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#i realized i hated the last one and i liked this better so
ponderingmoonlight · 2 days
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Gojo falls ill and reader does finishes his missions and her own missions as well do Gojo doesn't have a pile of work waiting for him once he gets better. Gojo gets better. And finds out. Hehehehe Lobe u babes
omg I love this, let's do it hehe
Reader finishing Gojo's missions when he falls sick and he finds out
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Pairing: Gojo x wife!reader
Word Count: 2,3k
Synopsis: When your husband falls sick, you don't think twice about completing all of his tasks in order for him to not be stressed - even if it means multiple sleepless nights for youself. Little did you know that your husband will find out about it and thank you in his own way...
Warnings: pure fluff over fluff so enjoy, Gojo basically being THE husband for y'all, not proofread because it's already darn late here and I'm way too tired
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„Oh come on, don’t tell me the honoured one caught a cold”, you playfully tease your beloved husband.
He’s definitely ill, there’s no doubt in that. The way his forehead is covered in sweat, his unusual pale face paired with his heavy breathing. Let alone the sight of his red and runny nose.
You never thought this is possible. After all, Satoru is one of the few people who are able to use revered technique. Isn’t he able to heal himself, to prevent his body from falling sick?
“Looks like I overdid it those last weeks. My body is catching up on my apparently”, he replies weakly along with a nasty sounding cough.
You know all too well these last weeks were like a trip to hell and back for him. This is actually the first time you saw your husband after one whole week of him running from mission to mission and coming home into bad past after midnight. Being two special grade sorcerers, it is your responsibility to prevent the worst things from happening. Especially during summer, the number of curses triples. And that paired with the stinging fact that jujutsu sorcerers die like flies each and every day…
It’s no wonder his body took a toll on him.
“You’ll stay here for the rest of the week, babe”, you instruct him gently while pulling a blanket up his chest.
“Nah, no chance. I’ll have a pile of work when I get back and-AH.”
It’s frightening, the way he almost chokes while coughing so roughly that it vibrates through your whole body. This doesn’t sound good at all. To be exact, you’ve never seen your husband like this despite the fact that you’ve been together for multiple years by now. If he’s feeling this miserable, it’s definitely time for a break.
“Don’t worry about that. I hold the position while you’re gone.”
Little did he know you meant that.
-a week later-
“It’s far past midnight. Why are you still up, (y/n)?”
His hoarse voice rips you out of your microsleep immediately, lids so heavy they feel like closing by themselves if you don’t pay close attention.
“Oh, just work.”
No, it’s not just work. Apart from the daily drama you have to endure, you made it your mission to complete each and every task your husband would face as soon as he comes back. You know all too well he’ll throw himself fully into work again, not thinking about his own health a single second. And to prevent that, you decided to finish his missions as well, to teach his students, to do anything in your power to prevent Satoru from a pile of work.
Including swollen eyelids, constant grumpy mood, no effort to eat and your shoulders hanging down onto the ground.
You hate to admit it, but you are exhausted. You never realized how much work your husband does during the day. Must be easier for him, though. Teleportation sure sounds nice at the moment…
“I’m worried about you, babe. Are the elders bombarding you with work again? Maybe I need to have a serious talk again-“
“No, don’t think too much about it. I’m just hanging on a bit, that’s it”, you lie.
Oh, Satoru knows it is. After all, you’re talking about yourself. You, so disciplined that you’d never leave work unattended. No, it’s absolutely impossible that you’re “hanging on a bit”. But what else is it? The dark circles underneath your eyes look like valleys in the soft light of a lamp, tired eyes failing to focus on the paperwork in front of you. Usually, this is what you’re doing straight in the morning when he’s still asleep. What keeps you so busy these last days? He has to find out, he-
He almost chokes on himself again, earning a concerned side eye from you. It’s been a week and he’s still sick to the brim. Worry lines decorate your face, palm gently resting against his scorching hot forehead.
“Off to bed with you.”
“Don’t stay up too long, okay? All you seem to do is work these last days”, your husband replies worried himself.
You sigh to yourself. That’s because you do. But leaving your husband to a pile of work after he returns to Jujutsu High only to get sick again? You grab the pen in your hand tighter, force your eyes to fully open. Only a few more days and you’ll be done. After all, you’re doing this for him, right?
Satoru is definitely worth the sleepless nights.
-a few days after-
“Turns out I’m fully back at normal again, babe!”, your husband announces proudly.
You blink against the harsh light of the merciless sun, eyes dry like sand. Only a few hours ago, you returned from a village Satoru was supposed to inspect. Well, minutes turned into hours when a special grade curse appeared out of no where and made your life living hell. The sun already began to rise when you carried yourself back into bed.
But still, you can’t help but smile at him. These last days were rough for him. Him, the strongest, passed out because of a cold. He wasn’t himself all this time, weak body bound into bed with his limbs aching.
“So glad to here that”, you mumble while pressing a gentle kiss onto his lips.
“Sleep in for a while, you look exhausted (y/n). I know you just came back a few hours ago and don’t you dare to lie at me.”
Your eyes widen in an instant, cheeks blushing ever so slightly. You were so careful about leaving and returning, his even and long breaths not giving a single hint that he might be awake.
“I’m heading to Jujutsu High, bet work piled up pretty bad. Wish me good luck and have a good rest princess, I’ll kick their asses if they try to call you!”
With one last loving glance at you, he’s gone. And you can’t help but pass out immediately.
“Guess who’s back to save the day!”, Satoru announces proudly into the room filled with his students and Yaga Masamichi who looks at him with the same disinterest as usual.
“You? Didn’t even know you even exist anymore”, Nobara mumbles while filing down her nails.
“How are you? (y/n) told us you were sick”, Yuji interjects.
“I’m completely back to normal!”
“What a shame”, Megumi mumbles under his breath.
“Sooo, what side of earth do I have to save today? I’m sure a lot of work piled up while I was gone. After all, I’m the strongest.”
Satoru stretches himself playfully, waiting for the director to tell him about all different kinds of missions, curses and teachings he has to deal with these next few days. But instead, he just shrugs his shoulders.
“What? Got nothing to say? Okay, let me guess, what about that special grade curse in the village-“
“Done”, Yaga Masamichi replies dryly.
“The combat training with the first year-“
“Done.”
“Any curses that appeared in Tokyo?”
“Done.”
“Taking care of-“
“Done.”
This can’t be true, the man in front of him has to joke. Apart from you, Satoru is the only special grade sorcerer here at Jujutsu High. No one would ever be able to fulfil some of those missions, let alone teach his students just like that. Not even the director himself is capable of dealing with that special grade curse he was talking about just before Satoru got sick. But who…?
“Didn’t your wife tell you she already managed all those things?”
Oh, he was so stupid that it hurts. All these nights he caught you almost falling asleep on your desk, the multiple times you sneaked out of bed far past midnight, the dark circles under your eyes. All this time, you weren’t only busy with your own missions. No, you actually fulfilled all of his work for him as well.
“Just the amount of work I have to do when I come back. Urgh, being sick sucks.”
“Don’t worry, love. I’m sure you’ll be fine.
Yeah, he sure as hell is. But only because you decided to make your own life living hell for two weeks straight.
“Please don’t tell me (y/n) did all of my stuff while I was gone.”
“I’ll never understand how a kind-hearted woman like her ended up with you. She didn’t even stop when I told her to and somehow managed to get information about the missions I prepared for your sick ass”, the director replies dryly.
“Call her in right now.”
Words aren’t enough to thank you for this. No, you deserve way more than that, way more than his mouth could ever give you.
“And let her leave again in about an hour.”
-an hour later-
“Again, sorry for calling you in, (y/n). Now get back home, you’re free tomorrow.”
“Thank you”, is all you’re able to reply, wobbly feet carrying you back into your car and onto the road.
You sigh to yourself. Well, you definitely didn’t expect the director to call you this early when you just returned from an exhausting mission. But who are you to say no to him? After all, it’s your job to do this, it’s your job to protect the innocent.
But…Is it also your job to answer strange questions from your students in the morning?
“Come on, use your brain! You know what the director said!”, Nobara hisses through gritted teeth, the trio sticking their heads together after you were forced to drop your haircare routine to Nobara.
“Ehm...so…well…”
“If you don’t have any further questions, I’ll go-“
“Yes! I have a question!”, Yuji screams so loudly that his voice echoes through your tired brain.
“What is it, Yuji?”, you mutter with your eyes closed.
“How exactly are babies made, (y/n)-san?”
“You’re an idiot…”, Megumi grumbles.
“Really? This is all you have left in your pea-sized brain?”
“What? You just told me to ask her something and that’s what I came up with!”, Yuji defends himself.
“Yeah, but that ‘something’ definitely didn’t include THAT!”
It’s almost as if they were forced to ask you dumb questions. You’ll definitely have a talk with your husband about their strange behaviour when you caught up on sleep. But before that…
You open the door with a swift motion.
Your heart skips a beat, eyes widen.
The usual so modern and clean living-room is now covered in rose pedals and filled with the fresh scent of sakura leaves, your couch unfolded and covered in the most fluffy blankets, pillows and stuffed animals you’re ever seen. And there he sits.
He, your beloved husband, holding up your bathrobe oh so inviting.
“What’s going on here?”, you breathe out.
Suddenly, all the exhaustion you felt earlier disappeared into thin air. Did he really do all of this for you? The candles flickering, the blankets, the strawberries covered in chocolate waiting on the table, him wearing that black t-shirt you love so much.
“Guess what, I found out what you did. Did you really think you’ll get away with stealing my work in silence?”, he teases, love dripping from each and every word he says.
“It was nothing”, you try to brush him off.
But instead, he gets up and grabs your hand in order to guide you into the dim bathroom that is only lightened by a few candles. Again, the lovely smell of sakura leaves radiates from the bathtub filled with bubbles and hot steam. Just the thought of letting yourself sink into that warm water, to finally release the tension in your sore muscles-
Before you’re even able to comprehend what’s happening, Satoru took off your clothes and lifts you off the ground with ease. Your body doesn’t dare to fight back, too weak from all the missions you completed these last days. Just the tip of your toe, relaxing in the water for a few minutes before returning to Jujutsu High…
“Nothing, huh? So you mean doing the stuff I need a month for in two weeks besides your own missions is nothing? Words can’t express how thankful I am to have such a sweet, caring and steaming hot wife”, he whispers against your ear, his fingers starting to massage your back oh so skilled.
