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kaylorrehabcenter · 3 years

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Rating Every Song on Fearless Based on How Gay it is

Hello friends! I still have a few song analyses in the pipeline (and one on Lover the album) but today in honor of Fearless (Taylor’s Edition) being announced and Love Story being released in a few hours I thought I’d do something fun to celebrate!

And you know what? Fuck my usual disclaimer, I am the word of god here. Try and change my mind about any of these. I dare you. (I kid I kid this isn’t that serious and you’re free to disagree <3)

1. Fearless 15/10

Everything about this song is so fucking gay oh my god. This isn’t a fruit, this is a whole ass edible arrangement. As a small rural town Gay (my hometown has a population of less that 4,000 and where I’m living now has a population of 2,500) this uh. Hits.

“And I don't know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first, fearless”

Y’ALL

The idea of falling in love with someone who makes you less afraid of your homophobic small town…….it’s getting to me.

“My hands shake, I'm not usually this way but/You pull me in and I'm a little more brave/It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really something/It's fearless”

This is making me emotional, I'll be honest. I see so much of my friends and my experience in high school in this song.

This quote I found on genius is from when the album was released on BMR’s website.

“When I wrote ‘Fearless,’ I wasn’t dating anyone. I wasn’t even in the beginning stages of dating anybody. I really was all by myself out on tour and I got this idea for a song about the best first date. I think sometimes when you’re writing love songs, you don’t write them about what you’re going through at the moment, you write about what you wish you had. So, this song is about the best first date I haven’t had yet.”

This just screams baby Tay writing gay folklore to me, about the gay stories she wish she had. Notice how there are no pronouns in this song??? Fruity I’m telling you.

All that to say. I’m crying because the linear note says “I loved you before I met you” and I want to go listen to Long Story Short and cry now.

2. Fifteen 1/10

Objectively pretty straight as she’s singing about her and Abigail’s dating boys in HS. And Taylor got with a senior guy. Good for her I suppose.

Unless he was one of the shitty ones in which case.

“This is life before you know who you're gonna be”

This however, is a cute line and the whole song makes me warm and nostalgic. You can also hear her crying after the line “and Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind” which makes me emo and I’m sure will take on new depth after Abigail’s divorce and hurt me even more.

Other highlights that make me sob include.

“When all you wanted was to be wanted/Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now/Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday/But I realized some bigger dreams of mine”

Bigger dreams of hers indeed :’)

(Also how can you say she’s a gold star lesbian when this song exists. She was obviously dating boys in high school and even if you think she’s a lesbian. Comp het is a hell of a drug kids.)

3. Love Story 8/10

Tried to change the ending indeed.

This is THE Taylor Swift song, and maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but damn I still love it. Written because she wanted to change the ending of Romeo and Juliet (how anyone likes RandJ enough to want to rewrite I have no clue.) and/or because her parents didn’t approve of a guy she was seeing. (according to genius, it would’ve been too early for Joe J so it could possibly be Boys Like Girls frontman, his image did clash with hers and they did release some cute songs together. However if you want my take it’s probably folklore about Emily, take for what you will)

This song has very oft gay vibes with the ‘They don’t approve of our love angle!’ but uses male pronouns so points redacted for that. HOWEVER this is a very early use of ~the male perspective~ in Taylor’s songs and for that it deserves all the love.

“ So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew/So close your eyes/Escape this town for a little while”

More rural town angst!!!

Nothing gets me more than rural town angst.

“Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it's real”

Originally the lyric was “this love is different”. Granted I do not remember the source, i’s just lore implanted into my brain, but make of that what you will.

“"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone/I love you, and that's all I really know/I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress/It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes"”

Marry me Juliet from the male perspective :)

Also worth noting. This is Karlie’s (and Kim K’s lmao) favorite Taylor song which. While basic as hell. Makes this cover sad as hell to this former Kaylor. (thanks @swiftgron-get-married for the tears <3)

Also not to make this about a man AGAIN but the secret message is “Some day I’ll find this” AND SHE DID IM CRYING.

4. Hey Stephen 1/10

The one thing Camilla Cabello and I have in common is loving this song, so I have to live with that for the rest of my life.

This song is very painfully straight.

How can you think this woman is a gold star lesbian.

The only noteworthy thing is that this is one of the few songs she confirms who it’s about. The secret message is “Love and Theft” which is the name of a country music duo who went on to open her Fearless tour. Which, does make me side eye this song a little bit.

Still a cute song.

“Hey Stephen, boy, you might have me believing/I don't always have to be alone”

5. White Horse 1/10

Oh look. It’s track five.

You know maybe this is just me being a bitch but in my ranking of track fives this is. Pretty low. Maybe on the bottom.

Like I don’t have a lot to say about it.

She’s going through it over a guy. He was a cheating dickweazel.

“'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale/I'm gonna find someone someday/Who might actually treat me well”

“Try and catch me now, oh/It's too late/To catch me now”

These lines hit though!!

And she found Joe!! Who treats her well!!!! And she isn’t the princess, she’s the prince who dropped her sword and knocked on her door!!! But this time if they come for them she’s ready!!!

Yes I will make every song about Long Story Short <3

6. You Belong With Me 5/10

Ah yes. The other THE Taylor Swift song.

You know. If I went to a high school with a cheerleading squad. And I had a crush on a cheerleader. I would blast this song. So for that it gets a 5/10. Otherwise. Fairly straight and fairly iconic.

7. Breathe 8/10

Well. We know this one is about a woman. (Emily Poe for those not in the know. Ha. A rhyme!) That alone has an 8/10. And it’s the first time she has a featured artist so bonus points for that!

It was nominated for a Grammy and it fucking lost to Jason Mraz. When’s the last time you thought about Jason Mraz.

I will not have Kaylor feels on a fucking Fearless song but damn is it VERY easy.

“Never a clean break, no one here to save me/You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand”

“It's 2 A.M, feeling like I just lost a friend/Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me”

Also this bridge? Goes off. HIGHLY underrated.

8. Tell Me Why 3/10

You know. Maybe this album isn’t as gay as I once thought.

This song does bop though, not as good as her other angry songs on this album. But I can vibe with this you know. Why are you being an asshole mysterious man.

“You could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day”

This has to be one of baby Tay’s best burns. Damn.

“Why do you have to make me feel small/So you can feel whole inside?/Why do you have to put down my dreams/So you're the only thing on my mind?”

Men ain’t shit kids. However, bonus points for the shade.

9. You’re not Sorry 1/10

Ok, ok. Maybe this was a foolish endeavor.

Because yet again we have a very straight song. A good song. That was on Taylor’s episode of CSI. But oh dear. Very straight. Gets a measly one point. We started this post off so very very gay but damn. We seem to be nearing the end on a very straight note.

10. The Way I Loved You 20/10

Hey Remember what I said about this album being very straight.

WELL THAT WAS A LIE.

Is this a comphet album or am I projecting.

This is one of my favorite baby gay Taylor songs. Her masterful use of pronouns (he is sensible! And so incredible! And all my single friends are jealous! But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, when it was two am and I was cursing your name!) makes the other person she’s singing about completely vague, while we know she isn’t happy with whichever guy she’s dating.

Mayhaps an early reaction to PRomances?

Either way this song is so good, truly an underrated gay gem I mean. Look at it.

“Breaking down and coming undone/It's a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that's the way I loved you”

AND THE BRIDGE. Do all of her gay songs just have kickass bridges?

“He can't see the smile I'm faking/And my heart's not breaking/'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating/Intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now…”

Damn. I’m imaging this with 2020 vocals and fucking ascending.

Also please watch the live performance of it from the Fearless tour. It’s such a damn shame this got cut from the movie and some woman in the front row is wearing a cowboy hat. Everyone is holding up those cameras everyone had to have before smartphones. Taylor is being endearing. It’s a good time.

11. Forever and Always 6/10

Bonus points for the ~drama~ of it all. Added last minute to the album? The iconic throwing of the chair in live performances?? All of it very dramatique and for that we stan.

Still pretty straight.

Also Joe Jonas responded to the song and why do I find his response so damn funny. “It’s part of being a musician, I guess. You write songs about each other.”

This is another song where the idea of Taylor’s grown up vocals on this is………..whew

12. The Best Day 0/10

This gets zero points because it’s about her literal mom.

Still makes me cry.

God bless Andrea Swift indeed

13. Change 13/10

We start the official tracklist with a gay song. We end it with a gay song.

We will ignore that it was originally written for Scott and BMR and instead induct it into the hall of gay pride anthems, as it should be.

“We're getting stronger now, finding things they never found/They might be bigger but we're faster and never scared/You can walk away, say we don't need this/But there's something in your eyes says we can beat this”

“This revolution, the time will come/For us to finally win/And we'll sing hallelujah, we'll sing hallelujah”

The music video is cringe though lol

14. Jump then Fall 10/10

This song is gay because I choose it to be. <3

Like. Picture baby Taylor writing this song and playing it on her guitar to a girl she has a crush on telling her that she’ll protect her and they’ll be safe and in love and happy together. Gah, maybe I’m ~projecting~ but this sweet ass song always gets me and is EASILY in my top five Taylor songs. Super underrated and hecking cute.

“We're on the phone and without a warning/I realize your laugh is the best sound/I have ever heard”

Like. Look at this shit.

“I watch you talk, you didn't notice/I hear the words but all I can think is/We should be together”

Tell me this is about the first time you get a crush on a girl and she’s your best friend and she’s amazing and beautiful and you realize you kinda want to kiss her and you hope she wants to kiss you too.

“I had time to think it oh, over/And all I can say is come closer/Take a deep breath and jump then fall into me”

And she’s the Romeo who's going to protect her!!!!! She’s the knight in shining armor in this song and I love that for her??

“The bottom's gonna drop out from under our feet/I'll catch you, I'll catch you/When people say things that bring you to your knees/I'll catch you/The time is gonna come when you're so mad you could cry/But I'll hold you through the night until you smile”

I won’t divulge into full on analysis here because. This is what this post is about but PLEASE listen to this song more. It’s such a gay little gem.

15. Untouchable 9/10

How does she make a cover sound gay.

It sounds so gay.

“You got to come on, come on, say that we'll be together/Come on, come on, little taste of heaven”

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

16. Forever and Always Piano Version 1/10

This song gets 1/10 because I don’t like it. There. I said it.

17. Come in With the Rain 3/10

I can see why this is a bonus track. It doesn’t hit me as much as the other songs on the album.

But damn if I don’t want to scream sing this one driving down a high way.

18. Superstar 7/10

You can’t tell me this song is about a man. I simply won’t entertain the idea.

You cannot prove to me that this song is about a man. There is not a male pronoun in sight.

>:)

19. The Other Side of the Door 6/10

Is this song about having a fight about being in the closet? Probably not. Will my gay little brain make it about that? Yep!

And that, funky little queer pals, is my gay rating of every Fearless song. Like and subscribe, #t3atmidnight

#long post //#fearless the album #gaylor #what do i tag this for it to show up for peope??#gay rating

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gotatext · 5 years

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by this point im p sure u all know the drill.... i’m nora, 23, she/her, gmt and tonight matthew im going to be greta o’driscoll, a terrible person but a hot one which frankly makes it almost ok. here is her pinterest..... this intro is literally just copied n pasted frm the last time i played her so soz if u’ve read it like 10+ times....

「 diana silvers. cis-female. 」have you seen greta o’driscoll around yet? i hear she decided to be in POTENTAS for their SOPHOMORE year as a CRIMINAL PSYCHOLOGY major. the 20 year old SHEPHERD is known to be tenacious, magnetic, capricious and evasive. ➨ the muse is written by nora, she/her, gmt.

was adopted as an infant. had two foster moms and two older sisters so always surrounded by women. lived in a boarding house, very much like the one in 20th century women, with lodgers coming in and out all the time, mostly artsy young women because her gay moms were both high school teachers trying to set up their own arts collective. one of her moms left when she was 4, n she doesn’t really remember her.

while living with entirely women made her super into catlin moran and the guilty feminist, as a teenager she often let boys walk all over her bc she just craved male attention jst bcos she’d never really experienced it. saw it as something aspirational, like sitting in the back of chad’s second-hand truck while he drove you to macdonalds and offered you and his five friends with identical haircuts weed was the height of being cool to greta, she wanted to be their dream girl, even if it meant compromising her beliefs

was always a really sporty bitch. it started with a junior athletics squad, which turned into athletics and cheer, which then became athletics, cheer and hockey until she basically was doing a different activity every night. she came to see her body as a tool that she could make work for her if she trained it up and this attitude’s always kind of stayed with her that as long as her body is strong she is capable of anything. runs every day.

bubbly bitch but also massive snake. metaphorically and literally, always shedding her skin. loyal to few, ruled by none, out for herself, babey!! every place she goes, she becomes a new character, someone who’s a figment of her imagination, as if each city is repertory theatre and she’s a character actress, so as a result som ppl think she’s called rita, some ppl know her as margot, she just flicks through identities like nobodies business.

left school at 18 n went backpacking around the states making money in the casinos by being a shot girl (yeehaw) and trying to make it as a mysterious 1920s widow with a smoky voice, a dark secret n a heart of gold, looking for love in the big city. all she found was producers and acting agents who’d promise her stardom n actually just fuck her in a motel n then ignore her calls.

