#i like to narrate he has so much to SAY

[vvienne]

I literally woke up in the middle of the night like God will dark rise is so fucking screwed. The line that’s like. “Everyone wanted to kill the Dark King.” What’s the part where he looks at Violet helplessly, haunted, almost pleading for mercy? But of course he reveals nothing of substance to anyone. Elizabeth is too young to understand but the reader knows what “Her relationship with that boy was…unnatural” can mean. Tying him to bedposts? Failing to strangle him? What else? Never not even once seeing beyond a mythological identity Will himself didn’t know he had? What did he think was the reason? That he was just intrinsically hateful? Of course he says nothing. Of course Violet can’t trust him- he’s given her nothing as painfully real as what she’s given him. So he gives her the sword hoping at least he can die at the hands of someone he loved, but even that doesn’t work out - she gives the sword to a Visander still furious at SARCEAN. The pattern continues; no one looks at Will, who vomits when he realizes what’s happened to James, Will who is much of a liar and killer and sneak as Elizabeth accuses but nonetheless wants to be different. Even when he doesn’t remember his own past. There’s no way out for him that doesn’t hurt. Hope this obsession passes soon given the one and a half years of waiting required for book 3

#dark rise series #dark heir #rarely does a cliffhanger pain me so much #bc rarely am I ever THAT invested in a plot I am sad to say #nona the ninth was so cathartic in of itself I’m content marinating before alecto #BUT PACAT ONLY EVER GIVES EMOTIONAL CRUMBS #have any of these bitches ever known peace fr #maybe this is what reading princes gambit and not immediately having the follow up might’ve been like #honestly it’s possibly damen and Lauren just generally had less problems tho #more than his relationship even with James. will/Violet is perhaps the genuine source of like. I WISH HED GIVEN HER A REASON. #the narration that describes Violet as Will’s star in the night…….. like fuck fine #will can’t reach any level of genuine intimacy with James bc the mess of fraught noncon dynamics is this massive unspoken horrible thing #wills identity is personal w James in a way it is with no one else but James is so fucking oblivious of undercurrents it comes unbalanced #and will knows it. but (as far as we know) violet isn’t reborn has no history with sarcean the dark king she’s literallt just Some Guy #and that almost makes it worse???????? that they are so loyal to each other even as he’s keeping a massive secret? #they weren’t dated or destined to entangle the way will is w characters like James and Katherine #and I think that makes his rship with Violet possibly the realest and truest experience of trust and love will has ever had #like it’s nothing bro. truly she knows nothing about him other than his lies of omission and her faith in him goodness which may or may not #beiltimately justified. but that was probably as honest and close will ever got to anyone. and him to her.

[add1ctedt0you]

What a plot twist you were. [x]

#Like. The narrator introduces jc to us as the antagonist #Then we got to know him. Not who people think he's. But who he really is #And we saw jc giving wwx a piggyback. Giving him soup. Rescuing him. Putting himself between wwx and any danger (madam yu/wen soldiers) #And even the staged fight. It's yk. Staged #jc wanted to protect wwx at any cost. But wwx wasn't willing to compromise. But jc did #The fight was wwx's idea. Because jc is an enabler (just like jfm and jyl) #jc is ready to bend for his loved ones sake #The point is. Every action jc takes. Is in the name of his loves ones' safety. And surprise. wwx is one of the people jc really cares about #Even after wwx' return. Aside a broken cup. jc isn't doing much to stop wwx or anything. We know that jl was able to free wwx from Zidian #only because jc - Zidian's primary master- wanted it! #And jc fling himself into danger countless times to save wwx even though wwx can't sit still with him for a hot minute #What I wanted to say it's that the jc is presented to us - the mean ungrateful man- is very different from the real jc - #the indulgent uncle who rolls his eyes at his nephew antics. the brother who buries the hatchet for his sister's happiness. #the uncle who kinda wants to help wn to get up from the floor because he was an ass to jc but he helped jl and that's what matters to jc #the sect leader who let two women speak freely their mind in a patriarchy society #People better than me have already said this. shit I can't remember my point lmao #Like. jc is presented as an antagonist but what this man wanted was an apology and an explanation #This post is a mix of a rant I wrote last year (ha) after seeing a bad take. About what I don't remember lmaoo. And me wanting #to make gifs of wzc in this scene. Why does he look so good. It should be illegal. Seriously #jiang cheng #*mgifs

