Tumgik
#i only knew because i’ve been a flash fan for a long time
elexaria · 26 days
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living with ghoap was nice. two big burly fellas to keep you company, to reach the top shelves in the kitchen for you, to absolutely plough you into the mattress when you couldnt itch your own scratch for once. they were good lads.
but there were countless times where they’d be away for work, so you knew you couldnt be fully dependent on them. they knew that too, so they weren’t exactly going to object to you having fun without them. so long as you were happy and safe, they were content.
but fuck, the men out there are absolutely horrible to deal with. sleazy, there’s just… no ability to have any kind of banter with these things that think only with their cocks.
until you meet kilgöre alexander.
he’s gigantic, his shoulders probably share the same width as mount everest’s base. easily, kilgöre is the tallest man you’ve ever been with. he dwarfs simon in size, which is very telling in itself.
it’s hard to pry away at who kilgöre is as a person. he’s austrian, likes keeping himself to himself. absolutely refuses to tell you what he does for a living, because it’s on a need to know basis. “sounds like something a terrorist would say.” you jokingly coo one night at dinner, smirking as he rolls his foggy blue eyes at your comment. “har har, very funny.” he mockingly says, the corners of his lips twitching ever so slightly.
he’s one of the best things that’s happened to you in a while. he doesn’t know about the particular living arrangement you share with simon and johnny— like he says, it’s on a need to know basis. plus, you haven’t boned either of them since you met this fella. ghoap know what’s up, but they’re not bothered by it. they’re just glad to see you doing well for yourself. “ye have a glow about ye, love.” johnny coos in your ear one day, smirking as he watches you fluster and flounder around the kitchen, trying to make excuses. “it’s the vitamins i’m taking” this and “i’ve quit dairy” that. he knows the truth, simon know its too.
but there’s one thing that makes the attachment to this man absolutely unbearable.
he disappears from time to time.
some days it’s only a couple of days, maybe a couple of weeks at a push. absolutely no contact.
he swears it’s to do with his line of work, that one day he’ll be able to tell you everything. but for now, he asks just for one thing.
“just… wait for me.”
it’s been almost a month with no contact from kilgöre, and it feels like every morning with no text, no nothing, you have a growing pit inside of you that can’t stop gnawing at you, eating you up whole. what the fuck? what could he possibly do for a career that makes it so he goes days without checking his phone? it makes you feel sick to your stomach. what if he’s in a gang or something?
besides, how the fuck can you keep on waiting for someone who you don’t even know is even alive? for all you know, this behemoth of a man has been hog tied and dumped at the bottom of a lake with cinder blocks strapped to his feet. how are you supposed to wait for someone who shows no signs of leaving or coming back?
“that light in yer eyes has dulled.” johnny remarks one evening, a sad smile on his lips. your eyebrows knit together, feigning confusion. “huh? oh, yeah. uh… it’s the gluten intolerance i reckon.” you murmur to yourself, flashing a weak smile to consolidate his inquisitive gaze. “i’m fine, though.”
simon huffs as he leers next to you, skilfully flaying pieces of fish with a pensive look. both you and johnny glance at him, which only makes him grunt in response. you furrow your eyebrows at him, urging him to elaborate on what the pressing issue is.
“we reckon shit’s hit the fan with that new bloke of yours.” simon bluntly replies as he wipes off the chopping board with a damp cloth, hands gently scooping up guts, scales and delicate fish bones to dispose of. you scoff, eyes never leaving the cuts of fish meat that rest on a plate, waiting to be delicately battered and fried up.
“whatev—“
“and i know you, you’ll try and refute the truth that i know what’s going on. that we know what’s going on. so, none of this nonsense, alright? what’s up?”
johnny and simon silently watch you, their simultaneous waiting for any reaction from you making your skin crawl. at first, you scowl and huff. shifting your weight from foot to foot as you become defensive. simon cuts you off again, “none of that bollocks. tell the truth.”
you give in. on bated breath, you explain the whole situation. how kilgöre is the kind of man you had never expected to fall for, how he had managed to steal your attention even while being so elusive and secretive. how you desperately want him to come back to you, like he said he would.
johnny frowns, and simon nods in your direction, wiping his blood stained hands with the damp cloth. “fishy hands.” he murmurs, wiggling his fingers to prove he can’t comfort you with a hug. johnny nods, swiftly making his way around the kitchen island to come give you a warm hug. it’s a solid hug, one you’d never object to having. johnny’s large hands rub circles to your back, his bearded chin resting against your shoulder as he sways gently.
simon stands behind johnny, holding eye contact with you as he continued to carefully clean his hands. he raises his eyebrows in thought, before glancing down at his fingernails as he begins to meticulously clean underneath them to rid his skin of all things fish.
“this… kilgöre bloke. i reckon if he’s the one, he’s worth waitin’ for. but don’t think for a second he should get away with leavin’ you this long without so much as a text, yeah? rip ‘im a new one when he comes back.” he advises, glancing back up at you with a slight smirk when he hears you chuckle, your laugh strained with emotion.
he steps closer, carefully tilting your chin up so you can meet his gaze better. he gently wipes a stray tear from your cheek. “if he’s the man you think he is, he’ll explain everything if you ask him to. and if he does? great. if he doesn’t?” you wince at the idea, frowning.
he sighs, pressing a gentle kiss to your brow.
“then he’s a bloody eejit, as our johnny boy would say.”
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cherryredstars · 5 months
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Hi! I’ve been following you for a while, not so long, but for a while, and I just wanted to say I am absolutely in love with your Miguel fan fics. Especially the one that stars female!miguel in too, absolutely love it. I have a little request of my own, but if you feel uncomfortable with this one no need to do it🫶🏻.
So, I basically just wanted a hypersexual!reader x Miguel. I personally suffer with hypersexual disorder to my own reason. I’m not sure how to explain what hypersexual is, so you can just search it up (sorry!!😭)
I kinda want it to still be apart of spiderman arc (Miguel is still spider man 2099 and reader is also spider women/man)
Miguel can find out reader is hypersexual by her/him file or smth like that, I’m not sure how to explain it😣
If you feel uncomfortable by this request, no need to do it and no pressure :)
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Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x spider gn!reader
Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Smut, Reader is Hypersexual, Genital Examination, Mentions of Oral Sex, Penetrative Sex, and Sexual Fantasies
Summary: Miguel has always been good with examining disorders.
A/N: It’s okay anon!! I already know what hypersexuality is because samesies!!!
Word Count: 615 (Not Edited)
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He knew. 
He practically knew everything with his discovery of the multiverse and LYLA by his side. So it didn’t surprise you when he had cornered you, questioning you about the hypersexuality notes in your file. It did leave you embarrassed, a stuttering fool with blazing cheeks and a tongue that couldn’t articulate anything. He had asked you if it would affect your performance, if you’d be too distracted to be on the field. You had hastily disagreed, assuring him that you’d be at peak performance on any and all missions you’d be on. He left you with a grumbling, ‘I’ll make sure of that’ and a flashing visual of his rough body pressed against yours. 
You had never imagined his I’ll make sure of that would be him dealing with it personally. Physically. Before every mission you went on. 
Everytime he pulls you into a lab, pressing your front down on a lab table as he performs his…examination. His chest pressing against your back, your suit pooling around your ankles as his hand slips between your legs. His hand, large and rough, cups you entirely, massaging your throbbing sex. Soft whines and moans escape you as his hands get drenched with your arousal. It's sticky, staining your skin and making squelching noises that make you embarrassed. Everytime you try to squirm away, he grunts and presses you harder against the flat surface, mumbling something about not being done. 
He continues his examination, fingers touching and massaging every part of your sex. He takes extra care with your slit, pressing his fingers to it until you're whining and on the edge of release. Some days, he lets you finish and others he edges you until he gets bored. But his examination is never the end of it. He always presses more into you, his hard erection pressing to your bare ass as he whispers into your ear. 
Tell me. Tell me what sick little fantasies your dirty mind thought of today. 
And as per routine, you do. In a whimpering and needy voice, you list out all the thoughts you can remember as he hums absentmindedly. He always tsks when you're finished, cooing about how he needs to get rid of those thoughts before you can be cleared for duty. His suit disintegrates, leaving him naked and twitchy behind you. His erection is always rock hard and swollen, throbbing against your ass as he preps your hole. He swears he’s your miracle cure, the only one that can help you momentarily stop those thoughts and keep your body satisfied. He drills it into you, syncing each word with a thrust that blurs your mind. 
He’ll spend all the time he has before you have to go running through your list of fantasies, leaving each one fulfilled or until you’ve cummed so much that you have nothing else to give. And even then, if you’re still greedy and not fully satisfied, he’ll continue to play with your body. He plays with your sex, drinks up your arousal until he swallows it down, or continues his numbing thrusts until your body is a shaking and unstable mess. And, when you’re satisfied, when all thoughts are erased, he’ll pull away from your body. His suit reappears as he helps zip up yours. 
When the both of you leave, he pressed up right behind you, whispering in your ear how he’ll see you for your next check up. And your mind drones on and on about the new fantasies and scenarios, your body becoming insatiable again. 
You always seem to be in need of an examination sooner rather than later, and Miguel is always prepared to administer them.
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saintslewis · 9 months
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❝ it’s the soul that needs a surgery ❞
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pairing: lewis hamilton x black!fem reader
summary: you’ve never felt a shared pain worse than what Abu Dhabi have given you and Lewis.
warnings: this entire drabble is based on AD21, cuss words, lots of crying, mean words said by mean people, slight…everything atp.
saint’s notes: feeling a bit sad after watching a Lewis edit where he still smiles even after AD21 and still stays positive and that just breaks my heart so i’ve decided to break yours 🫵🏽
taglist: @thisismeracing (thank you love), @flowerchild-96 (for your kindness)
-
The heat in Jeddah was unbearable and everyone seemed to be affected by it but chose to continue with whatever they were busy. As media followed you to the buzzing Mercedes garage, you took out your phone to inform your husband that you’ve arrived and will be waiting for him with Angela.
Your confidence had reached an all time high from the moment you landed in Abu Dhabi. It was a day of the champion spirit to float around the Hamilton household once again, a day for Lewis to win his 8th World Championship and for him to continue his legacy as the greatest driver that Formula One has ever seen. You refused to think anything negative about this race but something in the back of your head kept itching to argue your positive feelings about it. He had hyped himself up for today and you joined him, knowing that everything would go well.
Spotting your father in law, Anthony, standing outside the garage made you sigh of relief, knowing you could safely offload your thoughts to someone who most likely had the same thoughts as you in concern for your husband. “Hey Anthony.” You greeted as you walked up to him with his arms ready to envelop you in a hug. “Y/n! How are you feeling? It’s quite hot here, isn’t it?” He commented, looking over at the busy pit lane.
“I’m feeling confident. Surprised there’s no ice cream station around.” You joked and he flashed a smile. “Oh, there is, in the paddock club. Made sure to check for you.” Anthony smiled and you could only flash a smile back. “Hey, don’t stress about it, Y/n. Everything will be okay, even if he doesn’t get it and that’s a very big if.” He assured and you took a breath in, not wanting to seem negative. “The Red Bull’s are the ones stressing me because they’re just everywhere but like you said, I shouldn’t stress. Now, would you like some ice cream?” You asked and he nodded. “Need a little pick me up. I’ll be here when you get back.” Anthony responded and walked back into the garage.
By the time you had arrived to the paddock, it had been quite full so it was clear that the paddock club would be as full with many different people from all around the world. You waved to whoever seemed to want your attention, stopping to take pictures with fans or sign autographs all while having your airpods in, a habit you gladly took from Lewis. You knew people would talk about you, what you’re wearing, what you say and being quiet, just like your husband, has helped you a ton in terms of not taking your words out of context. Did SkySports F1 always have close ups of you during races just to see your reaction to anything? Yes but you never engaged unless it was to a smile or a wink to the camera.
Entering the paddock club with two of your security personnel, your long blonde braids swiftly followed behind you and it caught the attention of many, especially a woman who never really liked you or your husband. “Oh my! Y/n! Hi!” The shrill voice behind you had exclaimed to you, hearing their heeled footsteps come close to you. “Kelly, hello.” You smiled but anyone around you could see that the smile never reached your eyes. “Just came over to see your hair and wow, what a statement!” She giggled and she reached her hand out and inched her hand closer and closer to your braids but you moved away as quickly as you could. “Always have something to say.” You muttered to yourself as you turned towards the makeshift ice cream parlour.
“Also wanted to say good luck for today with Red Bull and Mercedes being head to head, y’know? Speaking of your hair, I saw a couple of hair ties that reminded of the two of you-”
“Okay Kelly! Just…stop commenting on our hair, our jewellery or just anything that involves my husband and I.” You sighed out. The look on her face was of shock and disbelief that you would even dare to speak up to her. You flicked your braids behind you and grabbed the two cups of ice cream after paying. Walking out of there in a quick pace, you kept your face neutral and made your way to the Mercedes garage with no one bothering you.
Giving Anthony his ice cream up in a hurry, he observed your face and immediately directed you to where Lewis was, his drivers room. Knocking on his door, you heard a ‘come in’ and entered, seeing him seated with his race suit around his waist and his airpods in just like you. He faced you and his face lit up at the sight of you. “Hey, love. You look so beautiful.” He complimented you and you smiled but it didn’t quite reach your eyes once again. “Let me guess. Someone criticising your looks?” He guessed and you could only nod at him before crashing into his chest and him hugging you right back, feeling the warmth of him envelop you.
“It’s not even about that because people always have something to say. It’s a specific sloth’s girlfriend that’s pissing me off.” Lewis squeezed you within the hug. “Don’t call him that.” You could hear the laugh creeping up but he chose not to. “It’s not me, it’s the internet. She tried to touch my hair then said some shit about hair ties and you know I could beat a bitch up and then she was on some “good luck” type shit-”
“Y/n.” Lewis called out and held your face in your hands. “They want you to stoop down to their level then drag your name all over. Everything will be fine, especially today. As long as I have you and my family beside, I already feel like I have won.” He smiled and gave you a peck before looking into your eyes. “You’re so corny but so sweet, Sir.” You said, fluttering your eyelashes at him and he chuckled while looking to the side.
“You are a dangerous woman, Mrs Hamilton.”
-
The silence around the Mercedes garage was unsettling once the drivers got to the last two laps of the race. Lewis and Max were head to head with the Red Bull going suspiciously faster. You stood next to Toto and Anthony, tearing your eyes away from the screen to look at the person who’s eyes were piercing into you. There were multiple cameras around you so you couldn’t see clearly at whoever was staring at you. Looking back at the screen, all your hope poured out to Lewis, praying to whoever was listening that he should win.
Your heart seemed to stop at the very moment the world saw Verstappen cross the finish line and hearing the cheers of the Red Bull garage not too far from you. A few groans spewed out of a few engineers as they began to get ready for Lewis to come back after the podium celebration. It seemed as if the cameras came close to you as a single tear slipped out of your left eye, face stoic as ever. You blocked out everything that happened around you. Toto becoming angry, Anthony urging you to come with him to see Lewis, your phone continuously buzzing but all you could do was stare at the screen as you watched Lewis park the car and his helmet dropped down as you saw people cheering behind his car.
Your throat felt closed up and goosebumps run through your body. You felt nauseous but chose to keep it down, knowing you would not be able to even breathe when you see him. You walked out of the garage only to see other drivers coming out of their garages and Lando and Sebastian walking towards the Mercedes garage, mainly towards you.
“Seb..” You muttered out and you could see the pity coming from them but they were trying to make it not seem like they were pitying you. “I’ll talk to you guys later.” You uttered as you waved them off in shock, walking towards the podium celebrations where Lewis’ face was on the screen and you tried your level best to keep it in.
Eventually standing with Anthony at the entrance of the garage, there he was, walking towards the two of you. Lewis hugged his father first whilst giving him encouraging words and you see a few tears escape his eyes and that broke you. Your own tears started to fall and Lewis could hear you despite all the noise. He looked at you once and brought you to his chest for you to sob all your feelings out.
“I’m so sorry.” You cried and he just held you, your arms around his waist. “Everything will be fine, princess. I’ll be okay.” He said as he helped you calm down, rubbing your back. You lifted your head off his chest and looked up into his sad, beautiful eyes. “I love you so much. You’re a champion to me.” You tried to smile at him and he kissed your forehead.
“I love you so much more.” He said, not caring about the world seeing you console each other.
present day
Your sunglasses were perched on your nose as you leaned onto the railing of the Mercedes hospitality in Austria. The race was going terrible for the drivers who weren’t Max Verstappen. Penalties were being handed out left right and centre and it wasn’t a pleasant sight. An hour after the race, you watched how Lewis and Lando interacted in the media pen and how there was no bad blood between them.
“It always shocks me when you and Lewis still keep a positive energy around you even when it feels like the worlds against you.” You heard Susie’s voice as she walked up behind you. “As Selena Gomez said, you kill them with kindness. Us being positive makes people really mad on the internet but everything will work out soon.” You smiled to her as you took off your shades and put them in your handbag.
“And he will get his 8th World Championship title very soon, i can feel it.” You added with a wink which made Susie smile and you looked back at Lewis on the screen to see with a big smile as he bid goodbye to the interviewer.
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earthtoharlow · 11 months
Text
Flashing Lights
Jack Harlow x SingerOC
Series Masterlist
03) Fun Girl
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“I DIDN'T PEAK IN HIGH SCHOOL I'M STILL OUT HERE GETTIN CUTER!!” Maryse and Saweetie rapped along to Industry Baby by Lil Nas X and Jack while on their way to the gym.
“Nas and Jack ate that up!” Saweetie told Maryse as the song was coming to an end. Maryse immediately agreed. 
“They sure did! It’s definitely going to be huge, I can tell.” Maryse replied. Saweetie watched her long time friend take a photo of the song playing on the radio before smiling back down at her phone. 
“Hm, so things must be going great between you and Jack?” Saweetie questioned 
Maryse was so distracted by her phone that she didn’t hear her.
“BIIIITCH! I can’t believe Jack got Rubi Rose pregnant!!” Saweetie shrieked loudly. 
