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mrsbakashi · 1 year

Note

Can we please get one of Kakashi significant other going to the hospital sick while Kakashi goes to work. Than the significant other does testing at the hospital but the results won’t be in till later so Sakura will send the results home with Kakashi so she goes home. Later in the day Sakura drops the paperwork off to Kakashi & says “congrats your going to be a father” and Kakashi has to let his significant other know? If that makes sense! Thank you ❤️

this is so cute! i wanna thank you for requesting this (and trusting me to write it) 💕 because it's holiday season i turned it into a holiday-themed thing, i hope you don't mind!

this was super fun and sweet to write (tho i still don't feel 100% with it).

🎄CHRISTMAS GIFT 💝

words: 3K

a/n: i took inspiration for pregnancy symptoms + reasons from google and my friends (specially one with pos who got pregnant the same way), but i'm sorry for anything (?). also, this is unedited and english is hard.

⚠️ c.w.: afab reader, unplanned pregnancy, pos (polycystic ovary syndrome), christmas, the mention of sex while pregnant.

you flushed the toilet again and got up, opening the faucet and washing your face. the mirror told you you looked like a mess, absolutely horrible. deep dark circles, pale, dry lips, and, besides that, it felt like your body was fighting against itself and apparently it was winning - or losing. you lost count of how many times you threw up in the last couple of days and you were feeling all over the place. such a great way to feel on christmas eve.

kakashi opened the door of the bathroom, worried about you.

"come on, let's go to the hospital." you could tell he was worried, but tried to maintain his voice firm.

"no, i'm ok! i'm just a little dizzy, that's all."

there was no way in hell you would go to the hospital. you hated hospitals! no one has ever received good news in a hospital. best case scenario was "you're not sick" which is not exactly a good new, it didn't change anything. a good new would be "hey, we just discovered you're immune to every disease that has ever existed and you're practically immortal" or something similar. also there was the smell, the freaking white walls white everything. ugh, absolutely not!

"you've been throwing up for four days now, please, y/n."

"mind your fucking business, rokudaime." you told him, pushing him aside to leave the bathroom.

"you're my fucking business."

"how sweet." your voice was filled of sarcasm. you weren't usually this mean, but kakashi sounded like a broken record, insisting you went to the hospital when you clearly didn't want to.

you sat on the bed and closed your eyes, trying to make the world stop spinning. your mind was desperate trying to remember if you'd eaten something that could've caused this. maybe a new virus? either way, your body would get rid of it naturally, how it's supposed to do.

"no, really, go to work. i just need to eat something and lay down a bit." you tried to calm him down.

"you said that yesterday and the day before that, i can't leave you like this, come on."

"kakashi, drop it, i'm not going to the hospital!" he was starting to get on your nerves.

"i'm not asking, i'm informing. you can choose to go wearing what you are now or put something else on. you got 5 minutes."

"touch me and i swear to god i'll make you regret the day you were born!"

"honey, please..."

kakashi kneeled down before you and took your hands in his.

"i can't leave you like this, i haven't been able to focus properly because i'm worried about you, i'm running behind schedule at work. i'm asking you, please, let me take you to the hospital."

you sighed, looking at him. as the hokage, kakashi couldn't skip a day of work, he was responsible for absolutely everything, and he would work the whole day on christmas eve.

"i hate hospitals. i really do."

"i know. but we have to find out what's wrong."

you got up and changed from your pajamas to a loose dress, grabbing your purse on the way.

kakashi practically carried you to the very christmas descorated hospital, but you couldn't blame him, you knew he was worried. that was the only reason you were there, actually. you were sure there was nothing wrong, you could feel it it was only temporary, probably just something you ate, but you were doing this for him, to make him feel at ease.

he only left after putting you in one of the beds, as if you were so weak you couldn't walk or sit. taking one of the hospitals beds was ridiculous, but the place was nearly empty anyway, people seemed to avoid hospitals during the holidays.

the holidays.

you couldn't help but smile at the memory of your first holiday with kakashi, when he asked you to be his girlfriend under a mistletoe, and exactly a year later he proposed. you had had a crush on him for months before he actually made a move, and now there you were, six years later, married and happy. you wondered if he remembered, now that he was all busy with the hokage job. you couldn't blame him if he didn't, he was working late on christmas eve, he had a lot going on... but at least he would be yours tomorrow. all yours.

