#i live Only on green line and dont rly have to change lines much

[ursoself-satisfying]

Friends Will Be Friends

they’re so cute ::””))) it's hard to find good gifs that fit this mood in particular lol rip

Roger centric (unrequited), officially John x Reader, sfw

A/N: based on a request!!! first angst piece yikes,,, this was supposed to be fluffy but appearently I cant do fluffy n now its angsty so thats fun,,, kind of a sequel to Thank God It’s Christmas, except now its new years yeet but u rly dont need to read anything beforehand this is an be a stand alone like all my fics theyre inherently connected in the universe in my head but not meant to be read in any order 

Warnings: none rly, language ofc, some emotional Rog,,,,, Brian n Fred r like mom n dad for a sec,, unrequited love n angst ;;((((

linking my playlist for my last fic cus it works here too!!! listen here ;;;)))

“Well, I don’t know, really, when we got here I was dragged off by some girls congratulating me,” you took a long sip of the pink champagne, bubbles rising as you threw your head back to finish it before continuing, “I didn’t even know them, actually.” After the drink, this being your- Well, you couldn’t remember but you’d had quite a few and you were starting to feel it. You inhibitions began to escape you, slowly buzzing out your ears like flies. Your senses were still decently sharp but everything was emitting a soft haze. You shook your head and looked at the man beside you with a snort. Roger laughed a bit as you said this, looking down at his bunching pants and smoothing them out then taking a drink of his own still full glass of the same drink. The party behind you was muted through the glass you sat beyond. When you turned to your friend, you could see his reflection in the window, over the bare backs of various guests pressed against the surface. Blinding lights of every color were magnified and you turned away from them after a moment, keeping Roger in your peripheral vision. It was odd but nice that he would sit with you like this. He was a party man yet here he was overlooking the streets and the sky from the chilly balcony with you after rescuing you from a rather unseemly conversation with some giddy female attendants in matching schoolgirl uniforms that barely covered their asses. It occurred to you Roger approached the group with ulterior motivates but in the end he left with you and that warmed you in the bite of the winter outside.

His eyes were caught on you for a moment like knit on velcro and he had to pull himself away as you held out your hand and admired the heavy stone shining on your left ring finger. Anyone could tell it was new to you with the way you fidgeted, spinning around your digits and sliding it up and down whenever you spoke. “It’s kind of funny, in a way,” you started, turning your hand so the metal band would reflect the bright lights from the party behind you, “that so many people found out so quickly and are having such- they’re all being so-” lips flattened into a thin line, you searched for a proper word to describe the situation you were in.

When you couldn’t seem to find an adequate adjective, your friend offered his help. “Jealous? Neurotic? Insufferable?” Roger leaned towards you, scooting closer on the wrought iron bench, one eyebrow raised and a goofy grin. You leaned towards him as well and with a roll of your eyes, hit his arm playfully and shook your head.

Was he wrong though? You blinked and laughed at him, “Be nice!” you scolded, to which the drummer responded with an innocent raise of his open palm and an exaggerated frown. “They’re all excited for me and, don’t get me wrong, I’m excited, too- I’m beyond!” You shrugged your shoulders a bit unsurely, “but- Oh, I don’t know.”

Your gaze was cast down and you sat in silence for a moment, your environment sinking into you. The sights and smells became clear in your pause, filling your nostrils with the traveling scents of burnt sugar and wet soil. Licking your lips before beginning again, you kept up an act, refusing to show any doubts that had seeded themselves in the pit of your stomach. It was easy for you to talk about your love for John, as you truly did love him with all your heart, mind, and soul. Even though you were scared of the change and uncertainty of what this future might bring, you were sure he would comfort you. So you spoke of him to fill in the empty air where you thought your enthusiasm should be, truth in every word but the conversation lacked substance. “He’s wonderful. He’s everything and I couldn’t live without him.” Roger didn’t look at you, or at least you thought he didn’t. It was like he was looking past you like you were there but he could see something more as you continued.

Roger watched you intently when you went silent. He didn’t speak. It looked as though you needed some quiet, or as much quiet as one could get at a trademark Freddie Mercury party. You seemed deep in thought and you looked beautiful in it. Slightly slouching and shivering now and again, you stared aimlessly ahead of you. Fireworks boomed overhead but they didn’t seem to shake you. The only stillness in a mile radius existed around in you right then.

Looking out over the moonlit garden of the mansion, glowing blue and green in the cold night, layers of snow draping the bushes like thick wool blankets and sparkling like the stars that shone brightly above, Roger sighed. It was a gorgeous view, the fireworks over the scene reflecting off all the fresh white flakes gathering in the yard, creating an effect akin to what he imagined people leaving on the Titanic saw. The woman beside him kept up her chatter, going on so sweetly about how in love with her future husband she was and he could practically feel the admiration on his cold exposed skin like lashes batting against him. The hairs on his arm rose when he thought about it, her lashes on his skin, long and soft and accompanied by something else entirely. His unhelpful imagination warped her loving words into whimpers and moans he wished he could hear every night, but every thought was partnered with weighted guilt and he shook them from his mind.

Her words still found their way to his ears like bluebirds in the spring settling on a freshly painted windowsill. “It’s a lot of attention, and I don’t mind the attention, you know that, but he does and I worry about him.” Though she makes jokes, her tone is laced with concern that sends a pang to Roger’s heart.

“You really love him?” He started but interrupted himself, catching himself before he got into a conversation he wasn’t sure he could handle hearing in his over-emotional, half drunken state. “That’s a stupid question, isn’t it?” He looked to you with a smile, though the difficulty of the action was seeping through his teeth like a syrup. With his elbows supporting him as he leaned on his knees, he finished his sparkling drink and chuckled softly. He had inched closer still and now the two of you were touching at the hip. Closeness wasn’t uncommon or uncomfortable given the proximity the band often existed in. You were included in that as often as you’d been with the band in these places, the backstage dressing rooms or clubs and trailers.

The man’s breath hitched when he felt a soft feathery object fall upon his shoulder. It was your head leaning on him, hair nuzzling into the crook of his neck. God, he couldn’t fucking stand it. He held still, still as the marble images around the edge of their view, not wanting you to move, so desperately not wanting to disturb you. He wished- He wished so many things were acceptable to do right then, to do to you, to tell you- “So, uh, where do you think your boyfriend’s gone off to now?”

The words fell out like a cough, rough and unwanted in his throat. He could never grow to hate the man you were to marry. In fact, he probably loved him nearly as much as you did, though in a different way, of course, but it hurt him to see you with someone else, anyone else. It hurt more knowing this feeling had only grown the more you were together and that the only reason you two were ever together was that you were with John. Without John, he never would have met you, but because of John, he would never get to experience you in any way he fantasized. Of course, you didn’t have a monopoly on his mind, it would be unfair of him to claim that as he had other women, other lovers, and girlfriends for long periods of time. You, though, you were always there, both physically and just as a thought in the back of his head.

You interrupted his spacing out when you moved your head off him. He suddenly ached for the contact, both for the warmth and the connection it brought to him. The worst part was the departure of your scents, the soft exotic fruits of your shampoo washed off the pads of his jacket when you sat up to speak. You turned to look up at the pink and orange sparkling fireworks erupting overhead, echoing through the empty vastness of the spacious snow covered green. The snow absorbed the reverb, though, making the ordeal slightly less startling. Roger’s round, sunken eyes were on you as your own eyes traced the path of the falling ashes, still glowing as they rained from above. The sparks landed softly on the ground at your feet and in the light hair of your current companion. He watched as bits put out in your own tousled waves, crowning you with a dirty halo like an angel bringing forth the chaos of a clean slate.

Your growing smile sent another jolt to through the musician’s vessels to his heart. “I imagine he’s probably been given a few too many drinks at this point and has danced himself to the point of passing out and is asleep on a futon somewhere.” The laugh that followed was like music to his ears, like a symphony of love and a bittersweet taste of an unattainable treasure. “It’s exactly what I expected him to do- It’s what we planned actually,” you laughed again, “but I’m just not there with him while he’s doing it.”