Maryse jumped in her seat, her phone dropping to the floor of the car. “WHAT?!” 
Saweetie couldn’t help but burst out laughing. “Oh I knew that would get your attention.”
Maryse picked up her phone with an eye roll. “That’s seriously not funny.” 
Her friend simply gave her a knowing smile before turning into the parking lot of the gym. “I was just wondering how everything’s going with lover boy, but I’m assuming it’s going great because of that silly little grin you have on your face.” 
Maryse ignored her and grabbed her gym bag and hopped out the car. “First of all, he’s not my lover boy, we’re simply just friends.”
Saweetie laughed again, “yeah ok boo whatever you say, but I’ve known you since college and you don’t even smile half as big when I text you!” She said walking ahead of Maryse
Maryse hurried behind her to catch up. “Will you slow down, geez”
“And that’s not even true!” Maryse huffed. 
“Uh huh. SURE. Then who are all those love songs you've been writing about?” Saweetie turned to question Maryse 
“You’ve been going through my songbook?!” Maryse asked before dropping her mouth in shock. 
“No, I was lying. I just wanted to see your reaction.” Saweetie soon told her. 
Maryse sighed a little. She may have a tiny crush on everyone’s favorite white rapper but she swears it’s only a little one. They’ve only hung out once more since that day at the studio, two months ago. 
“Ok, fine. I might have a tiny crush on the guy.” Maryse told her, bringing her thumb and pointer fingers together to emphasize how small of a crush she had on Jack.
“Besides, nothings gonna happen anyway. I’m nowhere near ready to start dating again.” Maryse mentioned. She dated Nate for so long, that now that they broke up, she was scared to open her heart up again. 
Saweetie gave Maryse a look of sympathy, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Are you not ready or are you just scared that Jack is going to hurt you just like Nate did?”
Maryse’s head dropped with a sigh. She hated how well Saweetie knew her. “Look, the gym isn’t the place to really talk about this, so we can talk more about it later but here’s something to think about. Don’t let your fear stop you from finding the love you truly strive for. Nate has nothing to offer you right now in the present. So don’t let him shape your future.”
To stop herself from crying in public she reached forward and gave Saweetie a big hug. “I love you, Diamonté. Thank you.”
Pulling away Maryse jokingly said. “When did you get so wise?”
“Girl, I think it’s all the Steve Harvey tik toks I’ve been watching. That man knows everything!”
The two of  them looked at each other and laughed loudly before walking towards the treadmills. 
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After Maryse and Saweetie made it back from the gym, the two girls decided to just chill around the house. Saweetie was currently in the kitchen cooking their favorite Filipino dish sinigang when Maryse decided to hop on Instagram Live to catch up with fans. 
“I’m about to hop on live so don’t say anything crazy!” Maryse yelled from the kitchen table. 
“No promises! You know I can’t control what comes out my mouth!” Her friend yells back
Maryse just shakes her head before sending off a tweet to let her followers know to join the live. 
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“Hi guys! Surprise, I’m on live! It’s been a long time huh?” Maryse said, speaking into the phone.
She leaned forward squinting a little to read the comments that were rapidly coming in. “Ooh okay, we got 6 thousand people on right now, thank y’all for joining!”
“What are you doing right now?” Maryse read the comment out loud. “Well, I landed in LA yesterday afternoon and right now I’m waiting for my personal chef to finish my dinner” She said trying to hold in her laughter, and mouthed “watch this” into the camera. Maryse could hear Saweetie drop her utensils down in the kitchen. Not even 10 seconds later, Saweetie pops down next to her and hits her slightly with her hand.
“Bitch, you wish I was your personal chef!” Maryse smiled at her before looking back at the comments. 
Saweetie pointed towards a comment on the screen. “Here’s a good one, Maryse. When are we getting new music?” 
Maryse tapped her pointer finger to her face, like she was thinking. Her new single was dropping soon but they didn’t need to know that quite yet. 
“I don’t have an answer to that, but I’ve been in the studio almost everyday trying to make sure everything is perfect. I promise, it’ll be worth the wait.” 
Maryse laughed seeing Doja comment that she and Saweetie were having too much without her. 
“Doja! We’re having a horrible time without you! We miss you so much!” Maryse replied back and blew kisses to the camera. “You know, you my bestie in a tessie!” Saweetie said to Doja. 
Maryse and Saweetie laughed and talked to the fans for a while before she saw the name Urban Wyatt request to join the live. Before she could react, Saweetie blurted out, “Who the fuck is Urban Wyatt?!”
All Maryse could do was stare at her friend in bewilderment then shake her head. She accepted his request and a couple seconds later he showed up. 
“I’m sorry about her, she’s from our straight outta the hood program, and lacks some home training.” Maryse said jokingly. 
“But how are you doing?” 
Maryse wanted to ask him where his best friend was, but contained herself.
Urban laughed at her joke before responding. “I’m alright, you know just in the studio with my boy.”
Behind Urban you could hear a voice questioning who he was speaking to. The sound of Jack’s voice was making Maryse’s stomach tingle, it seemed to get worse when he finally appeared in front of the camera. 
Maryse couldn’t help but give him a shy smile, but it turned into a full blown smile when Jack smiled back. 
“Hello, ladies.” Jack greeted them, taking a seat next to Urban 
“Cracker Jack!” Saweetie said with a wave before going back to eating her food. 
“Hi, Jackman, I heard you guys are in the studio.” Maryse already knew this, the two of them were texting all morning, and planned on hanging out the next day since they were both in town.
Jack nodded, taking over the phone from Urban. “Been here all day.”
Jack got closer to the camera “what’s the move for tonight? Y’all look good.” Jack said with a flirty smile. He wasn’t lying, they both looked good. But he was only looking at Maryse. 
“Boy bye!” Saweetie said with a wave of her hand while Maryse couldn’t stop the smile on her smile. 
Deciding to ignore him, Maryse answered his first question. 
“We’re probably just going to bar—“ Maryse was cut off 
“Fuck a bar! We going to the club! We OUTSIDE!”
Giving a funny look into the camera, “my apologies, I guess we’re hitting up the club” Maryse shrugged. She really didn’t feel like going out but also felt like she needed a night out after spending so many nights in the studio. 
Since Jack was in the studio, Maryse could hear what sounded like horns in the background. She couldn’t help but bring it up.
“Let the people hear what you’re working on! From what I can hear it sounds good.” Maryse told him. 
“Yeah! Let us hear, Cracker Jack!”
“Will you ever stop calling me that?”
“No.”
Jack shocked his head at her before talking the phone over to the soundboards. 
“Alright, I’ll play the first 20 seconds. Mainly because that’s all I have and I can’t give away too much.” Jack said before giving a wink into the camera. 
If Maryse was lying down, that wink would’ve had her giggling and kicking her feet.
The ladies watched as Jack pressed play and the sounds of horns sounded from behind him. It sounded amazing. After a few seconds you could hear Jack come in
Mm-mm, mm, mm-mm tss
My nail tech knows how to keep a lil' secret
I don't wish for my success, I speak it….
Maryse and Saweetie started bobbing their heads and dancing in their seats. The comments were going crazy at the snippet. Maryse cheered a little as the snippet ended. 
“Jack, you gotta finish that ASAP! I’m loving the horns” Maryse told him, Saweetie nodded her head in agreement.
Maryse thought it was sweet watching Jack put his head down shyly to hide him blushing. 
“Thanks, ma” He told her.
It was Maryse’s turn to blush.
Jack and Urban had to get off soon after to finish working in the studio but not before dropping the news that the two of you worked on a song together and quickly leaving the live leaving the fans to freak out
“He’s lying. What I tell you guys about believing white men!”
LIFEOFMONET
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liked by saweetie, chloebailey, wolftyla, michaelbjordan, urbanwyatt, latto777, jackharlow and 756,935 others
lifeofmonet: I see why my ex didn’t want me outside, they love me out here 🤪
view all 5,266 comments
user: ah yesss
dojacat: don’t have too much fun without me!
user: literally so obsessed with you 😍
user: Nate really an idiot for letting you go!
user: need new music now
jackharlow: have fun, ladies!
user: I love single Maryse!!
user: CITY GIRLS UP FR
Maryse and Saweetie walked down the sidewalk with their arms hooked together. They weren’t in the least bit drunk, but laughter has been going on all night. The two spent a total of 30 minutes at the club before deciding to just go to a bar with good music instead.
“What are we having?” Saweetie asks Maryse as they walk to the bar. Sitting down waiting for the waiter to approach them.
“Hm, let’s be lemon drop bops tonight” Maryse told her with a grin.
“Yes hunny! I love the sound of that”
3 lemon drops later Maryse was starting to feel buzzed. She’s always been a lightweight.
Leaning over to talk in her friends ear she said “I’m going to the restroom, I’ll be right back!”
Saweetie nodded before asking if Maryse needed her to come with. Shaking her head no Maryse replied “Stay here! We don’t wanna lose our table!”
Maryse made her way to the restroom in one piece. Thankfully, there was hardly a long wait.
After washing her hands and convincing herself that she wasn’t that drunk, Maryse left the bathroom. As she was turning the corner she ran into what felt like a brick wall.
“Oh God, I’m so sorry—“ Maryse stopped herself once she saw who it was.
It was Nate.
Rolling her eyes, she moved to walk around him but he stopped her.
“I have nothing to say to you, move out of my way.” Maryse gritted her teeth at him.
“Oh c’mon babe, don’t treat me like that.” Nate said, stepping closer to her. Maryse’s back hit the hallway wall.
“I saw your little instagram post.” Nate mentioned
Maryse couldn’t help but roll her eyes again at him. “Really? That’s why you have me cornered right now.” Nate was really starting to piss her off. The alcohol making it worse.
“Let’s get back together.” Nate begged her.
The audacity of this man. “HELL NO! I don’t know if it’s because you’re constantly hitting your head while playing football or what but I’m never getting back together with you. Now, I suggest you leave before Diamonté sees you and kicks your ass.” Maryse told him before pushing past him and walking away
“That’s fine! I don’t want your hoe ass anyway! No one does.” Nate spat out, nose flaring.
Maryse almost turned back around to give him another piece of her mind, but what he said next made her stop in her tracks.
“I’m glad you said no when I proposed to you. You know what they say, you can’t turn a ho into a housewife. You're always going to be the fun girl, the homie. It’s cool to hang out with you until it’s time to settle down. Never going to be wifey material with that nasty attitude.”
Maryse counted to 10 in her head to calm herself down. How dare he. She continued to walk away, not even wanting to give him the pleasure of knowing he hurt her. Making her way back to the table by the bar she ignored Saweetie when she asked why it took her so long and ordered a round of vodka shots. Maryse had a point to prove now. She’ll show him a fun girl.
Few hours later, the crowd in the bar was starting to thin. This particular bar was open 24 hours but it was almost 3 am so people were starting to leave. Maryse and Saweetie were giggling like teenagers. They’ve lost count how many drinks they each had tonight.
“You're really lucky I wasn’t around when he cornered you, that’s all I’m saying!” Saweetie told her
“What were you gonna do? Kick his ass?” Maryse questioned.
“Yes I would’ve went WWE on his ass!” Maryse could not stop laughing at that. All she could visualize was Saweetie suplexing a football player double her size.
“I think we should call it a night.” Maryse said after they stopped laughing with a slur of her words. She was dreading the hangover she was bound to have in the morning.
Saweetie nods in agreement, “yup, I’m done. But you gotta call Uber. My phone died.” She slips off the stool and staggers towards Maryse. “Oh, I love this song! Let’s dance, while we wait! Saweetie screeches as she pulls Maryse towards the dance floor to dance to Sticky by Drake
“There’s hardly anyone dancing anymore!” Maryse complained.
“Who cares?” She argues before pulling Maryse towards her.
“Oh fuck!” Saweetie ends up tripping over her feet, falling and managing to drag Maryse down with her with a yelp. “Sorry!” She laughs.
Maryse would be embarrassed right now if she wasn’t drunk off her ass. She couldn’t imagine what the two of them looked like laying on the bar floor a giggling mess. As much fun she’s having, Maryse is starting to remember why she doesn’t go out with Saweetie.
“URBAN, JACK WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” Saweetie yells out
Hearing Jack’s name almost sobered Maryse up completely.
Looking up, Urban looked like he was trying to contain his laughter while Jack had a worried expression on his face as they loomed over top of them.
“You texted me to come pick you up from here.” Jack said, helping you to your feet. Urban doing the same with Saweetie.
“Oh.” Jack stumbles back in surprise as Maryse throws her arm around him in a drunken hug. “I’m so happy you’re here!”
“Damn, they’re plastered.” Urban said, trying his hardest to hold Saweetie up right.
Jack just nods before telling him to make sure Saweetie got home safely. He was going to take Maryse back to his place.
“You think you can walk to my truck?” Jack asked Maryse.
“Of course I’m not that drunk.” She was.
Jack guides her out of the bar. Maryse was ashamed to admit it but if Jack’s arm wasn’t wrapped around her waist to hold her up, she would be eating concrete right now.
As they walk out the exit door, Jack decides to carry Maryse to his car, since he parked around the back to avoid the possibility of paparazzi.
“You aren’t going to throw up on me, are you?” Jack jokes
“No” Maryse scuffs
“Hm, are you sure?” Jack laughs, the vibrations from his chest pass through her.
“I’m fine, I promise.” Maryse said as she relaxed into his arms.
Jack places her down for just a few seconds so he could unlock and open the car door.
“Ok, just warn me before you throw up, these are my favorite pair of New Balance. I’m putting you in the car now.”
Maryse insisted again that she wasn’t going to throw up. Jack still didn’t believe her. He lowered her into the car and leaned over her to buckle the seat belt. His LV cologne invaded her nostrils. As Jack pulls back all Maryse could do was give him a big cheesy smile. She reaches her hand forward to try to reach out to him.
“Woah, there’s two of you!”
Jack couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Maryse, you’re adorable, you know that?”
“Yeah, that’s what people say.” She said tiredly before closing her eyes and leaning her head back against the seat.
Jack drives them back to his apartment, not wanting to leave her alone in this state. The ride back was quiet before he heard Maryse speak in almost a whisper.
“Jack?”
“Yes, Maryse?”
“I’m really starting to like you.”
There’s a sharp intake of breath from Jack. He hated that she probably wouldn’t remember this.
“Don’t hurt me, ok?”
“I could never, Maryse. I could never.”
Jack was left alone in his thoughts for the rest of the ride home.
——————————————————————————
AN: Another long chapter full IG lives, lemon drops, ex boyfriends and drunken confessions! Hope you all enjoyed this, let me know what you think!
Also I’m super proud of that gif, it almost looks real! Haha
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havecourage-darling · 2 years
Text
You’re slipping through my fingertips
The one where Eddie breaks his arm crowd surfing at his concert and the doctor at the ER is his ex-girlfriend he left behind when he got the hell out of Hawkins.
pairing: Rockstar AU! Eddie Munson x ER Doctor Adopted! Hopper Female Reader
wc: 9.5K
warnings/tags: cursing, lovers to exes to strangers to lovers?, post-break up, make up, everything pre/in s4 happened but eddie munson lives because I said so.
A/N: I don’t know why I’ve clung to adopted hopper reader but here we are. I have very little knowledge of how medical field works (my ten thousand nurse/doctor friends would be endlessly disappointed in me!) and bent it a little to fit the plot. Sorry!
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Masterlist || AO3
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When you were fourteen, you met Eddie Munson.
You were the new kid, first day of high school, and the cherry on top? The new deputy’s kid. Your dad had gotten a job offer in his hometown, Hawkins, and your mom hadn’t wanted to leave New York. After Sara…they fought all the time and when you’d chosen to go with your dad in the divorce, your mom had taken it as a betrayal. You’d begged him to choose anywhere else but he was adamant you’d love it. So here you were, a small, nosey, town in the middle of nowhere.
To your utter mortification, despite your student tour guide’s – Nancy Wheeler – multiple instructions, you couldn’t open your locker.
Anxious, pressure building behind your eyes, you tried for the tenth time. Suddenly, the locker next to yours slammed open and you jumped. A boy with bright wide eyes, a shaved head, and a nice smile blinded you. He’d taken the lock gently from your hands and with a kick to the door, it opened.
“The hinges stick. Jack, the guy who had it before you, always kicked it open.”
“Thanks,” you stammered.
“Yeah, anytime.” He shot you his own shy smile before disappearing around the corner.
And that had been all it took really. You had almost all your classes together that year and he got a kick out of your stories of New York. Eddie was constantly in motion -- hands flying, feet shuffling, head nodding – it was enticing.
After being assigned partners for some English project you couldn’t remember anymore, a few days before thanksgiving, he’d asked you out on a date.
You’d said yes.
And that was the beginning of everything.
Then – a few years later – Will Byers went missing. You got a little sister. Your father died. Eddie was accused of murder. You beat Vecna. Eddie almost died. Your father was alive. The town was too. You’d helped save the world. 
And that was the end of everything.
When you were twenty, Eddie Munson left Hawkins - and you - behind.
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“How many fucking times have I told you not to do that?” Claire hissed, her cellphone cradled between her shoulder and her ear. She’d been on hold for a few minutes, making sure everything – as always – was being fixed.
“A thousand times,” Eddie sighed, grunting when the EMTs tightened the sling around his neck. To be fair, Eddie hadn’t crowd surfed in a long time. It was something about being back in Indiana – to where it had all started – that made his skin itch. Hey, he never said he wasn’t reckless.
“This should hold it. We don’t know how bad the break is until you’ve gotten some x-rays so please refrain from moving it as much as you can. How’s the pain level?”
Eddie had experienced worse. A flash of demonic bats clawing at him and your shaking hands covered in his blood danced across his memory before he shoved it to the back of his mind. “It’s not too bad.”
“Is there a chance we can unload in the med bay?” Claire asked, finally putting down her cell phone. “We left the guards back at the arena and they won’t be here for a few minutes due to traffic.”
