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venusacrossthestars · 3 days

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putt-putt

pairing- Lando Norris x fem!reader

wc- 1.3k

summary- You and Lando are too competitive for you own good, so what is a better date idea than a round of putt-putt

a/n: this is a little b-day gift for my bestest friend @arieslost I LOVE YOU BESTIE.

f1 masterlist

“Babe, I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

If someone walked in and saw the look on Lando’s face they would assume that you just kicked the poor man’s dog. But the truth to Lando’s sad expression- your insistence that a mini-golf date was not at all a great idea that Lando chalked it up to be.

Lando stares up at you from where his head rest on your lap, his lips pouted out, “Why not?”

“Are you seriously asking me that? Do you remember the last time we went? Or the time we played Mario Kart, Uno, Monopoly. Do you remember anytime we played something that had us competing against each other.” Lando continues to stare at you, as if he has no idea what you are talking about.

“Lando! Seriously?! We each get pissy at each other. We are both too competitive for our own good.”

Lando shoots up from were he was laying, startling you. He reaches across you to where his phone lays on the side table, “But babe, you haven’t even seen how cool this place is!” He shoves his now unlocked phone in your face, “See!”

You move back and take Lando’s phone from his hand. You see that he already has their Instagram paged pulled up. You scroll through a couple of their post. 18 holes, Atlantis themed, has an aquarium, good photo opportunities.

“It is nice,” you agree.

“Babe. Please.”

Your resolve crumbles in a matter of seconds, “Fine, but I have 2 conditions,” you watch Lando’s face fall, “1- You will not, and I mean, NOT, do that spiderman-whatever-it-is pose on the course and 2- If an argument or anythings breaks out and we get pissy at each other I get to say I told you so.”

“Deal!”

The first ‘disagreement’ of the day occurred not even 2 holes into the course. Lando claimed that you had purposely aimed for his ugly neon green ball.

“You did that on purpose!”

You stand there with a bewildered look on your face, “Are you kidding me? Your ball is right in the middle of the damn way. Of course I’m going to hit it!”

This is exactly why you couldn’t stand playing against Lando. When the two of you played together against other people, you guys were a powerhouse, unstoppable. Putting the two of you against one another, well the results were what you were dealing with now.

“Lando I swear to God I will leave you here and you can walk home. Remember our ‘deal’? Because I do.” You wave your golf club at him in a warning manner.

“You’re right. I’m sorry baby.”

You sigh out, you could never stay made at Lando when he gave you that puppy dog eyes look, “It’s fine, let’s just try and have a good time.”

The two of you move through the course, you’re keeping score with a baby pencil on the little piece of paper one of the workers gave you when you picked out your balls, not trusting Lando to put down the correct score.

“Awww. Babe, look your favorite food,” You point to the fish in aquarium that lines the next hole.

You hear Lando make a noise and a pinch in your side. “That one looks like you,” Lando tells you as he points to the ugliest fish in the tank.

You ram you elbow back, hitting him right in the stomach, “You ass. Keep it up and you’ll be sleeping with them.”

“Come on, we got like, 7 holes left.” Lando grabs you hand and drags you away to the next hole.

Lando drops his ball on the green, lines up his shot and swings. You watch as the ball bounces off the barrier and rolls right into the hole. “Hole in one babyyyyyy!” He exclaims, club raised over his head. “I’d like to see you do that.”

“Bet.” Is all you say as Lando walks over to hole to retrieve his ball. He moves off to the side and watches as you line up your shot, a smirk resting on his face.

You swing, and your ball does the same thing that Lando’s did, resulting in you own hole in one.

“Hole in one babyyyyyy!” You mimic his early reaction. You do his same winning motion and you watch his smirk fall with a smirk of your own.

The two of you aren’t the only people in here, there is a family a four ahead of you and another couple behind you. As Lando and you are walking to the next hole you can’t help but glance back at the couple, who, unlike you and Lando, are being all lovey dovey. The boyfriend is helping the girl with her swing, standing behind her, holding her hands as they swing the club together.

You nudge Lando, “See we could be like them,” you point to the couple, “instead we’re two competitive a-holes.”

Lando shrugs. “I like your competitiveness, gives me my money worth.”

“Well be sure to keep that mentality after I beat your ass.”

“We still have 3 more holes,” Lando points out.

“Yeah, but with how bad you’re doing, I think I got this in the bag.”

“Don’t count all your eggs before they hatch.”

“Chickens, babe. Chickens. It’s- don’t count all your chickens before they hatch.”

“Wait, then what’s the egg one?”

“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket?” You say unclear to which one he is referring to.

“That’s it!”

You roll your eyes, “You’re lucky your handsome.”

“What?”

“Don’t worry about it,” you pat him on the shoulder and start walking to the next hole.

“No, what did you mean by that?” Lando calls out from behind you and all you can do is giggle.

It’s the last hole and maybe Lando was right, you shouldn’t have counted all your chickens before they hatched. Because the past two holes Lando has managed to get two holes in one, you on the other hand were plundering.

“So, we’re tied right now. This is the last hole, therefore, the tie-breaker.”

“Do you want to go first?”

“I guess.” Honestly no, you didn’t want to go first. You rather watch how Lando does first, then try to replicate whatever he did, your strategy you’ve been using the entire game.

You line up your shot and swing. A very underwhelming delivery on your end. Lando goes and has the same result. Second swing same thing, ultimately closer to the hole before. Lando swings and his ball is just a little behind yours. Third swing, and PLUNK, right into the hole. You hold in your celebration, Lando could still tie. Lando goes for his turn, and he puts to much force in his swing, his ball goes in and right back out of the hole. It’s on his fourth try that his ball makes it in.

“YES! I WON!” Your shout draws the attention of the couple behind you, you give them an apologetic look. You turn your attention to Lando, who is looking at you with nothing but adoration.

“Well done,” Lando gives you a little golf clap and you take a bow.

“I guess I don’t get to tell you I told you so.” You say as the two of you walk in the parking lot hand-in-hand.

“Wow, we actually had a nice outing and that’s all you can say,”

You stop and jerk Lando’s hand towards you, “I had a fun time, even if we did get a little competitive.”

Lando’s hands move to you waist and pull you into a hug, “I had a fun time too, even though I lost.”

“Don’t be a sore loser.”

He wouldn’t say anything today, but maybe sometime in the future he would tell you that he purposely swung a little too hard on his third turn so that his ball would bounce out of the hole. But for now he could live with the little white lie, as long as it made you happy.

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#f1 #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris fluff #lando norris #ln4 imagine #ln4 fic #ln4 x reader #ln4 fluff #ln4

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tnsophiaonly · 2 days

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Uh just a thought:

cw: yandere, cussing, bad grammar, scara being scara, Childe is Childe, fatui, blood is mentioned at least 1 time

Imagine a Y/N\Reader who does everything for their family, so like your brother/sister/mother/father anyone you love!! got super sick and the cure for it is expensive as hell! (8,765,432,765 mora)

So you work for the fatui to get better expenses, you were skilled enough to immediately be recognized by your superiors—ahem, harbingers— and the first one to recognize you was Childe. Childe is just so down bad for you, he loves fighting with you, anything that gets your attention, if he could, he'd always have you by his side when he does missions.

And there's this thing, your fellow friend (who's been to the fatui far longer than you) in the fatui had a gambling habit and would make bets. One time they talked about giving away millions of mora to whoever gets to be The Balladeer's secretary and survive for 3 months.