Your breathy chuckle died out and you wrapped your arms around yourself with a shiver, the winter around you finally finding it’s way beneath your festive but not protective clothing choices. To be fair, you hadn’t known nor expected to be spending the whole of the New Year’s party outside and open to the forces of nature. Roger nodded as you spoke, still not looking at you. The weight of entering the new year with the unending potential, i.e. expectation, of marriage made you anxiously already and your friend acting so strangely right beside you only made you feel worse. It was a happy holiday, though, for clean starts and letting go and you weren’t about to burden him with these thoughts of yours. He sat back and turned to you slowly, placing a delicate hand on your knee. His soft lips opened to speak when a familiar voice bled through the glass, loud enough to reach over the resounding music still playing, which meant it could only be the host himself.

“Alright, you wonderful people! Midnight is almost upon us so grab yourself a partner! We don’t want to be entering the new year alone, do we?” A crowd roared and booed in response and they all clamored to find someone to hold as they made the journey into January 1st. The two of you looked back at the commotion, then at each other. The space between you was pregnant with things unspoken and uncivil, the child of want and need and lack of better options. Lust and longing brewed on Roger’s end and confusion on yours. Whatever he had wanted to say seemed to slip his mind as your eyes met and for a moment he just looked at you in awe.

There went his heart again, fiddling with his emotions in ways it shouldn’t, hurting as he turned away from you. He checked the time on his watch and it was only minutes until the strike of midnight. He had two choices here and neither was going to absolve him of all his unhappiness, but one had more appeal than the other. Fuck, he thought, was he really this awful of a person? Removing his lingering hand from the woman’s leg, which he was so thankful you so kindly didn’t mention, he stood and looked back at you. Your attention turned to him in his movement and you looked up at him, eyes glimmering in the light of the flashing night sky. He’d imagined looking down at you like this many times, perhaps in a bit of a different situation, but often when he was alone, on tour, in the shower. Here you were, though, tipsy and clearly preoccupied, plagued by second thoughts on your commitment, he assumed, alone with him and you were beautiful. Glowing like the garden you gazed out at, brighter than the moon over the snow and the sprinkling sparkles of celebratory fireworks above your heads. Time was not his friend or it would have allowed him to meet you before his bandmate did. He supposed, though, with great melancholy disdain, that one couldn't change fate and he had determined it must have been fate between you and John. The two of you were perfect. His options at that moment were to give into himself or to not fight fate and he chose-

“C’mon, then, love, you heard the man. It’s almost midnight and you should be spending these first and last minutes with the love of your life. Well,” he winked, “the other love of your life.” His hand was extended to you and you took it graciously, standing up with hurried blinks, the booze you drank earlier rushing to your head. You caught yourself on him as your feet failed to hold you up straight. His arms wrapped around you as you collided with his chest. He swore under his breath, knowing this was God’s punishment for all the tantrums he’d had. His body was warm on your and you hummed at the exchange of heat, killing him a bit more. Roger could barely move, desperately not wanting to let you go but knowing he had to. He pushed you back up and held you so you stood before him. Your deep breath woke you up, the sharp night air fressing in your hot, alcohol coated lungs. You could barely hold your head up to look him in the eye.

The percussionist could see the sudden wave of extremely inconvenient tiredness roll over you and he prepared himself for the contact he craved, knowing it was temporary and for the good of his friends. “Let’s find your hubby-to-be, huh? Get that New Year’s kiss.” He said, scooped you under one arm to guide you into the maze of people that was the party. Upon entering, the man holding you did his best to keep you close, for your safety partially for his own satisfaction. To you, everything began blending together. You simply felt exhausted and you suspected it to be some physical manifestation of emotional fatigue after all the circles you ran around yourself pondering the unnecessary worries of marriage. Fingers that weren’t your dug into your side and you had to catch your breath everytime you felt palms press against your form and embrace you in order to guide you through the mass of excitable horny couples preparing for the bell to toll.

“Roger, what’re you doing, darling?” Fred’s voice came from behind and Roger jumped.

“Fuck, Fred!”

“Roger,” the host said again, unfazed by his reaction and moving to face the pair, “what are you doing?” His tone was more pointed this time and he crossed his arms, brows furrowed at the sight of his arms around the engaged woman. His fingers tapped against his arm and he blocked you from going any further. Your eyes were half open and vision growing blurry but you could make out Fred’s voice anywhere. You were still awake but you were,  in the nicest terms, out of it.

Roger scoffed and rolled his eyes, attempting to push past the singer, lowering his voice to speak into his ear as he passed, “It’s not like that, Fred, I’m finding her John.” Fred lowered his brow still and watch the couple shove through, passing him and heading to the cushioned seats in the center of the room. Fred shook his head, a cocktail of emotions raining over his features. Sympathy, pity, and disapproval all showed through his knowing glance back as he walked away.

The man holding you shook off the accusatory interaction with his bandmate and, reaching the cluster of chairs, spotted the poor bassist slumped against a wall. His fluffy hair was flat against the plaster wall behind him, leaning his head back and looking absolutely unfazed by anything happening around him. Frankly, Roger wasn’t even sure he was awake, eyes barely slits open. Then all the shit hit all the fans all at once, relative to Roger’s priorities.

“One more minute!” Someone yelled, and the bodies around him suddenly starting reacting, moving and jumping as excitement filled the air along with the odors of spilled beer and bodily sweat. Cursing, her gripped your slightly more awake form and shuffled towards where your lover was.

Now more awake than even before your drinks, jostled by the sound immersing you, you pulled back from the blonde holding you. Roger, losing your heat against him, turned back and spoke to you in the form a confused expression, arms raised as a question of why you disconnected. “Be my kiss,” you said, just loud enough for him to hear. You hadn't seen your other half, half awake at the end of the room. The time was ticking down and you were ready to give into booze filled bad ideas instead of overthinking this just as you had everything else tonight. “I don’t even know where John is,” you threw your hands up as you took a step towards Roger, who couldn’t take his eyes off you, “and it’s just you, Rog, he wouldn’t mind.” A smile graced your face with a small laugh, aiming to wash away the awkwardness of the suggestion, though it was meant to be innocent.

Or was it? Roger shuddered as another crack spread through his heart. Truly, this must have been a cruel joke. Kiss you? No, you only suggested it because you saw him as someone non-threatening and there would be no consequences. You saw him as someone you weren’t attracted to, he thought. True or not, that interpretation of your words hurt him, he hurt himself in thinking it. He wanted this so badly, but you and John were not even 20 ft from one another and neither of you saw each other. Maybe fate- No, he thought again, this wasn’t his place and it pained him to turn you down.

Without a word to you, the drummer turned and waved his hand in the air, calling your lover’s name. “John! JOHN!” Your hand was slipped into his in the process and together you made it to wherever it was Roger had seen the quiet man. Your face had lit up upon hearing John’s name and you eagerly followed your guide.

John was pulled from the deep recess of his mind as he stood entranced by the ceiling tiles, assuming you had found friends to party with and he hadn't wanted to intrude. His name was being called by an unmistakenly high pitched voice and he knit his brows, bouncing off the surface behind him to search the bobbing heads of the crowd counting down. A sweatband clad wrist waved excitedly at him and, what do you know, attached to that hand was a certain short-tempered drummer leading behind him-

“[Y/N]!” John called after you. The second he caught you in his sights, it was tunnel vision and he ran in your direction. Roger led you out of the densest mass and gave you a swift friendly swat on the backside as encourage you to meet your fiance. You squeaked, both at the swat and the sight of your lover. When he reached you, he completely engulfed you and you were left with nothing to know besides him. He was everything to do and every anxiety you had was gone at that moment, disappeared in a poof of smoke. Your arms were wrapped tightly around his neck, your face in his hair, smelling the drinks on him and loving every second of it. His large hands spread to shield the small of your back and hold you as close to him as possible.

The countdown began and the hundred of voices throughout the house chanted in unison, “Ten! Nine! Eight!”

John pulled away enough to look at your face and his own was distressed, “I’m sorry I didn’t find you earlier, I assumed you were having a good time elsewhere-”

“I’m always having a better time when I’m with you and it’s fine!” You laughed sympathetically, yelling over the loud countdown, “I got lost in the evening- In everything that was going on, and I-”

“I’m sorry!” He said, smiling weakly. He was so sweet and soft in the colorful lights melting over him.

“Four! Three! Two!”

“Shut up and kiss me-” And your lips collided with his. The clock struck midnight and it was a new year. The cheers around you, throughout the house, were earsplitting and no doubt the neighbors would have complaints, but no one cared. At that moment, everything was wiped clean. There was nothing but new opportunities and potential ahead of them and you finally came to terms with that. It helped to have your future husband caressing you and kissing you with such a passion you thought your lips would go numb. Nothing could have been better than being there in his embrace, you thought, and you mentally thanked Roger for dealing with you, distracting you, and helping you get to this point.

