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#i need to think about normal things but no <3
ktgoodmorning · 12 hours
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"I'm scared"
Alexia Putellas x reader
Part 3 of that awkward smile but also can stand on it's own in my opinion, just kinda in that same universe.
I Part 1 I Part 2 I
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To say you were stressed about the upcoming Chelsea match would have been an understatement. Champions league matches always held more weight to them so you’d always be the first to put an immense amount of pressure on yourself. You were similar to Alexia in that way, always expecting the absolute best from yourself and willing to push yourself to any length necessary to get there, no matter what it took. 
But you were ready. That’s what everyone told you. Barça was incredible and you all knew exactly what you needed to do. You had trained for this and knew how to handle the pressure. 
You did all your pre game rituals, even getting a quick kiss on the forehead from Alexia once the others had left the locker room. They still had no idea the two of you had gotten back together and at the moment you wanted to keep it that way, knowing Mapi would be fiercely protective over both of you, scared to see her best friends hurt each other once again. 
Before you knew it, you were lined up in the tunnel, ready to take the pitch. Mapi was working her way through everyone, giving plenty of pep talks and words of wisdom asshe did so, being sure to make a long stop in front of you.
You were a center back, working hard to fill her shoes in her absence and trying your absolute best. Everyone knew it was a difficult job but you continued to improve and put in the extra hours to make sure you could make her proud. She was always sure to give you some extra advice and hype you up to make sure you knew that she believed in you. You had known Mapi for most of your life and as much as you’d never admit it, her faith in you worked wonders for your confidence and skills on the field. Especially with you still settling in at Barcelona, knowing that she trusted you in her absence made you step up to the plate in a way you hadn’t been able to before. 
As she approached you, Mapi took both your hands in hers, looking at you with a rare sense of seriousness that she often didn’t show. “You’re ready for this, amiga. Just do what you do best, quit thinking about anything else, just go play and be the footballer that you are.” She gave you a short nod which you returned to her before pulling her in for a short hug. Soon afterwards, you were being led onto the pitch for the game to begin. 
As the game got started, you settled into a pace that was much faster than most of the games you were used to. There was much more back and forth, more speed, and more physicality than you normally played with, both teams hungry for a win which only heightened the intensity further.
It was around the 60th minute when a Chelsea player sent a long ball down the field in your direction, hoping to reach Mayra Ramirez. You, being the closest to her, took off running towards her the second the ball started your way, pushing yourself to catch up with her and using your speed to your advantage. You were able to reach the ball just as it was about to arrive at its intended target, immediately jumping up in an attempt to head it away before Mayra could take control of it. 
However just as your feet left the ground, you felt a mind-numbing crack to your temple, clearly coming into contact with something that wasn’t the ball, before immediately collapsing onto the pitch. What you didn’t realize when you tried to take the header, was how close you were to the opposing player who, like you, was jumping up in hopes of getting control over the ball, leading to her head smashing into the side of yours. 
You had little to no awareness of the things going on around you as you layed there, curled in a ball, groaning in pain, wishing you didn’t exist. Pain was shooting through your skull with an intensity that made it hard to even pinpoint its origin. All you knew was that it hurt. 
Everything hurt. The sunlight in your eyes hurt, making you keep them squeezed shut as tightly as possible. Squeezing your eyes shut caused pain too, but not quite as bad as if you had opened them. You didn’t even have the energy or mental capacity to fully react to the amount of pain you were feeling at that moment, just bringing your hands up to your face as if they would somehow shield you from the pain you were feeling, exhausted, tears unknowingly running down your face. 
 Game play stopped almost immediately as you and Mayra had both hit the ground hard, her seeming to be in better shape than you currently were. The second she saw your heads make contact, Alexia felt like her whole world came to a screeching halt. It did. You were her world. You had slowly become ingrained in everything she did as over the last couple months you had been together and now here you were, curled up motionless on the grass. 
She didn’t even realize it but the blonde had begun sprinting towards you the second you went down, not even waiting for the whistle or giving it a second thought. It was automatic for her, the need to protect you outweighing everything else. 
Normally if a teammate went down, Alexia would be the one to argue with the referee about whatever had happened and allow someone else to go comfort the injured player. It’s not like the captain had a reputation for being warm and fuzzy and good with handling people’s emotions. She’d leave that to the others so she could be the stone faced captain she preferred being. But not with you. You were different. 
Alexia was by your side in an instant, suddenly no longer caring who knew about your relationship. Keeping things a secret wasn’t even a thought that crossed her mind as she slid to her knees next to you, instantly grabbing your hand in an attempt to provide you some comfort until the medical staff could reach you. Her hands shook as she brushed some hair off your face and wiped your tears, genuinely terrified of what was going on with you. The blank stare in your eyes, paired with your silence and lack of reaction was eerie to say the least. 
“You’ll be okay, amor, I’ve got you. The physios are almost here.” It’s like time was moving in slow motion, feeling like they were taking forever even though they were just as prompt as they always were. Your girlfriend’s words were almost more for herself than they were for you. The way you still were yet to react, didn’t call for words of comfort, however she needed to say it out loud, just to hear it for herself. You would be okay. You had to be. She was thinking so many things at once that she couldn’t fully process it all, just fully in survival mode on your behalf. 
When the physios reached your side, Alexia moved over to give them some space, still refusing to let go of your hand as they did so. She didn’t notice, but plenty of teammates had given her some weird looks, confused by her sudden concern over you and the way she was expressing it so openly. The look of fear in her eyes was new to everyone, even those she had known her entire life. Nobody had seen the captain looking so unsure of things when she was on the football pitch, normally that was the place where she came across as the most confident no matter what was going on. 
The physios did their job, asking you a million questions and trying to examine you as best they could in your current state. Alexia could hardly pay attention to anything they said, far too caught up in her thoughts about what could be going on with you. 
You were hardly answering any of the questions, just mumbling soft responses here and there, struggling to focus on their words. Because of your continued lack of coherency, the medical staff decided to stretcher you off- something that didn’t help Alexia’s mental state, doing her best to hide the tears that were welling up in her own eyes. She was still yet to let go of your hand, squeezing it tightly as if her hold on your hand alone could keep you safe as she helplessly watched the medical staff load you onto the stretcher.
The blonde stayed by your side as the staff wheeled you off, only stopping when they reached the sideline where Mapi had come down from the stands to wait for you to take Alexia’s place by your side. Alexia knew that she wouldn’t be allowed to come off yet. It was the Champion’s League and everyone knew there wasn’t the wiggle room to mess with the subs more than absolutely necessary. As much as it killed her to see you go without her, she knew she didn’t have another option and at the very least, she was grateful to know Mapi would be by your side the whole time. 
When they paused at the sidelines with you, Alexia took the opportunity to give your hand a tight squeeze before bringing it to her lips to leave a kiss on the back of it. “You’ll be okay amor, I’ll see you as soon as this is over. I love you, okay?” She didn’t expect a response given your current state but appreciated the weak attempt at returning a squeeze of the hand to her. Mapi froze for a second, giving her a look of confusion over what she had just seen from her best friend before giving the captain a reassuring pat on the shoulder and taking Alexia’s spot by your side. 
Everything after that was a blur for you, only knowing that the medical staff were busy performing tests on you, doing what they could to make sure you were okay. You became more and more aware of your surroundings as they did so, feeling the shock of the incident slowly starting to wear off. They decided you wouldn’t need to go to the hospital and that it appeared to be a grade two concussion, paired with the sudden shock of the injury. While you’d still spend longer than you’d like on the sidelines, it was a much better outcome than anyone was expecting given the state you had been in when it happened. 
Once the physios had finished their tests, they gave you some medication for the pain and let you doze off on one of the treatment tables, snuggled into Mapi’s side while the game ended. The second the final whistle blew, Alexia was sprinting off the pitch with the sole intention of finding you, ignoring any other responsibilities that might have been awaiting her. 
She burst through the door to the training room, expecting to be told that they took you to the hospital, stopping herself only when she saw you sleeping peacefully against Mapi. For the first time since you went down, the blonde was able to take a deep breath and calm down now that she had seen you looking relatively okay. 
“Ssshhh, Ale, she’s asleep. But she’s okay. Grade two concussion, and plenty of shock but she’ll be okay, that’s all it is.” 
“Gracias a Dios,” Alexia’s shoulders visibility relaxed as she let out a heavy sigh, having assumed the absolute worst for the last half hour. 
“What’s going on between you two? Are you back together or something? Cause I really don’t think-” 
“Si, Mapi,” The blonde rolled her eyes at Mapi’s reaction, knowing it was exactly what had prevented you from telling her earlier. “I know you’re worried about her but I promise it’s different this time. We’re both in a completely different place now, and we’ve talked about it a lot, and it’s going amazing, Mapi. I promise you. I will not do anything to hurt her.” 
“You better not, juro por Dios. I’m so serious, Alexia, if you do anything-”
“I won’t! I swear, Mapi. I could never do that to her again. It kills me that I even did it the first time. This time is completely different, I love her more than I’ve ever loved anyone before.” 
The defender only responded with a very pointed look, clearly not too pleased with the current situation. It didn’t help matters that you were still passed out against her, unable to help your girlfriend reassure her that things were going well between you. 
Not wanting to discuss it any further, Mapi slid out from underneath you, carefully allowing Alexia to slide into her place. It was clear you knew who it was, snuggling into her further and grabbing the top of her kit tightly to make sure she couldn’t leave. It didn’t matter to you that she was drenched in sweat and smelling rough, you just needed her close to you, even if you weren’t awake enough to consciously decide that. 
Alexia took your movement as an opportunity to wake you up, gently rubbing your shoulder, and speaking softly as she did so. “Hola, amor. I think we should get you home so you can keep sleeping there, get you more comfortable. Si? You’ll stay at mine so I can make sure you’re okay.”
You nodded weakly, mumbling a somewhat incoherent agreement. The idea of going home with her sounded great but the idea of moving sounded like the worst thing you could imagine at the moment. 
She smiled softly at your reaction, knowing that there were few things you loved more than cuddling and that she knew she would have a hard time getting you to agree to get up right now. “You’re so cute when you’re tired and barely making sense, amor. I’ll carry you if you want.” 
She sat up further in an attempt to encourage you to join her, hoping to get a better idea of how you were feeling, but wasn’t expecting to see tears pooling in your eyes as soon as she did so. “Ale, I feel horrible.” Your voice was wobbly as you tried to hold in your emotions, suddenly overcome with pain in your head once again. 
“I know sweetheart, I know. I’ve got you though, okay? I’ve just gotta get you home and then I’ll take good care of you and let you rest more. Is that alright?” 
You nodded, looking and feeling more broken than you ever had before. “Could I please just hug you, first? Then we can go.” 
Your words made her melt, suddenly aware of how much you needed her support right now, allowing you to collapse into her arms. “Shh, I’ve got you. It’ll be okay, I promise. You’ll be alright, mi amor, you’ll be alright.” She rocked you gently in a way that almost seemed to dull the pain you were feeling. This moment in her arms was the best you had felt since you hit the ground, and it did more than you ever could’ve guessed. Something about being in her arms seemed to work better than any prescription ever could.
When you pulled away from her, she gently wiped away your tears, once again pushing your hair back away from your face. “I’ll see if Mapi can grab our stuff and then we’ll meet her at the car okay? Do you want a sweatshirt or anything?” You were both in your kits still and Alexia knew you enough to know that you always ran cold and preferred being snuggled up in a big sweatshirt. Your only response  was a pouty face, sticking your bottom lip out at her with your best puppy dog eyes as she gave you a smile and shake of her head in return. Of course Alexia knew exactly what you were implying with that face. It was your subtle (or not so subtle) way of requesting a sweatshirt of hers instead of your own. “I’ll get you a sweatshirt and let Mapi know that we’re ready to leave. Then I’ll come get you. Okay?” You nodded at her which she acknowledged with a quick peck on the lips before leaving the room, giving you the opportunity to lay down for a few more minutes while you waited. 
