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whocaresstillthelouvre · 2 days

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Hear It In The Silence

Elks Chapter 6

Chapter Rating: Explicit. 18+ (Minors DNI) Chapter Summary: The changing of the season brings a realization of the feelings you hold for Joel. Chapter Warnings: Smut, fluff, feelings, p in v sex, apocalypse birth control (pulling out). Words: 3,900 Pairing: Jackson Joel Miller x Female Reader Series Summary: Life in Jackson is quite comfortable and simple for you. You love teaching your students and running your library, you love the comforts of living here, perfectly complacent with the company of your two cats, guitar, tattered CD book, and a few friends. You like comfortable and simple, though the feelings you feel whenever you see Joel Miller are quite the opposite. Once you meet him, it seems like he needs you in his life as much as you need him. A/N: I listened to "You Are In Love" by Taylor Swift and "Myths" by Beach House on repeat for this chapter. I love writing this happy story for Joel, I hope you like it too.

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Masterlist Playlist

***

“State Of Grace” by Taylor Swift.

Summer is always the busiest time in Jackson, the sun stays up higher making everybody work longer hours. You help out in the gardens after school until the sun dips below the mountains. Joel isn’t home much, patrollers take advantage of the increased daylight staying away for longer stretches of time. You and him try to spend as much time together as you can between your busy schedules and Ellie.

You sit together at community movie nights, his arm slung behind your chair, slowly running his fingers up and down your shoulder.

He sleeps over on the Fridays he’s not on patrol and walks you to your library, always grabbing the box of books you have.

He has Ellie help him fix up your fence and builds you a new feeder holder for your cats, even though they make him sneeze and sniffle, always caring for the things in your life.

He kisses you goodnight on your doorstep when he walks you home, the kiss usually turning heavy, both of you not caring who walks by as Joel backs you up against your door.

You stay over the nights before he leaves, always roused in the morning with a long, deep kiss before he picks up his boots and heads downstairs.

He finds small trinkets and art supplies for you, never coming home empty handed, always breathing you in deeply when you hug him hello.

Everyone knows about the two of you now, Tommy’s big mouth announcing how his big brother has been made a “big ol’ softy” thanks to you when he had one too many at the Bison. It’s a small town, news spreads quick.

Your lives become easily intertwined in the two months you’ve gotten to know him, you wouldn’t have it any other way. You leave CD’s at his place, he leaves an extra pair of boots at yours.

The quiet, bookish artist teacher and the big bad, brooding flannel clad stranger fall for each other like it’s straight out of a film you’d wear out watching in your VCR.

——

It’s late Saturday afternoon, it’s been a long day at the library, made even longer by the fact that today is the day Joel returns from his six nights away on patrol. You move quickly down the busy main street, nodding and saying hello to friends. Never stopping to chat, your destination is to Joel’s house. Your only thought is how much you hope he’s back already. Your heart tries to help you name this feeling.

Quick strides up his familiar walkway, two steps to his door, you now know exactly how to turn the door knob so it doesn’t stick. The house smells like him… a little like sawdust, a little like leather, a little like coffee, now your favorite scent. The comfortability of his home helps you to name it.

“Joel? I’m heeeere,” you shout down his hallway slacking your backpack down your shoulders and laying it near his door. He told you just last week he was going to hang a hook for it since you’re here all the time. Taking the effort to care for your possessions because they’re yours. His thoughtfulness helps you to name it.

There’s no answer, but there is a small jar of flowers on his coffee table. Oranges, purples and pink hued petals packed together haphazardly, all picked out specifically because he knows they’re your favorite colors. You bring the flowers up to your nose and inhale their smell. The sweet floral scent mixed with Joel’s house helps you to name it.

You smile as you imagine his large fingers holding such delicate blooms. His hand grabbing a jar out of the cupboard. His palms pressing dry against his plaid kitchen towel after filling the jar with water from the tap. His face as he takes a step back and intensely judges his arrangement for you. His back aching right in the spot that always ails him as he gently bends down to place the jar of flowers at the corner of his coffee table knowing it’ll be one of the first things you notice when you walk through his door. For someone who has lived and lost a thousand lives, for someone who should be forever cold and closed off to the world, romance is never lost on Joel. You can name the feeling. You’re in lo—

