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#i know the perks of being a wallflower though
catastrxblues · 3 months
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BESTIE!! can you recommend me a movie? i want to watch something tomorrow while doing some homework or after them!!! 🤭💕✨
OH MY GODD IM HONORED??? wait sorry if i’m late but here’s somee!! (also sorry if this is bad, i’m always so scared to recommend any piece of media ever so i tend to go overboard with it 😭)
so my personal favorite movies to play in the background while doing some work are before sunrise and catching fire -> which i know you lovee too. i’ve literally done this sooo many times to the point i could almost memorize all the line deliveries and i loved every second of it!!!
i know that you love disney channel (and i was a dc girlie tooo), and i saw that you’re going to rewatch the hannah montana movie soon, and so may i present : lemonade mouth <33 don’t know if you’ve seen it but I USED TO LOVE THAT MOVIE SO MUCH the songs!!!!
alsoo. again you’ve probably seen these, but clueless & 10 things i hate about you could def work too!
i don’t really know what you’re looking for right now or if you actually dislike any of these 😅 but these are what comes to my mind rn, so if you actually want anything specific lmk! 🫶🏽 (and good luck on your homework <3)
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edwardslostalchemy · 1 year
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So my friend wants to go watch the new kny movie that's coming out next weekend. So he gave my other friend and I homework: to watch kny so we could understand what would happen in the movie when we go see it. I got him into bnha so i think it's fair that he gets me into a series he likes (but not fairy tail ...... anything but that). I didn't expect for the explanation of watching the movie to be. Confusing? He gave me 2 options. Either finish season 1 and jump straight into the movie. Or watch the first 2 episodes of season 2 and then watch the movie. I figured out there's a 3rd option: watch season 2 episodes 1-7 and you basically watched the movie. My friend, who is going to start the series is confused about this, because she said she would only watch the seasons, but not the movie. And that's where I was like Now see you gotta watch it bc it's part of the plot. This is actually important to the story. You cannot skip the movie. And if she did, she'd miss out on the best Hashira besides Tapioca. I went into the series blind, which is honestly the way I like it (unless there's like sexual assault/abuse...then I would appreciate a huge heads up). My friend is going into it with a lot of information but she's having a problem with processing it. Hopefully, I am explaining things better. It is a very good series and I hope she's able to get into it. That way, our friend group can like bond over a series we've all watched.
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in-my-feels-probably · 11 months
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Home - Benedict Bridgerton x Reader
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Request: Have you considered Benedict falling for a friend of Daphne's? Like if they're as close as Pen and Eloise but maybe with a little less drama? I think it would be funny for Benedict to ask for advice on how to talk to her and Daph being done. Just "you've known her for as long as I have."
Hi! Thank you again for the request, this is such a cute idea. I hope you don’t mind, but I made the reader a Featherington. I went a little off track too, it was easier for me to write that way. If this isn’t what you were looking for, I’m happy to take another request or alter this one. Sorry for the long wait on getting this out, but I hope you enjoy this :)
(Warnings: insecurity, middle child trauma, nothing else i think? idk, let me know if i missed anything)
Living in Grosvenor Square certainly had its ups and downs.
On one hand, you were mere steps away from your best friends. The Bridgertons lived right across the street, and you could visit them practically whenever you wanted. On the other hand—the not so nice hand—your family is the Featherington’s. Which isn’t an inherently bad thing. You loved your family, and could ignore most of the negatives. It just certainly has its pitfalls, being a Featherington daughter.
The Featherington’s—while rich and somewhat dignified—aren’t considered to be the most respectable of families. There wasn’t any one main reason why members of the ton didn’t much like your family, they just didn’t.
It wasn’t a personal grudge with you they had. In fact, you were quite liked by the ton.
More often than not, however, they didn’t pay much attention to you. It was easy to forget you were there when the rest of your family was the center of attention.
You were born soon after Phillipa but before Penelope, making you a middle child.
Your Mother seemed to connect with her eldest far more than her youngest, and that put a strain on your relationship. Not only that, you were much more akin to Penelope, having a lot more in common with her than your older sisters and your Mother combined. You were a bit of a wallflower, like Penelope, and it was a hard trait for your Mother to get past.
It wasn’t all negatives, though.
One of the biggest perks of being a Featherington was the fact that you lived directly across from the Bridgertons. You had spent most of your life over at their residence since the day you developed the ability to walk.
And, subsequently, the ability to walk across the street.
Violet Bridgerton’s first girl—Daphne—was born right around the same time as you were, and she decided Daphne was going to need a friend. Being the first girl born to a family of three brothers was a challenge, and Violet thought it best that Daphne should be able to socialize with a girl her age.
By the time you were both able to talk, you became inseparable. Just as your sister Penelope had come to develop a deep friendship with Eloise Bridgerton, you had come to develop your own with Daphne.
And by extension, you became good friends with her eldest brothers.
Anthony was the oldest, quite a bit older than you. He was already a handful of trouble by the time you showed up, and he already had plenty of practice teasing girls with his sisters as victims. In your first few years, he’d make it his mission each time you visited the house to fluster you, and annoy Daphne. It was harmless fun, and it never really bothered you, although he tried his hardest nonetheless. But as you got older, he became quite protective over you. It was like you were another sister to him, and you definitely bantered and squabbled like siblings do. As annoying as he could be, you loved him like a brother.
Colin was a similar story, although you saw something more to him. It was easy to, with the way Penelope talked about him endlessly. She could ramble for hours, making you listen to every painstaking detail. You definitely understood her affection for him, though. He’s charming and kind, much like his other brothers, but he’s also fun and witty. Daphne tended to favor him the most. They were closest in age, after all. Between her and Penelope, you spent quite a lot of time with him, and you certainly enjoyed his company.
But—besides Daphne—you enjoyed no other Bridgerton’s company like you did Benedict’s.
Benedict was different. He was more.
He was just as kind and charming as Anthony, and just as witty as Colin—certainly as annoyingly beautiful as Daphne—but he was more than that, too. He was sensitive and sweet, far more so than the rest of the Lords of the ton. He was passionate about art and love and valuing the little things. He didn’t care about marrying the prettiest girl for advantage, or inheriting her dowry. He cared about pursuing his dreams, and inspiring others to do the same.
Just the way he talked about his passions and values was enough to make any girl swoon, and yet he was still genuine with his words. It wasn’t for flattery or manipulation, he meant every word. Everything he did, he did for himself and the people he loves.
If it weren’t for Daphne currently holding the number one spot, you’d consider him your best friend.
He’d consider you the same.
You spend just as much time with him as you do with Daphne, and over the years, he’d come to cherish your company.
You saw him for him, not for his title. You listened to his endearing ramblings about his passions because you genuinely enjoyed hearing about them, not because you felt obligated to listen. You treated him like a person, not a prize to be won. It was all he could ask for in a best friend.
But that’s just it. That’s all you were to him. A best friend.
He was so sure that was all you’d ever be. Perhaps one day you’d be his sister in law, considering how close Penelope and Colin had gotten. You’d be family, and that was alright with him. It was what he expected. And then the unexpected happened.
He started falling.
The first time he noticed his feelings for you had shifted was the evening of a ball the Queen was throwing.
You’d come over early to get dressed with Daphne, wanting to help make sure she was perfect. She had finally revealed to you her ruse she was sharing with the Duke, you being the first person outside of their agreement to know. You were shocked at first, but as you listened to her speak, you gave her a knowing smile.
“You love him.”
Her eyes widened in shock, her cheeks blushing a rosy pink. “What? Why would you say that?”
“You love him,” you said again, smiling gently at her. “I’ve never seen you speak with such passion. With the way you talk about him, there’s no other possibility. One couldn’t possibly think that highly of another without feelings being involved—”
“You speak of my brother like that,” Daphne interrupted, chuckling when you swallowed your words.
You chose to ignore her statement, continuing to advise her on the best course of action for how to get through the remainder of her agreed upon days with the Duke. If the way he looked at her without her knowing was of any consequence, you were sure he felt the same way about her. All she had to do was make him see that.
When it was time to leave for the ball, all the Bridgerton’s piled into carriages. Daphne was hurried out the door, and she left with her Mother and Anthony, leaving you behind. When you tried to head back home to be escorted by your family, Benedict stopped you.
He had opened and closed his mouth a few times before he was able to choke out any words. Normally, he found it pretty easy to talk to you. But for some reason, the sight of you standing by his front door made his knees weak.
“I’m afraid they’ve already left,” he finally said, stopping you at the door. “They must have assumed you’d be accompanied by us.”
You groaned, feeling a pit form in your stomach. “I have no other way to get there. I promised Daphne I’d be there for her. Pen, too. She seemed quite nervous about attending tonight.”
“Not to worry,” he smiled, offering you his arm. “You can ride with me.”
You sighed in relief, thanking him profusely. “Well, aren’t you a lifesaver? Thank you, Benedict.”
“Of course,” he nodded, helping you into the carriage.
As you settled into your seat, a thought occurred to you. “Benedict…why are you still here? Not that I’m not grateful, but I don’t understand. You’ve been talking about going to the palace for days to see the Queen’s gallery. I would have expected you to be the first one out the door. But here you are.”
He was quiet for a moment as he took in your words, his eyes softening on you.
There were many things he could have said to you to easily explain it away. I’ll see the gallery soon anyways, or, I promised my Mother and yours that I’d make sure you got there safely. Numerous excuses he could have come up with to satisfy your curiosity, and yet, all that was coming to mind was, I can see the gallery another time, but I may never get to see you alone and sitting in front of me looking this beautiful with your undivided attention again, and I won’t pass up on the opportunity for anything.
“I don’t know,” he finally said as he shrugged his shoulders, feigning innocence. “But here I am.”
He didn’t truly acknowledge his feelings for you until months later, after attempting to ignore it for so long.
The second time he noticed was when he found out that the only reason he got into art school was because Anthony made a sizable donation to the Academy.
You had found him alone during yet another ton gathering, sulking on the edge of the party. Daphne had already gone home to Simon, and wouldn’t return for some time. Besides Penelope—and occasionally Eloise—Benedict was one of the only people you actually liked enough to be around. And seeing as both Penelope and Eloise were nowhere to be found, Benedict was your only hope.
You just hadn’t expected to find him nearly in tears, anxiously tugging at the cufflinks at the bottom of his sleeve.
It didn’t take much to get him to spill, and you found yourself pulling him inside to keep him away from prying eyes while he was in such a state. He told you all about Anthony’s meddling, and you knew it had crushed his heart to find out that he hadn’t actually achieved anything on his own.
“I know he did it out of the good of his heart…but I wish he hadn’t done it at all.”
He brought his hands up to cover his face, groaning into them. You reached for his wrists and tried to pull them away, but he wouldn’t budge. He finally relented when you said his name softly, letting you take his hands in yours.
“Benedict, it doesn’t matter how you got in. You’re an incredible artist, that’s all that matters,” you said softly, squeezing his hand in yours.
He shook his head, sighing in frustration. “I’m not. My work is child’s play compared to the other artists at the Academy. They all knew why I had even been given a spot in the first place. I’m an imposter, Y/N. A fraud. It was humiliating.”
“That’s a bit dramatic, darling,” you lightly chuckled, your smile fading when his defeated look didn’t waver.
“Alright, that’s it. Fess up. This can’t be all that’s bothering you. I know you, and I know you’re not one to give up that easily. You’ve been flustered all week, so what is it? You can tell me. Not that I have anyone to tell, but I won’t tell. I promise.”
His eyes softened on you as you spoke, and you could feel his grip on your hand get tighter. “I just…I’m tired.”
“Of what?”
“Of being second.”
You frowned, swiping your thumb across the back of his hand. “I don’t understand.”
“It’s just something Anthony said,” he murmured, keeping his eyes on your joined hands. “How I may be the second son, but that it doesn’t mean I am any less required to do my duties to the family. It’s rich coming from him. I’ve been second to him literally my entire life, and he’s only recently started taking his role seriously. I’ve played Father’s role since his passing. Isn’t it just my luck that he’s getting the credit for it?”
“You may be second to him in birth, but that is the only way you’re second. You’re every bit as good as him, Benedict,” you said firmly, but you weren’t sure if your words were sinking in.
He was uncharacteristically quiet, though his grip on your hands hadn’t wavered. His eyes were still on the floor, and his shoulders were shaking as he took uneven breaths.
“I know what that feels like, you know,” you finally said, making him glance up at you. “I’m a Featherington. A middle child at that, and it’s no secret my Mother favors my older sisters.”
Benedict let out a small laugh, shaking his head. “She’s wrong to. I don’t mean to be rude, but you and Pen are worlds more interesting and gracious than your sisters. The eldest, at least.”
“You don’t even know them,” you said in shock, but you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing, too.
“I don’t need to. You’re the only one I’m interested in knowing. Middle child or not.”
You couldn’t help but smile, although his kind words weren’t enough. The more you thought about just how second to the world you were, the more your smile faded.
“It’s not just being the middle child,” you continued, speaking softly. “I love your sister more than almost anything in this whole world, but I have always been second to her, too. She was the diamond of the season the second she was let out of leading strings, and now she’s my Duchess. I’m so happy for her, but it does put a damper on your confidence. Watching your best friend grow into this person everyone loves, and it’s like she didn’t even try.”