You must have slightly dozed off by the time Alexia returned to you because you awoke to the sound of the door opening once again. “Feeling any better?” 
You squinted slightly, trying to let your head adjust to the lights in the room. “Ale, you were gone for like five minutes, why would I feel any different?” The words carried more attitude than you intended, too far distracted by the pounding in your skull, but your girlfriend seemed to be unphased, just shrugging off your words before helping pull her sweatshirt on over your head. 
Once you seemed to be more comfortable, she turned so her back was facing you, bending down slightly so you could climb on, piggy-back style. “Hop on, I’ll carry you to the car, amor.” So you did just that, climbing on and then burying your face into the side of her neck, partially to block out some of the light, partially because you just wanted to be as close as possible. 
When you reached her car, she gently set you down on the passenger seat, making sure you were comfortable and buckled before leaving a kiss on the top of your head to go to the driver’s side. As soon as she sat down, she reached to hold your hand, giving it yet another reassuring squeeze. Although the silence between you provided some relief from the pounding in your head, It also sent you into a spiral of anxiety thinking about what this concussion might mean for you. 
Alexia quickly noticed your change in demeanor as she drove and how you went from mostly asleep in a comfortable silence to staring into space, clearly filled with tension. The fact that you were suddenly more awake was her biggest red flag given that you had been in and out the entire time she’d seen you. The panicked Alexia that had appeared when you first went down seemed to be back and filled with concern over you once again. “Hey, are you okay? Is something worse with your head, amor? What’s wrong? Do you want me to pull over? I can pull over if you want?” 
“I don’t know, I’m just scared I guess.” You gave her a grim shrug that did little to calm her nerves, still looking at you expectantly, trying to figure out how to help. 
“Scared of what? You’ll be okay, they said most of your symptoms should be getting better already in a few days.”
“Not about that, Ale.”
“Then what…” the blonde trailed off, clearly confused as to what you were saying. 
When she seemed to not be catching on, you let out a sigh, dreading saying the words that had come to mind. “It’s just that last time we dated, injuries are part of what tore us apart. We couldn’t deal with the stress of them. I’m just scared that that might happen again.” You paused, trying to put your thoughts into words, “I can’t lose you again, Alexia. So I don’t know if I should stay with you and I don’t know if we should do this, because I don’t think I can handle that again.” Your voice cracked as you went silent once again, both of you simmering in what was just said. By the time you finished speaking she had pulled into the driveway so she could now turn to face you, cradling the side of your head in her hand. The warmth of her large hand provided you comfort as you leaned into her touch, letting her support your head even more.
“Amor. I know it’s scary, I do. But I never plan on letting you go. Not ever. I promised Mapi that while you were passed out earlier and I’ll promise you that. We talked about this, we were both different people then. We are both more mature, stronger, kinder, smarter, and better. This is not the same.” You finally looked up to meet her eyes for the first time that night. “And I think you know that, amor. I love you, so, so, so, much. It’s okay to be scared, I’ll carry enough faith in us for the two of us. But at the end of the day, I’m not going anywhere. I promise. There’s a reason we got back together, si?” 
It was rare that you saw Alexia get so sentimental and emotional but something about you seemed to bring out that side of her. “Gracias, Ale,” she leaned forward to give you a gentle kiss. “I don’t know what I would do without you. Seriously.” She interrupted you with more kisses in an attempt to pull your mind away from your anxieties and back to the present. 
When she pulled away, Alexia was relieved by the small smile that had appeared on your face, the first she’d seen since before the game today. “Now let’s go inside, we can take a bath and get you some comfier clothes, and get you all snuggled up to go to bed. I’ll hold you as much as you want, I won’t go anywhere.” 
You gave her a small nod, before slowly leaving the car and following her inside, ready for a night with Alexia all to yourself and ready to take care of you. Your head still hurt, but if there was one thing that could make it feel better, you knew it would be your girlfriend and the hardcore pain meds you’d been given.
might end up doing one more for this but we'll see :)
Requests are always open
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paigebueckersmommy · 2 days
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just tired - p.b
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paige bueckers x reader
requested by anon (kinda)
warnings: ed! , mental health issues, passing out
if you or anyone you know is struggling with an ed, don’t be afraid to reach out for help and my messages are open ❤️
you didn’t know what it was but recently you had been struggling a lot recently and didn’t know why. you had the worlds best girlfriend, and the best friends that you could ask for.
recently you found yourself looking at the back of food packaging, and always being tired.
the past 4 times you went to paige’s dorm you fell asleep almost instantly, which wasn’t normal for you. paige knew about your past with ed your freshman year, and was always checking in but things didn’t start getting bad for you till recently. paige had taken you on a vacation for your 2 year anniversary and you got insecure when you put on a swimsuit for the first time in months.
you were at paige’s dorm, laying in her bed with paige next to you eating a bag of goldfish. “baby do you want some?” paige said. “uh no i’m fine i had something before i came.” you say with uncertainty in your voice knowing that you wouldn’t be able to look at the food label without paige seeing. “are you okay princess? you’ve said that the past couple times you’ve been here when i’ve offered you food and your always falling asleep. i’m getting worried”paige said siting up and looking at you. “P, i promise im fine. “ you say pressing a kiss to her lips.
the next day
it was 7pm, and you were at the gym for the 2nd time that day. you were running on the treadmill watching the ‘cals. burned’ part of the screen go up when you got in incoming facetime call from paige. knowing she would freak out if she knew you were there for the 2nd time, you ran into the bathroom and into the stall at the end before picking up. you answer the phone, out of breath. “hi baby! i was wonder- ma where are you?” paige said with confusion. “oh uh- i’m at the gym.” you say knowing you couldn’t keep anything from paige. “baby didn’t you go this morning before your first class?” paige says.
“y-yea but i had some extra time on my hands tonight.” you say with shaky breath. “okay. as long as your eating 3 meals a day baby.” paige says with a sincere voice. “anyway i was wondering segue you get home if i could come over. i need to study and kk is being so loud playing fortnite… i also miss you.” you smile. “yea paige that’s fine ill be home in like 30 minutes.” you lie. you would be home in 15.
when you get home you shower, feeling faint. you change into sweats as you are cold despite taking a hot shower. you brush your hair and start walking into the living room when-
you pass out.
paige’s pov:
i jiggle my keys into her apartment door when i walk in and she’s on the floor of her living room. i immediately drop all my stuff, rushing next to her side. i start nudging and shaking her with panic, “baby wake up it’s me paige please baby,” i say as i feel a tear form and not long after i feel it fall.
readers pov:
i feel myself being shaken. was i asleep? did i fall asleep on my floor? “baby please wake up,” i hear paige say as i start to comprehend the things happening. “paige what happened,” you say, fluttering your eyes. “baby i think you passed out are you okay? why haven’t you been eating.” paige says as you notice that’s she’s crying.
“baby please talk to me. i’ve been worrried by you a lot recently.” paige helps you up as you both sit on your couch. “i-i don’t know. it’s just that i feel like my body isn’t good enough i need to lose weight.”
paige looks at you. “baby. your the most perfect girl i’ve ever met. every part of you, your personality, your body, your face, anything. you don’t have to change anything about you baby your already perfect.”
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xxshadowbabexx · 2 days
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requests you say??? 😈
hmm can i ask for some daddy price who has a one night stand with his sergeant before she gets transferred to him?
maybe neither of them know the other person, meaning price doesn’t know she’s his new sergeant and she doesn’t know he’s her new captain. then the next day comes and all is revealed, and she is determined to brush it all under the rug but he’s not letting her go.
idk how it gets to this, but i’m thinking it ends with him getting her in his office and forcing her to cum over and over?
i know you’re not shy to write darker things so maybe dubcon vibes when he’s fucking her again? but she definitely wants it. and then some heavy daddy kink?
all of that ^ is optional at the end of the day though LMAOO it’s just a brain worm i’ve had for a future fic so you can do whatever you want with it <3
ily ily ily pookie
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Rules Are Made to Be Broken
warnings: dubcon!!!, smut, vaginal sex, oral sex (m and f receiving), praise, degradation, f!reader, multiple orgasms, language, possessiveness, daddy kink
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John, you were pretty sure that was his name. Then again, it didn’t really matter to you as he had you pressed up against your bedroom wall, nipping at your neck. You moaned into his touch, grinding against his thigh as his mouth left crimson blue bruises in its wake. 
He laughed, grabbing your hips and assisting you in grinding along his thigh. “Such a needy slag. So desperate for a mans attention,” you whined in response, nodding. 
“So bloody needy,” he grunted, slipping one hand under your skirt to trace the outline of your pussy through your panties. You knew you were dripping, and you knew he felt it with how he stared at you. He was clearly undressing you with his eyes, licking his lips as he stared at your breasts. 
“I need more, John. Please-“
You checked yourself out in the mirror, wanting to look good once you finally met your new squad. To say you weren’t nervous would be a lie. You knew you would likely do some physical training with your squad today, which normally wouldn’t be a problem. You knew you held up well in combat. Thing was, you were extremely sore from last nights activities, which had lasted well into the morning. So, it was your first day with a nee crew, you were sleep deprived, sore, covered in hickeys and… shit. You were going to he late. 
You threw your head back in a moan, hands digging into John’s scalp as he ate you out vigorously. You were sitting on his shoulders, still pressed against the wall. You could see yourself in the mirror across your room, and fuck did you look good. 
He grunted into your pussy, thick fingers kneading your ass as he lapped at your hole, nose nuzzling your clit. One of his hands sneaked upward towards your lower back, grabbing it and pulling, forcing you to arch. 
He pulled back slightly, gazing at your pussy, eyes showing something dark inside him, “So fucking good. So fucking good for me,” he whispered to himself before diving back in. 
You arrived only three minutes late. Your eyes found who you assumed to be your squad members sitting around a table. You didn’t have time to take any of them in because-
“Three minutes can be life or death in the military, sergeant. If you want to stay with us- stay alive, you’ll have to do better,”
John. You might not have been sure of his name early last night, but he made sure you knew it by the time he left. You weren’t sure if you could ever forget it. 
“Sit,” he commanded, voice going straight to your core. It was the very same tone he commanded you with last night. You shook your head to clear your thoughts before following his instructions. You were at work. You couldn’t be having thoughts like these. Couldn’t be thinking about-
“Suck,” his voice was rough, demanding as the head of his cock prodded at your lips. And who were you to disobey?
You opened your mouth, wrapping your lips around the tip and teasing his slit with your tongue before you looked up. You looked deep into his eyes, and sucked. 
You were barely paying attention as John spoke. He was your captain, because of course he was. You did catch a few things he said, something about a ghost- was this base haunted? Someone really liked soap and you think you heard the word “gaz”. You weren’t sure what any of it meant. 
Too busy focusing on how your captains mutton chops had felt between your thighs last night, the heaviness of his cock in your mouth, and how it burned when he finally-
“John-“ you almost screamed. “Fuck! It’s too much, it’s not gonna-“
He cut you off by sticking two of his fingers into your mouth, “Shh, shh, it will fit, doll. You jus’ have to relax for me, you can do that, can’t you? Be a big girl and take it for daddy?”
“-You’re all dismissed,” John’s voice cut through your thoughts. You followed the lead of the other three men and moved to get up, heading for the door. 