[sacrificial-lamb-sam]

hot take this was one of the coolest shots in the show and I think it's under appreciated

#the OBSESSION the fact it was hidden away the fact that he coloured the eyes him self #the eyes look off because he did it in a rush #scott carey you might be my favorite psychic kid bc of the collage in your closet #we got precious few moments with you but this collage tells us so much #like the focus of this shot is sam seeing it and being like ''oh shit this guy is connected to the yellow eye demon some how'' #and the show tells us scott was afraid. it tells us he was confused and scared #reminds me of that tumblr post that's like ''shark week became my religion the couch was my church'' #''when you spend so much time on something on trying to understand it you can't help loving it a little you can love something and still be- #-scared of it'' #and that post has lived in my mind rent free for awhile bc it. it's just so good #and the obsession the narrator has with sharks is understandable #anyway scott feels the same way about yellow eyes that the writer of that post has about sharks #fear but a desire to understand to the point of obsession #take a shot every time i say obsession in these tags #but like. there's only one word to describe the yellow eye collage. obsession #azazel had taken over Scott's life

[merlinemrys]

sometimes u just have to write an experimental rare pair fic that no one will read besides urself just to soothe ur soul

#i say rare pair as if they aren't literally canon married but . god knows people who actively read romantic arthur gwen centric fics #ANYWAY. WRITING IN SECOND PERSON WOOOOOOOOOOOO #god i love second person it's just so . delicious #second person narrator that's ACTUALLY just arthur but he is distancing himself from his OWN narrative so much bc he does not believe his #body is his own (IT ISN'T. not really) but like believing he will always marry for the good of his kingdom and not for love and then he #falls in love with gwen and he can't fall in love with her he can't! but he has and GOD I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS. #writing #tbt #tais toi lys #* #fic: thread of gold

[prettyboykatsuki]

i have deep desire to write for demon slayer (and by write for it im specifically talking about zenitsu currently.) but the story is so deeply impacted by it's setting that its gonna take at least two weeks of research to do it any justice so the plans r Delayed

#aristotle.txt #writing for my hero = easy because im insane and know every inch of it #writing for anything else = impossible #i figured trying to find fic for it was going to feel like this in the first place #from my limited understanding the story takes place in the events directly after japans first industrial revolution #which means that the advent of technology is not only integral to the story telling but there's also like an unreal #amount of sociopolitical context for most of the major details #writing for my hero is easy because a society post tech is very easy to imagine. we live in it lol #demon slayer in particular takes place during the emergence of industry #what makes zenitsu an interesting character to me is that his narration is influenced directly by his class and proximity to modernity #he has a specific level of cynicism i can only describe as post industrial. whether that be his sense of cowardice over tanjiro/inosuke #or his attitude towards women. the way he behaves and how he critically analyzes certain kinds of behavior #like im currently watching the entertainment district arc and i think inosukes reaction vs zenitsus pretty much exactly covers it #where inosuke is overstimulated and tanjiro is reserved - zenitsu recognizes the district for what it is. that quality makes him stand out #a lot among them at least to me. i love hearing him talk sooo much lmfao. #anyways. all that to say. i want to write zenitsu but i need to do more reading to make it any good so . pray for me i suppose #zenitsu the embodiment of men used to chop trees and go to war fr

[lunanoc]

might as well throw in some pingxie thoughts while i’m at it

i have. many things to say about pingxie. but on the subject of reducing relationships to one dimensional tropes specifically, it does them just as much of a disservice.

my favorite variation of pingxie is in the books (very shocking i know, although that’s technically the original them and not a variation), and by comparison to what’s shown in the dramas (which are fun and self-indulgent don’t get me wrong), the books are the slowest of slow burns. never forget we see everything in them from wu xie’s pov exclusively (at least the main entries), so we can only infer xiaoge’s own growth and development from what wu xie sees of it, but it very much exists.

wu xie has a complicated opinion of xiaoge in the earlier books, mostly because he doesn’t quite know what to make of this man who looks younger than he is and completely blows him off on their first meeting (blows everyone off in fact) much to his displeasure, which leads to the initially derogatory nickname ‘menyouping’, and yet is also vastly competent and knowledgeable. he’s cold and indifferent, yet wu xie feels safe around him and trusts him more than he likely should from the get go, mostly because wu xie’s good at reading people’s intentions and character on an instinctive level he doesn’t always manage to rationalize early on. he’s fascinated and would like to know him better, but also finds him deeply unfathomable, even incomprehensible.