The EMTs assured his nervous manager that they’d be able to get him into the ER with discretion. “Thanks guys,” Eddie said, remembering the covert look of awe in the driver’s eyes. Corroded Coffin had only recently started selling out arenas and stadiums but Eddie knew what a fan looked like. “If you want me to sign anything, I can do it. My writing hand is still good.” He wiggled his right hand.
“For fuck’s sake Munson,” Claire muttered, her brick of a phone creaking in her grip. She watched as the technician sheepishly handed him three random scraps of paper to sign.
Eddie waited as the doors to the ambulance opened and he was wheeled into a chaotic emergency room. An older nurse walked up to him with a smile and a clip board. “Hello, I’m Nurse Johnson and I’ll be taking you over to one of our private rooms down the hall.”
Claire scrambled to introduce herself and Eddie, mentioning his bandmates who were likely to be by soon.
“Unfortunately, we’ve had a pretty big accident a few hours ago so we’re a little slow tonight. Our senior resident will be by to assess the situation shortly. Here’s the paperwork we’ll need and please rest assured Mr. Munson, we know how to be discreet. The journalists outside are not allowed anywhere inside,” she said, tone firm like she’d beat them herself if she had to.
“Thank you,” Eddie said, shooting the nurse a smile. She patted his good hand and finished setting him up in his bed.
“I can’t believe you’re this much of an idiot,” Claire said, settling in the comfy looking chair next to his bed. Her brows furrowed as she started filling out his paperwork. Eddie tried not to smile; Claire had been there with him since the beginning – the only manager willing to represent Corroded Coffin. “I had a date after the concert you know, life isn’t only centered around you.”  
He clutched his chest, groaning when it pulled on his bad arm. “You’re telling me, that this tiny chunk of rock in this universe, does not revolve around the lead singer?”
“I hate you,” she said dryly. “She was really cute too.”
“Yeah?” Eddie quirked a brow. Claire always had dates – he wasn’t worried for her. “What’s her name?”
“Rain.”
He snorted, seriously? “Sounds like a dud.”
“You always say that!”
“And am I usually wrong?” He asked.
“Yes!”
“What about Brittany? Or Jacob?”
Claire glared at him and Eddie grinned, knowing he had her. “We promised never to say their names out loud again!” Her chair screeched painfully as she stood, clip board clutched to her chest and eyes narrowed in his direction. “I’m taking this to the nurse, you shithead, don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”
Eddie laughed as she walked out and shook his head. His arm really didn’t hurt much but he knew it was broken. Sighing, he knew he wouldn’t be able to play with it but he’d probably be fine to sing. What was their next city? Dallas? Chicago? They still had a few more national dates before their break. After those two weeks they were on to London.
Who did they have on standby for guitar? Jimmy? Fiona? Maybe Helene if she wasn’t busy…
“Claire?” Eddie called out. If they wanted to get Helene before she was booked for the year, they’d have to call soon.
The door opened and Eddie suddenly wasn’t sure he hadn’t actually hit head. His chest tightened, his lungs seemed like they didn’t want to work, and he was almost positive the ground shook beneath him.
“Hello sir, I apologize we’re a little short staffed at the moment. I’m Dr. Hopper, I’ll be taking care of you this evening. Let me just grab your chart Mr…” your voice trailed off, and Eddie watched as your hands tightened on the clip board in your hands. Then finally, finally, after almost ten years – your eyes darted back up to his.
“Eddie?”
Jesus Christ did he forget how he loved the way you said his name. “Hey Cap’,” he said, flashes of you in your soccer uniform bubbling to the surface. He’d once lost his voice during the championship junior year – it’d been your first year as captain and he knew how much you’d wanted to win. The image of you hoisting up the trophy in your arms, smile beaming and blowing him a kiss, was not one he’d be likely to forget.
You’d clearly grown up in the last decade. Your uniform in school had been something similar to his, jeans, band t-shirt, and chucks. Seeing you with your hair pinned back, a white coat, and scrubs underneath was…different. A pair of glasses were balanced on the top of your head and he itched to see what you looked like with them on. While the surface of you had changed, the shocked expression on your face sent a pang through his chest – you’d always been easy to read. At least to him. Clearly, not anymore.
“What the fuck?” You said, breaking the spell he’d been under. With a wince he tried to straighten up on the bed but hissed when pain shot through his arm.
He glanced back up at you and he watched a wall fall into place. Your face smoothed, your eyes blank, and you shook your head. “I – uh, I’m so sorry Mr. Munson. That was entirely inappropriate. I was…surprised.”
Mr. Munson? That was Wayne – or shit, his dad – he’d never been called Mr. Munson in his life. Not unless you counted teachers screaming after him.
“Please don’t ever call me that again, I think that hurt more than the arm,” Eddie said, fighting everything within him not to beam when your brow twitched. A little bit of amusement bled into your eyes before they darted down to his chart.
“Do you want me to see if another doctor can treat you?”
“What?” Eddie sputtered. He knew you hadn’t stayed friends but did you hate him that much? “No,” he said, stubbornly.
“Eddie, we dated for six years.”
And goddamn if those hadn’t been the best six years of his life.
“So? Doesn’t the code of ethics or whatever only extend to immediate family members?” He frowned. “If you’re here, I know you’re the best one of the bunch. So, I want you.”
Eddie ignored how the words sounded, the small hollow spot in his chest expanding in your sudden presence.
He watched you swallow visibly, your fingers clenching. “I see it says here you’re in for a fracture? We won’t know the extent of the damage or injury until we’ve gotten x-rays.” At his blank look you sighed. “If it needs surgery, I won’t be the one to do it anyway. You’ll be referred to a specialist I assume, considering the importance of the use of a musician’s arm.”
Wait, surgery? Holy shit, he hadn’t even thought of that.
“Hey, hey, we don’t know how bad it is. It could be a small fracture, a clean break, nothing indicates surgery yet,” you said, hand reaching for him like you were going to touch his good arm but remembered and avoided it at the last minute.
“That’s okay,” he said, eyes on yours. He didn’t know what he was saying at this point. You could suggest that he take of his clothes and run naked in front of the paparazzi outside and he’d do it.  
In fact, it took every ounce of energy he had not to reach out and grab your hand. He’d thought about seeing you so many times over the years, he never thought it’d be in an emergency room. Eddie had been back to Hawkins – of course he had – but you’d never been around. Dustin and Eleven told him you were at school most of the time. Eddie wondered if your smile was the same. Suddenly, a thought bubbled up to the surface, shit – he’d do anything to hear your laugh again.
Instead, you were staring at him like he was something you’d found in the forest. Something interesting to look at but not worthy of too much attention.
“Alright, uh – I’ll put in an order for the necessary scans and I’ll be by to go over the results. If you need any pain management or anything, please let Nurse Johnson know.”
This was wild. You were in his room talking about scans and x-rays when you’d saved the world together. He’d lost his virginity to you. You’d been this entire world and…he was supposed to be able to concentrate on anything else?
“Yeah, alright, thanks,” Eddie breathed, eyes still taking you in. He was working up the courage to ask you to stay, it felt like if you left his eyesight, he’d never see you again. A loud bang startled you both, popping the bubble, and he watched Gareth storm into the room.
“Dude, you’re fucking insane! Claire and Warren are going to hang you by the ba-” his voice got struck in his throat, choking, as he did a double take. “Hopper?”
The tightness in your face smoothed out and your eyes lit up when they turned to Gareth. “Oh my God you haven’t changed a bit!” You accepted his hug. Why the fuck did Gareth get a hug and a smile and he got tense silence?
Because he’d broken your heart. And you’d broken his. His mind reminded him painfully.
“We need to catch up, dude, I can’t believe you’re here. It’s like, kismet!” Gareth said, giving you another hug. You beamed up at him and Eddie bit down on his cheek so hard, he tasted blood. What the fuck? Since when did he ever get jealous of Gareth? “Is this where you ended up doing your residency?”
Wait, what? Gareth knew you’d gone into medicine? Your eyes darted to Eddie’s before skirting away. “Uh, no I did most of my residency in New York. I’m a traveling doctor for now, as a senior resident, I’m only in Indianapolis for a month before I’m going back to Hawkins’ Hospital for a bit. I still haven’t made a decision what offer to take.”
“That’s so cool, I’m happy for you,” Gareth said, giving you another hug. You smiled at him – again! – and tapped your clipboard.
“I’m going to get these orders processed and someone will be by soon to come get you, okay?”
Eddie nodded dumbly, watching you as you all but ran from the room. Gareth turned his head towards Eddie, shit-eating smile widening, and crossed his arms.
Claire walked in, midway through hanging up her phone, and sighed when she saw Gareth. “I don’t even want to know how you got passed security.” She turned to Eddie. “Everything is under control. John is doing damage control at the venue and we’ve got additional security set up to keep the reporters under control. Warren’s outside in the waiting room waiting to slap you for doing something so stupid. I’ve apologized to most of the staff for the disturbance and ordered a bunch of food so they don’t hold it against us.”
“Thanks, C,” Eddie mumbled.
Shooting him a weird look, she turned to Gareth who sighed. “What the hell is wrong with him?”
“Did you, uh, see his doctor?”
Claire nodded. “I introduced myself to her on her way out.”
Eddie glowered. “That’s my ex.”
“So? We run into your exes all the time,” Claire joked, not entirely a lie.
“That’s Hopper,” Gareth said quietly, knowing you were different.
Claire’s eyebrows disappeared into her bangs. “That’s Hopper? The Hopper? Shit, Munson, you let that go?” Claire shook her head, eyes darting to the door like she could see you through it. “Even I was checking her out. Did you see her hips?”
“You check anything out with a pulse,” Eddie snapped, pathetically glancing at the door for a glimpse of you.
She pointed one long nail at him. “Hypocrite.”
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“Alright, so I’ve got your scans back Eddie…” you walked into the room and your voice immediately trailed off at the sight of three sets of eyes on you. “Oh, I’m sorry Mr. Munson,” you stammered, “I didn’t know you were with visitors.”
Something in Eddie’s chest wanted to crack in two at the sound of your voice calling him Mr. Munson again. Like you hadn’t spent a whole life together. Like at one point you hadn’t been the woman he thought he’d spend the rest of his life with.
“Did she just call you Mr. Munson?” Warren asked, eyebrows quirking in a way that Eddie knew meant he wanted to laugh.
Your face immediately looked flustered and uncomfortable. Eddie jumped to defend you, not wanting to alienate you. “Ignore him, he’s a jackass. He’s the eldest of seven, it’s in his DNA to take the piss out of people.”
Warren chuckled, nodding and extending a hand out to you. “I’m Warren Hudson. Mr. Munson’s head of security.”
“Ah,” you nodded, clutching the folder in your hands tightly to your body. Eddie’s stomach flipped uncomfortably and he turned to glare at Warren when he realized Warren was checking you out.
Discretely, Eddie reached out to pinch his inner forearm and Warren jumped. “Alright, alright, message received.”
Claire, never one to not seize an opportunity to introduce herself, walked straight up to you. “Hi, I’m Claire – Corroded Coffin’s manager. I’ve heard a lot about you, it’s nice to finally meet the Hopper.”
Jesus Christ. Did no one on his team have any sense of decorum? Warren had just spent the last hour in his room refusing to leave because he wanted to meet the girl that ‘had Munson on his knees.’ Claire just flat out told him she wasn’t leaving until they’d finally met.
“For fuck’s sake Claire,” Eddie grumbled.
You, however, seemed to realize his team was fucking with him and smiled widely. “All good things, I hope? I’m Dr. Hopper. Nice to meet you both.”
“Of course! You can’t know Eddie for as long as I do without knowing about you!”
“Really?” Your eyes slid to his and he wanted to sink into the floor.
Before Eddie could get a word in, Claire lit up like a Christmas tree and Eddie groaned. Warren laughed, like the asshole he was, and shook his head. “You’re going to have enough with Claire on your case. I’ll be in the waiting room down the hall if you need me,” Warren said, leaning in to – mercifully – lower his voice. “I see why you’re so hung up on her now.”
“Get out,” Eddie hissed, narrowing his eyes at him.
Warren just laughed, head thrown back and fist bumping you on the way out.
After what felt like an eternity, Claire finished her verbal assault and turned back to him. “I like her Munson, why’d you keep her away for so long?”
You choked, coughing not covering up your amused laughter.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I’m being unprofessional on all accounts tonight,” you said, shaking your head and holding up an x-ray to the light. “The break is clean - it doesn’t even need to be set. I believe the EMTs in the ambulance said you’d managed to knock back into place? How you managed that I don’t even know…”
Claire turned to glare at him. “Because he thought crowd surfing despite the hundreds of times that I have told all of them not to do it would be good. I hope this teaches you a goddamn lesson Munson.”
“Probably not,” you muttered, gathering up the necessary supplies towards Eddie’s bed.
At Claire’s snort and Eddie’s indignant huff, he watched your head snap up. “Oh my God, I said that out loud.”
“Please, tell me how you really feel,” Eddie said, not able to help from goading you.
Your eye widened and hands came up in defense. “I swear, it was like a knee jerk reflex. Like that time you thought diving off your roof was a good idea – I’m pretty sure the only reason you and Jeff didn’t break your ankles was because-”
“- we fell on the garbage Paula had left out the night before,” Eddie finished, remembering. He grinned at the memory. The band had finally had a bigger than normal crowd and they’d gotten stupidly drunk. You’d been the designated driver for that weekend and had complained endlessly how you’d never do it again if they didn’t stop doing stupid shit. Somehow that had ended up with a discussion about the dumbest things they could all do – which is how they’d ended up on the roof.
You’d yelled at them for hours after, freaking out the entire night. To be fair, you’d been right – you usually were. But after you’d tired yourself out – and he’d spent hours apologizing – he’d managed to get you to admit it had been pretty cool.
It was stupid, but the way you’d grinned that morning, admitting that their impromptu concert on the roof of his trailer was amazing – was seared into his memory. Especially considering you’d kept him in bed the entire weekend.
Eddie resurfaced from his memory of you in his old room, bra strap falling from your shoulder and your head thrown back in laughter, as your gloved hand came to undo his sling.
“Sorry, what?”
Claire rolled her eyes so hard he shot her a look. You, on the other hand, just smiled patiently. God, he’d forgotten how easy it was with you.
“I’m going to feel a little just to make sure everything is okay, then I’ll start wrapping. Once we get through that, considering the nature of your job, I’ll have the nurse explain your physical therapy schedule for post-removal. This is your non-dominant hand, right? That’s good.”
“Yeah,” he said, shifting and wincing when the pain shot up his arm. You leaned in close, trying not to move his arm much and your fingers examined the swelling. Claire, hovering behind your shoulder, shot him a look he didn’t understand before pointing to the door.
“I’ll go…talk to the nurse from earlier about the therapy schedule,” she said, completely unconvincingly. Without preamble, she disappeared out the door.
You hadn’t moved, your eyes clinical and mouth set in concentration. “She’s subtle.”
Eddie wanted the ground to swallow him. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” you said, sitting back onto a small stool and finally smiling. “I like your manager, I’m glad you have someone to keep you grounded.”
The pain was starting to ricochet up and he felt himself start to sweat. He knew it wasn’t incredibly cool but he had a notoriously low pain threshold. He was pretty sure that’s the only reason why they’d given him some pain meds. Even Claire had mentioned how she’d torn her ACL in college and hadn’t been that big of a whiner.
“Hey,” you said, touching his good hand. “Tell me about the concert tonight. Are you guys on tour? What’s your set list?”
Eddie knew what you were doing, eyes darting towards the tools on the platter to your right. Still, he took the bone you’d thrown him. “Do you…listen to any of our music?”
You shot him a deadpan look and he smiled. “Of course, I do Eddie, you’ve always been an amazing musician.” He didn’t know why but the resolution in your voice and the confirmation that you hadn’t avoided anything to do with him like the plague after he’d left – it…made him happy.
So, he told you about the tour they were on – the stops they had next and how they were going over to the UK, Spain, and a few other countries before ending it in New York City.
“I heard,” you said, shaking your head in awe, “Madison Square Garden, Munson.”
“I know,” he said. It’d be their first time – and the sales were so close to being sold out it felt like the entire band were holding their breaths for the news. Claire kept assuring them they’d be sold out by the end of the week. “If only the people of Hawkins could see me now, huh?”
Your eyes came up to his and he was surprised by the emotion in them. “They never saw you, Eddie. They didn’t deserve to anyway. I knew you’d make it here eventually and I honestly can’t say I know anyone more deserving.”
To Eddie’s horror, he felt undeniable pressure behind his eyes. Shit. Why had that hit him so hard? You know why, his mind supplied. Your support had been present, unwavering, and constant for so long that when you’d broken up, its absence had left a hole in his chest that nothing could fix.
“Thanks,” he said, voice thick.
“I know this may not mean much but,” you grabbed his other hand and squeezed tightly. “I am so proud of you, Eddie.”
If only you knew.
“It means a lot, it always does with you,” he admitted, eyes anywhere but on you.
“Yeah?” Your eyes were on packing up your supplies. His gaze fluttered over to his arm, realizing you were done. Damn. You were good. Wait, wait, were you leaving?
Say something, his mind shouted. “Will you sit with me for a bit? Just until I get used to the feeling?” He lifted his now heavy arm.
Your brow raised and you glanced down at a small black thing on your coat. “I don’t know…”
“Come on, we can play a game.”
“A game?”
Eddie’s mind scrambled for something, anything. “Yeah, twenty questions – to help break the ice.”
You sat down in the chair closest to his bed and smiled. “Ten questions, I do have a job Eddie, and we don’t have ice to break.”
“Deal. I go first!”
Nose wrinkling endearingly, you crossed your arms. “Why do you get to go first?”
“Because it was my idea!”
“Fine,” you sighed, rolling your eyes. The lightness in your expression letting him know you were teasing.
Not wanting to ask something he already knew the answer to – Eddie decided to jump for the second time that night. “So, who was the poor sucker that came after me?” He asked.
Your eyes darted up to his, surprised, and a small, familiar, ember of mischief in them. His heart flipped, the poor bastard. “Of all the questions you could’ve asked, that’s what you’re using to break the ice?”
“So there is ice to break?” He said, grinning.
