#i love making u suffer

[cobaltbeam]

Oh no sad rex :(

#i love making u suffer #my drawings #fanart #star wars #star wars fanart #digital drawing #the clone wars #tcw #tcw fanart #captain rex

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[ryllen]

A question I have just recently,

can Sebek handle spicy?

this is what i generally think of fae.

tho i think,

lilia knows spicy spices from his travel.

even tho in dragon form, malleus breathes fire from his mouth, and fire is hot, it might be like the kind of fire that doesn't hurt him in the first place

sebek father might bring spicy spice from human world with him, but since i think of him as a mellow man, he might not be interested in spicy food in the first place

#honestly it makes me wonder all the nrc students ability to handle spiciness & i wish everyone would start putting them into tiers #twst #twisted wonderland #do i tag this as sebek #i do want to know what others think of him #sebek zigvolt #i think the octas would be very bad at it #but floyd probably keeps on challenging it so he gains tolerance over it #riddle would be very bad with it #ace would be pretty good #but deuce would be a little less #or do u think punk him would dare other punks on spicy food #who would shed tears #who would break a sweat #who would eat like it's nothing #who would wail asking the great seven to take them to the after world #i am just wondering bcs of the rabbit sausage roll in deuce hometown #leona who never lift a finger finally break a sweat from spicy food #who knows we even see tears in his eyes while he endures it silently #can vil stay beautiful eating spicy food #despite his tough claim can epel handle spicy #anyhow do u know there's samyang 1/2 spicy now #that's the only one i can eat without suffering like actually enjoying it #idia i feel like he would wrinkle from spicy food #but what if he is some connoisseur of instant noodles so he had been eating spicy ones quite a lot #my brother always love to see me suffer over spiciness

[corpsentry]

breaking the law and outing myself on the internet because i'm showcasing my senior dance thesis on april 28 at 6:30 and 8:30 pm Eastern Standard Time and i want You to see it

we don't have a livestream link yet but we will. in the meantime look at these cool posters and this cool blurb. ok now save the date SEE YOU SOON

#my stuff #my art #these posters went through 14 separate drafts. it was a harrowing and difficult experience #i am Fully Going through it which means 1) physical health is suffering 2) social life also but 3) the thing is going to be so fucking good #sarus is gonna be the best thing ive ever made when we finish it. i Know it #so i want you to see it because it's one of those ambitious stories where everything's bigger than life #and the world is old and young and scary and kind and people live fearlessly and with cowardice #BUT EVERYTHING WILL BE OK. IF YOU JUST KEEP WALKING. this is going to be one of those stories #so many dance blurbs and descriptions are like stupid technical like oh we explored the effect of weighing down our hands and feet #on our Center of Gravity and how it altered the rotational momentum of turns and jumps #or else they're stupid esoteric like oh the wind blew..... and the children wept and all over the world the oceans rose... (global warming) #so i was determined to make this blurb (which is going in the schoolwide email blast) accessible and provocative #and inviting #in a provocative way #im very Locked in rn. im Hyperfocused as fuck. i am not eating as well asi should be but IM TRYING #AND THATS WHAT MATTERS #im inviting all of u bc this is a piece that is going to try and say something and i want everyone ive ever loved to hear it #oghey bye

[faggotgamzee]

Ruler Of My Heart

#i had to make gifs IMMEDIATELY #alien stage #i am GOING CRAZYYYYYY #LUKA IS SUCH A CUNNTTTT I LOVE HOW FERAL SHE WENT #tfw all u want is your girlfriend and instead you have a cheap knock off cunty imitation of her that is enjoying ur suffering

[samijey]

naaaah can we talk about how cute jey is making sure his bf a disappointed sami gets cheered by the crowd so he remembers how loved he is after losing them the match oh i'm a mess 🤧🤧 [x]