“Y/N—”
“Sometimes I feel awful, thinking this way. I know she tried, I was there for her every time she’d get overwhelmed. But she made it look so easy. I don’t know how she did it,” you rambled, taking a shuddering breath as you stopped yourself from speaking.
Benedict’s eyes softened on you as you spoke, making you want to shrink away from his gaze. He was being kind, and you didn’t know if it was genuine or not. If he was faking it for your sake, that was much worse than his actual pity.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make this about me, let’s get back to you—”
“Y/N,” he said again, this time effectively silencing you. “You can’t possibly feel that way.”
It was your turn to look at the floor. “Why shouldn’t I? It’s true.”
“That is the furthest thing from the truth,” he said gently, taking your hand. “You’re every bit as good as my sister. I know she makes things look easy, but she spoke just as highly of you as you do of her.”
You raised a brow. “Really?”
“Really. She used to tell me how kind you were to her, even after Lady Whistledown printed her supposed scandals. You were never judgemental.”
“I have no right to judge anyone, especially not her. She’s never said a bad thing about anyone, it isn’t right that people just took a scandal sheet as truth. And, if anything, she was kind to me. She, Eloise, Colin, and you are pretty much the only members of the ton that treat me like a normal person and not an outcast because of who my family is.”
Benedict smiled, squeezing your hand. “I would never dream of treating you any other way.”
You fought the flush that crept up to your cheeks, feeling the heat settle in them. You cleared your throat, shaking your head.
“Anyway,” you smiled, meeting his eyes. “I don’t mean to keep you away. Should we go back to the party? Someone may be looking for you. You’re quite popular, you know.”
Benedict couldn’t help but smile. And as he watched you look up at him through gentle eyes and an open heart, he couldn’t bring himself to move. It was like his feet were stuck to the floor, and he didn’t want to do anything to pull them up. He shook his head, keeping his hand in yours.
“No,” he finally answered, taking a seat. “Let them look. I’d much rather spend my evening with you. If you’ll allow me to, that is.”
You shook your head, taking a seat next to him. “I’ve got nowhere I’d rather be.”
The third time he noticed was when you, Daphne, and he accompanied Penelope and Colin to promenade throughout the square. She and Simon had come to visit, and she wanted to spend time with you and her family.
This time, he couldn’t ignore his feelings.
You followed behind Colin and Penelope, giving them enough room to speak privately without feeling like their older siblings were on their backs. You smiled as you watched Penelope look up at him, Colin being as gentlemanly as ever.
“It took him long enough,” you said, making Benedict chuckle.
“I thought he’d never figure it out.”
“Me either,” you agreed, grinning as you watched Colin smile down at your sister. “I should bash him over the head. I’ve listened to Pen spend countless hours rambling on about how utterly oblivious Colin can be. He owes me a debt.”
“He isn’t the only oblivious person I know,” Daphne piped in, making your eyes widen.
You had told her countless times about your feelings for Benedict, and how he never seemed to reciprocate them.
What you didn’t know is that he had done the same, on more than one occasion going to his siblings for advice on how to address them. Pushing them down until he couldn’t feel them seemed to be working, at least until now. And as far as he knew, you didn’t reciprocate his feelings either.
“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said nervously, silently pleading with her to drop the subject.
“Neither do I,” Benedict added, making Daphne chuckle.
She just grinned, ever so slightly raising a brow. “I mean Anthony, of course. It took him quite a while to realize that what he felt for Kate was much more than rivalry. I practically had to beg it out of him.”
“You’re a little matchmaker, aren’t you?” You asked, smiling at her. “Who’s next? Eloise, perhaps?”
“Perhaps…you?”
You immediately stilled, making them stop, too. “Me?”
“Don’t look so surprised, Y/N. You’ve been my best friend for ages, and I know what’s good for you. You’re lonely. And as awful as it is, the ton will start to talk. If the only people you talk to outside of your own family are Benedict and I, they’ll begin to notice.”
You frowned, nodding. She was right. Harsh, but right. The threat of becoming a spinster was looming over your head every season, and it had only gotten worse after Daphne married in her first season. Your second season came and went, and you were now in your third.
Without any prospects.
And it was looking like your baby sister was going to beat you to the punch as well. You were silent, a small frown on your face.
Thankfully, Benedict broke the silence. Just the thought of you marrying someone—especially someone who didn’t deserve you—made his skin crawl. He felt like he could keel over, and by the look on your face, he could tell you were feeling similarly. He couldn’t keep himself from turning you away from Daphne’s advice.
“Why settle?” He asked cautiously, giving you a sympathetic look. “Don’t let the ton pressure you. You’ll know when it’s the right time.”
You had fully made it around the square, now back in front of your house. Penelope was saying goodbye to Colin, at least for the moment. His Mother invited you and Penelope to dinner to welcome Simon and Daphne home, and so they’d see each other again in mere hours.
You gave Benedict a grateful smile, nodding. “You’re right. Thank you. If you’ll excuse me, I think it’s time to pull our siblings apart before they actually become attached at the hip. Mother wants us home before we join you later.”
Daphne chuckled, taking your hands in hers. “I think you’re right. I’ll see you soon, dearest.”
You squeezed her hands in yours, before going to gather your sister. You gave Colin a knowing smile, turning and heading inside with your sister in tow. The Bridgerton’s did the same, filing into their house one by one.
The second Benedict shut the door behind him, he collapsed against it, groaning. “What was all that for, Daph?”
“What? I was simply giving you both a little nudge. God knows you needed one. You’re even worse than Colin was, brother.”
“I don’t need a nudge. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”
Colin laughed, taking off his coat as he headed up the stairs. “I could hear your stuttering. It was laughable.”
“Oh, piss off,” Benedict pouted, waving away Colin as he chuckled the rest of the way up the stairs.
Daphne offered him a small smile, letting out a sigh. She took his arm, leading them to the sitting room. After promptly sitting down, she gave him an expectant look, and he reluctantly sat next to her.
“Out with it,” she urged. “Why did our conversation with Y/N bother you so?”
“I don’t know,” he huffed, shaking his head.
Daphne narrowed her eyes, speaking gently but firmly. “You do know, Benedict. Admit it. You feel something for her.”
“Does it matter? She doesn’t feel the same way.”
“How could you possibly know that?” Daphne exasperatedly asked, nearly bursting at the seams.
She knew of both your affections for each other, and yet, she couldn’t bring herself to tell either of you about the other. It didn’t feel right, going behind the other’s back. She had decided the moment she knew of each of your feelings to let the matter run its own course. What she hadn’t anticipated was it taking this long.
It was getting near impossible to keep the secret, and she decided a little meddling was excusable.
“She’s never said anything to me that would allude to her feeling anything for me. What would you have me do? Ask her directly?”
“There’s an idea,” Daphne shrugged.
Benedict sighed, trying to shove down the anxiety he felt at the thought of confronting you. “You saw me out there. I wouldn’t even know where to start. How do I talk to her?”
“You’ve known her as long as I have, brother. She’s your best friend! Just talk to her. She’ll understand, I promise. She won’t hurt your feelings if that’s what you’re worried about. You know she won’t.”
“Then why do I feel like I’m going to be sick at the mere thought of talking to her about it?”
Daphne smiled, her eyes softening. “Because you love her.”
Benedict’s shoulders fell, like Daphne just saying it out loud was the first time he was admitting it to himself. Like his feelings hadn’t fully sunk in, and now they were hitting him all at once like a freight train. It was a realization for him, and it both excited and terrified him at the same time. His emotion was clear on his face as his mouth fell open, making Daphne’s smile widen.
“Don’t worry, brother,” she reassured him. “It will all work out. I truly believe that. Take the afternoon to yourself, and keep your mind off of it till dinner. You’ll know the right thing to say when it’s time.”
That evening, you returned to the Bridgerton’s residence with Penelope.
The family gathered in the sitting room before dinner was ready, but Daphne pulled you away before you could follow. She took you all the way to the backyard, sitting down on the swing. She motioned for you to follow, and you took a seat on the swing next to her.
“I wanted to apologize about earlier,” she said softly. “I saw your face, I know I upset you. That wasn’t my intention, and I hope you can forgive me.”
You shook your head. “Don’t apologize. I needed to hear it. I might not like it, but I needed to hear it.”
“It hurt, Y/N. You don’t have to minimize that to spare my feelings. It’s alright to admit it. Do you…do you want to talk about it? I think there’s something more to it that’s bothering you, love.”
She was right.
Of course she was, she was always right. You sighed, turning to look back through the window into the house. You could see Penelope standing with the rest of the family, laughing at something Colin was telling her. He was smiling down at her like she had hung every star in the sky, just so he could have the chance to watch them sparkle. It was beautiful.
And it was painful.
“I just,” you started, keeping your eyes on Penelope. “I’m happy for her. I’m so happy for her. But I’m feeling a bit left behind.”
Daphne took your hand, leaning closer. “What do you mean?”
“I feel so selfish saying this, but…it’s what I want. She’s getting all that I want. All my life, I’ve wanted what you and your family have. You’re all so loved, and you love each other so deeply. Pen deserves that, I want her to have that. And I have no doubt that by the end of the season, she’ll have it. She’ll marry Colin, and officially be a Bridgerton. Part of the family. But she won’t be mine anymore. And I won’t be hers.”
Daphne frowned, squeezing your hand in hers. She turned you to meet her eyes, giving you a knowing look.
“I have a feeling this has more to do with a certain brother of mine. And I don’t mean Colin.”
You frowned, and she knew she was right.
“This is about Benedict. With Penelope being with Colin, it’s a reminder that you’re not with him. And you want to be with him.”
You couldn’t deny your feelings any longer. “I do. God, I really do. But it’s more than that. I want to be his family. I want to be your family.”
“And you’ve had to silently watch Penelope get what you’ve been waiting for,” Daphne said in realization, her heart breaking when you nodded.
Daphne stood up, pulling you with her. She wrapped you into a tight hug, refusing to relent until you hugged her back. You sighed in frustration, letting her gently rock you back and forth.
“Y/N,” she said softly, pulling away. “You’re already my sister. Regardless of who you end up with, whether it’s my brother or not. Wherever you end up, it doesn’t matter. You will always be my sister. You never have to worry about that. Not ever.”
You smiled softly, squeezing her hands. Just as you opened your mouth to speak, a throat cleared behind you. You quickly turned to see Benedict standing at the door.
“Mother told me to come collect you both. Dinner will be soon. Daph, Simon is asking after you.”
Daphne nodded, turning back to you. “Come along, then.”
“Actually,” Benedict interrupted, his eyes falling on you. “Could I have a moment alone with Y/N, please? If it’s alright with you.”
“Of course,” you said nervously, nodding towards Daphne.
Daphne smiled, nodding back. She patted Benedict on the shoulder as she headed back inside, closing the door behind her.
When she was gone, Benedict gave you a sheepish smile. He motioned for you to sit down, and you took a seat on the swing. He sat on the swing next to you, turning his body so that he was facing you. His knees brushed yours as he settled.
“What is it?” You asked, giving him all your attention.
“I just wanted to make sure you’re alright.”
Your eyes softened on him, and you laid your hand on his arm. “I’m alright, Ben. Better now, since you’ve arrived.”
“Cheesy,” he smiled, but his heart was fluttering in his chest. “You know how to make a man smile, don’t you?”
“I didn’t think I was doing anything in particular,” you shrugged.
Benedict’s smile widened, and he couldn’t help but ponder his feelings for you. From the moment he found you alone on his doorstep, to when you took care of him at his lowest. From the way you treated his family, to the selflessness you never failed to put before your own wishes. From the way you made him feel, to the way he so desperately hoped you felt. He couldn’t stop himself from confessing, hoping his words wouldn’t come back to haunt him.
“I have to tell you something,” he murmured, taking a shuddering breath after he realized what he said, and what he was about to do.
You nodded. “What is it?”
“I think—and in case this is a huge mistake on my part, please forgive me—but, I think…I think I’m in love with you.”
You stiffened, standing up from the swing. “What?”
“I,” he stuttered, standing up as well. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was—”
You cut him off, taking his hands in yours. “Say it again.”
Benedict’s eyes widened, and you had caught him at a loss for words. He felt like you had punched him in the gut, sending him to his knees. But he nodded, squeezing your hands in his.
“I love you,” he said again, softer this time as he looked at you through gentle eyes. “I’ve loved you from the moment you got into that carriage with me, and I’ve loved you every moment since. I love you.”
Your shoulders fell, and you could feel the tears welling in your eyes. You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, clinging tightly to his hands. You felt like your knees could give out, and the only thing holding you up was him.
“You’re not lying? You’re serious?”
Benedict almost laughed, nodding. “Yes, Y/N. I’m serious. Do you really think I would jest about this?”
You couldn’t help but laugh as well, bringing a hand up to cover your mouth. “All that time. All that time, and you couldn’t tell me? You certainly waited long enough.”
“I’m afraid I don’t understand, darling,” he said, cocking his head in confusion.
You were starting to worry him now, concern written all over his face. It made your heart clench in your chest.
You smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck. You were so happy, you couldn’t help but hold him close, smiling wider when you felt his arms wrap around your waist, despite his confusion. You held him tight, standing up on your toes so he could hear you loud and clear.
“I love you too, Benedict.”