You, eager for the mora, you immediately did too well, acted like you were obsessed with him to amuse him, did so many things to the point of getting Scaramouche's attention, he finally made you his assistant.

Of course Childe is pissed as fuck. How dare this midget get you before him??!!

At first Scara was just humoring your fake obsessive behavior just for entertainment, telling himself he'd throw you away soon and laugh at your fake reactions.

3 months passed and Scaramouche started humoring another fatui agent in an attempt to get you to break and snap and make you jealous, you used that opportunity to slowly part ways from him. He took a whole week to notice how you were basically disappearing from his life. You didn't leave the work though, you did the remaining paperwork and missions before disappearing.

Scaramouche who slowly notices the difference in his life when you left, you left a great impact in his life. This new fatui agent he humors doesn't do as well as you do, they keep fucking up to the point that Scara doesn't find it funny anymore. Yeah, he admits, your perfectionist personality helped a lot in his work, you were boring yeah, but at least you got the work done! After yelling and punishing the fatui agent for fucking up again, Scara grits his teeth and walks out to cool himself down.

But that's where he saw you sparring with Childe. Childe is out here feeling gleeful that you were finally back to him, while you just went back to him because you are an agent under him.

The sparring ended with Childe winning, you almost won, but Childe was stronger as expected, he walked up to you and almost gave you a kiss before you pushed him away, shocked. Childe frowns, he keeps you caged in his arms, he doesn't care about the dirt, blood, snow, and sweat that mixes when he has you in his arms, what matters is you.

Scaramouche, gritting his teeth in anger and getting more frustrated and annoyed than ever—why is that obedient pet of his with Tartaglia?— he's mad.

You felt that cold and electric glares sent to you, you nudge your head and saw Scaramouche watching the both of you hug with a blank face, fffuck. You were not supposed to be seen by Scaramouche.

And Childe notices it too, he smirks and holds you closer, nuzzling his cheek on your hair.

Scaramouche was about to rush into both of you and demand an explanation, but why does he care? He isn't supposed to care about something like this! He always said he could replace you anytime, but he never said you could replace him.

I want to add more harbingers to this thought, imagine Columbina and Arlecchino 😻

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bella-goths-wife · 2 days

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How would Pet reader and Alastor interact after he returned from his 7 year long absence?

How would Alastor and pet interact after his absence

I assume you mean in the canon au and not the alastor makes a deal with you au but if I’m wrong feel free to request again :)

I’m sorry it’s not much interacting but they don’t really meet much at this point in the story

Warnings: abuse mentioned, obsessive behaviour

After his seven year absence, alastor did try to subtly seek you out

He lingered around where he met you and expected to find you in the same position you were in seven years ago, a starving little fawn on the street who was desperate enough for shelter that you’d be willing to make a deal

But he didn’t find you, not a trace of the little doe eyed fool he had felt such a familiarity with

So he cut his losses for the meantime and decided that he would trouble one of the many souls he owned to stalk you down

So imagine his surprise when on a random afternoon he passed by angel and heard your voice from angels annoying little gadget

He asked for a closer look and there you were, the person who had been on his mind for the seven years was stood with the Vs surrounding them

You looked different though

You were cleaner and more well fed, meaning you had been able to escape the cold streets and found food

But there was a difference in your eyes as you posed with the Vs, there was a lack of something

Your eyes didn’t hold the same curiosity or passion that he knew of the girl he met several years ago who was so eager to learn more about her abilities

You looked like a candle lit flame that was running at the bottom of wick and was being drowned out and smothered by candle wax, your fire was slowly dying inside you

He demanded angel showed him everything out there that pertained to you, and angel gladly did with the small hope that maybe alastor would take enough interest in you to help you

Alastor absorbed every piece of media you were in and every sound you had created, anything that the internet held of you alastor would consume

He observed how the passion slowly died from your face and the years went on, he heard how your music which was once so alive and inventive turn into something generic and easily forgotten

In many ways he prepared himself to mourn the person he had met, he doubted that there was any of you left to mourn considering the Vs had drained your presence of its spark

Alastor felt something he hadn’t felt in a while, he felt pity for you

He heard of the horrifying things your were subjected to on a daily basis and he just couldn’t stop the sympathy from bubbling to to the service

He was no good soul owner himself, he was fairly abusive but that’s only when he had to correct behaviour

He felt overwhelming jealousy and anger at Vox over how Vox had claimed your soul before him and ruined you

Alastor could have made you into something great, something more than a pet to the rich for when they felt cruel or bored

Alastor was almost ready to give up on you and see you as a failed project, but something stopped him

angel had mentioned your acts of kindness towards him and alastor had to hear of your very intriguing presence from Charlie, so he decided to test you before giving up to see if you were worth more effort

He followed you for weeks on end with his shadows, and he saw many things

He saw how your cunning side could slip out when you saw an opportunity to escape a punishment and how manipulative you could be

He also saw how your anger had gotten the best of you on many occasions and watched as your powers manifested into something dangerous, something lethal

He fantasied about making you into a powerful being, someone who could one day be on a level close to his

He wanted to sculpt you like a sculpture and make you into something bigger than the pentagram had ever seen, he wanted to protect you from the past and make you strong enough to protect yourself from the present

He had angel dust sneak into your room and slip a radio under your bed so he could listen in to your surroundings

He heard you be your authentic self without having to water yourself down

He heard your moments of brief happiness and he heard the many overwhelmingly cruel acts committed to you

He heard your sobs and swear for a minute he felt himself grow caring enough to want to comfort you

So he played a soothing song from the radio once you were too distracted by your sobbing, so it could calm you to sleep and at least offer you the minimal comfort he could offer to you

He felt himself growing attached to the idea of bringing you back to the hotel and surrounding you in his arms like a child to make sure you wouldn’t have to see the faces of your abusers again

He began concocting plans to help you escape, and he was determined to one day own your soul so he could sculpt you in his image like he intended to do several years ago

He had never felt himself caring about anyone this much, he had a need to know where you were at all times and even felt himself grow antsy to see you in person and talk with you like you once did

Parts of him even felt a paternal sense of worry and concern over you in a way he’s never experience before

And he was determined to save you from Vox and bring you home

@lilyalone @repostingmyfavs @the-faceless-bride @idontreallyexistyet @hazbinhotelxreader @corvid007 @fandomaddict505 @buttercupfangirl @ivebeenthearchersstuff @sparkleyfishies @perkypeony @rerarlo

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elsa-fogen · 2 days

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i just wanna say first of all. you have been feeding my brainrot for the past month, tHANK YOU for that

2nd of all, do you have any head canons for Al about when he was alive? how do you think the story played out leading up until his death? I personally love hearing ppls takes on this

THANK YOU for enjoying my things ^^ 💖💖

Oh boyy that's a question about human Alastor. That's probably a great opportunity to draw him, huh? But i'M SO SCARED FOR SOME REASON?? You see, i saw many human versions, and very few of them actually looked like Alastor, SOO YEEAHH. I'm afraid to lose his vibe when i make his human form. But OKAY. I'LL TRY.

here we go. You have no idea how long it took for me to make my self to draw this fdolfdljfldsfsd

soo........ is is still Alastor or should i work more on his human design...

btw, guess where did i get colors for his hair and eyes :> (*pointing at myself* hehehehehehrehhwhrhhwhe there)