TW domestic violence, TW gun, her watershed moment came when she met luke in sioux falls while she was working at a strip club. he was a few years older and had a car, and they kind of went from seeing each other to being that super intense couple who are just necking all the time.

they got engaged like 3 months after they met n rented a flat together, much to her family’s annoyance but she was 19 so there wasn’t much they could do. their relationship was super super intense though, often really heightened and when they fought it could become quite violent, but she’d pass it off as just him being really passionate.

one of their fights got really heated and greta threatened him with the gun he kept in the glove box of his vauxhall corsa, but the safety was off and she accidentally shot him. she pleaded self defence in the trial n cos of the amount of times she’d been hospitalised for various concussions n things like ‘fallling down the stairs’ the police were like yea… pretty watertight evidence that he was a bastard who [chicago voice] had it coming…..

she’s now under witness protection, rehoused in livingstone as a sports-scholarship student, due to the amount of police involvement in the area, it would mean should one of luke’s family members try to track her down, she’d be relatively safe

massive sports fanatic. plays tennis. on the cheer team. was a track superstar in her high school. honestly just that sporty bitch, you’ll see her doing lines at a party at half four and then on your way to your 9am lecture you see her running across the park like a fresh fucking daisy who is this bitch. maybe it’s maybelline, maybe its coke.

massive feminist. low key quite scared of powerful men bcos of her ex. wants to start a female only lesbian commune bc she misses her childhood in a south dakota boarding house and has endless support for women. honestly annoyed that she is attracted to men, would so be 100% gay if it was a choice. cuffs her jeans and can’t drive. is That bisexual. skateboards. wears backwards caps. i hate her

isn’t a foward-planner, however. greta prefers to leave her options open, play the field, live in a spontaneous manners so her study style is mostly cramming a few days before a test, or staying up all night writing an essay on a massive adrenline boost powered by red bull or probably adderall, scribbling (or typing) furiously into the night.

has an addictive personality. seems unable to do anything in a small dose, she has to let it utterly consume her. with sports, she’s fiercely competitive. with alcohol, it’s never a shot, it’s a whole bottle – wine or whiskey – she’ll be table dancing before the night’s up and making out with someone she’ll regret in the morning.

not afraid to go after what she wants !! ambitious academically and romantically thirsty !! she loves the adrenaline of the chase. when someone’s easy to get, she becomes bored. very bisexual and very proud of it. feminist as fuck nd part of a queer representation in the arts group which holds fortnightly meetings to discuss lgbt representation in film, literature, art etc.

old soul in a young person’s body. all the shit that has gone on has kind of aged her. she’s quite cynical about everything now. always smoking smoking smoking. very edie sedgwick in that way. little girls skirts bought for next-to-nothing at the market because she’s skinny enough to get away with it, barely long enough to cover your bum, and then the ugliest baggy sweater you’ve ever seen thrown over it.

likes old things. old books, old music, old houses, it reminds her of happier times like when she wasn’t alive. buys all her music on vinyl and has a gramphone because “The Sound quality is Better” kfdsjj.

super into pop art and andy warhol. puts female friendships above everything but at the same time, would fuck her best friends man

her clothing style is like…. vintage thrift store but make it preppy. berets and cute hats, neck scarves, large fluffy cardigans or like those leathery jackets with big suede fringes on them, mini skirts (very 70s), and knee high socks or boots. quite often she’ll be in sports kit, maybe a cute tennis skirt, n when she’s feeling casual she’ll wear like, a talking heads tshirt with a pair of mom jeans and converse, but otherwise, the library is her catwalk.

aesthetics:

a bubble of pink gum on chapped lips, mom jeans, a beaten up pair of adidas, denim jackets, strawberry laces, knee-highs, chapped lips, peeling sticky plasters, split knuckles, bruises you try to cover with concealer, stick and poke tattoos, hot coffee, sleep caught in your eyes on a lazy afternoon, kissing girls, cigarette smoke shrouding you like a veil, alien conspiracy theories and sci-fi paperbacks, doc martens with fraying laces, the red string of a thong peaking out purposely from jeans, leonine arch of your back and that stellar smile that says ‘you have no idea who you’re dealing with’, a rucksack permanently packed for the move, a streak of red across your lips, roller blades, cut knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, and piercing your own ears with a safety pin when your mom wouldn’t take you, kate moss posters lining the walls of a teenage bedroom, his name scrawled in rage across the pages of a diary, thumb holes poked through the cuffs of your sleeves, a tennis racket you punched through in a fit of temper, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes.

wanted plots

frinds !! unlikely friends !! toxic friends !! former best friends separated by sports rivalries ! sporting friends who are on other teams but who she absolutely loves playin against!!!

since greta literally can’t differentiate between romantic and platonic love, she’s got off with so many of her mates, so i want awkward friendships where they nearly dated, or exes that have now just turned into weird friendships

girls from the cheer team who she’s like, weirdly intimate with like the shower together but its not a Thing cos the other girls straight !!! what do u mean !! aha just fun !

and I want like, fellow criminology students who are like?? how is this bitch still passing?? i swear she goes out every night??

she works part time at a fast food restaurant, i want a mate that just goes and sits in there talking to her until her manager gets angry.

ppl she did a few modules with ie. art history, bio-med, film studies, before changing course and somehow sort of remaining in touch with

ppl who she runs track with.

someone she’s trying to make a zine with.

here’s a list of plots on her old blog if u want any of them w her.

would love plots of any type, throw them all at me please, i cnt wait to interact w all of u. like this if u want me to message you about connections / plots! xo

full biography if u can be bothered

trigger warnings: drugs, domestic abuse, gun.

you never meant for it to happen. you’d heard the stories, of girls who let their man walk all over them, and thought to yourself “i’ll never be one of those girls…” the kind that eat low-fat yoghurt and drink slim fast to shred a few extra pounds because he said she was getting round in the tummy, or the ones who spent their evenings tied to a kitchen sink drinking wine while him and the boys played poker, wishing god, if only I could get out of here. not you, not you raised by strong women, four bright shining beacons. single mother with her hard-as-nails attitude and her stony glares, elder sisters (twins) one ginger, one blonde, one doctor, one lawyer, both determined to take a bullet to the brain and a hammer to the patriarchy before they let a man touch them without asking. you were always so inferior, so insecure and small, like a bird (like a sparrow) with blonde plaits down your back sucking tropicana whilst your busom buds sucked dick, their lips permanently ripe with stories of their sexual exploits, fake tan and glittered nails whilst you sat in the unbroken egg of virginity wondering what it was like to be loved. one day you found out.

lily milligan’s parents gone and a free house for the night, bottles of ouzo and tequila swiped from your mother’s liquor cabinet thinking she wouldn’t know (she always knew) your legs, hardened from pep squad, slut dropping on a kitchen table because the boys thought it would be fun to get the quiet girl drunk. you’d never had a sip before that night. band t-shirts, denim shorts and the split soles of rotten converse that you refuse to let go of, you still clutched with both hands to your youth, but in a tube top now (borrowed from alice carmichael who had a sister in college) and a short tennis skirt, your feet not in trainers but in thigh-high boots. uncomfy as hell but lily said you needed to look sexy. you didn’t know if you wanted to be sexy. you didn’t know what kind of girl you were, if you were even a girl at all. but robbie looked at you like he knew exactly who you were, like he knew you better than you knew yourself, and his lips had the pink cupid’s bow of a movie star, and his hair was dark locks, curling like a mane. his hands were soft, and suddenly on your waist, and after three more shots his lips were on yours and his name was the only sound in your head and on your lips as you lost it in lily’s college sister’s bedroom beneath the glare of a T-Pain poster. you bled for what seemed like hours, his hand still in yours, kissing on the sofa as truth tellers and dare devils continued to spin a bottle of unprecedented youth. you thought it was love. robbie was the one. he loved you, you knew it, how else could someone be so soft? but soon he grew bored, scrunched up your paper heart and set it alight. then came the tears, the hatred, the ‘fuck robbie, in fact, fuck all boys.’ and that you did.

you were known for being easy. any boy could be yours for a night, as long as he promised to love you for those few short breaths and pants before you cried yourself to sleep. you felt poisoned, but poisonous as well, as if by ensnaring these young boys you were gaining power over them, and not the other way around. soon it started to work. they’d want more, but you’d deny them it, sick of sucking off silly schoolboys, they’d call you a tease, a vixen. maybe you were, but you couldn’t help but want older men. you got the history teacher first time, him bending you over his desk to sneak a hand up your tennis skirt as the after-school clubs carried on next door, unawares. love didn’t exist, not for you. it was nothing but a game for pretty young girls to play, bubble gum in their canines and a hand tugging at the hem of their cheer skirt.

there was so much anger inside of your small body, ‘beware of boys and their hook-like words’. hockey helped. there was something formidable about the feeling of a stick like a weapon in your hands and the thwack it made against thighs in the heat of a scrum - “slipped, sorry!” - you’d utter with a snakeskin smile, millicent quinn knowing that you’d hit her on purpose because she shagged robbie at that party last week. she couldn’t prove it, cobbled acne on her forehead turning green with disgust. ben came into your life like a car crash. two years your senior, with a baseball jacket and shoulders like a god. he became your personal hero. on the pitch, he was lethal. together, you could bring anyone to their ruin. each day after last period he’d be waiting in his car. you’d leap into his arms like a girl-half starved, love me, love me, love me, your heated kisses the envy of every junior girl. he was yours for three blissful years, utterly yours, and you were his, his star-spangled girl, and he was your knight - you were both the same, playing games, always difficult to predict. it was a shock to all when he proposed, high-school sweethearts find love in south dakota.

the engagement was a bittersweet affair; three months – you barely out of your gingham print skirts and into a graduation gown, him, a surly quarterback towering above your sisters, cigarette at his lips and a scowl like a fart in a lift. they hated him. so did you. but you were eighteen and in love, and he fitted the cookie cutter mould. everyone wanted him, and you had him. you had him and you were happy, happy, happy, and he loved you. he said he’d give you the world, anything you wanted hand-picked and given to you. instead, he gave you a jack russell terrier and a flat you couldn’t swing a cat in, wallpaper peeling like the rotten bits inside of you, the bits that only he knew. and you got tireder and tireder of the sad excuse of a life he’d picked out for you, him out doing god knows what to pay the bills, and you dancing on tables to pave your way to stardom, and this was love, this was real, until the shine wore off and your fresh-faced, dimple-cheeked cheerleader facade faded and the ugliness started to reveal itself, the whining, the petulance, the sharp-tempered cruelty, the mind games, the need to always win, win, win. he was dull, he was boring, he was nothing like the boy the girls had said he was and no chiselled six pack could hide his lack of anything remotely interesting, your patience wearing thin until it snapped like rubber, a rucksack on your back, running shoes on your feet and the joint bank account emptied into your eighth grade birthday wallet.

you built your small fortunes working the casinos of sioux falls, a crimson dress and an attitude to match. bookish archie with his little dipper freckles was fun for a month, before he became just as dull and dreary as the rest. a three hour bus and you were in minneapolis, bright eyed and bushy tailed, fresh meat ready for the pickings. a hostel here, a friendly co-worker’s sofa there as you made what you could by taking off your clothes and shaking your ass like you were back in pep squad, doing what you did best. you met your fair share of creeps, and soon it was back on the road to escape a wide-eyed stalker and a restless itch for more. milwaukee, chicago, you made the roads your own. log cabins and lodgings, and the occasional motel, a beaten up pick up truck purchased at a scrap merchants – you got a few miles out of it before it bit the dust, and when you finally set it alight after nights spent lounging across the driver’s seat, a parka tucked over you as a duvet, you were sad to see it go. you’re nomadic by fault, never attaching to place, people or things, creating a new personality in every place you go like a character actress; each town is a different repertory theatre, and you’re the star. a compulsive liar, you even fib about your own name, to some you’re ellen, nineteen, bookish, a law student who likes smoking and cosmos. to someone else you’re rita, you’re twenty five and look young for your age, like smoking, comics and fucking in public places.

in the bright lights of michigan, you found charlie, sweet charlie, too good for you, though you let him spoil you while he thought you were the small town girl of his dreams. next came abigail, who was fun until the jealously kicked in, and then luke, gorgeous luke, dangerous, exciting, who despite his temper, despite the fights, despite bruises down your spine and your teeth marks on his arms, loved you with the strength of a wild fire. there was destruction in your wishbones, a savageness from the field, from the pitch and now somehow in his arms, you were godly. he was cruel, he was careless, and he refused to fall at your feet like so many other boys had, which only you made you want him all the more. you were rage incarnate. you hated him so fiercely you thought you might kill him, so he played the only card you wouldn’t predict; proposed.

the house you shared was a backstreet flat in detroit, you making your name as a downtown singer while he footed the bill with pills. they had a drug for anything these days, to dull the senses, to pick them up, to drive you to insanity or pull you out of the madness hole. the two of you lived like criminals on the run (you never told him that you were, living out your days as the enigma he wanted you to be), you with your voice like caramel and fishnet legs. you were his and his alone until his hand was at your throat and the gun was in your hands screaming at him to stop, stop, stop, until a bullet stoppered his brain, crimson staining linoleum as you cast yourself out like lucifer. self defence was decreed the moment they saw your violet neck, black tears and headlight eyes and mind screaming red, red, red like the pom-poms you shook so willingly in school and the insides of his skull. you were gone, and “you” was born, renamed “greta”, boxed, shipped-out, and next-day delivered to livingstone where under witness protection you were a student, blank slate, fresh-faced in a place where no one knew your name, doing what you always did and starting again.

#this is soooOoOOO fuckin long cos every time i play greta i add more shit to it..... her seventh form will just be an entire fuckin novel.#anyway call me beep me if u wanna reach me #aka pls msg me either here or on discord. my discord is linday lohan's meth8664 #wshedintro

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kronos-the-timelord · 5 years

Note

Dude, do all of the numbers for that getting to know you better ask! Or half bc 200 is a lot :0

ahhhhhh,, you so nice

1: My name? - Margaret

2: Do I have any nicknames? - maggie, mag, mags, maggles, at one point my friends called me parky

3: Zodiac sign? - libra

4: Video game I play to chill, not to win? - i’ve never been too good at video games (but i like watching ppl playing them) and i’ve only ever had a wii so my sims kingdom was a favorite of mine

5: Book/series I reread? - divergent and pjo

6: Aliens or ghosts? - yes

7: Writer I trust enough to read whatever they write? - @kata-chthonia

8: Favourite radio station? - 103.3 fm, although i mostly listen to spotify now

9: Favourite flavour of anything? - grape and blue raspberry

10: The word that I use all the time to describe something great? - great or cool

11: Favourite song? - a to b by matt hires

12: The question you ask new friends to get to know them better? - it usually has to do with what drew me to them in the first place followed up by a version ‘why do you think that?’ i like knowing how ppl think bc it gives me a better way to start understand their view

13: Favourite word? - aurora

14: The last person who hurt me, did I forgive them? - i can’t really remember, so i dont know what that says :/

15: Last song I listened to? - serial killer by moncrieff

16: TV show I always recommend? - dexter or if they don’t like blood and violence, any of john mulaneys specials

17: Pirates or ninjas? - i liked pirates when i was younger, but ninjas are cool

18: Movie I watch when I’m feeling down? - any studio ghibli or song of the sea

19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song? - lately its been SLUT by bea miller

20: Favourite video games? - i really love boderlands, the art style is great

21: What am I most afraid of? - snakes and failing at something i’ve been saying that i wanted to do my entire life

22: A good quality of mine? - im nice??

23: A bad quality of mine? - im a bit aggressive and im really blunt about things

24: Cats or dogs? - dogs!! I like cats too but i dont know how to interact with them

25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they’re in? - he’s a voice actor, but crispin freeman is really cool!

26: Favourite season? - fall and spring

27: Am I in a relationship? - yeah, but it’s long distance during the school year ;-;

28: Something I miss? - my boi,, he’ll be back soon tho

29: My best friend? @keencheckerboard and @memeathon

30: Eye colour? - brown

31: Hair colour? - brown with red and blonde highlights

32: Someone I love? - my mom

33: Someone I trust? - @keencheckerboard

34: Someone I always think about? - @memeathon

35: Am I excited about anything? - finals to be over!

36: My current obsession? - bnha tbh

37: Favourite TV shows as a child? - i loved avatar and ed, edd, and eddy

38: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to? - to an extent, but i dont tell them /every/thing

39: Am I superstitious? - kind of

40: What do I think about most? - right now, school

41: Do I have any strange phobias? - not really, i mean i overthink a lot of things, but there’s no phobias

42: Do I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? behind

43: Favourite hobbies? - drawing/reading/writing/sleeping

44: Last book I read? - i think it was called stung, i actually finished it bc i wanted to complain about it properly

45: Last film I watched? - dumbo, my friend wanted to go see it, it wasnt good

46: Do I play any instruments? - i played clarinet for 3 years

47: Favourite animal? - dogs

48: Top 5 blog on Tumblr that I follow? - @wemakuu @wemakuutwo @keencheckerboard @memeathon @kata-chthonia

49: Superpower I wish I could have? - teleportation

50: How do I destress? - getting cozy and warm under my blankets with the lights off

51: Do I like confrontation? - i can be aggressive so i will be confrontational if i have to but i don’t go out of my way for it

52: When do I feel most at peace? - in my bed with the lights off

53: What makes me smile? - my friends, my boi, and goofy animal videos

54: Do I sleep with the lights on or off? - gotta be pitch black

55: Play any sports? - i played roller derby for 3 years

56: What is my song of the week? - really feeling be by hozier

57: Favourite drink? - …..water…. and a slushee

58: When did I last send a handwritten letter to somebody? - i think last summer???