But then John said your name. You turned to him, “Yes, Captain?”
“Stay. I have to go over some things with you still,”
Oh no. 
You had barely came down from your third orgasm of the night when John had tossed you onto your bed. You bounces, landing on your stomach. He didn’t give you time to recover before he was pulling your ass back and sliding into your cunt again. 
“Oh fuck daddy I- fuck,” you whined as he instantly resumed his brutal pace. 
“Yeah? Too fucked out to form a proper sentence? Don’t worry doll, daddy’s got you,”
“What do we need to go over?” You asked, willing the heat inside you to dwindle. Something about him being your boss made you want him more, and you wanted him now. 
But no. He’s your boss, and that’s exactly why you can’t. If you slept with him again and people found out, you would be dishonorably discharged. 
“Did you hear me?” Fuck, you zoned out again. 
You shook your head, “No, sir. My apologies,”
“I said, don’t be coy with me. You know exactly what we have to talk about,” he repeated, stepping closer to you and crossing his arms. 
You stepped back, “I really don’t, Captain,”
He grunted, “That’s not what you were calling me last night,”
“Sir?” you questioned. He can’t actually want to talk to you about this. 
“You might be acting like you haven’t a clue what I’m on about, but your marked up neck tells me otherwise, doll,”
Oh god, did he have to call you that?
“Bloody hell, doll. ‘M gonna cum. Gonna cum in this tight fucking cunt of yours. You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Of course you would. A slag like yourself would be lucky to have me fill then up,”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” you muttered uselessly, “it’s unprofessional,”
“Unprofessional my ass. We both know my cock is worth the risk. So are you gonna let me take you again, or are you gonna make this messy?”
“There you go doll. Getting messy all o’er my cock, such a good little tease,”
“We can’t sleep together again, John,” you closed your eyes in frustration. 
He grinned, “Oh but we will,” You opened your mouth to protest, but he cut you off “-Bend over the table. Legs spread,”
“What?” you gasped, “Sir I can-“
“That’s an order, sergeant,”
You stared at him for what felt like hours before you moved over towards the table. You bent down so you were leaning on your elbows, legs spread wide. Clearly he wasn’t impressed because you heard him tut behind you. 
Then his hands were on your arms, pulling them out from under you. You fell flat onto the table, wincing out in pain and surprise. 
“Sir, what the fu-“ you were cut off by a harsh blow landing on the curve of your ass. 
“Quiet pet. You’re just going to make this harder on yourself,”
“But I-“ another hit. 
“Did you not hear me? Or are slags like you unable to listen to basic orders?”
You didn’t say anything, and he seemed happy with that. He took the palm of his ass and gently rubbed over the sore fat he had struck earlier. 
“Good girl, keep behaving and I’ll make it worthwhile,” he whispered against your ear, and you felt his hands move to unbutton your cargos, pulling them down to your knees. Instantly, he was grinding into you, and you could feel his cock hard and stiff against you. 
You moaned at the feeling. 
“See? Complaining about how we can’t do this, but clearly you want it just as bad as I do. Needy little thing,” he chuckled. 
You whined, “We really shouldn’t,”
He hummed, “I can hear your resolve slipping, sweetheart,”
You shook your head, “But we can’t, John. I’ll get in trouble, I’ll-“
You cut off with a moan as he slipped a finger through your folds. 
“So wet for me. Bloody soaked. If anything I’d say that you liked the risk,”
Fuck, he was right on the money. He doesn’t need to know that. His thumb began to circle your clit, and he pushed a finger into your slick heat. 
“Going to make you cum so hard, doll. You won’t even remember why you resisted,”
“Daddy fuck,” you whined, now laying on your back. John had one arm holding your knees up by your head, the other arm had two fingers slamming into your puffy cunt. Slick covered and overstimulated, practically drooling around him. 
“Yeah babydoll? Going to cum again?”
“Yes! Oh fuck- yes. I’m so close- please daddy,” you wailed, muscles tensing as you came for the nth time that night. You saw stars. You might’ve blacked out a little. When you finally came to, you found John between your thighs again, lips suctioned to your clit. 
“There she is. Got one more in you?”
“Promise?” you whispered. 
He smirked, “Promise what? That I’ll ruin you for anyone else?”
You whimpered out a “yes” and then his fingers started moving in you. Fast, and hard enough to cause your hips to repeatedly smack the table. 
John grabbed your chin, twisting your head to kiss you with a mind numbing passion. He moaned into your mouth as he felt you tighten and gush around him. He was repeatedly hitting that sensitive spot inside you while slowly circling your clit. 
It was heavenly and it was just enough. You pulled back slightly, “‘M so close daddy- please let me cum,”
“Yeah? Does my girl need it?” you nodded, “Go ahead doll. Cum around my fingers, I know you want to,”
He kissed you again to mute your screams as you came. It was dizzying and you almost wept, tears pooling in your waterline as he kept finger-fucking you through bliss. 
“That’s it. So good and pretty for me. My pretty fucking slag. Bet you want my cock now, right? I seem to recall one orgasm not being enough for you last night,”
You and John had been cuddling for about half an hour after your last round. It was nice, but you needed something else. You got up from his chest and moved to straddle his lap, placing your hands on his muscular chest. 
He opened one eye, watching you lazily, “little minx. Go on, take what you want from me,”
You nodded, “Please fuck me,”
“Yeah?” he mocked, “Why should I? Going to behave if I do?”
“Yeah,” you agreed, “I’ll be so good for you,”
He smiled, kissing your neck, “I know, I know,” and then his fingers were moving inside you again. 
“You’ll get my cock, darling. You just have to cum around my fingers again first,”
Well he lied, because suddenly you were on your fourth orgasm of the night and his fingers were still the only thing to have been inside you. If you weren’t so fucked out you might’ve had the wherewithal to realize that he liked breaking you like this. Prick. 
But you were too busy pushing his hands away due to the overstimulation to think. 
“Daddy- fuckfuckfuck! It’s too much I can’t,” you sobbed, arching your back as your fifth orgasm overtook you. It ravished your body, ricocheting through you violently til you couldn’t see straight. 
“Well if you want to stop we can, but you won’t be getting my cock then,”
“No!” You should have been embarrassed at how quickly the response left your tongue. “Need your cock, please,”
He kissed your shoulder before pulling his fingers out of you and sticking them in your mouth. You could hear him unbuckling his trousers as you sucked his fingers clean, and you felt a surge of giddiness rush through you. 
John took his fingers out of your mouth, placing them around your throat as you felt his cock prod at your hole. 
“Ready for me?” you nodded. 
All that prep and it still burned as he pushed in to the hilt. He was just so goddamn thick. Maybe you were just overstimulated and fucked out, but you swore his cock was made for you. 
You didn’t realize you had said that last part out loud until John laughed, “Made for you? Darling have you ever considered that maybe this pussy was made for me?” he asked as he started thrusting, making it impossible to form a coherent answer. 
His thrusts were brutal, and he tightened his hand around your throat. “Fuck, this filthy cunt of yours feels so fucking good wrapping around me. It’s my bloody cunt. No one else gets to see it- fuck. No one else gets to feel it around them,” he growled, hips slamming into yours hard enough to bruise. 
You cried, a broken moan leaving your lips. It felt so good, you were so full. He was touching you everywhere you needed him to and fuck-
You whimpered, “Daddy fu-“ thighs tightening and eyes shooting shut as you came again. He growled, dropping your throat to wrap his hands around your wrists and pinning them behind your back. 
You sobbed, it was too much. You couldn’t think, couldn’t speak, and thanks to your tears you couldn’t see. You were a shaking mess, utterly destroyed. Ruined for anyone but him. 
John growled behind you, picking up pace, “That’s it, doll. Keep clenching ‘round me like that and I’ll be coming in no time dontcha worry,” 
And then the was cumming. 
You squealed as he filled you up. You didn’t think it was possible to get more full, and maybe it wasn’t. Because his cum was oozing out of you, past the base of his cock and dripping down your thighs. There was just so much of it. Thick and pearly white. 
And when he let go of your wrists you scoop up some of his cum and shove it down your throat, you knew it in your soul. 
John Price would be the death of you. 
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“To lead a better life, I need my love to be here”
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Summary: Toji notices something is off about you after you take care of Megumi. Genre: Fluff, angst, hurt, comfort, toji x black!stepmom! Reader
CW: Literally nothing, toji and reader curse, discussions of addiction, Toji calls reader Ma
A/N: This man takes up too much space in my brain. 🤡
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6:47 P.M 
Toji knew there was something off when he came back home that day. 
The silence engulfed the house, with only the occasional sound of your knife slicing into the meat you were preparing for dinner. 
7:25 P.M 
When he finally gets a good look at you at dinner, you look shaky. Your eyes swirl with worry. So, he bites.
“How was the parent-teacher conference?” 
You snap your head up and put a smile that doesn’t reach your eyes. “It went well. Megumi is a great student, the teachers are mostly worried because he is quiet. They say he needs to participate more in class and interpersonal discussions.” 
Megumi casually rolls his eyes hearing the conversation and goes back to finishing his vegetables. 
Toji looks you over. Maybe, you're just tired? Probably, a mood swing of yours. He shrugs and looks down at his plate. 
“...Ok.” 
10:00 P.M
The night is deadly quiet. He hoped that after Megumi had gone to sleep, you would be better. You weren’t. So, he put his faith in a good night’s rest. It’s been an off day for you, you can just sleep it off. 
3:30 A.M 
Toji wakes up to an empty bed. He fucking hates it. It reminds him of the lonely days of being a widower. He slowly gets up and begins his mission to find you. 
He checks the bathroom and doesn’t find you nor does he find you in the guest bedroom. So, he goes downstairs. He finds you lying on the couch with the tv playing some type of liminal rain ASMR, or whatever white noise helps you sleep. However, when he peeks over the arm, you’re still awake. 
“Ma, are you aware of what time it is?” He asks cheekily. 
You slowly rise and rub your eyes. Even with the low glow of the TV, he can tell they’re puffier than usual. He bites for a second time. 
“Hey Ma, what’s got you so worked up huh?” 
You look down. “Nothing, baby.” 
Toji sits down on the couch. The third time is the charm right? 
“Bullshit. What happened? Hm?” 
You sigh. Toji has always been persistent. 
“Toji..have you ever noticed that Megumi is like really mature for his age?”
He tilts his head to the side as if you’ve asked him the most idiotic question. 
“ ‘m, yeah. What about it?” 
You scratch at the nicotine patch on your arm. You stopped smoking when Toji decided he and Megumi would move in with you almost a year ago. 
“I don’t see any reason why you should stop, seems like more trouble than it’s worth.” 
“Kids learn by example, If I smoke what kind of message is that sending to Megumi?” 
You fiddle with the patch, still unused to the foreign feel as you grin. 
“Besides, I don’t think he would like the smell.”
“Toji…that’s not normal.” You sigh. 
He raises a brow. He knew Megumi was different. However, he always accepted  it as a funny, convenient quirk. 
You stand up and drag your hands down your face. 
“Kids are kids for a reason Toji. They’re supposed to be chaotic, messy, emotional, hell even unpredictable. Megumi is none of those. Every move that child makes is so carefully planned and throughout. He’s never excited about toys, games, or cartoons. he’s always offering to help around the house, Toji he fuckin asked me about our finances once. Hell, even his teachers agree! How can you look me dead in the eyes and tell me that a 6-year-old is “Mature for his age” as a good thing!” 
You take a heavy pause. You scratch at your leg. 