I don't actully have full story/headcanon for all of his life, but i have some points (tho i'm still ot sure about some of them)

I know that he was mixed, but let's say he also whitepassed for the sake of my own sanity

His first victim was his father, and he was 17 when that happened (his father killed his mother when was drunk)

- Alastor burned his house with his dad inside and enjoyed his screams

After that he faked his age and went to the WW1

He injured his leg there and was sent home (also his eyesight might worsen there)

he's enjoying beating the shit out of people with his cane

I don't have any solid headcanons after that because it needs researching and UGHSHDG i'm so lazy for it... But yeah, he became a radio host, he killed people and he were a cannibal. And then was shot while burring the body. the end.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #the radio demon #radio demon #human alastor #hazbin art #hazbin hotel mimzy #hazbin mimzy #hazbin headcanons #the deer in headlights #sudden ask lol

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mirai-e-jump · 23 hours

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TV Guide Dan Vol.51, April 2024 Issue ft. Sakai Taisei x Higuchi Kouhei Interview (translations below)

Publication: April 5, 2024

UNIQUE

"Could you please introduce the role the other plays in the V-Cinext films King-Ohger VS Donbrothers and King-Ohger VS Kyoryuger?"

Higuchi: Gira Husty, played by Taisei, is a character that has the right characteristics of being a so called main character, and I thought he was a completely different Red from the one in Donbrothers. The atmosphere Gira created was one you couldn't find in Donbrothers.

Sakai: Gira and Higuchi-kun's role of Momoi Tarou are the exact opposite in terms of character design. Tarou is an absolute ruler who brings everyone together, which is different from King-Ohger, where everyone has their own individuality but are still able to keep up with each other. In a way, I also feel "jealous."

Higuchi: Still, I think all Super Sentai members feel "jealous." The Producers and Scriptwriters give other Sentai "colors" we don't have, so it's only natural for us to think, "I like those colors."

Sakai: That's why the history of Super Sentai continues, and the fans enjoy it every year. I definitely wanted a "color" I don't have. That's why I'm happy to have the opportunity to be involved with other Super Sentai members like this!

"What were your impressions of each other before you met? Did your impressions change after meeting?"

Sakai: At first, I thought he was a cool guy, but on set, all the two of us would do was talk!

Higuchi: I felt the same way, and thought Taisei was a quiet guy (laughs). Actually, that wasn't the case at all, as I was surprised and happy to find that we were compatible when we talked in the dressing room. During this shoot, even though I had my own dressing room, I would go to Taisei's dressing room instead.

Sakai: I thought Kouhei was cool and manly, and my impression of his manliness is probably the same as it was before we met. We're similar in that we both get carried away.

"How would you describe your relationship?"

Higuchi: This is just my opinion, but in the context of our relationship in Super Sentai, I'm his senior Red, but in terms of our age, I'm his junior. In my case, regardless of age, as long as there's mutual respect, I want our relationship to be that we're like friends. That's why I unconsciously treated Taisei like he was already my friend. I'm sorry!

Sakai: It was also easier to say things like, "Let's go out to eat." I'm the same as Kouhei, I think it's easier that way. It makes me happier if you come to me without hesitation, rather than be cautious because I'm older than you, I think it makes it easier to talk about the performance and acting.

"Have you seen each other's shows, King-Ohger and Donbrothers? Please tell us about any episodes that were most memorable for you."

Higuchi: I remember very well when the first episode of King-Ohger aired while we were performing at Theatre G-Rosso. We saw it on the TV backstage at G-Rosso, and everyone was envious of it, saying, "It's really cool!" (laughs). I still love the first episode.

Sakai: For me it has to be the final episode, I thought it was really great that it ended with the very memorable, "We've formed a bond." I thought it was nice that it started and ended with those words. It's also easy to use at things like events! It's hard to find a place to say, "I'm going to rule the world!" (laughs). I like the fact that the first episode established the bond, and while the ending came, it was also a beginning.

"Were there any challenging or fun parts during filming?"

Higuchi: Speaking of challenges, the filming location was at the King-Ohger's studio, and it was my first time using a green screen that covered all sides. So, on my first day in the studio, I was surprised and thought to myself, "How do we do this?!" Once you get a feel for it though, you get used to it.

Sakai: Donbrothers was shot entirely on location. On the other hand, we had the pleasure of filming on a set. As for difficult scenes, Kouhei seemed to have a hard time in the scene where Gira choked on some mochi. It's because he had to put his hand firmly in my mouth (laughs).

Higuchi: It was harder for Taisei, wasn't it?! Wouldn't it have been easier to simply put it in? If it were the other way around, I think I would've felt awkward afterwards (laughs).

"What did you feel after watching each other's performance?"

Higuchi: I thought Taisei always took his acting seriously. Also, his eyes are incredibly pretty and distinct. I think he's got alot of strong points.

Sakai: I thought Kouhei was a stoic person in his performance. He spent alot of time thinking on his own, doing things like sorting out his emotions abit before the cameras started rolling. Even after he was given the OK, he studied things from the side the moment after and thought, "I could've done this better," so I respect that stoicism.

"Please tell us some of the highlights this time."

Sakai: They're both Super Sentai with tons of personality that rival each other for first and second place of this generation, so I think it'll be a highlight to see how they'll unite and how the story will progress. Also, this time, both Reds are characters that laugh out loud. Within the battle scene is a scene where the two of us are laughing loudly, and it was pretty difficult to film, so I want you to see it. It was a long scene, about 30 seconds, and we were laughing the whole time (laughs).

Higuchi: It's as if two Super Sentai were combined to form a new Sentai, and I think this is a movie where each member has their own highlights. Also, the King-Ohger's costumes are really cool, so it's worth seeing. Among us, Jiro, the Noto, and Inuzuka's costumes might be as good as the Kings. The other four are in ordinary clothing (laughs).

"You both have experience playing soccer, and you kicked a ball around during the photoshoot, so what are your thoughts on each other's skills?"

Sakai: I think this is probably common in soccer clubs, but I can tell just from the ball rolling alittle bit if someone is "good."

Higuchi: I get that! The moment someone kicks a ball and stops it with their foot, an experienced player can tell that, "This guy's good." However, I'm sure this is a feeling that baseball and basketball teams also have.

"Did you talk about soccer during filming?"

Higuchi: If I'm remembering right, after filming finished for Donbrothers and King-Ohger was about to start, Taisei said to me, "You used to play soccer, didn't you? Let's play futsal!"

Sakai: Right, I just thought since you had experience playing soccer. Futsal is fun, so I'd love to do it again!

"This issue also features Iuchi Haruhi-kun and Hayama Yuki-kun from the currently airing Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger. As their seniors in the Super Sentai series, please give them a message."

Higuchi: The quality of Super Sentai is really different each generation, but I think the one thing they all have in common is that they're "very challenging." That's why, when it comes to acting, I can never say, "It's better like this." The only thing I can think of to say is, "Please have fun in Oizumigakuen, where the filming studio is located." I enjoyed it tremendously (laughs).

Sakai: Right! Depending on whether or not you have fun in Oizumigakuen and at the filming studio, the story could change. The more favorite places and stores you have, the better, and you can go out to eat with ease. As Kouhei said, it's challenging to film every day, so I think it's good to find a place you can "rely on." It'd be nice if after enjoying Oizumigakuen, you go to a different site for another job and end up thinking, "I want to come back here someday."