From behind you, Roger looked on with a smile, but as you two remained connected well past 12:01 AM January 1st, he left the scene. He tried to remember he had a woman, albeit one in a difficult relationship with him, and that he shouldn’t be having those thoughts about you at all. There were so many reasons why you were such a contradiction, so right yet so wrong, and it all made him crazier for you. He stepped back out onto the quieter space of the balcony where he’d been with you before. The cold felt like something he deserved. Not being able to stand to watch you exchange hot, open-mouthed kisses with someone else, though he’d never had one from you, was a ridiculous reason to leave his dear friend’s party, he thought. It didn’t stop him from stepping out, though.

The party inside died down as people passed out or left and the sun rose early that morning. Roger watched it, dark bags beneath his eyes a sign of his state. He remained outside, at some point having been given a blanket by a drunken guest immediately before they puked and passed out in said puke. The blanket was clean, thank God, and it was the only thing allowing him to stay where he was so long. The sunrise made him think of you, how bright you were. The birds that rose with the daylight reminded him of the harmony of your voice and the warmth he felt made him think of your body against his in any way possible What it year it was already, he thought, losing himself in inappropriate images of you. It was January 1st and Roger Meddows Taylor had started the year without a kiss and with an aching pain in his chest instead.

BONUS:

Upon finding himself the only one awake so early in the morning and having nothing to do, the lead guitarist instinctively began picking up. Streamers and bodies littered the floor among the confetti, sparkles, the leftover stick of shattered and spilled sugary drinks surrounded by a dangerous array of broken glass that shone with a misleading glimmer of beauty in the midmorning light. The trails of colorful debris had led him to the sliding glass doors of the balcony that open and closed with a low muffled click. Outside, though, was a sight the tall man hadn’t expected to see. His drummer, small and angry, was sound asleep on the bench coddled in a well-loved blanket. Head thrown back and mouth open, drool sliding down his cheek, he looked like a child and somewhere the standing man’s paternal instincts kicked in. Brian sat down beside the snoring blonde and put his arm around him. He was cold to the touch, the thin cover clearly not being enough to trap the heat to keep him comfortable.

His long languid fingers played upon his bandmate’s shoulder until it stirred him from his slumber. He jolted awake with a fearful, high pitched string of swears, frantically looking around until he saw the person beside him then proceeded to swat away any contact that had been made between the two of them. Brian laughed heartily and jumped a bit at the tired man’s reaction. “Fuck are you doing, mate?” Roger said, adjusting his posture and attempting to compose himself. He gingerly pulled the blanket tighter around him and shivered, now realizing how cold he was, as the new sun did very little to warm his aching body.

Looking on with worry in his eyes, though amusement ran through his face, Brian sucked on his teeth as he contemplated what would be the best curse of action in this delicate situation. “Fred told me he saw you with-”

“Oh, don’t start.” A disgusted Roger scoffed and turned towards his friend. Though he would never admit to the emotion behind his voice, the rings of hurt around his eyes made it clear something painful came from his heart.

Brian sat back a little, the cold of the metal bench sneaking through his coat and stinging his back. He understood the space Roger occupied, having once been there himself and it all seemed to work out wonderfully, but this, he admitted,  was a bit more complicated. He wasn’t sure if he should say anything, as his friend sniffled and wiped at his nose discreetly. He couldn’t hide his quivering lip, though.

Though he’d pushed him away before. Brian went again to wrap his arm around the drummer, tightly this time so he couldn't be removed, squeezing and rocking him back and forth as a method of comfort. Roger choked back a sob and his eyes wet against his will. He kept face, though, and remained still, staring out upon the bright melting snow of the growing green garden that reminded of so much of her. A rattled inhale preceded a raspy confession, “I love h-”

“You love John,” Brian interrupted, pretending not to hear what the shorted man was about to say, knowing if he let it out he would regret it and he wouldn’t let his friend make that mistake. “He’s one of your best friends and you love him, hm?” Sitting beside him, the curly mop of long dark hairs towered over his companion’s messy blonde wisps. He looked down at him with a stretched smile, but the other avoided making eye contact. “You love,” Brian sighed, “that he has found someone who makes him so happy. Sometimes they mess up, but don’t we all?” Knowing to raise his brows as he spoke, the guitar player gave his childish friend one last squeeze on the arm then rose and looked out over the greenery below with him. “Don’t h-” He trailed off for a moment, then pushed his eyeline down, turning halfway to the still sitting musician. His hand held his chin in thought before he continued, “Don’t make any mistakes you’ll regret.” The response was thought out and he sends the percussionist a message of sympathy and understanding in his lopsided grin and squinted eyes. With a nod, he exited the balcony, leaving one last pat on Roger’s shoulder.

Roger took a moment to consider the ominous advice of his friend. He thought of all people to tell him something nice, it would have been Brian, for whom a situation much like his own actually ended well. He was disappointed in what he’d said. He did love John, like a little brother. Aren’t brothers just awful, though? The chilly air dried out his tongue as he breathed open-mouthed, nose blocked with clear snot that he would deny was ever there. The tears he couldn’t stop though. One by one, silent streaks cleared their way down the sides of his face from his soft blue eyes. “Quite the predicament,” he said softly to himself, biting back any unattractive noises that dared to climb up his throat. He let out a final conclusion in a pained smile and quiet voice, “Fuck.”

#queen #bohemian rhapsody #borhap #bohrhap #she has a voice!!! #new blog #john deacon #roger taylor #joe mazzello #brian may #film #ben hardy #fanfic #gwilym lee #freddie mercury #reader insert #mine #joe mazzello x reader #requests are open #deaky #queen x reader #ben hardy x reader #freddy mercury #rami malek #john deacon x reader #requested #requests #roger taylor x reader #angst wow #new years

[heybinnie]

it's rockekeke!! hannah from SG (if you frogot hnng) how have you been!! i've been hella busy with life so i'm not updated to the fandom and all but i hope ASTRO is doing well!! and i hope you are doing well to!! i just realised they have a comeback called "blue flame" and it's tmr lmao. have they won any awards :O any dramas they are participating in? also, ASTRO is the group face for KFresh zone in sg. i saw the ad while taking red line HAHAH

of course i rmb you!!!! ive been wondering how things have been going for u too and i hope everything’s okay!! im hanging in there i think hehe ive got finals next week and after 3 dec im Free 🤩🤩🤩 HOWS THAT JC LYFE TREATING U ...

yes the comeback!!!!! im excitessss tbh i only got to properly catch up on astro literally like two days ago or smth so idk quite a few things myself, but they’d won they First Award back in jan for all night, and theyre acting in a drama called soul plate right now!! AND TF IS FRESH ZONE I AINT EVER HEARD OF THAT

#of course it had to be red line 😭😭😭😭 #i live Only on green line and dont rly have to change lines much #asks #ANYWAY i rly hope youve been doing well!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[solidburnreturned]

by popular demand, here is my oc chatter regarding stuff like relationships n random character traits. its rly long oops but i divided it by character at least lmao,, these are all things that i think id also wanna use if i ever use these characters as humans (which i def will at some point honestly)

- i thinkkkk i want toad and pike to date. toad would come across pike in their lagoon one day while hes wandering around on another wonked exploration and pike is like hey lol :B with their pointy teeth and long ass hair and toad is like :0 he just sits and talks with pike for hours and comes by a few times a week to hang out with them. they fall in LOVE

- fred and lani are def gonna date too. two butches who use he/him pronouns fuck yeah? they have a powerful relationship. mega BDE. power couple. not a lot of pda but alone together theyre both very loving and tender, its a vulnerability thing for both of them. like lani is very cool and can be either stoic or borderline obnoxious while fred is punkish. fred is very head over heels for lani tho 

- mardi n berg.....complicated....i gotta figure out how they actually end up together. berg is a jogger and mardi is a piercer/tattoo artist so that doesnt....make them line up very much in that department. ill think about it more and figure something out. itll probably have something to do with berg’s nose stripes and eye rings

- also side note on mardi......i want his backstory to include a grey period set off by his brother being eaten when they were both young at the troll tree. like he becomes angry and depressed, sorta like branch, his tattoos that he gives himself the only color on his body, until he learns to let go and his colors come back (high key this was inspired by 21 savage, mardi’s voice claim, and the line in his new song A Lot “my brother lost his life and it turned me to a beast”). ill develop this idea further but i just wanted to get it written down

- bismuth.......unsure. they had a crush on pepper and kept trying to ask her out until she came out to them as a lesbian, then they were like :’) but theyre ride or die theyre not gonna be an ass to her because they cant date her. they just care a lot about her. its like icarly

- gazpacho and jupiter CUTE two small trans trolls in That Love. i need to develop them more but. theyre just cute 

- talia is still a little too new for me to develop her......but im thinkin about it...