"hi, y/n!" sakura greeted you.

"hi, sakura."

sakura was wearing a santa hat and there were tiny reindeers and christmas trees on her scrub.

"i heard you're not feeling well today. what's wrong?" she asked, holding a clipboard, ready to write down everything and anything you said.

"it's really nothing, kakashi's just being dramatic..."

"well, you're already here, we can check it out, it's no trouble. so, what are you feeling?"

"well, the main thing is this sickness, my stomach feels so weird i can't eat anything, i just throw up right away."

"hm... what else?"

"well, this is what concerns kakashi the most, but i also feel tired all the time, you know? it's like i ran a marathon, i just want to sleep."

"ok, so basically you're throwing up, feeling nauseous, can't eat and feel super tired?"

"yeah, that's basically it."

"okay, and when was your last period?"

"shit, i have no idea... my cycle is not really regular... i have pos, i take the pill but it doesn't really help with the cycle, sometimes it's 20 days, but sometimes it's like 45, so i don't really pay attention to it. i should, i know, sorry. it also doesn't help that i take the same pill since forever."

"okay... did you take any medication lately?"

"oh, god... nothing special, just the occasional aspirin. but i did have to take antibiotics for my throat a while ago ago, but it was nothing serious."

"okay..." sakura was writing everything down and had a little smile on her face. "question: is the sickness worse in the morning, like right after you wake up?"

"yes! why is that?"

sakura smiled and kept writing down your symptoms.

"so, do you know what's wrong? it's really nothing, right? probably just something i ate?" you asked, hopeful.

"well, in a way, yes." she giggled, but you didn't understand why. "come on, i need to take your blood and run a few tests in order to be 100% sure."

ugh, needles.

your body shivered at the idea, you absolutely hated needles, but what were you going to do? you were at the hospital anyway, might as well do everything. you were sure sakura had a pretty good idea of what was wrong with you, so if she wants you to take a blood test, you will take a blood test... that somehow made you feel quite anxious. if sakura wanted you to take a blood test, and she had an idea of what was going on, then maybe it was not "nothing", or simply something you ate. the idea of it being something serious caused panic to wash over you.

sakura was very skilled, she took your blood quickly, you almost didn't feel a thing and you were so so thankful for that.

"can you tell me what do you think it is?" the panic in your voice was obvious.

"we better wait for the results, but don't worry, it's nothing bad, i promise." she replied, tagging the blood bottles.

you nodded, looking at the perfectly painted white wall. nothing bad... as if something good was an option. in hospitals. haha.

"so, because it's christmas eve we're really short on people and the results may take a while, but you can go home if you want. i know you hate hospitals, it'll only make you anxious staying here... i'll send the results to kakashi."

"really? thank you!"

"yes, just make sure you rest, get some sleep and drink loads of water, ok? and try to eat something. a fruit, a glass of milk, anything is better than nothing, your body needs it." she recommended.

"okay, doc."

sakura smiled and touched your arm.

"and don't worry, everything's okay. i'll ask konohamaru to take you home."

"oh no, don't worry, i'm ok, i can go by myself."

"it's no trouble, he's got nothing better to do. besides, kakashi would kill me if he found out i let you leave alone."

that was true and there was no doubt. kakashi was overprotective - it would be ridiculous if it wasn't somehow sweet.

konohamaru walked you home taking very seriously the mission of taking the hokage's wife home in safety, it was adorable.

as soon as you got home you boiled water to make a cup of tea and tried to keep your mind free of worries, but it was difficult. sakura's questions brought up a fear you were working really hard to ignore, specially because it matched your symptoms, but it couldn't be true, it just couldn't. not with you.

you snuggled up on the couch with your cup of tea and turned on the tv to try and distract your mind.

.・ ✧。.・゜✧・.

kakashi was finishing signing a huge pile of documents when sakura entered the office.

"hi, kakashi sensei!"

"hey, pink hair! i hope you didn't come here to deliver bad news... how's y/n? or did you come to talk about something else?"

"i brought her blood test results."

"is she ok? please, tell me she's ok!"

"she's ok, sensei!" sakura smiled. "she's home, that's why i'm giving the results to you."

kakashi took the envelope from sakura's hands, but didn't open it, instead waited for her to say what was really written in that piece of paper. he was trying to hide the fact that he was anxious and worried, but a bit calmer now that he knew you were home - if you were home it meant you didn't have to stay at the hospital, so it was nothing too serious.