"And finally, when speaking of Donbrothers, oden may come to mind, so please tell us what both of your favorite ingredients are."

Higuchi: Chikuwa!

Sakai: I love eggs, and I also love daikon radishes!

Higuchi: In the end, which one's the very best?! (laughs).

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doodle-pops · 2 days

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Better Than The Stars

Caranthir x reader

Request: Hi Mina! Can I request a one shot where Maedhros or Caranthir are married after being reincarnated and they're struggling with people opinions about their children (hair color, their patrents past, Fëanor...) meanwhile their wives don't care even more because they're noble and know about their society (plus Nerdandel Is supporting). However lots of fluff and family actitude 🩷 thank you!!!! - @foreverandadaydarling

A/N: A pleasure to create this piece on your behalf dear. Enjoy!

Warnings: female reader, angst, comfort/happiness, reborn!Caranthir, arguments, Caranthir wanting to separate

Words: 2k

Synopsis: There were days when even the great son of Feanor required reassurance that your choice to be a family was genuine and not out of guilt.

Pulling the blanket over your shoulders, you stood in the doorway, watching your husband tediously slave away, attempting to garden. A chore that once came easily during his youthful and glorious years of peace was now foreign and laborious. You would have been fine with assisting him, but quick he was to assure you that you shouldn’t be the only one labouring around the household. Your response? A simple smile and a pat on his shoulders before leaving him to his own devices.

It was now spring, and Arien’s rays were barely peeking through the clouds to relieve the winter coldness. What little crop you two managed to save during the previous seasons was now getting the opportunity to grow. Winter was harsh for you two since you no longer lived in the comfort of your parent’s homes or the lavish life you once did in Thargelion. Returning to Valinor, branded as outcasts or the darkened ones, most of your family turned blind eyes to many of the returned—as did the former servants of his house. Most were quick to beg for forgiveness and repent their rebellion towards the Valar and were easily forgiven; however, their compromise was to never serve under their house again.

You, along with a few of their spouses, openly chose to remain at their sides after their rebirth, believing that if they were given a second chance at life, then there was still good left in them. Unfortunately, your choice of dwelling with him left a stain on his heart when he realised the life you would have to live with him—giving up the lavish treatment you once had.

“Ease up on the hoe—the handle already has a crack, arimelda.” Halting his swing mid-air, he turned to gaze at you with soft eyes, but behind them, you saw the distant look of regret.

Yes, he regretted you being dragged along with him in a swirl of chaos and destruction. He promised you the world when you both wedded and instead, he brought death, pain, and heartbreak. Though you knew the true reason behind his actions, hence the force being placed on the handle with each swing the tool made with the earth.

His children.

Your two daughters became the newest victims of the backlash the House of Feanor faced. A brief excursion into Tirion’s market yesterday left them scurrying back home with tears streaming down their ruddy cheeks, a precious trademark that made them all the more magnificent in their father’s eyes. Keeping the incident a secret from him all day yesterday to maintain peace was broken this morning upon mindless eavesdropping as his girls hush-hushed the harsh words. His first instinct was to fly into Tirion and have his daughters pinpoint the individuals before giving them a good old-fashioned taste of his mind, the classic Moryo style.

Had it not been for his daughters' pleas alongside yours, the House of Feanor would have left another mark on their reputation.

Sharply exhaling and relaxing the flare of his nostrils, he gave a pained smile. “Ah, sorry, I didn’t notice. I’ll fix it when I’m finished.” And yet, his smile didn’t reach his eyes as it once did.

“No need, just go easy on it.”

Offering him a genuine smile, one that reached your eyes, he dropped the hoe.

He still couldn’t understand, to this day, how you could be happy amidst the life he had you living. You deserved the riches he bestowed upon you in Thargelion. Whatever you wished for, he would have been able to grant—be it the largest diamond, a platter of fruits, or the finest material for your clothes. Not this broken life of struggling to bring in a good harvest or being cursed at when you went into town for produce and meat. Even the relationships with a few of his brothers felt strained, the harsh, cold, blank stares you would give them whenever they visited.

You still hated them for persuading him to retrieve the Silmaril, even though you knew he had no choice. You just wished it had come at a later date so more time could have been spent. At least his mother did her best to reach out and act as a guidance counsellor when she could. Her words were harsh at times, despite the honesty behind them and bias towards her sons, giving recognition to her wisdom. But not once had she persuaded any of her daughters-in-law to leave her sons. That was the sole decision she left you ladies to make; your choices were your consequences.

Frowning, deep in thought, he parted his lips to argue. “Why—”

“Don’t, because I will give you the same answer as I always do. I just want to be with you. I’m happy with you,” you reminded with a single huff.

Returning a breathy laughter, wanting nothing more than to scream and yell at the now nonchalant and lackadaisical you were treating the crisis, he curled his fists into his trousers. “Really? Is that the life you genuinely want with me when we have children? If it were you and I, then I would be less inclined to leave, but we have a family who have now become victims! And for what?! Looking like me and coming from this accursed family! This is not the life I want for them and you!”

“Then you would prefer us packing up and departing after expressing your gratefulness upon your rebirth that we stayed?!” you snapped, lowering your tone to prevent your girls from picking up that their parents were arguing.

“Yes! Yes, I would have preferred that instead of having to listen to the vile comments targeted at my children and you!” He shook his head and turned to gaze at the dirt ground. Standing in the troughs he had dug, he felt insignificant for the first time in his life. He felt lost as if his purpose had been stolen from him.

Maybe if I covered myself with dirt and grew, I might be able to start over again? I’d be able to regain a purpose in life.

“Do you genuinely believe I would leave you so easily? Have I not walked through fire and gotten burned to prove my loyalty? Is that not what this family is all about? Do you honestly want to chase us away because of naysayers? I’ve said it time and time again, I don’t care about other’s opinions of us. What happened to the Morifinwë who didn’t care about other’s opinions?”

“He died long ago and has no intentions of returning now that he has children!” He allowed himself to stand there in the dirt and lifted his head to gaze at the overcast above. “You could return to your family, taking our daughters with you, and atone for your actions. You all would not have to struggle or be hated—everyone would adore you all, a life of luxuries and opportunities. You were never hated, always loved, so why do you still stay when the situation shows no sign of bettering?”

If the Arien was out, I’d be able to sprout properly. But even she would not wish to cast her rays upon a person like me—they were too beautiful to be wasted.

Tugging the blanket tighter around your body as a brisk cold wind blew through the garden, you shivered. Listening to the branches quake and shiver from the intensity of the violent wind, you could observe and ponder how long your actions had troubled his mind. He didn’t drop his head from the sky; he kept it facing upwards and left his hands curled into fists at his sides, controlling his temper. Opening his mouth to respond, he quickly snapped it shut, unable to provide an appropriate counter.

It was something he had done less and less since his rebirth. It was the most eerie change in his persona. Gone was the easily angered Caranthir, replaced by a mellowed and soft-spoken person. Still, he’d grind his teeth or grumble under his breath at the hate, but always bit his tongue because he knew it was the truth and there was no point in fighting it. Yet, there was anger behind your decision to remain at his side. You could have left him, never to be heard of again, and lived in a peaceful paradise.