- kinda same with ernie and olive. they kinda mostly just exist as cute babby characters right now? if anything olive is a trouble maker and ernie is a chatterbox

- clem and thursday also fuckin cute as hell......clem was a nervous wreck asking thursday out but theyve been together like ever since, which is more than a few years. they have a rly cute gentle lovey dovey relationship. thursday is usually hanging around up on her gf’s shoulder giving her kisses on the cheek

- bea and crystal.......adorabl relationship......crystal is another character thats kinda nervous but bea is so chill n confident is helps calm her down. theyre both trans and love the hell out of each other. rly slow n steady relationship, bea is very patient

- pj and marcus!!!! dumb mlm rep relationship. pj is so so gay for marcus he can barely comprehend it. its a dumb ego boost for marcus but hes also very in love with pj, he just expresses it in a weird cocky way idk marcus is a nerd. i need to make more content for them i think about these two way more than it seems

- dwight!! he has a boat. he lives on the boat.....ive thought about maybe pairing him with toad and pike. deciding on his voice claim has been the most difficult thing ever

- kass and current HELL yeah buff gf and tol gf......they spar with swords and wrestle for fun and hang out at the beach a lot. kass fuckin loves the gem on current’s back. i gotta make more content for them 

- celia......i wanna do more with celia. friends with berg probs theyre both sporty. shes just a sweet giant troll who loves mushrooms. i gotta pair her with someone whose palette goes nicely with her pastels 

- carrot and harriet are literally cricket and tilly from big city greens just older. yeehaw siblings. havent thought about relationship stuff with harriet yet.....i think she also needs ANOTHER redesign her colors are just too heavy still. maybe if i can make her colors compliment celia’s that could work as a pairing? hm hm.....carrot tho is dating ford’s oc rye theyre gentle country gays

- rainer. hm. i dont think theyre rly the dating type......theyre just chill with being them. they just wanna swim and be funny

- hammond and andromeda are probs two of my least developed characters.....hammond still needs a redesign. he might be cute to pair with walter, theyre around the same age. andromeda tho i have no idea. she might be a nice pairing with eve? if i ever feel like pairing her with someone...who knows. eve is very carefree and might find andromeda’s energy too intense

- radish i wanna make more content for!! i rly like her a lot....i think shes another troll who isnt interested in dating. shes very focused on being a chef instead. loves her friends a lot!

- mack and pepper 2gether 4ever obvs......they have a relationship that gets richer with age for sure

- im just gonna ramble about mack. i thinkkkkkkk i wanna make her half latina? columbian specifically. she doesnt quite read as white and i didnt make her with the intention of making her white. anyway i love mack a whole lot and should really develop her backstory more. its not rly as like...””tragic”” or whatever as pepper’s i know that but she def has layers. i wanna give her whole family more depth. she has a very complicated relationship with her own feelings and motivations that i need to think about more fully. my powerful femme tho i lov her

- mack’s parents, robin and champagne, i need to like....think about them more. they have kinda a comedic relationship thats sorta inspired by roger rabbit and jessica rabbit. robin is a very caring, gentle troll who’s very smart and cares a lot about his nursing responsibilities in the village. champagne is very relaxed and the “voice of reason” character of the family. she loves a good party and has her party planning down to a science. both are very successful power parents. kickass family

- i already talked about topaz and marney in a separate post but i still love them both so much. big wesbiabs

- pepper....pebber. im gonna talk about her the most obviously gfhjdkrs i wanna talk about her mental health i feel like i think about it a lot but i never write about it explicitly? this is gonna be long oops hgjfksd she has depression and ptsd stemming from the trauma of her crash...im thinking she also has adhd and thats just something shes always had. her depression rly got heavy during her recovery and right after like...she hated being bed/housebound and felt rly powerless to her situation and just let it eat at her until her personality had actually changed considerably. like extroverted wild child rebel to introverted, soft-spoken sulker. this got better with time but she still is pretty introverted, just turned her moodiness into chill energy. 

- she has bad depression habits like letting dishes, old food, laundry, or just stuff pile up in her room until it gets overwhelming and she spends like two days just manically cleaning; or staying in bed for way longer than she should and messing with her hygiene; or eating way more or way less than she should eat in a day. just stuff thats hard to completely break out of when youre recovering. her color is pretty consistently the dark red but if shes having a particularly rough day she might look a little paler, or like a muddy brick color at her worst. thats kinda rare tho

- her ptsd is the thing she hates the most. for a while it made her feel very weak and she’d beat herself up over being traumatized by the crash which was obviously not helpful to her mental state but she was really all over the place during her bodily recovery. its part of the reason why she started working out, she wanted to reclaim some sort of feeling of strength and power that she felt she’d lost completely. she still gets really frustrated with this feeling of loss but she gets a lot of support from loved ones which has helped her not self-blame so much. her ptsd manifests mostly as nightmares/insomnia, chronic headaches/stomachaches, intrusive thoughts and sometimes flashbacks. the nightmares are what rly get to her, she really doesnt get a lot of good sleep and it can get to the point where she just doesnt want to sleep sometimes and she’ll stay awake until she crashes hard

- her scars used to be a big trigger for her ptsd, which is why she has her bangs covering the one on her face and wears long pants (her knee braces are too bulky for pants and would force her to wear shorts which would force her to expose her scars). she just. really really hates them. this is something she struggles with for a majority of her life

- once she and mack start going steady with their dating and start consistently sleeping in the same bed, pepper starts to sleep better. she still has nightmares that wake her up at least weekly, but having mack there to comfort her (whether she wakes mack up accidentally or if mack is already awake) helps a TON with getting her back to sleep soundly. it also just helps her sleep in general to have that comforting, loving presence in her bed snuggled up to her ;w; mack is a big help in general with pepper’s mental health, pushing pepper to make better, healthier choices and get out in the village more and have fun. mack for sure does not “”cure”” pepper of anything but shes a very positive light in pepper’s life that helps her pull thru tough times!

- i love all my goofy trolls so much. its so fun to just chill and blab about them to relax between working on big projects ;o; ty if u cared enough to read this whole thing ur so rad

#writing about my hooligan troll ocs is so relaxing #like im not overly invested its just something fun to think about and thats just very nice #txt #oc #oc rambles #ill tag it as that so i dont lose this #trolls #long post

[apocalypto12related]

Do all of them!

1: is there a boy/girl in your life?

Ye! Sammy! @deziac

2: think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?

Um... My family, probably, and no.

3: what do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”

Kitty! I love kitties!

4: what’s something you really want right now?

an apartment. on a less serious side, um, glasses???

5: are you afraid of falling in love?

Nope! I already have and since we’re poly im sure i will again owo

6: do you like the beach?

so/so. depends on my mood.

7: have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?

um... a pull out sofa, does that count? i have a hard time sleeping unless i can fully lie down.

8: what’s the background on your cell?

my old phone was tony my new phone is space. not sure what it’ll be soon. >w>;; considering i need to redownload all the stuff i got off tumblr. :’( i lost all my snapchat stuff, but i moved all of izaya to my computer so that’s fine.

9: name the last four beds you were sat on?

what??? O_o; um... a homeless shelter’s bed and other than that they were all my own??? (not counting the “bed” made of sheets at the one place.)

10: do you like your phone?

i just got a new one!! uwu It has 32GB with it’s own internal storage and I have a 32GB sd card. nwn;; So I have a lot of space~! plus it has a fingerprint sensor and im in love with unlocking it like that owo

11: honestly, are things going the way you planned?

prolly not, but when do they?

12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?

sammy! bc we both got new phhones!

13: would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler?

i heard poodles have bad temperaments!! idk about rottweilers!! whichever one is nicer??/

14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?

emotional!! physical heals!! short time span for pain! emotional might not go away!

15: would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?

DONt mmake me chosoelk??! i love both!!! i lovemy fluffy butts and i went to the met in new york!!! it was so cool!!! swords!! armor!! egypt!! aahhhh!!! i cant choose!!