You allow yourself to sink into his touch, to rest your eyes for a few minutes. Well, there is no denying in the fact that this was a little too much for you. All the fighting, the paper work, the heart and soul you poured in each and every work.
And then there’s him. Satoru, your beloved husband, who massages your back with his skilled fingers. How lucky you are to call him your husband, that he decided to spend the rest of his life with you. Even though he scolded you ever so slightly for managing his pile of work, you know he’d do the same for you in a heartbeat. What a treasure, how glad you are to know him, how wonderful he is…
“(y/n)?”, Satoru purrs against your ear.
You don’t response, chest rising and falling slow and steady. He can’t help but smile to himself, admiring he beauty of your finally resting face. Carefully, he lifts you out of the bathtub and covers your body in the fluffy bathrobe you love so much. You definitely deserve some rest for all the work you did these last days.
He can’t help but gently caress your cheek, making sure you’re completely tucked you underneath your favourite blanket.
“What a lucky man I am”, he mutters to himself while outlining your parted lips.
“To call someone so wonderful my wife…”
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(this took me forever so if I tagged u be so kind and leave a like/comment/reblog lol)
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moneymartin · 2 days
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・❥・- one more?
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summary: kate comes home tired and needy :( part two to this fic. build up drabble to part three
warnings: none! fluff cause its kate :3 this is kinda shorter than the last one soz. again, every divider is a skip. most are constant cuz im lazy. didn’t know how to end oops!!!
rpf dont read it if ur uncomfy thx
a/n: all yjs reqs r still itw soooo they’ll be out soon poopies 🙄 also my single part drabble for kate is lowk marinating in my drafts and i don’t have the motivation to finish it…
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its been 5 months since you and kate finally ended up together. pretty long, right? but you two never really got the hang of this thing, especially after remembering how long those feelings between you two had been brewing up for. it was still hard for you to show up to her games and practice due to soccer season, and the second it ended, you showed up to nearly every single one of them.
“i really can’t come this time, baby, i told you!” you grumble while kate drags you across the dorm. they had their practice game at carver today but you couldn’t make it, which made kate upset. “dilanni is gonna kill me if i don’t show up.” your soccer team needed to show up together for this fundraiser, and it was during the offseason. fucking lame. you hated letting her down all the time but some things like this just needed to be done.
kate’s fingers grip at your sweater sleeve, her eyes soft, and lips slightly pouting. “can you please just say you feel sick!? you’ll finish quicker than i will and it’s not like they won’t let you in.” she begs and tugs a little at it. her height makes you a little overwhelmed but she’s slightly bent at the knees and trying to make herself seem smaller than she really is. “kate, its just practice. its not like its the final fours yet.” you sigh and make her stand up straight. your eyes dart to hers and you bring your hands up to cup her face. the way she leans into your touch makes your face flush up like never before.
“yeah, but you always show out! i know we’re still trying to keep this on the down low still but i love pointing at you in the crowd before i make a shot during our practices.” she complains, trying to pull her head away from your hands but you keep her in place like a vice. your thumb brushes up against her face and she sighs under her breath. all those shots that she makes have all been for you ever since. and you didn’t even know that. everything she did on the court was meant for you. “i’ll make a deal with you, okay?” your words make her feel a little bit better and she nods ecstatically.
“when you get back we can do whateverrrr you want to make you feel better about me not showing up. does that sound good?” you propose, the idea crossing your mind after you realize that she just wants to spend that time with you while her teammates try to piece together this big puzzle. none of them know other than caitlin, and they’re completely unaware of you and kate’s relationship. “yes! okay, deal! deal deal deal…!” she blurts out and smiles stupidly, leaning her head towards you again as a sign that she wants a kiss.
you give it and let go of her face, wrapping your arms around her waist quickly and pressing another big kiss to her cheek. “don’t work yourself too hard out there.” you breathe out and pat her back before letting go of it. “this fundraiser should only be an hour, trust me.” kate just shrugs and smiles again, less big but you still know that she’s pretty happy at your little proposition for when she gets back. the moment you walk out of that door, her face drops and she rubs awkwardly at the back of her neck. she’s alone now, and doesn’t know what to do. you’ve been with her for every game and every practice so she’s lost most of her motivation to go. “aw, dang it..”
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after your little fundraiser, you come home exhausted and dreary when you realize kate is gone too. you two are exactly the same person, lost without one another. it’s cute but sometimes it’s hard. this whole relationship thing is such a different concept and it makes your head hurt. the lock clicks on the door and you dig through your closet, finding a pair of pjs and some small shirt kate likes seeing you wear for ‘some reason’. which is what she says every time you ask.
a quick change and your casual clothes scatter across the floor before you basically face plant into the pillows. a warm feeling fills up your body while you fall asleep, a feeling that seems different still without kate. you two always sleep and take naps together so this is another thing you have to get yourself used to.
the stupid fundraiser ran longer than it should have. at least another 30-45 minutes extra and you weren’t very prepared for it. kids were all over the place too and you were somewhat on babysitting duty? according to your teammates. you stood with all the kids for at least an hour and the questions they asked you were probably the stupidest things ever.
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the sound of the door opening is what wakes you up, fingers instinctively rubbing your eyes and sitting up. you’re met with the sight of kate rummaging sluggishly through her backpack and taking out clothes. she mumbles out a small ‘hi’ and yawns, walking into the bathroom. the sound of the shower hits your ears and you just lay back down, trying to keep yourself awake to fulfill that proposal you made earlier.
a few moments after the shower turns off, the bathroom door opens and your mattress shifts in weight, a few drops of water coaxing you to open up your eyes. kate is sitting on the edge of the bed and she tucks herself in, burying her face into your neck. “how was practice?” you mutter, moving her wet strands of hair to sprawl out on the bed. she grumbles into your neck instead of instantly responding. “tiring, huh?” you ask.
“extremely.” she whispers breathily and looks up at you. kate’s eyes are slightly droopy and her lips are pursed. your arm wraps itself around her back and you tilt her head up with your hand, making her look up at you as you start rubbing her temples gently. kate’s eyes are opening and closing continuously while your fingers continue to massage her head and she huffs heavily a few times.
you push kate’s head into your neck again and slide your hands onto her shoulders, patting them gently to make her fall asleep easier. she doesn’t though. instead, she hoists her head up and quickly locks her lips with yours, grabbing your waist and holding herself up with her arms. her fingers are gripping at the bedsheets tight and she’s kissing you a little bit too hard. not that you mind, of course. “mmmf.. hey?” you pant and pull away from the kiss, making eye contact with kate and realizing where she’s placed her hands.
“i’m just kissing you.” kate mumbles and doesn’t even bother waiting for you to finish catching your breath. she kisses you again, propping herself up on her elbows and grabbing your arms to wrap around her waist. “y- yeah! but like… let me get a breather at least.” you laugh quietly. you’re still trying to catch your breath and the more you try to get away, the more persistent she becomes. “c’mon. you’re just sleepy, baby. get your butt to bed and you’ll be alllll good in the morning.” you smile and push her shoulders down.
kate ends up falling onto your body and her nose brushes up against your cheek, her lips running up and down your neck as she starts kissing all over it. “one more..” she rasps out and slides her hands underneath your shirt. she starts to claw your back a few times, whining into your neck when you try to push her away. “kate, please.” you grunt and pull back, nearly falling off of the edge of the bed.
her face is the same one as earlier. her big, pretty blue eyes going soft and her lips pouting. she looks like a sad puppy and you hate it. you hate how you can’t say no to it. “just one more! this is the last one and i’ll sleep, i swear.” kate spits out and tilts her head to the side. she yawns, her eyes getting watery and now you know that it’s basically over for you. “i can’t.” you mutter. “yes, you can. it’s just one more kiss, babe. please?!”
“all you have to do is give me one, and i’ll sleep!”
“you say this all the time! you’re gonna say that you’ll ‘sleep after’ but the second my lips land on yours, you’re gonna act like an animal.”
“that’s not true.”
“oh, yeah? watch.”
you cup her cheeks and she grabs your waist gently, your lips going in for one quick one. when she feels how warm you are and how much you’re trying to really prove a point, she just helps your claim anyways. kate’s lips are against yours again, kissing hungrily.
i mean, she’s practically eating away at your face.
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rinbowaman · 1 day
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“Child of the Sea”
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A Drabble from the Mermaids Tale series, and dedicated to @hoonieshoney, my little Siren (if yk…then yk.) you did wonderful in your latest Drabble, so take this since you inspired this piece. Enjoy heedam 😈
Warnings: non con smut, dub-con, submissive reader, hesitation, cursing, unprotected smut in detail, breeding kink, baby trapping, unwanted pregnancy l, reader forced into getting pregnant, a slightly whiny Heeseung, this is based of the MT series so it may be confusing unless you’ve read the entire series (which is completed btw). Enjoy.
“Can you hear the ocean, baby?”
His voice submits you into a quivering quake of anticipation and fear. Yet there was something pleasing to the sense of danger in the arousal that forms inside, and he knows it. He creates it and makes you desire more, no matter how hard you try to fight against him.
“Tell me you can hear it.” He gently coos you as he rings his fingers and pushes back the strands of your hair aside, admiring your natural yet extraordinary features. Blessed as the descendant of Poseidon, your turquoise eyes glitter like the jewel itself, while your raving burgundy hair compliments the dark red lips. While many would initially mistake the colors of your DNA for colored contacts and hair dye, they would all drop dead upon finding out that it was all a reflection of your ancestors godly genealogy traits. “My beautiful siren. Sing for me, won’t you baby?”
You both lay facing each other. You didn’t have a choice, since he captured and held you against your will months ago, he’s forced you to sync with his schedule. Due to your recent good behavior, he clipped the chains and allowed you a certain amount of freedom in the room, even when he would be in the next one handling some business. However, no matter how much little freedom he permitted, you would never be allowed out of his grasp or sight. Rule of thumb was for you to remain within one hundred feet at all times, breaking that crucial rule resulted in you being locked away in the underground spa that he had costumed built, where the entire pool was surrounded by a smooth wall that caved the water in, similar to a well. The water came straight from the sea, and only a narrow stoop leading to the front door, escalating out of the shallow end allowed him to stand and watch you during his visits. The last time he had you locked in, forcing your transformation, he kept you as his pet and enjoyed keeping you in secrecy for nearly a whole month. The pool was deep. Below the surface, into the deeper end, the wall transition from brick stone to glass, where he could watch you from the other side in the underground chambers of a luxurious bedroom. Everytime you’d dive down and lurk to the bottom, you could see him sitting in a grand velvet chair, sipping in a glass of wine with his legs loosely crossed as he watched you in awe. How beautiful and magical did you look with your mermaid tail flowing behind.