He instantly pulled away, holding you back at arms length. “You what?”
“I love you,” you said again, taking his hands. “And I’ve been waiting ages for the day you’d finally tell me you felt the same. I never thought I’d hear you say the words, but I am so happy that you did.”
It was his turn to ask. “You’re serious? This isn’t a joke?”
You shook your head, and he squeezed your hands. You brought one of your joined hands up to press a kiss to the back of his, smiling up at him.
“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my entire life.”
A/N - Hi! I’m so sorry this took so long, it took me a long time to figure out what I wanted to write. Not sure why this one was so difficult, but I finished it! I hope you enjoyed it :)
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milswrites · 2 months
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Can I have this dance?
~ Azriel X Fem!Reader
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Summary: Lovingly trapped in a moment on a roof in the Rainbow, you and Azriel take advantage of the little time you get alone, enjoying your evening together until dawn makes her appearance.
Warnings: Just cuteness!
Notes: Don’t know why this made me feel homesick for a place that isn’t real. (I definitely didn’t base this off the song from High School Musical 3 👀🫣)
Life couldn’t get any better than this. You had just shared in the most magical evening with Azriel. The delectable meal at his favourite restaurant , secretly hidden down one of the narrow, twisting streets of the illuminated city. The blissful walk along the Sidra, hands entwined and swinging between you as you spoke about everything and nothing all at once. Then finally to end your evening the perfect view of the rainbow, enjoyed only by you and the shadowsinger, hiding away on the roof of Feyre’s studio, not yet wanting the most wonderful of nights to come to an end.
So here you were, sat together on a blanket Azriel had materialised from his shadows, your head resting against his shoulder as you admired the scene. Eyes closed softly as you appreciated the humid kiss of the evening breeze against your cheeks, ears perked as you listened to the bustling streets below. Friends laughing with friends as they crawl out from the rustic bars, ready for an exciting night ahead in the clubs of Velaris. Artists calling out enticingly, attempting to squeeze in a few more sales from the interested public before they packed up for the night. Velaris was a city full of life. The rising of the moon, and the dotting of twinkling stars appearing in the inky sky, called its people from their homes like a sirens song.
You and Azriel had always been wallflowers, preferring to sit back and absorb the moments you were in. So being here, sat only with each other for company on the silent roof, heightened senses taking in the sights, smells and sounds from the streets below, was your idea of heaven. You mainly sat in comforting silence, though Azriel occasionally released a low rumbling laugh from his chest, pointing out a poor fae who had drank a little too much and was struggling as they stumbled wildly down the cobbled streets. Or you would gasp in adoration each time a dog ran by, tongue hanging out as its tail wagged happily. You were watchers and this was the perfect place to observe.
Hypnotised, you were unsure just how long you had been sat there entwined together, the night sky being your only guide as to what the time was, hundreds of stars now shining in the night sky. The vendors had all taken their leave, wheeling their lightened carts away as their places were taken by musicians and performers seeking to make a few coins and share their passion with the keen citizens of Velaris, who were all too willing to stop and watch as if they had all the time in the world.
Which it felt like you did, you and Azriel sat here on the roof trapped in your little moment with no concept of time. It was almost as if you were merely figures in a painting. Too enticed by the transfixing tug of the city that was Velaris. The only thing that could ruin your enjoyment would be the rude interruption of dawn breaking, and so until then you would absorb this picture in its entirety.
The wind carried a melodic tune from the streets which you overlooked. The airy whistling of a flute accompanied by the harmonic pull of a harps strings. It was the type of music you liked to imagine the gods would listen to, the skilled musicians drawing all kinds of emotions from you through their beautiful symphony.
Azriel, who had always been appreciative of good music, softly hummed along to the tune, his voice beautifully harmonising with the notes from the instruments below. Captivated, the song made you sway softly, continuously brushing against the shadowsinger’s shoulder as you did so.
Gleeful giggles joined the orchestration, you could almost feel the vibrations of the joyful sounds as the wind gently blew them towards you. Curious, you moved from your comfortable position to lean over the edge. Still humming contentedly, Azriel absentmindedly shot out a reassuring arm to hold onto your own, ensuring that you wouldn’t topple over the ledge, interrupting the magic that was being produced below.
You peered over, merriness filling your eyes as you watched couples, both young and old, joined together in an enchanting dance. Arms embracing their lovers as they swayed to the mesmerising tune.
You squealed at the sight, hopping excitedly to your feet as you wanted nothing more than to do the same, Azriel lurching forwards in fear at your sudden movement. The male stilled as he saw you were alright, eyes glancing in confusion to the open hand you were holding out for him to take.
You chuckled at his furrowed brows marring his handsome face, his thoughts still lost to hypnotising rhythm of the music. “Dance with me” you grinned, waving your arm about energetically as impatience flooded your system, wanting to start the dance before the melody came to an end.
A matching smile crossed his face as he placed his hand in yours, “I’m not much of a dancer” he nervously mumbled, afraid to disappoint you with his skills, or lack thereof. Mustering all the strength you could you pulled the male up from the floor, “it doesn’t matter Az, all that matters is you, this. Right now.”
You raise your entwined hands just as you saw the elder couples doing below, resting your head on Azriel’s chest as you wrapped your other arm round his muscular back, the male following suit and doing the same to you.
Taking the lead you began to sway in time with the tune, taking small steps which Azriel copied, his eyes locked onto your feet to ensure he didn’t step on them. Briefly, you removed your hand from his back just to take him by the chin and move his face to meet yours before returning it to its original position, his golden-amber eyes which were fogged by lust meeting your own.
Gaining confidence as his eyes bore into yours, Azriel began to guide you, steps widening as the two of you began to move around the roof, spinning together in broad circles, allowing the moment to take over and let your bodies do all the work. He raised your joined hands, allowing you to twirl under his arm, being mindful not to bump into his wings which were slightly curled around you both in your embrace.
You moved fluidly, two shadows dancing together under the moonlight, the powerful music controlling your movement. It was an elegant mess of unplanned yet coordinated spins and dips, Azriel doing whatever felt right at the time, allowing his instincts to work for him. He drew you into a deep dip, your back arching over his supportive arm as he did so before lifting you back up and spinning you in a circle once more, pulling you close to his chest after you were steadied on your feet.
Beginning to run out of moves, both your arms drifted up his body until they locked around his neck, his own hands coming to rest at your waist. You resumed the gentle swaying, head pressed against him feeling the vibrations in his chest as he once again began to hum the melody as you moved.
You continued this dance until the music began to fade, still making the small steps even after the last note rang out through the wind, too enthralled by this perfect little scene shared between you. Enjoying the rare time you get alone when you are both off work and aren’t joined by your family - as much as you loved them.
And so the dance didn’t end with the song. The sound of your steady steps against the roof echoed until dawn finally made its appearance. The two of you still tangled in your enveloping embrace until the sun had long since risen. Allowing your perfect night to carry through into a beautiful new day.
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Notes: literally had this idea and wrote it in an hour as I was just too excited
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My Problematic Girl - Chapter 1
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Character: College!Steve Rogers x Rich!Female Reader
Prologue:  Steve has lived being nobody in this prestigious university. He just wants to graduate and get a job to get more money to pay the bills for his mother's surgery. 
But his life turned upside when a new student attended his class. His quiet and dull life became dangerous and full of surprises.
×××
She exhaled the cigarette smoke from her lips. She still doesn’t care even though he told her he has asthma. 
She looked at Steve and said, “Bark for me.”
Steve felt humiliated, and his pride was crushed. But she held his life and secrets. He had to bury his dignity to the ground, and he murmured, 
“Woof.”
******
I would appreciate any comments and feedback you can give me. 
If you want to be tagged in this series, please tell me.
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5 , Chapter 6 , Chapter 7 ,Chapter 8 , Chapter 9,-
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Pine trees, old gates, red bricks, this is the same view Steve saw every day for the past two years at Stark University he attended as an art student. 
He always remembered the moment he got a scholarship and was accepted to this prestigious university. 
It was the first time he felt alive. 
He thought when his problem with tuition had been solved, he could enjoy being a university student compared to high school. 
But it turned out to be the same. Every student here is super rich; they come to uni with their sports car, or their driver drives them to uni. 
They live differently from Steve, who has to work different types of part-time jobs to get more money and pay hospital bills for his mother. 
On the first day of class, the way rich kids look at Steve when they see him walk into the class, they know he doesn’t have the same life standards as them. 
Steve tried to be friendly with them; they were nice at first. But he realised they were using his talents to do their work. They treat him like, ‘It’s a privilege to hang out with us; you should be grateful.’
Since then, Steve decided it was better to be a loner. With only eight months left, he will graduate and no longer have to meet these people. His footsteps stop in front of the class door. 
"Did you watch the game last night?"
"You bet, and guess what? I sat with the club owner."
“Girls, my dad got us the ticket for that concert.”
That’s what Steve heard every day in his class. He couldn’t join the conversation because of his financial status. 
Steve took the headphones from his pockets and put them on his ears. No one even bothered to say Hi when he walked into the classroom. 
That’s good because if one of his classmates greets him, they want Steve to do their work. It’s better to be invisible or a wallflower. 
He went to his table, dropped the old canvas backpack, and took out the sketchbook. 
Since Steve was a kid, drawing was the only way for him to escape from reality. He forgot how his abused father, sick mother and snobby classmates were.
While drawing, Steve heard one of the female students start gossiping. One of the nice perks of being invisible, he could get a lot of gossip in this university.
“My father met the chancellor yesterday and heard a new student will join this class.”
“Before one semester to graduate? That’s unbelievable, but how?”
“I heard she’s close with Tony Stark. I guess one of his young girlfriends?”
“No, euuh.”
All the gossipers start laughing like they are better than anyone. But Steve agreed with one thing, what kind of person could attend a class last semester?
Suddenly the class door opened, and it was Prof. Abraham Erskine; before he walked into the room, he turned back and signalled, ‘Wait’. 
He put his documents on his table and looked at his students. “Guys, you have new friends. Please be nice to her, alright?” 
“Yeah.”
“Perfect.” Prof.Erskine clapped his hands once and waved his hand towards the person behind the door. “Come in.”
The rumour is true; a new student is joining the class. 
Everyone could see her arrogant attitude when she walked into the room. 
But the way she dressed from head to toe took the attention of every female student. 
One of the females who sat in front of Steve whispered to her friend, “Did she wear those shoes to class, and that watch… cost more than this class tuition.”
“Who is she? If she were in the socialite club, I would’ve known.”
“Her name is Y/N L/N; starting today, she will study with us until last semester.” Prof.Erskine looked at Y/N and said, “Please be nice and don’t make trouble in my class.” 
Everyone gasped when they heard their Professor beg this one student. 
“Shit, she’s that bit*h.”
Steve turned to one male student who immediately closed his mouth. 
“Who?”
“Remember that chaotic night at the H club? She kicked one of the guests to the table. She didn’t even apologise and continued her drink.”
“Ohh, I heard a drunk guy won't leave the female guest. She kinda helps the victim.”
"I remember she went to the same school as me. She kicked a teacher to the window and threw the table at him."
"She didn't get in any trouble?"
“Her father is the CEO of a Law Firm."
"Her parents gave her a penthouse, and I heard she always held amazing parties."
"That's cool. We should ask her later to hang out with us."
Steve shook his head; how fast their opinion changed when they knew she had money.  
Prof. Erskine didn’t bother with his students, who kept whispering. He told Y/N, “You could sit near the window with that boy. His name is Steve.”
Y/N nodded and went to the chair where the Professor pointed his finger. Everyone in the class stops talking and watches her whenever she walks. Their eyes are looking in Steve's direction. 
Their gaze made him nervous; today was not his lucky day. He lowered his head and continued sketching. 
Nothing happened when she sat beside him. Steve thought he had to greet and introduce himself. But it’s unnecessary because she grabs a tablet and wireless headphones and starts playing games. 
Everyone widened their eyes; the audacity of her being impolite and arrogant was on another level.
What Steve had in mind, ‘Ah, another rich kid.’
Professor Erskine didn’t even bother; he opened his laptop and set up the projector. “We will continue the study of Leonardo Da Vinci of his … … …”
Steve looked to the front,t but then he glanced at the new student. Before, she played games, and now she reads online comic books.
'Wait, did she read it from that website?'
She looked at him and caught him off guard. Steve nodded his head and looked back to the front. His face felt hot because that was embarrassing.
After the class ended, the first person who stood up after the Professor left was Y/N. A few people tried to approach her, but Y/N replied to them by saying, "Get lost."
Steve was confused; on the first day, Y/N had started to make an enemy. She could quickly join the clique if she wanted to, but it doesn’t seem like she cares.
‘Bzzt.’
Steve opened the message on his phone that said, “New 24 pages. Do you want to take the job?”
He immediately typed, “Yes.” It's an offer for extra money; Steve wouldn't say no. 
“Steve, I have to talk about your final project.” Professor. Erskine asked him. For their final, every student has to make an exhibition. Usually, universities will provide a warehouse for students. 
But now their curriculum has changed; the uni wants the students to find the place for their exhibition independently. 
Almost all the students have no problem with this except Steve. He couldn't even afford his rent. How can he get money to rent a place just for one day? 
That's why Prof. Erskine asked Steve about a sponsor. 
“Have you found the sponsor?" 