and then you have xiaoge, who it merits saying, is repeatedly described as largely indifferent to most things (and he genuinely is), doing what he deems necessary but otherwise not bothering to involve himself with other people or social niceties. this is a man who spends his time off to the side sleeping or contemplating the sky, and yet in the space of four books he goes from not giving two shts about wu xie (or more than he would the average person) to voluntarily interacting with him, siding with him in quiet ways, helping him through unspoken little acts all the way up until a turning point wherein he first tries to keep his distance from wu xie en route to tamutuo in an effort to keep him from getting further involved than he already is in dangerous things he has no concept of, except by then he’s shown enough uncharacteristic interest in wu xie that wu xie notices he's being cold and distant. this all culminates in the infamous moment where xiaoge eventually lets himself act on thoughts he’s likely never fully analyzed himself, let alone shared with another person, leading to the “if i disappeared no one would notice” moment. 

and from there all the way until post ten years later and into things like yucun biji, the reality is that pingxie were never the serious immortal and the dorky clumsy mortal boy he adopts, nor are they the vulnerable strong one and the eventual protector, or any other trope variation really. pingxie are two people who at the start stand on opposite sides of a line neither of them were ever meant to cross, and to all intents and purposes should never have met for how very different the worlds they come from are. they’re people that circumstance threw together who chose to stay together, and keep choosing each other. they don’t need each other to exist, and could have gone their separate ways had they wanted to, but the importance of their relationship lies in that they stay together by active choice, and that in doing so, they meet in the middle.

wu xie matures and comes to understand a number of things through hardship while xiaoge is behind the gate that untether him just enough from the world that xiaoge isn’t quite so unfathomable anymore, while xiaoge comes down from his imposed pedestal just enough that he tethers himself to wu xie (and pangzi) and learns to live rather than exist

neither of them became a different person for the other, and the core of their relationship (and the beauty of it) is in the harmony and understanding they eventually achieve. reducing all of that to archetypes is honestly a little tragic

#this has nothing to do with the point i'm making here #but for the record #most of this is the basis of why i like to hc pingxie as being on the ace/demi spectrum #and as having no real prior romantic and/or sxual experience besides with each other if we're talking shipping #bc neither of them really show any kind of special interest in other people besides each other really #and the way their relationship develops is a precedent for both of them respectively #in more not directly related #there's so many sweet moments in yucun biji specifically that show the care and regard they have for each other #xiaoge telling wu xie when he leaves to roam the mountains and approximately when he'll be back so he won't worry #vs wu xie being on a private quest to find something xiaoge genuinely likes to add to their restaurant menu #and feeling some type of way about xiaoge liking the snails and sneaking candies into the car on their trip back from banai #they never use words not really #BUT THEY CARE #SO MUCH #it helps a lot that wu xie happens to be a sometimes uncannily self-aware narrator #and he'll say the most heartfelt and profound things so matter-of-factly sometimes you have sit there and take it in #i feel very normal about them #dmbj #pingxie #wu xie #zhang qiling #dmbj meta

[bitchthefuck1]

🔥 for kaz? Like it could be a general take about his character or a headcanon or something. or 🔥 about any of the crows in general

I feel like my more deep-cut opinions about Kaz are less unpopular and more just like. not as common? Like, beyond the "stop treating his cane like an accessory and acting like he's a sociopath" I guess the only one I can think of is that I feel like we don't talk enough about how curiosity and the need to figure out how things work is like. Kaz's most foundational trait. Maybe it's just because I know a few people like that in real life, so I can see how it runs under all the more obvious things about him, but I feel like it doesn't get emphasized or acknowledged nearly enough. Like if you asked someone what his most prominent personality trait is, most people wouldn't say that, which feels like an oversight to me.