Sometimes, he’d come up to the glass and press his palm flat against it, beckoning you to come up and flush your own with his. You knew better than to not come up when you’d hear the tapping of his fingers; disobeying him led to other punishments that were far too brutal. So even as much as you hated being treated as his little guppie in the wide aquarium, you had to pick your battles wisely.
All the more reason why you displayed your good girl behavior. You didn’t really realize that it was all part of his tactic in training you to become obedient, and respect the rules he set forth, all so he can keep you isolated and only where he can have you. Initially you behaved as part of a ploy to plot your escape, but day after day you found yourself becoming complacent, never finding the right moment to strike. You’ve attempted to use the Sirens Edge, yet he was far more immune to it than you expected. All thanks to his Adam traits mixed with the Siren DNA from the early ancestors of the clan. You hated to admit it, and still haven’t bend enough to fully do so, but little by little, you’ve come to accept your fate right this man in knowing that you’ll never escape and he’ll always keep you. The worst part? Someday you were going to be forced to bear him sons…all of which will continue the long pure lines of tradition in enhancing the longevity of the Clan of Adam.
Still, despite harboring such hatred and disgust towards him, his gentler and loving moments somewhat appealed to you. That was, after all, the whole reason why you were here. The reason why he caught and kept you. Punishing and training you…it was all because he loved you. Too much…
You hum a tune as he lays closely, his nose touching yours. He joins in as he recognizes the tune of your favorite song and incorporates the lyrics. “Sing either me baby.” Compelled to obey, you softly sing the lyrics. The mesh of both your voices combine a beautiful and harmonious sound that would put the entire world into a state of hypnotic slavery, for the women would abide by his demands under his serenade spell, and the men under yours.
The both of you continue to sing, and that’s when you notice his hands roaming. Please…not again.
“Keep singing.” He speaks against your skin darkly. You had to give it to him, he was devastatingly handsome and the alluring sense of his features only grew more wild as his eyes became darker and more dangerous. They nearly glowed purple, contrasting against your beautiful turquoise gems as he grips a fistful of hair on the back of your head. He pushes you flat against the bed, pressing his lips against yours. It was hard and abrasive, yet the beat of his passion weakened you. It was so contradicting how much you hated and enjoyed the feeling he made you experience.
During the kiss, he grabs on to your bicep and further pins you down, nearly digging you into the satin mattress. His free hand swipes up, riding along your inner thigh and it too, is pinned down against the sheets. He spreads you wide open, preparing you into prime position for him to plow into you, just as always.
Already half nude, he takes advantage of your full nudity as he unzips his trousers and whips out his member offensively. He was past the stage of sensuality and compassion, this was a night of lovemaking through the pure and shameful act of him fucking you into oblivion.
He was long, hard, and entirely too thick. Just looking at it reminded you of the painful sting you were subjected to during the first time, and the second, even the third. Hell, you can’t count how many times he’s taken you, all you know was that there was pain.
“Pl-please! Be gentle…your hurt me badly the last time.” You plead as you raise your hand and palm against his abdomen, gently pressing against it as he leans down and hovers above your frame. “But you ended up loving it, didn’t you?” He teases as he nibbles on your bottom lip.
You shake your head in denial, but he knew. He knew that with the pain, comes great pleasure. “N-no…” you murmured. He ignored your pitiful yelp and kisses you. Taking your hand in his, he drags it against the lean lines of his abdominal muscles and forced you to grab hold of his shaft, ensuring that every single one of your fingers are delicately wrapped around the circumference. All doing so without ever breaking the passionate kiss you enveloped you.
How cruel it was for him to make you feel it, especially since he enforced you to keep hold while he begins to plunge in. “Agh! No! No!” You moan out as the familiar sting bites you. “Shh…yes baby.”
Inch by inch, he slides in. You feel the length of his shaft growing shorter within your palm as he fills you; the strength of its form slipped away from your grasp only to be gripped by another part of you. Your inner muscles clench around his thickness, which sent your mind out of this world as you feel the form of his muscle twitch in response. You felt so good. Too good. The moment he felt your slick muscles clench, his head flings back and exposes his entire throat above you. It became the only view in your sight as you lay under him, forced to watch as he gulps out a moan and groans towards the ceiling while he goes further and further in. “Oh fuck…” he growls out as you squirm and shift, brows furrowed in to an expression of fear, worry, and pain. “Please…it’s too much…”
“Don’t worry baby…I’m going to take care of it in a second. Keep singing.” He winces his eyes shut for only a second before he lowers his head back down and stares into your eyes. “Give me many sons.”
You shake your head negatively as the remaining inch of him sinks into you. His balls kissing your skin as it mashes against your taint. “Please…too soon. I-I cant—“
“You can, and you will.” Was all he relayed before he starts his violent thrusts. Tonight, he wasn’t in the mood to make love, he was in the mood to breed…to mate. To make you carry a part of him and bring it to the world. He wanted to cum, to mix your bloodline with his. “Come on baby, turn me into a daddy. Let daddy’s dick make you into a mommy.”
You scream as he continues to fuck you into the mattress. Your hands fling around as you attempt to escape from under him, only for him to slap them away. But you were relentless, and continued to try and push him away. “Fucking hold still you little—“
He grits his words in slight annoyance as he pauses his thrusts and grabs on to your wrists, pinning them above your head as he takes his other hand and loops it around your upper thigh and pins it against your chest. Now he had more leverage to stroke his cock inside you more openly, and he did.
“Fuck…you feel even better like this.” He words out as he slams into you. The smooth length of his shaft squelches and squeezes its way in and out of you. The sound of his balls slapping into you started to work its magic and sent you into a delirious whirlwind of tingled pleasure.
“Oh my God!” You pant out as you gasp for air. He rests your thigh on his bicep to maintain the levitation of its position while his fingers creep up and gently caress your cheek. “Yeah? Fuck baby…just like that.” Through the ferocity of his act, he pants and groans out his words just as you did. While his lower half becomes more brutal, his lips and hands weee compassionate and sympathetic. There was that gentler tone of him that was lacking earlier. While he was continuously plunging in, he warmed your cheeks with the smooth swipe of his thumb as he wiped away the subtle tears that emerged from your gorgeous eyes.
“Fuck y/n—“ he pants out once more as he pauses to prop his weight on the balls of his kneecaps. Looping his arms around your kier back, he intertwined his fingers as they rest right above your derrière, elevating it off the bed, turning you into a human pendulum. he continued his unlawful movements as gravity takes effect and forces your shoulder blades to sink into the bed as he raises your pelvis higher against his abdomen. “Pleaese-please-please-please—“ you gasp out violently in sync with his thrusts, hoping he would slow down. Instead, he goes harder, faster, and deeper, digging into soft tissue as he penetrates deep into the abyss of your womb as he strikes in and out, tapping that soft spot that causes you to leak onto his shaft, permitting him to slide in and out effortlessly.
He takes a hand and moves it against the center of your chest, smoothing it all the way up against your throat, and under your chin. His thumb reaches up and makes its way into your mouth. You yell out your moans as the image of him using only one arm bridging under your rear and stabilizing your lower frame to fuck into you caused you to grow dizzy. He was strong. So strong.
The sound of skin meshing together with the sticky juices thickening as a result of the constant thrust made you gasp even more. It synchronized with the tempo of his thrusts and you could barely catch your breath. He was not far behind. With his tenacity in going deeper, the obsession of tasting the internal side of you, it was all enough to make his heart stop beating. “Y/n…my beautiful siren.” The last bit came out slightly whiny as his cock twitches violently. You could feel it.
“W-wait! Heeeeung!”
He was close, you could tell. As much as you were forced to enjoy this, and you did, the question of whether you were ready for motherhood became absolute in the sense that you weren’t ready. You can’t, not yet. Because the moment you do become pregnant with this man’s child, that means you won’t be able to escape…ever.
“Please…not-not inside!” You moan out, once again palming his lower abdominal muscles, a pitiful attempt in pushing him away. But it was no use. The second he cupped your own hand and held it in place as his thrusts increased in pace and became sloppy, the loud grunts coming from his mouth matched the momentum of his hips as he kept going in and out.
In and out.
In and…
“Heeseung stop! I can’t be a mother! Please!”
Ignoring your pleading, he takes his thrusts deeper as he shoots his cum deep inside. His head flings back once more, mouth wide open as he faces the ceiling and gulps out a growl as his hand slowly smooths over your mouth to cover your scream. “T-take it…fucking get pregnant.” He stutters as every single muscle on his body twitches while he releases his entire orgasm inside you. His eyes remained closed as he locates your tongue and feeds his fingers into your mouth, rubbing the inside of your cheek as he forces you to suck on them. You hiccup a few sobs as you look down and see him planted deep inside you, still pumping his seeds into your womb. “Y-you…you really tried this time…didn’t you?” You wailed as you quietly sobbed, fearing that he achieved his goal. “U-uh huh….” He lazily tuned out with his face still flushed with the ceiling, leaving only the view of his Adam’s Apple in sight for you to view as you watched it bob up and down when he responded.
Sure, he had never pulled out the other times, but he never railed into you as vigorously like he did tonight. Sighing out a deep breath, he finally lowers his head once more and lays on top of you, mashing his sweaty chest against your breasts. Choking out a chuckle, his fingers, coated in your saliva, trace lines along your face. Smirking, he darkly whispers against your lips…
“Now you’re never going to be able to escape from me.”
He was right. You’re never going to be able to leave, even if you had the chance to get to the sea, you won’t be able to find it within your heart to abandon the child he’s left inside you just now. From here on out, you were no longer a descendant of Poseidon…you were now a mother a part of the clan. Mother of an Adam.
Authors note: take that! 😈
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Very silly modern meetcute where Ed's a super famous but burnt out movie star doing one last stupid movie he hates so he can finally retire. And he's having a fucking exhausting day because it's one of those very melodramatic relationship study films and his entire day of filming is basically getting yelled at by another actor for being a terrible boyfriend.
And it just so happens that this scene in the film where the characters have this huge argument takes place in public, and it's in the middle of a park. Ed doesn't know, he doesn't care, he hates it even more because it's hot and bugs keep touching him.
But Stede always takes a walk through the park every day, and he basically saw the signs that were like "don't enter this area" and thought "huh I wonder who that's for :D" and kept living his life as normal.