Not one to back down, you shook your head at him with a determined expression so familiar it sent a pang through his chest. Eddie stomped on the urge to reach out and kiss you senseless.
Your teasing expression morphed into something he couldn’t name. Something that looked a little like regret. “The first serious one? His name was Brad.”
“Brad?” Eddie forced a smile, not prepared for the surge of jealousy that shot through him. “He sounds like a tool.”
Smacking his leg, Eddie pretended like your touch didn’t brand him. “He wasn’t. Brad was…Brad is a good guy. I met him my first day of med school.”
“A doctor? Fancy.” Definitely a tool.
You grinned, like you could tell what he was thinking, and picked at the skin around your nails. “Yeah, he went into pediatric oncology.”
Well shit, he was saving sick kids. “He sounds like a ray of sunshine.”
Laughing, you shook your head at him, eyes fond. “He was, he wants to change the world. Helping kids and underprivileged people. It’s been his dream since he was a little kid.”
“Sounds boring,” he joked, squeezing your hand to assure you he was kidding. “Where is this amazing Brad? Was he an idiot like me and let you go?”
“No,” you said, almost ruefully. He watched your mouth twist to the side before sighing. “We were engaged. For a few years.”
Eddie’s heart dropped to his feet. You were engaged? His eyes darted to your hand and he realized your ring finger was bare.
“I’m not married,” you snorted when he, likely, turned bright red at his lack of subtlety. Not married doesn’t mean single, his brain supplied helpfully. Not that that mattered. Doesn’t it? Jesus, didn’t his mind ever shut the hell up? No.
“Is it too rude to ask what happened?”
You shrugged, fingers going to your ring finger. “I was tired of trying to keep up with all his ambition. We had different dreams and I didn’t want to hold him back.” A flash of determination darted across your face. “He said he was tired of always feeling second best. I believe his words were, I can’t compete with a ghost.”
“Second best?” Eddie frowned.
Wide, pointed, eyes shot to his and he realized. Another pang hit his chest and Eddie was sure that if he hadn’t been lying down, he would’ve dropped to the floor.
“What about you?” You asked, like you hadn’t just knocked the air out of him with your admission. You cleared your throat and wrung your hands together. You were uncomfortable, he noted, realizing he still knew pieces of the new you.
“What about me?” He parroted, brain still coming back online.
Eddie caught your eye roll and fought his smile. Shit, how could it have been so many years and after a few minutes it felt like no time had passed? What fucking magic did you possess?
“Hey,” you said, nudging your foot with his, “I told you about me.”
Embarrassment flashed through him. “As sad as it sounds, uh, there hasn’t really been anyone after you,” he said, eyes darting away from your face.
Surprising him, he heard you snort. “Yeah, okay, the lead singer and guitarist of Corroded Coffin never had a girlfriend after his high school sweetheart.”
“Well, no, I’ve had shorter relationships and uh…well, um,” he stammered, remembering flashes of drunken stumbling into hotel rooms across the country.
“Bed warmers?” You suggested with a sparkle in your eye.
This time, he rolled his eyes and nodded. “Yeah,” he huffed, “but no one really serious. Not really.”
“Why not?”
Because he couldn’t give his heart over to someone when the memory of you felt like something he was continuously chasing. Because it wasn’t fair to anyone else. Because no one ever measured up to you. Because…that’s just the way he worked.
Your eyes caught his and the air became charged around you both. Eddie tried to think of an answer to your question but only one crossed his mind.
“Why didn’t you come with me?” He blurted.
“What?” You blinked, surprised. Eddie swallowed around the lump in his throat.
“The week before we’d decided to leave…and I told you – I asked you if you’d come with me. You looked at me in a way I’ll never forget, ever.”
The silence in the room felt like it was suffocating. The clock on the wall was loud and echoed in his head, bouncing around as he waited for you to say something. Anything.
“In my head it’d always kinda felt like you left me behind,” you said with a small, devastatingly sad smile. “It felt like you needed to grow and I wasn’t ready yet.”
Left you behind? “I asked you to come with me – I didn’t…I never wanted you to feel like I was leaving you behind,” he said, realizing.
“I know. It still stung though,” you admitted with a small shrug. He could tell you were trying to find the right words, taking your time to put them together before speaking.
“You didn’t ask me to stay,” he said, remembering how it felt. Standing in front of his half-destroyed trailer and your hiccupping tears echoing in the air. He’d been waiting for you to ask – because he would’ve stayed. He would’ve done anything for you.  
You blinked, eyes coming up to his again. “How could I have? In Hawkins? After everything that town had done to you? I knew you’d stay if I asked and you were always too good for that town.”
That was fair. “Why’d you stay?”
“You know why,” you said without hesitation. Your eyes went to the closed door and sighed. “The same reason why I didn’t go when you asked. Eleven had gotten her powers back – we didn’t know if Max was going to live. My sister needed me. My dad was alive – Eddie, it was a lot. We’d been through a lot. I never blamed you for leaving, it was the right choice. Clearly.”
He had figured that was why but he’d always still wanted to ask one day. “We had something good though, right?”
“Eddie,” your face softened into a version of you that he recognized. “What we had, that shit was once in a lifetime. It didn’t matter that we were kids for half of it. Six years is a long time. We…we were good together.”
“Yeah?”
You smiled at him, reaching into his chest and pulling his heart right out of it. “Yeah. Somehow, that seemed to hurt more.” It was like Eddie had poked at a wound he thought had healed and was surprised to find it bleeding.
Eddie let himself fall down the rabbit hole for a second and he really thought about the years that had passed. He’d had something special and he threw it away, for what? To run away? Again? He wanted to chase his dreams, yeah. But a big part of it was running from Hawkins.
“I can hear you thinking from here,” you teased, bringing his spiral to a pause. “Don’t…don’t overthink it. I spent the first two years after you left overthinking ever tiny piece of what we’d said. Should I have gone with you? Would we be married by now if I had? Kids? Would we have even made it? Would I have become a doctor? The what if, that’ll kill you. Or, it almost killed me.”
You’d opened up a drawer in his mind and dusted off the cobwebs off the questions he’d tortured himself with for almost half a decade. Gareth and Jeff had suffered through a long, long time of finding him drunk in a hotel room wondering what it would’ve been like if you’d come. The fact that you’d also thought about it, hurt twice as deep. It also pulled a painful truth from underneath multiple layers of delusion. He’d really never fallen out of love with you. Eddie had always been a stubborn idiot. It seemed his heart, back in your palms, had never really had any intention on giving you up.
He blinked, dumbstruck, and was only pulled out of his tornado of misery when he felt your warm hand on his hand. “Hey, you okay?”
“Yeah,” he croaked, unbelievable even to himself.
You smiled softly, like you knew the truth. “We were the right people but wrong time. Timing is everything.” And you were right. You’d had the timing before demons and other dimensions stole it from him.
Eddie nodded like that simple fact didn’t crack his heart further.
Clearly trying to change the subject, you cleared your throat. “I told myself if I ever saw you again, I’d never be stupid enough to ask - but…”
Grasping at the second bone you threw that night, he nodded. “You can ask me anything,” Eddie said, his tone a breath too honest even to his own ears.
The smile that bloomed on your face made his stomach flip. Mouth twisting, eyes mischievous, you ducked your head. “Is the song about me?”
Wanting to keep the smile on your face, Eddie pretended like he didn’t know what you were talking about. “What song?”
The look in your eyes told him you knew what he was doing. “You’re going to make me sing it?”
“If you want an answer,” he said, shrugging innocently.
You narrowed your eyes at him and glanced around before nodding. “You never know how good you have it, until you're staring at a picture of the only girl that matters. I know what we're supposed to do. It's hard for me to let go of you, so I'm just trying to hold on.”
Eddie’s soul felt like it’d left his body and was hovering above you both. It’d been years since he last heard you sing along to his music and Jesus fuckin’ Christ had his memory not done you justice. “I still think you could’ve joined us and been lead singer.”
You laughed, smiling a little self-consciously. “What? And steal the spotlight from you?”
“Oh, sweetheart, that light always belonged to you.”
Eyes flashing, you ducked your head but Eddie still caught sight of your pleased smile. “You didn’t answer the question.”
“You really need to ask?” You had to know, especially for one of their more popular songs, everyone knew. It was still one of the questions he got most in interviews – who the song was about. Not that he ever said it, even to his friends. But to the people who’d known, they didn’t have to ask.
“Validation is nice,” you teased.
Eddie took a moment to really take you in. Hands intertwined on your lap, ID badge around your neck, and despite looking utterly exhausted, you were still the most beautiful person he’d ever had the sheer dumb luck of knowing.
“Yeah, Hopper,” he heard himself say, your eyes darting up to meet his, “none of my songs could be about anyone else.”
Well shit -- he’d never admitted anything that vulnerable in years.
“Even now?” You joked, trying to alleviate the sudden tension around you both. But Eddie hadn’t ever lied to you and he wasn’t going to start now.
“Yeah, even now.”
At that, your head whirled towards him and he saw something flicker behind your ten-foot castle walls. Something familiar.
The device on your hip beeped loudly and you jumped to your feet. “Sorry,” you scrambled for the tiny thing. “It’s my beeper, I’m being paged for a new patient. I’ll try to see how your paperwork is going and if we can speed things along. I…um, I – this was nice.”
Nice? He could work with nice! You smiled at him, hesitating with your hand on the door knob.
But, like the idiot he still was, Eddie nodded dumbly and said nothing while he watched you walk out his door.
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“Nice? That was nice? What the hell?” You said out loud to yourself, taking another inhale of the cigarette between your fingers. Like the wimp you were, you’d taken your break on the last floor, crawling out to the shitty makeshift terrace the west wing had. The night shift rarely came out here, but you loved the view – downtown Indianapolis was beautiful. High-rise buildings with their scattered lights and the sharp wind from the corner usually helped you decompress. Clearly, tonight, you needed nicotine reinforcements.
If your roommate could see you now, she’d smack you. In your very well mounted defense, you hadn’t expected to see Eddie Munson of all people in your emergency room tonight. You hated that your first instinct, after your shock, had been to check your reflection in a mirror.
It’d been more years than you could count – being around Eddie should not affect you as much as it clearly still did. He was in your past, you reminded yourself, taking another drag. Max and Robin had always had an ongoing agenda to remind you that Eddie was always an option now that you’d both grown into yourselves.
At the reminder of Max, you needed to remind yourself to strangle her. Just this morning she’d said she had no idea where they were playing next – clearly, that had been a lie.
You felt off balance and you hated it. The past few years you’d spent making sure you had all your ducks in a row. You had studied hard, travelled around the country, and learned from the best of the best. Despite feeling intimidated by Brad’s confidence in his career, almost two years later you knew what he’d meant now. You were meant to be a doctor – and you were a damn good one. While you didn’t want to stay in the ER, you knew you had a reputation for being unshakeable.
And your ex-boyfriend walks in and it throws you for a loop? What the fuck. You needed this shift to be over, for him to leave, and a bath with some wine as soon as possible. Checking your watch, you groaned when you realized you had more than half of it to go.
Replaying your last interaction on a loop, you groaned again. Why had you let him convince you to stay in his room?
You knew the answer.
His dumb big, wide, brown eyes had always been your weak spot. And look at where that had gotten you – rehashing things that didn’t need remembering. Not with him. Or maybe? You took another long drag and pinched the bridge of your nose. Why was this so complicated? And why the hell did it feel like you had a swarm of pterodactyls in your stomach every time he looked at you…with those stupid eyes. Like you meant something to him.
“Aren’t doctors always telling people not to smoke?” A voice asked, startling the shit out of you.
Almost dropping your mostly finished cigarette, you whirled around and gaped when you saw Eddie standing there. “How the fuck did you get here?”
He grinned, the sight immediately warming you. “I asked a nurse for you; she said you always took your breaks out here.”
“You need an ID to get into the room that leads here,” you said, dumbly.
“Turns out, she’s a Corroded Coffins fan,” he said, grinning shamelessly. “After a photo and an autograph, she let me through.”
Scowling at the unprofessionalism, you guessed. “Emma?”
He nodded and waved a hand. “It happens all the time, don’t worry. Besides, you never came back.”
“I – I had a gunshot wound to the leg and it took a while to change,” you said, motioning to your new black scrubs.
Eddie took a few more hesitant steps towards you. “I didn’t know you smoked, last I remembered you hated that about me,” he said, nodding towards the cigarette in your hand.
“It’s a horrible habit,” you admitted immediately, deciding to be honest, “I only do it when I’m stressed.”
The city around you buzzed with life. “ER doctor feels like the wrong profession then…”
You hated the fact that you laughed. Not even able to stop it, you brought a hand up to your mouth, surprised. Not knowing what to say, you offer him one from the carton in your hand.
To your utter surprise, he shook his head. “Haven’t smoked in years,” he said and you noted that he made sure to stay upwind of the cigarette. “The love of my life once told me she hated it and well, I stopped.”
You quirked your brow, deeply ignoring how your heart skipped. “Stop moving that arm around so much, once the meds wear off it’ll hurt,” you said, changing the subject because what the hell did you say to that? Taking another drag, you exhaled the smoke.
He smiled at you like he knew what you were doing. Shit, he probably did. “I can’t help it, you know that.”
“I didn’t ask before but…doctor huh? Last I heard you wanted to be a teacher,” Eddie said, scuffing his shoe against the gravel.
You couldn’t help the way your brows raised. How had he known you’d considered being a teacher? “Keeping tabs on me?” He smiled and when he didn’t answer you shrugged. “After what happened, seeing you…”
The memory of Eddie on the floor, scratches and gouges all over his body while he laid unnaturally still in your lap haunted you. Sometimes, after bad shifts, you’d still have the same nightmare where you weren’t able to get him out in time. You could hear the sound of him choking on his own blood, your own voice screaming at him to stay awake. Steve’s frantic hands as he hauled Eddie through the gate.
“Almost bleed out?” He prompted, tone light.
“Yeah,” you cleared your throat and stubbed the cigarette out. “I never wanted to feel that helpless ever again.”
At your confession, he quieted. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable, not like you’d expected.  It wasn’t charged like earlier…it was nice. “Yeah,” he said, “I knew you were a doctor. Dustin told me, sent me a Polaroid of your graduation.”
“That little shit.”
Eddie laughed. “I asked for it, don’t blame him.”
“Why?” You asked, shocked. Everyone had assured you that he’d reach out eventually – he had to. But he never did. In all fairness, neither had you.
His eyes came to yours, stare serious and the air shifting from light to something heavier. “You know why.”
Electricity crackled between you. Eyes drawn to his you had to curl your hand around the railing to avoid the urge you had to reach for him. “I started smoking in college. It helped take the edge of every once in a while,” you shrugged. “The scent reminded me of you. Helped me, I don’t know, calm down? It’s soothing, I guess. I had a tangible part of you that I could keep with me.”
Surprised at your own candor, you bit your cheek. You had never admitted that to anyone. Everyone assumed you’d picked it up after having snuck one off your dad or Joyce. You risked a glance up at him and your heart jumped to your throat. If the electricity was on high before, the look in his eyes made it palpable.
Like magnets, you both took a few steps towards each other. His hand reached for yours and your heart slammed against your rib cage, revving like an engine. “Hopper…I-”
The door behind him slammed open, surprising you again. Gareth stumbled in and you bit a smile back at the death glare Eddie shot him. “I think I just promised one of the nurses my first born to get here.”
You laughed, feeling Eddie’s eyes on you.
“Claire sent me to find you, she’s on a rampage. You can’t just run off dude,” Gareth said good naturedly.
Eddie sighed. “Sorry.”
“S’all good, she’s getting the paperwork for you discharge. She found a nurse on the second floor and I’m pretty sure he’s already asked her on a date.”
You snorted and Gareth grinned at you. “So, Doc, is he cleared to go? We’ve got a plane to catch in the morning. Helene said she’d cover for you for the rest of the tour if we needed to. Claire and Warren think you can sit and sing if you’re feeling up to it.”
Reality crashed into you. Of course. They were on tour. You and Eddie were in the past - a fond memory that stung a little still but was fond nonetheless.
“Uh yeah, he should be fine. Make sure he keeps the sling on for at least two weeks. No guitar playing but singing is fine. The nurse should explain in detail to Claire.”
“Great!” Gareth clapped his hands, glancing between you both. Your fingers itched to grab another cigarette as your stress climbed. “Helene’s on her way to Chicago.” Gareth added when no one spoke.
Eddie grunted and it spurred you into action. You reached out and rested your hand on Eddie’s arm. “It was nice to see you both,” you said, smiling at Gareth. Gathering up all the courage you had available, you reached up and kissed Eddie’s cheek. His breath hitched and you scrambled back towards safety. “Be careful, okay? Take care of the arm.”
Eddie’s stare felt like physical touch but you tugged Gareth into a hug and ignored him. The beeper in your scrubs screeched and you almost sighed in relief. “That’s my cue,” you said, waving the flashing screen in the air, “have a safe flight.”
Whirling around, you’d made it three steps before Eddie’s voice stopped you. “Hopper!”
“Yeah?”
He blinked at you, as if surprised you’d stopped. “When’s your shift end?”
You smiled at your first love and decided to indulge yourself for the moment. Eyes trailing down him, taking in his features and how little he’d changed. His hair was still wild and curly, his hands still waved in the air as he spoke, and he still chewed on his bottom lip when he was nervous. You still knew him well enough to know what he wasn’t saying. “You were my first patient of the night. I’m on until morning, probably a bit past that since we’re short-staffed.” The beeper screeched again and you winced. If it was an attending, they were going to be on your ass for the rest of the night. “I gotta go, I’m sorry.” Sorry that’s all you had, sorry this didn’t magically fix everything, sorry for not going with you. Sorry for…still loving you? “Bye.”
Before the door closed behind you, you heard Gareth’s unmistakable laughter and voice boom. “When does your shift end? That’s the best you got? Dude.”
A muffled groan made you smile and you shook your head. This night was going to be a wild, crazy, memory. That’s all. You had patients to see.