"so?" he asked when sakura didn't speak.

"congrats, sensei, you're going to be a father!"

sakura couldn't hide her excitement, she believed children were a blessing and she was so happy her beloved sensei was going to be a father! being one of his genins she knew he would be an amazing father. kakashi, on the other hand, was frozen, still holding the envelope, not even blinking.

"sensei... are you... ok?"

"she's... pregnant?"

"yes!" sakura confirmed, smiling. "isn't that wonderful?"

"are you sure?!"

"yes! look at the results, she's around five or six weeks in!"

kakashi still seemed really confused, as if sakura had said that the sky is in fact green.

"how is that possible? you're not lying to me, are you?"

"no! see, she takes the pill, but antibiotics cut the effect of the pill, i don't think she was aware of that."

kakashi was so shocked he didn't reply, still trying to process the information, envelope in hands.

"sensei... is everything okay?"

"yes, of course!" he gave her his signature smile, his eyes becoming little crescent moons.

"i have to get back to the hospital... tell y/n i want to talk to her asap, we need to run other tests, start the antenatal check up, see if everything's okay, if she'd like to keep it..."

kakashi nodded, but he didn't seem to have listened to her, so she left and went back to the hospital. it took kakashi a while to fully process the new information, he was caught so off guard. after a few minutes he left the hokage tower telling shizune he had to rush home and not stopping to hear her complain about how late they already were with things.

.・ ✧。.・゜✧・.

"y/n!"

you woke up with a little jump when you heard kakashi call your name, realizing you had fallen asleep on the couch, the empty cup of tea on the floor. at least it didn't break.

"y/n!" kakashi called again.

"in the living room!"

three seconds later kakashi appeared with an envelope and a box in hands, almost running towards you.

"how are you? are you feeling better?" he asked, hands cupping your face, eyes analyzing every millimeter of your skin.

"i'm ok, i'm better. i told you i only needed to eat something. and sleep apparently. i'm better, there's no need to worry. is this the test results?"

"yes."

you reached out to the envelope, but kakashi didn't let you touch it. weird.

"well? can i please see it?" you asked, sarcastically.

kakashi shook his head, then sat by your side.

"i'd like to talk to you first" he said.

"you're acting weird... are the results bad? am i sick? what is it?"

"you're fine."

you raised an eyebrow, not believing him. your heart was beating fast, and you started to feel a little anxious with the idea that something was, in fact, wrong. maybe you really were sick.

"if i'm fine, then why you don't want me to see the results?"

he handed you the box, which you accepted suspiciously. you untied the ribbon and opened it up, seeing a pair of tiny tiny socks inside it. your heart skipped a beat.

"uh... what's this?"

"y/n, you're pregnant."

the words hit you and made the room spin. you dropped the box and time stopped while your mind tried to process the information. that's exactly what had crossed your mind at the hospital, but you were too afraid to even consider it. it might have been seconds or minutes before you looked back to kakashi.

"i'm sorry... what?!"

"you're pregnant." kakashi said the words very carefully, seeing how you received the new.

"no... no, it doesn't make sense. let me see this!"

you finally took the envelope from kakashi's hand and opened it up, taking a quick look at the numbers and then seeing the high number on hcg hormone.

there was probably a question mark tattooed on your face, because you were so confused. it just didn't make sense! you took the pill and, even without the pill the chances of you getting pregnant were lower than average because of pos... at least that's what the doctor said when you you were diagnosed. it didn't add up.

"you see, apparently antibiotics cut the effect of the pill."

antibiotics! of course!

"oh!"

you closed your eyes when it all started to make sense. the sickness, the mood swings, the sleepiness... you touched your stomach unconsciously, the sudden awareness that there was a life evolving there was mindblowing. your eyes burned and you started to blink to contain the tears.

"i'm sorry..." you said with a weak voice, trying to contain the scream in your throat.

the tears fell from your eyes nonetheless and you felt ridiculous. you had one job! and now it was all ruined. kakashi and you never really talked about having kids, but you could tell from the way he talked about his father that he was scared, probably terrified at the idea of traumatizing someone same way his father did. he loved his genins, he really did, and he was some sort of father to them, he'd go to hell and back for them, but that was different. he had already lost so many people, he didn't want to go through the pain of losing a loved one again - you were the only exception, the only one he had let in, the only one who was worth it enough to risk it, but that was it. and it's not like you were dying to be a mother - sure, you loved children and the idea of a mini kakashi running around the house made your heart feel warm, a little package of love, the result of how much you and kakashi loved each other, the chance to make it right, the way your parents hadn't... but to be honest the idea of being responsible for a life scared the shit out of you.