Anyway Stede sees Ed getting yelled at in the middle of a crowd, he doesn't even know him yet but his "protect Ed" instincts kick in, and he just fuckin storms in there and probably headbutts the other guy to get him out of Ed's space and starts being like "what the fuck??? Why are you screaming at your boyfriend like that??? He deserves so much better! Stop it! Get out of my park!"
Eventually he realizes that he recognizes the guy he's giving a talking-to, because he's probably also a famous A-list actor, and then he realizes that Famous Actor Blackbeard is giving him these big amazed eyes. They elope that same weekend
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barnesafterglow · 1 day
Text
night shift
summary: your growing fame becomes too much for bucky
pairing: actor!bucky barnes x singer!reader
word count: 2k
warnings: fame au, dual pov, unreliable narrators, idk how the grammys work (clearly), angst angst angst, steve is a good friend, bucky is Going Thru It, if you think this is joe + taylor coded you're prob right, directly inspired by night shift by lucy dacus
a/n: yearly fic, dedicated to new lovers
masterlist - i no longer have a tag list but you can follow @theafterglowlibrary to get updates! 🤍
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You shoved him off of you, heart racing, breaths coming fast. You had said Bucky’s name, had whispered it in your most intimate moment, and now you needed to leave.
You said nothing else, gathering up your clothes and pulling them on as quickly as you could.
“Wha-”
The door slammed behind you, cold winter winds whipping around you as you realized you’d left your jacket on the hook by the door. It was your favorite, but one you were okay sacrificing as long as you didn’t have to face your embarrassment anymore.
Huffing a breath you could see in front of your face, you called an Uber - at least you had remembered your phone - and paced anxiously a block away from his building, hoping and praying he wouldn’t follow you out.
The entire ride home your mind spiraled until you turned off your phone, terrified this would make headlines already and, let’s be honest, no one would be surprised if it did. You hated that was the life you lived. As if your breakup with Bucky hadn’t already been tabloid fodder for weeks now, the public speculating every detail and warping every comment and photo posted. You had taken to keeping off social media altogether in the time since, trying to disguise your outings as much as possible and take back alleys to recordings and friends’ houses.
Your biggest supporter through all of this, surprisingly, had been Steve - Bucky’s best friend. He hadn’t been your friend first, sure, but he had become like a brother to you nonetheless, and he knew the situation better than anyone. You knew he still talked to Bucky just the same and, while that stung a little, you couldn’t fault him for being there for his childhood best friend too.
Which is how you ended up outside his apartment the very next morning, clad in your typical-as-of-late attire of a hoodie and a hat and sunglasses. It was also how you came face to face with Bucky for the first time since that fateful night.
“I didn’t come to sit here and watch you stare at your feet, James.” You stood from his couch, starting to seethe with pent up anger from your gradually failing relationship, all to end up here. What did he want? To absolve his guilt and shake hands and everything would be fine?
No. You had been the victim of his petty remarks and anxious jealousy for so long. You wouldn’t let him think he deserved your time when he didn’t respect the person you had become. 
Your anger flashed back to the week before, the last time you had been seen out in public together as he was breaking up with you at your favorite coffee shop, where he had paid for your drink and you gave him a hesitant kiss, even though you knew it was inevitably coming. He had led you to a table in the corner and proceeded to tell you that he was sorry but he couldn’t do this anymore, it was too much for him - you were too much for him. Okay. That’s all you said was “okay” before you pushed out of the chair and walked around the city until the sun went down.
By the time you got home that night, the headlines were already speculating your breakup, though neither of you had yet to shed a single tear.
-
Bucky blinked as you shuffled on Steve’s doorstep, eyes wide and contemplating the quickest escape. He didn’t blame you.
He had admittedly not handled your breakup the best; in fact, he regretted it almost immediately at the stricken look on your face, clearly not expecting it. He didn’t blame you for that, either, seeing as it had slipped out in a moment of panic.
You had gained a lot of fame over the course of your relationship, even more than him, and he didn’t quite know how to cope with it. And so the words had poured out, unable to be taken back, and here you were, weeks later, still at odds.
He thought every night of how to make it up to you. Public displays weren’t your thing and you had blocked his number the night of your big fight, so that was out of the question, and he didn’t fancy showing up to your house only to have the door slammed in his face either.
But now, now maybe that you were here on the most neutral ground you could stand on, maybe he could keep his foot out of his mouth and apologize. Words stirred in his hindsight, unable to string together a coherent sentence as your face morphed through the stages of grief in record time. Then, just as he was about to speak, Steve placed a hand on his shoulder and gently guided him back into the house. Relief flooded your face as you drifted out of his sight, and he realized this probably wasn’t going to be as easy to take back as he thought.
“Buck,” Steve said as the two of them turned around the corner. “You need to leave.”
Bucky felt his face do something awful, a mixture of confusion and guilt, but he decided to keep his mouth shut. He simply nodded and kept his head down as he shrugged on his jacket and passed by you in the doorway.
He could hear the soft sound of your sobs as the front door clicked shut.
-
Songwriting could be as easy as breathing and as hard as climbing a mountain. Right now, the words flooded out of you like a tap of water.
And so did the tears, staining your notebook paper and smearing ink, but still in your heart you knew you would never forget these lyrics - these words that so painstakingly came from your soul and laid it bare.
As you finished the last verse, you took a deep breath, sucked up the tears, and called Natasha. 
-
“Steve, I need to talk to her,” Bucky whined over a beer in a rundown bar in Brooklyn.
“No, you don’t.”
“I can fix it, I know I can.”
“I don’t think you can, Buck.” Steve ran a hand through his hair, a deep sigh leaving his lips. “She’s trying to move on. Don’t ruin that for her.”
“But-”
“No.”
Bucky mimicked Steve’s sigh and leaned back in his chair. It had been increasingly hard to justify his decision to end things with you. He didn’t know what he was thinking and he regretted every moment of it since then. 
“Do you think she misses me?” Bucky looked so hopeful, but he could see the sorrow in Steve’s eyes.
“I don’t know.”
-
The Grammys, the fucking Grammys, and you were performing. You were nominated for a couple, and the Academy had asked you to sing - preferably a new song - in honor of that.
Natasha wrapped you in a hug, twirled you around, and announced you were going out to celebrate. You hesitantly said yes, knowing the press would be everywhere and there was always the possibility of seeing Bucky.
But fuck him. This was your moment.
Which is how you ended up at your favorite dive bar in Brooklyn. Your first mistake.
It was your favorite because Bucky had taken you there so many times. But you couldn’t think of another place you would celebrate than the place where so much inspiration and so many lyrics had come from.
You didn’t scan the room as you walked in with your hand clutching Nat’s, the rest of your small circle of friends following close behind. Your second mistake.
Walking straight to the bar, you didn’t notice Bucky in the far corner, watching your every move. It wasn’t until you were a few drinks in, feeling the celebration kick in, that you spotted him.
At first, you intended to ignore him. This was your time, your night, your moment. He didn’t get the spoil that.
That is, until you went to the bathroom and he trailed you into the dimly lit hallway.
“Baby,” he whispered, his voice a harsh rasp of beer and no sleep. “I’ve missed you.”
Your heart stopped beating in your chest.
You weren’t prepared to see him tonight, not that you ever were these days. But tonight of all nights, the one that should have been carefree and fun and a glittery memory for years to come, was smeared with anger and heartbreak as you spun to face him.
“What the fuck,” you snapped as his fingers grazed your bare arm. Immediately you felt bad, seeing the hurt on his face, and your expression softened. “Sorry.”
“I-it’s okay.” The catch in his voice broke your heart, your own watery eyes matching his. For just a moment.
It took you too long to come to your senses - this was the man who had shattered your heart without a second thought - but he was already so close to you. His body only inches from your own, his hot breath fanning your face, and goddamnit you missed him. You missed him so much that your heart broke all over again.
Your mind cycled through a thousand different thoughts all at once: get away, come closer, touch me, keep your hands off. You couldn’t decide what you wanted in the moment.
You were so, so angry, and yet you couldn’t stop yourself from reaching out to him. His hands settled on your waist as the lights overhead flickered. Your hand pressed gently to his cheek, completely of its own volition. Suddenly, you were tracing the planes of the face you had once known so well. He looked older now, like your time apart had aged him, yet his was still as handsome as the day you had first laid eyes on him.
His eyes locked with yours, and neither of you said a word - not him to ask, not you to stop him - as he leaned in to kiss you.
-
It should have felt like a victory - it did feel like a victory - but there was something else there. Something dark and twisted and Bucky couldn’t figure out if it was coming from you or him.
The kiss could have lasted moments or a lifetime, he didn’t really know. All he knew was one second you were holding him close to you and the next you were shoving him off.
“Fuck fuck fuck,” your voice came out in a whisper, like you didn’t want to draw attention from the steadily growing crowd of the bar. He supposed you didn’t.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” You nodded at his words, your fingers pressed to your lips like you could still feel him there. “I’ll just go.”
You nodded again, your eyes vacant, and he made his way back to the main room of the bar. He looked back in time to see you slump against the wall, and he knew that you were thinking of a way to erase any trace of him on you.
-
The stage lights came on, you strummed your guitar and started to sing.
The first time I tasted somebody else’s spit, I had a coughing fit.
You let the lyrics you poured your heart into spill out across the stage. Still, somehow - in the crowd of hundreds of faces - you spotted Bucky.
This time, it didn’t make your heart clench. Didn’t make you shed a tear or run away.
No. This time, it empowered you. Let him hear the lyrics he inspired. Let him feel that pain of your words and feel the hole in your heart where he had broken it. Where you were now healing.
-
Bucky watched as you sang, and you were mesmerizing. He could feel the echoes of hurt in your words, the hole in your heart he had put there. He knew, despite the last time he saw you, that there was no making up. There was no fixing what was well beyond broken. No chance for him.
In five years I hope the songs feel like covers,
Dedicated to new lovers.
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Note
The fire nation's defeat was technically Azula's fault.
Zuko and Iroh were branded traitors and failures. Azula was given specific instructions to capture them, dead or alive. Azula had them both red-handed in Ba Sing Se. Instead of doing what she was told, she asks for Zuko's help and she clears his name in return.
Now, it could be argued that without Zuko's help, she would've been pummeled into submission by Aang and Azula. Well, then after his usefulness was used up, she had a chance to pull yet another fast one and apprehend him without having to lie to Ozai.