16: are you tired?

im always tired!!!

17: how long have you known your 1st phone contact?

um... well it’s sammy

so uh, ten years in march owo (technically december was the first time we met!! but we count it as march since that’s when he started talking rly)

18: are they a relative?

no!!

19: would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?

it depends on if they changed their personality!! if not then no!! i mean i did get back with sammy but yknow we just count that as a break since we did actually get back together lmao

20: when did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?

this morning!! she is at work so she’s not too talkative rn!

21: if you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?

we’re fine with what we’re at!! i don’t need to marry her to make it ‘official’!! we’ve lasted almost 9 years and through some big hardships!! both of us unmedicated and dealing with new medication changes, so i think we’re fine!!

22: would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

of course!! :P

23: how many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?

two!! my blue sylveon bracelet (i love sylveon, i would wear umbreon but i think i packed it!!!) and my pride rainbow bracelet! i took them off when we were looking for a shelter bc i was scared we’d get denied if they saw obvious gay signs :(

24: is there a certain quote you live by?

not directly!! something along the lines of that there is no set path in life you have to choose which ways you want to twist and turn and they’ll lead you onto new and bigger things.

25: what’s on your mind?

music! stuff for my phone! i have a lot of stuff i need to add to eeet!! it’s only a day oolllddd.

26: do you have any tattoos?

yes! it’s for my kitty who passed away! Her name was luna. I’m sure i’ve posted a picture somewhere.

27: what is your favorite color?

#00C5FF

28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips?

prolly tonight. owo

29: who are you texting?

Sammy owo

30: think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?

probably?? lol what.

31: have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?

YES ACTUALLY D: idk if it happened any other time, but when we got into the car accident when I told our one friend we were joking about her coming up and hanging with us all my brain said was ‘You shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have done that.’ and again when we went out to the car and it was pretty heavy snow fall. I was like ‘I shouldn’t go.’ my problem with that one was I didn’t want to go, but I didn’t think ‘we shouldn’t go’. but... what can you do now?

32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?

um. i don’t think i have a super close opposite sex friend. closest would probably be @h0bsyrup

33: do you think anyone has feelings for you?

I’m sure Sammy does. >w> I’m not sure otherwise. My followers don’t tell me that stuff.

34: has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?

Yes omg. Sammy was staring me in the eyes the other day and was like ‘your eyes are pretty’ and i’m like ‘omfg shut up >//

35: say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?

if they’re not dating then she’s gonna punch their lights out, so i don’t have to worry.

36: were you single on valentines day?

November 24th, 2008 is when I started dating Sammy. You tell me.

37: are you friends with the last person you kissed?

... of course?? wtf is with these kiss questions.

38: what do your friends call you?

Kiki :D

39: has anyone upset you in the last week?

lil bit.

40: have you ever cried over a text?

Um... probably. I can’t remember.

41: where’s your last bruise located?

omg... um i guess undermy belly button is the latest bruise??? i have a lot atm from surgery and being motionless for four days!!

42: what is it from?

Sammy actually like harshly pushed on that area. like when you go to land somewhere with your full weight then you go ‘oh fuck’ yeah.

43: last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?

um... recently??? but i guess not as bad as with my mom.

44: who was the last person you were on the phone with?

Sammy owo

45: do you have a favourite pair of shoes?

Nah.

46: do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?

No.my hair style is like 99% bun.

47: would you ever go bald if it was the style?

i dont follow trends i set them.

48: do you make supper for your family?

not recently but i would for sammy and i usually

49: does your bedroom have a door?

i don’t have a “bedroom” atm e.e

50: top 3 web-pages?

tambo.c0m (tumblr), archiveofourown.org (ao3), youtube.com (the three i use the most anyway)

51: do you know anyone who hates shopping?

Sammy. xD at least food shopping.

52: does anything on your body hurt?

Abdomen. (:

53: are goodbyes hard for you?

it depends. if it’s unnecessary then prolly. if they’ve fucked me over idc. (i.e. my family trying to replace my mom’s abusiveness, fuck them.)

54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?

prolly water owo

55: how is your hair?

it’s feeling fine, thank you for asking!

56: what do you usually do first in the morning?

it depends! if it’s my “morning” i wake up and usually bathroom.

57: do you think two people can last forever?

sure but it takes work. it’s not gonna be perfect 24/7 without communication or compromise.

58: think back to january 2007, were you single?

ye. omfg why would you give me nightmares. that’s when i started the rping side of myspce and met that douche wesley. his lying ass made me start self harming. fuck him.

59: green or purple grapes?

i don’t eat grapes .w.;;

60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug?

sometime in the future! prolly sammy!

61: do you wish you were somewhere else right now?

in an apartment. >w> or at the pompeii exhibit!!!

62: when will be the next time you text someone?

possibly today

63: where will you be 5 hours from now?

lying in bed. :D

64: what were you doing at 8 this morning.

struggling to be alive. (eating chocolate chip muffins)

65: this time last year, can you remember who you liked?

oh god. w8 no. i didn’t like anyone yet. that started like october or shit. ugh my ex. he became an ass. (aside from sammy obvs)

66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?

sammy!!

67: did you kiss or hug anyone today?

um... i don’t think so. i think we were both too tired and stressed. we didn’t get into bed until like 1 and the shelter has us be out of beds by 8:30 x3x;

68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

um... ‘i should go back to sleep’ after waking up a third time and distracting myself with the phone

69: have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?

yeah,but at least i tried.

70: how many windows are open on your computer?

it’s not *my* computer, so it doesn’t count! ;D (8 but im downloading music stfu)

71: how many fingers do you have?

i have 10. my one pinky counts as a half finger sometimes though. i broke it and bc i didnt have insurance i never went to a doctor to get it fully take care of so it healed up all wrong.

72: what is your ringtone?

default at the moment!

73: how old will you be in 5 months?

oh fuck i’ll be 24. man if you asked me that back in june i’d be like ‘still 23 (;’ but no. my bday is december

74: where is your mum right now?

She passed away. :/

75: why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?

I realize that as much as I wanted to believe it was love, it never fully blossomed into that until I was with Sammy. I don’t think I’ve truly ever gotten to love anyone else, but that’s okay.

76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?

of course owo sammy and i are hella gay don’t u know.

77: are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?

i believe so owo we just don’t talk as much bc im a lazy sack of shit.

78: do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?

fuck. i think i had a minor crush on some dude who also liked green day but never fuckin talked to me so i never bothered. that might’ve also technically been when i started liking wesley. does billie joe from green day count?

79: is there anyone you know with the name mike?

personally? uh.... i’m not totally sure o-o; fuck me man.

80: have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?

probably wait yes. sammy. spooning is our fave position.

81: how many people have you liked in the past three months?

e.e no one that wasn’t a celebrity. 

82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?

no bc shelter e.e

83: will you talk to the person you like tonight?

:P i talk to them everyday.

84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?

i wouldn’t get drunk! i wouldn’t scream at ppl! that’s rude! ppl usually can’t even hear you when you yell at the window! we hear ‘whoosh’ with your voice in the middle’

85: if your bf/gf was into drugs would you care?

i would be concerned since she’s said she doesn’t like them!!

86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?

um... oh! a conversation started and a lil girl asked if we were in a certain theatre and I said ‘no we were in theatre blah’ so I asked what they went and saw. She said “Wonder Woman” “hey we just came out of that, too!” :P

87: who was your last received call from?

.3.; sammy

88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?

i-i’m torn??? i needm oney but poor butter-san... ;____;

89: what is something you wish you had more of?

money. clothes maybe

90: have you ever trusted someone too much?

yeah. lmao.

91: do you sleep with your window open?

i usually do! esp in the winter/summer! need air and love cold!

92: do you get along with girls?

ye!

93: are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?

no. owo

94: does sex mean love?

no! sex is something that can bring someone closer, but it is not necessary for a relationship! 

95: you’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?

>3>;;; again, no.

96: have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?

owo; indirectly. i shared a drink with someone who had one. xD

97: did you sleep alone this week?

not this week! :D last week. ;~; at the hospital.

98: everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?

yes. >3>

99: do you believe in love at first sight?

no!!! that’s not love!! you might end up loving them but you can’t love someone unless you know them!! :c otherwise it’ll lead to some bad decisions!! D:

100: who was the last person that you pinky promise?

OwO Sammy I think.

