danvers x you #carol danvers x reader #carol x reader #femxfem #gxg imagine #captain marvel x reader #marvel x you #nat x reader #natasha fluff #natasha fic #carol fic #mcu x reader #carol danvers #steve #steve x reader #steve rogers

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vosiro · 4 years

Text

Hot girl shit (SMUT)

Dabi x F!reader (NSFW/PWP)

Basically y’all was at the cookout fucking shit up then went to the club and fucked shit up then went home a fucked shit up this shit just pure filth ngl

Also I didn’t proof read all of it so if you see a mistake, you didnt😃❤️

Today was the day, you were finally finna introduce dabi to ya family at the cookout. You already knew the first rule, don’t. Bring. A. Random. To. The. Cookout. Nobody knew who dabi was, and ole dude looked like walking beef jerky. Fair to say, you were scared as every morsel of the FUCK, because you know them aunties and cousins be talking mad shit for no damn reason. Dabi seemed way more relaxed than you did, honestly, a little too relaxed. “Shiiii doll, you’re so tense and for what?” He smirked “you need some dick to calm you down baby? I’d be down to fuck right here...” He said as he grabbed your waist. “Can you have some fucking tact? I just KNOW they finna eat you up as soon as you walk in the damn back yard.” you snarled as you pulled his hand from your waist. “I know you’re not catching an attitude with me y/n... keep that same energy when you’re screaming my name tonight doll.” You and dabi haven’t had sex for over three weeks, because of y’all’s schedule. You could tell he was a little, ahem... pent up.

“We’re here.” You told him as you two walked into the back yard. Immediately all eyes was turned on you and ya boyfriend. All the little kids ran up to dabi, “are you a zombie?” They asked “y’all don’t be asking them dumb ass questions.” You snapped back. “Maybe I am a zombie...” dabi said as he growled at them. You laughed, but that smile faded as you saw Stephanie, candy, and Alexis. They be the main ones talking shit for absolutely no reason. “Girlllll you see y/n’s man?” Stephanie whispered “right, what kinda extraterrestrial ass being” candy giggled. “Y’all know she always go for the crazy niggas, lemme go talk to her and see what’s up...” Alexis said as she appropached you and your boyfriend. Dabi shrugged these comments off, he was used to this type shit, but you were fuming. “Girllll you can do so much better, it’s the beef jerky skin fa me.” She muttered “Girl and it’s the stiff ass wig fa me, if you don’t get tf miss concrete lace🙄” You snapped back. “Dammnnn baby, you ate that.” Dabi chuckled as y’all walked away to go greet the rest of the family.

Overall, the cookout went well. Your family was pretty accepting of dabi despite his appearance, he looked like he really loved you, and was willing to protect you. He helped your uncle out on the grill with his flames, and played freeze tag with ya little cousins. Your grandma was forcing dabi to get another plate because he was ‘too skinny’, and he did exactly that even though he was full, because he adored your grandma.

Red nose by Sage the Gemini came on, and you already knew what that meant. Time. To. Throw. It. Tf. Back. Dabi was in the backyard with his shirt off, cuz it was hot asf in this bitch. The same cousins that were talking shit were the same ones eyeing him tf down like he was some sort of meal. You peeped this, and decided to make them regret they ever said shit. You came up to your mans, and did what you had to do. Throw that ass all up on him, and you already KNOW he caught that shit. Y’all was lowkey messy with it, your booty was all up on him and his hand were on your lower back swerving tf outta that shit. You felt something poke in between your ass, and you knew it couldn’t just be his belt buckle because dabi is ahem... above average. Ah, he was hard. Really hard. Who knew he would get all bricked up from you throwing it back on him. He leaned down and whispered in your ear, while his hands rested on ur hips, “shiiiiitt baby, you got a guest room in this house we could sneak off to doll face? I wanna fuck you real good...” to say you were just wet from his words was definitely an understatement, since you two haven’t had any action lately, you were literally turned on from just looking at him. “Yea we do, but haven’t you been pent up for the past couple of weeks? You sure you’re not finna nut when you put the tip in?” You said teasingly. “Don’t play with me y/n, or that pretty throat of yours is gonna be stuffed with my cock.” The tone of his voice was nearly feral, it’s not like you could say no anyways, and you wanted it as bad as he did.

You led dabi by hand to the guest bedroom of your childhood home. Once you locked the door you turned around, and that mf stuck his tongue right down your throat. “Don’t ever catch an attitude with me again, okay slut?” he said as he pulled away. “Or what? What are you gon do?” You knew your words would entice the exact reaction you wanted from him. Dabi smirked as he sat on the edge of the bed. “C’mere dollface... And get on your fucking knees.” You did exactly what he told you to. You undid his belt and freed his dick. That shit was throbbing and leaking pre cum at the tip. You grabbed a hold of it and he let out a small groan. You started to stroke it up and down while licking the tip. “Fuuckkk baby... yea... mm just like that... be a good girl for me and suck this cock real good ok?” He managed to get out under his low groans. You took half of his length in your mouth and began sucking. Dabi threw his head back while his hands rested behind him, gripping the sheets. “Fuck fuck fuck fuckkk... mm..cmon, I know you can take all of it you fucking slut...” you were going at a frustratingly slow pace for dabi, it was taking all his willpower not to grab your head and slam his cock down your throat. He pulled your head off his dick and stood up. Dabi grabbed your chin with his forefingers and stuck his thumb in your mouth then twirled it around your tongue. “You were doing that on purpose weren’t you? You fucking bitch... open wide.” You gagged as he stuck his entire length down your down your throat. He started thrusting at an inhuman pace, while his hands made its way to the back of your head. “When... fuck...nngh.. when I say don’t... haa... when I say don’t catch an attitude... with me...FUCK.. don’t catch a fucking attitude... alright?... mm fuck...” just as he was about to cum, someone knocked at the door and you quickly pulled off of him “shit.” You said fixing your clothes and heading to answer the door. It was Alexis. “Y/n, girl, wtf are y’all doing in here? Granny said y’all had to come and get more food.” Alexis knew EXACTLY what she was interrupting. “Uhm fuck, we’ll be down there in a minute... just give us a second, we leaving soon anyways” you sighed.

Y/n - “Let’s go dabi.”

Dabi - “What the fuck? You’re not just gonna leave me like this.”

Y/n - “I don’t have a choice baby, it’s granny, never play with granny’s time.”

Dabi - “Y/n you’re really pissing me the fuck off.”

Y/n - “Okay? and I don’t give a fuck, now tuck your dick in your pants or sum.”

Dabi - “Are you fucking dumb? I can’t hide this shit.”

Y/n - “Well try to baby, please for me”

Dabi - “Fuck, whatever let’s just go home.”

You and your boyfriend said goodbye to everyone at the cookout after grabbing one last plate. Dabi was clearly pissed, and honestly, you had more than enough time to finish him off, but you loved making him mad because that angry sex always hit different. As you two reached your shared apartment, dabi did not hesitate to pick you up and and carry you to the bedroom, roughly slamming you on the bed and letting his tongue explore your mouth. He slide his hands into your pants and felt your dripping essence through your panties. “You were talking all that shit and you were this wet doll? Just from sucking me off? You realize how much of a fucking whore you are right?” You moaned at his words. “Fuck... w-wait dabi, I wanna go somewhere tonight.”

Dabi - “Hm? We can go after you cum on daddy’s dick doll.”

Y/n - “Nooo, we have to go right now if we want the entree fee to be cheaper.”

Dabi - “Entree fee? Where the fuck do you wanna go?”

Y/n. - “Club Jurmane. please baby please can we go, I’ll do whatever you want when we get home”

Dabi - “Club Jurmane? That ghetto ass club on Sukazoki Avenue?

Y/n - “yes that club”

Dabi- “Fine, go get dressed and let’s go”

Even tho he was pissed at you and still semi-hard, he could never say no to you. Honestly, you’re the only person he’s loved in a really long fucking time.

Dabi was waiting on the couch in black jeans and a turtle neck with a chain as you walked outside the bedroom in a small, thin, and short red dress. “You look like a fucking stripper” was the first thing that came out of his mouth, and “..but it’s sexy dollface.” Was the second “that’s what I thought baby~ now let’s gooo”

9:45- at club Jurmane

You two walked in and it smelled like ass, weed, and Hennessy. Strippers were dancing on the poles, dollar bills were scattered across the floor, everyone was shit faced, the music was bussin, and you were ready to get turnt tf up with your boo. “Baby let’s get some drinks at the bar~” you said as you ushered your boyfriend to take a few shots with you. You two were a little drunk before y’all even had any fun fr. You turned to your dabi and he was holding a blunt in his hand, clearly corssfaded.

Y/n - “Boy where in the fuck did yo ass get a blunt from”

Dabi - “Some random gave it to me, wanna hit babe?”

Y/n - “You shouldn’t accept drugs from strangers... gimme that shit🙄”

You smoked the rest of the blunt and now yo ass was cross faded too. Dabi grabbed your hand and dragged you to the dance floor. Your back was to his, “show me what that ass do dollface” and you did just that. No hands by Waka Flocka was playing, and yo ass was pressed up all on Dabi’s dick, and he was hard as shit. Sum about his girl shaking ass on him just got his spirit going, AND he’s been waiting to bust a nut all damn day.

Dabi - “hey y/n let’s go somewhere private okay doll?”

Y/n - “whatttt c’mon let’s dance a little mo-”

??? - “hey y/n! It’s been so long how are you”

Dabi - “who the fuck are you?”

Y/n - “keigo? Is that you? DAMN you’ve changed, ya know being number 2 hero n all”

Hawks - “I know, you’ve changed a lot too since highschool, still fine as hell tho. By the way, call me hawks in public.”

Dabi - “Yea she is, she’s also my girl”

Hawks - “ah I see... anyways y/n wanna dance? Maybe talk and catch up. You don’t have to though, I know sometimes dancing with your ex can be a little uncomfortable.”

Dabi - “nah, she won’t be danc-”

Y/n - “sure! I mean why tf not. It’s only uncomfortable if we make it.”

And with that, you and hawks were dancing, hanging out, talking, and lowkey flirting. Did you know what you were doing? Yes, yes you fucking did. Don’t get me wrong, you absolutely loved dabi with all your heart, and had no feelings for hawks whatsoever, but you just loved to see that possessive and jealous side of your boyfriend. While mid conversation with hawks, you felt a firm grip on your wrist. “What the fuck do you think your doing doll?” Dabi said through gritted teeth. “what am I not allowed to talk to another person with a dick?” You snapped back. “Not when he’s your ex, and he’s clearly tryna make a move on you. Get the fuck up, we’re leaving.” your boyfriend literally picked you up, and flung you over his shoulder. “Dabi what in the actual fuck, if you don’t put me tf down.” He kicked open the club bathroom door and brought you into a stall.

Dabi - “Turn around and put your hands on the toilet tank.”

Y/n - “No wtf that shit dirty as a bitch”

Dabi grabbed your neck and brought himself to your ear “can’t you just be a good girl for daddy? Huh doll? I’m dying to fuck you..” you turned around and listened to what your boyfriend said. “Good girl...” he said as you heard him unbuckle his belt. His hands brought up your dress and pulled your panties down to the middle of your thighs. He rubbed his fingers along your folds. “Did you get this wet from talking to that fucking bird huh?” You whimpered and shook your head no “o-only for you daddy...” he took his member out of his jeans and slowly sheathed it into your dripping hole. “F-fuuckkkk doll... so damn tight...” he groaned, slowly thrusting into you. He started picking up his pace, giving you them hard, fast, deep, thrusts. “Aah.. fuck.. can’t believe you made me...mm.. wait all day for this pussy doll.” Your mind was going hazy, and your moans were getting uncontrollably loud. “D-dabi, what if someone- aah.. what if someone comes.. haa.. comes inside.” You barely managed to get your words out. Dabi landed a sharp smack on your ass “let them...let them hear who’s making you feel this fucking good dollface.” His words made you clamped around his dick. “Fuck yeaaa... you like that shit? You like when I talk to you like a fucking slut?” You kept getting wetter and wetter. “Y-yes daddy!” Yo ass YELLED that shit. Dabi smacked your ass once more, “cum for daddy doll, show me how fucking good you feel.” He then spread ur ass cheeks out, and slipped his thumb into your tight puckered hole “A-ah Dabi... wtf” you yelled. “You think... fuck... my dick... mm... could fit in here dollface?” He managed to say under his groans. You could tell he was close from the way his dick was twitching inside of you. “F-fuck... I don’t know dabi.” You could feel your orgasm creeping up on you, and you started to clench around him. “Shii.. are you close slut? C’mon cum, cum for daddy..” you came exactly when he told you to while yelling his name. He didn’t stop though, he kept ramming into you even after your orgasm hit, making you shake from the overstimulation. Dabi’s thrusts became erratic, you could tell he was about to cum. “F-Fuck... doll... nngh I’m gonna cum... fuck fuck FUCK.. I’m...cumming...” he gripped ur hips tightly as he came. You felt his hands heat up slightly as he moaned, releasing his thick, creamy cum inside you. Dabi pulled out, but he was still hard. “W-why are you still hard...” you said as you tried to get up. He smacked your ass hard asf “get back down slut, I’m not done with you.” Dabi used his cum from your pussy to lube up your asshole, you whined at the feeling of his fingers violating ur tigh hole. He spread your ass cheeks out and started teasing your hole with the tip of his dick. “W-wait you cant just put your dick in like that-” you felt dabi push the tip in, and you instinctively tried to push it out because of the unfamiliar feeling. “Fuck- dabi that fucking hurts.”

Dabi - “If you don’t relax it’s gonna hurt even more doll..”

Dabi pushed the rest of his member into you ass, and it reached deep inside you. “Fuuckkk... you. Look at you.. my pretty little cum sleeve. You say it hurts but you’re squeezing me so. Damn. Tight. I’m gonna cum again doll..” tears started to stream down your face from the mixture of pain and pleasure you were feeling. “Aw, look at my pretty slut crying, you like this shit don’t you? You like feeling my dick reach deep inside... you’d bend over for that short ass winged bastard again like the fucking whore you are wouldn’t you?” You shook your head no, barely being able to form a coherent sentence. “Fuck doll... your pretty, little, tight ass feels so fucking good.” He groaned, picking up the paste of his thrusts. It still fucking hurt but you liked the balance of the pain mixed in with the pleasure. His thrust became erratic again, he was about to cum for the second time tonight. “Don’t c-cum inside.”

“Huh? If I want to cum in your ass, I’ll come in your ass. Don’t tell me what the fuck to do.”