"you're sorry?" kakashi chuckled.

you nodded, the tears never stop falling.

"i'm sorry i was so stupid, i know you don't want to be a father... i'm sorry i don't know what to do!"

it was getting harder to speak and impossible to contain the tears. kakashi pulled you in to his chest and kissed the top of your head.

"honey, we're in this together. it's ok, you're ok."

he kept repeating you were okay, massaging your back while you held on his shirt for dear life and tried to pull yourself together.

finally, a few minutes later, you felt calmer. kakashi pulled your chin up to look at you. you could tell he was smiling under the mask.

"you're right, i didn't want to be a father. past tense. that was before you. you can't imagine how happy i am, how full i feel!"

"really?"

"honey, i love you! nothing could make me happier than starting a family with you!"

the tears came again, but this time it was because you felt incredibly happy and emotional. yes, it felt like you were all over the place.

"oh no, what's wrong?" kakashi asked, wiping away your tears.

your answer was to hold him tight and plant a kiss on his neck, which made him smile.

"so it's safe to say you also want a family with me?"

"of course i do!" you told him.

kakashi ran his fingers through your hair, something he knew made you feel calm and safe while in his arms and you two just stayed there for a while.

finally, when you were almost asleep he asked:

"what do you think it is? a boy or a girl?"

"hm... i think it's a boy. a silver haired boy that looks just like you and will annoy the hell out of me just like you do. i just know you two will be full of shenanigans."

"what if it's a girl? a beautiful lovely girl just like you that will be the center of my world just like you are. too clever for her own good, will always be on your side, even when she knows you're wrong."

you giggled, painting the picture in your head.

"what if we have twins? a boy and a girl." you asked, intertwining your fingers with his.

"then we're lost. completely. they would destroy the house while we'd watch in awe."

"i bet they would destroy the whole village, and no one would dare to stop them because they're the hokage's kids. they'd be little terrorists."

"oh yes, i can already picture them... shit, i'll have to hide my books."

"and the dogs, oh god... the house will be a complete mess 24/7!"

kakashi laughed.

"i can't wait for them to be here, i wanna hold 'em and smell their tiny head..."

"i have to say that the way you're so excited to be a father it's so hot and if i weren't already pregnant i'd ask you to put a baby in me right now."

"shit, i love you" he said, before pulling the mask down and kissing you passionately.

you weren't sure how it happened, but you were suddenly beneath him, your fingers pulling his hair while he kissed your neck. now that you knew you were pregnant you could blame it on the hormones, even though you knew that the truth was that, when it came to your husband, you were insatiable.

"thank you for the greatest christmas gift of my life." he whispered between kisses on your lips.

"the gift is not over yet. pants off, hatake."

kakashi's taglist: @smutteedreams @justmyownreality @nightingaleflow @allyallygator @thetimelesschild @jyotsna-d @rocknrollsoul76 @crimsonxuchiha @hellogecko-blog1

fill this out to be part of my taglist 💕

#kakashi #kakashi x reader #kakashi x y/n #kakashi fanfic #kakashi x you #pregnant reader #morggie writes #mine #i loved writing this!#request #kakashi fluff

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aliusworld · 1 year

Text

AngelHair

Angel Devil x Reader

aliusworld’s songfic event— inspo: MANNEQUIN album (Deco*27)

[Description: “I’m always a loser.”, “I can always quit, I can cool down if I want to.”, & “I wish I could hug you deep down and say it’s insecurity; if only that were love.”]

Warnings: None? Reader has insecurities.

{2238 words}

•••|•••|•••|•••|•••

The sun had just risen up, it was blaring itself into your eyes. You’ve been awake for a few minutes now, staring out through your window. It was annoying, the sun in your eyes, even if you shut them tight all you could see was red.

You try and move your body off the bed, but his arms were wrapped securely around you.