Zuko acted suspiciously. He made Azula doubt that Aang really died and she began to think that Zuko may have had something to do with his survival. Instead of searching for proof of Aang's survival and informing her suspicions to Ozai, she puts unnecessary risk on herself and sets up a gambit that was ultimately pointless in more ways than one.
If Azula did what she was supposed to do, Zuko and Iroh would be dead or put in prison which leads to Zuko never finding out about the plans with the comet, Aang never finds a firebending sifu, the FN gains victory unopposed, and Azula can reign as Fire Lord.
In short, by choosing to lend Zuko a hand more than once, she indirectly did Team Avatar a huge favor.
Boom: Butterfly Effect.
The FN's MVP was also Team Avatar's MVP. I do enjoy the irony.
I wonder though, what would the Gaang's, Azula's Zuko's, Iroh's, Ozai's, and all of FN's reactions when realizing this epiphany?
It would break Azula.
...no seriously. It would break her.
While I think it would be a bit of a stretch to say that the defeat of the Fire Nation was her fault (cause there's no way in hell she could've seen bringing Zuko home would end up with his betrayal of Ozai), I do think she was hurting already with Zuko betraying her. If she was torn up about Mai and Ty Lee turning on her, I have no doubt she'd feel the same about Zuko regardless of what her relationship with him is right now. Add on to the fact that this is a girl that is hoisted with way too much responsibility than she is able to handle (being driven to become perfect at any cost), a revelation like this would destroy her.
And the fallout wouldn't be pretty. At all. It would probably rival her breakdown at Sozin's Comet, if not be worse. Hell, I think Zuko and Iroh would be a bit concerned for her. Zuko did seem somewhat regretful at her state after the Last Agni Kai and Iroh (while not Azula's biggest fan) probably wouldn't be that callous to brush her off.
Ozai would hate her though. Hate hate HATE her though. He puts on so much pressure for her to be perfect. What do you think the abusive piece of shit is going to do when he puts two and two together. Might even disown her on the spot, which will cause her to spiral even more. And she'd probably lose a lot of support in the Fire Nation for indirectly letting an unpopular successor on the throne, which would cause her to spiral even further.
...kind of why I don't really want to put the blame on the Fire Nation's defeat on her since the poor kid doesn't need that on top of her failures already. Besides, I think the defeat of the Fire Nation can better be laid on Ozai's feet. I mean, he was the one who banished Zuko and mistreated both him and Azula. If we want to go indirect, he set up a domino effect. And directly, he wasn't able to consolidate the Fire Nation's gains at the end of the war which led to a huge rebellion movement. And he certainly didn't seem to want to get involved with fighting Aang during the Day of the Black Sun which could've stacked the odds further against him when the firebending was turned back on. Mind you, this was before Zuko showed up. Like he was sipping tea while Azula was holding the Gaang off.
That being said, I could see him pass the buck off on Azula for the Fire Nation's defeat. Which would lead into the scenario I just outlined above.
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incendiobrock · 5 hours
Text
Clout Chaser {Chris Sturniolo}
Request: Could I request a Chris x reader.she has a huge crush on him but he waste his time getting heartbroken by a girl just using him.when he finds out she is just using him for clout it sends him in a spiral.The reader is there to help mend his heart. (Action 7)very much angst some fluff at the end please.
Prompt(s): A telling B they deserve better
Warnings: language, heartbreak, fluffy ending!
A/N: idk how i feel about this one 😔
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Chris was never really a relationship person. Sure, he had some brief talking stages throughout high school, and had his share of a couple situationships but never anything serious. He made it pretty clear to everybody that he wasn’t interested in dating and didn’t think he would be interested for a while.
Chris had fully meant that too, that is until he met a girl while he was out shopping one day. Her name was Jax and she quickly became a constant in Chris’ life. After Jax was introduced you started being put on the back burner. You had been friends with the triplets for years and there was no denying that you had a huge crush on Chris.
The crush started out small, a little school girl type crush is how you would describe it but it grew tremendously over the years as you became a young adult. You never had any intention of telling Chris about it, wanting to respect his boundaries and understanding his want to stay single, which is exactly why your heart had shattered when he announced that him and Jax were together.
His new relationship with Jax drove a wedge between your friendship. She didn’t like him being so close to another girl, friend or not. Chris quickly became distant and it was hard to ignore when you would still spend a lot of time at their place, continuing to hang out with Matt and Nick.
As you sat in the living room of the triplets house one morning you scrolled through Netflix trying to find something to watch. The sun gently gleamed through the big windows, early morning setting in. None of the boys were awake yet and you didn’t want to disturb them so you stayed on your bed (the couch). As you clicked through some more shows a prominent knock was heard on the front door. You weren’t expecting anyone this early but maybe the boys got a package delivered. Your feet echoed through the hall as you ran down the stairs to open the door.
“Oh, hey.” You half smiled, looking at Jax as she stood in front of you. Jax looked up from her phone and rolled her eyes at you, “Didn’t realize you were going to be here.”
“Yeah, I slept over last night-“
“I didn’t ask.” She snarked, shoulder checking you as she welcomed herself into the boys home, going straight down the hall into Chris’ room.
You stood frozen in the doorway for a minute before shutting the door. Did that really just happen? Jax always seemed to be bothered by your presence in the boys lives but you had been friends with them way before she ever came around so you weren’t planning on leaving. You stomped back up the stairs and locked eyes with Nick, who was now awake and standing in the kitchen.
“Woah. Why do you look so pissed off?” Nick chuckled, noticing the scowl playing on your face as he pulled a box of cereal out of the pantry. A huff fell past your lips as you made your way over to the table and pulled out a chair, taking a seat and abruptly dropping your head onto the hard surface. “Miss sunshine and rainbows is here unannounced! Completely ruined my morning.”
Nick’s eyes widen as he poured milk into his bowl, “Why is she here this early?” Luckily Nick seemed to hate Jax just as much as you did, something was off about her and you both were trying to get to the bottom of it. You lifted your head up and watched as Nick shoveled some apple jacks into his mouth. Shrugging your shoulders in response you felt your stomach churn. Chris was too amazing to be dating someone like her…
“We were planning on filming a vlog today if you want to join. You know you’re always welcome, maybe it will help you keep your mind off of everything.” Nick offered, shooting you a genuine smile, knowing about your hidden feelings for his younger brother.
“Keep your mind off what?” Matt’s voice said as he came out of his bedroom, his hair shooting in different direction from his nightly slumber.
“Jax.” You deadpanned, stealing Nick’s spoon and copying his movements as you yourself shoveled some cereal into your mouth. As you chewed the bite you had taken the room in the air turned cold, causing your brows to furrow as you looked between Matt and Nick. With cereal still in your mouth you spoke up again, “Why are you guys being so quiet?”
“What about me?” A voice behind you sassed, the hairs on your arm standing up as you realized why Matt and Nick had stopped talking. Quickly, you gulped down the cereal and turned in your chair to see Jax and Chris standing side by side, his arm swung over her shoulders. “Yeah, are you guys having fun without us?” Chris asked, oblivious to the tension shared between you and his girlfriend.
“I’m going to go brush my teeth and get dressed.” Matt said, excusing himself from the conversation and b-lining down the hall. The tension was finally cut as Chris began talking to Nick about the vlog they would be filming today. Jax never let up on the glares she would send you as she moved around the kitchen with Chris, helping him make some eggs, sausage links, and toast for breakfast. It was in moments like these you were thankful for Nick as he stayed by your side and did his best to hold a conversation with Chris.
After everybody was dressed and ready for the day you followed Nick out of his room as he started messing with the camera, turning it on and going to find Matt.
Matt checked his hair in the bathroom mirror, giving the audience a quick spiel about his target thermal, causing you and Nick to laugh from behind the camera. The fans were used to seeing you appear in their videos at this point, always leaving comments when they would hear you in the background.
Jax pushed past you for the second time today, making her way in front of the camera. Fans had started noticing her in the videos too, soft launching her and Chris’ relationship through small moments they had shared in other recent videos.
“Did you already tell them where we are going today Matt?” She asked, fake niceness dripping off her venomous fangs. “Awww, Matt’s got a boo boo.” Chris teased, now appearing in the frame next to Jax as she took hold of his hand.
Nick turned the camera around to the two of you as he explained that Matt had been experiencing some ankle pain for months, and they were finally all taking a group trip to urgent care so he could get it checked out. You felt all of your energy drain out of your body as you observed Jax and Chris from behind the camera, watching silently as she seemed to always have something to say. Even her laugh pissed you off, you couldn’t seem to figure out what it was about her that rubbed you the wrong way.
—-
A couple days had passed and you were back at the triplets place for dinner. Nick had uploaded the vlog for their Wednesday video a little earlier and you decided to scroll through the comments as you both sat side by side on the couch.
I hope y/n is doing okay, she didn’t seem like herself in this vid 🥺
omg did you guys see jax and chris in the background at 12:53???? i’m glad chris is happy !!!
ugh jax is gorgeous i love seeing her in the videos
more jax content plzzz!!!! (and y/n) love them both 🫶
Bad choice. You were agitated that everybody seemed to love the girl that you were beginning to despise. It was almost like it was all an act. She was a complete stuck up bitch off camera, but as soon as the camera was rolling she was the nicest person anyone has ever met.
As you felt yourself spiraling down a hole of despair Nick gently nudged your arm, causing you to look at him as he sat beside you on the couch. He gave you a questioning look, silently asking what was up. Without words, you handed the phone over to him, showing him the comments all praising Jax. Glancing over the back of the couch you saw Jax at the kitchen table, her phone propped up against a candle as she continued her tiktok live.
“Baby, come say hi to my live?” Jax probed, positioning her phone so that Chris was in view. Chris smiled and waved to the camera, watching as the live flooded with thousands of viewers.
Jax began gushing over the attention she was getting, just by bringing Chris into the frame. That’s when it hit you, she was just using him for fame and views. “God, I’m gonna be sick.” You mumbled, pushing yourself off the couch and storming up the stairs into Nick’s room, slamming the door behind you and hoping that everybody heard it.
One of your hands aggressively rubbed over your face as you paced around the bedroom. You couldn’t believe that it had taken you so long to piece it together, the mood switches on and off camera seemed so obvious now. A voice from the staircase caused you to jump slightly,
“Y/n? Are you okay?”
“Chris what are you doing? I’m sure she’s fine, you don’t have to check up on her.” Jax’ voice followed, snapping at him like he was some sort of dog. Normally, Chris would bend to her every command so you were even more shocked to hear a knock on the door. It cracked up slightly, Chris peering in around the frame and making eye contact with you as you stayed glued to the middle of the floor.