You felt Dabi’s hot cum fill up your ass, while his deck left your anus. He used his finger to scoop back and cum that dripped out of your holes and put them back inside. He pulled up your panties, and pulled your dress back down then smacked your ass once more “make sure you keep my cum inside you like a good girl? Mmk babe?”

Y/n - “It’s gonna drip down my fucking leg..”

Dabi - “Good.”

When you and dabi walked out the bathroom hawks immediately ran up to you and your boyfriend, taking note of your disheveled dress, teary face, and limp.

Hawks - “y/n what the hell happened? Are you okay?!”

Y/n - “I-I’m okay fr.”

Hawks - “what the fuck did you do to her?”

Dabi - “none of your fucking business Tory Lanez.”

Hawks took note of the white substance dripping down your leg. He put two and two together, and realized what actually just happened in that bathroom.

Hawks - “dude.. your fucking disgusting you know that? y/n deserves better than you.”

Dabi - “oh yea? And you ain’t even 5 feet yet so wassup?”

Dabi started to close the distance between him and hawks, blue flames escaping his hands.

Y/n - “dabi dont-”

Dabi - “nah since his bum ass seems to know everything about our relationship, lemme run his shit up.”

Hawks - “I mean you can fucking try it, fuck I look like losing to a walking piece of beef jerky”

Y/n - “BOTH OF YALL CALM TF DOWN. Hawks don’t come for MY mfing man and Dabi you’re doing way too much let’s just go home okay baby?”

Dabi & hawks - “fine...”

You and dabi reached y’all’s shared apartment, and made way to the bedroom, both of you on the bed.

Dabi - “You shoulda let me beat his ass”

Y/n - “Boyyyy, I wanted to, but I didn’t wanna get my my membership revoked, or the popo pulling up.”

Dabi - “Whatever you shouldn’t have hung out with him, or even let him touch you anyways.”

Y/n - “Awww was my little baby jealous?”

Dabi - “Yes I was fucking jealous. You’re mine.”

Y/n - “As I should be, period”

Dabi - “PeRiOd”

Y/n - “Don’t mock me-”

Dabi - “Hey doll.. you said you’d do anything if we went to that dumb club right?”

Y/n - “Yea... watchu tryna do?”

Dabi - “Stay here doll.”

Dabi left the bedroom and returned with some red rope.

Dabi - “Strip.”

Y/n - “What? Don’t tell me you wanna go again. We fucked twice already and I’m sore as fuck, lets just go to bed.”

Dabi - “I said strip.”

Y/n - “Make me, daddy.”

He grabbed your throat squeezing just enough to make you slightly light headed. “Can you stop acting like a slut for just one second, and do what I fucking say?” He let go of your throat, and you stripped head to toe. “Get back on the bed doll face.” Dabi took your hands above your head and tied them to the headboard. He then took each of your ankles, spread your legs out as far as they could go, and tied each of your feet to the headboard as well. He went into the closet and brought out a vibrating dildo.

Y/n - “so you’re just finna tease me with a dildo that vibrates? Whewww, scary, shiver me timbers...”

Dabi- “patience, baby...by the way the safe word is pumpkin.”

He sat on the bed and brought his face right up next to your pussy. His cum was still leaking out both your holes. He stuck out his tongue and licked your booty hole all the way up to the top of your throbbing clit. “D-dabi-” You whimpered out. “Our juices taste good mixed together doll.” He took the dildo and put the setting on low before slowly sliding it into your cum filled hole. Dabi got up off the bed and started walking towards the door.

Y/n - “Dabi what the fuck? You just finna leave?”

Dabi - “I’ll be back in a few, be patient and wait for daddy, alright?”

—————————30 minutes later————————

you heard the bedroom door creak open, it was dabi and he had a giant box... of sex toys. There was every possible adult toy in there you can imagine. Dildos, vibrators, anal beads, butt plugs, you name it. He put the box on the floor, and sat at th edge of the bed where you where all tied up at. Honestly, at this point you were worn out and tired, ready to pass tf out, but dabi didn’t finish having his fun with you yet.

Y/n - “dabi p-please take it out... I want your dick not this toy...”

Dabi - “did you cum?”

Y/n - “no.. the vibrations were too low..”

Dabi - “good... you’ll only cum when I tell you to, alright?”

Y/n - “and if I don’t?”

Dabi - “You’ll be punished of course.”

Dabi crawled onto the bed and put his crotch level headed with your mouth. He unbuckled and unzipped his pants freeing his cock. There was already Pre-cum leaking from the tip and he smothered it all over your face. “Suck.” He said with a stern voice. You shook your head, “no.” Dabi slapped you across the face, leaving a sharp, stinging, sensation behind. “You’re not in a position to deny me doll.” Honestly, that slap hurt so fucking good. You opened your mouth obediently, as he slipped his cock into your mouth while his hands rested on the headboard. He thrusted into your mouth so roughly and deeply you could feel that shit go up and down your throat, you were gagging all teary eyed. “Fuck yea... you suck my dick so good...” dabi groaned as he threw his back. “Shit, baby... yea keep sucking... ima cum soon..” he thrusted into your mouth a few more times before shooting hot spurts of his cum down ya throat. He pulled out and tucked his cock back into his pants before reaching under the bed and grabbing his pistol. “Since you sucked me off like a good fucking slut, lemme reward you baby.” He said as he teased your wet folds with his gun. “I know yo ass is NOT about to shove a gun up me.” You were scared but lowkey curious as to how it felt “relaaax, I cleaned it before hand, trust me baby. I know how to make you feel good. Don’t you dare cum on it though, you only cum on my cock.” Dabi pushed the head of the gun in your dripping cunt slowly. The cold rigged feeling of the metal felt so fucking good against your tight walls. You let out a moan and tried to arch your back best you could under your restraints. “F-fuck dabi..” you let out a shaky moan. “You like that shit? Fuckkk baby, you’re just swallowing that gun up huh? Does it feel better than my cock? You would take anything up this pretty little pussy wouldn’t you slut?” He started to fuck you with the gun rough and hard. You were about to cum from the gun plus the 30 minutes of low-dildo vibrations you received. You felt your orgasm crashing down on you as you moaned loudly. “You really came from that y/n? I thought I told you not to cum unless on my cock you dirty bitch.” Dabi pulled the gun out of you, covered in your juices and his cum.

Y/n - “what the fuck was I suppose to do? I couldn’t hold that shit it.”

Dabi - “I’ll have to punish you for that doll.”

Dabi untied your hands and feet from the headboard he sat at the edge of the bed and signaled for you to come lay on his lap. “Lay on your stomach doll, ass out.” You did exactly that, he had you on your stomach layed out for him. You felt his hand come down and land a sharp, hard smack on your ass. “Count them”

Dabi - “That was one.”

He landed another smack

Y/n - “t-two”

And another

Y/n - “ah! T-three”

Another

Y/n - “four-”

And one last spank

Y/n - “f-five.”

Dabi - “if you come without my permission one more time it’ll be another five spanks, got it doll?”

Y/n - “yes daddy...”

Dabi - “good girl.”

You sat up and straddled Dabi’s waist, wrapping your legs around him. He reached down into the box and grabbed a vibrating butt plug. Dabi lifted you up and started walking towards the door “where the fuck are we going now?” You asked as he carried you out of the room. “To the bathroom baby, I want you to see how slutty you look when I fuck you.” When you two reached the bathroom he set you down in front of the sink with your back turned to his front. You let your arms rest on the bathroom counter, and bent down for him to have easy access. He pulled out his semi-hard cock and lazily jerked it a few times before rubbing the tip along ur folds. He slid in with one quick thrust, and you moaned loudly. “Shit..No matter how hard I... fuck you... you’re always... so.. fuck haa.. so damn t-tight. Shit.” Your head was buried in your arms as dabi thrusted into you. He grabbed your neck and made you look in the mirror as he railed you senseless. “Fuck doll.. look how pretty you are taking my cock like this. My good fucking girl.” He stuck his fingers in your mouth to lube them up, then brough them down to your asshole. He slid his fingers in and out of your puckered hole to make sure it was wet enough. He grabbed the butt plug and sheathed it into your ass, turning the vibration all the way up. “F-fuck dabi, it’s too m-much, I can’t take it-”

“You can and you will.”

He fuck you so roughly yo could hardly think, let alone make coherent sentences “tell me how fucking good I make you feel. Who’s the only one that has you screaming like this baby.” You really wanted to answer him but all you was able to let out was a slurred “nnn”

“Aww, did I fuck you stupid y/n? Fuck you so good you can’t even talk anymore? My pretty little dumb slut.” His words had you squeezing him tightly, bringing on another orgasm. You felt his dick twitching in you as well. “C’mon y/n cum for me baby, cum on daddy’s dick, I know you have another one in you.” you came at the same time as him. Your tight walls milking his straining cock.

Y/n - “baby...we done? So tired...”

Dabi - “fuck are you talking about? We’re going all night.”

Dabi fucked you over every flat surface in that apartment. The kitchen counter, the living room couch, over tha damn balcony (which was terrify, yo ass almost fell over the ledge), even on the floor.

It was currently 3:29 A.M. in the morning, and you were riding dabi while your hands were handcuffed to your back. He had a glass of whiskey in one hand, and a cigarette in the other. “Yea... bounce in my dick just like that...mm... feels so fucking good.” He finished the rest of his whiskey, and put the glass down on the bedside table so he could rest his hand on your thigh. He grinned and spit in your face as you continued to bounce up and down on his cock. His saliva traveled down to your mouth and you licked that shit tf up. Dabi took his cigarette and put it out on your thigh

Y/n - “H-hurts”

Dabi - “you like it.”

Y/n - “...”

You felt yet another orgasm come up on you, but this time it felt different. Your head felt fuzzy and you body weak. Once you came you vision went blurry and you fainted onto Dabi’s chest.

Dabi - “oh shit.”

—————————————10:30 A.M.————————————

You slowly open to your face being nuzzled in Dabi’s chest

Dabi - “you’re finally awake doll”

Y/n - “what the fuck happened”

Dabi - “you passed out”

Y/n - “how could you fuck someone till they passed ou- ow my entire body fucking hurts, dabi what the fuck?, can you fucking calm down next time?”

Dabi - “you were the one who made me pissed”

Y/n - “boy bye... it wasn’t even that deep.”

Dabi - “not you tried to be on some hot girl summer shit...”

Y/n - “MOVE.”

#dabi x black!reader #bnha x reader #bnha x black!reader #dabi smut #bnha smut #dabi x reader #my writing #fanfic #anime #anime fanfiction #mha dabi #mha fanfiction #mha x reader #dabi my hero academia #dabi is a todoroki #bnha touya #smut #18+

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georgeluzwarmhugs · 4 years

Text

I just got tagged in the sweetest positivity post so im gonna make my own and feel free to send me an ask with other accounts that you love or want to get to know better or anything positive. ANY RUDENESS WILL BE DELETED SO DONT EVEN TRY OR I WILL END YOU. ok lets get started:) 💛

@wexhappyxfew

shannon where do i even startttt you are one of the sweetest people i have ever met and you make anyone smile that you can. you really are a sunflower, your personality really shows that. you are so supportive of me and my writing and i get so happy to see messages or updates or anything from you. you’re such a kind soul and you were one of my first friends in this community. i swear i’m gonna read all of your fics, long and short, eventually. i love you so much honey thank you for everything🥺

@hellitwasyoufirstsergeant

ANGELICA!! your writing is incredible i can’t believe i am so blessed to be on your taglist and read your works of art😄 you are so amazing in every way. i love our convos so much, some one make us a damn deck of cards. you are my baby and always will be, forever. the picture you use for your babe pics is *chefs kiss* his face is priceless. you are my biggest fan too, i love youuuuu💙

@liebegott

gianaaaaaaa my love i dont even know what to say. everything you make or write or contribute too is i m m a c u l a t e. i mean i listen to your playlists almost every single day. and your fics dont even get me started. i havent even read all the multi-chapter imagines but your writing is just truly indescribable. your way with words is amazing. you truly inspire me to grow and improve each day. and yes you may be turning into a fan page of me👀 i love you so much g, my queen❤️

@damngoodgirl

you are so sweet butttttt our private conversations would make people concerned. your cannibalism and my freaky side do be coming out around each other. our throuple with joe is one of the only things keeping me alive right now. unholy trinity *debby ryan smirk* love ya girl💖

@floydtab

VERED you are one of my favorite people and i know you’re taking a break or whatever but i still love you no matter what. you were my 5th follower and ever since we have been such good friends. you’re an og for being in the snap group chat and the chat on here, even though you left it, which is perfectly fine of course. it’s no surprise your tag list is so long, your writing is absolutely wonderful. and your name is so cute🥺 i love you forever baby

@alienoresimagines

even though we’ve never interacted you are still so nice and read my writing. You are such a lovely person and thank you for taking the time to read my imagines🖤

@band-of-bitches

jillian you are so freaking amazing and i knew we would be friends from when i got my very first ship from you. i still look back to your wisdom tooth video lmaoooo you are so pretty too omg and we can both relate to curly hair problems i’ve had your post notifications on since i first followed you. anywayssssss i love you💜

@speirs-sexy-ass

JACE you’re my mother and istg you are the workout QUEEN (i know you have to but still) oh by the way you are so so gorgeous and one of my best online friends. your bf is gonna have to keep fighting me for your attention and i’m so proud of you for graduating and 200 followers! i’m gonna give you bday gift just wait and see;) i love you more don’t fight me on this.💚

@stressedinadress

amy i know we don’t talk much but your aesthetic makes me swoon and you are such a wonderful person. your princes for band of brothers are so accurate you are so creative. hehe just know i care about you💗

@lucky-strikes-8

all i gotta say is your ships are amazing and im always here for you lovey<3

@eugenieroe

soph can i just say you are the vibe QUEEN, and your stories always make me smile. i love here about your work antics and the creepy back room. you are so cute and you always make me laugh with our talks about being soldiers. we can be gay together too, i love you bub🤍

lemme know of anyone you guys appreciate so everyone can have some positive vibes

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godidfk · 4 years

Text

I Don’t Need A Hero (Part Two)

Summary: You don’t like heroes. They were a sham. But when your quirk disappears you are shocked to find you need them more than you thought. One in particular more than others.

Pairing: Eijirou Kirishima x Reader

Warnings: Angst but like? Not really?

Word Count: ~ 3.3K

A/N: okay listen im sorry this took seven years to come out lol. Life is life. I know there’s some confusion on what the readers quirk is but like I promise there will be a more in depth explanation soon. My asks are always open if you have questions!! I hope y’all like this.