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You were dead on your feet, squinting at the offending sun as you walked towards your car in the parking lot. “See you Monday, Hopper!” A coworker called out. You waved a hand towards them. The next break in your schedule had managed to line up with the weekend. Despite the miracle, you were already planning on spending most of it sleeping and catching up on your notes. Stifling a yawn, you dug through your bag to try and find your keys.
Where the fuck were they? You groaned, blindly feeling around for the key ring. As you rounded the corner you froze. What the hell? Eddie was sitting on the hood of your car. His hair was tucked into a beanie, sunglasses perched on the bridge of his nose, and his green cast in a sling.  
Your feet carried you towards his smiling figure. “Hey? I thought – you…a plane?” Exhaustion scrambled your brain but Eddie seemed to understand what you meant - he always had.
“I can take a later one,” he said, squatting to pick up a coffee cup off the ground. “I don’t know if your order has changed but I got you this from the shop down the street.”
“Oh my god, I love you,” you said. Exhaustion and desperation drove you to practically dive for the cup. Taking a long gulp, you curled your fingers against the warmth.
Eddie froze as you continued to gulp it down. “Never thought I’d hear those words again.”
What? You thought, realizing a beat too late. Flustered, you didn’t know what to say to his teasing.
“I’m going to say something and if I’m reading too much into this or way out of line – feel free to slap me.”
“What?”
“Just…I need to say it. I have to – I can’t keep going on through life wondering what if.”
“Don’t overthink it…The what if, that’ll kill you. Or, it almost killed me.”
You swallowed around the sudden lump in your throat and nodded.
“I want to give this a shot,” Eddie said, inhaling deeply, “I still love you, sweetheart. I think I always have. I know that it’s different and it’s been far longer than it should have been but I want to try. Seeing you again tonight, I…I don’t think there will ever be anyone else but you for me.”
Emotions overwhelmed you, eyes tearing up. “Eddie,” you breathed, hands coming up to his as if by instinct.
His eyes didn’t stray from you and he continued. “I let this go because I thought - I thought it was what was best at the time. I’m not making the same mistake twice.” Eddie leaned forward, eyes darting between yours and you knew he was giving you the chance to back away – to say no.
Did you want to say no? Wasn’t this chasing the past? What if you both ended up hurting each other all over again? It was clear you’d both never moved on from your break up.
And yet…the soft look in his eyes reminded you of leaning against his locker, his body caging you in. His hair would hide the halls, the entire world, and you’d be pinned in place by his stare. Eddie would kiss his way up from your neck and one of your friends would always manage to find you two. They’d give you shit for it but, Eddie would flip them off before pressing his lips back down to yours. Their jeering fading into the background while his hands trailed down your body.
Just because it’d been years ago didn’t make it any less important. Any less crucial. And most importantly, the years hadn’t wiped the longing.
Without overthinking it, for once in your life, you surged up and pressed your lips to his. Eddie’s right hand trailed around your hip and pulled you into him. Mindful of his sling, you cradled his face and kept him close.
His teeth nipped at your bottom lip, making familiar heat pool in your stomach, and you were almost embarrassed by the harsh exhale you let out. You felt his smile against your lips and not one to be left behind, you let your lips find that spot you knew like the back of your hand. His scruff tickled your skin as you worried at the skin on the underside of his jaw and you grinned when he let out a quiet moan.
Your bodies slotted into each other like two puzzle pieces and they rekindled the flame that had somehow seemed to never have gone out. After a while, you needed to calm your breathing before you both managed to get arrested for public indecency. Taking a huge step back, you brought your hand up to your lips – afraid this had been a fever dream.
“Where are you going?” Eddie whined, chasing after you.
Grinning, you held his good hand between yours and brought it up to your lips. Brushing a kiss against his knuckles, you watched his eyes darken and smiled. His hair looked wilder than normal, his lips swollen and red. He looked happy. You were sure you looked a similar.
“How do you know I’m not dating anyone? I could be,” you teased, arms trailing down to rest comfortably on his waist.
“First, if you’re going to kiss me like that – if you were dating someone, I’d be appalled,” he joked, shooting you a knowing look. “Dustin told me. I called him an hour ago to ask for his advice. He likes to remind me periodically that you won’t be single for long. He really didn’t like the last guy uh-”
You reared back. “Jared? He was nice!”
“If it makes you feel any better my last quasi-relationship was like a year ago and Dustin wouldn’t even look at her when she tried speaking to him,” Eddie said. You bit back your laughter because that was definitely something you could see Dustin doing.
“The little asshole.”
“Right?”
“We can’t tell him about this. Not yet,” you said quickly. God, especially not Dustin – he’d be unbearable. He spent almost all of your trips home screaming Eddie’s praises.
Eddie’s entire face lit up. “So there is a this to tell?”
How could you have ever thought you could’ve fooled yourself into thinking this night wouldn’t have mattered? That Eddie was someone you could move on from? “I mean, I let you kiss me, didn’t I?” You teased.
“That’s true, you would’ve decked me if you wanted me off,” he said, nose coming down to your neck, teeth nipping at the skin there.
“I do have mean right hook,” you said, breathless.
“Oh, I remember,” he laughed and you knew he was picturing you decking Tommy at a party senior year for harassing Steve and Nancy.
After beat, your insecurities started to creep into the bubble. “What are we doing? I still…I still love you. I don’t think I ever really stopped but we’re different people now. We don’t really know this version of us anymore. Not the way we used to.”
Eddie’s hand came up to cradle your face softly. “Trust me, I haven’t changed much,” he said and you snorted. “It doesn’t matter. We can love each other and take it slow. We can learn the new stuff and enjoy the things that stayed the same. I’ll do whatever you want because, honestly, I don’t know what we’re doing either. But I do know that I’m not letting you go. Not a second time. I know my schedule is hectic – my career is chaotic - and all over the place for months on end but…”
You smiled, tightening your arms around him and finally feeling like the earth had snapped back onto its axis. “But we can try?” Because wasn’t it worth it? For him? Without question.
Eddie’s eyes closed and he leaned his forehead against yours. “We can definitely try.”
As the sun warmed you both, you glanced up at Eddie’s beaming smile and you nodded. It wouldn’t be easy, you’d both stumble and have to adjust to the new things, your careers, and living in different cities but…the timing was right. Again. Didn’t people always say lightning never struck twice? And yet, timing was everything.
A/N2: There's also no way in hell a metal band would be singing something as slow as When You're Gone but yolo, I'm the captain now.
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justforbooks · 5 months
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Matthew Perry was a Friend to all, known the world over as Chandler Bing, always seconds away from a great wisecrack and a show-stopping grin. But he was also an addict. That was the “big, terrible thing” Perry referenced in the title of his memoir last year, giving it equal weighting with the TV series that made him an indelible celebrity, long after he had largely retreated from screens.
I read Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing last year and found it a jarring, often uncomfortable experience. It was one part juicy celebrity memoir, enlivened by the flashes of humour and winning self-deprecation that Perry (by his own admission) shared with his defining character; and one part harrowing account of a man intent on his own destruction.
Perry characterised himself as a ready-made, just-add-water addict: an alcoholic with his first drink at the age of 14, and hooked on painkillers with his first pill, prescribed after a jetski accident. High, he drove a red Mustang convertible across the desert, feeling “complete and utter euphoria”: “I remember thinking, ‘If this doesn’t kill me, I’m doing this again.’” It didn’t then.
Nearly a year to the day after Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing was published, Perry was found dead at his Los Angeles home in an apparent drowning. He was 54. Tributes from his friends and fans have rightly focused on Perry’s character and talent, with actors Morgan Fairchild (who played Perry’s on-screen mother) mourning “the loss of such a brilliant young actor” and Mira Sorvino of his “singular wit”. Even the Canadian prime minister, Justin Trudeau, (who knew Perry as a boy, and whom Perry claimed in his memoir to have beaten up) paid tribute to the “schoolyard games we used to play … Thanks for all the laughs, Matthew”.
Indeed, though Perry’s career never took off beyond Friends, he was arguably the standout performer in a talented cast of six. Any good-looking guy can be the smart-aleck, cracking jokes in the corner, but Perry imbued Chandler with energy and emotional depth.
Though defined by his deadpan delivery – Perry is right, when he wrote “that Chandler Bing transformed the way that America spoke” – he also had exceptional comic timing, and was a great physical performer. No one else has so effectively communicated combined dating anxiety and needing to pee. The fact that Perry managed to more or less keep it together over 10 seasons and 236 episodes, often while juggling ferocious substance abuse, is only further testament to his talent.
The success of Friends – not to mention the support from his castmates, his real-life friends – was what helped him to survive, Perry wrote. “There was no way I could have been a journeyman actor. I wouldn’t have stayed sober for that; it was not worth not doing heroin for that … When you’re earning $1m a week, you can’t afford to have the 17th drink.”
Perry also had a tricky part to play within the ensemble, in taking a platonic friendship between two cynics into a heartfelt romance. Chandler and Monica was Friend’s central love story, with none of the cushioning contrivances and strategic “breaks” of the series’ other pairings. In TV, as well as life, it’s harder to make yourself vulnerable and offer love steadily than it is to give in to doubt and run hot-and-cool: Perry showed that the smart guy, even the mean guy, could also be the nice guy you’d do well to marry.
In a series that has otherwise aged fairly poorly, Chandler and Monica are still an aspirational model for an equal partnership. As a teenager, I found it sweet when Chandler told Monica: “They can say that you’re high maintenance, but it’s OK, because I like … maintaining you.” As a far-from-easygoing, thirtysomething single woman, it is perhaps the most desirable declaration of love I’ve ever seen.
It is no wonder Perry was so beloved for his character. “For the longest time,” he wrote, he experienced it as a burden, though he had lately reached some kind of peace with Friends as his legacy. “If you’re going to be typecast, that’s the way to do it.” But at the widespread shock at his death, as the world woke up to the news on Sunday morning, you can picture Perry raising one quizzical eyebrow. As he wrote himself: “I didn’t stand a fucking chance.”
Perry might not have risked 17 drinks on set – but he would certainly try for 16. Especially during the later seasons of Friends, he was routinely drunk, high or hungover on set, prompting concern from Jennifer Aniston. (“‘We can smell it,’ she said, in a kind of weird but loving way.”) Even a “sober companion” to shadow him at work proved insufficient safeguard: when a read-through was cut short by Perry’s incoherence, the entire cast staged an intervention. When The One With Monica and Chandler’s Wedding aired, in May 2001, Perry was living in rehab.
For all Perry’s amusing celebrity anecdotes and determined good cheer, Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing reads primarily as an addiction memoir without an ending. Indeed, it read as though it had almost been written in real time: Perry’s colon had exploded in July 2019, only three years before its publication, and in January 2022 he underwent his 14th surgery relating to his drug addiction. “I finally have rock-hard abs, but they aren’t from sit-ups,” he wrote, perkily.
Perry described, often, the reward he drew from supporting other addicts: “The best thing about me, bar none, is that … I can help a desperate man get sober.” Nonetheless, I was struck while reading it that the more recent timeline of Perry’s using and abusing was somewhat opaque. It felt somewhat strategic: an attempt to obscure his current reality and lend heft to the suggestion that the worst of his troubles were behind him. But even Perry himself – no doubt encouraged to come to a positive conclusion – could not find a more upbeat note with which to end on than the fact that he was alive at all.
For all its gestures to sobriety, “looking forward” and moving into the future, the final chapter reads like Perry speaking from beyond the grave, reflecting on the faces of his loved ones as if he has already passed on.
The world might be shocked at his untimely death, but Perry knew that his addiction was going to kill him; he told us in print a year ago, in a book that reached six figures in sales. Indeed, he wrote, his most surprising takeaway was that it hadn’t already.
“There are two kinds of drug addicts,” Perry wrote of his preference for opiates over cocaine. “The ones who want to go up, and the ones who want to go down … I wanted to melt into my couch and feel wonderful.” You can only hope that, now, he is as close to happiness as he felt that morning in the red Mustang.
Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?
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beanghostprincess · 2 months
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Shuggy being a case of fandom loving pretty boys is so on point. I’m active on both the anti and proshipping sides of the fandom, and for antis the hate is the usual. But I was surprised by the visceral hatred I’d see for shuggy from some proshippers I knew. It’s always Buggy they hate because they find him too nasty and unappealing to fit into their kinks/romantic fantasies. Even the ones with the worst problematic ships I’ve seen would shit on the idea of seeing Buggy romantically, and i feel it’s because they can’t make Buggy into either a pretty baby boy bottom or a hot daddy hunk. 
But the thing that haters from both sides had in common? They only liked m|m ships with the goodlooking and cool characters, and never the ‘unattractive and annoying’ characters.
Majority of the time, the fans who devote themselves to characters like Usopp, Ceaser Clown, Gecko Moria, Vinsmoke brothers, i never see a word from them complaining about shuggy or Buggy ships.
The fans that keep hating are the ones that can only accept m|m ships with characters they see as aesthetically pleasing, so they can envision them as pure both visually outside and character-wise inside. I feel so much about it is this obsession with purity and conventional attractiveness. (sorry to come in and rant i saw that ask and my experiences flashed before my eyes because i been in this fandom too long)
Yeah, no, I haven't been in this fandom that long but you're definitely right. And it happens in every fandom, too. People only like to ship characters they feel attracted to and, well, I can't judge because that's just how everybody's personal experience and journey in the fandom is and if I don't like it I will simply just ignore these people. But it's always so frustrating to see really great characters with a lot of potential get ignored just because they don't fit the beauty standard people want.
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archiveikemen · 3 months
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Abe no Yasuchika Main Story: Loving You END
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This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection. I do not own any of the original content. Please support CYBIRD by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.
❥・• Warnings and FAQ
The day talks about the armistice between the Shogunate, Rebel Army, and Imperial Court reached a conclusion.
Yasuchika asked me…
Yasuchika: I’m going to ask you the same thing one last time. Just tell me honestly what your choice is, you don't have to worry about me.
(Huh?)
Yasuchika: Do you want to return to Kamakura?
Yasuchika was no longer smiling.
He waited for my answer with a serious look in his eyes.
Yuno: I…
I thought hard about it before answering.
Yuno: I’d love to live in Kamakura with the other members of the Shogunate, but…
Yuno: We can still write letters to one another when we’re living apart.
Yuno: Just like how I’ve bonded with my allies at the Okura Castle, I want to foster new friendships and strengthen bonds in Kyoto too.
Yasuchika: — I see.
Yuno: Of course, with you too, Yasuchika.
(The bond between Yasuchika, Akihito, and Ibuki is a twisted one.)
(I hope that, someday, they can acknowledge one another as allies without hesitation.)
That was something that could only be achieved over time… and that was why this moment of peace was so precious.
Yuno: Erm, please don't restrain yourself from expressing that you’re concerned about me.
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Yasuchika: I’m not going to, but… up till now, I’ve been trampling on and destroying your hope, so I’ll be mindful of that.
Yuno: Oh…
Yasuchika: Anyway, let’s do it this way.
Yasuchika: For as long as the armistice is still ongoing, you’re free to visit Kamakura as you please.
Yasuchika: And therefore, as a member of the Imperial Court, I will do everything in my power to maintain this peace and harmony.
Yuno: Yasuchika…
(I don't know of any promise that can be more reassuring than this one.)
Yuno: Thank you. Please allow me to help you with that too.
Yasuchika: You’ll be of great help.
Yasuchika: Just having you by my side is enough to give me the strength of a hundred men.
His gaze, as sweet as honey, made me burn up from the inside.
I covered up my embarrassment with a smile.
Yuno: I’m afraid of what might happen if you’re so sweet to me, you know?
Yasuchika: I don’t mind. I’ll take that as a challenge.
(I can tell that he meant what he just said. It's making me so incredibly happy, I’m embarrassed.)
Yasuchika: I might adore you way more than you think I do.
Yuno: Hmm… I could say the same.
Yuno: I adore y— mmph.
He planted a kiss on my hair, cutting my words off.
Yuno: W-What was that for?
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Yasuchika: Hm? Because you’re adorable.
Yasuchika: A shame I didn’t get to hear you say “I adore you”, though.
Yasuchika: Can you say it again?
Yuno: I don't mind, although…
(Saying it again feels more embarrassing than the first time.)
Yuno: I adore… ah
This time, he kissed me on the lips.
Yasuchika: Oh, I couldn't hear you finish the sentence.
Yuno: Hey… you weren't listening to me in the first place, were you?
I knew that was definitely blushing bright red at that point and turned my face away…
Yasuchika: My bad, my bad. I’ll listen properly this time, so please say it again.
Yasuchika flashed me a seductive grin and brought his face closer to mine.
Our foreheads together, we gazed into each other's eyes so close up that our breaths mingled.
Yasuchika: Come on. Let me hear you say it.
Yuno: …
(This is so unfair.)
(His eyes that sparkle only for me, his gentle voice, all of it…)
Yuno: Yasuchika.
Yasuchika: Yeah?
Yuno: … I adore you a lot.
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Yasuchika: … Mm-hm.
Yasuchika smiled happily and our lips met…
Yuno: Nn… mm…
His skilled tongue slid through my slightly parted lips as he caressed my hair.
Yuno: Mmph… ah…
I let out a wanton noise as his tongue stimulated the sensitive spot in my mouth.
Our kiss ended with a brief wet sound…
Yasuchika: I love you. With all my heart.
Even the way he exhaled was oozing with sensuality, making my head spin.
Yuno: … I feel like I’ll continue being messed with by you even when we’re lovers.
Yasuchika: I personally think you’re way better than me at doing that.
Yasuchika chuckled and took my hand.
Yasuchika: It’s about time we get going.
Yasuchika: There’s going to be a “welcome back” banquet for you tonight.
Yuno: Really!?
Yasuchika: Yup. I just found out about it this morning, His Majesty and Ibuki were the ones who organised it.
(I’m so happy to hear that.)
Looking forward to tonight, I tightly squeezed Yasuchika’s hand.
That night…
Yuno: I didn’t know Ibuki had a mansion in Kyoto!
Ibuki: Yeah.
Akihito: It’s a convenient place to hold a banquet, because it has plenty of alcohol.
We had a banquet in one of the rooms at a mansion that was located somewhere quiet.