"Not yet, sir."
Steve gulped, he wanted to ask, but he didn't know anyone willing to give their money to sponsor an art student.
Prof. Erskine sighed. "I hope you will find a sponsor during the winter break, Steve. I know you will." He carried all his stuff and left the classroom. 
Steve sighed heavily; he wished he knew one person with money. 
Then he saw the new student, Y/N, looking at his sketchbook. He grabbed the book from her hand. 
“Ah, sorry.” He wanted to scold her, but Steve didn’t expect her to apologise. He put the sketchbook into his bag and gathered all his stuff to leave. 
“Wait.”
Steve's body stopped when he heard that. Then he saw Y/N grabbed her wallet and took an old photo. She shows it to him. It's a small photo in black and white colour, the paper also being crumpled or folded many times. When he saw it, he noticed the woman in the photo looked like Y/N. 
“Could you draw her to be 40 years old? In this photo, she’s 25 years old. I saw your drawing. The way you do the shadow and wrinkles is nice.”
Steve doesn't know how to feel since he never got a compliment from his classmates. 
“You won’t do it for free, of course. I will pay for it. Please?”
Steve takes a good look at her face. When she talks like this, it doesn’t seem like the same person from the class. And she asked nicely, and she was willing to pay. 
“Ok.”
“Great, I will give you the deposit first.” She took $200 hundred from her pocket and handed it to Steve's hands. 
His hands tremble because his drawing would only cost around $75. This money is enough to pay for groceries for a month. 
"Uhm, it's too much." Steve felt guilty if he took the money. He handed back the money to her. 
His act made Y/N quiet for a while; he thought she was mad at him, and she probably felt offended, but instead, she said, "No, for her, it's worth it."
When she said those words, Steve could feel the sadness in her voice. He doesn't know the meaning behind the story, but he will do his best to draw the photo. 
"I will finish this in 3 days."
"That fast?"
Her question made him curious, is she an art student? 
"Are you-?" 
"Y/N!!!"
Before Steve asks her, someone yells her name. He turned back and saw the chancellor of Stark University, Tony Stark. 
It's difficult to meet him, even though there are only two places to find him: the engineering lab or a nightclub. He's a famous playboy but also a genius. 
So, to make him come by to this building is fantastic. And he's here for Y/N. 
Is the rumour true that she's Tony's side chick?
"Nice to meet you, Steve. See you tomorrow."  Y/N smiled at Steve and went to Tony. 
He saw both of them walking together. Perhaps the rumour may be true. 
Steve shook his head; it was not even his business. He should go home quickly and start drawing since he got two jobs today. 
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When he gets home, he turns on his old PC, grabs his drawing tablet and opens the storyboard he received. 
Steve clicked his tongue; as a freelance artist, he can't say no to his client, but his morals get tested every time he gets a new storyboard from the client. 
His work is drawing for Hentai comics. Some people see this as disgusting, but some people will like it. And Steve works with the people who are willing to pay. He will receive any request from the website called www.readwithme.com
This is the biggest secret he kept if anyone from the university knew his work. He could get dropped out. He even kept it from his best friend, Bucky. 
He carefully picks a secret name and uses another email so no one will figure him out. His ID is VioletDust18. 
Many people have read his works and subscribed to the story. He doesn't get paid much, but it's enough to pay the bills and rent...
He already got the rough sketch and opened the reference to start drawing. Steve didn't feel aroused when he looked at the photo or storyboard.
When the clock showed 9.00 p.m, Steve finished three pages. He stopped when he felt hungry. He opened up his wallet and saw $200. Today he will order a food delivery to treat himself, and tomorrow, he will buy groceries. 
Suddenly Y/N appeared in his mind. He is grateful that she pays more than enough. But one thing that worries him is that she opens the website with Steve’s artwork. 
She seems like not an art student. She probably wouldn't notice. 
Yeah, it's better if she didn't notice, and after he's done with her request, she will ignore him.
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Thank you for reading. I hope you like it.
If you have any feedbacks or want to join the tagged list, you can tell me.
I will always be grateful for those who reblog. Thank you so much.
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nouearth · 9 months
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a letter to spider-man.
peter parker x male reader.
summary: spider-man launched his own help line and you need his advice in talking to your crush: peter.
wc: 1.2k. genre: fluff, comfort!fic. warnings: holland!peter, social anxiety, mention of death, crushes, college!au. notes: i was re-reading perks of being a wallflower again, OOF. i kinda want to make this a series, so please tell me if you'd like to see it become one!
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peter wasn’t sure what made him decide to do this: a spider-man help line. one day, he woke up and wanted to fulfill a sense of purpose more than he already has—to help out the public more, to build a community that peter has been wanting to fix since the death of his aunt.
so far, they’ve been pretty simple tasks: walking the dogs, helping a blind woman with grocery shopping, fixing a broken pipe with his webs—it was all out of the kindness of his own big heart. a heart that his aunt once nurtured.
it was hard at first. from being a ‘save the world’ hero to a ‘save the dog from burning up in a locked car’ hero, it was a downgrade one might find—peter did at first. 
but it’s been a while since he saw the relieved smiles on the public’s faces whenever he swung from the corner. true happiness that he was envious of at times, but nonetheless grateful for, and so that would become his motivation. 
maybe it can make the world a better place if people happen to be inspired by his actions. small stuff that regular civilians can achieve. a domino effect that peter hoped for.
—april 10th
dear spider-man, so, this is a thing now, huh? the future is so unpredictable, so i actually never thought i’d be writing to you. well, i guess the future would be me texting you like you advertised, but i like writing. it makes my hand cramp, and my handwriting is terrible (sorry, i hope you can still read this), but it feels good. like... shouting at the sky, i would imagine, so i prefer it. i’ve also been watching a lot of ‘80s and ‘90s movies, which could also be a major factor.  and i just realized i’m supposed to tell you about my problems! this is kinda hilarious because i think i’ve probably rewritten my letter six times already.  also, are you living your citizen life as a therapist or something? because why else would you be helping people this way? not that we don’t appreciate it, but it’s different. you’ve probably stopped reading by now, but in case you haven’t, i’ll keep the rest short. i guess my problem is… i like this guy. i know you’re not a relationship therapist (your secret is safe with me if you are though), but i figured a guy like you knew how to talk to people? you save people on a daily basis, so you probably aren’t scared anymore, right? that theory worked better in my head, to be honest, so scratch that! anyway, his name is peter. we’re both freshmen in college, so we’ve been seeing each other a lot, especially since we’re in the same classes. did i mention that i’m a guy as well? i don’t know him that well. i’m pretty quiet, i guess. invisible, maybe? it’s funny. sometimes, my professors would forget that i was even in their classes until i would speak up. but besides that point, he probably doesn’t even know that i exist either.  the perks of being invisible—i’m not even sure if there are any, because i’m noticeable enough on days where people want to say stuff. mean, terrible stuff. i wonder if he notices me, though. probably not, but a guy could only hope. i think we’d get along. again, hope! he’s smart and humble, always insecure of his own answers even though he knows—everyone knows—that it’s correct. kind, too. also awkward, like me. but the cute-awkward, not the me-awkward. i like him. i want to be friends with him. maybe even more? but i’m not greedy! i can settle with being friends.  i guess, how can i approach him?
thank you, (m/n)
it caught peter off guard at first—seeing his name in the same vicinity as spider-man became a jump-scare. even though, the sender kept everything pretty vague to keep the named crush relatively anonymous, there was a gut feeling telling peter that it was him—the culprit of (m/n)’s stolen heart.
nah, there are so many peters..! just a coincidence.
it took him longer than he thought to come up with a sufficient reply. usually, a task would’ve been done because all he had to do was use his body, his webs to do good—not his words. inexperienced yet excited, peter smiled while writing his letter.
peter wasn’t great at consoling people. hell, he couldn’t even make himself feel better. but he’ll try, like he always does. 
—april 23rd
hi (m/n)! sorry for taking so long to get back to you! life’s been crazy with everything going on. did you know that there’s been at least ten deli robberies that i managed to save this week alone? something about that chicken salad sandwich drives people nuts… like you, peter’s actually been pretty swamped with exams and graduation. i also want to congratulate you for being the only one that has written a letter to me instead of using the chat service! i’ve never written a letter before, so excuse my rustiness. my handwriting is way worse than yours. mine looks like if you gave a dog a pen and made it write. freshman year of college is a big year for you, for everyone. i remember the feeling of feeling so lost!  still know the feeling.  don’t get me wrong. yes, i’ve become braver since i started this spider-man stuff. but i still get scared, you know? life is so unpredictable and you never know when something might go wrong, and unexpectedly go so right.  like, just the other day, i got anxious when i was ordering from a drive-thru! they didn’t hear me, so i had to repeat my order. then again, because the mic sucked or whatever! even though it was only me, i felt so embarrassed, like my cheeks swelling and itchy skin type of nervous. but then it quickly went away because… okay, well i got my burger and fries pretty quick, so that helped. but you know what i mean? there’s this potentially negative outcome that we’re so afraid of. when in reality, it’s only ever so fleeting. you said he’s a nice guy, right? he could also be scared to talk to you, and you would never know because you’re too busy knocking yourself down! everyone is awkward. I’m awkward. so are some of my family members, my friends too. and that feeling won’t ever go away. sometimes, it’s meant to be shared. being invisible isn’t so bad sometimes. i definitely know the feeling, even wished for it at times. you can listen to music without being bothered, that’s a bonus! but from what i’ve noticed from feeling invisible, it would always come when i was being unkind to myself. i had the worst perception of myself in the eyes of my peers, and that made me withdraw. i purposely isolated myself because i was being unkind. the way you view yourself reflects onto others. not all the time, sometimes people are genuinely just assholes. but from what you’ve been telling me about this peter guy, he seems pretty special. if you’re awkward, be awkward and laugh it off. there’s nothing more charming than being genuine, and being kind to yourself is part of that progress. I’m rooting for you (and peter)!
from your friendly neighbor, spidey.
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nouearth. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works. andif you like this story, please reblog and leave a like!
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sinclairstarz · 1 month
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for the cinephile byler truthers. i made the party’s modern au letterboxd accounts
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in my head mike wheeler is the film bro cinephile of the party. hes a big brad pitt fan and fincher is his favorite director if you even care.. dirty dancing would be in his top 4 if he was honest. he went to see dune cause hes a scifi nerd, ended up hating it so much and complained about it to will but still gave it 2 stars cause it was pretty. did leave a very mean review. very critical rater but mostly leaves high ratings because he just doesn’t watch things he doesnt wanna see.
alternative movies i considered putting: pulp fiction (5 stars), the killer (1 star), se7en (5 stars), across the spiderverse (5 stars), nope (5 stars) , the batman 2022 (4 stars), once upon a time in hollywood (5 stars), inglorious basterds (5 stars), the matrix (half a star)
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the thing is so good and he has a poster of it on his wall in canon so it felt right. it just feels wrong not to do ghostbusters (plus its one of my favorite movies…) and yall need to hear me out on brokeback 😭😭😭 ur telling me he wouldnt bawl his eyes out??? ur wrong. will byers is a jake gyllenhaal lover. he watches dirty dancing a lot for mike, and loves ghibli movies a lot. he cried during rain man. honest rater but doesnt take it too seriously, mostly 4/5 star ratings
alternatives: saltburn (half a star), asteroid city (5 stars), blackkklansman (5 stars), the force awakens (3.5 stars), the perks of being a wallflower (4.5 stars), back to the future (5 stars)
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rogue one because lucas has taste. its the best star wars movie, if u care. he would love how fun and goofy ghostbusters 2 is. in my head Wes Anderson is like the party’s claimed director and they all watch his movies together and do marathons because the weirdness, comedy, and emotional commentary is a perfect mix for them. so. bottle rocket. lucas’ favorite wes anderson is the grand budapest hotel if u wanted to know. he rates things pretty highly and isn’t super critical.
alternatives: dodgeball (5 stars), scream 5 (4 stars), the matrix (3 stars), good will hunting (5 stars), jurassic park (5 stars), die hard (5 stars),
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likes making lucas watch gone girl on valentines day and telling him shes gonna do that to him next time he annoys her. v for vendetta is her favorite romance movie and shes a big marvel fan (in a cool way. kind of .) but thor ragnarok is probably one of her fav marvels, along with spiderman far from home and iron man. i just know she watches Casino Royale and decided she hated James Bond and then ended up watching all the Daniel Craig Bonds with Mike and loved Skyfall so much. the song is on her playlist and she did cry after No Time To Die.