I’m gonna tag everyone who asked for part two on the last post! Just in case y’all forgot <3 (if that’s not okay lemme know I’ll untag you)

@lady-bakuhoe @shania-chua @raekah @onegaisobaniite @red-riot-girl642

Part One

“So what happened with Chargebolt?” Once you were both back to your car, you finally felt comfortable enough to ask Molly about what had happened at the meet and greet.

“Oh y/n! Oh, it was absolutely amazing! I kept peeking around the girl in front of me when I got up close, and he totally caught me looking. I was so embarrassed, he just kind of stared at me and I felt like I was on fire. He smiled at me and then he winked and I felt like I would pass out on the spot.” Glancing over, you saw Molly was absolutely glowing. Her hands were flying everywhere to emphasize how excited she was. You chuckled looking at her. “That’s not even the best part though y/n! When I finally got my turn to go up to him, he asked my name and told me I was really cute and asked if I’d stay after so I could talk to him more!” Your jaw dropped as Molly went on. You knew your best friend was drop-dead gorgeous, and the best person in the world. But who would’ve ever guessed her all-time favorite pro would be immediately taken with her?

“Molly! That’s amazing! But... it didn’t take you long to come out and find me after..” realizing what your friend must’ve done you felt a wave of shame and guilt wash over you. “Molly please tell me you waited for him. Please don’t say you left to come find me instead.” The guilty look she threw you made your stomach sink.

“It’s not like that y/n. I did wait. I figured since I sent Red Riot after you that you’d be alright waiting a little longer. I knew you’d kill me if I didn’t wait for him. So I did! But I definitely left quicker than he would’ve liked… BUT guess what!” Before you could get a word out she interrupted you. “Kaminari and I are getting together tomorrow after his patrol! As long as you’re alright that is.” She looked over at you and you could briefly see that worry back there.

“Kaminari huh? Looks like you two got close real fast. I told you he’d love you! And Molly… I’ll be okay. It’s just going to take some time right?” That’s what you were hoping. That your quirk would be back in the morning. Or that you’d figure out what had happened.

“Y/n, you never told me exactly what happened back there. Why can’t you hear anything anymore?”

“It was weird Mol. You know how I hate being deep in the city like that. Around so many people. Their thoughts were so loud. It was starting to become too much. I pushed through though. For a bit. I was determined to be with you when you met him. Although it turns out you didn’t really need my help did you?” Throwing a quick glance over your shoulder you saw her blush. “Anyway, when we got into that line and Chargebolt came out it got so loud. I was about to excuse myself for a moment when… I don’t know. Everything was too much and then I saw him looking at me and all of a sudden… nothing. I totally freaked Mol. The silence was so loud. I felt like I was drowning in it. So I went outside. And then that stupid hero tried to come to my rescue. Who does he think he is anyway? He doesn’t know me. What could he possibly do to help?”

“Wait back up, are you telling me when you looked at Red Riot it all went silent?” Molly was staring at you with her eyebrow quirked.

“Yes. That is exactly what I’m telling you. What’s your point?”

“Well, that seems… sort of like something you would read in a romance novel doesn’t it? Young pretty girl looks at hot young man and all the voices in her head go silent? Sounds kind of dreamy to me.” Glancing over at her, you noticed she was wiggling her eyebrows at you.

“Molly this is serious! My quirk is straight-up gone and all you can think about is some dumb fantasy? Even if it was some weird ‘hey this guy is your soulmate’ kind of thing you know me better than that. Never a hero. Never. But that’s beside the point! Molly, it’s gone and I can’t hear what anybody is thinking now. As nice as it is to get some peace for once in my life my spatial awareness is so fucked up. Normally I can tell when people are close to me without seeing them. Some asshole back there slammed into me and knocked me down and I didn’t even know he was there until I was on the ground. I have no idea what’s wrong with me and I’m scared, Molly.” She had gone silent beside you. The drive back to your house felt like it was taking years instead of an hour.

“I’m sorry y/n. You’re right. I should be taking this seriously. We’ll figure this out. Do you want to go see a doctor? Maybe they’ll be able to find something wrong?”

“Molly if I went to a doctor I’d be a guinea pig. Have you ever heard of someone’s quirk disappearing? Because I haven’t. I’ll figure this out. I’ll be okay. I couldn’t control my quirk very well anyway, right? Who needs it.” But the truth was you were terrified. You felt wrong. Empty. The quiet was so loud.

-----------------------------------------------------

It had been a week since then. As much as you were hoping your quirk would be there when you woke up. It wasn’t. Everything was still quiet. If you were being honest though, after the first few days of being absolutely terrified and feeling helpless and empty, you were starting to enjoy the quiet. It was nice to hear the birds all of the time instead of only when you were 100% alone. Getting used to having to pay attention to your surroundings had been a challenge. And your job performance was taking a severe hit. Having to wait for people to actually tell you their order before you could start making it made things take a bit longer than you’d like. You were about to start getting ready for work when your phone rang. Walking over to pick it up from the counter you saw Molly’s contact picture and answered.

“Y/n! Are you busy right now?”

“Actually yeah. I was just about to get ready for my shift at the cafe, why?”

“Oh dangit. Kaminari is coming over today and I was hoping you would come meet him.” Molly had been talking to the pro hero every day since meeting him. She practically saw him every day too. You knew it was only a matter of time before she wanted to introduce you two. You were thankful to have work as an excuse to put it off. As much as you loved her, you weren’t ready to try and befriend a pro hero.

“I’m sorry Mol. We’ll meet eventually I’m sure. I have to go get ready now but have fun! Don’t get zapped.” You heard her start laughing as you hung up.

----------------------------------------------------

A few hours into your shift things started to slow down. You relished the time when the cafe was empty. It gave you a chance to catch up but also admire the view outside. The little cafe you worked at was on the outskirts of the city. Right across from a nature park that was empty more often than not. You loved to look out at the trees and flowers when you got the chance. It’s where you spent your lunch breaks too. Which you decided to do right now. Telling your coworker to man the front, you grabbed your lunch and crossed the street. Laying under your favorite tree you decided to try and figure out what had made your quirk disappear. This had become a daily thing. Taking about 30 minutes to try and piece it together and then pretending it didn’t exist the rest of the time. It had become the best way for you to manage it. Unfortunately, you weren’t any closer to an answer as you were when it happened. You were running out of theories.

Thirty minutes passed by and you slammed shut your notebook and headed back to the cafe frustrated. You didn’t particularly notice the customers who were in the shop as you went into the back and put your things away.

“Hey! I’m back from lunch if you want to go take your break!” Your coworker was smiling at you just a little too widely for your liking and you cursed your quirk for disappearing. “Why are you looking at me like that? Is there something on my face?”

“No there’s nothing on your face. You didn’t tell me you knew Red Riot!” You felt heat rush to your cheeks. How did your coworker even know you had met Red Riot?

“What are you even talking about? I met him last week and promptly told him to leave me alone. I don’t really consider that knowing someone. How did you even know about that?”

“Well if that’s the case, it looks like someone doesn’t know how to listen. I’m gonna go on my break but I expect all the details when I get back!” She wiggled her eyebrows at you as she pushed past you into the back room. Why did what she said make your stomach do a flip? Peeking around the corner into the shop you caught a glimpse of someone sitting right at the counter. He was drinking coffee and looking at his phone, occasionally looking around. His red hair was spiked up the same way it had been when you had met. But he wasn’t wearing his hero costume. Just a normal t-shirt. He looked surprisingly more human this way. Why the hell was her here though? No pros came to this shop. Favoring the fancier shops in the city. You weren’t complaining about that though. You preferred the quiet nature of this place. Taking a deep breath you walked out to the counter. He looked up as you walked out and his face lit up. His smile was bright. It reminded you of the sun. Shaking your head you tried to rid your mind of any thoughts about him other than what he was doing here.

“So what, pro heroes are stalkers now?” You cringed internally at how rash that had sounded. He may be a hero but he didn’t deserve immediate cruelty. His smile dropped off his face for a moment before turning into a smaller smirk.

“Denki told me the coffee here was really good, and that you made it the best. So here I am.” His smile grew a little wider as he spoke. You noticed his teeth were pointed and looked razor-sharp. Like a shark.

“Well, that’s amusing considering I’ve never met him and he most certainly hasn’t been here while I was working.” He furrowed his eyebrows at that. Before he could think too much on it you had a realization and interrupted him.

“How did he tell you? Was it in person?” He looked up at you, clearly confused.

“No, he texted me an hour ago, why?”

“Molly… that asshole. She’s been with him all day. I’d be willing to bet it was her not him. She isn’t particularly happy with me for the way I treated you last week.” You looked at him apologetically.

“Well, that’s okay. You were obviously going through something. Even if it wasn’t Denki, the coffee here is definitely worth it. Why isn’t this place more popular?” You chuckled at that.

“You think that coffee is good? Molly wasn’t lying. We do it pretty well here, but I make it best. What’s your order, I’ll make you another.” He smiled at you and told you his order. You quickly went about making it. Catching him smiling as he watched you from the other side of the counter. You were going to kill Molly later. But for the moment you completely forgot he was a hero. Just enjoying that bright smile. You placed his coffee in front of him and watched as he tipped it back. He closed his eyes for a moment before he spoke.

“That is on a whole different level than the one the other girl gave me. How did you do that?” He was staring at you with wide eyes. You laughed at the face he was making.

“I guess I’m just that good. I’ve been doing this for a while, you tend to pick up on little things after time.” You smiled as he took another, longer drink. He looked happy. He looked up at you and caught you smiling.

“That looks good on you you know. You have a really nice smile. I’m glad I finally got to see it.” Heat rushed to your cheeks as he looked to you. Thankfully at that moment a customer came in and walked up to the counter. You cleared your throat and internally begged your face to cool down.

“Hi! What can I get for you?” You recognized the customer, but you didn’t remember his name.

“You have to ask? Thought you had everyone’s orders memorized by now. You usually start on it right as I walk in. Are you alright?” You felt guilty for having to lie to him. He wasn’t the first customer to ask though. So you automatically launched into the story you had made up to tell them all.

“I’m sorry! I was in an accident last week and I’ve been having some memory issues ever since. I’m sure I’ll get back into it quickly! Just have to relearn everyone’s order.” You saw Red Riot look up at you and furrow his brow when you said that. You silently prayed he wouldn’t ask you about it.

“I’m sorry! I’m sure you’ll get back into it in a jiffy. You’re everyone’s favorite barista for a reason!” Your heart warmed a little at the praise. You gave a small smile to the customer.

“So what can I get for you? And this is super embarrassing after all of that praise, but I’m afraid the memory loss may have also caused me to forget your name.” The customer quirked an eyebrow at that. You had never really had to remember anything about your customers. Whenever they came in they were always thinking about their orders, so you heard them fresh every day. You had always heard their names before they said them too. Why would you take the time to remember it when the information was always immediately available to you? You missed this aspect of your quirk. Not being able to hear what everyone was thinking all of the time had its downfalls.

“The name is Everett. I’ll have a double espresso please.” You immediately started making his drink as quickly as possible, hoping to make up for your lack of quirk. Behind you, you heard a very audible gasp.

“Are you Red Riot? The pro hero?” Hearing the redhead chuckle you felt your heart drop. You had let yourself forget for a moment that he was a hero. All of the nice things he had said to you began to feel like a dagger in your chest. You would never allow yourself to befriend a hero. Finishing Everetts drink you turned and went to hand it to him and saw he was now deep in conversation with the pro. You weren’t listening to the conversation. You didn’t care to hear about the nonsense heroes and their fans talk about.

“Here you go Everett. Hope it makes up for all of my issues.” You smiled at him and went to turn around to clean the counter when you heard him say your name.

“Doesn’t y/n make the best coffee? I’m not surprised that a pro finally made their way to this place. It’s amazing it has stayed as quiet as it has this long.” Red Riot smiled and looked up at you.

“The coffee is absolutely amazing. It’s like a dream. I have a feeling I’ll be here pretty often.” Your heart sank even further and you frowned. Turning to clean up your station, determined not to turn back around unless you absolutely had to. You heard the bell at the door and glanced over to see Everett leaving.

“What happened to you last week?” You closed your eyes and sighed.

“That’s none of your business Red Riot.” You said it harshly. More harshly than you meant to. But you were hurt. Why would the world bless a hero with a smile as bright as that?

“Please call me Kirishima. Everyone else calls me by my hero name. It’d be nice if you didn’t. And look I know last week is obviously a sensitive subject, but if it was bad enough that you’re having memory issues you should’ve let me help you. What if I could’ve prevented it?” Your entire body immediately felt like it had been lit on fire as the anger flooded your veins. You turned and gave him a look that could kill. A look filled with cold, seething rage.

“I do not need some hero to help me. My life is none of your business. Leave.” He looked taken aback by your words.

“Why do you say it like that? Like it’s a bad thing? It’s okay to need help y/n. Everyone does.” You hated the way that your heart melted when he said your name. But much bigger than that you hated that he was a hero. You hated every word he said. You felt your body getting hotter when you heard the bell ring and heard Molly’s laughter coming in. She looked at you and it immediately halted. She ran behind the counter and looked from you to Red Riot. She pushed her way in front of you and grabbed your face.

“Y/n. Y/n go home. Now. I’ve got the counter. Go.” Looking at her, she seemed to be the only real thing for a moment. Her words sank into your mind and you turned and left the shop without a word.

----------------------------------------

Molly sighed as she watched you walk out. Thanking God she had convinced Denki to come to the shop. He was standing by the door still looking incredibly confused. Kirishima was staring out the door too.

“I should have known better than to tell you to come here Kirishima. I’m sorry.” Molly put her head in her hands. Denki walked up to the counter quickly.

“You alright babe? What the hell just happened? She looked ready to kill someone. What did you say to piss her off Kiri?” Denki was looking from Molly to Kirishima.

“I didn’t really say anything. She told a customer she was in an accident last week and that she was having memory problems. When he left I asked why she wouldn’t let me help her last week. And she just. She got so mad.” Kirishima looked back at the door. Molly sighed again.

“Listen. It’s not my story to tell. Short and simple of it, y/n doesn’t like heroes. She hates the whole premise of you guys. Something major happened at the event. Don’t ask me about it. It’s really not up to me to tell you. I’ve only seen her with that look one time before though… I’m just glad I got here when I did.” Molly had flashbacks to that night. Seeing your face then, seeing it now. It was too close. Way too close. Denki cleared his throat.

“Do you even know how to make coffee?” Molly looked up at him confused. Realization set in and she laughed.