#like it's his most consistent drive that we see over his entire life #it colors so much of his narration and how to talks about and views things #like he / became/ jaded and violent and vengeful and whatever other thing you want to point to as his 'thing' but the 'how do i #crack this?' has always been there and always will be #kaz reitveld had it and kaz brekker has it and whatever the fuck he does next that'll still be there. its one of the foundational traits #that people are pointing to when they say 'people dont change'. sure your life is hugely shaped by your experiences and circumstances and #life is an endless personal evolution but there are a handful of core things about a person that stay the same and make them them #anyway this got really long and rambley #finally an unpopular opinion i don't mind tagging lol #kaz brekker #six of crows #soc #asks

[britneyshakespeare]

it is weird being an aromantic asexual who is incidentally attractive. like. i just came back from a concert with my friends who have known me for years and know that about me. some of the very few real-life friends who know that about me actually and i only told them relatively recently. regardless. the only reason i had bothered to bring it up w them is that they had seen me in SO many situations that telling them “i’m asexual” was if anything just clarification. just confirmation, like, don’t worry. it’s not an inability to attach to others or whatever. if you can’t tell. like they’d seen me be pursued by quite a few people in our time as friends and at some point it seems like a curious thing if i only ever seem to feel negatively about anyone who’s attracted to me, ever, no matter who it is. and they were understanding and i knew they’d be. yeah.

we were talking on the way back about bucket list concerts we’d still like to see. we saw stromae which was a really big one of mine (my fucking boy btw, i had an amazing time). i mentioned that i don’t have very many, as i’m rarely the person to be like “yeah, let’s go to a concert” unless i have people i know i wanna go with. like i’ve been meaning to see the jonas brothers w my sister and sisters-in-law ever since they came back because it’d be a fun thing for us since we always listen to them together. 

but i would genuinely love to see super junior someday, like just for myself, wherever whenever if i was just able to get transportation (i don’t drive). i’ve loved suju for years but i got really back into them in 2020 in the pandemic as a sort of nostalgia comfort thing (but also the music they’ve put out in recent years is like, literally the best in their discography, they just keep getting better w age). and i had to go on this tangent to explain it, right?

in the first months of the pandemic, there was something weird happening to people psychologically. some kind of end-of-the-world loneliness. i mentioned that i had like 5 or 6 different people in my DMs at the time interested in me. not all of them men. and the friend who was driving said “you know, diana, if this were literally anyone else talking, i would think that this is some enormous humblebrag—”

and i like. didn’t even think about it that way. i was just trying to make my point that i had a serious thought in 2020 of like, when the world opened back up, just doing one (1) seriously manipulative thing in my life and convince one of those men who was thirsting for me to buy me tickets to super junior and go with me. it was hypothetical. this hasn’t happened and all but certainly will not. i would not feel good taking advantage of someone’s feelings like that. 

but i had to go on a tangent even before that because i was like. oh my goodness. i didn’t even realize that was a humblebrag. i’m sorry. i’m just telling a story.

#the politics of being a pretty young woman #tales from diana #i also wouldn't have felt comfortable telling anyone that anecdote about myself if they had known less about me than my friends i was with #so i guess i wouldn't be in danger of humblebragging. but sometimes i think i do? by mistake. #like when i talk about my social life in the past i always mention no one openly liked me in high school. not one person. #it very much affected how i saw myself. bc bullshit. young girls. male approval. y'know. #but in retrospect now i'm better able to tell when a boy had some kind of crush on me so i might mention it like 'he thought i was cute' #and one time a different friend i had. but one who i have also told im asexual (im trying to do that more) said to me #'you know for how unpopular you say you were in high school it seemed like a lot of ppl liked you' #i mean. yes? it's complicated. i was most certainly not popular i can tell you that. #i was more of a 'hey goob nice binder' 'hey goob wanna hang out at my house after school?' [narration: they all hated me...] kinda kid. #i probably kept myself from making friends wo realizing it but also lots of cliques i would've liked to be part of very much ignored me. #i was hot on the margins. a truly underrepresented social archetype... except that's literally every teen movie so maybe not. #i didn't have a big win in the final act that's the difference. #also before the concert we were talking about one of our other friends who is just. so fuckin funny. #like we were all talking about how much we love him. and they said they had been talking about who in the group chat we're in #has the most 'pull' and im like. pull? #like who could pick up the most ppl successfully. hypothetically. #both of them ranked me high :^) i was like. thank you. #they asked me to ponder on the topic myself and try to come back to it but i think im just confused by the concept of 'pull' itself #stromae has pull. that is all.