“He’s only a first grader Toji. He shouldn’t be like this. He-he shouldn’t be a mini adult! He shouldn’t have his guard up all the fuckin time! He’s a child!” 
You sit back down on the couch and throw your head between your legs. Toji rubs your hands that are placed on the back of your head. 
Your voice cracks, “And-and I know I’m not his mother, hell, I’d never try to replace her. I don’t need him to call me “mom” and have me baby him 24/7, but god..god I’m so fuckin worried.” 
You raise your head slightly. Your eyes have become more red and puffy with unshed tears. Toji knows you hate crying. You’ve only cried in front of him twice. First time when you thought your pet Doberman ran away. Second, when you picked Megumi up from school, his homeroom teacher referred to you as his mother. 
“I…I just want to tell him that he’s safe. That-that he doesn’t have to worry about not keeping everything in check. That he can exist without having to be “useful”, that he’s not a burden or unlovable because he’s a little kid. I just want him to exist. I just- just don’t want him to turn out like us.” 
You slump back on the couch and scratch your nicotine patch again. You look at Toji with glossy eyes. 
Usually, he’d put in a snarky remark of “What’s so wrong about me, huh?” but he’s all too aware. Additionally, the shock of you acknowledging your family. He’s always had suspicions, but he, of all people, knew better than to ask. If someone doesn’t talk about their family, its for a reason.
He looks back at you and pulls you into a hug. You lay your head on his broad shoulder. You’re shaking. He slowly leans back to lay you both down. He runs his hand through your scalp. 
“You know…” He quietly speaks, almost as if he’s afraid to startle you. 
You turn your head to hear him better. 
“I think..you’re pretty great. I think…that me and Megumi are thankful to have someone like you. It’s hard right now…but things take time. Don’t push yourself.” 
A few loose tears fall as you snuggle in closer to him. 
“Thank you, baby.”
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pocket-watcher · 3 days
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I slowly opened the door. My roommates had been acting weird the past few days, but I’d shrugged it off.
There, leaning against his desk on one side of the room was Carter. Sitting on Carter’s bed, one of the few places there were to sit in the room, was Myles.
“Uh… you needed me?” I looked up at Carter. His usually playful demeanour was slightly off. I looked at Myles to see if he had any clue what was going on but he seemed like his usual smiley self.
“Yes… what do you know about hypnosis?” Carter asked.
My face felt hot, and so, I bluffed.
“Not much. I think I saw it in some TV shows?” I felt my voice go higher than normal.
His eyes lit up in challenge.
“Do you believe in it?” He asked again. Myles seemed confused too.
“Not really, I mean. It’s kinda sci-fi, right?” I laughed it off - pushing down any thoughts of he knows he knows oh god he knows-
“Maybe. What about you, Myles? Do you believe in hypnosis?” Carter had a mischievous look in his eyes.
Myles brushed it off. “Nah, of course not. It’s like flying or telekinesis or something.”
Carter locked eyes with me.
“Wanna see a cool trick?” He asked, raising his fingers to snap.
“No!” I heard my own voice ring out.
There wasn’t any fear or attempt to stop this from Myles. Just confusion. From me, however?
I’d just given myself away.
Carter snapped and Myles’ head dropped instantly, rolling back and forth before settling in the centre of his chest.
Carter grinned wickedly.
“What did you do?!” I gasped, running over to him. “Myles? Can you hear me?”
No response.
“What did I do?” Carter asked, still not moving from where he was leaning. I kept one eye on him as I shook Myles, getting more desperate. “Why, the same thing I’m about to do to you.”
The statement echoed inside my head. Fear. Dread. Excitement.
I slowly turned to look at Carter.
“Myles, stand.” Carter ordered.
Myles’ eyes opened, half-lidded, mouth agape. He stood and I backed away from him.
“Good boy.” Carter praised.
I started to panic. Shit. Do I run for the door? Both of them are faster than me. Stronger than me too, probably. Why the fuck didn’t I run more or go to the gym or-
Myles mindlessly lunged for me. I scrambled to get away but faltered as the only direction of escape was right towards Carter.
He was waiting there. Watching. Smiling. As if it was all going exactly to plan.
Myles grabbed both of my arms. I’d backed into him in fear, recoiling from Carter at the last second. I struggled but, just as I’d thought, I couldn’t break free.
For the first time during this ordeal Carter stood up and approached us. I looked away, getting a full look at Myles’ blank face looking straight ahead, no matter how much I pleaded with him to just listen to me.
“I understand.” Carter cooed. “You don’t want to submit to me straight away. You like the chase. The struggle. But I know you want to give in to me…”
I looked at him defiantly. The wrong decision. Maybe if I’d thought more about it I’d have realised that was exactly what he wanted.
Carter’s eyes were deep, swirling, drawing me in.
I’d always found him attractive, but now? Now it was like I was losing myself in his eyes. My thoughts slowed. My heartbeat quickened.
I felt my head begin to bow. I tried to look away. Really, I did. But Myles’ hand grabbed my chin and forced my eyes forward once more.
Carter looked at me proudly, as if he’d ensnared his pray. He looked hungry. Cocking his head from side to side and eyes shining as I mirrored his movements.
I felt a smile slowly form on my lips. I was drowning, sinking into his eyes. At some point Myles let go of my arms and began massaging my shoulders. Deeper, deeper. He must’ve known my legs were too weak to run.
It was all so meticulously planned, like a checklist.
Lure me in? Check.
Use Myles to stop me from leaving? Check.
Send me deeper? Check.
Make me lose focus? Check.
Staring into those gorgeous eyes? Check.
As simple and as easy as 1.. 2.. 3…
“You’re doing great. Both of you. Oh the fun we’re going to have with two of you now…”
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hecateslore · 14 hours
Text
☆💋
pt.1, pt.2 and pt.3 are all here! (asks are open.)
Melting played softly in the background while you put your lashes on, blinking and looking at yourself in the mirror once you finished. You phone rang, you grabbed your remote lowering the tv's volume, answering it, "Yes," You said sweetly, "I"m down the street."
You stood up, checking your window to catch a glimpse of him on his bike. "Where's the bike?" You asked biting your nail, "In the shop, It had some problems." He said, "Forgot what it's like to drive. " He let out a breathy laugh. "I bet... So do you think you can stay this weekend?" You change the subject, not really in the mood to listen about all his bike drama.
"Yeah, I have to leave for a couple on Saturday, But then I should be good." He said. You were still looking out of the window, you could see him pulling into the complex, You hummed in acknowledgement, "I'll leave the door open for you, I need to finish my makeup and then get dressed." You hang up the phone, cutting him off like you normally do.
"Here." Simon shouted from your front door, he looked around your apartment noticing how spotless it was. Simon walked down the hall to your room, catching a glance of you lining your lips in your robe. "Creep." You mumbled watching Simon from the mirror. He chuckled and walked towards you, standing behind watching your do your last touches, You lifted your head back to look at him. Simon bent his head down, catching your lips in a kiss.
"You're still not done?" His hands rubbed your shoulders while you look up at him, "I need to change." You stared at him, "You have gloss on your lips." You sat back up.
He shrugged cleaning his mouth with the back of his hand. You got dressed fixing your gloss and lip liner one more time before hitting the road with Simon. "So where are we going today?" You said from the passenger seat, "I got to make a couple of stops, then we can decide." He looked at you, You nodded.
You both pulled up in a building lot, majority of the buildings were empty, Price and Johnny outside, holding a black duffel bags and plastic bags wrapped shut with a rubber band. Johnny waved at you and you waved back, "I'll be right back," Simon pecked your cheek before getting out and talking to the men.
A couple of words exchanged before he came back in the car, "DO you want to get some food?" He asked casually, "That's fine." You mumbled, "What's wrong?" He sighed, noting your mood change, "Nothing, I'm fine." You faked a grin. Simon narrowed his eyes, before leaning in for a kiss, "Stop pouting." He popped your lip with his finger. "My lips," You swatted his hand, immediately going to check the mirror.
-
"Don't drop that one." You warned Simon who was holding what look like hundreds of bags filled with clothes, shoes, jewelry and random things for your house. You walked up the stairs carefully trying not to drop anything. "Let me unlock the door." You said aloud, mostly to your self. "Okay," You said quietly while opening the door. You went back to get the rest of your things.
Simon chuckled at the sight of all the boxes and bags that sat on the living room floor. "I'm gonna put all this away," You happily grabbed some bags taking them to your room.
Simon watched you walk off debating whether or not to hide one of the bags around your house for the moment. He bit the inside of his cheek in thought. "What are you doing?" You asked looking at Simon who was still standing in the middle of the room, "Was just thinking."
"Thinking about what?" You bent down to grab the last bags of clothes. "Stuff." He mumbled, "Yeah sure." You rolled your eyes, going back to your room. "Do you have to work tonight?" Simon yelled from where he was standing. "No, I took the weekend off." You yelled back.
Simon sighed, trying to figure out where he was going to store the bags, Somewhere you wouldn't notice, and how was he going to sneak them in without you knowing.
"You're still standing there?" You giggled, snapping him out of thought. "Is something wrong?" You cock a brow, "No, no." He shook his head. "I'm gonna get out of these clothes, when I come back don't be stone." You joked, Simon forced out a chuckle, that you obviously knew was a fake.
-
You laid on the couch Simon between your legs while you hum along to Barbara Streisand sing My Man.
oh my man, I love him so he'll never know
"How many times have you watched this?" He mumbled, voice muffled by your boobs. "Way too many." Your eyes never pulled away from the screen.
Oh, my life is just despair but I don't care
"Why's she crying?" He asked, "Simon shush." You placed you hand over his mouth. "I love this part." You mumble, "Why?" Simon whined. "Because I love this song," Simon rolled his eyes. "You just don't understand the lyricism." You pulled his hair, earning a quiet ow from him, "The lyrics are cheesy." He complained.
"It's because you've never been in love that way," You explain, "You're just shallow." You finished, Simon got up, "I'm not shallow." He said offended, "I wasn't trying to be mean," You chuckled, "but guys don't get it like women do."
"Sure. " He rolled his eyes, sitting back on the couch. "Here we go." You snorted, pausing the movie. "So now what?" You sit with your arms crossed, "Finish your movie." He says grabbing his phone. "You don't want to," You move closer to him, putting your legs over his thighs. "So when are you going tomorrow, so I can tell my other boyfriend to come over." You laughed.
"You wish you had another boyfriend." Simon teased, "I do, that way what you don't do, he will." You jested in return. "Ha, ha." Simon laughed sarcastically.
-
When you fell asleep Simon waited until you were deep in it, waiting for the perfect moment for him to go down stairs to grab the bags. He grabbed both of them, taking one out on your patio and hiding it in your gardening box, under all of your extra cleaning supplies. Hiding the other behind your washer and dryer.
He slipped back in bed laying next to you, "Why're you up?" You asked groggily, "I went to the bathroom." He assured you, "You smell like outside." You said mid-sleep. "I was on the patio taking a call." He lied. "Oh." You yawned. Simon kissed you forehead as you wondered back to sleep. Crossing his fingers hoping you don't find any of the bags these coming weeks.
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cowgurrrl · 15 hours
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Roll The Bones
Pairing: Joel Miller x reader
Author’s note: I wrote this in the midst of a flare up so please enjoy and be gentle with your disabled friends <3
Summary: A bad pain day with Joel [1.5k]
Warnings: descriptions of injuries and subsequent chronic pain, medical settings and discussion, I think that’s it??