“Denki I started here at the same time y/n did. We bought this place together. Even if it is just hers now. I’ve got the counter handled.” Both men looked up at you.

“Wait you guys own this shop?” Kirishima looked around the place again as she continued to laugh.

“It was always y/n’s dream to own her own cafe. Let’s just say dear old dad would do anything to keep me quiet about certain things. So I got her this place! It’s a long story. But when your dad’s a rich asshole there’s really only one benefit.” Denki raised an eyebrow at her.

“Babe you’re so hot.”

“Oh my god, Denki. Not here.” Molly was laughing again. But she saw the way Kirishima was looking down at his cup. She pitied him. If only he hadn’t been a hero.

#kirishima eijiro x reader #kirishima x reader #kirishima x y/n #kirishima x you #eijirou kirishima #mha #my hero academia #bnha fanficiton #bnha x reader #boku no hero academia #bnha kirishima #mha kirishima #mha x reader #kirishima is best boy #idnah

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selfcareparker · 3 years

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LMAOO I WAS GONNA BRING UP FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLIDER BUT I WASNT SURE IF YOU WERE WATCHING IT HSKAJ (are you liking it? i know it’s only the first episode but ya know, another one tomorrow night- well tomorrow night for me, and did you like wandavision?? i loved it!!)

oh my goodness i’m watching lion king while writing this and i haven’t seen it in a while and i am..... emotional. but anyway, i love that streaming services think that imma pay for them while they charge $50 a month. like yes of course i have that kind of money and i am going to give it to you to watch tv 🙄 that $50 is budgeted to sims thank you. (ALSO SIMS!!! i’ll get to that in a minute) now see if i don’t google levidia right this minute LMAOO, not that i’m gonna use it.. just for the research...

AND HDKSHS SEND THAT CHAOS WALKING LINK LMAO i saw it for the third time with a different one of my friends and she wasn’t the best one to see it with? she literally was on her fucking phone and i was like ok whatever her loss not mine, and idk if you’ve read the books or if you’ve seen it by now, but by the end of the whole movie, after they’ve confirmed THE THING throughout the whole movie she asked the dumbest question and i’m like diD YOU NOT WATCH THE MOVIE, and i guess she didn’t. so. this sounds so vague but i don’t wanna spoil the movie for you just in case lol.

THE STORY LMAOO, so A DIFFERENT FRIEND LOL, like my oldest bff, we had a day together and we wanted to go see chaos walking. and i honest to God thought that no one would be seeing this movie. like NO ONE. every day, i checked the theater seating and no one was there right? plus i really wanted us to have the theater to ourselves. so we sit in the wrong seats, the row in front of us, STILL THINKING WE’RE ALONE. and then these 3 older people came in AND IM ABOUT TO SCREAM FHSJSH AND IM LIKE “are we in your seats?” and they we were like uh yeah, AND IT WAS SO BAD LMAOO , we’re moving and everything would’ve been FINE but my friend’s reclined seat was going down so slow and as it’s going shes LITERALLY SAYING ALOUD “awkward awkward awkward” so she thinks forget it, lemme just get up. HER BAG GETS CAUGHT ON HER CHAIR AND HER FRIES AND THEY SPILL ALONG WITH HER HONEY MUSTARD 😭😭 ALL OVER THE FLOOR! so i’m trying not to laugh lmao but those aren’t even our seats and we just made a mess, so naturally, i get on the floor and start cleaning it up with my napkins (this is going for too long) AND MY FRIEND IS STILL SAYING “awkward awkward awkward awkward” and i’m really abt to crack up bECAUSE LIKE SHUT UP HAHAHA and we’re cleaning it and shit and the oldest lady is gonna say “yeah you’re not gonna make an old lady get on the floor, are you?” AND I WANTED TO LAUGH AND SCREAM AT THE SAME TIME BC DID WE ASK YOU TO, NO, so then i had to get the manager and she helped us clean it, we got new fries and everything was fine, it’s just a crazy story bc LITERALLY WE COULDVE AVOIDED IT AND EVERYTHING BUT THESE ELDERLY PEOPLE HAD TO COME AND SEE THIS MOVIE😭😭 at least the gentlemen was nice.. he helped us clean. but then his wife was like “i aM nOt siTTiNg tHeRe” and at first i thought she was a teenager bc of her stink attitude but her husband was nice. and it’s not like we weren’t cleaning it up, we were!!! like i was so apologetic- anyway.

about sims! do you play console or pc? wait,, you already told me you play pc bc your computer was broken, i’m glad you can play now though :’)) litetally when i read in the tags that you’re playing sims !!!! and are you hyped for bunk beds? i have cc so i’ve had them for a bit, but they were glitchy... but i’m so excited we have them now! i should really play sims today...

GURL IM SO PROUD OF YOU 🥺🥲 i know you aren’t fluent in everything and you aren’t a linguistic genius LMAO but it’s still soooo amazing :’) here i am reading the captions while ur just going hahah, yea i tried duolingo but.... i didn’t stick to it HDJSH talking to you though makes me so interested because you know all these languages, not even studying them like that, but you have this foundation and ahh it’s just super cool. LOL YOU DONT SOUND LAME HAJA IM TELLING YOU ITS SO SO COOL, i’m loving this lesson btw oh my goodness- HSKAJS YOU THOUGHT I WOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT??? HDYSJHS MY ONLY ENGLISH SPEAKING ASS??? HAHAHAHHAH i find that word (Rindfleischetikettie- i’m not gonna write the whole thing i’m sorry) very interesting... like... wow. did you have to google that or did you just know lmao

OKAH THE WATER THING HDKDJDKS UR GONNA TERRIFY ME HAHAH OH MY LORD- first of all CROATIA 😍😍 but thinking about it like that, I WOULD FREAK OUT TOO HAHSGSG i never go that deep into the water, or if i do i have my dad with me lol and i kind of hold onto him bc ive seen/heard too many things about people being dragged into the sea. but i loveee the water (i wanted to be a mermaid soooo bad ohmigosh)

I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW ONE CANNOT LIKE MUSIC ITS AWFUL !! lmao yeah i haven’t even listened to harry’s his first album, everyone says they love it more. I WAS GONNA SAY IMMA LISTEN TO ONLY ANGEL BUT THE WAY YOU DESCRIBE IT HUHAHAH also i have never listened to anything by mgk (i actually had to google who he was IM SORRY😔) i’m tempted to listen tho lol PLEASE JUSTIN BIEBER- I PROMISE IM NOT LAUGHING AT U IVE JUSY NEVER HAD SOMEONE SAY THAT B4!! like i don’t know many people who’ve liked him bUT NOW IM GONNA LISTEN & the cardboard cutout- okay. 😭😭😭

oh my goodness to see the vamps live 🤧 TO SEE ANYONE LIVE PLEASE JJDGSHAHGD and little mix is so good oh my goodness- i actually haven’t been to that many concerts.. i was at my first one, elsie fest (it’s like a broadway thing really) in uhhh october of 2019, yea i took my mom for her birthday bc she loves darren criss and i’m obsessed with glee lmao OH MY GOODNESS YOUVE BEEN TO SO MANY!!! and those are such great artists 😩😩

LMAO UR FINE, hamilton is a musical that lin manuel miranda wrote and i think generally made? i’m obsessed, but basically it was on broadway and then recorded and put on disney+ ... idk i guess it counts a film bc it’s like a movie really cuz it was recorded but in what 2018 or 2016? i don’t remembers the date that is on disney+ but it’s strange how i got into it, a lot of my friends were obsessed and i was like uhh why? and while researching it and watching it, trying to figure out why people love it... i fell in love with it LMAO but the music is FANTASTIC and lin is incredible😭 but yes yes yes i loveeeee high school musical!! my dad actually took my cousins to see it on ice or something (i absolutely forget lmao) but i don’t know how people don’t know hsm. it upsets me.

OKAY IM DOWN TO THE BOTTOM HAHAHA (it takes me so long to respond, now i’m on lion king 2 WHICH IS SO GOOD PLEASE FHHSSHHSHSH) i could respond in chunks but i kind of enjoy responding like this? it feels a bit like a letter but if this whole thing is overwhelming i’ll cut it up lol

+ yes that was me about your fic and sleep and everything lol but it was so good😭 i don’t understand how you write peter so well like you have this ability to capture his.. everything? i’m crine. all the time. over your fics. & i cannot describe my happiness for youuuu :’) i’m so happy you’re writing again 🥺🥰 the thing about how you only want to write the long peter fic but you don’t know how to continue... i feel that so so so hard, i don’t think i told you but ughh i was so blah bc of that feeling of having pent up inspiration for only one fucking thing and not being able to write it. it’s so frustrating 😭

not to add more to this but i need to vent a bit? the situation is definitely different bc with your major it obviously requires for you to ya know, know english lol, but uhm bc i’m homeschooled ive been cheating on all my work SHSHDHSJ like i google the answers but i’m still learning! it’s just..... i find it so unnecessary, like going for an audition no one is gonna say to me “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” like tf??? there’s literally no point. i’m gonna be getting into voice lessons again soon and i’m already doing dance, AND i’ll be doing this summer camp program (more hamilton lol) and thinking about school is only making me stress more, like i haven’t been able to rehearse dance at all this week bc of it...... so

hahaha reading your tags, lonely anon would still be accurate HAHAHHAHA // another add: yea i love ur current theme, i’ve gotten used to “seeing you” like this, but anything will look super pretty :)) ALSO HOW IS IT STILL SNOWING THERE, i swear it’s getting warmer and warmer by the day here 😭🤧

these long ass posts, my gosh🥲 lonely lovely anon <3

Omg yes it does feel like a letter sldkdj and then the few days of waiting also make more sense okay i love this ❣️💕❤️💓❤️💞🧡💜💘(wtf)sksjhz

Dear lovely anon,

ALSKSJVKD yes i‘m liking falcon and winter soldier dlkdh i haven‘t watched the second episode yet but i‘ll watch it tomorrow! but i didn‘t watch wandavision........ eidislskks i was going to but idk i wasn‘t that interested in it and watching series is already too much of a commitment (what can i say i‘m a Sagittarius—🤧 (no i’m joking i actually know NOTHING about starsigns)) didjj that i couldn‘t force myself to watch it, ALSO i hate (idk if this is an unpopular opinion) when every episode is like a whole hour. i‘m rewatching an old series today (it‘s german so i won‘t even get into it) and the episodes are 25 mins each and i‘ve already watched 8 episodes today ridlndjdjd,,, and i feel like if the episodes were an hour each i wouldn‘t have gotten past episode 2 today like idk.... even if series had the same length in total, i prefer when the individual episodes are shorter idk why tho tbh (so yeah i already wasn‘t 100% convinced about watching wandavision so i just couldn’t make myself watch a bunch of 1hour episodes— i‘ve heard that it‘s good tho- but i‘m not much of a series person so. Dldkk (have we talked about this already??? sorry i don‘t remember what i said lol and i couldn‘t find my own post anymore so dkdjsh) (WAIT I JUST CHECKED THE WANDAVISION EPIOSRDES ARENT EVEN THAT LONG??? Okay wait i might watch it now - did you like it? let me know if i should watch it— why did i think they were 60minutes???)

okay another confession i‘ve never watched the lion king????? i mean i watched it when i was a child but i was too young to actually pay attention to any kind of plot i just liked the songs lol sldkdj i‘ve been meaning to watch it for years tho 🦁 (idk it just felt appropriate to put a lion emoji lmoaoo)

OH MY GOD THE CHAIS WALKING/CINEMA STORY AHSJSKKS😭😭😭😭 NOOOOO (very fitting that there was so much chaos when you were watching a film that has chaos in the title loool) and the “awkward awkward awkward“ SAME SKSKSLSKDJ, that‘s literally me 24/7 ahajshshhshshsh. Like i was so skdjdjdkdllsldksnsnsnsb while i read what you sent me djslslsjdjdbdn why are old ladies always so grumpy btw 🥲🥲🥲 at least the man was nice tho! and wait did i read that right... you have fries (which, to me, are called chips dusuusldk) at your cinemas?? (Movie theatres sorry sksjsh) we just have popcorn and nachos and drinks i want chips too when i‘m watching a film what😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

Also i still haven’t watched it so thanks for not spoiling it!!! (idk when i’ll watch it i’m so bad with films and even worse with series💀💀💀- same with cherry. i literally forgot all about cherry, i was SO hyped when the trailer came out like i’ve never been so excited about a movie... and then it came out... and i still haven‘t watch it like what‘s wrong with me???? Dkdjdjdjdklsl i feel like i‘m not gonna watch it anytime soon tbh, but i wanna watch chaos walking i just have to find the time

Okay and @ your other friend who wasn‘t paying attention like why are you even watching the film then???? but ok (omg this sounds so mean i‘m sure she‘s very nice but in this situation just like❔❔❔)

SIMS ahhh, BUNK BEDS, ahhhh sdljdjdjdkdkdldksj i actually haven‘t played it since the update 🤧🤧 i made both of my sims (enisa (bestselling author already, thank you) and michael (aspiring doctor)) go to university and bro it takes so long 😭😭 and you can‘t do anything else if you want them to do well so literally the last three times i played sims i was just constantly clicking their homework and computerd to write their assignments (i play it in german so idk what its called on the sims) and do their presentations and do them all over again so that they get better or whatever for HOURS, but imma play again soon

also i‘m living my fanfiction life loool, so i made my two sims neighbours (on the same plot tho but i made two small separate houses lol, i still wanted to control both of them at the same time but i made sure they didn‘t interact before i wanted them to skdjdjdk). and first they both experimented and got some experience in the love department you know (all genders, cause i have to live my sexuality even in a pc game slskdjh— wait, i‘ve never lived my sexuality irl like i‘ve done NOTHING nothing with guys nothing with girls (🥲) but maybe that’s why i want to do it even more in the sims) and then they met at uni and realised like hey we‘re neighbours and now they‘re together (but michael accidentally had an alien baby with another woman (who was an alien which i was not aware of) cause i wasn‘t paying attention like i said woohoo not try for baby like michael why is your pull out game so weak tf LSHDDHDJDJSKKDKSKDKS okay but making out and flirting and doing all the fun stuff in the sims turns me on way more than it should PFAHAHHAHSH) so idk why i told you this but I’m creating that neighbour!au in the sims lmaoooo

i did not have to google Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsübertragungsaufgabengesetz (just did it again😌 sisjshhs) but i might have mixed up the words überwachung und übertragung or i might have even forgotten a word skskks but in the end it doesn‘t matter (by linkin park- ok i‘m so sorry it‘s 2 am and i have a headache from having waveformers in my hair all day but i still wanted to reply to this now so sorry if i‘m not making any sense right nowbahahshah)

i wanted to be a mermaid too dldjdksksj like h2O and all those series convinced me i could be one like. i remember i‘d always go in the deep pool and attempt to swim like them in all the series with that wave motion i must have looked so crazy with my goggles as well dkdjsksöksj (i was like twelve but still)

so mgk has two sides one is hip hop/rap which is like ~~~~ idk he has good and bad songs, but his latest album is like punk pop snd I LOVE IT SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, so if you like punk pop I’d recommend his album tickets to my downfall (i don‘t blame yoj if you don‘t like it tho like about a year ago i would have HATED that type of music dkdkdkkd)🥴