“Because we would not have been at peace if you were not around. To hear our children ask for their father, why wasn’t he coming around or if he didn’t love them anymore are questions I would like to avoid. I want our girls to grow up knowing and seeing you in a different light compared to how others perceive you.” Your voice was soft and considerate, and his tensive posture was relaxed when it reached his ears. “I want them to know that their father was kind and loving, and someone who made an effort.”

Relaxing his fingers from their tight grip, he wiggled them around to alleviate the ache. Lowering his head to your level, he turned to confront you. His forest green eyes pierced into yours, seeking warmth and honesty behind your words. And you allowed him to—there was nothing to conceal. He deserved to witness the truth for himself.

“I want peace and I also want happiness Caranthir. Do you remember our vows, happiness and sows, for better or worse, through the good times and bad? I chose you from the start and I will continue to choose you until the end of time—we will stand with you until the end of time.” Walking out the doorway, you stepped barefoot onto the dirt. Grimacing because of the coldness of the earth seeping through your pores, you continued to walk until you stood before him.

Extending your hand, you tenderly grasped his freckled one and raised it until it met your lips. Returning a smile to him, of which he was unaware, you kissed the back of his hand before reaching your other hand to encircle his waist. Despite the stern and unyielding expression on his face, your actions were the exception that broke the ice, causing him to blush slightly. This was one occasion when he could not deny being captivated by your gesture.

Raising your head to meet his gaze, you captured the longing, desperate reassurance in his stare.

“Sometimes I wonder who is the more stubborn of the two of us.”

“I have never been happier Moryo; you make me the happiest person in the world.” Saying this, you took his hand encased by yours and rubbed it against your cheek before repeating the gesture upon his ruddy cheeks. “Your daughters love and want you in their lives; don’t push us away.”

“Even in this state of living when I can no longer provide the best?”

“You always give us your best.” At the whisper of your words, a warm wind blew through the gardens and wrapped its cool arms around you both, pushing you into one another. Within that moment, two extra pairs of footsteps were heard rushing out the backdoor. Lo and behold, the sight of two miniature versions of both of you came scampering out of the house to rush for a group hug. Never one for missing out on family hugs whenever they saw you both embracing.

The moment they ran out of the house giggling was the moment a flutter of warmth flowed into his heart as he gazed at his two loving children clinging to you both. Their short arms struggling to encircle your bodies as they squeezed your waists tightly added appreciation to the warmth. Arien’s rays took the most opportune moment to shine her light upon you both, encasing you in a swirl of golden light. A light finally shone upon you both, maybe a sign of acceptance or prosperity, or both.

Laughing at the action, Caranthir could not help but gaze lovingly at them, giving their heads small pats and then at you—finally, he was seeing the honesty and beauty behind your words in your eyes. Choosing him wasn’t out of sympathy or shame, it was all love and contentment.

“Then I will continue to give you all my best meldanya…for staying at my side.”

“You are all that I need.” Pulling him closer, you rubbed his nose against yours and gently pecked his lips before grinning at his blushing face.

“Can I have a kiss too atya?”

“Me too, I want a kiss please!”

With a smile emanating from the depths of his heart, Caranthir gazed at his girls tip-toeing with their lips puckered for their kisses and chuckled. Some things truly never change.

Top of Form

“Alright, line up for your kisses!”

Masterlist

Taglist: @lilmelily @ranhanabi777 @rain-on-my-umbrella @mysticmoomin @asianbutnotjapanese @sakurayaxd @batsyforyou @involuntaryspasms @ladyenchanted @hermaeuswhora @aconstructofamind @stormchaser819 @addaigio @lamemaster

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rippleberries · 2 days

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Jeffrey Combs, lovable but irascible

[BEGIN TRANSCIPT]

JC: You know. Hey! In a Gelson's I saw DeForest Kelly, I did the same thing. I went, "There's fucking DeForest Kelley! One of my favorites! Man there he is!" But I'm not going to walk up to him, and uh. I think at that point I had done maybe one or two Deep Space Nines. What am I gonna, "Hi, uh, err, M-Mr. Kelley. You know I'm on Star Trek, too!"

[laughter]

JC: It just seemed so, like, no.

MODERATOR 3: I have sort of an esoteric question.

JC: Okay.

M3: This is going back to, you know. When you watch the original shows, are there any characters that you would have wanted to play? Whether regular characters or, you know, guest stars.

JC: That's really a good question. Like, who do I relate to?

M3: Yeah.

JC: In those shows?

M3: Who do you think you, who do you think you could have--

JC: Who would I have been cast in? Well, I shudder at that idea because I don't know if I would have been cast with any of them. But maybe Bones.

M1: Yeah

JC: Maybe. And I have to tell you, I sort of had an opportunity to sort of exude that kind of demeanor when years later I was a series regular on Transformers Prime. Because I played Ratchet, and Ratchet was the medic, and he was irascible but lovable.

M3: Yeah

JC: And that, and I think that's how I got the job. Because I didn't really know anything about Transformers when I auditioned for it. Okay, I didn't. But I made a choice, it was very, very DeForest Kelley. And it's kind of irritated but lovable, and you know he cared, but he had an edge. So in a way--

M3: He's gonna save your life but he's not going to be happy about it

MODERATOR 2: America's space dad

JC: And he can be annoyed with your bothering him, but he's also, you know, kind of happy that you're paying attention to him. You know this kind of duality that great characters have.

[END TRANSCRIPT]

#jeffrey combs #deforest kelley #transformers prime #ratchet #ratchet tfp #star trek tos #leonard mccoy #it is weyounsday my dudes #galaxycon

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zu-is-here · 2 years

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Commission for @armethaumaturgy! ★ Thank you a lot for your support╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

EXE was Cross until he ended up stuck in the white remains of XTale that glitched him out. After losing his speech and memories, he goes around the multiverse looking for Something and controlling other sanses to fight for him. He ends up sticking with Dust he hacked — a puppet named Code 51...

#zu art #zu commissions #EXEption #Code 51 #execode #cross!sans #murder!sans #utmv #undertale #undertale au #the first ones are here! (๑>◡<๑) hoo bois—#the moment I saw them I realized they're gonna occupy something more than just a canvas (๑･̑◡･̑๑)♪#should I even tell about the X-cellent design? *w*#a great opportunity to work with it <3

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today-in-the-devildom · 4 months

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A special message from Lord Diavolo!

As another year draws to a close, I am here today to express my thanks to all of you. To the humans and angels whose fate has been forever intertwined with that of the Devildom, as well as each and every demon that has ensured their survival up to this point.

First, I would like to address our dear guests. Over the life of the exchange program, you all have become inseparable parts of the Devildom. I am forever grateful to each and every one of you and I cannot wait to see how you will continue to change this realm for the better. Not only have you proven yourselves as worthy representatives of both the Celestial Realm and human world, but the Devildom has also found strong allies and precious friends. And for that, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

As for my fellow denizens—I know that a lot of you had their fair share of doubts when I first announced opening the Devildom to the human world, but especially to the Celestial Realm. Demons and angels have been at odds with each other ever since the beginning of time, so the idea of inviting them into our land must have terrifying. I sincerely hope that by now, I have managed to take those fears from you, and instead let you believe in my vision of the future.

However, it is not me who deserves credit for the success of the exchange program, but all of you, my dear denizens. You are the ones that have welcomed them into our homeland with open arms, that have looked out for them as if they were family, and most importantly, you are the ones that forged bonds with them so strong that they will last a lifetime. Know that it is all thanks to you and your hard work that our exchange students are able to celebrate this day with us—unharmed and alive.