59: Afraid of heights? - nope

60: Pet peeve? - slow walkers

61: What was the last concert I went to see? - does my high school’s band count???

62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian? - nah

63: What occupation did I want to do when I was younger? - ob nurse, i still do

64: Have I ever had a friend turn enemy? - no, i’ve had ppl i tolerated turn into ppl i hate tho

65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of? - bhna, but i feel the hero drama would get annoying after awhile

66: Something I worry about? - failing my classes

67: Scared of the dark? - nope

68: Who are my best friends? - this is the same as 29

69: What do I admire most about others? - their drive and where their motivation comes from

70: Can I sing? - no ;-;

71: Something I wish I could do? - sing

72: If I won the lottery, what would I do? - pay off my loans and (hopefully) for the rest of my college and then put whatever i had left into a savings account

73: Have I ever skipped school? - yes

74: Favourite place on the planet? - i think the smoky mountains are really pretty and i loved vacationing around them, but colorado was really neat too, so probs one of those places

75: Where do I want to live? - somewhere on the northeast coast!

76: Do I have any pets? - yeah!! He’s a doggo named dageus,,,, here he is,, the big boi!! (hes 121 pounds of love!!!!!)

77: What is my current desktop picture? - something @memeathon drew me

78: Early bird or night owl? - night owl

79: Sunsets or sunrise? - im usually awake during sunset, but sunrise is really pretty

80: Can I drive? - yeah!

81: Story behind my last kiss? - i was saying bye to my boi at the airport

82: Earphones or headphones? - earphones

83: Have I ever had braces? - yeah,, they weren’t fun

84: Story behind one of my scars? - i have a couple little ones from acne on my back but other than that i don’t have any

85: Favourite genre of music? - i think indie rock?? Is that a genre?? Punk maybe????

86: Who is my hero? - florence nightingale,, she was hella cool and i went to her museum in london

87: Favourite comic book character? - i didn’t read a lot of comic books but i always liked spiderman and witchblade

88: What makes me really angry? - when ppl make fun of my friends >:l

89: Kindle or real book? - i like real books but ebooks are nice for traveling!!

90: Favourite sporty activity? - roller derby or skating

91: What is one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be? - im not really sure what this question means????? But i didn’t like that in my middle school that the behavior coach(es) would already pick sides or would already hate kids that did nothing wrong and then in my high school no one cleaned up after themselves bc ‘the janitors can do it’ :/ it was really annoying

92: What was my favourite subject at school? - english/creative writing and art!!

93: Siblings? - i got an older brother who’s a big nerd

94: What was the last thing I bought? - i went to target last night and i got $68 worth of stuff including planty stuff, food, and gift stuff for my boyfriend’s moms

95: How tall am I? - 5’6” but i will not hesitate bitch

96: Can I cook? - yeah!

97: Can I bake? - yeah!

98: 3 things I love? - my friends/family, animals, and plants

99: 3 things I hate? - slow walkers, rasict/homo/trans/biphobic (anyone who just hates ppl for no reason tbh), and rude ppl >:l

100: Do I have more girl friends or boy friends? - more girl friends,,, i’ve kinda lost contact with most of my guy friends over the years,,,,

101: Who do I get on with better, girls or boys? - i feel more comfortable around other girls now but when i was younger i was okay with everyone

102: Where was I born? - in the cornfields of the midwest (i fucking hate this state)

103: Sexual orientation? - straight

104: Where do I currently live? - in the cornfields of the midwest, i am the creature you’re warned about, don’t walk alone at night

105: Last person I texted? - @memeathon : D

106: Last time I cried? - yesterday,,, finals hit me hard but i feel better now :D

107: Guilty pleasure? - uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,,,,,, looking at gross stuff,,, like surgeries and sometimes those pimple popping videos,,,,,,,,

108: Favourite Youtuber? - i’ve been watching a lot of gordon ramsay videos lately but i think brandon rogers or sovietwomble are up there

109: A photo of myself. - heres one i took on my break at work

110: Do I like selfies? - no,,, i don’t really like looking back on photos of myself bc i think i just look weird,, like even in my super nice senior photos,,, or baby pictures,,

111: Favourite game app? - does neko astsume count???

112: My relationship with my parents? - it’s p good :D

113: Favourite accents? - i’m not really sure,,, i think just a flat accent, like midwestern bc its the one im most familiar with so its like homey???????

114: A place I have not been but wish to visit? - japan,, nowhere in specific i just want to see the country

115: Favourite number? - 23!!!!

116: Can I juggle? - no

117: Am I religious? - im a polytheist (a bad one, but oh well)

118: Do I like space? - i love space!!!! Its so neat!!!!!!

119: Do I like the deep ocean? - no!!! Its awful!!!!

120: Am I much of a daredevil? - i think my friends think i am, but i dont really think so, i mean i’ll try anything if it sounds fun, but not everything

121: Am I allergic to anything? - not that i know of

122: Can I curl my tongue? - yes

123: Can I wiggle my ears? - no

124: Do I like clowns? - not really

125: The Beatles or Elvis? - a little bit of each

126: My current project? - my creative writing portfolio ;-; its not that hard but im trying to figure out how to get this character right

127: Am I a bad loser? - depends on what i lost in, like if it was a game i didn’t really care about than no, but if it was something that i cared about a lot than yeah

128: Do I admit when I wrong? - i always try to, but sometimes i don’t

129: Forest or beach? - forest,, i don’t like the beach,, too much sand

130: Favourite piece of advice? - it’s not really advice but just the reminder that your current situation is not your final destination

131: Am I a good liar? - i think so

132: Hogwarts house / Divergent faction / Hunger Games district? - slytherin (its funny bc im scared of snakes)/ dauntless/ and i think district 6 (i live in the crossroads of america so yeah)

133: Do I talk to myself? - all the fucking time

134: Am I very social? - sometimes, i am kinda a social introvert

135: Do I like gossip? - i like to hear it but not be part of it

136: Do I keep a journal/diary? - i have a bullet journal and i try to keep up with my habit and mood tracker daily

137: Have I ever hopelessly failed a test? - no, but i have gotten like high d’s and low c’s before that make me sad

138: Do I believe in second chances? - depends on what they messed up on the first chance, like if someone cheated then no

139: If I found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would I do? - i would like to say that i would return it with no money taken, but im just not sure :/

140: Do I believe people are capable of change? - yeah, if they’re really trying and realize that they need to, but even if they do change i know not everyone will accept them back into their lives and it shouldn’t be expected that they should after someone changes for the better

141: Have I ever been underweight? - no

142: Am I ticklish? - very and i have this weird tactile thing thats like i dont like ppl lightly touching me, it freaks me out

143: Have I ever been in a submarine? - no

144: Have I ever been on a plane? - yes!! I love flying!! Its so much fun!!

145: In a film about my life, who would I cast as myself, friends and family? - uhhhh,, im going to go by face,, i think for me - shailene woodley bc when she had her short hair ppl told me i looked like her @meme - liana liberato, she got the round face @keen - winona ryder (but back in beetlejuice) boyfriend - tucker west, i know he’s not an actor but he looks so much like him,,,, also it took me forever just to find these guys so im not finding family :p

146: Have I ever been overweight? - no

147: Do I have any piercings? - i have my ears pierced!

148: Which fictional character do I wish was real? - hari jurono,,, i love him ;-;

149: Do I have any tattoos? - no, but i already have some picked out that i want

150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far? - ummmm??? Im not sure?????

151: Do I believe in Karma? - yeah

152: Do I wear glasses or contacts? - contacts during the day and glasses at night

153: What was my first car? - i have a subaru crosstrek named inko!!! I love her!!

154: Do I want children? - no

155: Who is the most intelligent person I know? - my mom tbh,,, shes really smart

156: My most embarrassing memory? - omfg,, so this goes to show how oblivious i am about social interactions, but it was my first week in college and this junior was talking to me and i didnt realize he was flirting with me until after we traded snapchats and he left, so i panicked and never said anything to him again and blocked him

157: What makes me nostalgic? - when i walk around my neighborhood sometimes (i live near the preschool i went to) and i was over at my elementary school almost a year ago now, but i remember walking down the hall and seeing all the different teachers there now and it made me sad

158: Have I ever pulled an all-nighter? - yes, just last week

159: Which do I value more in others, brains or beauty? - brains

160: What colour mostly dominates my wardrobe? - darker colors like black and blue, but im trying to get lighter ones in there too

161: Have I ever had a paranormal experience? - yes, many times, but the one that sticks out to me is that one night i woke up at like 5 am for no reason, but i was just suddenly wide awake and something felt off, so i was trying to get comfy again and flipped over on my other side so i was facinging the door into my room instead of my wall and in front of my door was a tall black figure with red eyes staring at me and when i blinked it went away,, now i know this can be explained by some other things but with my family it seems more likely to be paranormal

162: What do I hate most about myself? - uhh, i procrastinate way too much

163: What do I love most about myself? - i always support my friends

164: Do I like adventure? - depends on the adventure,,, i like traveling, but not too much walking bc i have bad knees

165: Do I believe in fate? - not really

166: Favourite animal? - question 47

167: Have I ever been on radio? - no, but i was on my school’s announcements and i hated it

168: Have I ever been on TV? - no

169: How old am I? - 19

170: One of my favourite quotes? - “The Gods envy us. They envy us because we’re mortal, because any moment could be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we’re doomed”

171: Do I hold grudges? - im petty

172: Do I trust easily? - no,, im just cautious around ppl bc i just don’t know them

173: Have I learnt from my mistakes? - some of them

174: Best gift I’ve ever received? - im not too sure,,, i got a p cool backpack for my birthday tho that i use everyday

175: Do I dream? - yeah, cant remember too many tho

176: Have I ever had a night terror? - no??

177: Do I remember my dreams, and what is one that comes to mind? - can’t remember a lot after i wake up, but i just recently had one with some bnha characters in it, i can’t remember what happened, i just know that they were there

178: An experience that has made me stronger? - i know this might sound a bit morbid, but my aunt’s funeral, it was the first funeral i went to where i understood what was happening and it made me more open to learning and accepting death

179: If I were immortal, what would I do? - want to fucking die,,, i’ve never understood ppl who are scared of dying/want to live forever,, like why would you want that??? What’s the point??? You’ll just watch everyone you love die,,, i know it’s going to be hard on me when that happens to my closer family members, but even the new ppl you befriend,, i just couldn’t

180: Do I like shopping? - yeas

181: If I could get away with a crime, what would I choose to do? - tax evasion

182: What does “family” mean to me? - the ppl who i care about deeply and who love me, not all of them are blood related and not all the blood related ones are part of it

183: What is my spirit animal? - idk?????? Maybe a turtle???

184: How do I want to be remembered? - tbh, i don’t really want to be remembered

185: If I could master one skill, what would I choose? - drawing

186: What is my greatest failure? - im not sure

187: What is my greatest achievement? - uhh, i feel like its hard to point at a specific point and be like “that was the best thing i could have done, if i didn’t do that i wouldn’t be who i am today”

188: Love or money? - money

189: Love or career? - career

190: If I could time travel, where and when would I want to go? - probably to some point in the future,, i dont know where tho

191: What makes me the happiest? - the ppl i care about being happy

192: What is “home” to me? - the house i currently live in,, my family is here and im surrounded by ppl i love,, it’ll probably change with time, but for now its here

193: What motivates me? - spite

194: If I could choose my last words, what would they be? - it’s important to keep moving forward, don’t let the past hold you down

195: Would I ever want to encounter aliens? - kind of, i think it would be p cool

196: A movie that scared me as a child? - it wasn’t a movie but i know the animated wolf from peter and the wolf freaked me out

197: Something I hated as a child that I like now? - i hated mushrooms, but i love them now

198: Zombies or vampires? - vampires

199: Live in the city or suburbs? - suburbs super close to city

200: Dragons or wizards? - DRAGONS

201: A nightmare that has stayed with me? - its silly but when i was younger it would be my mom and i going to the mall downtown and the escalators were missing the part that connected them to the floor so you had to hop over it and when we would get to the 4th floor i would miss the jump and fall

202: How do I define love? - i know a lot of ppl are like “i would die for you or kill for you” something along those lines but i think it’s more living for someone, wanting to see them accomplish everything they wanted, being there for them during their lows203: Do I judge a book by its cover? - yeah, i wont pick up something that doesnt catch my eye

204: Have I ever had my heart broken? - no

205: Do I like my handwriting? - yeah!! Its loopy

206: Sweet or savoury? - sweet

207: Worst job I’ve had? - ive liked all the jobs ive had

208: Do I collect anything? no

209: Item of clothing or jewellery you’ll never see me without? - a hoodie/sweater of some kind

210: What is on my bucket list? - going to greece

211: How do I handle anger? - i usually rant for a bit, maybe cry to get the extra hormones out, maybe break something

212: Was I named after anyone? - no, but i did have the same name as my great grandma

213: Do I use sarcasm a lot? - yes

214: What TV character am I most like? - im been watching bnha a lot so i think either kirishima or uraraka

215: What is the weirdest talent I have? - i can cross my eyes and then move one of them

216: Favourite fictional character? - ,,,,, im not sure,, i really love eric from divergent

#that took forever #it kept getting deleted and i would have to start over #sorry it took so long #selfie #????

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dipulb3 · 4 years

Text

Ikea Fyrtur smart shade review: I'm keeping this thing

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/ikea-fyrtur-smart-shade-review-im-keeping-this-thing-3/

Ikea Fyrtur smart shade review: I'm keeping this thing

The window on my home’s front door has no curtain or blind, which is something I’ve long wanted to fix since it looks straight out onto the street. There are plenty of basic options that will get the job done, but I’ve been holding out for something a little fancier — and preferably something that I can automate, or control with my voice. I mean, come on. Who doesn’t want to live like a Bond villain?

Incredible value compared to competitors like Lutron, Somfy and Tilt.

Easy-to-use app covers all of the bases for smart control, grouping and scheduling.

Simple, easy to use voice controls vie Siri, Alexa or the Google Assistant.

Removable, rechargeable lithium-ion battery.

Magnetic wireless remote comes included.

Don’t Like

Totally non-customizable design, available only in gray.

Slightly ugly metal housing.

Gateway device for app and voice controls sold separately.

Mounting screws not included.

No way to manually raise or lower the shades when the battery is dead.

Enter the budget-friendly home furnishings of Ikea. After initially getting its feet wet with the Tradfri smart lighting system, the Swedish retailer announced in 2018 that it was working on app- and voice-enabled roller blinds to go with it. Initially pitched for release in April of 2019, the blinds hit a number of delays during development before quietly starting to hit stores toward the end of the year under the Fyrtur name.

That was welcome news for me, because Ikea’s smart shades support voice controls via Siri, Alexa or the Google Assistant and start at just $129. Most everything else in the smart shade category costs quite a bit more than that.

How much more? Well, motorized roller shades of all sizes cost a flat $399 apiece from Tilt, and you have to pay extra for the hub that smartens them up and syncs them with your voice assistant of choice (“Free shipping on orders over $2,000,” the website reads). A single motorized smart blackout shade from Lutron’s Serena collection similar to the ones we tested at the CNET Smart Home a few years back added up to about $660 when I customized it to fit my door’s window on the Serena website and added in a Lutron Bridge for app and voice control — and you’ll play in the same high-priced ballpark if you’re shopping for Lutron’s new smart wood blinds, too. What about a smart shade from Somfy? You’ll have to connect with a third-party dealer and pay who knows what.