#sami zayn #jey uso #samijey #wwe #wweedit #jeysami #stuff i made #they MAKE my bRaiN huRt man #enough of this #enough!!!! #lawsuits for everyone #jey uso wins the award for most in love bitch of the year #bring back the slammy awards and create that category just for him i'm dead serious @tripleh #if u think youre down bad for someone just remember #you'll never come close to whatever affliction jey uso suffers from

[ash-and-starlight]

things i’m going crazay about today: the illustrations in the he who drowned the world illumicrate cover

(artist is glassbearer on ig)

#what’s sending me into hysterics is wANG??? ultimate twinkification 😭😭 #i only recognized from his trademark horrid lettuce gown & faggy peach signaling #the difference between how i imagine/draw him and this is so nebfjsjfkwrkjsj #like to me he’s a tired dude with permanent eye bags and a caffeine addiction that started at age 9 #he’s barely 30 and looks 50 bc every day he wakes up in a torture nexus of his own making #being a straight faggot is hard work but someone has to do it #and is the other guy the third prince??? would make sense tbh but shouldn’t he be in his late teens #ig performative masculinity also ages you #(if i’m wrong and that’s esen PUT SOME BEEF ON MY MAN) #k rant over pushing this aside to tunnelvision on ZHU AND OUYANG #WHY ARE THEY DRAWN LIKE THEY’RE IN THE COVER OF A CAMPY ROMANCE NOVEL I LOVE IT #OUYANG SLUTTED OUT WHILE SUFFERING OH HES GETTING THE 15th CENTURY ART SAINT TREATMENT. AS HE SHOULD #love the benis metaphor of it all too he’s on his knees holding zhu’s sword i know what you are #zhu baby u look gorjus no notes #slay #anyway both /pos and /neg this sure is making me feel shrimp emotions lmfao #the radiant emperor #send post

[katsubie]

also can we talk about the religious commentary. the chastizing of christianity. if hell is forever than heaven must be a lie. the rules are shades of grey if you don’t do as you say. hiding the truth about the fate of sinners while living in a cloud of delusion and lies. i love this show

#hazbin hotel spoilers #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel charlie #charlie morningstar #like ACTUALLY love #AND VAGGIE?? WTF DO U MEAN WE ALL KNEW SHE WAS AN ANGEL I SURE FUCKING DID NOT #“make the wretched suffer just to kill them again” is THE hardest fucking line. are you KIDDING me

[arsenicflame]

i want to see izzy suffer SO badly, i want to see him hurt, put that man through hell

#nothing brings me greater joy in life than to torment my boy #(and then kiss his little head and wrap him in a blanket......) #s2 arc where my boy gets tortured <3 #literally there is nothing better than absolutely destroying him (and then gently nursing him back to health) #fndkdkkd sorry im thinking about him and im going to make it yalls problem <3 #sometimes... i want him to have a soft life only...... and sometimes i still want him to have softness in his life but it to be given after #he has suffered SO MUCH. break him down so he can accept love + kindness..... #nyxtalks #ofmd #izzy hands #israel hands #why yes i am IMMEDIATELY using my tone indicator banners to post dumb shit what did u expect from me <3

[silentgrim]

𝒟𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝒹𝒾𝒶𝓇𝓎, 𝐼 𝓂𝑒𝓉 𝓈𝑜𝓂𝑒𝑜𝓃𝑒 𝓃𝑒𝓌 𝓉𝑜𝒹𝒶𝓎. 𝒯𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝓌𝑒𝓇𝑒… 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓇𝓂𝒾𝓃𝑔.