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When Joel finds you, you're in a pitiful state. Your arm is folded over your face, covering your eyes even though the blinds are closed and the room is dark. Your right leg is peeking out from under the bundle of blankets and quilt, elevated with a lukewarm towel surrounding the swelling kneecap. The room smells like the salve someone in the town makes that's supposed to alleviate your pain. So far, it's just given you a headache. Your entire body throbs with pain and frustration. It shouldn't be like this, you think ruefully. I shouldn't feel like this. 
Joel lightly pads over to your bedside— his footsteps quiet now that he's discarded his boots by the front door— and perches next to you. His hand finds a home on your afflicted knee and carefully maneuvers his thumb over the tendons to help with the pain. You shift the arm covering your face to reach for him, and he smiles. 
"There she is," he murmurs as you take him in. His hair is long and a little unruly in the back, but you think it makes him look soft and domestic. He's shed his work jacket and heavier clothes downstairs and is clad in his soft, well-worn-in flannel. He smells like pine and leather. You want to wrap yourself in his warmth but settle for having him nearby. "Ellie told me you were havin' a rough day." He says. It doesn't surprise you that she did, even though you promised her you were fine and didn't need him. It's become rare that she doesn't update him daily on your health.
About a year ago, you were on patrol with Tommy when a Runner came out of nowhere and charged at your horse. She startled and bucked you off before you could regain control of the reins. The Runner was dead before you could hit the ground, and your horse would be recovered within the day, but the damage was done. You broke your leg in two places and dislocated your knee, in addition to a low-level concussion and cuts on your face and arms. When you came back into Jackson on Tommy's horse, half-conscious, bloody, and delirious with pain, Joel was horrified, Ellie even more so.
You were in the hospital for a month as they used what they could to put you in something akin to a cast and reset the bones. Joel and Ellie took turns being guards at your bed, monitoring what they gave you, when, and how much, and how your healing process was going. They were there with you every day, learning the tips and tricks to support you and keeping you sane as you stared at the white walls. 
Six months, the doctor said. Six months is all it would take to be back to normal as long as you did everything you were supposed to. Things have gotten better slower than you would like, but they have gotten better. You have really good days where you don't feel anything other than slight twinges when you move your leg in a weird way. Those days, it's hard to remember that you broke it in the first place. But other days, like today, you can feel every muscle in your leg tightening as stiff pain rockets up and down your body. You thought you could persevere enough to go to the store with Ellie, but your body obviously had other plans.
"My leg gave out on me when I was coming down the stairs. Pretty sure I made the whole house shake when I fell." You explain, and his eyebrows knit together in phantom pain as his thumb works your muscle. 
"You hurt anythin'?" He asks. "Other than your pride?" You blow air out of your nose in a half-laugh and shake your head. 
"Just some bruises," you say. He finds a tender spot in your knee that makes you hiss and ball up your fists, but he doesn't let up until the muscle releases. It's what he's supposed to do: break up the scar tissue, relax the muscles, and hope for the best. It still hurts like a bitch, and it'll hurt more in the morning. He mumbles apologies under his breath and kisses you to try and distract you, but your brain's been running wild for hours. "I went so long without any pain." You finally say, breaking the reverie and collapsing the unwanted space your pain often creates. 
"You've been takin' on a lot these past few weeks. It doesn't surprise me somethin' would flare up." It's an honest assessment. He warned you this would happen, but you ignored him. You thought you knew your body better. You wanted to know your body better. The returning thought and the gentle hand on your knee turn your tongue into sandpaper, and tears prick in the corners of your eyes. Despite the low light in the room, Joel catches it and makes a sympathetic noise. 
"Hey, talk to me." He says softly, shifting his hand from your knee to your face to catch a few stray tears. You shake your head and try and fail to form the words. Joel is patient. He always is, but he shouldn't have to be. 
"I'm so tired of being like this." You whisper, hating the feel of the words on your tongue and hating the sound of them even more. Joel gives you a confused look and pushes your hair out of your face. 
"Bein' like what?"
"Sick," you choke out. Now that the dam is broken, there's no stopping the bitter rush of words from leaving you. "We took her across the country and got rid of anyone who even looked at her wrong. Now, I can't even get on a horse without hurting. And I do all the stupid fucking things the doctor tells me to do. I do the exercises and take the medicine and everything, and nothing is making it better, and I'm so tired." 
"Why didn't you tell me that?" 
"Because I didn't want you to think I'm broken." It's a thought you've harbored since you were laid up in the hospital, unable to even walk to the bathroom without help, but this is the first time you've expressed it. You secretly hoped if you just didn't say anything about it, maybe Joel wouldn't notice. It's a stupid idea, given that your entire lives have changed since the accident. You just didn't want to get thrown away like all the other broken things in this world. Joel takes a deep breath and gazes at you. 
"Honey, you aren't broken. Not even close to it," he says. You want to counter him, but the weight of your emotion is too heavy on your chest. "I wanna know if somethin' is hurtin' you cause when you hurt, I hurt, okay? You're not a burden or somethin' to fix. You just… need a little extra care right now, and that's okay. I wanna take care of you."
"What if it's like this forever?" You ask, and he shakes his head. 
"It won't be."
"But, what if it is?" More tears fill your eyes as you await his answer. He didn't fall in love with this version of you. You don't know if you could blame him if he never does. But with enough ease and love to take your breath away, Joel kisses your forehead, right where your temple smacked against the cold ground. He kisses your forehead and the white scars littering your cheeks before finally shifting to kiss the knee propped up on pillows and hope. He doesn't flinch at the swelling or the angry spasms. He treats them with care and attention. He treats them as another part of you. 
"Takin' care of you has never and will never be on the list of worst things imaginable. Your health is not a sacrifice or a burden on me. If it's like this forever, we'll adapt, but I know you. I know how hard you're workin' to get better. I know we'll find a way to live with this," he says. "But I need you to talk to me when things aren't workin'. I can't help you if you don't tell me what's helpin' and what's not, okay?" You swallow around the lump in your throat and nod. 
"Okay." 
"Okay," he echoes. "I'm gonna get you an appointment with Dr. Lutton and see if we can't get you on a new treatment plan first thing tomorrow mornin'. Is there anythin' I can do for you until then?" He asks, fully prepared to go to the edge of the earth if you asked him to. 
"Can you lay with me?" You ask, and he smiles. 
"Of course, baby." He mumbles. He kisses your knee one more time before shuffling to wrap you in his arms. The warmth from his body helps relieve some of your tension and pain, and he kneads calming circles over your shoulders and back. Your focus shifts from the pain in your leg to the song he's humming, the vibrations in his chest a welcome distraction. The pain doesn't go away entirely— you doubt it ever will— but you rest your weary body against his and sleep, finding wholeness in his acceptance of your loss. 
TAGLIST: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha @cosmoscoffeee @shyminnie07 @beezusvreeland @eddiemunsonsbedroom @harriedandharassed @doodlebob-mp3 @ignorethisplz2004 @buckyispunk @d1lf-loverrr @vee-bees-blog @moel-jiller @anoverwhelmingdin @casssiopeia @maried01 @acupofhollie
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nicksbestie · 19 hours
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Kittens (part two) - M. Sturniolo
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READ PART ONE FIRST!! YOU CAN READ IT HERE!
Summary : One specific person becomes a regular at the animal shelter you work at, always visiting the cats <3
Warnings : mentions of anxiety but nothing graphic!
Word Count : 1146
Pairing : Matt Sturniolo/Reader
A/N : part two!! this won't become a series but i felt it deserved a little more!! it's written in a later time, a epilogue scene, if you will!
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The cats being in a different room that day had been one of the best things to ever happen to you.
You hadn’t known it at the time, but that conversation with Matt, starting by leading him to a separate room, had blossomed into a relationship. Matt had started coming back every day, coming up with stupid reasons to talk to you, claiming he needed help finding a cat that had run away, only for the cat to walk right out from under the tower when Matt walked back in, but you let him do it every time. You felt like you couldn’t resist the opportunity to spend time with him, and if you weren’t busy, why should you?
He spent hours there every day, which made you wonder what he did for work, because how could he afford to not be at his job? After a couple of days where he came in one after another, you finally asked. It felt like a fair question because he clearly knew where you worked, so it was an eye for an eye, or something like that. He told you he did content creation with his brothers, and you looked him up later that evening, eyes nearly popping out of your head when you noticed just how famous they were. You weren’t someone who lived in the dark, but you didn’t keep up with every new thing going on, so there were a ton of famous people you didn’t know about. 
You weren’t going to lie, you stalked him that night. One thing hit you like a truck when you noticed it, though. Matt had told you that he came into the shelter when his anxiety was getting bad, and he had been coming in every Wednesday and Friday per week, and as you scrolled through their shared YouTube, you noticed that’s when videos were posted. You wondered how much he enjoyed his job, or if he did it because it made good money, or if the posting just really got to him because he worried about what people would think. Later you would ask, and you would learn that the latter was the reason, and that he really did love his job, it just got to him sometimes, knowing that so many people would pick apart everything he had done or said in a video. 
After about two weeks of him coming back to the shelter every single day, talking to you whenever he could, he finally asked for your number. He waited until you were off of the clock, making sure that he could never be accused of being unprofessional by anyone. He waited until the shelter closed, like normal, and you thought he had left, but he waited until you both stepped outside, and the door was locked, and then he asked. You let him have it with no complaints, and he texted you for the first time as soon as he got home, asking if you had also made it home safe. You responded much quicker than you would like to admit, letting him know you were home and safe. 
He would text you before he would come into the shelter, letting you know that he was on the way, and you two became incredibly close. Hanging out outside of work, spending time while he was at the shelter, if you were in the same vicinity, you were practically attached at the hip. You met his brothers, and they were so different from him that it was refreshing. You loved how they all got along so well, and even their banter in videos wasn’t coming from a true point of anger, but all lighthearted. You watched every video as they got posted, and sometimes all four of you hung out together before or after filming. You loved being in their company, and you had found a wonderful friend in Matt, but you had no idea that it would eventually become more than that. 
You’d hung out so much on your own, you knew you two worked together, you both knew that the other was attractive, you both knew that you liked the other. But you had no idea that it would eventually end up working out. Nick and Chris knew as well, being able to see it in the way that you interacted with each other. They kept it to themselves, allowing you two to navigate the developments of your relationship with each other by yourselves, but both of them were hoping that you would just get your head out of your ass already and get together. Matt was the first one to say anything. 
You knew he found love gestures sweet, you’d seen that in a video, and you’d seen it in the way that he interacted with people he loved platonically, being a gift giver, but when he showed up at your door with flowers, you were still in shock. He’d stayed the night that evening, soaking in the fact that the person he felt so strongly for had the same feelings for him. It had only snowballed in the best possible way from there. You did everything together, you went everywhere together, and sometimes that could cause codependency problems, but you were lucky to not have to deal with that. You were used to him leaving for a couple of hours to film, but he always came back as quickly as possible. 
It was refreshing for Matt to fall in love with someone who didn’t love him for the numbers, for the following, for the money, for the fame. This was someone who saw him off guard, who actually loved him for the person he was off of the camera, for all of the good in him and all of the bad. He wasn’t sure that he would ever find someone like this due to his popularity across the Internet, but he never took you for granted, not for a single moment. And those were the words that spilled out from between his lips, when he was knelt in front of you, ring box in hand, just three amazing years later, and the same ones that he would repeat at the altar six months after that. 
You didn’t work at the animal shelter anymore, but you and Matt were regular visitors and volunteers. Some of the people that you used to work with were still there, and shortly after you were wed, you picked out a kitten together, from the same Cat Cottages that Matt used to sit in for hours every week. Glancing over at the man you’d fallen in love with, sitting on the couch with the now one year old black cat in his lap, you knew that had been the best job you would ever work, and it brought you something much more rewarding than the money.