All of that gives Ikea’s Fyrtur shades the look of a game-changer for the category. And the value is indeed pretty strong here, especially for folks like me who have long felt priced out of the category altogether. It isn’t the prettiest-looking piece of window dressing — and you can’t customize the design at all, which is a drag — but if you just want the Bond villain satisfaction of telling your voice assistant of choice to lower the shades without needing to spend one meeeeellion dollars on them, then these are the roller blinds you’ve been waiting for.

Ry Crist/CNET

The Fyrtur is now

Available now, Ikea’s Fyrtur smart shades come in eight different sizes. Each one is 76 inches long when the shade is fully extended, but the width varies from 23 inches ($129) up to 48 inches ($179). There’s very little markup from size to size, and just $50 separating the smallest Fyrtur from the largest, so good on Ikea for not bilking people here. For my front door’s window, I went with the 27-inch version, which costs $139.

No matter what size you need, your shade will come with heather gray blackout fabric and a metal, industrial-looking overhang. I wouldn’t call it ugly, but it definitely isn’t eye-catching. You can’t customize the way they look at all, either — no special-cut sizes, no fancy colors or materials, no nothin’. That’s the key trade-off here — competitors like Lutron and Somfy will let you customize your shades in all sorts of ways, but they cost substantially more than what Ikea’s asking.

Ikea Fyrtur Smart Shade sizes

Width (inches) 23 27 30 32 34 36 38 48 Price $129 $139 $149 $154 $159 $164 $169 $179

Each Fyrtur shade comes with a rechargeable lithium-ion battery to power it, a wireless remote to control it at a touch, and mounting brackets that you’ll need to screw it into place. They don’t come with screws, though. Since your mounting needs will vary, Ikea makes you pick out your own screws, which feels like a bit of a cop-out since it could have included two or three sets of the most commonly used varieties, along with instructions on what to get if you need something else.

Okay, made a quick run to the hardware store this morning for some lath screws — now, I’ve got those brackets in place above the door window and the Ikea Fyrtur smart blind hanging neatly in place. Time to finish setup and start testing it out. pic.twitter.com/BWIm7xc5by

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) June 3, 2020

Still, after a quick trip to the hardware store to grab a fresh pack of self-drilling no. 8 lath screws, I was all set to drill the thing into place at the top of my door. Doing so was relatively painless — just measure to determine where the brackets should go, mark the spots with a pencil, and screw them in. Once you’ve done that, the entire Fyrtur blind clips into place beneath them. It’s somewhat heavy, but the brackets do a good job at keeping everything secure

Trip to the hardware store aside, I was able to install one myself in about 20 minutes (and I was tweeting each step of the way, too — here’s the link to that thread in case you want to see the play-by-play).

Each Fyrtur blind comes with a magnetic wireless remote.

Ry Crist/CNET

Smart controls

Once the blind is installed, you’ll use the included Micro-USB cable to give the battery a quick charge, and then pop it into place in the housing. At that point, you’ll be able to push a pair of inconspicuous buttons on the overhang to move the blind up and down. Plug in an odd-looking, two-piece signal repeater that comes with each blind, and you’ll be able to pair the wireless remote with your blinds, too. Just unscrew the back, insert the coin battery, and then hold a pairing button down while holding it up close to the blind. It’s magnetic, too, which is a nice touch if you just want to keep the thing on the fridge.

You’ll need Ikea’s Tradfri Gateway plugged into your router in order to control the blinds from the app or with a voice command. It sells separately for $35.

Ry Crist/CNET

For app and voice controls, you’ll need Ikea’s Tradfri Gateway plugged into your router. It sells separately for a reasonable $35, and works just like a Philips Hue Bridge, translating the Zigbee signals sent by your Tradfri lights and Fyrtur blinds into something your home network can understand. The Tradfri app also includes controls for Ikea’s line of smart speakers, though I didn’t have one on hand to test out how well those integrate into the system.

With the Gateway up and running and everything properly paired up, you’ll be able to raise and lower the blinds from your Android or iOS device. You can also program your blinds to open and close on an automated schedule. And, importantly, the app tells you how to specify a maximum extension length for each blind, which keeps it from spooling out onto your floor when you tell it to lower to 100%.

In my case, I only needed a little more than half of the full 76 inches of fabric in order to cover the window on my door — so, I extended the blind to that point and then held down some buttons for a few seconds in order to lock that length in. Once I did, the blind wouldn’t go any lower than that when I tried to close it. Perfect.

One other quick note about the app: It includes a well-organized privacy policy that makes clear what info Ikea collects about you as you use your smart shades. And, as you might expect from a company based in Europe, where privacy laws are a lot stronger than they are in the US, those details are sensible and sound. Namely, the app collects IP addresses and access tokens used to connect with Amazon, Apple and Google. Ikea lists all of the ways it uses and protects that data, and says that it doesn’t share that data with anyone other than authorized IT service providers.

Ikea’s Tradfri app lets you control or automate your blinds from your phone, and it’ll tell you how to connect with a voice assistant, too.

Screenshots by Ry Crist/CNET

The app also offers instructions on how to pair with Siri, Alexa or the Google Assistant. I mainly use Alexa in my home, so I started there, and had the connection up and running in about a minute. Everything worked great. When I told Alexa to lower the shade, the shade would drop down to my preset maximum length. When I told Alexa to raise the shade, it neatly wound itself back up. When I told Alexa to set the shade to 50%, the shade raised to cover the top half of the window. Those same basic controls worked well with Siri and the Google Assistant, too.

You can also control those blinds using the automated controls offered by each of those three voice platforms. For instance, I have an Alexa routine that turns off lights and sets the thermostat whenever I go to bed. Now, that routine makes sure the shade is closed, too.

If you’re an Apple HomeKit user, you’ll be able to see what percentage the blind’s rechargeable battery is at in the Home app.

Ry Crist/CNET

Controls like those are more or less the same on each platform, with some slight differences (one nice extra on the Apple HomeKit front: the Home app will tell you what percentage the blind’s battery is at). Between that, the voice controls, and the app scheduling, Ikea’s shades offer everything I want as far as smarts are concerned.

Still, these blinds don’t get everything right. Though the heather gray looks fine to me, the most obvious issue is the lack of any color choices for the fabric, and there aren’t any Ikea alternatives for folks looking for smart slatted-style blinds, or cellular blinds, either.

Another issue: While you get those two little buttons on the blind housing as a form of physical control, you can’t manually roll the blinds by hand when they aren’t powered. The rechargeable battery packs are a pretty nice touch here, and more convenient than the D-cell batteries needed to power Lutron’s luxurious Serena shades, but that still seems like an oversight to me.

Ry Crist/CNET

I’m keeping it

As a badly needed value pick in an intriguing smart home category, Ikea’s Fyrtur smart shades check all of the boxes. The design is admittedly basic, especially the clunky-looking metal housing, but that doesn’t bother me too much at this price. More important is that the Fyrtur shade was easy to install, easy to program and connect with whatever voice assistant you like, and easy to use. It brings some new utility to my smart home that I couldn’t previously afford. I’ll take it.

I mean that literally, by the way. I paid for this thing and I like it enough to keep it right where it is at my front door. Along with making my living room feel a bit more private and high tech, it’ll give me a good, first-hand sense of how long the battery lasts on a charge (hopefully at least a few months with light usage). I’ll report back once I have that info, but for now, I’m more than comfortable recommending Ikea’s Fyrtur blinds to just about anyone interested in adding smart shades to their smart home setup without breaking the bank.

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onlyjihoons · 7 years

Text

cotton candy;l.g.l

wannawrite said:WELL YOU BOUTA GET BUSY NOW full offence but i rlly need some cute guanlin fluff in my life ??? so pls write me some quality 😫😤👏🏼 'Guanlin takes you to an amusement park and confesses' pLS FEED ME IM

a/n; YES MY CHILD THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING,,,,,full offence im lowkey soft for guanlin, i really hope you like it

starting line: “You’re as sweet as cotton candy”

synopsis: guanlin takes you to disneyland, also revealing a side of him you have never seen before

warnings: none, i think

genre: non-idol!au, floof, slight angst if you squint properly

You woke up to your ringtone piercing through your dream. You groaned, who on earth would disrupt your precious sleep time on a school holiday?

Without much thought, you unplugged your phone from the charger as you slid the “answer” button and placed your phone to your ears.

“Hello?” You answered groggily.

“Y/N?” You heard your best friend’s voice on the other side of the line, you immediately shot up.

“Yes?” A smile etched on your face as the your cheeks started to heat up.

You hear Guanlin chuckle at the other side of the line, “It’s a videocall Y/N.”

You slowly peeled the phone away from your face, as you see Guanlin’s handsome face on your phone screen. His hair was in a mess, and it was dark, but his good looks practically shone through the phone screen, sometimes you question how you deserved such a sweetheart like Guanlin.

You and Guanlin were best friends since kindergarten, living in the same estate area since the both of you were young. The both of you attended the same primary and secondary schools, also conveniently classmates for the past 10 years. Naturally, the both of you sat next to each other in classes and also walk home together.

Growing up, the both of you would have lunch at each others’ house, courtesy of the both of your mothers. The two of them would always joke how the both of you are almost set to get married, pushing the both of you towards each other. Shy smiles and pushing comments, how you wished it was real, but considering how Guanlin treated you as nothing more as a friend, you decided not to get your hopes too high up. Especially when he has a hoard of fangirls in school going after him.

“No…My face is bloated and I have no makeup on.” You faced your front camera away from your face, showing the wall beside your bed.

“Stop whining and be ready in 20 minutes.” With that, Guanlin hung up and you were left confused.

“What’s wrong with this kid honestly...” You muttered to yourself as you lazily slung your legs off the bed.

“Y/N!” Your mother called you from outside.

“What is it mom?” You called back as you wriggled into your shorts.

“Guanlin is here!”

“Oh crap,” You muttered to yourself, as you brushed through your hair in a hurry, not wanting to let Guanlin wait for you. Just as you were about to start looking for your makeup, Guanlin let himself into your room, leaving the door slightly ajar.

“I’m so sorry, just give me 15 minutes...” You rummaged through your makeup bag for your bb cushion, as you swore you put it in there yesterday.

Guanlin grabbed a tinted lipbalm from your stash of lipbalm, then pulling your face towards his, as he applied the lipbalm meticulously on your lips. Your heart couldnt help but to do flips at the heart-fluttering actions. He’s just impatient, you thought.

“Done.” Guanlin pulled away, “You don’t even need makeup honestly, you look just fine without it.”

“Well, thanks?” You didn’t know whether to feel offended or touched by Guanlin’s words honestly, as you shrugged your shoulders and went with the latter.

“Where are the two of you going?” Your mother questioned with her arms akimbo, pointing to your interlocked arms with Guanlin.

“We’re--”Before Guanlin could complete his sentence, your mother interrupted, “No, no, it okay, you don’t have to tell me. Enjoy your date, sweetie!”

“I--”

“Just go,” Your mother pushed you and Guanlin out of the apartment, leaving the both of you in bewilderment.

“So, where are we going?” You raised your eyebrow at Guanlin, who only shot you a smirk.

“You’ll see.”

Being the direction-crippled person you are, you had absolutely no idea where Guanlin was bringing you to until you neared your destination.

“Disneyland?”

“Yeah. You’re disappointed?” Guanlin put his arm around your seat as he scooted closer to you.

“No... I was just surprised.” You shook your head, attempting to also shake off the blush forming on your cheeks.

As the both of you were scanning the available ticketing options at the counter, you gape at the prices of the tickets, pulling at Guanlin’s shirt, “Yah, let’s just go somewhere else, the tickets here are so expensive.”

“No way, I already bought the tickets beforehand, let’s not waste my money.” Guanlin interlocked his fingers with yours, squeezing it a little.

You frowned, Guanlin was acting weirdly today, being a gentleman at everything. Not like he wasn’t on usual days, he just was exceptionally nice today. You really wanted to question Guanlin’s change of demeanor, but you decided to shrug it off, lest Guanlin got offended.

After the both of you collected your tickets, you read the back of the ticket, wait, it wasn’t a ticket but a card of a picture of minnie mouse printed on it. At the back read, “SPECIAL PASS ALL ACCESS” ,slung on a Disneyland lanyard.

Once the both of you entered the theme park, you made a beeline for the souvenir shop, to the headband section. You picked out a Minnie headband for yourself, and a Mickey headband for Guanlin. You tip-toed and tried to reach for the boy’s head, but your best friend was too tall for you to reach.

Guanlin smiled, then slightly lowering his height by slightly splitting his legs apart. He lightly ruffled your hair, which made you puzzled.

“You’re so cute, Y/N,” Guanlin mumbled.

“Yeah, thanks idiot.” Your eyes wrinkled to crescents, which made Guanlin smile even wider.

When you proceeded to the counter to pay, the cashier told you that all of your expenses were already covered for, which shocked you. Was Guanlin the owner of Disneyland or something? Everything that happened so far was like a dream, and also a rest from the mugging for your upcoming exams thus far.

“Are you the owner of Disneyland or something?” You linked your arms with Guanlin, who stiffened up but later relaxed slowly, “Everything’s been covered for us.”

“It’s a secret,” Guanlin winked, which made you cringe slightly, “Just kidding, I just paid a little extra for that.”

“By extra do you mean--”

“Let’s go on the roller coaster!” Guanlin dragged you to the nearest roller coaster he could spot, and the blood in your veins went cold.

You didn’t really liked roller coasters, in fact, you didn’t see the fun in strapping yourself to a plastic seat and being thrown in different directions. You had wanted to overcome your fear of roller coasters for a long time, but you didn’t find the courage to do so.

Looks like this time, it was your chance.

You can do this, Y/N, don’t be a pussy and just get on that ride and try to enjoy yourself.

Thanks to Guanlin, you didn’t need to even join the 2-hour long queue to get to the roller coaster, you just had to scan your card at the express lane, and it only took you a 3 minutes wait before you could get on to the cart.

“Are you okay?” Guanlin stared at you, your face as white as sheet. “We can get off if you want.”

“No, no, its okay,” You grimaced, “I’ll get over it.”

Without warning, the cart blasted at an insane speed, one moment you’re facing the sky, one moment you’re facing the ground. It was a thrilling experience really, you began to scoff at your earlier fear of roller coasters.

After a few rides, you and Guanlin were hungry, the both of you decided to grab lunch at a nearby restaurant. The food offered in the restaurant were really adorable, some of the dishes in the shape of Mickey Mouse’s head. Of course, the food was delicious, but you were still hungry.

Guanlin suggested going to the snack stalls to grab some churros, and you willingly agreed. Guanlin smiled to himself at your child-like behaviour when you eyed the menu, pointing to whichever snack you desired. Sometimes he wished you actually felt the same way about him, he was on the brink of giving up on his $500 confession plan given your obliviousness.

When the both of you settled down on a seat, Guanlin put his chin on his palm, admiring you inhaling the food that you ordered.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” You waved your hand in front of him, mouth full with food.

“Nothing, its just... you’re as sweet as cotton candy.”

“What’s wrong with you honestly, you can’t stop being so nice,” You placed the back of your hand on Guanlin’s forehead, “are you sick?”

“I’m not sick,” Guanlin swatted your hand away, “just eat up, I want to go on more rides.”

You scowled at Guanlin’s split personalities, one moment he’s sweet, one moment he’s back to your best friend.

Ride after ride, the sun slowly dimmed and it was already 5pm. The sun was beginning to set, radiating a beautiful orange hue in the sky.

“Let’s take a break, I’m tired.” Guanlin sat down on a nearby bench, leaning against the backrest.

