#i quit all the drugs i was addicted to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scientia-rex · 22 days

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For the most part, my approach to prescribing hormones is “sure,” but I will note that the one thing I lean HARD on patients about is smoking. If you’re transgender, and you’re on hormones, the number one thing we want to protect is your cardiovascular health. That’s frankly the number one thing I want to protect in all my patients, but anyone taking exogenous hormones is at higher baseline risk. And the best thing you can do for your heart is DON’T SMOKE. It’s a bitch to quit, and I didn’t even smoke much or long before I quit in my late teens, and I STILL didn’t enjoy quitting and had smoking dreams for years. It’s harder to quit than just about anything else up to and including crack and heroin, and that’s coming from a patient of mine who recently passed in her early 60s who’d done all of those things—for years and years—but eventually was able to quit everything except smoking. And that killed her. She developed severe COPD and eventually called to say her blood oxygen saturation was dipping into the 70s, which is incompatible with life. She was lucid enough to decline medical care, including refusing to call 911 or go to the ER. A week later, after both I and one of our outreach nurses had contacted her to ask her to please go to the ER, I got a notification that she’d been found dead. She had been so frustrated that she wasn’t a candidate for a lung transplant.

One of my oldest trans patients is in her late 50s. She’s had blood clots that went to the lungs. Repeatedly. Smoking raises that risk. Estrogen raises that risk. She’s a veteran with PTSD; of course she smoked.

These aren’t theoretical. These are humans I’ve cared for over years of their lives. I have been rooting for them—my beloved former addict, who spoke without shame about her years of homelessness and drug use in the city; my queer elders, who are slowly trading in their motorcycles for power scooters. I want everyone to live their fullest, best life.

Smoking doesn’t fit into that. Please don’t smoke. I don’t want you to die like that—not now and not later. I want you to have the future that you may not be able to see yet, but exists.

Since I moved home as an out queer, word got out, and there’s a whole apartment complex of lesbians in their 60s to their 80s who come see me—sitting next to their wives in the office, nagging about blood pressure meds, tattling about not having gotten the shingles shot they said they would. To be clear, when I was growing up in town, I knew no lesbians. Not one. I knew one gay kid in my class, which eventually turned into two. We were it. To see these women living decades with their wives and being able to squabble like any couple in my office over who was supposed to bring their home blood pressure cuff in for us to check it… it means the world to me.

#the attending dr. kristophine

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sprinklethetangerine · 3 months

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Turns out my stupid psych exam is tomorrow and I was just straight up fuckin lied to.

#at least i have more time to study now #were taking like the mental state of adolescents and adults and elderly #and also... hallucinogenic drugs #one of these things is not like the others #i think thats my favorite one honestly #for two reasons 1. its easy 2. hallucinogenic drugs.#need i say more #were mostly talking about LSD #like the effect it has on the brain the effects of being addicted etc etc #its really interesting actually #the whole like mental state of adolescents adults and elderly is like #basically adolescents: who am I? adults: i should've taken a chance when i was younger (is still quite young) elderly: im old (thru tears)#not really but... its basically it #i mean we took a few disorders that are more common in adolescents than other ages #but other than that its all pretty much what you expect

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glitchdollmemoria · 7 months

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i google how to feel less sick from cigarettes i open quora "first, stop smoking" stop being fucking patronizing. stop it. i know i shouldnt be smoking. i am fully aware of the dangers and it is not enough to stop me because addiction runs deeper than logic. just give me the home remedies and stop acting like addicts are suddenly going to stop just because you tell us drugs are bad for us, as if we havent been bombarded with that information, as if we dont carry shame from engaging in something harmful when we know the harm it causes. stop acting like addiction is a matter of moral and intellectual failure instead of a disease stemming from underlying problems that need to be addressed in order for anything to actually change. stop being patronizing and tell me what tea will make me less nauseous. this is fine to reblog but if anyone tries to fucking lecture me about my life choices im blocking you immediately

#addiction cw #smoking cw #venting #back in my fucking addict arc full speed ahead baby!!!!!!!#''wow i was able to quit weed and alcohol preeeetty fast when my schizophrenia made them too dangerous #and the withdrawal symptoms werent ever that bad so i guess im a fake addict lol so glad im better''#jumpcut to me feeling like my body is falling apart because i just HAD to have LITERALLY anything to smoke again #fuck i am in so much pain lol! this shit is so much more painful!!!!#and i am becoming addicted so much fucking faster lol!!! lmao even!!!!!!!!#i keep telling myself that if i just find the right amount to smoke at a time then itll ease the pain without making me even sicker #thats withdrawals baby!!!!!! it has beenthree fucking days and im having withdrawals #it hurts when i smoke it hurts when i dont smoke wjat even is the point #the fact that most people apparently start with 1 or 2 a week and i had to jump in with 1 or 2 a day #or idk maybe its not exactly withdrawals but some other equally shitty thing #idk. i feel like i become dependent on drugs so fucking fast and when i try to research it i feel like im the one being dramatic #like idk why i am in this much pain except maybe that im disabled and my body is at a disadvantage #idk how it all works but idk what word is more accurate than withdrawals