Yasuchika: It’s fine to use Ibuki’s hideout for a banquet but…
I followed Yasuchika’s gaze to see what he was looking at…
Kurama: Oi, there isn't enough alcohol.
Tamamo: The snacks here are acceptable. As expected of Sutoku’s refined tastes.
Yasuchika: Why are Tamamo and Kurama here? It’s not that I’m not happy about their presence, though?
Tamamo: I have a contract with Yuno, of course I have the rights to attend a banquet held for her.
Kurama: I wouldn't have shown up if I knew this was Ibuki’s hideout.
Despite having said that, Kurama was filling his cup with sake and showed no intention to stop.
Kurama: Tamamo brought me here, saying that this is where the strong fighters are gathered.
Yuno: Everyone here is strong, excluding myself, so he isn't wrong to say that…
(Akihito may appear to be graceful, but he is said to be able to make use of Ibuki’s powers and his curse to use kotodama.)
Akihito: Are you not strong yourself, Yuno?
Akihito: It’s impressive that you have the ability to absorb a demon’s cursed powers regardless of how strong it is.
Yuno: No, that’s not…
I hurriedly shook my head, Kurama’s red eyes sharpened.
Kurama: That’s bullshit. Even if their powers have been taken away, they can easily crush her using physical force.
(S-Scary.)
Ibuki: You’re so naive, Kurama.
Kurama: What?
Ibuki: Yuno may have weak physical appearance, but a couple of words from her is enough to sway Yasuchika.
(Now that’s clearly an exaggeration.)
Yasuchika: I mean, I’ll surely do my best for Yuno.
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Kurama: …
Kurama stared at me without blinking.
Yuno: W-What?
Kurama: I don't get it. Yasuchika is the only human being who can waltz into the underworld whenever he wants to and do as he pleases.
Kurama: You’re a very mediocre woman, and yet someone like him is this obsessed with you.
(I can’t say anything because that’s true.)
Ibuki: Naive.
Tamamo: Naive, indeed.
Akihito: So naive.
Yasuchika: Too naive.
(Hm?)
Kurama: What.
Everyone besides Kurama and I said the same thing.
Yasuchika: Yuno is a lot more powerful than you think, Kurama.
Yasuchika: I strongly advise against making an enemy of her.
Akihito: And because she harbours no ill intentions, she's able to easily find her way into people's hearts without them realising it.
Ibuki: That’s because Yuno can see through a person’s true nature.
(What’s going on with this series of backhanded compliments…)
Kurama: I still don’t get it. Can I torture this little girl a little to confirm everything you all said about her?
Yuno: Absolutely not!
I quickly spoke up to break the tension.
Yuno: You are all exaggerating. I’m only an ordinary apothecary with no special abilities.
Kurama: We’ll find that out soon enough.
Having lost interest in the topic, Kurama finished the sake in his cup.
Tamamo: Personally, I can’t figure out why would Yuno pick Yasuchika.
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Yasuchika: That’s mean.
Tamamo: You only get to speak after you’ve reflected on what you've done.
Tamamo directed his gaze back at me
Tamamo: Yuno. Is he really the right man for you?
Tamamo: Based on what I think — if you’re going to choose a human being, a man like Yoritomo would be a good choice.
Yasuchika: …!
(Yoritomo!?)
Yuno: Even if he’s only being used as an example, that’s still quite scary…
Tamamo: Is it? Although he has a slight flaw which is his habit of prioritising official matters over his personal life… Yoritomo is a capable and fair man.
Tamamo: Once the two of you become romantic partners, he will definitely never hurt you or put you in uncomfortable situations.
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Yasuchika: …
Yasuchika had been silent for some time, and I sensed his uneasiness when I met his eyes.
(This is embarrassing to say, but… I should say it properly.)
Yuno: Lord Yoritomo is indeed a person of outstanding character, and I naturally have great respect for him.
Yuno: But the only person I ever want to be in love with… is Yasuchika.
Yuno: I remained fond of him even after my memories were taken away. Yasuchika is the only one I love, no one else.
Yasuchika: — Yuno.
I nodded firmly at Yasuchika, who sat there with his eyes slightly widened in surprise.
Tamano: … I see.
Tamamo: Yasuchika.
Tamamo: Be careful on moonless nights. I don't have confidence in my ability to hold myself back from sneaking an attack on you.
Kurama: …! Tamamo, come at me first if a fight is what you want.
Ibuki: Things will get messy, just be quiet.
Without saying a word, Kurama sent a wind blade flying towards Ibuki’s throat.
Ibuki skillfully deflects it with his sword.
(That was so dangerous!)
Everyone, except for me, remained calm as if it were a regular occurrence; and so I refrained from screaming.
(Spending time with Yasuchika seems to have trained me for such situations…)
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Yasuchika: Nevertheless — Tamamo, you’re nasty for deliberately bringing up Lord Yoritomo’s name.
Tamamo: Occasionally experiencing something undesirable isn’t such a bad thing, you know.
Yasuchika smiled wryly and turned his gaze back onto me.
Yasuchika: Thanks, Yuno.
Yasuchika: I’ll do my best to become a man worthy of your feelings.
Ibuki: That’s a very heartwarming declaration, but there are plenty of other issues in Kyoto that require fixing first.
Kurama: Speaking of which, didn’t those cowardly Onmyoji underlings of yours run away?
Yasuchika: That’s correct, but a few have returned and asked to restart their training from scratch.
Yasuchika: I was a little surprised to hear that, so I did a reassessment of them.
Tamamo: … You’re too used to being surrounded by useless people.
(Yasuchika’s subordinates were overly reliant on him…)
I couldn’t help but agree with Tamamo’s statement, after recalling the time I spent assisting Yasuchika in dealing with ayakashi in Kyoto.
Ibuki: He doesn't realise that he sacrificed himself more than he trampled upon other people. You’re surprisingly quite cute, Yasuchika.
Yasuchika: Can you not talk as if you know me very well?
Yasuchika shot Ibuki with an icy glare.
Yasuchika: Back to the topic…
Yasuchika: I’m actually thinking of opening up the Onmyo Bureau to not only the children from noble families, but to commoners as well.
Yuno: Really!?
(It’d be great if people who aren't born into nobility could have the opportunity to serve in the imperial court.)
Tamamo: Would someone who has never experienced the world of the nobles be able to survive in the imperial court?
Yasuchika: I’m planning to form a specialised educational institution that not only teaches Onmyo techniques, but also culture and principles of governance.
Yasuchika: It’ll be a place where people and children from all walks of life can learn and grow.
Yuno: Wow! I like the sound of that.
Yasuchika: Children who possess large amounts of spiritual power often struggle because no one understands them.
Yasuchika: Even if they decide not to become an Onmyoji in the future, it’d benefit them to know how to control their abilities.
(Yasuchika himself grew up in a toxic and dysfunctional environment…)
(I’m confident that he can guide those children to a path of righteousness and kindness.)
Kurama: So a bunch of people who can’t use their powers without receiving training. Boring.
Yuno: I think that’s the case for most ordinary individuals…
Tamamo: Won’t the nobles have objections, though?
Akihito: Their objections won't be tolerated.
The look in Akihito’s eyes was both elegant and unsettling at the same time.
Akihito: Since Yasuchika has expressed his determination to carry out this plan, I will do whatever I can to silence anyone who may be against it.
(Akihito…)
Akihito: Although, as much as I’d like to say that, there actually aren’t many court nobles at the moment who can criticise Yasuchika.
Akihito: After all, he’s the most powerful Onmyoji in all of history, who even commanded the Four Gods.
Ibuki: Previously, Akihito held real power behind the scenes, but he didn't have complete control over the upper ranks of the court.
Ibuki: Those who took advantage of that and burdened Yasuchika with unreasonable demands should be shaking in their sandals by now.
Yasuchika: I have quite an impressive job position, but I’ll put it to full use for as long as it lasts.
(All this time, Yasuchika remained calm and fulfilled his duties well while in a stressful environment.)
(From now on, I hope the imperial court becomes a place where Yasuchika can feel at ease.)
Akihito: — Yasuchika, won’t this be more burdensome for you?
Yasuchika: Not at all. If anything, my heart now feels lighter instead.
Yasuchika looked directly at Akihito.
Yasuchika: Up till now, I believed that pitting the Shogunate and Rebel Army against each other was the only way to fulfil Your Majesty's wish.
Yasuchika: But now that I didn't choose that option… I want to find a different way to fulfil Your Majesty's wish, one that doesn't require us to walk into the darkness.
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Akihito: …
Akihito: Thank you, Yasuchika.
(I’m glad…)
Ibuki: Your baby bird has left the nest. Feeling lonely, Akihito?
Akihito: Isn’t this what people call a new beginning? This is a cause for joy.
Tamamo, having been staring silently at Yasuchika for a while, sighed.
Tamamo: I understand now. You seem to have truly changed, Yasuchika.
Yasuchika: Eh?
Tamamo: Your old self lacked something very important, despite having a good understanding of human psychology.
Tamamo: You’ve become much more human, Yasuchika.
Tamamo: Yuno’s sincerity and strength must’ve changed you.
Yuno: Tamamo…
(It feels reassuring to hear that coming from Tamamo, someone who knows of Yasuchika’s past.)
(I’m glad I could create change in Yasuchika, even if it’s something small.)
Akihito: Tamamo. Did you come all the way here tonight just to ascertain that?
Ibuki: When I saw the fox who hates Yasuchika to the core like a snake and a scorpion arrived, I thought it was going to be a disaster.
Tamamo: I have to personally make sure that he’s a suitable man I can entrust my dear Yuno to.
I smiled at Tamamo who gave me a wink.
Yuno: Thank you, Tamamo!
Yasuchika: The people around you are very critical of me, aren't they, Yuno?
Tamamo: Got a problem with that?
Yasuchika: — Nope. This is great, actually.
Yasuchika: I’ll make all of you acknowledge that I’m capable of making Yuno happy.
(... I’m happy to know he thinks of me this way.)
My embarrassment was overcome by the amount of joy I was feeling, and I discreetly covered my blushing face with my hand.
After the party, everyone returned to their respective places of residence…
Yasuchika and I were getting ready for bed in his room.
Yasuchika: This should be good enough.
Yasuchika: Come over here, Yuno.
Yuno: … Okay.
I approached Yasuchika, who had his arms spread out on the mattress, and we laid side by side.
Yasuchika: Have you gotten used to sleeping together like this?
Yuno: Uh… not quite yet.
Yasuchika smiled in amusement at my honest response.
Yasuchika: That means you’ll need more practice, then.
Yuno: I-I’ll do my best…
(... No matter how many times I’ve seen him, I can’t help thinking of how attractive he is.)
(But I can’t outright say that to him.)
Yasuchika: You know, I haven't been scared of going to sleep these days.
Yuno: Eh?
Yasuchika: All along, I’d stay up till late at night because I didn't want to have any precognitive dreams, but…
Yasuchika: You gave me the strength to overcome that fear.
Yuno: Yasuchika…
My heart felt so full, and I was at a loss for words.
Yasuchika: Besides, having you in my arms seems to make it easier to fall asleep.
Yasuchika: It feels warm and comfortable… and you smell nice too.
Yasuchika: Your voice, your facial expressions, your gestures… it’s like all of it is made up of only the things I like.
(... I hope he doesn't pamper me too much with his sweet words.)
(I won’t know how to respond.)
Yuno: … Shall I sing you a lullaby again?
I mentioned a part of our memories together from before we became enemies…
Yasuchika: That’s fine too, but your singing voice isn’t the only thing I want to hear tonight.
Knowing what he meant, my heart started racing.
However…
(I’ve been on the receiving end of Yasuchika’s overflowing love for me tonight… I want to reciprocate those feelings.)
(I want to touch him and have him all to myself.)
I boldly placed my hands on Yasuchika’s chest.
Yasuchika: … Yuno? [surprised]
Yuno: … Understood. Please take all of me.
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Yasuchika: …
I gently undid the sash of Yasuchika’s sleepwear… revealing his bare skin.
I ran my hands over his smooth skin and slowly got on top of him.
Locking gazes with his dark coloured eyes that had regained their calmness made me want to move away…
Yuno: Please… close your eyes.
Yasuchika: Okay.
I kissed his thin lips to prove my feelings for him.
Our breaths touched with every peck on the lips.
(Ah.)
He suddenly grabbed my wrist…
Yasuchika: Won’t you take your clothes off too, Yuno?
Yuno: W-Well…
The way Yasuchika looked up at me from below was so sexy, it made my head spin.
Yasuchika: I want to see you. — Can’t I?
(... I decided that I want to give Yasuchika my everything today.)
Yuno: Nn… alright.
With trembling hands, I undid my own sash and exposed my completely naked body.
Yasuchika: … [staring]
Yuno: P-Please don’t stare too much…
Yasuchika: Why? You’re beautiful.
Yasuchika traced my body with his fingertips.
Yuno: Nngh… ahh… stop…
My shoulders trembled as I held myself back from collapsing onto him.
Yuno: I’m in charge tonight.
Yasuchika: Of course. — I love seeing you do all the work for me.
(When you say it like that…)
Yasuchika: But this is unusual coming from you, who’s usually shy. What’s the matter?
I let out a small noise when his fingertips grazed the peaks of my breasts as he whispered.
Yuno: Ahh… Yasuchika…
Yasuchika: Hmm?
He urged me to continue my words.
Yuno: … I was so proud of you for gaining… everyone’s recognition… but I wanted you all to myself.
Yuno: I wanted to reciprocate your feelings that you’ve expressed to me… and make you obsessed with me.
Yasuchika: … [surprised]
The look in Yasuchika’s eyes told me that my response wasn't what he expected.
(I told him everything…)
Yuno: Every day of life has been very fulfilling, and I have the love of my life right by my side… I’m being strange, aren't I?
Yasuchika: — Not strange at all.
(Yasuchika?)
Yasuchika: Since you put it that way, I’ll go crazy trying to keep you to myself.
Yasuchika: Without you knowing, I’ll get rid of everyone who wants you or tries to harm you.
Yasuchika: So that I’ll be the only one you’ll ever look at.
Yuno: That’s not what I meant…
Yasuchika: Can’t you see it?
Yuno: … No.
(Yasuchika always appears so calm.)
Yasuchika: Then I'll show you tonight.
Yasuchika slid his hands over my bare skin, sending a shiver through my back.
He held me close, so tightly that there was no room for escape.
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Yasuchika: I'm sorry. I won’t be able to let go of you for the rest of my life. I know that I’m broken, but…
Yasuchika: You’re the only one who can fill the void in my heart.
Yasuchika: In return for that, I’ll devote my life to protecting you… so please forgive me.
(— I can hear heartbeats.)
With our chests against each other's, there was no knowing whose heart was racing at that point.
I slowly closed my eyes… feeling that this was proof all our feelings had been shared with each other.
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On Cherry Blossom’s Skating Style
One thing I’ve noticed in this fandom is that many people assume that Cherry’s skating style is lesser- or easier- than many of the other skaters at “S” and that he can’t do anything without Carla. Some people also take Adam’s “boring” remark as a statement of fact rather than something meant to cause further pain to someone who was already down.
There hasn’t been a set group of people doing this, it’s pretty much all over the fandom; even fans of the character get into this mindset. And, frankly, I want to say:
Carla’s calculations don’t mean shit if Cherry doesn’t hit that angle.
Yes, Carla tells Kaoru what angle a curve is going to be and how far away it is/time to it, however, it is up to him and his skills as a skater to be able to hit that angle, and he has to hit it perfectly for her calculations to have been of any use.
Carla’s calculations as a whole are only useful for that one match as well. We’ve been shown in episode one that the “S” track is constantly changing. Multiple trees fall and a rock slide happens during Langa’s race against Shadow, and whatever scans and calculations Carla would have made on one pass down the track would be completely useless for a second run.
Carla does not skate for Cherry- if she did then there would be no need for her to calculate angles- Kaoru is the one in control and he is the one putting in most of the work. Note:
Cherry is the one who has to keep his balance and footing when his skateboard is transforming from short form to long form and vice versa.
Cherry is the one who skated a curve with his eyes closed while also dodging Adam’s Love Hug- which could have gone wrong in a multitude of ways, i.e. Cherry’s hair getting caught under his board, Adam shifting his position and running over Cherry, Adam grabbing onto Cherry’s pony tail and dragging him along the track, etc.
-
Carla’s use while skating (or observing) are also overstated by fandom. Cherry does not use Carla to determine if someone’s body tilt is off or if they should change their footing; he does that all with his own mind. Remember, this is the same character that:
Knew that Langa was a snowboarder after seeing him put his foot on a skateboard for the first time outside his studio.
Wasn’t in the least bit surprised that Langa had been snowboarding since he was 2yrs old, and comments on his improvements in skateboarding in such a short time period.
Determined that Joe’s body tilt was off and that he was losing time to Langa during their beef down to the milliseconds.
Predicted Adam’s move-set during Reki’s first beef with Adam.
Immediately recognized that Reki wasn’t doing his best during the start of his second race against Adam.
We have to remember that Carla is Cherry’s assistant. While she is very important to him (and that’s another post I’ll make later), she is not the one who is in control and never will be.
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On two (final) notes:
One, remember that it was Cherry that Reki went to to ask for help in Langa’s first beef against Adam. Remember that during that beef that Langa flashes back to Cherry’s advice to help him during the first half. And remember that during Langa’s second beef with Adam, Langa uses Cherry’s move to dodge Adam’s Love Hug Full Swing Kiss Combo.
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Two, there’s a reason why some of the S Gallery were considering Adam v. Cherry to “already be the finale”, and that’s because Cherry is a formidable opponent.
Think about how difficult it must be to face up against the “perfect skater”- and how enticing the thought of maybe beating him must be. Any little mistake you could possibly make would put you behind big time. He has the ability to change the shape of his board to go faster down the track and his skill in maneuverability was thought to the factor that would win in his beef against Adam had they actually made it to the factory as Adam’s speed wouldn’t have helped him inside the dilapidated building.