[hauntingblue]

Luffy eating the cookie warriors fueled by his want to get to sanji and forced by nami is so fucking funny

#little sanji in his little rain coat..... #we cant let the queen get a stomach ache lmao #omg queen dont eat that jesus #sanji was wearing his bangs the opposite side of his siblings and mom but now he wears it the same.... #so much stuff in one piece about death and being worthy of living.... robin sanji ace.... #wars into the east blue??? scaling the red line??? damn #reyju has to just go after her brothers and patch him up??? do the guards not notice??? lmao #i mean if they fed him and gave him all tje kitchen equipment #it is kinda sad sanji was made to fight. failed just by being born normal then decided to become a cook and then just ended up fighting #like still...... i know this is a shounen and thats the point but damn... if he could just cook #the scene of the mask key.... #not the scene of reyju telling sanji he will find kind people being cut with his brothers fighting him... #well thank god their father said not to beat sanji bc the ceremony was getting close... damn #talking tag #watching one piece #episode 804 #i am fucking crying the recap showing luffy fighting and then then it changes to sanji and the narrator says meanwhile sanji is being beaten #by his brothers and being called a failure akajdkas #oh no luffy is hungry..... pack it up boys..... #omg the hungry meme but with luffy and the cookie soldiers.... #luffy: i am so hungry.... the cracker soldiers front facing the camera: how hungry #is this cracker guy going to fight or is he just gonna keep clapping #nami is so galaxy brai for this..... got luffy a juice to dip the cookies in and everything... #this is so funny omg luffy's stomach is going to fix what gear fourth couldn't #omg sanjis gentleman way backstory.... about time #zeff getting booed bc he doesnt want women chefs akdhks (bc he wont kick a woman and that's how he teaches ahdkajs) #zeff master of woman treating i didn't expect that... not his kintamas aldjakdj #sanji crossed legged in front of the mirror smoking.... FA[GUNSHOTS] #cracker got tired akdjaksjsks mission accomplished #episode 805

[books-apples-socks]

i'm sorry was someone going to tell me i was going to have to suffer pages of overindulgent prose that treats disabled people like flesh husks steampowered by the brain or did i have to find out by stumbling onto it every time neelay gets his pov segments in acclaimed pulitzer prize winning novel "the overstory" myself?!

#worthless legs #see it's the repetition of for me ngl #i'm going to say this as someone who has also suffered a spinal injury that saw their muscles atrophy #it's one thing for the character to see themselves that way #if he carried the internalised trauma of his disability #but um that's the narrator speaking to me about neelay not neelay speaking to me about himself #third person limited is not the way to do this if that was the intended effect #this book is my nemesis #i wanted to like it so much #the overstory

[divorcemotif]

"oh hey a real person followed me, I should look at their blog"

soon

"...perhaps I should listen to Eskew."

oh boy you caught my blog after an exciting weekend lmao

I absolutely recommend eskew! I don't have a lot of coherent thoughts, since I got into it over a very physically and mentally draining summer job and have yet to relisten, but it left an impression for sure. I will say what there is of an overarching narrative felt a bit jolty to me in places, for lack of a better term— I think you get the vibe of a show that’s figuring itself out somewhat as it goes, however the ideas are very interesting and I could make a long list of moments that really really affected me. my recent posts probably give a good sense of what I liked most abt it; david ward is just. endlessly interesting as a character imo. the writing’s good— there's a kind of.. ironically humorous edge to a lot of my favourite episodes, something I’d have to relisten to properly articulate. there's a tic of referring to one-off characters by a title instead of a name— the correspondence editor, the architect, the witness— that scratches something in my brain. in contrast with the slimy fleshiness of much of the horror, the sound design is just nice, actually— the rain never stops in eskew and the tone of the narration stays pretty level no matter what’s being described. there are only two narrators and I found both of their voices pleasant enough to close my eyes to on the subway after a long day. very solid show