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erwinsvow · 13 hours
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you write rafe so good and like you get me like sometimes i’m reading and i’m like “how’d they know😦” so HEAR ME OUT lifeguard!reader (bc i’m a lifeguard at a few country clubs) and i think rafe would be drooling and kelce and top would make fun of him and they’d like break all the rules like back flipping off the diving board just to get readers attention
oh my god first of all i completely adore you!! im so glad yess we must be little brain twins <3 i would love to know which parts made you think that! but here is the best i could come up with for a lifeguard au which is soooo cute but imagine.. its a pogue reader...
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rafe knows every pretty girl who frequents the country club, he's made a point of making sure he does. so a fresh face in the crowd stands out pretty easily, especially one like yours.
you're pretty without trying, hair tugged behind you in a ponytail and a simple red one piece, the bottoms covered with denim shorts. it's not the usual kind of outfit for the club, but maybe you're headed out by the pool or something.
he can only see you from the back, though when you turn around, he sees the white cross on the front of your swimsuit. then he sees the boy in matching red trunks next to you, the whistle around your necks and a little first-aid box in your hands. a hot life guard, it doesn't get much more stereotypical than that.
you look around the club, following the boy who can only be giving you a tour of the facilty, with curious eyes like you've never been here before. it's only then a comment from top snaps him into a frankly startling realization.
"can't believe they hire pogues for this shit. wouldn't be surprised if shit started going missing by the pool deck."
rafe thinks normally he'd throw another line in, laugh at what top's saying, but he can't find it in him today. so he keeps watching, the sweet way you smile at a little girl who stopped you to ask for a bandaid, the way you nod while taking in something else in your training.
"alright. you've been staring at that pogue girl for twenty minutes. what gives?" kelce asks finally, after rafe ignores what they've been saying to him for the third time.
"huh?" he snaps back, tearing eyes away from you to look at his idiot friends.
"don't tell me you got hots for the lifeguard. what're you, thirteen?" they laugh, but rafe doesn't.
"shut up." he stands, downing the rest of his drink. "m'goin' to the pool. you loser can come and shut up or stay here and yap."
when he finally gets out there, you've shed the shorts, looking over the kiddie section of the pool with a watchful eye, taking the responsibility of watching brats seriously. he doesn't hesitate, jumping into the deep end with a huge splash, one that gets your attention.
you walk over, making sure whoever that was didn't just fall in, when two boys yell over.
"hey! lifeguard! our friend needs help!" you turn to look back at the boy who's been training you, wondering if you should dive in or wait since you're still in training, when you hear them again.
"not him! you! in the red. hurry!" you don't hesitate, though you're confused, jumping straight in and swimming over to the boy. he doesn't look like he needs help, in fact, he looks like he's floating.
"um, excuse me-" that's all you get out when you get close to him, because he scoops you up like he's rescuing you, carrying you out of the pool like a bride. you kick your feet, yelling out. "hey! put me down! you're not even drowning!"
he sets you down, and you wipe your face, staring up at pretty blue eyes and an arrogant face, once you recognize, one that your best friends hate.
"oh. you. i should have known."
"me? yeah, heard about me, have you? only good things, i hope."
"yeah, no. what the fuck was all that? i thought you were drowning."
"yeah, i was. thanks for the help." confused, soaking wet, and not appreciating his two little sidekicks snickering behind you, you try to get away, when rafe follows.
"so, uh, how long you been working here?"
"it's my first day."
"yeah, i thought so. i never forget a pretty face, so-"
"are you serious?"
"dead serious. and yours is definitely pretty."
"rafe," you say, leaning in closer so he can hear you clearly. "stop hitting on me. i have to work. some of us actually have to work."
"know my name already, huh? what else have you heard-" you roll your eyes, he laughs.
"i heard you're a good swimmer," you say, taking another step closer.
"yeah. from who?"
"i don't know. i'm about to find out." with one hand, you push his chest, and he falls backwards into the pool, the water splashing around your feet. you laugh, watching him bob in the pool, his friends laughing too. "good talk. hope we never speak again."
rafe gets out of the pool, pushing his wet hair back. he calls out after you.
"yeah we'll see about that."
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redeyegrl · 11 hours
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☆ it’s a prank ; jude bellingham
vlogger gf and bf!jude
authors note: this is a reblog from my old acc. rip to her :( !! enjoy <3!!
you and jude were visting your home city in states and today you were both heading out to shop for your next vacation spot. both agreeing to leave at this very moment to pick up some items from the mall, you quickly made your way to the car first with your vlogging camera, to then quickly holding up the camera getting ready to talk to your subbies. you start the video off telling your subscribers about todays video idea you had in mind.
"alright guys, jude is still inside so that gives me a few minutes to tell you guys todays prank" you excitedly state.
"today's prank is definitely going to be an easy prank, and a prank i know jude is for sure going to enjoy" you say playfully rolling your eyes. "but, today i am going to do the "i can't stop kissing my boyfriend prank" you say rubbing your hands together like an evil villain.
"jude thinks that were just going to be vlogging today at the mall, but really he's about to be kissed up a storm" you finish explaining, nervously laughing in the end. 
as you continue to talk to the camera, you catch your world famous footballer boyfriend already walking out the house getting ready to get inside the car. "oh snap he's coming, he's coming" you whisper, quickly adjusting yourself to seem as if everything was going on normally.
jude opens up the door to the rented black lamborghini urus and gets himself inside the car.
"saw you talking to the camera. already starting the video without me?" he says pulling down the seatbelt. "yeah yeah, just chatting about what were going to be doing today" you smirk.
you begin to hover yourself over jude and give him a nice, gentle, but quick kiss. after the kiss you see him in a smiley mess.
"ready to go?" you ask as you're ready to give him another kiss. "yeah baby i'm ready" he shyly replies. you respond by giving him another quick loving peck. as you try to move back to the passenger seat, he gently grabs you back over to him. 
"can i have another kiss?" he cutely asks. "damn he's making this prank easy enough for me"  you thought. "mmhmm" you replied giving him another.
as jude was driving you both to the mall, you wanted to start up a conversation to rev up the prank. you positioned the camera to where you and jude were on film. "so what are you going to be buying or looking for at the mall?" you asks jude who was eye focused on the road.
"uhm probably look to buy more shoes or maybe buy some new clothes. i also need to head to goyard and get a backpa-" he was cutoff at you picking up his hand and leaving thousands of pecks.
 "...and buy my baby whatever she wants" he looks over to you and smiles like a complete idiot. "wow j" you laugh. "i'm serious tho" he finishes.
after a few minutes, he pulls over to the mall parking lot. "alright. stay here" he tells you as he gets out the car to open up the passenger door. 
as he opens the door, he holds and gently pulls your hand out to help you out the car. "you're so sweet" you tell him. he closes the door behind you and grabs your left hand and you both start to walkout the parking lot. 
as you both make your way up to the entrance, you start talking to the camera again. "alright guys we're here at the mall" you tell the camera "i'm so ready to get new stuff for the trip we're both going on in a few days. the summer is almost over and we gotta finish it off with another nice vaycay" you tell the camera, resting your head onto jude's bicep.
"yeah, we both need a few things, and today we aren't busy with anything so we decided to shop a bit" jude tells the camera. "mmhmm" you hummed.
 to continue on with the prank, you stop walking and tell jude to face you. "gimmie kiss" you request. you stand on your toes and he leans over to give you a quick kiss. "another one" you request again. he chuckles and goes in to gives you another kiss.
"another one" you ask, giggling over his lips. "damn babe" he whispers giving you one after another after another after another. "okay okay okay" you shyly pushing him away, holding his hand walking into the mall entrance.
"okay so first stop, we need to go to target first to buy a few sun care products like sunscreen and body lotion" you tell the camera. "this is also jude's first time at target" you say excitedly.
"where do you need to go to babe?" you asks jude. "after target, we're gonna go over to goyard and buy me a few pieces and then maybe over to nike or something" he replies.
while he was talking to the camera, you start to repeatedly kiss his bicep that your head was once positioned on. he looks down over at you smiling and pulls you closer him as he still talks to the camera.
"here's target" jude tells you. you both walk your way inside and head to the body care isle. "i'm gonna go look for a few things real quick at the men's section, i'll be back" he tells you.
"you're gonna leave me here alone?" you jokingly whine, flipping the camera over to him. "don't be dramatic i'll be back" he laughs. "ok, well meet me back over here" you tell him as you wrap your hands around his body, looking up at him. "you're acting so cute today, i don't know what's up with you" he giggles onto your lips. he gives you a kiss, but you hold on to him tighter, asking him for more. "i want more please" you tells him.
he gives you a few more. "we'll be here forever love" he laughs. "i don't caree" you whine. he wraps his arms around your lower waist and connects his forehead to yours. "i'll be back" he tells you before grabbing your ass with both of his hands, followed by a slap. "jude" you whine, smiling. he laughs and heads over to the men's section.
you start talking back to the camera. "alright guys. so i need to up the prank up a little more. i don't think he's getting on to it, even though he's not supposed to, i need to be a little more needy" you vent to the camera. "maybe i'm just not going to ask him to kiss me. i'm gonna just do it without asking him" you says while looking around making sure he doesn't hear you.
after picking up a few items and telling your subscribers what you had in your hand carrying cart, jude comes up from behind. you turn around and notice. "whatcha get?" you ask facing the camera towards him. "i got some shorts and deodorant" he says looking at the stuff in his hands.
without notice, you gently pull his head down and plants kisses onto his lips. "i missed you" you tell him. he laughs in response. "i was just over there" he says pointing to his past location
"soo? you still left me alone" you tell him leaving more kisses onto his cheek. "babe behave yourself" he whispers towards you.
"give me your stuff babe" he says as you hand him your cart. "look at him holding things for me" you say to the camera, pulling his arm down and kissing him on his cheek a couple of times. "why do you keep pulling me down and kissing me and stuff?" jude laughs.
"i can't kiss my bf?" you question. "you can of course, but damn somethings up. i must've did something good today" jude laughs. "and what would that be?" you cutely questioned. "idk, but you keep giving me kisses so it must to be something" he laughs.
you both made your way up to the self register and jude scans the items. you look over at the camera, getting ready to continue the prank. as he scans the rest of the items, you gently pull his arm down and he looks over to you. "come here" you tells him as you wrap your arms around his neck and stand on you toes to kiss him. "i love you" you tell him.
"what is going on with you babe?" he tells you as he takes out his wallet to finish up paying. "nothing" you blankly reply. "okay?" he says as he puts his card into the card reader, dangerously confused.
you stand behind him as he puts in his four digit code and wrap your arms around his large body and plants small back kisses onto his back. you can feel him laughing due to his body vibrations.
he turns over as he gets the receipt and and puts his wallet back into his pocket. "why are you acting like this" he cups your jaw, giving you multiple kisses onto your lips, sending you into a giggling frenzy.
"no-thing i- ju-st l-ov-e yo-u" you try to speak through each kiss. "how many more do you need because it seems to be that you need more every time" he replies pulling you into a hug.
"it's nothing. lets go and get what you need" you finally tell him as you he the bag full of your items and both making your way back into the mall.
"alright guys, now we are going to go to- where are we going?" you ask jude. "uhm i need some shoes so lets get that over with" he tells you.
you looks over at him and pucker up your lips insinuating you want another kiss, while holding the camera. "again?" he whispers.
"yes" you reply pouting. you pucker your lips back again and he gives you a kiss. "another one" you request. "come on, we can't keep doing this" he laughs.
"you don't like kissing me?" you pout trying to get to him "no baby, it's never like that, but you're being needy right now... and were in public" jude tells you as you both walk your way into nike.