Okay talking about music, there‘s this german rapper and he is... not a good person. he‘s literally a criminal and extremely sexist but to me he‘s still hot???????? he‘s even cute at times even tho he has tattoos everywhere and is like 6‘5 and is super aggressive but i see him and i‘m like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 my heart beats only for you💘💘💘💘and he released a new song today and i watched the video and i‘m wondering wtf is wrong with me 😃 (he did look particularly cute cause he was high so idk he wasn’t really aggressive in this one) 😭 so i thought i‘d share that LMAO IDK

(not saying tattoos aren‘t cute btw i LOVE tattoos imma get some soon, but you know he looks like someone your grandma would be afraid of (and in his case rightfully so💀)

okay wait i‘m getting so tired it‘s 2 am i think i‘ll have to do the rest tomorrow but i wanted to do it now😭🥺🥺 see you tomorrow

it is now 3:42 am and i couldn‘t sleep so here we go again

girl you can laugh at me for liking justin tho skskks i wanna laugh at myself idk, like i said i really really really liked him a few years go, basically my life was at least 50% justin and then he went on a break for a while and released an album last year which i hated 🥴 but this album is wow. (Still weird to me because it‘s literally the definition of pop and i don‘t ever listen to pop?) and it‘s so weird because i used to know so much about justin and had so many friends who loved him as well and now it‘s like I’m listening to someone new? Don‘t get me wrong i never KNEW justin and i never will and i‘m aware of that shahsh but yeah i used to be soooo used to him and it‘s like reconnecting with an old friend and you realise you don‘t know that friend anymore- like you don‘t know them anymore at all. I mean justin is weird nowadays 😂😂😂 so pls laugh at me tbh dskksjsjsh

awww it‘s so wholesome that you gave your mom tickets to the concert 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i gave my mum tickets for pink like 2 years ago and she loved it so much and i was like 🥰🥰🥰 (i went with her) AND OMG GLEE ok so unfortunately i barely remember glee, but i used to watch it too!!!! And it‘s actually on my list of series i wanna watch (again) so youre making me want to watch it even more (but like i said i‘m bad with series so 😩😩😩 who knows when i‘ll rewatch it)

When all this pandemic shit is over (let‘s be hopeful <3333) then you need to go to as many concerts as possible!!!!! i‘ve been to SO MANY and it‘s literally one of the things in my life i‘m the most grateful for, concerts are some of the best experiences i‘ve ever had in my life especially the ones that are in smaller concert halls where you can feeeel the vibe and everyone‘s energy (and that sounds awful thinking about it mid-pandemic 😐) anyway—

Okay omg you‘re absolutely making me want to watch hamilton right now like omg i WANT TO WATCH IT NOW but it‘s 4 am sodndkdldl

what you said about my peter fics🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺like omg i love these emojis they literally just describe how i felt when reading what you said so, yes, 🥰🥺 + thank you :) it really means a lot <3

and no omg i totally get the studying thing. like last year before i graduated .. was that last year? yes wtf omg okaykdjdj, so the last three months before i had my final exams we were just in a lockdown and we didn‘t even have online classes. We had nothing except one teacher who left our group chat (😭) because she was mad at us (?) and one maths teacher who did an online ““lesson““ once a week. he‘d ask: so does anyone have questions. us: . Him: okay, bye then. So. Yeah dndldldj. But we had one online test and it was in german and like i read the book wee were supposed to read? but the questions on the test were all unanswerable (is that a word?) and i had to google everything (got an A tho 🤪 but only because i googled everything so i was so scared that i wouldn‘t be able to get a good result on the final exam because what if i‘d gotten used to just googling everything and i couldn‘t do it by myself anymore? anyway it was all fine in the end but yeah at times i couldn‘t even study because i had so much anxiety about studying and yeah- like this whole annoying cycle. but you said you‘re still studying———- okay wait 👁👄👁 i forgot what i was going to say??????????????????????????????????????????????????? Like wtf. Is wrong with me? And i‘m reading what you wrote again and i just don‘t know what i was going to say? Like i get what you‘re saying obviously but i‘m like? Idk 4am brain ayeee, please vent more if you need to and elaborate further because right now i‘m???? Too dumb to respond to this right now wtf. I‘m so sorry lmao ddlkdjdjd what is even going on like i‘m sitting here open mouthed just like ? But btw the fact that you have Voice and dance lessons is like SO FUCKING COOL like oh my god that is sosososos cool wtf, i was thinking that when you first talked about it too

And “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” ODHDKSLDBDJDOFIDKDNDLDK

Yes i know about the weather dkdkdkjd but it‘s getting (a lot) warmer here too and where i live we kind of get a weird type of wind called föhn (which literally means hair dryer but idk if that‘d the reason why it‘s called that, i‘m too tired to think of whether it makes sense rn) and it gives me headachesssssss and the changing weather is also giving me headaches 😭😭😭😭 so this season right now is just headache season and i hate summer so i wish it would just snow again lmao (okay it‘s getting so late that it‘s early already snd i can hear this bird chirping so fucking loud wtf i‘m also getting a headache 🤧🤧🤧) but at least i can do my new theme soon (i hope it‘ll look good🥺 and omg thank you for what you said about my current theme- i always feel like i‘m so bad with aesthetics, i obviously like my theme but i feel like every single person on tumblr has a theme that is prettier than mine so it was very nice to hear you say that you love it👉🏼👈🏼 (i‘m so used to it by now that i actually hate it lmao so it‘s getting yeeted soon and i‘m making megan thee stallion my pfp 🤪 (if the graphics and shit works out skdjdjdj)

#lovely anon #<333 #okay its so late now i dont wanna post it now in case i‘m too tired to notice losds of mistakes #but i also wanna post it now so.#*loads #i‘m posting it #and i absolutely do not mind if you answer like this!!!! but if you ever do feel like it‘s too much or you uust want to respond to one thing #in particular sooner then pls go ahead! <3

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fistsoflightning · 4 years

Text

mune ga hachikire-sōde

my chest is about to burst.

gatheredfates’ [30 day WOL challenge] | prompt: letter

just a lil bit of catharsis for me… sort-of kind-of a follow up to holy! also @to-the-voiceless i am So Sorry for this, thank you for letting me take the linkpearl idea from this fic but also i’m really sorry for the angst again??? that playlist you made for harudewah. i am Still losing my mind over it.

also CW: a’dewah definitely has an anxiety/panic attack and it’s. kinda hard for me to read through and i was the one who wrote it? just take caution since emotions are Messy!

[ao3 mirror] (the word count rounds to about 7.5k!)

“but i find that lately i've been crying like a tall child…

...please, hurry, leave me, i can't breathe

please don't say you love me

mune ga hachikire-sōde

one word from you and i would

jump off of this ledge i'm on, baby

tell me "don't", so i can crawl back in”

- first love/late spring, mitski

it’s barely three nights after the last visit to the cabinet that a’dewah finds himself again holed up between shelves and books, studying potential ways for g’raha to infuse the damned auracite with his blood, and a’dewah has only just realized that his hands are shaking and he has a craving to teleport to doma on a whim. a small craving for salmon muffins tickles the back of his mind, but he shoves it aside.

“i suppose i should have expected this,” he sighs to no one in particular, a small wave of magic stopping the shivering in his fingers. if only he could heal away the rest. magic can only keep him running for so long, and to extend one’s waking hours like he does would be considered harmful at best and eventually fatal at worst, should he keep doing so.

whatever must be done to keep myself from doing something stupid.

it’s not hard to see him falling back into old patterns—of tiring himself out so he doesn’t think too hard about what he doesn’t want to dwell on, of slipping further and further into both avoiding his feelings and drowning in them. his old friend; that familiar hollow, needy feeling that chews at his sanity yet again as he keeps writing down formulas that might save g’raha from doing something rash that will absolutely earn him a beating from… well. a number of people in the future. that tiny, loud, intriguingly horrible idea that sits in the center of the empty warmth burning low in his chest like a lantern running on its last bits of oil.

an angry, huffy exhale escapes his otherwise tightly sealed lips. hells, that hollow feeling shouldn’t even be there in the first place; it’s not as if he had no source of comfort here on the first—he doesn’t need haruki’s attention like some fragile flower, he could just ask zaya or wyda for a hug if he really needed the warm feeling. he shouldn’t be needing to constantly argue with himself whether he should write a letter, or call, or do nothing at all.

really, what he should do is stop thinking about it, but here he is, squeezing his eyes shut and keeping his hands planted on the table. he shouldn’t want what he nearly destroyed this much, and yet—

greedy, he chides, forcing himself to hold the quill tighter so that it presses into the callus forming on the side of his finger; a quiet, grounding pain. not even elwin sounds this silly. ‘wanting’. he doesn’t particularly care for arcanima, but if it helps him in the game of tag he’s playing with his own feelings for what feels like the millionth time in his life…

a’dewah keeps writing. reaches out for a book to his left, only flicking his eyes over for a moment to see the cover he needs, and then he sees the kanai-anzen omamori sitting on top of the very book he’d been meaning to crack open next, waiting from when zaya quietly snuck over to sit with him for a few bells.

great.

the prospect of slamming his head into the damned table and giving himself a dire enough concussion so that someone in this library gets the guts to drag him to chessamile and have her put him to sleep—preferably for a long, long time—grows more enticing every moment his brain spends convincing him that making a small, short call wouldn’t be so bad. so does the idea of finding a pouch of dream powder and using as sugar in his chamomile tea later even though he knows how lengthy a lecture he’ll receive from g’raha, alphinaud, y’shtola and lunya if he does try it.

y’shtola would be disappointed in me; looking for a simple way out instead of pushing forward, he thinks, lifting his quill from the page and glaring at the small ink pool in his usually neat (doman) handwriting. he’s still not accustomed to writing with a quill but eorzean shopkeeps don’t carry calligraphy brushes, especially not ones small enough for his needs.

but someone in kugane might, he thinks and gods he just needs to get it over with otherwise he’ll never make it to tomorrow night with his sanity intact.

he leans back in the hard, wooden chair, running a hand through his too-tightly tied up hair until his fingertips brush the edges of his linkpearl earring, searching for the one that cools his burning hands like diving into a river. once he finds it, it’s almost too simple to thumb open a connection despite the larger-than-usual tug on his own aether, the gentle chiming as he waits leaving him to wonder if this was going to be another one of his mistakes. he takes a sip of his (cold, stale) tea, steals a glance back down at the damned arcanima circles, stares back up at the glass ceiling of the cabinet and counts the stars as he waits, still pushing away the wanting that suffocates his heartbeat.

the monotonous chimes give way to a whole lot of static and the quiet rustling of leaves in the wind, and a’dewah almost thinks he’s used the wrong linkpearl until a tired, gentle voice like lazy river water whispers, “hey, can you keep this quick? it’s kinda late, and i’ve had a pretty long day.”

“ruki,” a’dewah breathes out, sitting up straight in his chair as haruki gives out a small ah of surprise. his tea is definitely cold, but he feels warmed anyways, a jolt of energy restoring the clarity to his murky thoughts. “sorry, is it a bad time?”

“a little, but i really thought you were hana-chan, or tsukiko—sorry, mune fell asleep while we were out and i was a little preoccupied.” for a connection made across worlds, the quality isn’t all that bad—a result of zaya’s very long search for a good linkshell to gift him, probably—and through it he can hear running water, maybe a few splashes and the click of haruki’s sabatons against stone as he walks slowly. he’d have sped up, if a’dewah were actually there to see him. he must be at the docks of the enclave, walking home with mune cradled in his arms. “what’s up?”

“nothing, really. i just—” needed to hear your voice. wanted to take a bit of your time. craved the warm feeling that fills my chest anytime you laugh or call me sunshine. “i have a bit of down time, and thought i’d see if you were, uh, free to talk? we—last time i was dragged into treasure hunting before i’d got to catch up with you, so i was thinking we could, well, just talk.”

“for you? of course,” haruki says, and a’dewah nearly breathes out a sigh. “just lemme get mune in bed and we can ramble about our days, or… weeks? hey, is it night there too?”

a’dewah nearly says yes, but the chirping birds and first light outside the windows of the cabinet tell him otherwise… but if he says it’s early morning, like very early, will haruki just tell him to go to bed like everyone else? he lays his head down flat on the table, staring at the quill loose in his hand and the incomplete formula on the parchment in front of him longingly. he doesn’t want that. ah, and again; wanting.

“no,” he lies, steadying his voice. a little half-truth wouldn’t hurt him… hopefully. “it’s a little later than dawn, but it’s still morning.”

“er, sir a’dewah?” just his luck; moren comes around the side of the bookshelf, eyes worried and moss green hair tied into a bun—it seems the warmer weather was getting even to the recluse librarian. “the exarch requests you do sleep soon, partly on lady lanya’s behalf? i… don’t quite know how he knows your whereabouts, but he said something about requesting the help of a “hagane-san”... d-do you think he’s in need of chessamile’s sleep draughts again?”

a’dewah stifles a groan, because moren had thoroughly blown a massive hole in his lie and haruki would have heard him. plus—since when did lunya and g’raha know about his sleeping issues? why is g’raha threatening him with hanami? why is lunya so worried about him? he lifts his head from the table, somehow pulling himself together enough to smile back at moren.

“send him my deepest regards, and that i will as soon as i’ve finished here.” a’dewah points to the linkpearl earring gleaming lightly in the dim candlelight and then to his pile of papers, and moren nods before scurrying off, presumably to wherever g’raha is watching him from. gods, if he didn’t fear lunya’s wrath, he might have strongly suggested g’raha stuff it.

haruki pipes up after moren’s footsteps recede into the sounds of dawn, more worried than chiding when he says, “dewah—”

“i know, ruki, sorry, i was just—i’m in the middle of a formula and got stumped so i called instead,” a’dewah says sheepishly, picking up his quill and writing down a few more calculations before capping his inkwell. less so being stumped and more so not wanting to do it, really, but that was for him to know. “i’m getting out of the library, don’t raise your voice, remember mune has better hearing than you.” he always forgets that he isn’t a child anymore, somehow, with a booming voice and bigger lungs to talk with.

he hears a small sigh, the creaking of leather and a small squeak of metal hinges on a door accompanying it. almost amused, but still a little annoyed, and he can hear the new clack of metal boots hitting wood much clearer, the echoing distance quieter as haruki heads inside. “...go to bed; i’ll talk to you as much as you want once you’re in bed, ‘kay?”