#ask #eskew #I don’t usually post this much abt eskew but that jonathan sims vs david ward most sopping wet podcast man poll awakened smth in me . #got me itching to write like 1000 words abt how it’s ultimately an unfair comparison #but I havent listened to either podcast in A While so I don’t trust myself to be like. right. abt anything #I’ll just say. #eskew has its narrator in the middle of the horror right off the bat. it’s more immediately immersive and far less grounded— #early episodes you have rlly no guarantee that anything david is perceiving is real or what ‘real’ even means within the rules of his world. #even later on it’s p ambiguous how many of the people he interacts with are actually people and this uncertainty gets exploited a lot #basically. in tma the world looks broadly like our own and is being affected by outside forces where in eskew the setting IS the horror #if I were writing an essay abt this I might make it abt the ways each show plays w humour and absurdity— #the caricature of jon’s initial presentation is a grounding force at the start #where eskew consistently uses absurdity to unground you and keep you uncertain #ofc the initial security to this divide between jon and the statements gradually dissolves #but tma just has a lot more structure the whole time w both the epistolary kind of format and the world.eskew gets. abstract . #what I’m saying is david is infinitely wetter and more miserable bc his story both requires and allows for it. tonally. #and because the rain literally and metaphorically never stops. #david never gets a fucking break even when he gets a fucking break bc he can never KNOW if he’s really getting a fucking break #or if the city that loves him soso much is about to turn on him #(also hes far more chaotic morally I think on account of just being. further out of touch). #at least tma has enough supporting characters who are definitively real people by the rules of its universe #for you to have found family expectations it can repeatedly subvert. #david is a half drowned rat. #. however jonathan sims has more fans and could never lose 😔

[theloveinc]

Ugliest thing in the world: people writing out bakugo saying “hah”

#ITS SO CRINGE AND WEIRD IM SORRY I JUST HATE IT #like stop reminding me he does that😭 #anyway I just bring it up bc I’m kinda writing something and I want to put hah bc it’d fit really well #but I hate it too much to even allow it for MYSELF #so I’m putting huh instead #LMAOLLL #me writing? what a joke #actually it’s not bc #I been writing a lot I just haven’t been finishing anything #and I haven’t liked what I have finished #anyway my dialogue has all been super weird lately #too #not bad really but like. dry #not fanficcy enough #if that makes sense #like I’m narrating a real conversation #so it doesn’t flow like a fictional story #and takes me out of the scene #but I don’t know how to do it better bc… that’s how I envision happenings #by thinking of what ppl would actually say #but then it’s BORINNGGGGGGGGGGGG #and I’m scared. #like always #anyway #uhhhhhhhhhhhhh HAAAA? #actually now that I think abt it it isn’t that bad #but it hasn’t to be used properly #so if u see me doing it. ignore it. #caitie blabs

[ghostabocky]

thinking about kh3/khux/khdr and wondering if there’s any iconography or characters who have the potential for the same sort of intrigue as lingering will/the mysterious figures/the kh2 secret ending

#angel.txt #i mean this in like... how we hear ''the disappeared'' when fighting the kh1 enigmatic man #and then we hear it again in kh2 when we fight xemnas for the first time #how we know nothing abt who or wat lingering will is until we hear motifs from rage awakened come back in terra's theme #and finally see the conclusion of his story #the entire kh2 secret ending and it's blatant recreation at the end of bbs #things that are like. very much different from theories being proven true‚ like the luxu-xigbar reveal #bc we didn't know anything abt xemans in kh1 or terra in kh2 or young xehanort in bbs! #and im looking at like... ok there's yozora #but we know his face even if he says its not what he ''really looks like'' #so it already isn't going to have the same sort of intrigue as the mysterious figure/enigmatic man/lingering will #and there's also dark inferno but the music that plays during that boss is. the same as like half the kh3 bosses #there's nothing to look forward to in that regard #kh3/khux also have secret endings that play around with concepts we're familiar with to a certain degree #so im like. i think im just 👀 at sigurd rn #faceless and also confirmed to be the person narrating in the kh4 teaser? hmm? #now give me smth in missing link that'll HIT DIFFERENT in kh4 #sorry im probably making no sense lmao #i just think that sort of subtle excitement has been missing from recent kh stuff #that moment of realization as you recognize a musical motif‚ or the satisfaction of an answer at the end of a long story #im not really here for like. *who* the MoM is unless its like. oh shit we've heard this theme before. oh god oh fuck

[maggot-monger]

this book is everything, my mans “lucio” is telling the narrator about the beetle he keeps as a pet going “i like to imagine that this is the vampire soul of the dead woman whose chest it crawled out of! ah i’m so fun, ta ta.” obsessed with him

#literally he says ta ta #sorrows of satan blogging #'lucio' being lucifer's cute little pretending to be human name ofc #(the narrator has a crush on him that is visible from space. and like why wouldn't he i guess... #this hot dude who is absolutely the biggest freak you've ever met shows up who isn't going to be in love #lucio is SO disappointed by how much people like him lmao)