#helios my boy *sobs* #ts4 #ts4 gameplay #ts4 edit #sim: helios #hi in case ur new this is my sweet ginger boy helios who's also my pfp if u havent noticed #i did a whole gameplay post abt him on my old blog #deactivated b4 finishing his lil story #but anyway here's a quick synopsis #he fell in love with this girl named shahinaz who also happened to be his neighbor #he fell hard and she was unsure how she felt about him either way she gave him a shot and then they hooked up #they started dating then went on vacation together came home and she ghosted him #then she turned up at his doorstep preganante on her third trimester #to make the story short ultimately they got married moved to brindleton bay they had their baby who she named clementine bcs she had- #heli's orange hair which she loved #and then after that there was a storm which she got hit by lightning and passed away #ever since it was incredibly difficult for heli to move on and suffered immensely #he writes everyday in his diary to overcome his grief #thats all for now #will be posting more of him and clem soon ^-^

[b4kuch1n]

hi! birthday. which means it's finally time t

yo what the itch store is fixed up now

damn what? I don't know where this came from. look all the comics I put on g*mr**d a year ago are back here again with all the formatting and typesetting by @fireflysummers as well as the exclusive bonus art wtf who did this. my werewolf comic on here too what the hells!! that one also got re-toned for printing if u want to AND an exclusive cover spread !!! what the fuck!!!!! come see for urself I can't make this shit up

#bakuspecial #comic #itch.io #bakugoods #<- made up a tag for when I sell things that aren't commissions just now #for folks who still remember me talking abt a physical run of these comics: I'm so sorry this year and the last have been brutal #and I live in a well and suffer a curse of international mails never going well. so the logistics became Very complicated #I still think abt it tho! I've prepped up all the assets just bc I thought abt it so much... we picked out a gift print for the orders #And a bonus print for the pack #but I couldn't gather my brain enough to make it happen. yet #it takes a bit of overhead so I gotta build that up. which is. right now talk for after the shit that just happened to me got smoothed out #but I do want it to happen. I've been sitting on this exclusive custom print for like two years now #I really love that drawing its so cute. I still hold that project close to my heart #anyways uhh itch store! happy birthday to me! #last year this time was so rough I didn't even Want to think about my birthday lol #strangely enough with this small little fragmentation grenade we just got I became more motivated to fuck around on my bday lmao #probably out of spite. hammer philosophy #my parents love making a whole thing out of me and the brother's bdays lol so dinner's gonna be something #but for now I can still chill. and prep up stuff. and do my thang #if u look thru the itch store and get something from there thank u so much! I hope the comics treat u well #and now. I make hot drink. have a good day lads! do a little jig for us let's go

[spacedlexi]

when u want to like a character so so bad but theyre a cop so its impossible

#sorry even if theyre hot my first thought will always be 'cop' and it kills all desire #slams head thru wall #vi arcane i want to love u so bad......but i look at u and see COP and its over for me 😐 #and her cop gf 😐😔 #before anybody gets mad at me im just sad 😔 shes great otherwise like she fits my fave types but this wall is insurmountable #she grew up in the SLUMS and they make her an ENFORCER??? die #she was wrongfully imprisoned for like a decade and they make her an enforcer 😐😐😐😐 #after finishing arcane i went to read her lore 😐 #felt so Liberal 😐😔 weh weh both sides bad type beat #girl its not too late please dont be a cop and cait pls leave the force PLEASE i cant defend you like this #anybody else trapped in this torture prison abt her or is it just me please tell me im not alone in this #every time i see her on my dash it pains me so much like physically mentally.... #its ok at least i have my other vi who fights ex military with her gf to avoid becoming soldiers in a pointless war :) blink blink #it speaks #only posting this bc i need to know who else is suffering over this.............. it cant just be me

[mists-reading-nook]

Another world.

Part two,yay!

Slight gore warning!

Gone. His entire livelihood is gone. His home is gone. His family,friends,everyone. Everyone but her. Her safety came above his,she had to stay alive at all costs.

Walking through the familiar forest,weaving through the thick foliage. You travel through this quiet world. Not a sound in the air,not even a gust of wind. Darkness lurks in every corner,under every bush and leaf. Finally,you make it to the place where leaves turn to rock,where grass yields to stone.

Turning around one last time,you look at the slowly closing Sumeru. What happened here? Who wrote that warning?