Chris fully walked in, leaving the door wide open behind him which allowed Jax to stand in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest.
“What? No more tiktok live? You’ll probably get millions of viewers! People love drama.” You spat, finally not caring about trying to remain civil towards her. Jax stared back at you, swallowing her nerves as she realized you had read through her little act.
“What’s going on?” Chris asked, looking between the both of you as he stood in the middle of your staring contest.
“Tell him, Jax,” You edged. “Tell him that you’ve just been using him for views.”
Chris turned back towards his girlfriend, his confusion being replaced with sadness, “Is that true?” He searched her face in hopes that she would instantly deny the accusation being thrown at her, but she remained silent. A look of guilt played on her face as her lip began to quiver.
“Chris, look… I-I can explain.” She stuttered, her voice coming out shaky and weak. Chris shook his head, knowing there was nothing she could say that would make things better.
“No, get the fuck out of my house Jax. We’re done.” He pointed his finger down to the floor, telling her to leave.
“But Chris I-“
“I said leave!” He yelled, tears filling his eyes, he could barely look at the girl. Timidly, Jax descended down the stairs, tail between her legs as she faced defeat. Chris felt his body trembling with nerves and anxiety, ultimately falling apart when he heard her go out of the front door. A sob escaped his lips as he slowly turned around to see you still standing there.
“Oh Chris…” You cooed, walking over to the broken, brown haired, boy and pulling him down into a hug. You gently ran your hand over the boys head, smoothing his hair. Chris felt like his world was tumbling apart. This was why he wasn’t a relationship person. This was why he was closed off, because why would anybody want to experience pain like this?
“I’m so so sorry. You deserve so much better Chris.” You whispered into his shoulder, pressing a firm kiss there without a second thought. Chris’ sobs began to die out as he allowed you to keep holding him, whispering sweet nothings into his ears. Finally, he broke away from your embrace, his eyes red and puffy from the tears he’d shed.
“We’re not all like that you know. There’s going to be a girl out there who loves you for you and who treats you the way you deserve. None of that superficial bullshit is going to matter because all that will matter is her love for you.” You reassured him, your hands still resting on either side of his neck on his shoulders.
“How can you be so sure?” He whispered.
“Because I love you Chris. And I have for a long time now, I just didn’t want to overstep your boundaries since I knew you weren’t super keen on relationship…”
His face prepped up at confession, a small smile forming across his lips. “I love you too.”
Now, it was your turn to be confused, a quizzical expression playing on your face. Did you really hear what you thought you heard, or were you dreaming?
“Can I kiss you?” He asked, his hand coming up to rest below your chin, his thumb running over your bottom lip. Your lips parted as he traced over it with his thumb, heat spreading through out your body.
You nodded your head, granting him permission to kiss you. His hand gently pushed your chin up as he brought his lips down to connect with yours in a deep kiss. A hum escaped you as you kissed him back, his tongue snaking his way in, tasting all of you. The kiss was better than you could’ve ever imagined and now that you’ve felt it you weren’t sure how you had gone so long without it.
After a few more seconds Chris pulled away, pressing a firm and final kiss on your lips almost as if he was sealing the deal.
Thank god Jax was finally gone.
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argisthebulwark · 1 day
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So I'm gonna waltz in here because I'm still brewing bodyguard vilkas and what you think of him? My despiction of him as well is around that, protector who takes his job seriously, first and foremost.
I can picture him pulling out different antics, like HOT ways to protect the dragonborn like pinning them against a wall and use his body as cover from falling objects. But share more of your hcs of him 👉👈
(Waltz off 💃🏻)
YESS omg... i definitely think he'd start off being super professional and taking everything seriously, i feel like he takes everything seriously. he'd be really vigilant. "no, you sleep i'll keep watch" "let me go first just in case there's traps" "stay behind me, i'll protect you" type of dude.
YEAHH god the dragonborn dragging him down in some old ruin in one of the many fetch quests they take. he would be sooo annoyed by fetch quests but at least it breaks up the monotony of clearing out their tenth bandit camp. he spots too late that a trap's been triggered and tackles them. ohhh noo, the big man has them pinned...his nice big body's on theirs and his face is so close when he asks if they're okay.... he sees the dragonborn's cheeks get all pink when they stare up at him, not even trying to remove their wrists from his hands... how awful....
i think he's super intrigued by the dragonborn internally but his introverted ass doesn't know how to ask questions. i'd pair him with a dragonborn who doesn't do well with social cues just for the sillies. he wants to ask questions about them, to get to know them better, but gets tongue tied every time he asks anything more personal than "so what's your last name?"
he'd pick up on little things. he'd note if the dragonborn's left handed or leaves the same opening during a battle and cover them without thinking. he'd notice if they like butter or jam with their breakfast and wordlessly pass it to them. he'd probably like finding little things they share - preferences in how they take their coffee or laughing at the same jokes.
he's used to being perceived as a resource - whether it's for his intelligence or his trustworthiness in battle, i think it's how he'd come to view himself. he trains the new recruits to strengthen the companions, he learns as much as possible to aid Kodlak, he protects the dragonborn because it's what he's told to do - he gives without expecting anything in return. he'd expect the same treatment from the dragonborn until he notices them doing little favors for him or taking him into consideration, asking where he'd like to travel or bandaging his wounds, i think it would throw him off a bit.
i know his ass would be soft for casual intimacy!!! vilkas internally losing his shit when the dragonborn offers to put his hair up or help remove his armor!! he tries to maintain the outward indifference but inside his tummy would be full of butterflies!!! when he finds himself doing the same... when he catches himself wiping dust from their cheek or hands brushing together when they walk too close.... oh it's so over for him.
he'd get so flustered when farkas demands to meet the dragonborn. he picks up on vilkas' feelings so easily he probably realizes his brother's feelings are more than just professional before vilkas does. when he insists on meeting the dragonborn vilkas tries to keep things as professional as possible, which is promptly ruined by farkas the dragonborn giggling about how cranky he gets in the morning.
he would probably hate being dragged to stuffy meetings, but being the last dragonborn's personal bodyguard gave him immunity to make snarky little remarks. he likes bothering the advisors who do nothing but sit and ponder all day, i think he'd view them as inactive in the face of real problems and getting under their skin is his only reprieve from the boredom.
SORRY i rambled so much but omg.......him........
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Pressure Got My Head in Knots
🩸Previous Parts Here🩸
Dom x Colson (Yungblud x Machine Gun Kelly)
Warnings: ABO dynamics (knots, slick, heat), alpha serial killer/hitman Dom, omega mob boss Kells, mentions of killing, allusions to past abuse, cursing, allusions to trafficking, awkward boys, stilted conversation, bad dreams, night terrors, mentions of Dom's pretty uncut monster cock, misunderstandings, embarrassment, insults, stiff sleeping positions, boys cuddling, emerging feels, passage of time (not long), too much metaphor (I won't apologize), secret masterbation, improper use of a t shirt (they're always cum goblins), hurt/comfort, accidental grinding, biting/marking, blood, nervous boys, enemies to lovers 💣 Rating: explicit
All ideas helped by @iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker 🖤
The roof was almost becoming a comfort for Dom. It was his spot really. He could look out over the terrible city they lived in and ponder how many Alphas were just waiting for his knife. He hadn't killed anyone since before he met the omega but it steadied him to think about it. He'd been coming here since their afternoon together and occasionally sleeping on the balcony. He never meant to fall asleep but the night after they fucked he went to check on Colson and thought he heard him sound pained. He was whimpering and sounded scared and it made Dominic’s blood run cold. After a moment he realized the man was only having a bad dream but the sight of the strong mob boss curling a pillow against his chest like a teddy bear hurt the heart Dom didn't think he had. Since he couldn't comfort him and didn't even know how he'd desired at least to stay close. Watch over him. Most nights he stayed on the balcony but he would escape before the sun rose and sleep fitfully in his own bed.
He was having trouble making himself take that last step off the edge of the building after what Collette had told him earlier at the club. He hadn't expected to feel so torn up inside knowing his… lover? had been hurt so badly but he was filled with shite he didn't know how to deal with. He was scared if he saw the man again he'd accidentally show somehow that he knew. They matched in so many ways besides just being devils in the playground of LA’s underworld. He never expected that. His gaze rolled up to the blank black sky, devoid of stars and didn't that just match his soul. “Fuck.” He huffed, stomping out his cigarette before he took the leap. For once he didn't smile at the rush of air tickling him and when his feet touched down his stomach dropped.
The first thing he noticed wasn't the light still on in the bedroom and it wasn't the pacing omega shadow ghosting over him- it was the glass door that was normally locked tight. For once it was… open?
Colson was exhausted after his long fucking night. He swore the universe was screwing with him. First the shipment of omegas was stolen out from under him and then his mother had pulled him aside when they got home. She lived on another floor and when they were out together they always shared a car. Collette had waited until they were walking inside and she finally spoke up about that fucking psycho. She'd explained gently how terrible Dom looked, that she didn't think the boy was sleeping any better than him. She'd kept her voice loving when she suggested he just give him a chance, what could it hurt having a friend?
He knew her better than that and he knew she knew him. Col didn't make friends easily and whatever was between them wasn't that. Dom knew what he was. Dom had quite literally been inside him, something no one else had ever been allowed. Since they slept together he couldn't sleep right. Old memories came back with a vengeance. She knew all of that, she knew his history, hell she'd lived it too. She'd slipped in one simple thing that had made him think and he hated it. He hated how damn well it worked on him. Travis would have loved him. The thing that pissed him off most was that she was right. Fuck.
“Ello.” The word was simple but it made Colson jump and he reached for a gun he didn't have. He rolled his eyes and turned to face the other man, his heart racing in his chest.
Collette had been right, Dom looked like hell. His eyes were tired and dark, his wild hair almost limp. He looked like a kicked puppy and Kells knew he was behind the boot. Damnit. “Hey.” Well… that was helpful. They were like awkward teenagers at the prom and not two mostly full grown men who knew each other intimately.
Dom tried to look less intimidating by slipping his hands in his hoodie pocket. LA heat was rough but sometimes he needed something to hide in. He didn't step too far into the room, he wasn't sure he was welcome. He'd already done damage with his cock, he wouldn't make it worse. He couldn't stop his gaze from wandering though- Colson was just in jeans and nothing else. The man was gorgeous and he almost couldn't believe he knew exactly what he felt like from the inside. Oh fuck he had to stop thinking like that. Col arched a brow as if he could feel Dom’s thoughts and moved to sit on the foot of the bed. Something made him curse under his breath and reposition himself. “You still ‘urt?”