“What happened to the ‘I’ll ride all rides’ Guanlin?” You teased, taking the seat beside him.

“Shut up, I’m tired.” Guanlin muttered under his breath.

“Guanlin?”

“Hmm?”

“Thanks for today. Really. I enjoyed myself very much.” You turned to face Guanlin, who turned to face you as well.

“You’re welcome, I splurged alot on today.” Guanlin laughed, which made you hit his shoulder playfully, “How much did you even spend? Tell me honestly.”

“Its a secret babe,” Guanlin winked which made you frown and turn your attention back to the setting sun.

A wave of comfortable silence washed over before you began, “The sunset’s really pretty.”

“Like you.” Guanlin casually remarked, making you giggle.

“What’s up with you today seriously?” You pushed your fingers in between Guanlin’s eyebrows, the force sending him leaning backwards. “Your pick up lines are so cheesy.”

“Honestly, I brought you here to confess to you, Y/N,” Guanlin sighed, “I really like you, I really don’t like that we have that friendship wall in between us. I have been trying to break it down but whenever I do so, you build it back up. I honestly don’t know whether you’ll like me back, but I really like you Y/N.”

You fell silent at Guanlin’s mini ramble, shocked at his words.

“Whatever, I’m just gonna,” Guanlin’s eyes slightly flickered to your lips, then swiftly leaning in to place a light kiss on your lips, leaving you dumbfounded.

“I’m sorry if you don’t feel the same way Y/N, I shouldn’t have did that.” The tips of Guanlin’s ears turned pink, slightly turning away from you.

“N-no, I like you too, Idiot.” You held Guanlin’s face in your hands, making him face you, “You’re so stupid you know that, you shouldn’t have splurged this much just to confess to me.”

Guanlin extended his arms, as you welcomed yourself into his embrace, warm and calming.

“Are you my boyfriend now?” You asked, making Guanlin click his tongue.

“What are you talking about, this is our first day as a couple, idiot.” Guanlin ruffled your hair, pecking your lips once again, as you smiled into a kiss you’d never forget.

#omg im sorry if this is crap #lai guanlin #lai guanlin scenarios #wanna one #wanna one scenarios #produce 101 scenarios #produce 101 season 2 #Fluffy writes

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nicolelelelelele · 6 years

Text

get to know meme...?

thanks @fluorescenthoodie and @literal-treasure too tbh i hope u enjoy reading about lil ol’ me 🤗

1. Are you named after anyone?

lol ok so my middle name is Indy-Rose. my dad is a huge fan of indy car racing so that’s p much where that half came from 🙄 and my mom’s name is Rosa, so ye 🥀💜

2. When was the last time you cried?

last night lmao i don’t often go more than a day without pouring water out of my eyes

3. Do you like your handwriting?

i have a lot of different versions of my handwriting, and each one is p much trying to emulate some other persons handwriting that i’ve liked, sooo i guess i love everyone’s but my own?

4. What’s your favorite lunch meat?

yo i used to fucking love turkey sandwiches with doritos in them to give that extra CRONCH. i miss that tbh

5. Do you have kids?

yes. their names are leo, cappie, tilly, and mocha. i guess teeechnically only 2 children and 2 grandchildren, since tilly birthed the first two at the ripe age of 1. currently i’ve only got custody of my most recent child, mocha, while my mother has custody of the other three. 🐈

6. If you were a different person, would you be friends with you?

like if i was a 3rd person? ima guess that’s what this question is asking... uhh probably? as much as i hate myself on a deep and unhealthy level, i also think i’m fucking fantastic and would be amazing to hang out with on the daily

7. Do you use sarcasm?

ima be honest here, i’ve tried to tone it down it recent years because in high school i was an overly sarcastic ASSHOLE so like these days i try to be pretty straight up so people don’t get the wrong impression about what i’m tryna say

8. Do you still have your tonsils?

yup, i thankfully don’t snore or have any issues w them so i like them where they are. i have plenty other reasons to sit at home for two weeks eating ice cream.

9. Would you bungee jump?

nop. do not like. roller coasters? yes. free fallin’? no.

10. What’s your favorite cereal?

if i had the money it’d be just a really plain cereal like rice chex or something but i’d put fresh strawberries and blueberries in it every day.

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

i will always find a way to be the laziest version of myself, so no.

12. Do you think you’re a strong person?

i bench like 250 and can lift my own body off the ground for minutes at a time. 🏋🏽‍♀️ (i’m weak as fuck in just about every category, but will still manage to to drag you to hell in one way or another if u fuck w me or someone i care about)

13. What’s your favorite ice cream?

probs vanilla which is p ironic haha

14. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

depends on the person i guess? i can’t really pinpoint one thing, i think it’s probably just like their most defining personality trait? i basically always just notice what makes them ~them~ and that really sticks with me

15. What’s your least favorite physical thing about yourself?

the hair on my arms. thanks kid from junior high for pointing that out and making me forever self conscious about it! you know who you are 🙃

16. What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now?

dark blue jeans and white old skools

17. What are you listening to right now?

miss you by mura masa

18. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?

IS THAT A WEEEED?

no it’s a crayo-

IM CALLING THE POLICE!

anyway yeah like a minty blueish green or maroon idk they’re both my fave colors tbh

19. Who was the last person you talked on the phone with?

my fucking homie at our local taco truck what a hero 💯

20. Favorite sport to watch?

once upon a time it was baseball i guess but thanks to my s.o. i am now a slut for basketball

21. Hair color?

not the color that i want it to be

22. Eye color?

~hazel~ aka it seems to depend on what colors i’m wearing on any given day lol

23. Do you wear contacts?

nah fam

24. Favorite food?

either enchiladas or pupusas or pickles they’re p much all tied for first

25. Scary movie, or comedy?

i used to really like scary movies but i think the realities of life scare me enough on a daily basis that i should probs just stick to comedy and try to laugh away my sorrows.

26. Last movie you watched?

this is a Very Good Question™ to which i do not know the answer. ask me again this weekend and the answer will be Ladybird (saoirse please mother my children)

27. What color shirt are you wearing?

white. and it has emojis on it. it’s from a festival i went to ok i’m not totally a walking meme

28. Summer or winter?

i love winter because it ideally has all of my favorite things like snow and pretty lights and cozy sweaters and christmas and my birthday and all of those things are 10/10 but on the other hand... summer in the city means cleavage, cleavage, cleavage...

29. Hugs or kisses?

hugs for everyone, kisses for the right person

30. Book you’re currently reading?

i’m really bad at sitting down and reading books so i’ll just answer with the most recent book i’ve purchased: Waves Passing in the Night by Lawrence Weschler. it’s about the sound designer Walter Murch and astrophysics and a bunch of other cool shit idk i still need to read it!

31. Who do you miss right now?

my mom

32. What’s on your mousepad?

zwei’s booty

33. What’s the last TV program you watched?

The Bold Type. #kadena owns my ass

34. What’s the best sound?

😏 but also the little chirp cats make when they see a birb outside a window

35. Rolling Stones or the Beatles?

for some reason i never realized that twist and shout was by the beatles and i FUCKING LOVE that song so i guess that’s that?

36. What’s the furthest you’ve ever travelled?

lemme just give you a glimpse into my devastatingly lacking travel history: raised in cali, visited vegas twice before the age of 9, now living in new york. that’s it. going somewhere? take me with you p l e a s e

37. Do you have any special talent?

i can tie a cherry stem with my tongue 😉 also i sometimes think i can sing so check out my latest sad cover over at soundcloud.com/nicolelelelele/youth and cry with me!

38. Where were you born?

the place that *contains* the happiest place on earth but definitely *isn’t* the happiest place on earth: anaheim, california

@onehundredsevendays ur the only one i can think to tag in this rn so hop on bud

#ask meme

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krisremade000 · 7 years

Note

multiples of 10 for the ask thing?

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

my friend, alicia

20. Do you like your neighbors?

ya!! they’re rlly nice. they give my family gifts every now and then :’’)

30. Do you ever want to get married?

i do..

40. What do you want to do after high school?

go straight to college? i mean taking a break sounds nice but ehhh

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

gray

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

ye, it was an art competition.

70. Names of your bestfriends?

tier, em, jijo, lucky, and gen

80. What colour pants?

im not wearing pants rn sdfkjaSDFJHSD

90. Name a person you love?

i love too many ppl to just say one!

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

i liked someone so much that i felt like i was at the high part of a roller coaster 24/7, but i also have liked them to the point it hurt

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

yes

130. Do you like subway?

ofc

140. Summer or Winter?

SUMMER!!!!!! summer!!!!!!!! fuckj winter

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

i dont have any books near me

#asks #anon #ty!!!!!#Anonymous

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mrbronzeskull · 7 years

Note

Lmao answer them all and good luck ;)

I’m reblogging this, sans readmore, as it was brought to my attention that for at least one person, everything under that just didn’t show up. I humbly beg forgiveness for putting such a huge chunk of text on everyones dash.Spacey, you cheeky sod. I swear this is like the second time you’ve done this. (I both love and hate you for it) Here we fucking go: THIS TOOK AN HOUR AND A HALF TO DO

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?I don’t exactly get physical with folks so I have to assume it was my ex, several months ago.2. Are you outgoing or shy?Shy, Bi and ready to die3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?@gpumidnazora, some day.4. Are you easy to get along with?I guess so? Not very argumentative, very quiet, tell bad jokes.5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?I’d like to think so.6. What kind of people are you attracted to?All of them. More feminine aligned folks usually but super masc folks and androgynous peeps have totally taken my breath away too. Less general note, nerdy folk who I can obsess over something with. 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?I mean, I’m in one now and while it does have a massive issue because of distance, I’d like to think we can tough it out.8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?My girlfriend.9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?A little, I get flustered easily if im not super close with folks.10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?Fuck, uh, myself? I often have super deep conversations that I should probably talk to a therapist or someone about just aloud to myself. But if that isnt an acceptable answer, @gpumidnazora takes the cake.11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?“Oh hell, I thought I said hi when I got home and was all like ‘huh, she hasn’t replied, guess she’s already asleep” after I goofed up on letting my gf know I got home on time.12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?OH! I got one from just this morning! Let’s Face It I’m Cute by 11 Acorn Lane.Aside from that I’ve been all nostalgic lately so Mr Brightside by The KillersTeenage Dirtbag by WheatusGoodbye Stranger by SupertrampEverytime We Touch by Cascada13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?Yes. Please do. I’m a big sucker for this. Or any physical affection really. 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?Miracles not so much but its real hard to not think of things as lucky or unlucky for me15. What good thing happened this summer?I got plenty of hours at work! 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?Nope. No. Nuh. There’s two girls it might be and neither of those would be a good choice.17. Do you think there is life on other planets?I mean, it’s literally either that or we are completely alone in the entire universe. Which seems far more terrifying to me. So yeah. But I’m always thinking like microbial or basic life, rather than you know, aliens replete with UFOs and such.18. Do you still talk to your first crush?Nah, havent talked to her in years.19. Do you like bubble baths?I almost always shower, too big for the bath really.20. Do you like your neighbors?Fuck dude I dont even know my neighbours21. What are you bad habits?God, what isnt? Nail biting, snacking, bad sleep schedule, shower delays, then too long in the shower, generally messy22. Where would you like to travel?Canada, Tokyo, America, Brazil, Europe, New Zealand. Anywhere with snow23. Do you have trust issues?Yes? I’m not all that open. Until I am and it’s like BAM HERE’S MY ENTIRE LIFE STORY which is too much typically.24. Favorite part of your daily routine?Jerkin’ it just soooo right. Kidding. Mostly. Anytime cuddling my cat while catching up on Youtube videos is great.25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?My back. just all of that. Beats out the chewed nails and the flab and the face any time.26. What do you do when you wake up?Regret27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?Darker. But I’m such a shut in so that aint happening. Least it looks alright next to my paper white sister28. Who are you most comfortable around?Myself. Or my good friend Emily Mac, the @keepingitreluctant that you all know and love29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?One, and boy that was a fucking nightmare of a time.30. Do you ever want to get married?Not really? I mean, tax benefits are nice but I don’t care for it much.31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?Nah, or at least it’s the shittiest ponytail ever, though my hair is the longest it’s probably ever been.32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?I’d take a spin with pretty much anyone because dang most of them are hella good looking plus all that money you could earn through scandalous details afterwards. 33. Spell your name with your chin.zxzbnldyu. Perfect, nailed it. Funnily enough it’s pronounced ‘Ashley’34. Do you play sports? What sports?I played, emphasis on the ‘ed’, soccer (football) and tennis and fencing!35. Would you rather live without TV or music?TV, easy. I listen to music way more than I watch TV.36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?Who hasn’t? Though I have an awful habit of fallin in love with folks when I see them if they catch my eye. All the time. Everyone just looks so dang good and cute.37. What do you say during awkward silences?I’m more of a creator of awkward silences than an ender. Yay for being bad at simple conversation.38. Describe your dream girl/guy?Aw jeez. I mean I’m tempted to earn brownie points by just describing my lovely girlfriend. But if I had to draw up an ideal, I guess just a real sweet cutie who’s down for cuddling and playing games, preferably nice and short, all adorable and fun sized! Short hair is a plus.39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?I don’t shop often. So I guess Robinsons bookshop, EB games and Zing? is that the name of that store filled with ‘nerdy’ junk that’s like partnered with EB?40. What do you want to do after high school?Fuck man I went through high school not knowing and I still have no idea41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?I give so many second chances. Multiple. But it does depend on the action. If you hurt me, no matter how much or how often, I’ll let it slide (possibly because I have 0 self respect) but if you fuck with my mates or are just a despicable person in general I will only give you a couple chances.42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?I’m almost always pretty quiet. but if i go silent mid conversation it probably means I’m trying to turn something that just got said into a really lame dad joke.43. Do you smile at strangers?yes and no. If I’m interacting with them or like they pass by and its only the two of us I’ll happily put on a (hopefully not creepy) smile but I won’t have a smile plastered on my face walking through a crowd.44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?Space. Definitely. 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?At the moment, the need to get to work46. What are you paranoid about?People finding out about the murders This and that, usual dark secrets.47. Have you ever been high?Yup and it was eh, I laughed at all sorts of junk but I got serious cottonmouth and had all sorts of gaps in my memory, even worse than normal which was scary.48. Have you ever been drunk?Plenty of times and I think I’m probably 50/50 on if i threw up or not.49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?Recently? I did get Maccas for dinner and pretend that I wasnt hungry when I got home after a rough day at workLess recently I fucked up in a life changing way that no one else knows of and I don’t know what to do about that.50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?Black51. Ever wished you were someone else?Again, who hasn’t? 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?Add a couple zeros to the end of my bank balance would be nice. But physically? Clean up my fucking back. 53. Favourite makeup brand?Afraid I really don’t know anything about any of them enough to make a judgement call. 54. Favourite store?Zing (im sticking with that name, fuck it) is fun to just chill in55. Favourite blog?God so many, you are all too great!56. Favourite colour?Turquoise 57. Favourite food?A good steak is hard to turn down58. Last thing you ate?Rice and mince.59. First thing you ate this morning?A caramel Up&Go to wash down some pills.60. Ever won a competition? For what?I’m more of a second place kinda person. Or was. It’s all been going downhill for a while in academic or sporting respect.61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?I almost got suspended/expelled after a particularly nasty and widespread tidbit rumour went around about me.62. Been arrested? For what?Nope.63. Ever been in love?I think so. I’m the kinda guy to say it pretty early. 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?Uh, I took my girlfriend of the time out to a roller skating rink, I couldn’t skate for shit and I couldnt look her in the eyes without turning away and blushing. Let alone hold a conversation. But afterwards she was kind enough to deign to grant me a kiss in the parking lot.65. Are you hungry right now?Nope, I’m good.66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?I talk to you guys just as much as them nowadays. But I would say I’m closer to them than anyone on tumblr, no offense. 67. Facebook or Twitter?Uh I have both but don’t use them.68. Twitter or Tumblr?Tumblr hands down, this is like my only social network platform69. Are you watching tv right now?Nope70. Names of your bestfriends?Emma, Emily, Hayley, Imogen, Lucinda, Ebony71. Craving something? What?Getting intimate with a guy, just accepting my bisexuality recently has kinda kicked that into overdrive. And now I’m blushin.72. What colour are your towels?We’ve got white, black and turquoise72. How many pillows do you sleep with?One73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?Not in about 10 years.74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?I wouldnt have a clue how many stuffed animals from when I was younger are still tucked away in the house75. Favourite animal?Meerkat.76. What colour is your underwear?Black77. Chocolate or Vanilla?Vanilla78. Favourite ice cream flavour?probably vanilla79. What colour shirt are you wearing?Black80. What colour pants?No pants!81. Favourite tv show?Brooklyn Nine Nine or Bojack Horseman82. Favourite movie?Iron Giant? Road to El Dorado? Spaceballs? Something nostalgic83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?There’s a second?84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?Mean Girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?Uh, fuck I dont remember the names. The lovely lesbian lass. She was great.86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?Bruce.87. First person you talked to today?My girlfriend88. Last person you talked to today?Verballly, my mum, text wise, my girlfriend89. Name a person you hate?Donald Motherfuckign Trump, I mean hating trump is as common as breathing air as it should be but man he’s such a fucking disgusting cunt.90. Name a person you love?My parents.91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?God I have spent many an hour dreaming of socking Trump right in that bullshit spewing mouth92. In a fight with someone?Not currently. Or at least, the feud is still open and so old it isn’t a fight anymore.93. How many sweatpants do you have?Two?94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?Two?95. Last movie you watched?Moana 96. Favourite actress?Ellen Page is up there for sure97. Favourite actor?Chris Pratt98. Do you tan a lot?Ha, most of my body isnt aware what the sun is99. Have any pets?Boy do I. 2 cats and 5 dogs. 10 chooks.100. How are you feeling?A tad tired.101. Do you type fast?Pretty average 102. Do you regret anything from your past?HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA My memory is a whole lot of regrets floating in a void of forgotten moments.103. Can you spell well?W-E-L-L104. Do you miss anyone from your past?A past best friend of mine.105. Ever been to a bonfire party?I’ve hosted a couple and been invited to one106. Ever broken someone’s heart?I doubt it. Not exactly the type. (devastatingly good looking and/or callous)107. Have you ever been on a horse?Yup, wasn’t the thing for me108. What should you be doing?Sleeping?109. Is something irritating you right now?Well I’m now being inundated by regretful thoughts so that’s a bother.110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?Nah. 111. Do you have trust issues?I feel like this was already asked. But yeah, I would say so.112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?I haven’t cried in literal years. I don’t have a clue.113. What was your childhood nickname?It’s always just been Ash114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?Yup, I’ve been all over the place115. Do you play the Wii?I have, but its been a hot minute116. Are you listening to music right now?Yeah, I had Let’s Face It I’m Cute up for the link and it just played a whole bunch of electroswing music on youtube, now on The Noisy Freaks by Freak Orchestra at least I think thats the name and band, I’ve never heard it before117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?sure118. Do you like Chinese food?Probably not my favorite, but it’s nice119. Favourite book?Too many man, way too many. 120. Are you afraid of the dark?Not really.121. Are you mean?I don’t think so. I’m a weak willed pushover and generally benign and quiet122. Is cheating ever okay?Ugh, it’s not exactly commendable but like anything, it’s all circumstance123. Can you keep white shoes clean?I have white runners, which remain clean by the virtue of me never exercising.124. Do you believe in love at first sight?Not actually, but like i said before I get infatuated on sight all the time.125. Do you believe in true love?Not really.126. Are you currently bored?Buddy, my existence is being bored.127. What makes you happy?my pets.128. Would you change your name?I wanted to change my name to Seth when I was younger after years of “ashley is a girls name’ 129. What your zodiac sign?L1BR4130. Do you like subway?Yeah. it’s normally pretty tasty.131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?I mean, I’m currently dating and so is she so that would be a mess, but I doubt much would come of it.132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?Ok im 90000% sure this was already asked.133. Favourite lyrics right now?“No matter what I conjure it could not help me deflect/ The angry death, of every hopeful thought/ that I might be a lover or a fighter…”134. Can you count to one million?I suppose I could. Like I have the capacity. But I’d get bored and give the fuck up without good reason to do so135. Dumbest lie you ever told?fuck me, I lie, alot, it’s my go to defense. Which is bad. but whatever. Probably the one where I skipped tennis training and claimed that I was going to extra french lessons instead, which was immediately called out by the French teacher.136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?Closed. keep the cat in and the dogs out137. How tall are you?175 ish cms, which is 5��10″ i think138. Curly or Straight hair?Straight, despite threats of it getting curly should I let it get longer than a college cut.139. Brunette or Blonde?Wait is this asking preferences. fuck. Uh, Brunette? I’m not fussed by hair colour. though I’d probably avoid redheads just because my mum and one sister are redheads 140. Summer or Winter?WINTER141. Night or Day?Night142. Favourite month?October? it’s got my birthday!143. Are you a vegetarian?Nope144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?Milk145. Tea or Coffee?meh, not fussed either way146. Was today a good day?sure! I got to start work 2/3 hours later than normal after a fucking killer three days.147. Mars or Snickers?Mars? I dont eat a lot of either148. What’s your favourite quote?I dont really have one off-hand149. Do you believe in ghosts?not really.150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “Captain Thomas Kelly, from the forty-sixth Precinct, said; ‘It looks accidental. Grant may have suspected that his familiarity with Damien place him above danger, but a hungry python does not quibble about such niceties’”I know its more than a line, but that’s a hilarious quote.