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chrollohearttags · 5 months

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UNDER THE INFLUENCE | e. jaeger

content + themes: our fav sluts being sluts, spit play, drunk sex, possessive eren, makeup sex if you squint, very vocal eren, he’s kinda a switch, oral sex, mentions of pregnancy/breeding, foot play, lots of praise, dirty talk, squirting, (daddy, princess, baby used) overstimulation..I mean, the ask says it all…there’s so much more though.

📝: shoutouts to you, anon. 🤞🏾🤍 (couldn’t find this in my inbox but I surely screenshotted it a while ago and decided to circle back!). Consider this my consolation for putting y’all through it. 😁

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰──── ───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰────

addiction. A word with negative connotations almost every time it was uttered. A word that signified the need, the craving and desire for one thing..for some, it was drugs. For others, it was alcohol and for EJ? It was you… “Mmph!—okayyy, Eren! Baby, please…at least let us get through the door.”

“Nah…need you so bad right now. ‘Don’t know what to do..” although, he wouldn’t exactly consider it a bad thing! After all, you drew him in and he never wanted you to release the grip that was your love. But just as it was with any vice, when someone faces withdrawals, their next hit was going to be the best one. And for Eren, he was determined to get his fill! Making your way back to the hotel room where you had been residing during you guys’ stay in Los Angeles. It wasn’t a city that either of you visited often but you had gotten quite the opportunity to work with a large brand and wasn’t about to turn it down for anything. Of course, your doting husband was right by your side. Which came as a surprise to those who were on social media, feeding into the never ending rumor mill that swore you guys were splitting up. Allegations of cheating, fighting…it had caused quite the rift between you two but now, he was planning to rectify any mistakes or confusion..

“C’mon, mama..don’t hold it from me right now. Lemme eat that pussy.” Pleading in a whiny huff, he’d steady you against the wall, hands scouring your frame as he peeled those articles of clothing away from your body. Sliding that silk dress down far enough to expose your perfect tits. His lips, fresh with the scent of liquor still on them. A result of the copious amounts he had been drinking all night. Once your appearance was over, a lively after party was hosted at a nightclub and you both indulged in the amenities offered..him a lot more than you! Hennessy, Ace of Spades and vodka, he had been mixing it all and with that combination coursing his veins, he was much more lecherous than usual. He’d suckle on those erect nipples, sloppily lapping at those brown buds as he groped your breasts. Meanwhile, he was rolling the hem of your dress up and propping one of those toned legs on his shoulder. He was ravenous..craving you with all he had and was going to show you just how much! “Take it!..yes, baby—“ a finger slid between your teeth as you observed him sinking to his knees and spreading you open. “Imma fuck the shit ‘out you, I swear..” That heat was slathered in glistening slick; only partially covered by that lacy garment. He didn’t even bother to remove them when he began his rapid ascent into your juicy cunt. “You can have all this dick…just lemme taste you first, baby..” Slurping loudly with that swollen clit puckered between his lips. Nose brushing against your covered mound; folds making contact with his tongue, especially when your fingers were coiled around his thick, dark locks. Grinding your slit against his face. And he’d devour it..in his drunken haze, Eren smacked, sucked and licked at your sex vigorously. Not worried about the mess trickling down to his chin or diamond chain. Even when you shook violently from your first orgasm. He wanted all that you had..

“Put that shit in my face, mama. Use me..you deserve it.” Continuing his feasting assault. He was enjoying touching, kissing and peppering your most sensitive areas with affection. “Y’know how much I missed you? Missed kissing on this pretty pussy…” He couldn’t help himself, truly. Watching you strut about in that dress, dance and shake your ass with a drink in hand…it drove him crazy so when he got behind closed doors, you were all his. So much so, he’d become as freaky and fluid with you as he desired…. “Matter of fact…spit in my fucking mouth. Lemme taste that shit.” Lobbing a long string down to his lips where he’d graciously swallow and continue devouring you. Squeezing at your breasts, (y/n) rolled your hips and rode his face with all you had. “Oh God, it feels so good!—eating this shit so good, baby..” He’d slap and spank your ass, squeezing those plump cheeks..getting more than his fill of his beautiful wife. In a moment of haste, he’d rise from his knees and cradle you in one fell swoop. Sweeping you from your feet to carry you over to the bed, where he’d toss you to finish stripping you from your clothes and eventually, doing the same of his own.