“keep talking to me while i get back to the pendants,” he tries, a little desperate as he starts to clean his table, re-shelve the books and pick up his research. “and i promise i won’t make a stop at spagyrics to get g’raha more sleeping draughts.” a false threat; he’s not going to invite chessamile to worry herself over two miqo’te scholars losing sleep, but he… he needs haruki’s voice. wants the background noise as he makes a long walk to the other side of the crystarium, not wanting to risk aethernet travel bungling up his work. “just any old story will do.”

“sure,” haruki says, resigned and soft enough to make a’dewah feel like melting. “hey, something kinda funny happened in kugane today…”

as a’dewah quickens his stride so that he might cross the crystarium faster, passing by the aetheryte crystal that can’t take him home no matter how hard he tries, haruki regales him with the story of mune running off (worrying) and finding a great big green chicken (even more worrying) that was apparently the pet of a gigantic man named yojimbo (oh, he’s heard this tale before, with different names) and haruki having to chase him down, eventually running into hildibrand, nashu, and some poor sekiseigumi they dragged along for the ride who were also looking for yojimbo. at one point, he breaks his sentence to whisper good night to sleeping mune, whispering even softer than before and a’dewah finds himself whispering the same thing as he climbs up the steps and passes the manager of suites without even a hello. it doesn’t matter; he’s not loud enough for mune to hear him or know that his dad is talking to his uncle across the rift, and somehow that hurts more than the bruise he gets when he trips over the last step to the third floor.

“i suggest staying far away from anything involving hildibrand,” a’dewah says as he cracks open the door to find an empty suite awaiting him; wyda and tehra’ir had left for eulmore. duscha and valdis accompanied y’shtola back to rak’tika, while lumelle and elwin trekked back to the inn at journey’s head by alisaie’s side. everyone else is… on the source. “he has a knack for getting everyone into trouble.”

haruki laughs, the bright sound covering the rattling wind against the windows—it must be a summer storm rolling in for it to be that violent in less than an hour. “i know; i called hana-chan and lunya about him when i couldn’t find mune and the damn chicken and she nearly choked when i mentioned his name.” the quiet rumble of wooden drawers opening, latches being unclasped, and oh dear a’dewah needs to distract himself before he starts blushing like a drunkard. “i think ihget’sae nearly strangled him; ‘pparently lunya wrangled everyone to come investigate when she heard mune got lost in kugane-dori.”

lost in kugane-dori. even a’dewah’s a little frightened by the thought of mune getting lost, remembering what almost happened to elwin. “anyone would, really. hildibrand is…” a’dewah mumbles. he pulls his boots off and tosses them next to elwin’s sandals, hachigane and gloves placed on the countertop by syhrwyda’s new cookbooks. it takes a lot more effort than he thought it would not to just collapse into bed with his battle robe on, carefully moving to grab his kimono cardigan and pajamas from where zaya folded and placed them on the bench. “he’s a force of nature. a very dense force of nature.”

“so, like us, but… worse?”

he sounds almost hesitant, and a’dewah feels his ears pin back in slight embarrassment. “you’d have to ask hanami for her opinion. she’d described us as, er, something colorful when she realized i hadn’t told anyone i was no longer interested in g’raha. lunya overheard and, well… i feel you know us all well enough to understand just what happens when lunya finds out your secrets.”

“you didn’t tell them, ” haruki exhales in a wheezy breath. his voice is muffled momentarily by metal and leather being carefully set aside, back onto the third shelf in haruki’s closet just behind the spare miqo’te sized clothing, just for him. he usually wears his yukata to bed, and convinced a’dewah more than once to take one of his spares when he’d realized his normal sleeping attire was back home. he—rather shamefully and awfully desperate—imagines haruki digging through his closet for the right colored yukata, chest bare and shivering as a’dewah bites back a laugh of his own, remembering how he had to point a bleary, rushing haruki to where his usual clothing was when he nearly missed mune’s genealogy presentation because he kept both of them up half the night. he imagines seiryu’s scale and how it never comes off from haruki’s chest for longer than a few moments, mostly because it keeps coming back, and a’dewah can kind of hear the thrum of the auspice’s aether. he’d always jokingly stuff it in his own pocket when haruki got fussy about it, and they hadn’t realized it would stay in his pocket so long as he didn’t leave yanxia til a’dewah went with hanami to namai with it still there, sitting quietly in his robe’s pocket. “did hanami—”

“she threw me to the wolves, yes, and i can still hear lumelle and a’satina’s screech of excitement, do not laugh at me,” a’dewah says fruitlessly, since haruki’s already choking down his laughs so not to wake maki and have her yell at both of them for being rowdy at whatever time of night it is. at some point, haruki sounds like he’s inhaled helium, and that sets a’dewah off in the middle of taking off his robe, bending over and dropping one of the clasps for the chain keeping the front close and the sash tumbling to the floor.

“i—kami, i really love you,” haruki says as easily as he breathes once he catches his breath, followed by the sound of the closet door closing, the drawer rolling back into place, and his lance being set against the wall. a’dewah’s breath hitches, something more than a little terrifying starting to worm its way out from the cracks haruki’s i love you tears into his tempered walls. his cardigan feels scratchy against his skin as he sits on the too large bed, moving to grab a blanket or two as haruki resumes his routine.

and after he’s practically wrapped himself in the blankets to the point where he’s swaddled like a newborn, he mumbles, “i’m in bed.” the rumbling static climbs in volume as a small clap of thunder sounds—he wonders, briefly, if the storm is zaya’s fault somehow—but a’dewah can still hear haruki’s quiet humming, the tune familiar from when they were just ten and still tripping over the lyrics. haruki makes a small noise of affirmation, hums quieting down. he can see haruki’s eyes scrunching up, focusing in on whatever it might be.

he starts to remove the clips and pins in his hair as haruki’s softened hums keeps him company. part of him wonders if haruki’s untied his hair yet, letting the mess of turquoise and teal down from the singular hair tie he somehow keeps it all in, or if he’ll wait until he’s already in bed and about to fall asleep when he suddenly remembers about it. his fingers tingle with the feeling of carding through haruki’s hair and braiding it just to see if he could. part of him hopes haruki will let him do it again, even though the first time he’d somehow tangled up the three parts into more of a twist than a braid.

“okay! now i am too.” a loud puff of air comes through; haruki must have flopped onto the futon with his arms and legs spread out. the rustling of the blankets, even though a’dewah is certain it’s summer and there’s a rather humid storm outside. he usually pulls the covers up to his stomach, especially when haruki tugs him onto his chest and into his arms. “anyways, how was your da—er, night?”

“i was in the library for the past sixteen bells, ruki, i don’t think you want to hear about it. talk about your… your past few weeks?”

“ah, right,” he says, not at all phased by the confused tone of a’dewah’s voice. “well, i got back from gangos with a new staff for mune! i’m saving it for when he finishes his current lessons with the kojin on, er, water aether? he still doesn’t like going there alone, though; he keeps asking when you’ll come back whenever i mention it.”

“is that so?” a’dewah cracks a weak smile like haruki might see it somehow. “promise i’ll be back soon… but who made a custom staff for him?”

“oh, the bozjan resistance got… was it gerolt? well, it’s something about him being a great blacksmith perfect for reconstructing the blades of gunnhildr, and he was offering services to anyone who could get him the materials, so!”

haruki rambles on about how he’d needed to “expertly persuade” hanami into helping him out with finding the inscriptions for the weapon only to realize he couldn’t do shite since they’d have to delve into the memories of poor cid, who really deserved to have a break and a lot of tea, and with each sentence a’dewah sinks deeper into something horrible. the part of him that is selfish, craves attention and touch, seems so much colder now than it was before, the hollow pit now a yawning chasm of wanting. of yearning.

he does not deserve to be yearning for haruki’s hands running across his skin, scratching at the nape of his neck to comfort and behind his ears just for fun. love is not meant to be as one-sided as he’s making theirs, a cycle of unrequested but nonetheless cherished actions rather than one side constantly wanting and the other giving. part of him wonders if he really ever loved before, or if it was just the terrible, horrible monster inhabiting the same space as him craving affection and getting it however it could, wringing it from the people a’dewah cared for.

(did his short-lived love for g’raha feel as twisted as the garden of emotions he grows in his chest for haruki? or was this what being loved and loving in return felt like?)

he bites his lip as haruki mentions a few other things he’s had happen in the time a’dewah’s been away—a very lovingly made omamori from mune, complete with a cat charm that sounds terrifying to him that lunya chose out, something about meeting tsukiko in her civilian clothing and her panicking, a visit from seiryu and suzaku inquiring to his and hanami’s whereabouts that spooked shomi and maki for a precious few seconds, a conversation with someone who said how people dream to stay with someone even in sleep—and tries not to wish for too much. even with suzaku’s blessings, his heart was still weaker; if he stressed about how good a partner he was to haruki, he might die here without ever seeing him again.

he’s probably exaggerating a little, but he’s got that odd feeling he’s going to die soon. just a little.

when haruki finishes going on about his incredibly interesting past few moons, a comfortable, smothering silence begins. a’dewah shuffles himself about so his tail isn’t suffocated under the blanket, whipping about slowly. “hey, are… are maki-san and shomi-san still, er, angry at me?”

“you really can drop the honorific, dewah,” haruki chides quietly. “but! no. not really. mother might talk to you about communicating when you come back, but you’ll be fine.” it sounds an awful lot like i won’t let them hurt you, which is stupid; they’re haruki’s mothers, they wouldn’t hurt him intentionally—but a’dewah is much softer than the stuff aymeric and hanami and haruki are made of. a golden heart, haruki says, but gold is soft. malleable. melts, under enough heat, and he is already filled with enough molten feelings to rival the sun’s heat. a’dewah is fairly certain he will melt if he damages his relationship to the haganes more than he already has, the solar flares of regret and guilt worse than any magical red lilies he could conjure.

he wants and yet he fears what he craves, left wondering which part of him is the broken bit that needs to be healed so that he might be able to just ask for it instead.

“i… er, don’t believe you, really… but i miss all of you,” a’dewah admits, feeling a bit smaller and colder than before. then, a quieter, less sure thought that really has no business bothering him: “e-except maybe itomi-san, even though she d-doesn’t really count?”

“well, y’know, she and naonaka kinda disowned themselves, so you’ll be fine.” haruki’s voice drops a smidge into bitterness—well, that wasn’t what he meant to do, curse his stupid mouth—but haruki recovers easily. he always has. “homesick for here, huh? tell you what; you can list what you miss the most, and i’ll see if i can get hana-chan to carry it over for you. maybe a’khebica has some ideas.”

“i don’t—it’s. what i miss from there isn’t, er, something hanami can bring through the rift. khebica wouldn’t know, either.”

“well, the offer still stands; i might be able to arrange something,” haruki says, and a’dewah just knows he is winking to his ceiling with a gleaming grin across his face like a’dewah can see him, and in a way, he can. it takes everything he has not to groan and smile at the goofy thought in return.

even if he did list what he missed so much about home, he’d just sound so desperate because what he misses most is haruki. for the past four years he’s been confined to the first it’s been haunting him just how much he’d relied on haruki’s energy to fuel his own once garlemald started pressing down on them double time, wondering if any of his strength was really his own. he wants what the letters they send back and forth describe; the quiet nights spent in each others’ company, the adventures in eorzea he promised, the hugs and kisses and that one dance haruki really wants him to do, the garden they’ve been caring for since he’s been gone.

lunya had offhandedly mentioned, once, how he and haruki wrote to each other like a married couple in their honeymooning phase, and he flushed a brighter red than dalamud not because she implied they were married but because he really, really wanted that more than he should. a step too far too soon, especially with the empire breathing down the warrior of lights’ necks, but fuck he really wanted to promise his future to haruki even if he didn’t know how much longer he would live just because it felt more right than everything else a’dewah could have done.

he wants too much. greedy, needy, childish wants. he just wanted to be loved for so long, and now that he has it he wants more. wanton.

“i can’t quite think of anything,” he lies through his teeth even though what he really wanted to say was i want to be yours, forever because he is and will always be a coward. “but if i figure something out i’ll tell you.”

for all his perceptiveness when a’dewah is sitting in front of him, haruki doesn’t seem to be able to pick up on him feeding both of them lies through linkpearl. maybe something to do with the interference. “‘kay.” the silence rolls back in, like an early morning fog that chills a’dewah because he knows what he’s dreading is hiding in that fog.

please don’t say you love me, a’dewah pleads even though that’s exactly what he wants to hear. i don’t want this to end, i want to listen to your voice for so much longer, i want to hear about you, i want, i want—

he must have pissed off some sort of kami of misfortune, because the very next thing haruki whispers to him, so sweet and kind and not at all knowing what he’s doing to a’dewah’s heart, is “i love you, dewah.”

“...l-love you too, ruki,” he barely manages to say, not even toying with the idea of saying love you more like usual, and oh he’s starting to cry, how embarrassing. it takes everything he has to clamp his hand over his traitorous mouth and patiently wait for haruki to end the connection, pull the blankets over his chest and go to sleep while a’dewah fights with the monster leaping out of the holes in his greedy, greedy heart.

for a moment, haruki goes quiet, only soft breathing coming over the aetheric connection, and a’dewah thinks he might be asleep. he… hopes haruki is asleep; he doesn’t know what he’d do if haruki heard him, really.

and then of course a’dewah’s fingers slip, a loud sob that sounds more like a dying cat than him tearing through the cracks, and the silent turmoil is broken as haruki obviously gets pulled from the beginnings of sleep.

“...sunshine?” haruki asks, sleep fogging up his voice and a’dewah stupidly opens his mouth to respond which only lets out a whimper instead of it’s fine , and gods he’s a horrible, horrible mess, why is he like this . it’s not fair of him to keep asking for haruki to talk him down from the edge, to cry every time he calls and expect haruki to pick up the pieces when they both know hearing him crumbles hurts both of them. “dewah? was that noise you?”

and on the other end, a’dewah can hear the rustling of blankets being pushed off—shite, he’s keeping haruki up by being a child about this—and haruki’s hands slapping onto his bedding in a light thump as he pushes himself up in fear. “what’s wrong,” haruki says so kindly and fuck, he’s crying harder now and a’dewah was already teetering on edge of something completely and entirely disastrous before he did this, why did he do this again? “did something happen?”

everything is happening at once, more like.