Alternatives: Superbad (5 stars), baby driver (5 stars), bottoms (5 stars), 10 things i hate about you (3.5 stars), scream (5 stars), kill bill (5 stars), lord of the rings: the return of the king (1.5 stars)
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also a bit of a film nerd. i considered giving him a star wars and i know in my heart he’d probably have empire somewhere in his top 4. but star wars is lame and i wanted to give him se7en so he fucking gets se7en. he knows john wick is objectively dumb but he doesnt care hes just here for a good time. the party probably watched saltburn together and all fucking hated it. I just know hes a kurosawa nerd and always goes when the local theatres do very rare special showings of his movies.
alternatives: baby driver (4 stars), the ewok adventure (5 stars) hot fuzz (5 stars) harry potter and the sorcerers stone (4 stars) legally blonde (5 stars) spirited away (5 stars) dazed and confused (5 stars)
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she likes movies that make her feel all warm and fuzzy and hopeful. i wanted to give her breakfast club, but i think she’d honestly like sixteen candles more (even though breakfast club’s better). she cried at almost every movie in her top 4 and makes max rewatch juno with her like once a month. she gives most movies 5 stars unless she really hates them, and loves any movie thats fun to watch, even if its bad. she likes movies with pretty girls and fun colors.
alternatives: barbie (5 stars), legally blonde (5 stars), inception (2 stars), heathers (5 stars) pretty in pink (4.5 stars (she was mad andi didn’t end up with ducky)) my neighbor totoro (5 stars)
in conclusion if you haven’t seen They Cloned Tyron (2023) go watch it it deserved the oscar
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lunar-years · 4 months
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i wonder what jamie’s favourite movie is, like we know he’s seen the fault in our stars, and he doesn’t seem to like ratatouille very much. or maybe he just disapproves of sam mentioning ratatouille on a dating app idk. but then he also mentions the “three kates” (beckinsale, hudson, winslet) in the rom-communism scene, so maybe a preference for romcoms?
this is SUCH a fun question!! And I was going to say I don't have a good feel for the answer, but I thought about it over breakfast and came up with a whole thing, as one does (😂).
So, I think Jamie is generally one of those people who will watch just about anything and probably find most of them entertaining if not "good." And he is going to have very strong passionate opinions one way or another that he will voice to you during the movie (Since we know he was shouting things about the play down at the actors when Keeley took him to the theatre, I definitely think he's a talker during films lmao. And because of his total disdain for Ratatouille, I know he's very opinionated. But I also think if someone was like 'hey let's watch Ratatouille' Jamie would readily agree to it even though he hates the film, because he enjoys the opportunity to tell them during the movie exactly why he hates it.)
Jamie is my age and Fault in the Stars indicates to me that he was into all the popular YA movies of the 2010s, so I think he definitely likes like, Hunger Games, Perks of Being a Wallflower, Divergent, Marvel... all the classics hehe. The romcoms I think come from Georgie! When Georgie finally managed to get a night off work to spend with Jamie they would do film nights and curl up together by the TV. Jamie always let her pick the movie because it was a small way to make her happy, and she introduced him to all the classic romcoms :)
With Keeley I think he would happily watch reality tv with her just as readily as he'd watch whatever weird arthouse indie Film™️ she suggested to expand their cultural palate or whatever. He doesn't understand a single thing that's happening in those ones (especially if its a foreign film subtitles situation, because he can't read the screen fast enough) but it's okay because Keeley always patiently explains it to him afterward and doesn't ever make fun of him when he misses the point :)
Also, I wrote in Waterfalls that he loves the Fast and Furious franchise and I stand by that. I think a lot of like, objectively stupid and nonsensical movies are his favorites 😂 Brett apparently thinks Phil has terrible taste in movies, and I like to think Roy thinks the same about Jamie, except that it's very surface level because no matter how much Roy complains, he always ends up getting drawn in my how stupid the plots are kdngjka. And when Roy refuses to watch something Jamie and/or Keeley want to watch, Jamie gets to throw back at him, "don't act like you're better than us, Roy, I know you watched all of Lust Conquers All" and that shuts him right up 😁
Jamie never actually cares what they watch when he's with Roy and Keeley, but he nevertheless puts up a fuss about how it's his turn to pick and dramatically dive-grabs for the remote just to mess with roy hahahah.
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pepperonijem · 1 year
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iii. so this is my life || all my love
“So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.” -- Perks of Being a Wallflower; Stephen Chbosky
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Summary: oh no it’s the “i got injured and now he has to reluctantly take care of me” trope! Pairing: high school!bucky x f!reader Warnings: harry potter mentions !! cursing Word Count: 4.5k A/N: drum major natasha is something so personal to me, so intimate
previous chapter || back to library || next chapter
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“No shit,” Wanda said in disbelief as she took a sip of her milkshake. “You like actually live in the same house? Like, one-wall-apart-same-bathroom-same-dinner-at-the-same-table live together?” She reached over to grab a french fry from Steve’s plate, who slapped her hand away.
You nodded simply as you offered your plate of fries to Wanda instead. “Yeah,” you confirmed. “Crazy right?”
Wanda nodded with a scoff as she looked at Steve who was still processing your confession with wide eyes. “So wait, isn’t that incredibly awkward? Since you confessed your love for him last week?”
“Ugh,” you groaned. “Don’t remind me. I literally think about that every time I see his face… which is now often. And it’s so weird because I think his dad wants us together?”
“His dad?!” Steve finally reacted, nearly choking on his shake and his eyes widened in surprise while Wanda cringed. “No way? Is he the one who took that picture of you guys? The one Bucky asked for today?”
 “Yeah, it was all him. He even asked me about it the first night I moved in.” You recalled the moment as you recounted it to your friends. 
When you had first entered their home, there was a banner in the foyer that read “WELCOME HOME” with Bucky and his dad standing beneath it. His dad excitedly walked over to give you and your dad a friendly hug all while Bucky watched on with a bored expression. “You can call me uncle,” he had suggested with an excited grin on his face. “Oh, it’s going to be nothing but fun times from here on out! Let me show you around.”
Bucky and his dad had completely redecorated the spare bedroom they had, not only cleaning it but making it cozy with string lights along one wall and stocking the bed with way too many pillows for just one person. There was a desk in the corner, and a small reading nook with shelves built in, with already a few books that they had around the house. It looked like it had been taken from a teenage girl’s pinterest board. Even though his son couldn’t care less about you, Mr. Barnes definitely went the extra mile to make you feel as comfortable as possible living away from your father.
After the tour, they led you downstairs where there was an elaborate dinner laid out on the table and the four of you feasted, and three of you had a lively conversation, while Bucky listened and nodded every now and then. After your dad had left and some teary goodbyes, you offered to help Bucky’s dad with the dishes, insisting that it was the least you could do after he offered to take you in on such short notice, and honestly, you were still shocked at how welcoming he was to you.
So there you were in the kitchen with your crush’s dad, still unable to fathom that you were living with him, when he snapped you out of your thoughts with a simple question. “So you and Bucky?” You turned to look at him in surprise only to catch a mischievous grin on his face as he passed you a plate to dry off.
“M-me and Bucky?” You stuttered, still taken aback by the teasing tone in her voice. “What about me and Bucky?”
He turned back to the dish at hand, but the smug grin was still on his face. “Bucky told me the two of you are in the same literature class,” he began, the direction of his words innocent, but the playful tone suggested otherwise. “Do you like him?” He asked bluntly, almost causing you to drop the glass that was in your hands.
“Sorry?” you choked out as he chuckled in response. 
“I think you and Bucky would be a good fit,” he continued on. “And I’ve always wanted a daughter.” He let out a sigh, lost in his own thoughts as he scrubbed away at the plates in the sink. That conversation was only the start of the many, many hints he dropped throughout the week that he deemed you a good match for his son. Another one being the polaroid he had slipped into your backpack the night before your exam, a good luck charm, he called it.
When you finished telling your story, Wanda let out an incredulous laugh. “That’s so weird,” she mused. “Bucky’s such a cold and icy jerk, but his dad sounds so nice. Are you sure he’s not adopted or something?”
“No, he’s definitely not,” Steve confirmed. “I’ve seen his birth certificate.” He nodded as he dipped another french fry in his mixture of mayonnaise and ketchup. You and Wanda shared a confused look, asking him to elaborate. “He and I used to be best friends, remember? Before I got stuck with you goofs.”
Wanda nodded now remembering, while you protested. “Wait what? I didn’t know this?” You complained. “Why don’t I know this?” Wanda’s eyebrows furrowed as she recalled their childhood. Before her eyes lit up in recognition.
“Oh,” she snapped her fingers. “We all went to the same elementary school for a while, but Bucky’s dad moved him to a private school, and we didn’t see him again until freshman year.” Steve hummed in confirmation as Wanda explained.
“Wait, but I went to school with you guys too, I would have known him, wouldn’t I?” you asked.
“No,” Wanda corrected. “You transferred in about a month after he left. Don’t you remember? That’s how the Tasty Trio began. Steve would not stop sulking during recess for an entire month, until you came and told him that you heard a song on the radio saying big girls don’t cry and he actually stopped crying. Steve never brought him up again.”
You smiled fondly at Steve whose ears turned pink at the memory. You took an unopened straw, ripped off the top half of the wrapper and blew the other half at him, hitting him right at the top of his messy dark hair. He finally looked up and although a pout was on his face, you could see the amusement in his eyes. 
Wanda’s eyebrows furrowed once again. “Wait but that doesn’t explain how you’ve seen his birth certificate?” She asked Steve who was still pouting at you as you laughed.
“Oh,” Steve began. “We were pretending to be pirates one day and I told him that he couldn’t be a pirate if he was born a prince, since I really thought his house was like a tiny castle, and he dug through his dad’s office to show me proof he wasn’t a prince.” Honestly, the thought of a little Steve and a little Bucky being best friends was something you couldn’t even imagine. Steve was warm and kind, whereas Bucky was just… not. Even in the last week you’ve spent at his house, Bucky was reserved, very much unlike his father, and mostly preferred to observe what was happening than be part of it. Despite all the attention he gets from your classmates, he actually seemed kind of shy, you thought.
As the three of you laughed at more of Steve’s stories about his childhood with Bucky, you checked your phone to see that it was nearing 6 p.m. “Oh shoot,” you exclaimed. “We’re gonna be late for the game.”
The sound of cheers and brass instruments filled your ears as the three of you found seats on the bleachers. Today was the last game of the season and your school’s team was up against one of the best teams in the area, so the stadium was much more crowded than usual. You were among the sea of red and white t-shirts, facing an equally full sea of blue and yellow, and the crowds were roaring. 
Normally, you would want to skip this kind of crowded event – the dread of trying to find parking outweighed any school spirit you had. But Wanda, who was part of the yearbook committee, promised to buy you and Steve ice cream afterwards if you two would come with her and help take pictures at the end of the game. So she handed the two of you cameras, and the three of you took a bus to the stadium to avoid the parking frenzy. Anything for Wanda (but seeing Bucky play football was also a pretty good bonus).
You got to the game before the end of the second quarter, giving Wanda enough time to take a few pictures of the marching band and drill team during their routines and leaving you and Steve to sit at the bleachers in her absence. While both teams were still on break, you noticed Steve looking down at the field with a nostalgic smile and wistfulness in his eyes. “Do you ever miss playing, Steve?” you asked.
He let out a sigh before answering. “I mean yeah, kind of,” he began. “I miss playing and the guys mostly, but do I miss the amount of time it took out of my life? Absolutely not.” For the last three years, Steve was one of the stars of the school’s varsity football team, co-captains with Tony. So it was a huge surprise to everyone when he announced his absence this year in favor of taking honors English literature as well as culinary basics. He didn’t talk about football much, but clearly, he did miss it.
“Well,” you said. “Me and Wanda are glad to have you on the bleachers with us.” You leaned over and rested your head on his shoulder as he leaned his own head down on top of yours. You pointed out over at the bench where the football players were as Wanda shared a laugh with Clint and Rhodey, the student medics for the football team. “She’s supposed to be taking pictures, right?” you let out a chuckle as you pulled your phone out to text her. You watched as she looked down at her phone with a chuckle, showing the message to her friends who laughed along, and the next thing you knew, she had the lens pointed up at you and Steve. She held out her hand in front of the lens to make a small heart as you and Steve reached your arms over your heads to make your own heart. You made a mental note to ask her for the picture later.
For the rest of the game, the mood on your side of the bleachers was quite festive in celebration of the big lead your team had. Bucky, Tony, and Peter were leading the offense. Everyone was chanting Peter’s name, the freshman quarterback who was supposed to be going pro after high school, but you could not keep your eyes off Bucky the entire time. The band was playing every hit they had, the cheer squad led the fans through every chant they knew and the energy was high, everyone knowing the win was secured. So by the time Wanda had come up and given you two your roles – you were to take pictures and videos of the post-game team huddle and Steve was sent to take pictures of the final touchdowns – you and Steve had lost your voices, but nodded enthusiastically. 
To get the best angle of the team’s huddle, you made your way down to the drum major’s podium where head drum major Natasha was standing, giving instructions to the band in front of her who was beginning to pack up. “Hi Natasha,” you greeted her once she finished. She gave a friendly wave in response. “Do you mind if I get up there so I can get a better shot?” 
She smiled and nodded as she bent down to help you up the ladder. “Sure thing,” she agreed. “Just make sure you tell Wanda to put in some good shots of me in the yearbook. I want a whole page this year.” She chuckled as you promised to relay her request, and she climbed down the stairs, reminding you to be careful as the stand was kind of wobbly.
You looked towards the football team who were all huddled right in front of the podium around Tony, who was leading the team in a very sentimental talk about how glad he was to have been the captain of such a strong team. Tony (and Steve) had led the team to become the top football team in the region for the last two years, and to say the guys on the team were grateful was an understatement. They all cheered and wrapped him in a tight embrace as they cheered for him, and when he gave Bucky a shoutout for playing extra well this season, you couldn’t help but snap a picture of the shy smile that appeared on his face. Tony ended the talk with a loud team chant as the boys erupted in applause, and laughed as Peter then immediately grabbed the nearest cooler and dumped its contents on Tony.