A loud clash comes from the back of the house interrupting your thoughts. You place the flowers back down on the table and race to his kitchen. A movement outside of the window catches your eyes… there he is. Working outside, taking advantage of the beautiful summer weather, never able to rest during the daytime. He just got home from patrol and yet he’s still working. Your heart begins to race as you watch him throw logs of wood into a dilapidated wheelbarrow. You want to run to him, but you know you need to take advantage of being able to watch him work so close and anonymously. His face focused on the task at hand, eyes staring straight forward, brow furrowed in concentration, mouth slightly open and frowning causing his mustache to turn downward. He’s sweaty, you can tell by how golden and dewey his skin is in the sunlight, strong arms glistening with sweat, the fabric of his gray shirt wet in the neck and chest straining with each lift and throw of a log, his unruly hair growing curlier the longer it gets laying a little flatter thanks to the moisture and heat his body is giving off. He pauses for a second, taking a glove off to wipe his brow, you can’t take it any longer. You practically sprint to his back door and throw it open, Joel’s head turning when he hears it creak. His smile, goodness, his smile, it’s so wide and so full of affection, his eyes disappearing behind crinkles on the side. He begins to walk towards you as you walk towards him, your footsteps getting quicker as the distance between you is closed. You’re finally swept up in his arms, head pushed against his chest tightly, inhaling the heady scent of him in after a contented sigh. His shirt is soaked with his sweat, making the scent of him even stronger.

“Hi sweetheart, missed you,” he smiles against your hair.

“Hi, welcome back, missed you too, so much,” your happiness spilling out of your mouth.

“Mm,” he moves a hand up to grab your chin and angle your face to look at him. “Five days is a long time.” Joel licks his lips as he stares down at yours.

He bends forward and kisses you, lips first softly pressing against yours. His hands moves to your face, one hand still clad in a glove, he’s too impatient to touch you to take the time to remove it. His thumbs press into your cheeks a little harder as he deepens the kiss, his tongue beginning to lick at yours. He pulls his lips away before the kiss becomes too indecent for his backyard. His forehead still rests against yours. “So happy to be home,” he whispers.

“Thank you for my flowers, I love them,” you grin.

“Yeah?” Joel joyfully respires against you.

“Mmhmm, they’re so beautiful, I’ve never gotten flowers before.”

Joel pulls his head away so he can look you in your eyes. “M’glad you like them,” his hands still on your face his thumbs swiping back and forth against your cheeks. You’ve doubted his feelings for you, finding it easier to believe you’re living in a daydream where the man you had a crush on is the man who you get to spend all of your extra time with. But this? The way he’s cradling your head in his hands, the way he’s smiling at you, the way his eyes are angled down to look into your eyes, the look on his face when he saw you in the doorway, the way his lips hesitated to pull away wanting to kiss you longer… it’s the same for him as it is for you.

“Let’s get inside,” Joel pulls you out of your thoughts, “s’been a long day for me, just started doing this to make the time go faster until you got here.”

———

“You ever been in the ocean?”

The sun has long gone down, Saturday night is always your favorite night. Joel sits next to you on his couch, hair still damp from his shower with an after dinner cup of coffee that the two of you split, he’s always mindful not to instantly gulp all of it down.

It’s become a shared routine for the two of you, low music coming from the stereo usually a new band that you introduce to him, maybe you’ll read the book you’re currently reading aloud, maybe he’ll fall asleep mouth agape emitting little snores as you quietly sketch, most of the time your night ends watching one of the few movies you share between your two households you falling asleep with your head in his lap. Typically it starts like this, discussions about life before, you always eager to remember, Joel always closing up perfectly happy to let you do all of the reminiscing for the two of you.

“Yeah, couple of times, used to go to a beach town in Texas. You?”

Joel’s answers, always straight and to the point.

“Once. Went on a vacation to California when I was a kid. I don’t remember much about it, but I remember how I couldn’t believe how big the ocean was. I know I was really afraid of swimming too far away from my dad, but wanting to just be taken away by the freedom of the waves. I miss swimming, used to swim for my high school, I don’t even know if I’m any good at all now after all of these years…”

Joel eyes you as you muse through your memories, always ever present right with you whenever you get lost in your thoughts. Your words always making up for his lack. His attentive silence urges your memories on.

“I used to stay in the water for so long, I miss the feeling of my body moving against it and feeling so weightless. We had one of those above ground pools for a few summers when I was younger, I’d put the radio on and just float for literally hours. My mom would have to buy me oil treatments for my hair because it’d get so dry from the chlorine.” You smile at the memory, “I hated the smell of it on my hair, smelled like old lady perfume."

Joel chuckles, leaning in and kissing the top of your head inhaling deeply. “Always love how your hair smells now.”

“Rosemary and yarrow, my own mixture.”

“Love it, you always smell so good and sweet.”

You smile and look up at him. “You always smell like such a man.”