“Eren…”

“Yeah, princess? Tell me what you need..tell me everything you want..”

huffing as he tore off his shirt and unbuckled his pants..whilst he did so, he’d watch you spread your legs slightly; revealing that line of slick he had drawn up. He couldn’t wait to sink his cock in between those fat pussy lips..feel that tight warmth once again and reclaim your body as his own. Whilst he’d do so, you were rubbing and massaging your clit; curling your legs up in the air..

“..Need you to fuck me..want that dick so bad…”

whilst listening to your demands, he’d stroke himself from the base to the tip, getting his already stiff hard on even more erect. Chewing at his lower lip as he watched you toy with that plump cunt. It looked so good, he put in his mind right then and there that he may never pull out. You were going to be stuffed full of his cum.

“Then open them legs, baby..hold ‘em open..” traipsing straight up to you; placing a knee in the center of the bed as you spread yourself to his desire. That slit was overflowing with arousal and waiting for him to sink his cock in between those walls. You were already pulsating, recollecting the last time he had truly made love to you. With his entire being…fucking you slowly and relentlessly until you screamed out his name. Clawing your nails into his back until sharp red marks were left and every last droplet of his nut was housed inside of you after emptying those giant balls of his. You needed it and he craved you all the same. So without another moment of hesitation, after tapping himself against you..he’d glide right in.

“Oh my—fuuuck, baby. You feel so good. That pussy’s so tight..”

howling out as if it were the first time all over again. Regardless of how many times he took claim of you, the ever so familiar clutch and grip of your hole remained. Almost as if it were perfectly designed for him. He didn’t waste another second in trying to adjust or acclimate but rather, feeding you rhythmic, fluid strokes. Clawing a hand through his chocolate locks, Eren honed in on you and ensured that you felt every single thrust. “..goddamn…look at that shit. She’s creaming on me…you missed me too, baby? You missed daddy?” Cooing to both you and your needy cunt..referring to the milky sheath dripping all down shaft and balls. “Yes, daddy! Fuck!…I missed you so much. Missed the way you fucked me…” Although he was still gaining his stride, it took no time for your bodies to become reconnected. Housing him like that of a glove after each stroke. Regardless of his lack of sobriety, he was love drunk on you any day of the week and that would never change. With your quivering legs resting on his shoulders, he’d grab and position your foot to the center of his chest and kept a hold onto it. Suddenly, his lips would make home on the instep and ankle, ravaging it with soft and tender kisses. By then, his pace had begun to speed up and his opposite hand was circulating near your clit; massaging the sensitive bud with his thumb pad. Once he heard your response, he’d started to throb inside of you, loving how desperate you were for him..time and distance regardless.

“I know, princess…I’m so sorry I was away from you..” just then, you’d feel the sensation of your white painted toes gliding in and out of his mouth. Suckling and licking on them as faint growls arose from his throat. He was like a man unhinged, needing and craving you carnally. “That’s okay..because I swear imma make it up to you…” vowing through heavy pants as the feeling of you wrapped around his member had begun to take its toll. “Imma make you come until you can’t anymore. I’m yours..all night. Use me to get that nut. As many as you want..” That fat mushroom tip had swollen to its capacity..seeping precum as it pecked the inner corner of your cervix. Because of it, you had begun to emit splashes of squirt. “Fuuuck yes! Right there…right there, you’re stretching this fucking pussy, baby.” He’d slow down as not too catch them all at once because he wanted to take his time enjoying the onslaught of it. You had never heard him so vocal and primal, taking his time to ensure that your body was well and satisfied. Still thrashing around inside of you, Eren left one final kiss on your foot before bending those legs back behind your head; folding you into that of a quintessential pretzel shape. Either way, each movement of his thick cock was visible..down to the bulge in the lower part of your belly.

“..Nngh! ‘S too much, daddy! Need you take some out..”

whimpering for him with your fingers pawing at his abs, tapping because not even he realized how deep he was in it. Buried to the base with balls smacking your asshole. The bed was rattling around and the headboard slamming against the walls of the suite. Luckily, you had no guests nearby..otherwise, they were in for an earful. But that was neither of your concern. Even so, he couldn’t grant your request until you did something in return for him. Halting, he’d allow that dick to rest idly inside of you as he shoved his fingers into your mouth, working them in and out. “You gone squirt for me, mama? Nut all over this dick?” And naturally, he’d received a prompt nod back. He seemed satisfied with your answer so he’d slowly ease that throbbing cock out; a stream of his cum absentmindedly spraying across your torso and as promised, you’d spray his entire abdomen and cock up with those sweet, warm juices. He was pleased with the little display of waterworks, regardless of your whimpers. “There we go…good girl.” Praising you as you pushed out more of that nectar. Your legs were left in a trembling mess but he gave you no time to recover..