Each and every single angel, human and demon has played a vital part in the success of the exchange program, and I hope you are as proud of all you have achieved as I am. I realize that we still have a long road ahead of us before we can truly claim the Celestial Realm, the human world and the Devildom to be united. This has merely been the first small step. But regardless, I am certain that one day, this will be more than a mere dream just beyond reach.

Let us contiune to bridge the gap between our realms so that some day soon, we may all stand hand in hand as we bathe in the light of a brighter future we have all shaped together!

-December 29th 2023-

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Edit: thank you again 🌲, I dedicate this entry specifically to you💜

#barbatos made him cut the “unharmed and alive” part </3 #anyway once again to forest anon: THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOU 💜💜💜#my idea was dia thanking the exchange students for all the opportunities of bringing the three realms together so when i saw your idea of #dia thanking the demons for not killing the exchange students i was screaming because it just fits in perfectly #great minds think alike hehe #obey me #obey me nightbringer #today in the devildom #diavolo

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alittlechildforever · 6 months

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Musical Saw

I wanted to write a fanfic for Chants of Sennaar. I only used he/him pronouns but let's say that their languages have no gendered pronouns.

The five representatives of the Temple's peoples were gathered in one of the anchorites' rooms, in the devotees' lands. A bard, the Director of the theater, had called a meeting. The Director stood in front of the screen, which currently showed a saw and some sort of curved stick with a taut string.

The Priest, no, the new Preacher was hoping that he was not expected to know what the curved stick was. The Director was utterly silent as the other representatives gathered. He seemed tense. When he began to speak, it was with utmost seriousness.

It immediately turned out that the Preacher's worry was for nothing, as the Director began explaining what a saw and the stick - a bow - were for. In detail.

The Preacher decided to forgive the Director the long-winded explanation when it looked like the anchorite genuinely did not know what a saw was for. The peoples of the higher levels, it seemed, were a strange bunch. He was not sure if the alchemists' Professor was also ignorant or just enjoyed listening to the lecture. The explanation of the 'bow' was a little more interesting. Bows were an old weapon for launching projectiles, like a slingshot but for longer distances. The warriors did not prefer projectile weapons, but some kept up the practice as a hobby and to brag about their skill.

"Years, Traveler has?" asked the Director to the anchorite- the Traveler's Creator. The Preacher blinked at the change of topic. The Creator anchorite also seemed to take a second to adjust. Then he spoke.

"Zero years. Five months."

"What?!" the warrior's Commander exclaimed. "He is a baby?!" Or spoke. In the Preacher's experience, the Commander was not a quiet man. In this case the Preacher forgave the volume, because what?

The Creator anchorite seemed perplexed at the reaction.

"The Traveler is not a baby. I created him for the mission of uniting the Temple and reviving my people, and all the skill he needed for that he had from his first waking moment." The Creator anchorite paused for a moment. "He did not have knowledge, since every attempted creation I simply gave knowledge to did not work, but I gave him curiosity, and he got all the knowledge he needed in days. He is not a baby."

"Baby, he is not. Child, he is," said the Director. "Playing, he likes." The image on the screen changed, showing the Traveler holding a saw and bow.

Ah. So it was about the Traveler the whole time.

"Days ago, an old saw, he found. Toys, he made. With his devotee friend, he played. Then, funny sounds, the saw made, when it, his friend shook." (Then his friend found that the saw made funny sounds when he shook it. I wanted to keep the grammar as close to bard language as possible. Sorry if it's hard to read.) "When hit while oddly bent, even more interesting sounds, the saw made. A bow to hit with, they found. Like this, the saw sounds now."

What proceeded to play from the sound-boxes was the most haunting noise the Preacher ever heard. It sounded almost like a wordless voice. It sounded like mourning. It was beautiful... except for the odd screeching sounds in some parts.

The Director faced the Creator with utmost seriousness.

"Your child, you will stop. Please."

#my writing #Chants of Sennaar #my fic #This is not great but there is so much opportunity for having a musical saw in here #This is just a fic to put a ton of Sennaar headcanons into #Also Traveler and friend found an alchemist to make rosin for the bow #if Traveler is technically an anchorite child then the musical saw is truly a joint product of all five peoples #Also I sort of want to name the Traveler changeling since he is a fairy child

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foxgirlmoth · 6 months

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Imagine being one of the most well known trans streamers (at least that I've ever heard), being allowed to afford for pretty much whatever affirming care you want, and then making fun of another trans women for.... Being a trans woman. And then you throw a hissy fit when people say you're shitty for that. Like damn you have so many people going to bat for you for being a piece of shit to someone else in your own community, you can afford to do this, and then you just say you're not 'quirky' enough to fit in with us. You're just being an asshole. Trying to say 'normal' trans women don't exist is pretty fucking disgusting.

#I went and looked through the blog cause I was real curious #And just holy shit #They're throwing around 'awww people on tumblr have piss poor reading comprehension 🥺' and while that is often true #I feel like that phrase needs to be taken away sometimes because if 90% of the people who saw your post went #'WOW what an asshole!'#I think you may be a piece of shit #Like damn I wish I was quirky enough to get a good enough following on Twitch I could sustain myself and also get surgery!#That'd sure be great!#I'm glad she got that opportunity but I think she doesn't realize that is EXTREMELY fortunate #She is one of the most privileged trans women I've seen on here and she uses that to be an ass half the time

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bookrat · 1 year

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Went on a camping trip down to south Florida, starting in the everglades

We were looking for snakes and American crocodiles, but we did find this day moth and tree snail

Plus a couple nocturnal critters settling down for a nice days sleep

Lots of high quality birds in the swamp

Saw frigate birds in the Dry Tortugas, but they mostly hung motionless and effortlessly high in the air like low poly videogame background birds

Had to flee back north early ahead of Nikole. Managed to catch a glimpse of this bark anole when we stopped for breakfast, but all the iguanas were hiding.

Tons of introduced rock agamas calling this gas station home, and a nearby rooster hung out with a flock of grackles. Was hoping to see more exotic reptiles around Miami, but perhaps another time.

#long post #travel log #now I'm sick #gonna be so mad if I dodged Covid for 2 years and finally lost because of a trip centered around outdoor activities #The Dry Tortugas was great but not really full of photography opportunities unless you like ruins #Previous hurricane destroyed a lot of plants so he was just like #pls don't step on any of my plants I don't have many left #There was a full moon so we couldn't see the stars except surprise there was a lunar eclipse actually #no light pollution so we saw the milky way and a shooting star that shattered into fragments as it burned up on entry #also #apparently a lot of Cuban refugees land there so the head ranger guy didn't know much about the wildlife so one got the impression #that tourists were an unfortunate inconvenience for him personally when he had a lot of other stuff more important to be worrying about #I don't think many would want to come here if America lifted the embargo strangling their country #so we just invent a crisis for another independent country because Communism Bad #and then treat the poor folks fleeing the conditions we created like criminals #all because if a country was doing even moderately okay without capitalism it'd be bad for the shareholders I guess #anyway the fort was cool but I don't know how to photograph ruins well

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lavenderjewels · 2 months

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brings me joy to see fanart of hana. she is funny!!