“A man, huh?” He smirks, the lines around his eyes crinkling the exact way you love. You can always tells just how amused he is by how much his eyes disappear. You love that about him.

“Yeah, you just smell capable, always faintly like wood and leather. I love it.”

You love a lot of things about him. In fact everything that you know about him, you love. You love how gruff he can get when he doesn’t get his way, whether you beat him at a card game he brags about his prowess in or if he burnt the toast. You love how his first stop after learning of his patrol assignments is your house, ready to spend whatever remaining time before leaving he has with you. You love how he teases you, always in the sweetest way possible, never any sign of cruelty, never knowing just how funny he is. You love how he’ll adjust the chain of your daisy pendant, gently moving the clasp to the back of your neck, his hand lingering against your skin. You love the communal silence between the two of you as much as you love the small talk the two of you share. You love how your shoulders will brush while you walk together. You love how he always puts the pictures you draw for him around his home turning it into a gallery of your work. You love how he’s become your closest friend, sharing lighthearted inside jokes over meals. You love how he doesn’t even blink twice when he sees you open your door in his shirt, knowing you love how soft and worn it is. You love him, ground shaking, rip roaring love. It feels kind of like being carried away by the ocean.

You never thought you’d be able to feel this way about someone. Joel Miller, the man from Texas, so beautiful, so handsome, so soft, so capable. You know he’s lived a longer life than most even in the reality you and the world share now. You know just what he’s lost and what he’s sacrificed. He’s so complicated and yet you can tell exactly what he always needs.

“You look a little lost there sweetheart, you alright?” Joel pushes a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I’m okay,” you turn towards him, sitting on your knees. “Joel, I love you,” you breathe out in one, long nervous breath. “I– I think I am in love with you.”

Your anxiety beginning to peak at your admission.

Your heart beginning to race.

Your nerves begin to twist inside of you, your doubts begin to make themselves known… until the sight before you quiets all of them.

Joel blinks with the realization realization of your words as his eyes slowly look into yours, he gives you a crooked grin, his dimple deepening as his lips turn upright, a low exhale departs his lips.

“I love you too sweetheart, so much. Been feeling this way for quite awhile, just didn’t want to spook you. In fact, damn near kept me up the first night I realized it. Pretty sure I’ve loved you since the first day you showed up on my doorstep in those overalls with your box full of pretty colors wanting to make me something.”

It’s been named. It’s as golden as Joel’s skin, more tanned and golden from the longer summer days. It’s as warm as the cup of coffee Joel pours out into the chipped owl mug. It’s as sweet as the scent of the flowers he picked for you. It’s as safe as the feeling of being pressed up against his body in an embrace. It’s love.

“I love you.”

“Say it again sweetheart,” Joel pulls you into his chest, your body falling into his. “I love you.”

“Sounds perfect coming out of your mouth,” his hand coming up to lift your chin up towards his face. “I love you too darlin’, let’s go to bed.”

——

You used to call your home your sanctuary, but you’ve found a new oasis at Joel’s house in the second room down the hall upstairs, his bedroom. Light gray walls, a chair in the corner where he always lays his clothes out “just in case,” crates of records and a dilapidated record player that hisses loudly, a bedside table, a drawer of it now filled with your things, a large bed covered in a dark gray thin quilt he uses in the warm months that smells of him.

That same soft quilt you now lay under, your body clad only in his shirt. The way Joel watches you as he removes his jeans and shirt, the way he gently lifts the covers to join you in bed, the way he exhales against your forehead as he kisses it, this time it feels different. This time he pulls you closer, clutching his hands against your back tighter. You rub your bare legs against his, your hands rest against his chest as he leans in for a kiss. Soft lips meet yours, it’s the first time you’ve kissed him in his room since the two of you admitted your love.

It all started with a glance months ago, a nervous meeting in his living room, an accident leaving you splayed out on the road in front of his home, an early morning walk to your library, and a mural for him to remember his past. Now, Joel Miller is kissing you in his bed, surrounded by all of his things, inside his home.

You lean back from the kiss, the soft light of the lamp he’s left on bathing the room in aureate tones. “I love you,” you whisper, the hazel in his eyes shimmer as he gives you the same crooked smile he blessed you with earlier.

“I love you, so much sweetheart,” he returns against your lips, kissing you. The deep timbre of his words radiate through your body, spreading warmth through your limbs as you open your mouth and his tongue licks against yours.