“i don—i don’t know,” he cries, wrapping his arms around his head like he used to when prisca would say stop crying like it would keep him safe from his own thoughts… but haruki’s not prisca and he’s using his time for him instead of for himself so why is this even happening, he shouldn’t be panicking. the blanket tangles around him, comfort twisted into a trap and a’dewah feels like he’s drowning. “i wish i did but i don’t and i’m so sorry please just end the call i need you to sleep—”

part of him is screaming please don’t leave me alone and the other part wails don’t listen to me cry again, i can’t be good for your health while a third, utterly confused bit of him sits trapped in the middle, hunkered down. the monster a’dewah has been running from has opened its maw and spews out all the things he utterly craves but ultimately does not deserve from life, threatening to swallow him whole and permanently, this time.

“sunshine, i’m not going to let you be alone when you’re crying like that,” haruki says, and a’dewah can’t tell if it’s pity or disappointment pouring through the linkpearl but he hates it, please just leave him here to suffer. “unfortunately, you’ve found a very stubborn person to date.”

he knows, but he also knows haruki knows danger when he hears it, so why doesn’t he run from this?

because he loves you, part of him thinks in mune’s voice, remembering the comfort the little raen boy could bring in four words when a’dewah looked worried in the middle of teaching him something and gods, since when was a child more emotionally mature than him?

maybe because you never got the chance to be a kid and grow up normally, he thinks again, teetering dangerously close to hyperventilating as he practically strangles his fingers in his tangled hair.

he has absolutely zero clue what haruki has been saying for the past few moments, evident in the rising worry seeping through haruki’s usually calm, energetic, happy voice. “love, i need you to breathe,” he coos, and a’dewah hisses, lungs not working with him no matter how much he wants to listen, his wanting finally turning on its head. “here; listen to me. follow, please, i can’t help you if you hyperventilate.”

he’s extremely glad past him had the forethought to tell haruki a bit about how he deals with scared patients, because he remembers to murmur in, breath deep, out, breathe out, and even though a’dewah chokes on his own air he can catch up. i’m here, i’m here, haruki hisses between breaths, and hells open, heavens weep, if he wasn’t already crying his dedication to making sure he’s alright rather than listening and cutting the call would have made him weep.

“hey, sh-sh-sh,” haruki coos once a’dewah’s breaths sound less like desperate gasps for air and more like struggling to breath past the fat tears streaming down his face. “i won’t leave you alone, you can pretend i’m there next to you until you can actually lie down next to me again.”

but you know i’m no good at playing pretend. he can’t believe himself, sobbing and wrapping himself further under his blanket and letting the fluffy, stuffy feeling wrap around him in some poor facsimile of being hugged. nothing here could possibly measure up to the feeling he so desperately craves, even though it’s just being in haruki’s arms. all he really wants is a hug. imagine that.

gods, it must be killing haruki to listen to a’dewah sob like he’s dying—he’s never going to tell haruki that he actually died, a bolt of ice piercing through his chest and suzaku’s feather on a staff he had no access trying to save him once more—and he has half a mind to cut the connection between linkpearls just to save one of them from being in pain but his arm makes the executive decision to try and rip his hair out instead. he almost never has control over himself when he’s blubbering, so he’s not so much surprised as he is sickened by his lack of restraint.

“i—” he chokes on the words, a hiccuping gasp shocking both of them. “i’m s-orry, i didn’t mean t’ pull you back from sleeping.”

his chest feels like there’s a thousand ponze weight crushing it down into dust, his emotions becoming too much like they always do, inevitably. in a better universe, maybe he would have had the restraint to let haruki go to sleep first, cut the call, and be miserable on his own until wyda came back, or duscha decided to return because he somehow always knew when he’d break down next. so did krile. maybe there’s just something innately motherly about scholars when it comes to their younger peers (was krile older than him?).

“i wasn’t meaning to pass out then and there, dewah, but i’m sorry for making you think i was going to leave you hanging like that.” haruki makes a little noise that sounds like oh dear, followed by the quiet ripping of fabric. did he clench his sheets so hard his nails tore into them? “i had a feeling something was wrong from the moment you said you called because you had time.”

well then. isn’t that a bit embarrassing, to be found out from the beginning. “i shouldn’t have called.”

“but you did, and i’m very glad for it,” haruki answers honestly, and a’dewah can imagine him sitting, a little hunched over and relieved, eyes half-lidded and foggy with sleep, because he’s always been one to work himself down to the bone and pass out, and a’dewah’s been keeping him up for stupid reasons, this time. “you deserve to feel okay, and i don’t mind losing a lil sleep over it.”

a’dewah doesn’t deserve anything, really, but he’ll take what haruki gives just because he doesn’t want to be rude when he’s offering support so kindly. even if it’s exactly what he’s craving—comfort. haruki knows him too well and one day it’s going to get him killed, either from heartbreak when a’dewah screws up for the last time or from actual danger when a’dewah gets the haganes in trouble by being a public figure with a very peculiar lover and an adorable nephew that also happen to be related to another warrior of light.

“ruki, go to bed.” he curls up into his pillow, poking his head through a hole in the tangles of the blanket to breathe. he’ll just stay up until his stomach rights itself and the sickening dread-guilt sets in, something more comfortable than panic and safer than feeling content, because when he wakes up he absolutely won’t be okay no matter what.

“no, dewah, i think i won’t go to bed if you don’t too."

fuck, please don’t start this. “i—no, ruki, you can’t stay up on account of me being emotional, i’ll be—”

haruki scoffs, though more at the stifling tension and the lie than at a’dewah himself. “fine? please don’t lie to me. don’t close off again.”

“b-but… it’s not fair to you,” he croaks out, finally, throat raspy and dry. “to keep asking you to care for me when i break down. you—you’re not supposed to constantly have to listen to me cry, not when it hurts both of us because listening to someone you love in pain is horrible, horrible work.” he had experience with listening—watching over someone as they writhed in pain and knowing there was nothing he could do but watch if he didn’t want to harm them. he’d done it a thousand times before, and would do so a thousand more so long as the world needed heroes and wars. walking around amaurot besides hanami and zaya nearly tore his heart in two because no matter how afraid of them he might be they were suffering the whole time and even when he was pulled from the rift by g’raha and could heal again he couldn’t stop their pain as they all valiantly fought emet-selch. “let me just be fine, let me learn to take care of myself.”

he doesn’t want haruki to have to care for someone broken as him when the dirty work could easily be done by himself. he might be a caretaker by—not by nature, but by experience —but even the most stalwart caretakers have their limits and by nophica’s grace he does not want to be the straw that breaks haruki’s back. if haruki ever got tired of him, because everyone gets tired of a stubborn crybaby eventually no matter how much they love the person they can be, he wouldn’t know what to do. he’s too reliant, acting like a child when really he’s an adult, and it isn’t healthy for either of them to be like this.

a’dewah doesn’t want to leave but if his solar flares of emotions are hurting haruki he’d rather jump into the ocean and be extinguished forever instead.

“well, most people learn best by example. breathe,” haruki says, quiet even as the storm outside his home rages. he takes as deep a breath as he can, listening to haruki breathe with him. “can you name one person, besides me, all of balefire, and the scions, that has shown you how to care for yourself?”

haruki leaves him in strenuous silence as he thinks, still there but waiting. he almost says my parents, but the last time he saw them was when he was eight, long since buried and he’s nearly thirty-six now—and really, did the nunh of any tribe really care for his sons past their strength, of which he had none because khebica said he’d inherited their mother’s love for the elements. mahja and tahja were too busy trying not to be a burden for him, atoh and vahno were both too young and needed to be cared for first, khebica was taught to care for herself first after what happened to her, and he was the only one castrum fluminis wanted anyhow and they nearly broke him before he was eighteen so who else? tsukiko was still too afraid of yudai, louisoix had so many others to look for first, e-sumi-yan didn’t even know—

“...i. i don’t know,” he says, and the revelation nearly shatters him. even among the people haruki had him exclude, he’d only just started letting them fuss about his wellbeing, except... “you might—you were the first. for a while, the only person i let try. you were just too—too...”

“persistent? thank you, it’s one of my strengths,” he says, a smile leaking through the crackling connection that makes a’dewah’s chest stutter in its rise and fall. “and besides, when i first saw you in that rice paddy i seriously got worried ‘cause i saw kotone almost drown there that same day. you were so much shorter, too.”

“ hey, i w-wasn’t that short then.”

“were too. anyways, you kinda proved my point. let me help, because i want to, and i’m sure you’ll be able to do it on your own soon. i want you to get better,” haruki promises, and the words a’dewah turns over in his head have a cool warmth to them, like diving into the one river in summer. something distinct, grounding. loving. “and if it means i have to share your pain, so be it. i can take a fair amount.”

great; he’s going to cry again, all because haruki loves him too damn much and he doesn’t know how to deal with it all, an ocean’s worth of devotion and promises poured into his hands and leaking through his fingers.

“i—i did warn you that this stuff is horrible, right? i don’t want you to get hurt from my issues,” a’dewah murmurs, hands grasping uselessly at his cardigan’s sleeves and fingers cramping from it all.

“yeah, and? it’s you. there’s not a lot that can keep me from helping you, save this damned soul-ghost situation. no matter what comes up, you’re stuck with me for the near future.”

a shaky breath on both sides, trying to survive the last few tremors of a’dewah’s fragile temperament. fabric rustling on haruki’s end; good, he must be tucking himself back under the covers, albeit gingerly. the guilt might eat at him later, if haruki says he didn’t sleep well, but for now the weirdly soothing thought of you’re stuck with me smooths the prickly bits in his chest back down.

“i have an idea.” haruki shifts, horn with his linkpearl brushing against his pillow. maybe he’s looking out the window, or looking out his door to check if he’d woken someone up in talking sense back into a’dewah. “we can keep the connection open ‘til morning; i’ve got aether to spare and you’ve even more than i do, right? it’ll be kinda like waking up next to each other,” haruki says soothingly, even though it won’t be like he says because a’dewah won’t be able to turn over and laugh at haruki’s bedhead, won’t be able to lazily pull haruki’s arm over his shoulders and feel safe. “we’ve got similar sleep schedules. it shouldn’t be too hard compared to saving the world.”

“i—i know what you mean, but…” what if when i wake up hearing your voice but not seeing you beside me just makes it worse, he would say if he had the guts, but all of those had jumped out the window with common sense when he made this damned call.

and yet haruki just knows him too well and answers anyways. “hey, it’ll be fine. think of it this way; part of me is always thinking about you, even if i don’t realize it, so just think of me,” haruki says, and a’dewah already knows where he’s going with this but isn’t that a thing they all reserve for mune, who is starting to grow up faster than they can keep up with? “and i’ll be there with you, always, because i trust you with my heart—and if that isn’t enough, i’m still just a call away, right?”

“r-right,” a’dewah whispers back, eyes brimming this time not with pained tears but happy ones, not even knowing how much he needed that little bit of permission until now. his heart is finally settling, after three or four nights of restless searching, restless wanting , simmering quietly in its proper place rather than leaving him hollow and melting. “and... i trust you with mine.”

neither of them have to say it, but even with the rain pouring down by haruki’s window and the winds outside a’dewah’s the silence coming over the linkpearl finally feels calm.

haruki’s next yawn is loud, and a’dewah can hear the tension melt from his voice like frost in spring and silver dew from plants in summer. “d’you think you can sleep now? or… should i serenade—”

his voice is utterly wrecked, but he somehow manages to yowl, “i can sleep fine!”

haruki’s bubbling laughter rises with the thunder outside his house, filling a’dewah with liquid gold warmth—not molten, but soothing, comforting, home. no longer threatening to melt him from the inside out but strengthening, and he can feel himself blushing at the thought of warm hugs just like this even though it’s not all that much, in the grand scheme of things.

when both of them manage to calm down—haruki from his ever bubbling joy and a’dewah from his constant state of embarrassment when it comes to haruki—it’s not too much for a’dewah to rub his eyes one last time and simmer in the dark warmth sitting further inside his chest, no longer threatening to overtake him for now. not bright, like his magic and the light and the harsh sun. dark, like the sunless sea and the stars and shooting stars overlapping, even if two of those things aren’t quite dark.

for someone proficient in white magic, it feels safer in the dark than the light.

“i miss you,” he whispers even though he has a feeling haruki found a way to laugh himself to sleep—oh, no, his breath hitches when a’dewah hiccups in an ugly croak, gods why does haruki find him attractive despite all of this—thinking of teals and oranges and fireflies that light up the white scales lining haruki’s jawline. “and i think i always will, a little bit. i want to be yours forever.”

there, he’s said it; i want. the simmering, unknown dark cools off, no longer warbling his voice, and his eyes start to feel heavy as adrenaline bubbles away.

“i could say the same, dewah,” haruki whispers back, words fraying as a’dewah’s past few days of running catch up to him, finally. “i miss you too, but you’ll be back soon, so for now? sleep tight.”

and he does, the tinny sounds of haruki’s breathing evening out lulling him to his dreams where he isn’t so far away from home.