The dark greens and greys and blues and blacks of the forest transfix you,and you can’t look away,even as your feet move backwards. Your stupor is broken by something soft under your shoe.

It’s another notebook. You pick it up,flipping through it. It’s longer this time.

“We’re out now. We are mostly unscathed,but she’s scared now. I admit I was a bit snippy,trying to get her out,but this is like nothing I’ve ever seen before. Everyone is gone,nothing is familiar. The akedemyia was no help,as expected. But even they’re gone now.

We’re heading to liyue. It’ll be safe as we try to navigate this new problem. At least,that’s what I can hope. I need help,I can hardly do this on my own. “

There’s another page after that,this time it’s messy and scrawled in handwriting worse than in the first note.

“It’s not safe here either. I don’t know how it spread here but it did and we need to run.

Liyue is not safe.

One of them got me,but she’s safe. As long as she’s safe,I can do this. As long as she’s ok,I’m willing to die.

I’ll be ok,there’s no point in panicking.

[There’s a note at the bottom,in big, hastily scribbled letters.]

This is a warning to any and all sumeru survivors.

Liyue is not safe.

I don’t think anywhere is.”

You drop the unsigned book to the floor, hearing wailing coming from below. Carefully,in fear of what you may find,you climb down the broken,rickety wooden figure. What it had once been,you weren’t sure. The underneath of it was the interest anyway.

There’s a man there. Propped up on some rocks,with his eyes glased over. The wailing comes from his wide open mouth. His jaw was hanging from his face by a bone. His eyes are wide,and they look at you. It feels like he’s looking past you,through your clothes and through your skin. He couldn’t see you. Or at the very least,he didn’t know he was seeing you.

The wailing grows louder.

The body of this man,covered in moss and twirling vines,was worn and red. His arms were covered in scratch marks. Blood pooled from them like a waterfall,falling down the arm and onto the floor below.

What was this?

The wailing grows louder.

Who was this? What was their story,why were they sitting like this? What had happened to them..?

The wailing grows louder.

The wailing grows louder.

The wailing grows louder.

Run.

You need to run.

The wailing grows louder.

Your feet take you far. Far away from the man,away from Sumeru. You didn’t know this place,didn’t know where you were going,but your feet take you there anyway.

When you finally make it out of that stone graveyard,when your feet finally land on soft ground,you look up.

Liyue is not safe.

The wailing grows louder.

#accidentally posted this to my dark blog I can’t #sagau #genshin impact #genshin infection au #who’s writing the letters? #if you saw the accidental name drop in part one no u didn’t! #I love making these little guys suffer :3

[sukugo]

This idea is eating my brain. Sukuna being a shameless insatiable freak towards Gojo and an in-denial thirsty freak towards Itadori.

He wants Gojo. He pursues him without relent. Sukuna wants to wreck the man and paint him red all over. He wants to taste his heart and know if he is as sweet as the desserts he gorges himself full with.

Sukuna wants to pry Gojo open and eat him out clean. He wants to climb over him and crawl inside of him. Their bodies becoming one and no one can ever tell where Sukuna start and Gojo ends anymore.

Sukuna desires that more than anything.

But he cannot understand why he sees himself doing it in the body of the brat that once caged him.

Instead of imagining his own four arms bringing Gojo towards his end begging and moaning for mercy he would never receive, Sukuna fancies it to be that of the annoying mouthy fool.

Clumsy hands and eager fingers. Unable to control the strength they possess that they break Gojo in. Cracking bones. Shattering spirits.

Gojo will be quivering. The brat will whimpering. Sukuna will be feasting.

The sweetness of their despair and richness of their blood sit heavy on his tongue. Salty tears spilling from confusion and frustration just makes his mouth water for more.

But what Sukuna craves more from their joining in his fantasy, was the forbidden taste of desire for the impossible and unthinkable - desecration of something sacred and twisting of kindness so profound.

Sukuna wants Gojo through the Brat. It is driving him insane.

SCREAAAAAAAMINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

SHIT THAT'S SOOOOO GOOD OH MY GOD. AND SO SO SO CORRECT

it's a mix of his desire to break yuuji (derogatorily) and break satoru (affectionately) and it mixes up into this absolute mess of feelings for all of them involved and fuuuuuccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

#f.ask #as the kids say nowadays: YOU COOKEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD #fr going insane oh my goddffddddd #like. everytime ive read this since u sent it ive been like 'holy shit' #like gjdfhgksdhkfjrhgfisjioddshiuohdsfuighfksdhjkdfhgsdfdsgs #and it makes so much SENSE. #sukuna wants satoru more than anything. he's the strongest. he wants to break him more than anything. #taste him more than anything. #but at the other hand he DESPISES yuuji. #wants nothing to do with him #wants nothing more than the boy to suffer. and what better way than to make HIM violate the people he loves so much. #his beloved teacher who yuuji loves. with his OWN hands. there is nothing that will crush him more than that #but that comes with facing that he needs to be joined to the boy who has caged him. #the boy that makes his entire being quake in disgust. in absolute disdain. #obsessed anon im OBSESSED #jjk #sukugo #sukugoyuu #anon i love u #bc sukuna HAS such convoluted feelings about yuuji. #vs the clarity of his desire of gojo #love it love it love ittttttttttttttttttttttttttt

[embryoed]

“Gale Hawthorne is a complex character” I say into the mic

The crowd boos, I slink off the stage in shame

“They’re right” says a voice from the audience

I turn, and there in the stands is Suzanne Collins herself

#save my angry oppressed son #he was a victim too he was never the villain he was just annoying sometimes #and by sometimes I mean anything relating to that stupid ass love triangle #ur telling me that if u were in his position u WOULDNT be pissed at the capitol?? #especially after they bombed district 12???? #his anger towards them was JUSTIFIED idc #he was too real #perhaps the realest #so what if he wanted his oppressors to suffer? go ahead king I support you 🙌‼️‼️ #the way that prim’s death wasn’t even his fault #‘b-but he helped make the bomb!!’ SO DID BEETEE AND NOBODY BLAMES HIM!!!! #(mostly bc they refuse to acknowledge his existence but anyways) #he was a victim of the system #product of war #literally HOW does he have more haters than Snow or Coin #ppl who hate on him excessively and refuse to see his character as anything past the love triangle make me wanna claw my eyes out #Gale Hawthorne number one defender #gale hawthorne #the hunger games #thg

[biillys]

billiestevies: the question was “why does billy hate lucas so much?” - i think that really probably answers your question in more of a back-story sense, of why was he the way he was. because - his dad.

dacre @ stranger con, chicago (9th oct 22) bonus:

#!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #dacre: billy was SUFFERING okay billy was TRYING he was hurting he was sensitive he was FRAGILE he was scared he was a KID #and he was doing the BEST he COULD. #because he has a piece of SHIT for a FATHER and no fukcing MOTHER. #except dacre put it like. super eloquently. bless #dacremontgomeryedit #dacre montgomery #billy hargrove #camaro 67 #'torments billy everyday' neil hargrove i am killing u repeatedly every minute of every day #the WAY he says 'That PERSON is his father' like dacre is BEGGING ppl to fucking understand #the way billy is!!!!! is not billy!!!! its his FATHER!!!!! because he was raising with that upbringing!!!!!! #and he had to weather it!!!!! and survive it!!!!! and sometimes enduring is turning yourself into someone that you yourself dont recognise #just to survive!!!!! so that when you make it out the other side!!!!! you can finally grow!!! #and heal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and live!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and to figure out who you are!!!!! without that weight crushing you alive!!!!!!!!! #dacre: billy was sensitive and i tried to show that through my portrayal #all of us crying and screaming and scratching and biting and throwing up: we know this and we love you so much #m #gifs