#long post #long as fuck post #ask list #spaceoutdreamer #ask

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flauntpage · 5 years

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Garbage Game – Observations from Blazers 130, Sixers 115

When you get booed off of your home floor four times in one game, it probably wasn’t your day.

The Sixers were atrocious on Saturday afternoon, and that’s putting it mildly. They couldn’t defend, couldn’t rebound, couldn’t get a loose ball, and couldn’t shoot the three. The personnel decisions were questionable and the effort was worse. It was one of those games you’d like stricken forever from your memory, like when the Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones use that mind-eraser thing from Men in Black and you instantly forget that aliens exist.

By far, the biggest disappointment Saturday was on the glass, where the Sixers conceded 19 offensive boards. Jake Layman had 6 himself, a career high in 28 minutes off the bench. Portland didn’t even shoot all that well, just 5-23 from three, but the combination of Enes Kanter and Jusuf Nurkic working pick and rolls just annihilated a Joel Embiid-less Philly team that ended up allowing 66 points in the paint and 19 second chance points.

Which brings us to the center position:

There’s no reason for Amir Johnson to be in the game. None at all.

He was a -10 in four minutes on the floor, getting posterized on the defensive end before chucking up an air ball three point attempt on the ensuing offensive possession. Johnson had not played in an NBA game since January 26th and was coming off a Friday night in which he went down to Delaware just to get some run. Jonah Bolden, who played eight first-half minutes spelling Boban Marjanovic, didn’t return to the floor until garbage time.

Brett Brown said several things about that after the game, beginning with a question from Rich Hofmann, who asked if the rebounding disparity was why he went with Johnson in the second half.

Brown:

It was Rich, and big ball wasn’t getting it done either. They had 14 offensive rebounds in the first half. I tried to look at Amir to see if that could help with some rebounding stuff. And it didn’t. When you try that sort of combination and that too didn’t work, big ball didn’t work. We really didn’t fix much with Amir. My instinct is, when the game is clearly leaving us, that I’m going small. We’re gonna switch stuff and I’m gonna try to speed it up and hunt threes. It still hurt us, but I think they only had five offensive rebounds (in the second half). Big ball hurt us. Really, as it relates, we can’t connect the dots with small ball and offensive rebounding, that’s not true. So yes, to your point, why did we, it was for those reasons.

The Sixers small look featured Mike Scott playing the five, and it’s true that the rebounding disparity didn’t change via the small or big look, but the defense and effort was pretty poor throughout.

I asked Brett if had any thought on going back to Jonah Bolden in the second half:

I mean it gets to a stage where I made a decision to go with Amir over Jonah. Most of that was driven for I hoped defensive rebounding purposes. When we went back with Amir, the game escaped us a little bit more than we had hoped, and at that stage, I felt like the small ball environment was going to be our best chance.

Follow up question:

Was there a part of him that thought about the fact that Amir hasn’t played an NBA game in almost a month?

Brett:

A little bit. But I also sat and watched him play courtside down in the G-League last night and I thought he looked good. I respected his effort. When you’re searching without Joel and you’re reminded of what Amir has done in the past, I’m not afraid to try to resurrect a 13-year NBA veteran. I’m not intimidated by the fact that he has not played the quantity of NBA games. I hold zero regret of giving him that chance.

I thought that was a forceful quote, and I get it. You trust the veteran to come back and pick up where he left off. I think that shows a lot of respect from coach to player.

However, I’m in the camp of people who believes that Amir just does not have anything left in the tank. He’s 31 now and playing his 14th year in the league. When your legs go, they go, and there’s a reason he came out of the rotation 20 some odd games into the season. Don’t go back on that now unless you absolutely have to.

Yes, I know Jonah Bolden has his rookie deficiencies, and this was a tough matchup for Boban Marjanovic, who can’t slide laterally in pick and roll defense like a more mobile big, but I just can’t come up with a reason why Amir Johnson should have been in that game. I would have preferred to see 23 year old Bolden get obliterated vs 31 year old Johnson getting obliterated. One guy is just beginning his career and could use the learning experience. The other is nearing retirement.

Derek Bodner asked about Bolden and the balance between the rookie learning curve vs. just having a tough matchup against two good bigs in Nurkic and Kanter:

Brett:

I think a lot of it is completely the newness of all this stuff we’re going through. I really do. I think as a simple example, when we’re in pick and roll defense, how many times can you not let the roller get behind you. Can you collapse and absorb the drive, and at some point in that charge circle area make a decision? He’s so bouncy and he wants to come up and it’s a lob fest with rollers going behind him. I think that type of newness and rookie side of Jonah stands out. What I expect from him going forward, I’m not sure. We’re studying this and feeling this. We ‘get’ Joel, and then it’s ‘now what?’ We went through the evolution of Amir, then in the playoffs we had Ersan. We went small. Ersan was our backup five. What does that mean for this year’s group? I don’t know. I’m sharing the experience because that’s ultimately where you have to make the decision to grow the team, guessing where you will end up…

I was gonna cut some video, but I don’t see the point. This was a forgettable game, a bad matchup with the Sixers missing their best player. If we do a sidebar on pick and roll defense, we’ll revisit this game and pull 4-5 clips as an example of what not to do. Plus, it’s Saturday night, and most people are doing more important things than reading about a shitty Sixers loss.

Other notes:

Saturday was Franklin’s birthday. Happy birthday, Franklin.

T.J. McConnell enters the game, very first play is a steal off an inbound pass and run out for a layup. I thought that energy might help kick start a sluggish team, but it really didn’t.

Terry Stotts reminds of that Nate Duncan guy who does the nightly NBA commentary on Twitter.

The Sixers couldn’t fight through a screen to save their life on Saturday. It was like watching an undersized linebacker trying to shed a Mike Alstott lead block.

Ben Simmons took two early jumpers in this game. He missed both.

JJ Redick had another bad outing, just 1-10 from the floor.

I’ll leave you with this:

“You talk a lot of shit for being ass. Be fuckin’ quiet. You talk a lot.” – Ben Simmons getting SPICY pic.twitter.com/DTORSTO7SF

— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) February 23, 2019

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613526362 · 6 years

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Up in the sky

These are the facts, as they happened.

It had been about an hour and a half since we took off, and they'd served dinner, which I ate with satisfaction prior to brushing my teeth. I had finally put on my ear muffs and covered my head with a blanket, after taking two hydroxyzine to help me fall asleep. As I was drifting in the direction of sleep, I heard on the overhead, "There is a passenger in need of medical assistance. If you have medical training and can assist, please proceed to the back of the plane."

First I pulled the blanket off my head. Next I pulled off my ear muffs. I thought for a second, and then looked around. Considering doctors are a dime a dozen in the developing African nation we just left from, I expected to see 20 people standing up and proceeding to the back of the plane.

No one.

Alright, here we go, I thought.

Upon arriving to the back area of the plane, where the attendants prepare food, I found a 40-year old female missionary sitting on one of the flight attendant's pull down chairs, with several of her missionary lady friends surrounding her. There was also what appeared to be a doctor who had responded from first class to come help. I listened in for a second, and was able to gather that the patient ("Grace") had been feeling nauseas a couple hours before the flight, and upon boarding, became vomiting repeatedly and having diarrhea too.

I discussed the case with the doctor. When the doctor said, "If we had some zofran," I said, "I have some." Before I could go get it though, one of the flight attendants suddenly produced a first aid kit in a long metal box.

At around that time, another flight attendant I did not recognize suddenly appeared, looked at me, and said, "She's a doctor," pointing at the African doctor. I immediately responded to her, "Yes. I am too."

We broke the seal on the first aid kit, and opened it.

Quite the curious hodgepodge of items that medical kit was. There were odd non-sterile bandages with "Made in China. Guaranteed sterile" on them, drugs that the doctor and I had never even heard of before, syringes without needles, and quite a few other items equally perplexing. There was an inventory list too, which stated "injectable promethazine" was supposedly included inside. While we began the search for the promethazine, I mentioned that promethazine is an extremely dangerous drug, and can lead to extreme necrosis if not properly administered deep IM or IV.

Luckily, we didn't find the injectable promethazine.

Shortly after I grabbed the oral zofran from my bag, the head flight attendant started asking us if we needed to do an emergency landing.

I had already talked to the patient, checked skin turgor, asked her about when she last urinated, and how dry her mouth was.

I looked at the doctor while answering the flight attendant, as if for consensus, and stated that I thought we could try to manage the patient for now, without any drastic measures. We could try doing oral rehydration and zofran. I mean, where were we going to do an emergency landing right now, Libya?

Apparently one of the missionary friends of the patient was a nurse, and she spoke up to state as much. She asked if we had any IV fluids in the kit. Yes, we replied, but only 500cc. We would try to manage with zofran by mouth first.

About the time that we had come to that conclusion, the patient started losing consciousness.

The doctor and I immediately looked at each other and said, "Ok. IV fluids."

I then addressed the nurse and the doctor and said, "So which one of us is best at IV catheters?"

For the nurse, that seemed to be a call to action. She said, "I got it. Give me the fluids and the line."

I told her I would help her out, as I'm also a Paramedic. I was shuffling through the equipment trying to find what we needed, noting what we didn't have as I compiled supplies. "Don't have a tourniquet," I mentioned in passing. "Okay, we can cut a glove in half and use that," replied the doctor. We discussed IV sizes for a moment, and eventually I handed her a 20 gauge IV. After we found the alcohol preps, she began the IV placement process as I looked for tape to tape the IV.