You cringed a little at the splash of lemon-lime Gatorade that had made its way to your shirt, but let out a laugh as you watched a Gatorade-soaked Tony chase around his teammates for hugs. This was going to be great footage for Wanda, and you were excited to share it with her. 
However, as you were making your way down the podium, you felt the unmistakable slickness of Gatorade on the rung and let out a quiet “Oh shit,” as you fell past the rest of the ladder and onto a puddle of the same beverage on the ground, landing in a position that was definitely not good for your ankle or the jeans you were wearing.
Tony and one of his friends who had stayed to watch Tony’s final football huddle, Sam, who you also recognized as Bucky’s friend, were the first to come check on you. “Shit,” Tony exclaimed. “Are you okay?” He reached down to try to help you up but stopped when he noticed your swollen ankle. He turned to Sam, asking him to go get Rhodey. Sam nodded in response and ran, immediately shouting his name. At this point, Steve and Wanda who were already beginning their walk back to you heard the commotion and began running, calling your name.
By the time Rhodey, Wanda, and Steve got to you, the whole football team was looking at you in concern. Tony was standing towards the back of the group scolding a remorseful looking Peter, who dumped the cooler, about why it’s dangerous to be dumping Gatorade on people while Bucky watched the two with amusement. Rhodey knelt down beside you, removing your shoe and sock and tenderly touching the injured part of your ankle, checking for any bone fragments.
“Well it’s definitely swollen,” he diagnosed. “Did you happen to hear a crunch or anything when you fell?” He gently moved your foot around, noting how you winced at the action. You shook your head no as he continued. “Okay, that’s good. It seems like it’s just a sprain then.” Peter looked more relieved than you did, wincing when Tony swatted him on the back. Rhodey and Tony helped you to stand and move to the bench. Sam handed you an ice pack as Rhodey wrapped your foot in a bandage and gave you instructions. “Make sure not to put any weight on your foot, and ice it as much as you can. When you get home, try to keep your foot elevated. How are you getting home though?”
You heard Steve silently curse himself for not taking his car today. “We took the bus today,” you answered Rhodey. “I was just going to take the bus back home with Wanda and Steve.” 
Rhodey hummed in response. “Can you call anyone to come pick you up instead?” 
Wanda snapped her fingers, an idea coming to mind. She turned to Bucky with a mischievous smile and asked, “Don’t you guys live together? Why don’t you take her home?” You could see both Steve and Bucky cringe at the question, while the other boys looked on in confusion.
“You live together?” Rhodey asked with a smirk as he looked at Wanda who nodded in confirmation. “That’s perfect then. Bucky, take her home. Doctor’s orders.” The other boys murmured in agreement, still shocked at the revelation. 
Your face went red as you looked over to Bucky, trying to read his face. Realizing he was outnumbered, he let out a sigh as he reluctantly agreed. The boys collectively sighed in relief, and you realized how surprised you were at how concerned about you they actually were. They all patted Bucky on the back as they started to finally disperse, promising to save him some pancakes as they made their way to the parking lot. Steve and Wanda both bid you good night, Wanda giving you a sly wink as she led a pouty Steve to the bus stop, leaving you and Bucky alone on the field. 
He grabbed your camera and the rest of your belongings, slinging it over his shoulder, as he offered his hand out to you. You felt your cheeks turn pink as you put your hand in his calloused one. He helped you to stand and immediately wrapped his arm around your waist and you felt your heart race at the contact. “I can’t believe I’m missing my last IHOP night for this,” he grumbled, starting to walk.
In spite of your nervousness, you couldn’t help but let out a snort at his comment, at which Bucky glared at you. “IHOP?” you repeated. “Is the football team secretly full of theatre kids?” Bucky rolled his eyes as you teased him. “Do you guys sing songs obnoxiously loudly in front of the other customers too? In that case I can hop my way home.” Bucky’s refusal to dignify your question or your pun was betrayed by the shade of red that his cheeks turned as you let out a laugh that quickly turned into a hiss of pain as you struggled to keep up with Bucky’s pace. He stopped and turned to you, his hand slipping from your waist, but reaching up to your arm to keep you stable.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, the sudden gentleness and concern in his voice catching you by surprise. For the first time tonight, you got to see him up close – the tiredness in his eyes, and the sheen of sweat still on his forehead, and his dark, disheveled hair – illuminated by the stadium lights. He must have been tired this week after staying up to tutor you every night. You couldn’t help but feel a twang of guilt in your chest.
You stammered as you replied, the nervousness creeping back up. “I- you’re walking too fast. I can’t keep up.” Once again, you were surprised to feel Bucky’s grip on your arm relax just a little as he let out a chuckle despite himself.
“Scott says the same thing to me sometimes,” he replied, shaking his head. He let go of your arm, securing your camera strap around his neck and putting your own belongings into his duffle bag as he turned his back to you and crouched down. You froze, standing on one foot, unsure of what was happening. He let out a sigh. “Well? Get on. We won’t make it to my car until tomorrow if we have to walk at your pace.” You hopped your way over, and once Bucky was sure your arms were securely around his neck and his arms under your legs, he set off and you prayed that he couldn’t feel just how fast your heart was beating behind him.
Honestly, this was not how you thought your night was going to go. Although you had been in Bucky’s car every morning since you moved in, the silence between the two of you this time was different. Comfortable, even, and you hoped he couldn’t hear how quickly your heart was beating. Both hands on the wheel, Bucky was focused on the now empty roads in front of him as he carefully drove home. You looked at him, so mesmerized by his features illuminated every so often by the warm glow of the streetlights, that you almost missed the start of your favorite song. 
“So you don’t normally drive in silence?” you asked him teasingly. 
“I do, actually,” he replied and you let out a quiet “oh,” before he continued. “I like silence when I’m on my way to school, it helps me think through my plans for the day. But when I’m driving at night…” he cleared his throat as if embarrassed to admit something to you.
“What about it?” You asked curiously. If the lights had brightened the car just right, you would have been able to see the blush on Bucky’s cheeks before he finally finished his thought.
“Well,” he began quietly. “It makes me feel like I’m in a movie. Especially when I drive through that tunnel.” You couldn’t help but smile as you reached up to press the button to open the moonroof in his car, drowning out his protests as you also turned the music up all the way as you entered the warmly lit tunnel.
Bucky looked at you incredulously, but couldn’t help himself from smiling as you opened the window to reach your hand out. It definitely was just like a movie and for the first time since you came into his life, he was glad to surrender his routines to you. 
He didn’t bother to close the windows even after leaving the tunnel, choosing instead to continue driving with the music all the way up. You were surprised to hear quite a few of your own liked songs come on the speakers, but not as surprised as Bucky was to see how much music taste you had in common.
The rest of the drive was filled with the same wistful feeling as a coming-of-age movie, and before you realized it, he was parked in the driveway of his home. He turned off the engine and before you could attempt to wobble your way out of the car, he had opened your door and grabbed your things, assisting you once again with a soft “Let’s go.” 
You wondered if this was what it would be like to come home after a date. You blushed at the thought, Bucky’s arm firmly but gently wrapped around your waist, walking you up the front steps. It was easy to imagine it, the idea of going out to a diner and talking and laughing for hours then driving together, taking all of the side streets and hitting all of the red lights just to hold onto each other’s presence just a little more. But the throbbing in your right ankle snapped you out of your imagination just in time for Bucky to get the door open. 
“We’re home,” Bucky called to the dark house. “Huh,” he thought aloud. “I guess no one’s here.” He walked over to the kitchen counter to find a sticky note and a few dollar bills beside it. Bucky read the note aloud to you. “Hey kids! I went out with some friends. Congrats on the win! Buy yourselves some pizza and I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” Bucky rolled his eyes as he grabbed the dollar bills and started typing on his phone.
“Does he go out like that often?” you asked. Bucky nodded as he continued to search through his phone. 
“Yeah, it’s normal,” he confirmed. “Is pepperoni pizza okay with you?” When you nodded he asked what drink you wanted as he finished typing in your orders before walking towards the cabinet to grab a pain killer and a glass of water, handing both to you. “I’ve sprained my ankles countless times. This helps, trust me. But it might make you a little bit sleepy.” Once you finished your water, he helped walk you upstairs to your room, promising to come back and get you once the pizza arrived.
Now in the comfort and privacy of your own room, you reach over to your nightstand drawer and pull out the letter you had written to Bucky. It had only been a few weeks, but it felt like so much longer. Rereading the words you had written, you felt yourself cringing in response, and you realize just how much has changed in that time. Replacing the letter back in its envelope, you close your eyes and let out a dreamy sigh, letting yourself come back to the fantasy of you and Bucky coming home together from a date, not knowing how long it was before you fell into a slumber, still dreaming about Bucky, who in your dream was confessing to you.
When your eyes fluttered open once again, you were surprised to see a pajama-clad Bucky leaning against the doorway running a towel through his freshly washed hair. “You’re finally up,” he stated. “You hungry?” and as if on cue, your stomach let out a rumble as you sat up.
Downstairs, Bucky helped to heat up your pizza as you sat at the island watching him quietly. The TV was playing what sounded like a Harry Potter movie in the living room, but other than that and the soft hum of the microwave, it was quiet. Once again, you realized just how absurd it was that just last week Bucky turned you down, and now you were sitting in his kitchen as he prepared your dinner. Bucky’s words snapped you out of your thoughts. “You can stay in the living room if you want.” You looked up at him as he continued. “So I don’t have to keep missing my movie to see if you’ve somehow fallen and died.” You couldn’t help but let out a quiet chuckle, surprised to see Bucky’s lip quirk up in semblance of a smile as well. After helping you to the living room, he helped prop your feet up on a few pillows and took a seat on the opposite side of the same couch. 
The movie continued for a while as the two of you sat in silence before you spoke. “So are you a Harry Potter fan then?” you asked. Bucky nodded in response, not bothering to look away from the screen. “Do you like the books better or the movies?” Now he looked at you with an eyebrow raised.
“The movies, actually,” he replied without hesitation. This sparked a debate that got much more heated than you anticipated and before you realized it, you and Bucky were yelling back and forth, the whole scene looking much sillier than either of you realized. You were yelling at him, still unable to really sit up, and Bucky was leaning forward to keep eye contact with you from around your foot which currently was propped up in between the two of you and careful to not move the stack of pillows.
You let out a huff. “You know what, James Barnes? You must really hate me if you think I could ever associate with anyone who thinks it was a better creative choice for Dumbledore to yell at Harry.” Bucky let out a petty laugh as you tried and failed to turn away from him.
“Sure,” he replied with a cocky grin that you wanted to smack off his beautiful face. “Well, haven’t you heard? The person you hate the most could end up becoming the one you end up loving the most.” 
You were 100% sure he was just kidding, but damn, you thought. What if?
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happilychaengs · 1 year
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jennie - the girl that didn't pass you by
a/n: i wrote this in like a day and i'm happy with how this turned out though i'm still feeling nervous of publishing this. i have two other fics that were supposed to be christmasy office stuff and they're pretty fleshed out but i'm not so proud of them
jennie kim x gender neutral reader
word count: 1,386
all fluff
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The sweet and inviting aroma of roasted coffee beans filled the air as you walked in, the brisk wind whirling around as the door closes behind you. You adored this café. This was basically like your second home.
You took a look around, glazing over everything the café had to offer. Christmas classics played quietly from every corner of the building, now instilling it with that child-like wonder you felt was missing. There was some neatly handwritten chalk on the walls of the specials today. A handful of people were present, scattered around the café, all of them kind of just doing their own thing.
And finally, there was that one barista, whom you knew as Jennie according to her nametag, working the register today. You'd always only come here during her shifts. She had a gummy smile, a beauty mark under her left eyebrow which you're sure no one has noticed before, and from what you could tell from your short encounters with her, a great personality to match.
"The usual?" She knows your order by heart. Even if she doesn't know you per se but she knows of you. You nod, as you lug your bag to your usual corner. Sitting down and waiting patiently for your order, you glanced out the window as you looked over all the people passing by, going through the motions of life.
It always seemed too fast for your liking. You always thought if you got caught up with the tide, you'd never be able to stop and inevitably reach the end with a hard crash, so you've decided for yourself to avoid all of that. Tearing your eyes away, you took out one of the books from your bag that you've loved rereading to this day. The Perks of Being a Wallflower. You smiled to yourself as you saw you were nearing the end of the book again, your bookmark stuck between one of the last few pages.
But before you could start turning those pages again, you heard someone clearing their throat and noticed a cup of coffee being placed in front of you in your peripheral vision. When you looked up, it was her. Jennie.
"May I sit?" she asked, with a small smile.
"Of course," you said as you set your book down, returning her smile.
You couldn't help but want to leave the cup there after picking it up and inspecting the foam art. It was too lovely to ruin. It was a simple heart, but you could tell how much work went into it. You set it down once more.
"Not your thing?" She asked with a cute pout apparent on her face.
You shook your head, "No... it's just that I didn't want to ruin the art."
She let out a small laugh as she leaned closer to the table, her eyes wandering around your table. "Well, that's awfully nice of you but you should drink it before it gets cold Y/N."