#I’ll always be her defender #writing wise it’s a disappointing and bad choice for gege to write hana and by extension angel out #when there’s SO much there that was skimmed over the second they failed to kill sukuna #and for what? because Hana’s missing an arm?? even then there could be more dialogue between characters or angel flashbacks #but that aside fans also say the worst shit #that typical thing where a teenage girl is kinda cringey and silly. then suddenly there’s people ripping her apart for being annoying/whiny #same w the fan polls where i saw comments saying maki and nobara being low is bc jjk is bad with women #and yes it absolutely is bad in that department. but that is Not why inumaki or naoya place so high above 😭#I’m glad there’s more love for Mai too. she falls into a similar place as hana where she doesn’t have a huge role #and there were missed writing opportunities (although I think Mai’s presence is pretty great tbh)#but fans overlook everything (and esp. their relationships and trauma) and just call her names #that’s enough of my monthly rant where i want to vent a little about characters deserving more from fans and the creator #look all I’m saying is if inumaki can have such a huge fan base just bc people like his design #then why not hana!! she has an interesting backstory - is funny - AND has amazing fashion

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shallowrambles · 3 months

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I actually think the Benny in Dean's Werther Project hallucination was truer than Dean's idealized recollection/memory of him.

And deep down, even though he rejected it for self-preservation, Dean knew it. That's why his anxiety manifested the way it did in the first place. TLDR: It's alllll about Andrea.

A lot of this is redundant, but here ya go.

Benny was acquiescing of the execution of corrupt loved ones. Blood Brothers is a crucial Benny episode. It's illuminating...and unflattering.

Reality check? Benny was mostly okay with "a sacred executioner (Dean)" doing the painful dirty work so he didn't have to. Benny might also be particularly sympathetic to monster-suicide, as that's what he chose for himself.

Benny directly showed us in-canon that he was resolved to kill even his most beloved "corrupt family members"--like Andrea Kormos. She was quickly deemed too far-gone and corrupt, nevermind that their conversation was too short, too condescending, and too aggressive on Benny's part to explore meaningful change and solutions.

So yeah.

I think the real Benny might be totally game for Dean killing himself so his loved ones didn't have to. Especially if Dean himself posed a risk of doing harm/attacking said loved ones, as Andrea Kormos did when she attacked Benny.

That was the "real" Benny all along. And that hurts.

///

Benny didn't try to convince Andrea. He instantly judged her, offering no validation of the emotional struggle with addiction or alternative way forward.

Benny believes in sparing loved ones the task of killing their corrupted loved ones. He was part of practicing it with regards to Andrea. See below:

ANDREA takes his hand, but stays where she is. ANDREA: Where, Benny? BENNY: What are you talking about? Anywhere. [ANDREA looks down.] You're not leaving here, are you? And you never were.

So, yeah. Okay. He's clocking her intentions here, but he's also doing a lot of heavy lifting assuming her thoughts, ascribing the most uncharitable mode to her motivations. (Using an always-and-never statement to boot.)

It comes off so condescending. It's an accusatory mode of communication.

He jumps straight to the vibe of, "you never wanted to leave here, you're corrupted!" whereas her "Where, Benny?" speaks more of desperation and fear. (It reads to me more like: "How, Benny? Why should I fight what I am, Benny? I can't do this, Benny. Can't fight this. It's too hard.")

But he...doesn't seem interested in helping her rediscover herself. He doesn't validate her feelings or illuminate a path to redemption using his own past sins to help pave the way.

He doesn't even talk about another way forward. (Nevermind that he himself did some pretty awful crimes on the high seas for decades before "redeeming" himself. (Rules for thee, but grace for me?)

ANDREA: We have everything we need right here. The operation is still perfect. We can ride the high seas, plunder together. We can have the life we always wanted. BENNY: What I wanted was to leave a burning crater behind. I wanted to put your memory to rest. ANDREA: But I'm not a memory. Benny, I'm right here. BENNY: What I loved – it ain't here anymore. It was snuffed out a long time ago by monsters like me... like what you've become.

I just want to emphasize how this conversation is barely a conversation. It's an attack on Andrea before a real conversation can even begin to take place.

The mere act of being afraid of leaving, of having Stockholm Syndrome and losing her "father," of feeling connected to the Easy Mode of vampiric hunting is met with an over-the-top attack on her character.

(You're not you. You're corrupt. You've become like me, because of me, and I don't want you anymore. You're dead to me if you're like me. You can't be redeemed...even though *I* was.)

It's a flagrant dehumanization.

///

What could he have said? Is this a tonal argument?

I guess it could be if you squint, but he directly insulted her, denying her existence to her face. That's why she reacts with a desperate, "Benny, I'm right here."

She's not a memory. She's monstered.

He could start with acknowledging how hard it is to be a 'human-ethics-centered’ vampire. He could share his own struggles. Show some empathy, or at least some sympathy! At bare minimum, he could discuss a new way forward. ("Anywhere," isn't a discussion.) Instead, we get...zilch.

He's much too busy being horrified by the apparent corruption of The Perfect Woman.

He goes straight to the vibe of: "you're an irredeemable monster."

///

Is it worse to go too far...or not to try at all?

And here's where the Sam-Bobby-Dean triad of demon detox takes on a more positive light. Their methods may have been cruel and harsh. (Detox is an ugly, horrific, twisting, screaming-and-lying thing. Detox tells you that drug dependence is who you are. It tells you you like the disease. That you perhaps ARE the drug/disease).

But anyway, Bobby-Dean-Cas did not give up on "corrupted/addicted/overly righteous" Sam.

Likewise in season 10, the methods of Sam-Cas-Charlie were evil, but they did not give up on "corrupted/disinhibited/unfeeling" Dean. Although Sam and Cas started out being resolved to kill Dean, they realized they couldn't. Wouldn't. (In season 10, perhaps Sam is in his mind resolving not to trigger the abandonment Dean got so unhinged about in season 8.)

So I guess the question is, what's more evil? In SPN, is it worse to go too far...or to barely try at all? They're both bad, perhaps, but one is driven by hope, and the other by nihilism: "we're all damned."

Benny’s arc is rooted in nihilism from start (Andrea, revenge) to finish (torn apart in Purgatory, as he probably intended to go out).

///

I think Andrea's feelings were obviously hurt; she was insulted...and with very good reason.

I mean, it's no wonder she attacks him. She cries, "You think you're better than me now?" He says he thinks they're all damned, and that certainly enrages her.

She senses, perhaps correctly, that it's really just lip service.

His actions imply that he really does think he's better than her. He did crimes and got redeemed. She's not even gonna get that chance. Not really.

(She has the "chance," I suppose. Technically. Sorta. But he purposely agitates her with his nihilistic lamentation of man-woe, spending much of his time judging her, not trying to convince her.)

You see, even when he messes up, Benny still "gets to be" himself. Even if that's a corrupted vampiric self. He's still "Benny." Not Andrea. When Andrea is a struggling addict, a vampire, Andrea "just is a memory."

Andrea is immediately disallowed her own identity simply for voicing that it might be easier to stick to the vampiric ways of hunting to live. It's black-and-white, abruptly cruel judgement, even before Dean gives the killing blow.

///

Later in the season, via deleted scene, Benny completely falls off the wagon, insisting "Dean doesn't wanna know (about his feeding off innocents)."

Benny is a symbolic perfectionist here. (As Dean himself can be when it comes to hero-worship and people.) Benny wants to remain idealized, just like he wanted Andrea to remain idealized. They're eaten alive by the symbolic, cooing Empty: "Wouldn't you rather remain a fond memory than a constant, festering disappointment?"