Kells scoffed and shook his head. He didn't think whatever had twinged in his belly was from the Alpha's monster dick and even if it was he'd never say so. He couldn't give him the satisfaction. “Just pulled a muscle in the gym I think. You good?”
Dom startled at the question. He wasn't sure how to answer that so he just hip checked the dresser and stared at the other man. “No. But you ain't nei’ver. Jus’ been sleeping off.” He tried to lighten the statement with a tease but it fell flat. The omega had to know he'd been sleeping on the balcony if he left it open. He just wasn't used to trying to be a person, Tom never expected it from him. Maybe he shouldn't try to fake it with Colson either. “So you got fucked tonight?”
Col’s eyes went wide and for a moment he thought to clutch his pearls. Where the fuck did this asshole get the audacity?
“The meeting! At ya club. Seemed like it didn't go right. I didn't mean- bloody ‘ell.” The Alpha went so pink and his voice so rushed. His accent thick enough to walk on. Something happened inside the omega, something he really wasn't used to. The embarrassment from the Alpha made him laugh.
Dom smirked as the other man laughed at him. It was such a nice sound he didn't even mind it was at his expense. He was just happy to help however he could. “Fink I would ‘ave noticed summat else. I jus’- Yeah, yeah. Make fun of the guy wiv the silly accent.”
“Dude, fuuuuck that was good. Thanks for that. Yeah uh… I got screwed over tonight. A shipment of omegas was coming in from the East Coast and someone jacked it.” Kells wiped his eyes and tried to stop his laughing, it kept setting off whatever was aching in his stomach. Fuck, his body was feeling strange since he went off the blockers. He wasn't looking forward to what else was in store. What if his heats were a regular thing now? Maybe it was smart to let the Alpha hang around. It wasn't like he'd trust anyone else to help. He didn't know if that meant he trusted the killer already though or not. It took him a moment to realize Dom had gone quiet and he looked up to see the Alpha look away. “I don't sell them. I save them. I figured mom told you? Why the fuck would you come back if you seriously thought I was selling people?” He was truly shocked. He could see the contempt fade from the other man's face and a look of relief shone in his darkened jade eyes. Dom killed Alphas for less. He came to put Col down because of it… Why would he still show up?
“You needed me.” The Alpha shrugged but something tight and messy in his chest relaxed. He could see the omega working through something mentally but he didn't push. He wanted to be welcome.
Colson ignored the way that statement made him feel, especially how easily Dom said it. Instead he moved to crawl up the bed and settle under the blankets, carefully working off his jeans once he was safely hidden from view. He tossed them at the Alpha who caught them and tried his hardest not to sniff. Kells saw it though, those tired eyes flashed red before he folded the pants and set them aside. “Just so you know, my adoptive dad started this. He bought omegas and gave them new lives. I took over for him.” He explained simply. He was too exhausted to get into too much detail and it felt strange to talk because it didn't feel strange to talk to Dom. He was feeling too much to simply talk, especially after what he just realized. The killer ignored his deepest beliefs because he needed him. How was he supposed to handle that?
The Alpha wondered if he should leave but Colson patted the bed next to him. “Shut the fucking door and come to bed. Aren't you tired?”
After a moment Dom nodded and did as he was told before he walked around the bed. He tried to keep his mind from wandering to the night they met or how pretty the other would look spread out under him. His bite scar twinged as he took a seat on top of the covers and he rested back against the headboard. He kept to himself, his ankles crossed and his hands in his pockets. He didn't trust himself to do anything else. “Fanks.” He sighed, letting his eyes close as he leaned his head back but he could feel the other man staring at him.
“You're a fucking weirdo. I hope you know that.” Colson huffed with a playful edge to his voice. He didn't mean to scoot closer but he did by just a few inches as he tried to find comfort on his side. One thing he liked about being off his blockers hit him as he took a breath and closed his eyes.
The creepy psycho Alpha smelled like home.
🖤🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🖤
When Colson woke up the next morning he was surprised to realize how well he slept and even more so because at some point he'd inched over the rest of the space between them to cuddle against Dom’s side even though the Alpha never moved a bit. He pried himself away as carefully as possible to let the man sleep and promptly removed himself from the situation pushing the thought out of his mind. He couldn't process everything happening so instead he thought he'd work out. He could keep his days normal and decide what to do with the other man at night.
🌛
Dom appeared again once the sun went down, though of course he'd been watching most of the day. He was excited to jump to the balcony and even found himself smiling when he saw the door open. He wasn't used to being welcomed. Expected. Potentially even… wanted? They still didn't really talk but that night when Kells gave him a look he pulled his hoodie off and slipped free of his shoes. Waiting on the bed was an extra blanket and as he got comfortable he tugged it over himself. He still made sure to keep separate but he let himself lay down that night.
🖤🩸🩸🩸🩸🖤
Yet again Colson found himself glued to the Alpha when the sun rose, his arm over the other man's chest. He huffed softly at himself but lingered a moment, taking a second to explore and memorize his bedmate’s face. Without the stress of their waking lives etched into Dom's features he appeared every bit his young age. The omega was tempted to kiss his plush lips but he forced himself to disengage, he had shit to do and he still didn't want to get attached. They were just… helping each other sleep. That was it.
🌛
As Dom closed and locked the glass door behind him that night he was surprised to see Colson watching him and holding the other side of the blankets up. The extra he'd been granted the night before was gone and the omega was smiling like he'd pulled the perfect prank. “I don't like jeans in bed. Don't be an asshole.” The mob boss grumbled and Dom had to obey. Even though he'd fucked the man it still felt weirdly intimate to undress to his boxer briefs and t shirt in front of him. Col smiled as the Alpha slipped in bed and for the first time they laid under the same sheet and faced each other. They fell asleep talking lightly about what had happened that day even though Dom already knew it all. To the Alpha it was starting to feel like home.
🖤🩸🩸🩸🖤
Kells sighed as he woke up, pressing his face into the Alpha's messy hair. They were tangled together and he wasn't surprised that even though Dom was asleep, part of his monster was very very awake. He let himself smile, his belly full of butterflies at the feeling of the psycho hard against him. Dom wasn't the only one but… he couldn't bring himself to do anything. Sleeping together was one thing but sleeping together when it wasn't a life or death situation? Fuck that. A part of his mind whispered ‘soon’ as he pulled himself free and escaped to the bathroom to take care of himself. He thought he might leave the mess on something for Dom to find but he'd be at the gym before the Alpha woke.
🌛
Dom was flipping Colson off as he joined him that night, he still couldn't believe what the bastard did. “Tha’ were me favorite shirt. Twat.” He huffed, getting undressed down to his boxer briefs. He jokingly hid his tee under the pillow instead of leaving it on. The omega had used the shirt on his body as a cum rag while he was sleeping and he wouldn't give him that chance again. If Kells needed relief he could use his bare skin. He didn't push it more than that though, they just laughed together as they got comfortable in bed, facing each other again. That night Dom liked the sound of his lover's laugh so much he found himself telling embarrassing stories. As they started to dirft they inched closer until their fingers touched.
🖤🩸🩸🖤
Colson slept a little fitfully that night so when he woke he wasn't surprised to find the Alpha spooning him and holding him tight. The strong arm he scarred was wrapped over him, that beautiful death dealing hand rest light on his abs. He let himself linger, a little mentally messy from bad dreams and worse memories. He tried to shift and felt a little worse for wear and slightly sick. He hated how much his trauma could still affect him after so long. He was pissed his memory could make him feel so sick so he stayed a little longer in bed and let the snoozing Alpha comfort him. It wasn't like the psycho would know. He'd still leave before Dom woke and ignore his thoughts for the rest of the day.
🖤🩸🖤
It kept on that way for another week. Another. Each night Dom would wander into Col’s bedroom and strip down to almost nothing. They'd settle close but not too in bed and talk. Or not. What they did didn't matter, just that they could help each other sleep.
🖤🖤
It was almost a month of their new routine when something different happened one night. Everything had gone well- Dom showed up, slipped mostly nude in bed, they shared a few laughs or complaints, and drifted off to sleep. Normally the Alpha stayed awake longer to make sure the other was doing well. He had learned to judge how bad Col’s dreams would be by how much he whimpered or whined but that night he was quiet and Dom misjudged what that meant. Shortly after he drifted himself he was woken up by a blood curdling scream. He was jarred awake and instantly on alert, blinking his tired eyes fast. His sight cleared quickly to find Kells fighting himself, full body trembling as he scratched bloody marks in his inked skin.
The Alpha was scared which was an emotion he wasn't used to but he tried to move to help. He gently reached out to stop the assault but one touch was enough to wake the man. For a moment they stared wide eyed at each other before one tear escaped down Col’s cheek. “Colson-” Dom whispered softly, his voice thick with emotion he couldn't share.
“D-Dom?” The omega's voice was small and that one word broke the dam. The normally collected man felt a sob break free and without a second thought he was throwing himself at his lover's chest and crying against his neck.
Dominic wasn't used to comforting anyone but he wrapped his omega tight in his hold and pet his fingers slowly down his back. It was what Tom did for him when he felt shattered and it was all he had to offer besides a softly whispered- “I'm so sorry.”
“Why did he- why did they- why wasn't I good enough?” The Alpha couldn't make out much but he put a few things together from choked words and context clues. Besides that, he'd asked those questions a lot as a boy. He'd grown out of begging the universe for answers about the time he ripped his father open.
“You was. ‘Ush tha’. You was. No one else was for you. I ain't. No one is.” Dom was surprised at the words on his lips but he meant every one of them. It hurt his black heart to hear the strong man sound so young and broken and yet again he vowed to end the people who caused all that pain.
“Fuck you.” Colson whimpered, biting a kiss into his lover's neck. It surprised a moan out of the Alpha which somehow made Kells do it again. “Fuck you.” Curse. Kiss. Bite. A drop of blood hit his tongue. Dom groaned and their bodies moved until they slot perfectly together- cloth covered cock to cloth covered cock.
“Wha'?” Dom didn't know what to do. He could feel his dick filling hard and fast. His shaking hands wandered the sweat slick planes of Col’s inked back and he kept his head tilted. He wouldn't take any liberties but if the omega needed him he would do anything to help. He had his own needs though and they were rushing to the surface, probably making his eyes shine crimson bright.