“…Angel? When I said to get comfortable with me, I didn’t mean to get this comfortable…” Was the first thing you said, he only just started sleeping next to you. He was fully covered, by his own will, and so were you! His arms weren’t tight, but at the same time you couldn’t move.

“…”

“Hey! Wake up! I know you aren’t asleep!” You twist your body to face him, we quickly shut his eyes in response, “Aha! I new it! C’mon Angel, let go of you just for a little bit…”

“I can’t. I just got to have you all to myself. I don’t want you to leave…” Angel murmured as he opened his eyes again.

“But the sun in shining in my eyes!!” You whine as you hug Angel, trying your hardest to be persuasive

“Just sleep facing me…” Angel shoved his head into your left shoulder, right i between the bed and your chin.

“And we need to get ready for the day~ We still have a job to do~”

“Stop saying that… can’t you just call off sick for today? I want to spend the rest of the…”

“No can do! Sorry, I used up all my sick days a while ago. You should probably know that by now.” You smile as you play with a couple of loose strands of Angel’s hair.

“…Say that I’m sick.” His voice was muffled as he spoke into your chest, you could feel his breath.

“A devil. Sick? No way they’re gonna believe that. Plus, we’ll both be in deep shit if we’re late again.”

“But I don’t want to move…” Angel rubbed against your body some more

“Fine, you can stay in bed. I’ll make some breakfast and I’ll wake you up when it’s time, alright?” You used the softest voice you could.

“I don’t want you to leave me either”

“You have to choose, my Angel~ Me or the bed?”

“You. Duh.”

“Yeah I thought so, come on. Let’s go~”

“…fine.”

You lift yourself off the bed, Angel was still clinging onto you, he was warm as per usual. You hadn’t noticed until now, but you two barely made any contact together outside from the… not safe for work stuff. His eyes were shut still, he trusts you enough to lead him the right way and to not drop him.

The breakfast you “made” was simple and easy. No need to open the fridge and make yourself and Angel cold. It was just bread covered in whatever else you had laying around. You didn’t toast it either. Simple and easy.

“Wake up, Angel.” You spoke gently as you poke his clothes shoulder. ‘I really want to touch his face.’ You shake it off as he opens his eyes again to see you.

“Are we leaving now?”

“Nope, you aren’t ready. And… We both need to eat” Your hand hovers over the food you ‘made’.

“Let me feed you”

“What.”

“You take good care of me, let me do the same for you.”

Your face turned red as your eyes widened. You turn away to pace yourself and turn back to say “sure.”

The bread was nice, what was even nicer was the look in Angel’s eyes. He looked like he was head over heels for you, if only you could actually touch him. If only he could actually touch you.

The time spent at breakfast was short, but it felt like heaven. With Angel still latched onto you, you make your way back to the bedroom to change into your work attire.

Angel sat down on the bed, watching you undress, you didn’t mind. Honestly, this was the closest thing you two could do to get even more intimate.

You took a few seconds to stare at the imperfections on your body before quickly turning back to put some clothes on. Of course, thoughts crawled through your head again and again. ‘Why does Angel even like me?’ He never gave you an answer because you never asked. Though you wish he would express himself more.

“Alright Angel, your uniform is in the closet go ahead and do it yourself” You smile at him as you put on your work shirt, it’s still unbuttoned but-

“Can I do that?” Angel pointed down at your chest.

“W-What?” Angel took that as a yes and came closer to you, his gloved fingers worked fast to button your shirt, “Angel… what’s up with you today..?”

“Nothing… it was just bothering me.”

‘Yeah, my body would bother me too.’ You didn’t say it though. You smiled at him and kissed the back of his hand, a show of thanks for his actions. He looked like he was about to melt, almost like a cat in a ray of sunshine.

You watch Angel get dressed, spacing out at the same time, you stare at his halo, his wings, his hair, his body… why did he settle for you?

“Are you done staring at me now?”

“Ah- What?” You zone back in, Angel moved in front of you, how did you not notice that?

“You know what I mean.” Angel crawled back on top of you, “I don’t like being away from you.”

“Me neither.” You stand up with Angel still clinging onto your arm, you throw your blazer on and head towards the door.

The weapon in your hand wasn’t unique, but it was special at the same time. It was made by Angel willingly. Not because the higher ups instructed him to do so. You knew how much he hated it but he kept on insisting again and again… Another special feature is that unlike most of the other weapons he creates, it’s a pole arm. It’s almost taller than you! The color wasn’t special, but the rest of it was beautifully made.