When eventually I compiled all the IV secural supplies, I looked over at the nurse.

Things didn't look good.

She was inserting a bare IV needle into the patient's R hand vein.

First, I said, "So, you're going to put a 20 in the hand?" She replied, "Yes, I do this all the time."

I said, "Ok, I guess we can put 500cc through the hand. But you don't have a catheter on the needle."

She said, "I thought we'd just do a straight stick."

I didn't continue to mention that the needle inside an IV catheter is actually way too small diameter to actually give fluids through, and the only purpose of it is to confirm placement of the IV in a vein by showing a "flash of blood."

As her "attempt" failed, I thought to myself, "Oh shit. I'm the only one on this plane who can do this shit."

I grabbed another 20 and tied the glove high up on the arm to look at the AC. First, I could palpate it well. I said, "She's got a good AC."

The doctor thought to mention that I didn't have gloves on, which isn't all that abnormal for me. I said it was okay.

Then the glove-tourniquet popped off, and I couldn't palpate anything the next time I tied it.

Finally, "Ok, I feel it again."

I went in.

Nothing, no flash.

Shit.

Dug around a bit.

Nothing, no flash.

Doctor, nurse, two missionary friends, patient, three flight attendants all watching, hoping I can get it.

Nothing.

I palpate the vein again, and its several mm medial to wear I am.

All turbulence must have led to some patient movement, and I was in the wrong spot. I could move through the subnormal space to get over there, but it was a long shot.

I tried, and I got flash. I was in the vein.

Trying to advance the catheter off the needle, it wouldn't advance completely. All of a sudden things didn't look as good. Too late though, because I'd already said out loud, "I got it." Had to make it work now.

Pulling the needle all the way out and leaving the catheter in place, I put the needle in a sharps container and noted no blood was flowing out - meaning it wasn't in the vein. I retracted it a bit, and sure enough, blood flow.

All over my hands.

It was in, but just barely.

I held the IV steady against the patient's arm, as the nurse hooked up the IV fluid line.

I instructed one of the missionary friends to squeeze the saline box - that's right, IV fluids in Africa comes in a box more often than a bag - in order to speed up the infusion. It was slow progress, but after we had infused about 200cc of fluid, the patient's mental status changed, and she even stated out loud that she felt better.

Unfortunately though, the fluid wasn't flowing anymore.

I didn't note any infiltration, so it didn't seem like the IV was bad. We turned our focus to the box and line, and first the nurse uncapped some valve that neither of us had seen on an IV line before. We thought that might be helping initially.

My hands were tied, but next I told the doctor to check the roller clamp. She said, "it's up high, but it seems to just roll when I move it higher."

"That means it's completely unclamped," I told her.

Eventually the nurse suggested positional occlusion, which I had considered but not stated out loud. Moving the patient's arm around a bit, we started to get better flow.

It probably took 45 minutes to infuse 350 cc.

Eventually I had the nurse take over holding the IV in place, because I had noticed a BP cuff in the first aid kit and wanted to check the patient's blood pressure on the other arm.

When I did, I found it to be 92/60. The flight attendant asked, "Is that bad."

The doctor spoke up, saying, "Technically it's within normal range....."

I was thinking, "Bad."

After we finished our IV therapy, the doctor and I put together a treatment plan. Missionary friends had cleared out a row for the patient to lie semi-sitting. The doctor had asked if the patient could lie in first class, but of course, that wasn't happening.

Before we could enact our treatment plan, someone came back and asked for the doctor's help, as another patient had a "severe head ache." Jokingly, I turned to the doctor and said, "This is how it starts. One person gets sick, and then all the other passengers see it and decide they're sick too. I've seen this movie."

The doctor grabbed the blood pressure cuff to go triage our second patient, as I stayed with Grace and told her what the plan was. We're going to have her chew the zofran, and try to sip some fluids, and get some rest.

She was dizzy on owalking, but we guided her back to her row. I was a bit displeased to see the missionaries were lying her down - that's not exactly the position I wanted.

"We don't really want her lying down, so if she vomits, she can breathe it in."

As was happening increasingly, the nurse slighted my advice and stated, "No, I'll keep an eye on her."

Ok fine.

At about that time, I returned to the back and found the African doctor. She asked me what specialty I was in and where I practiced. I said, "Emergency medicine." She said, "Oh wonderful. I'm an internist, so this isn't my specialty."

She disappeared, and I never saw her again.

Less than an hour later, Grace was vomiting again. She vomited all the fluid that the nurse had coached her to sip and a bit more, probably 150 cc. Grace said to me, "It feels like bile." I looked at the vomit and said, "Some of it is bile, but regardless, you're losing fluid, and we don't want that."

That was the end of hour four. It was an 8 hour flight.

Grace's blood pressure held for hour five, and six, and we administered several more doses of zofran.

As her BP's continued to hold just above 100, I instructed the nurse to keep having Grace sip water whenever her nausea level was less than 6/10 - in coordination with our zofran doses. The nurse pushed back. I said, "It's the bacteria that's causing her to need to vomit, not the water." The nurse said, "Yes, but the water isn't helping."

I tried to be patient with the nurse and explain on multiple occasions (I was visiting the patient every 30 minutes or so, taking her vitals by putting my watch on her wrist as a heart rate monitor and doing a manual BP), that the patient had lost a lot of volume, and we had only placed 500cc of it.

She was in a very fragile state, even if it didn't seem like it. Nonetheless, the patient was resting, so I let her rest. I communicated that I was hesitant to dose her at more than one zofran per hour - which was already way too much considering this was the 8mg zofran tablets.

At hour five of the flight, things took a turn for the worse when Grace started having severe diarrhea again. She went into the bathroom and flushed three times.

I took Grace's blood pressure again, and it had dropped precipitously. 88/54.

She was now hypotensive. Her heart rate was also over 100, as the heart tried to compensate for the lack of volume.

I looked at the nurse and her young missionary accompany, and I said, "This is a very unique situation. Not having the medication you need."

I looked down, and thought. Then I looked up at Grace, and, speaking very softly, I said, "Grace we just gave you a Zofran 40 minutes ago. I know your nausea is a 7/10, but I'm going to have to have you take another Zofran, so that you can drink some water. As a doctor, I know exactly how much fluid is in your arteries and veins right now, and it's not good. We have to replace some of that."

Before Grace could take my next Zofran, she was back in the bathroom again having more diarrhea. When she came back out, she was in and our of consciousness.

I had put up with the nurse's bullshit enough, and now I was taking charge. "She's goning to stay right here. We're going to do another zofran. And in 10 minutes were going to start pushing fluids. Otherwise, we're going to wind up right back where we started, and this time we won't even have 500cc of fluids to save us."

And that's what we did.

One of the flight attendants who was hovering asked if we should give her some Sprite.

"No, the sugar makes diarrhea worse. What she really needs is Pedialite, but I doubt anyone has any."

Someone mentioned as an aside that we could put some salt in her water. I said okay, we'll do that (I'm usually not opposed to something that is sound and can't hurt). When the flight attendant brought.a couple packets of salt over, the young missionary girl opened one up and started to pour it in the water.

"No," I said. "Don't bother. It will just sink to the bottom." Then, I had Grace protrude her tongue, and I poured salt on her tongue, after which she drank some water. I was sincerely hoping it wouldn't cause her to vomit, and I guess since we had so much zofran on board, it didn't."

Another flight attendant appeared and handed me a vomit bag to write on. "Can you please write what is going on with the patient so the pilot can radio the tower."

I wrote,

"Hypotensive patient. Losing consciousness. Severely dehydrated."

Then, I thought for a second, and realized I hadn't really followed traditional medical report formatting. So I added,

"40-year old female. Severe nausea and vomiting."

Alright, that spruced things up.

I read it to the nurse, and she seemed to agree with me that what I wrote was a pretty concise and accurate depiction of things.

As we neared landing, we moved Grace back to a row and had her sit up so we could buckle her in for landing. I sat next to Grace, and as I monitored her level of consciousness and pulse, I finished up a report I was writing in my notebook to give to the paramedics when we arrived in Dublin. It was mostly her demographic info, allergies and medical conditions (none), and a narrative followed by vital signs.

The chief flight attendant came over and let us know that paramedics would be coming onto the plane. They would need to do their own assessment, the flight attendant said. "Of course. That's fine." I said. "But I need you to make sure that there aren't all sorts of people standing in the isle blocking their way," I replied. She said, "Of course. No one wills and."

As we landed, I took the stethoscope back from the nurse, who had been holding it for me. I put it around my neck and said, "This will make me look a bit more official."

After we landed, the flight attendants read a message that literally said, "Thank you for choosing Easet African Airlines for your flight today. Whether your final destination is the Big City or you're continuing on, we thank you for your loyalty."

That's when I realized the flight attendants were going to do a crew change, and those with me now were probably most interested in getting the hell out of there.

And that's about how it went. I walked up front to the door, and repeatedly asked the flight attendants to have all the passengers sit. At one point a man even charged up to me with his bag, and said, "Big City?"

No, she informed him, we're not in the Big City yet.

The young missionary girl came to the front, and I told her, "Get these people out of the isle. I'm about to yell at all of them in 30 seconds here."

She tried to, but it's hard persuading Africans sometimes.

The door was opened, and immediately outside I saw workers from the Dublin crew. I couldn't tell who was EMS, so I started hinting at them and saying, "Are you a paramedic? Are you a medic?" NO, no, they said.

They pointed down at the end of a set of stairs that had been attackhed to the door, and I saw an ambulance. I saw what I thought might be too paramedics still sitting int he carin.

It seemed a natural connection of dots for me to hop out the door and head down to give them report and accompany them up, but when I did, the flight attendants immediately yelled at me, "No, no, come back. You cannot walk out there."

Sure were better at keeping people off the starts then out of the isle.

I checked the isle once more, and I saw a lot of people still in the isle.

I started yelling. Oh shit. I'm yelling on a plane.

About that time, I realized they were actually bringing Grace to me.

Probably not a bad idea.

Grace arrived, and almost immediately thereafter, the Paramedics were at the door. I addressed the one who arrived first, and gave report. He said, "So it looks like she needs a visit to the hospital and some IV fluids."

I said, "Yes, definitely. Can you give her some fluids en route to the hospital."

"No," he said. "We don't do IV fluids here. WE could give some zofran, but sounds like you've already done that."

Oh wow.

While I was hoping things were over, they weren't.

This was supposed to be a re-fuelign stop and passengers weren't supposed to be leaving the plane. Grace, and the missionary who had been elected to go with her, were having their passports and tickets analyzed and photographed.

Geez, come on.

As the EMS team and I wanted, I handed my report to them.

Finally, I looked at the official inspecting the documents, and I said, "Can she go."

"Yes, yes," he said.

And she went.

That was that.

---

De-planing, I went up to the pilot and told him the first aid kit needs to be restocked. He discussed the incident with me a bit.

He asked if they took down my name and email address and phone number. I said, "Yes. I hope I don't get in trouble." He said, "Well you never know, you might get a free ticket to Wakanda."

I would like that, I said. I would like that a lot.

0 notes

iannoyinglysweetstudent-blog · 6 years

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traveler auto insurance quotes

How much do you think my insurance will go up?

I got a ticket about a month ago for exhibition of speed and i have court soon but i need to know how much my insurance will go up after our next policy. it wasnt a serious ticket it was just me and my buddy racing from one stop light to the next one. we didnt even go over the limit. i might even get off with nothing because its my first ticket i dunno. but ya, i have alstate and its insured under my parents name and we have our cars, 4 wheelers, snowmobiles, cabin, house, life, and pretty much everything with allstate. its about 600 every 6 months currently for my car. about how much do you think it will go up? thank you.""

SAS resume for insurance companies?

i need to make a sas resume for insurance companiy.can anyone help with what to write in work experience describing experience in an insurance company setup.

How much would car insurance cost for me?

How much does it cost to get my first car insurance under my parents insurance living in NV, USA? Also: I'm 18 yrs old, Just got my driver's license, White male Caucasian, Drive a black 1996 Honda Civic, been in no accidents, got good grades from High School, had no bad records in general, I live in a safe area, but will drive about 80 miles a week .""

My husband needs life insurance but has diabeties?

My husband needs life insurance about 50,000 but want payments cheap payments 40.00 monthly. We been trying to find some life insurance but some dont take with diabeties. My husband doesnt take insulin. Hes ranging about 100 to 180 every month on sugar level.. Any ideas on life insurance we should quilified!!!""

How do you find another person's insurance carrier for an auto accident?

Recently my car was parked on the side of a street. A car pulled up behind it, and caught fire. There was extensive damage to the rear of my car. The person who owned the car was nowhere to be found, and there was no insurance information in the car. The officers on the scene provided me with the registered owners name, address and license plate number. The officer suspected the car may have been stolen, but wasn't certain (The RO of the car lived a few towns over). I do not believe I am liable for this accident. Is there any way to track down this person's insurance company for me to get covered in this incident? I don't have comprehensive coverage, so my company isn't going to cover the damage. Is the fact that the car was possibly stolen an issue? Thanks very much!""

What will happen if I drive without insurance for few days?

I live in New Jersey, my county is Hudson county. I just bought my car yesterday afternoon my insurance company was closed. I could not call them to add the car on insurance and start driving with my other car insurance. What will happen if I drive with my other car insurance in my new car for a few days? What if cops stop me? Will I get a ticket or something else?""

Insuring A Range Rover For An 18 Year Old?

Ive been driving for a year now, and i have 1 year no claims bonus. (aged 18 and male). I am going to university for three years, and for the first of those three years, im NOT on the insurance. How much do you think a Rangerover sport (second hand costing about 9,000) would be costing me in UK insurance third-party? my current car was fitted with this mileage thing, which also lessens the amount i pay (NOT A BALCK BOX).. but roughly do you know? thanks.""

Where is the best website to compare pco insurance prices?

fully comprehensive i would like a quote straight away. some websites you give all the details and it says that the company will contact the person regarding the quote. i want to compare mini cab insurance not taxi insurance. thank you so much in advance. :)

Life insurance for police officers?

Can police officers get extended life insurance to cover death on the job? If so, how much - 5 million?""

Do I need to pay insurance on a SORN car?

Hi if i declare my car SORN (UK) do i need to pay insurance or MOT?

Car insurance help?!?

Can I purchase car insurance and not own a vehicle? The reason I ask is because lately I've been renting vehicles and they charge for insurance, by request. I figure since I use rental service often that I could go ahead and get low price insurance. Any ideas?""

Cheap dental insurance?

hello, im looking for cheap dental insurance and i live in florida, anyone know.............???""

List of life and health insurance companies with medical exam?

Buy a car + insurance?

Hi i live in Toronto and i was looking to buy a car, the thing is i just recently moved to Canada and have no experience of this stuff, i didn't own an auto mobile back home. I also don't have that many reliable and truly trust able friends that i can turn to for help, and no relatives. So i turn to yahoo answers in my time of need. I need to know what the process of buy a car is and when and how do i get insurance on my car, I just turned 18 and would like my own car. And do you guys gave any suggestions for first cars? any tips? all help is appreciated.""

What is the best health insurance?

Hi! I have been trying to find an affordable health insurance company. I am young and in good health. I am a nanny and am not offered health insurance. At my husband's job they ...show more

How do I get back a revoked license in Colorado without owning a car or having car insurance?

When I had my license revoked for DWAI in Colorado, I was told that I could get my license back when a year was over by submitting an SR-22 form. The way I understand it, you can't get an SR-22 form unless you have car insurance. Is this correct? I don't have a car or car insurance, so how do I get my license back?""