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #seaswolchallenge #a'dewah tia #haruki #s: sitting in a persimmon tree #my writing #hey so im sorry for emotional damages?#but if i have to be cursed by the inevitable linkpearl idea so do you #luckily! there's gonna be a fluffy/crack/joke fic version. do with that info what you will >:3 #tales from the blue

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hyunjizns · 5 years

Text

dating minho

⤷ mr lee know about vroom vroom right into y’all’s hearts

how you guys start dating

you and minho meet by chance, it’s quite funny actually

so he’s taking one of his usual walks by the han river and you happen to be there just enjoying the serenity of the area after picnicking with your friends

what happens is that you and your friends decide you wanna be childish and play tag

because despite you guys being grown you have the mindset of five year olds

anyway you guys are running, playing, laughing and your dumbass is just having the time of your life trying to catch your friends

that being said you weren’t looking where you were going and you run right into some dude

that some dude turns out to be MINHO

and you’re just like “fuck sorry”

your brain is a mess okay, sorry you just ran right into a hot dude??? the only logical thing to do is to hddhjdsksk

now minho for one doesn't know what to do because if it were anyone else he would probably like shout at them on first instinct

but he didn't with you

maybe his heart softened because you somehow looked adorable in your frantic apologetic state

so he flashed his minho, award winning smile and told you not to worry about it

you felt bad, though because you hit into him pretty hard

and minho senses this because he ! is ! minho ! so he tells you not to worry

and you’re like okay,,,, if you say so,,

but that's not the last meeting between you two

so you end up meeting again by chance but the setting is a bit more formal

it’s at a café and minho is out with the guys

so he's in the line and you’re right behind and guess what???

you accidentally stand on the back of his shoe like geez y/n

and he turns around like WTf but he recognises you

the one who knocked him right over at the han river a few days ago

“you!”

you both go at the same time and it’s like that moment

like déjà vu hello

fate is that you??

so anyways the line is long and you two end up talking a bit and like the boys are getting whining but he doesn't care because you're actually quite interesting

you apologise AGAin for the incident at the han river because ugh

but of course he's like it's fine shhh

he finally gets to the top of the line and gets the drinks for the boys but he comes back over to you

but just slips you his number with a wink

and you die inside just a ᵗᶦⁿʸ ᵇᶦᵗ

now you two become such good friends from there on because minho just finds it so easy to talk to you

he doesn't have to be looking for a way to start a conversation

yes all the boys know about you, minho's little friend

and when he finally starts to realise he's lowkey crushing

he tries to stop it but unfortunately that just doesnt work out

pls everytime he gets a text from you he's a smiling mess

he's just really happy okay

the boys are like ohHohO

insert eyebrow wiggle

and they catch on to this lil crush that minho has on you

woojin is the main one trying to get him to confess but he's that typical "i don't wanna ruin our friendship kind of guy"

but after a little- lot more pestering from the boys he goes for it

it's when you ask him to come over and watch a movie with you

and while you guys are on the couch, his heart is just beating so fast then he's like

fUCK IT

and just "y/n i like you, i like you so much. would you be mine?"

he just couldn't take it anymore

your heart stops???

but there begins the minho x y/n fairy tale

minho as a boyfriend

ugh !! this boy has THE biggest soft spot for you like girl consider yourself extra special

you would never catch him getting this mushy over anyone, even jisung

usually people are shocked when they see how minho acts around you because he treats you like a porcelain doll and he’s just so protective of you??

like that’s not the minho they know, not the one that bullies them

okay so now that i’ve said that, he may be soft for you but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s minho

like for dates for example, he’s a lazy boy i’m sorry so he’s gonna prefer to stay at home and just watch movies

with you there to comfort him

big, super planned out dates are not his thing

he would most definietly love anime dates

because this boy loves !! anime

pls he's gonna have his head on your lap and you're gonna be absently playing with his hair

while he intensely watches

and shhhh

you're absolutely not allowed to talk while it's showing

but discussing the plot in the end is a must, he has a lot to critique

he also would like those quiet times that you guys have together where you kinda just enjoy each other’s presence

he likes reading so he will wanna do a book rec and like whenever you read anything he recommends his heart will just bURsT

just akshhskls his baby is reading what he recommended !!!

he loves teasing you pls that’s just the dynamics of your relationship

he lives for your smiles okay so when you roll your eyes and giggle at him, his heart warms

the two of you live off of playfully "insulting" one another

which usually leads to playful fights

where someone's usually in a headlock, that person usually being you

he's a bit violent like that..

but that’s okay because you know what you signed up for getting into this relationship

jealous minho is quite interesting

because like he doesn’t wanna show that he’s super jealous so he’s trying so hard

but anyone that sees his face just knows that he is not !!!! having it

in situations where you notice, you just grab his hand and give it a tight squeeze or peck his lips just to let him know that no one’s gonna be stealing you from him

if he takes the initiative he won’t like go overboard but he’s gonna get protective of you

so expect a lot of affection from him and smug looks at whoever’s flirting with you

after the encounter he’s a puppy behind you

“y/n, you only love me right?”

“yes, of course minho”

ugh everyone’s like wtf? because minho is never ever ever like this with anyone

aNYONE i tell you

he appreciates you so so so much when you stay late at the studio waiting for him to finish up practice whether it be him practicing dancing, rapping or singing

he does not ever plan to tell you how adorable he thinks you are while watching him despite the exhaustion threatening to take you over

he also loves dancing with you even if you can’t dance he finds it adorable

like wow

even though you might trip and look like an absolute fool you’re still willing to dance with him

how did he get so lucky??

he is absolutely not that matchy matchy boyfriend though

and you guys are just not That Gross Couple™

no matter how much you beg him to match outfits

or take those gross couple photos

he will not !!

that’s not in minho’s boyfriend handbook

that being said this means that he is not big on pda

like sure he may kiss you and what not but sorry he gets real passionate and the boys do not want to see that

one time jeongin walked in on one of your um sessions

NO I’M NOT TALKING ABOUT S*X YOU NASTY

just a make out session that was pretty damn heated

the poor baby’s eyes were scarred

like minho is just so rough and passionate, it leaves you breathless every single time

he likes to have his hands in your hair, on your waist or grabbing your butt

and the kisses usually start off moderately paced but once you get into it there’s no going back

there’s almost always tongue and he’s usually in control

he lives for neck kisses, jawline kisses and collarbone kisses

he also likes to mark you because he just loves the fact that you’re his and these marks just make it known to the whole entire world

he can be pretty soft when it comes to kisses too but he doesn’t really like peck your lips

or give those short, meaningless kisses

when he kisses it’s either all or none

BYE I’M SCREECHING

i’m not gonna lie to you he can cook so well and you know it

but he fakes being a big fat mess in the kitchen so that you would come help him

look minho’s just a big baby in a “manly” body

he likes to do that cliché thing where he back hugs you in the kitchen

like please minho we get it

also i’m sorry but you literally cannot go anywhere with him that involves packing clothes

because ? him ? and ? his bundles ?

he’s very passionate about his bundles and listen he’s gonna want to rope you into it too, basically packing your clothes for you in bundles

you’re like “minho PleASe, this is not the 18th century”

and he just goes, “bundles are more effective”

cue your eye roll

but it’s all in good fun, if his bundles make him happy you’re more than willing to accept it

hey, he’s the love of your life

when it comes to fights or being angry at each other it doesn’t happen that often

but he’s a tricky puzzle because he doesn’t voice his anger or whatever

actually he’s really good at bottling up his emotions (which isn’t good but you’ve worked around it and figured out how to get him to open up)

he’s an avid user of the silent treatment

dun dun dunnnn

and you absolutely cannot stand it so you usually are the first to crack in arguments

lemme tell you, he loves you yes he does

but he knows how to stand his ground

so you end up trying to get him to talk to you and just get to fixing the problem at hand

but it always ends in good cuddles so the tension doesn’t last long

OH and cuddling

ahhhh minho actually really loves cuddling and having conversations whether they’re deep or goofy

usually y’all cuddle on your lazy dates

he likes you to lie your head on his chest while his hand is wrapped around your waist

and you two can talk for hours

your relationship with minho in general is just very playful

with your soft moments ofc

and it just makes it super hard for anyone to not ship it

get you a man like lee know ;)

#minho #lee minho #minho fluff #minho scenarios #minho imagines #minho as your boyfriend #lee know #lee know fluff #lee know angst #minho angst #stray kids fluff #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fluff #kpop imagines #lee know imagines #lee know scenarios

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sumeshi-t · 4 years

Text

when to shutcho bitchass up.

so i had this long ass reply as i was about to reblog a haikyuu writer’s response to a hate ask but i had to eat lunch, and my wifi’s acting up so it all got deleted. but anyway, after lurking in the shadows for god knows how long, i decided to speak up about this on-going issue of hate being poorly masked as “constructive criticism”.

it doesn’t just happen on haikyuu blogs, like, every fandom has it. and it saddens me because i’ve seen the greatest blogs out here just vanish into thin air (or has gone on hiatus and never returned/archived the blog/deactivated) for getting hate that they absolutely do not deserve. nobody does. nobody needs that hate; not now not ever. most often than not, there are people who hide behind the anon feature in asks. but i guess some people lately have now learned how to own up to their own mistakes; and yes, everyone’s opinion is valid, is welcome to be entertained; however the way you word these things out also matters. it’s just like when someone writes something, you know? why do you get to complain, “your writing suckxz” when you can’t even write down why you think so? lol gtfo. people can interpret your words in however way they want, and that’s the one thing you cannot control. so at least, when you attempt to apologize for something you “didn’t mean to” or “was just a joke”, at least make it sound like you mean it. if you want your opinion to be taken seriously, learn how to say it with manners.

anyway, this post will be terribly long, probably longer than the shit i’ve ever written anywhere lmao. some of the things i’ll say here might come off as redundant but because the same thing happens over and over again, what else would you expect?

Exhibit A: “constructive criticism” does not mean, or shall never be equated to “hate”

if you go around tumblr, there are tons of posts which educate people how to properly write a critique, how to decently and reasonably critic someone’s work, whether it be in the form of writing, or digital art, etc. even if you type “constructive criticism” on that google search bar, tons of websites are going to tell you how to do it, so it really is unacceptable to use “it’s constructive criticism” as an excuse when all you’ve said is “your writing sucks”. literally, how can “constructive criticism” go from “you’re not even a good writer, why the hype?” to “you’re too positive, too fake, if you’re sad, show that you’re sad.” that ain’t it chief. constructive criticism is given to the works of a content creator, not directed at the content creator itself.

ever heard of the sandwich method? yeah, yummy and easy, right? basically it means, you start it off with the positive things about the content creator, then the negative ones in the middle, then reinforce them at the end. okay, i’ll repeat that here, let me break it down if that isn’t enough for cute little noggins to understand:

tell the content creator what made you hooked on their works in the first place. what made you indulge in all that deliciously free content, that has brought you to tears, to laughs, to orgasm. you don’t necessarily have to praise them, but acknowledge that you’re aware of what they’re doing and how it is, or how their progress is so far.

now here comes the critique part. this where the “however” and the “but” words come in, to transition from (for example) “your way with words is breathtaking” to “sometimes i feel they’re too much to digest all at once”. get it? pinpoint to the content creator just exactly what aspects in their current state do you wish they could improve on, or areas do you think they are lacking or weak, so to speak. be concise, be comprehensive, be nice.

lastly, my favorite part, is you give them tips or advice or just a fucking hint how you think they can achieve the things you said from #2. even if you know or assume that they’d understand your point, or “it’s their job to find it out by themselves”... well, a little input or jumpstart wouldn’t hurt, would it? so from the example, “your way with words is breathtaking” to “(however) sometimes i feel they’re too much to digest all at once” you end it with a, “i think or why don’t you try doing so, and this, and that,”

lemme go back to the “it’s their job to find it out by themselves” aha, news flash honey: this isn’t their job. it’s their way of enjoyment, their leisure, their free time that they use up just to bring out free content for lots of people like you to indulge in. most people come here, or on ao3, or basically anywhere where you can post your work, just for fun. you cannot be demanding, that’s why they have their rules and all, but i digress. content creators feed on feedback, and feedback alone. i hope you have an idea how something as simple as “asdflkjshdls” in the tags can bring a phat smile to a content creator’s face, what more, if it’s something coherent. just fucking keyboard smash is a boost to their confidence (trust me, it’s very fun knowing that how “asdfgjkl” i was when writing something, is the same as the “asdfgjkl” the readers had when reading)

this sandwich method thing doesn’t only apply to this certain situation. in fact, this is an effective means of communicating your point across to people in school, at work, and even in the comforts of your home. right?

didn’t you feel bad when your teacher returned your paper to you and just said, “i gave you that grade just because” and nothing more? or when that classmate of yours said, “no, i don’t like this idea. think up of something else” for a project? didn’t you ever question them, “why, and on what basis?”

how about, when your boss returned your report, only saying, “revise this” but what is “this”? sure, there are bosses who do this to try to teach their employees to find things out and find solutions on their own, but you cannot deny that some are just being disgustingly rude about it.

how about at home you say? well... remember that time when your parents compared you to their friends’ children, or even compared you among your own siblings? or that time you were lashed out on? actually, you know, what, i’m sorry for bringing this up, as light as this was worded out, some people might get triggered simply from those two phrases i put out. however, i will address this issue next.

Exhibit B: you don’t know the people you are talking to, therefore you do not know what they are going through

you can’t say, “oh, you’re all just so sensitive” or “it’s just an opinion” when clearly, this (tw: depression, suicide, family issues, gender and sexuality, body positivity, etc) topics is/are sensitive to most content creators, to most people. some brush it off fine, and take a while to reach their boiling point, but not everyone’s like that. you can’t tell people how they should react to your random spewing of hate. each person has their own level of tolerance, so don’t go off and assume that everybody online is the same and grew from the same fucking tree.

some or most people use writing/drawing/etc. as a means to cope with what shit life has thrown at them; and then you, being so stupidly ignorant, just waltz in and drop that bomb on what possibly, could be the only ray of sunlight they have in their life, especially now in this bleak year.

receiving anon-hate or hate-asks should not be the norm. it is not and never will be okay. i thought you were here to critic their work, why even joke about something that could have been personal to someone? why even joke about these kinds of things in the first place? why even bring up something that might have been a personal issue when all you had to do was critic their work?

my god, stop acting like a boomer already. tbh the audacity of some people here, idk. if you’re not going through anything at all, then may god/brahma/allah/whichever supreme being you believe in or whatever good karma it is, bless you.

it’s not that one should sympathize, or, it isn’t also expected of people to full on empathize, but a little respect goes a long way. why don’t we try to put ourselves in the shoes of the person we’re about to send that hate-ask to. if not us, how about that close friend who’s easy to bring to tears, or mom, or cousin? wouldn’t it be aggravating? wouldn’t it be painful?

well... who am i to assume, i don’t even know you. get it?

just please, acknowledge that everyone here is human. they have emotions, they have their own thoughts, they have their own lives outside of the screen. how they choose to portray themselves here has nothing to do with you. how they choose to react to that hate ask doesn’t have to do with anything you should concern yourself with.

LET PEOPLE ENJOY THINGS. LET PEOPLE LIVE THEIR LIFE THEIR OWN WAY, both virtual and in reality.

i know this post won’t get too far, but i have had enough of seeing the nicest people, who just wanted to express their creativity and share the happiness and the fun, be put down just because of unnecessary hate. i hope those people who send those in never get to experience that, or if they have, i hope they understand that doing so to others isn’t going to change anything about themselves.

#no to anon hate #stop hating #everybody is human #APPRECIATE CONTENT CREATORS #ITS FREE REAL ESTATE #spread love not hate #spread legs not hate #leesten

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