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summertimemusician · 6 months
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Linktober Day 6
Mask(s)
Soft and sweet with just a hint of melancholic because 1.I'm tired and probably need a nap father than coffee, 2.I actually managed to make a pretty good mocha and the Anchorage LOZ animatic came onto my playlist before writing this and it kind of influenced my mood, and 3. I'm saving the usual Majora's Mask flare of angst for another prompt because I was having way too much fun dissecting the tragedy of the Hero of Time before sleep deprivation snatched the idea away which is usually my sign to pass the heck out and save the second option for when I have more energy lol.
For the Warriors fans, also Warriors is a disaster of an older sibling but we adore and appreciate him for it in this household, as always can be implied romantic or platonic between him and reader.
You were all but pinned down to the ground, brought down more effectively and unable to find the strength to get up.
Well, not literally, there were no enemies nearby, the chaos at camp had long since died down and there wasn’t anything much to do now that night had fallen, the heavens deigning to put all of it’s glittering jewels on display.
Were it any other day you’d probably focus more on appreciating it in full, the fire was crackling merrily, you were safe and had a full stomach and even with the ever present threat of the Shadow possibly deciding to ambush you all while most of your guards were down, you had your boys with you and the crisp autumn petrichor was a balm on your soul, weary from the journey.
Maybe it would be fine to rest for a little while.
And then the small figure clinging to you flinched, burrowing closer and holding onto your tunic like a lifeline. And awareness came to you like a smack over the head with a log, your fingers gently carding through blond locks as you hum gently. Weighting options and just how quietly you could move without bothering the precious Sprite at your side.
You had guessed Time had been a sweet kid, and you still wanted to lodge a formal complaint with the gods for writing such cruel fate for him because the man couldn’t catch a break and you’re not the only one to take it personally. But he was killing you here, this is how you die, with an adorable but oh so heartbreakingly sad little boy having fallen asleep leaning against you after telling you all sorts of stories about his extensive mask collection.
(You don’t know wether you want to cry, scream or laugh, Mask was so, so young. It breaks your heart, just a little.
Really, the deities of Hyrule must adore tragedies. Bastards.)
Sighing, you decide to compromise, gently keeping the Kokiri boy right where he is, fast asleep and with barely any nightmares as you hum and card your fingers through the spun gold strands, you brush your fingers through the last masks he fell asleep mid through telling the story of how he’d acquired. If you were careful surely you’d be able to reach his pack on his side so he wouldn’t worry later.
A pair of brown boots invade your vision, Warriors crouches down. You think you spot a flash of surprise on his eyes as he spots Mask napping on you, and then fond amusement of a big brother you knew he directed often towards Wind, tone low, “Well would you look at that, out like a light. It’s a rare honor for him to trust anyone like this.”
You chuckle a bit, shaking your head, “I can tell, he’s a good kid. I’ve barely met him for a day and I’d already take on an army for him.”
“Welcome to my world.”, comes Warriors dry response, though you both knew he was a hundred percent serious, his own mask quickly falling away as he gently picked up the Deku Sprout Mask to put it back in the small sprite’s pouch, hiding it’s confused, fearful sadness from your gaze (and it’s an effort, not to twitch, as your rage towards Majora gained even more kindling to burn) as the soldier handled it with the due solemnity of being one of the few Mask would allow to even touch the masks without his immediate supervision, “... I never thought I’d see him again, as...”
“I know.” Your tone was quiet, as you carefully picked your choice of words.
If there’s one thing you knew about any Link, is that they’re all really good elder brother’s and that they are too hard on themselves. Warriors specially, Mask and Wind were his everything, there wouldn’t be words that could describe how gutted he was, after confirming his suspicions with you, regretting not saying anything against Mask joining the battle field back then, loathing himself for not convincing him or Lana into letting him stay in spite of his bad feeling that as soon as the young hero of time passed through that portal he was unlikely to ever meet him again.
... You settle for something simple, instead, reaching a hand to softly pat his head, taking care not to mess his hair too much, “You did good, Wars, it’s not your fault. Mask also knows you did your best.”
He still, sighing, the mask falling away as he guides your hand to his lips, quietly thankful (really, like big brother like little brother, your wonderful, silly, caring boys. You make a point to cheerfully bat away the butterflies in your stomach, ), “... Feels hard to believe that, some times. Thank you.”
You hum, after putting the Zora mask away, Warriors takes Mask’s other side, pulls you closer and breathes.
(Just in case, he lies to himself.)
You quietly listen to his stories about his little brother, and Warriors is content.
#linked universe x reader#linked universe warriors x reader#will I ever post the original story I was gonna use for this prompt?#who knows certainly not my sleep deprived self lol#more implied than romantic if you ask me but frankly that's about what I expected when Warriors decided to show up on this prompt#man is the most charming of the Chain but you can't tell me he would know where to begin with any sort of romantic feelings#so lots of unspoken understanding happens here instead so it's up to interpretation lol#Reader: I've had Mask for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I'd murder everyone in Hyrule and then myself.#Warriors. Approving: I know this. And I love you (feeling unspecified).#The Rest of the Chain: And we support you#Is Warriors wanting to be close in reference to the Kohga prompt?#Does he just want Mask and Reader close because he is smart enough to infer what happens to him#Does he just want them there because like all Links he has several abandonment issues?#Who knows! I just know that he is rife with trauma tokens so you all can spin the wheel and decide#Mask is probably Warriors biggest regret and I am going to shake people about it if not stopped#You can't tell me that he wouldn't have wanted to take him in once he learned he was an orphan traveling all alone with his pony in the WoA#All Links are big sibling coded just on different wavelengths#The WoA was just Wars accidentally picking up several feral strays while a war happened in the back#ex Mask Wind Tetra Skull Kid and Linkle#summer writes linktober 2023#summer writes
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sleepy-moron · 11 months
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Super messy kingdom hearts feelings
Riku is genuinely one of my favorite characters in any piece of media full stop, and it’s really hard for most people to understand why I love him so much. To a lot of people who only really played kh 1 and 2, Riku is just a kind of generic rival character, and for a lot of fans of the whole series he’s one of the best characters in the franchise but nothing particularly special in the grand scheme of all media ever.
I think understanding that Riku is deeply in love with Sora is essential to understanding what makes Riku such a wonderful character. There is so much more to him as a character, but his primary motivation has always been deeply intertwined with his love for Sora, and that’s not something you can ignore.
Riku speaks to a very specific experience that most people probably have not had, but if you do relate to it he becomes so special and important. So I’ve got to get a bit personal here to properly articulate what I mean.
When I was younger, I was best friends with one of my neighbors. We had been friends for years and spent a lot of time with each other. Then, a new kid our age moved into the neighborhood, and my best friend was suddenly spending all their time with another person. I had a lot of very strong feelings about this, to the point I would feel physically sick from it all. I didn’t understand what I was feeling or why I felt it so strongly, I just knew it hurt and I hated it.
What I didn’t realize at the time was that I am very much not straight and had a massive crush on my best friend when all this was happening. I was jealous, sad, angry, guilty, and legitimately disgusted with myself and my friend. Our friendship was never really the same after that. On top of all this I was also dealing with undiagnosed mental illness as a kid, so I was basically just an emotional wreck pretending everything was normal for a few years.
I also watched my dad and brother play a lot of kingdom hearts as a young kid. I didn’t really understand the games but I was entranced by them despite this. Flash forward quite a few years to right before kh3 came out, and I decided to start watching people play through all the games so I could actually understand what the story was. I had by this point mostly finished having a sexuality crisis and was starting to deal with the unaddressed feelings I still kept locked up.
And then I got to see Riku in all his messy emotional gay coded glory, and it just resonated with me in a way I didn’t know I wanted or needed. Watching this kid feel all these messy and ugly things that he couldn’t really understand and lashing out because of it, to get to see him atone for his mistakes and begin the long journey to not only forgive himself but also accept himself and all the things he felt, it was just so emotionally significant for me. I had never really thought about what it would be like to see this part of my life reflected by a character, but once I had it I was just overwhelmed with how strongly I connected to the Mickey Mouse anime games.
I finally had the time to watch the 6 hour Riku is gay and why it matters video the other day, and it emotionally destroyed me all over again. I don’t think I’ll ever really stop being emotional about Riku, sometimes you just consume a piece of media at the right time and it just stays with you forever. That’s really why he’s so special to me, I happened to get to fully see his character at the right time for him to be so important to me in a way very few characters are.
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blackroseguzzi · 1 year
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FATE PART 3
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Summery: Colin is reeling from your reunion and drinks his feelings. When he finds Mare at the bar he finally confesses your connection between the two of you.
Warnings: Colin being so cute when he’s drunk that it hurts.
We walked quickly and quietly to his car in the parking lot. He had a nice county cruiser, and when I entered the car the familiar scent of Colin filled my nose. He wore the same cologne since that day you’d met, and suddenly the memories of our relationship flashed in my head. The first night in our shared apartment when we made love on the kitchen table, the times we would snuggle on the couch and watch movies while we each ate your favorite ice cream. I couldn’t even look at a container of his favorite chunky monkey for months after the split.
“Sorry the car’s a mess,” Colin called out as he moved some paperwork off the dashboard. “Mare isn’t exactly welcoming when it comes to sharing her office.”
 I smiled to myself, recalling my first interaction with the rough edged detective. 
“She seems real friendly,” I was totally being sarcastic and when Colin caught on he actually gave me a small smirk and my heart jumped. 
“The crime scene’s only about 5 minutes away.” Colin announced as we pulled out of the station. I knew he was only telling me this because he was reminding himself that he didn’t have to be in the car with me for long. I watched his fingers drum lightly on the steering wheel and I couldn’t help but stare at him.
“How have you been?” I managed to squeak out, I had to say it and I immediately regretted it as Colin’s eyebrows furrowed and he let out a scoff.
“You don’t get to ask me that, Y/n.” 
Fuck, he hates me.
“Can’t we be civil for this one week, Colin?” I started to fidget in my seat. This was a long 5 minutes.
“Ok, fine.” Colin sighed and glanced in my direction for a moment before back to the road. “I’ve been great- just picking up the shattered pieces of my life since you left me two weeks before our wedding. Once I finally stop replaying the whole thing in my head all day like now you shows up out of the blue almost two years later to spend a week reporting on a case I’m already having a hard time with. I’ve been great, Y/n, just fan-freaking-tastic.” Colin’s voice was low and I felt the knife drive into my gut with each word. I don’t even know why I had to open my mouth. He pulled up at the park where the rest of the police crew were huddled around. I hung my head as I heard Colin’s door open and he slipped out. I sat there for a moment and watched him walk in front of the car and raise his eyebrows at me, wondering why I wasn’t getting out of the car. I sucked in a breath before exiting the vehicle. 
“Just try not to get in anyone’s way out here, and you really shouldn’t be out here for too long so I’ll have another office give you a ride in 20 minutes.” Colin didn’t look at me as he spoke and I felt like a kicked puppy following him towards Detective Sheehan. She was watching us approach and sucked in a breath of vape before shoving it back into her coat pocket. 
“Alright Zabel, We’re here looking for the shell casings from the bullet that grazed Erin. Her finger was taken off by the bullet, or Bullets we really don’t know what’s out here” 
I pulled out my notepad and scribbled everything that mMare had spoken as information. 
I looked around at the group of cops searching the premises, and realized this was a large area for just our eyes to see. 
“Doesn’t the county have dogs for stuff like this?” I pointed out, looking between Mare and Colin. I watched Mare’s eyebrow raise and she smirked. “Exactly. I was wondering if Zabel here could call in a favor.” Mare licked her lips and watched Colin as he sighed, shaking his head.
“That’s a big favor Mare. A favor way out of budget,” Colin responded.
“It’s probably the only way you’re going to find bullets or let alone a trail leading to them.” Mare nodded at my words and Colin sighed again pulling his cell phone out of his pocket and shooting me a glare before walking away to call in the police dogs. I wrapped my coat around me tighter as Mare looked me up and down.
“High school?” Mare questioned and I looked at her with confusion.
“High school is when you and Zabel last saw each other last?” She pulled out her vape and took another hit. 
I nodded “Yeah, it was a long time ago.” 
“Mmmhmm,” Mare breathed smoke out and walked away. I decided to follow her and she told me a little more about the case- I quickly scribbled as she talked and I mentally kicked myself for not bringing my tape recorder. Around twenty minutes later after learning a lot of valuable information on the case, I saw Colin and another office walking over towards Mare and I. 
“Y/N, Officer Mavericks is going to take you back to the station now,” Colin avoided my eyes as he spoke. I didn’t blame him, honestly. I nodded and thanked Mare before heading off with Officer Mavericks. It had been a long and exhausting evening and I was honestly not sure I would be prepared for the next week.  
Later that night Mare sat at the local bar, her head hung low and a beer in her hands. She was deep in thought when a group of men came through the door hollering. Mare watched as one of them made their way to the bar. It was Zabel, and he was clearly intoxicated. Mare cursed to herself before taking a sip of beer as Colin’s eyes found her and he drunkenly started to make his way towards her. 
“MARE!” Colin’s voice filled the air. He slumped his elbows onto the bar top and smiled widely at her. Mare smirked quickly before turning back to her beer. 
“What are you doing here Zabel?” Mare questioned the drunk detective. 
“Post game with the boyzzzz,” Colin responded as he pointed over towards his group of friends. “We ah, always get together when they’re in town for thanksgiving.”
“What about you what are you doing? What’s going on?” Colin slurred.
“Trying to drink away a bad thought,” Mare spoke, toying with a bar peanut in her fingers. She looked at Colin as he drunkenly sucked in a breath and nodded.
“Let me help you,” Colin flagged down the bartender “One more for milady, I’ll do one of those and,” Colin groaned at the thought of more alcohol, but todays events was brutal and he needed to drown them away with more booze. “And a shot of Jameson.”
Mare watched the bartender pour him the shot, and she realized he was trying to drown his own thoughts just like she was.
“So uh, what’s with you and that reporter chick?” Mare asked as Colin threw back his shot.
“Oh mannn.” He felt his face fall and Mare narrowed her eyes at him as she took another swig of beer. “She’s actually my ex.” Mare’s eyes widened now. 
Colin closed his eyes and shook his head “almost ex-wife.” He laughed as though there was something funny about it. “She called it off two weeks before the wedding… But.. What are you going to do?” Mare felt empathy for the guy. She had a feeling there was more to their story, but she had no idea that it ran that deep. She felt sorry for Colin, especially that he had to be around her for the next week while she worked the case. She watched him take a swig of beer from his own bottle.
“I’m sorry Zabel, that’s um.. I’m sorry,” She really was, she couldn’t imagine how he felt seeing her today. 
“It’s okay… here’s to us,” He shot down another shot that had appeared before him and Mare watched his face twist in confusion as he pondered his thoughts. “I just don’t know what happened you know? I woke up one morning and she goes NOPE! Not in love with you anymore.” Colin’s face turned to shock as he dramatized the replay, but inside his heart was ripping to shreds all over again. He hadn’t talked about that day with anyone. “I was like Okay, let me just put my bagel down.” He sniffed and swayed a little as he told her the story. Mare’s eyes watched him, clearly he was still effected greatly by this. “I’m just feeling like I was ready to start over after two years and It’s like….it’s like Nope here she is again ready to rip my heart open again.” He rubbed his eye, trying to stop himself from getting emotional. 
“Zabel, I can’t imagine how that feels,” Mare responds but inside she does. She sees her ex husband who lives behind her house with his fiancé everyday. 
“She asked me how I was today, like ppppffft, I’m not okay! She just left me for the Washington Post- like I was a piece of trash she’d rather throw away than take with her.”
“I’m sorry Zabel, I get it when life just falls apart around you.” Mare looked to her fellow detective and smiled at him empathetically 
“I just thought I was never going to see her again,” Colin inhaled and shook his head. He was feeling really drunk, heartbroken, and defeated. 
“Well, maybe its fate,” Mare took another swing from her beer, emptying it.
“YO ZABES, SHOTS!” A man yelled over the Colin from across the bar. 
“FUCK YEEAAAHHH!” Colin yelled back in his drunken state. Mare laughed lightly egging Colin to let things go for the night and enjoy some time with his friends.
“the development of an event beyond a person's control,” Colin hiccuped and looked at Mare with hazey eyes. “That’s the definition of fate… I know that because I wrote it in my vows,” Colin snorted before hitting the bar and standing straight up and patting Mare on the back and moving through the crowd to go take shots with his friends. 
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Experimentation (part 1)
Okay! So. First fanfic I’ve written in forever, please be gentle with me. I’ve written probably far too much because I don’t know when to stop 🥴 part 2 will be posted tonight where it gets…really smutty (I’m only using the photo because he’s hot there lmao)
Christian Cage and Fem!reader get back to their hotel room after a show and discuss her fantasies
Smut (more detail below on what that entails!), some cute moments (I’d it still called fluff?)
Word count: 2044
Smut involves: mention of ass eating, cross dressing, masterbation
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Finally, after a long stretch of weeks Christian had some time off. Two weeks to be exact. After a couple hours of socialising with his co-workers you both stumbled into your hotel room ready to hit the sheets and rest up.
“You know, I do love that I can do this again,” he started, dropping his bag onto the floor with a dull thud, “but I always forget how exhausting it is.” You gave him a sympathetic smile and offered your arms for him to enter into a cuddle.
“But it is worth it, right? To be able to go out there and perform in front of your fans again?” you questioned while he settled in your embrace.
“Of course it is, I wouldn’t trade this job for the world! But…”
He shook his head with a sigh and pressed his face into your neck. You knew how much he loved his job, helping the younger guys with their journey in the industry. Irregardless, you could see how taxing it was on his body. You did everything you could to help after matches: massages, foot rubs, you even helped him in the shower just so he didn’t have to worry about reaching around and twisting his body even more than he already did that night! But it still wasn’t enough to fully lift the pressure and the physical toll it took on his body. It always seemed there was a weight on his shoulders that wouldn’t budge.
“Listen, I’m going to take a shower while I’m still kind of awake, and then we can watch some TV before bed?” he pulled away from the embrace with a gentle kiss on your shoulder.