[porphyrophiliac]

i dare u to answer every single question

o   h(well here we go)

1.Who was the last person you held hands with?my ex

2. Are you outgoing or shy?a bit of both?? like, it completely depends on the environment; i’ve been in the same music class for 2 years and i only spoke to the person who sat next to me for the entirety of that year for the first time today, but i was on a residential at the national film school with 64 other people and i sought out and had a full conversation with each and every one of them

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?my boyfriend!!

4. Are you easy to get along with?i hope so? i think people get along with me if they’re respectful, bc if they aren’t i don’t particularly try to get along with them

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?i feel like max would yeah fdsahjfbasd

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?who the fuck even knows, i just go with the current gfdbhjsgd

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?i think so c:

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?my boyfriend max fggfdgkfdhsngfndkghjs

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?uhhh, it depends on who with? and whether or not it’s personal experience, bc i can talk about it as a concept but my own experiences are reserved for people i’m in relationships with and extremely close friends

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?my boyfriend hgfhdg (look i am Not that sociable)

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?“i love you too, max!” (can u tell that i lov my bf)

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?What THe Fuck Is A Song Who Even Music What the F

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?yES

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?my bf is a miracle

15. What good thing happened this summer?i got into a relationship last summer! with my bf! who i love!

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?no.

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?i mean, like, probably

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?i do not

19. Do you like bubble baths?dude who doesn’t

20. Do you like your neighbors?what the fuck is a neighbour

21. What are you bad habits?existing

22. Where would you like to travel?canada, to see my bf dasfbjhskfdagsh

23. Do you have trust issues?yea

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?talking to my bf, or maybe sleeping

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?the part that’s, uh. the bit that’s like, covered in skin? all of it? yeah, all of it

26. What do you do when you wake up?think about my bf and then go back to sleep dfshjbak

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?i wouldn’t mind being a bit paler??

28. Who are you most comfortable around?my bf dfbhkjasfhas

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?nah, i don’t think so

30. Do you ever want to get married?i think so!

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?nah dfhbjsakf

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?what the fuck is a celebrity

33. Spell your name with your chin.swam

34. Do you play sports? What sports?WHAT THE FUCK IS A SPORT

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?dont do this to me

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?i have only told like, two people i ever liked that i did

37. What do you say during awkward silences?nothing

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?uhh, he’s about 5′3″, shaped like a friend, has a cute canadian accent & short hair, a Real Soft Boy, likes cartoons and makes great art and is v kissable. not that u could ever find a guy that perfect in the real world oh wait i dID HE’S MY BOYFRIEND AND I LOVE HIM

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?if it sells fizzy drinks and chocolate, i’m satisfied

40. What do you want to do after high school?sleep

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?absolutely not. or, like, i think people deserve a second chance, but that doesn’t mean you personally have to give it to them. they can find it somewhere else

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?that im tired, usually

43. Do you smile at strangers?if they’re pretty sometimes

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?trip to canada

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?my alarm

46. What are you paranoid about?everything

47. Have you ever been high?almost

48. Have you ever been drunk?yea

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?i don’t think so?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?mint green

51. Ever wished you were someone else?all the time

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?id like to have boobs

53. Favourite makeup brand?uhhhhhhhhhhh

54. Favourite store?uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

55. Favourite blog?@maxjo​

56. Favourite colour?pink!

57. Favourite food? pasta!

58. Last thing you ate?a croissant, its the only thing i ate today fdbhasjkfbdasfha

59. First thing you ate this morning?a croissant, its still the only thing i ate today

60. Ever won a competition? For what?being the Worst fshbkadnlsat i was one of 12 cinematographers under 19 from across the UK chosen for a specialist residential at the national film school, does that count??

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?nope

62. Been arrested? For what?nope

63. Ever been in love? yep!

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?nope

65. Are you hungry right now?always

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?my tumblr friends are my real friends and i love all of them

67. Facebook or Twitter?facebook

68. Twitter or Tumblr?tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?nah

70. Names of your bestfriends? max (obvs), fearghal, sarah, takeshi, dovydas

71. Craving something? What?love and affection frm my bf dfabhsjk

72. What colour are your towels?purple!

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?four!

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?i have a teddy named max dfbhkajdnkf (hes a soft boi)

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?A Lot

75. Favourite animal?hedgehogs

76. What colour is your underwear?my pyjama bottoms are blue, i’m not wearing underwear currently bc of that

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?chocolate, no hesitation

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?either chocolate or mint chocolate :00

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?light grey! it has pokemon on it

80. What colour pants?blue

81. Favourite tv show?uhhhhhhhhhhh

82. Favourite movie?uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (im a film student i know too many)

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?haven’t seen either

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?haven’t seen either

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?haven’t seen it

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?bruce!

87. First person you talked to today?i have no idea

88. Last person you talked to today?my boyfriend fdsajbhkf

89. Name a person you hate?this one asshole from my school who i won’t name here

90. Name a person you love?max dfhaskjbfsfnasd

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?me

92. In a fight with someone?me

93. How many sweatpants do you have?none :00

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?at least 11

95. Last movie you watched?Moon

96. Favourite actress?i don’t rly have one fbfjhkgsd

97. Favourite actor?i don’t really have one gdfhdfkbjfssfdghkdjs

98. Do you tan a lot?a little

99. Have any pets?i have a cat :000

100. How are you feeling?tired gdhgdfk

101. Do you type fast?yea

102. Do you regret anything from your past?yea

103. Can you spell well?yeas

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?yea

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?no

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?maybe??

107. Have you ever been on a horse?no

108. What should you be doing?sleeping fgsdhbkjFSD

109. Is something irritating you right now?me

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?MAX

111. Do you have trust issues?see question 23

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?uhhhhh???? who knows, i cry a lot gfgfhkdjsnjglsdf

113. What was your childhood nickname?I Dont Wanna Get Into That

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?yea :00

115. Do you play the Wii?i used to??

116. Are you listening to music right now?nah

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?nah

118. Do you like Chinese food?not rly gfsdjkhfg

119. Favourite book?The Book of Lost Things, by john connolly

120. Are you afraid of the dark?yes fdashbkjfasdf

121. Are you mean?if people are mean to me, yeah

122. Is cheating ever okay?absolutely not

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?nope fbhasdjkfadsfas

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?yes, i’m certain that it happens all the time

125. Do you believe in true love?i think so c:

126. Are you currently bored?nope fdsjabhfkdsf

127. What makes you happy?my bf fhadskbjsad

128. Would you change your name?i already have once, but if i found something i liked more maybe??

129. What your zodiac sign?aries

130. Do you like subway?nah

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?reject them but stay friends

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?still my bf

133. Favourite lyrics right now?If there’s a line I’ll cross it,No lesson will I learn;Even if I’m standing on itNo bridge that I won’t burn

134. Can you count to one million?i didn’t get a D in maths for nothing

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?for 17 years i tried to convince people i was a guy

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?CLOSED, WHY THE FUCK WOUDL YOU HAVE THEAM OPNE JOH MYG OD

137. How tall are you?6′1″

138. Curly or Straight hair?curly

139. Brunette or Blonde?brunette

140. Summer or Winter?summer

141. Night or Day?night

142. Favourite month?july

143. Are you a vegetarian?nah

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?milk

145. Tea or Coffee?coffe dfhbksjafads

146. Was today a good day?i guess?

147. Mars or Snickers?mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?’coffe burns’

149. Do you believe in ghosts?who even knows

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line‘mattered. I had all these plans about getting in and reprogramming’

[raitrolling]

charon is my favorite, can we get some deets about him?

omg im glad but i also gotta question ur taste in taste in trolls cuz charon is legitimately the worse lmao

but anYWAY if ur just looking for simple facts, check out his toyhou.se profile, but otherwise cuz i didnt know what to write deets-wise i ended up getting carried away textwalling the entire history of charon’s character so enjoy?? i guess????