"no, you just don't like kissing me" you tell him pouting. "now you know that's not true" he finishes as you were both greeted by a hello from a nike clerk.
"hello, would you guys like any help today" the clerk asks. "uhm could you show us the new releases?" jude asks while holding your hand. "yes i can, follow me" the clerk responds.
you pick up jude's hand that was locked to yours and placed millions of kisses onto it. he looks back over to you confused. "are you okay?" he whispers laughing. "yes?" you reply, sneaking in a few laughs into the camera.
"okay, here are the new releases. you can choose from any of these. is there one in particular that you like?" the clerk asked jude. "yeah um... that one right there" jude points. "size?" the clerk asks. "size 12 should be good" he responds. "i'll go ahead and get them for you".
as the clerk went to the back, jude looked over at you. "what" you started laughing. "you're just acting weird i don't know" he confusedly responds.
"no im not" you reply to him. you both stare at each other for a few seconds until the clerk comes back. "here you go. try them out and see if they're okay" the clerk responded. "yeah" jude replies.
you had the idea to do the funniest thing ever. "can i have a kiss" you ask jude infront of the clerk. he laughs to cover up the embarrassment and so does the clerk. jude turns around to where his back was faced to the clerk. "what are you doing?" he says through his teeth, obviously embarrassed.
"what, can i just have a kiss?" you reply laughing. he heads down over to you and gives you a quick kiss. jude then tries on the shoes and tells the clerk they fit well.
after the clerk takes the shoe jude tried on and the other shoes he picked, they all make their way to the register. you look over to your camera sending off smirks. "total is $654.89" the clerk says.
after jude pays for the shoes, the clerk then ask for a picture with jude because he was a fan. right after they taken the pic, both you and jude waved bye to the clerk.
as they were walking out the store, you look over at jude and sneaks in a laugh into the camera. "ok so where to next?" you asks him while holding the camera. "you did that to me infront of the clerk who was a fan?? are you insane" jude spills as you too were in shock of what just happened.
you both are now walking throughout the mall. "do you want me to kiss you before i do anything?" he says sarcastically. "no, but i do want you to tell them where you want to go next" you playfully respond.
"i need to go get the backpa-" jude was cutoff by you asking for a kiss. "babe what is wrong with you?" jude says with a concerning face. he complies anyway by giving you another kiss.
as you both make there way into goyard, you look over at the bags they had. as he looks through their selection, you slide your way into jude's embrace and rests your chin on his chest. you look up at him and gently pull his neck down for a kiss. jude holds you tightly and gives you a nice, passionate kiss followed by many more pecks.
"baby, do we need to go home?" he asks sincerely. "we can come back tomorrow" he tells you. "no no we have to get everything now" you pout. "then why do you keep kissing me baby?" he whines. "becauseee" you drag as you pull him down for more kisses.
"alright we're going home" he says as he drags you out the store. "no wait jude jude stop" you say while laughing. "you can't keep kissing me out here, lets just go home" he tells you.
"no no i was just pranking you its a prank" you laugh. "what you mean?" jude questions. "i kept kissing you. that was the prank" you laugh. "it doesn't matter we're leaving" he says quickly guiding you both out mall.
"whyy?" you whine. "i don't want to shop anymore, and you keep on kissing me so now were going home" he looks over to you. "i was just joking, we can shop normally now" you laugh following him back to the car.
"well i'm not in the mood for shopping right now anyway, and now we have to get home now so i can deal with you" he calmly tells, pulling you close to his side.
"wow guys" you tell the camera, "i tell him i'm pranking and now he wants to go home" you laugh. "you know you want to go home, too" he tells you. "i mean yeah if that means i'm getting fcked but we still need to shop" you responds laughing.
"you were playing around with me and now i'm in the mood for something else. you did this to yourself" he scoffs. you knew that playing pranks like these would get you into these types of trouble. but it was safe to say your prank was a success.
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old-school-butch · 17 hours
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Hello again <3
I sent you an anon that you replied to on April 1st, which was me asking how ex-TIFs are received back into womanhood. Your reply gave me a little foothold which ended up very comforting as I started coming out rapid-fire to all my friends as detrans. this is primarily a message for other people in my situation, who are afraid and might want a template of what you might expect will happen once you do come out with it.
Predictably, most of my friends dropped me; I've 3 friends left. Two of which continue to support trans people but can accept that i have different opinions (as long as i'm "not mean") and one of which has seen the gender critical arguments, accepted them, and agrees. So, heavy losses, but not total losses. My two siblings seemed to sigh in relief and reveal that they never believed in genderism at all, which is odd, because in my 10 years of being trans not one of them challenged me on it. my mom fell into heavy guilt over "letting me" do all this, although i was 18 when i took testo and 19 when i got surgery, so she really could not have stopped me, legally. i suppose she mainly grieves knowing that had she had the right arguments she could have saved her kid this, but i've told her she is not to blame and i hope she recognizes that.
i haven't received any real harassment, not from anyone that i PERSONALLY know, though my family has received... harassment targeted at me? my sister had a classmate begin sending her copious pro-trans propaganda (contrapoints videos) which she instructed should be sent onward to me (sis did not comply). hilarious how my 10 years of direct experience is suddenly null and void and i'm assumed to know nothing about transness.... 6 months ago i was helping people sensitivity-write trans characters. now, i'm told i can't speak for the trans experience at all, and that i do not know what it's like to be a transmasc person. told that i need to listen to the arguments more carefully, that i don't LISTEN, when i literally lived this for 10 whole years. girl, on god? they tell me i don't get it and need to educate myself. and have empathy of course.
but in general, detransing, i've discovered that there are PLENTY of people who do not actually believe in genderism but who will play along simply out of fear or social pressure. my friends aside, who i knew through "queer" circles, everyone in my family (expect my mom) has revealed they never actually believed in it. i think this might contribute to why trans people bully dissenters so badly. they know this is the truth, that no one really buys it. i think, subconsciously, i have known that too. i never downloaded grindr, i never went into the men's bathrooms. i knew that despite testo and surgery and pronouns i could never challenge men as an equal in their eyes.
interestingly, making new friends is not that hard. I lead with the fact i'm detrans and "don't believe in all that shit" and people are VERY eager to be able to, suddenly, voice their real opinions without being called transphobic. they begin with probing questions, uncontroversial statements like "i agree they shouldn't put males in women's sports..." but if you continue to agree and not punish this daring on their part, they will reveal, with much relief and enthusiasm, what they really think. most people, normal people, really do not believe it all? i'm a brash person and can take irl confrontations quite well, hence i feel safe putting myself up as a transphobe off the bat. and people are very into this. so. the old ass saying, just be yourself.... normal people will not volunteer anti-genderist opinions on their own but when i continue to state thing after thing they open up and agree and eventually feel safe enough to admit their own thoughts. making friends, especially with non-gendie women, hasn't been that hard.
i'm going to write another message about same-sex attraction in the genderverse, but it's also a can of worms so i will make it separate from this one. again, thank you so much, for having anon on and listening, and letting us listen to each other without fear. i would hug you. to be continued
Thanks for the follow up!
My only comment is that I think most people play along out of kindness, it's not all bullying and fear, but that does impose a silence on everyone so everyone feels quite alone with their doubts.
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bloodyshadow1 · 1 day
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for the multiclassers with their level up to 14 there are options
Fabian is currently a level 6 fighter battlemaster/7 swords bard. getting a level in fighter means getting a battlemaster feature Know your Enemy. Which honestly I feel is underused in most dnd games, but can be very good for him where he's in school and has a much easier chance to observe potential enemies like the Ratgrinders. If he takes a level in bard, he doesn't get that much as it is an ability score level up so potentially he could get his 18 in charisma to 20, or he could get a feat. If he does go this route I think he should take a feat since Fabian's charisma is great already and he doesn't really use his spells in combat that much compared to the casters, he mostly uses it to get smites from Fandragor. There are a lot of cool feats that he could pick if he went this route, like sentinel that he had then lost in Sophomore year. Of course, there are other reasons to take a level, sometimes the most important thing is to take a level in a class to get closer to a higher level class feature. They don't have many more combats/episodes left, probably 1 before the finale so they could potentially have another level up. at 9th level get gets access to a 5th level spell.
Gorgug is in a similar space as Fabian, he's a 6 barbarian berserker/7 artificer barbificier. taking a level in barbarian would give him access to feral instinct that he lost when he took artificer levels. Advantage on initiative is good, but he's had disadvantage on initiative since he started getting stress tokens so I'm not sure how important that is to Zac. The level in Artificer won't give him much as it's an ability score level. He could boost his strength up to 20 to max it out or get his int to 18 for his artificer stuff. Or he could take a feat and then who knows what he's going to do. Of course, he could take 2 levels in artificer by becoming a 5 barbarian, and become a 9th level artificer to show off a feature of his new homebrewed subclass. I don't think he should since he would lose mindless rage that has saved him quite a few times and high level dnd has a lot of weird mind magic that can frighten and charm. As the biggest guy on the field he's the likely target. As we don't know much about Gorgug's barbificer subclass it could be worth it or it might not be.
Fig is more complicated since she has 3 classes, 10 lore bard/1 hexblade warlock/2 paladin. First off, I don't think she's going to take a warlock level, eldritch invocations are great, but she had them before and gave up a level of warlock for paladin. She seems to like the concept of Warlock, but mechanically it doesn't do much for her, the single level of hexblade is all she needs to be an awesome melee bard. Taking a level in bard would make sense given that we still have to see the outcome of her 30 or so roll on her new song. And doing so would give her access to 6th level spells. Also in regards to bard, I don't think Fig is going to switch her subclass again to swords or valor to get an extra attack. She might, but as a lore bard her magical secrets she gets have served her well, it's the reason she was able to use revify and counterspell. She has the normal magical secrets from being a bard, but who knows if she'd be willing to part with spells for another attack since Emily loves her spells. If she takes a 3rd level in paladin she'll be taking her oath, which is important to her story and what she's been struggling with. I'm not sure if she'd take a level this time or after their second to last fight, it might be more important for her then as a climax. She would get a class feature and honestly I could see it being a homebrewed feature since she doesn't really fit into any of the oaths currently available. Maybe conquest or redemption given how her storyline in intertwined with Ankarna, but who knows given how open Brennan is with homebrew. I also don't think Fig is going to give up her bard levels to get to 5 paladin by the end of the season. Her magical secrets she gets as a bard at 10 are just too good to pass up, she'd lose at least summon greater steed and another spell which I don't think would be worth it.
I am very excited to see how things turn out tonight to see how they level up.