It reminded you of Angel whenever you looked at it, and that’s what you were doing for the past minute. Zoning out. Again. Angel was still clung onto you, he wasn’t saying anything, his head was on your shoulder, your thumb was rubbing against the grooves on the weapon. You shift your eyes to look at him, today was uneventful, but at least he’s here with you.

It was paperwork as usual. Filling out about the past devil interactions, Angel was supposed to be doing something as well, but does it even matter anymore? You both aren’t doing anything anyway.

“Angel?” Your voice perks up, you waited for a response from him.

“…” He didn’t say anything. You moved your head to get a good look at him, he was sleeping. Maybe you really should’ve just stayed home today.

The stacks of paper were definitely something, you’ve been staring at them for so long that they just look like gibberish. The black ink was mixing with the white background, your eyes felt droopy, sooner or later your head fell on top of the desk. It made a somewhat loud thud noise, it definitely woke Angel up. His head jolted off your shoulder and he stared at your drowsy form.

“Sorry to wake you up… I’m sorry, everything’s just a mess.”

“Nothings wrong, [name]. It’s fine… I can try to help..?” Angel rested his head next to yours, it felt like you were only a few centimeters apart, you could feel him breathe.

“It started off as such a good day. I just had to ruin it. It’s fine, stay here, do something. I’ll go get coffee or something.” You sigh and get up from the desk, Angel grabbed your hand.

“Let me go with you, please?”

“Haha… Sure.” You smile at him, it was forced from your part but it did the job. Angel got up from the desk, your hand was still in his, it was nice. Almost like you two were at home, but you weren’t.

“Good afternoon. [name], Angel.” Aki interrupted you two, he was also in the break room, alone. At some point, your hand with Angel detaches.

“Good afternoon, Aki” You say, Aki was so much… better than you. He works harder, he has more muscle, he… You shake your head to get the thoughts out, you place your cup down.

“Hi Aki.” Angel hasn’t noticed that he let go of your hand subconsciously, or were you to let go? You don’t remember. You go over to sit down on the couch, you’re so tired.

You tune them out at some point, you don’t know if they’re speaking to each other or not, you’re stuck in your thoughts again.

‘Why did Angel choose you?’ Repeats itself in your brain again and again.

‘Would he have chosen Aki if he were an option? Is he an option? Is Angel going to leave you? Are you going to be alone again?’

You wouldn’t say you were jealous, but it still feels horrible. You feel bad for yourself, but you can’t stop feeling the way you do. Your eyes were clouded with frustration as you leaned against the couch and looked towards the ceiling.

Your thoughts went from Aki to other people, like Makima… Himeno… your ex co-workers… They were so much prettier. So much more dominant and powerful, so much more than you could ever be.

What’s so good about you?

Maybe you should stop hanging around other people for a bit. Being alone with your thoughts? No- being trapped on your own with your thoughts? It would eat you from the inside. But you don’t want to bother anyone else with them.

“[name]? Are you… okay?” It was Angel’s voice. You hadn’t noticed at all, but Aki left the room already. Angel was back clinging onto your arm.

“Oh- yeah, I’m fine. Hey, we did enough work for today. Let’s go home.” Seriously? You didn’t even do a lot, you’re never getting a raise. You grabbed your pole arm from your office before leaving with Angel.

Maybe you’ll ask him tonight… or maybe you’ll just quit this job. It’s fine.

You’re fine.

Home didn’t have the same feeling as it did a few hours before. You felt… worthless. Why do you feel this way? Angel has given you no reason for thinking that way, yet here you are beating yourself up about something that doesn’t exist. But what if it does exist? You haven’t exactly given Angel a reason to stay either. So why?

“[name] you don’t look too good, are you actually okay?” Angel tilted his head to look at you.

“…I don’t know. I’m just…! I have no clue why…” Angry tears fall from your face, you were angry with yourself, why are you doing this to yourself?

Angel’s eyes widen as he sees your state of mind, you haven’t said anything yet but it looks like Angel understood a little bit, “Talk to me, [name]… what’s bothering you? Is it me or-“

“No! It’s not you, why would it be you? I don’t think I would ever be mad at you.” You choke out, through all your hiccups and sobs Angel somehow drags you to the bedroom.

“Then why?”