charon was my first troll who i made way back in late 2010, sometime after i caught up with the comic (which iirc was the make her pay flash). at first i was like ‘lol fantrolls are a dumb idea why would you make characters if alternia no longer exists in the comic’, but then i discovered the trollslum board on mspaf and the types of really creative trolls people had come up with and now 6 years later im still stuck in fantroll hell LMAO. but charon didnt rly have much of a concept back then apart from doing the thing im sure a good 70% of people making their first fantroll did and choosing the lime green colour thats supposed to be in between sollux and nepeta, as well as wanting him to be some creepy dude who loves blood and fighting because i was still in my edgy phase back then rifp

this pic here was the oldest one i could find of him, i lost a lot of my 2010 arts when my old external harddrive corrupted, and the oekaki i used to draw him on no longer exists so i cant grab anything from there either. i cry looking at the horrid anatomy omg

so then i started rping him on mspaf (which was the first time i rly rped, apart from randomly jumping into other peoples rps on other forums when i was 10 cuz i didnt know wtf it was but i wanted to be cool and write characters too lmao) and he just kinda developed from there i guess?? since he came from a friendless background he ended up getting really attached and protective of the friends and quads he ended up making, which ended up being taken up to 11 and turning into his obsessive tendencies he has now (though i ended up retconning all his past relationships because at the state hes at now, he would never be able to move on from losing so many people and id be stuck with Yet Another Ball Of Angst OC)

the story about his lusus has been changed a couple times too, originally kitedad was just some big angry bird who was attacked by another troll so charon was seeking revenge, but then retcons happened. somewhere down the line i was like ‘yknow charon’s p full on when it comes to trying to help his friends to the point where hed definitely try to hurt them so he could keep them safe, that mustve come from somewhere’ and now we have the awful abusive/codependent mess that exists today

i think a lot of his development came from the way i kept reinterpreting his behaviour too. ive mentioned on this blog a couple times That Weird Black Butler Cosplayer I Almost Dated Back In High School, who, while im sure he meant well, said and did some real creepy shit like turning up to my house unannounced as he found out where i lived cuz we took the same bus home and had memorised the route, as well as turning up uninvited to parties (dressed as fuckign sebastian. i wish i was joking. even my 2011 ultra weeb ass thought that was embarrassing) i was going to because there was gonna be alcohol there and he thought i needed ‘protection’, and also texting me this incredibly detailed dream he had of saving me from bullies and whatnot and that just made me go HOLD ON THIS BEING PROTECTIVE OF SOMEONE THING IS ACTUALLY REALLY WEIRD so i wanted to channel that kind of creepiness into charon. also his guilt trippy tendencies and making everyone’s problems about him is the same shit people have pulled on me before so lmao.

tho that being said, ive never really intended for charon to be 100% irredeemable?? he’s really only ever been intentionally malicious to those who have hurt him or his friends, so he’s more... incredibly misguided to the most extreme degree. he knows what behaviours get what he wants, but doesn’t understand that those behaviours are harmful to others, and he’s hopelessly loyal and protective, but these traits are coloured by the fact he’s got a poor sense of boundaries and doesn’t recognise when he’s going too far. he’s an interesting character for me to write, but finding that exact balance has always been difficult and i still dont know if ive got him pinned down properly yet. i always get happy when i post something related to him and i get messages from people who are just ‘holy shit charon’, it makes me feel like ive done a good job at capturing his character lmao

he kinda came full circle in a sense, from horrible edgy disgusting creep to somewhat of a nice guy with the occasional weirdness to legitimate disgusting creep who happens to also be a nice guy?? idk unlike a lot of my trolls who have gone through a lot of development charon is one of the few who still has a lot of his core concepts, just refined greatly

#charon acerbi #IM SORRY IF THIS WASNT THE TYPE OF DEETS U WERE LOOKING FOR I JUST really love talking about my characters like thiso mg #Anonymous #asks

[carriefisherscokenail]

GUESS WHO HAS TO ANSWER ALL THOSE QUESTIONS TOO

eat my ass! 

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?my girlfriend

2. Are you outgoing or shy?depends on the sitch 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?im seeing sierra in like 2 hours so her 4. Are you easy to get along with?i think i’m alright5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?i think so6. What kind of people are you attracted to?the nice kind7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?i think so 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?colbert my dad who is drunk in hawaii right now :////9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?no all i do is make jokes abt sex im 1210. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?who even knows11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?it says i cant wait to see you either!!!!12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?ooooooooooooo1) hot knifer by peach pit2) alrighty aphrodite by peach pit 3) storms by fleetwood mac4) california dreamin’ by the mamas and the papas5) one by birdtalker 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?i luv it14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?nope not really15. What good thing happened this summer?this whole summer was really good but being in wa was probs my favorite part16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?duh17. Do you think there is life on other planets?aliens r REAL18. Do you still talk to your first crush?nope19. Do you like bubble baths?i love all baths20. Do you like your neighbors?not really, i like the people who live two doors down though21. What are you bad habits?smoking and biting my lip22. Where would you like to travel?everywhere?!?!?!23. Do you have trust issues?i think a little bit24. Favorite part of your daily routine?sleeping25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?the whole thing26. What do you do when you wake up?lay in bed, get dressed, do my makeup, have coffee, leave27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?a little darker would be nice28. Who are you most comfortable around?my best friends29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?nope

30. Do you ever want to get married?i dont know31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?yes finally32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?obama and jesus33. Spell your name with your chin.no34. Do you play sports? What sports?none sports35. Would you rather live without TV or music?ugh probably music but its tough36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?no i don’t think so

37. What do you say during awkward silences?i start screaming 38. Describe your dream girl/guy?a possum39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?i love thrift stores lol 40. What do you want to do after high school?go to university and all that jazz41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?not everyone42. If youre being extremely quiet what does it mean?im probably tired as fuck43. Do you smile at strangers?all the time44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?how abt i kill myself instead

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?my alarm clock46. What are you paranoid about?someone breaking into my house

47. Have you ever been high?yes 48. Have you ever been drunk?only 8 days a week!!!!49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?uhhhh no50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?i don’t rly wear hoodies so i don’t know51. Ever wished you were someone else?oh yes 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?i wish i was taller53. Favourite makeup brand?i don’t rly have one54. Favourite store?i like urban outfitters 55. Favourite blog?dicnysian ;)))))))))))))))56. Favourite colour?yellow!57. Favourite food? hmmmmmmm i like strawberries a lot and any sandwich with cucumbers on it58. Last thing you ate?p(ass)ta

59. First thing you ate this morning?p(ass)ta60. Ever won a competition? For what?uhhhhhhhhhh i don’t think ive ever won anything61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?LMAO I GOT SUSPENDED FOR VAPING IN A TRUCK ON CAMPUS 62. Been arrested? For what?no63. Ever been in love? yes

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?i don’t remember it lol65. Are you hungry right now?mmmmmm yes

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?ive only got like one tumblr friend left (@ emma)67. Facebook or Twitter?facebook68. Twitter or Tumblr?tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?nope70. Names of your bestfriends? squidni and colbert71. Craving something? What?im hongry but idk what for72. What colour are your towels?uhhh all sorts72. How many pillows do you sleep with?a billion73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?nope74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?like i have 1 left i think75. Favourite animal?pups76. What colour is your underwear?black77. Chocolate or Vanilla?vanilla with sprinkles78. Favourite ice cream flavour?vanilla with sprinkles79. What colour shirt are you wearing?purple

80. What colour pants?blue

81. Favourite tv show?ahs is a hell but i also really love parks and rec and grace and frankie is getting up there

82. Favourite movie?but im a cheerleader is my fave but i tonya was RLY good83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?what kind of animal likes mean girls 2 more than mean girls 184. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?mean gorls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?uh idk the mean girl86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?nemo

87. First person you talked to today?squidni or sierra i can’t remmeber88. Last person you talked to today?uh squidni89. Name a person you hate?BROOKLYN LMAO90. Name a person you love?squidni 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?BROOKLYN LMAOOOO92. In a fight with someone?no93. How many sweatpants do you have?like 394. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?like 3

95. Last movie you watched?i tonya!96. Favourite actress?sarah paulson duh97. Favourite actor?i love miles teller98. Do you tan a lot?no never99. Have any pets?two doggios100. How are you feeling?alright101. Do you type fast?ish102. Do you regret anything from your past?like everything i am literally filled with regret103. Can you spell well?i think so104. Do you miss anyone from your past?sure i do105. Ever been to a bonfire party?i think so? ive been to parties with a fire idk if that counts106. Ever broken someone’s heart?who knows 107. Have you ever been on a horse?yes i used to take horseback riding lessons108. What should you be doing?cleaning109. Is something irritating you right now?not particularly110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?oh yes111. Do you have trust issues?you already asked this112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?my math class113. What was your childhood nickname?hoo boy lets not114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?i live in a different country from the one i was born in115. Do you play the Wii?i love the wii

116. Are you listening to music right now?hell yeah!117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?love it118. Do you like Chinese food?LOVE IT119. Favourite book?fried green tomatoes probs120. Are you afraid of the dark?nope121. Are you mean?i dont think so