[grapejuicegay]

okay i need opinions on this. 

pete’s little “is he talking to me or the hedgehog?” and “wait is this poisoned? i don’t want to die like a fool”

could vegas hear him or not

#because i can't decide what is better #vegas can hear him but chooses to pretend he can't #so he can hear pete's running commentary to himself this entire time #there's a lot of cursing vegas out #(he likes it) #sometimes it's just pete thinking little snippets of his next plan out loud #(he really likes that) #OR #vegas is so single minded that if he's focused on something else #he literally won't hear pete muttering to himself #pete catches onto that at some point #starts saying whatever bullshit comes to mind #to see how far he can take it #until eventually he's just narrating his whole day #(it's a lot of 'i'm standing i'm standing i'm still standing' #'oh the hedgehog squeaked') #just so he has something to do #plus he figured at some point vegas will tune in and it will annoy him #i realise how little sense this makes #i am just enjoying vegaspete too much #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series

[drownedbycoffee]

THEY AREN'T THE FEARS ANYMORE!! THEY'RE DESIRES

(SPOILERS for TMA, and all of TMAGP episodes so far)

Okay, here me out

Tmagp1: Darla wants to hear Arthur's voice again. She even says: "I just couldn’t face the thought of the rest of my life never hearing him again, I had to try" and later on she even says: "But I had to know, so I went to the cemetery."

Tmagp1: RedCanary wants to know about the Magnus Institute. They want to know why it's listed under 'cleared' when there's no evidence of it. Hence why they go and explore it.

Tmagp2: Daria wants that absolute perfection. She wants to change who she is and get out of that dark place. When she talks about the thing that she felt was missing, she says, "... and that’s when I decide I need a tattoo. I had a couple already – just little things on my shin and my wrist – but I decided I needed something big. Something that really changed my look." She also mentions when talking about Ink5oul that "they just kept pressing me about my life, about why I wanted the ink" instead of asking what design she wanted. And when she got the tattoo she describes herself as now being, "Someone I wanted to know more about." Afterwards she even says how "For the first time ever [she] wanted to attempt a self-portrait. Something real and physical, [she] wanted to feel the brushes in my hands and the oil on [her] fingertips." I think a lot of her statement is about her desire and impulsive need for that perfection and that wholeness that she has been aspiring to for her whole life.

Tmagp3: Samuel wants to stay hidden. He wants and he "need[s] to get up, get out of here for treatment." He wants to get better and most of his delirious thoughts are the things that he wants, or feels like he needs. E.g. "I so much want to see it [the sun] again. This night seems endless. I want to be warm again. I am terribly afraid. Thank god for Maddie. I need to treat her better."; "I just need to rest."; "I need to be careful or we’ll drift apart." And then obviously as the narrative continues, Samuel wants to grow and 'put down roots'.

Tmagp4: The narrator wants to be revered and accepted into the Royal Court Orchestra of the Palatinate. He wants to show off and impress. The violin "was a creature with needs and purpose of its own. The needs were simple enough. Blood. Flesh." It has these needs and desires.

So far, I'm interpreting it to be that everything so far can be interpreted as a desire of sorts, varying in the strength and intensity of it. Obviously, fear is still a big part of it all, because if you want something so badly, aren't you afraid of it being stolen from you? Of it being out of your grasp? Of it being unachievable or impossible in some capacity? Of it being a lie?

Even Sam wants to find out more. He wants to know the why and the reason for things. Gwen wants Lena's job. Collin wants to fix all these bugs and keep Freddie running. Alice wants to just get on with it because she found out that wanting to know the 'why' of things is dangerous.

I think that somehow when the Web took all the Fears into a different universe, they morphed into something else. Or they changed to fit what was the most prevalent thing in that universe, because after all, everyone wants something, even if it's something small and inconsequential. Life and aspects of it has always been characterised by that desire for something. Like people wanting food, shelter, safety, love, warmth, happiness, etc. And I think since the Web was so intwined with Jon and Martin, it absorbed some of their emotions when it found its way into this new world, because after all Jon and Martin wanted to stop Jonah/Elias, to stop the apocalypse, to destroy the Panopticon, to be safe, and they wanted each other. I think the wanting and fear of things are really entwined in it all, though this could be absolute bullshit haha

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