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drivestraight · 23 hours
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good morning val drivestraight I have a question for you... can you sell me on lestappen. I follow you for general attitude swag and don't really follow many max blogs (I actually found your blog after that omega George fic lol) but I feel like you of all people could make the greatest ship primer. mostly I'm not very into it bc I feel like the shared history part of it gets overblown by fandom compared to other ships, and they're friendly enough these days that I can't get hatesex vibes form it + Max comes across as really well adjusted and kind of an homeboy. so I'm like what's the hook? what do you like? what's YOUR platonic perfect idea of lestappen? I want to follow u down this road 
omg what an honor...
this isn't much of a ship primer but mostly about me talking about why i like them if that's okay <3
i agree that we overplay their shared history, but it also provides a really nice backdrop for everything they are now. they've always been in each other's lives but in a peripheral sense. and it's that sort of distanced familiarity that is compelling to me. also the potential for intense physicality despite their inability to communicate like normal people. that's the hook to me: they are in each other's orbit but they never have been close. but then you get to the racing: and when it comes to the racing, they've really given some great battles. and that alone isn't enough. it's like - combined with who they are off the track: childhood rivals turned awkward work friends, the fact that they can race that hard and that they respect one another so much is just. so good. sometimes it feels like they can predict each other's moves. like silverstone/austria 19 (yes, mentioned to hell) and bahrain/saudi 22, the w2w there went crazy. and once again, this with everything else: that they have this one place and this one medium for them to communicate at such a high level, and are just so awkward everything else is very good. lewis and seb who have said in the past that max goes over the limit too much, while charles has always said with max, it's always on the limit and never above. obviously things might change if they ever get into a real title fight against one another, but i think they have such great foundations that it will be compelling no matter what. also they've lowkey like stood the test of time: look at how people characterized them in 2019 and how they characterize them today. they've changed so much and their relationship has changed so much but still, both of them are at two top teams, they have found each other again in f1.
also aesthetically, the red/blue of it all is really nice. and just like. They look good together. yknow
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they also like. say crazy things about each other sometimes. "i will remember it all my life" / "i know max very very well" / etc. etc.
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my perfect platonic idea of lestappen Is Not one where they're best friends and where max is his number 1 defender - because he is not, as many people would have you believe (everyone clipping moments from cooldown rooms and quotes from interviews are putting it out of context and putting words in max's mouth and twisting things weirdly), and because that's frankly so uncompelling and kind of pathetic to think that charles needs max to praise him/defend him for him to have any worth as a racer etc. etc. i could go on about this for ages but i won't. tldr max doesn't care enough to do that.
IN FIC my favorite lestappen is basically: an awkward lestappen who like each other so much and can't actually communicate it properly in any way that isn't physical. but maybe the physicality and the shared history and the racing can be enough.
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shigarakis-cumdump · 3 days
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Hi! I was wondering if you could do a wholesome Shigaraki headcannon.
I wanna know how he tells y/n his feelings for them, and the journey of how he developed them. I think it's such a cute idea, and I would love to read your input on it!
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(If you like what you read, consider supporting me on Ao3!)
Title: A Villain's Origin of Love
Summary: A short hc of how Shigaraki came to fall in love with you. He was never good with words, and a crush didn't help.
Cw: none
Word Count: 1k
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
When you first joined the Liberation, Shigaraki hated you. He figured you were just another fan that would leave the second things became serious, just like they all did. He would observe you from a distance, never even introducing himself to you since he figured it was a waste of time. When you stuck around after a few months, you were already well acquainted with everyone, except for him. 
The other members would rave about you, telling him funny things you did and how thoughtful you were of the other members. He knew this, or course; having watched you for the better part of 3 months helped him understand just who you were. 
His skepticism started to fade when he saw you helping Toga after a battle. Usually, everyone would patch themselves up, but you jumped in to help her and other members before even helping yourself. He admired your selflessness. Another time, he watched you from behind the door as you were blissfully humming while you patched up Touya’s clothes he had destroyed a day prior. Shigaraki felt something when he saw you in these quiet moments, and he didn’t like the feeling. He felt warm on the inside, something he had never felt before. Surely he was distancing himself enough, so why was he feeling this? Was it some type of quirk you had and didn’t mention? 
“Um, Shigaraki sir?” He was taken out of his thoughts by the sound of your voice echoing from the room. When he looked up, he saw you staring at him, a slight smile on your face.
“What are you doing?” He asked, opening the door and stepping towards you.
“Oh, just repairing Dabi’s jacket. Did you need something repaired as well? Or need me for a mission?” You asked.
“N-No, just don’t fuck it up, I don’t want another singed member walking around.” He replied as he quickly left. Shigaraki got back to his room and cursed himself for not taking you up on your offer. He wanted to talk to you, but he was nervous. The leader of the biggest villain organization was nervous to talk to a girl of all things. Not having a reason to talk to you, he looked around his room for something, anything, he could give you to fix, just so he could stay in the room and watch you, at the very least. 
After not finding anything, he takes his coat off and rips it apart in several places. Heading back to your room, he hears you talking with someone on the other side of the door. He lost his chance to get you alone to talk to you. He leaves his coat outside your door and decides to take a walk around the base. 
It’s been hours and instead of thinking of battle plans, all that fills his mind are thoughts of you. He remembers the day you tried talking to him when you first joined and he ignored you, mentally beating himself up over it. He got to know how kind you were, and as selfish as it was, wanted some of that for himself. He found you pretty too, not that his ego would let him admit that. He started to imagine a life where it was just you and him, living normally amongst society, no villainy, just- 
“Shigaraki!” 
The sound of your voice made him come to a standstill. Turning around, he saw you running up to him with his coat. 
“I finished patching up your coat for you! I saw you left it outside my door,” you tell him. 
“Thanks,” he says, hesitant to take it back, scared the conversation might end. “What are you doing right now?”
“Well I just finished with your coat, so nothing, I suppose. Why, did you need something?”
“You’ve been here for a while and I never got the chance to talk to you.”
You smile and start to walk alongside him, “Talk to me about what?”
He sighs, taking his coat, “I don’t know,” he pauses, “just, about you, I guess.” He clears his throat, only being able to stare at the ground. 
The two of you talk for hours, walking all around the base as you lose track of time. He got to know more about you, your life before the Liberation, and why you decided to join. It was safe to say he was falling for you, but there was no way he was going to tell you that. Not now, at least. 
After that, the two of you became friends, and you would help him with things. In return, you would find little gifts scattered around the base with a poorly written note saying, “for Y/N, from Tomura.” You would always thank him the next time you saw him, and you noticed the way he would look at you with love in his eyes, the shy mannerisms he would display when around you, and you thought it was cute. But lord knows you could never ask the leader of a villain organization to be with you, it was out of line. 
Thankfully, Shigaraki was already a step ahead of you. He told you to meet him in his office one night with no other details. Usually, he would talk to you when he saw you, but the whole day he had been ignoring you and avoiding you like the plague. Your mind was filled with anxiety, nervous he would say you did something wrong and exile you out of the Liberation. However, when you knocked on his door that night, he opened it and you saw a teddy bear and heart shaped necklace with an engraved “T” on it in his hands. 
“Y/N,” he starts, trying his best to maintain eye contact as his face beamed bright red, “you know I’m not good with words, but.. Do you want to be with me? Be my girlfriend?” 
You chuckle at his confession, your face now matching the shade of his. “Yes, Tomura, I thought you would never ask.”
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doki-doki-imagines · 15 hours
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hello! I am the person who requested that reader with a cat who likes the boys a lot if u remember that request.
may I request (if ur not uncomfortable with it) some period comfort with an afab!reader (they/them pls) just taking care and helping reader with their period? if it's not too much can u also include reader sleeping a lot and craving lots of food (typical ik) and how reader just gets mad rlly easily.
characters: bi-han, syzoth, shang tsung, kenshi, raiden and liu kang
thank u and have a good day :) (smiling through the pain)
author note: I'm super late, but I suppose it's better than never. Hope you'll like these! Link to the cat post
Kenshi Takahashi: -He…He can smell when you are on your period. -Actually Kenshi can even tell when it is coming so he is always ready with food when it finally comes. -He tries to keep your pelvis warm and treat you softly since your body gets sore way more easily. -Kenshi goes a bit insane when you're ovulating, so now he is more calm and soft. -He'll try to make your mean comments slide, but it is hard for him, so it's better not to exaggerate, or Kenshi will snap back.
Raiden: -Really sweet and understand your needs. -But Raiden won't be a sticky boyfriend. He has work to do and won't take a day off. -When he finally understands how this period works for you, he will be prepared for the next one. -Your fave food? Check. Warm beverages? Check. Cover and 3 different kinds of movies to match your current mood? Check. -When Raiden gets home tho he is all for you. He likes to put you in his arms and draw circles on your hand, waiting for you to fall asleep on his chest. -Mean words are nothing to him. A king of taking the hit and making it slide off him.
Liu Kang: -"You bastard! Couldn't you erase menstruation while creating this world?" You whine into his arms, cramps making you curl in his body.
"Would you rather lay eggs, dear one?" Liu Kang replies, with a smile on his face, forefinger lifting your chin up to make you look into his brilliant eyes.
"You are just a meanie." You snap back, pushing his face away from yours, making a laughter blossom in his throat. -He tries not to make you eat too much junk food, but he'll back off when you look at him with fury in your eyes. -His body is better than any cover.
Bi-Han: -I'm sorry, but he would be pretty cold. -He was raised in a way that even if you were dying, you should take care of yourself without the help of anybody, so at max, he'll send your way a doctor. -Bi-Han has to work A LOT on being a normal human. He really doesn't know how to work around normal feelings that are outside his field of work. -And the future grandmaster lessons he has been given as a kid never focused on helping his partner out. It is already much that he decided who to be with. -Bi-Han probably knows very little about how menstruation works, mostly because they taught him not to care about other people and just think about how to be the perfect Lin Kuei's leader. -First work on making him act as a decent human, then Bi-Han will even make you a special tea to make your cramps less painful. -And if you look particularly pitiful he may snuck junk food too…
Syzoth: -The first time he saw you losing blood, he panicked because "Why are you losing blood?!?!" -After you explain how things work, Syzoth will let out a breath of relief. -Surprisingly, he understands pretty well that losing blood is a pain, so he doesn't mind following your order like a butler. -Syzoth is gonna snuggle under the covers with you, btw. -Not used to you being mean tho, even if he understands you aren't fine, he still takes those words personally.
Shang Tsung: -Actually, he'd make a potion to make your cramps fade. -But he doesn't do anything for nothing…are you ready to try his next experiments? Maybe the potion isn't as safe as he says. -Shang Tsung satisfies your cravings, but don't nag too much, or he'll get annoyed. -Also, don't be mean, or he will snap back, then you'll start to cry, and actually Shang Tsung has a weakness: your tears. Then he'll have to try to make you stop, but sadly, another mean word slips…it's an endless cycle that makes him think just "Hope this will end soon."
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AITA for telling my friend she should break up with her boyfriend?
📣To find it
So I (16, autistic) have known my friend (16F) for like 3 years now, about 6 months ago she started dating her boyfriend (18M, 17 when they started dating) and originally it seemed pretty healthy and I was super happy for her, but over time she's started to bring up a LOT of red flags.
The things i can think of off the top of my head are him telling her little lies for no reason, being rlly flirty with other girls, not talking to her unless she starts the conversation, shitting on her for eating when she was with his friends at lunch and they weren't eating, saying that since they already talked ab a problem (him being flirty w other girls mainly) she shouldn't bring it up, just weird stuff like that.
When this stuff started happening i would tell her genuinely what i thought when she'd ask for advice, I'd normally tell her to talk to him about it and set boundaries or communicate what she wants more or things in that vein but the more he did and the more upset she was about it the more serious i got and eventually when she asked for advice I'd tell her that obviously she didn't need to but hes like,,, continuously crossing her boundaries and being inconsiderate and she shouldn't put up with that just because shes dating him.
she's said herself that she's almost constantly upset about things hes doing and it just doesn't feel healthy and i dont want to just sit back while my friend is in a harmful relationship. She keeps insisting that he'll get better and that she doesn't wanna break up because she loves him and i don't want to overstep or seem like im demanding her do something but also i dont wanna just sit back and watch it happen, but I can't tell if im being an asshole or not. A few people (mostly people who are also friends with her boyfriend) have said im overstepping but a lot of my other friends have said im not so i just dont know. I try my hardest to not seem demanding but i don't wanna end up hurting her by trying to help. Advice would be much appreciated whether or not i am the asshole
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