Your eyebrows arched in confusion, a slight frown appearing on your lips, "How do you know my name?"
She laughed again as she moved her hands all around her body, signaling the outfit, "Did you forget it's a café? If I didn't know your name, that'd be a bigger problem."
Your cheeks turned a soft shade of pink as you felt embarrassed at your sudden lack of common sense, "Right... Anyways... what are you doing here?"
"I'm on break right now and thought I'd say hi to my favorite customer." A sly grin makes its way across her face, all the while you're blushing even harder, eyes downcast. "You're interesting Y/N. I just wanted to get to know you, that's all."
Her eyes make their way to the book you've set down to your left. They widen in surprise. "That's a great book."
You're surprised. Most would say that they've only seen the movie. "You read it?"
She nods plain and simple, "That's my favorite so far." And almost instantaneously, she glances up at you again, the look of curiosity and wonder playfully dancing on your lips. You look like you want to ask her more and she's happy to answer.
Then finally, you have the courage to do so. It goes on for what seems like hours, even if it's mere minutes, while you're getting lost in her words and intricate explanations. Your infatuation with her almost seems to grow into something more in this moment. Your entire sense of being has shifted into something more, and she could clearly see it.
She smiled at your demeanor while rocking her chair back and forth, "Say Y/N... do you want to hang out after I'm off my shift?"
And to say you were surprised was quite an understatement. You mean, you didn't expect her to ask you anything, let alone talk to you. All you did was admire her from a distance. Nothing more, nothing less and you thought she'd be one of those people you pass by in life. The people who make an impression on you and who just never seem to stay but she was just so different.
You just gave her a tight-lipped smile as you reach for your now cold cup much like her warning to finally take a sip, the taste of peppermint and Christmas goodness filling your senses and the sound of her giggling at your foam mustache. "Of course."
And those hours before the end of her shift just seemed to pass you by but you weren't against it for once. As she took hung her apron on the wall and walked out from behind the register, she gave you a small smile while putting on her overcoat. "Shall we?"
"Let's." And then she unexpectedly loops her arm around yours, her eyes wide with awe at the lights that had been hung up for the holidays. The white and red that seemed to gleam ever brighter with every step you took. The snowfall that seemed to make its way to you as small flakes descended upon the two of you, Jennie sticking her tongue out in amusement and catching a few. The few lights that were visible in the surrounding buildings so late at night, you could only imagine what was happening in there.
And although the two of you haven't decided where to go yet, you enjoyed this. The spontaneous and unplanned nature of it. She drags you anywhere and everywhere, somehow making it to the town square. A big evergreen tree planted in the center with all kinds of ornaments hung up, covered in snow. You sit on a bench nearby as you see her running around, enjoying the night sky and the snow that comes along with it but before you know it, you get hit hard by a blast of freezing cold on your face, your vision impaired by a soft, slushy-like substance that drips down.
You wipe it off and your eyes meet hers again. This time there's a mischievous glint in her eyes and a playful smile on her lips as there's another molded ball of ammunition in her now red, cold hands, ready to throw.
Now that you think about it, maybe it was this night that your life seemed to just get a little bit faster. A little bit more exciting as you got hit directly in the face by another wad of snow, hearing a cheer of victory from the other side. She was definitely not just passing you by. "You're done for Jennie!"
Time flies by again in your little snowball fight and the two of you are left flat on the ground next to each other, breaths rising into white puffs to the stars above. "That... that was the most fun I've had in a while." She admits with a chuckle. "We should do this again Y/N. Not just the snowball fight but you know... the whole shebang."
You let out a breathy laugh as you stared up at the night sky, filled with dazzling lights. It was almost like even the stars were all watching this moment between you two. A big grin stretches across your face as you reply, not knowing that life would move even faster with this girl by your side. "I'd love to."
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I think it's interesting to note that Kit stated that Catelyn was "horrific" towards him. I don't necessarily totally agree with him as a Catelyn fan.
But as an anti-d* person?? It's pretty good ammo. According to Kit, Catelyn's treatment of Jon was horrific and he thinks that affected the sort of women he was drawn to, "strong" women. If we're following the statement about his treatment being "horrific", it really pounds on the idea that Jon was drawn to women who well...treated him horrifically....
Not to sound all "Perks of being a Wallflower" about it, but we accept the love we think we deserve. As many metas have already stated, Jon shirks the image of the "lady" because he thinks he can't obtain that sort of woman, not because he doesnt want it. And we've seen through his daydreams that he does want it.
It's no secret that Jon's got mommy issues, and the past women he's chosen are the same as Catelyn in the ways that count: they're strong and they misreated him. Sansa is different from Catelyn in the ways that count: she accepts him as a Stark and was willing to give up what should've been her birth right for him.
I know these have been discussed before, but I just wanted to relate it to Kit's words because even though I don't agree with him 100%, he does ~generally~ get it.
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i miss you but you don’t even remember me
we never really spoke to each other. you don’t even know what i look like but i still miss you. i was the child that randomly walked into your life and then refused to leave because i needed you. i was young and i was in pain but you were there for me. i learnt everything about you but you didn’t ever want to know anything about me.
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on one day you told me you were just like an onion with ‘many layers to your personality’ and i thought that was the most fascinating analogy ever. and then i read about it in a book.
love, rosie // 2004
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another day you said you were watching ‘the breakfast club’. i asked you what that was and you said, ‘obviously, you wouldn’t know about it.’ i thought i’ll watch it some day. i still haven’t.
the breakfast club // 1985
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you told me your birthdate and i spent months trying to contact grant gustin through his manager just because you told me you loved watching ‘the flash’. i wanted to give you an incredible gift but ended up making an elaborate presentation. i still remember your birthday and i send you a message every year which i delete within a week because i’m embarrassed that i haven’t forgotten it when nothing of me remains in your memory. 
instagram 'happy birthday' text // 2022
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you told me you wrote poetry and played basketball and that reminded me of troy bolton from high school musical. you said you also knew ballroom dancing. i thought you were the coolest person i’d ever met.
high school musical 1 and 3 // 2006, 2008
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my favorite book is ‘the perks of being a wallflower’. i read this quote and started getting teary-eyed because it reminded me of you. you were to me what charlie’s anonymous friend was to him. i didn’t mean to trouble you but i guess i did.
the perks of being a wallflower // 1999
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we shared a common love for cats. your favorites were grey british shorthairs with blue eyes. i’d send pictures of them to you constantly.
pictures of cats // grey british shorthairs
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i am not surprised by how little i mean to you since i forced myself into your life. i’m sorry. i truly am sorry. and i’m sorry for constantly coming back into it. i’m sorry for saying i won’t do it again but still sending you long paragraphs pleading for forgiveness for being a nuisance.
sorry for writing all the songs about you // clara mae, 2018
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i know i left abruptly but that was because i was scared you’d leave first. i’ve been left before so i thought it would hurt less to be the one to do the leaving but i guess i was wrong. i still miss you. and i think about you whenever i'm sad because i met you when i was at my lowest.
summertime sadness // lana del rey, 2012
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- missing someone is painful. there’s always feelings of grief and sorrow that comes with reminiscing memories with them. but the most devastating feeling is when the person you miss doesn’t even remember you exist. when you’re nothing more than a faint memory of their past but to you, they were everything. you thought about them for the years that followed even though it hurt you every time they crossed your mind -
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yuujispinkhair · 3 months
Note
self-ship asks, yuuji and/or sukuna (individually or a poly ship, whatever strikes your fancy): 🪱(with example questions if you feel like it), 🐠 (with how the date would go), 🎞️(is there any, I'll watch this but only because it's with you?).
Aww thank you for the questions babe!! 💗
Who asks ridiculous questions (like “would you still love me if I was a worm?”)
Answered here
Aquarium dates or museum dates?
Sukuna x Winter x Yuuji: Yuuji wants to go to the aquarium, and Sukuna wants to go to the museum. So we agree to go to both. Yuuji knows a lot about the different fishes because his grandpa used to take him fishing and to the aquarium quite often. Sukuna and I both think our boyfriend is super adorable and hot at the same time when he explains all kinds of interesting fish facts.💗 At the museum, Sukuna is in his element. He is a bit of a nerd and knows far too much about each and every thing. Some random people start following us because they assume this is some kind of museum tour lol, but when Sukuna glares at them and tells them they are interrupting our date, they quickly leave.
You each pick three movies for a movie marathon. Who’s picking what?
Yuuji x Winter: The Human Earthworm movies are important to Yuuji, so I watch them with him even though I don't like horror at all. I make him promise to not leave my side for several days, until I am not scared anymore ;) We both have "The Silver Linings Playbook" in our top-list, so this is something we watch quite often. (And yes, Yuuji tells me that he likes my ass better than Jennifer Lawrence's ass, and it makes me laugh so much). I also pick "LOTR" and "The Perks of Being a Wallflower," and Yuuji enjoys them too. He already knew them, though. It's kind of hard to surprise a movie lover like him when it comes to movies. Yuuji is very open to every genre, so he is ok with watching anything I pick. Sukuna x Winter: Tbh I have no idea which movies Sukuna would pick aaaah I never thought about it. He loves crime shows though and we often watch them together. He grins the whole time and tells me how much better he would be at figuring out the cases + at committing crimes and getting away with it 😂 Sukuna watches "LOTR" with me even though he thinks he won't really like it. But then he gets very invested in the lore and the next day I catch him reading the first book. Sukuna enjoys documentaries too, and some of them sound boring to me, but of course, I watch with him, and sometimes, I end up really finding them interesting after all. Other times, I spend those long hours watching Sukuna's face as he gets fully immersed in his documentary, and I can't stop grinning because I love how he is sitting there and soaking up all the knowledge.
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The perks of being a wallflower - Chapter 1
Also posted on AO3!
I spent the entire day writing this. The second chapter will be posted shortly, I hope.
There might be some timeline inaccuracies but the MCU already sucks at that, so bear with me, lmao.
TRIGGER WARNINGS - mentions of bullying, death, suicidal thoughts and self-harm.
DO NOT SHIP PETER AND TONY. P/ROSHIP DNI.
--
To Iron Man,
My name is Peter Parker and you’re my favorite hero! Look, I drew you! Your armor is pretty hard to draw but I tried.
I like building stuff too! I wanna grow up to be just like you one day. I heard you built stuff when you were just five. That’s so cool!
Sincerely,
Peter, age 7
Parker
--
To Iron Man,
Hi! It’s Peter again. Parker. I dunno if you remember me. Did you get my first letter? You must be busy being the coolest hero in the world so I understand if you couldn’t answer.
Anyway I’m going to the Stark Expo! For a whole week! I’m gonna see you up close!! My Uncle Ben is the best. He’s a big fan too!
See you there!
Sincerely,
Peter Parker, age 9
--
To Iron Man,
I can’t believe I actually met you!! Twice!!! You said “nice work, kid”! Did you remember me??
Yeah too bad I’m grounded… I really scared Uncle Ben and Aunt May. But thanks to you I’m okay! This was the best week of my life! Do you think we’re gonna meet again? I dunno but it would be nice.
I hope you’re ok after all that. That Hammer guy is nobody! That’s what he gets for messing with you!
Anyway I have to go to bed, good night!
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Iron Man
Dear Mr. Stark,
Hi, Peter again! How are you? I got really worried… I never thought I’d see aliens like this. Then I saw on TV that you flew right into the wormhole and I got so scared that you would get stuck in it forever…
Do you ever get scared, Mr. Stark? Aunt May and Uncle Ben tell me they’re surprised that I don’t get scared often. But I was really scared something happened to you or to them. I don’t wanna lose anyone else…
We’re all okay though! But I still hope you’re safe now, Mr. Stark.
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
I saw what happened in Malibu and I got so scared! I’m really sorry you lost your home. I was so sad and afraid you were gone, but Uncle Ben told me you’re gonna find a way out of this. You always know what to do, Mr. Stark! You’re a genius! I know you’ll come back somehow and defeat the bad guys, like you always do! I’m rooting for you!
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
P.S.: I tried to draw you again but no armor this time! Because you’re a hero with or without the armor! I hope you know that. Even if I never send you this… or any other letters…
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
Happy birthday!
I actually had a science fair today… and I built my own miniature arc reactor! It’s not as good as yours of course. But I got a pretty good grade! Even if I didn’t win the fair, I was in third place!
There’s this kid Flash, though, I think he got jealous and he tried to break my arc reactor. I didn’t let him! He really doesn’t like me and I dunno why. I never did anything to him. But I guess nobody likes me at school except for Ned, who’s my best friend. We like building LEGOs together.
Okay, sorry for rambling, Mr. Stark. Hope you have a great birthday!
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
I had a bad day.
I mean I guess everyone has bad days. Maybe you have bad days too. But sometimes my bad days are really bad.
Flash is even worse, because he usually just insults me and I ignore him, but he has some friends that do the dirty work. Like today they shoved me in a locker and the hallway was completely empty. It was dark and very tight in there, it was kinda hard to breathe. I screamed for help but no one would hear. I didn’t have my phone so I couldn’t call anyone. Eventually the janitor found me and let me out.
I think I might be claustrophobic like the doctors say. I felt like I was gonna die in that locker…
I didn’t wanna tell Aunt May and Uncle Ben. They’re always busy and I know Uncle Ben is gonna get really angry. Like he doesn’t get angry at me but he doesn’t have to worry. I don’t want him to worry and get upset because of me.