“Sure. I’ll put the heating on so it’s nice and warm here for when you finish in there!” you gave him a squeeze of the shoulder as he flashed a sweet yet tired looking smile and a nod before making his way to the bathroom.
He had been in there for about 5 minutes before you found yourself becoming a little bit restless. Lying on the bed you realised it had been at least around 3 weeks since you had had sex with each other. As soon as that realisation hit you, it was like someone had hit a switch. Images of him that night in the ring flashed in your mind. Seeing him in his ring gear always turned you on; something about seeing him in a tight turtleneck with no sleeves really got you going. Sure, you loved seeing his bare chest and the hair on his pecs but there was just something with seeing him clothed when he got tossed around the ring. It always sucked to see him pinned but you couldn’t help but get excited about seeing him lying there in a pathetic heap. Even more so when he was covered in sweat and/or blood. Maybe it was the idea of knowing there was something beautiful underneath the sweaty clothes that only you could see? Or maybe it was the fantasy of seeing him clothed during sex?
You both had experimented with each other since you had gotten together but there was something you had been wanting to try. And even as you thought about it at that moment, your hand found its way to your underwear waistband.
One of your experiments involved having sex while you wore clothes, more specifically a mini skirt and bralette top. He, of course, was nude but you had to wear that with no underwear or bra. It was exhilarating. Seeing your boyfriend dressed appropriately for the event, with nothing on, and yourself with the complete opposite. You both loved that he could slide his hand up your warm thighs, under your skirt and not have to bypass any underwear. Instead he could reach what he wanted immediately. The same applied to your shirt. There was nothing stopping him from caressing, squeezing, feeling your bare breasts under his hand.
But it wasn’t that situation that excited you right now. It was the fantasy, the idea that the roles were switched. That he was the one wearing the mini skirt and bralette, with nothing underneath. That he was the one submitting to your touch. You gasped, rather loudly as your fingers found their way under the cloth and to your clit. While you rubbed and pinched, your mind raced away. You imagined him laying with that pathetic and desperate look on his face while you ran your hands up his fluffy legs. Lifting them up and throwing them over your shoulders as you kissed around the area he needed you most. Hearing him call out your name quietly as your hands reached his ass, squeezing the cheeks, and spreading them slightly. Far away in your mind you could hear a very faint noise from the bathroom, like the shower being switched off. But you were too deep in your fantasy to stop touching yourself to the thought of him to care about being caught.
You imagined licking the precum off the tip of his dick while your fingers slowly drifted closer to his hole, just threatening to push their way into him. But what really excited you was the idea of moving your naughty lips down there. It was something he had admitted he wanted to try but when he told you that before, you weren’t sure about going that far just yet so he dropped the subject and it hadn’t come up since. Now? You were desperate for the idea of eating his ass until his orgasm. Maybe taking it one step further by involving toys at some point. You just needed to see him submit. To hear him whine and moan while you pleasured him in every way-
“What are you doing there?”
His voice shocked you out of your trance and froze your fingers in place. He stood at the foot of the bed, towel wrapped low on his waist, arms crossed, and an amused look on his face. You felt like a deer in the headlights as you looked up at the smirk on his face. You couldn’t even remove your hand from between your legs. It’s like you were paralysed at the knowledge you had been caught touching yourself without him there to witness it from start to finish.
“Well? Care to explain why I leave my shower to find my lovely girlfriend pleasuring herself without me?” he questioned, stepping to your side of the bed on the left. With a stammer, you tried your best to explain yourself.
“Y-You were in the shower, and I..and I jus-t couldn’t he-help it. It’s been so long since we’ve had s-sex and I couldn’t help but imagine you…”
“Imagine me…what? Touching you?” he purred. His hand reached down to your stomach, slowly sliding it down to where your hand still sat from before.
“Surprisingly no. Um…I wasn’t imagining that.”
He stopped. He raised an eyebrow at you and you could tell that his mind had gone to one of his worst fears: you were thinking of someone else. It was another thing he had admitted to you when you first got together. That he was insecure about a few things, and that not looking good enough or being good enough in bed was one of those things. He had a terrible fear that the only way someone could enjoy sex with him was if they thought of someone else. Noticing his thought process, you quickly reassured him. And divulged your fantasy.
“I... I have this thing I want to try with you.” You shut your eyes, almost in fear as you began to explain what you wanted. But what were you afraid of? He was very open minded and willing to try new things, especially in the bedroom. If it would turn you on he would perform to the best of his ability if it meant seeing you cum for him. And cum hard. But maybe it was the fear of him telling you it was too far and he was not willing to try it. Nor would he let anything convince him otherwise. He hummed a noise at you to signal you to carry on talking, and as you pressed on he sat himself down on the edge of the bed next to you. He could tell you were nervous about asking him so he wanted to ensure that the situation was as comfortable as it could be. He would hate for you to feel uncomfortable in telling him any and all fantasies.
“So you know how we experimented with me wearing clothes during sex? And you were naked?” He hummed again in acknowledgement. “Well…what if we reversed the roles?” He stayed silent, waiting for you to explain what you meant.
“I want to try having sex with you in clothes and me naked-”
“Babe, please tell me you weren’t nervous about asking me to try that with you!” he chuckled, oblivious to what you were about to tell him, “of course we can do that! If you want me to keep my clothes on and you go naked you can just ask-”
“No, not just that. In the same or similar clothes to what I wore that night. I want to have sex with you wearing a mini skirt and bralette, not me. Or maybe…lingerie?”
Christian had stopped chuckling. It obviously was a lot to take in at that moment. To be told by your partner that they wanted to see you in their clothes during an intimate experience. Especially considering you were the opposite sex.
“Okay? So…you want to have sex with me wearing your clothes? Just your clothes, no makeup or anything like that?” You opened your eyes to look up at him, expecting a look of confusion and disgust at the idea. But to your surprise, he had a very soft and calm expression. Maybe even some curiosity to the idea. You bit your lip and nodded nervously as you waited for him to respond.
He sat there processing what you had told him. There was no denying he was definitely interested in the idea, he would always try something once. But it was like there was more excitement than he expected as he imagined the situation. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to find the right words. But perhaps if you looked down at the towel, you would get his verdict. There was a very noticeable bulge under the towel as his cock became harder by the second. Imagining having sex with you in your clothes was more enticing than he thought and he wondered why you guys hadn’t tried it yet.
“Do we have them with us, and are they clean?” he asked, his voice a little higher than before. Your breath hitched as he looked down to you. He was into it. He wanted to help you fulfil your fantasy!
“Oh, um…I-I think so but I’m not sure if we cleaned them after we last used them. The top might be okay but the skirt…maybe not?”
He bit his lip, feeling a little disappointed. He was definitely interested in doing it with the bralette and skirt…but lingerie? He wasn’t sure. If it was what you definitely wanted then he’d put those feelings aside to please you.
“We don’t have to do that tonight if you don’t want to!” you reassured him, “I know you won’t want to wear dirty clothes, and lingerie might be too far for the first time.” Christian always did everything he could to make you happy when it came to sex and foreplay, but you didn’t want him to feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable. Yes, you really wanted to see him wearing that. But you weren’t going to push him. You could see on his face he really wasn’t sure on going that far too fast.
“Maybe we can try something else? Would you feel comfortable if I…if I were to, um…”
Once again, you found yourself becoming nervous about asking him to try something you guys had yet to even discuss. He raised his eyebrows at you and smiled, “sure baby, what’s that?”
“I want…I want to try…giving you a rimjob.”
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joesalw · 5 months
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Reading your transition from fan to critic of Taylor is basically how I feel. I became a fan of her in 2017 right before reputation came out. I somehow missed how “hated” she was. I really didn’t pay much attention to her beforehand other than knowing her hits. Her earlier albums were not my music taste (I did listen to Red TV and loved it though, aside from a few songs I’m sure you can guess lol). And even reputation I didn’t love right away. It took me some time and then I heard All Too Well and really started appreciating her songwriting.
Since then I have really enjoyed her music, absolutely love folklore and evermore, and saw her in public but she never felt like a huge popstar with how she lived her everyday life which I really respected. Flash forward to now…I think a lot of us who became fans around 2016 are struggling the most to remain fans. The way she has acted publicly since the breakup has really turned me off. It’s giving mean, popular girl in high school. I thought if anyone would not get the ex treatment it would be Joe. While she hasn’t said much about it, other than You’re Losing Me which sounds like a very normal song to articulate problems in a long term relationship, her actions have spoken volumes. I can’t even talk about the Matty Healy thing lol I knew at that point I would look at her differently forever. Which is very dramatic but sounds fitting when we are discussing Taylor.
The way fans are treating Joe now is disgusting and spews immaturity. I really don’t know how he stays quiet. He must have a great support system. I would love to see some spiteful behavior with some PDA with someone but he’s better than I am haha While I don’t think Travis is a bad guy, I think a lot of us can see the writing on the wall that this scenario doesn’t seem to have a lot of foundation to be a long-lasting relationship. She has not healed and wants to avoid her feelings and keeps jumping into situations where she can distract herself because she thought Joe was the one. And now she’s embarrassed. So the only way she can sing these songs about her love for him on tour is if the public thinks she doesn’t care and is over it. Totally get that but come on girl we have all been there and see through it lol The sympathy for her gets older along with her. Anti Hero seemed to show that she got it but then she refuses to break that pattern. All I know is if I’ve ever seen anyone needing a therapist it is her lol
exactly!!! 👏👏👏
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virginiaisforvampires · 10 months
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Hi, V! I keep seeing fans claim "yes Armand's tampering w/ Louis' memories but Louis totally *asked* him to do it!" What do you think? IMO it depends what they retcon, but if they reveal Lestat was less abusive than Louis said, the only way to achieve that without throwing Louis under the bus is for Armand to re-write his memories without his consent. They wouldn't have to vilify Armand (he may truly believe he's helping) but if Louis consciously chose to lie abt the abuse that would suck??
Hey! 💕
Not necessarily. Louis could’ve given Armand permission to “help”, but Louis could also not know the true extent of what or how Armand is influencing. For what it’s worth, I don’t believe Louis is consciously lying about anything, including the abuse. In the book, Armand influenced Louis to turn Madeleine, and Louis had no idea that Armand had done that. Armand also put Claudia in a trance and spoke into her mind that she should die. Armand also calmed Louis in the aftermath of Claudia’s death, and Louis didn’t realize that’s what Armand had done. Remember in Episode 5 when Armand put his hand on Louis’ shoulder to make him stop triggering Daniel’s tremors? That level of mental influence does exist in the book. Louis later refers to his mental state as if being behind a veil.
In the show, Louis has told himself a version of events to deal with the trauma, which is veil #1. Armand is also telling Louis a version to help him deal with the trauma, which is veil #2. Armand’s veil is much stronger, because he’s literally able to make Louis have certain thoughts and beliefs, thereby reinforcing Louis’ veil, which removes Louis’ culpability in the falsities whether Louis consented to it or not. What is happening in Louis’ mind at this point is literally beyond his control, and I think part of him knows this hence one of the reasons why he wanted Daniel back for the second interview. He knows Daniel is good at his job.
I’ve talked about it before, but the second interview started going off the rails when Daniel pushed through the veil and exposed the fact that, not only did Lestat not die, but Louis actively saved him by making sure he was in the trunk with locks on the inside at the dump with rats to feed on. The real shock was that Louis knew all this deep down based on the flash of him wailing with Lestat in his arms. That moment is also when Armand dropped the Rashid persona and told Daniel that Louis could sometimes “act out” and that he “protects him from himself.” That aspect of their initial dynamic also exists in the book.
I think the interview will continue to completely fall off the hinges once Daniel pushes again and the full extent of Armand’s involvement in the Paris showdown is revealed. I think Louis knows certain painful parts, like he did in the book, but the stuff he actually knows is also what Armand is messing with. I also think one of the revelations will be what Armand did to Lestat on the tower, which I suspect will tie back to the abuse in Episode 5.
In the book, when Armand finally reveals that Lestat didn’t die in Paris like he’d told Louis, he was doing it trying to make Louis feel something, because he’d been a numb shell for all their years together, which is what we see from Louis in both San Fran and Dubai.
“I cannot convey to you the feeling that came over me when I heard this. Of course, Armand told me he had protected me from this knowledge, hoping that I would not undertake a long journey merely for revenge, a journey that would have caused me pain and grief at the time. But I didn’t really care. I hadn’t thought of Lestat at all the night I’d torched the theater. I’d thought of Santiago and Celeste and the others who had destroyed Claudia. Lestat, in fact, had aroused in me feelings which I hadn’t wished to confide in anyone, feelings I’d wished to forget, despite Claudia’s death. Hatred had not been one of them. But when I heard this now from Armand it was as if the veil that protected me were thin and transparent, and though it still hung between me and the world of feeling, I perceived through it Lestat, and that I wanted to see him again.”
“And when I came to Paris I thought you were powerful and beautiful and without regret, and I wanted that desperately. But you were a destroyer just as I was a destroyer, more ruthless and cunning even than I. You showed me the only thing that I could really hope to become, what depth of evil, what degree of coldness I would have to attain to end my pain. And I accepted that. And so that passion, that love you saw in me, was extinguished. And you see now simply a mirror of yourself.”
I believe that veil described by Louis in the book is going to be Armand’s influence on his memories, because it’s what Louis needed to cope, and Louis is going to remember what he truly felt for Lestat when the tale is unwoven, which I theorize will be incredibly painful for Louis to feel again, if Lestat is in the coma like I think, because Louis believes Lestat is gone. At this point, Louis is the mirror of Armand, cold and without passion to end his pain.
Louis and Armand had this schemed out, and Armand is begrudgingly going along with it. I think Louis picked Daniel specifically because he knows Daniel can get to the truth. I also think Louis is going off the script for his own unknown motivations about which Armand has no idea, which ties back to Devil’s Minion and the fact Daniel was a “gift” from Louis to Armand. One of the most telling moments was when Louis offered to finally turn Daniel, and you can see Armand was hurt. That wasn’t part of their joint plan, and neither was the final outburst from Louis. I think Louis and Armand both have separate agendas for why this interview is taking place, and Season 2 is going to completely unravel everything, including who the true love of Louis’ life is, which I think will culminate in Louis trying to kill himself after all that pain and trauma is no longer dormant in his mind, and Lestat will awaken to save him.
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starlightbelle · 5 months
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7, 12
Oooh, yay! Thanks for asking; I’m gonna have fun with this one! 😃
7. One DC death you’d like to make permanent — or alternatively, one you’d erase so it never happened?
Hmmm…tough one. I’m not usually a fan of permanent character deaths tbh. Especially with my faves. But even with other characters like…they’re someone’s fave, y’know?
I guess maybe I’d say Solomon Grundy?? Granted my only exposure to him has been in JLU but I was so…bored?? I’m not a fan of the “giant hulking characters who no speak good” trope. So I guess I’d write him out 🤷‍♀️ Sorry that’s the only thing that comes to mind rn
It’s definitely not Jason. That’s who it’s not
Although the “death by fan-vote” is kinda a crummy thing, at this point in the narrative it is kinda fascinating having him brought back. It has evolved to be synonymous with his character so I don’t know whether or not I’d erase his death from comics canon. The storytelling potential is too immense 😅
Last-minute addition:
Oh! I’d make it so that Aquababy (Artur) never dies. Killing him off is dumb and I hate it, so I’m reversing it.
12. Pick up to 7 characters to star in a Teen Titans ongoing (any era or generation you like). What tone do you envision for this series?
Okay I pondered this and I think I found a lineup I’m comfortable with:
Dick Grayson/Nightwing
Koriand’r/Starfire
Wally West/ Kid Flash
Donna Troy/ Troia
Artemis Crock/ Artemis
Jaime Reyes/ Blue Beetle
Jason Todd/ (??)😉
Dick, Kori, and Wally I knew immediately. My dream team is not complete without these three. Donna has been left out of so much for far too long, and she’s Dick’s other best friend, and I just like her character.
After that it becomes a bit dicey because I have to narrow it down to seven…
I elected to have Artemis (Crock) with her YJ-characterization. I like her in the show and she’d fill the archer role since (sorry, don’t hate me) I’m not making Roy a draft pick, lol. Plus she and Wally are great together and I like her friendship with Dick.
I’m putting Cyborg on the Justice League, so he won’t be a member of the Titans. Having Garfield without Vic feels off somehow, and having Raven without BB also feels off. I like Jaime so that could be fun, plus I liked the idea of him and Kori being on a Team together (since she showed up in his comics run recently).
My last pick…might be unexpected?
I feel like most of the run would center mostly on these six. With a side-plot-turned-main-plot tying in another antagonistic figure (Red X/Red Hood) who ends up being Jason Todd. In the end of the first arc, Jason ends up joining the Team (he maintains that he works alone, yadda yadda…but he definitely joined the team 😅)
I’ll ramble a little more under the cut. I have more thoughts but don’t want this post to be too long so I’ll abbreviate it here 😁
The tone would probably be somewhere between the Young Justice and Teen Titans cartoons. I’m a big fan of YJ’s first season especially. I also like the anime influences TT had.
Maybe something similar in tone to My Hero Academia? It can be lighthearted at times but isn’t pulling its punches when it comes to the action/storytelling aspects.
I’m giving this run the “Titans” title since I don’t envision this being a teenagers story. They’re probably mostly young adults.
Dick has been friends with Wally and Donna for a long while already. Maybe Kori at the point has been on Earth for a couple years? Artemis has been close with Dick and Wally especially for several years. Jaime is the last to join the Team (until Jason) which feeds his insecurities at times. Kori is more than eager to help him through those feelings (which is how their friendship blooms)
All-in-all, I want this to be a very close knit group. I’ve always liked the idea of Kori and Wally being friends too, and Donna is canonically one of her best friends, too.
It would probably be a largely urban setting, as only one (arguably, two?) of these characters is not native to that landscape.
I think other settings could be possible at some point, teaming up with someone from Atlantis, for example. (Part of the reason why I didn’t choose an Atlantean to begin with was I was torn between classic Garth or YJ Kaldur)
Anyway this was fun!! Thanks for asking! 😅
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