“Shut the fuck up. Not good enough? Fuck you. Look at you.” Colson didn't know what he was doing. He just knew the more he touched and tasted the younger man the more his hellish dream was erased. At least for the time being. His tongue traced the Alpha's thundering pulse until he sucked a mark on his jaw. His hips rolled as their hands explored and his darkness ebbed slowly.
“Look- look at- fuck Cols?” Dom whined his name like a beg and the omega nodded as they thrust harder. Before he knew it their lips were meeting in a blood flavored kiss.
The Alpha could barely breathe, everything was too hot and so much. His cock was so hard it was poking out the top of his underwear and grinding against Col’s doing the same. They groped each other and pulled the other tighter, their panted breath mingling between rough kisses. Besides their soft moans and needy whimpers the sound of their precum wet bellies sticking together was near deafening.
Neither knew who hit their peak first, it seemed they were sucked under together. One cried out and the other answered and they both spilled a hot rush against their skin. At some point Dom's thigh had fit between Col’s own and the Alpha felt his leg drenched in slick. He didn't say anything but he savored the scent and feel as they rocked through their pleasure with shaking limbs.
Eventually their breathing calmed and their bodies stilled but they didn't pull apart. They weren't even sure they could if they tried. Kells couldn't bring himself to speak so instead he tucked himself under his lover's chin. He couldn't work out what had just happened and he was scared if he tried he'd break the tentative peace. Dom was just as confused but pleasantly pleased, his veins buzzing with pleasure. He just held the other close and pet his back as they drifted, eventually falling asleep again.
At one point Colson thought he heard the Alpha whisper something that felt both true and terrifying. It settled his soul but raced his heart in his chest. “You're safe. ‘Ome.” He tried to ignore it and sleep but he found himself waiting for the sun to rise so he could escape the safety of Dom's arms before he did something stupid like get used to it. Deep down he knew it was too fucking late. He already was. Home.
Author's Note/Tags: @iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker @hollywoodxwhore @jaxbreaker @fenoy7 @cole-way-iero28 if anyone wants tagged let me know 🖤
It's not exactly a birthday fic but at least Kells got some special attention. I know it's a lot of deep feels and it may get worse before it gets better but you know I'm all about the silly happy dumb boys 😂 I hope you enjoyed it! 🩸🖤
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one of the worst feelings ever is wanting to write but your hands hurt too much or the words just don’t want to work so you just sit there staring at a half finished doc with tears in your eyes bc you want to write and you need to write but everything is telling you that you can’t
#and that you’re a terrible writer and that no one cares aaaaaaand imposter syndrome kicks in and you just feel like crap#bc all your friends have been wriying recejtky so why can’t you??? cause they’re bETTER THAN YOU#lol idk why my head is so bad today#the feelings of inferiority and emptiness and idk worthlessness are strong and i hate it but i can’t stop it#i just wanna write!!! and like what i write!!!#but i Can’t and i haven’t liked anything i’ve written in Months and ugh i hate not being able to d something i wanna do#oh and now i’m crying??? why the frick am i cRYING litetally why is typing this making me Worse#sorry guys needed to rant#the inadequacy was strong today#something something students keep telling me how much they dislike me or how i’m whiny for asking them to be respectful and like#i Know i shouldn’t compare myself to my friends but gosh it’s hard when they’re all like. so much better than me.#and i don’t have a lot of time to be on tumblr bc of work so i just feel like i’m watching everything from afar and it’s no one’s fault but#my brain’s like no one is Doing anything it’s just my brain being dumb and i can’t stand it and I want to stop feeling empty and like i’m#missing a part of myself and like the words i write don’t matter gOD why can’t i just feel happy with where i am and not care what the kids#who hate me say or realize that no one cares that i’m not on much like i’m still Here and trying to interact it’s not like everyone hates me#for being busy or for liking side characters more than the main characters and just—#sorry#that felt good actually#idk what came over me#imma just. imma shower. then maybe delete my tags#sorry if anyone got this far aT ALL grace is either asleep or trying to sleep so i don’t wanna bother them since they slept poorly last nigh#okay done now for real sorry delete tags later sorry if you saw this and how freaking messed up ky freaking brain is
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freebooter4ever · 20 days
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holy shit for the first time in ten years i forgot nicks birthday
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neptunite-stars · 9 months
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pain and suffering on planet earth < still sick
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isanyonetoknow · 5 days
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anyways I need so desperately to meet other people whose family is all still in Iran. No shade to the few Iranian friends I’ve had/have but like. Well one of them was like “I would like to go but I just can’t with the government like that” and one reason they can be that comfortable saying that is because a lot of their extended family is here in the us. If I said that then I would never get to see anyone from my extended family. like do you understand how there’s no choice in that situation for me.
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byanyan · 8 months
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being friends with byan is so weird bc they say they want you to have the balls to be bluntly honest with them, but then the very moment you're honest about something they don't like, they're peacing out, all "lmao ok friendship ended byeeeee"
#honesty is great until you're addressing their insecurities or anything they're currently in denial over#they have a... weird relationship with honesty lmao#they'll be harshly honest about almost anything and not pull a single damn punch#they will tell you easily that their biological mother didn't want them and that they've lived on the street#they'll tell you that they haven't had a foster home last more than 10 months & that one of their foster parents almost killed them#but they won't tell you about the misery these events caused & how its shaped them as a person#and then there's the way they can dish it but can't take it#they'll tell you to your face everything that's wrong with you (in their opinion)#but the moment you do the same back.... lmao fuck you what the hell kinda bullshit#they're so SO sensitive. so much more so than they let on. and they don't tolerate being called on their shit well.#but I think part of that is bc they spent a lot of their life being belittled rather than built up#and they ended up feeling like every time they were abandoned it was bc of their flaws#so if ur pointing them out........ it's only a matter of time before ur leaving too. so they better leave first.#but also they just hate being Seen. they hate when someone can see behind their facade.#if someone else can see ur pain that means it's really there or something :)#idk I have way more thoughts about this than I realized when I started typing and now the tags are gonna be longer than the post oops#might....... have to make a note to get into all this in a more in depth headcanon at some point#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ OOC ⋮ DON’T @ ME.
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monogatcri · 10 months
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━━ ˟ ⊰🍁THE CREAKING OF THE SWING paired excellently with the void wind's curtain, the sounds of distant play a forgotten melody in this park's state. The rusted merry-go-round, the swings that had only two remaining in function, the unmoving spring riders that had turned from a jovial sight into a haunting display, the teeter totter condemned nearby.
        It's empty here.
       None come to visit or to play because they enjoy this place, they come here to be alone or to write obscenities upon the rotted wood of the picnic tables. Its beauty had outlived its usefulness, left to die and run an obsolete course as the introduction of other, more entertaining, concepts shifted into view. No one cared about this place because they didn't have to care about it ; what memories were held here don't amount to anything because this wasn't their home, this wasn't their happiest place on earth, this wasn't their entire world...
        Swing's motion stops, head tilted down to stare at phone, dreading each message that passes the screen. What once was a man who would happily run amok with the others now wanted no one near him ; he desired nothing, hated the idea of being touched, wanted to disappear into the obscurity of this diseased park and crumble into nothingness.
        You're not alone, Niwa.
        Foot kicked harshly at the dirt, sending an abundance of dirt flung into the air. A thousand people could scream his name right now and he'd feel alone, he's coming to realize. Why is that? Why is that? Because a thousand people amount to only a skin deep view of who he was as a person. Chains had started to leave imprint on his hands as pale skin turned paper white against his grip. 507 names were what mattered and now they were forever silenced, four names were especially important and now they could never say his name again, and now...it's just Niwa.
        It's just Niwa Hisahide.
        The more he awakens into this modern world, the more he's coming to realize how utterly alone he's feeling. This world isn't his world. This world isn't his world. This world ISN'T HIS WORLD! He doesn't understand it, he can't... Every time he enters a conversation, he feels himself slip down, as though he climbs a mountain made entirely of soap while he's drenched in water.
        Eyes watch his phone light up, dull expression worn like a glove today. Just push through it... A few more hours, just a few, push through it...and then... Head hits against chain, pressing palm further into rigid surface, though by now it's numbed to the pinch. And then what? What would happen?
        Another harsh kick to the dirt, geta striking rock that stopped foot in place, a deep sigh purged from him as he stood from the swing to bend down to pick it up, staring... ❝ I can never return home. ❞ Tatarasuna is gone. His older brother and his sister-in-law were gone. This new world feels hollow. For the first time, he's feeling completely alone and he doubts anyone can comprehend it, understand it, know how that actually feels.
        The only world he knew taken from him so suddenly, the broken hearts that he could have mourned with already moving on with their lives in someplace he cannot find, his chance to find his family gone because he wasn't awake, all because of a stupid heart that wasn't worth all the effort they put into it. The heart that survived when everyone else perished -- the heart that should have given out yet refused to. When he awakened, the media swarmed him the second his wheelchair had exited that hospital, his mind and body reeling in anguish as they bombarded him with questions, flashes blinding this eyes, throwing around facts he barely had time to comprehend inside the walls of privacy -- to say he broke down into tears would be an understatement ; the media shamed him, called him weak, elaborated on this further to say he wasn't fit to take over Tatarasuna in place of his father and that he'd sell the land...yet the parcels that continued to fill his mailbox and consistently shove forth their demands went unanswered, man unable to acknowledge that they were probably right, afraid to prove them right -- that he's too weak...that the land that was granted to him by his family should be sold off...
        The home he lives in was a mockery of what he once loved. The electricity, the modern devices, the way he feels fear every time he awakens. With a pained scream, he throws the rock, hard, the resounding and thunderous CLANG as it strikes the fox shaped spring rider as hollow yet verbose as he feels. ❝ Why couldn't it have just been me?! Why did it have to be everyone else?! WHY?! ❞ 509 lives should still be here -- 509 lives...when it could -- no, should have been one.
        It's a menagerie inside himself, emotions bubbling like tar to encase whatever falls inside it, preserving it for others to witness in full view. Meaningless and meaningful, rational and irrational. If only this wasn't so complicated, linked to so many problems coursing around him at once, then he could untangle it himself, yet deep down, he knows Diluc is right, which hurts worse than he'd like to admit: he needs a professional to deal with this mess ; one person, not even every person he knew, could reach him at this far down of a hole dug.
        Legs collapse beneath him, buckling knees striking dirt first with hands to follow, head lowered to stare blankly at nothing but dirt, what he'd become king of. From there, he does not move.
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tohandatla · 1 year
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Hunter would HATE The Collector being his sibling btw
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