“I.. I don’t know… it’s- it’s because of me, but at the same time I just…” You couldn’t make eye contact with Angel, you couldn’t even lift your head up from your hands. Angel took your blazer off and threw it neatly to the side.

“Well?”

“Angel… why…?”

“So it is about me.”

“No, I mean… Angel, why do you like me?”

“What?”

“I mean, there’s so many other people out there that are just so much better than me. I don’t understand why you would-“

“Are serious right now?”

“Wh- huh?”

“You’re the only person for me…”

“But why? I just don’t get it… Aki’s so much more… better. So is-“

“Because you’re kind. You’re the only person who’s trusted me enough for anything. You’re the only one that’s willing to spend time with me. You mean the world to me, is there more you want to know?”

“Angel…”

“I think your beautiful too”

“But my body is…”

“I think you’re perfect. And if someone disagrees I’ll kill them.”

“Aha… Angel…” You smile at him, your tears stopped. “Don’t say stuff like that.”

You lay down in his lap, you’re looking straight up at him, he’s looking back.

“I’m sorry for being so insecure and… I’m sorry for blowing up on you. I… I didn’t mean to sound so…”

“No, you deserve to feel things. Seriously.”

You want to kiss him so bad. Show any way of weakness for him to fill the void within you. But you can’t, you know you can’t. If you did actually touch him, he’d only avoid you. Something about… ‘Not wanting to hurt you’. But what do you do if you want him to hurt you?

You kiss the tips of your gloved fingers and place in gently onto his lips, this takes him my surprise.

“That’s for you. Thank you.” You say, you slowly lower your hands from him mouth, “Thank you for sticking with me.”

“…I love you, [name].”

•••|•••|•••|•••|•••

MASTERLIST

Taglist: @bubbles4marina

-Yours truly, 💟

#aliusworld #chainsaw man x reader #csm x reader #chainsawman x reader #angel devil csm #angel devil x reader #chainsaw man x you #angel devil chainsaw man #angel devil x you #angel devil x y/n #I loved writing this!#I was kind of projecting haha #I rlly hope this helps someone with insecurities because I deal with them too #stay healthy!!#aliusworld MANNEQUIN event

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mcdynamite · 1 year

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Hiya! Your writing is fantastic and makes me all warm inside. Could I request 34 from the prompts list? Thank you so much! 💕

Hi!! I know this took me AGES to get around to, but I posted a little blurb for this prompt a couple of days ago! You can find it at the link below!

This was such a lovely prompt to write for and I'm so glad you requested it! I hope you like what I ended up coming up with!

#prompt fill #request #steddie #prompt list #mcdynamite writes #thanks for the ask!#i loved writing this!

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systemadministratorclu · 1 year

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[five word prompt for Sonic]

— “god, you’re just the cutest.”

Ed was gone to work for the day, and Clu was a little tired from some hard work on the Grid. So he'd left his trio of advisors (Tron, Hal, and Tesler) in charge while he went to the Userworld to spend a day relaxing with his adopted baby brother. He arrived in Ed's home office, still dressed in his robes. He had clothes he kept by the laser that he could change into, but he saw no need since he didn't plan on leaving the house. It was raining outside anyway, and it was one of those dreary all-day rains. Still, he smiled as something blue streaked through the hallway and his arms were suddenly full of little blue alien hedgehog hugging him with a big smile.

"Hi Clu!" Sonic was always excited to see his big brother. Of course he preferred going to Clu's place, since he could run around there (Clu had even built him a single, double, and triple loop-de-loop! Best brother ever!). But even if he couldn't run, he still enjoyed any time he got to spend with his brother. Like him, Clu also had to stay hidden, since Clu was also technically an alien. So they were confined to Ed's house.

"There's my little Tron Troubler!" Sonic giggled at one of his nicknames.

"Hey, I'm also a Tes Teaser and Hal Hugger."

"You forgot one."

"No I didn't." Sonic hugged him again, rubbing his soft, fuzzy little face against Clu.

"I'd never forget to be a Clu Cuddler." Clu shook his head with a smile.