Benny's okay with that. And in the end, Dean's okay with that, too. That's why both Amelia and Benny feel like mirages. If Benny is "away," Dean can fantasize that maybe Benny got to be “King of purgatory,” and most importantly, Benny gets to live in the idealized space Sam could never live up to: "brother who never let me down."

(Dean is struggling to cope with life in this season. I think his hero worship of people is something he tends to do to help combat the abandonment he feels is inevitable. And yes, as I've said before, I think this is because John was a hot-and-cold caretaker!)

The deleted scene implies that Dean could perhaps be content not knowing all the ways Benny fails to live up to the cartoon of Benny he's drawn in his head (as a means to cope with the disappointments of living). Benny was good because he was at arm's length, not close enough to wound, hurt, or disappoint. And as Benny's organ donor/blood donor/drug dealer, there's a comfortable dependance Dean can fall back on, giving him control and feeding into his specific brand of abandonment-neuroses.

Benny never clawed his way back the way other characters did, because the writers decided to strip away his complexity and cut out the meat of him. Give me the guy who fell off the wagon. Give me the guy in The Werther Project. That's the real Benny, and he's great. He's, to quote Amara, better than the false ideal. He's real and complicated.

As for Andrea's redemption, perhaps in Benny's mind, if Benny's not *immediately* enough on his own to change her behavior by *checks notes* coming at her with the least charitable assumption and denying her personhood, then she's a Lost Cause (TM). If Benny's not enough for her to change, as she was enough for Benny to change, then "no one/nothing is."

So, he goads her with harsh, black-and-white words. "It was snuffed out a long time ago by monsters like me... like what you've become." I.e. I'm a monster reformed, but you're a monster that deserves to die before we even validate your pain or talk about the chance of recovery/healing. (You were ruined/corrupted by my father in our game of war. Ouch.)

She is hurt and ofc attacks, and the sacred executioner (Dean) strikes her down (so Benny doesn't have to).

It's also potentially a kind of family annihilation/self-nihilism. That in Benny's mind both he and Andrea deserve to die for being "damned." (Indeed, Benny will submit to his own murder with nary a complaint.) I think this latter one is perhaps more charitable, that Benny was always in a bad place--suicidal.

Again, Benny’s dependence on Dean as drug dealer was comfortable for Dean, allowing him to both keep Benny at arms’ length/not let him close enough to be de-idealized and hurt him the way his family and loved ones have, while at the same time being forever on the hook of blood donor/organ dependency (the symbol of the in 8x03 cooler). Benny’s life on the show was like Benny’s death: a figurative open door that you never intended to open. And Season 8 is all about surreal, idealized figments.

ANDREA: You think you're better than me now? BENNY: No. I think we're all damned. ANDREA snarls and her fangs descend. DEAN stabs her from behind and then cuts off her head. BENNY and DEAN look at each other before BENNY looks down at ANDREA’s body.

Anyway, that's why I wanted Andreas Kormos for Purgatory II. I still do.

I was also so partial Andrea's rage, disappointment, and confusion. I wanted to see Andrea versus Benny. At minimum, I wanted Andrea back as The Stockholm bookend to the Nihilism, even if Benny was ripped to pieces (as his nihilism would predict). Andrea still had a will to live, even if it was evil/vampiric, and that's far more interesting to me.

///

All in all, it would be completely in-character for the nihilistic Benny we got to know to be comfortable seeing Dean go the way of a corrupted Andrea. We didn't see Benny’s nihilistic worldview develop or shift in a meaningful way during the course of the show. Indeed, his nihilism actually became more severe the longer he drifted.

If "one friend" (Dean) abandoning him and some hunters tailing him is enough to get him to fall off the wagon, he had a very tenuous grasp on resilience indeed. We should all support one another and not seek to violently undermine (Hi, Sam), but at the same time we are not responsible for another person’s addictions.

Benny can be an off-key parallel like how Sam sometimes shifts the burden of his "wellness responsibility" to others? (The Benny-as-idealized-surreal-brother and Sam-as-real-imperfect brother hits hard. Benny’s addiction is excused and enabled as necessary; Sam’s is framed wholly as a choice, which...addiction is complicated. We're much less kind to family about it.)

All in all, I think it's foolish for Dean (and the audience) to think that Benny would treat Mark of Cain!Dean in any way meaningfully different than he treated Andrea Kormos.

Dean's hallucination in Purgatory was more in-keeping with what we saw out of the real Benny. The box knew that Benny was in fact the most likely of Dean's friends to argue for suicide, and it was probably uncomfortably right about that because Benny did not arc towards growth on any occasion. Dean's self-soothing narrative was the false one. Hopeful, maybe. But false.

Makes you wonder if the killing of Andrea was something that was subconsciously actually haunting Dean in a very real, gloriously complicated way. (The way I think Cas's taking of a human vessel subconsciously haunts in him 14x10 Nihilism).

I think Andrea haunts him especially in light of his own newly devolved disinhibition/loss of free will/corruption.

(The real Benny wouldn’t encourage a friend to die? We saw him do just that: tell someone they were too gone…and then watched Dean kill her so he didn’t have to.) Deep down, I think this is an example of Dean’s anxiety over the reality of what happened with Benny and Andrea. Charitably, he’s not seeing through an illusion so much as choosing to live for himself in this moment! Which is fine. We all need our fictions.

Disclaimer: I like Benny. I think all of this makes him crunchy and interesting. And it makes him make SO MUCH SENSE. He, like so many many characters in SPN...fell to nihilism. :(

#complex benny #idealization of memories #dean rewrote the narrative to self-soothe ofc because that's what dean does #like how john rewrote his memories of his loved ones in glorified two-dimensional perfection - fond memories can't let you down #but then...that's how grief works i suppose #so many of the characters devolve to honor killing + worrying that their loved ones should *at least die human* so it's not unique to benny #but this episode of benny's is so underanalyzed and it paints benny in a pretty unflattering light if you ask me #from just his conversational style with andrea *alone*#and yes he's a minor character who barely appears and is thus underwritten by design but this andrea storyline always gave me a big think #i believe in redemption but *saving sam* wasn't enough to redeem benny in my eyes - he had other issues #*shrugs* if you happen to chafe at seeing benny as anything other than perfect then you're perhaps buying INTO dean's lie/ idealization?#and i saw his returning to purgatory an opportunity to give into his own nihilism rather than being about The Cause (or dean or sam)#benny's sort-of a surface-level nice guy. i don't think that's in doubt.#BUT his achilles' heel is his own naval-gazing nihilism/misery...and that he perhaps idealizes ppl worse than dean does?#to me andrea just seemed far far more interesting. and sexier to boot. ANYWAY--#why is dean so shocked that benny was torn apart? that was benny's GOAL. dean missed the nihilism and self-annihilation all along?#not a great look for dean tbh #Unlike Sam Benny worked to save Dean’s happiness (Cas)#and that seemed to have a huge impact on dean #whose happiness never mattered #all the same they killed andrea…benny’s happiness wo even trying #so in a sense dean becomes like sam #neither seeing benny as real person struggling w nihilism #not a person who gets to be de-idealized #he gives up on andrea too quick bc benny’s happiness is not as important #benny gets the narrative dean treatment #BY dean #benny’s mental health catches dean off guard the way dean’s poor mental health surprises sam #the dean who raised me would never give up etc #the depth of person of character of emotions

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