Your hands grab his hair, fingers wrapping around his curly tendrils, breath hitching as he kisses down your neck, goosebumps covering your skin when his tongue dips out to lick the sensitive spot between your neck and collarbone. His hand snakes down to the hem of your shirt to lift up and remove it, taking the opportunity to roll you on your back, planting himself above you. His tongue roams down your body to lick and lave all over your now bare chest, dragging it back up to your mouth leaving a chaste kiss on your lips before moving back down to take a nipple in his mouth.

You squirm underneath him feeling the weight of his cock resting against your thigh, you want him so bad. His hand grabs your ass as you bring your leg up to give him more access to your now aching cunt.

The two of you have fooled around in his bed, you’ve explored each other’s bodies, you’ve had him in your mouth, he’s had you in his, but there’s been a silent agreement between the two of you to not take it a step further. Tonight? Tonight that’s going to change.

You reach a hand down to palm him through his briefs, he smiles against your chest as you moan at how hard he is.

Another moan strangles out of your mouth as his hand moves from your ass to your cunt, running a line from your entrance to your clit and back down.

“So wet f’me, I love how wet you always are f’me. Fuck, I love you baby,” he dips a thick finger into you, his thumb rubs against your clit, “love this pussy.”

“Joel,” you whimper when he adds another finger, “make love to me.”

“I will baby, it’s all I’ve wanted to do, just need to get you ready f’me.”

He buries his fingers deeper, curling them up and hitting the sensitive spot inside of you. Your legs begin to quake as his two thick fingers fuck you through an orgasm, slick spilling out onto his fingers. Your hands clutch the sheets as you stare wide eyed at his handsome face.

“S’beautiful. My beautiful girl, love how you cum for me.”

“Please,” you beg. “Please let me feel you inside me.”

The way his hand pets your knee reminds you of the way he softly touched you the day you fell. A tumble from a rock setting in motion your love story. You’re naked on Joel Miller’s bed begging him to make love to you because of that one little rock. You wish you could put it on display in your home.

He groans as he leans back on his haunches and pulls his briefs down, his cock springing free and already leaking. He’s so hard and so ready. He’s all yours and he loves you.

His large body climbs over you, entrapping you underneath him, the only place you’ve ever wanted to be since that first day you saw him. Your hips rise to try to get his cock closer to you, legs spreading open to offer him your pussy.

He leans down and kisses your neck, licking his way up to your mouth as you grab his cock and begin to pump him bringing it closer to your dripping entrance.

You guide it in, he’s so big it stings. You have to remind yourself to breathe as he slowly begins to move in and out of you. A slight grin on Joel’s face breaks out as he feels your pussy grip him.

“I love you,” tears prick at the edges of your eyes, you’ve never felt so secure, so warm, so full as Joel moves inside of you, his broad body looming over yours. Your legs wrap around his waist as your hands run up and down his broad chest and stomach, feeling his muscles pulse as he moves inside of you.

“Love you too baby, so much,” he groans as your cunt flutters around him. He takes his time, languidly entering and exiting.

He’s everything you’ve ever wanted, a protector, a listener, a lover, his cock stretches your pussy as you think about how much you love him. How lucky you are to have him.

“You feel so good in me, you fill me so well,” you praise. Joel’s eyes burning into yours as you moan your words out with each push of his hips against you.

His grunts mix with your moans as he kisses you, your whole body begins to shake. His nose bumps against yours as he thrusts harder.

You’re so overwhelmed by his body, by his cock, by his love. You grab his biceps as your orgasm begins to peak, your pussy tightening around his cock. You’ve never had him this way, and you fear you’ll never get enough of it.

“Yes baby,” he grunts, his pace becoming relentless, the sound of his body against yours echoing in his room. “Cum f’me, cum f’me. I love you.”

You gasp “I love you” as your orgasm crescendos, nails digging into his arms, heart beating rapidly against your chest, body quivering underneath Joel as he fucks into your soaked cunt.

“Love you baby," he growls as he pulls out and shoots his cum across your stomach.

You stare up at the sight, his face blissed out after cumming all over you, his mouth slightly agape panting for air, the one curl of his hair you love that always rests against his forehead hanging forward as his big brown eyes stare into yours.

"I love you darling," he smiles dipping his head down to kiss you.

"Love you," you say against his lips.

Whatever you did to deserve Joel Miller’s love, whatever brought him to you, whether it’s a rock or fate in the apocalypse, whatever caused this love between the two of you, it’s like a myth.

Later that night, you fall asleep next to Joel in his bed, the last words you hear as you drift off to sleep is “I love you” whispered against your neck.

A/N: See you next Monday!

Tag list: @orcasoul, @dvmbazzsworld, @glitterymanboy

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