"Grid, you're just the cutest." Sonic laughed again as Clu carried him out to the living room. All the curtains were closed, as they usually were so Sonic didn't have to worry about someone seeing him through a window while Ed was gone. Clu dropped onto the couch and flicked on the TV to try and find something to watch. Ed had added a program to the smartTV so it gave more information about shows and movies that would help Clu to know what was okay to watch with a small child. This allowed him to say yes when he flipped to a nature channel where a show about hedgehogs was starting and Sonic squealed in excitement, asking to watch it. He was disappointed that Earth hedgehogs weren't like him, but he still found the show quite interesting, sometimes imitating the hedgehogs on the screen when they rolled into a ball or puffed out their quills.

When that was over, they quickly switched channels, as neither of them was interested in the show about insects that followed. So they flipped around watching various movies and cartoons. It was nowhere near Fathers Day, yet every show seemed to be playing a rerun of its Fathers Day episode. Every character was giving some kind of gift that said 'World's Greatest Dad' or 'Number 1 Dad'. This gave Sonic an idea, and he voiced it over a lunch of pizza rolls (Ed always made sure to have something handy that one could just stick in a microwave, since trying to cook had nearly given the poor program a heart attack). Clu thought it was a wonderful idea, and after lunch, they got supplies from Sonic's room and got to work.

To say Ed's day was horrible was an understatement. Not a moment to himself throughout the workday, AND he had to work with Mackey all day. The rain only worsened his mood. By the time he got home, he wanted to just flop on the bed and cry. But he knew he couldn't, and there were two reasons why. One of them was calling for him now.

"Daddy, come here!" A little voice called excitedly. Ed did his best to put on a happy face for little Sonic's sake as he followed the sound of the hoglet's voice. Putting on that face became much easier when he walked into the living room.

Sonic and Clu were seated together, and it was clear they'd been hard at work, Clu helping with a lot of glue and attaching things to a board (something Clu had probably gone to the Grid to get. Ed had taught him to operate the laser from the Userworld and the Grid in case of emergency. Tron, Tesler, and Hal had also been taught.) Sonic proudly gave a little presentation like he was handing out an Oscar, standing on the coffee table to make up (a little) for his small size.

".....the award goes to.....you!" He proudly held out a plaque almost as big as he was, covered in all kinds of blue and red and gold sparkles and shiny stuff, the design clearly the work of a small child. The words 'Number 1 Dad' were clearly legible (probably written with Clu's help). His little face peeked around it with a huge smile as he held it up.

God, you're just the cutest, Ed thought.

"As does this one." Clu said, holding out his own, much neater (but just as shiny and sparkly) plaque that read 'World's Greatest User'.

Ed hadn't even realized his eyes had watered. He dropped his stuff on the couch, carefully taking each one, looking at it, and placing it carefully to the side so his hands were free. He then proceeded to pull both of his kids in for a hug.

"I love you both so much," he sniffed. He couldn't stop smiling now. This was why he did it. This was why he put up with the crap at work. This was why he put up with Mackey. For these two. Clu, whose life he'd saved from evil, to whom Ed was a hero who had made his greatest wishes and dreams come true (one of those being to have a User who cared about him and loved him), and who had reclaimed the term 'User' and made it so that now Clu associated it with kindness and care and love. And little Sonic, who had been sent to him from another world, who had stolen Ed's heart immediately and continued to do so every time he called Ed 'Daddy' and smiled up at him with those big green eyes or hugged him or snuggled up to him.

He would spend all day every day with Mackey for these two. They were his whole world, his little family, and he couldn't imagine life without them in it.

Later that night, after he had read a story and Clu had sang a song while they tucked Sonic in, and after Clu had returned home, Ed went to bed himself. He smiled at the two plaques that now hung on his wall, right where they would be the first thing he saw when he woke up and the last thing he saw when he went to sleep. Those two awards, he knew, would always mean more to him than anything he could receive from Encom or anywhere else. Hell, he could get a medal from the President, and even that would never be as important to him as being Number 1 Dad and World's Greatest User.

#thanks for the ask!#I loved writing this!

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so-many-ocs · 4 months

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[on the verge of having a complete breakdown] i need to make some kind of list or perhaps sort things into categories

#🌿 misc #idk how to tag this #i just love making lists #and sorting things into categories #pinterest #??#this is part of what motivates me to write i just love making lists of scenes and then sorting them into categories #bangers

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palatial-monstrosity · 15 days

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the self care industry will sell you face masks and teas and whatnot so i'm here to remind you not to forget the most important self care activity which is masturbation

#i love this site where else could i write this

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inkskinned · 9 months

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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?