Insurance when renting a car? Waste of $$?

I'm 22 yrs old, renting a car from enterprise in 5 wks. On a budget and trying to cut costs, was wondering if the insurance they offer is really necessary, or just a waste of money. I currently have progressive insurance on my vehicle. Can I add this rental to my insurance for a cheaper rate? Or is insurance even an absolute MUST. Realistically, how often is it actually used? Any answers would help! 10 pts""

Do older cars cost more for insurance? I was thinking of getting a bmw m3 2002 or 05.?

or for my 1st car should i just get a infinity? cus someone told me for those cars insurance is like 220 a month!!

How much do you pay for car insurance and on what company?

Im tryign to find the cheapest.

Price of car insurance 18 years old?

The cheapest quote for car insurance I have had is 5000 for a 1.0L Toyota Yaris, TPFT, kept in a garage overnight, the car is only worth 1000. Am I doing something wrong?? 5000 is just rediculous, Im not even going to bother with lessons yet. What is/was your insurance cost for this age?""

Qualify for state car insurance?

Hello; I'm moving to Virginia soon from New York. I know car insurance there is cheaper, but I hear that you have to live in the state for 6 months to qualify for the state car insurance. For example, I can buy a new car once I move in Virginia. With the new car I should be qualified for the Virginia car insurance?""

What could i expect to pay for insurance being a first time driver?

Hi, im looking to buy my first car with some money im getting from school; it will be used of course but i would like to know if anyone can give me insight on insurance costs. I will soon be 21 years old, have had a license for about a year and a half, and i have one accident on my record (possibly) that happened almost a year ago while driving my sister's car; and i was not listed on thier insurance as a driver does that make a difference? With all that being said how much could i expect to pay for insurance? Oh and i live in Philadelphia,PA if that helps with answers. Also what additional fees should i expect to encounter outside of insurance? Thanks!""

How does car insurance work?

im sure this is a really dumb question, but dont know the first thing about car insurance. I'll be 19 next month & i'm going to get my license before this month is over. I've had my permit for almost 2 yrs now & just been waiting to get money saved up for a car & insurance. I'd like an SUV but i've heard that it costs more to have insurance on an SUV? is this true? Are there any specific cars that are better [meaning less expensive] to get insurance on?""

Any suggestion for an auto insurance?

I'm currently under geico but I realized that they charge me too much.Do you know any auto insurance that is cheaper?

2003 350z or new altima coupe? (insurance costs)?

I'm an 18 years old male. What's the smaller of the two evils and by approximately how much? The 350z would be the enthusiast trim and the coupe would be S trim. Both automatic

traveler auto insurance quotes

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/florida-condo-insurance-online-quote-adam-rose/"

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itdisneymatter · 7 years

Text

Day 09 - Seaworld & Universal

TLDR: Seaworld this morning. Lunch pretty much inside a Shark aquarium. Amazing experience! Hit a few Roller Coasters including Manta which we've done before and Kraken which we haven't. Met some penguins and seen Killer Whales and Dolphins do all sorts of clever stuff. Finished up in Seaworld. Started Universal Studios. Done some Simpsons stuff, Robert won a ball, I won MIB (again) and we rounded things off with Escape from Gringott’s and buying wands in Diagon Alley. Absolutely packed day but it was excellent!

It seems like as time goes on, it's a little more difficult to wake up each day, especially sleepy-head Grace who proclaimed she was awake during the night and only got ONE minute of sleep! :P What I will say is even with the 17hr days, the weather and the rest does make a difference and makes you feel a whole lot better in general - I've been suffering from intermittent headaches of late, but haven't really had any since I left.

We're just on our own today for Seaworld so no pickups required (which means no coffee unfortunately :( ) , and as Seaworld is not far down the road, we were in the park within about 30 minutes of leaving the room. We picked up a big litre cup with unlimited refills for around 20 bucks when we got in the park. Not only does it do free refills but it does free Icee refills (which is kinda like Iceblasts) so for this alone I would pay double. The cup had lots of facts and figures on it too like Mako, the longest and fastest roller coaster in Orlando, to reach speeds of 73mph and heights or around 200ft... :| Yeah I'll maybe pass on that one thanks.

We were a littler later to the park that intended so we headed for the Sharks Encounter, the restaurant we had booked for lunch. This place had a huge aquarium on the far wall filled with loads of sharks! And Ann got us a table right at the side of the tank - awesome! We got carried away watching the sharks and other fish and taking loads of photos that we forgot at times we were in there to have lunch. And what do the serve at a restaurant which has sharks literally swimming around it? Seafood! When we finally did order, I went for the Lobster Bisque which was a pretty damn good soup (and the best thing I had in there), and some tempura prawns with sticky rice. Ann went for the mussels and then Seafood pasta. Food was pretty good in general - though the kids didn’t seem to have an appetite (well except Patrick I don’t think there is any time he doesn’t have an appetite). The kids still loved it though, due to the amazing views.

Coasters, Cuties & More Coasters

So we had Manta next, which after a huge (HUGE!) lunch, was probably not the best thing to be doing. Patrick & wee GG weren’t in for it so Ann had to take Roller Coaster Robert first, while I waited with the kids then did Child Swap when they returned. It meant Robert go to go twice which he loved (though Patrick was getting bored and may have regretted his decision NOT to ride Manta). I've been on this one before and its brilliant but just as were due to board we were hit with technical difficulties and they had to stop the ride, which when you have a full stomach of seafood, doesn’t fill you with the greatest of confidence. Last row when we finally did board which Robert said was the fastest, and it certainly did go fast, but it was still awesome!

In stark contrast we then visited the wee baby Penguin Puck over at Empire of the Penguin. Easy going ride even if we chose the wild side, and is one of Gracie's favourite rides - she even brought her own wee Penguin cutie (our name for TY Beanies) along for the ride. Nice ride but the highlight is when you finish and you get to meet real life penguins in their own environmental conditions (which is freakin' freezing!).

Now here’s another comparison photo from today...

And fours years ago (on the exact same day as it happens)...

Ain’t she just the cutest??? :D Anyway, The Kraken next, the one I was waiting for - a 3D VR experience on a huge roller coaster (or under the sea in the VR world). Me and Ro on this one and Ann was feeling too well and the other weren’t interested. Essentially all you see and hear is what's on the VR headset you are wearing while at the same time riding an actual coaster through big drops, banks, turns and loops (running at a top speed of 65mph according to my cup). We have a less than used PS VR at home and I love it, so this was going to be fantastic! Or at least I thought. Unfortunately my visuals reset their orientation so I was going one way but being shown another, very disorientating and not a very pleasant experience at all. A little disappointed but Robert had a good time on the ride which is all that matters really.

Its Showtime!

After that we had to run to the other end of the park to reach the Orca show - this one being Ann's pick of the day. A number of Killer Whales doing all sorts of things and really good to see a big push on education about care and conservation of these mammals within the Seaworld programme. Gracie loved this and she was shouting and screaming whenever the Orca and I think she couldn’t have stayed in the same spot for the next few shows.

And once that was done we then crossed to the other end of the park (AGAIN) to catch the the last Dolphin show of the day. Show times really screw with your park flow at times! Slightly different from before as there wasn’t really any birds or high wire stuff to speak of - they just really concentrated on the Dolphins and there were quite a few of them. This time, the family wanted to sit in the Splash zone, which they did, though I opted for a higher vantage, not to avoid the water, well just to avoid the water getting on to my camera. It turned out they didn’t really get soaked which Gracie wasn’t too happy about and she wanted to do it again so she could get bigger splashes!

Homer & Harry

It was late afternoon at that point and we did all of the things we wanted to do, so decided to call it a day. We missed a few animal encounters and one or two of the later shows but as we have free parking ticket we could pop down for a quick visit one evening if we wanted to. We though at that point it would be a good idea to head to Universal Studios (to catch up on a few of the rides we missed the other day), for the last few hours instead of turning in early. It was exceptionally hot today though (over 100 degrees) and no rain for the first time in a while, so we popped back to the hotel room, which was on the way, for a quick shower and change. It was just after 6pm so no parking fee - result, we might just need to do this more often! We got into the park relatively quickly, though there were still loads of folk going in, and went the opposite direction to the way we normally go to hit The Simpsons first. We stopped by Doc Browns train for a quick pic before getting to our destination.

When we go to The Simpsons ride it started raining!!! That's like the third time in a row (including the last visit two eyars ago), when it started raining when we get to this point in the park - its bizarre! The Simpsons sheltered us from most of it which was good as we were only packing my camera and left the rainjackets at the hotel room to save carrying an extra bag. The Simpsons though even though it replaced my most favouritest ever ride - Back To The Future - you cant fault it, hysterical family fun.

With the rain not really coming to anything, though we still had to occasional claps of thunder, we stopped to grab the boys a bite to eat in the form of a Krusty Burger, while I took Grace on Kang & Kudos, a wee fairground type ride going round and round and up and down in spaceships. We were travelling in a spaceship called Citizen Kang (they all had punny names), and Grace was the primary pilot on this one. I also took a nice wee video and a few photos on my phone but got reprimanded while I was on the ride so had to switch it off :(

Before we left The Simpsons land, Robert wanted to have a shot on the Basketball stall. He LOVES basketball and is pretty good at it, even having inherited both his parents shortish genes. Shooting 1-3 hoops got you a specific prize, and he wanted a new Basketball, which was two hoops. BAM! First one went in right off the rim. That's a winner right there! Next one he missed. It was all down to the final ball to get him his preferred prize. We told him to take it calm and line up the shot (like my advice on Basketball is any good, but I need to try). It went up.... and IN! Woot! Well done Roro, he got the ball he wanted and was all happy with himself and so he should be!

Next one was one of my faves, Men In Black! A shooting game were you score points by shooting aliens and win enternal glory among your family. After Toy Story the other day I had this one in the bag though Ann seemed to think she was going to give me a challenge. Well let the scoreboard do the talking shall we? :P

GG: 209,875 (ka-POW! :P)

PG: 20,750

Roro: 19,725

Ann: 11,525

Wee GG: 7425

Our final area was Diagon Alley and we didn’t have a lot of time left before the park closed so managed to get on to Escape from Gringotts which had a low wait time due to the time it was. We were waiting to go in and at that moment the Dragon on top of Gringotts sent out a fireball and Gracie literally jumped out her skin. It was really funny but she didnt think so (Im pretty sure shell laugh at it later ; ) This ride is great and the journey to getting on the ride is equally as great, through the bank, passing goblins and moving painting along the way, getting to see Bill Weasley give a wee intro and then down a huge elevator before putting on the required 3D glasses and boarding the minecart. Special effects match that of Forbidden Journey with a few extra characters inc luding Bellatrix and Voldemort thrown in. A definite ride we will be returning to when we visit the park again in the next few days.

Expelliarmus!

We had been planning to pick up some Harry Potter wands and we had a few minutes before heading home to pop into Ollivander’s which was pretty quiet (its usually not). The kids picked interactive wands this time, and allow they didn’t get an opportunity to use them this evening, well bring them back and do a full afternoon of Harry Potter goodness. We have a few wands already so Gracie opted for Ginny's, Robert her brother Ron & Patrick picked Snape's (without missing a beat). They all got they own wee wands bags and they skipped out of the shop and down Diagon Alley to head for home.

In preparation for a late night blog update (its been a long day), I picked up a Starbucks Toasted Coconut Cold Brew (which tasted real good), as the others popped into Transformars for the last five minutes in the park (I think they were the last ones on for the day).

Still not satisfied with getting to the exit without doing anything else we popped in a wee cult classics shoppy to look at the comics and memorabilia. I opted for Harley Rebirth Vol.1 and Patrick, The Killing Joke Noir - a really really nice book and Patrick go into a Joker lore conversation with the attendant who was even geekier than me. Exhausted we finally reached the exit and through Citywalk and as we passed the Cinema, Robert asked if we could go see the new Despicable Me movie as we missed it the other night. 10:30 at night and he wants to go to the pictures! LOL!

Tomorrow well have our first real water park (finally, say the kids) before heading off to Magic Kingdom in the eve for some Fireworks fun. And Patrick don’t impart any of his wisdom on us today so Ill make sure he gives us double for tomorrow's update! :) See ya.

0 notes

dipulb3 · 4 years

Text

Ikea Fyrtur smart shade review: I'm keeping this thing

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/ikea-fyrtur-smart-shade-review-im-keeping-this-thing-4/

Ikea Fyrtur smart shade review: I'm keeping this thing

Incredible value compared to competitors like Lutron, Somfy and Tilt.

Easy-to-use app covers all of the bases for smart control, grouping and scheduling.

Simple, easy to use voice controls vie Siri, Alexa or the Google Assistant.

Removable, rechargeable lithium-ion battery.

Magnetic wireless remote comes included.

Don’t Like

Totally non-customizable design, available only in gray.

Slightly ugly metal housing.

Gateway device for app and voice controls sold separately.

Mounting screws not included.

No way to manually raise or lower the shades when the battery is dead.

Ry Crist/CNET

The Fyrtur is now

Ikea Fyrtur Smart Shade sizes

Width (inches) 23 27 30 32 34 36 38 48 Price $129 $139 $149 $154 $159 $164 $169 $179

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) June 3, 2020

Each Fyrtur blind comes with a magnetic wireless remote.

Ry Crist/CNET

Smart controls

You’ll need Ikea’s Tradfri Gateway plugged into your router in order to control the blinds from the app or with a voice command. It sells separately for $35.

Ry Crist/CNET

Ikea’s Tradfri app lets you control or automate your blinds from your phone, and it’ll tell you how to connect with a voice assistant, too.

Screenshots by Ry Crist/CNET

If you’re an Apple HomeKit user, you’ll be able to see what percentage the blind’s rechargeable battery is at in the Home app.

Ry Crist/CNET

I’m keeping it

0 notes

dipulb3 · 4 years

Text

Ikea Fyrtur smart shade review: I'm keeping this thing

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/ikea-fyrtur-smart-shade-review-im-keeping-this-thing-2/

Ikea Fyrtur smart shade review: I'm keeping this thing

Incredible value compared to competitors like Lutron, Somfy and Tilt.

Easy-to-use app covers all of the bases for smart control, grouping and scheduling.

Simple, easy to use voice controls vie Siri, Alexa or the Google Assistant.

Removable, rechargeable lithium-ion battery.

Magnetic wireless remote comes included.

Don’t Like

Totally non-customizable design, available only in gray.

Slightly ugly metal housing.

Gateway device for app and voice controls sold separately.

Mounting screws not included.

No way to manually raise or lower the shades when the battery is dead.

Ry Crist/CNET

The Fyrtur is now

Ikea Fyrtur Smart Shade sizes

Width (inches) 23 27 30 32 34 36 38 48 Price $129 $139 $149 $154 $159 $164 $169 $179

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) June 3, 2020

Each Fyrtur blind comes with a magnetic wireless remote.

Ry Crist/CNET

Smart controls

You’ll need Ikea’s Tradfri Gateway plugged into your router in order to control the blinds from the app or with a voice command. It sells separately for $35.

Ry Crist/CNET

Ikea’s Tradfri app lets you control or automate your blinds from your phone, and it’ll tell you how to connect with a voice assistant, too.

Screenshots by Ry Crist/CNET

If you’re an Apple HomeKit user, you’ll be able to see what percentage the blind’s rechargeable battery is at in the Home app.

Ry Crist/CNET

I’m keeping it

0 notes