… Sorry for being a downer, Mr. Stark. Sometimes I just really hate school.
Hope you’re ok.
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
Have you ever seen Star Wars? I watched it with Ned and I love it! We binged the movies on the weekend, then we spent all day talking about it and all the theories we came up with.
Ned really gets me, we’re into the same things and we really laugh a lot. I’m really glad to have him.
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
I can’t really sleep.
I’ll be honest, I write when I can’t sleep. And I have to be real quiet or else Aunt May or Uncle Ben will find out and they’re gonna get worried about me.
I dunno, nothing particularly bad happened today. I mean, Flash was a jerk like always, but it never went too far. I just feel something tight in my chest that won’t really go away. Sometimes I find it hard to breathe, like I’m still stuck in that locker.
Now that I think of it, not even Ned knows about the locker thing. I guess only the janitor knows. And you. Kinda.
But I think everyone knows Flash taunts me and they don’t really do anything. But I don’t want my aunt and my uncle getting worked up about it. I feel like my school wouldn’t really care anyway.
Would you care, Mr. Stark?
I dunno. Maybe not.
Writing to you helps anyway.
So… thanks.
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
Liz is so pretty.
She’s a girl in my school. She’s not in my grade but she’s in the Decathlon with me. She’s smart and funny and cute and gorgeous…
Flash can tell and yeah, he loves being a jerk about it.
Liz is nice to me. Well, she’s nice to everyone. But she compliments me and I feel all fuzzy inside. It’s so weird.
I kinda hate that I started writing stuff to her too. I’m DEFINITELY not sending that to her. It’s so cheesy!
I think she likes Star Wars. She was super into my conversation with Ned today. And then I couldn’t really concentrate with her eyes on me, totally interested in what I had to say…
Mr. Stark, what should I do? How do you talk to pretty people?? And why am I asking this to Iron Man???
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
I really hate Valentine’s day.
I mean, I like Liz but she already gets a bunch of stuff, obviously, because she’s the greatest girl ever and it’s not like anything I do would be good enough. But all the Valentine’s cards I get are pranks. Once Flash and his friends pranked me and the card told me to wait after school. And I stayed there and nobody showed up. I even bought flowers and chocolate but I threw them away.
I did make a little card though. But it wasn’t that red heart we’re all familiar with. I kinda modeled it after your new arc reactor, Mr. Stark. I’m not really good at art, but it looked kinda cool.
In the end I just gave it to Ned, because he’s probably the only person who makes me feel good. And he loved the card so much. He gave me chocolate in return!
I guess it wasn’t so bad.
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
It’s my birthday! And I got a camera!
I remember playing with my uncle’s old camera as a kid, and he thought I was a great photographer. So he and my aunt surprised me with a brand new camera! I’m also in a photography extra class so I can learn more!
It’s really fun. I actually love analog photography. I love the whole process, the chemicals, that red light in the dark… It's still a laboratory and I’m all for it.
And at least it’s the class where I can enjoy myself without Flash pestering me so much.
I’m having so much fun!
Sincerely,
Peter Parker
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
Sorry for not writing in a while.
First, would you get mad if I told you I went to Oscorp?
I mean, I went there with my school. It was okay, I guess. Though I would rather go to the Avengers Tower if I’m being honest. I dunno why Midtown never arranged it.
Anyway, I took some cool pictures with my camera. But I think I got bitten by something. Then I learned about the radioactive spiders they kept there. It was creepy. I don’t like spiders.
The bite in my hand looks pretty nasty. In fact my hand kinda hurts. And so does my head.
I should probably stop writing.
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
Okay. A lot of stuff happened.
1) I don’t have to wear glasses anymore. When I try, my vision looks pretty blurry.
2) I can glue myself to things and I think that’s worse when I’m too anxious. I literally couldn’t get out of bed one morning without my hands holding my blanket.
3) I can hear EVERYTHING. All the other floors in the building, even whispers or flies, stuff like that. I can overhear Aunt May and Uncle Ben talking or the calls they have to take.
4) My brain sorta screams when I sense any sort of threat. Like when Flash approached and I felt tense all over.
That definitely has something to do with that radioactive spider.
I had a pretty bad fever, my aunt and my uncle were pretty worried. No one really knew what was going on. I’m just glad it’s over. But now I have to deal with these… powers. And I wish I could turn them off. I thought of getting those soundproof headphones, y’know?
It’s so much. I know you don’t have powers, Mr. Stark, but what would you do if you were me? Would you be able to find something to quiet them down?
I can’t really talk to anyone else about this.
Sincerely,
Peter
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
My Uncle Ben is the greatest guy ever. Besides you, of course.
He loves doing everything with me, like watching movies or going to baseball games. I love doing those things too. However, in the middle of the game, I think I had a “sensory overload”, like Aunt May said. Because I was really overwhelmed by all the screaming, the spit, the smells, the lights… I tried to be strong for my uncle but I made the excuse I had to use the restroom. Uncle Ben was going to take me there but I didn’t want him to lose the game so I decided to go alone. I think he could tell I wasn’t okay because he followed me and took me somewhere quieter. Uncle Ben is probably the most patient man I know because he didn’t get angry at me. In fact he suggested we should go home. I couldn’t really protest because I knew I wouldn’t handle the rest of the game with all those loud people.
He didn’t really talk to me on the ride home, but I heard him talking to Aunt May. He was pretty concerned. He said there was something off about me lately. Aunt May just told him to give me some rest for now.
I started crying in my room.
Now I can’t even enjoy baseball games with my uncle. Nor movies. When I found him watching TV, the noise and the light was too much for me. I felt so bad. I didn’t even eat dinner. Aunt May had to leave me some so I wouldn’t go to bed without any food.
I hate this. I hate these new powers, these sensations.
Why can’t I be a normal kid again?
Sincerely,
Peter
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
I can’t sleep, again. Even less now with these powers.
I have so many more questions to ask you, but there’s one I really want you to answer.
I’m a good kid or at least that’s what everyone tells me. I like to play, I’m a good student and I don't bother anyone. I love Aunt May and Uncle Ben, and I know they love me too. But sometimes, I get sad. I don’t cry even if I want to. My eyes are heavy, I know I’m overwhelmed, but I can’t sleep at all.
Do you get sad, Mr. Stark? What do you do when you get sad? How do you not get sad?
I really want a hug right now but I don’t want to wake up my aunt and my uncle, because they have to go to work early. Is it weird to say I want a hug from you, Mr. Stark? Is it weird to admit I wish you showed up at school to save me from bullies and my own powers? That’s stupid, right?
At least you’re never going to read these letters…
Sincerely,
Peter
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
Uncle Ben died.
He’s gone.
He’s really gone…
Ever since that baseball game, I started feeling more irritated. I distanced myself more and more. The bullying at school got worse. I started doing stupid things to my body. I didn’t want to tell you, Mr. Stark, but I began cutting myself again. I kind of stopped for a while but the habit returned. And when Uncle Ben found out, he got really upset. Like, he was more upset that I didn’t tell him I was suffering than he was angry at me being a brat. Even then, Uncle Ben could never bring himself to hate me.
But I was stupid. I ran away from home. Of course, he went after me.
And all I could hear was the shot.
Uncle Ben was lying on the floor, bleeding so much red.
I tried to say I was sorry… but I was too late.
He was gone.
I didn’t even want to go after who shot him. If anything, I killed Uncle Ben. I hurt him and I killed him.
Aunt May cried the entire week. I even stayed with her at night. I knew she didn’t want to be alone.
So the apartment is empty. Lonely. There is no TV airing games or movies anymore.
At least Ned is coming over sometimes or letting me stay over at his house, because I can’t handle that emptiness. It’s worse than loud noises.
I kind of wish Uncle Ben hated me so maybe he wouldn’t have gone after me.
I kind of wish he and Aunt May never took me in.
I wish I was never born at all.
My life just gets worse and worse… What's the point?
What’s the point, Mr. Stark?
I should’ve been shot, not Uncle Ben. He didn’t deserve it. I did.
I’m sorry, Mr. Stark. I’m sorry I’m this mess.
I wish I could just die.
--
Dear Mr. Stark,
I think I’m managing my senses now.
I made my own suit. It’s not fancy like your suits of armor, but it helps me focus.
I guess I was inspired by you and Uncle Ben. I could use my powers for good.
So… I’m a vigilante, I guess.
You can call me Spider-Man.
I don’t really do anything interesting but I help the best I can.
School is not really going well, I had to give up a lot of things, mainly sports. That would just draw too much attention.
I have to be there for everyone, or else I know I’m going to face my really bad thoughts. I don’t want them to take over me.
I don’t think I’ll have a lot of time to write, so I want to thank you, Mr. Stark. I know you’re not going to read this, but you helped me in a really bad phase of my life. You still do. I hope you know you inspire a lot more people out there. Thank you.
Sincerely,
Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man
--
(Chapter 2)
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juneviews · 10 months
Note
Hey!! As a writer I want to know what's your take on confession scenes. Like best to worst? And personal faves!
hi hi! ooooooh, that's a good question! I'm gonna be honest, I don't think I remember a particularly bad confession lol, I think usually they're either basic & forgettable OR beyond iconic! here's the iconic ones that I literally adore beyond words, though:
SEANWHITE'S ROOFTOP CONFESSION
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who is surprised this is the first confession I need to talk about? okay, okay no need to all raise your hand :'))) so one very special thing about not me is that there is no "I love you" or "I like you" said, yet both seanwhite & danyok are the most loving, strongest couples I know. seanwhite are literally the most lovey-dovey couple in existence, 100% written as soulmates, yet their love isn't expressed in the way we usually expect. in that respect, sean's confession on the rooftop which barely feels like one, is literally the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. "this is the goal that keeps me alive. and you are too." BITCH, THIS AIN'T A LOVE CONFESSION, THIS IS SEAN TELLING WHITE HE KEEPS HIM MOTHERFUCKING ALIVE!!! this is it, bruh. no other love scene hits this deep. I'm crying again. bye.
TEH & OH-AEW'S NIGHTLY CONFESSION
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oh no, what a surprise that my other all time favorite bl is here too 😲 we were talking about confessions that aren't really one, and this falls in that category too! I just love how effortlessly the scene goes by, without ever saying "I like you", and the way oh-aew confronts teh about him liking him too in a way that is not attacking him but also not ignoring the reality of the feelings that they possess. a beautiful, calming scene that is burned in my heart forever, just like the entire show!
JACKZI'S STAIRS CONFESSION
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there are very few scenes that make me cry bc of how heartfelt they are, and this is one of them! the acting is top tier, the writing absolutely beautiful & I cannot imagine this scene being more perfect than it is! it's not even a classic confession bc there's no "I love you" exchanged (very much a pattern for me atp lol), but simply zao zi saying "don't leave" is enough to convey how much these characters care for each other! this scene is beautiful despite it being incredibly sad, in a way that HITS so much bc they essentially have their most innocent, happy go-lucky character completely break down after a betrayal. it's, in my honest opinion, the actual saddest scene of the show bc it's so unexpected & cuts so deep. truly one of my all time favorite bl scenes & an absolutely amazing way to see these characters confirm their feelings for each other.
UNTWO'S MULTIPLE CONFESSIONS
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so everyone must know that I'm the untwo queen, and it's truly bc both untwo confessions scenes are literally some of my favorite scenes EVER. the first one is a cinematic masterpiece! un is holding a door as he works on the decor for the student play, and two is the one to confront him about his feelings. this scene feels super raw & uncomfortable bc it truly IS for both characters, and ultimately, un, who wanted to escape from the situation, ends up professing his love for two who interrupts him bc he can't take it. this scene is pure tension & pain, just like I love them lol, and the metaphorical (and physical) door between un & two is an amazing concept for the shot!
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the second confession is EVEN MORE ICONIC, though! theory of love is such a good show bc it's literally the best homage to movies I've ever seen, and after breaking things off with both un & linn, two finds a copy of 'the perks of being a wallflower' (a very good movie I love which makes this scene even more powerful imo) which is a movie he lent to p'un and the movie that unites them. realizing he can't let p'un move abroad, in perfect romcom cliche, two rushes to the pier where the last boat to the mainland has left, only for p'un to have already come there to confront two one last time. the scene that ensues is beautifully written, and the sentence "you know the answer" IS MAIN COUPLE IN AN ICONIC ROMCOM WORTHY!!! it hits so hard & is exactly why, despite untwo being only a side ship, they were my favorite ship for 3 years before seanwhite showed up lol.
ALSO kudos to tangmolove's confession where the acting is really good & phunnoh's confession that's so heartfelt!!! lmao this is truly just a list of some of my favorite ships :')
xxx
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pipfinn4 · 3 months
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i just read the perks of being a wallflower in one sitting. i used a tag for every song, book or movie mentioned and every time charlie wrote something i identified with. i made a playlist of every song charlie named, or that he had put on a mixtape. i am now rereading the book. i am annotating moments that stick out to me, adding personal memos and parts of my life that i can relate to what charlie experienced. i have already cried several times, even though i know what is going to happen because i've read it and seen the movie several times. i no longer feel like just a reader, instead a character experiencing life alongside charlie, and that is the beauty of literature. because as much as charlie will never know me, i will know him.
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