122. Is cheating ever okay?only on tests bby123. Can you keep white shoes clean?i cant keep black shoes clean124. Do you believe in love at first sight?no

125. Do you believe in true love?hmmm i think so

126. Are you currently bored?yeah127. What makes you happy?getting drunk with my friends128. Would you change your name?in a heartbeat129. What your zodiac sign?Libra130. Do you like subway?yes i never eat there though

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?tell that mans to snap out of it132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?you asked thiss too!133. Favourite lyrics right now?every lyric in storms by fleetwood mac134. Can you count to one million?in theory i could135. Dumbest lie you ever told?when i was little i told someone i was allergic to deers136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?closed137. How tall are you?5′ 2″138. Curly or Straight hair?mines wavy i guess

139. Brunette or Blonde?im a redhead

140. Summer or Winter?summer141. Night or Day?night142. Favourite month?july

143. Are you a vegetarian?lol nope144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?milk chocolate

145. Tea or Coffee?thats tea hunny146. Was today a good day?it was alright so far147. Mars or Snickers?snickers but only if theyre frozen148. What’s your favourite quote?i don’t kno149. Do you believe in ghosts?sort of150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? Hark! I hear the legions coming, (Hear the cries of triumph well,But, proud Caesar, dead I scorn you, Egypt, Anthony, farewell.) 

It’s from a poem in this book i stole from my dad

[tsekooh]

bet yall want yet ANOTHER post with 150 things about yours truly!!! buckle up!!!!!!!

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

hghgkjhjsjkhkjsdghjkgs

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

shy!!! but i can be really outgoing i think? if i have One thing i want to work towards i will do it (college doesnt count shhshhshs)

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

MEG!!! HOLY SHIT I CANT WAIT TO SEE HER

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i.. hope so!! i dont hate anyone 

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

she’d do her best for being in australia

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

do i.......have a type?

all my friends are gay 

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

OF COURSE

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

i only have like 2 o/g friends so i thought abt jace right away

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

only if serious/about real ppl or me

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

meg LOL

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“SARCASM IS KEY i would know im the sarcasm queen”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

eeeehhh

-shelter / porter robinson

-honey / magic man

-find a way  / safetysuit

-collect call / metric

-wildfire / marianas trench

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

ABSOLUTELY

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

YES BC I HAVE ONE RIGHT HERE (picks up meg)

15. What good thing happened this summer?

i saw rina!!!! i love them ;; 

and i met meg after that!!

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

no

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

yes

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

LMAO NO i thought i was straight 

but if we’re talking abt an actual crush then ... rarely?

19. Do you like bubble baths?

yes!!

20. Do you like your neighbors?

dont know them

21. What are you bad habits?

nail biting

22. Where would you like to travel?

australia...

japan w meg ccoUGH

23. Do you have trust issues?

EHHHHHHHH only w ppl i have a reason not to trust?

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

saying good morning to meg

playing games!! drawing!! talking 2 people

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

stomach

26. What do you do when you wake up?

-turn alarm off and brightness down bc its 11pm and fucking blinds me

-skim notifications to make a mental note of who i need 2 reply 2

-unlock phone and say good morning to meg

-shower / eat

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

my skin tone is so awkward....its hard 2 say cause anything doesnt match my hair

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

meg/jace/toby/ren

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

i dont have like...........any real exes LOL

30. Do you ever want to get married?

LMAO I CANT IMAGINE IT only bc if i introduced my wife 2 someone i would literally say “this is my girlfriend- i mean wife”

idc abt marriage like id be down but its not like........Essential 2 a rs

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yep

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

sasuke

33. Spell your name with your chin.

im too lazy to move my head

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

im exercise my stress level in splatoon

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

tv

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

yep

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

nothingsfhdsghjk

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

shes cute and plays video games with me and she loves me and never lets me forget that also her name is meg

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

i love. target. 

40. What do you want to do after high school?

LMAO so ive been out of school for a year so... i did want to go to college bt my mom wont let me so im just gonna move countries

Bye Bich

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

yes..........at least if the harm was done to me.....

unless ur my mom/step dad/dad

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

im dissociating/have nothing 2 say

43. Do you smile at strangers?

i try not to look at ppl 

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

OCEAN

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

meg

46. What are you paranoid about?

(:

47. Have you ever been high?

barely secondhand

48. Have you ever been drunk?

L O L

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

i have no secrets

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

green

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

sometimes but then i think i might be straight and im happy w who i am

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

my disgusting social skills

53. Favourite makeup brand?

eyeliner idc abt brand

54. Favourite store?

amiami .. or target

55. Favourite blog?

softsuke is like my fave mutual theyre p chill 

56. Favourite colour?

PINK

57. Favourite food?

SPAGHETTI or chicken

58. Last thing you ate?

...spaghetti

59. First thing you ate this morning?

.........spaghetti

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

i never win

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

nope tho im surprised

62. Been arrested? For what?

nope!

63. Ever been in love?

yeah... (looks @ meg) (coughs)

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

idr i think it was spin the bottle and i kissed 2 people and i was like 16?

anyway that was my first and last HGJKSGHDUIFJAL

65. Are you hungry right now?

nah

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

all my friends r my real friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

both

69. Are you watching tv right now?

nope

70. Names of your bestfriends?

meg / jace / laura / ren / toby / rina 

71. Craving something? What?

2 be w meg gggghhj

72. What colour are your towels?

orange! 

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

2/3 maybe 4

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

yea

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

AT LEAST 40

75. Favourite animal?

HYENA

76. What colour is your underwear?

pink

dont say anything

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

.........vanilla

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

green jacket

80. What colour pants?

pink plaid pj pants (so rn i look like a fucking disaster)

81. Favourite tv show?

NARUTO

82. Favourite movie?

mmmm... the road to eldorado!

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

mean girls

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

never watched 21js

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

i lov the goth girl and the gay guy i forget names

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

dory

87. First person you talked to today?

meg

88. Last person you talked to today?

meg

89. Name a person you hate?

mom

90. Name a person you love?

meg

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

mom

92. In a fight with someone?

nope

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

idk LOL

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

A LOT

95. Last movie you watched?

UHH.. digimon movie i think?

96. Favourite actress?

emma watson is sooooooooooooooooooooo pretty

97. Favourite actor?

idk (spins a wheel) chris pratt

98. Do you tan a lot?

never

99. Have any pets?

my gma has a bunch of cats

100. How are you feeling?

TIRED I REGRET DOING THIS

101. Do you type fast?

NOT FAST ENOUGH

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

LOL YEAH

103. Can you spell well?

most of the time

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

:3

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i burned a wacom tablet once

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

i hope not

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yes

108. What should you be doing?

uhhh... nothing that i know of

109. Is something irritating you right now?

nope

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

haaehuhsghsu

111. Do you have trust issues?

I ALREADY ANSWERED THIS

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

grandma/sister one of the two

.......DAMN THAT WAS RLY LONG AGO 

113. What was your childhood nickname?

no

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

SPLATOON BABY

116. Are you listening to music right now?

im listening to shiny rn.......from moana......(quiet cough)

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

eh

118. Do you like Chinese food?

ehh

119. Favourite book?

my name is riley, im 19, and i dont know how to fucking read

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

not if i know where i am

121. Are you mean?

i hope not

122. Is cheating ever okay?

stop

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

NO

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

shrugs

125. Do you believe in true love?

YES

126. Are you currently bored?

lil bit

127. What makes you happy?

meg and all my friends i love u all

and games

128. Would you change your name?

legally, yes,

im working on that

129. What your zodiac sign?

capricorn

130. Do you like subway?

not rly but sometimes i crave it for some stupid reason

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

THIS WOULDNT HAPPEN 

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

ALREADY ANSWERED THIS

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

my brain cannot process this question right now

134. Can you count to one million?

no

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

fk if i know

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

CLOSED

137. How tall are you?

5′4′’

138. Curly or Straight hair?

straight

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette

140. Summer or Winter?

winter

141. Night or Day?

night

142. Favourite month?

december

143. Are you a vegetarian?

semi

the only meat i eat is poultry

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

coffee

146. Was today a good day?

so far!! yea

147. Mars or Snickers?

neither

148. What’s your favourite quote?

dont look back youre not going that way

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

lil bit

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

NO FK THAT IM DONE BYE

#quiz thing #if u actually read these holy shit kudos