“Save some f’r me..” chuckling as he lowered his head and lapped up every drop of it, even latching into your clit despite the sensitivity. He was insatiable and hungrier for you, now more than ever! With your entire body left in shambles, he’d work his way back up from your thighs to your neck with that trailing tongue..wrapping a hand around your throat as he whispered into your ear. “I love you, fuck I swear..I love you so much. Don’t ever forget that..” whilst doing so..lingering on his every word, he’d ease himself back inside and resume his movements. Each one felt so much better than the last and you were hooked, on his every word and embrace. “I love you too, ‘Ren! I love you too..please, don’t stop..” He truly meant it and you never doubted for a second, even if that liquor was making the feelings more intense. He was yours and nothing could keep you two apart ever again. Peppering your temple with kisses, he’d persist and pound your core until you were leaking yet again. Almost without missing a beat, he’d spout a small loud into your womb and continued going..

“Don’t worry, princess. I’m not going nowhere…I’m right here wit’ you. You opening up so good f’r me…gonna make me give you all this nut..you want it? Want me to get you pregnant tonight?”

questioning in a high pitched coo as he were reaching his second peak so soon. Running on what seemed to be fumes but he had far more in the tank. You were throbbing; smiling with a fucked out expression on your face at the thought of him breeding you. Whatever he wanted to do…you were more than happy to go along with. As long as he kept making love to you like this.

“Please..come in me. Come in this pussy…it’s yours, always been yours..”

Glaring into his eye and encouraging that cum out of him. Low and behold, it didn’t take long before that he’d halt yet again and release not only a loud, ear shattering moan but a warm load as well. Right in the depth of your womb. Your nails dragged into his back, signifying just how good he was making you feel. But this was only the beginning of your drunken..steamy stupor. The best was yet to come!..

“Fuck..need you to take more of that, baby..need you to empty me.”

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mellowwillowy · 3 months

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Yan! Mafia Ringleader x GN Reader

What? I'm sick of these classic Mafia husbands trope yet we all know damn well that part of us is digging real deep into it. So allow me to hand you one of my Mafia OCs.

One of the nation's biggest threats has yet to be your lover, wagging his imaginary tail as he rested his face on your lap. We are so desensitized to how immoral a mafia is due to the romanticization of it to the point you just straight up ignore all his crimes!

Because of his work, the two of you can't really have a private date somewhere out there. Sure the bodyguards are not in sight but you know better than to think that they are not lurking around to keep you both safe from his rivals.

"Won't you gimme a smooch'aroo?" "... In front of your men?" "*Pouts* Pretty please?"

You love it when he throws all cold facades away and shifts himself into a touch-starved puppy! Who would have known this guy just sent one of his enemies their men's heads as a lingering threat to not exert themselves~

While your lover is not involved in the human trafficking side, it doesn't justify his actions for being the largest drug dealer in this nation. Whatever type you are looking for, junkies, he has it all stored for you, with a price of course.

But if you are a junkie reader then he'd be quite worried. You see, he may be dealing drugs but that doesn't mean he's doing drugs. He likes nicotine but would rather not indulge himself in yet another addiction okay? And that goes the same way to you! Please stop it.

And may I tell you that Kaspar enjoys ranting to you about how his day(s) has been, how he wants you to comfort him as you praise him for surviving yet another day? Empty plates are not filled with him just sitting around and he has to fight every day to not remind himself of the old days?

"Oh yes, have my beloved eaten? You are not going through another silly diet, right? Trust me, food is meant to be enjoyed and not over-calculated!"

There are also times he'd rant non-stop about this certain lawyer that he's working with. Of how one of the nation's biggest threats, has been reduced into an errand boy for his spouse! Can you believe that, babe?

Overall Rating? 9/10. Where did the 1 one go to? Your dead friend that insulted you and his punishments. Ehe.

Look, he has a problem with people who dare to look down on him and you, he has grown up in a rather unfortunate background in which he fights teeth and nails to break free so how DARE someone patronize him or you?

Yeah, it sounds romantic but not so cute when it's your literal bestie. He spares no mercy in how he deals with them too, the only mercy he's offering is one chance and nothing more.

Another dark side of him would be his... punishment. Ehe. Due to his upbringing as a ringleader, he is used to disciplining his men, rough. Sure he doesn't give you the same punishment as he does to his men but that doesn't mean it saves you from how unpleasant it is.

The worst punishment that wrenches his heart would be making you skip breakfast, lunch, and dinner! He doesn't have the heart to but he has to! (Honestly, in your opinion, there is literally worse punishment than this, not gonna name it.)

Yeah he is a Beelzebub at heart (Gluttony)

#Kaspar the Drug Lord #LIfE Project #Yandere x Reader #x GN Reader #Yandere Imagines #Yandere Headcanons #Yandere Scenarios

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